[Wess] If nobody wants me, then nobody can hurt me.
[woman 1] Somewhere in me is this little glimmer of hope.
I just want to be a normal person.
[exhaling heavily]
[man] You can't do it and then I just get mad.
[woman 2] If I don't make a change now,
I'm scared it's gonna be too late.
[groaning]
It hurts.
[woman 3] I refuse to stop fighting.
I have to do this for my children.
You've part of this system that fundamentally
refuses to acknowledge core parts of your existence.
[Wess] My first thought waking up every morning usually is,
"Thank you for letting me wake up the next day."
Every day you wake up is a blessing,
especially at my size.
I am very grateful that I'm as mobile as I am.
But I'm scared that it's getting to be less and less.
[groans]
Over the last few months, my walking ability
has decreased more and more.
And that scares me.
'Cause I never wanna be bedbound.
Because of my lymphedema, I have to keep my legs
elevated as much as possible.
And so I spend most of my time in my adjustable bed.
The last time my doctor examined it,
he told me just on its own, the mass weighs 40 pounds.
So when I walk, it gets in the way.
And I can only move at a glacial pace.
Have you ever seen a penguin walk where they...
They walk side to side.
That's what I feel like when I walk.
On a good day, I can walk maybe 50 feet
and then I have to rest.
On a bad day, just the physical act
of carrying all the weight on my stomach
while my lymphedema is tugging me down,
creates a pain that is so intense,
I wanna pass out.
I remember growing up, we always saw those
commercials of those old people that are like,
"Help, I've fallen. I can't get up."
And you always laugh at it.
You think, "Oh, ha-ha, how funny."
Now let me tell you, at this size, I have fallen
and I have fallen where I couldn't get up right away,
and the first thing that runs through your mind is,
"Oh, my God. I'm gonna die."
I make sure that my front door is unlocked
so that if I fell in the bathtub
while I was taking a shower,
I could scream loud enough for my phone to dial 911.
And then 911 could come over because my door
was unlocked and they could get me up.
Because when the water's running and it's soapy,
even the smallest movement poses a risk that I could slip.
Because sometimes my lymphedema
can pull me backwards and throw me off balance,
and I've got a lot of body folds to move and to clean.
And so I've gotta hold the stomach up
and I've gotta get in there
and clean under all the crevices
and all the nooks and crannies.
After a few minutes of bending and balancing,
my breath gets really shallow,
and then my legs start to shake,
and so it's a very difficult process.
But it has to be done.
[breathing heavily]
[sighs in relief]
After I get out of the shower, I just kinda like to air dry.
So, also then I'll... I'll, like, towel dry my hair,
my arms, and like, my regular, like, body.
And then I got a little fan that really helps me
to dry the places that I can't reach with the towel.
But, mainly I'll just kinda sit
and think about what I'll order for breakfast.
And oh my, the thought of eating,
especially the first time in the morning,
is so exhilarating.
I don't love the way my body looks,
it's hard to deal with everybody scrutinizing me.
So I'm grateful I can always rely
on ordering through the app on my phone.
One of the perks of living by yourself
is being able to eat breakfast naked.
I don't enjoy clothes 'cause clothes can be quite restrictive,
especially at this size, there's not very many clothes for you.
So, I wear clothes when I leave the house obviously,
but when I'm home, I do what I need to do to be comfortable.
There's never a limit to how many breakfast burritos
I can eat after my morning shower
It's like I like to eat them so much,
that when I'm chewing,
I cram it in and I get this high off of it.
And I just like...
it's like float... I don't know how to describe it,
it's like floating in the sky.
Growing up, my parents didn't have a lot of money
but my dad did love to cook good food.
And the portions that he served my sister and I
were generous to say the least.
My idea of what a portion was growing up is
way jacked up.
And I grew up associating
large meals with my father's love.
Outside of eating, my childhood was all doom and gloom.
My parents divorced when I was three.
And my dad got custody because my mother
is an alcoholic.
He was an over the road truck driver so he was gone a lot.
So my older sister... I'm six years old,
my sister's 13, 14.
And she really stepped in when I was growing up.
She's seven years older than I am.
We're so spaced out in age
that it almost feels like I'm a single kid somewhat.
And so I was home a lot by myself.
That's when a family member
was very sexually abusive towards me.
And it took my childhood away from me.
He did a lot of horrible, horrible things.
Things that I would never wish upon a child, upon my worst enemy.
I hope that they've gotten the help that they need,
because I will never get over it.
When you suffer
a traumatic childhood or a traumatic event
when you're that young,
whatever age it happens,
it's almost like you get stuck emotionally there.
And you have to cope with that somehow
and so I just ate.
And just ate and ate and ate and ate.
But I didn't care because being fat kept people away.
I never want someone to hurt me.
So the best way to avoid being hurt
is to just isolate yourself,
not form attachments,
and the best way not to form an attachment
is to make yourself undesirable.
If nobody wants me,
then nobody can hurt me.
So, I would gorge myself on food.
It was hard for me to entertain the thought
that someone would ever flirt with me
or find me attractive.
But I was curious.
So when I was 13, I started fooling around on the Internet.
And my dad caught me talking to this older man
that I was attracted to.
So I had no choice but to come out
to my dad that I was gay.
And it was met with resistance.
It was made very known to me that that is not... acceptable.
And was asked to go to my local pastor and talk about it.
And I had a couple of conversations with him.
My inner monologue was like, "This is bull [bleep]."
But you know, you see what you wanna see.
But I was left feeling like I had been abandoned emotionally,
just like I felt after I was molested.
Which did nothing to help with my issues with food.
It just became an even bigger source of comfort.
Going into my freshman year, I was 345 pounds.
But I didn't wanna come out that I was gay to my classmates.
In my sophomore year, I started auditioning for school plays.
And in my senior year, I was cast in a lead part.
And that's when I fell in love with performing on stage.
When I graduated from high school,
the local junior college had a drama department
and I got chosen for another major role in this play.
There were some other gay kids in my theater class
and they invited me to hang with them,
and we started going to bars together.
I discovered how to party
and, uh, it was on.
And before I knew it, I had blown through my college loans
partying and binge eating fast foods when I was living with my friends.
And I wasn't going to school anymore.
I just fell into this rut.
I was not accomplishing anything.
So I left my hometown to take an office job in Houston.
But moving to the heart of a big city where
I didn't know anybody was no ticket to paradise.
And I just started descending into this depression.
I would eat two medium pizzas
an eight piece of chicken,
and wash it down with two sodas
in one sitting.
It was not a good time in my life.
You know, I was already teetering with depression
from my weight and everything,
and so the stress just got to be a lot.
I lost my job,
lost my apartment,
lost my car,
had to move in with my parents.
That's not a easy thing to do, I should say, at 33.
It's kind of embarrassing.
And kind of had a little bit of a...
a nervous breakdown, if you wanna say that.
And even though I knew there wasn't a job
for someone my size in our little town,
I would still look everyday.
And then, high speed Internet came to town.
And finally, after several months,
I found a job working from home.
And I did that job
and, uh,
that gave me the funds to be able to pay rent to live on my own.
-Hello. -You ready?
Yes, sir.
My dad takes me to the store
to help me go and get groceries.
-Some help? -No, I got it.
Because I am too big to fit behind a steering wheel
and to drive my car.
-You got it, Wess? -I got it. [sighs]
-[Rick] You gonna make it? -[Wess] Uh-huh.
I'm gonna try.
My legs are hurting.
[Rick] You wanna go back outside and sit down?
Yeah.
Standing and, like, leaning against the wall
if I have no support, my stomach is gonna start pulling me and
you'll see me like lean forward, go down.
Okay, I'm done.
I gotta go outside and sit down.
I can't do this anymore.
[grunts]
[sighs]
-Hello. -[Wess] Hey.
You think you're gonna be much longer, uh,
I'm ready to go
[stutters] and I need to eat some lunch or something.
Okay, I'll... I'll, uh, be out in a minute.
All right, thank you.
My family is very good at ignoring the elephant in the room.
So we've never addressed the food addiction.
-$116.66. Is that it? -That's it.
But for me, food is a huge comfort.
It is...
my drug of choice.
Food was euphoric for me.
[Rick] Are you feeling all right, Wess?
Mm, no, I'm not, I'm...
I'm embarrassed.
I actually feel like a loser.
A grown man, I can't even buy groceries on my own,
you know.
[Rick] Well, you're not a loser
-by any means. -I know, thank you.
I have triggers when it comes to eating
and a lot of it is just stress related.
Any time I feel like I'm stressed,
the first thing I head for is food.
It's that vicious cycle of,
I eat 'cause I feel bad and then I get big 'cause I eat.
But I get big 'cause I eat, but I eat 'cause I feel bad.
But even with my family, I prefer to eat alone
because food is my
security blanket.
I use it as a reward and I eat so much and I cram it in.
But I usually don't stop until the food is gone.
[sighs] Thank you, Dad. I sure do appreciate it.
I don't mind helping.
I'm gonna put these in the icebox.
Those go in that cupboard over there.
There's never a moment in my life where I'm not thinking about food.
It's very hard for me to admit I have a problem.
'Cause it's like any addiction.
Your mind
creates the addiction
and then you use that as an excuse to keep eating.
And then you just want more and more and more
and you're never satisfied.
I would say without a doubt, 100%, I am a food addict.
I have lost control and my food controls me.
I have imprisoned myself
in this body, in this lifestyle.
And
I need to serve my time
and do the work, pay my debt back,
and that's gonna be through exercising and diet,
so that I can get out of this prison.
Instead of telling my family
and friends that I have a problem,
I just won't have them come over.
And I'll ask them not to come over
and I won't invite them over.
I've walled myself off so I don't get hurt.
And that's just part of this journey that I'm going through,
that I'm gonna have to break those walls down
and... and learn to let people back in.
I need to get serious about... about this.
You know, I need help.
-Let's go. -[clears throat]
[Wess] Today I'm finally gonna do something about my weight problem.
Just about an hour from here
there is a world class surgeon who works on people my size.
And I've known about him for a while
and I finally decided that it's time for me to go see him
to try to get his help.
Oh, it's cold in here.
[Rick] Think a eighth of a tank get you to Rosenberg?
-Sorry? -[Rick speaking]
Yeah. 78 miles.
[Wess panting]
-[Rick] You okay? -[Wess] Yeah.
[Wess panting]
[Wess] Just catching my breath.
[panting]
[grunts]
-You all right? -Yeah.
[Wess] It's nice and cold in this damn car, isn't it?
[Rick] I turned it on a little bit early.
[both laugh]
[Rick] Hey Wess, how... Are you worried about this?
Are you scared to go up here or what?
[Wess sighs]
I'm ready to see Dr. Now. It's...
I'm ready just to start this whole process
and get it over with.
And... I'm ready to make this change.
[Rick] And a big change it will be.
-Yup. -It's just gonna be
a great feeling for me to see you...
...being able to do normal things again.
Yeah, you'll be able to walk where you wanna walk now.
Be able to get the hell away from y'all,
that's what I'll be able to do.
[laughs]
Are you okay back there, Wess?
Are you comfortable?
About as comfortable as I can be
but I'm a little too tall to sit back here.
-Squat down. -Feel like the...
[Rick] You have to squat down a little bit.
[Rick laughs]
[Wess] Pretty much everything gives me anxiety.
So, something like this
where there's everything on the line,
my health, my future, my whole life...
I feel like I have a pit in my stomach.
More than anything, I'm just afraid to hear what Dr. Now has to say.
Now we're here and my anxiety is really, really bad.
Dr. Now might be
the last chance that I have to save my life
and stop from eating myself to death.
I'm desperate for his help
and I just hope to God that he doesn't turn me away
and tell me that he can't help me.
[breathing heavily]
[grunts softly and panting]
Wess...
[Wess] It's been a long time since I weighed myself.
And back then, I was in the low 600s.
So, I think I've gained
a little bit of weight since then.
I'm just hoping I'm below 650.
I'm gonna get lower.
[nurse] You're weight is 705.
[Wess speaking]
Thank you.
[nurse] We'll be going to room five.
Okay. [panting]
[Wess] That's a lot worse than I thought.
[sighs]
I've wasted too much time before getting help.
My situation has gotten so much worse.
I just pray that Dr. Now can help me.
[panting]
[grunts]
[knock on door]
Hello. How are you all doing?
-Good. How are you? -Good. How are you?
I'm doing well.
All right. So, you must be Wess, huh?
-Yes, sir. -And who is this young man with you?
This is my dad, Rick.
Nice to meet you guys. All right, you are 705 lbs.
How long have you been at that weight?
Um, I know a few years ago,
the last time I weighed was probably three or four years ago,
and I was, like, 650 lbs at that time.
So between now and then
it's been anywhere between 650 and 700.
So what is going on in the past few years
that you gained all that weight?
On and off for the last ten years, real bad depression.
I see. Have you seen anybody for that?
-Any therapist? -No. No.
When you eat food, you feel better.
You find food to comfort you.
-Mm-hmm. -So, what issue are you trying to avoid by doing that?
Um, there's a lot of things in my past
that I'm probably working through
and I probably use food to deal with that.
All right. So, do you stay home all day?
Yes, sir.
Who else is in the household beside you?
I live by myself but I live close to my family,
my dad and my aunts and so they're over pretty regularly.
So, you sit at home,
-alone most of the time and eat. -Yeah.
So, your BMI's 112.
Normal BMI is 18 to 25.
And being over 100 BMI is very high.
Your weight is putting a lot of strain on your body right now.
-How old are you right now? -36.
36 and you've got a pretty serious issue with your weight
and you're tolerating that at the moment
but you're getting older,
on top of wear and tear from the strain of your weight
on your body for years.
So, very soon things are gonna change
and your body is gonna get to a point
where you can't go on like this anymore.
Then everything is going to wrong direction
and you're not pulling out of that.
So you have to decide if you want to change.
Because if you don't,
then you're not gonna be able to even walk.
You're gonna stay in your bed,
then you're gonna be bedridden,
depending on people to come and help you out.
And then once you get bedridden, then it's over.
Your health is gonna go downhill really quick
and that's gonna happen really soon
if you keep going like this.
So are you willing to make the changes?
100%, yes sir. I want to get to
where I can live and do things on my own again.
What is something you want to do with your life?
I've always... I always wanted to be on stage.
-Be in front of people. Talk, act, whatever... -Acting.
...things like that. I always loved it.
It was always a passion of mine.
Hopefully this will allow me to get up and do that again.
Well, keep that dream
in front of you to keep you motivated.
Because you're gonna have to work hard
if you want to succeed
and turn your life around. Okay?
-Okay. -The first step is to show me that you're ready for this
by losing some weight and with your current weight,
you have to lose at least 100 lbs.
And this is not something that is gonna be easy
but you're gonna have to bite the bullet and do that.
You need to stick to the 1200 calories a day,
high protein, low carb diet that I'm going to give you
and if you do that, then we might consider you
for weight loss surgery.
But if you're unable to lose that weight,
not only we won't be able to do your surgery,
because of how compromised your system is,
but there would be no point of doing weight loss surgery
because if you aren't willing to work at this
then the surgery will eventually fail
and won't change anything.
-Right. Okay. -Okay?
So at this point you need to
start working hard to change your life.
-Okay. -You think you can do that?
-Yes, sir. -All right, any questions?
No. No, sir.
All right. So, I'm gonna bring you some stuff
and see if we can get you going in the right direction.
-All right. Thank you, sir. -Okay. I'll be back.
-Thank you, sir. -You're welcome.
I don't care how much weight I lose,
I'm not gardening and I'm not going hunting.
-I can't force you. -No.
Wess has let himself get to
a very dangerous place with his health
and I'm concerned about him
because he is over 700 lbs and his BMI is over 100
and he's been at that size for a while now.
So it is just a matter of time before his body gives up.
So it's very important that Wess turn things around now
if we wants to prevent that from happening.
All right.
I got a few things for you.
Okay. First thing I want you to do is
read that very carefully. Okay?
So, go through that,
make a note,
make sure you understand every line
and if you have any questions,
then you're gonna have to ask about it.
[Dr. Now] So we got our work cut out for us with Wess.
Ideally he should be around 200 lbs.
So, he's got 4-500 lbs to lose
and that's gonna be a big challenge for him and us
to get him to the point that
it's gonna be safe to do weight loss surgery on him.
Your frequency should be
three times a day, no snacking between the meal,
amount should be around 400 calories if you eat three time a day
and if you eat two time a day,
it will be 600 calories.
I'm gonna give you a copy of my book to do this chapter 12, the exercise.
And these exercise is geared to do for a person like you.
And you work on this one hour in the morning
and one hour in the evening.
That won't be easy
and it's gonna take a lot of effort
and hard work to make that happen.
But regardless, what happens from here
is all up to Wess.
No one but him can make the choice to change.
And he doesn't have any time to waste.
You got to lose at least 100 lbs over the next two months.
If you do that, then we'll consider weight loss surgery.
-Okay. -So read the stuff that I gave you every night,
make the changes and stick to it.
Yes, sir.
-Okay? -Okay.
All right. In the mean time
if you need anything, give me a call.
-Yes, sir. Thank you. -All right.
-Nice to see you guys. -You too.
-[Rick] Thank you. -[Wess] Thank you.
You're welcome.
-You ready to get out of here? -I'm ready.
-Let's go. -Need some help?
No, I got it.
[Wess] I think the meeting with Dr. Now went well.
As good as to be expected.
I think what Dr. Now told me is doable.
It's gonna take some hard work on my end
and doing some things I haven't done in a few years.
So... You know, it's all a mental game, right?
I think this is gonna be very hard for me to do
but I have no other option. This is my last resort.
Leaving this meeting with Dr. Now,
I know that he has given me the tools that I need
and if I use what he's given me
and build upon them,
then I will probably have a better future.
Hopefully it will get me to a place where I can imagine living in that future.
[grunts]
[knock on door]
Come in.
-Wesley? -Yes, sir.
What's going on?
Nothing. What are you doing?
I've come to help you out a little bit.
-With what? -We're gonna clean out your cupboards today.
-Yeah. -It's time.
The time is here.
-Well... -You ready?
[Wess] Let's get her done.
[Wess] It's been two days since I've seen Dr. Now.
We came back that same day
and my dad gave me time to rest
and prepare for the big cleanse.
Where do you want to start in at?
[Wess] Let's do the cupboard.
Everything but the soups
and the chicken broth.
[Wess] All the junk food, all the crap that I eat,
it is now gonna go bye-bye.
[Rick exclaims]
I don't know what you're talking about.
-I don't see anything. -They were hidden back there.
[Wess] I don't see anything in your hands.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Get rid of 'em. Bye.
I don't think I should've taken my dad to see Dr. Now
because now my dad thinks
that he has carte blanche
to tell me what to eat and what not to eat.
And I like control.
[Rick] You can't have this pasta, can you?
-[Rick] Nope. -[Wess] Oh, God, that hurts.
I'll leave you the wire basket.
I know.
Gone.
-Cookie pop popcorn, no good. -You know,
this was okay when you first came over
but now you're really, like...
[Rick] I'm the junk food junkie police.
You're doing it now.
-What is that? -It's a chocolate bar with almonds.
[Rick] You've got a stash in there?
-Just go find out. -[Rick laughs]
[wrappers crinkling]
What do you got in here, Wess?
[Rick clears throat] Wow.
It's gonna be all right, Wess.
[Wess] My dad does love me
but sometimes I just wanna be left alone.
Wess, I'm gonna take this to the food bank.
He needs a little boot every once in a while.
You know, help him stay started
but he's gonna do good.
I know he will.
[Wess] It's been almost five weeks
since I started on Dr. Now's program
and it hasn't been a walk in the park
but I've been working hard at it.
My dad has been coming over
just about every day to help me with my exercises,
eat with me and keep me accountable.
But I don't wanna be a burden to my dad.
So I told him this is what we'll do for now,
I'll take his help but after I get approved for surgery.
I need to be able to do this on my own.
My dad does love me.
He's a good dad and he looks out for me.
But I know that I'm going to
have to get by without my dad's help as well.
-Hey, Wess. -Hello.
You ready? You ready to go for a walk?
Imma try. Let's go.
Here you go.
I brought you some relief.
Thank you. Let me see your arm.
Thank you, sir.
-You got it? -Yes.
-You wanna walk on the road? -Yeah.
-It's easier than walking here. -Yes, sir.
[Wess] In the morning we do my exercises.
And it takes a lot out of me
but I'm getting better at it now.
I can walk to the dumpster and back.
Whereas before, I could barely even walk outside.
-Gotta get that blood going. -[Wess laughs]
How many times a day can you do this?
Twice.
Two times. It's hard on you.
Yeah.
You'll get in shape. You'll get used to it.
I'm trying my best.
[Wess] The lymphedema on my leg is miserable.
But I know I have to fight through the pain.
So it's a lot. But I feel good about how I'm doing.
And I still have about another month to go before I see the doctor.
-Are you okay? -Let's stop.
You wanna wait a minute before you go back?
Yeah.
-Let me catch my breath. -All right.
[panting]
How was that walk?
[Wess] I'm ready to die.
No. Come on.
Pretty soon you'll be able to do that without even thinking about it.
-Yeah. I know. -You won't even breathe hard.
I'll get there.
-You'll be jogging pretty soon. -Let's go back.
You're ready?
As I'm ever gonna be.
Well, just keep it in your mind
it's a positive thing for you.
Yeah.
[Rick] Since the doctor's visit
Wess has really been doing good.
He's really trying to stay on his diet.
It makes me happy to see Wess losing weight
and really caring about himself again.
Oh, damn.
Use the post.
[panting]
Oh.
You all right?
Yeah. I just gotta catch my breath.
I'm moving 700 pounds. It ain't easy.
I know.
You know, I am a little nervous to see Dr. Nowzaradan today.
I certainly hope that I've lost enough weight.
If I didn't lose enough weight I think he'll be mad at me
and I hope he'll still let me have the surgery
cause I desperately need this.
[Wess] I know I haven't been perfect everyday
and I've strayed off the diet more than once.
But almost everyday I was good.
I didn't compromise or cheat.
And I know I worked hard on my exercises
because my stamina is much better now.
I'm feeling as good as I felt in a long time.
Wess?
-Hello. -How are you?
-[Wess] How are you? -[indistinct conversation]
[Wess] I know I'm getting better.
I just don't know if my progress
is fast enough for Dr. Now.
And there is only one way to find out.
[Wess] I'm at Dr. Nowzaradan's clinic for my first follow up
to see if I've lost enough weight for him to move forward with me.
At my last appointment,
I was 705 pounds.
Dr. Now told me to lose 100 pounds in two months
to get down to 605 today.
[woman] Your weight is 695.
[Wess] That's really disappointing.
Okay. We'll be going to room five.
Thank you.
[Wess] I really thought I had done much better than that.
And the fact that I haven't is very discouraging.
And frankly, I'm not sure what I'm gonna do
because that was as hard as I knew how to work.
[breathing heavily]
-Hello. -Hello.
How are you doing?
-[Wess] Good. How are you doing? -[Rick] Good, ow are you?
All right. So, Wess,
at 695. In two months you only lost a whole 10 pound of weight.
-[Wess] Yes, sir. -So, what's going on with that?
Guess I didn't follow the diet correctly. I don't know.
That's all I can say, is I didn't follow the best of the way I could have.
In what way? Tell me what you did that you shouldn't have.
There's been a couple of days
that I have cheated on my diet.
I will admit that.
Several days that I have cheated on my diet.
So, I already explained the danger
if you stay at the weight you are in.
So, what are you waiting for?
I don't have...
I don't know what to say other than
I messed up.
And all I can do is...
try harder.
Why didn't you do it already? What happened?
[stutters] I'm telling you I didn't stick with the diet.
You asked me what happened.
I'm telling you I didn't stick with the diet.
What's the purpose of coming and telling me that?
To hold me accountable.
So, you want me to be the one
to motivate you to lose weight
and keep you from gaining?
Do I need to call you everyday
and ask you please follow the diet so you can live?
No, sir.
I guess I need...
I need it... How do I say this?
I need it in my face. Does that make sense?
I need it like...
I get what you're saying but if you depend on me
to make a difference then you are never gonna succeed.
You have to motivate yourself
to want to do this, you know, to save your life.
But this is your life and your future.
And you have to decide
if it is worth more to you than food.
It is.
I am happy that I'm losing some weight.
It's not enough.
Um, it needs to be more.
But I am happy that I have lost even 10 pounds at this point.
Well, you know, you need some perfecting on that.
If you lose at this rate, five pounds a month,
then it's gonna take 10 years to get your weight down.
That's never gonna happen.
You know, you're not gonna stick with that.
And you're gonna start to gain again
and you won't survive that long.
So, it's good that you are losing
but you need to understand you're still not doing what you need to save your life.
-[Wess] Yes, sir. -Okay?
So, are you happy that at least you're losing
because your expectation is that you should be gaining weight, right?
Yes, sir.
Okay. That is a destructive mindset
that you need to get out of.
So 10 pound, you can lose 10 pound in two days.
At your weight that's nothing, okay?
So, you're still overeating around 6,500 calories a day.
If you stick to 1,200 calorie a day diet,
you're gonna lose at least two to five pounds a day now.
-Mm-hmm. -Okay?
So, this is gonna be a positive thing for you.
And so that is a optimistic way of looking at it that
you lost 10 pounds in two months.
But then in reality, you are 700 pound
and it seems like you're taking this very casually.
So, this is a situation that you're gonna have to do your part to lose weight.
-Yes. -[Dr. Now] Okay? Work hard for it.
So, if you don't wanna work hard for it
and you wanna have that surgery done to lose weight,
that's gonna have to take some work from you.
And it's gonna be determination, sticking with your diet,
doing your part and all that.
Yes, sir.
-Okay? -Okay.
So I'm gonna give you another two months to lose 90 pounds
that you still owe me
and if you don't make the changes,
and if you're not able to lose the weight,
then the surgery is out of question for you.
Yes, sir.
But in two months, if you haven't lost any weight,
there's no point in coming back and telling me that
you didn't follow the diet.
Yes, sir.
-[Dr. Now] Okay? -Okay.
But if you lose that then we can work with you.
-All right? -Yes, sir.
So, at this point, it's all up to you.
Yes, sir.
Dad, have you been helping him?
Well, I know that Wess wants to lose the weight.
I think that maybe I need to help him a little bit more
and be more, you know, push him a little bit.
I'm gonna have to step in and help I think.
Well, you know, that's good.
But no matter what, it is Wess's responsibility
to be proactive and have control over
his eating habits. Okay?
So, Wess, stick with the healthy eating habit
and we're gonna see how you're doing in two months.
Yes, sir.
-Okay? -Okay.
Any questions?
No, sir, thank you.
Okay. You're gonna have to eventually deal
with your emotional issues behind your overeating.
But right now you have to take the first step
and show me that you're willing to work on this.
If you are then we'll give you the tools to keep you going.
But if not then nothing we do will last for you.
So, you have to do this.
-Okay? -All right.
All right. We're gonna see how we do next time when we see you.
Okay.
And if you need anything let me know.
-Thank you. -All right. See you in two months.
-[Wess] All right. Thank you. -Okay.
What do you think?
I think I got my ass handed to me.
[laughs] Well, I know that.
Wess doesn't seem to believe the reality of his situation
and how dangerous it is for him to continue at this weight.
So, he's still choosing food over his life and dreams.
But if he doesn't wake up right now
and start doing what he needs,
then it's not gonna be long before everything I'm warning him of starts to happen
and once he does, he's gonna be out of time.
So, the clock is ticking for him
and if he doesn't want to get to a point of no return,
he has to take responsibility for his life
and actions now.
[Wess] I think Dr. Now did what I needed.
I think it was a shock to my system.
I have to remind myself that
it comes from a place of caring.
People don't get to be 700 pounds
without living in a world of their own creating,
without being able to deny reality. Right?
They don't get to be this size without having enablers in their life.
Dr. Now has to be that person
that pulls them out of that
false world they have and brings them to reality.
And he does that because he doesn't wanna see them hurt.
He doesn't wanna see them die. He wants them to live.
And I'm not blaming anybody else.
It is my fault that I got this size.
[Wess] It's been a month since my follow up with Dr. Now.
And in many ways, that appointment
was a bigger wakeup call than my first one
because I am finally trying to turn my life around.
And I thought I was doing better.
But then to see that I had only lost 10 pounds,
I was mortified.
I know I have to do a lot better than that
and I'm determined to make sure that I do.
I don't want another repeat when I go back to Dr. Now
and have the same lousy progress.
I can't disappoint him like that.
That look he gives you,
you don't ever wanna get that look.
[laughing]
Once was enough.
So, I am taking responsibility for myself.
I am not looking for anyone else to motivate me.
I heard him tell my dad
that it's not his responsibility
or anyone else's to make me do what I need to do.
The way he was checking on me everyday
was only gonna be for a couple of months
until I lost the weight I needed to for the surgery.
And I didn't do that. So that's on me.
My dad shouldn't have to keep bearing the responsibility for that.
And other people in my family need him too.
So, I told my dad this is something
I need to do on my own.
I need to be the one to make the changes
like Dr. Now said.
I'm sticking to the program.
It's kicking my butt but I'm still doing it
and I'm doing all the exercises each day.
And more importantly,
I've cut back on my eating a whole lot more.
Close to 1,200 calories a day.
I stay away from sugar, carbs
and there's been no cheating with that at all.
It's hard but I've stuck to it with the whole month.
I plan to stick with it for the next month too
and way beyond because I'm serious about this.
And I really hope when I go back to see Dr. Now in a month
that the scale says I'm serious too.
[Wess] Well, we're headed back to Dr. Now's again.
I am really, really nervous
because a lot is riding on what the scale has to say.
I can't mess it up again like I did last time.
And I've worked extra hard to make sure it's gonna be different today.
I know if I haven't lost enough weight this time,
I'm gonna be really screwed
because I've done everything I could
possibly do this time around.
Next.
[Wess] At my last weigh in, I was 694 pounds
and Dr. Now said I had to lose 90 pounds
in two months.
And if I did that, I'd be down to at least 604 today.
That's good.
-Well... -Going down.
-It's there-- it's something. -[both laughing]
Thank you.
[Wess] That feels really good,
I've never lost that much weight in my entire life
and I'm really proud of myself for doing that.
I just really hope that Dr. Now,
can look past the fact that I was a couple of pounds short of my goal.
[knock on door]
Hello, how are you all doing?
-Hello. -[Rick] Good. How are you?
I'm good, thank you.
All right, Wess.
So, it looks like you figured out what to do, to lose some weight, right?
Yes, sir.
So you're down to 606?
Yes, sir.
So you lost 100 lbs like you needed.
Yes, sir.
You kicked my butt last time I was here, I didn't want to do that again.
-You're right. -[laughing]
So we'll go ahead then and approve you for surgery.
-Thank you. -Okay?
[Rick] Cool.
So, we're gonna set you up for surgery for next month
and until then, continue to lose weight.
-Okay. -'Cause if you go to the hospital
and you haven't lost any weight,
we're gonna send you home.
Yeah. [laughing]
-Okay? -Yes, sir.
All right. Also, continue to work on your exercises too, don't forget about those.
And see if you can improve your stamina, okay?
-Okay, I'll do it. -All right then.
-Any questions? -No, sir.
All right, I'm proud of your progress, so keep it up,
until the surgery.
-Okay? -Yes, sir.
Thank you for everything.
-You're welcome. -[Rick] Thank you, doc.
I'm very happy to see that Wess got serious about his health and his life
and start taking responsibility for his choices.
He's taken the first step and shown me,
he's willing to work, to do what he needs to improve his life.
So we can move ahead with him and give him more tools,
to help him get healthy.
He still has a long road ahead
but weight loss surgery is going to be an important step
that will help him get to his goal.
But the real hard work is still ahead for him.
So, it's not time for him to let up at all,
he needs to keep working hard and do everything he needs.
If he expects to succeed and improve his health for the long term.
I got approved for my surgery.
[Wess] I am elated,
I-- Words cannot describe how I feel, I think I'm in shock right now.
When I came last time, those numbers were a wakeup call.
With such a world of delusion, that I was living in,
I vowed to myself that was never gonna happen again.
So I'm not gonna let myself do anything to waste this chance.
Bye.
I'll see you when you get out.
[laughs] Bye.
-I love you. -I love you too, bye.
I am feeling trepidacious, I guess the best word to describe it.
I'm anxious, I'm excited,
nervous, it's scary.
You know the unknown is scary, plus...
You know I think at the end of the day, this represents a change
and this is a culmination of,
everything that I have been scared to dream about for years now.
I finally decided to commit to that and do it
and this is like, gonna make it real.
And for someone who tends to always expect the worst,
of something to happen, this is a challenge to fight that,
monster in your head of anxiety
and that's what I'm dealing with right now.
[Dr. Now] Today we're gonna do a sleeve gastrectomy on Wess.
He continued to lose weight and he's down to 582,
so he lost another 24 lbs, this past month.
So, he's working hard and he's ready for this operation.
But this is a very risky surgery
because doing surgery on somebody that size is still very risky.
If we have any issues with anesthesia, with the blood pressure
or oxygen saturation,
then we may have to stop the surgery.
Okay, let's begin.
[indistinct]
[Dr. Now] Go up.
Look at that...
[Dr. Now] Hold it there.
Bring the robot.
But if we are able to complete the surgery,
it's gonna be a great help for him to be able to lose weight.
[robot] Dock the remaining arms.
[Dr. Now] All right. I'm gonna transition to robot.
Because we're doing an operation that we're gonna take almost
about 80 percent of the stomach out
and leave him with a small narrow 20 percent stomach volume
that is gonna help him to eat less and be able to lose more weight.
[machine beeps]
Do that again for me.
[indistinct conversation]
I'm a little anxious,
to see how, how it goes, to see how he does.
It must have been hard for him, you know, of course,
it's been hard for him to get around, to just be-- live a normal life.
But it's fixing to get better.
I am very hopeful
and I think it will, because it took a lot... on Wess,
you know, on Wess's part, to even be here.
[Dr. Now] Okay, we're removing the detached portion.
It's big, isn't it?
Keep pulling, keep pulling. Keep pulling.
All right.
Got it.
He had a long stomach. Huh?
-[assistant] Mm. -Put that on the table over there.
[digital beeping]
Okay, we can suture him up.
Wess's surgery went very well.
Luckily, we didn't have any issue with the surgery
and we were able to complete gastric sleeve on him.
And after this operation, he's gonna be able to lose more weight
and it's gonna be much easier for him to be able to control his eating habit.
He's gonna be on a liquid diet for the next month
and be able to lose 40 lbs in the first month,
and after that, 25 lbs a month,
and each month, until he gets closer to his ideal body weight.
This was an important step for Wess today,
but he still has a lot of work to do to get to his goal.
Wess has a big lipo lymphedema masses in both thigh
and one side is much bigger than the other one,
as he loses some weight we're gonna have to remove those for him,
to get that lymphedema corrected.
But the most important thing is that he's gonna have
to start to deal with his emotional issues,
that driving him to eat,
or it's gonna be just a matter of time
before he's starts to overeat again.
So, we will start him going to therapy soon, to keep him on track.
But at this point, he's doing very well
and hopefully, next 12 to 18 months,
he's gonna be very close to his ideal body weight.
But he has a lot of work to do to get there.
Come on, let's go water.
Okay, let's go water.
[Wess] It's been a month since my weight loss surgery and I'm feeling really good.
-Do you wanna water, I'll hand you the water hose. -Yeah.
Need to water this one too.
[Wess] We'll do this one first.
[Wess] I went back to see Dr. Now, for my one month
post op follow up appointment.
Dr. Now cleared me to work out and do all my physical activity again.
So, I've actually been trying to get out and do more.
They're only making it because it gets shady half the day.
-Right. -Look at my asparagus, man.
[Wess] And I've lost 34 lbs since surgery,
which wasn't bad.
But Doc said it should be more like 40.
Straighten my hose out.
[Wess] So he was a little concerned and he told me,
that I needed to lose at least 25 lbs over the course of the next month
to stay on track.
About 15 more feet and I'll be good.
Done.
[Wess] And I don't want anything to slow down how much I should be losing.
Because I wanna keep making all the progress
I need with my weight loss and my stamina.
I need to go sit down.
So, I'm very happy I'm able to do this,
and spend some time with my dad,
doing something other than him helping me or looking after me.
Oh, I like to garden.
You reap your rewards you know, when you harvest your...
what you worked hard at all the spring and stuff.
[Rick] I feel sad to know that if he doesn't turn his life around that
he could die.
You know, that doesn't have to happen.
It'll work out for good for him,
it's just a matter of him putting his mind and doing it.
I can only do so much.
-What's this for? -Taste it.
I'll make you a deal, you take it home, chop it up and fry it.
You can't fry them, it's too hard.
[Wess] Stubborn old man.
[Rick laughs]
[Wess] I'm a little bit scared about my weigh-in today.
I really just want to stay on track and not disappoint Dr. Now,
so I'm hoping I lost what I should be losing.
I'm paying attention to what I eat and how much,
and making sure I'm not grazing or snacking throughout the day.
And I think I've been doing well enough but we'll see.
[door closes]
Wess.
Hello. How are you?
-How are you? -[sighs in relief] Glad I made it just past the rain.
-I see it's raining. -[Wess chuckles]
At my last appointment I was 548
and I'm supposed to be losing at least 25 lbs a month.
So, that means I should be down to 523 today.
Okay.
Okay. Pretty good, huh?
-Real good. -[chuckles] Yeah, let's go.
Okay, down the hall to the right, room five
-and I'll let the doctor know you're ready. Okay? -Thank you.
[Wess] That's not bad, but it's not 25,
so I'm worried because I wanna stay on track
and be where I need to be right now.
And it doesn't look like I am.
[knock on door]
Hello. How are you all doing?
Good. How are you?
-You all doing okay? -I am, yes, sir.
All right. So how do you feel like your progress coming on?
I think it's doing pretty good I'm sticking to the diet.
Dad, how's he doing at home?
-Behaving? -Yeah, he's doing good.
-He's doing good. Are you happy with that? -I think he's doing good.
Oh, yeah.
All right, Wess. So, you're down to 530.
Yes, sir.
So you lost 18 pounds this month,
which isn't bad but you should be losing at least 25 lbs a month,
this soon after weight loss surgery.
And so, you must be grazing a little during the day huh?
Hmm. No.
You may not realize it but you are.
The surgery will only prevent you
from eating too much at one time.
And get rid of your hunger and physical drive to eat,
but you can still eat a little at a time here and there
and that can add up.
And you're doing that because of emotional eating.
For somebody in your weight range that,
you started with, you have to have some emotional issues...
-Yes. -...that driving you to eating.
And after surgery, those emotional issues may come to surface even more.
So I think right now, is the appropriate time to get you
to a see a therapist and work on those issues.
-Yes, sir. -So, we'll have a long term result
with your weight loss surgery.
We don't want you to temporarily lose weight and gain it back,
because you go back to the same emotional issues
that drive you to eat like you did, till you get
to be over 700 lbs.
-Mmm-hmm. -This is going to be an important factor
for you to work with the therapist,
to get everything under control.
-Yes, sir. -Okay?
In the meantime, if you need anything, give me a call.
-Yes, sir. -All right.
I'll see you all soon.
-Yes, sir. Thank you. -Thank you.
Overall I think Wess is doing well right now.
His weight loss is a little slow
and my concern is that
that is a crack in the foundation we need to pay attention to.
Anyone who's made it to Wess's size is eating compulsively.
Because of emotional issues driving them to eat.
And if we don't address that, they won't be successful in the long term.
After weight loss surgery,
physical hunger is gone
and when the patient still have drive to eat after that
at that point they cannot deny that there's not
a significant emotional component behind that.
So, that is the best time to start therapy with them to address that.
And Wess is at that point.
[Wess] So, I think starting therapy is a good idea
and I agree, it's something I need.
I'm still not necessarily looking forward to it,
but I'm ready to do it because the alternative is
for my weight loss to start slowing down and I start gaining again.
And that's not gonna work for me.
Today we are going to our first appointment with Dr. Paradise.
I'm excited, so I think Dr. Paradise could help me today
with my emotional problems.
You know, I've got a lot of, uh,
emotional things that I need to work through.
And I think Dr. Paradise will, uh,
hopefully help me learn to
not cope with my emotions through eating.
That's gonna be my biggest hope out of all of this.
I'm ready to get this started
and, um, see where it takes me.
[Dr. Paradise] Wess?
-Hello. -Hi, I'm Dr. Paradise. Come on in.
-Come on in. You can have a seat right over there. -Yes, sir. Thank you.
-Welcome. -Hello.
I'm glad you're here.
Tell me about your childhood, who was in your house?
What was going on with your parents?
My parents had a volatile relationship.
-And they divorced when I was three. -Okay.
My dad got custody in the divorce, so I lived with him.
And then, um,
-shortly after there. -Mm-hmm.
Um, another family member of mine lived close to us.
Consequently, he ended up molesting me.
What do you remember as a kid? How did you process that?
I think I just ignored it.
What do you think that did to you?
Well, I got to 700 pounds,
[laughing] so, apparently not very well.
How do you talk to your parents about the abuse?
I don't.
My father told me when I was probably...
11 or 12 that nobody wanted to hear about it.
That it makes people sad, so don't talk about it.
I came out at 13.
I was told in no uncertain terms that it was not acceptable.
Wess, I feel like you're still
part of the system that fundamentally
refuses to acknowledge core parts of your existence.
-Yeah. -The fact that you were abused.
The fact that you're gay, like,
big, huge parts of your identity are just swept under the rug.
How do we make you own your truth?
[Wess] I don't know.
[Dr. Paradise] Could you talk to either of your parents about the abuse?
Could you have a conversation?
Probably not at this point.
Wess, you are a strong, confident guy.
And I think you could make a very persuasive argument
to whoever in your family you're talking to.
That, you know what, "Our secrets are
-keeping us down." -Yes.
"And the secrets that you have kept about me have kept me down
and they're part of the reason that I got this big."
And it will facilitate your believing that you're worth
the life that you deserve.
That can certainly take the form of conversations with your dad.
[Wess] I would...
...be willing to do that.
-I think this is a big deal, man. -Mm-hmm.
I think it's all,
it's all positive after this.
I hope.
-I'm so glad you came in. -Thank you for having me.
-Good to meet you. -Yes, sir.
[Wess] Today, the session went pretty well.
We talked about some hard emotional things that I haven't faced in a while.
But I think all in all, it went pretty well.
Part of my homework is having to have conversations with my dad
that we probably haven't had, ever.
So, um, that makes me nervous.
But that's something that I'm gonna have to push through.
-Thank you, sir. -Take care.
It's been a couple of days since I saw Dr. Paradise.
And today, I'm going to do my work somewhere out in the world.
And I'm nervous about it, 'cause I'm not used to going out into public.
Staying in my bed all day doesn't lead to good things for me.
It leads to a lazy life
and it's part of how I got to where I was.
But now that I've lost some weight, I'm feeling better about it.
I'm still big enough that people will stare
and I'm still afraid of breaking the furniture.
But as hard as this was,
I know it's nothing compared to the other stuff that Dr. Paradise wants me to do.
So I'm planning on talking to my father in the next couple of days
and starting a conversation.
There's part of me that's scared,
but I know that I want to go through with it.
[Wess] Come on in.
-Woo-hoo, look at all that food. -[Rick] Lunch time.
Lunch time for you, you enjoy it while I have my damn Jell-O.
[laughing]
What did y'all make?
Oh, some pork ribs and...
...sausage.
[Wess] Mmm, let me smell it, that'll,
that'll help me.
I asked my dad to come over for lunch
and I told him I wanna talk about some stuff.
But he doesn't know what it's about
and he probably would never guess.
I'm nervous and I really hope this goes well.
Because I don't wanna hurt my dad's feelings.
But there's plenty I need to get off my chest if I'm gonna heal.
Gotta love my Jell-O.
[Rick chuckles] All right.
Did you wanna get a smell of this?
-I could smell it from here. -[Rick laughing]
Don't eat it too fast, it might give you indigestion.
Yummy, yummy, yummy.
So, you know, the other day I had a therapist appointment with Dr. Paradise.
Uh-huh.
And we talked about some stuff, you know, from my childhood,
you know I had some bad things happen, but who doesn't?
And part of my homework was he wanted me to talk to you about it.
See how you felt about it.
Well, I'm sorry that it happened.
I never would've imagined that happening.
You know, when you go through some traumatic stuff growing up,
it can affect your life.
I'm sure. I'm sure...
-...that it never leaves your mind. -No.
I'm sure of that.
And so, I think it's good that I'm seeing Dr. Paradise now
so that I could start working through those things.
And getting the help that I need.
So that I don't fall back into the old traps of self-medicating with food.
You know, I've lost quite a bit of weight already.
And I've done very well and I'm proud of myself.
And I don't wanna go back to the way I was.
-And I'm proud of you as well. -Thank you.
'Cause let's be honest, eating that much and getting myself to the size I was,
that's a form of self-harm, you know.
[Rick] And you know that never crossed my mind.
You being...
-...addicted to food. -Mm-hmm.
But I never saw any of the signs
-of depression. -Oh, I was good at hiding it.
I never did and I never...
You know, I feel bad about that.
But I think talking about it,
-probably the best medicine, really. -Yes.
Because there's no physical medicine you could take to change anything.
Just talking about it and getting it out in the air
and getting it off of your shoulders,
that weight you're carrying around, that depression.
It makes me think back now that if I would've known...
...I could've done something.
[Wess] You know, as far as the trauma goes,
we can't blame anybody but the person that did that.
That person was old enough to know the difference between right and wrong.
And they chose to do wrong.
And the only person
in this world that is responsible for what happened to me
is the person that did it.
Just know from me, Dad,
and I want you to know this sincerely from me.
I don't hold you responsible for any of that.
-I don't blame you for any of that. -I'm glad.
And I can say to myself who has the real blame.
That's not you and that's definitely not me.
That's the [bleep] that did it
and quite frankly, if that [bleep] burned in hell for the rest of eternity,
I'd be happy.
[Wess] Well, that wasn't so bad.
I'm proud of myself for doing this.
I feel like it was a good first step for me and my dad
and our relationship together.
I just wanna heal and I feel like I've started that process today.
I know it's gonna be a long process,
but at least I've started it.
And I'm hoping this puts me on the road to get where I need to go
for my next appointment with Dr. Now.
[Wess] Just in time for the rain.
Oh, yeah.
[breathing heavily]
-Wess. -Okay. Let's go.
Hello.
-How are you? -I'm good.
-Hi, how're you doing? -Morning.
[Wess] At my last weigh-in two months ago,
I was 530 pounds.
I'm supposed to be losing around 25 pounds a month these days.
So that means if I stay on track,
I'll be right at around 480 pounds today.
All right. Step on up.
[nurse] Hold it.
477.
Step off for me.
Sounds good.
-That's great. -[Wess giggles]
[Wess] Oh my, oh my. It feels good to be ahead of the curve for once.
Usually, I'm a little nervous
but today, I'm excited to hear what the doctor has to say.
Yeah.
[knocking]
Hello, how y'all doing?
-[Wess] Good. Hi, Dr. Now. -[Rick] Hi, Doctor.
All right, good. Well, Wess, you're making good progress.
You're down to 477.
So, you lost 53 pounds over the last two months.
So you picked up the pace like you needed.
I see that therapy is helping you to deal with your emotional drive to eat
-and help to cope with that, right? -Yes.
[Dr. Now] All right, so keep up the good work.
-I'm proud of your progress. -Thank you.
[Dr. Now] Just stick with therapy and doing what you need with them.
And if you stay on track, we'll be able to remove the lymphedema mass.
And then, any extra skin...
-Yes. -...that needs to come off and then we'll work on that.
-Yes. -But in the meantime,
I want you to keep working hard
and maybe in 12 months, you're gonna hit your goal weight.
-So, keep it up. I'm proud of your progress. -Thank you, sir. Thank you.
-And Dad is proud of your progress, too. -[Rick] Oh, yeah.
-Yeah, it's wonderful. -All right.
Wess, I'll see you in two months.
Your weight loss is doing good.
Keep it up and lose another 50 pounds by your next appointment.
And if you need anything before then, give me a call.
-Yes, sir. Thank you. -[Rick] Thank you.
-Okay. -[Wess] Thank you for everything.
-You're quite welcome. -Have a good one.
You too.
[Dr. Now] I'm very encouraged to see
that Wess has made some improvements with his monthly weight loss.
He's moving in the right direction
and I'm very proud of him for working hard to make that happen.
He still has a lot of work ahead to get to his goal.
But Wess has consistently shown me he's willing to put the hard work he needs.
So right now, I'm confident that he will stay on track for the long term.
He may have some off months here and there, but that's okay.
This process is a struggle
and it's not about being perfect.
It's about getting healthy at the rate the body needs.
And turning your life around to have a bright future
to start looking forward to.
And Wess is doing that, so I know he's gonna stick with it
and keep working at what he needs to get to his goal over the next year
and have the life he wants.
And I'm very proud of him for that.
[Wess] Well, that feels really good.
And I'm proud of myself for doing what I needed.
I don't even remember the last time I was 400 pounds.
What I'm doing seems to be working, so I'm just gonna stick to it.
You know, it feels like I've come so far
and yet it really is just the beginning of what is going to come next.
It's hard to believe that I have as many choices now as I do.
And that's something that's going to be hard to get used to.
Because it's such a different mindset than I've had in the past.
Believing in myself,
believing in my future.
It's going to take a minute before I really feel like I'm worth it.
All the way deep down.
Gotta fake it until I make it.
So I'll start by acting like I'm worth it.
Why not?
And we'll see where this path takes me.
-[receptionist] Hi. -Hi.
-How're you doing? Thank you. -Welcome to The Plaza.
[Wess] So, I did something my dad liked
and now my dad has agreed to do something I like.
-You wanna sit over there? -Yeah.
[Wess] We're gonna go see a play together today and I'm excited.
I'm always nervous going out in public.
But this is something I've wanted to do for a long time without being able to.
[applauding]
So, now that I'm actually doing it,
I'm actually super excited.
Being on stage is something I have always wanted to do.
It might be the only thing that I've ever felt called to do.
Like, I have a calling for it.
And I never had a chance to do it.
Today, just seeing these individuals up here on stage.
It filled me with a sense of longing
but also, it felt like something attainable.
And so, I got really kind of excited.
A little overwhelmed.
And a bit of anxiety.
But a more hopeful anxiety than I'm used to.
I'm used to feeling doom or dread
and this was more like a possibility.
And that feeling, like, this is a fear I know I should overcome.
-Thank y'all so much. -Thanks for coming.
[Wess] I've always wanted to be on stage
but when I was 700 pounds it was scary to think about being up there.
-How's that? -[Wess] Okay.
-Thank you. Bye-bye. -[woman] Bye. Thanks for coming.
[Wess] Now that I'm losing the weight...
[in sing-song voice] Hello!
Thanks.
I wonder if there's a stage that can hold me.