1 00:00:03,040 --> 00:00:05,076 KATE: I'M SO SORRY, OFFICER. 2 00:00:05,076 --> 00:00:06,451 SHE'S A NERVOUS FLYER, YOU KNOW? 3 00:00:06,451 --> 00:00:08,319 SHE PROBABLY JUST GRABBED THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT'S BUTT 4 00:00:08,319 --> 00:00:09,420 OUT OF FEAR. 5 00:00:09,420 --> 00:00:11,489 YEAH, FEAR THAT BUTT WAS GETTING AWAY. 6 00:00:11,489 --> 00:00:14,159 PLEASE THANK THE AIRLINE FOR NOT PRESSING CHARGES, 7 00:00:14,159 --> 00:00:15,961 AND THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE. 8 00:00:15,961 --> 00:00:17,730 OH. [ CHUCKLES ] KISS-ASS. 9 00:00:17,730 --> 00:00:20,733 YEAH, KEEPING PEOPLE OUT OF JAIL IS ONE OF MY MOST ANNOYING QUALITIES. 10 00:00:20,733 --> 00:00:23,836 OOH, YOU GOT A FEISTY ONE HERE, KATIE. YES, I DO. 11 00:00:23,836 --> 00:00:26,472 AND YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT THE GINGERS. MMM! 12 00:00:26,472 --> 00:00:30,009 I LOVES TO WALK THAT RED CARPET. OH... 13 00:00:30,009 --> 00:00:31,043 YEAH! [ LAUGHS ] OH! 14 00:00:31,043 --> 00:00:32,978 GET READY FOR SOME RAZZIN', PETE. 15 00:00:32,978 --> 00:00:35,180 I LOVE JOKES ABOUT MY CROTCH. [ CHUCKLES ] 16 00:00:35,180 --> 00:00:36,382 OH, KIDS, HEY. HEY. 17 00:00:36,382 --> 00:00:38,418 THIS IS MY MOM, CRICKET. [ GASPS ] 18 00:00:38,418 --> 00:00:41,221 COME HERE AND GIVE YOUR OLD CRICKET A KISS. WOW. I DIDN'T KNOW -- 19 00:00:41,221 --> 00:00:43,723 MWAH! OH, MY. [ CHUCKLES ] 20 00:00:43,723 --> 00:00:45,325 OH, AND THIS MUST BE WARREN. 21 00:00:45,325 --> 00:00:46,860 WHAT A SOFT FACE. 22 00:00:46,860 --> 00:00:47,761 THANK YOU. 23 00:00:47,761 --> 00:00:49,029 AND LOOK AT YOU! 24 00:00:49,029 --> 00:00:52,332 IT'S BERT, DRESSED LIKE AN ELDERLY MAN. 25 00:00:52,332 --> 00:00:54,100 OH! LOOK AT THE THREE OF YOU. 26 00:00:54,100 --> 00:00:55,869 OH, I'VE ALREADY GOT MY FAVORITE, 27 00:00:55,869 --> 00:00:56,803 AND IT'S BERT. 28 00:00:56,803 --> 00:00:58,505 OKAY, I GOT TO HIT THE CAN. 29 00:00:58,505 --> 00:01:00,440 THANKS. HAVE FUN. 30 00:01:00,440 --> 00:01:03,010 OKAY, GUYS, LET'S LOOK FOR MY CONSERVATIVE, ASEXUAL PARENTS. 31 00:01:03,010 --> 00:01:04,245 PETEY-BIRD! 32 00:01:04,245 --> 00:01:05,746 HEY! OH! 33 00:01:05,746 --> 00:01:08,282 PETE: HEY, POP. OH, BERT! HI, SWEETHEART. 34 00:01:08,282 --> 00:01:10,084 UH, AFRAID WE'VE GOT SOME BAD NEWS. 35 00:01:10,084 --> 00:01:11,419 UH, RIGHT OFF THE BAT, HUH? 36 00:01:11,419 --> 00:01:12,887 GREAT AUNT MARGARET DECIDED 37 00:01:12,887 --> 00:01:15,222 SHE COULDN'T FLY DOWN FOR THE WEDDING. 38 00:01:15,222 --> 00:01:18,492 UNDERSTANDABLE, SINCE SHE IS 108. KATE: THAT'S TOO BAD. 39 00:01:18,492 --> 00:01:20,294 I WAS REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO MEETING HER. 40 00:01:20,294 --> 00:01:22,296 I'VE HEARD SO MANY GREAT STORIES. GREAT LADY. 41 00:01:22,296 --> 00:01:24,332 PETE, YOUR FATHER NEEDS SOMETHING TO EAT. 42 00:01:24,332 --> 00:01:26,000 WOULD YOU ASK HIM WHAT HE WANTS? 43 00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:28,036 HEY, POP, WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR LUNCH? 44 00:01:28,036 --> 00:01:29,171 UH, I WAS THINKING STEAK. 45 00:01:29,171 --> 00:01:31,506 HE'S THINKING STEAK. STEAK SOUNDS NICE. 46 00:01:31,506 --> 00:01:34,076 STEAK SOUNDS GOOD? GUESS WHO GOT THE HANDICAP STALL? 47 00:01:34,076 --> 00:01:35,177 WHAT'S UP? [ CHUCKLES ] 48 00:01:35,177 --> 00:01:38,347 [ GASPS ] YOU MUST BE THE FRANCESES. 49 00:01:38,347 --> 00:01:40,082 OH, GET IN HERE. 50 00:01:40,082 --> 00:01:41,216 MWAH! 51 00:01:41,216 --> 00:01:43,852 YOU! GET OVER HERE. MWAH! 52 00:01:43,852 --> 00:01:44,986 WOW! 53 00:01:44,986 --> 00:01:46,121 GOSH, IT IS SO GREAT 54 00:01:46,121 --> 00:01:48,123 TO MEET THE PEOPLE WHO POOPED OUT THIS GUY. 55 00:01:48,123 --> 00:01:49,291 BEEN HERE 20 MINUTES -- 56 00:01:49,291 --> 00:01:51,126 HE ALREADY BAILED ME OUT OF JAIL. 57 00:01:51,126 --> 00:01:53,429 IT'S A GREAT STORY. I'LL TELL YOU IN THE CAR. 58 00:01:53,429 --> 00:01:55,064 OKAY. WE'LL GET THE LUGGAGE. 59 00:01:55,064 --> 00:01:57,233 OH, HELLO. 60 00:01:57,233 --> 00:01:59,435 NICE BUM. WHERE YA FROM? 61 00:01:59,435 --> 00:02:00,903 HA HA! DAD! 62 00:02:00,903 --> 00:02:03,373 NICE BUTT. WHERE DO YOU LIVE? [ CHUCKLES ] 63 00:02:03,373 --> 00:02:06,075 WELL, THE GOOD NEWS IS, YOUR MOM WILL FILL THE SILENCES 64 00:02:06,075 --> 00:02:07,977 LEFT BY MY PARENTS' LOVELESS MARRIAGE. 65 00:02:07,977 --> 00:02:10,146 UH, YEAH, SHE'LL DO A LOT MORE THAN THAT. 66 00:02:10,146 --> 00:02:12,382 BUT, HEY, WE'RE ALL HERE FOR OUR WEDDING. 67 00:02:12,382 --> 00:02:13,983 IT'S EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED. 68 00:02:13,983 --> 00:02:15,985 MM, YEAH, ME TOO. 69 00:02:15,985 --> 00:02:18,088 GO! GO, GO, GO! WHAT? WHAT? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 70 00:02:18,088 --> 00:02:19,923 DRUG-SNIFFING DOGS. THAT'S YOUR MOTHER'S LUGGAGE. 71 00:02:19,923 --> 00:02:22,359 GO. GO. GO. OH, RIGHT. GOOD CALL. 72 00:02:25,262 --> 00:02:28,298 ♪♪♪ 73 00:02:37,174 --> 00:02:39,843 OKAY. HERE WE ARE. 74 00:02:39,843 --> 00:02:42,012 OH, YOU KNOW WHAT, MOM, BEFORE I GIVE YOU THE TOUR, 75 00:02:42,012 --> 00:02:43,181 I JUST WANT TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING. 76 00:02:43,181 --> 00:02:44,449 OKAY. 77 00:02:44,449 --> 00:02:46,751 HOLD UP, PEOPLE! 78 00:02:46,751 --> 00:02:48,386 IS THIS A PANINI PRESS? 79 00:02:48,386 --> 00:02:49,854 SEE? HERE, MOM. YEAH. 80 00:02:49,854 --> 00:02:51,956 IT'S THE WEDDING FROM "THE MUPPETS TAKE MANHATTAN." 81 00:02:51,956 --> 00:02:54,459 IT'S SORT OF THE VIBE THAT I'M GOING FOR. [ MISS PIGGY SINGING INDISTINCTLY ] 82 00:02:54,459 --> 00:02:57,061 WHAT IS THIS -- LIKE 20 BOTTLES? 83 00:02:57,061 --> 00:02:58,263 MOM, WILL YOU STOP SNOOPING 84 00:02:58,263 --> 00:03:00,031 AND JUST FOCUS ON KERMIT FOR A SECOND? 85 00:03:00,031 --> 00:03:03,101 NO! I'M SO EXCITED FOR YOU! 86 00:03:03,101 --> 00:03:05,170 MY LITTLE GIRL DONE GOOD! 87 00:03:05,170 --> 00:03:08,274 BIG HOUSE, THREE KIDS, KEEPING IT TIGHT! 88 00:03:08,274 --> 00:03:09,141 YEAH. 89 00:03:09,141 --> 00:03:11,243 OH! I HAVE PRESENTS. 90 00:03:11,243 --> 00:03:14,113 I GOT A BUTTERFLY KNIFE FOR BERT... 91 00:03:14,113 --> 00:03:15,481 WHOA. UH... 92 00:03:15,481 --> 00:03:17,750 ...SOME CANADIAN PLAYBOYS FOR THE GENTLE ONE, 93 00:03:17,750 --> 00:03:19,952 AND FOR HILLARY... 94 00:03:19,952 --> 00:03:21,053 THANK YOU. 95 00:03:21,053 --> 00:03:23,889 YOU KNOW, MOM, THAT IS SO THOUGHTFUL OF YOU. 96 00:03:23,889 --> 00:03:25,458 UH, UH, IT'S JUST THAT HERE, 97 00:03:25,458 --> 00:03:28,327 THESE KIDS HAVE DIFFERENT RULES THAN I HAD GROWING UP, 98 00:03:28,327 --> 00:03:30,262 SO WE CAN'T, UM... NO. 99 00:03:30,262 --> 00:03:31,497 YEAH. 100 00:03:31,497 --> 00:03:33,099 OH, OKAY, WELL, I THOUGHT THAT THE GRANDMOTHER 101 00:03:33,099 --> 00:03:35,235 WAS SUPPOSED TO SPOIL THE GRANDCHILDREN, 102 00:03:35,235 --> 00:03:36,436 BUT APPARENTLY NOT. 103 00:03:36,436 --> 00:03:39,272 ALL RIGHT. WELL, NOW WE KNOW. 104 00:03:39,272 --> 00:03:42,843 NEXT TIME I VISIT, I'LL JUST BRING A LOAF OF WHEAT BREAD. 105 00:03:42,843 --> 00:03:44,010 WHERE THE BIDET? 106 00:03:45,312 --> 00:03:47,948 SO LOOKS LIKE YOU AND ME ARE GONNA BE BUNKING TOGETHER. 107 00:03:47,948 --> 00:03:49,182 AH, LUCKY ME. 108 00:03:49,182 --> 00:03:52,252 SO, UH, I GOT A NEW JOB -- 109 00:03:52,252 --> 00:03:53,854 PREFAB DECKS -- 110 00:03:53,854 --> 00:03:55,455 OVER WITH CARL WHEELER AND HIS SONS. 111 00:03:55,455 --> 00:03:59,026 YEAH, CONGRATULATIONS, BUT, POP, REMEMBER Y-YOU RETIRED? 112 00:03:59,026 --> 00:04:01,162 WELL, THAT'S THE THING ABOUT THAT. 113 00:04:01,162 --> 00:04:03,030 OOH, LET ME GUESS. MOM DOESN'T KNOW. 114 00:04:03,030 --> 00:04:06,934 OH, SHE'S GOT PLENTY TO THINK ABOUT, WHAT WITH... 115 00:04:06,934 --> 00:04:08,803 WHATEVER IT IS SHE DOES ALL DAY. 116 00:04:08,803 --> 00:04:12,139 DAD, WHAT DOES MOM THINK YOU DO ALL DAY? 117 00:04:12,139 --> 00:04:14,175 WELL, THE THING ABOUT THAT IS, 118 00:04:14,175 --> 00:04:16,477 I GET UP, PUT ON MY GOLF CLOTHES, 119 00:04:16,477 --> 00:04:18,813 HEAD TO WORK, SELL SOME DECKS, 120 00:04:18,813 --> 00:04:21,249 CHANGE BACK INTO GOLF CLOTHES... 121 00:04:21,249 --> 00:04:23,017 AND COME HOME. FOOLPROOF. 122 00:04:23,017 --> 00:04:25,320 HILLARY: MEG, GOOD. YOU'RE HERE. 123 00:04:25,320 --> 00:04:29,024 OKAY. SO, WE NEED THE VOTIVES, STEMWARE, CENTERPIECES -- SETTLE DOWN, BARFA STEWART. 124 00:04:29,024 --> 00:04:31,860 YOU'RE IN CHARGE OF THE BORING STUFF. WELL, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 125 00:04:31,860 --> 00:04:34,329 OH, I GOT SOME NAUGHTY CUPCAKES FOR THE WEDDING NIGHT. 126 00:04:34,329 --> 00:04:36,265 WHERE CAN I PUT THEM? UH, NOT THERE. 127 00:04:36,265 --> 00:04:38,267 THE FRIDGE IS FILLED WITH FOOD FOR THE REHEARSAL DINNER. 128 00:04:38,267 --> 00:04:40,168 UGH, WHO REFRIGERATES SHRIMP? 129 00:04:40,168 --> 00:04:41,904 [ SIGHS ] MEG, PLEASE. 130 00:04:41,904 --> 00:04:43,238 OKAY, I REALLY NEED YOUR HELP. 131 00:04:43,238 --> 00:04:46,008 MY LIST HAS 18 ITEMS, AND YOURS FITS ON YOUR HAND. 132 00:04:46,008 --> 00:04:47,976 OH, YEAH. THANKS FOR REMINDING ME. 133 00:04:47,976 --> 00:04:49,345 UH, SEE YA. 134 00:04:49,345 --> 00:04:52,482 WAIT. NO! I NEED TO GET ALL THIS STUFF, AND I CAN'T DRIVE. 135 00:04:52,482 --> 00:04:55,084 IT'S EASY -- RIGHT FOOT GAS, LEFT FOOT BRAKE. 136 00:04:56,152 --> 00:04:57,086 OKAY... 137 00:04:57,086 --> 00:04:58,354 [ DOOR CLOSES ] OKAY... 138 00:04:58,354 --> 00:05:00,189 [ CELLPHONE BEEPS ] [ SIGHS ] CLASSIC. 139 00:05:00,189 --> 00:05:02,191 MEG HAS LEFT HILLARY WITH ALL THE WORK. 140 00:05:02,191 --> 00:05:04,327 OKAY. ALL DONE. 141 00:05:04,928 --> 00:05:06,963 [ SIGHS ] 142 00:05:06,963 --> 00:05:08,932 OH! WHAT? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? 143 00:05:08,932 --> 00:05:09,966 NO! 144 00:05:09,966 --> 00:05:12,802 I COULD JUST EAT YOU GUYS UP! OOH! 145 00:05:12,802 --> 00:05:14,772 CHOMP, CHOMP, CHOMP! YOU TWO LOOK ADORABLE! 146 00:05:14,772 --> 00:05:15,940 MOM, MOM, JACKIE. YEAH? 147 00:05:15,940 --> 00:05:17,841 WE'VE DISCUSSED THIS... MM-HMM. 148 00:05:17,841 --> 00:05:21,011 ...AND WE NO LONGER WANT TO BE CALLED "ADORABLE". 149 00:05:22,212 --> 00:05:25,916 WE ARE BEST MEN, NOT BEST BOYS, AND MEN ARE NOT ADORABLE. 150 00:05:25,916 --> 00:05:27,918 YOU'RE RIGHT. 151 00:05:27,918 --> 00:05:30,788 THIS IS SERIOUS, AND IT SHOULD BE TREATED AS SUCH. 152 00:05:30,788 --> 00:05:32,856 [ CHUCKLES ] YOU BETTER PUT SOME PANTS ON 153 00:05:32,856 --> 00:05:35,960 'CAUSE I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA DO WITH MYSELF! 154 00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:37,027 CHOMP, CHOMP! 155 00:05:37,027 --> 00:05:39,197 OOH, I COULD EAT YOU! YUM, YUM. 156 00:05:39,197 --> 00:05:40,999 CHECK, CHECK, CHECK. 157 00:05:40,999 --> 00:05:43,935 UM, THE CENTERPIECES GO IN THE CENTER. 158 00:05:43,935 --> 00:05:46,371 GOOD. OKAY. 159 00:05:46,371 --> 00:05:48,340 [ CHUCKLES ] OH, I SOLD OUR HOUSE. 160 00:05:48,340 --> 00:05:49,341 WHAT? 161 00:05:49,341 --> 00:05:50,909 WHAT'S THIS -- A SHIRLEY TEMPLE? 162 00:05:50,909 --> 00:05:52,043 UH, UH... 163 00:05:52,043 --> 00:05:53,812 WHEN DID YOU SELL THE HOUSE? 164 00:05:53,812 --> 00:05:55,113 TWO MONTHS AGO. 165 00:05:55,113 --> 00:05:56,114 WENT LIKE THAT. 166 00:05:56,114 --> 00:05:57,916 I BOUGHT A CONDO IN FLORIDA. 167 00:05:57,916 --> 00:05:59,884 I HAVEN'T TOLD YOUR FATHER. 168 00:05:59,884 --> 00:06:01,186 OF COURSE YOU HAVEN'T. [ SIGHS ] 169 00:06:01,186 --> 00:06:04,924 I THINK IT WOULD BE BETTER FOR HIM TO HEAR IT FROM YOU. 170 00:06:04,924 --> 00:06:07,159 WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I'M NOT AROUND? 171 00:06:07,159 --> 00:06:09,261 HEY, PETE. WE'LL JUST BE IN AND OUT. 172 00:06:09,261 --> 00:06:10,930 HILLARY: MOM, JACKIE, OKAY. 173 00:06:10,930 --> 00:06:13,866 HERE'S SOME STUFF THAT I NEED FOR TOMORROW. 174 00:06:13,866 --> 00:06:15,434 THERE YOU GO. I WILL TAKE THIS, AND I WILL TAKE THAT. 175 00:06:15,434 --> 00:06:16,969 JACKIE. 176 00:06:16,969 --> 00:06:18,137 THE IRONY IS PALPABLE. 177 00:06:18,137 --> 00:06:19,872 AH, YEAH, RIGHT? YEAH. 178 00:06:19,872 --> 00:06:21,073 LET'S PALP IT DOWN. 179 00:06:21,073 --> 00:06:22,441 WHAT ARE WE TALKING ABOUT? 180 00:06:22,441 --> 00:06:24,510 WE ARE DOING THE WORK OF FOUR BRIDESMAIDS, 181 00:06:24,510 --> 00:06:26,946 AND THEY'VE ONLY INVITED US TO THE WEDDING TO BE POLITE. 182 00:06:26,946 --> 00:06:28,414 OH! 183 00:06:29,483 --> 00:06:30,784 DIANE, YOU LOCO. 184 00:06:30,784 --> 00:06:32,052 OKAY, THEY LOVE US. 185 00:06:32,052 --> 00:06:34,421 KATE [SIGHS] SHE CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF ME. 186 00:06:34,421 --> 00:06:37,391 SHE'S ALWAYS LIKE, "JACKIE, YOU'RE HERE AGAIN!" 187 00:06:38,425 --> 00:06:40,894 JACKIE. [ CHUCKLES ] FRANCES! 188 00:06:40,894 --> 00:06:42,896 OH, DIANE. OH, FRANCES. 189 00:06:42,896 --> 00:06:44,798 I'VE BARELY SEEN YOU TWO. 190 00:06:44,798 --> 00:06:47,100 YOU WILL STAY FOR DINNER, WON'T YOU? 191 00:06:47,100 --> 00:06:49,302 JACKIE: YES! YES, WE -- 192 00:06:49,302 --> 00:06:51,905 OH, THANK YOU FOR THAT GENUINE INVITATION. 193 00:06:51,905 --> 00:06:54,242 UH, YES, IT'S A LOVELY, POLITE GESTURE. 194 00:06:54,242 --> 00:06:55,343 AWW. 195 00:06:55,343 --> 00:06:57,111 [ SIGHS ] 196 00:06:57,111 --> 00:06:59,781 I THINK YOUR MOM JUST INVITED YOUR EX-WIVES TO OUR REHEARSAL DINNER. 197 00:06:59,781 --> 00:07:02,083 SHE ALSO SOLD THE HOUSE WITHOUT TELLING DAD. 198 00:07:02,083 --> 00:07:03,885 HOW'S THAT GONNA AFFECT HIS SECRET JOB? 199 00:07:03,885 --> 00:07:05,920 WELL, UH, THAT'S THE THING ABOUT THAT. 200 00:07:05,920 --> 00:07:07,155 OH, GOD. 201 00:07:07,155 --> 00:07:10,091 MEG IS SHOWING DAD HER NEW TATTOO, 202 00:07:10,091 --> 00:07:12,427 WHICH IS SO CLOSE TO HER BREASTS. 203 00:07:12,427 --> 00:07:14,328 IT'S INFECTED, BUT YOU -- YOU GET THE GIST. 204 00:07:15,496 --> 00:07:16,864 I LOVE IT. 205 00:07:16,864 --> 00:07:18,199 [ CHUCKLES ] WE'RE DOING IT. 206 00:07:18,199 --> 00:07:19,868 OUR WHOLE FAMILY'S HERE. 207 00:07:19,868 --> 00:07:20,769 WE GOT IT GOING ON. 208 00:07:20,769 --> 00:07:23,072 BRING IT IN. BRING IT. 209 00:07:23,072 --> 00:07:25,174 HI, I'M CRICKET, KATE'S MOM. 210 00:07:25,174 --> 00:07:26,008 HI! 211 00:07:26,008 --> 00:07:27,843 OH... 212 00:07:27,843 --> 00:07:28,811 MWAH! MWAH! 213 00:07:28,811 --> 00:07:29,344 OH... 214 00:07:29,344 --> 00:07:30,079 MWAH! MWAH! 215 00:07:30,079 --> 00:07:31,413 I'M JACKIE. 216 00:07:31,413 --> 00:07:32,915 I'M KATE'S SISTER FROM ANOTHER MISTER. 217 00:07:32,915 --> 00:07:34,783 HEY. HI. 218 00:07:34,783 --> 00:07:36,051 MM. OW. 219 00:07:36,051 --> 00:07:37,419 I'M DIANE. 220 00:07:37,419 --> 00:07:38,921 [ GASPS ] OH, MY GOD! 221 00:07:38,921 --> 00:07:41,156 ALL: AWWWWW! 222 00:07:41,156 --> 00:07:44,260 DIANE: OH, YOU LOOK SO ADORABLE! HILLARY: LOOK, YOU GUYS MATCH! 223 00:07:44,260 --> 00:07:45,395 DAMN IT! 224 00:07:45,395 --> 00:07:47,030 [ GRUNTS ] [ SIGHS ] 225 00:07:47,030 --> 00:07:50,066 [ LAUGHING ] 226 00:07:50,066 --> 00:07:53,136 HOW DOES ONE GET A NAME LIKE CRICKET? 227 00:07:53,136 --> 00:07:56,172 OH, I USED TO HIDE BEHIND THE REFRIGERATOR AND CHIRP. 228 00:07:56,172 --> 00:07:57,373 [ CHUCKLES ] 229 00:07:57,373 --> 00:07:59,342 AND NOW YOUR FINAL COURSE. 230 00:07:59,342 --> 00:08:01,945 OH, I COULDN'T POSSIBLY EAT ANOTHER BITE. 231 00:08:01,945 --> 00:08:03,446 [ CHUCKLES ] 232 00:08:03,446 --> 00:08:05,248 WHAT? ♪ SHAKE THAT THING ♪ 233 00:08:05,248 --> 00:08:06,916 ♪ SHAKE, SHAKE THAT THING ♪ [ HILLARY GASPS ] 234 00:08:06,916 --> 00:08:08,485 OH! 235 00:08:08,485 --> 00:08:10,254 OKAY, BUDDY. 236 00:08:10,254 --> 00:08:11,922 TAKE IT EASY, BUDDY. 237 00:08:11,922 --> 00:08:14,425 THERE'S KIDS. GO, DAD. IT'S YOUR PARTY. 238 00:08:15,126 --> 00:08:16,060 OH! 239 00:08:16,060 --> 00:08:17,495 WHY DON'T WE GET THE KI-- 240 00:08:17,495 --> 00:08:20,064 OKAY. BEDTIME. LET'S GO. 241 00:08:20,064 --> 00:08:21,966 NOTHING TO SEE HERE. 242 00:08:21,966 --> 00:08:24,268 BUT THERE'S A DANCE PARTY! YEAH. 243 00:08:24,268 --> 00:08:26,237 PETE: OKAY. LET'S GO OUT. 244 00:08:26,237 --> 00:08:27,438 YOU'RE OUT. YOU'RE OUT. 245 00:08:27,438 --> 00:08:29,006 OH, GREAT. OKAY. 246 00:08:29,006 --> 00:08:31,308 UH, HERE COMES -- HERE COMES DESSERT. 247 00:08:31,308 --> 00:08:33,144 MOM, DID YOU HIRE A STRIPPER? 248 00:08:33,144 --> 00:08:34,412 WHAT? NO! 249 00:08:34,412 --> 00:08:35,947 AND NOW... 250 00:08:35,947 --> 00:08:37,048 [ ALL GASP ] 251 00:08:37,048 --> 00:08:38,950 ...DESSERT. PETE: OH, GEEZ. 252 00:08:38,950 --> 00:08:40,952 I HIRED TWO STRIPPERS! WHAT, WHAT! 253 00:08:40,952 --> 00:08:42,154 REALLY? REALLY, CRICKET? 254 00:08:42,154 --> 00:08:43,955 COME ON! WHOO! 255 00:08:43,955 --> 00:08:45,957 I DON'T THINK WE'RE IN OHIO ANYMORE. 256 00:08:45,957 --> 00:08:47,893 OH, YEAH, OH, YEAH, OH. YEAH. 257 00:08:47,893 --> 00:08:48,760 MEG, REALLY? 258 00:08:50,481 --> 00:08:53,241 I AM SO SORRY ABOUT ALL OF THIS. I REALLY AM. 259 00:08:53,241 --> 00:08:54,909 CRICKET: WHAT ARE YOU SORRY ABOUT? 260 00:08:54,909 --> 00:08:56,611 ABOUT HOW MUCH FUN YOU JUST HAD? 261 00:08:56,611 --> 00:08:59,548 NO WAY I WAS LETTING MY LITTLE GIRL GET MARRIED 262 00:08:59,548 --> 00:09:02,017 WITHOUT HAVING A BACHELORETTE PARTY. 263 00:09:02,017 --> 00:09:03,652 CRICKET, IT WASN'T A BACHELORETTE PARTY. 264 00:09:03,652 --> 00:09:04,653 IT WAS A REHEARSAL DINNER. 265 00:09:04,653 --> 00:09:05,654 WITH CHILDREN. 266 00:09:05,654 --> 00:09:07,055 IT WAS FUNNY. 267 00:09:07,055 --> 00:09:09,791 PEOPLE WITH SENSES OF HUMOR WOULD HAVE FOUND THAT FUNNY. 268 00:09:09,791 --> 00:09:11,760 KATE THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY, DIDN'T YOU, KATE? [ CHUCKLES ] 269 00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:13,562 NO, MOM, I DIDN'T THINK IT WAS FUNNY, 270 00:09:13,562 --> 00:09:15,864 AND YOU'RE EMBARRASSING ME IN FRONT OF MY FAMILY. 271 00:09:15,864 --> 00:09:18,634 WELL [CLEARS THROAT] I'M GONNA HIT THE HAY. 272 00:09:18,634 --> 00:09:20,068 YEAH. WELL, I -- 273 00:09:20,068 --> 00:09:22,971 I THINK I'LL GO MAKE A GROCERY LIST FOR WHEN WE GET BACK HOME. 274 00:09:22,971 --> 00:09:24,641 EXCELLENT IDEA. 275 00:09:24,641 --> 00:09:27,076 I THINK I'LL GO MAKE A GROCERY LIST AT HOME, AS WELL. 276 00:09:27,076 --> 00:09:28,211 JACKIE, LET'S GO. 277 00:09:28,211 --> 00:09:30,580 WHY ARE YOU GOING HOME TO MAKE A GROCERY LIST? 278 00:09:30,580 --> 00:09:32,015 I WANT TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS. 279 00:09:32,015 --> 00:09:33,683 JACKIE. OH! 280 00:09:33,683 --> 00:09:34,751 LET'S GO. 281 00:09:34,751 --> 00:09:36,819 SEE? YOU MADE EVERYONE UNCOMFORTABLE. 282 00:09:36,819 --> 00:09:37,954 I DID? 283 00:09:37,954 --> 00:09:40,723 NO, NO, MOM. YOU SHOWED UP IN HANDCUFFS, 284 00:09:40,723 --> 00:09:42,158 AND YOU BROUGHT WEAPONS AND LINGERIE. 285 00:09:42,158 --> 00:09:44,694 NOW BERT, HE WANTS TEAR-AWAY PANTS FOR CHRISTMAS. 286 00:09:44,694 --> 00:09:47,063 [ CHUCKLES ] YOU KNOW, THIS IS THE FIRST I'VE HEARD OF THIS. 287 00:09:47,063 --> 00:09:48,731 WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST SAY SOMETHING? 288 00:09:48,731 --> 00:09:51,068 MOM, THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE MY DREAM WEDDING WEEKEND, OKAY? 289 00:09:51,068 --> 00:09:52,670 I DIDN'T WANT TO GET ANGRY! 290 00:09:52,670 --> 00:09:54,572 OH, SNAP! 291 00:09:54,572 --> 00:09:58,742 I THINK SOMEBODY'S GOT A BRIDEZILLA ON THEIR HANDS, OKAY? 292 00:09:58,742 --> 00:10:00,578 UGH! I'LL BE ON MY AIR MATTRESS. 293 00:10:00,578 --> 00:10:02,446 HOPE I DON'T EMBARRASS ANYONE 294 00:10:02,446 --> 00:10:05,549 WHILE I'M FARTING AND BREATHING LIKE A PERSON. 295 00:10:05,549 --> 00:10:07,484 WOW. 296 00:10:07,484 --> 00:10:09,119 I'M SO GLAD WE'RE ALREADY MARRIED, 297 00:10:09,119 --> 00:10:11,655 OR I DON'T KNOW IF WE WOULD HAVE GOTTEN THROUGH THIS. 298 00:10:11,655 --> 00:10:13,123 [ SIGHS ] 299 00:10:13,123 --> 00:10:15,560 [ DISTANT RUMBLING ] 300 00:10:15,560 --> 00:10:19,931 SOUNDS LIKE DAD'S SLEEP-APNEA MACHINE IS UP AND RUNNING. 301 00:10:19,931 --> 00:10:21,900 IF YOU NEED ME IN THE NEXT EIGHT HOURS, 302 00:10:21,900 --> 00:10:23,969 I'LL BE STARING AT THE CEILING. 303 00:10:49,962 --> 00:10:51,597 [ DOOR OPENS ] 304 00:10:51,597 --> 00:10:52,865 HEY. 305 00:10:52,865 --> 00:10:54,133 [ SIGHS ] 306 00:10:54,133 --> 00:10:55,868 MY DAD JUST SPOONED ME. 307 00:10:55,868 --> 00:10:57,703 SURE. YEAH. 308 00:10:57,703 --> 00:10:58,938 NO, I'LL BE HERE TILL THE WEDDING. 309 00:10:58,938 --> 00:11:01,507 THEN I'LL JUST RUSH OUT -- VOWS, SMOOCH, CAKE -- 310 00:11:01,507 --> 00:11:03,175 AND BE RIGHT BACK ON THE BUCKET. 311 00:11:03,175 --> 00:11:05,846 THAT'S EVERY LITTLE GIRL'S DREAM. 312 00:11:05,846 --> 00:11:07,180 WHY DID I THINK IT WAS A GOOD IDEA 313 00:11:07,180 --> 00:11:08,548 FOR US TO INVITE OUR PARENTS? 314 00:11:08,548 --> 00:11:10,017 BECAUSE IT'S A WEDDING TRADITION. 315 00:11:10,017 --> 00:11:12,152 YOU INVITE YOUR PARENTS, AND THEN YOU IMMEDIATELY REGRET IT. 316 00:11:12,152 --> 00:11:14,221 I JUST THOUGHT THAT JUST FOR ME, JUST FOR ONE DAY, 317 00:11:14,221 --> 00:11:15,656 IT WOULDN'T BE THE CRICKET SHOW. 318 00:11:15,656 --> 00:11:17,090 WELL, AT LEAST YOU TRIED. 319 00:11:17,090 --> 00:11:18,458 ALL I DO IS...SIGH. 320 00:11:18,458 --> 00:11:19,893 YOU KNOW WHAT I WOULD DO? 321 00:11:19,893 --> 00:11:22,596 I WOULD LOCK UP MAN FRANCIS AND LADY FRANCES IN A ROOM, 322 00:11:22,596 --> 00:11:24,631 BLURT OUR THEIR SECRETS, AND THEN JUST RUN. 323 00:11:24,631 --> 00:11:25,999 YOU WOULD DO THAT FOR ME? 324 00:11:25,999 --> 00:11:27,901 SURE, IF YOU'LL GET MY MOM TO STOP ACTING 325 00:11:27,901 --> 00:11:29,604 LIKE GARY BUSEY IN A TUBE TOP. 326 00:11:29,604 --> 00:11:31,606 THAT'S WHO SHE REMINDS ME OF. THANK YOU. 327 00:11:33,541 --> 00:11:35,543 FRANCES, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 328 00:11:35,543 --> 00:11:37,211 I'M CLEANING THE DISHWASHER. 329 00:11:37,211 --> 00:11:38,646 YOU KNOW WHAT? 330 00:11:38,646 --> 00:11:40,181 I HAVE A MESS FOR YOU TO CLEAN UP IN THE BEDROOM. 331 00:11:40,181 --> 00:11:42,016 OH, HOW EXCITING! 332 00:11:42,016 --> 00:11:43,851 WHERE'S THE MESS? 333 00:11:45,019 --> 00:11:47,655 THE MESS IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH FRANCIS. 334 00:11:47,655 --> 00:11:49,857 AW, WHAT'S ALL THE FUSS? I JUST TOOK MY PANTS OFF. 335 00:11:49,857 --> 00:11:51,693 NO, NO. YOU TWO NEED TO TALK. 336 00:11:51,693 --> 00:11:53,205 AND I'M NOT LETTING YOU OUT 337 00:11:53,205 --> 00:11:55,208 UNTIL YOU AIR YOUR DIRTY LAUNDRY. 338 00:11:55,208 --> 00:11:56,676 [ SIGHS ] 339 00:11:59,145 --> 00:12:00,346 [ DOOR OPENS IN DISTANCE ] 340 00:12:00,346 --> 00:12:02,215 OH, DAMN IT! 341 00:12:03,182 --> 00:12:05,184 REALLY? REALLY? 342 00:12:05,184 --> 00:12:07,153 YOU'D RATHER ESCAPE THAN TALK TO EACH OTHER? 343 00:12:07,153 --> 00:12:08,655 WHAT'S THERE TO TALK ABOUT? 344 00:12:08,655 --> 00:12:09,656 EVERYTHING'S FINE. 345 00:12:09,656 --> 00:12:11,124 OH, YEAH? ALL RIGHT. 346 00:12:11,124 --> 00:12:13,159 WELL, MAN FRANCIS GOT A SECRET JOB, 347 00:12:13,159 --> 00:12:15,228 AND LADY FRANCES, SHE SOLD YOUR HOUSE 348 00:12:15,228 --> 00:12:16,262 AND BOUGHT A CONDO IN FLORIDA. 349 00:12:16,262 --> 00:12:18,097 BOOM! NOW TALK IT OUT. 350 00:12:18,097 --> 00:12:19,500 YELL AT EACH OTHER. WHATEVER YOU GOT TO DO. 351 00:12:19,500 --> 00:12:20,467 [ CLICKS TONGUE ] 352 00:12:25,706 --> 00:12:26,807 SO. 353 00:12:26,807 --> 00:12:28,475 WELL, BETTER GET TO IT. 354 00:12:28,475 --> 00:12:30,744 THAT DISHWASHER WON'T CLEAN ITSELF. 355 00:12:32,079 --> 00:12:33,514 YES, IT WILL. [ CHUCKLES ] 356 00:12:33,514 --> 00:12:36,583 THE DISHWASHER CLEANS ITSELF EVERY TIME IT CLEANS THE DISHES. 357 00:12:36,583 --> 00:12:38,185 I READ ONLINE THAT ONCE YOU START SHAVING, 358 00:12:38,185 --> 00:12:39,520 IT STARTS GROWING BACK LIKE CRAZY. 359 00:12:39,520 --> 00:12:41,588 SHAVE TODAY, BEARD TOMORROW. 360 00:12:43,324 --> 00:12:46,328 WOW! MY SKIN FEELS LIKE IT'S ALIVE! 361 00:12:46,328 --> 00:12:48,163 WE ARE STUDS. OOH! 362 00:12:49,230 --> 00:12:50,632 HEY, IT'S JUST SQUIRTING. 363 00:12:54,803 --> 00:12:56,137 [ SIGHS ] 364 00:12:56,137 --> 00:12:57,739 WOW. YOU SMELL AWESOME, 365 00:12:57,739 --> 00:13:00,375 LIKE THAT CAB DRIVER WE HAD IN VEGAS. 366 00:13:00,375 --> 00:13:02,143 PETE: HEY, GUYS, HAVE YOU SEEN CRICKET? 367 00:13:02,143 --> 00:13:03,545 GOOD GOD. 368 00:13:03,545 --> 00:13:06,181 WHAT IS THAT SMELL? 369 00:13:06,181 --> 00:13:07,248 DRINK IT IN, DADDY. 370 00:13:07,248 --> 00:13:09,385 IT'S THE SMELL OF YOUR BOYS BECOMING MEN. 371 00:13:11,454 --> 00:13:12,421 AS YOU WERE. 372 00:13:12,421 --> 00:13:13,522 CRICKET? [ SIGHS ] 373 00:13:13,522 --> 00:13:14,590 [ LIGHTER CLICKS ] 374 00:13:14,590 --> 00:13:16,592 CRICKET, WILL YOU GET OFF THE ROOF? 375 00:13:16,592 --> 00:13:18,294 CRICKET, YOU'RE GONNA GET HURT, 376 00:13:18,294 --> 00:13:20,463 AND I W-WOULDN'T PUT IT PAST YOU TO SUE ME. 377 00:13:20,463 --> 00:13:22,031 NO. I'M RELAXING. 378 00:13:22,031 --> 00:13:24,066 I HAVE A PRESCRIPTION FOR IT. 379 00:13:24,066 --> 00:13:26,135 YEAH, WHAT'S YOUR CONDITION -- TERMINAL IMMATURITY? 380 00:13:26,135 --> 00:13:28,137 [ CHUCKLES SARCASTICALLY ] OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT? 381 00:13:28,137 --> 00:13:30,172 WILL YOU JUST PLEASE COME DOWN? 382 00:13:30,172 --> 00:13:31,240 COME DOWN. 383 00:13:31,240 --> 00:13:33,709 OH, NO! NOT THE POOL SKIMMER! 384 00:13:33,709 --> 00:13:35,412 GET DOWN! I GUESS YOU'RE TOO SHORT, RED. 385 00:13:35,412 --> 00:13:37,814 YEAH, WELL, JOKE'S ON YOU 386 00:13:37,814 --> 00:13:40,450 'CAUSE I BOUGHT THE EXTENDABLE ONE. 387 00:13:40,450 --> 00:13:42,352 OKAY, NOW [CHUCKLES] GET DOWN! 388 00:13:42,352 --> 00:13:44,788 KATE: WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON OUT HERE? 389 00:13:44,788 --> 00:13:46,156 [ SIGHS ] 390 00:13:46,156 --> 00:13:47,491 I WANTED TO TALK TO YOUR MOTHER 391 00:13:47,491 --> 00:13:49,292 ABOUT THE NEED TO ACT LIKE A GROWN-UP, 392 00:13:49,292 --> 00:13:51,161 BUT FIRST I HAVE TO GET HER OFF THE ROOF. 393 00:13:51,161 --> 00:13:52,396 OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT, HONEY? 394 00:13:52,396 --> 00:13:53,430 I GOT THIS. I GOT IT. 395 00:13:53,430 --> 00:13:55,232 [ GROANS ] WHAT IS THE DEAL? 396 00:13:55,232 --> 00:13:56,199 [ CRICKET SIGHS ] 397 00:13:56,199 --> 00:13:59,236 I SEE YOUR LIFE -- 398 00:13:59,236 --> 00:14:02,340 THE WHITE PICKET FENCE, THE LAWYER HUSBAND, 399 00:14:02,340 --> 00:14:04,342 ALL THAT SHRIMP. 400 00:14:04,342 --> 00:14:07,178 I MEAN, IT'S JUST SO NICE... 401 00:14:07,178 --> 00:14:09,680 AND, LIKE...NORMAL. 402 00:14:09,680 --> 00:14:11,182 [ SIGHS ] 403 00:14:11,182 --> 00:14:13,317 YOU MUST HAVE REALLY HATED GROWING UP WITH ME. 404 00:14:13,317 --> 00:14:15,653 MOM, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE SEEING, 405 00:14:15,653 --> 00:14:17,622 BUT THERE IS NOTHING NORMAL ABOUT THIS. 406 00:14:17,622 --> 00:14:21,092 ONE NIGHT, I GOT UP TO PEE, AND I FOUND JACKIE IN OUR BATHTUB. 407 00:14:21,092 --> 00:14:23,194 SO... 408 00:14:23,194 --> 00:14:25,631 YOU'RE NOT MAD THAT I PULLED YOU OUT OF THE FOURTH GRADE 409 00:14:25,631 --> 00:14:28,300 AND MOVED US TO HAWAII WHEN I BROKE UP WITH YOUR TEACHER? 410 00:14:28,300 --> 00:14:30,602 NO! NO. 411 00:14:30,602 --> 00:14:32,271 SO, I'M NOT GREAT AT FRACTIONS. 412 00:14:32,271 --> 00:14:35,507 BUT IF IT WEREN'T FOR MY... UNIQUE CHILDHOOD, 413 00:14:35,507 --> 00:14:38,076 I WOULDN'T HAVE THIS UNIQUE LIFE THAT I LOVE. 414 00:14:39,178 --> 00:14:41,547 [ CHUCKLING ] JUST PROMISE ME NO STRIPPERS AT THE WEDDING. 415 00:14:41,547 --> 00:14:43,682 [ CHUCKLING ] OF COURSE NOT. OKAY. 416 00:14:43,682 --> 00:14:45,617 JUST TOSS ME YOUR PHONE, AND I'LL CANCEL THEM. 417 00:14:45,617 --> 00:14:46,618 COME ON. 418 00:14:46,618 --> 00:14:48,053 OH, MY GOD. 419 00:14:48,053 --> 00:14:49,288 YEAH, YOU, UH -- YOU SEE THE STUBBLE? 420 00:14:49,288 --> 00:14:50,590 NO, JUST SCABS. 421 00:14:51,658 --> 00:14:53,159 HEY, HOW'D IT GO? 422 00:14:53,159 --> 00:14:54,494 SURPRISINGLY WELL. 423 00:14:54,494 --> 00:14:57,163 YEAH, SO -- OH! 424 00:14:57,163 --> 00:14:58,565 OH, MY GOD, WHAT ARE YOU GUYS CARRYING? 425 00:14:58,565 --> 00:14:59,399 YOUR WEDDING. 426 00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:01,401 WHAT? YEAH. 427 00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:03,436 I HAD NO IDEA YOU WERE DOING ALL OF THIS. 428 00:15:03,436 --> 00:15:05,171 [ GASPS ] YOU'RE AMAZING! 429 00:15:05,171 --> 00:15:08,107 OH. OH, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! 430 00:15:08,107 --> 00:15:10,043 I THOUGHT YOU WERE JUST COMING TO BE POLITE, 431 00:15:10,043 --> 00:15:11,244 BUT FOR YOU TO DO ALL THIS... 432 00:15:11,244 --> 00:15:12,612 YOU REALLY WANT TO BE THERE. 433 00:15:12,612 --> 00:15:15,583 I-I-I'M SO GLAD. REALLY. 434 00:15:15,583 --> 00:15:17,685 I MEAN, THIS WEDDING WOULD NOT BE THE SAME WITHOUT YOU THERE. 435 00:15:17,685 --> 00:15:19,386 SEE? I TOLD YOU SO, JACKIE. 436 00:15:19,386 --> 00:15:22,056 FRANCIS: I HAVE SOME BAD NEWS. 437 00:15:22,056 --> 00:15:24,625 OH, OF COURSE. IT'S BEEN 20 MINUTES. 438 00:15:24,625 --> 00:15:27,014 GREAT AUNT MARGARET IS DEAD. 439 00:15:27,014 --> 00:15:28,416 NO! NO! 440 00:15:28,416 --> 00:15:30,952 HER FUNERAL'S ON SATURDAY, SO... 441 00:15:30,952 --> 00:15:33,521 THE WEDDING IS OFF. 442 00:15:33,521 --> 00:15:34,789 WELL, KATE, WE COULD -- 443 00:15:34,789 --> 00:15:36,991 NO, NO. PETE, WE SHOULD GO. 444 00:15:36,991 --> 00:15:38,759 I MEAN, THE WEDDING CAN WAIT. 445 00:15:38,759 --> 00:15:40,796 WE'RE ALREADY MARRIED, RIGHT? [ CHUCKLES ] 446 00:15:40,796 --> 00:15:42,364 I HAVE SOME BAD NEWS. 447 00:15:42,364 --> 00:15:44,866 GREAT AUNT MARGARET IS DEAD. 448 00:15:44,866 --> 00:15:47,869 THE FUNERAL'S ON SATURDAY, SO... 449 00:15:47,869 --> 00:15:50,339 YOU GUYS REALLY DON'T TALK ABOUT ANYTHING, DO YOU? 450 00:15:53,342 --> 00:15:55,510 [ INDISTINCT INTERCOM CHATTER ] 451 00:15:55,510 --> 00:15:57,346 PETE: [ SIGHS ] I'M SORRY, BABY. 452 00:15:57,346 --> 00:15:58,814 I KNOW THIS ISN'T THE WAY 453 00:15:58,814 --> 00:16:00,916 YOU EXPECTED TO SPEND YOUR WEDDING DAY. 454 00:16:00,916 --> 00:16:03,552 IT'S OKAY. IT'S OKAY. [ CHUCKLES ] 455 00:16:03,552 --> 00:16:04,820 MM, YOU KNOW WHAT? 456 00:16:04,820 --> 00:16:06,856 [ INHALES DEEPLY ] 457 00:16:06,856 --> 00:16:08,992 I GONNA STOP TALKING ABOUT IT BECAUSE I'M GONNA CRY 458 00:16:08,992 --> 00:16:10,994 AND WEIRD EVERYONE OUT ON THE PLANE, SO... 459 00:16:10,994 --> 00:16:12,295 [ SIGHS ] 460 00:16:12,295 --> 00:16:14,497 DO YOU HAVE A XANAX OR A PEOPLE MAGAZINE? 461 00:16:14,497 --> 00:16:17,166 LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, FLIGHT 773 WILL BEGIN BOARDING FOR PORTLAND. 462 00:16:17,166 --> 00:16:18,935 I'D LIKE TO WELCOME OUR FIRST-CLASS PASSENGERS, 463 00:16:18,935 --> 00:16:21,204 PREMIERE EXECUTIVE PLATINUM, MILES PLATINUM PREMIERE CLASS... 464 00:16:21,204 --> 00:16:22,405 WOW. 465 00:16:22,405 --> 00:16:24,974 A LOT OF PERSONALITY GOING TO PORTLAND. 466 00:16:24,974 --> 00:16:26,476 WEIRD TOWN. 467 00:16:44,128 --> 00:16:46,530 YOU KNOW YOU'RE ALLOWED TO PLAY GAMES ON YOUR PHONE 468 00:16:46,530 --> 00:16:47,998 THE WHOLE FLIGHT NOW, RIGHT? 469 00:16:47,998 --> 00:16:50,901 I LIKE TO FEEL THE PIECES IN MY HAND. 470 00:16:50,901 --> 00:16:52,169 YEAH. OF COURSE YOU DO. 471 00:16:52,169 --> 00:16:53,904 HERE. Y-YOU KNOW WHAT, BUDDY? HERE. 472 00:16:53,904 --> 00:16:55,406 WHY DON'T YOU JUST HOLD THE DRINKS, 473 00:16:55,406 --> 00:16:56,875 AND I'LL FINISH UP THE BOARD, OKAY? 474 00:16:56,875 --> 00:16:57,809 OKAY. 475 00:16:57,809 --> 00:17:00,211 HOW YOU GUYS DOING BACK HERE? 476 00:17:00,211 --> 00:17:03,181 OH, GOOD. YOU KNOW, WE'RE JUST SETTING UP THE BOARD -- 477 00:17:03,181 --> 00:17:05,784 GAME THAT HAS 100 TINY, TINY, TINY PIECES. 478 00:17:05,784 --> 00:17:08,053 DAD, DAD, CAN I TELL YOU MY STRATEGY? [ GASPS ] OH! 479 00:17:08,053 --> 00:17:09,321 OH, OH, BUDDY, BUDDY. OH! 480 00:17:09,321 --> 00:17:10,955 I'M SORRY! ADULTS SPILL, TOO! ADULTS SPILL, TOO! 481 00:17:10,955 --> 00:17:12,824 IT'S FINE. IT'S FINE. IT'S JUST COLD. IT'S FINE. 482 00:17:12,824 --> 00:17:14,793 HONEY, YOU -- YOU WANT TO GO TO THE RESTROOM? I'LL CLEAN THIS UP. 483 00:17:14,793 --> 00:17:16,761 YEAH. AW. 484 00:17:16,761 --> 00:17:18,763 DO -- DO YOU HAVE ANY TOWELS? [ SIGHS ] 485 00:17:18,763 --> 00:17:19,898 SOME NAPKINS. 486 00:17:21,133 --> 00:17:22,501 THANK YOU. 487 00:17:22,501 --> 00:17:23,502 [ WATER SPLASHES ] 488 00:17:23,502 --> 00:17:24,837 [ GROANS ] 489 00:17:24,837 --> 00:17:26,238 GREAT. JUST -- 490 00:17:26,238 --> 00:17:27,373 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 491 00:17:27,373 --> 00:17:29,141 IT'S LOCKED. SOMEONE'S IN HERE. 492 00:17:29,141 --> 00:17:30,409 HILLARY: IT'S ME. 493 00:17:30,409 --> 00:17:31,911 IT'S FOR YOU. 494 00:17:31,911 --> 00:17:33,846 I ALWAYS PACK EXTRA CLOTHES. 495 00:17:33,846 --> 00:17:35,247 WARREN WAS A PLANE PUKER. 496 00:17:35,247 --> 00:17:36,215 STILL IS. 497 00:17:36,215 --> 00:17:37,083 THANKS. 498 00:17:40,052 --> 00:17:41,187 WOW. 499 00:17:41,187 --> 00:17:43,856 BERT'S GONNA HAVE A FIELD DAY WITH THIS. 500 00:17:48,295 --> 00:17:50,130 [ SIGHS ] 501 00:17:53,500 --> 00:17:54,901 KATE: WOW. [ INHALES DEEPLY ] 502 00:18:07,948 --> 00:18:09,850 HEY, GIRL. 503 00:18:09,850 --> 00:18:11,119 [ CHUCKLES ] MOM! 504 00:18:11,119 --> 00:18:12,820 HOW DID YOU GET HERE? 505 00:18:12,820 --> 00:18:14,389 I SNUCK ON. 506 00:18:14,389 --> 00:18:16,057 WHAT?! SHH! BE COOL, BE COOL! 507 00:18:16,057 --> 00:18:18,493 NO, I DIDN'T. [ CHUCKLES ] 508 00:18:18,493 --> 00:18:20,194 PETE BOUGHT ME A TICKET. 509 00:18:20,194 --> 00:18:22,296 [ SIGHS ] OH, YOU LOOK GOOD. 510 00:18:22,296 --> 00:18:25,133 THANKS. YOU READY? 511 00:18:25,133 --> 00:18:27,201 'CAUSE THERE'S A GUY UP THERE WHO REALLY WANTS TO MARRY YOU. 512 00:18:27,201 --> 00:18:30,004 WOW. [ BOTH CHUCKLE ] 513 00:18:30,004 --> 00:18:30,938 YEAH. 514 00:18:32,807 --> 00:18:36,345 TIME TO WALK MY BABY DOWN THE AISLE. 515 00:18:36,345 --> 00:18:37,513 HIT IT! 516 00:18:37,513 --> 00:18:39,915 [ "SOMEBODY'S GETTING MARRIED" PLAYS ] 517 00:18:42,317 --> 00:18:46,889 MISS PIGGY: ♪ HE'LL MAKE ME HAPPY ♪ 518 00:18:46,889 --> 00:18:49,858 [ CHUCKLES ] ♪ EACH TIME I SEE HIM ♪ 519 00:18:49,858 --> 00:18:52,828 ♪ HE'LL BE THE REASON ♪ 520 00:18:52,828 --> 00:18:54,997 ♪ MY HEART CAN SING ♪ 521 00:18:54,997 --> 00:18:56,765 [ CHUCKLES ] 522 00:18:56,765 --> 00:18:59,535 ♪ HE'LL STAND BESIDE ME ♪ 523 00:18:59,535 --> 00:19:02,806 ♪ AND NOW I'M EVERYTHING ♪ 524 00:19:02,806 --> 00:19:05,508 KERMIT: ♪ SHE'LL MAKE ME HAPPY ♪ 525 00:19:05,508 --> 00:19:09,112 ♪ EACH TIME I HOLD HER ♪ 526 00:19:09,112 --> 00:19:11,347 ♪ AND I WILL FOLLOW ♪ 527 00:19:11,347 --> 00:19:14,284 ♪ WHERE MY HEART MAY LEAD ♪ 528 00:19:15,452 --> 00:19:17,153 KEEP IT TOGETHER, BERT! 529 00:19:17,153 --> 00:19:18,555 BE A MAN! 530 00:19:18,555 --> 00:19:22,792 SOMETIMES, A MAN JUST NEEDS TO CRY. 531 00:19:22,792 --> 00:19:24,794 I CAN'T BELIEVE WE PULLED THIS OFF! 532 00:19:24,794 --> 00:19:27,031 UH, WE? WHAT ARE YOU -- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 533 00:19:27,031 --> 00:19:28,766 YOU ALMOST MISSED THE FLIGHT. I -- 534 00:19:28,766 --> 00:19:30,100 SHH. THIS IS KATE'S DAY. 535 00:19:30,100 --> 00:19:31,335 HAPPY WEDDING, KATE. 536 00:19:31,335 --> 00:19:34,004 PETE, THIS IS AMAZING. [ CHUCKLES ] 537 00:19:34,004 --> 00:19:36,073 THE SONG, EVERYBODY. 538 00:19:36,073 --> 00:19:39,510 WELL, A GUY CAN DO A LOT WITH SOME FREQUENT-FLIER MILES. 539 00:19:39,510 --> 00:19:41,445 [ CHUCKLES ] 540 00:19:41,445 --> 00:19:43,113 PETE, IT'S PERFECT. 541 00:19:43,113 --> 00:19:46,217 EXCUSE ME, LOVEBIRDS. COMING THROUGH. 542 00:19:46,217 --> 00:19:47,551 SORRY ABOUT THIS. 543 00:19:47,551 --> 00:19:50,454 MY OPTIONS FOR OFFICIANTS WERE LIMITED. 544 00:19:50,454 --> 00:19:51,923 READY? 545 00:19:51,923 --> 00:19:53,525 DO YOU, PETE, 546 00:19:53,525 --> 00:19:57,362 TAKE KATE TO BE YOUR LAWFULLY WEDDED WIFE, 547 00:19:57,362 --> 00:20:00,398 TO HOLD -- MM, "TO HOLD"? 548 00:20:00,398 --> 00:20:01,299 I DO. 549 00:20:01,299 --> 00:20:02,501 OKAY. 550 00:20:02,501 --> 00:20:05,303 DO YOU, KATE, TAKE THIS MAN, PETE, 551 00:20:05,303 --> 00:20:07,038 TO BE YOUR LAWFULLY WEDDED HUSBAND, 552 00:20:07,038 --> 00:20:11,109 TO LOVE AND TO CHERISH AS LONG AS YOU BOTH -- 553 00:20:11,109 --> 00:20:12,878 AS LONG AS PETE SHALL LIVE? 554 00:20:13,945 --> 00:20:15,514 I DO. 555 00:20:15,514 --> 00:20:17,152 WELL, THEN BY THE POWER VESTED IN ME 556 00:20:17,152 --> 00:20:18,587 BY LASTMINUTEORDINATION.COM, 557 00:20:18,587 --> 00:20:21,557 I NOW RE-PRONOUNCE YOU MAN AND WIFE. 558 00:20:21,557 --> 00:20:23,458 YOU MAY NOW KISS THE BRIDE. 559 00:20:23,458 --> 00:20:25,727 I LOVE YOU, BABY. I LOVE YOU. 560 00:20:25,727 --> 00:20:28,230 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] MUPPETS: ♪ THEY'LL BE SO HAPPY ♪ 561 00:20:28,230 --> 00:20:31,567 ♪ NOW AND FOREVER ♪ 562 00:20:31,567 --> 00:20:33,969 ♪ UNTIL FOREVER ♪ WHOO! 563 00:20:33,969 --> 00:20:36,605 THIS IS A PERFECT DAY. 564 00:20:36,605 --> 00:20:38,173 I'D JUST LOVE A PICTURE OF ALL OF US. 565 00:20:38,173 --> 00:20:39,875 WE'LL GET A PICTURE AT THE FUNERAL. 566 00:20:39,875 --> 00:20:42,111 PERFECT! [ CHUCKLES ] 567 00:20:43,880 --> 00:20:46,449 [ SIGHS ] ISN'T THIS NICE? 568 00:20:46,449 --> 00:20:48,685 IT'D BE NICER IF PETER HAD SPRUNG FOR FIRST CLASS. 569 00:20:52,722 --> 00:20:54,023 [ GASPS ] I AM SO EXCITED. 570 00:20:54,023 --> 00:20:55,892 I FINALLY GET MY OWN WEDDING VIDEO. 571 00:20:55,892 --> 00:20:57,961 YES. NOTHING MORE EXCITING 572 00:20:57,961 --> 00:20:59,796 THAN WATCHING SOMEONE ELSE'S WEDDING VIDEO. 573 00:20:59,796 --> 00:21:01,931 I KNOW! I'M EXCITED, TOO! 574 00:21:01,931 --> 00:21:03,933 JACKIE: DO YOU, KATE, TAKE THIS MAN, PETE, 575 00:21:03,933 --> 00:21:05,468 TO BE YOUR LAWFULLY WEDDED HUSBAND... 576 00:21:05,468 --> 00:21:07,504 MEG, IS THAT YOUR CHIN? 577 00:21:07,504 --> 00:21:08,872 SHOCKER. 578 00:21:08,872 --> 00:21:10,908 I'M SURE SHE TURNS IT AROUND. MEG. 579 00:21:10,908 --> 00:21:12,576 YEAH. [ CLEARS THROAT ] HILLARY: NO. 580 00:21:13,978 --> 00:21:15,546 ARE YOU KIDDING ME? MEG: WHAT?! 581 00:21:15,546 --> 00:21:16,513 IT'S NOT MY FAULT. 582 00:21:16,513 --> 00:21:17,681 IF PETE HAD PONIED UP THE CASH 583 00:21:17,681 --> 00:21:18,916 AND BROUGHT THE VIDEOGRAPHER ON THE PLANE, 584 00:21:18,916 --> 00:21:19,899 NONE OF THIS WOULD HAVE HAPPENED. 585 00:21:19,899 --> 00:21:21,000 I'LL CALL THE AIRLINE. 586 00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:23,770 MAYBE THE BLACK BOX PICKED UP SOME OF IT. 587 00:21:23,770 --> 00:21:24,604 THERE'S STILL SOUND.