1 00:00:03,021 --> 00:00:04,021 [rock music] 2 00:00:04,021 --> 00:00:04,988 * 3 00:00:04,988 --> 00:00:06,888 >> MY NAME IS ANGELA RAIOLA. 4 00:00:06,888 --> 00:00:08,321 THEY CALL ME "BIG ANG" FOR 5 00:00:08,321 --> 00:00:09,021 SHORT. 6 00:00:09,021 --> 00:00:10,721 >> WE LOVE YOU, ANGELA! 7 00:00:10,721 --> 00:00:13,021 >> I LIKE TO DO EVERYTHING BIG. 8 00:00:13,021 --> 00:00:16,321 BIG BOOBS, BIG CARS, BIG HOUSES, 9 00:00:16,321 --> 00:00:17,654 AND BIG JEWELRY. 10 00:00:17,654 --> 00:00:18,954 SHOW ME THE MONEY. 11 00:00:18,954 --> 00:00:20,321 MAKE THE MONEY AND SPEND THE 12 00:00:20,321 --> 00:00:21,521 MONEY. 13 00:00:21,521 --> 00:00:22,654 YOU GOT IT? 14 00:00:22,654 --> 00:00:23,421 [cocktail shaker rattling] 15 00:00:23,421 --> 00:00:25,221 I RUN A LITTLE LOCAL BAR IN 16 00:00:25,221 --> 00:00:26,554 STATEN ISLAND CALLED 17 00:00:26,554 --> 00:00:27,788 THE DRUNKEN MONKEY. 18 00:00:27,788 --> 00:00:28,988 >> TO YOU, BIG ANG! 19 00:00:28,988 --> 00:00:30,921 >> I LOVE WORKING IN BARS. 20 00:00:30,921 --> 00:00:33,121 THAT IS MY LIFE AND MY JOY, 21 00:00:33,121 --> 00:00:34,221 'CAUSE THAT'S ALL REALLY I KNOW 22 00:00:34,221 --> 00:00:35,454 HOW TO DO. 23 00:00:35,454 --> 00:00:39,154 I HAVE THE BEST PARTIES. 24 00:00:39,154 --> 00:00:41,488 >> OH, MY GOD. 25 00:00:41,488 --> 00:00:42,954 >> AND I'VE SURVIVED IT ALL-- 26 00:00:42,954 --> 00:00:44,821 HOUSE ARREST, WISE GUY AFTER 27 00:00:44,821 --> 00:00:46,388 WISE GUY. 28 00:00:46,388 --> 00:00:48,621 NOW MY PHILOSOPHY IS I'M JUST 29 00:00:48,621 --> 00:00:50,121 GONNA DO WHATEVER THE [bleep] 30 00:00:50,121 --> 00:00:51,254 I WANT. 31 00:00:51,254 --> 00:00:52,588 BECAUSE ONE MINUTE YOU'RE HERE, 32 00:00:52,588 --> 00:00:53,454 THE NEXT MINUTE, YOU'RE [bleep] 33 00:00:53,454 --> 00:00:54,154 DEAD. 34 00:00:54,154 --> 00:00:55,488 I DON'T KNOW WHICH ONE I LOVE 35 00:00:55,488 --> 00:00:57,221 BETTER, YOU OR YOU. 36 00:00:57,221 --> 00:00:58,621 I SPEND ALL MY TIME WITH THE 37 00:00:58,621 --> 00:01:00,088 MONKEYS AT THE BAR... 38 00:01:00,088 --> 00:01:01,621 >> THIS IS TO BANGIN' MAD GIRLS. 39 00:01:01,621 --> 00:01:03,088 >> AND SEX, PIZZA, AND TECHNO 40 00:01:03,088 --> 00:01:04,088 MUSIC. 41 00:01:04,088 --> 00:01:04,821 >> MY CREW... 42 00:01:04,821 --> 00:01:06,388 >> WE'RE THE REAL [bleep] DEAL, 43 00:01:06,388 --> 00:01:07,154 BOTTOM LINE. 44 00:01:07,154 --> 00:01:08,521 >> IF YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO PLAY 45 00:01:08,521 --> 00:01:09,988 THE GAME, DON'T COME IN MY 46 00:01:09,988 --> 00:01:10,854 ARENA. 47 00:01:10,854 --> 00:01:13,521 >> MY LITTLE LOUIE, MY BABY. 48 00:01:13,521 --> 00:01:14,488 [dog growls] 49 00:01:14,488 --> 00:01:16,154 AND MY PSYCHOTIC FAMILY. 50 00:01:16,154 --> 00:01:17,154 >> AAH! 51 00:01:17,154 --> 00:01:18,654 >> EVERYBODY SMILE. 52 00:01:18,654 --> 00:01:20,221 THEY'RE ALL WACKOS, AND I LOVE 53 00:01:20,221 --> 00:01:20,888 THEM. 54 00:01:20,888 --> 00:01:23,288 BUT EVERYONE LOVES BIG ANG. 55 00:01:23,288 --> 00:01:24,288 [spliced-up techno music] 56 00:01:24,288 --> 00:01:25,288 >> * I LIKE THE WISE GUYS 57 00:01:25,288 --> 00:01:26,321 * THE WISE GUYS 58 00:01:26,321 --> 00:01:27,088 * I WANT THAT 59 00:01:27,088 --> 00:01:27,821 * I WANNA HAVE FUN 60 00:01:27,821 --> 00:01:28,554 * AND GET WHACKED 61 00:01:28,554 --> 00:01:30,421 * OH, MY GOD 62 00:01:30,421 --> 00:01:32,421 * I-I LIKE THE WISE GUYS 63 00:01:32,421 --> 00:01:33,988 * THE--THE WISE GUYS 64 00:01:33,988 --> 00:01:37,588 * I-I LIKE THE WISE GUYS 65 00:01:37,588 --> 00:01:38,588 * I WANT A MASSAGE 66 00:01:38,588 --> 00:01:40,554 * FACIAL AND SPRAY TAN 67 00:01:40,554 --> 00:01:41,954 * AND SPRAY TAN 68 00:01:41,954 --> 00:01:43,754 * MASSAGE, FACIAL 69 00:01:43,754 --> 00:01:45,421 * EVERYBODY LOVES ME 70 00:01:52,488 --> 00:01:53,388 >> both: HI, ANGIE. 71 00:01:53,388 --> 00:01:54,721 >> HI, GIRLS. 72 00:01:54,721 --> 00:01:56,088 >> YOU GOT YOUR DRINK ALREADY? 73 00:01:56,088 --> 00:01:58,154 >> OH, NO, I'M NOT WAITING. 74 00:01:58,154 --> 00:01:59,088 WHEN ME AND THE GIRLS GET 75 00:01:59,088 --> 00:02:01,421 TOGETHER, WE'RE NOTHING BUT FUN. 76 00:02:01,421 --> 00:02:02,321 >> THAT LOOKS YUMMY. 77 00:02:02,321 --> 00:02:03,321 >> I GOT A MONKEY. 78 00:02:03,321 --> 00:02:04,554 [laughter] 79 00:02:04,554 --> 00:02:06,121 MY GIRLFRIEND LINDA, I GREW 80 00:02:06,121 --> 00:02:07,321 UP WITH SINCE I'M 13. 81 00:02:07,321 --> 00:02:09,121 SHE'S A [bleep] LUNATIC. 82 00:02:09,121 --> 00:02:10,288 >> I'LL HAVE THE SHOT AND THE 83 00:02:10,288 --> 00:02:11,588 PEEL ON THE SIDE. 84 00:02:11,588 --> 00:02:13,188 >> THAT'S MY LITTLE JEN, 85 00:02:13,188 --> 00:02:14,688 AND SHE'S ALSO ANOTHER [bleep] 86 00:02:14,688 --> 00:02:15,921 LITTLE MANIAC. 87 00:02:15,921 --> 00:02:16,821 >> WHAT'S GOING ON WITH WILD 88 00:02:16,821 --> 00:02:17,754 THING? 89 00:02:17,754 --> 00:02:18,554 [laughter] 90 00:02:18,554 --> 00:02:20,254 >> BACK IN THE DAY, ME AND MY 91 00:02:20,254 --> 00:02:22,321 FRIENDS WERE KNOWN AS THE SIXTH 92 00:02:22,321 --> 00:02:23,221 FAMILY. 93 00:02:23,221 --> 00:02:25,121 >> NOBODY HAS MEMORIES LIKE US. 94 00:02:25,121 --> 00:02:26,154 >> WE HAD A CREW. 95 00:02:26,154 --> 00:02:28,688 >> IT WAS WILD THING, BIG ANG, 96 00:02:28,688 --> 00:02:30,854 CRAZY LINDA, PATTY SLAPS, AND 97 00:02:30,854 --> 00:02:31,954 LITTLE JEN. 98 00:02:31,954 --> 00:02:33,621 >> I WAS ALWAYS LITTLE JEN. 99 00:02:33,621 --> 00:02:34,788 AND THEN WHEN I DIED, I WAS 100 00:02:34,788 --> 00:02:37,121 DROP-DEAD JEN AGAIN. 101 00:02:37,121 --> 00:02:39,221 >> JENNIFER WAS IN A COMA FOR 102 00:02:39,221 --> 00:02:40,388 FIVE MONTHS. 103 00:02:40,388 --> 00:02:41,888 THEY GAVE HER THE LAST RIGHTS 104 00:02:41,888 --> 00:02:43,088 AND EVERYTHING. 105 00:02:43,088 --> 00:02:45,321 >> I HAD PANCREATIC CANCER AND 106 00:02:45,321 --> 00:02:46,954 THEY PRONOUNCED ME DEAD, 107 00:02:46,954 --> 00:02:47,754 BUT GUESS WHAT? 108 00:02:47,754 --> 00:02:49,321 I [bleep] THEM UP GOOD. 109 00:02:49,321 --> 00:02:51,921 >> AND THEN HERE COMES JEN-- 110 00:02:51,921 --> 00:02:52,754 BACK! 111 00:02:52,754 --> 00:02:54,088 >> I WAS, LIKE, THE HOT, 112 00:02:54,088 --> 00:02:55,088 SEDUCTIVE BITCH. 113 00:02:55,088 --> 00:02:56,288 >> SHE WAS THE HOT ONE, AND I 114 00:02:56,288 --> 00:02:57,721 WOULD JUST TAKE ALL THE MONEY. 115 00:02:57,721 --> 00:02:58,954 >> WE WERE HOT BACK THEN. 116 00:02:58,954 --> 00:03:00,521 NOBODY COULD TOUCH US. 117 00:03:00,521 --> 00:03:01,521 >> WE WERE AT THE TABLE WITH ALL 118 00:03:01,521 --> 00:03:02,354 THE WISE GUYS. 119 00:03:02,354 --> 00:03:03,654 >> THEY HAD NO MONEY LEFT, 120 00:03:03,654 --> 00:03:05,221 THERE WAS NO ALCOHOL LEFT, 121 00:03:05,221 --> 00:03:06,821 AND THERE WAS NO GIRLS LEFT, 122 00:03:06,821 --> 00:03:07,988 'CAUSE WE [bleep] CHASED 'EM 123 00:03:07,988 --> 00:03:08,721 ALL. 124 00:03:08,721 --> 00:03:10,254 ALL THE WISE GUYS LOVED ME AND 125 00:03:10,254 --> 00:03:11,988 MY CREW, BUT HALF OF THEM ARE 126 00:03:11,988 --> 00:03:13,154 [bleep] DEAD. 127 00:03:13,154 --> 00:03:14,621 THE OTHER HALF ARE RATS. 128 00:03:14,621 --> 00:03:16,721 AND THE OTHER [bleep] HALF ARE 129 00:03:16,721 --> 00:03:17,688 DECREPIT. 130 00:03:17,688 --> 00:03:19,288 >> I RAN INTO A GUY THE OTHER 131 00:03:19,288 --> 00:03:20,088 DAY. 132 00:03:20,088 --> 00:03:21,121 "JEN, HOW ARE YA? 133 00:03:21,121 --> 00:03:22,188 I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN 30 YEARS. 134 00:03:22,188 --> 00:03:23,454 WHERE ARE YOU LIVING NOW? 135 00:03:23,454 --> 00:03:25,188 YOU'RE STILL LIVING WITH YOUR 136 00:03:25,188 --> 00:03:26,221 MOTHER?" 137 00:03:26,221 --> 00:03:27,988 [laughter] 138 00:03:27,988 --> 00:03:29,121 >> JENNIFER STILL LIVES WITH HER 139 00:03:29,121 --> 00:03:30,521 PARENTS BECAUSE SHE'S AFRAID TO 140 00:03:30,521 --> 00:03:31,354 BE ALONE. 141 00:03:31,354 --> 00:03:33,888 SHE'S A 53-YEAR-OLD BABY. 142 00:03:33,888 --> 00:03:34,654 >> WHO DO YOU SLEEP WITH AT 143 00:03:34,654 --> 00:03:36,088 NIGHT? 144 00:03:36,088 --> 00:03:36,754 >> [laughs] 145 00:03:36,754 --> 00:03:37,721 >> I DON'T NEED SOMEONE IN THE 146 00:03:37,721 --> 00:03:38,388 BED. 147 00:03:38,388 --> 00:03:39,254 I NEED SOMEONE IN THE HOUSE. 148 00:03:39,254 --> 00:03:41,288 I'M AFRAID OF THE DARK. 149 00:03:41,288 --> 00:03:42,688 >> ARE YOU INSANE, JENNIFER? 150 00:03:42,688 --> 00:03:43,654 >> SHUT THE [bleep] UP. 151 00:03:43,654 --> 00:03:45,254 >> LINDA AND JEN ARE [bleep] 152 00:03:45,254 --> 00:03:47,688 NUTS, BUT THEY'RE THERE FOR YOU. 153 00:03:47,688 --> 00:03:49,221 THAT'S THE KIND OF PEOPLE I 154 00:03:49,221 --> 00:03:52,354 LIKE, WACKOS THAT ARE LOYAL. 155 00:03:52,354 --> 00:03:53,288 >> HERE'S TO THE OLD DAYS. 156 00:03:53,288 --> 00:03:56,288 CHEERS. 157 00:04:00,454 --> 00:04:02,288 >> MY BAR, THE DRUNKEN MONKEY, 158 00:04:02,288 --> 00:04:03,854 GOT A MAKEOVER. 159 00:04:03,854 --> 00:04:05,588 MY BROTHER-IN-LAW, DOM, DID IT. 160 00:04:05,588 --> 00:04:08,688 HE DID A FABULOUS JOB. 161 00:04:08,688 --> 00:04:09,921 HI, PORTIA. 162 00:04:09,921 --> 00:04:11,454 OH, I SEE YOU'RE SETTING UP THE 163 00:04:11,454 --> 00:04:12,454 BAR. 164 00:04:12,454 --> 00:04:16,121 >> YES, IT LOOKS BEAUTIFUL. 165 00:04:16,121 --> 00:04:17,554 >> THE BAR WAS GONNA BE FIVE 166 00:04:17,554 --> 00:04:18,488 YEARS OLD. 167 00:04:18,488 --> 00:04:19,488 YOU KNOW, A LOT OF WEAR AND 168 00:04:19,488 --> 00:04:20,588 TEAR. 169 00:04:20,588 --> 00:04:22,188 ALL THE DERELICT CUSTOMERS I'VE 170 00:04:22,188 --> 00:04:23,988 HAD THROUGH THE PAST FIVE YEARS, 171 00:04:23,988 --> 00:04:25,354 TRUST ME, IT NEEDED IT. 172 00:04:25,354 --> 00:04:27,121 I'M HOPING THIS RENOVATION 173 00:04:27,121 --> 00:04:29,221 BRINGS PEOPLE FROM OUT OF THE 174 00:04:29,221 --> 00:04:29,921 NEIGHBORHOOD. 175 00:04:29,921 --> 00:04:31,754 I NEED A YOUNGER CLIENTELE TO 176 00:04:31,754 --> 00:04:33,888 TAKE THIS BAR TO THE TOP. 177 00:04:33,888 --> 00:04:34,954 >> WHAT'S UP? 178 00:04:34,954 --> 00:04:37,088 >> AJ IS MY BABY BOY. 179 00:04:37,088 --> 00:04:39,821 HE'S VERY HANDSOME AND SUAVE. 180 00:04:39,821 --> 00:04:40,721 >> WOW. 181 00:04:40,721 --> 00:04:41,388 >> I LIKE IT. 182 00:04:41,388 --> 00:04:43,088 >> IT CAME OUT REALLY NICE. 183 00:04:43,088 --> 00:04:44,288 >> THIS IS, LIKE, THE NICEST BAR 184 00:04:44,288 --> 00:04:45,354 IN STATEN ISLAND. 185 00:04:45,354 --> 00:04:46,488 ALL RIGHT--OH, LOOK, IT'S 186 00:04:46,488 --> 00:04:47,621 UNCLE DOM. 187 00:04:47,621 --> 00:04:48,821 DOM, I CAN'T BELIEVE WHAT YOU 188 00:04:48,821 --> 00:04:49,521 DID. 189 00:04:49,521 --> 00:04:52,688 I CAN'T BELIEVE THE BAR. 190 00:04:52,688 --> 00:04:53,554 >> OH, YOU DIDN'T DO THE MEN'S 191 00:04:53,554 --> 00:04:54,221 ROOM THOUGH? 192 00:04:54,221 --> 00:04:54,954 >> NAH. 193 00:04:54,954 --> 00:04:57,354 THE GUYS JUST PEE ON THE FLOOR. 194 00:04:57,354 --> 00:04:59,688 THE LADIES RULE. 195 00:04:59,688 --> 00:05:01,121 WE GOTTA HAVE THE BEST GRAND 196 00:05:01,121 --> 00:05:01,788 OPENING. 197 00:05:01,788 --> 00:05:02,554 >> YEAH. 198 00:05:02,554 --> 00:05:03,788 >> I WANT A RE-GRAND OPENING 199 00:05:03,788 --> 00:05:06,954 PARTY--HUGE, THE BEST. 200 00:05:06,954 --> 00:05:08,321 I HAVE TO BLOW THE BAR UP. 201 00:05:08,321 --> 00:05:10,121 WE GOTTA DO SOME CRAZY THING. 202 00:05:10,121 --> 00:05:11,554 >> YOU GOTTA GET GIRLS, HAVE 203 00:05:11,554 --> 00:05:12,854 THEM WALKING AROUND SERVING 204 00:05:12,854 --> 00:05:14,388 DRINKS WITH TRAYS AND STUFF. 205 00:05:14,388 --> 00:05:16,388 >> OOH, THAT'S HOT. 206 00:05:16,388 --> 00:05:18,254 IF THIS BAR DON'T GET ON THE MAP 207 00:05:18,254 --> 00:05:21,788 NOW, I HAVE TO MOVE ON. 208 00:05:21,788 --> 00:05:23,988 I HAVE TO GET THIS BAR PACKED 209 00:05:23,988 --> 00:05:25,188 OUT EVERY NIGHT, LINES AROUND 210 00:05:25,188 --> 00:05:25,921 THE BLOCK. 211 00:05:25,921 --> 00:05:27,621 I WANT DRUNKEN MONKEYS AROUND 212 00:05:27,621 --> 00:05:28,388 THE WORLD. 213 00:05:28,388 --> 00:05:30,488 I COULD JUST PICTURE IT. 214 00:05:30,488 --> 00:05:32,854 DRUNKEN MONKEYS EVERYWHERE--AND 215 00:05:32,854 --> 00:05:35,254 BROOKLYN. 216 00:05:41,154 --> 00:05:42,088 >> WHAT ABOUT THE BILLS? 217 00:05:42,088 --> 00:05:43,154 DID YOU PAY THE CON ED? 218 00:05:43,154 --> 00:05:44,754 >> OH, I ACTUALLY DID IT. 219 00:05:44,754 --> 00:05:45,654 >> YOU DID? 220 00:05:45,654 --> 00:05:46,821 >> YUP, I'M PROUD. 221 00:05:46,821 --> 00:05:48,088 >> THE ACCOUNTANT WANTS TO MEET 222 00:05:48,088 --> 00:05:49,588 YOU. 223 00:05:49,588 --> 00:05:50,721 AND YOU CAN'T DO WHAT YOU DID TO 224 00:05:50,721 --> 00:05:52,554 HIM THE LAST TIME AND NOT SHOW 225 00:05:52,554 --> 00:05:54,121 UP AND GO OUT TO DRINK WITH YOUR 226 00:05:54,121 --> 00:05:55,454 FRIENDS. 227 00:05:55,454 --> 00:05:57,688 >> MY SISTER, JANINE, IS SIX 228 00:05:57,688 --> 00:05:58,854 YEARS YOUNGER THAN ME. 229 00:05:58,854 --> 00:06:00,454 SHE LIVES IN A [bleep] HUGE 230 00:06:00,454 --> 00:06:02,588 MANSION, AND SHE THINKS THAT 231 00:06:02,588 --> 00:06:03,821 SHE'S MY MOTHER. 232 00:06:03,821 --> 00:06:04,921 >> DID YOU GO TO THE DOCTOR? 233 00:06:04,921 --> 00:06:05,654 >> NO. 234 00:06:05,654 --> 00:06:07,121 >> THE NEXT TIME YOU CALL ME AT 235 00:06:07,121 --> 00:06:08,188 5:00 IN THE MORNING THAT YOU'RE 236 00:06:08,188 --> 00:06:09,488 HAVING A HEART ATTACK THEN, 237 00:06:09,488 --> 00:06:11,821 [bleep] DIE. 238 00:06:11,821 --> 00:06:12,788 DID YOU PAY THE RENT? 239 00:06:12,788 --> 00:06:14,121 >> YES, OF COURSE. 240 00:06:14,121 --> 00:06:15,788 JANINE IS ALL BUSINESS. 241 00:06:15,788 --> 00:06:17,488 SHE KNOWS EVERYTHING AND HOW TO 242 00:06:17,488 --> 00:06:18,488 GO ABOUT IT. 243 00:06:18,488 --> 00:06:20,454 DID YOU EVEN SEE THE BAR? 244 00:06:20,454 --> 00:06:21,521 >> NO, I HAVEN'T. 245 00:06:21,521 --> 00:06:23,388 >> IT IS [bleep] AMAZING. 246 00:06:23,388 --> 00:06:24,921 WE HAVE TO PLAN A RE-GRAND 247 00:06:24,921 --> 00:06:27,288 OPENING OF THE HOTTEST CLUB ON 248 00:06:27,288 --> 00:06:28,321 STATEN ISLAND. 249 00:06:28,321 --> 00:06:29,654 >> THAT'S GREAT. 250 00:06:29,654 --> 00:06:32,421 THAT REALLY SOUNDS LIKE FUN. 251 00:06:32,421 --> 00:06:33,621 SO LET'S GET IT TOGETHER. 252 00:06:33,621 --> 00:06:34,388 WHAT DO WE NEED? 253 00:06:34,388 --> 00:06:35,588 >> AJ THINKS THAT I SHOULD HAVE 254 00:06:35,588 --> 00:06:37,454 HOT SHOT GIRLS. 255 00:06:37,454 --> 00:06:38,221 FORGET THAT. 256 00:06:38,221 --> 00:06:41,654 WE SHOULD GET HOT GUYS. 257 00:06:41,654 --> 00:06:42,721 >> SOUNDS GOOD. 258 00:06:42,721 --> 00:06:45,921 >> THEY GOTTA BE DIESEL. 259 00:06:45,921 --> 00:06:48,188 THEY GOTTA HAVE THE SIX PACK, 260 00:06:48,188 --> 00:06:49,088 THE NICE PECS. 261 00:06:49,088 --> 00:06:50,154 >> WE'LL DO A CASTING CALL. 262 00:06:50,154 --> 00:06:51,388 >> HOW DO I DO THAT? 263 00:06:51,388 --> 00:06:52,621 >> PUT IT ALL OVER THE INTERNET, 264 00:06:52,621 --> 00:06:53,421 AND IF YOU WANT THEM, YOU HIRE 265 00:06:53,421 --> 00:06:54,088 THEM. 266 00:06:54,088 --> 00:06:55,688 BUT YOU HAVE TO HIRE ONLY A FEW, 267 00:06:55,688 --> 00:06:57,354 'CAUSE YOU WILL HIRE EVERYBODY, 268 00:06:57,354 --> 00:07:00,121 AND PAY EVERYBODY, AND BE BROKE. 269 00:07:00,121 --> 00:07:01,321 ALL RIGHT, SO FOUR. 270 00:07:01,321 --> 00:07:02,788 DONE. 271 00:07:02,788 --> 00:07:04,188 >> OH, I'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO 272 00:07:04,188 --> 00:07:05,921 PICK FOUR GUYS. 273 00:07:05,921 --> 00:07:06,788 WHERE'S THESE GUYS? 274 00:07:06,788 --> 00:07:07,921 I'M VERY EXCITED. 275 00:07:07,921 --> 00:07:09,588 MOVE THOSE--OOH, LOOK AT THAT. 276 00:07:09,588 --> 00:07:11,154 OOH, WALLY. 277 00:07:11,154 --> 00:07:12,221 TONIGHT, I HAVE A DATE WITH 278 00:07:12,221 --> 00:07:15,454 NEIL, MY SO-CALLED "HUSBAND." 279 00:07:15,454 --> 00:07:17,454 EXCUSE ME? 280 00:07:17,454 --> 00:07:18,521 >> GO, DRUNKEN! 281 00:07:18,521 --> 00:07:19,654 >> THIS IS GONNA BE [bleep] 282 00:07:19,654 --> 00:07:20,688 NUTS. 283 00:07:20,688 --> 00:07:22,188 >> COME ON, DRUNKEN. 284 00:07:22,188 --> 00:07:25,188 I'M COMING UP THERE, BABY. 285 00:07:36,554 --> 00:07:37,621 >> WHILE THE DRUNKEN MONKEY'S 286 00:07:37,621 --> 00:07:39,354 GETTING SOME LAST-MINUTE WORK 287 00:07:39,354 --> 00:07:41,354 DONE, WE'RE CASTING SOME GUYS 288 00:07:41,354 --> 00:07:43,254 FOR THE RE-GRAND OPENING. 289 00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:45,488 I WANT YOUNG, HOT GUYS. 290 00:07:45,488 --> 00:07:46,821 THEY'RE GONNA WORK IN THE BAR, 291 00:07:46,821 --> 00:07:48,221 BEING MY SHOT BOYS. 292 00:07:48,221 --> 00:07:50,088 THEY WALK AROUND WITH A TRAY AND 293 00:07:50,088 --> 00:07:51,788 SAY, "SHOT, $2." 294 00:07:51,788 --> 00:07:53,388 >> DID YOU SEE THAT CATTLE CALL 295 00:07:53,388 --> 00:07:54,521 OUT THERE? 296 00:07:54,521 --> 00:07:55,954 YOU KIDDING ME? 297 00:07:55,954 --> 00:07:57,454 >> A SHOT GUY HAS TO BE HOT, 298 00:07:57,454 --> 00:07:58,721 'CAUSE WHEN I'M OUT AND I SEE A 299 00:07:58,721 --> 00:08:00,754 HOT SHOT GUY, I GO, "OOH, COME 300 00:08:00,754 --> 00:08:01,754 HERE, MY BABY. 301 00:08:01,754 --> 00:08:02,954 GIVE ME ALL THE SHOTS." 302 00:08:02,954 --> 00:08:04,154 COME ON, WHERE'S THESE GUYS? 303 00:08:04,154 --> 00:08:05,421 I'M VERY EXCITED. 304 00:08:05,421 --> 00:08:06,121 I'M READY. 305 00:08:06,121 --> 00:08:07,254 >> IT'S SHOWTIME! 306 00:08:07,254 --> 00:08:08,154 >> LET'S GO. 307 00:08:08,154 --> 00:08:08,854 >> WHAT'S YOUR NAME? 308 00:08:08,854 --> 00:08:10,088 >> JOHNNY SALAMI HERE. 309 00:08:10,088 --> 00:08:13,521 >> OKAY, JOHNNY SALAMI. 310 00:08:13,521 --> 00:08:14,321 >> THE SALAMI'S BEAUTIFUL. 311 00:08:14,321 --> 00:08:15,088 IT'S GENOA. 312 00:08:15,088 --> 00:08:16,088 IT'S NICE, IT'S CLEAN. 313 00:08:16,088 --> 00:08:17,788 BEAUTIFUL, GORGEOUS--GORGEOUS! 314 00:08:17,788 --> 00:08:19,321 >> I CAN'T PICTURE YOU AS A SHOT 315 00:08:19,321 --> 00:08:20,188 BOY BECAUSE YOU'RE TOO CUTE. 316 00:08:20,188 --> 00:08:20,854 >> ME EITHER. 317 00:08:20,854 --> 00:08:22,088 NEXT. 318 00:08:22,088 --> 00:08:23,321 >> NOW, THIS IS WHAT I'M TALKING 319 00:08:23,321 --> 00:08:24,088 ABOUT. 320 00:08:24,088 --> 00:08:25,554 CUTE ONE POPS UP. 321 00:08:25,554 --> 00:08:26,521 >> TAKE YOUR SHIRT OFF. 322 00:08:26,521 --> 00:08:28,088 >> HE'S ADORABLE. 323 00:08:28,088 --> 00:08:29,754 OH, LORD. 324 00:08:29,754 --> 00:08:30,654 >> ALL RIGHT, HE'S IN. 325 00:08:30,654 --> 00:08:32,088 VERY YOUNG, VERY CUTE. 326 00:08:32,088 --> 00:08:33,354 YOU'RE HIRED. 327 00:08:33,354 --> 00:08:34,521 >> WHAT IS YOUR NAME? 328 00:08:34,521 --> 00:08:35,254 >> DAMIAN. 329 00:08:35,254 --> 00:08:36,521 WANNA SEE ME FLEX, OR TAKE MY 330 00:08:36,521 --> 00:08:37,888 SHIRT OFF, OR THE HAIR DOWN OR 331 00:08:37,888 --> 00:08:38,654 ANYTHING? 332 00:08:38,654 --> 00:08:39,488 >> I WANNA SEE! 333 00:08:39,488 --> 00:08:40,688 >> LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING. 334 00:08:40,688 --> 00:08:42,588 THAT'S ONE FINE PIECE OF MEAT. 335 00:08:42,588 --> 00:08:44,088 >> THANK YOU. 336 00:08:44,088 --> 00:08:45,088 OOH, LOOK AT THAT. 337 00:08:45,088 --> 00:08:46,688 MOVE THOSE PECS. 338 00:08:46,688 --> 00:08:47,421 HE'S CUTE. 339 00:08:47,421 --> 00:08:48,221 >> YOU ARE IN. 340 00:08:48,221 --> 00:08:49,088 WHAT'S YOUR NAME? 341 00:08:49,088 --> 00:08:50,221 >> WALLY. 342 00:08:50,221 --> 00:08:51,488 >> both: WALLY. 343 00:08:51,488 --> 00:08:52,554 >> OOH, WALLY. 344 00:08:52,554 --> 00:08:53,554 >> VERY NICE, WALLY. 345 00:08:53,554 --> 00:08:54,254 >> WALLY'S CUTE. 346 00:08:54,254 --> 00:08:55,454 LOOK AT HIS NICE SMILE. 347 00:08:55,454 --> 00:08:58,688 WALLY, YOU'RE HIRED. 348 00:08:58,688 --> 00:08:59,921 >> NEXT. 349 00:08:59,921 --> 00:09:00,788 >> HE'S CUTE. 350 00:09:00,788 --> 00:09:03,454 >> HELLO, LITTLE SWEETHEART. 351 00:09:03,454 --> 00:09:04,521 >> WHAT'S YOUR NAME? 352 00:09:04,521 --> 00:09:05,521 >> MY NAME IS RICARDO. 353 00:09:05,521 --> 00:09:06,454 >> WOULD YOU TAKE YOUR SHIRT 354 00:09:06,454 --> 00:09:07,154 OFF? 355 00:09:07,154 --> 00:09:08,121 >> YES, I WOULD. 356 00:09:08,121 --> 00:09:09,888 >> WELL, THEN LET'S GO. 357 00:09:09,888 --> 00:09:11,954 >> RICARDO'S GOT SWAG. 358 00:09:11,954 --> 00:09:13,788 >> 7:30, WE'RE GONNA CALL YOU. 359 00:09:13,788 --> 00:09:14,788 YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHERE THE 360 00:09:14,788 --> 00:09:15,621 DRUNKEN MON--? 361 00:09:15,621 --> 00:09:16,754 YOU'RE FROM THE BRONX? 362 00:09:16,754 --> 00:09:17,454 >> YEAH. 363 00:09:17,454 --> 00:09:19,354 >> RICARDO, YOU'RE MY LITTLE HOT 364 00:09:19,354 --> 00:09:21,921 LATIN LOVER. 365 00:09:21,921 --> 00:09:23,288 >> GIVE MOMMY A LITTLE HUG. 366 00:09:23,288 --> 00:09:24,088 >> HE'S 21, LINDA, OKAY? 367 00:09:24,088 --> 00:09:24,988 >> I DON'T CARE. 368 00:09:24,988 --> 00:09:26,488 I'M A COUGAR, BABY. 369 00:09:26,488 --> 00:09:27,221 I LOVE HIM. 370 00:09:27,221 --> 00:09:28,288 >> BYE, BABY. 371 00:09:28,288 --> 00:09:30,854 >> CASTING CALL IS OVER. 372 00:09:30,854 --> 00:09:33,288 >> I COULD DO THIS FOR A CAREER. 373 00:09:33,288 --> 00:09:35,188 I FOUND GREAT GUYS. 374 00:09:35,188 --> 00:09:36,988 HOT GUYS ATTRACT A LOT OF HOT- 375 00:09:36,988 --> 00:09:38,521 LOOKING PEOPLE. 376 00:09:38,521 --> 00:09:40,521 CHA-CHING, CHA-CHING, CHA-CHING. 377 00:09:40,521 --> 00:09:42,088 I HAD THE BEST TIME I HAD IN 378 00:09:42,088 --> 00:09:42,788 A WHILE. 379 00:09:42,788 --> 00:09:45,721 >> I HAD FUN. 380 00:09:50,388 --> 00:09:51,654 >> TONIGHT, I HAVE A DATE WITH 381 00:09:51,654 --> 00:09:52,654 NEIL. 382 00:09:52,654 --> 00:09:56,321 NEIL IS MY SO-CALLED "HUSBAND." 383 00:09:56,321 --> 00:09:57,621 WE'VE BEEN MARRIED FOR THREE 384 00:09:57,621 --> 00:10:01,088 YEARS AND IT'S TOTAL DISASTER. 385 00:10:01,088 --> 00:10:01,754 >> ENJOY, CHEERS. 386 00:10:01,754 --> 00:10:02,521 >> THANK YOU. 387 00:10:02,521 --> 00:10:04,654 SO WE'RE LIVING APART RIGHT NOW, 388 00:10:04,654 --> 00:10:07,354 AND I LIKE IT LIKE THAT, BUT WE 389 00:10:07,354 --> 00:10:08,421 STILL GET TOGETHER ONCE IN A 390 00:10:08,421 --> 00:10:09,121 WHILE. 391 00:10:09,121 --> 00:10:11,054 YOU KNOW, AFTER ALL, HE IS MY 392 00:10:11,054 --> 00:10:13,988 HUSBAND. 393 00:10:15,688 --> 00:10:17,521 WHAT'S DOING? 394 00:10:17,521 --> 00:10:18,654 >> NOTHING, JUST BEHAVING 395 00:10:18,654 --> 00:10:20,721 MYSELF. 396 00:10:20,721 --> 00:10:22,088 >> I KICKED NEIL OUT SEVEN 397 00:10:22,088 --> 00:10:23,688 MONTHS AGO 'CAUSE HE WAS A 398 00:10:23,688 --> 00:10:25,288 CHEATER, STAYIN' OUT ALL NIGHT 399 00:10:25,288 --> 00:10:26,688 DRUNK. 400 00:10:26,688 --> 00:10:28,121 I THOUGHT DATING WISE GUYS WAS 401 00:10:28,121 --> 00:10:30,188 TROUBLE, BUT TRUST ME, IT WASN'T 402 00:10:30,188 --> 00:10:31,754 AS MUCH TROUBLE AS BEING MARRIED 403 00:10:31,754 --> 00:10:33,588 TO A SANITATION WORKER. 404 00:10:33,588 --> 00:10:36,454 HOW IS IT AT YOUR MOM'S HOUSE? 405 00:10:36,454 --> 00:10:38,054 >> IT'S ALL RIGHT, BEING 38, 406 00:10:38,054 --> 00:10:38,821 BACK AT YOUR MOM'S HOUSE. 407 00:10:38,821 --> 00:10:40,354 HOW DO YOU THINK IT IS? 408 00:10:40,354 --> 00:10:42,121 >> [laughs] 409 00:10:42,121 --> 00:10:43,221 >> I SCREWED UP A LOT OF THINGS, 410 00:10:43,221 --> 00:10:44,121 AND I'M GONNA CHANGE A LOT OF 411 00:10:44,121 --> 00:10:45,821 THINGS. 412 00:10:45,821 --> 00:10:47,054 >> ME AND NEIL ARE TRYING TO 413 00:10:47,054 --> 00:10:47,954 WORK THINGS OUT. 414 00:10:47,954 --> 00:10:50,588 HE'S TRYING TO CLEAN UP HIS ACT. 415 00:10:50,588 --> 00:10:51,588 >> IT'S ACTUALLY NICE GETTING UP 416 00:10:51,588 --> 00:10:52,354 IN THE MORNING WITHOUT THE 417 00:10:52,354 --> 00:10:53,054 HANGOVER. 418 00:10:53,054 --> 00:10:53,954 >> THAT'S A GOOD THING YOU 419 00:10:53,954 --> 00:10:55,054 DON'T DRINK. 420 00:10:55,054 --> 00:10:56,154 I HAVE TO HAVE A HANGOVER AT 421 00:10:56,154 --> 00:10:57,388 LEAST ONCE A WEEK. 422 00:10:57,388 --> 00:10:58,454 >> WATER FOR THE TABLE? 423 00:10:58,454 --> 00:11:00,888 >> OH, WATER IS FOR FISH. 424 00:11:00,888 --> 00:11:03,088 I DRINK THIS. 425 00:11:03,088 --> 00:11:04,621 LISTEN, SOMETIMES I MIGHT BE A 426 00:11:04,621 --> 00:11:06,588 LITTLE HARD ON NEIL, BUT IT WAS 427 00:11:06,588 --> 00:11:08,088 NO JOKE TRYING TO PUT UP WITH 428 00:11:08,088 --> 00:11:09,421 HIM FOR THE PAST FOUR YEARS. 429 00:11:09,421 --> 00:11:12,088 MARRIAGE, I DON'T NEED TO HAVE 430 00:11:12,088 --> 00:11:13,088 IT. 431 00:11:13,088 --> 00:11:17,088 >> NO, IT'S GOOD TO HAVE IT. 432 00:11:17,088 --> 00:11:19,254 >> WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? 433 00:11:19,254 --> 00:11:22,088 >> [clears throat] 434 00:11:22,088 --> 00:11:22,921 I THINK I'M READY TO MOVE BACK 435 00:11:22,921 --> 00:11:24,554 IN. 436 00:11:24,554 --> 00:11:27,688 >> EXCUSE ME? 437 00:11:27,688 --> 00:11:29,388 OOH, HE CAUGHT ME OFF GUARD 438 00:11:29,388 --> 00:11:30,554 WITH THAT ONE. 439 00:11:30,554 --> 00:11:31,354 >> I THINK YOU'LL LIKE THE NEW 440 00:11:31,354 --> 00:11:32,254 ME. 441 00:11:32,254 --> 00:11:34,354 I ACTUALLY GOT A BANK ACCOUNT, 442 00:11:34,354 --> 00:11:36,454 GOT A NEW TRUCK. 443 00:11:36,454 --> 00:11:38,121 I THINK I'M READY TO COME BACK. 444 00:11:38,121 --> 00:11:39,088 >> YOU THINK YOU'RE ALL SLICK 445 00:11:39,088 --> 00:11:41,254 'CAUSE YOU'RE 38, 39, WHATEVER 446 00:11:41,254 --> 00:11:41,954 THE [bleep]-- 447 00:11:41,954 --> 00:11:44,221 >> 38. 448 00:11:44,221 --> 00:11:45,421 [laughs] 449 00:11:45,421 --> 00:11:46,521 YEAH, WELL, YOU ACT LIKE YOU'RE 450 00:11:46,521 --> 00:11:48,088 28. 451 00:11:48,088 --> 00:11:48,721 >> [laughs] 452 00:11:48,721 --> 00:11:50,088 >> NO? 453 00:11:50,088 --> 00:11:51,521 >> OKAY. 454 00:11:58,821 --> 00:11:59,654 >> HEY. 455 00:11:59,654 --> 00:12:00,988 >> HI, MY BABY. 456 00:12:00,988 --> 00:12:03,221 >> WHO'S THAT? 457 00:12:03,221 --> 00:12:04,854 >> HELLO, MY BABY. 458 00:12:04,854 --> 00:12:06,321 MOMMY'S HERE. 459 00:12:06,321 --> 00:12:07,221 >> YOU HAVE TO GET THEM RILED 460 00:12:07,221 --> 00:12:08,121 UP, RIGHT? 461 00:12:08,121 --> 00:12:09,521 >> WHO'S MY BABY? 462 00:12:09,521 --> 00:12:10,554 >> HOLD ON, LET ME PUT THEM 463 00:12:10,554 --> 00:12:11,554 OUTSIDE. 464 00:12:11,554 --> 00:12:13,321 [dog whimpering] 465 00:12:13,321 --> 00:12:14,388 [dog growls] 466 00:12:14,388 --> 00:12:15,854 >> [laughs] 467 00:12:15,854 --> 00:12:16,621 >> I KNOW YOU DON'T WANNA GO 468 00:12:16,621 --> 00:12:17,321 OUT. 469 00:12:17,321 --> 00:12:18,521 YOU GOTTA, IT'S BEAUTIFUL. 470 00:12:18,521 --> 00:12:19,654 >> I GO TO AJ'S HOUSE EVERY 471 00:12:19,654 --> 00:12:20,354 WEEK. 472 00:12:20,354 --> 00:12:21,254 I HAVE TO CHECK UP ON 473 00:12:21,254 --> 00:12:22,754 EVERYTHING, BECAUSE HE'S ALWAYS 474 00:12:22,754 --> 00:12:25,421 GETTING INTO SOME MESS. 475 00:12:25,421 --> 00:12:26,521 >> LET ME GIVE YOU THIS BAG OF 476 00:12:26,521 --> 00:12:28,721 LAUNDRY. 477 00:12:28,721 --> 00:12:29,554 >> 'CAUSE I DON'T DO ENOUGH 478 00:12:29,554 --> 00:12:31,621 [bleep] LAUNDRY. 479 00:12:31,621 --> 00:12:32,854 >> IT'S JUST A COUPLE OF THINGS. 480 00:12:32,854 --> 00:12:33,654 >> ALL I DO IS LAUNDRY. 481 00:12:33,654 --> 00:12:34,754 I CAN'T TAKE IT. 482 00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:36,221 I'M SICK OF LAUNDRY. 483 00:12:36,221 --> 00:12:38,288 >> OH, TELL ME ABOUT IT. 484 00:12:38,288 --> 00:12:39,454 OH, MY GOD. 485 00:12:39,454 --> 00:12:40,588 I SIT HERE ALL DAY, CLEAN, 486 00:12:40,588 --> 00:12:41,254 SWEEP. 487 00:12:41,254 --> 00:12:42,388 THE HAIR ALL OVER THE [bleep] 488 00:12:42,388 --> 00:12:44,088 PLACE. 489 00:12:44,088 --> 00:12:45,654 >> SO ANYWAY, I WENT OUT WITH 490 00:12:45,654 --> 00:12:47,088 NEIL TO DINNER. 491 00:12:47,088 --> 00:12:47,888 >> HOW'D EVERYTHING GO? 492 00:12:47,888 --> 00:12:49,388 >> HE WANTS TO MOVE BACK IN. 493 00:12:49,388 --> 00:12:50,954 I FEEL LIKE NEIL IS JUST RUSHING 494 00:12:50,954 --> 00:12:52,254 INTO THINGS SO FAST. 495 00:12:52,254 --> 00:12:54,554 >> WELL, IT'S YOUR HUSBAND. 496 00:12:54,554 --> 00:12:56,454 >> AJ LOVES TO GIVE ME ADVICE, 497 00:12:56,454 --> 00:12:57,521 BUT I THINK HE SHOULD GIVE 498 00:12:57,521 --> 00:12:59,688 HIMSELF SOME OF HIS OWN ADVICE. 499 00:12:59,688 --> 00:13:01,821 I THINK THAT MAYBE YOU COME HOME 500 00:13:01,821 --> 00:13:04,921 AND WE'LL BE ONE HAPPY FAMILY. 501 00:13:04,921 --> 00:13:06,654 MY SON IS TOO YOUNG TO BE LIVING 502 00:13:06,654 --> 00:13:07,421 ALONE. 503 00:13:07,421 --> 00:13:09,154 HE'S BEEN LIVING ALONE FOR TWO 504 00:13:09,154 --> 00:13:09,954 YEARS. 505 00:13:09,954 --> 00:13:11,321 MY SON SHOULD LIVE AT HOME. 506 00:13:11,321 --> 00:13:12,688 HE NEEDS TO BE WHERE HE BELONGS, 507 00:13:12,688 --> 00:13:14,188 WITH MAMA. 508 00:13:14,188 --> 00:13:15,088 YOU WERE A BACHELOR. 509 00:13:15,088 --> 00:13:16,088 YOU HAD YOUR OWN PLACE. 510 00:13:16,088 --> 00:13:16,788 OVER, DONE. 511 00:13:16,788 --> 00:13:17,521 YOU TRIED IT. 512 00:13:17,521 --> 00:13:18,688 DIDN'T WORK OUT. 513 00:13:18,688 --> 00:13:19,854 >> WHY DIDN'T IT WORK OUT? 514 00:13:19,854 --> 00:13:20,954 IT'S WORKING OUT FINE. 515 00:13:20,954 --> 00:13:21,821 >> YOU'RE 23. 516 00:13:21,821 --> 00:13:22,788 YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT 517 00:13:22,788 --> 00:13:24,221 CLEANING AND SWEEPING THE HOUSE. 518 00:13:24,221 --> 00:13:25,788 YOU HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT WORKING 519 00:13:25,788 --> 00:13:27,888 AND BUYING DESIGNER CLOTHES. 520 00:13:27,888 --> 00:13:29,688 >> I HAVE DESIGNER CLOTHES. 521 00:13:29,688 --> 00:13:30,621 >> BUY MORE OF THEM. 522 00:13:30,621 --> 00:13:33,621 >> YEAH, ALL RIGHT. 523 00:13:33,621 --> 00:13:34,454 >> DRUNKEN MONKEY, MAKE SOME 524 00:13:34,454 --> 00:13:36,488 NOISE! 525 00:13:36,488 --> 00:13:38,688 >> YEAH! 526 00:13:38,688 --> 00:13:40,088 WHEN I SEE THESE HOT GUYS ON 527 00:13:40,088 --> 00:13:41,254 THE BAR DANCING, I'M LIKE, 528 00:13:41,254 --> 00:13:44,088 "OOH, WHO'S YOUR MOMMY?" 529 00:13:44,088 --> 00:13:46,221 >> YOUR HUSBAND'S HERE. 530 00:13:46,221 --> 00:13:49,221 >> NEIL! 531 00:13:58,988 --> 00:14:00,621 >> HI, NICOLE. 532 00:14:00,621 --> 00:14:02,488 >> HI, ANG, ARE YOU READY FOR 533 00:14:02,488 --> 00:14:03,321 YOUR SPRAY TAN? 534 00:14:03,321 --> 00:14:05,721 >> I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO IT. 535 00:14:05,721 --> 00:14:07,121 I LOVE BEING TAN. 536 00:14:07,121 --> 00:14:09,621 I JUST FEEL BETTER. 537 00:14:09,621 --> 00:14:11,121 I GOTTA LOOK HOT. 538 00:14:11,121 --> 00:14:12,888 TONIGHT IS THE RE-GRAND OPENING 539 00:14:12,888 --> 00:14:14,154 OF THE DRUNKEN MONKEY. 540 00:14:14,154 --> 00:14:14,821 [dog yips] 541 00:14:14,821 --> 00:14:17,821 I MUST HAVE A TAN. 542 00:14:19,688 --> 00:14:20,921 >> YEAH, BUT IT'S NATURAL. 543 00:14:20,921 --> 00:14:23,421 >> THIS IS MY HAWAIIAN TAN. 544 00:14:23,421 --> 00:14:25,621 THANK YOU, NICOLE. 545 00:14:25,621 --> 00:14:27,254 I'M SO EXCITED FOR EVERYBODY TO 546 00:14:27,254 --> 00:14:28,754 COME TO THE RE-GRAND OPENING OF 547 00:14:28,754 --> 00:14:30,521 THE MONKEY, 'CAUSE I CAN'T WAIT 548 00:14:30,521 --> 00:14:33,221 TO HEAR WHAT THEY'RE GONNA SAY. 549 00:14:35,521 --> 00:14:36,854 >> DRUNKEN MONKEY, LET ME HEAR 550 00:14:36,854 --> 00:14:38,654 YOU MAKE SOME NOISE! 551 00:14:38,654 --> 00:14:39,988 [cheers] 552 00:14:39,988 --> 00:14:40,988 [techno music] 553 00:14:40,988 --> 00:14:44,088 * 554 00:14:44,088 --> 00:14:46,121 >> EVERYBODY'S, LIKE, NEW FACES, 555 00:14:46,121 --> 00:14:47,088 YOUNGER CROWD. 556 00:14:47,088 --> 00:14:50,388 THIS IS THE KINDA CROWD I WANT. 557 00:14:50,388 --> 00:14:51,354 >> YOU LOOK AWESOME. 558 00:14:51,354 --> 00:14:54,321 >> LOOKING GOOD. 559 00:14:55,788 --> 00:14:56,788 >> IT'S A CHOCOLATE-COVERED 560 00:14:56,788 --> 00:14:57,488 BANANA. 561 00:14:57,488 --> 00:14:58,421 I'LL GIVE IT TO YOU FOR FREE. 562 00:14:58,421 --> 00:14:59,488 >> ANTHONY AND FRANKY ARE MY 563 00:14:59,488 --> 00:15:00,821 TWO BARTENDERS. 564 00:15:00,821 --> 00:15:05,088 THEY'RE VERY GOOD LOOKING. 565 00:15:05,088 --> 00:15:08,854 THEY'RE, LIKE, [bleep] PLAYERS. 566 00:15:08,854 --> 00:15:10,221 >> IF YOU GOT WORK TOMORROW AND 567 00:15:10,221 --> 00:15:11,554 YOU'RE CALLING IN SICK, LET ME 568 00:15:11,554 --> 00:15:12,821 HEAR YOU SAY, "YEAH!" 569 00:15:12,821 --> 00:15:14,088 [cheering] 570 00:15:14,088 --> 00:15:15,921 >> SHOTS, BABY, SHOTS. 571 00:15:15,921 --> 00:15:17,221 >> SEX ON THE BEACH. 572 00:15:17,221 --> 00:15:19,454 >> THE SHOT GUYS ARE SO HOT, AND 573 00:15:19,454 --> 00:15:21,421 ALL THE GIRLS FLOCK TOWARDS 574 00:15:21,421 --> 00:15:22,188 THEM. 575 00:15:22,188 --> 00:15:24,421 IT WAS THE BEST IDEA I EVER HAD. 576 00:15:24,421 --> 00:15:26,554 CHA-CHING, CHA-CHING. 577 00:15:26,554 --> 00:15:28,788 THAT'S THE WAY I WANNA ROLL ALL 578 00:15:28,788 --> 00:15:29,888 THE TIME. 579 00:15:29,888 --> 00:15:31,154 >> HECK, YEAH! 580 00:15:31,154 --> 00:15:32,221 YEAH! 581 00:15:32,221 --> 00:15:34,088 I WANNA GO ON THE BAR! 582 00:15:34,088 --> 00:15:36,154 [cheers] 583 00:15:36,154 --> 00:15:37,121 WHAT THE [bleep]? 584 00:15:37,121 --> 00:15:38,654 WHEN YOU GO ON THE BAR, THEY 585 00:15:38,654 --> 00:15:40,621 THROW [bleep] MONEY AT YOU AND 586 00:15:40,621 --> 00:15:41,888 YOU SHAKE IT UP AND DOWN. 587 00:15:41,888 --> 00:15:43,688 I LOVE DANCING ON THE BAR. 588 00:15:43,688 --> 00:15:44,454 >> OH! 589 00:15:44,454 --> 00:15:46,621 >> WE NEED SOME MORE SHOTS. 590 00:15:46,621 --> 00:15:47,621 [techno music] 591 00:15:47,621 --> 00:15:53,554 * 592 00:15:53,554 --> 00:15:55,421 >> EVERYBODY'S WHACKED OUT, 593 00:15:55,421 --> 00:15:58,354 HAVING A GOOD TIME. 594 00:15:58,354 --> 00:16:00,088 THIS IS A PERFECT TIME TO BRING 595 00:16:00,088 --> 00:16:01,921 OUT MY DRUNKEN MONKEY. 596 00:16:01,921 --> 00:16:03,421 >> DJ! 597 00:16:03,421 --> 00:16:07,321 >> all: [chanting] GO, DRUNKEN! 598 00:16:07,321 --> 00:16:11,721 [cheering] 599 00:16:11,721 --> 00:16:13,188 >> JUST SWING THAT BANANA. 600 00:16:13,188 --> 00:16:14,588 >> COME ON, DRUNKEN. 601 00:16:14,588 --> 00:16:17,588 >> I'M COMING UP THERE, BABY! 602 00:16:20,854 --> 00:16:23,088 [cheers] 603 00:16:26,588 --> 00:16:27,488 >> THIS IS GONNA BE [bleep] 604 00:16:27,488 --> 00:16:29,088 NUTS. 605 00:16:29,088 --> 00:16:31,654 >> YEAH! 606 00:16:31,654 --> 00:16:32,954 >> WHEN I SEE THESE HOT GUYS ON 607 00:16:32,954 --> 00:16:34,454 THE BAR DANCING, I'M LIKE, 608 00:16:34,454 --> 00:16:38,988 "OOH, WHO'S YOUR MOMMY?" 609 00:16:38,988 --> 00:16:40,854 >> I'M LIKE, "OVER HERE, OVER 610 00:16:40,854 --> 00:16:41,554 HERE." 611 00:16:41,554 --> 00:16:44,088 I GUIDE THEM RIGHT IN, BABY. 612 00:16:44,088 --> 00:16:46,454 [cheering] 613 00:16:46,454 --> 00:16:48,388 >> COME ON, LET'S GO, HOT MAN. 614 00:16:48,388 --> 00:16:53,488 >> MY GOD. 615 00:16:53,488 --> 00:16:56,254 OH, MY GOD, THEY'RE SO CUTE. 616 00:16:56,254 --> 00:16:58,288 I WANT THEM ALL. 617 00:16:58,288 --> 00:16:59,088 ALL RIGHT. 618 00:16:59,088 --> 00:17:03,621 THE WINNER IS... 619 00:17:03,621 --> 00:17:04,921 RICARDO, FROM THE BRONX! 620 00:17:04,921 --> 00:17:08,154 [cheering] 621 00:17:08,154 --> 00:17:11,354 RICARDO, YOU'RE WITH ME. 622 00:17:11,354 --> 00:17:13,788 MY LITTLE SEXY, SPANISH, LATIN 623 00:17:13,788 --> 00:17:16,954 DANCER. 624 00:17:16,954 --> 00:17:20,088 >> YOUR HUSBAND'S HERE. 625 00:17:20,088 --> 00:17:22,488 >> NEIL! 626 00:17:22,488 --> 00:17:24,088 >> EXCUSE ME? 627 00:17:24,088 --> 00:17:32,088 ** 628 00:17:33,888 --> 00:17:35,388 HAVE I GOT SOMETHING TO TELL 629 00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:36,088 YOUS. 630 00:17:36,088 --> 00:17:37,521 >> WHAT HAPPENED? 631 00:17:37,521 --> 00:17:38,554 >> I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF I WANNA 632 00:17:38,554 --> 00:17:41,521 SAY IT. 633 00:17:43,688 --> 00:17:51,621 HAVEN'T HAD YOUR FILL OF 634 00:17:51,621 --> 00:17:52,921 >> I GOTTA TELL YOU, THIS WAS 635 00:17:52,921 --> 00:17:53,921 THE BEST NIGHT. 636 00:17:53,921 --> 00:17:54,788 >> IT REALLY WAS GREAT. 637 00:17:54,788 --> 00:17:55,488 >> I REALLY HAD A GOOD TIME. 638 00:17:55,488 --> 00:17:56,221 >> I HAD A GOOD TIME. 639 00:17:56,221 --> 00:17:56,988 >> IT WAS BEAUTIFUL. 640 00:17:56,988 --> 00:17:57,721 >> AND NOW I'LL GO HOME 641 00:17:57,721 --> 00:17:59,554 AND I'LL HAVE THE HUSBAND. 642 00:17:59,554 --> 00:18:01,788 WAIT A MINUTE--WAIT, WAIT. 643 00:18:01,788 --> 00:18:04,121 I HAVE A HUSBAND. 644 00:18:04,121 --> 00:18:05,088 >> A HUSBAND? 645 00:18:05,088 --> 00:18:07,288 WHO? 646 00:18:07,288 --> 00:18:07,954 >> NEIL! 647 00:18:07,954 --> 00:18:08,854 >> NEIL. 648 00:18:08,854 --> 00:18:10,121 >> ALL RIGHT, LISTEN TO THIS. 649 00:18:10,121 --> 00:18:10,821 >> GO AHEAD. 650 00:18:10,821 --> 00:18:12,321 >> HAVE I GOT SOMETHING TO TELL 651 00:18:12,321 --> 00:18:13,088 YOUS. 652 00:18:13,088 --> 00:18:16,654 >> WHAT HAPPENED? 653 00:18:16,654 --> 00:18:17,521 >> I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF I WANNA 654 00:18:17,521 --> 00:18:18,221 SAY IT. 655 00:18:18,221 --> 00:18:19,088 >> SAY IT. 656 00:18:19,088 --> 00:18:20,888 WHY? WHAT'S THE MATTER? 657 00:18:20,888 --> 00:18:22,588 >> I THINK I'M GONNA LET NEIL 658 00:18:22,588 --> 00:18:23,988 MOVE BACK IN. 659 00:18:23,988 --> 00:18:24,721 >> WELL, THEN WHAT HAPPENED? 660 00:18:24,721 --> 00:18:25,988 >> YOU ARE? 661 00:18:25,988 --> 00:18:26,788 >> SO--? 662 00:18:26,788 --> 00:18:28,288 >> I AM SO EXCITED. 663 00:18:28,288 --> 00:18:29,121 >> I'M GONNA TELL YOUS RIGHT 664 00:18:29,121 --> 00:18:29,788 NOW-- 665 00:18:29,788 --> 00:18:30,454 >> I LOVE NEIL. 666 00:18:30,454 --> 00:18:31,121 >> I LIKE IT TOO. 667 00:18:31,121 --> 00:18:31,821 >> SHUT UP, JENNIFER. 668 00:18:31,821 --> 00:18:32,654 >> I DON'T KNOW IF I'M MAKING 669 00:18:32,654 --> 00:18:33,554 A BIG MISTAKE. 670 00:18:33,554 --> 00:18:34,654 >> I'M NOT EVEN GONNA START WITH 671 00:18:34,654 --> 00:18:36,088 THIS SUBJECT AGAIN. 672 00:18:36,088 --> 00:18:36,788 >> LISTEN TO ME. 673 00:18:36,788 --> 00:18:37,654 >> WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH NEIL? 674 00:18:37,654 --> 00:18:38,354 >> BECAUSE OF WHAT HE PUT HER 675 00:18:38,354 --> 00:18:39,688 THROUGH, SHE HAS TO MAKE THE 676 00:18:39,688 --> 00:18:40,354 RIGHT DECISION. 677 00:18:40,354 --> 00:18:41,588 >> EXCUSE ME, HE MANNED UP TO 678 00:18:41,588 --> 00:18:42,354 GET HIM, RIGHT? 679 00:18:42,354 --> 00:18:43,121 >> HE DIDN'T MAN UP YET. 680 00:18:43,121 --> 00:18:44,288 >> LISTEN TO ME. 681 00:18:44,288 --> 00:18:45,421 >> HE'S LIKE ANOTHER BIG KID. 682 00:18:45,421 --> 00:18:46,121 >> LISTEN-- 683 00:18:46,121 --> 00:18:47,488 >> BUT SEE, [beep] A BIG KID. 684 00:18:47,488 --> 00:18:48,688 SHE NEEDS A MAN. 685 00:18:48,688 --> 00:18:50,354 >> I LOVE NEIL FOR HER. 686 00:18:50,354 --> 00:18:52,254 >> ALL RIGHT, I LIKE RICARDO 687 00:18:52,254 --> 00:18:52,954 THAT I MADE OUT WITH. 688 00:18:52,954 --> 00:18:53,688 >> RICARDO? 689 00:18:53,688 --> 00:18:54,588 HANG ON, THAT WAS MY MAN. 690 00:18:54,588 --> 00:18:55,788 >> ARE YOU KIDDING ME? 691 00:18:55,788 --> 00:18:57,088 >> SHUT UP! 692 00:18:57,088 --> 00:18:58,221 >> SHE'S TALKING. 693 00:18:58,221 --> 00:19:00,554 >> I'M TRYING TO [bleep] SPILL 694 00:19:00,554 --> 00:19:01,688 MY [bleep] HEART OUT. 695 00:19:01,688 --> 00:19:02,654 >> OH, OKAY. 696 00:19:02,654 --> 00:19:04,088 >> SHUT UP, JENNIFER! 697 00:19:04,088 --> 00:19:05,254 [laughter] 698 00:19:05,254 --> 00:19:07,621 >> LET ME RETRACT THIS. 699 00:19:07,621 --> 00:19:09,654 I ALWAYS MAKE DECISIONS WHEN I'M 700 00:19:09,654 --> 00:19:10,554 ON PATRON. 701 00:19:10,554 --> 00:19:11,254 I SHOULD SLEEP ON THIS. 702 00:19:11,254 --> 00:19:12,854 >> DOMINICK'S MY HUSBAND. 703 00:19:12,854 --> 00:19:13,721 >> WAKE UP IN THE MORNING, AND 704 00:19:13,721 --> 00:19:15,088 THEN JUST, LIKE-- 705 00:19:15,088 --> 00:19:16,288 >> I THINK I'LL SLEEP THE PATRON 706 00:19:16,288 --> 00:19:17,088 OFF... 707 00:19:17,088 --> 00:19:17,754 >> THAT'S WHAT I SAID. 708 00:19:17,754 --> 00:19:19,621 >> THEN I'LL THINK ABOUT IF I 709 00:19:19,621 --> 00:19:20,654 REALLY WANT NEIL. 710 00:19:20,654 --> 00:19:21,688 >> I SAY GO FOR IT. 711 00:19:21,688 --> 00:19:22,388 WHAT THE [bleep]? 712 00:19:22,388 --> 00:19:23,821 >> AAH! 713 00:19:23,821 --> 00:19:24,888 SHUT UP, JEN. 714 00:19:24,888 --> 00:19:26,154 >> SHUT UP, JENNIFER! 715 00:19:26,154 --> 00:19:28,088 [laughter] 716 00:19:30,621 --> 00:19:32,688 >> THIS SEASON ON BIG ANG... 717 00:19:32,688 --> 00:19:34,354 THIS HOUSE IS CLOSING IN ON ME. 718 00:19:34,354 --> 00:19:35,654 >> THAT'S A DISGRAZIE. 719 00:19:35,654 --> 00:19:36,688 >> I NEED BIG. 720 00:19:36,688 --> 00:19:38,388 BIG ANG,BIG HOUSE. 721 00:19:38,388 --> 00:19:40,621 THIS IS DEFINITELY THE PARTY 722 00:19:40,621 --> 00:19:42,521 PLACE FOR ME. 723 00:19:42,521 --> 00:19:43,788 BOY, HAVE I GOT SOMEBODY FOR 724 00:19:43,788 --> 00:19:44,521 YOU. 725 00:19:44,521 --> 00:19:46,388 SHE HAS BIG BOOBS AND SHE IS 726 00:19:46,388 --> 00:19:47,154 FUNNY. 727 00:19:47,154 --> 00:19:51,588 AND SHE'S ALSO 65 YEARS OLD. 728 00:19:51,588 --> 00:19:54,088 THE PARTY'S ON! 729 00:19:54,088 --> 00:19:54,821 >> [screams] 730 00:19:54,821 --> 00:19:55,521 >> AAH! 731 00:19:55,521 --> 00:19:56,388 >> OH, MY GOD. 732 00:19:56,388 --> 00:19:57,121 >> DO YOU GUYS HAVE ANY ATHLETIC 733 00:19:57,121 --> 00:19:57,821 BACKGROUND? 734 00:19:57,821 --> 00:19:58,788 >> YOU DON'T WANNA KNOW WHAT 735 00:19:58,788 --> 00:20:00,088 BALLS I PLAY WITH. 736 00:20:00,088 --> 00:20:02,188 MAYBE THIS SHOULD BE MY HOBBY. 737 00:20:02,188 --> 00:20:04,354 LET'S GO, TENNIS. 738 00:20:04,354 --> 00:20:05,321 >> WE'RE GONNA INSERT THE 739 00:20:05,321 --> 00:20:06,888 SPECULUM. 740 00:20:06,888 --> 00:20:07,788 >> THAT BIG THING? 741 00:20:07,788 --> 00:20:10,054 I DON'T THINK SO. 742 00:20:10,054 --> 00:20:11,088 LIVE IT UP! 743 00:20:11,088 --> 00:20:12,588 [cheering] 744 00:20:12,588 --> 00:20:14,121 >> AJ GOT ARRESTED? 745 00:20:14,121 --> 00:20:15,421 >> I'M DEFINITELY LOOKING AT 746 00:20:15,421 --> 00:20:18,454 JAIL TIME.