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♪ I took a plane, I took a train ♪
♪ Ah, who cares? You always end up in the city ♪
♪ I said to Carl, "Look up for once" ♪
♪ See just how the sun sets in the sky ♪
- How's this? - Cool.
Sexy. I like it.
I think I'm going to change.
Stop eating the salad.
Come in.
I wanted to let you know people are starting to arrive.
Great. Is Alex here yet?
Uh, no. But she is gonna be bringing her bean salad.
Ah. Alex is on Alex time...
...and there's never a good time for that bean salad.
But you know what? Let's... Let's give her a break today.
Mom, you are always making excuses for her. You realize that, right?
It's 'cause she's my favorite child.
- Okay, the truth finally comes out. - Oh!
- Ouch! - I'm still your favorite son, right?
Oh, sure.
"Why aren't you married yet?"
"Why do you work in a record store?"
"Why'd you give up teaching?"
"Why didn't you finish college?"
Why didn't you finish college?
I'm a life guy. I learn by living, you know?
You love that about me.
Right, right.
Right.
Hey, how about this?
What about we go in there, we say our hellos,
and then you give me the high sign, we sneak off to your childhood bedroom
and make out surrounded by the Barbies and Kens.
Mm, you're not getting anywhere near my Barbies, buster.
Hmm.
- I'm going to take this into the kitchen. - Okay.
- Hey, Lucas. Hey, Zoe. - Hey!
Happy baby shower.
- There it is. Looks good. - Yeah. Famous bean salad.
Yeah.
Super good.
Auntie Allie!
Hi, guys.
This party is so boring, and Dad won't let us have cake until later.
What is it with parents, huh?
How about one of our famous scavenger hunts?
Okay, I want six items that I could find in Harry or Hermione's room.
And bonus points for anything that can be used to make boring adults disappear.
Got it?
Oh, one second.
You guys need proper nutritional preparation before we commence.
Okay.
- Zoe, I want you to meet Julia. - Hi.
- Nice to meet you.
Alex! Hi!
Oh, Kelly, wow. Oh my God, look at you.
No, don't. I'm so big.
But so beautiful.
Aw, why, thank you.
I heard you had to give up teaching.
- And you're working for your mother now? - Yeah.
And your boyfriend has a job at a record store?
I didn't know there were record stores anymore.
Uh-huh. There's one left.
The rest of the time, he's developing a video game called
either American Zombie: Blood Apocalypse or Playground Armageddon.
And one day, you'll make your mommy buy it for you.
Yes, you will. Yes, you will!
I've got to go grab Alex for a second.
Elizabeth, I am dying for you to meet my friend Katie.
She's a huge fan of Rose Cosmetics. Come meet her. Two seconds, two seconds.
Oh my God. Thank God you're here.
I thought I was the only woman under 40 not pregnant or lactating.
Hi. How are you?
Insufferable bitches. I hate them all.
Yeah. They're just jealous because they don't get out anymore.
Yeah. Except you don't go out anymore either.
Or even call your friends back.
What is going on with you?
Anybody want a gummy?
Yes. Can I have the, uh...
- They're five milligrams... - Awesome.
- Times four. You should be good to go. - Excellent.
- See you in five hours. - You're not driving home, right?
- Then you're fine. - Where's Elliot?
- We broke up. - Sorry.
- I gotta go. - Yeah. No, it's fine.
I've already gone on two--
Did you give the kids cake?
Uh...
Oh yeah.
- That was me. - Definitely.
Julian, relax. I mean, right? Like, all we're saying is...
- Let them eat cake. - Lots of it.
What could possibly go wrong?
Let's go to Auntie Alex's room. Maybe she has a fountain pen.
- Slow down! - Hurry up already!
- ♪ Sayin' what you gon' do to me ♪ - ♪ Uh-huh ♪
♪ But I ain't seen nothin' ♪
♪ I'm telling you To loosen up my buttons, babe ♪
♪ Typical ain't hardly The type I fall for... ♪
Finn, you have a really big willy.
Thank you.
- Am I grounded? - Forever.
- I don't think Julian'll ever forgive you. - Is that a promise?
- Hi. - Hi.
Mmm.
Hmm.
Seriously, though. What is going on with you?
- What do you mean? - Um...
I don't know. I feel like maybe you're floundering a little bit.
Feeling a little lost.
Lost?
I have a new boyfriend and a great job.
Working for your mother?
Selling makeup to women twice your age? What a dream.
Yeah, but it's a job.
With a future and security, and a job I thought I was getting pretty good at.
Yeah, you're good at it.
It's not who you are.
It's not what you're passionate about.
- Passion is overrated. - What?
It is. It never lasts, and it's completely exhausting.
Besides, isn't that what my generation is all about?
Lowering expectations and letting go of childish dreams?
Alex, you do not believe that.
Besides, I love working for you, Mom.
I do.
You built this incredible business all by yourself, and...
and I want to be a part of it.
And make you proud.
Well, since you put it that way.
- Mom. - Hmm?
I have some news.
Oh?
Finn officially asked me to move in.
Oh.
Well, at least until I find a new place. In the meantime, we both save on rent.
How romantic.
Why do you guys all hate him?
Is it because he didn't finish college?
Neither did Steve Jobs.
I do not hate Finn.
I think he is a very sweet boy
who loves video games
and apparently has a large--
Oh my God, Mom. You have to stop.
Okay, I'll stop.
For now.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
I have news too.
It's back.
Yeah.
Okay.
Okay, so they'll just have to get rid of it again.
No.
We'll find another doctor, and...
And I read about these treatments they're doing in Germany
that apparently are really effective.
And I will stop working...
- Alex. - And move in.
And I will take care of you until you get better.
No.
No magic treatments in Germany.
No cure that's ten times worse than the disease.
It's not going to make a difference.
Not this time.
Come here.
What am I going to do with you?
What am I going to do without you?
Hey, sweetie.
Ready to make an appearance?
Gonna be okay?
- Hi, Sam. - It's good to see you. Really is.
- Don't you think it's surreal? - How do you mean?
All of these people here except the one person who's supposed to be.
I keep expecting her to walk out of the kitchen and tell me to stop slouching.
I didn't know Dad was gonna be here.
They were married for 20 years, most of them, happy.
- Of course he was gonna be there. - Whatever.
I just hate when he talks as if
the divorce was some kind of mutual decision.
Like, bro, he left her.
I hope your mom was clear about dividing stuff up.
You don't wanna be like the Nelsons. They don't talk to each other anymore.
Agreed. As long as I get the Tamayo painting in the front hall.
God, Mom's barely been gone a week, and all you can talk about is her stuff?
That's easy for you to say. You're inheriting the company.
You don't know that. I've barely worked a year.
Why do you think Catherine spent so much time training you?
God, you make me sound like a pet.
Stop it, both of you.
Alex is doing great at work.
She's entirely ready for what's ahead.
Hello, everyone. Apologies for being late.
I'd just like to say how truly sorry I am for your loss.
Uh, who are you exactly?
My name is Brad Ackerman.
I worked with your mother on the final draft of her will.
- Where's old man Sullivan? - Mr. Sullivan is in his office.
Um, it's Brad, right?
I'm sorry, but are you even a partner here?
I'm an associate partner.
Maybe we should ask to see his law degree.
You must be Alex.
And let me guess,
Julian, Catherine, Lucas, and Zoe.
Congratulations on the birth of your daughter, Emma.
Thank you.
Your mother was an amazing woman.
Even when she was sick, she was so strong and funny,
and, I don't know if this makes any sense,
present in everything that she said and did.
I'm honored she chose me to be the executor of her estate.
Shall we begin?
"I, Elizabeth Rose,
a resident of Brooklyn, New York, and a citizen of the United States,
declare this to be my final will."
This is so weird.
"To Julian, I leave my Loeb edition of Plato's works."
"A gentle reminder that he may not always be the smartest person in the room."
"The Tamayo painting, an evocative reminder of the heritage of our family,
I leave to Zoe."
"She can share it with Lucas, as long as he never leaves her."
I would never.
Next is your mother's house.
"It is my wish that neither the house nor its contents
be sold or leased for 12 months."
"My children may inhabit the home during this time,
but for no longer than 90 consecutive days."
Whoa, sorry to interrupt.
Did our mother explain why she wanted us to keep the house?
I wish we could keep it forever.
The house is Mom. It's our history.
Yeah, that's sweet, Alex. Do you know what the taxes are?
Brad, are you sure she understood how expensive this will be?
In fact, she made provisions to cover any costs.
Shall we move on to Rose Cosmetics?
"My children's shares of Rose Cosmetics will stay at 20%."
"The remaining shares and title of CEO will go to my daughter-in-law,
Catherine Williams Rose."
Wait, what?
Your mother's remaining shares
of Rose Cosmetics will go to your sister-in-law,
Catherine.
Her last directive is that Catherine appoint a new head of marketing.
But I'm head of marketing.
Not after today.
So I'm fired?
She's firing me from the grave? What...
Aren't there, like, laws or something against that?
"Finally, my beloved daughter, Alexandra,
is to collect her inheritance at a later date."
And there is an asterisk here which I'm meant to explain to you privately.
This is insane.
I mean, how long have you actually been doing wills and dying?
I've been doing estate planning at the firm for three years now.
Three years. Wow.
You're basically a regular Thurgood Marshall.
That's nice, thank you. I appreciate that.
- Please don't talk to me like that. - Or what? You'll take away my inheritance?
I'd like you to consider that your mother was a very intelligent woman
whose main concern is what's best for you.
- Right, as in firing me. - Trust her.
- And disinheriting me. - She did not disinherit you.
Her only daughter. And I get nothing. Not even a piece of furniture!
I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that this is about money
and jewelry and whatever.
But the thing is,
yesterday, the only thing that I wanted was her bed.
That's it. I just wanted her old rickety iron bed
so I could just lay in it and curl up...
and just pretend that she was still with me.
I know how close you and your mother were.
She told me many times.
She just had something else in mind for you.
What is this?
She wanted you to open it when you were alone.
Do you have a DVD player?
Yeah. It's in the closet next to the VCR and the butter churn.
My boyfriend has an Xbox.
Yeah, that'll work.
Go home. See what's in the envelope.
Hopefully some of this will start to make some sense.
My lawyer will be in touch.
I... I am your lawyer.
Finn?
Hello?
Hey, Bean.
You must be so pissed off.
It's not funny, Mom, and--
It's not funny, I know.
But I'm gonna explain, okay?
Last week, I was getting my so-called affairs in order.
Oh my God, the crap that we hold onto for no apparent reason.
But it was actually this amazing life flashback. You know?
I mean, it was actually a you flashback.
I got to... Look at all this stuff I found.
Look, all your finger paintings, report cards.
But in the middle of it all, I found this piece of paper.
A life list.
Your life list.
I love this list.
This list is such a reflection of who you are.
Who I was. I was 13 when I wrote it.
And I know, obviously, you have changed.
Oh my God, it's like she's listening to me.
And I think that's my concern,
is that I don't know that you have replaced this with anything.
I wonder, have you given up your dreams and your aspirations?
Your goals?
And don't tell me Rose Cosmetics, because
I feel like I gave you this cozy job
that allowed you to run away from who you really are.
- Thanks a lot. - So okay, let's look at the list.
"Help people and make a difference."
"Be a great teacher."
Alex, you are a born teacher.
Okay, "learn to drive, get a tattoo." You can skip those, please, dear God.
My one request...
"Find true love."
Why do I have a horrible feeling you've given up on that too?
That's not fair.
I want you to know how incredible you are.
I want you to live your best life.
You have to get yourself out of this hole you're in.
I'm not in a hole.
I'm sorry, that's not up for discussion.
I'm not gonna be around to dig you out, but I can sure as hell leave you a shovel.
I want you to complete this list, Bean.
Hold on.
Mom, you can't just say that and...
Okay. Every time you check off something from the list,
Brad is going to give you one of these DVDs,
which I am going to record.
And once the list is completely finished, you will get this envelope.
But the clock is ticking.
The list has to be finished by New Year's. Otherwise, no envelope.
Oh my God, I can't believe this.
I'm not screwing around, Bean.
This is serious business.
This is your life.
And I love you.
See you on the next DVD.
This is crazy.
"Go all out in a mosh pit."
"Play one-on-one with a New York Knick."
"Do stand-up comedy." Walk me through that.
Lucas and I once swore that we would do open mic night at the Comedy Cellar.
And... and I still have the jokes I wrote.
- I gonna need to read those. - "Make peace with Dad."
"Be a great teacher." You can do these.
- Mm-hmm. - You should do these.
Why? So I can inherit some money?
- Yeah. - No, it's just gross.
Besides, I swore that I would never step foot into a classroom ever again.
Oh my God, who cares? Temp for a couple of weeks.
Roll out one of those rickety TVs, pop on Land Before Time, and then voilà.
Or maybe you enjoy teaching again.
Isn't that the idea here?
Not my idea.
Alex. I've known you for a long time.
You'd never enjoy running that company, no matter what you tell yourself.
Love when you guys get real.
Hmm, "Find true love."
You love Finn, right?
He's so sweet, so fun.
Apparently has a ginormous willy.
There's been three new iPhones since you've been together.
You should know by now if you love the guy.
Yeah, but living together was just supposed to be like a temporary thing,
and then Mom got sick, and it just seemed, you know, easier not to find my own place.
Which is exactly what she meant.
You're not dealing with shit.
Like not telling Finn about the list?
Do you remember when Lucas and I broke up before we got engaged?
The whole world remembers. Didn't Anderson Cooper do a special?
Hilarious.
I asked your mom for advice, and she told me about her true love test.
Remember that?
Vaguely.
There's four questions you're supposed to ask yourself?
Or is that Passover?
Yes, four questions.
One, can you tell him everything in your heart?
Two, is he kind?
Three, does he help you become the best version of yourself?
Meaning?
Alex in full flight with Finn.
Four, can you imagine him as the father of your children?
Elizabeth said to ask myself those questions,
and if Lucas passed, I was on my way.
This is totally crazy. I know.
But I trust your mom.
Besides, what have you got to lose?
Is Finn kind?
Absolutely.
Does he help me become the best version of myself?
Can I tell him everything in my heart?
I can barely tell myself.
Can I imagine him being the father of our children?
What the hell are you doing?
- Oh, hey, babe. - Hi.
I'm just, uh...
...doing the stoner test of my game.
The what?
The stoner test?
Kids like to play video games stoned,
so you have to make sure it's still easy enough while you're high,
but still super challenging when you're not high.
Know what I mean?
I need to talk to you about something.
Like, now?
Yeah.
You know, as a life motivator, this is kind of genius.
I think you should totally go for it. I mean, it's your inheritance.
- Really? - Yeah.
Think about how much freedom it would give you. Both of us, actually.
I mean, I could finish designing American Zombie,
you'd run the company instead of teaching.
What company?
The gaming company I'm always talking about.
You'd be like the... the brander or whatever, and we'd hang 24-7.
Wait, is that how you see me?
Working for you at your non-existent gaming company?
No, it's our company.
Come on, it'd be fun working together again.
Remember when we used to have fun before your whole
death fixation?
Finn, my mother just died.
I know, but I think you should try having fun again, because fun is so... so...
- So fun? - Yeah.
Fun's fun. That's actually... See, that's a great slogan for the company.
And fun's way more fun with some scratch in your pocket.
Like, say we want to have kids one day. How are we supposed to afford that?
I'm sorry, now you want to have kids?
Not really, but I know you will.
So what else do we have to do?
Mosh pit? Cool.
Get tattoos?
Why not matching?
Find true love?
Baby, I want to make true love to you right now on the Crate and Barrel.
Mm-mm.
Alex, come on! You're totally overreacting!
Come up and let's talk about this!
You don't have to work at the video game company. I was joking!
It was a joke!
It was a funny joke.
I hope you're happy.
No thanks.
Your mother would be so happy.
Yeah, well, like Zoe said, what have I got to lose?
I'm single, unemployed, and I like crossing things off of lists.
Plus, it's the only way that I get to see my mom's DVDs, right?
Yes, there's another one waiting for you every time you do an item on the list.
- Can I ask you something? - Yep.
DVDs? Seriously?
Your mother wanted you to have something tangible, you know, that you could keep.
Is that your girlfriend?
Nina. She lives in Chicago.
- May I? - Yeah.
Wow.
- She's, like, really beautiful. - You say that like it's a big surprise.
Well, she has amazing cheekbones and what appears to be a perfect body. And...
And you have lunch on your tie.
That's funny.
You should let me know when you do the stand-up.
I will put Nina back.
Is this what it's going to be like with us the whole time?
I'm just doing what your mom asked me to.
That's it.
I'm sorry.
And in the meantime...
How hard can it be to read a book?
Shit.
♪ Look at, look at, look at ♪
♪ I can see everything ♪
♪ Babies double-dutching Singing their names ♪
♪ Counting off time doing their thing ♪
♪ Look at, look at, look at ♪
♪ I can see everything ♪
♪ Babies double-dutching Singing their names ♪
♪ Counting off time doing their thing ♪
I keep losing friends too.
I'm like the Marie Kondo of friendships...
...if Marie Kondo was the one getting thrown out.
First time?
I ran into a friend the other day, and...
It'll be fine.
She looked great. She had a baby bump.
Even if you bomb, you look amazing.
- "Didn't know you were expecting." - Like your T-shirt. It's really hot.
I'd totally bang your T-shirt.
I slept with him.
This is all the time I have. Thank you. Give it up for your host. Good night.
I'm Jackson.
- Hey. Alex. - Hey.
Our next victim...
- You want to hang later? - ...I mean guest, is first-timer...
- Not really. - ...Alex Rose. So, let's give him a hand.
Hello, everyone.
Hi.
You were probably expecting a guy when you heard the name Alex.
I get that a lot.
I mean, it wasn't easy growing up with a guy's name.
I'd come home crying after all the kids teased me,
and I'd beg my brother Joanne to beat them up.
You're not funny!
But I'd still make out with you.
Uh...
So, where were we?
So, when I was 15, I had this big crush on my brother's friend, Jeremy,
and he'd come home after school, and I'd sidle up next to him, all cool and sexy,
and I'd say, "What's up?" And he'd say...
Blow me!
What is wrong with you, bro?
This is Jackson, everyone.
He tried to hit on me backstage and said he wanted to bang my T-shirt.
Thought about it for a second,
but I really like this T-shirt.
And honestly, micropenises are so Gen X.
Really, that's all it takes? Just one dick joke?
I would've brought my entire folder. It's like this big.
Goodnight, New York.
Great. And three minutes under time. That's perfect.
- Hey. - Hey.
- What are you doing here? - Uh, you invited me.
Did I? I hope you enjoyed the train wreck.
That wasn't a train wreck. You got that... that laugh. At the end.
And you get one of these.
One down, 11 to go.
I knew I accidentally invited you for a reason.
Hi, Bean.
I would've given anything to have seen you on that stage.
Scared shitless, I bet.
Yeah.
But alive, am I right?
You were such a... a fearless kid.
What do you think happened to that?
I don't know what happened.
Life.
I think you suffered some real setbacks.
And I get it.
But I watched you gradually start to settle for what was safe and less painful.
But, honey, settling is never gonna make the fear and the pain go away.
And I can tell you that from experience.
So I want you to try something for me.
For the next week, I want you to do something every day that scares you.
One thing that makes you feel nauseous in the pit of your stomach.
That's how I felt after your dad left and I started my business.
Terrifying.
But life-changing.
- Got it? - Got it.
I will see you on the next one.
Over and out.
You know what, I don't know if I can handle doing something scary every day
on top of everything else.
I could maybe do it twice a week if I got some Xanax from my assistant.
What would you do first?
That's easy. I would go straight into old man Sullivan's office
- and ask why I'm not a full partner yet. - Mm.
It's crazy. Every time I tell myself I'm gonna do it, I literally feel sick.
It's ridiculous. I'm a grown man.
With ketchup on his tie?
Who once had ketchup on his tie.
Who's too afraid to ask for what I know I deserve.
Okay, so go into Sullivan's office tomorrow and ask for what's yours.
I mean, who cares if he's the scariest, wrinkliest old dude in New York, right?
Yeah. Yeah, right.
- Yeah, I'll do that tomorrow. - Mm.
Or maybe the next day.
What about you?
Well, that's a no-brainer.
Make peace with my dad.
We just never really connected.
And because my brothers are so damn perfect,
he always acts like I'm the screw-up.
But you're not a screw-up.
Really?
Then how come I can't get through a single chapter of Moby Dick
without falling asleep?
And I still don't have one job interview.
Oh, that reminds me.
I do pro bono work for a women's shelter on the Lower East Side.
They have a classroom--
I'm sorry, you do free work for a women's shelter?
Uh, yeah.
So modest, Bradley.
The point is they have a classroom for the high school kids that live there,
and they need a teacher to finish out the rest of the semester.
Any interest?
Maybe.
Yeah.
Why are you being so nice to me?
Do you get, like, a bonus if I actually get my inheritance?
Wow. Okay, now you've hurt my feelings.
I don't know why.
Actually, I just feel like you'd be a good fit.
Hmm.
I know what you're thinking.
What's a girl like me doing with a book like this?
You're already doing better than me. I only got to the first chapter.
Same. In high school, and then in college too.
Then the other night I was on TikTok,
feeling a record-breaking level of self-loathing, and I decided to try again.
Something just clicked, and I got into the rhythm of it,
and now I... I can't put it down.
So you're saying I should finally get myself a TikTok?
Stand clear of the closing doors, please.
Our regular teacher, Mrs. Monnell, went into labor a month early,
- so we're grateful you could fill in. - I'm grateful you asked me.
Now, the goal is to keep the kids on an even keel
and up to speed on core subjects while they're living here.
- Which could be weeks, sometimes months. - Right.
Lesson plans and files for each child.
Later you'll meet with Dr. Taylor, one of our consulting therapists.
Anything else you need, just ask.
Then I'll tell you why you probably can't have it.
Good luck.
Good morning.
I'm Miss Rose.
Hey, guys, can we just please quiet down so we can get started?
- Whoa! - Aaron!
Aaron, come on. Give me my sweater.
- Can you please give her the sweater? - It's not even funny.
Aaron, come on, man. Pink's not even your color.
- Thank you, Your Majesty. - Thanks.
Some people think Hamlet is a play about indecision.
You know, the feeling when you can't decide between Edward and Jacob,
or whoever the hot vampires are these days.
Miss Rose, you gotta update your references.
So I want everyone to write about a time
when they had something really important to do.
But like Hamlet,
you couldn't quite find a way to take action.
You have 30 minutes.
Wow, that's really beautiful.
Thank you.
But it's not the assignment we're doing, is it, Ezra?
Whatever.
You know, that's not a bad word for thinking about Hamlet.
- Why not use it as a starting point? - Maybe 'cause I don't care.
Maybe because "to be or not to be" is a stupid question.
Hmm. Maybe.
Or maybe it's the most important question.
And hey, if you don't agree with me, then maybe you can write about that.
In the meantime, I will take a deeper dive into your beautiful art.
Hey, give that back!
Absolutely, the second you're done.
Ah! Ow!
- Ezra, what do you think you're doing? - Taking action.
Oh my God.
He wouldn't do the assignment, and then he gave me the finger.
Only after you took away his prized possession.
- Right, but I didn't know that. - It was in the folder I asked you to read.
Ten minutes before class.
Alex, these children are in a very vulnerable place.
Before anything else, you have to understand that if this is gonna work.
Ms. Howard, I can teach these kids. I want to teach them. Please don't fire me.
Who's getting fired?
Nobody. Yet.
This is Alex Rose, the teacher recommended by Brad Ackerman.
And it's her first day, and it's not going particularly well.
Well, I remember your first day, Carol. Actually, I remember the whole week.
Very funny.
Maybe you can help Alex get the hang of how things work?
Yeah, I'd be delighted.
Girl with Moby Dick.
That did not come out right.
Ezra's mom died last year, and he and his aunt are here
while she sorts out a complicated family situation.
My mother died recently.
I'm so sorry.
Thank you. Uh, but I'm thinking
maybe it's something I could connect with him about.
Yeah, it's not a bad idea. It's...
I'd just wait a little bit before trying it out.
- But I-- - Kids like Ezra are a bit like cats.
- Like cats? - You have to wait for them to come to you.
Even when everything in your body
is screaming out to scratch them behind their ears.
- Patience-- - ...is a virtue.
- Right. - Yeah, the one that
I'm still getting acquainted with.
Thank you, Dr. Taylor.
Anytime, Miss Rose.
Alex.
Garrett.
Should we do the rest of these files?
Sure.
Yeah. Oh shit, I mean, I-I can't.
I... I thought we'd be done at six, and I have a dinner date to get...
With my dad. I have dinner with... with my dad.
But can we maybe try again?
Yeah, I'm here Mondays and Thursdays.
Or you can call me anytime.
Hey, Dad!
Hey.
Sorry, there was a problem on the train.
Well, always leave a little extra time, then there won't be--
...be any problems, I know.
But a life without problems would be kind of boring, wouldn't it?
Yeah. I'll take that under consideration.
Come on. How are you doing?
Good.
A women's shelter. That's... different.
But good. Good. I'm happy you're teaching again.
Thanks. Now if I could just manage not getting fired.
- Well, don't do that, Alex. Come on. - What did I do?
That self-deprecating. It's not funny or charming. You're an adult now.
Did you ever think it was funny?
- Not really. - Yeah.
But as your mother used to say, my sense of humor's a little... Hm.
You know, she really wanted us to get along better.
Not be so angry with each other.
I'm all for it. And... and I'm not angry with you.
Okay, sometimes a little frustrated.
Thing is, Dad, I'm really trying to make this new path for myself,
and I'd just like to feel that you could, you know, support me.
Lucas told me about the will. And of course, anything that you need.
No, not money.
Emotional support, Dad. Jesus.
What?
- It seems you're the angry one, not me. - I'm not angry.
Okay, fine, maybe a little.
About what?
At some basic level, I always feel like I'm letting you down.
Do you remember when I told you I was gonna quit teaching?
Yeah.
You literally told me that you weren't surprised.
- No. - Yeah.
No, I said I was disappointed.
Look, you had a few bumps along the way,
and you gave up on a career that you cared deeply about.
Like, what was I to do, lie and give you a hug?
Come on, no disrespect, but your mother had that covered.
Right, 'cause who in their right mind would hug their kid
after they've just been unfairly fired?
Also, Mom never lied to me.
Oh, come on!
Whatever, this was her idea of working things out.
- You think your mom was so damn perfect. - She was pretty awesome.
Yeah, God forbid anyone should say a word
that would knock her off her majestic pedestal, but I promise you, Alex,
she was not perfect, and she was not a saint.
Oh really? What? What did she do that was so terrible?
What, she let the dog eat your Eddie Bauer slippers?
- That's not funny. - Didn't pay her library fines?
Oh, she cheated on her taxes. No, wait, cheated on you.
Dad?
Excuse me, can I get the check, please?
Dad.
She cheated on you, that's what you're saying, isn't it?
Dad, you can't just drop a bomb like that and walk away.
I was 15 when you got divorced, is that when it happened?
Why are you running away from me? Stop!
Things happen in a marriage, Alex.
But we got through it, and we managed to have some pretty good years together,
so can we please just leave it at that?
No, we can't.
Please, I need to know.
It was before you were born.
It wasn't just a fling. Something...
Something else happened.
Oh.
Why don't we go for a walk, sweetheart?
Are you kidding me?
Let me get this straight.
You're saying that Dad...
...is not actually my father.
Mom had an affair with a musician named Johnny Alvarez.
Apparently he played at a club they'd go to in the Village.
Um, that's just...
I don't know what to say.
Johnny Alvarez?
Sounds like Mom had a type.
Lucas.
She ended the relationship when she got pregnant,
and she and Dad made this agreement not to tell me. Or any of us.
Like that was the way that they could save their marriage.
Alex, I can't imagine how difficult it must be to make sense of this.
I'm somewhere between numb and completely furious.
Like, who am I?
And why didn't anyone, namely Mom, bother to tell me?
It definitely explains a lot about me and Dad.
Why he never could love me the same as you guys.
- No. - Hey, that is not true, okay?
And he's still your father. He's the man who raised you.
I don't know.
I think I need to find him.
I'm not sure that's a good idea.
Julian, how can you say that?
Alex should know who her biological father is.
I know, but the company is a trusted family brand...
...going through... What?
It's going through a big transition right now, and if the story gets out--
The story? Are you kidding me?
Alex, we are all going to do whatever we have to do to help you with this.
Okay, that's not what I meant.
- Jesus, why am I always the bad guy? - Because you're so fucking good at it.
Julian didn't mean that.
He's just been having a really hard time lately.
With what?
Raising two wonderful children?
Being married to the perfect woman
who took the perfect job that I was apparently unfit to handle?
A hard time that his mother died.
You're not the only one missing her.
I'm here to see Brad Ackerman.
I'm Alex Rose.
Is he expecting you?
- No, but I'm sure if you-- - Alex!
- Hey! - Did we have an appointment?
I-I was just about to go shopping.
Nina's coming into town next week, and I thought it was time for a new tie.
- Because of what I said? - Yep.
You know, I always hoped, if only I could change just one person's life.
Why are you here?
Uh, I finished Moby Dick.
Thought I'd pick up my DVD, and, um,
I wanted to ask for your help with something.
Sure... I think.
The thing I keep obsessing about is why she didn't tell me.
We told each other everything.
Was she afraid or ashamed?
Did she ever give you a hint about any of it?
No, no, she never said a word.
Honestly, the whole thing seems really just unlikely.
Maybe it's a part of who she really was,
and it's one of the reasons she sent me on this crazy "Alex in Wonderland" journey
to find out for myself.
- No, way too boring. - What?
Make an effort here, Bradley.
So...
Will you help me find Johnny Alvarez?
Yeah, yeah, of course. We could start by googling him.
Wow, you really do think of everything.
Okay, smarty-pants, what did you come up with?
A bandleader named Johnny Alvarez, except he was born in 1918.
Uh, I tried John, Juan, Jonathan...
There's, like, a thousand entries.
Perfect... for your middle school graduation.
Come on, this is the amazing Tina we're talking about.
Nina, actually.
Um, there is someone that I use on divorce cases, but she's not cheap.
- If the money's a problem, I can talk-- - No, it's not the money. It's...
It's like I've fallen down this weird rabbit hole.
Old family secrets, private detectives,
becoming friends with a lawyer.
Nothing makes sense anymore.
So we're friends now?
Looks good.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
Now all you need is a suit to go with it.
I was actually just--
Shh.
- Get a new suit. - Yeah.
Hiya, Bean.
You like my new tripod stick thingy I got for the camera?
It's not bad, just a little shaky.
Our chair.
Hmm. Needs a little love.
Well, I'll have to get that taken care of before I...
Before I... Why is it so hard to say "die"?
I'm gonna die.
How does that line go?
"What dreams may come when we shuffle off the mortal coil must..."
- "...must give us pause." - "...give us pause."
"...must give us pause." Ah, that's got a nice ring to it.
Like I could stick around, but in some cool dream state
without pain or suffering.
Speaking of suffering, how friggin' long is this book?
I just kept looking for some sort of inspiring connection
between the book and the list.
But the best I could come up with was,
I'm Ahab, you're my whale,
and I've set you off on this hopeless quest.
I mean, I got a lot of nerve.
- No, Mom, you have-- - Right?
What am I doing? Playing God?
As if I'm some kind of paragon of...
wisdom and virtue, which I can assure you, my darling, that I am not.
Yeah, so, um,
Dad told me.
The truth is, I...
I...
Truth is, I woke up this morning, and I was convinced
that I should release you from this lunatic mission.
But then I looked at the list again,
and I'm telling you, I know you were only 13 when you wrote it...
but it is a map
toward your best self. You know what I mean?
I just... I wanna say, if you're struggling, or if you're feeling like a failure,
it's okay.
There's no shame in asking for help.
I'm learning that now more and more every day.
"Call me Ishmael."
One of the best first lines ever.
Yeah.
Remember how I used to say, "Call me Mommy."
"But just be sure to call."
All right, my Bean.
Till next time.
I love ya. Over and out.
I remember you were a very talented student.
You had a lot of heart, but maybe not so much discipline.
Hmm. I wanted to play Green Day and Fiona Apple,
and you made me do scales and Bach.
So why "Clair de Lune"?
It was my mom's favorite.
Your mother was a special lady.
And I was sad to hear about her passing.
I know you don't take on many students, Ms. Wyman,
but it would have meant so much to her if she knew I was doing this with you.
All right, three conditions.
- You arrive on time... - Mm.
...you practice every day, including scales,
and you perform in the June recital.
So I was at the library, and I... I saw some books I thought would interest you.
So now you're trying to buy my respect?
More like loan it.
They have to be back in two weeks.
I know you're interested in art, so, um, I found a couple of books,
including this amazing biography of Egon Schiele.
- He's this-- - I know who he was.
Oh, and this DVD.
It's based in New York, present day.
It's about 90 minutes, and the actor who plays Hamlet is, like, really hot,
so maybe give it a shot.
Hey, Miss Rose!
Yeah.
Okay, so I didn't pretend that Ezra was a cat, and yes, it totally backfired...
Yeah, truly.
You look nice.
No, no, no, that's fine. Just say hi to Theo from me. Okay, bye.
- Hi. - Sorry.
- You were saying? - I didn't pretend Ezra was a cat.
No, no, after that.
Oh. Uh, I think I said, you look nice.
That was it. Thank you. You look--
Wet, angry, and frustrated. I need your help.
You never called me.
I know, I meant to.
But then all this messed up family stuff happened--
That's a coincidence.
Messed-up family stuff is my speciality, and I really would love to help.
It's just, I'm late for a meeting and I have this thing later, hence,
monkey suit.
Hey, why don't you come with me?
My date canceled,
and we can talk about Ezra or anything you want to talk about.
Oh, I don't know.
I'm not really the kind of person you want to take to a fancy event.
Says who?
- This is fantastic. - Pretty great, isn't it?
Holy shit, is that Patrick Ewing?
Wait, you're into basketball?
I was the point guard at the Ditmas Park Middle School team.
I loved the Knicks, and I need to talk to him.
It's kind of a long story.
Which I will tell you if you're very good.
Well, if you're very good, I might just introduce you to him.
You know him?
I'm just gonna check my coat. I'll be right back.
Patrick Ewing.
- Yeah. Thank you. - You're welcome.
Aren't you supposed to wear a tux?
Aren't you supposed to be wearing a fancy gown?
Oh, don't be so gender normative.
At least you got yourself a nice tie. You look damn good, counselor.
He does, doesn't he?
Alex, this is Nina Keller.
- Ah! - Nina, this is my client, Alex Rose.
It's so nice to meet you, Nina. I've heard so much about you.
Yeah, you too. I think you may be Brad's favorite client.
Nina just got offered a job
heading the Mayor's Sustained Manhattan Initiative.
- Wow. - Looks like she's moving back to New York.
"Just when I thought I was out, they pulled me back in."
Well, congrats.
What are you doing here? This is the last place I'd think to find you.
She's with me.
Hey.
Garrett.
- Nina. - Dr. Taylor.
- You know each other. - ...know each other.
That makes perfect sense. Garrett knows everyone.
And I thought I was special.
And you are special. Nina and I had a disastrous date a long time ago.
It's impossible to have two alphas in a relationship.
Someone always has to be the beta.
I guess that's where I come in.
Oh, that's not what I meant. You have all the alpha a girl needs.
Oh, did you hear that? I have all of the alpha...
Cheers to your alpha.
- To Brad's alpha. - Cheers.
- Wow. That's... Cheers. - I love this so much.
I will have, uh, the 16-year-old scotch. Thank you.
it's quite the turnout we got here.
Hey, yeah. Yeah, we did good, right?
Partly thanks to you persuading the firm to buy, what, three tables?
Yeah, it was a bit cheaper than making me partner, so...
So, you and Nina?
Yeah. So, you and Alex.
Oh, she was kind enough to step in last minute.
Yeah, no, that makes sense. She doesn't seem like your usual type.
What's my usual type?
- Oh, I don't know. Someone a little less... - Tips in the rebound for the win!
And then the crowd goes nuts.
...whatever that is.
Whoa! And it was just epic.
Exactly. The thing I didn't know I was missing.
The best Knick ever!
You know, I can't believe you got Patrick Ewing's email.
I think he was just trying to get rid of me.
No.
You totally charmed him.
Like you totally charmed me.
You know, I really like talking to you.
And I really like listening to you talk.
Well, I really like talking to you too.
And listening.
And sometimes,
I like to look really deep into your eyes.
Are we having a staring competition?
Wow.
Well, don't let me distract you, 'cause I'm determined to win fair and square, but
how about a proper date?
Well, what about the fact that we--
Work together?
Technically, I'm a mere consultant.
There's nothing mere about you.
I've been wanting to do that ever since I saw you on the A Train.
So, how about that date?
What do you think we've been doing all night?
Oh, okay.
So, Lucas is my bud, always has been.
His wife is Zoe, and we became best friends the minute they started dating.
And, uh, Julian is the number one son and teaches law at Columbia.
Wow, I'm impressed.
Yeah, so is he.
Shit, I really didn't want to be late today.
Look, we're not late.
You don't have anything to prove to your brothers or your dad or anyone.
Thank you.
- Sorry. I'm... - If he says lecture...
- Garrett's a hit. - It's fascinating.
Yeah.
Can I say something?
You look different. In a really good way.
I feel different.
I mean, Garrett has something to do with it, but...
- It's also this life list thing. - Yeah?
Yeah. Who knows if I'll do it all, but
I don't know, I wonder if that's even the point, you know?
What about make peace with Dad?
I think he just wants to find a way forward.
I know, I know, but...
I need to find out about Johnny first, and we haven't had any luck finding him, so...
- Hi, guys, your table is ready. - Come on up.
Speaking of the list,
you will never in a million years believe what I'm doing tomorrow.
That was a wonderful, original interpretation.
Next up, Alexandra Rose, playing "Clair de Lune."
Excuse me. Sorry.
Remember the summer when you and your brothers
did the combination car wash and lemonade stand,
and your brothers just assumed the money would go to their video game fund...
Education is an important part of how we support our families while they live here.
But you hung these everywhere
until they finally had to relent,
and all the money went to the Humane Society.
Oh, you're the one?
- It's me. - It's you?
- It's you and me. - Oh my goodness.
- Ready? - I'm ready for you, girl!
What you got, hotshot?
Yeah!
Oh my God! Are you okay?
I thought I said mosh pits were out of the question.
- Yeah! - Yeah!
Just don't go anywhere near a tattoo parlor or any vehicle whatsoever.
I'm trying.
- I know you're trying, but... - Got it?
I want you to write a letter from you to yourself.
So here we are. Be a great teacher.
I watched that movie that you gave me.
I always knew you were.
And if you are actually watching this right now...
Alex, I'm so proud of you.
- Hi. - Hey.
Alex?
Alex!
- Hey! - Dad.
What are you doing in this neck of the woods?
I was just getting coffee with a... a work friend.
How about you?
I just had a meeting nearby. I'm kind of waiting for my Uber now.
I'm sorry I haven't been in touch.
No, I-I understand.
I mean, I think I understand.
I just need a little more time.
I know.
It's good to see you.
Hey, sorry I'm late.
You're not. I'm early. Uh," Clair de Lune."
Nine down, three to go.
Jinx.
I want to put the detective back on.
I know, I know you're gonna say she hit a dead end and that it's a lot of money--
I already did it.
I know, you can pay me back later or not.
You could just keep being my stylist. Um...
The point is, we have to find Johnny, right?
Thanks.
Yeah, of course.
Ooh, sandwiches.
So how are things with Garrett?
Good. Really good.
Okay.
Why are you looking at me like that?
It's probably nothing, it's just...
Do you think it's strange he never wants to stay at my place?
Like, he always picks the movie or the restaurant.
I don't know, it's kind of like we live entirely in his world
and only occasionally will he visit mine.
Yep.
What?
It doesn't sound like nothing, right?
Like, how do you really know someone unless you've seen their bookshelves
or, like, the crazy shit they keep in their fridge?
How come every time we talk about Garrett, you get all weird?
I thought you guys were friends.
We are friends. Of a certain kind.
The kind that don't really like each other?
The point is that you should talk to him about it before it festers.
Okay.
Sakina grew up here but works in Mumbai doing microfinancing,
and Russell is the president of the Psychiatric Institute.
Hey, can I ask you a favor?
- Uh-huh. - Can we not talk about the list tonight?
Why? Everyone loves that story.
It's not a story, it's my life,
and I'm starting to feel like a favorite pet trick.
Yeah, no, of course, sure. No life list.
Are you okay?
Yeah.
Alex?
It's nothing, it's just...
How come we never stay at my place?
Like, make dinner at my place.
Because you love my apartment.
I do, it's amazing, it's just...
It's yours.
It's your life and your friends and...
I don't know, I thought maybe you'd want to be a bigger part of my life too.
Yeah, yeah, and we've hung out with your family. We--
We had brunch once.
You always say that I should work harder at unraveling my feelings, so...
Here they are, unraveled.
Thank you, and I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, you're right, I'm just...
I'm a really bad guest 'cause I'm a bit of a control freak.
I'm a lot of a control freak.
Maybe you should see a shrink.
Well, maybe I should just stay at your place.
Really?
Really.
Oh, just give me one second.
Hello, Bradley.
Yeah, what's up?
Oh my God.
- Baby? - They found my dad!
They found Johnny.
He lives in Vermont, and he's still a musician, just under a different name.
- Which is why we couldn't find him. - Incredible.
Your father was missing?
No. Yes.
It's kind of a long story, which I guess now I have to tell you.
Which is fine because I didn't get a chance to read your New Yorker article,
and Garrett says that we can't talk about Meghan Markle.
Hi, I'm Alex.
- Hi. - Hi.
Hi.
So, what have you decided?
Uh, well, Garrett and I are driving up to Burlington tomorrow.
I'm gonna show up at the club where Johnny's band plays and see what happens.
Are you sure that's not, like, too in his face?
Maybe, but if I call him out of the blue and he blows me off,
I don't know if I can handle that, you know?
I gotta go. My first dinner guest has arrived.
- I'll keep you posted. - Good luck.
Thanks. Coming!
- Ta-da! Hey! - Hey!
- How are you? - Mwah. Come on in.
Place looks fantastic with all the new furniture. It feels so...
Small?
It feels so you. So adorable.
You're sweet.
Okay, let me take this to the kitchen and I'll go get changed.
Make yourself at home, okay?
Thank you. Yeah.
Oh, don't sit in the armchair. I have to get the springs fixed.
Okay.
Can you get that, please?
Hi.
Wow. You're even hotter than Alex said.
- I'm Megan. - I'm--
Garrett, duh. This is my girlfriend, Nell. Alex, we're here.
Be right there.
Hey. What's up?
- Hi. - Wow, this place is tiny.
I wonder what she's paying.
Oh. My. God.
Alex, you got a tattoo?
- Is that the... Yeah. - The list!
I can't believe how much she's already done.
Oh, except that one still isn't crossed off.
Get with the program, Garrett. She's only got till New Year's.
I got it.
Love her, she's getting the door in somebody else's house.
Hello.
- Hi. I'm Zoe. - Hey.
- Nell. Nice to meet you. - Oh, I've heard so much about you.
Lucas. Nice to meet you.
Okay, wait. Shh. I have a good one. I have a good one.
Would you rather time travel 100 years into the past or the future?
The future, obviously.
I'm thinking jet packs, cure for cancer, and we'll live forever.
That's all well and good, but at the end of the day...
Who wants to live forever? I mean, most weeks I can barely make it to Friday.
- Or Wednesday. - Yeah. Exactly.
- I'm serious. - I want to live in the present.
- Have you read The Power of Now? - My God.
Of course.
My ick is to ask somebody to Venmo you. Like, I'm not...
- Oh my God! It's so uncomfortable. - Don't do it.
You're thinking about this too hard. What's your ick?
You're putting a lot of... Cilantro.
What? That's how I find out you don't like cilantro?
Sandals with socks. Sorry, Grandpa.
- So problematic. - What's the point of this?
What? Oh, it's like a thing... I'll explain later. You guys, I can't...
No, I need to know what hers is, because she has a million.
I do have a question for Garrett.
And no judging.
Have you ever had an affair with one of your patients?
Seriously?
Why, Megan? Have you ever slept with one of your doctors?
Does my dermatologist count?
Huzzah!
- Huzzah! - Huzzah!
♪ Have you ever slept with One of your doctors? ♪
Is that really how I come across? Like some kind of creep
who would sleep with his own patient?
No, it was just a game. We were just having a good time.
Admit it, it was a fun night.
Yep, maybe not for everyone.
Can I ask you, when you organized this dinner,
did you put any thought whatsoever
into bringing together a group of people who had something, anything in common?
You mean besides me? Because I was kind of hoping that would cover it.
Hey.
I'm sorry if you were feeling left out and I didn't... I didn't clock it.
I was just really excited for you to spend some time with my friends.
Having inane conversation about absolutely nothing.
Do you know what your friend Megan told me?
She said I'd better get my shit together so you can check true love off your list.
- She did not. - Yeah, I dunno what was more insulting,
the fact that you hadn't checked it off, or that in some unconscious way
you're only with me to get your inheritance.
I'm going to give you a moment to reconsider what you just said.
I don't give a shit about the money, Garrett. Is that what you think of me?
I honestly don't know what to think
about tonight, or about where we are in our relationship.
We're in my apartment for the first time since the week I moved in,
with my ridiculous friends who say inane things.
Well, maybe I should go.
Sounds like a plan.
See you later.
Garrett, wait. How am I supposed to get to Vermont?
- Pringle? - Yes.
Thank you.
You okay?
Yeah.
No.
He won't answer any of my calls or texts, which is just great.
You guys are amazing for doing this. I really appreciate it.
It's an adventure.
If I was meeting my father for the first time, I'd want some backup.
What?
I'm trying to put on some weight.
I'm getting way too good-looking.
People are starting to think I'm superficial.
You see? She never laughs at my jokes.
- You told her that? - Because you don't.
Maybe I was laughing on the inside. I don't know.
Well, laugh louder on the inside.
Oh my God.
- No way. - She laughed.
- Let's go. - What?
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Hm.
Hey, can we listen to something else?
Yeah, sure.
♪ They call me Stacey They call me Her ♪
♪ They call me Jane ♪
♪ That's not my name ♪
♪ They call me quiet ♪
♪ But I'm a riot ♪
♪ Mary-Jo-Lisa ♪
♪ Always the same ♪
♪ That's not my name ♪
- Hey. - Hmm.
What if my dad doesn't like me?
What if you don't like him?
Is that you being reassuring?
What if he doesn't like me and I don't like him? I already have one of those.
God, Nina's so beautiful.
She has a neck like Audrey Hepburn.
You should check out her ears.
- Really? - I'm serious, yeah.
Wow!
It's like a golden orb designed by a sun god.
And her skin.
Yeah.
Is the sex amazing?
I mean, even if it wasn't, I'd be so impressed with myself,
I would just feel like it was amazing.
Hm.
Just so you know, I can hear every word you're saying.
The only annoying thing about her is that she talks in her sleep.
Mm.
We are checking in for Alexandra Rose.
- And Bradley Ackerman. - Bradley Ackerman.
The Acker Man?
- Is there a movie star... - No.
Come on.
- Thank you, that's fine. - Okay.
Is there a Bradley Ackerman?
No. That's something my dad used to say all the time.
Next undiscovered...
Oh.
- We're getting upgraded. - Of course.
Hey! They're upgrading us to a suite.
Great.
- Yes, perfect. - Okay, cool. Thank you.
Perfect.
Hello.
Hey, you ready?
Yep.
Where's Nina?
Oh, uh, she had a work emergency.
Luckily she was able to get a flight back to New York.
You good?
How do I look? Is this...
You look great.
Yeah?
Thanks.
And for being here.
Here we go.
This is gonna be great.
Yeah.
It's gonna be great.
Let's just go. This is... This is a terrible idea.
Hey, wait. Just, hey.
Look at me.
Take a breath.
Now, just go over there and talk to him. Remember, I am right here.
Okay.
Oh shit.
Hey.
Do you have a cell phone?
Uh, yeah.
Yeah? Hand it over.
What?
I want to take a selfie.
It will last way longer than you two staring a hole through my head.
I'm sorry, we--
Are you from the revenue?
It's... Uh... We're not from the IRS.
Actually, my name is Brad, and this is Alex.
Alexandra, actually.
Rose.
Hi.
Alexandra.
Surprise.
Alexandra Carolina Rose.
You know my full name.
Of course. I wrote a song when you were born.
It was called Una Rosa Con El Nombre De Otra.
A sad love song.
About Elizabeth and you.
Did you ever record that?
No. No, no. It was just a way of dealing with life in the moment.
So, I'm curious, what kind of music do you like?
All kinds.
Lately, I've been listening to this Mexican singer I really like,
Natalia Lafourcade.
Uh-huh.
Oh, and I've been taking piano lessons for a while now.
It's a lot of work to get good at an instrument.
Or anything.
Yeah. Life, for instance.
To the memory of your beautiful mother.
Cheers.
Can I ask you something?
Were you ever curious about me?
Of course.
I played a gig in New York a long time ago.
And while we were in town, I...
I drove out to Brooklyn and I parked my car in front of your house.
I saw your brothers coming back from school
and Sam honking his horn as he pulled into the driveway.
And then the front door opens and...
a little girl comes out to greet her dad.
No, I don't think I ever did that.
He swings you round and round, and then the two of you go back into the house.
No, that...
That's just not something that Samuel would do with me.
Maybe because the fact is he isn't my real father.
You are.
There are facts, and there's what's true.
And a person needs to make room for both.
What's his name?
- Brad. - Brad.
Brad seems like a cool guy. Is he your... your boyfriend?
- No. - No?
No, he's, um...
He's just a really great friend.
- Hey, Johnny. - Yeah?
You ready?
Yeah. Back to work.
Right, yeah. Of course.
Um...
Can we maybe talk some more after the set?
Uh, that's going to be tricky, but we can meet tomorrow morning if you want.
- Where are you staying? - At the Marriott on Cherry.
Uh-huh. Yeah, they make a pretty good corned beef hash there, yeah.
Ten in the morning.
That would be wonderful.
I'll see you in the morning.
Bye, Alexandra.
Hey. How'd it go?
I mean, it was awkward, but at the same time, it felt so... real.
- Yeah. - Intimate.
I don't know.
And he has this really cool way of saying things like,
"There's facts, and there's what's true."
What about when he asked if we were from "the revenue"?
- Yeah. - He's such a man's man.
I know!
By the way, he asked if you're my boyfriend.
- No way. - Yeah.
I think he liked you.
So what you're saying is you're moving to Vermont.
Mm-hmm. I mean, why not? It's beautiful.
- Okay. - And there's cows, and I love cows.
And there's ice cream. And my dad lives here.
No, you're a city girl.
You milking cows? Are you kidding? That's not--
I wouldn't be milking the cows. Are you nuts?
There's the facts, and then there's the truth.
No. No, he said there is facts, and then there's what's true.
What's true?
Okay. Fact, this is a glass.
- Uh-huh. - Truth...
We need another drink.
- We already played three by Sinéad. - We have to play Sinéad.
- Just have some variety in our evening... - No. No.
You just pressed every single button.
Now we have no--
Yo! What? You pressed random numbers!
♪ They call me hell They call me Stacey ♪
♪ They call me Her They call me Jane ♪
♪ That's not my name That's not my name ♪
♪ That's not my name ♪
I can't believe our song came on.
Your shushing was louder than you were talking.
Oh.
Oh, come on.
This is my room.
Sorry.
Good night.
- Good night. - Good night.
Yep.
Jinx.
- This is crazy. - Should we stop?
No.
You're a really good kisser.
Thanks. You too.
Maybe just a little less tongue. Just tickles a little.
Yeah, okay.
Sorry, I just have a big tongue, and it's really drunk.
It's okay.
- You know what they say about big tongues. - What?
Bradley Ackerman.
Yeah?
Come here.
Hey.
Part of me knew he wasn't coming.
Yeah.
But I'm not gonna cry.
Well, you can if you want to.
The truth is I'm an idiot.
Expecting a total stranger to make everything right in my life.
Thank you for coming.
You always talk like there's something wrong with you.
It's bullshit.
You're so smart and beautiful and full of life and...
Every time I see you, you dazzle me.
And if Garrett and your dad are too blind to see it, then it is their loss,
but it does not have to be ours.
Except it does.
Last night was wonderful.
But it was a mistake.
- You have this amazing girlfriend-- - Nina didn't go back because of work.
We got in a fight and broke up.
What was the fight about?
You.
Okay. Why didn't you tell me this before you got into bed with me?
I know I should have.
- Yeah. - Everything just happened so fast, and...
Ugh...
Yeah.
Sorry.
Don't go. Please, Alex.
Look, Garrett is an amazing guy.
I get it. He's...
sophisticated and accomplished, and he... I...
I don't believe you love him.
I don't even really think you like him.
- You like how you feel about yourself... - You need to stop talking.
- When you're with him. - Wow.
You need validation even after everything you've done...
- You're full of shit. - ...since your mom died.
Telling me what I want and how to live my life.
Right, 'cause that would be Garrett's job.
Wow.
It's okay.
The other night wasn't about the list.
I was just freaking out about the broken armchair, and your friends were...
And the book I gave you that you didn't read.
But then...
I have just spent the whole weekend missing you.
I spent the whole weekend missing your smile
and missing all your goofy stuff.
And I realized that we can do this. That I can do this.
You didn't ask me how it went with Johnny.
I'm so- I'm sorry. How... How did it go?
Not great.
The thing is,
my messy place, my friends, the books I read...
They're me, Garrett.
They're all me.
Hey.
Shall we?
Yeah.
I don't understand why Lucas wants us to meet with a broker.
We can't put the house on the market until the new year.
If you don't mind me asking, how are you?
Good. How are you? How are the kids?
They miss you.
Yeah, me too.
When is Lucas getting here? I have stuff to do.
I'm here! Hey!
Hi, what's up?
- Where's the broker? - Broker's not coming.
What?
Yeah, I've got something I want to show you.
Just, it's gonna be all right, just...
Whoa, what? I don't understand.
Camping out under a full moon.
Number seven on the list.
Bingo.
- This is sweet but... - No, Chloe--
Guys, just stop. Just shut up.
Both of you shut up, okay?
We are gonna do this so, uh...
Let's crack open the wine, get started.
Yeah?
Yeah.
So I got there at 10, and
half an hour went by, and then an hour.
And Johnny never showed up, and you're just sitting there waiting.
Must've been so tough, Alex.
I'm sorry.
I wasn't totally surprised.
I liked him.
But even though he told me stuff, it kind of felt like he was
- holding something back, you know? - Mm-hmm.
Have you called Dad? Since you-you got back?
I mean, I-I get it. You're not... You're not ready, but...
All he does is ask about you.
Remember when you said that finding out about Johnny
explained a lot about your relationship with Dad?
I felt the same way.
Except for me, it was you and Mom.
Your bond.
Your little secrets and your private jokes.
Like a club the rest of us weren't allowed into.
Maybe for a moment think about what that was like for Dad.
For Lucas and me.
Is that how you felt?
Wow.
I had...
I had no idea.
I think I need another drink.
Ah.
I just remembered something.
- Uh... - Julian, what are we doing up here?
Uh... Oh yeah.
It's over here.
When's the last time we were all up here together?
Ages.
Incredible.
It's still here.
Oh my God, dude. What?
Julian, you little devil. This whole time you never said anything?
Look, even anal brainiacs need to unwind sometimes. Okay?
Think it's any good?
It's been here for, like, 15 years.
Well, there's only one way to find out.
So, Julian came up here for his secret stash.
What about you, Lucas? What shenanigans did you get up to?
I-I lost my virginity
in that corner, on that mattress,
with Valerie Hoffman.
- Wow! - Valerie Hoffman?
Yes.
Dude, she was so out of your league.
Dude, I know.
Uh...
- I don't know, it was a one-time thing. - I bet.
It was like, all I remember
is hearing Oprah on the TV downstairs the whole time.
What about you, little sister?
Any secrets we should know about?
I used to have these really elaborate sleepovers with my friends.
And there was one night that we each wrote down
all the things that we wanted to accomplish in life.
Like, the list?
Yeah.
Wow.
And here we are.
Alex?
Yeah?
What are they like?
The DVDs Mom left you.
- Ready? - Yes.
Remember the summer when you and your brothers
did the combination car wash and lemonade stand,
and your brothers assumed that the money would go to their video game fund,
but you hung these everywhere...
...until they finally had to relent,
and all the money went to the Humane Society.
What? I thought I said mosh pits were out of the question.
Fine.
Just don't go anywhere near a tattoo parlor or any vehicle whatsoever.
I want you to live your best life.
You have to get yourself out of this hole that you're in.
I'm not gonna be around to dig you out, but I can sure as hell leave you a shovel.
Do you remember the cottage we rented upstate?
And at night, we would all go sit out on the porch together
and just look at the moon and the stars.
And it seemed like the only time that we didn't have to talk or tease or argue.
And sometimes you'd curl up in your father's lap,
and it was just quiet.
Just a moment to experience that sense of wonder
and reflect and be grateful for all that we have.
And most of all, for each other.
Hi.
Hey, Dad.
So happy to see you.
I would pull up in the driveway, home from work...
...run out of the house, and I'd pick you up and spin you around.
Mr. Sullivan!
Alexandra. Wonderful to see you.
Even if you don't exactly seem thrilled to see me.
Sorry, it's just, I thought Mr. Ackerman would be here.
Bradley sends his regrets.
Now that he's a full partner, his schedule is more complicated.
I'm sorry. Did you say he's a partner?
He marched into my office and gave me an ultimatum.
I couldn't decide whether to rap him on the knuckles
or ask what took him so long.
I assume that's for him.
Oh. It's nothing. It's just a tie.
- Mm. - And a bib, just a little joke between us.
I'll make sure he gets it.
So, when Elizabeth proposed this little scheme,
I told her she was off her rocker.
That's when we agreed it'd be wise to have someone like Bradley
handle the particulars.
In any case, I hope you haven't suffered too much this last year.
I had my moments. But, um...
I guess that was partly the point.
The thing is, Mr. Sullivan, um...
I didn't finish the list.
Seems true love continues to elude me.
True love is a bitch.
Ask any of my ex-wives.
Is there like a consolation prize?
A week at Club Med?
- I'm afraid not. - Yeah.
Just this.
Your mother didn't think it was fair
to expect you to find true love with a ticking clock.
And I quote, "I just hope she won't settle for less."
Your inheritance, my dear.
The house?
Her wish from the start.
Why we had to go through the theatrics...
There's a small trust
to help cover taxes and maintenance, and if you're not ready to move in,
you can rent it out until you are.
Entirely up to you.
Oh dear. You're crying.
I'm not good at crying.
Let me get my assistant.
Okay.
Alex, my darling.
Mom.
Here we are. You did it.
Barely.
I never doubted you.
I want to say that being your mom
has been the joy of my life.
And now you're at a new beginning.
And I will not be haunting you anymore. No more lists and ultimatums.
You got this.
So there may be just one more thing.
Life is beautiful and messy and complicated,
and sometimes it doesn't look the way you think it's supposed to look,
and that is okay.
Keep going and always be brave.
I will.
And as for true love,
I'll admit I never really figured that one out.
But I do know this.
Love is worth fighting for.
Understood?
- Hey, Mom. - Hi!
I made you some tea.
Oh honey. Thank you.
Of course.
- What are you doing with that? - I am doing a little project.
You'll see.
I love you so much, Bean. Forever and always.
Don't forget it.
I love you too, Mom.
Bye.
Oh shit!
♪ Are you callin' me bird?♪
Zoe, what are the four true love questions?
♪ They call me hell ♪
Shit.
♪ They call me-- ♪
What are you doing?
What does it look like I'm doing?
Why didn't you answer any of my calls? I was trying to apologize to you.
Okay, well, apology accepted,
and I'm sorry too, but you didn't have to hit my car.
- Can we go inside? Please, I need to talk. - I don't think that's a good idea.
- But-- - I really don't think it's a good idea
with everything that's happened between us. I'm sorry, but
making up and being friends again?
It's not gonna happen.
But I didn't say that I wanted us to be friends.
Okay, that settles that.
Goodnight.
I want us to be more.
Like, a lot more.
You didn't the last time I saw you.
Maybe I did, but I was just too confused to know,
and maybe I just needed to ask myself a few important questions.
Um, four, to be exact.
You wrote them down?
"One. Is he kind?" Meaning you.
No question. You're like a puppy dog.
You might as well be a Labrador Retriever.
I had a lab when I was a kid.
"Two, can I tell him everything in my heart?"
Well, duh.
I've been telling you everything pretty much uncensored since the day we met.
"Three. Does he help me become the best version of myself?"
Well, that's a no-brainer.
I mean, do you think that there's any chance that
I would have gotten through the last year without you?
Done any of it...
without you?
And the fourth one?
Oh. Um...
Doesn't matter.
The important thing is the answer is yes, so there.
Four for four.
So what happens now?
Wow.
It's true what they say.
Senior partners really do kiss better.
- We do everything better. - Everything?
Five, four,
three, two, one. Happy New Year!
Happy New Year, Bradley Ackerman.
Who would've thought?
Happy New Year.
Cheers. Love of your life?
Don't embarrass me.
Happy New Year, Zoe.
Happy New Year, my love.
Love you.
Ezra.
- Miss Rose. - Happy New Year.
Happy New Year.
Parsons, this one.
- No way! - Can you believe it?
- Yeah. - You didn't tell me that part.
- Yeah. - That's amazing!
Hi, Kelly. Happy New Year. How's the baby?
Oh, big.
Hi, Dad.
- Happy New Year. - Happy New Year, sweetheart.
- I'm really happy you're here. - Good to be here.
Oh God, Ms. Howard and Dad.
- Keeping an eye on you. - No plotting against me.
Oh, we will. You're toast, you're done.
- That's not a thing. - ...your point. You're done.
- Giving you a hard time? - They're inventing...
You didn't tell me that your ex-boyfriend made American Zombie: Blood Apocalypse.
- That game is so unoriginal and boring. - Good save.
That's what it felt like after playing it for 36 hours.
Okay. Hey, everyone.
Hey, gather around, you beautiful revelers. Come on, come inside.
I wanted to make a toast. Um...
It is so incredible to be in this house,
this house that Lucas and Alex and I grew up in.
As you all know, this wasn't the easiest year.
It tested us.
So thank you to old friends,
to new friends, and finally, to our lovely dear mother.
Happy New Year!
Cheers.
♪ Our house Is a very, very, very fine house ♪
♪ With two cats in the yard ♪
♪ Life used to be so hard ♪
♪ Now everything is easy... ♪
Cheers.
♪ And now ♪
♪ Come to me now ♪
♪ And rest your head For just five minutes ♪
♪ Everything is done ♪
♪ Such a cozy room ♪
♪ The windows are illuminated ♪
♪ By the evening sunshine through them ♪
♪ Fiery gems for you ♪
♪ And only for you ♪
♪ Our house Is a very, very, very fine house ♪
♪ With two cats in the yard ♪
♪ Life used to be so hard ♪
♪ Now everything is easy 'cause of you ♪
♪ And now ♪
♪ I'll light the fire ♪
♪ You place the flowers In the vase that you bought ♪
♪ Today ♪