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<font color="#ff0080">subtitle Created by</font>  <font color="#ffff00"><b> JOYDEEP 0O7 </b></font> <font color="#ff0080">from Subscene.com</font>

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<i>MAN: Yo, not gonna lie.</i>

3
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<i>- This sound...</i>
<i>- </i> (COMPUTER CHIMES)

4
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<i>...gets me hard</i>
<i>as a fucking rock.</i>

5
00:02:13,566 --> 00:02:17,469
But I don't like to go too fast
<i>right off the bat.</i>

6
00:02:17,471 --> 00:02:22,641
I'd rather work my way into it,
<i>nice and easy.</i>

7
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<i>So I'll start off</i>
<i>with some stills.</i>

8
00:02:27,647 --> 00:02:30,782
Then, once I'm getting into it,

9
00:02:30,784 --> 00:02:32,784
<i>I start looking for a video.</i>

10
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<i>I never actually touch my cock</i>
<i>till I find the right clip.</i>

11
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<i>Then, once I do...</i>

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<i>...goodbye.</i>

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<i>For the next few minutes,</i>
<i>all the bullshit fades away,</i>

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and the only thing in the world
<i>is those tits...</i>

15
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<i>...that ass...</i>

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<i>...the blowjob, the cowboy,</i>

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<i>the doggy, the moneyshot,</i>
<i>and that's it.</i>

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<i>I don't gotta say anything,</i>

19
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<i>I don't gotta do anything.</i>

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<i>I just fucking lose myself.</i>

21
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<i>There's only a few things</i>
<i>I really care about in life.</i>

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<i>My body...</i>

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<i>...my pad...</i>

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<i>...my ride...</i>

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<i>...my family...</i>

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Amen.

27
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<i>...my church...</i>

28
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<i>- ...my boys...</i>
<i>- </i> (ALL YELLING)

29
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<i>...my girls...</i>

30
00:03:34,948 --> 00:03:38,417
(WOMEN MOANING)

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<i>...and my porn.</i>

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<i>I know that last one sounds
weird, but I'm just being honest.</i>

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Nothing else does it for me the
same way. Not even real pussy.

34
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<i>And, yo, I get plenty of that.</i>

35
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<i>Why you think my boys</i>
<i>call me The Don?</i>

36
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- Jonny-Boy!
- Don Jon, what's good, baby?

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- What up? I'm all right.
- You good?

38
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Jonny, look at me.
Everything good with you?

39
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- What's the matter with this guy?
- Come here, you animal!

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- Get the fuck off of me!
- Real talk, real talk. Purple.

41
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- That's not bad.
- It's better than "not bad."

42
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- You ain't see her turn around.
- You calling her a seven?

43
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- An eight. At least an eight.
- That is not an eight.

44
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She's cute in the face,
you can maybe call the face

45
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- an eight, tits are a four.
- Yeah, but the butt, man,

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it's exceptional. I'm telling
you. It changes everything.

47
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- Shit!
- What?

48
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- Sequins. Don't look. Don't look.
- What? Who is that?

49
00:04:22,463 --> 00:04:24,696
- You don't remember her?
- She's coming over here.

50
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'Cause you're staring
right at her.

51
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- (HIP-HOP PLAYS)
- WOMAN: Look who the fuck it is.

52
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- How you doing?
- Why didn't you call me back?

53
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Come on. You're a grown woman.

54
00:04:34,008 --> 00:04:36,375
Did you think
I was gonna call you back?

55
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You're pathetic, you know that?
Every week you got a new bitch.

56
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Then why'd you
come home with me?

57
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Fuck you!

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- Eight.
- No, that might be a nine.

59
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- You shitting me? That's a seven.
- You're out of your mind!

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I gave you the eight,
your record's intact. Chill out.

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You heard what she said?
Everyone knows about the streak.

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- You're sick. You know that?
- I don't know

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- what's wrong with me.
- Oh, my... damn!

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- What? What? Where?
- Red.

65
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- Holy shit! That's a dime.
- That is a dime.

66
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Nah, she's hot,
but it's not a dime.

67
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I don't even mess
with blondes like that,

68
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but that there is a dime!

69
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- Fuck yeah.
- I don't know, there might be

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- some lasagna up in there.
- I don't think so.

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Definitely not. She keep her
shit tight, you can tell.

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- No. I don't know.
- See, he likes that skinny shit.

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He likes that skinny, high-fashion,
looks-like-a-boy shit.

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- Fuck you!
- Admit it!

75
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He's kind of right,
man, you do.

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I don't like more
than a handful of titty.

77
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No, no, no, no, no. No. A nice handful, I
love it, but more than that, it's like no!

78
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Shit starts to remind me
of my mom or something.

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- Jesus Christ.
- Your mom do got some big-ass titties.

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- Don't talk about my mother.
- You brought up your mother.

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If you don't like that, there's
something wrong with you.

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I didn't say I didn't like it.
I said it's not a dime.

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- That's incorrect.
- She's taller than you anyway.

84
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- Fuck you, Jonny.
- I'm playing, come on.

85
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You gonna get that?

86
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WOMAN: Let me get a
vodka-cranberry.

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- Jonny!
- Sammy-boy, how you doing?

88
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- You good?
- Let me get a Grey Goose and soda.

89
00:06:05,965 --> 00:06:10,702
(HIP-HOP PLAYS)

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- What makes you think you could do that?
- Do what?

91
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- Get the fuck out of here.
- You wanna go somewhere?

92
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- Fuck you.
- You wanna fuck me?

93
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- Is that why you kissed me?
- I didn't kiss you.

94
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Yeah, you did.

95
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- Stop it, I mean it. Stop it.
- (LAUGHS)

96
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Come on. Let me buy you a drink.
It's early.

97
00:06:30,724 --> 00:06:33,792
- Where you going?
- I told you where I was going.

98
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Come on! Wait a minute!

99
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Shit!

100
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(HIP-HOP PLAYS)

101
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Yo. Headband.

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Nah, I don't know.

103
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(HIP-HOP PLAYS)

104
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(WOMAN MOANING)

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(COMPUTER CHIMES)

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<i>JON: See?</i>
<i>This is what I'm saying.</i>

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<i>Real pussy's all good.</i>
<i>But I'm sorry.</i>

108
00:07:44,665 --> 00:07:47,499
<i>It's not as good as porn.</i>

109
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<i>Tits?</i>

110
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<i>Great.</i>

111
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<i>Ass?</i>

112
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<i>Great.</i>

113
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<i>Blowjob?</i>

114
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<i>Sure, it's fucking fantastic</i>
<i>in person... if she'll do it.</i>

115
00:08:03,550 --> 00:08:06,585
<i>But in real life, if you wanna</i>
<i>get head, you gotta give head.</i>

116
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Lower. Not that low!

117
00:08:09,022 --> 00:08:12,824
<i>JON: I know, some guys love eating pussy,
but the thing about those guys is,</i>

118
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<i>they're fucking crazy.</i>
<i>Don't get me wrong,</i>

119
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<i>I like a good</i>
<i>pussy-eating clip.</i>

120
00:08:18,232 --> 00:08:22,534
<i>But, from down here, there's</i>
<i>nothing good about this.</i>

121
00:08:22,536 --> 00:08:23,835
(MOANING)

122
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<i>JON: And if she does finally</i>

123
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<i>decide to do you</i>
<i>the big favor...</i>

124
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<i>...she's in a fucking hurry.</i>

125
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<i>Now, when it comes</i>
<i>to the actual fucking...</i>

126
00:08:38,252 --> 00:08:41,686
<i>First of all, condoms are</i>
<i>terrible. They just are.</i>

127
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But you gotta wear one, 'cause,
<i>unlike porn,</i>

128
00:08:44,858 --> 00:08:47,025
<i>- real pussy can kill you.</i>
<i>- </i> (WOMAN MOANS)

129
00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:51,263
<i>Second of all, missionary</i>
<i>is the worst position</i>

130
00:08:51,265 --> 00:08:52,898
<i>in all of fucking.</i>

131
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<i>The tits lie flat,</i>
<i>you can't see her ass,</i>

132
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<i>you can't touch her ass,</i>
<i>'cause she's lying on her back.</i>

133
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<i>They won't let you do it from behind,
'cause they wanna look at you.</i>

134
00:09:03,277 --> 00:09:06,177
<i>And basically it's on me</i>
<i>to do all the work.</i>

135
00:09:06,179 --> 00:09:09,881
<i>Moneyshot? No. There is no</i>
<i>real-life moneyshot.</i>

136
00:09:09,883 --> 00:09:13,585
<i>Real girls won't do that shit. You just
gotta cum into the fucking condom.</i>

137
00:09:13,587 --> 00:09:18,723
(MOANING, PANTING)

138
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<i>JON: So, you tell me,</i>
<i>which looks better?</i>

139
00:09:23,730 --> 00:09:25,697
<i>This?</i>

140
00:09:27,934 --> 00:09:32,704
<i>- Or this?</i>
<i>- </i> (WOMAN MOANING)

141
00:10:06,839 --> 00:10:09,808
(ENGINE REVVING)

142
00:10:15,381 --> 00:10:19,284
Jesus! What are you fucking retarded?!
You're fucking retarded!

143
00:10:19,286 --> 00:10:24,356
You're a retarded person and
you're driving a fucking car!

144
00:10:24,358 --> 00:10:28,627
(CHURCH BELL CHIMING)

145
00:10:40,039 --> 00:10:42,941
(ORGAN PLAYS SOMBER MELODY)

146
00:10:46,345 --> 00:10:49,080
JON: In the name of the Father, <i>the
Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen.</i>

147
00:10:49,082 --> 00:10:50,782
<i>PRIEST: Amen.</i>
<i>Bless you, my son.</i>

148
00:10:50,784 --> 00:10:52,717
<i>Forgive me, Father, for</i>
<i>I have sinned.</i>

149
00:10:52,719 --> 00:10:54,152
<i>It has been one week</i>
<i>since my last confession.</i>

150
00:10:54,154 --> 00:10:55,754
PRIEST: Tell me your sins.

151
00:10:55,756 --> 00:10:57,389
Since last Sunday,
I had sexual relations

152
00:10:57,391 --> 00:10:59,791
out of wedlock two times.
I also watched

153
00:10:59,793 --> 00:11:02,394
pornographic videos
and masturbated 17 times.

154
00:11:02,396 --> 00:11:04,829
For these and all the sins
of my life, I am sorry.

155
00:11:04,831 --> 00:11:07,432
- Ten Lord's Prayers and ten Hail Marys.
- Thank you, Father.

156
00:11:07,434 --> 00:11:10,268
<i>PRIEST: Through the ministry of the Church,
may God give you pardon and peace,</i>

157
00:11:10,270 --> 00:11:13,805
and I absolve you from your sins in the name
of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.

158
00:11:13,807 --> 00:11:15,040
Amen.

159
00:11:15,042 --> 00:11:17,208
Bullshit! Bullshit!
Did you see that?

160
00:11:17,210 --> 00:11:18,943
That was fucking bullshit.
Bad call.

161
00:11:18,945 --> 00:11:21,813
- Jesus fucking Christ!
- Jon!

162
00:11:21,815 --> 00:11:25,316
- Fucking bullshit. Did you see that?
- I didn't see. What happened?

163
00:11:25,318 --> 00:11:27,285
They'll do a replay.
They better do a fucking replay.

164
00:11:27,287 --> 00:11:29,954
Unless they just don't want us to
see how bad that fucking call was.

165
00:11:29,956 --> 00:11:31,990
Why don't you get the thing
where you can pause...

166
00:11:31,992 --> 00:11:34,125
- Assholes, where's the replay?!
- Dad, there's a thing you can pause

167
00:11:34,127 --> 00:11:35,927
- and rewind.
- What are you talking about?

168
00:11:35,929 --> 00:11:37,862
It's digital.
You just rewind and watch it.

169
00:11:37,864 --> 00:11:40,398
- I'm not taping this.
- I know you're not taping it.

170
00:11:40,400 --> 00:11:42,267
Are you people serious,
no fucking replay?!

171
00:11:42,269 --> 00:11:44,903
- I'm not talking about a VCR.
- How do I know what the fuck

172
00:11:44,905 --> 00:11:47,005
- you're talking about?
- I don't know, I guess 'cause

173
00:11:47,007 --> 00:11:48,907
most American people
have heard of TiVo.

174
00:11:48,909 --> 00:11:51,276
Most people that pay attention
to the world around them!

175
00:11:51,278 --> 00:11:53,311
Here it is.
Shut up already, finally. Shit!

176
00:11:53,313 --> 00:11:55,914
- You seriously never heard of that?
- Yes!

177
00:11:55,916 --> 00:11:57,482
I've heard of it,
Jesus fucking...

178
00:11:57,484 --> 00:12:01,820
There! Look, his foot's on the
line! Look at that bullshit!

179
00:12:01,822 --> 00:12:04,089
- WOMAN: Jon! All right already!
- So if you've heard of it,

180
00:12:04,091 --> 00:12:05,757
- what is it?
- Did you see that?

181
00:12:05,759 --> 00:12:07,025
I'm asking you a question.

182
00:12:07,027 --> 00:12:08,226
It's a fucking thing...

183
00:12:08,228 --> 00:12:10,028
Wait a minute.
Did you see that?

184
00:12:10,030 --> 00:12:11,129
I'm asking you. Did you?

185
00:12:11,131 --> 00:12:13,231
Nah, I didn't see it.

186
00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:15,133
Why not?! What the fuck's
the matter with you?

187
00:12:15,135 --> 00:12:19,003
I said look at this play,
I said it right to you!

188
00:12:19,005 --> 00:12:21,873
I ask you to do the easiest fucking
thing, and you can't do it!

189
00:12:21,875 --> 00:12:24,909
- At least I know what a TiVo is.
- I know what a fucking TiVo is!

190
00:12:24,911 --> 00:12:26,478
You want a TiVo?
Is that what you're saying?

191
00:12:26,480 --> 00:12:28,813
- I would love a fucking TiVo.
- Who do you love?

192
00:12:28,815 --> 00:12:33,051
He loves TiVo. He sure as shit
don't love football. We know that.

193
00:12:35,454 --> 00:12:37,856
(SIGHS)

194
00:12:41,160 --> 00:12:45,396
One of these days, I'm gonna sit down here
and start eating, and you're gonna say,

195
00:12:45,398 --> 00:12:47,365
- "Mom, I found her."
- JON: Ma!

196
00:12:47,367 --> 00:12:48,933
MOTHER: One of these days.

197
00:12:48,935 --> 00:12:51,269
(TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING)

198
00:12:54,039 --> 00:12:59,177
(WHISPERING) Holy Mary...
Mother of God...

199
00:12:59,179 --> 00:13:01,412
...pray for us now...

200
00:13:01,414 --> 00:13:03,815
...and at the hour of death...

201
00:13:04,250 --> 00:13:06,217
Amen.

202
00:13:12,124 --> 00:13:14,392
Hail Mary... full of grace...

203
00:13:14,394 --> 00:13:18,096
- (COMPUTER CHIMES)
<i>- JON: All right, I'll admit, there are some down sides.</i>

204
00:13:18,098 --> 00:13:21,933
<i>Like there's the times you find
a great clip, with a hot chick.</i>

205
00:13:21,935 --> 00:13:26,337
<i>And right when you're starting</i>
<i>to cum, it shows the guy.</i>

206
00:13:26,339 --> 00:13:29,474
(GRUNTING)

207
00:13:29,476 --> 00:13:31,075
Fuck! Goddamn it!

208
00:13:31,077 --> 00:13:33,111
<i>JON: It's no one's</i>
<i>fault, really,</i>

209
00:13:33,113 --> 00:13:36,314
<i>but it still sucks. So...</i>

210
00:13:36,316 --> 00:13:38,483
<i>- </i> (COMPUTER CHIMES)
<i>- Also, nowadays you got so much</i>

211
00:13:38,485 --> 00:13:40,852
<i>to choose from,</i>
<i>finding just the right clip</i>

212
00:13:40,854 --> 00:13:43,121
<i>can take a lot of time.</i>

213
00:13:43,123 --> 00:13:44,989
<i>And my time is precious to me.</i>

214
00:13:44,991 --> 00:13:49,394
<i>Yeah, I got shit to do. So...</i>

215
00:13:49,396 --> 00:13:51,930
<i>- </i> (COMPUTER CHIMES)
<i>- And, every once in a while,</i>

216
00:13:51,932 --> 00:13:56,167
you find a clip that's so good,
<i>it's fucking depressing.</i>

217
00:13:56,169 --> 00:13:59,170
<i>And you're thinking to yourself,
why can't real pussy be like this?</i>

218
00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:02,407
<i>You know, I smash new girls</i>
<i>all the fucking time,</i>

219
00:14:02,409 --> 00:14:06,211
<i>always an eight or better, and it's still
never this good. What am I doing wrong?</i>

220
00:14:06,213 --> 00:14:08,246
(SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE)

221
00:14:08,248 --> 00:14:13,184
<i>JON: Maybe it's time to try</i>
<i>something new. So...</i>

222
00:14:15,287 --> 00:14:19,424
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

223
00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:24,329
- Yo, you remember that dime from last week?
- Oh, shit.

224
00:14:24,331 --> 00:14:27,098
The blonde in the dress? She
was insane, bro. You hit that?

225
00:14:27,100 --> 00:14:29,868
No, I didn't, you fucking alcoholic,
I saw you after she left.

226
00:14:29,870 --> 00:14:32,170
- Fuck you, Jonny!
- I thought you made that happen.

227
00:14:32,172 --> 00:14:34,339
- I threw it to this other random.
- Typical.

228
00:14:34,341 --> 00:14:36,207
- Probably an eight or nine.
- Six or seven.

229
00:14:36,209 --> 00:14:38,443
Shut the fuck up!
Who'd you take home, huh?

230
00:14:38,445 --> 00:14:41,179
Twos and threes, baby. I'm
telling you, twos and threes

231
00:14:41,181 --> 00:14:42,914
are some open-minded ladies.

232
00:14:42,916 --> 00:14:45,617
- I wanna find that girl.
- You get her name?

233
00:14:45,619 --> 00:14:48,553
- Her name?
- First and last name.

234
00:14:48,555 --> 00:14:51,289
I'm looking for her name,
first and last name.

235
00:14:51,291 --> 00:14:53,851
Shit, I don't know.
You know who would?

236
00:14:55,628 --> 00:14:59,130
- Barbara Sugarman.
- Sugarman?

237
00:14:59,132 --> 00:15:00,565
Thanks, bro.

238
00:15:00,567 --> 00:15:03,401
- OK, what was it again?
- Barbara Sugarman.

239
00:15:05,471 --> 00:15:08,306
- You see her anywhere?
- No.

240
00:15:09,608 --> 00:15:11,542
- Oh, shit!
- That's her?

241
00:15:11,544 --> 00:15:14,479
- That's definitely her.
- Oh! Got you, bitch!

242
00:15:14,481 --> 00:15:16,481
What you wanna say?
You gotta say something.

243
00:15:16,483 --> 00:15:19,284
- Really?
- A girl that bad gets mad friend requests.

244
00:15:19,286 --> 00:15:23,388
- Fuck!
- I think it's dinner. Maybe even lunch.

245
00:15:23,390 --> 00:15:25,657
Might have to take this girl
out for coffee.

246
00:15:25,659 --> 00:15:27,659
- Christ!
- Yeah, this is the long game.

247
00:15:27,661 --> 00:15:29,427
You're not getting that butt
from Barbara Sugarman

248
00:15:29,429 --> 00:15:31,396
anytime in
the immediate future.

249
00:15:31,398 --> 00:15:33,031
If you had it like that,
it would have went down.

250
00:15:33,033 --> 00:15:35,600
You're right.
You're totally right. Shit!

251
00:15:35,602 --> 00:15:39,137
I know, I was about to say, the mighty
Don bringing out the long game?

252
00:15:39,139 --> 00:15:41,406
- She's a dime, but...
- This girl's more than a dime.

253
00:15:41,408 --> 00:15:44,976
Come on, son. There's no such thing, that's
the point, it's a scale from one to ten.

254
00:15:44,978 --> 00:15:47,111
- I'm saying, this girl...
- Oh, my God!

255
00:15:47,113 --> 00:15:51,549
- You in love with this girl already?
- Go fuck yourself.

256
00:15:56,488 --> 00:15:58,489
- Hi.
- Can I help you?

257
00:15:58,491 --> 00:16:02,293
- Yeah, two for lunch.
- Sure. Right this way.

258
00:16:09,668 --> 00:16:14,205
(ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYS)

259
00:16:40,032 --> 00:16:41,232
Hey.

260
00:16:42,468 --> 00:16:44,736
- How are you?
- Good. Good. How you been?

261
00:16:44,738 --> 00:16:48,272
- How did you get my Facebook?
- Oh. Getting right to it.

262
00:16:48,274 --> 00:16:50,174
- Yeah.
- I just looked up your name.

263
00:16:50,176 --> 00:16:52,176
- I didn't tell you my name.
- Obviously you did,

264
00:16:52,178 --> 00:16:54,312
- 'cause I looked it up.
- No, I definitely did not

265
00:16:54,314 --> 00:16:56,080
- tell you my name.
- Yeah, you did.

266
00:16:56,082 --> 00:16:57,782
- I think I would remember.
- No offense,

267
00:16:57,784 --> 00:16:59,450
but you were pretty wasted
the other night.

268
00:16:59,452 --> 00:17:01,219
- So was I.
- Can I get you some drinks?

269
00:17:01,221 --> 00:17:02,720
- Diet Coke, please.
- A Coke.

270
00:17:02,722 --> 00:17:04,188
Coke and a Diet Coke.

271
00:17:04,190 --> 00:17:07,225
I'll be right
back to take your order.

272
00:17:07,227 --> 00:17:09,060
I had a few drinks
the other night,

273
00:17:09,062 --> 00:17:11,562
so I may not have remembered
telling you my first name,

274
00:17:11,564 --> 00:17:13,598
but I definitely did not
tell you my last name.

275
00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:15,800
- I'm telling you... Hey!
- Don't lie to me.

276
00:17:15,802 --> 00:17:18,569
Look, you don't know me, so I'm gonna
let you off the hook this time.

277
00:17:18,571 --> 00:17:22,573
But trust me, in the future you'll be much
happier if you always tell me the truth.

278
00:17:22,575 --> 00:17:24,509
Wait, wait, wait,
I'll be happier?

279
00:17:24,511 --> 00:17:27,812
You don't think I could
make you happy if I wanted to?

280
00:17:27,814 --> 00:17:31,182
So how did you
find out my name?

281
00:17:31,184 --> 00:17:33,351
- I asked around.
- You asked around about me?

282
00:17:33,353 --> 00:17:36,287
- Yeah.
- That's interesting.

283
00:17:36,289 --> 00:17:38,256
- Why?
- Why? What do you mean why?

284
00:17:38,258 --> 00:17:40,425
- Why did you ask around about me?
- 'Cause I wanted to.

285
00:17:40,427 --> 00:17:42,460
- You wanted to take me to lunch?
- Yeah.

286
00:17:42,462 --> 00:17:45,229
- Don't lie.
- OK, I asked around about you

287
00:17:45,231 --> 00:17:47,432
'cause I wanna fuck your brains out.
Is that what you want me to say?

288
00:17:47,434 --> 00:17:51,269
(CHUCKLES) Well, at least
you're being honest now.

289
00:17:51,271 --> 00:17:52,770
Let me ask you a question.

290
00:17:52,772 --> 00:17:56,207
Why did you come here, huh?
Why did you say yes to me?

291
00:17:56,209 --> 00:17:58,242
- That's a very good question.
- Yeah, so?

292
00:17:58,244 --> 00:17:59,844
You're gonna have
to wait to find out.

293
00:17:59,846 --> 00:18:02,480
- All right. I got time.
- Really? You got time?

294
00:18:02,482 --> 00:18:04,715
It seemed like you were
in a big hurry the other day.

295
00:18:04,717 --> 00:18:06,551
I can be that way
when I'm shit-faced.

296
00:18:09,354 --> 00:18:10,588
You're cute, I like you.

297
00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:13,825
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.

298
00:18:13,827 --> 00:18:16,427
Listen, you wanna
know the truth?

299
00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:19,363
This is the truth.

300
00:18:19,365 --> 00:18:22,533
You're the most beautiful thing
I've ever seen in my life.

301
00:18:27,506 --> 00:18:29,674
You like movies?

302
00:18:31,677 --> 00:18:35,480
<i>JON: I don't watch</i>
<i>too many movies.</i>

303
00:18:35,482 --> 00:18:40,551
I used to watch 'em a lot when <i>I was a little
kid, before I could get my hands on any porn.</i>

304
00:18:40,553 --> 00:18:44,622
Back then, if I wanted to see a <i>really hot
girl, my best bet was to watch a movie.</i>

305
00:18:44,624 --> 00:18:46,791
- That's the one you like?
- Oh, it's so great.

306
00:18:46,793 --> 00:18:48,954
- I love these two. And you?
- Yeah. They're great.

307
00:18:53,765 --> 00:18:57,802
<i>JON: But now, I don't</i>
<i>really see the point.</i>

308
00:19:01,673 --> 00:19:04,575
<i>I don't know, I guess</i>
<i>I'm missing something.</i>

309
00:19:04,577 --> 00:19:08,713
<i>Because most people</i>
<i>eat that shit up.</i>

310
00:19:10,282 --> 00:19:12,216
(ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING)

311
00:19:12,218 --> 00:19:14,185
<i>The pretty woman.</i>

312
00:19:14,653 --> 00:19:16,554
<i>The pretty man.</i>

313
00:19:16,556 --> 00:19:18,389
<i>Love at first sight.</i>

314
00:19:19,391 --> 00:19:21,425
<i>The first kiss.</i>

315
00:19:21,427 --> 00:19:23,261
<i>- The breakup.</i>
<i>- WOMAN ONSCREEN: I felt that!</i>

316
00:19:23,263 --> 00:19:25,496
<i>- JON: The makeup.</i>
<i>- MAN ONSCREEN: I'm scared.</i>

317
00:19:25,498 --> 00:19:26,931
<i>JON: The expensive wedding,</i>

318
00:19:26,933 --> 00:19:28,933
<i>and they drive off</i>
<i>into the sunset.</i>

319
00:19:28,935 --> 00:19:30,902
<i>Everyone knows it's fake,</i>
<i>but they watch it</i>

320
00:19:30,904 --> 00:19:33,538
<i>like it's real fucking life.</i>

321
00:19:33,540 --> 00:19:37,575
(MUSIC SWELLS)

322
00:19:37,577 --> 00:19:41,379
She was the most important thing to him.
He gave up everything for her.

323
00:19:41,381 --> 00:19:43,648
It was just meant to be.

324
00:19:43,650 --> 00:19:46,784
- I love movies like that.
- Yeah, it was great.

325
00:19:46,786 --> 00:19:51,455
He's just such a real man. And
she's so beautiful too, always.

326
00:19:51,457 --> 00:19:54,292
- Her? No, she's too skinny.
- Yeah.

327
00:19:54,294 --> 00:19:57,295
- What?
- You wanna know who's beautiful?

328
00:19:57,297 --> 00:20:00,665
(ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYS)

329
00:20:02,734 --> 00:20:06,537
(FIREWORKS WHISTLING,
POPPING IN DISTANCE)

330
00:20:15,380 --> 00:20:19,684
- What makes you think you could do that?
- Do what?

331
00:20:26,858 --> 00:20:29,293
(MUSIC SWELLS)

332
00:20:43,709 --> 00:20:47,311
(CHURCH BELLS CHIMING)

333
00:20:52,718 --> 00:20:55,686
- (ORGAN PLAYS SOMBER MELODY)
- <i>JON: In the name of the Father, the Son</i>

334
00:20:55,688 --> 00:20:57,688
<i>- and the Holy Spirit, Amen.</i>
<i>- PRIEST: Amen. Bless you.</i>

335
00:20:57,690 --> 00:21:00,491
<i>JON: Forgive me, Father,</i>
<i>for I have sinned.</i>

336
00:21:00,493 --> 00:21:02,860
<i>- It has been one week since my last confession.
- PRIEST: Tell me your sins.</i>

337
00:21:02,862 --> 00:21:07,565
Since last Sunday I did not have
sexual relations out of wedlock.

338
00:21:07,567 --> 00:21:12,370
I did kiss a girl, this one girl,
out of wedlock, several times,

339
00:21:12,372 --> 00:21:17,775
but it's just kissing. I don't know,
I forget if that counts, so...

340
00:21:17,777 --> 00:21:20,811
Also, I watched pornographic
videos and masturbated 22 times.

341
00:21:20,813 --> 00:21:23,347
For these and all the sins
of my life, I am sorry.

342
00:21:23,349 --> 00:21:25,950
- Ten Lord's Prayers and ten Hail Marys.
- Thank you, Father.

343
00:21:25,952 --> 00:21:28,819
PRIEST: Through the ministry of <i>the Church,
may God give you pardon and peace,</i>

344
00:21:28,821 --> 00:21:31,622
and I absolve you from your sins in
the name of the Father, of the Son

345
00:21:31,624 --> 00:21:33,691
- and the Holy Spirit.
- Amen.

346
00:21:33,693 --> 00:21:34,759
(JAZZY, SULTRY SONG PLAYING)

347
00:21:34,761 --> 00:21:36,460
<i>♪ I got a fever</i>

348
00:21:36,462 --> 00:21:37,995
<i>♪ An inflammation</i>

349
00:21:37,997 --> 00:21:40,931
<i>♪ That's what I got</i>

350
00:21:40,933 --> 00:21:43,834
<i>♪ You turn the heat on me</i>

351
00:21:43,836 --> 00:21:47,371
<i>♪ Some like it hot</i>

352
00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:50,675
<i>♪ Call out the engine</i>

353
00:21:50,677 --> 00:21:52,877
<i>♪ Ring up the station</i>

354
00:21:52,879 --> 00:21:56,314
<i>♪ I am on the spot...</i>

355
00:21:56,316 --> 00:22:01,319
<i>NARRATOR ON TV: Introducing the
charbroiled, not fried, codfish sandwich,</i>

356
00:22:01,321 --> 00:22:03,954
<i>only at Carl's Jr.</i>
<i>And Hardee's.</i>

357
00:22:05,390 --> 00:22:08,726
<i>♪ Love burns you up the most ♪</i>

358
00:22:08,728 --> 00:22:12,730
<i>- ♪ Like it or not
- NARRATOR: More than just a piece of meat.</i>

359
00:22:12,732 --> 00:22:13,232
<i>♪ Baby</i>

360
00:22:16,969 --> 00:22:19,603
<i>♪ I like it hot</i>

361
00:22:21,673 --> 00:22:24,909
(ENGINE REVVING)

362
00:22:24,911 --> 00:22:29,380
Oh, go! Jesus.
It's a yellow light! Fuck you!

363
00:22:29,382 --> 00:22:31,449
(CAR RADIO PLAYING INDISTINCTLY)

364
00:22:31,451 --> 00:22:34,051
(TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING)

365
00:22:37,622 --> 00:22:40,891
(WHISPERING) Our Father...
Who art in heaven...

366
00:22:40,893 --> 00:22:43,994
...hallowed be Thy name...
Thy Kingdom come...

367
00:22:43,996 --> 00:22:45,730
...Thy will be done...

368
00:22:45,732 --> 00:22:48,766
...on earth...
as it is in heaven...

369
00:22:48,768 --> 00:22:51,769
(MOANING)

370
00:22:53,038 --> 00:22:55,005
- No.
- No... What?

371
00:22:55,007 --> 00:22:57,441
- Not out here.
- So let's go inside.

372
00:22:57,443 --> 00:22:58,776
Mm-mm.

373
00:22:58,778 --> 00:23:00,678
- Why not?
- It's not time for that yet.

374
00:23:00,680 --> 00:23:03,581
- You sure?
- Yeah. We barely know each other.

375
00:23:03,583 --> 00:23:08,686
- Yeah, we do, pretty much.
- (BOTH MOANING)

376
00:23:08,688 --> 00:23:11,956
- I don't know your friends.
- My friends?

377
00:23:11,958 --> 00:23:13,758
Mmm...

378
00:23:13,760 --> 00:23:16,961
- I wanna meet your friends.
- Those guys are assholes.

379
00:23:16,963 --> 00:23:18,696
- Yeah?
- Yeah.

380
00:23:18,698 --> 00:23:22,032
And you don't know my friends.

381
00:23:22,034 --> 00:23:25,069
- Or our families.
- Wait, our families?

382
00:23:25,071 --> 00:23:28,739
Yeah. I wanna meet
your parents and your sister.

383
00:23:28,741 --> 00:23:31,509
- Oh, Jesus!
- What? You don't wanna meet my brothers

384
00:23:31,511 --> 00:23:35,646
- and my sister?
- Uh...

385
00:23:35,648 --> 00:23:40,751
- 'Cause I know they wanna meet you.
- Yeah... I bet they do.

386
00:23:40,753 --> 00:23:42,920
BARBARA: Mmm... (CHUCKLES)

387
00:23:45,757 --> 00:23:50,127
- (JON MOANS)
- Mm-hm.

388
00:23:50,129 --> 00:23:51,495
- Jon.
- Yeah?

389
00:23:51,497 --> 00:23:52,897
I can't let you

390
00:23:52,899 --> 00:23:55,199
- come inside just yet.
- No?

391
00:23:55,201 --> 00:23:58,869
No, 'cause I don't know what
that would mean. You know?

392
00:23:58,871 --> 00:24:01,939
I don't want to do anything
unless it means something.

393
00:24:01,941 --> 00:24:04,675
- Uh-huh...
- Mm...

394
00:24:04,677 --> 00:24:07,178
Don't you think it's always
better when it means something?

395
00:24:07,180 --> 00:24:09,079
- Yeah.
- Mm...

396
00:24:09,081 --> 00:24:12,783
- I think you should go back to school, baby.
- What?

397
00:24:12,785 --> 00:24:17,688
- Yeah, come on. Just a night class.
- Oh, my God!

398
00:24:17,690 --> 00:24:19,790
- Just get your degree.
- Oh!

399
00:24:19,792 --> 00:24:23,060
- You would be so sexy with a real job.
- Mm!

400
00:24:23,062 --> 00:24:26,096
- Mm-hm! Yeah...
- (GRUNTS)

401
00:24:26,098 --> 00:24:29,767
So, what do you say? You, me and
our friends, we go out sometime?

402
00:24:29,769 --> 00:24:33,604
- Oh, yeah. Yeah.
- Yeah? And our families meet, huh?

403
00:24:33,606 --> 00:24:34,538
- Oh!
- Yeah?

404
00:24:34,540 --> 00:24:36,173
- Yeah.
- Mm...

405
00:24:36,175 --> 00:24:39,176
And you take one night class for me, baby?
One little class?

406
00:24:39,178 --> 00:24:41,679
- Oh! Oh!
- Huh? Yeah? Yeah?

407
00:24:41,681 --> 00:24:45,216
- Yeah! Oh!
- Come on, baby, cum... cum...

408
00:24:45,218 --> 00:24:49,653
- (GRUNTING)
- Mm-hm! Uh-huh.

409
00:24:49,655 --> 00:24:53,123
(PANTING, GRUNTING)

410
00:24:53,125 --> 00:24:55,926
- Nice.
- Oh, Jesus...

411
00:24:55,928 --> 00:24:57,862
Yeah.

412
00:25:05,103 --> 00:25:07,705
You're so cute.

413
00:25:13,845 --> 00:25:15,813
Call me.

414
00:25:30,262 --> 00:25:32,663
(COMPUTER CHIMES)

415
00:25:50,215 --> 00:25:52,650
- Baby!
- Baby, what?

416
00:25:52,652 --> 00:25:54,218
- Baby.
- Baby...

417
00:25:54,220 --> 00:25:56,120
- You guys having a good time?
- You bitch,

418
00:25:56,122 --> 00:25:57,254
- I don't wanna hear it.
- Jesus Christ.

419
00:25:57,256 --> 00:25:58,822
A toast. Let's make a toast.

420
00:25:58,824 --> 00:26:00,224
Everyone listen up.
You get up too.

421
00:26:00,226 --> 00:26:01,859
This is for you.
Come on. Get up.

422
00:26:01,861 --> 00:26:03,594
- Oh, God.
- All right.

423
00:26:03,596 --> 00:26:05,963
You guys know tonight
is me and this girl's

424
00:26:05,965 --> 00:26:09,266
one-month anniversary. I'm
counting that from the first time

425
00:26:09,268 --> 00:26:12,136
I ever saw her, 'cause ever since
then, I've felt the same way.

426
00:26:12,138 --> 00:26:15,072
She's the most beautiful thing
I've ever seen in my life.

427
00:26:15,074 --> 00:26:16,941
- To you, baby.
- No, to us.

428
00:26:16,943 --> 00:26:18,809
- To us.
- (GLASSES CLINK)

429
00:26:18,811 --> 00:26:21,278
- Mwah. Cheers.
- ALL: Cheers!

430
00:26:21,280 --> 00:26:24,081
God bless.

431
00:26:24,083 --> 00:26:26,750
- So, what's he do?
- He's in school.

432
00:26:26,752 --> 00:26:28,919
- Oh, the family's got money?
- No, he's got a job.

433
00:26:28,921 --> 00:26:30,254
- Retail?
- No.

434
00:26:30,256 --> 00:26:31,622
- Service?
- Yeah.

435
00:26:31,624 --> 00:26:33,123
He's definitely been

436
00:26:33,125 --> 00:26:35,025
- spending time at the gym.
- Right? I know.

437
00:26:35,027 --> 00:26:36,994
- He is so disciplined.
- You guys work out together?

438
00:26:36,996 --> 00:26:40,297
- Mm-mm. No.
- Does he do that muscle guy thing

439
00:26:40,299 --> 00:26:43,300
where he's, like, looking at
himself while you're doing it?

440
00:26:43,302 --> 00:26:46,904
- Oh. We haven't done it yet.
- Shit, really?

441
00:26:46,906 --> 00:26:51,041
- Oh, my God. That's so amazing!
- All right. I like him.

442
00:26:51,043 --> 00:26:53,377
Goddamn! White shorts.

443
00:26:53,379 --> 00:26:57,247
(HIP-HOP PLAYS)

444
00:26:57,249 --> 00:26:59,683
- JON: Nah.
- What? Come on, that's a dime!

445
00:26:59,685 --> 00:27:02,152
- That's not a dime.
- I'm sorry, but I'd rather do that

446
00:27:02,154 --> 00:27:04,955
- than do yours.
- You faggot motherfucker!

447
00:27:04,957 --> 00:27:08,092
- I can like any girl I wanna.
- But she's not hotter than my girl.

448
00:27:08,094 --> 00:27:11,128
- To you, maybe not, but to me...
- Look at that. Sorry, buddy.

449
00:27:11,130 --> 00:27:14,765
- Fuck you, Jonny!
- That's the way...

450
00:27:14,767 --> 00:27:16,634
Hi.

451
00:27:30,849 --> 00:27:33,117
Shit!

452
00:27:33,119 --> 00:27:35,219
So, uh...

453
00:27:37,856 --> 00:27:40,157
- I'm sort of seeing this girl.
- (COUGHS)

454
00:27:40,159 --> 00:27:42,359
- MOTHER: What did you say?
- What do you mean, what did I say?

455
00:27:42,361 --> 00:27:44,695
- Did you say...?
- JON SR.: She asked you what you said.

456
00:27:44,697 --> 00:27:46,797
What's the matter with that? I
couldn't understand you, either.

457
00:27:46,799 --> 00:27:48,399
Speak up and talk
like a human being.

458
00:27:48,401 --> 00:27:50,167
- Shush.
- What's your problem?

459
00:27:50,169 --> 00:27:51,268
- Jon.
- What?

460
00:27:51,270 --> 00:27:52,736
Did you say you found her?

461
00:27:52,738 --> 00:27:54,972
Well, I said I'm sort of...

462
00:27:54,974 --> 00:27:56,306
Oh, my God! What's her name?

463
00:27:56,308 --> 00:27:59,410
- Barbara.
- Barbara! Barbara what?

464
00:27:59,412 --> 00:28:01,745
- JON SR.: Here we go...
- Shh! Barbara what?

465
00:28:01,747 --> 00:28:04,882
- Barbara Sugarman.
- Sugarman?

466
00:28:04,884 --> 00:28:07,151
- She a Jew?
- I don't think so.

467
00:28:07,153 --> 00:28:09,687
- You don't know?
- We haven't really talked...

468
00:28:09,689 --> 00:28:11,355
She's not Italian, we know that.

469
00:28:11,357 --> 00:28:13,724
- Sugarman. She black?
- No.

470
00:28:13,726 --> 00:28:15,225
What does she look like?

471
00:28:15,227 --> 00:28:17,394
She's the most beautiful thing
I've seen in my life.

472
00:28:17,396 --> 00:28:20,330
- Oh, boy.
- Baby! Oh! (LAUGHS)

473
00:28:20,332 --> 00:28:23,000
That's the sweetest thing
I ever heard anybody say.

474
00:28:23,002 --> 00:28:25,969
- And does she love you?
- Wait a minute. Love him? You kidding?

475
00:28:25,971 --> 00:28:28,338
- Jon, shush!
- They're kids, for Christ's sake!

476
00:28:28,340 --> 00:28:31,175
- So what?
- You know what? Don't call me a kid.

477
00:28:31,177 --> 00:28:32,910
We talked about this,
I don't appreciate it.

478
00:28:32,912 --> 00:28:35,345
- Excuse me.
- Dad, I'm asking you nicely.

479
00:28:35,347 --> 00:28:37,281
To not call you a kid?
You're a fucking kid.

480
00:28:37,283 --> 00:28:39,049
- Jon!
- Fuck you!

481
00:28:39,051 --> 00:28:42,853
- Fuck me? Did you just say fuck me to me?
- Jon!

482
00:28:42,855 --> 00:28:46,223
He said they're in love, they're in love.
It doesn't matter how old they are.

483
00:28:46,225 --> 00:28:52,362
He's older than you were when we got married. You know that?
For God's sake, he's your son!

484
00:28:54,165 --> 00:28:55,833
You love this girl?

485
00:28:57,769 --> 00:29:00,337
Yes, I do.

486
00:29:00,339 --> 00:29:03,073
Then when do we
get to meet her?

487
00:29:03,075 --> 00:29:06,009
(GASPS) Oh!

488
00:29:06,011 --> 00:29:07,478
All right, Mom, OK.

489
00:29:07,480 --> 00:29:12,015
(LAUGHS) Oh!

490
00:29:12,017 --> 00:29:15,486
WOMAN: Bella?
Sweetheart, come over here.

491
00:29:18,123 --> 00:29:23,060
Come on, let me fix your
lipstick. Here we go.

492
00:29:23,062 --> 00:29:24,895
- You look so beautiful.
- Thank you.

493
00:29:24,897 --> 00:29:27,931
- Can I get you a refill?
- You don't have to do that.

494
00:29:27,933 --> 00:29:29,500
- No, it's my pleasure.
- Jon.

495
00:29:29,502 --> 00:29:31,869
- Thank you.
- Jon, you meet Daryl?

496
00:29:31,871 --> 00:29:33,904
- Oh, wow.
- You wanna hold him?

497
00:29:33,906 --> 00:29:37,141
- I don't know...
- Come here.

498
00:29:37,143 --> 00:29:39,476
- Here you go, babe.
- OK.

499
00:29:39,478 --> 00:29:44,214
- All right. Is that good? Is that right?
- Yeah. (LAUGHS)

500
00:29:44,216 --> 00:29:46,250
You look so cute,
the two of you.

501
00:29:46,252 --> 00:29:49,887
(PANTING, MOANING)

502
00:29:55,360 --> 00:29:56,994
MAN: Barbara!

503
00:29:56,996 --> 00:29:58,495
How long have
we been up here for?

504
00:29:58,497 --> 00:30:01,532
- Not long.
- Well, I gotta go, we gotta go.

505
00:30:01,534 --> 00:30:04,968
Come on, let's go.
Come on. Come on.

506
00:30:05,570 --> 00:30:07,905
Close the door.

507
00:30:07,907 --> 00:30:13,143
OK. Let's take a break and when we get
back we'll go over the course syllabus.

508
00:30:27,225 --> 00:30:29,126
(PHONE VIBRATING)

509
00:30:29,128 --> 00:30:31,929
- Hey.
- <i>BARBARA: Baby! How is it?</i>

510
00:30:31,931 --> 00:30:33,897
- It's great.
- <i>Yeah? You're on break?</i>

511
00:30:33,899 --> 00:30:37,034
- Yeah. How did you know?
- <i>Your schedule's online.</i>

512
00:30:37,036 --> 00:30:40,504
- <i>Baby, I'm just so proud of you.
- Thanks.</i>

513
00:30:40,506 --> 00:30:42,172
- <i>Baby?</i>
<i>- Yeah?</i>

514
00:30:42,174 --> 00:30:44,541
<i>Can I come over</i>
<i>when you're done?</i>

515
00:30:44,543 --> 00:30:46,944
- You wanna come to my place?
- <i>Mm-hm.</i>

516
00:30:46,946 --> 00:30:49,012
- What, tonight?
- <i>Yeah.</i>

517
00:30:49,014 --> 00:30:50,581
OK, great.

518
00:30:50,583 --> 00:30:54,151
- <i>You get back to class, sexy man.
- All right.</i>

519
00:30:54,153 --> 00:30:57,187
- <i>Bye, baby.</i>
<i>- OK, bye.</i>

520
00:31:05,496 --> 00:31:08,532
(WOMAN SOBBING)

521
00:31:10,034 --> 00:31:13,070
Jesus fucking Christ!

522
00:31:18,576 --> 00:31:21,511
- Excuse me. Sorry.
- Oh, fuck, I'm sorry.

523
00:31:21,513 --> 00:31:23,480
It's fine. It's fine.

524
00:31:31,890 --> 00:31:34,324
- Hi, baby.
- Hey.

525
00:31:34,326 --> 00:31:38,328
(ROMANTIC MUSIC SWELLS)

526
00:32:04,422 --> 00:32:07,658
- It's OK. I'll be right back.
- Baby...

527
00:32:18,970 --> 00:32:20,304
(COMPUTER CHIMES)

528
00:32:20,306 --> 00:32:23,607
<i>JON: I'm in love with Barbara.</i>
<i>I am.</i>

529
00:32:23,609 --> 00:32:26,376
<i>And tonight,</i>
<i>I finally got to fuck her.</i>

530
00:32:26,378 --> 00:32:31,048
<i>But I'm sorry to say,</i>
<i>it's still not as good as porn.</i>

531
00:32:31,050 --> 00:32:32,516
<i>Tits?</i>

532
00:32:34,319 --> 00:32:36,586
<i>Best ever.</i>

533
00:32:36,588 --> 00:32:38,322
<i>Ass?</i>

534
00:32:40,024 --> 00:32:42,192
<i>Best ever.</i>

535
00:32:42,194 --> 00:32:44,027
<i>- Blowjob?</i>
<i>- </i> (WOMAN MOANS)

536
00:32:50,735 --> 00:32:56,206
<i>Shit. Good luck. A girl that hot?
She doesn't have to give head.</i>

537
00:32:56,208 --> 00:33:00,344
(MAN, WOMAN MOANING)

538
00:33:00,346 --> 00:33:04,681
<i>For her, she just wants to go from
kissing, to naked kissing, to fucking.</i>

539
00:33:04,683 --> 00:33:08,418
<i>- </i> (MOANING)
<i>- Or, you know, making love.</i>

540
00:33:08,420 --> 00:33:11,455
<i>And when I say "making love,"</i>
<i>I mean...</i>

541
00:33:11,457 --> 00:33:14,024
<i>...missionary fucking.</i>

542
00:33:14,026 --> 00:33:16,493
<i>No doggie. No cowboy.</i>

543
00:33:16,495 --> 00:33:18,996
- BARBARA: What the fuck are you doing?
- Baby!

544
00:33:18,998 --> 00:33:21,231
- What the fuck are you doing?
- I was reading e-mails.

545
00:33:21,233 --> 00:33:24,067
- You weren't. You were watching porno!
- That's not what that was.

546
00:33:24,069 --> 00:33:25,402
- I saw you!
- But, baby...

547
00:33:25,404 --> 00:33:27,237
Don't call me that. Oh, my God!

548
00:33:27,239 --> 00:33:28,372
That's the most disgusting thing
I've ever seen in my life!

549
00:33:28,374 --> 00:33:30,374
Wait, don't go right now!

550
00:33:30,376 --> 00:33:32,442
I don't even know what that is.
That's sick...

551
00:33:32,444 --> 00:33:35,045
- But, baby, I'm telling you...
- Don't call me that!

552
00:33:35,047 --> 00:33:37,748
But I'm telling you, that thing
I was watching was just a joke!

553
00:33:37,750 --> 00:33:41,518
Some dumb-ass buddy of mine sent
it to me as a joke. Come on!

554
00:33:41,520 --> 00:33:45,155
You think I'm the kind of guy
that watches porn?

555
00:33:46,257 --> 00:33:48,025
No, you didn't
seem like that type.

556
00:33:48,027 --> 00:33:49,693
Right. 'Cause fucking
losers watch porn,

557
00:33:49,695 --> 00:33:52,262
- guys that can't get laid.
- Well, no. My friends'

558
00:33:52,264 --> 00:33:54,564
boyfriends are watching porno
on the Internet all the time,

559
00:33:54,566 --> 00:33:57,067
- it's fucking disgusting.
- It's stupid is what that is.

560
00:33:57,069 --> 00:34:00,404
Why would they watch porn when
they can get with a real girl?

561
00:34:00,406 --> 00:34:03,440
- So you don't do that normally?
- No.

562
00:34:03,442 --> 00:34:05,809
When was the last time
you did that before this?

563
00:34:05,811 --> 00:34:08,812
(SCOFFS) I don't even know.
When I was a kid or something.

564
00:34:08,814 --> 00:34:11,214
You're never gonna do it again?

565
00:34:11,216 --> 00:34:16,119
No. Why would I?

566
00:34:16,121 --> 00:34:18,755
- Promise?
- I promise.

567
00:34:18,757 --> 00:34:20,724
Baby...

568
00:34:22,093 --> 00:34:23,493
I love you.

569
00:34:31,636 --> 00:34:34,137
Come here.

570
00:35:11,876 --> 00:35:15,312
- (COMPUTER CHIMES)
<i>- JON: It's not that I can't stop.</i>

571
00:35:15,314 --> 00:35:18,849
<i>I just figure, why should I? I mean,
my girlfriend doesn't like it.</i>

572
00:35:18,851 --> 00:35:20,684
<i>So she doesn't</i>
<i>have to know about it.</i>

573
00:35:20,686 --> 00:35:22,819
<i>It's not like</i>
<i>I'm cheating on her.</i>

574
00:35:22,821 --> 00:35:25,122
<i>I don't do it</i>
<i>when she's around.</i>

575
00:35:29,393 --> 00:35:31,161
<i>And everything's fine.</i>

576
00:35:33,531 --> 00:35:38,301
<i>She has been spending a lot of time at
my place, though. So I looked into it.</i>

577
00:35:38,303 --> 00:35:43,173
<i>And it's pretty amazing how easy it
is to get porn on-the-go these days.</i>

578
00:35:43,175 --> 00:35:45,775
<i>- So...</i>
<i>- </i> (MOANING)

579
00:35:52,817 --> 00:35:55,652
(NO AUDIO)

580
00:35:55,654 --> 00:35:59,623
- Excuse me? Sorry, were you on your phone?
- No.

581
00:35:59,625 --> 00:36:01,892
- I'm Esther.
- Good to meet you.

582
00:36:01,894 --> 00:36:04,361
- What's your name?
- Jon.

583
00:36:04,363 --> 00:36:06,429
- I hope I'm not bothering you.
- No, it's fine.

584
00:36:06,431 --> 00:36:09,166
I just wanted to apologize.
I don't know if you remember,

585
00:36:09,168 --> 00:36:12,202
you caught me in a kind of an
inopportune moment last week.

586
00:36:12,204 --> 00:36:15,272
- When I was sobbing by the door?
- Oh! Yeah, sorry,

587
00:36:15,274 --> 00:36:18,508
- I'm sorry about that.
- Please, don't. Please, don't you apologize.

588
00:36:18,510 --> 00:36:20,243
You didn't do anything wrong.

589
00:36:20,245 --> 00:36:22,712
- I felt like I should say something.
- OK. Well...

590
00:36:22,714 --> 00:36:26,650
Because I've been thinking about it,
a lot actually, and I realized that,

591
00:36:26,652 --> 00:36:30,554
you know, nobody's seen me
like that in, like, six months,

592
00:36:30,556 --> 00:36:33,490
- and it's not like it's rare...
- TEACHER: Good evening, everyone.

593
00:36:33,492 --> 00:36:37,394
(WHISPERING) ...a rare occurrence,
I mean, I do that all the time,

594
00:36:37,396 --> 00:36:41,865
I'm crying all the time. It's just
something that I do in private now.

595
00:36:41,867 --> 00:36:45,202
On the one hand,
you go there when you go there.

596
00:36:45,204 --> 00:36:48,338
On the other hand, it's really
fucked up to keep it hidden, right?

597
00:36:48,340 --> 00:36:51,274
That's what became clear to me
when you startled me.

598
00:36:51,276 --> 00:36:53,910
You didn't, you didn't mean
to startle me, you walked by,

599
00:36:53,912 --> 00:36:57,547
but I just...
so I wanted to say thank you.

600
00:36:57,549 --> 00:37:01,351
Were you... I'm sorry,
this might be rude,

601
00:37:01,353 --> 00:37:02,986
but were you watching
people fucking on your phone?

602
00:37:02,988 --> 00:37:06,223
- What? No!
- It's OK if you were. I'm not judging you.

603
00:37:06,225 --> 00:37:09,426
- Lady, I'm just here to take this class.
- Did you just call me "lady"?

604
00:37:09,428 --> 00:37:12,362
So you take care.

605
00:37:12,364 --> 00:37:14,497
Oh, yeah. Sorry. Say no more.

606
00:37:19,470 --> 00:37:22,405
- I'm sorry.
- No, it's fine.

607
00:37:35,519 --> 00:37:38,755
What, are you fucking kidding me?!
You're fucking kidding me, right?!

608
00:37:38,757 --> 00:37:40,490
- Baby!
- What?

609
00:37:40,492 --> 00:37:42,826
(RADIO PLAYS INDISTINCTLY)

610
00:37:52,403 --> 00:37:56,473
I feel like I should leave my jacket in the car.
Maybe not. Should I bring it?

611
00:37:56,475 --> 00:37:58,942
- Yeah, whatever you want.
- Oh...

612
00:37:58,944 --> 00:38:01,478
- I'm nervous. That's all.
- Why you nervous?

613
00:38:01,480 --> 00:38:03,380
- I don't know...
- You got nothing to be nervous about.

614
00:38:03,382 --> 00:38:06,383
You look beautiful.
God, you look beautiful.

615
00:38:06,385 --> 00:38:08,685
Oh. (LAUGHS)

616
00:38:08,687 --> 00:38:11,021
- Are you ready? Go ahead.
- Yeah. All right.

617
00:38:12,456 --> 00:38:14,291
- Hi, Mom.
- MOTHER: Hi.

618
00:38:14,293 --> 00:38:17,761
Oh, hello, hello!
You must be Barbara.

619
00:38:17,763 --> 00:38:22,599
- Hi, Mrs. Martello. For you.
- Thank you, and please call me Angie.

620
00:38:22,601 --> 00:38:28,505
Come in, come in. Jon! Jonny's here!
Come say hello to your son!

621
00:38:28,507 --> 00:38:31,541
- Please.
- Let me get by you there, babe.

622
00:38:31,543 --> 00:38:36,413
Dad? I would like you to meet
Barbara. Baby, this is my dad.

623
00:38:36,415 --> 00:38:39,349
- Hi, Mr. Martello.
- Hey, good to meet you.

624
00:38:39,351 --> 00:38:41,718
- Jesus Christ!
- Jon!

625
00:38:41,720 --> 00:38:45,322
Oh, I... I wasn't expecting
such a lovely lady, that's all.

626
00:38:45,324 --> 00:38:48,425
Thank you. It's so nice
to finally meet you both.

627
00:38:48,427 --> 00:38:50,660
My pleasure, my pleasure.

628
00:38:50,662 --> 00:38:53,730
Well, please sit down
and I will be right back.

629
00:38:53,732 --> 00:38:57,901
- Can I help you with anything at all?
- Oh! I love her already.

630
00:38:57,903 --> 00:39:02,972
- Yes, please, sweetie, come on.
- JON: You want me to take that, babe?

631
00:39:02,974 --> 00:39:05,742
- Hey, hey, Jonny-boy!
- She's cute, right?

632
00:39:05,744 --> 00:39:08,111
Are you fucking kidding me? You
didn't tell me you were bringing home

633
00:39:08,113 --> 00:39:11,548
- a piece of ass like that!
- I told you she was the most beautiful thing

634
00:39:11,550 --> 00:39:14,117
- I've ever seen in my life.
- Yeah, you told me, but I mean,

635
00:39:14,119 --> 00:39:16,453
Jesus Christ, those tits!
They're real?

636
00:39:16,455 --> 00:39:19,789
- Yeah, they're real.
- Oh! Fuck me!

637
00:39:19,791 --> 00:39:23,960
- ANGIE: Did you clear the table?
- Yeah, yeah. Here, honey.

638
00:39:23,962 --> 00:39:27,097
Let me move this here,
so you can put that right there.

639
00:39:27,099 --> 00:39:30,834
- Right here?
- Right there. That's perfect.

640
00:39:33,471 --> 00:39:36,139
BARBARA: So tell me.
Tell me, how did it go?

641
00:39:36,141 --> 00:39:39,676
ANGIE: I was out with some girlfriends.
We went to see some band.

642
00:39:39,678 --> 00:39:41,578
Back then you used to see bands
when you went out.

643
00:39:41,580 --> 00:39:45,081
- Honey, what band was it?
- You think I remember?

644
00:39:45,083 --> 00:39:48,651
It was 28 years ago, and I
didn't even give a shit then.

645
00:39:48,653 --> 00:39:50,854
Anyway, I saw him early
in the night,

646
00:39:50,856 --> 00:39:53,823
I don't know if he saw me
till later, but I saw him.

647
00:39:53,825 --> 00:39:56,726
And I saw her,
you couldn't miss her.

648
00:39:56,728 --> 00:39:59,996
- She was like you.
- Thank you.

649
00:39:59,998 --> 00:40:02,465
- You know what I said?
- Listen to this.

650
00:40:02,467 --> 00:40:07,404
I said right then, right
when I saw her, I said...

651
00:40:07,406 --> 00:40:09,072
..."That's mine."

652
00:40:09,074 --> 00:40:12,776
- Oh, God.
- ANGIE: Yup. And he was right.

653
00:40:12,778 --> 00:40:14,811
Can you... Well,
that's beautiful.

654
00:40:14,813 --> 00:40:17,981
- Oh! Big play! Look at that!
- OK, Jon.

655
00:40:17,983 --> 00:40:20,683
- All right, Dad.
- All right, yeah.

656
00:40:20,685 --> 00:40:24,421
- Good job, big guy.
- Sweetie, so nice to meet you.

657
00:40:24,423 --> 00:40:28,091
- Bye, Mr. Martello.
- Please call me Jon.

658
00:40:28,093 --> 00:40:30,193
OK, Mom.

659
00:40:30,195 --> 00:40:31,761
- All right, babe?
- Oh! Bye.

660
00:40:31,763 --> 00:40:33,029
- Bye-bye.
- Bye.

661
00:40:33,031 --> 00:40:35,865
- Bye-bye.
- Drive safe.

662
00:40:35,867 --> 00:40:41,471
- I love her! I love her!
- Pretty good, huh? Not bad at all.

663
00:40:41,473 --> 00:40:44,874
(CHURCH BELLS CHIMING)

664
00:40:56,720 --> 00:40:59,789
- (ORGAN PLAYS SOMBER MELODY)
<i>- JON: In the name of the Father,</i>

665
00:40:59,791 --> 00:41:01,458
<i>the Son and the Holy Spirit,</i>
<i>Amen.</i>

666
00:41:01,460 --> 00:41:03,493
<i>PRIEST: Amen.</i>
<i>Bless you, my son.</i>

667
00:41:03,495 --> 00:41:05,228
<i>Forgive me, Father, for I have</i>
<i>sinned. It has been one week</i>

668
00:41:05,230 --> 00:41:07,096
<i>- since my last confession.</i>
<i>- PRIEST: Tell me your sins.</i>

669
00:41:07,098 --> 00:41:10,066
Since last Sunday,
I had sexual intercourse

670
00:41:10,068 --> 00:41:11,901
out of wedlock seven times.

671
00:41:11,903 --> 00:41:15,205
But... I stopped watching porn.

672
00:41:15,207 --> 00:41:19,742
Yeah, no more of that,
just the intercourse now.

673
00:41:19,744 --> 00:41:21,544
So...

674
00:41:21,546 --> 00:41:24,614
For these and all the sins of my
life, I am sorry.

675
00:41:24,616 --> 00:41:27,650
- Five Lord's Prayers and five Hail Marys.
- Thank you, Father.

676
00:41:27,652 --> 00:41:30,653
PRIEST: Through the ministry of <i>the Church,
may God give you pardon and peace,</i>

677
00:41:30,655 --> 00:41:33,056
and I absolve you from your sins in
the name of the Father, of the Son

678
00:41:33,058 --> 00:41:35,625
- and the Holy Spirit.
- Amen.

679
00:41:35,627 --> 00:41:40,263
TEACHER: Very good. OK, when we come back,
we'll go over employee personality testing.

680
00:41:40,265 --> 00:41:42,732
Go ahead, take a break.

681
00:41:45,603 --> 00:41:48,771
- Hi. Mind if I sit down?
- You know, actually, I...

682
00:41:48,773 --> 00:41:50,740
- I brought you something.
- You what?

683
00:41:50,742 --> 00:41:52,642
- What's that?
- Open it.

684
00:41:52,644 --> 00:41:54,644
- I don't want to take that from you.
- No, no, open it.

685
00:41:54,646 --> 00:41:57,046
It's something silly.
It's a little thing. Go ahead.

686
00:41:57,048 --> 00:41:58,982
All right. I'll open it.

687
00:42:00,651 --> 00:42:03,052
- What the fuck is this?
- It's actually pretty good.

688
00:42:03,054 --> 00:42:05,021
- What is the matter with you?
- Have you seen it?

689
00:42:05,023 --> 00:42:07,657
- Are you crazy?
- It was made by this Danish woman

690
00:42:07,659 --> 00:42:12,295
in the '70s. It's probably not what you're
used to looking at, but it's pretty hot.

691
00:42:12,297 --> 00:42:16,065
OK. Look, I have a girlfriend,
all right? So...

692
00:42:16,067 --> 00:42:19,936
I'm sorry, did you think I was
hitting on you? Because I'm not.

693
00:42:19,938 --> 00:42:23,239
- Will you just take this?
- I didn't mean for it to be a big thing.

694
00:42:23,241 --> 00:42:26,743
I thought you could use something better than
that shit you're watching on your phone.

695
00:42:26,745 --> 00:42:29,679
- (SCOFFS)
- Am I right?

696
00:42:29,681 --> 00:42:32,615
If you have a girlfriend, why
are you watching dirty movies?

697
00:42:32,617 --> 00:42:35,084
- What?
- I'm just asking.

698
00:42:35,086 --> 00:42:38,321
- You're fucking weird, you know that?
- I don't entirely disagree,

699
00:42:38,323 --> 00:42:40,156
but you're the one who's
gonna pretend you're texting

700
00:42:40,158 --> 00:42:42,258
while you watch people pretend
they're fucking on your phone!

701
00:42:42,260 --> 00:42:44,627
The shit I watch on here,
they're not pretending.

702
00:42:44,629 --> 00:42:47,230
Of course they are.

703
00:42:49,166 --> 00:42:51,601
(TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING)

704
00:42:55,573 --> 00:42:57,807
(WHISPERING) Forgive us
our trespasses...

705
00:42:57,809 --> 00:43:01,711
...as we forgive those...
who trespass against us...

706
00:43:01,713 --> 00:43:06,783
...and lead us not...
into temptation...

707
00:43:06,785 --> 00:43:08,251
...but deliver us from evil...

708
00:43:08,253 --> 00:43:10,053
- Baby?
- Huh?

709
00:43:10,055 --> 00:43:12,922
What are you doing?
You talking to yourself?

710
00:43:12,924 --> 00:43:15,191
- Yo, Jonny, you coming out tonight?
- That's dubious.

711
00:43:15,193 --> 00:43:17,894
I'm gonna wait for Barbara to call.
We're gonna meet up for dinner.

712
00:43:17,896 --> 00:43:20,363
- This fucking guy. Come on!
- What did you think he was gonna say?

713
00:43:20,365 --> 00:43:23,199
I thought he still had a pair of
balls hanging between his legs.

714
00:43:23,201 --> 00:43:26,235
You sound so fucking stupid to me
right now, I feel sorry for you.

715
00:43:26,237 --> 00:43:28,371
- Fuck you.
- I do. I feel sorry for you.

716
00:43:28,373 --> 00:43:31,040
You never been in love, so you don't
know what you're talking about.

717
00:43:31,042 --> 00:43:33,176
Hold up. Wait a minute. In love?

718
00:43:33,178 --> 00:43:35,778
When you really love a girl,
there's a lot that goes into it.

719
00:43:35,780 --> 00:43:37,847
- You're saying you love her?
- Of course I love her.

720
00:43:37,849 --> 00:43:40,817
- I never heard you say you loved her.
- You weren't paying attention.

721
00:43:40,819 --> 00:43:43,853
I've been in love with this girl
since the first time I saw her.

722
00:43:43,855 --> 00:43:45,955
Why would I wanna go out
and try to pull randoms?

723
00:43:45,957 --> 00:43:47,991
None of 'em are gonna
look as good as my girl,

724
00:43:47,993 --> 00:43:49,959
none of 'em are gonna fuck me
as good as my girl.

725
00:43:49,961 --> 00:43:51,828
- Really?
- Yeah, really.

726
00:43:51,830 --> 00:43:54,163
- So she's good?
- What did I say? Yeah, she's good.

727
00:43:54,165 --> 00:43:55,999
- She's the best.
- So you titty-fuck her?

728
00:43:56,001 --> 00:43:59,769
Bro, she lets me do
whatever the fuck I want.

729
00:43:59,771 --> 00:44:02,372
This is what I'm trying to tell
you, if you would listen to me.

730
00:44:02,374 --> 00:44:06,376
I'm telling you guys something. You
be a man, you do the right thing,

731
00:44:06,378 --> 00:44:09,679
you find the right girl
and you treat her the right way?

732
00:44:09,681 --> 00:44:13,049
Watch what happens.
Best sex of your life.

733
00:44:13,051 --> 00:44:14,150
Hey, baby.

734
00:44:14,152 --> 00:44:16,886
- Hey.
- Hi.

735
00:44:16,888 --> 00:44:20,857
- I love it when you wear this shit.
- Oh, you're crazy.

736
00:44:23,861 --> 00:44:25,895
- You good?
- Yeah. You order anything yet?

737
00:44:25,897 --> 00:44:28,431
- No, I waited for you.
- Sweet.

738
00:44:30,401 --> 00:44:32,902
- Oh, fuck!
- Who's that?

739
00:44:32,904 --> 00:44:36,406
It's Linda. She's
been fighting with Chris.

740
00:44:36,408 --> 00:44:38,408
I don't think
they're gonna work out.

741
00:44:38,410 --> 00:44:41,778
- You remember Linda and Chris, yeah?
- Yeah, yeah.

742
00:44:41,780 --> 00:44:45,381
- I thought they were cute together, no?
- Sure. They seemed pretty good.

743
00:44:45,383 --> 00:44:48,751
She's 28 years old. She put like four years
into the guy already. It's terrible.

744
00:44:48,753 --> 00:44:51,754
- (MOANING)
- How did you get off work tonight?

745
00:44:51,756 --> 00:44:53,723
I got Stevie to cover my shift.

746
00:44:53,725 --> 00:44:56,059
- Stevie?
- Yeah, he needed the hours.

747
00:44:56,061 --> 00:44:59,395
- I don't think I know Stevie, no?
- I don't think you met him.

748
00:44:59,397 --> 00:45:03,332
- Oh! I wish somebody would cover for me.
- See? What did I tell you?

749
00:45:03,334 --> 00:45:05,868
The service industry,
it's not a bad thing.

750
00:45:05,870 --> 00:45:07,904
Come on, you're gonna
look so good in a suit.

751
00:45:07,906 --> 00:45:10,206
- I don't know.
- What? Please.

752
00:45:10,208 --> 00:45:12,108
If Armando can do it,
that man is such an asshole.

753
00:45:12,110 --> 00:45:15,378
- (MOANING)
- He treats women like they're trash, but...

754
00:45:15,380 --> 00:45:18,881
...he makes six figures.

755
00:45:18,883 --> 00:45:22,318
Well, he's got a pretty good life, no?
If he could do it, you could do it.

756
00:45:22,320 --> 00:45:25,354
- (MOANING)
- Hey, baby.

757
00:45:25,356 --> 00:45:29,358
You're a winner, right?
You respect people.

758
00:45:29,360 --> 00:45:30,960
- You listen to people.
- (MOANING)

759
00:45:30,962 --> 00:45:34,163
- You think so?
- I know so, mister.

760
00:45:34,165 --> 00:45:36,733
(MOANING)

761
00:45:53,117 --> 00:45:54,217
(HORN HONKING)

762
00:45:54,219 --> 00:45:57,286
Fucking 'caused it! Fuck!

763
00:46:36,860 --> 00:46:40,229
(PHONE VIBRATING)

764
00:46:45,402 --> 00:46:47,370
Hi, babe.

765
00:46:47,372 --> 00:46:50,339
I don't know which ones to get.
Baby, what do you think?

766
00:46:50,341 --> 00:46:53,509
That depends. You gonna
drill into your wall?

767
00:46:53,511 --> 00:46:55,278
I don't know.

768
00:46:55,280 --> 00:46:58,080
- You don't have a drill, do you?
- No.

769
00:46:58,082 --> 00:47:01,317
Nah, I didn't think so. My dad
has got a pretty good one.

770
00:47:01,319 --> 00:47:03,519
If you want me, I can borrow
his, I'll do it for you.

771
00:47:03,521 --> 00:47:08,024
- You gonna drill into my wall for me?
- Whatever you want, babe.

772
00:47:10,260 --> 00:47:13,396
You decide what color. I'm gonna
meet you at the registers.

773
00:47:13,398 --> 00:47:15,464
I wanna pick up a few things
in cleaning products.

774
00:47:15,466 --> 00:47:16,899
Where are you going?

775
00:47:16,901 --> 00:47:18,534
- What?
- Where are you going?

776
00:47:18,536 --> 00:47:20,436
I'm almost out of Swiffer pads.
I'm gonna pick a few up.

777
00:47:20,438 --> 00:47:22,338
- (LAUGHS) What pads?
- For the Swiffer.

778
00:47:22,340 --> 00:47:25,074
- I don't know what that is.
- You don't know the Swiffer?

779
00:47:25,076 --> 00:47:27,210
- What is that? No.
- Seriously? It's the best.

780
00:47:27,212 --> 00:47:29,245
You gotta try it.
What do you do for your floors?

781
00:47:29,247 --> 00:47:31,480
You got those nice floors at
your place. What, do you mop?

782
00:47:31,482 --> 00:47:35,017
- No.
- What do you do?

783
00:47:35,019 --> 00:47:38,888
- I don't know. I sweep it up with a broom.
- No, I mean to really clean it.

784
00:47:38,890 --> 00:47:42,391
- I don't know. The housekeeper does it.
- Oh, right.

785
00:47:42,393 --> 00:47:45,094
- Listen, I'll just be a second, OK?
- No, no, no. Come here.

786
00:47:45,096 --> 00:47:48,097
- What?
- You're not gonna go buy a mop right now.

787
00:47:48,099 --> 00:47:50,566
- It's embarrassing.
- No, I told you, it's not a mop.

788
00:47:50,568 --> 00:47:52,401
- It's these pads.
- I don't care.

789
00:47:52,403 --> 00:47:54,270
You shouldn't be doing
your own housework.

790
00:47:54,272 --> 00:47:56,172
- Why not?
- 'Cause you're a grown man.

791
00:47:56,174 --> 00:47:58,407
You shouldn't be
cleaning your own floors.

792
00:47:58,409 --> 00:48:00,142
Why? I enjoy doing it.

793
00:48:00,144 --> 00:48:02,078
You know what? I'll call
Rosa. She'll do your place.

794
00:48:02,080 --> 00:48:04,981
- Who?
- Rosa, my cleaning lady, she's great.

795
00:48:04,983 --> 00:48:07,483
Babe, no. Thanks, but
I like doing it myself.

796
00:48:07,485 --> 00:48:09,986
Are you kidding me?
You don't got to be doing that.

797
00:48:09,988 --> 00:48:12,588
She won't do it right anyway. You
gotta vacuum my carpet a certain way,

798
00:48:12,590 --> 00:48:15,258
- or else it looks...
- Don't talk about vacuuming in front of me.

799
00:48:15,260 --> 00:48:18,261
- Why? What's wrong?
- Why? Because it's not sexy, that's why.

800
00:48:18,263 --> 00:48:20,429
You're not listening to me.
I like my place, OK?

801
00:48:20,431 --> 00:48:22,098
I'm proud of it,
I like to take care of it.

802
00:48:22,100 --> 00:48:23,232
I don't care. We're not having

803
00:48:23,234 --> 00:48:24,667
this discussion right now.

804
00:48:24,669 --> 00:48:26,469
There's only a few things
I really care about...

805
00:48:26,471 --> 00:48:29,305
We're not talking
about this anymore.

806
00:48:34,611 --> 00:48:37,380
- Fine, let's drop it.
- Good.

807
00:48:40,017 --> 00:48:42,351
Those ones.

808
00:48:42,353 --> 00:48:44,687
- You want those?
- Yeah.

809
00:48:47,591 --> 00:48:49,625
Come here. Listen to me.

810
00:48:49,627 --> 00:48:53,262
When we're living together,
you're not...

811
00:48:53,264 --> 00:48:56,532
...going to be doing...
any cleaning.

812
00:48:57,467 --> 00:48:59,368
Come on.

813
00:49:11,949 --> 00:49:16,252
Jon? Excuse me. Look, I know
you don't wanna talk to me.

814
00:49:16,254 --> 00:49:18,120
I would leave you alone,
but I swear to God,

815
00:49:18,122 --> 00:49:20,456
I just fell asleep during
that entire class.

816
00:49:20,458 --> 00:49:23,526
The whole fucking thing.
Can I copy your notes?

817
00:49:23,528 --> 00:49:27,096
I'd ask somebody else, but everyone
in the class are like children.

818
00:49:27,098 --> 00:49:31,367
I'm not calling you old.
It'll take like five minutes...

819
00:49:31,369 --> 00:49:34,403
- Do you mind?
- Fine.

820
00:49:34,405 --> 00:49:37,440
Thank you so much. Do you wanna go somewhere?
There's a café...

821
00:49:37,442 --> 00:49:40,209
My girlfriend's
waiting at home, so...

822
00:49:40,211 --> 00:49:43,346
Oh. OK, well, then I'll...
OK, I'll do this.

823
00:49:51,321 --> 00:49:55,658
I really shouldn't get so high after
lunch if I'm gonna be coming here later.

824
00:49:57,227 --> 00:49:59,562
You're probably right.

825
00:49:59,564 --> 00:50:04,200
- It is pretty boring, don't you think?
- What?

826
00:50:04,202 --> 00:50:08,537
- I said this class is pretty fucking boring.
- Oh. Yep.

827
00:50:08,539 --> 00:50:11,140
Like they're teaching
you to be a robot.

828
00:50:14,277 --> 00:50:17,513
- Why are you here?
- Hm?

829
00:50:17,515 --> 00:50:21,217
- Why did you pick this class?
- I didn't.

830
00:50:21,219 --> 00:50:23,352
What?

831
00:50:23,354 --> 00:50:26,756
No, it seemed like a good idea.
I'm in the service industry now.

832
00:50:26,758 --> 00:50:29,325
- You mean you're a waiter?
- No.

833
00:50:29,327 --> 00:50:31,694
- Bartender?
- Yeah, so, if you wanna move up,

834
00:50:31,696 --> 00:50:33,729
- you gotta go to school.
- Right.

835
00:50:33,731 --> 00:50:39,368
But what do you mean you
didn't pick this class?

836
00:50:39,370 --> 00:50:42,271
- No, I did.
- Did somebody pick it for you?

837
00:50:42,273 --> 00:50:44,740
- No!
- Was it your parents or your girlfriend?

838
00:50:44,742 --> 00:50:46,709
- What is it with you? Huh?
- No, I just...

839
00:50:46,711 --> 00:50:49,211
- I was wondering...
- I'm doing something polite...

840
00:50:49,213 --> 00:50:51,580
That's mine.

841
00:50:51,582 --> 00:50:54,283
OK. Sorry.

842
00:50:57,687 --> 00:51:00,423
Jesus! (LAUGHS)

843
00:51:00,425 --> 00:51:05,161
- Oh, man! Oh, God!
- (ENGINE REVVING)

844
00:51:10,600 --> 00:51:14,503
- Hey, baby.
- Hi, Jon.

845
00:51:14,505 --> 00:51:17,740
What's wrong?

846
00:51:17,742 --> 00:51:20,276
Remember when we
first started dating?

847
00:51:20,278 --> 00:51:24,246
What's the one thing I asked?
I said, "Don't lie to me."

848
00:51:24,248 --> 00:51:27,483
- All right, who's talking shit about me?
- Nobody said anything.

849
00:51:27,485 --> 00:51:32,188
- You gotta help me out...
- You looked at 46 porno sites today, Jon.

850
00:51:32,190 --> 00:51:34,623
- Just today.
- I don't know what you're talking about.

851
00:51:34,625 --> 00:51:37,493
- Don't fucking lie to me!
- I don't know who told you that!

852
00:51:37,495 --> 00:51:40,129
Nobody said anything. It's
right there in your history!

853
00:51:40,131 --> 00:51:43,566
All you do is look at porno.
That's all you fucking do!

854
00:51:43,568 --> 00:51:48,137
- Wait, wait. My what?
- It's in your history.

855
00:51:48,139 --> 00:51:50,406
In your browser?

856
00:51:50,408 --> 00:51:53,209
Come on, don't tell me you don't
know what your history is.

857
00:51:53,211 --> 00:51:56,245
No. Of course you don't, 'cause if
you did, you would have erased it,

858
00:51:56,247 --> 00:51:57,613
like a good little phony. Here.

859
00:51:57,615 --> 00:52:02,451
There. Go ahead,
look. Go ahead.

860
00:52:06,857 --> 00:52:09,725
- Baby, I...
- Please, no, don't call me that.

861
00:52:09,727 --> 00:52:12,795
- I love you.
- Don't ever say that to me, ever again.

862
00:52:12,797 --> 00:52:15,297
- What do you want me to say?
- What do I want you to say?

863
00:52:15,299 --> 00:52:18,834
How about, "I'm sorry I've been
lying to you since the first day"

864
00:52:18,836 --> 00:52:21,570
- that we started dating"? How about that?
- I'm sorry. I am.

865
00:52:21,572 --> 00:52:24,306
How about,
"I'm sorry I have more sex

866
00:52:24,308 --> 00:52:26,308
with that thing than
I do with my girlfriend"?

867
00:52:26,310 --> 00:52:29,745
First of all, everybody
watches porn, OK? All guys.

868
00:52:29,747 --> 00:52:31,714
Any guy tells you he doesn't
is lying to you.

869
00:52:31,716 --> 00:52:33,716
- You are so full of shit!
- Second of all...

870
00:52:33,718 --> 00:52:37,453
- You are full of shit!
- Second of all, you know damn well

871
00:52:37,455 --> 00:52:39,421
- we do it all the fucking time!
- Yeah, I know we do.

872
00:52:39,423 --> 00:52:42,291
- Whenever you want!
- So what the fuck is wrong with you?

873
00:52:42,293 --> 00:52:44,793
What the fuck are you doing?
How do you watch that shit?

874
00:52:44,795 --> 00:52:47,196
I don't know! OK? I don't know!

875
00:52:47,198 --> 00:52:49,899
How do you watch all the stupid
fucking movies you watch?

876
00:52:49,901 --> 00:52:51,867
How do I watch movies?
What are you talking about?

877
00:52:51,869 --> 00:52:54,537
I'm saying, you probably watch
that shit as much as I watch porn.

878
00:52:54,539 --> 00:52:56,705
What are you saying? That has
nothing to do with anything!

879
00:52:56,707 --> 00:53:00,376
- I'm just saying...
- Jon, movies and porno are different!

880
00:53:00,378 --> 00:53:03,212
- They give awards for movies!
- They give awards for porn too.

881
00:53:03,214 --> 00:53:05,681
Shut up! Shut the fuck up!

882
00:53:10,353 --> 00:53:12,755
I can't believe we're
talking about this.

883
00:53:12,757 --> 00:53:14,890
I'm sorry. Jesus.
Look, stop it.

884
00:53:14,892 --> 00:53:17,860
I don't know, I don't
know what's wrong with me.

885
00:53:26,369 --> 00:53:30,472
I'm sorry, OK? I...
I'm sorry. I am so sorry...

886
00:53:30,474 --> 00:53:31,974
(GRUNTS)

887
00:53:35,545 --> 00:53:38,447
I really liked you, you know?

888
00:53:45,655 --> 00:53:48,857
I thought you were different.

889
00:53:48,859 --> 00:53:50,859
But you're not.

890
00:53:59,002 --> 00:54:01,437
(DOOR SLAMS)

891
00:54:12,015 --> 00:54:16,785
- (COMPUTER CHIMES)
<i>- JON: So up until now, my record was ten in one day.</i>

892
00:54:16,787 --> 00:54:20,723
<i>And for a long time, I thought I'd
never beat that. But today...</i>

893
00:54:20,725 --> 00:54:24,293
<i>- ...I hit 11.</i>
<i>- </i> (WOMEN MOANING)

894
00:54:25,929 --> 00:54:29,465
<i>JON: And you know, when I have</i>
<i>great fucking days like this,</i>

895
00:54:29,467 --> 00:54:33,836
<i>it just reminds me how much</i>
<i>I love being single.</i>

896
00:54:33,838 --> 00:54:36,972
<i>- I do what I want, when I want.
- </i> (WOMEN MOANING)

897
00:54:36,974 --> 00:54:40,809
<i>I don't have to flake</i>
<i>on my friends anymore.</i>

898
00:54:40,811 --> 00:54:43,579
<i>I don't have to waste my time</i>
<i>in a fucking classroom.</i>

899
00:54:43,581 --> 00:54:47,549
<i>It just feels good, like...</i>
<i>like I got my own life back.</i>

900
00:54:47,551 --> 00:54:51,320
- (MOANING)
<i>- I mean, you think I could have hit 11</i>

901
00:54:51,322 --> 00:54:54,323
<i>when I was with Barbara?</i>
<i>No! Definitely not.</i>

902
00:54:56,326 --> 00:54:58,727
<i>So...</i>

903
00:54:58,729 --> 00:55:02,698
(HIP-HOP PLAYS)

904
00:55:15,779 --> 00:55:19,315
- Jonny-boy!
- Jesus, bro, I can smell it on you already.

905
00:55:19,317 --> 00:55:21,784
- You got to catch up, baby!
- You mean I got to buy your poor ass

906
00:55:21,786 --> 00:55:24,987
- a fucking drink?
- Yo, the Don mad anxious tonight.

907
00:55:24,989 --> 00:55:26,555
- Fuck you!
- Where's wifey?

908
00:55:26,557 --> 00:55:29,425
- Fuck that bitch.
- Oh, shit!

909
00:55:29,427 --> 00:55:31,026
- Damn, OK!
- All right.

910
00:55:31,028 --> 00:55:33,062
You can't have this one,
'cause I saw her first,

911
00:55:33,064 --> 00:55:38,701
- but check out pink.
- JON: Yeah. She's all right.

912
00:55:39,536 --> 00:55:43,639
(HIP-HOP PLAYS)

913
00:55:56,686 --> 00:55:59,088
- Hey, fuck you, buddy!
- MAN: Fuck you!

914
00:55:59,090 --> 00:56:03,792
What'd you say? Huh? What the
fuck did you just say?! Hey!

915
00:56:03,794 --> 00:56:06,929
You wanna say some shit? Let's hear
it, you fat fuck! What did you say?!

916
00:56:06,931 --> 00:56:11,834
- MAN: I said fuck you!
- Fuck me, huh? Fuck me?

917
00:56:11,836 --> 00:56:15,871
Is that what you said?!
Huh? Huh? You fuck! Ah!

918
00:56:15,873 --> 00:56:19,875
- Fuck! Goddamn it! Fuck!
- (CAR HORN HONKING)

919
00:56:28,885 --> 00:56:31,687
(ORGAN PLAYS SOMBER MELODY)

920
00:56:34,891 --> 00:56:37,092
JON: In the name of the Father, <i>the
Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen.</i>

921
00:56:37,094 --> 00:56:39,828
<i>- PRIEST: Amen. Bless you, my son.
- Forgive me, Father,</i>

922
00:56:39,830 --> 00:56:41,897
<i>for I have sinned. It has been one
week since my last confession.</i>

923
00:56:41,899 --> 00:56:43,899
- Jonny, where were you?
- Don't worry about it.

924
00:56:43,901 --> 00:56:45,501
- What did you do to your...?
- Mom, it's fine.

925
00:56:45,503 --> 00:56:48,570
- Shh!
- Hey, hush yourself!

926
00:56:48,572 --> 00:56:50,906
Mom! It's fine. OK?

927
00:56:50,908 --> 00:56:56,044
<i>- PRIEST: Tell me your sins.
- Father, I don't know what happened, but...</i>

928
00:56:56,046 --> 00:56:59,415
...I guess I lost
my temper and I...

929
00:56:59,417 --> 00:57:02,484
I punched through this guy's
window on my way here right now.

930
00:57:02,486 --> 00:57:05,554
I didn't hurt anybody, but...

931
00:57:05,556 --> 00:57:08,490
Yeah, I don't know
what's wrong with me.

932
00:57:10,059 --> 00:57:13,629
Also, I watched pornographic
videos and masturbated 35 times.

933
00:57:13,631 --> 00:57:17,433
For these and all the sins
of my life, I'm sorry.

934
00:57:17,435 --> 00:57:20,869
- Twenty Lord's Prayers and 25 Hail Marys.
- Thank you, Father.

935
00:57:20,871 --> 00:57:23,872
<i>PRIEST: Through the ministry of the Church,
may God give you pardon and peace.</i>

936
00:57:23,874 --> 00:57:27,776
<i>I absolve you from your sins in the name of
the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.</i>

937
00:57:27,778 --> 00:57:29,144
Amen.

938
00:57:29,146 --> 00:57:31,046
So Barbara
couldn't come tonight?

939
00:57:31,048 --> 00:57:33,549
No, she had this
family thing tonight.

940
00:57:33,551 --> 00:57:35,818
But she wanted to make it,
she just couldn't.

941
00:57:35,820 --> 00:57:39,087
- She told me to say hello to you guys.
- That's sweet.

942
00:57:39,089 --> 00:57:41,449
Everything good
with the two of you?

943
00:57:43,092 --> 00:57:46,695
- Yeah, she's great.
- ANGIE: She's a catch, Jonny.

944
00:57:46,697 --> 00:57:49,131
Beautiful girl.

945
00:57:49,133 --> 00:57:53,735
I'm telling you, a woman like
that make a boy into a man.

946
00:57:53,737 --> 00:57:56,138
I can see it on you too,
it's starting.

947
00:58:01,911 --> 00:58:04,480
(TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING)

948
00:58:07,650 --> 00:58:10,018
(WHISPERING) Holy Mary...

949
00:58:10,887 --> 00:58:12,654
...Mother of God...

950
00:58:13,756 --> 00:58:15,991
...pray for us sinners...

951
00:58:17,861 --> 00:58:19,628
...now...

952
00:58:20,730 --> 00:58:22,731
...and at the hour of our death.

953
00:58:24,834 --> 00:58:26,702
Amen.

954
00:58:31,541 --> 00:58:34,009
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

955
00:58:41,017 --> 00:58:44,553
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

956
00:58:44,555 --> 00:58:46,588
What the fuck?

957
00:58:57,267 --> 00:58:59,968
- The fuck you doing here?
- Damn, really?

958
00:58:59,970 --> 00:59:03,605
- Bro, I'm busy.
- Word, what you doing?

959
00:59:03,607 --> 00:59:07,910
Right. Just 'cause you don't pick
up your phone don't make you busy.

960
00:59:10,747 --> 00:59:13,715
- You smashed up somebody's car?
- Who told you that?

961
00:59:13,717 --> 00:59:18,554
Kerry's sister said she heard you
broke through some guy's window.

962
00:59:18,556 --> 00:59:20,322
- Well, did you?
- The guy was a fucking asshole.

963
00:59:20,324 --> 00:59:22,124
- What did he do?
- Why you taking his side?

964
00:59:22,126 --> 00:59:24,059
- I'm not taking his side.
- You are.

965
00:59:24,061 --> 00:59:27,129
Stop and think for a second.
Stop and think for a second.

966
00:59:27,131 --> 00:59:30,566
I don't care about that guy, I don't
give a damn about his car. Fuck him.

967
00:59:30,568 --> 00:59:32,301
What do you think
I'm doing here, man?

968
00:59:32,303 --> 00:59:35,103
- You wanna have a seat?
- Bro, honestly...

969
00:59:35,105 --> 00:59:37,573
Man, sit your ass down.

970
00:59:43,680 --> 00:59:46,582
- All right, what happened with your girl?
- Fuck that bitch.

971
00:59:46,584 --> 00:59:49,051
- You said that already. What, she drop you?
- No.

972
00:59:49,053 --> 00:59:51,820
No? You drop her? After all
that, she cheat on you?

973
00:59:51,822 --> 00:59:53,822
- No!
- So, what happened?

974
00:59:53,824 --> 00:59:55,724
Nothing! It's so fucking stupid.

975
00:59:55,726 --> 00:59:57,259
That's what I'm saying,
she's a bitch.

976
00:59:57,261 --> 00:59:58,961
She did drop your ass.

977
00:59:58,963 --> 01:00:01,597
- What did you do, man? You cheat on her?
- No!

978
01:00:01,599 --> 01:00:05,300
All right, you wanna hear this
shit? It's so fucking retarded.

979
01:00:05,302 --> 01:00:07,769
She caught me watching porn.

980
01:00:07,771 --> 01:00:10,005
- That's it?
- Right?

981
01:00:10,007 --> 01:00:12,341
- That's bullshit.
- Swear to God.

982
01:00:12,343 --> 01:00:16,645
Oh, my God! OK, hold on,
hold on, all right.

983
01:00:16,647 --> 01:00:21,116
So after all that obligatory shit, the
friend mixing and meeting her folks,

984
01:00:21,118 --> 01:00:24,786
she just walks in on you, you know,
beating your meat to a little video

985
01:00:24,788 --> 01:00:26,655
- and she's out?
- You don't know her.

986
01:00:26,657 --> 01:00:29,358
- She's crazy, she's a princess.
- Goddamn!

987
01:00:29,360 --> 01:00:33,261
- I know.
- No, for real, that's some crazy bullshit right there.

988
01:00:33,263 --> 01:00:37,332
- Fuck that bitch.
- Yeah. Fuck that bitch.

989
01:00:39,068 --> 01:00:42,704
But you still gonna
finish that class?

990
01:00:42,706 --> 01:00:44,773
- Really?
- What are you, my mom?

991
01:00:44,775 --> 01:00:47,376
No, I just thought it was almost done.
How much longer you got?

992
01:00:47,378 --> 01:00:51,680
TEACHER: All right, everyone,
three more weeks until the final.

993
01:00:51,682 --> 01:00:56,318
If you have any questions or concerns, please
feel free to e-mail me. Have a good night.

994
01:01:14,437 --> 01:01:18,040
- JON: Hey.
- ESTHER: Hi.

995
01:01:18,042 --> 01:01:21,443
- JON: Where you going?
- ESTHER: To my car.

996
01:01:21,445 --> 01:01:25,047
(MOANING)

997
01:01:25,049 --> 01:01:27,249
- JON: Oh, shit!
- ESTHER: OK.

998
01:01:27,251 --> 01:01:30,218
JON: No, we're fine,
we're fine, we're fine.

999
01:01:30,220 --> 01:01:32,821
(JON GRUNTING)

1000
01:01:32,823 --> 01:01:35,090
Oh, my God!

1001
01:01:43,366 --> 01:01:46,735
Should've smoked this before,
you might've relaxed a little.

1002
01:01:46,737 --> 01:01:49,371
What's that supposed to mean?

1003
01:01:49,373 --> 01:01:53,975
I'm playing with you. Trust me, I'm
a perfectly satisfied customer.

1004
01:01:53,977 --> 01:01:57,312
- You want some?
- Thanks.

1005
01:02:01,184 --> 01:02:03,985
So I'm parked all the way on the other side.
I don't know if you want...

1006
01:02:03,987 --> 01:02:08,156
I know, you wanna get back, so let me enjoy
this and I'll drive you back to your car.

1007
01:02:08,158 --> 01:02:10,125
OK.

1008
01:02:12,195 --> 01:02:16,231
- So, what happened with your girlfriend?
- Fuck that bitch.

1009
01:02:16,233 --> 01:02:19,901
- That bad? She find somebody else?
- No.

1010
01:02:19,903 --> 01:02:23,505
Wanna know what happened?
I'll tell you what happened.

1011
01:02:23,507 --> 01:02:26,808
She snooped around on my computer,
she found out I watch porn.

1012
01:02:26,810 --> 01:02:29,778
I told her every fucking guy watches
porn, she didn't believe me.

1013
01:02:29,780 --> 01:02:34,049
She acted like I was cheating on
her or something, which I wasn't.

1014
01:02:34,051 --> 01:02:36,418
So... we broke up.

1015
01:02:36,420 --> 01:02:39,221
And you know what?
I'm glad we did.

1016
01:02:40,490 --> 01:02:42,924
- Just porn?
- Yeah.

1017
01:02:42,926 --> 01:02:45,961
- No, I don't buy it.
- I'm telling you. That's all.

1018
01:02:45,963 --> 01:02:49,464
Was it just once? Oh.

1019
01:02:49,466 --> 01:02:54,002
OK. So she caught you once, which is why
you're watching it on your phone at school,

1020
01:02:54,004 --> 01:02:56,471
'cause you're hiding it from her,
but she caught you the second time.

1021
01:02:56,473 --> 01:03:00,809
I don't know. Am I right?
I'm just guessing, but...

1022
01:03:00,811 --> 01:03:05,981
Oh, God, you're like
a junkie. You can't stop.

1023
01:03:05,983 --> 01:03:08,383
- How often do you watch it?
- What the fuck do you care?

1024
01:03:08,385 --> 01:03:13,922
- No, like every day?
- Every guy watches porn every day.

1025
01:03:13,924 --> 01:03:18,160
All right. When was the last
time you went a day without it?

1026
01:03:18,162 --> 01:03:20,295
- I don't know.
- No, come on, try and think.

1027
01:03:20,297 --> 01:03:22,964
- Seriously, I have no idea.
- Like this week, like this month?

1028
01:03:22,966 --> 01:03:26,968
No. I like my porn, OK? I watch it every day.
I always have.

1029
01:03:26,970 --> 01:03:30,539
Maybe when I was a kid, like before I
had a VCR in my room and I couldn't,

1030
01:03:30,541 --> 01:03:33,942
but even then
I had <i>Playboys,</i> so...

1031
01:03:33,944 --> 01:03:36,378
- Have you ever thought about quitting?
- Quit...?

1032
01:03:36,380 --> 01:03:42,050
- You're talking about it like... No, why would I?
- OK, let me ask you this.

1033
01:03:42,052 --> 01:03:45,487
You're a good-looking guy, I'm sure
you attract a lot of young ladies.

1034
01:03:45,489 --> 01:03:48,123
Why bother with porn when you
can have the real thing?

1035
01:03:48,125 --> 01:03:50,458
Nah, see, it's not
the same thing.

1036
01:03:50,460 --> 01:03:53,261
I mean, real pussy's all good,
but, no offense...

1037
01:03:53,263 --> 01:03:58,834
No, no, no offense taken. So
you like porn better than sex?

1038
01:04:02,171 --> 01:04:04,406
Well, what is it?
What do you get from porn

1039
01:04:04,408 --> 01:04:07,442
that you don't get from sex
with an actual person?

1040
01:04:08,878 --> 01:04:11,980
- I lose myself.
- You lose yourself.

1041
01:04:11,982 --> 01:04:14,983
Yeah, just... goodbye.

1042
01:04:14,985 --> 01:04:18,987
- And that doesn't happen when you have sex.
- I wish it did.

1043
01:04:18,989 --> 01:04:23,024
Sure, don't we all? Um...

1044
01:04:23,026 --> 01:04:26,862
OK. One more question,
then I'll drive you back.

1045
01:04:26,864 --> 01:04:31,032
- You ever jerk off without porn?
- What do you mean?

1046
01:04:53,456 --> 01:04:56,925
- (COMPUTER CHIMES)
<i>- JON: I'm not like a junkie. Come on, that's stupid.</i>

1047
01:04:56,927 --> 01:04:59,628
<i>It's porn,</i>
<i>it's not fucking heroin.</i>

1048
01:04:59,630 --> 01:05:05,066
<i>I knew a few guys in high school who
actually smoked crack, like all the time.</i>

1049
01:05:05,068 --> 01:05:10,639
<i>That's like a junkie. They couldn't stop.
I could stop if I wanted to. I could.</i>

1050
01:06:07,196 --> 01:06:08,630
- Hi.
- Hey.

1051
01:06:08,632 --> 01:06:12,267
- Somebody's excited.
- Yeah. Come on.

1052
01:06:12,269 --> 01:06:16,404
- I wanted to talk to you.
- Yeah? What about?

1053
01:06:17,540 --> 01:06:19,474
Don't you wanna...?

1054
01:06:20,576 --> 01:06:23,611
Don't you wanna wait
till after class?

1055
01:06:24,580 --> 01:06:26,514
OK.

1056
01:06:32,488 --> 01:06:34,255
All right. (LAUGHS)

1057
01:06:47,303 --> 01:06:51,072
You're... You're intense today.
What's going on with you?

1058
01:06:51,074 --> 01:06:53,475
- I gotta talk to you.
- I didn't think you meant that

1059
01:06:53,477 --> 01:06:55,443
- when you said it.
- Well, I did.

1060
01:06:55,445 --> 01:06:59,214
Well, I'm flattered.
What do you wanna talk about?

1061
01:06:59,216 --> 01:07:02,317
- (LAUGHS)
- Um...

1062
01:07:02,319 --> 01:07:04,019
So you were right.

1063
01:07:04,021 --> 01:07:05,653
- About what, your girlfriend?
- No.

1064
01:07:05,655 --> 01:07:08,456
I'm sorry.
I was right about what?

1065
01:07:08,458 --> 01:07:11,559
- I stopped watching porn.
- Oh, yeah? That's great!

1066
01:07:11,561 --> 01:07:13,194
- I don't know if it is.
- No, it is.

1067
01:07:13,196 --> 01:07:15,530
I wasn't gonna stop,
but then I was thinking about

1068
01:07:15,532 --> 01:07:19,467
what you asked me before,
if I ever jerk off

1069
01:07:19,469 --> 01:07:22,437
without watching porn,
and I tried to...

1070
01:07:22,439 --> 01:07:26,441
- Yeah? And you couldn't?
- No, I couldn't.

1071
01:07:26,443 --> 01:07:29,411
I don't know what's wrong with me. I've been
trying for a week, it's really fucked up.

1072
01:07:29,413 --> 01:07:35,683
- Oh, my God! You haven't cum in a week?
- Mm...

1073
01:07:35,685 --> 01:07:40,789
OK, wait. No. I want to
hear the rest of the story.

1074
01:07:42,525 --> 01:07:45,627
- So you haven't watched porn in a week.
- Yeah.

1075
01:07:45,629 --> 01:07:49,697
- That's good.
- What do you mean? You said you watched porn.

1076
01:07:49,699 --> 01:07:53,435
Uh, yeah, but that movie
that I gave you was totally...

1077
01:07:53,437 --> 01:07:55,403
- Did you ever watch it?
- No.

1078
01:07:55,405 --> 01:07:58,273
OK. It's totally unlike the stuff
that I imagine you watch every day.

1079
01:07:58,275 --> 01:08:01,109
- That is not healthy.
- What do you mean? How do you know?

1080
01:08:01,111 --> 01:08:04,245
Oh, my God, please!
That stuff is ridiculous

1081
01:08:04,247 --> 01:08:08,149
and it's nothing to do with actual sex.
That's why you have trouble with real women.

1082
01:08:08,151 --> 01:08:12,454
- No, I get off fine with real girls.
- Yeah, you definitely do.

1083
01:08:12,456 --> 01:08:15,757
Yeah, I just couldn't get off
beating it with my eyes closed.

1084
01:08:15,759 --> 01:08:20,795
But didn't you tell me last week that
you like porn better than real sex?

1085
01:08:20,797 --> 01:08:26,167
Well, honey, I'm gonna be honest with you,
'cause it seems like that's what you want.

1086
01:08:26,169 --> 01:08:29,704
Look, the way you have sex,
it's like totally one-sided.

1087
01:08:29,706 --> 01:08:32,540
It's like I'm not even there.

1088
01:08:32,542 --> 01:08:36,211
I mean, look, it's fine with me.
I'm not complaining.

1089
01:08:36,213 --> 01:08:38,847
It just so happens that meaningless sex
is something that I want in my life now,

1090
01:08:38,849 --> 01:08:42,550
but you said that you
wanna lose yourself in sex.

1091
01:08:42,552 --> 01:08:46,821
If you wanna lose yourself, you have
to lose yourself in another person.

1092
01:08:46,823 --> 01:08:51,593
And she has to lose herself
in you. It's a two-way thing.

1093
01:08:58,167 --> 01:09:00,201
You know what?
I shouldn't have said that.

1094
01:09:00,203 --> 01:09:02,570
- No, it's fine.
- No, no, no. I'm sorry. I am.

1095
01:09:02,572 --> 01:09:06,574
- What are you talking about?
- No. I'm really sorry.

1096
01:09:06,576 --> 01:09:08,843
I'm... I didn't mean
to hurt your feelings.

1097
01:09:08,845 --> 01:09:12,313
- You didn't. That's fine.
- No, I really didn't.

1098
01:09:14,517 --> 01:09:16,851
You know what?

1099
01:09:16,853 --> 01:09:18,920
Let's take a bath.

1100
01:09:18,922 --> 01:09:23,191
- What? Nah!
- No, come on. It'll be nice. It'll be nice.

1101
01:09:23,193 --> 01:09:26,427
Come on, let's take a bath.

1102
01:09:30,900 --> 01:09:33,401
I'm gonna get you a towel.

1103
01:10:02,198 --> 01:10:05,366
(SOBBING SOFTLY)

1104
01:10:42,371 --> 01:10:44,706
Hey, where were you?

1105
01:10:44,708 --> 01:10:47,342
I used one of the towels that was
in there, hope you don't mind.

1106
01:10:47,344 --> 01:10:49,344
Yeah, that's fine.

1107
01:10:49,346 --> 01:10:52,847
- What's wrong?
- Nothing.

1108
01:10:54,817 --> 01:11:00,722
- You don't live here alone, do you?
- I actually do.

1109
01:11:00,724 --> 01:11:06,494
There's some kind of...
bad marriage situation here?

1110
01:11:06,496 --> 01:11:09,297
- No.
- I know it's none of my business, sorry.

1111
01:11:09,299 --> 01:11:12,867
I don't wanna get caught out and now some
guy's coming at me with a bat or some shit.

1112
01:11:12,869 --> 01:11:15,970
No, it's nothing like that.

1113
01:11:15,972 --> 01:11:19,007
All right. So, what is it?

1114
01:11:19,009 --> 01:11:22,010
Since when do you ask me
personal questions?

1115
01:11:24,480 --> 01:11:26,447
Since right now.

1116
01:11:26,449 --> 01:11:29,684
- It really doesn't matter.
- Well, it seems like it matters to you.

1117
01:11:29,686 --> 01:11:31,753
No, it doesn't.

1118
01:11:31,755 --> 01:11:36,557
Didn't you tell me it's sort of fucked
up to keep stuff like this hidden?

1119
01:11:42,031 --> 01:11:47,368
My husband and my son
died 14 months ago.

1120
01:11:47,370 --> 01:11:48,903
- Jesus!
- Thank you.

1121
01:11:48,905 --> 01:11:50,571
What happened?

1122
01:11:50,573 --> 01:11:54,909
Cars are terrible things.

1123
01:11:54,911 --> 01:11:57,779
I'm sorry, but your hair
is so much better this way.

1124
01:11:57,781 --> 01:12:00,748
- What?
- I can touch it.

1125
01:12:00,750 --> 01:12:02,550
(LAUGHS) What are you
talking about?

1126
01:12:02,552 --> 01:12:04,619
You put so much
junk in your hair,

1127
01:12:04,621 --> 01:12:08,022
it's all sticky and hard,
this is much better.

1128
01:13:07,015 --> 01:13:09,851
(CONDOM WRAPPER CRINKLING)

1129
01:13:19,128 --> 01:13:21,896
(SOFT PANTING)

1130
01:14:03,505 --> 01:14:06,774
(GASPING)

1131
01:14:23,759 --> 01:14:26,227
(ENGINE REVVING)

1132
01:14:26,229 --> 01:14:28,129
(HIP-HOP SONG PLAYS OVER STEREO)

1133
01:14:28,131 --> 01:14:31,666
(SINGING WITH RADIO)
<i>♪ Good vibration</i>

1134
01:14:31,668 --> 01:14:35,069
♪ It's such a sweet sensation

1135
01:14:35,071 --> 01:14:39,207
<i>♪ It's such a good vibration ♪</i>

1136
01:14:39,209 --> 01:14:43,845
(RADIO) <i>♪ It's such</i>
<i>a sweet sensation ♪</i>

1137
01:14:43,847 --> 01:14:45,813
(SINGING WITH RADIO)
<i>♪ Yo! It's about that time</i>

1138
01:14:45,815 --> 01:14:47,748
<i>♪ To bring forth the rhythm</i>
<i>and the rhyme... ♪</i>

1139
01:14:47,750 --> 01:14:51,018
(CHURCH BELLS CHIMING)

1140
01:15:01,129 --> 01:15:03,231
(ORGAN PLAYS SOMBER MELODY)

1141
01:15:03,233 --> 01:15:05,600
JON: In the name of the Father, <i>the
Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen.</i>

1142
01:15:05,602 --> 01:15:08,135
<i>- PRIEST: Amen. Bless you, my son.
- Forgive me, Father,</i>

1143
01:15:08,137 --> 01:15:10,838
<i>for I have sinned. It has been one
week since my last confession.</i>

1144
01:15:10,840 --> 01:15:13,875
<i>- PRIEST: Tell me your sins.
- First of all, I lied to you before.</i>

1145
01:15:13,877 --> 01:15:18,846
I told you that, uh... Well, actually,
I don't know if it was you.

1146
01:15:18,848 --> 01:15:22,149
Something I've always kinda wondered is, is
it the same guy I'm talking to every week

1147
01:15:22,151 --> 01:15:27,655
or there's a few of you and you switch off, or...
how does that all work?

1148
01:15:30,025 --> 01:15:34,095
Well, anyway, I told the Father
a while back

1149
01:15:34,097 --> 01:15:40,101
that I stopped watching pornography, but
that was a lie, I didn't stop at all.

1150
01:15:40,103 --> 01:15:44,939
The thing is, this week I actually did stop,
like totally just not doing it anymore.

1151
01:15:44,941 --> 01:15:48,609
So...

1152
01:15:48,611 --> 01:15:52,146
- PRIEST: Yes?
- Yeah, so that's like zero for the week.

1153
01:15:52,148 --> 01:15:56,317
Other than that, I did have sex
out of wedlock one time,

1154
01:15:56,319 --> 01:16:01,656
but it was different, it wasn't
just sex, it was like...

1155
01:16:01,658 --> 01:16:06,661
I don't know, it's hard to explain, but...
yeah, that's it. So...

1156
01:16:06,663 --> 01:16:10,731
For these and all the sins
of my life, I am sorry.

1157
01:16:10,733 --> 01:16:12,800
PRIEST: Ten Lord's Prayers
and ten Hail Marys.

1158
01:16:12,802 --> 01:16:14,869
Really? Same thing,
no difference?

1159
01:16:14,871 --> 01:16:17,305
PRIEST: Through the ministry of
the Church, may God give you...

1160
01:16:17,307 --> 01:16:19,707
Wait! Father, I'm really sorry,

1161
01:16:19,709 --> 01:16:22,944
but could you just tell me how you
got to those numbers, please?

1162
01:16:22,946 --> 01:16:28,115
'Cause I... I really thought there
was gonna be a difference this week.

1163
01:16:31,820 --> 01:16:34,221
PRIEST: Have faith, my son.

1164
01:16:34,223 --> 01:16:36,991
Through the ministry of the Church,
may God give you pardon and peace,

1165
01:16:36,993 --> 01:16:41,963
and I absolve you from your sins in the name
of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.

1166
01:16:45,834 --> 01:16:50,871
- So, uh... me and Barbara split up.
- ANGIE: What?

1167
01:16:50,873 --> 01:16:56,277
- Barbara and I split up.
- I can't believe it, this is horrible!

1168
01:16:56,279 --> 01:16:58,613
- Can you get her back?
- I don't think so.

1169
01:16:58,615 --> 01:17:00,881
- Did you try to call her?
- She doesn't want me to call her.

1170
01:17:00,883 --> 01:17:03,184
- Look what you did.
- Sorry. What do you want me to do?

1171
01:17:03,186 --> 01:17:06,921
I just want you to be happy, that's all!
Is that too much to ask?

1172
01:17:06,923 --> 01:17:11,158
- I wasn't happy.
- A nice wife and some nice kids?

1173
01:17:11,160 --> 01:17:13,928
Look at me!
I look like a grandmother,

1174
01:17:13,930 --> 01:17:16,330
but do I have
any grandchildren? No!

1175
01:17:16,332 --> 01:17:18,733
Am I a bad mother,
is that what I'm hearing?

1176
01:17:18,735 --> 01:17:21,335
- Honey, calm down, please!
- You know, Ma, I don't know

1177
01:17:21,337 --> 01:17:24,171
- if I really want a wife and kids.
- What are you saying?

1178
01:17:24,173 --> 01:17:26,073
You don't mean that.

1179
01:17:26,075 --> 01:17:28,075
- Jon, say something!
- JON SR.: All right!

1180
01:17:28,077 --> 01:17:30,778
Stop upsetting your mother! What
the fuck is the matter with you?

1181
01:17:30,780 --> 01:17:33,180
- I don't know.
- Having a family is the greatest joy

1182
01:17:33,182 --> 01:17:36,117
- in a man's life, everybody knows that!
- Then maybe I'm not a man.

1183
01:17:36,119 --> 01:17:40,721
'Cause I sure don't want a family.
Maybe one day, but not right now!

1184
01:17:40,723 --> 01:17:43,791
- Well, and that's all she wanted.
- ANGIE: What did she say?

1185
01:17:43,793 --> 01:17:48,329
- SISTER: I said that girl...
- I cannot hear any fucking thing!

1186
01:17:51,299 --> 01:17:54,368
- What are you saying?
- All I'm saying is, that girl,

1187
01:17:54,370 --> 01:17:56,370
she has her own agenda.
She doesn't care about Jonny,

1188
01:17:56,372 --> 01:17:58,439
she doesn't know
the first thing about him.

1189
01:17:58,441 --> 01:18:01,375
She just wants a guy who's gonna
do whatever she tells him to.

1190
01:18:01,377 --> 01:18:04,045
It is a good thing
that she broke up with you.

1191
01:18:05,213 --> 01:18:09,183
- Thanks.
- You're welcome.

1192
01:18:17,292 --> 01:18:21,796
- Jon, I will fucking kill you!
- All right. Easy.

1193
01:18:26,468 --> 01:18:29,236
(TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING)

1194
01:18:40,816 --> 01:18:43,150
(TECHNO MUSIC FADES)

1195
01:18:55,464 --> 01:19:00,000
(SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)

1196
01:19:02,304 --> 01:19:04,939
(BOTH WHISPERING INDISTINCTLY)

1197
01:19:04,941 --> 01:19:10,745
All right, listen, listen, I gotta go,
so I'll see you later? All right. Bye.

1198
01:19:10,747 --> 01:19:12,346
- Sorry.
- That's cool.

1199
01:19:12,348 --> 01:19:15,149
- Sorry about that.
- No problem. How you doing?

1200
01:19:15,151 --> 01:19:18,052
- A little windy.
- Yeah, it's windy out here.

1201
01:19:18,054 --> 01:19:20,988
- So... I'm good. How are you?
- Good, thanks.

1202
01:19:20,990 --> 01:19:23,991
- Everybody good?
- Yeah, great.

1203
01:19:25,393 --> 01:19:28,095
- Thanks for meeting me.
- Sure.

1204
01:19:28,097 --> 01:19:30,431
Hope you understand why I thought
lunch was not a good idea.

1205
01:19:30,433 --> 01:19:32,166
That's fine.
You want some coffee?

1206
01:19:32,168 --> 01:19:34,502
No, actually I gotta
go pretty soon, so...

1207
01:19:37,806 --> 01:19:43,043
- (LAUGHS) You changed your hair?
- Yeah...

1208
01:19:46,448 --> 01:19:48,949
- So?
- Yeah, so...

1209
01:19:50,552 --> 01:19:53,387
I just wanted to apologize.

1210
01:19:53,389 --> 01:19:57,057
I lied to you,
and I'm sorry for that.

1211
01:20:02,531 --> 01:20:05,299
Well, that's
all you're gonna say?

1212
01:20:07,435 --> 01:20:10,938
I don't really know what I do
with that. What do I say?

1213
01:20:10,940 --> 01:20:13,541
I forgive you, or we're supposed
to get back together or something?

1214
01:20:13,543 --> 01:20:16,343
- No. No, I just wanted to tell you...
- You're not capable

1215
01:20:16,345 --> 01:20:18,012
of a relationship, Jon.

1216
01:20:18,014 --> 01:20:21,916
- You're not.
- No. Right now I'm not.

1217
01:20:21,918 --> 01:20:24,318
'Cause you're a selfish
person, and you're a liar.

1218
01:20:24,320 --> 01:20:28,489
- Yeah, I was. I'm sorry.
- I asked you to do one thing for me...

1219
01:20:28,491 --> 01:20:33,060
Yeah. I was thinking about
that when you said it before.

1220
01:20:33,062 --> 01:20:36,831
Well, I said it because
it's true, that's why.

1221
01:20:38,533 --> 01:20:42,203
- It's not true.
- Really?

1222
01:20:42,205 --> 01:20:45,439
You didn't only ask me for one thing.
You asked for a lot,

1223
01:20:45,441 --> 01:20:49,009
a lot of different things
and then...

1224
01:20:49,011 --> 01:20:50,578
...I couldn't do it
all for you.

1225
01:20:50,580 --> 01:20:53,214
Well, when a real man
loves a woman,

1226
01:20:53,216 --> 01:20:55,182
he doesn't mind
doing things for her.

1227
01:20:55,184 --> 01:20:57,551
He'll do anything for her.

1228
01:20:57,553 --> 01:21:03,157
Yeah, but don't you think that
sounds a little bit one-sided?

1229
01:21:03,159 --> 01:21:05,526
No, I don't.

1230
01:21:05,528 --> 01:21:09,363
But that's why you like to watch
those whores in those videos,

1231
01:21:09,365 --> 01:21:11,565
because you don't gotta
do anything for them, right?

1232
01:21:11,567 --> 01:21:17,037
Yeah, that's one-sided
also. Definitely.

1233
01:21:18,440 --> 01:21:22,409
Look, sweetie,
I'm gonna go, OK?

1234
01:21:25,247 --> 01:21:27,548
Don't call me anymore.

1235
01:21:35,957 --> 01:21:38,259
The streak is over,
motherfucker! How's it feel?

1236
01:21:38,261 --> 01:21:41,495
- I'd rather get pizza with my boys.
- That's new.

1237
01:21:41,497 --> 01:21:45,432
Every fucking time we go out,
Don Jon smashes!

1238
01:21:45,434 --> 01:21:47,902
But not tonight,
ladies and gentlemen.

1239
01:21:47,904 --> 01:21:51,105
The fans are devastated.
Jonny, what happened?

1240
01:21:51,107 --> 01:21:53,407
Yeah! Well, I thought it was on
with old crop top.

1241
01:21:53,409 --> 01:21:55,676
- No, that girl was annoying.
- She was tight though.

1242
01:21:55,678 --> 01:21:57,611
- Eight.
- Solid eight.

1243
01:21:57,613 --> 01:21:59,947
Her body was at least an eight,
but you didn't talk to her.

1244
01:21:59,949 --> 01:22:02,449
- Who cares how she talks?
- You asked why I didn't smash,

1245
01:22:02,451 --> 01:22:06,453
that's why I didn't smash. What about you?
You were kicking it to pony-tail, right?

1246
01:22:06,455 --> 01:22:09,423
- How did it go?
- You get her name?

1247
01:22:09,425 --> 01:22:12,559
- I got a number.
- BOTH: Oh! Hey!

1248
01:22:12,561 --> 01:22:14,561
- You like that?
- Fucking right I do!

1249
01:22:14,563 --> 01:22:19,400
- Easy, easy. Did you get her name?
- Yeah!

1250
01:22:19,402 --> 01:22:20,968
Wait...

1251
01:22:22,971 --> 01:22:24,638
- Oh, fuck!
- What?

1252
01:22:24,640 --> 01:22:26,240
I saved it as pony-tail.

1253
01:22:26,242 --> 01:22:28,976
- (LAUGHS) Danny-boy!
- Danny-boy!

1254
01:22:28,978 --> 01:22:32,513
All right, all right, all right.
Take it easy, take it easy.

1255
01:22:44,626 --> 01:22:46,527
<i>JON: This fucking lady.</i>

1256
01:22:46,529 --> 01:22:50,664
I don't usually like it when a
girl looks me right in the eye,

1257
01:22:50,666 --> 01:22:52,433
<i>and this girl does that a lot.</i>

1258
01:22:52,435 --> 01:22:54,668
<i>But I don't know what it is</i>
<i>about her.</i>

1259
01:22:54,670 --> 01:22:57,104
<i>When she does it, I don't mind.</i>

1260
01:22:57,106 --> 01:23:01,575
<i>I just look right back at her,</i>
<i>and pretty soon...</i>

1261
01:23:01,577 --> 01:23:03,677
<i>...I'm hard as a fucking rock.</i>

1262
01:23:03,679 --> 01:23:06,413
<i>It's like she knows</i>
<i>what I'm thinking.</i>

1263
01:23:06,415 --> 01:23:09,416
<i>Or I know what</i>
<i>she's thinking, or...</i>

1264
01:23:09,418 --> 01:23:13,654
I don't know, it's that two-way
<i>thing. I fucking love it.</i>

1265
01:23:16,057 --> 01:23:20,394
<i>And I don't mean love like, "I
love her, I wanna marry her."</i>

1266
01:23:20,396 --> 01:23:23,430
<i>I'm definitely not thinking</i>
<i>about all that shit.</i>

1267
01:23:23,432 --> 01:23:26,233
<i>And she's not either.</i>

1268
01:23:27,202 --> 01:23:29,570
<i>She can't.</i>

1269
01:23:33,041 --> 01:23:36,076
<i>I guess I just mean love like,</i>

1270
01:23:36,078 --> 01:23:40,547
<i>you know, like</i>
<i>when we're making love.</i>

1271
01:23:40,549 --> 01:23:45,219
<i>And while we're doing it, all
the bullshit does fade away,</i>

1272
01:23:45,221 --> 01:23:48,455
<i>and it's just me and her,</i>
<i>right there,</i>

1273
01:23:48,457 --> 01:23:52,126
<i>and yeah, I do lose</i>
<i>myself in her,</i>

1274
01:23:52,128 --> 01:23:55,562
<i>and I can tell she</i>
<i>is losing herself in me,</i>

1275
01:23:55,564 --> 01:24:01,402
<i>and we're just fucking...</i>
<i>lost together.</i>

1276
01:24:03,027 --> 01:24:09,327
<font color="#ff0080">subtitle Created by</font>  <font color="#ffff00"><b> JOYDEEP 0O7 </b></font> <font color="#ff0080">from Subscene.com</font>

1277
01:24:10,245 --> 01:24:13,047
(HIP-HOP PLAYS)

1278
01:24:13,049 --> 01:24:15,616
<i>♪ It's such a good vibration</i>

1279
01:24:15,618 --> 01:24:17,284
<i>♪ Come on, come on, come on</i>

1280
01:24:17,286 --> 01:24:20,287
♪ It's such a sweet sensation

1281
01:24:20,289 --> 01:24:24,658
<i>- ♪ Feel it, feel it
- ♪ It's such a good vibration ♪</i>

1282
01:24:24,660 --> 01:24:27,594
♪ It's such a sweet sensation

1283
01:24:27,596 --> 01:24:32,633
<i>- ♪ Feel the vibration
- ♪ It's such a good vibration ♪</i>

1284
01:24:32,635 --> 01:24:36,537
♪ It's such a sweet sensation

1285
01:24:36,539 --> 01:24:40,307
<i>♪ It's such a good vibration</i>

1286
01:24:40,309 --> 01:24:46,146
<i>♪ It's such a sweet sensation ♪</i>

1287
01:24:48,750 --> 01:24:52,352
(ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYS)

1288
01:26:21,509 --> 01:26:24,578
(INSTRUMENTAL HIP-HOP PLAYS)

1289
01:26:46,901 --> 01:26:49,870
(ORCHESTRAL MUSIC PLAYS)