male narrator: WHEN STORAGE UNITS ARE ABANDONED,
IN THE GREAT STATE OF TEXAS,
THE TREASURES WITHIN...
- THAT'S THE PRIZE.
narrator: ARE PUT UP FOR AUCTION.
- YEAH. - RIGHT HERE.
- YEAH.
narrator: COMING UP...
- I'D LIKE TO FIND SOMETHING ODD.
WHAT IN THE WORLD-- WHAT IS THIS?
- IF IT WORKS,
YOU COULD EVEN INCREASE THE VALUE FURTHER.
- "STAND UP."
WHAT IS THIS?
[gasps] HOLY--
- JUST PICK THAT UP.
- GOD DANG.
IT'S DEFINITELY BIZARRE.
"WILL CAUSE SHOCK, BURN, OR DEATH."
[country rock music]
- THAT'S THE GRAVY TRAIN RIGHT THERE.
- YOU'LL NEVER BELIEVE WHAT WE FIND.
- JERRY! MY STORE IS ON THE LINE HERE.
- THIS IS ALL PROFIT.
IT'S FABULOUS.
- ♪ MONEY OWNS THIS TOWN ♪
♪ YEAH, YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT ♪
♪ MONEY OWNS THIS TOWN ♪
- AND IT'S SOLD!
- TODAY WE'RE IN BURLESON.
NOW IF TEXAS HAD A BIBLE BELT, THIS WOULD BE IT.
HOPEFULLY, OUR BUYERS WILL BE HOLY ROLLING IN CASH
BEFORE THE DAY IS THROUGH.
- OOH, REFRESHED.
I'M READY. WE NEED TO BUY SOME STUFF.
WOMEN'S MERCHANDISE IS SELLING REAL WELL
AT THE WAREHOUSE.
SO TODAY, ANYTHING THAT LOOKS
REMOTELY FEMININE IS GOING TO GET A CLOSER LOOK.
- WHAT'S UP, MR. BUBBA?
YOU'RE LOOKING GOOD TODAY, MY MAN.
BEEN WORKING OUT?
- YEAH, I DID THREE MILES BEFORE--
- YOU DID THREE MILES?
DUDE, I CAN'T EVEN DO THREE MILES.
I KNOW--I KNOW YOU'RE FIBBING TO ME THERE.
TODAY I'M GOING TO PUT ASIDE THE TRICKS.
PUT ASIDE THE HEAD GAMES,
AND FOCUS ON GETTING A QUALITY LOCKER.
- MY STORE HAS BEEN BLOWING OUT FURNITURE.
THIS IS A REAL NICE AREA.
HOPE THEY GOT A LOT OF UNITS. - YUP.
- SO TODAY, WHAT DO YOU THINK I'M LOOKING FOR?
- GOOD MORNING, LESA. HOW ARE YOU?
YOU LOOK GOOD. - THANK YOU.
- DID YOU HAVE YOUR HAIR CUT?
- NO. I STRAIGHTENED IT.
- OH, COME ON, LESA. YOU CAN'T FALL FOR THAT.
- YOU LOOK EXCEPTIONALLY NICE TODAY.
- THANK YOU.
- I'M ALWAYS ON THE LOOKOUT FOR MID-CENTURY,
BUT I'D LIKE TO FIND SOMETHING ODD
FOR MY MORE ECCENTRIC CUSTOMERS.
TODAY'S GOING TO BE A GOOD DAY.
- LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
HERE ARE THE RULES FOR TODAY'S AUCTION.
WE'RE GOING TO OPEN THE DOOR,
YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE FIVE MINUTES TO LOOK AROUND,
THERE'LL BE NO KICKING, NO REACHING IN
OR TOUCHING THE BOXES.
TODAY'S SALE IS A CASH-ONLY SALE.
PLEASE BID WITH THE MONEY YOU HAVE IN YOUR POCKETS.
ARE YOU READY TO GO? [cheering]
HAMMER UP! LET'S GO!
[groaning]
- IT'S TOO JUNKY. - IT'S WAY JUNKY.
- THE THING ABOUT THE FEMALE SPECIES
IS THEY LIKE PRETTY,
AND THIS AIN'T PRETTY.
- OKAY, I SEE A BUNCH OF BALD TIRES,
A CRACKED STOVE TOP, REMOTE WITH NO TV.
YOU'D HAVE TO BE A MORON TO BUY THIS ONE.
IT'S GOING TO COST ME MONEY TO DUMP THIS [bleep].
- THEY MAY ALL SEE JUNK
BECAUSE THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY'RE LOOKING AT.
THIS GUY WAS PUTTING UP STEEL BUILDINGS.
THAT'S PART OF IT RIGHT THERE.
THAT'S FOR ME.
- LET'S SEE WHAT I GOT HERE.
THIS IS AN INDUSTRIAL UNIT.
THIS IS SOME KIND OF COMPRESSOR DOWN HERE.
HORSE BRIDLE.
A HORSE BRIDLE IN THE MIDDLE
OF ALL THAT INDUSTRIAL STUFF?
I'M GOING TO GAMBLE AND SAY
THERE'S MORE ODDITIES WHERE THAT CAME FROM.
- SELL MY LITTLE TIRE UNIT HERE.
[auctioneering]
- 25.
NOW 50.
- 50.
- NOW 75.
- RIGHT HERE.
- 100.
- NOW 125.
- [laughing]
- 125.
- NOW 150. - 150.
- NOW 175. - 175.
- ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
- 200, 200.
- 200. - 200.
NOW, 225. 225.
- I THINK THAT'S JUST ABOUT IT.
- 225 ONCE, TWICE.
I SOLD IT. $200, MOE.
- EVERYBODY THINKS THIS IS JUNK,
BUT THAT BRIDLE IS GOING TO LEAD TO SOME ODD FINDS.
[crowd exclaims]
[overlapping chatter]
- HELL OF A SAW, HELL OF A CART.
- I'M SEEING SOME STUFF FROM HIS GARAGE,
BUT I'M ALSO SEEING SOME STUFF FROM HER ATTIC.
- YEAH, GOING TO BID ON THIS.
- THAT HANDMADE QUILT DIDN'T BELONG TO SOME DUDE.
- WORKSHOP STUFF IS ALL FINE AND GOOD,
BUT I'M REALLY LOVING THOSE BOXES.
- THERE'S A PILE OF BOXES IN THE BACK.
THEY'RE ABOUT A FOOT FROM THE WALL.
IT MAKES ME THINK THERE'S SOMETHING BEHIND THERE.
- WHAT DO YOU SEE IN HERE?
BUNCH OF BOXES AND BINS.
THOSE MYSTERY BOXES-- THEY LEAD STRAIGHT TO THE BANK.
- THOSE MYSTERY BOXES LEAD STRAIGHT TO THE DUMP.
- WHAT DO Y'ALL WANT TO GIVE HERE NOW?
100. 100, NOW.
- HOW ABOUT 100? RIGHT HERE.
- 100. NOW 125.
125. - 125.
150.
NOW 175.
175. 200, 200 NOW.
200, 200, 200 NOW. NOW 225.
- 225, RIGHT HERE. - 225.
- NOW, I HAVE 250.
NOW, 275.
275. - 275 RIGHT HERE.
- 300, 300. NOW 325.
ANYBODY WANT TO GIVE 325?
- YUP. - 325.
NOW 350, 350. NOW 350.
350, NOW 375. 375.
- YUP. - NOW 400, NOW 425.
NOW 450. WANNA DO 450? - YUP.
- NOW 475. 475.
- 500, 500 NOW. - YUP.
- NOW 525. 525.
I HAVE 525 THERE.
- YUP. - NOW 550, 550.
NOW 575.
575 ONCE, 575 TWICE.
I SOLD IT, $550.
PUT IT ON BUBBA. $550, BUBBA.
- FROM THE TOOLS TO THE GIRLY STUFF,
I CAN TELL YOU RIGHT NOW,
THIS LOCKER'S GOING TO BE A WIN-WIN.
- I SAW THIS HORSE BRIDLE
IN THE MIDDLE OF ALL THIS INDUSTRIAL STUFF.
SO I'M GOING TO SLIP AWAY FROM THE AUCTION,
AND SEE IF THERE'S ANY OTHER ODD STUFF IN THERE.
THAT'S SCRAP.
TEN CENTS A POUND.
WELL, WE GOT SOME TOOLS HERE.
$25 VALUE.
THIS PAIR OF JACKS HERE-- $300.
THIS IS A PUMP.
I WOULD SAY AT LEAST $250.
THAT HORSE WAS ABOUT 16 HANDS.
THAT'S A BIG BRIDLE.
THE INDUSTRIAL STUFF'S NOT BAD,
BUT I'M PROBABLY THE ODDEST THING IN THIS LOCKER.
- WHOA.
WHAT IN THE WORLD?
WHAT IS THIS?
"LUNKENHEIMER."
THIS IS SOLID BRASS.
I LOVE BRASS.
I DON'T KNOW IF THIS IS A PUMP OR A VALVE OR WHAT,
BUT IT IS BRASS.
AND I'M GOING TO HAVE TO GET IT LOOKED AT.
OH. HERE, IT'S DATED.
"PATENT, MARCH 23rd, 1950."
[laughs]
I GOT TO GET THIS THING CHECKED OUT,
BUT FIRST, I GOT TO GET BACK TO THE AUCTION.
all: WHOA!
- WE'RE JUST GOING TO SET THESE DOWN.
- CAN YOU TELL ME WHAT'S IN THEM FIRST?
- NO. - OH, COME ON.
- [laughs]
- [laughs mockingly]
- THAT'S A NICE LITTLE CHEST RIGHT HERE.
LITTLE TIGER OAK.
- OH, YEAH. THAT IS AN ANTIQUE.
GOOD PIECE.
THE TWO THINGS THAT I KNOW ABOUT WOMEN
IS THEY LIKE DECORATING, AND THEY LOVE THEIR ANTIQUES.
SCIENCE TELLS US IT'S IN THEIR DNA.
- ALL RIGHT, JERRY.
THERE'S A LOT OF FURNITURE IN HERE.
A LOT OF BINS.
THERE'S ENOUGH FURNITURE TO FILL A HOUSE.
- THAT'S ENOUGH FURNITURE TO FILL A HOUSE.
- DESK, CABINET.
PARTICLEBOARD.
THIS IS NOT MY THING.
- WELL, LOOKY, LOOKY, LOOKY.
THIS UNIT WAS ACCESSED A LOT.
THIS IS WHY THEY HAVE THE CENTER AISLE IN HERE.
YOU KNOW, CLEARLY, THEY USED THIS AS A GARAGE.
THEY GOT A CENTER AISLE,
THINGS ARE NEATLY ORGANIZED ON BOTH SIDES,
SO I IMAGINED THIS IS WHERE THEY KEPT THEIR BEST STUFF.
- ALL RIGHT, SELL MY LITTLE HOUSEHOLD LOCKER HERE.
WHAT DO Y'ALL WANT TO GIVE NOW?
[auctioneering] - $50, RIGHT HERE.
- 50, NOW 100. - RIGHT.
- NOW 200, 200.
- 125. - 125.
- RIGHT HERE. - NOW 175, 175.
- 175. - NOW 200.
- RIGHT HERE. - NOW 250, LET'S DO THAT.
250? WILL YOU GIVE 250?
- SKIP TILL THEY DIE. YEAH, SEE IF THEY DIE DOWN.
- RIGHT HERE. - 250, NOW 300.
300, 300, 300, 300.
- RIGHT HERE. - 350.
NOW 400. NOW 450.
- RIGHT HERE. - 450.
NOW 500.
- RIGHT HERE. - 550, NOW 600.
- RIGHT HERE. - NOW 650.
NOW 700. NOW 750.
- BRING IT UP. - 750. NOW 800.
- BRING IT. - 850. 900.
- 900. - BRING IT.
- NOW 950.
- OH, COME ON, LESA.
HE'S DRIVING THE PRICE UP ON YOU.
- NOW, 1,000, 1,000.
- WHOA!
- 1,000 ONCE, 1,000, ANYBODY? 1,000 TWICE...
- [groans and sighs]
IT'S TIME TO GO TO WORK.
YEAH.
- WAY OVER THERE, 1,000.
NOW 1,000. NOW 1,050. - BRING IT.
- NOW 1,100. - YEAH.
- [auctioneering] - BRING IT.
- NOW 1,200. 1,200.
- YEAH. - BRING IT.
- 1,250. 1,300.
- YEAH.
- BRING IT. - 1,350.
NOW 1,400. 1,400.
- YEAH.
- BRING IT. - 1,500.
NOW, 1,500. 1,500, 1,500, 1,500.
- NO. - WILL YOU GIVE 1,500?
ANYBODY ELSE IN AT 1,500?
NOW 1,500 ONCE, TWICE.
SOLD IT, LESA, RIGHT HERE. $1,450.
ALL YOURS, MY LADY.
[applause]
- WE'RE GOING TO FILL A HOUSE WITH ALL THAT FURNITURE.
I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE WHAT ELSE WE GOT.
I GOT MY BIG GIRL PANTIES ON TODAY.
- YOU GOT A GOOD ONE.
- WHERE THE HELL'S MY CAR?
WELL, I TOTALLY STRUCK OUT TODAY.
LOOKS LIKE IT'S BACK TO BEING ANNOYING.
IT WAS A REAL BAD DAY TODAY.
[groans] MAN, CAN'T BELIEVE IT.
- WE'RE BACK IN THE UNIT WE BOUGHT FOR $550.
- ALREADY RIGHT OFF THE BAT, WE GOT $200 ON THAT.
- THAT RIGHT THERE IS, WHAT, ANOTHER $50?
- THAT GUY STUFF IS GREAT,
BUT WE'RE HERE TO FIND SOME GIRLY THINGS.
- [exhales and coughs]
I CAN SMELL THIS ONE.
OLD AVON BOTTLES.
PROBABLY 40, 50 BUCKS.
- "MCDONALD BEANIES."
SEE IF THAT'S WHAT'S IN THERE, BUBBA MAN.
- MAYBE.
- HOLY CRAPOLA.
THIS IS 1999.
- GOT THE BAG THEY CAME IN.
THE BEANIE CRAZE CAME AND WENT.
I'D SAY 50 BUCKS FOR THOSE,
BUT IT DOES SUGGEST THIS PERSON COLLECTED.
- LOOK AT THESE DOLLS.
- 20 BUCKS A DOLL, PROBABLY.
AND LOOK AT THAT DRESS. - I KNOW.
- YOU GOT TO KNOW DRESSES, DOG. I'M A BUSINESS MAN.
YOU GOT TO KNOW STUFF FOR MEN AND WOMEN.
- [groans] GOLLY.
WHAT IS THIS? THIS IS SOME HEAVY STUFF.
- THE HELL IS THAT, RICKY?
- WELL, I WAS GOING TO SAY THAT MIGHT BE FOR HEMORRHOIDS,
BUT I DON'T KNOW.
THIS IS A SELF-ELECTROCUTION SET.
- [chuckles] HERE, LET ME SEE THIS.
- JUST PICK THAT UP. - GOD DANG.
- GOOD LORD.
- "WILL CAUSE SHOCK, BURN, OR DEATH."
SOME GREAT OPTIONS.
"THANKS FOR ORDERING YOUR STUFF FROM TESLA STUFF."
IT'S ONE OF THOSE...
- [clears throat]
- IT'S, LIKE--
[makes electronic buzzing sounds]
- THAT'S RIGHT. HEMORRHOIDS.
OR LIKE A PLASMA LAMP?
- NO, IT'S NOT A PLASMA LAMP.
LET'S PUT THIS IN THE BACK OF THE TRUCK.
- OKAY.
- WELL, IT'S NOT GIRLY, BUT IT'S DEFINITELY BIZARRE.
THIS MIGHT BE WORTH A SECOND LOOK.
- I BOUGHT A HOUSEHOLD UNIT FILLED WITH FURNITURE,
TOTES, AND BOXES.
- THAT CRAZY WOMAN BOUGHT THIS THING FOR 1,500 BUCKS.
- JERRY, CAN YOU HANG THIS OUTSIDE?
IT'S A LOT OF CASH,
BUT I THINK THIS UNIT WILL PAY OFF.
LET'S SEE. WE GOT THIS LITTLE LIGHT.
THAT WILL SELL FOR $10.
WE GOT THIS LITTLE LANTERN. MAYBE $5.
WE'VE GOT THIS GREAT GARDENING HOSE HOLDER.
THAT WILL GO FOR $25 RIGHT THERE.
THERE'S $200 WORTH OF PORCELAIN MASKS IN HERE.
COOL.
THESE KNICKKNACKS AREN'T GOING TO ADD UP TO $1,500.
I HOPE THIS FURNITURE SAVES ME.
DARK OAK, $200.
ANTIQUE DRESSER, $150.
I LOVE THIS BED. $400.
THIS PIECE-- $300.
LITTLE CURIO CABINET-- MAYBE $50.
ROLLTOP DESK-- I THINK I'D GET $75 FOR THAT.
DIDN'T QUITE MAKE A PROFIT.
BUT THE STORE'S FULL.
- WHAT? - THIS SIDE UP.
- "STAND UP."
OPENS HERE.
WHAT'S THAT?
- TURN IT AROUND.
[gasps]
HOLY [bleep].
WHAT IS THIS?
IT'S GOT A PLUG. LET'S PLUG IT IN.
OH, LOOK.
AND LOOK AT THEIR HEADS MOVE.
"HAVE NO FEAR,
ONE OF OUR BEAUTIFUL DIAMONDS WILL WIN HER."
I DON'T GET THIS.
- WHAT ELSE IS NEW?
- YEAH, I'M GOING TO HAVE TO GET THIS COWBOY THING CHECKED OUT.
CAREFUL.
BOY, AM I UP THE CREEK WITHOUT A PADDLE.
HE'S GOING TO FIND OUT WHAT IT IS.
- ♪ HE'S MOE PRIGOFF ♪
- I WAS WAY OFF ABOUT THIS PUMP.
AFTER SOME RESEARCH, IT TURNS OUT
IT'S A TRAIN WHISTLE.
LET ME SHOW YOU WHAT-- WHAT I CALLED YOU ABOUT.
- THAT'S WHAT WE WOULD CALL A HOOTER WHISTLE.
IT'S A SINGLE NOTE WHISTLE.
IT'S A NICE, HISTORICAL PIECE.
I WAS LOOKING AT THE DATE HERE,
AND BEST I CAN TELL,
IT LOOKS LIKE MARCH 23rd, 1850.
- 1850? I WAS OFF BY 100 YEARS.
- THE OLD TRAINS DID NOT HAVE AIR BRAKES
LIKE WE KNOW THEM TODAY.
AND SO, THE SIGNALS ARE VERY IMPORTANT.
ONE SHORT BLOW IS, "STOP." - OKAY.
- TWO SHORT BLOWS MEANS, "I'M MOVING FORWARD.
RELEASE BRAKES."
THREE SHORTS IS, "I'M MOVING BACKWARDS."
- GIVE ME AN APPRAISAL OF WHAT YOU THINK IT'S WORTH.
- WELL...
THIS IS OBVIOUSLY AN ORIGINAL WHISTLE,
IT'S GOT ORIGINAL WARE.
YOU KNOW, THEY AREN'T MAKING THESE THINGS ANYMORE,
AND THERE'S JUST A FINITE NUMBER OF THEM.
I FIGURE IT'D GO FOR AT LEAST $500.
- REALLY?
- OH, YEAH. 500 BUCKS.
RAIL FANS LOVE THESE THINGS, AND THEY'RE VERY COLLECTIBLE.
NOW, IF IT WORKS,
YOU COULD EVEN INCREASE THE VALUE FURTHER.
YOU COULD KICK IT UP TO MAYBE 1,000 BUCKS.
- REALLY?
BLOW THAT WHISTLE NOW.
OKAY, LET'S GET SOME WIND THROUGH THIS HOOTER.
[air hissing]
- ALL RIGHT, WE READY?
IT'S GOING TO BE LOUD. - I'M READY.
[whistle blows]
- WHOO.
- WHOA! - NOT TOO BAD, YES.
TOOTS PRETTY LOUD.
- THAT'S PRETTY-- I JUST DOUBLED MY MONEY.
YES!
WELL, I DID FIND AN ODDITY,
BUT THIS THING REALLY BLEW ME AWAY.
GIVE ME ONE MORE TOOT.
[whistle blows]
WHOO!
- LET ME GET THE DOOR FOR YOU.
- PLEASE DO. - [laughs]
I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THIS MECHANICAL COWBOY THING IS.
SO I MEET WITH AN EXPERT TO SEE, ONE, WHAT IT IS,
AND TWO, IF I'M BACKWARD ON A LOCKER.
THIS IS WHAT I WAS TALKING TO YOU ABOUT A LITTLE BIT.
SO IF YOU COULD PEEK AT THIS.
- NICE, OLD BOX. - YEAH.
- OH, YEAH. WHAT A NICE PIECE.
- NOW WATCH.
WATCH. LOOK AT THE GUY.
LOOK AT THE GUY ON THE SIDE.
LOOK AT IT. THERE'S ONE ON THAT SIDE.
WATCH, WATCH HIM.
THERE GOES-- OOH.
- WHAT THEY ACTUALLY USED THESE FOR,
THEY PUT THESE IN THEIR WINDOWS OF JEWELRY STORES,
AND I'M SURE THEY WOULD PUT SOME JEWELRY AROUND IT,
YOU KNOW, DISPLAY SOME OF THEIR FINER PIECES.
- SO, THEN THAT WOULD-- WHAT?
ATTRACT PEOPLE TO COME IN TO YOUR STORE?
- YES, DEFINITELY.
IT LOOKS LIKE A MID 1950s BARANGER ADVERTISING DISPLAY.
THEY WERE ONLY RENTED TO STORES.
THEY WEREN'T SOLD.
SO IT'S PRETTY RARE THAT YOU HAVE ONE OF THESE
COME INTO YOUR HANDS.
- SO THIS IS KIND OF, LIKE, UNIQUE?
- KIND OF UNIQUE? COME ON, LESA.
- REALLY, SERIOUSLY, WHAT WOULD YOU THINK IT'S WORTH?
- SINCE IT IS MID '50s,
AND YOU DO HAVE THE ORIGINAL BOX--
ADVERTISING MEMORABILIA'S PRETTY COLLECTIBLE NOWADAYS.
I'D SAY WHAT YOU HAVE...
- [whispers] PLEASE, LORD...
- IS AROUND...
ABOUT $8,500.
- ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
- NOT AT ALL.
- [laughs] - THIS STUFF IS REALLY--
- I WOULD HAVE NEVER EVEN GUESSED.
NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS.
- THANK YOU, BENNY. KEEP YOUR HAND OFF OF THAT.
[laughter] - YES.
- THANK GOD.
I GOT THE FURNITURE I WANTED.
WOW.
AND THIS MECHANICAL DISPLAY IS GOING TO MAKE ME A PROFIT.
I SO APPRECIATE IT. - IT WAS SO NICE TO SEE YOU.
- I GOT PRETTY LUCKY. THAT'S ALL I CAN SAY.
- MM-HMM.
CAN I GET SECURITY?
[laughter]
- SO I DID A LITTLE RESEARCH ON TESLA PRODUCTS.
AND IT LOOKS LIKE THIS THING COULD BE WORTH SOME MONEY.
- [sighs] SIX HOURS.
- THIS IS THE PLACE.
- YOU BETTER HOPE TO GOD THIS IS THE PLACE.
SIX HOURS ON THE ROAD.
I HOPE THEY DON'T BURN UP THAT HEMORRHOID PAD,
BECAUSE I'M GOING TO NEED THE DAMN THING
TO GET BACK TO TEXAS.
- KNOCK, KNOCK.
HELLO. BUBBA.
I CALLED YOU. - I'M RICKY.
DEAR LORD, I HOPE THIS WAS WORTH IT.
- IT'S A TESLA COIL NAMED AFTER ITS INVENTOR, NIKOLA TESLA.
AND BASICALLY, IT'S FOR PRODUCING
HIGH FREQUENCY, HIGH VOLTAGE SPARKS.
- OKAY.
- THERE'S NOT A WHOLE LOT OF GOOD, PRACTICAL PURPOSES
THESE DAYS FOR IT.
YOU GOT A CONTROL TRANSFORMER HERE.
IT APPLIES POWER TO THE NEON SIGN.
IT WILL GIVE UP TO 15,000 VOLTS OUTPUT.
- D'OH!
- SPARK GAP WILL DISCHARGE THE CAPACITORS
TO THIS PANCAKE COPPER COIL, AND THE POWER WILL BE
INDUCED IN THESE WINDINGS.
- UH...WHAT?
- THE TOROID GOES ON TOP, AND IT DISTRIBUTES THE SPARKS.
- HOW DO I PUT THIS POLITELY?
THE REASON I'M HERE IS
I REALLY WANT TO KNOW WHAT IT'S WORTH.
- WELL, BASED ON EVERYTHING THAT'S HERE...
IT'S IN THE BALLPARK OF AROUND $800.
- IT'S NOT BAD. - NOT BAD?
WE JUST SPENT HALF OF THAT ON DIESEL...
AND HEMORRHOID CREAM.
[laughs]
- WELL, YOU GUYS,
THERE'S A COIL I BUILT THAT WILL BLOW THIS ONE
TO SMITHEREENS.
- HOLY [bleep]. - GOOD LORD.
- ARE YOU KIDDING ME, DUDE?
- SEE, NOW THIS IS A TESLA COIL.
- IT'S LIKE THE GODZILLA TESLA COIL.
I HAVE A FEELING THIS IS GOING TO MAKE UP
FOR THE LONG-ASS DRIVE.
- I WOULD STAND OVER HERE ABOUT 20 FEET AWAY FROM IT.
- UH-OH.
DON'T HAVE TO TELL ME TWICE.
- I'M GOING TO GO 30 THEN IF YOU SAID 20.
- GOT TO STAND BACK A LITTLE FURTHER.
- HE'S BACKING UP.
- HE'S BACKING UP, SO I'M BACK--
[electricity crackles] WHAT THE--
[electricity crackling]
- OH, MY GOD!
- WE MADE OUR MONEY BACK,
WE GOT ALL THE GIRL STUFF WE NEEDED.
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT RICKY,
BUT SEEING THIS THING MADE IT ALL WORTH IT.
- I GUESS THIS TIME IT'S NOT ALL ABOUT THE MONEY.
- KEVIN, THAT WAS CRAZY.
BUT I FEEL BAD ABOUT OURS NOW.
IT'S GOT PENIS ENVY. - [laughs]
narrator: THE BURLESON WINNER WAS LESA LEWIS,
MAKING A BIBLICAL PROFIT OF OVER 8,000 BUCKS.
MOE PRIGOFF CHOO-CHOO-CHOOSED THE RIGHT UNIT,
MAKING $1,300 WITH HIS TRAIN WHISTLE.
RICKY AND BUBBA MADE $760 ON THEIR TESLA HEMORRHOID PAD,
WHILE VICTOR RJESNJANSKY WENT BACK TO THE DRAWING BOARD.
- [whistles]
HE WAS SHOOTING BIG LIGHTNING BOLTS,
AND HE SAID 16 FOOT AWAY WAS AS FAR AS IT GOES,
AND I WAS 35 FEET AND CLIMBING.
I DIDN'T WANT TO GET CLOSE TO THAT MO-FO.
WHOO!
THAT WILL BLOW YOUR DRESS UP.
WHO IS THIS GUY SHOOTING LIGHTNING BOLTS
OUT OF A PERFECTLY GOOD HEMORRHOID PAD?
[chuckles]
DAMN RIGHT, I WAS PISSED OFF
DRIVING TO THE OTHER SIDE OF INFINITY
FOR SOMETHING THAT'S WORTHLESS AS TITS ON A NUN.