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{\an8}[inmates snoring]
7
00:01:46,148 --> 00:01:50,819
Chiert, help me, suki, bliadi.
8
00:01:51,945 --> 00:01:53,571
What are you looking for?
9
00:01:53,656 --> 00:01:55,573
[whispering] My mirror.
Where is my mirror?
10
00:01:55,658 --> 00:01:56,700
It's not there?
11
00:01:56,784 --> 00:01:59,577
{\an8}Not unless it's suddenly turned invisible.
12
00:01:59,662 --> 00:02:01,622
{\an8}I've been robbed.
13
00:02:03,957 --> 00:02:07,502
-Where is my mirror?
-What?
14
00:02:07,585 --> 00:02:09,963
The magnifying mirror.
The one from my desk.
15
00:02:10,047 --> 00:02:12,424
The one I've seen you use
for your eyebrows.
16
00:02:12,507 --> 00:02:13,759
I don't know.
17
00:02:14,927 --> 00:02:17,262
No one sleeps
when my things go missing.
18
00:02:17,345 --> 00:02:20,683
{\an8}I'm not sleeping.
I can't sleep.
19
00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:25,729
{\an8}Wake up.
My mirror is missing.
20
00:02:25,813 --> 00:02:28,023
We have to live together.
It would be pretty dumb to steal from you.
21
00:02:28,106 --> 00:02:29,942
Like you're all geniuses.
22
00:02:30,943 --> 00:02:32,610
-[snoring]
-Wake up, motorboat.
23
00:02:32,695 --> 00:02:34,571
Please, I didn't go to sleep
until you left for the shower.
24
00:02:34,655 --> 00:02:35,989
I swear,
I kept myself up.
25
00:02:36,073 --> 00:02:38,366
-Where is my mirror?
-On the desk?
26
00:02:38,450 --> 00:02:41,244
She wouldn't steal from you.
She's terrified of you.
27
00:02:42,913 --> 00:02:45,457
Why would I want to look
at myself in the mirror?
28
00:02:46,333 --> 00:02:49,127
Hey, Reznikov.
It's time to make the donuts.
29
00:02:49,211 --> 00:02:51,839
I'm not ready.
And my mirror is missing.
30
00:02:51,922 --> 00:02:54,091
{\an8}I don't give a tiger's testicle.
31
00:02:54,174 --> 00:02:55,633
{\an8}Look, the faster I deliver you,
32
00:02:55,718 --> 00:02:57,594
the faster I can get back
to my mindfulness practice.
33
00:02:57,677 --> 00:02:58,971
So, let's go!
34
00:02:59,054 --> 00:03:00,973
Do you think your time
is more valuable than mine?
35
00:03:01,056 --> 00:03:02,640
{\an8}Fine. Fine.
36
00:03:02,725 --> 00:03:04,935
{\an8}I'll put my face on in the kitchen, huh?
37
00:03:05,018 --> 00:03:06,561
{\an8}[inmate] Shut up! I'm still asleep!
38
00:03:07,855 --> 00:03:09,022
{\an8}Wait.
39
00:03:10,148 --> 00:03:11,649
{\an8}Where's my lip pencil?
40
00:03:11,734 --> 00:03:13,276
{\an8}[whimpers]
41
00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:15,863
{\an8}Where the hell is my lip pencil?
42
00:03:15,946 --> 00:03:17,405
{\an8}Now, Reznikov.
43
00:03:18,406 --> 00:03:22,660
{\an8}Fucking thieves.
I will find you!
44
00:03:22,745 --> 00:03:24,913
[inmate] Shut the fuck up.
45
00:03:26,123 --> 00:03:28,500
Oh, shoot.
She left the light on.
46
00:03:35,799 --> 00:03:36,967
Thank you.
47
00:03:41,930 --> 00:03:43,348
[sobs]
48
00:03:43,431 --> 00:03:44,725
You okay?
49
00:03:46,643 --> 00:03:48,353
Not even a little bit.
50
00:04:05,620 --> 00:04:07,414
[inmates talking indistinctly]
51
00:04:12,002 --> 00:04:14,379
{\an8}I'm not even looking.
I don't care.
52
00:04:15,588 --> 00:04:17,340
{\an8}You're not even that hot.
53
00:04:18,383 --> 00:04:20,593
{\an8}-Wait, maybe you are.
-[Judy whistles]
54
00:04:25,140 --> 00:04:29,227
[Judy] Now this is starting
to feel like overkill.
55
00:04:29,311 --> 00:04:30,395
-You think so?
-[Judy] Mmm.
56
00:04:30,478 --> 00:04:32,230
More like looks could kill.
57
00:04:32,314 --> 00:04:34,607
Check out the stink eye in this place.
58
00:04:34,691 --> 00:04:37,485
{\an8}You know, maybe that's 'cause
there's a boy in the girls' room.
59
00:04:38,736 --> 00:04:41,073
{\an8}These ladies don't seem
too bothered by me.
60
00:04:44,201 --> 00:04:45,202
{\an8}[Judy groans]
61
00:04:45,285 --> 00:04:46,703
{\an8}The bathroom is where
you're the most vulnerable.
62
00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:49,164
{\an8}-[scoffs]
-I mean, haven't you ever seen Psycho?
63
00:04:49,247 --> 00:04:50,623
{\an8}Or read an actuarial table?
64
00:04:50,707 --> 00:04:52,209
{\an8}Yoga Jones ordered this protection.
65
00:04:52,292 --> 00:04:54,837
{\an8}Frankly, I think it was
an overreaction. [chuckles]
66
00:04:54,920 --> 00:04:57,089
{\an8}[singing] ♪ I've been stealing
Them other ladies' pies ♪
67
00:04:57,172 --> 00:04:59,424
{\an8}♪ And, ooh, that was a bust ♪
68
00:04:59,507 --> 00:05:01,844
{\an8}♪ 'Cause them other ladies
Been fakin' when they bakin' ♪
69
00:05:01,927 --> 00:05:03,636
{\an8}♪ Using that store-bought crust ♪
70
00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:08,809
{\an8}♪ But Judy's pies is oh-so-tasty
And I never get my fill ♪
71
00:05:08,892 --> 00:05:09,893
♪ So blame it on... ♪
72
00:05:09,977 --> 00:05:11,436
On the other hand...
73
00:05:11,519 --> 00:05:14,064
[Suzanne continues singing]
74
00:05:16,942 --> 00:05:19,027
{\an8}I'll be, uh, right outside.
75
00:05:19,111 --> 00:05:22,072
{\an8}Oh, hey, you got the new O?
I was reading a good article.
76
00:05:22,155 --> 00:05:25,033
{\an8}Oh, you know,
I think McCullough walked off with that.
77
00:05:25,117 --> 00:05:26,659
{\an8}Oh, here.
78
00:05:27,660 --> 00:05:29,329
{\an8}You want Women's Health?
79
00:05:29,412 --> 00:05:31,289
{\an8}-Thank you.
-Enjoy.
80
00:05:32,916 --> 00:05:36,044
{\an8}Well, I believe those are my eggs.
81
00:05:36,128 --> 00:05:39,089
{\an8}I only took one bite.
It was getting cold.
82
00:05:41,466 --> 00:05:42,717
{\an8}[sighs]
83
00:05:46,972 --> 00:05:48,681
{\an8}You know,
this is getting ridiculous.
84
00:05:48,765 --> 00:05:50,017
{\an8}I can't spend the rest of my time
85
00:05:50,100 --> 00:05:51,977
with some ding-dong like that
following me around.
86
00:05:52,060 --> 00:05:54,646
Isolation perpetuates the rumors.
87
00:05:54,729 --> 00:05:56,481
That you hate black people?
88
00:05:56,564 --> 00:06:00,735
{\an8}Look, it was the '80s, all right?
Everybody was a moron in the '80s.
89
00:06:00,818 --> 00:06:02,487
{\an8}I just want to be able to walk around here
90
00:06:02,570 --> 00:06:05,949
{\an8}without everybody looking at me
like I'm some kind of terrified bigot.
91
00:06:06,033 --> 00:06:08,660
{\an8}Out there is overrated.
92
00:06:08,743 --> 00:06:11,663
{\an8}[inhales sharply]
Why don't we have a TV brought in?
93
00:06:11,746 --> 00:06:13,540
{\an8}Oh, no.
94
00:06:13,623 --> 00:06:16,209
{\an8}You know, I wouldn't wanna risk
95
00:06:16,293 --> 00:06:21,173
sullying your karma, your chi
or whatever with such a base object.
96
00:06:21,256 --> 00:06:23,800
Idiot box. I believe
that's what you called it last week.
97
00:06:23,883 --> 00:06:25,760
Did I?
I don't remember.
98
00:06:25,843 --> 00:06:29,681
Mmm-hmm. And I think you called me
the idiot on the idiot box.
99
00:06:29,764 --> 00:06:31,058
Right?
100
00:06:31,141 --> 00:06:33,643
Well, it's starting
to look like it's true.
101
00:06:33,726 --> 00:06:36,646
And there... there's gotta be
some way to clear the air.
102
00:06:36,729 --> 00:06:38,648
Make reparations.
103
00:06:38,731 --> 00:06:41,193
Forty acres and some eggs.
104
00:06:41,276 --> 00:06:42,902
Why don't you tell them again
105
00:06:42,986 --> 00:06:47,115
how many black friends
you have in your kitchen and your field?
106
00:06:47,199 --> 00:06:50,327
Okay, you shut up,
you PC hippie hypocrite.
107
00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:53,705
I would wager that your last address
before you came here
108
00:06:53,788 --> 00:06:55,790
wasn't exactly in the inner city.
109
00:06:55,873 --> 00:07:00,963
At least I didn't talk to puppets
that used the word "jigaboo."
110
00:07:03,798 --> 00:07:05,675
[Judy] Hmm?
111
00:07:05,758 --> 00:07:07,427
No more eggs for you.
112
00:07:12,682 --> 00:07:15,102
[inmates talking indistinctly]
113
00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:35,413
[woman] An inmate
from Litchfield Federal Prison
114
00:07:35,497 --> 00:07:37,332
is attempting to contact you.
115
00:07:38,583 --> 00:07:40,752
-Cal!
-Piper!
116
00:07:40,835 --> 00:07:44,922
Cal! Cal, you have no idea
how badly I've wanted...
117
00:07:45,007 --> 00:07:46,258
to hear your voice.
118
00:07:46,341 --> 00:07:48,551
Well, would you rather
hear my voice?
119
00:07:48,635 --> 00:07:53,515
Or a pre-war Gibson banjo
that Earl Scruggs played at the Opry?
120
00:07:53,598 --> 00:07:55,183
-Your voice, for sure.
-You're right.
121
00:07:55,267 --> 00:07:58,020
You're right. I haven't earned it yet.
I need to practice more.
122
00:07:58,103 --> 00:08:01,939
So, you got Neri's message,
didn't you?
123
00:08:02,024 --> 00:08:03,191
What?
What message?
124
00:08:03,275 --> 00:08:05,818
Neri sent you a psychic message
to call us.
125
00:08:05,902 --> 00:08:09,197
[stammering] I was skeptical at first,
but, I mean, here you are.
126
00:08:09,281 --> 00:08:11,074
Cal, I've missed you so much.
127
00:08:11,158 --> 00:08:14,911
There's really nobody in here
for me to... talk to right now.
128
00:08:14,995 --> 00:08:16,371
We are pregnant!
129
00:08:18,456 --> 00:08:20,083
You got pregnant in the basement?
130
00:08:21,418 --> 00:08:24,212
[squeals] I mean, we...
we think that it might have
131
00:08:24,296 --> 00:08:28,425
actually happened in the laundry room
or maybe in the dining room.
132
00:08:28,508 --> 00:08:30,468
Um, we're not sure.
133
00:08:30,552 --> 00:08:34,347
Mom has a standing hair appointment,
Tuesdays from 11:00 to 1:00.
134
00:08:34,431 --> 00:08:37,350
And yet, her hair has never changed.
It's a mystery.
135
00:08:37,434 --> 00:08:39,394
I mean, we're not technically
supposed to tell anyone yet,
136
00:08:39,477 --> 00:08:42,439
because it's only eight weeks,
but I don't care, fuck it.
137
00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:43,940
Holy shit.
138
00:08:45,983 --> 00:08:49,196
Wow!
Congratulations.
139
00:08:49,279 --> 00:08:50,822
That's wonderful.
140
00:08:50,905 --> 00:08:53,158
It is pretty cool.
141
00:08:53,241 --> 00:08:55,243
I'm already bonding with the baby.
142
00:08:55,327 --> 00:08:59,747
I talk to him and I sing to him.
In English and in Korean.
143
00:08:59,831 --> 00:09:01,833
Did I tell you
that we're all learning Korean?
144
00:09:01,916 --> 00:09:03,793
Oh, we've got
a whole new business, Pipes.
145
00:09:03,876 --> 00:09:07,339
We ship used clothes over to Korea.
146
00:09:07,422 --> 00:09:09,924
Vintage. Uh, podo suhwag.
147
00:09:10,007 --> 00:09:11,884
I mean, we're killing it.
They can't get enough.
148
00:09:11,968 --> 00:09:15,347
Neri sweeps through
Goodwill, Sally Army, St. V's,
149
00:09:15,430 --> 00:09:18,683
and then she ships it over
to our friend, Helen Hong, in Seoul.
150
00:09:18,766 --> 00:09:21,018
I mean, ever since
the panties dried up,
151
00:09:21,103 --> 00:09:23,188
we were...
we were in real trouble,
152
00:09:23,271 --> 00:09:26,858
but babies bring luck and inspiration.
153
00:09:26,941 --> 00:09:28,401
Yeong-gam.
154
00:09:30,112 --> 00:09:32,864
What do you think
of the name "Clarence," huh?
155
00:09:32,947 --> 00:09:35,575
-Clarence Chapman?
-Do you know it's a boy?
156
00:09:35,658 --> 00:09:37,369
I don't.
Not yet.
157
00:09:37,452 --> 00:09:40,288
But I'm willing it to be a boy
because women are terrifying.
158
00:09:40,372 --> 00:09:42,374
-Yeah.
-Yeah, yeah.
159
00:09:42,457 --> 00:09:47,379
Neri is pretty psyched
and I'm here to buy him his first banjo.
160
00:09:47,462 --> 00:09:48,796
-You can never start it too early.
-[sniffles]
161
00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:51,841
Music education sucks in schools now
which is, like, a total travesty...
162
00:09:51,924 --> 00:09:54,136
-[voice breaking] Cal--
-No, I know. I... I know, I know.
163
00:09:54,219 --> 00:09:58,223
If it is a girl, and it could be,
she will play the fiddle.
164
00:09:59,141 --> 00:10:02,394
So, maybe... maybe I shouldn't
pull the trigger yet on the banjo.
165
00:10:05,730 --> 00:10:07,274
You're gonna be an amazing dad.
166
00:10:07,357 --> 00:10:09,859
I'm totally fucking scared
that I'm gonna fuck it all up.
167
00:10:09,942 --> 00:10:13,446
[sighs] I mean,
you know where we came from.
168
00:10:13,530 --> 00:10:15,948
You are so much warmer,
you are so much lovelier,
169
00:10:16,032 --> 00:10:17,909
and you are so much awesomer.
170
00:10:20,412 --> 00:10:22,872
Plus, you married the anti-Mom.
There's no way.
171
00:10:22,955 --> 00:10:24,499
Stop it.
172
00:10:24,582 --> 00:10:26,834
Wow.
That is so nice of you to say.
173
00:10:27,919 --> 00:10:29,546
I'm really glad you called, Pipes.
174
00:10:32,257 --> 00:10:36,136
I just wanted to check in,
and, um, hear your voice.
175
00:10:36,219 --> 00:10:38,763
[man speaking on PA]
All Whispers employees report to the yard.
176
00:10:38,846 --> 00:10:40,890
Whispers employees to the yard.
177
00:10:41,974 --> 00:10:44,852
Cal, I, uh... I gotta go.
178
00:10:45,812 --> 00:10:47,063
I love you, Daddy.
179
00:10:47,147 --> 00:10:51,193
Okay, yeah, love you.
Bye, Aunty Piper.
180
00:10:52,152 --> 00:10:54,529
-Okay, bye.
-Bye.
181
00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:00,160
[sobs]
182
00:11:02,787 --> 00:11:04,164
[sniffling]
183
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:10,295
[breath trembling]
184
00:11:12,380 --> 00:11:14,632
[man speaking indistinctly on PA]
185
00:11:21,514 --> 00:11:24,058
Looks like you got light bugs.
186
00:11:24,141 --> 00:11:27,479
-Might be an infestation.
-Oh, gee. [chuckles]
187
00:11:27,562 --> 00:11:29,897
I don't know
what to do about that.
188
00:11:29,981 --> 00:11:33,276
You got any advice for me,
Miss Nichols?
189
00:11:33,360 --> 00:11:35,278
Darkness, Miss Morello.
190
00:11:36,238 --> 00:11:39,241
You fight the light with darkness.
191
00:11:39,324 --> 00:11:40,992
Care to visit me on the dark side?
192
00:11:41,075 --> 00:11:45,204
Well, actually, it's Mrs. Muccio now.
193
00:11:45,288 --> 00:11:47,374
Didn't even spring
for the hyphenate, huh?
194
00:11:47,457 --> 00:11:49,376
We're very traditional.
195
00:11:51,419 --> 00:11:53,838
Looks like you might need to do
a little bit of cleaning up in here.
196
00:11:53,921 --> 00:11:56,633
Yeah, yeah.
I'll get to that one later.
197
00:11:58,510 --> 00:12:00,136
That's our stall.
198
00:12:01,679 --> 00:12:03,014
Yeah, I'm aware.
199
00:12:03,097 --> 00:12:04,974
I'm married now.
200
00:12:05,057 --> 00:12:06,393
I took vows.
201
00:12:06,476 --> 00:12:08,102
You know, it's, uh...
202
00:12:08,185 --> 00:12:10,938
it's not cheating
if you're in different zip codes, right?
203
00:12:12,231 --> 00:12:15,234
And, uh, there's no dick.
204
00:12:15,318 --> 00:12:17,487
So... that's a freebie.
205
00:12:17,570 --> 00:12:22,241
It's cheating if I even
think about somebody else.
206
00:12:22,325 --> 00:12:26,120
Lusting in the heart and all that?
Just like Jimmy Carter says.
207
00:12:33,336 --> 00:12:35,463
You're really telling me
you didn't miss me at all?
208
00:12:36,798 --> 00:12:38,383
[whispering] You didn't think about me?
209
00:12:39,926 --> 00:12:41,553
'Cause I sure missed you.
210
00:12:44,347 --> 00:12:45,848
Of course I missed you...
211
00:12:47,434 --> 00:12:50,102
but that was because
I was worried about you.
212
00:12:51,521 --> 00:12:53,189
[man speaking indistinctly on PA]
213
00:12:54,732 --> 00:12:56,401
Look.
214
00:12:56,484 --> 00:13:00,655
Look, there's the little chip in the tile
from when you cut your arm.
215
00:13:00,738 --> 00:13:03,950
Aw, remember you didn't notice
until after your third orgasm?
216
00:13:04,033 --> 00:13:06,869
Okay, no.
No, you are not helping me.
217
00:13:06,953 --> 00:13:09,706
You're making me think about things
I should not be thinking about.
218
00:13:09,789 --> 00:13:12,417
It's not right, Nicky. [sighs]
219
00:13:15,169 --> 00:13:16,504
Where'd you go?
220
00:13:21,676 --> 00:13:23,928
No, stay there. Don't!
221
00:13:24,011 --> 00:13:25,805
[groaning] Leave me alone.
222
00:13:25,888 --> 00:13:27,932
Baby, I'm here.
223
00:13:28,933 --> 00:13:33,020
I can touch you.
You need to be touched.
224
00:13:34,313 --> 00:13:35,898
He can't give that to you.
225
00:13:37,108 --> 00:13:39,611
Uh, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
226
00:13:39,694 --> 00:13:41,363
Okay, no!
227
00:13:41,446 --> 00:13:43,823
Vinny and I,
we have a future.
228
00:13:43,906 --> 00:13:45,450
Sure.
229
00:13:45,533 --> 00:13:46,701
Or you have no future
230
00:13:46,784 --> 00:13:49,496
'cause you're virtual strangers
living in a fantasy world.
231
00:13:50,747 --> 00:13:52,832
And it's gonna shatter
into a million pieces
232
00:13:52,915 --> 00:13:55,877
when the mundane realities
of day-to-day life
233
00:13:55,960 --> 00:14:00,339
intrude on your maiden-in-a-tower,
prince-down-below fairy-tale bullshit.
234
00:14:01,424 --> 00:14:02,634
'Cause it's retarded.
235
00:14:02,717 --> 00:14:05,720
Plus he's probably been banging the single
mom next door the whole time, anyway,
236
00:14:05,803 --> 00:14:08,390
because who can live on fantasy
and promises for that long, right?
237
00:14:08,473 --> 00:14:10,475
People get lonely.
238
00:14:13,645 --> 00:14:15,730
Or not.
Okay?
239
00:14:17,690 --> 00:14:19,233
Maybe it's the real thing.
240
00:14:20,317 --> 00:14:22,737
I've never met the guy.
241
00:14:22,820 --> 00:14:24,947
For all I know,
maybe it's true love, right?
242
00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:28,743
Are you sure he wouldn't get off
on hearing about you with another chick?
243
00:14:30,620 --> 00:14:32,622
[Piscatella] Owens!
[Owens] Here.
244
00:14:32,705 --> 00:14:34,749
[Piscatella] Piendak!
[Piendak] Here.
245
00:14:34,832 --> 00:14:36,543
[Piscatella] Sankey!
[Sankey] Here.
246
00:14:36,626 --> 00:14:37,710
[Piscatella] Watson!
247
00:14:38,795 --> 00:14:41,255
Let me hear
a verbal confirmation, inmate.
248
00:14:41,338 --> 00:14:42,382
[softly] Here.
249
00:14:42,465 --> 00:14:43,758
A little bit louder now!
250
00:14:43,841 --> 00:14:45,217
-[shouts] Here!
-Ow!
251
00:14:45,301 --> 00:14:46,678
-What?
-Nothing, sorry.
252
00:14:46,761 --> 00:14:48,680
My ear was too close to your mouth.
My bad.
253
00:14:48,763 --> 00:14:53,476
Now, ladies, due to the breach in security
at the Whispers factory,
254
00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:56,771
it has been decided
that all employees of Whispers
255
00:14:56,854 --> 00:14:59,315
will be replaced
with more trustworthy inmates.
256
00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:01,067
Wait, you mean
we ain't got jobs no more?
257
00:15:01,150 --> 00:15:02,610
Means you ain't got that job no more.
258
00:15:02,694 --> 00:15:05,447
But lucky for you,
a new opportunity has knocked.
259
00:15:06,406 --> 00:15:10,785
-Welcome to Construction 101.
-[inmates groan]
260
00:15:10,868 --> 00:15:13,621
So, wait, is this a job
or is this a class?
261
00:15:13,705 --> 00:15:15,122
This is vocational training.
262
00:15:15,206 --> 00:15:18,167
Well, uh, paid vocational training?
263
00:15:18,250 --> 00:15:20,628
We was makin' a dollar an hour
at Whispers.
264
00:15:20,712 --> 00:15:24,757
If you are able to master these skills
and get a job once you're released,
265
00:15:24,841 --> 00:15:27,134
-the paycheck could be in your future.
-[indistinct chatter]
266
00:15:27,218 --> 00:15:31,681
But to be clear as crystal, no money.
267
00:15:31,764 --> 00:15:33,349
For whatever this is.
268
00:15:35,101 --> 00:15:36,686
This is a class.
269
00:15:36,769 --> 00:15:38,395
[inmates groan]
270
00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:39,731
[Ouija] Thanks, jefe.
271
00:15:39,814 --> 00:15:42,191
-Hope it was worth it.
-[Janae] Mmm-hmm.
272
00:15:42,274 --> 00:15:43,985
You gonna fill my commissary now?
273
00:15:44,068 --> 00:15:45,778
Hey, back the fuck off.
274
00:15:45,862 --> 00:15:47,822
[Piscatella] Hey, hey!
275
00:15:47,905 --> 00:15:49,406
Eyes up front.
276
00:15:51,117 --> 00:15:54,621
I will now introduce you
to your construction foreman instructor,
277
00:15:54,704 --> 00:15:55,997
Mr. McDonald.
278
00:15:56,080 --> 00:15:58,374
-[inmates whistling]
-He will walk you through safety training
279
00:15:58,458 --> 00:15:59,959
so we can have an efficient
280
00:16:00,042 --> 00:16:02,754
and incident-free
work-learning environment.
281
00:16:02,837 --> 00:16:04,088
[cheering]
282
00:16:07,759 --> 00:16:10,344
Ooh, baby,
I'd let him jackhammer me.
283
00:16:10,427 --> 00:16:13,014
Mmm, I think I'm gonna need
a lot of instruction.
284
00:16:13,097 --> 00:16:15,683
Please let him be straight.
285
00:16:15,767 --> 00:16:17,685
Wrangler jeans.
He's straight.
286
00:16:17,769 --> 00:16:21,731
Yeah, right.
You can keep me safe, Mr. Mackadocious.
287
00:16:21,814 --> 00:16:23,483
Quiet down, inmates.
288
00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:25,985
Mr. Piscatella?
289
00:16:27,236 --> 00:16:30,990
I have a heart condition,
and I don't know if this whole, you know,
290
00:16:31,073 --> 00:16:35,452
manual labor and heat thing...
it's gonna work for me.
291
00:16:35,537 --> 00:16:38,998
I think I got a bad heart, too.
[whispers] Really bad heart.
292
00:16:39,081 --> 00:16:40,667
Yeah, me, too.
293
00:16:40,750 --> 00:16:44,086
Come up here and we'll find you
an appropriate position...
294
00:16:44,170 --> 00:16:45,421
DeMarco.
295
00:16:48,675 --> 00:16:50,342
I know what position I'd like.
296
00:16:50,426 --> 00:16:51,969
-[clicks tongue]
-[inmates cheer]
297
00:16:52,053 --> 00:16:53,680
That's enough, ma'am.
298
00:16:55,014 --> 00:16:59,101
Ladies, safety is number one
on the job site.
299
00:16:59,185 --> 00:17:03,606
And safety comes with confidence
and comfort using tools and equipment.
300
00:17:03,690 --> 00:17:07,777
Confidence and comfort
come from practice and common sense.
301
00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:11,238
I will be your guide and supervisor
as we erect this structure.
302
00:17:11,322 --> 00:17:12,782
He said "erect."
303
00:17:12,865 --> 00:17:14,491
What exactly is this structure?
304
00:17:14,576 --> 00:17:17,036
From the plans I've been given,
it's a giant cube with a roof.
305
00:17:18,037 --> 00:17:21,916
Now, anyone here have
any carpentry or construction experience?
306
00:17:21,999 --> 00:17:23,000
Show of hands?
307
00:17:28,089 --> 00:17:29,882
-I need an apprentice.
-[inmates] Oh, here!
308
00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:35,763
I love your enthusiasm, ladies.
309
00:17:35,847 --> 00:17:39,058
[Piscatella] Let's wait to choose
an apprentice 'til we see who earns it.
310
00:17:39,141 --> 00:17:43,312
Inmates, give us a minute
while we figure out your work assignments.
311
00:17:45,147 --> 00:17:47,316
If we're gonna make anything off of this,
312
00:17:47,399 --> 00:17:49,318
we gotta get that paparazzi pizza dough.
313
00:17:49,401 --> 00:17:50,737
You got to get the phone charged.
314
00:17:50,820 --> 00:17:52,363
Juice up the box.
315
00:17:52,446 --> 00:17:54,031
Juice up the box?
316
00:17:54,115 --> 00:17:55,783
Like a juice box.
317
00:17:57,493 --> 00:18:00,121
Only the juice is electricity
and the box is the--
318
00:18:01,581 --> 00:18:04,709
You called money
"paparazzi pizza dough."
319
00:18:05,793 --> 00:18:09,088
-Okay, fine.
-I'll give you half a point for effort.
320
00:18:10,131 --> 00:18:12,133
Hell, no, you ain't.
This ain't no participation trophy.
321
00:18:12,216 --> 00:18:14,093
Look, that's what's wrong
with this country.
322
00:18:14,176 --> 00:18:16,929
You either score or you miss.
323
00:18:17,013 --> 00:18:19,807
-[backhoe engine stops]
-[backhoe rattling]
324
00:18:21,643 --> 00:18:24,436
God damn it!
We lost the hydraulics!
325
00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:27,982
-Try downshifting!
-[driver] I tried that already.
326
00:18:28,065 --> 00:18:30,192
-Can you fix it?
-I'm not a mechanic.
327
00:18:30,276 --> 00:18:35,489
McDonald, let's put our new trainees
to work while we wait on the fix.
328
00:18:35,572 --> 00:18:38,367
Everyone, grab a shovel
and let's get started.
329
00:18:38,450 --> 00:18:40,369
Uh, shouldn't we finish
going through safety training
330
00:18:40,452 --> 00:18:42,246
-before we get started?
-[Piscatella] You did.
331
00:18:42,329 --> 00:18:45,416
Practice and common sense.
Stay safe.
332
00:18:45,499 --> 00:18:46,793
Let's get to work.
333
00:18:49,295 --> 00:18:50,337
[McDonald] Let's go!
334
00:18:50,421 --> 00:18:52,048
Hard hats, first, please.
335
00:18:52,131 --> 00:18:53,800
How is this educational?
336
00:18:53,883 --> 00:18:58,220
Lesson one, don't do crime
because prison is unpleasant.
337
00:18:59,263 --> 00:19:02,850
Start digging, ladies.
You have a hard hat and a shovel.
338
00:19:12,944 --> 00:19:14,111
Oops!
339
00:19:16,072 --> 00:19:18,825
Silly me.
I'm so clumsy.
340
00:19:22,829 --> 00:19:23,913
Got 'em!
341
00:19:25,331 --> 00:19:27,834
-Let's do this.
-[gasps] What?
342
00:19:27,917 --> 00:19:29,418
Don't hold out on me.
343
00:19:30,461 --> 00:19:31,545
I'm not holdin' nothin'.
344
00:19:31,628 --> 00:19:34,048
But you promised to show me
how to do eye makeup like you do.
345
00:19:34,131 --> 00:19:37,134
[gasps] Oh! That.
346
00:19:37,218 --> 00:19:38,635
Right, yeah, right.
347
00:19:39,595 --> 00:19:41,931
Okay, I've been thinking, though,
you gotta bring your own pencil,
348
00:19:42,014 --> 00:19:44,641
'cause if you use mine, you could get,
like, pinkeye or something.
349
00:19:44,726 --> 00:19:45,977
Do you have pinkeye?
350
00:19:46,060 --> 00:19:47,854
I don't think so,
351
00:19:47,937 --> 00:19:51,065
but I don't know, and you gotta be
really careful around here.
352
00:19:51,148 --> 00:19:53,735
Okay, so listen,
you go to the drug store,
353
00:19:53,818 --> 00:19:56,696
you get yourself
a really good black eyeliner pencil
354
00:19:56,779 --> 00:19:58,030
and then I'll show you everything.
355
00:19:58,114 --> 00:20:00,783
And it doesn't even
have to be expensive, neither.
356
00:20:00,867 --> 00:20:03,619
Maybe pick up a mascara, too.
Uh, the pink one.
357
00:20:04,787 --> 00:20:06,956
And then we'll do
a whole lesson, okay? [chuckles]
358
00:20:07,039 --> 00:20:09,166
-Yeah, okay. [chuckles]
-Okay.
359
00:20:09,250 --> 00:20:10,793
Great, I gotta go.
I'm gonna think about ways
360
00:20:10,877 --> 00:20:14,171
on how to make your eyes really pop
and make you really cute.
361
00:20:31,022 --> 00:20:32,273
Mmm-mmm!
362
00:20:33,190 --> 00:20:34,233
Man.
363
00:20:35,151 --> 00:20:36,778
You know, I don't know
what your secret is, Specs,
364
00:20:36,861 --> 00:20:39,155
but you are looking
even hotter than I remember.
365
00:20:39,238 --> 00:20:41,323
-Suck it, Nichols.
-Come on.
366
00:20:41,407 --> 00:20:42,784
You're single.
I'm single.
367
00:20:42,867 --> 00:20:44,994
The birds are singing.
The grass is soft.
368
00:20:45,077 --> 00:20:47,830
The grass is covered
in off-brand weed killer.
369
00:20:48,580 --> 00:20:50,249
Pretty please?
Okay?
370
00:20:50,332 --> 00:20:53,044
I just spent 94 days in Max
in an eight-bed cell
371
00:20:53,127 --> 00:20:55,421
with, among others,
two random shriekers
372
00:20:55,504 --> 00:20:57,673
and a woman who put her baby
through a dryer cycle.
373
00:20:57,757 --> 00:20:59,550
Oh, that is sexy.
374
00:20:59,633 --> 00:21:01,761
Oh!
Oh, that's nothing.
375
00:21:01,844 --> 00:21:03,679
I learned to shit in front of an audience.
376
00:21:03,763 --> 00:21:05,639
Yeah, of course what you're flushing
377
00:21:05,722 --> 00:21:08,976
is mainly just whatever's left
of your humanity. So...
378
00:21:09,060 --> 00:21:11,062
Yeah, well, it's not like
it's been a fun-fest over here.
379
00:21:11,145 --> 00:21:12,354
Fuck you, Vause.
380
00:21:12,438 --> 00:21:14,190
This place is like a camp.
381
00:21:14,273 --> 00:21:16,067
[stuttering] What happened?
382
00:21:16,150 --> 00:21:18,069
The commissary run out of chocolate chips?
383
00:21:18,152 --> 00:21:20,487
It's been a shitty
couple of months, Nicky.
384
00:21:20,571 --> 00:21:22,865
You're not the only one
that has rough times.
385
00:21:28,579 --> 00:21:30,832
Okay, new plan.
386
00:21:31,833 --> 00:21:35,962
You and me go on
a magic carpet ride to happy town.
387
00:21:36,045 --> 00:21:37,797
Jesus, you've got a one-track mind.
388
00:21:37,880 --> 00:21:41,175
[chuckles] For your information,
I have a two-track mind.
389
00:21:41,258 --> 00:21:43,260
All right,
come join me on track deux.
390
00:21:43,344 --> 00:21:44,595
Look...
391
00:21:44,678 --> 00:21:46,472
you can even keep your clothes on.
392
00:21:47,139 --> 00:21:48,765
Oh, of course, you know,
393
00:21:48,850 --> 00:21:51,477
if you don't need a vacation
from your reality, then, uh...
394
00:21:51,560 --> 00:21:53,395
hey, by all means, decline.
395
00:22:03,322 --> 00:22:05,324
[inmates talking indistinctly]
396
00:22:11,247 --> 00:22:13,165
Hey, smells good.
397
00:22:13,249 --> 00:22:15,417
You leave that stuff in the place?
398
00:22:15,501 --> 00:22:17,044
I need to talk to you about that.
399
00:22:17,128 --> 00:22:18,545
Why?
Something went wrong?
400
00:22:18,629 --> 00:22:20,006
No, no, no, no.
No, it was fine.
401
00:22:20,089 --> 00:22:22,842
-I mean... sorry. I left it.
-[microwave beeping]
402
00:22:22,925 --> 00:22:24,010
It's all fine.
403
00:22:29,932 --> 00:22:31,267
[sighs]
404
00:22:37,856 --> 00:22:41,068
Ooh, you got the shrimp flavor.
That's a good one.
405
00:22:41,986 --> 00:22:44,530
I haven't been...
eating so good lately
406
00:22:44,613 --> 00:22:46,407
'cause I'm so nervous all the time.
407
00:22:46,490 --> 00:22:47,616
Have you tried meditating?
408
00:22:47,699 --> 00:22:49,785
Maria, I need to stop.
409
00:22:50,702 --> 00:22:52,288
I almost got caught today.
410
00:22:52,955 --> 00:22:55,582
I think the key word there is "almost."
411
00:22:56,583 --> 00:22:57,876
Almost don't count.
412
00:22:58,794 --> 00:23:01,672
So, you're gonna calm yourself,
413
00:23:01,755 --> 00:23:04,383
and you're going to keep doing
what you're doing.
414
00:23:04,466 --> 00:23:05,842
And if I don't want to?
415
00:23:07,303 --> 00:23:08,595
Ain't about want.
416
00:23:10,973 --> 00:23:12,474
[sighs]
417
00:23:21,775 --> 00:23:24,028
-[male officer] Keep going!
-[inmates grunting]
418
00:23:37,249 --> 00:23:39,335
Hey, Boo! Are you thirsty?
419
00:23:39,418 --> 00:23:41,378
[Big Boo] Oh, fuck, yeah!
420
00:23:41,462 --> 00:23:44,048
What, is this some kind of
lesbian superpower
421
00:23:44,131 --> 00:23:46,758
that you can fix machines like this,
like a man?
422
00:23:46,842 --> 00:23:49,345
[chuckles] Are you kidding?
423
00:23:49,428 --> 00:23:51,555
-Oh!
-[chuckles]
424
00:23:52,306 --> 00:23:53,349
Ah.
425
00:23:54,516 --> 00:23:57,103
-I got no fucking clue what I'm doing.
-You don't?
426
00:23:57,186 --> 00:23:59,146
I figure if I loosen and tighten
the bolt repeatedly,
427
00:23:59,230 --> 00:24:01,815
it eats up the whole fucking day
and keeps me out of the trenches.
428
00:24:01,898 --> 00:24:03,359
That's... that's pretty smart.
429
00:24:03,442 --> 00:24:05,736
Now, scram, girl.
You're blowing my cover.
430
00:24:05,819 --> 00:24:08,364
Oh, no, no, no.
It's totally cool.
431
00:24:08,447 --> 00:24:11,117
They assigned me to learn from you,
432
00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:14,620
just in case if anything breaks,
somebody else knows how to fix it.
433
00:24:15,621 --> 00:24:19,041
'Cause, like, what if you get let out...
or you're busy?
434
00:24:20,209 --> 00:24:21,543
How do you like them apples?
435
00:24:21,627 --> 00:24:23,587
All About Eve, huh?
436
00:24:23,670 --> 00:24:24,921
Yeah, yeah.
437
00:24:25,006 --> 00:24:28,009
'Cause Adam... Adam told her
not to eat that apple.
438
00:24:28,092 --> 00:24:31,928
And she ate it, she became wise.
Just like me.
439
00:24:33,930 --> 00:24:35,391
Yeah.
Tell you what.
440
00:24:35,474 --> 00:24:37,893
Come on under here,
I'll show you what we're doing.
441
00:24:46,110 --> 00:24:47,319
Keep working, inmate.
442
00:24:51,698 --> 00:24:54,326
Oh, Jesus, you cutting yourself now?
443
00:24:55,077 --> 00:24:56,745
I thought I was the emo one.
444
00:24:56,828 --> 00:24:59,040
-What?
-You're bleeding.
445
00:25:00,749 --> 00:25:02,000
Fuck.
446
00:25:02,084 --> 00:25:05,879
I used to cut myself.
But in, like, cool designs.
447
00:25:06,922 --> 00:25:09,091
She should cut herself.
448
00:25:09,175 --> 00:25:10,842
We're all out of work because of her.
449
00:25:10,926 --> 00:25:12,678
[Blake] If you can't dig
and talk at the same time,
450
00:25:12,761 --> 00:25:14,180
then you dig and shut up.
451
00:25:14,263 --> 00:25:17,058
Shovels in the dirt.
Now!
452
00:25:26,525 --> 00:25:28,485
And don't touch 'em for a half an hour.
453
00:25:28,569 --> 00:25:31,447
I'm not doing free fixing
'cause you were a moron
454
00:25:31,530 --> 00:25:33,324
and felt like seeing if they were dry.
455
00:25:33,407 --> 00:25:37,244
Okay, I said it was a mistake.
Some lint got stuck to it.
456
00:25:37,328 --> 00:25:38,912
Pa' fuera.
457
00:25:45,502 --> 00:25:47,088
Got time for a walk-in?
458
00:25:48,672 --> 00:25:50,006
Don't expect a family discount.
459
00:25:58,932 --> 00:26:00,267
You been chewing on these again?
460
00:26:00,351 --> 00:26:02,186
Some of us got a lot on our minds.
461
00:26:02,269 --> 00:26:04,271
You don't think I got a lot on my mind?
462
00:26:04,355 --> 00:26:07,566
I gotta figure out a place
to set up the salon out there.
463
00:26:07,649 --> 00:26:10,152
I gotta hire girls to help me.
464
00:26:10,236 --> 00:26:12,238
Maybe a receptionist with great nails
465
00:26:12,321 --> 00:26:14,656
so that everyone can see the work
right when they walk in.
466
00:26:14,740 --> 00:26:16,617
What the fuck are you talking about?
467
00:26:16,700 --> 00:26:18,369
I'm talkin' about my future.
468
00:26:18,452 --> 00:26:20,704
You gotta get your cosmetology license.
469
00:26:22,206 --> 00:26:23,499
You gotta rent a place.
470
00:26:23,582 --> 00:26:25,209
Fill it with chairs and foot buckets
471
00:26:25,292 --> 00:26:27,711
and get the machine
that kills the germs on the tools.
472
00:26:27,794 --> 00:26:29,296
Where you gonna get money
for all that?
473
00:26:29,380 --> 00:26:31,548
You lucky if you could afford
a few bottles of polish.
474
00:26:32,924 --> 00:26:34,718
Got a lot on your mind.
475
00:26:34,801 --> 00:26:36,845
[scoffs] Got some nerve.
476
00:26:38,389 --> 00:26:40,307
You got make-believe on your mind.
477
00:26:49,191 --> 00:26:50,609
You know, maybe you can...
478
00:26:52,653 --> 00:26:54,905
start in someone else's place.
479
00:26:54,988 --> 00:26:57,241
Learn the business
and take over that shit.
480
00:26:59,535 --> 00:27:01,036
You'll run it in no time.
481
00:27:03,997 --> 00:27:05,707
You're like that bug
that takes over the other bug
482
00:27:05,791 --> 00:27:07,501
and controls it and everything.
483
00:27:09,211 --> 00:27:11,713
And you're really good
at figuring out business stuff, so...
484
00:27:13,840 --> 00:27:15,050
What color you want?
485
00:27:20,389 --> 00:27:21,598
[sighs]
486
00:27:25,269 --> 00:27:29,565
Oh, CO Bayley, I asked you politely
to please wait outside.
487
00:27:29,648 --> 00:27:30,899
Miss Washington is a friend.
488
00:27:30,982 --> 00:27:33,819
Right, but I'm your shadow, you know.
489
00:27:33,902 --> 00:27:37,030
[imitating The Shadow] Who knows
what evil lurks in the hearts of man?
490
00:27:37,113 --> 00:27:39,491
The Shadow knows! [cackling]
491
00:27:42,869 --> 00:27:45,372
Been listening to a retro radio podcast.
492
00:27:46,457 --> 00:27:47,541
Podcast?
No, okay.
493
00:27:48,584 --> 00:27:50,711
All right.
I'll, uh, I'll wait outside.
494
00:27:50,794 --> 00:27:53,464
Ooh, The Wise Man's Fear.
495
00:27:53,547 --> 00:27:56,758
I loved The Name of the Wind.
Can I, uh... Can I borrow that?
496
00:27:56,842 --> 00:27:58,176
Knock yourself out.
497
00:28:04,099 --> 00:28:05,226
What's goin' on with that?
498
00:28:05,309 --> 00:28:06,477
-[door closes]
-[chuckles]
499
00:28:07,394 --> 00:28:10,397
I... I've been assigned protection
and it's driving me bananas.
500
00:28:10,481 --> 00:28:14,485
Now... I know your friends
are frustrated with me,
501
00:28:14,568 --> 00:28:17,488
but surely we can find some way
to work that out.
502
00:28:17,571 --> 00:28:19,865
Wait. Wait, wait.
503
00:28:19,948 --> 00:28:21,950
You think the black girls
are gonna jump you?
504
00:28:22,033 --> 00:28:25,662
Well, uh, the crazy one has been
taunting me with songs from the show.
505
00:28:25,746 --> 00:28:27,539
And the big one with the puffy hair,
506
00:28:27,623 --> 00:28:30,667
she cornered me in the hallway
with the... gal with the head wrap.
507
00:28:30,751 --> 00:28:31,960
I didn't make that up.
508
00:28:32,043 --> 00:28:34,963
[sighs] It's not like you wouldn't
deserve it after that chitlin' mess.
509
00:28:36,257 --> 00:28:37,466
[sighs]
510
00:28:40,344 --> 00:28:41,553
They were puppets.
511
00:28:41,637 --> 00:28:43,972
Yeah, puppets that reinforce stereotypes
512
00:28:44,055 --> 00:28:46,642
that black people
are dumb and superstitious.
513
00:28:46,725 --> 00:28:50,479
They steal and they love
being indentured servants.
514
00:28:50,562 --> 00:28:53,023
And don't get me started
on the cannibalism.
515
00:28:53,106 --> 00:28:54,566
I gotta tell you,
it's disappointing.
516
00:28:54,650 --> 00:28:57,944
All right, look,
I sincerely regret it.
517
00:28:58,028 --> 00:29:00,906
But they did promote fresh food.
I mean, there was a message.
518
00:29:02,157 --> 00:29:03,867
Oh, all right.
519
00:29:03,950 --> 00:29:06,077
Listen, I'm gonna tell you the truth.
520
00:29:06,161 --> 00:29:08,539
I did a lot of blow back
in the early '80s,
521
00:29:08,622 --> 00:29:11,250
and it kept me thin and awake,
522
00:29:11,333 --> 00:29:13,168
but it didn't do much
for my cultural sensitivity,
523
00:29:13,252 --> 00:29:16,338
or my bank account,
or my gynecological health.
524
00:29:16,422 --> 00:29:19,591
Now, the chips fell,
I eventually moved on.
525
00:29:19,675 --> 00:29:21,343
And here I am.
526
00:29:23,011 --> 00:29:25,055
But it can get lonely, you know?
527
00:29:25,138 --> 00:29:27,558
I'm... I'm trying to put
a brave face on it,
528
00:29:27,641 --> 00:29:30,977
but to tell you the truth,
I could use some friends.
529
00:29:31,061 --> 00:29:34,356
Other than a skinny hippie
always in crisis.
530
00:29:35,357 --> 00:29:36,733
You know,
it's hard enough being in here
531
00:29:36,817 --> 00:29:38,735
without feelin' everybody hates me.
532
00:29:42,739 --> 00:29:46,327
It ever occur to you
that it's racist to assume
533
00:29:46,410 --> 00:29:49,371
that black people are gonna
beat you up for bein' racist?
534
00:29:49,455 --> 00:29:52,874
And you have a good point there.
Right, all right, look,
535
00:29:52,958 --> 00:29:54,626
I'm tryin'.
536
00:29:54,710 --> 00:29:57,170
I mean, maybe I am a racist.
Maybe I'm just too stupid to know it,
537
00:29:57,253 --> 00:30:01,300
but shit, I am the friendliest racist
that you are ever gonna meet,
538
00:30:01,383 --> 00:30:04,260
-so can't we all just get along?
-[scoffs]
539
00:30:07,138 --> 00:30:08,181
[sighs]
540
00:30:08,264 --> 00:30:11,727
All right. All right, I'll talk to 'em.
See what's up.
541
00:30:11,810 --> 00:30:14,438
Great, thank you. Thank you.
I really appreciate it.
542
00:30:14,521 --> 00:30:16,315
You are one of the good ones.
543
00:30:18,525 --> 00:30:22,028
No, I meant that as in people in general.
544
00:30:22,112 --> 00:30:23,238
Just...
545
00:30:23,322 --> 00:30:24,531
Shh.
546
00:30:41,297 --> 00:30:42,758
[Nicky giggling]
547
00:30:44,300 --> 00:30:45,969
[Nicky] She saw me!
548
00:30:46,052 --> 00:30:47,388
Nicky?
549
00:30:50,849 --> 00:30:51,892
Nicky?
550
00:30:57,939 --> 00:30:59,315
-[Nicky yells]
-[both laughing]
551
00:30:59,400 --> 00:31:00,734
What are you doing?
552
00:31:00,817 --> 00:31:02,653
Hey, Bummer Chapman,
553
00:31:02,736 --> 00:31:05,697
[chuckling] get the fuck down
or fuck the fuck off.
554
00:31:05,781 --> 00:31:07,616
[sing-song] Bum, bum-bum, bum, bummer.
555
00:31:07,699 --> 00:31:09,368
My tongue feels delightful.
556
00:31:09,451 --> 00:31:11,077
-[Nicky] Hey!
-[laughing]
557
00:31:11,161 --> 00:31:12,245
[Piper] Ow!
558
00:31:12,328 --> 00:31:13,329
Argh!
559
00:31:14,498 --> 00:31:15,541
Shit!
560
00:31:15,624 --> 00:31:18,419
Psst! You know,
from this angle,
561
00:31:18,502 --> 00:31:20,671
your nose hairs are pretty prominent, no?
562
00:31:20,754 --> 00:31:21,797
-Oh, my God.
-Look at that.
563
00:31:21,880 --> 00:31:23,757
-Well, she used to trim them.
-[Piper sighs]
564
00:31:23,840 --> 00:31:26,009
You are really letting yourself go,
Chapman.
565
00:31:26,092 --> 00:31:28,470
Are you two crazy?
What the fuck are you doing?
566
00:31:28,554 --> 00:31:30,346
[Nicky] It's a weekly meeting, okay,
567
00:31:30,431 --> 00:31:33,016
for the morally morose
and successfully challenged.
568
00:31:33,099 --> 00:31:34,184
So we're just going back and forth
569
00:31:34,267 --> 00:31:37,228
and, uh, talking about
all the truly dreadful, horrible shit
570
00:31:37,312 --> 00:31:39,314
that we have to slog through
on a daily basis--
571
00:31:39,398 --> 00:31:41,775
-And we're smoking crack.
-Oh, yeah! That, too. [clears throat]
572
00:31:41,858 --> 00:31:43,569
Are you two fucking serious?
573
00:31:43,652 --> 00:31:45,571
While not my first choice,
574
00:31:45,654 --> 00:31:47,698
crack in small amounts
is actually good for you.
575
00:31:47,781 --> 00:31:49,825
It's gotten a bad rap over the years.
I don't even...
576
00:31:49,908 --> 00:31:51,284
-[inhales sharply]
-Yeah, yeah.
577
00:31:51,367 --> 00:31:53,328
Drug beggars
can't be drug choosers, you know.
578
00:31:53,412 --> 00:31:56,998
Perfect. So you guys
are cracked out of your minds.
579
00:31:57,082 --> 00:31:58,166
Hmm.
580
00:31:59,751 --> 00:32:00,794
[Nicky inhales] Ah!
581
00:32:00,877 --> 00:32:01,962
[exhales heavily]
582
00:32:03,213 --> 00:32:04,465
[sighs]
583
00:32:05,215 --> 00:32:06,758
And you can be, too.
Here.
584
00:32:07,426 --> 00:32:09,720
Uh, full disclosure,
that crack's been up someone's ass.
585
00:32:09,803 --> 00:32:11,972
-Probably Angie's.
-Oh, definitely Angie's.
586
00:32:12,055 --> 00:32:15,058
Yeah, I traded her a lipstick for it.
[sniffs]
587
00:32:15,141 --> 00:32:17,519
[Alex] Here you go.
[Nicky] And don't worry, Piper.
588
00:32:17,603 --> 00:32:20,606
It's sterilized by the flame.
589
00:32:22,107 --> 00:32:23,859
[giggling]
590
00:32:23,942 --> 00:32:25,360
[breathes heavily]
591
00:32:28,905 --> 00:32:30,365
Fuck it.
592
00:32:31,282 --> 00:32:33,994
Whoa! Seriously?
593
00:32:34,077 --> 00:32:35,286
Why would you offer it to me,
594
00:32:35,370 --> 00:32:37,038
if you weren't actually
gonna share it with me?
595
00:32:38,331 --> 00:32:41,417
[stammering] No, I'm just... surprised.
596
00:32:41,502 --> 00:32:42,919
Well, don't be.
597
00:32:45,797 --> 00:32:47,090
Hand it over.
598
00:32:51,720 --> 00:32:53,221
Okay, so, what do I do?
599
00:32:53,304 --> 00:32:56,850
Now breathe in.
Real deep.
600
00:32:58,393 --> 00:32:59,645
[inhales deeply]
601
00:33:05,609 --> 00:33:07,778
[Nicky] Real deep, hold it!
602
00:33:15,994 --> 00:33:17,287
[exhales]
603
00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:23,168
Wow.
604
00:33:24,545 --> 00:33:25,629
Wow.
605
00:33:25,712 --> 00:33:26,963
Take it easy. [chuckles]
606
00:33:27,047 --> 00:33:29,716
Take it easy? Fuck that!
I was branded, okay?
607
00:33:35,681 --> 00:33:37,432
Man, I did not see that coming.
608
00:33:37,516 --> 00:33:38,600
Holy shit!
609
00:33:39,518 --> 00:33:40,686
You're a Nazi now?
610
00:33:40,769 --> 00:33:42,437
Not a Nazi.
I think I'm a Nazi sympathizer.
611
00:33:42,521 --> 00:33:43,897
I think that was the message.
612
00:33:43,980 --> 00:33:45,106
I brought this on myself.
613
00:33:45,190 --> 00:33:46,775
This is what I've become.
This is what I've become.
614
00:33:46,858 --> 00:33:49,485
This is what I've fucking become,
you guys.
615
00:33:49,570 --> 00:33:50,821
How do I come back from this?
616
00:33:50,904 --> 00:33:52,781
I sent Stella down the hill.
Why did I have to do that?
617
00:33:52,864 --> 00:33:54,115
She stole your money.
618
00:33:55,075 --> 00:33:56,743
I was acquainted with her in Max.
619
00:33:56,827 --> 00:33:58,704
My parents didn't teach me
to be like this.
620
00:34:01,081 --> 00:34:02,958
What I did to Maria...
621
00:34:03,041 --> 00:34:04,835
I didn't feel bad.
622
00:34:04,918 --> 00:34:06,086
I didn't think twice.
623
00:34:06,169 --> 00:34:07,170
I just...
624
00:34:08,338 --> 00:34:09,590
went too far.
625
00:34:11,382 --> 00:34:12,634
I always go too far.
626
00:34:17,347 --> 00:34:19,474
I always go too fucking far.
627
00:34:23,019 --> 00:34:25,146
And I can't fucking stop it.
628
00:34:25,230 --> 00:34:26,982
You're not the worst person
in here, Piper.
629
00:34:28,483 --> 00:34:31,236
I think that I've been trying
to win prison.
630
00:34:34,948 --> 00:34:37,158
And I've destroyed people's lives.
631
00:34:38,118 --> 00:34:40,161
[sighs] Gimme that shit again.
632
00:34:40,245 --> 00:34:42,038
-Yeah.
-Gimme that.
633
00:34:42,122 --> 00:34:43,289
[clears throat]
634
00:34:43,373 --> 00:34:44,540
[inhales deeply]
635
00:34:58,304 --> 00:35:00,348
I killed someone.
636
00:35:02,308 --> 00:35:05,103
[laughing]
Fuck, man.
637
00:35:05,186 --> 00:35:06,312
[chuckles]
638
00:35:06,396 --> 00:35:08,649
[chuckles] What, by accident?
639
00:35:09,482 --> 00:35:11,985
No. No, I killed him.
640
00:35:13,695 --> 00:35:14,780
On purpose.
641
00:35:15,906 --> 00:35:17,532
[laughing] Fuck...
642
00:35:17,616 --> 00:35:20,243
Shut up, shut up, shut up.
643
00:35:20,326 --> 00:35:22,495
What? How?
644
00:35:22,578 --> 00:35:24,956
That's impossible.
You couldn't do that. I know you.
645
00:35:25,040 --> 00:35:28,919
Last month.
Kubra sent someone in here to kill me.
646
00:35:30,045 --> 00:35:31,672
Like I said he would.
647
00:35:33,339 --> 00:35:35,050
I mean, in here?
648
00:35:36,384 --> 00:35:39,220
-Fuckin' A.
-How?
649
00:35:39,304 --> 00:35:40,931
Alex, what did you do with the body?
650
00:35:41,014 --> 00:35:42,557
[chuckles]
651
00:35:44,059 --> 00:35:45,852
You're sitting on him.
652
00:35:48,647 --> 00:35:52,025
Parts of him.
I mean, he's all over. [sobbing]
653
00:35:55,111 --> 00:35:56,446
Oh, God.
654
00:35:58,364 --> 00:36:00,200
[sobbing] Stop.
655
00:36:05,831 --> 00:36:09,793
Look, just because
I sit behind a desk all day
656
00:36:09,876 --> 00:36:12,713
does not mean
your job is harder than mine.
657
00:36:14,339 --> 00:36:16,341
As a matter of fact, it does.
658
00:36:16,424 --> 00:36:20,053
You dig a hole for four hours
and tell us if your job is harder.
659
00:36:20,136 --> 00:36:25,475
Do you know how complicated phones
have gotten since we've been inside?
660
00:36:25,558 --> 00:36:27,185
As complicated
as findin' chargers for them?
661
00:36:27,268 --> 00:36:29,771
[Taystee] I'm tryin'.
Caputo's got a different brand going on.
662
00:36:29,855 --> 00:36:32,691
There go my girl.
P, please tell these bitches
663
00:36:32,774 --> 00:36:35,944
that my job
is just as hard as diggin' a ditch.
664
00:36:36,027 --> 00:36:37,988
-It's not.
-[both] Ah!
665
00:36:39,572 --> 00:36:42,951
Look, why y'all trying
to beat up Judy King?
666
00:36:43,034 --> 00:36:44,077
Because she racist.
667
00:36:44,160 --> 00:36:46,788
Why would we beat up an old white lady?
668
00:36:46,872 --> 00:36:48,331
[scoffs] One pop and she down.
669
00:36:48,414 --> 00:36:50,000
And it would ruin the photo.
670
00:36:50,083 --> 00:36:52,002
Ain't nobody trying
to beat down Judy King.
671
00:36:52,085 --> 00:36:53,795
-Who told you that?
-She did.
672
00:36:53,879 --> 00:36:55,630
She told me y'all chased her
down the hallway
673
00:36:55,714 --> 00:36:58,049
and Crazy Eyes
was singing like a murder doll.
674
00:36:58,133 --> 00:36:59,384
Wait, what photo?
What are you--
675
00:36:59,467 --> 00:37:00,927
We're trying to get a picture.
676
00:37:02,053 --> 00:37:04,514
-A picture of what?
-Of Judy King.
677
00:37:04,597 --> 00:37:06,557
That's it?
678
00:37:06,641 --> 00:37:08,810
-Just a picture?
-Just a picture.
679
00:37:12,647 --> 00:37:15,441
-[inmates grunt]
-[indistinct chatter]
680
00:37:26,661 --> 00:37:28,079
[sighs]
681
00:37:29,289 --> 00:37:32,751
Chapman? Wow.
You look even worse than this morning.
682
00:37:32,834 --> 00:37:34,795
Are you sure
you don't wanna go to medical?
683
00:37:34,878 --> 00:37:37,213
No, this crash...
684
00:37:37,297 --> 00:37:38,631
is bad.
685
00:37:38,714 --> 00:37:42,093
Just processing a lot of stuff right now.
686
00:37:42,177 --> 00:37:45,721
Ooh. Did you have diarrhea?
You need to stay hydrated.
687
00:37:52,645 --> 00:37:56,566
I wanna say, you're all doing a great job.
Keep it up.
688
00:37:56,649 --> 00:37:59,069
Bet you don't have that problem.
689
00:37:59,152 --> 00:38:00,821
-[inmates laugh]
-Right.
690
00:38:00,904 --> 00:38:02,989
You hear there's a time machine
in laundry?
691
00:38:03,073 --> 00:38:05,450
Oh, yeah, and there's a fountain of youth
in the ghetto toilet.
692
00:38:06,409 --> 00:38:08,161
[McDonald] Yeah, blue helmet.
693
00:38:08,244 --> 00:38:09,579
Do any y'all want water?
694
00:38:09,662 --> 00:38:12,457
You know, if that shit was true,
I'd go back and see my dead mom.
695
00:38:12,540 --> 00:38:14,459
Tell her not to date
the guy that killed her.
696
00:38:14,542 --> 00:38:17,462
I'd go back and not end up
in this fucking place.
697
00:38:17,545 --> 00:38:21,424
Y'all ever think about, like,
going back and killing Hitler?
698
00:38:21,507 --> 00:38:23,634
Or maybe I'd go back,
raise Hitler right.
699
00:38:23,718 --> 00:38:27,347
You know, give him lots of love
and encourage his artistic side,
700
00:38:27,430 --> 00:38:29,557
try to be a good mom figure to him.
701
00:38:29,640 --> 00:38:31,935
Maybe he'd have less anger issues.
702
00:38:33,519 --> 00:38:36,439
I'd go back and tell him
to seize the Suez Canal early on.
703
00:38:36,522 --> 00:38:38,274
That'd secure
most of the Mediterranean,
704
00:38:38,358 --> 00:38:41,236
giving the Third Reich easy access to oil.
705
00:38:45,490 --> 00:38:48,118
[inmate 1]
I can't. They need it over here.
706
00:38:48,201 --> 00:38:50,203
[inmate 2 grunts]
707
00:38:51,955 --> 00:38:54,707
Where would you go,
back in time?
708
00:38:54,790 --> 00:38:56,334
-Me?
-Yeah.
709
00:38:56,417 --> 00:38:58,628
Uh... well, summer of '99,
710
00:38:58,711 --> 00:39:01,756
I was supposed to see Judas Priest
at, uh, Ralph Wilson Stadium,
711
00:39:01,840 --> 00:39:04,009
but my friend, Champ Silvers,
712
00:39:04,092 --> 00:39:07,553
he challenged me to drink
a dirty 30 pack in the parking lot.
713
00:39:07,637 --> 00:39:08,679
Of Coors Light.
714
00:39:08,763 --> 00:39:10,265
And, uh, I puked everywhere.
715
00:39:10,348 --> 00:39:12,558
I never even got in to see
Rob Halford on stage.
716
00:39:13,476 --> 00:39:15,770
-Regrets, you know?
-Yeah.
717
00:39:18,273 --> 00:39:20,441
[Piscatella] Put some tape on it.
It's all right.
718
00:39:20,525 --> 00:39:22,152
-[both moaning]
-[Franny] I'm telling you, Lorna,
719
00:39:22,235 --> 00:39:24,029
if I would have known
Jack was gonna try something,
720
00:39:24,112 --> 00:39:25,613
I would've locked the door.
721
00:39:25,696 --> 00:39:27,323
The kid's got unusual sleep patterns.
722
00:39:27,407 --> 00:39:29,742
I look up, the doors open
and there's Tommy.
723
00:39:29,825 --> 00:39:31,702
And his eyes are going, "What?"
724
00:39:31,786 --> 00:39:33,955
And he makes a noise, "Oh."
725
00:39:34,039 --> 00:39:35,665
[chuckles] Oh, my goodness.
726
00:39:35,748 --> 00:39:37,458
And you and Jack,
you just kept going?
727
00:39:37,542 --> 00:39:38,960
Oh, yeah, basically.
728
00:39:39,044 --> 00:39:42,255
I said, "Tommy, go back to your room,
your mommy and daddy are making love."
729
00:39:42,338 --> 00:39:43,548
[laughs]
730
00:39:43,631 --> 00:39:46,384
Well, I guess at that age,
he doesn't know what that means.
731
00:39:46,467 --> 00:39:48,344
I hardly know what it means at my age.
732
00:39:48,428 --> 00:39:50,763
Jack and I are like ships in the night.
733
00:39:50,846 --> 00:39:53,391
That's why I didn't stop
when I saw the kid there.
734
00:39:53,474 --> 00:39:56,937
Yeah, well, Vinny and I
just had the honeymoon, so...
735
00:39:57,020 --> 00:39:58,939
You know what Tommy said last week?
736
00:39:59,022 --> 00:40:00,731
He says, "I'm never getting married."
737
00:40:00,815 --> 00:40:02,525
I said, "Well, never's a long time."
738
00:40:02,608 --> 00:40:06,279
He says, "I don't want some girl
spending all my money."
739
00:40:06,362 --> 00:40:07,948
He don't get that mouth from me.
740
00:40:11,076 --> 00:40:14,412
Franny, I...
I think Vinny's cheating on me.
741
00:40:14,495 --> 00:40:17,958
Oh, Lorn, you don't know that.
742
00:40:18,041 --> 00:40:20,961
From what you told me,
he don't sound like the type.
743
00:40:21,044 --> 00:40:25,465
He hasn't visited in weeks.
We barely even talk on the phone.
744
00:40:25,548 --> 00:40:27,675
Honey, you're letting your mind
run away with you.
745
00:40:27,758 --> 00:40:29,552
I'm sure it's nothing.
You gotta trust.
746
00:40:29,635 --> 00:40:31,930
-I gotta know.
-Then you gotta ask.
747
00:40:32,013 --> 00:40:34,057
What if I don't believe him?
I can't live with that.
748
00:40:34,140 --> 00:40:35,725
That's marriage.
749
00:40:35,808 --> 00:40:39,312
You think I don't wonder where Jack's been
when he comes home after 11:00
750
00:40:39,395 --> 00:40:40,730
and says he's been "bowling"?
751
00:40:40,813 --> 00:40:43,399
You get to see Jack every day.
752
00:40:43,984 --> 00:40:45,026
[sighs]
753
00:40:45,110 --> 00:40:48,863
Honey, will you just go...
visit him for me?
754
00:40:48,947 --> 00:40:51,574
-What, like, at his house?
-Mmm-hmm.
755
00:40:51,657 --> 00:40:53,784
What good will that do?
756
00:40:53,868 --> 00:40:57,413
Lorna, this is the kinda garbage
that got you in here.
757
00:40:57,497 --> 00:41:00,875
[voice breaking] No, no.
He is family.
758
00:41:00,959 --> 00:41:02,210
And I don't mean like that.
759
00:41:02,293 --> 00:41:04,254
I... I mean,
760
00:41:04,337 --> 00:41:05,964
I mean, just get to know him a little.
761
00:41:06,047 --> 00:41:09,217
-He's your brother, for Christ's sake!
-[groans]
762
00:41:09,300 --> 00:41:12,095
Please, I'm begging you!
You know I would do this for you.
763
00:41:12,178 --> 00:41:14,305
I would do this for you!
764
00:41:14,389 --> 00:41:18,184
I just can't live thinking that he's using
some other housewife's oven mitt.
765
00:41:20,728 --> 00:41:21,896
-[crying]
-All right.
766
00:41:23,564 --> 00:41:25,608
[chuckles] I'll go to his house.
767
00:41:25,691 --> 00:41:29,195
Thank you so much.
I love you, my sister.
768
00:41:29,279 --> 00:41:30,530
I love you.
769
00:41:37,287 --> 00:41:38,496
Uh... [clears throat]
770
00:41:41,457 --> 00:41:43,668
-You got an appointment?
-[Nicky] Uh-uh.
771
00:41:43,751 --> 00:41:45,003
Walk-in.
772
00:41:46,129 --> 00:41:48,923
-Is that okay?
-That depends.
773
00:42:03,229 --> 00:42:04,397
Take a seat.
774
00:42:11,112 --> 00:42:13,073
That's a lot of hair.
775
00:42:13,156 --> 00:42:16,284
Are we really playing
Barbie Styling Head here? [stutters]
776
00:42:16,367 --> 00:42:18,619
You know, I got places to be. So...
777
00:42:19,620 --> 00:42:20,996
Updo it is.
778
00:42:22,748 --> 00:42:25,876
Ow. Yeah, that's nice.
You really know what you're doing, huh?
779
00:42:25,960 --> 00:42:27,878
Fabulous.
780
00:42:27,962 --> 00:42:31,716
Yeah...
I'm like a real Audrey Hepburn, huh?
781
00:42:33,008 --> 00:42:34,469
Thank you.
782
00:42:40,308 --> 00:42:42,017
Can you do that somewhere else?
783
00:42:45,480 --> 00:42:47,440
You can paint nails anywhere.
784
00:42:47,523 --> 00:42:49,192
Of course.
785
00:42:49,275 --> 00:42:51,277
I finally find a job I'm good at.
786
00:42:51,361 --> 00:42:52,820
Turns out to be a drug front.
787
00:42:55,615 --> 00:42:58,118
I got two days left in this shithole.
788
00:42:58,201 --> 00:42:59,577
I can't screw it up.
789
00:43:01,412 --> 00:43:03,539
Then don't screw it up.
790
00:43:06,209 --> 00:43:07,335
[scoffs]
791
00:43:17,470 --> 00:43:19,514
[inmates talking indistinctly]
792
00:43:28,063 --> 00:43:29,815
How's everything looking here?
793
00:43:29,899 --> 00:43:31,817
Oh, you mean this? [scoffs]
794
00:43:31,901 --> 00:43:34,112
-She's totally fucking dead.
-Oh, yeah?
795
00:43:34,195 --> 00:43:36,322
I mean, I can't get her to start at all.
796
00:43:36,406 --> 00:43:38,073
-You wanna give it a shot?
-Yeah.
797
00:43:38,158 --> 00:43:39,450
All right.
798
00:43:42,495 --> 00:43:44,622
-Whoa!
-[grunting] Here you go, man.
799
00:43:49,169 --> 00:43:51,962
Well, first off, you needed
to have it in neutral to restart it.
800
00:43:52,046 --> 00:43:54,215
-Uh-huh.
-It looks like it just overheated.
801
00:43:54,299 --> 00:43:56,759
-I see.
-Yeah, should work fine now.
802
00:43:56,842 --> 00:43:58,469
So if it conks out,
let it cool,
803
00:43:58,553 --> 00:44:01,389
put it in neutral, restart it.
Easy fix.
804
00:44:01,472 --> 00:44:03,891
Huh! Listen, um...
805
00:44:05,226 --> 00:44:07,061
if anyone should ask,
806
00:44:07,145 --> 00:44:09,814
could you make it sound
way more complicated than that?
807
00:44:11,857 --> 00:44:13,151
[engine starts]
808
00:44:31,711 --> 00:44:33,338
[inmates talking indistinctly]
809
00:44:35,005 --> 00:44:38,301
Man, oh, man, I'm gonna be
so fucking sore tomorrow. [sucks teeth]
810
00:44:38,384 --> 00:44:40,261
I gotta start exercising.
811
00:44:40,345 --> 00:44:43,639
Man, did you see how fast
that thing took dirt out a hole?
812
00:44:43,723 --> 00:44:46,476
-I know.
-Like, whoosh.
813
00:44:46,559 --> 00:44:50,355
Man, I feel like an autoworker
in Detroit after the robots came.
814
00:44:50,438 --> 00:44:53,524
Like, "Oh, shit, I'm an autoworker
and now I'm out of a job"?
815
00:44:53,608 --> 00:44:54,900
Or like, "Yay!
The robots are here
816
00:44:54,984 --> 00:44:58,238
to do this shitty, horrible
autoworker work. Thank God"?
817
00:44:58,321 --> 00:44:59,739
[Black Cindy] Hmm...
818
00:45:01,824 --> 00:45:04,494
Uh, why is she running at me like that?
819
00:45:05,745 --> 00:45:07,580
[grunting]
820
00:45:09,206 --> 00:45:11,834
[blabbering] Ah!
What the fuck was that for?
821
00:45:12,668 --> 00:45:16,005
-That was dope.
-Did you get it? Let me see.
822
00:45:16,088 --> 00:45:17,715
Damn, she taste like strawberry.
823
00:45:17,798 --> 00:45:19,259
Okay. Yeah, come on.
824
00:45:19,342 --> 00:45:21,218
All right, the second one is a winner.
Don't you think?
825
00:45:21,302 --> 00:45:23,095
-Huh? What?
-[Judy] Look, what do you think?
826
00:45:23,178 --> 00:45:26,140
Interracial lesbian love
behind bars, okay.
827
00:45:26,223 --> 00:45:28,976
We're gonna hold out
for the big bucks, ladies, you know?
828
00:45:29,059 --> 00:45:31,061
Make the rags fight over it.
829
00:45:31,145 --> 00:45:32,647
All right, you did so good.
830
00:45:32,730 --> 00:45:35,316
My mamma gonna see me
kissing a white woman.
831
00:45:51,040 --> 00:45:53,376
What? I'm a mammal.
832
00:45:54,710 --> 00:45:57,588
[sighs] But maybe you're right,
I should shave this shit.
833
00:45:58,673 --> 00:46:00,591
It's like my hormones are out of whack.
834
00:46:00,675 --> 00:46:01,926
Where did you get that?
835
00:46:02,009 --> 00:46:03,218
Commissary.
836
00:46:03,303 --> 00:46:05,846
They haven't sold those since '92.
837
00:46:05,930 --> 00:46:07,473
Tell me where it came from.
838
00:46:07,557 --> 00:46:10,351
I got it in the salon.
On trade.
839
00:46:11,561 --> 00:46:14,229
I was not aware the salon
was back up and running.
840
00:46:14,314 --> 00:46:17,400
Oh, yeah.
Updos, downdos.
841
00:46:17,483 --> 00:46:18,984
[chuckles] We got any 'do you wanna do.
842
00:46:19,068 --> 00:46:20,653
[chuckles] I can see.
843
00:46:20,736 --> 00:46:23,280
Vidal Sassoon's got nothing on you.
844
00:46:24,365 --> 00:46:25,575
Business is business.
845
00:46:32,707 --> 00:46:34,875
Stop giving me the side-eye.
846
00:46:36,711 --> 00:46:38,713
I know how it got there.
847
00:47:12,455 --> 00:47:13,498
[sighs]
848
00:47:13,581 --> 00:47:16,876
Life is so tough
you can't make it into your own bunk?
849
00:47:16,959 --> 00:47:18,419
I don't feel good.
850
00:47:21,338 --> 00:47:24,759
[whispering] I heard that Alex told you
how our garden grows.
851
00:47:24,842 --> 00:47:27,887
If you say a word, I'll end you.
852
00:47:27,970 --> 00:47:31,015
I would... never.
853
00:47:31,098 --> 00:47:32,642
[sniffs]
854
00:47:32,725 --> 00:47:34,519
I just can't...
855
00:47:35,436 --> 00:47:37,187
I can't believe she did what she did.
856
00:47:37,271 --> 00:47:39,023
It needed to be done.
857
00:47:39,106 --> 00:47:41,442
She told me...
858
00:47:41,526 --> 00:47:43,277
and I didn't listen.
859
00:47:44,779 --> 00:47:46,113
She was all on her own.
860
00:47:46,196 --> 00:47:48,866
Maybe she was,
but now she's not.
861
00:47:48,949 --> 00:47:51,619
I've been helping her.
So has Frieda.
862
00:47:51,702 --> 00:47:54,664
She has friends.
Maybe not you, but other people.
863
00:47:54,747 --> 00:47:58,083
-I should have been there for her.
-You had other things on your mind.
864
00:47:58,167 --> 00:48:00,753
Being a panty kingpin took a lot of work.
865
00:48:00,836 --> 00:48:02,755
If I had known,
I would have done something.
866
00:48:02,838 --> 00:48:07,009
Honey... what she did
was morally defensible.
867
00:48:07,092 --> 00:48:09,845
I think, ultimately,
she will find comfort in that.
868
00:48:09,929 --> 00:48:11,764
It was kill or be killed.
869
00:48:12,723 --> 00:48:16,018
Maybe you should worry about the choices
you've made a little more.
870
00:48:16,101 --> 00:48:17,853
[crying] She's in pain.
871
00:48:17,937 --> 00:48:19,647
We are all in pain.
872
00:48:21,231 --> 00:48:22,900
I miss my mirror.
873
00:48:24,777 --> 00:48:26,278
And you hurt your arm.
874
00:48:26,361 --> 00:48:28,280
Hot plate accident?
875
00:48:28,363 --> 00:48:29,490
Another tattoo?
876
00:48:29,574 --> 00:48:31,992
Don't think I didn't hear
your tossing and turning all night.
877
00:48:32,076 --> 00:48:33,619
It's nothing.
878
00:48:34,829 --> 00:48:36,038
Show me.
879
00:48:38,123 --> 00:48:39,500
[crying]
880
00:48:51,804 --> 00:48:53,097
Who did that to you?
881
00:48:53,180 --> 00:48:56,433
[sighs] Doesn't matter.
It's done.
882
00:48:59,228 --> 00:49:03,816
Well, you can't go around
with that horror.
883
00:49:03,899 --> 00:49:06,360
[sobbing] I probably deserve it.
884
00:49:08,488 --> 00:49:10,197
We all need help.
885
00:49:14,201 --> 00:49:16,704
-[sobbing]
-[shushing]
886
00:49:20,541 --> 00:49:22,918
[man speaking indistinctly on PA]
887
00:49:29,717 --> 00:49:32,136
Hey. Hey, there!
888
00:49:32,219 --> 00:49:35,222
We gotta stop
running into each other like this.
889
00:49:35,305 --> 00:49:38,518
Yeah, or you could, uh,
just stop followin' me.
890
00:49:41,228 --> 00:49:44,273
That, uh, that whole Judas Priest thing,
that was a stupid joke.
891
00:49:44,982 --> 00:49:46,066
Oh.
892
00:49:46,150 --> 00:49:48,903
Truth be told, I'd probably
go back to when we first met.
893
00:49:49,737 --> 00:49:52,406
-Okay.
-I would have treated you like a person.
894
00:49:52,489 --> 00:49:56,076
Not like a duck.
Or... a thing.
895
00:49:58,996 --> 00:50:00,915
And I... I...
896
00:50:01,957 --> 00:50:03,208
[sighs]
897
00:50:03,292 --> 00:50:04,544
I would have liked our first time,
898
00:50:04,627 --> 00:50:08,130
if we had gotten there,
to have been... nice.
899
00:50:08,213 --> 00:50:11,175
And I would have wanted to see your face.
900
00:50:11,258 --> 00:50:14,804
And to have told you
what I told you about...
901
00:50:14,887 --> 00:50:17,765
uh, loving you, but softer.
902
00:50:17,848 --> 00:50:20,100
[Pennsatucky clears throat]
903
00:50:20,184 --> 00:50:22,562
I wish I hadn't been so mad.
904
00:50:24,980 --> 00:50:28,609
It wasn't fair what happened and...
905
00:50:29,694 --> 00:50:31,779
So yeah, that's probably
what I'd go back to.
906
00:50:31,862 --> 00:50:34,531
And I'm still trying
to figure out why it happened.
907
00:50:34,615 --> 00:50:36,033
Why...
908
00:50:37,159 --> 00:50:38,786
I did what I did.
909
00:50:46,001 --> 00:50:47,712
I'm sorry, Doggett.
910
00:50:55,135 --> 00:50:58,472
Thank you.
Thank you for saying that.
911
00:51:12,653 --> 00:51:15,615
The backhoe broke down
within the first ten minutes.
912
00:51:15,698 --> 00:51:18,450
Then it turned into a scene
out of Cool Hand Luke,
913
00:51:18,533 --> 00:51:21,578
with the inmates
digging trenches in the sun.
914
00:51:21,662 --> 00:51:23,330
Never seen that movie.
915
00:51:26,751 --> 00:51:28,002
I've let them all down.
916
00:51:30,755 --> 00:51:32,172
Well, you didn't let me down.
917
00:51:34,842 --> 00:51:37,052
-Not now.
-Why not?
918
00:51:38,888 --> 00:51:41,390
[sighs] Because I'm upset.
919
00:51:42,349 --> 00:51:43,684
Is that not obvious?
920
00:51:44,810 --> 00:51:46,145
You know, the school had no chance.
921
00:51:46,228 --> 00:51:48,480
Don't make me feel like
I'm some kind of dream killer.
922
00:51:53,152 --> 00:51:56,155
At least a new dorm
will help with overcrowding.
923
00:51:56,238 --> 00:51:57,948
Might help boost morale a little bit.
924
00:51:58,032 --> 00:52:00,284
Okay.
Good then.
925
00:52:01,201 --> 00:52:05,455
Morale... is... boosted.
926
00:52:05,539 --> 00:52:06,874
[chuckles]
927
00:52:08,458 --> 00:52:10,920
-Or not boosted?
-[knocking on door]
928
00:52:11,003 --> 00:52:12,421
-I'll get that.
-[sighs]
929
00:52:12,504 --> 00:52:14,965
Will you watch the sauce?
Keep stirring.
930
00:52:29,313 --> 00:52:31,190
-Who was it?
-Oh, it was no one.
931
00:52:31,273 --> 00:52:32,858
[doorbell rings]
932
00:52:34,318 --> 00:52:36,570
I'll get it.
I'll get it.
933
00:52:36,653 --> 00:52:38,447
[knocking continues]
934
00:52:42,576 --> 00:52:43,911
-Who the hell is that?
-It's no one.
935
00:52:43,994 --> 00:52:45,412
It's probably just a salesperson.
936
00:52:45,495 --> 00:52:47,414
[Crystal] I hear you, Mr. Caputo.
937
00:52:47,497 --> 00:52:50,710
And don't you even think about
turning that sprinkler back on me again.
938
00:52:51,836 --> 00:52:53,838
Again? How many times
has she been here?
939
00:52:53,921 --> 00:52:55,965
Shh! Keep it down.
940
00:52:57,591 --> 00:52:59,676
-[scoffs]
-Keep it down. Keep it down.
941
00:52:59,760 --> 00:53:03,597
[Crystal] I'm not going anywhere!
I know you're in there!
942
00:53:03,680 --> 00:53:05,640
-Who is that?
-It's Crystal Burset.
943
00:53:05,725 --> 00:53:07,727
Am I supposed to know who that is?
944
00:53:07,810 --> 00:53:10,020
She's married to Sophia Burset,
945
00:53:10,104 --> 00:53:13,107
the inmate you guys made me
put in a four-by-four box.
946
00:53:13,190 --> 00:53:17,652
The human being you won't allow me
to release from inhumane captivity.
947
00:53:17,737 --> 00:53:19,654
Why do you keep saying "you"?
948
00:53:19,739 --> 00:53:21,490
It's not me.
I'm Linda.
949
00:53:21,573 --> 00:53:23,826
I'm here to eat pasta and spend the night.
950
00:53:23,909 --> 00:53:26,871
Can you separate me
from the corporation we both work for?
951
00:53:26,954 --> 00:53:28,163
[sighs]
952
00:53:30,124 --> 00:53:31,583
You're right.
953
00:53:32,709 --> 00:53:35,295
You're right.
I'm sorry.
954
00:53:36,338 --> 00:53:39,341
It's been going on for too long,
and it's starting to get to me.
955
00:53:39,424 --> 00:53:42,136
Hey, hey, you're not MCC.
956
00:53:43,220 --> 00:53:44,596
[doorbell ringing]
957
00:53:44,679 --> 00:53:48,225
[Crystal] Hello?
I know you're in there, Mr. MCC.
958
00:53:48,308 --> 00:53:49,393
All right.
I'm calling the cops.
959
00:53:49,476 --> 00:53:51,228
-Don't do that.
-No, this is ridiculous.
960
00:53:51,311 --> 00:53:53,856
-She's harassing us.
-I will handle it.
961
00:53:53,939 --> 00:53:55,149
[scoffs]
962
00:53:58,235 --> 00:53:59,653
Crystal, it's late.
963
00:53:59,736 --> 00:54:04,658
MCC denied our request
under the Freedom of Information Act.
964
00:54:04,741 --> 00:54:06,076
I need to know what's going on.
965
00:54:06,160 --> 00:54:08,370
Pasta. And I made a salad.
966
00:54:08,453 --> 00:54:10,705
And we've been at work all day.
So, good night.
967
00:54:11,415 --> 00:54:12,875
Everything okay over there?
968
00:54:12,958 --> 00:54:15,585
-Who the hell is that?
-I have no idea.
969
00:54:15,669 --> 00:54:18,005
I told you I will handle this.
970
00:54:20,049 --> 00:54:22,467
Please. Go check on the sauce.
971
00:54:26,555 --> 00:54:27,639
[sighs]
972
00:54:28,765 --> 00:54:30,725
I need to know that she's okay.
973
00:54:31,811 --> 00:54:33,645
I mean, I don't even know if she's alive.
974
00:54:33,728 --> 00:54:37,274
MCC is hiding behind
its private corporate status
975
00:54:37,357 --> 00:54:39,526
and not complying with federal laws.
976
00:54:41,570 --> 00:54:44,614
Our lawsuit just goes on and on
and she's lost in there!
977
00:54:44,698 --> 00:54:47,659
I assure you she is alive and well.
978
00:54:47,742 --> 00:54:50,079
Well, I need proof.
979
00:54:50,162 --> 00:54:51,872
I need documentation.
980
00:54:51,956 --> 00:54:54,041
I need records.
I need a paper trail.
981
00:54:54,124 --> 00:54:56,001
I'm entitled to that.
982
00:54:56,085 --> 00:54:57,419
She's a federal prisoner.
983
00:54:57,502 --> 00:54:58,963
What the fuck?
984
00:54:59,046 --> 00:55:01,506
I got mugged once in Newark.
Don't worry, it's registered.
985
00:55:01,590 --> 00:55:02,674
-What the fuck?
-No.
986
00:55:02,757 --> 00:55:05,219
No, no, no guns.
Put the gun away.
987
00:55:05,302 --> 00:55:08,555
This is a registered gun and you are
trespassing on private property.
988
00:55:08,638 --> 00:55:12,017
You've been asked to leave
and I'm going to ask you one more time.
989
00:55:12,101 --> 00:55:14,436
Please leave.
Now.
990
00:55:14,519 --> 00:55:17,189
-Get back in your car, sir.
-Oh, Jesus.
991
00:55:17,272 --> 00:55:18,983
You've got a gun on my girlfriend.
992
00:55:19,066 --> 00:55:21,360
Well, if your girlfriend
joins you in your car,
993
00:55:21,443 --> 00:55:23,362
she'll be far away from the gun.
994
00:55:24,321 --> 00:55:25,322
Okay?
995
00:55:25,405 --> 00:55:28,825
[Caputo] Call the office next time.
We will talk on the phone.
996
00:55:29,910 --> 00:55:30,995
[door closes]
997
00:55:35,624 --> 00:55:36,876
[sighs]
998
00:55:39,128 --> 00:55:40,795
That was so hot.
999
00:55:46,343 --> 00:55:47,802
[both moaning]
1000
00:55:52,141 --> 00:55:53,767
[Piper sobbing]
1001
00:56:05,362 --> 00:56:07,948
Are we sure about this?
I mean, that's still really tender.
1002
00:56:08,032 --> 00:56:11,701
-[Piper sighs]
-We have to do it now or it won't match.
1003
00:56:13,203 --> 00:56:15,205
Yeah.
1004
00:56:15,289 --> 00:56:16,790
Let's do it.
1005
00:56:16,873 --> 00:56:18,000
Okay.
1006
00:56:19,001 --> 00:56:21,045
-Hold her tight.
-[whimpers]
1007
00:56:25,549 --> 00:56:27,051
[crying]
1008
00:56:30,930 --> 00:56:32,806
-[flesh burning]
-[screaming]
1009
00:56:37,269 --> 00:56:38,687
[sobbing]
1010
00:56:42,524 --> 00:56:44,609
I'm so sorry.
1011
00:56:48,197 --> 00:56:49,656
[wailing]
1012
00:56:51,200 --> 00:56:52,617
I know. I know.
1013
00:56:52,701 --> 00:56:55,245
I'm so sorry...
1014
00:56:55,329 --> 00:56:57,206
-[wailing]
-Oh.
1015
00:56:59,083 --> 00:57:02,627
When God gives you a swastika,
he opens a window.
1016
00:57:04,546 --> 00:57:06,048
[Piper continues sobbing]
1017
00:57:13,263 --> 00:57:14,723
And then you remember...
1018
00:57:15,765 --> 00:57:17,142
there is no God.
1019
00:57:18,227 --> 00:57:19,937
[soul music playing]