1 00:00:07,007 --> 00:00:09,274 [ laughter ] 2 00:00:11,078 --> 00:00:12,244 [ screaming ] 3 00:00:14,281 --> 00:00:15,480 Let's just get this started. 4 00:00:15,482 --> 00:00:16,548 Are you [bleep] kidding me? 5 00:00:16,750 --> 00:00:17,882 Who's a good cat? 6 00:00:17,884 --> 00:00:20,252 [ laughter ] 7 00:00:23,824 --> 00:00:24,756 [ chuckles ] 8 00:00:24,759 --> 00:00:27,759 [ laughter ] 9 00:00:28,629 --> 00:00:30,695 Today we're joined by our dear friend and actor 10 00:00:30,697 --> 00:00:31,896 Justin long. Yeah. 11 00:00:31,898 --> 00:00:33,498 And we are about to compete head-to-head, 12 00:00:33,500 --> 00:00:35,167 Pitching new inventions to a focus group. 13 00:00:35,369 --> 00:00:36,701 The catch is, we have no idea 14 00:00:36,703 --> 00:00:37,970 What the product is until the moment 15 00:00:38,172 --> 00:00:39,838 That we reveal it. At the end, 16 00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:41,373 We'll ask them to vote for whose product is best. 17 00:00:41,575 --> 00:00:42,975 If the majority of the room 18 00:00:42,977 --> 00:00:45,444 Doesn't vote for your product, you lose. 19 00:00:45,646 --> 00:00:47,245 I lose? You're the new guy. 20 00:00:47,247 --> 00:00:49,447 -Ooh! -Oh! 21 00:00:49,450 --> 00:00:51,850 ♪♪ 22 00:00:51,852 --> 00:00:54,252 What we're doing here today, it's a focus testing. 23 00:00:54,454 --> 00:00:55,720 We're gonna show you some products 24 00:00:55,922 --> 00:00:57,122 That we're working on and backing 25 00:00:57,324 --> 00:00:59,124 Either financially or idea-wise. 26 00:00:59,326 --> 00:01:01,794 So this first product that we're gonna ask you to comment on... 27 00:01:01,996 --> 00:01:02,995 Okay. 28 00:01:03,197 --> 00:01:04,797 Murr: So justin has chosen this for q. 29 00:01:04,999 --> 00:01:07,265 Ladies and gentlemen, I present flagg... 30 00:01:07,467 --> 00:01:08,867 With two g's. 31 00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:10,803 Flagg. [ laughs ] 32 00:01:11,005 --> 00:01:14,272 Talk is cheap. With flagg, it doesn't have to be. 33 00:01:14,274 --> 00:01:17,209 Simply install flagg in any space you converse in, 34 00:01:17,411 --> 00:01:18,877 Begin talking, and watch. 35 00:01:19,079 --> 00:01:21,746 Flagg automatically lowers itself to half-mast 36 00:01:21,948 --> 00:01:24,349 If your conversation becomes heavy or uncomfortable. 37 00:01:24,551 --> 00:01:26,818 Justin is gonna be able to control flagg 38 00:01:26,821 --> 00:01:28,152 From under the table. 39 00:01:28,155 --> 00:01:29,354 Examples of words and phrases 40 00:01:29,556 --> 00:01:31,156 That may trigger flagg include... 41 00:01:31,358 --> 00:01:33,358 "lantern fly"... 42 00:01:33,560 --> 00:01:36,160 [ sal and murr laugh ] 43 00:01:36,163 --> 00:01:37,896 "legionnaires' disease"... 44 00:01:37,898 --> 00:01:40,432 Like, legionnaires. There we go. 45 00:01:40,634 --> 00:01:42,834 Uh, "in a better place," 46 00:01:42,837 --> 00:01:45,237 Unless you're talking about death. 47 00:01:45,439 --> 00:01:46,438 Then it's down there. 48 00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:48,573 [ sal and murr laugh ] 49 00:01:48,575 --> 00:01:52,644 Mental load, custody battle, climate change. 50 00:01:52,646 --> 00:01:54,579 Born on a factory farm. Oh, yeah. 51 00:01:54,581 --> 00:01:56,648 There it goes. [ laughter ] 52 00:01:56,850 --> 00:01:58,983 These are all social cues that it picks up on? 53 00:01:58,985 --> 00:02:00,719 Watch. Try saying something. 54 00:02:00,921 --> 00:02:03,055 Uh, my dog was sick. 55 00:02:03,057 --> 00:02:05,524 And now she's doing better, 56 00:02:05,726 --> 00:02:08,393 But unfortunately, I put her down. 57 00:02:08,395 --> 00:02:09,394 That's crazy. 58 00:02:09,596 --> 00:02:12,731 Can I be debbie downer here? 59 00:02:12,733 --> 00:02:15,667 I guess so. [ laughter ] 60 00:02:15,669 --> 00:02:17,736 If you're conversing with people, 61 00:02:17,938 --> 00:02:20,338 You know, all you have to do is look at a person's face 62 00:02:20,340 --> 00:02:22,340 And you know how they're feeling. [ flagg whirring ] 63 00:02:22,342 --> 00:02:24,342 Yeah, it doesn't like you right now. 64 00:02:24,544 --> 00:02:26,678 I'll tell you that much. [ laughter ] 65 00:02:26,680 --> 00:02:28,480 Is it just like -- like you speaking in 66 00:02:28,482 --> 00:02:29,548 A positive tone that makes it go? 67 00:02:29,750 --> 00:02:30,882 Well, let me ask you something. 68 00:02:30,885 --> 00:02:32,884 What was the last movie you saw that you liked? 69 00:02:32,887 --> 00:02:34,753 "big daddy." I love "big daddy." 70 00:02:34,955 --> 00:02:36,488 "big daddy" is a hilarious movie. 71 00:02:36,490 --> 00:02:37,689 Now, ma'am. 72 00:02:37,691 --> 00:02:39,291 One of my favorite movies? Yeah. 73 00:02:39,493 --> 00:02:41,626 [ laughter ] 74 00:02:41,628 --> 00:02:43,762 "bad boys: Right or die." 75 00:02:43,764 --> 00:02:45,297 Wow. "bad boys: Ride or die." 76 00:02:45,499 --> 00:02:47,565 I would not have guessed that. [ laughs ] 77 00:02:47,568 --> 00:02:51,570 One of her favorite movies is the latest "bad boys?" 78 00:02:51,772 --> 00:02:52,771 You know who look like? That was last one I think. 79 00:02:52,973 --> 00:02:54,172 You look like the guy from "accepted." 80 00:02:54,174 --> 00:02:55,774 Yeah. Is that the college one? 81 00:02:55,976 --> 00:02:57,109 Man: Yes. I saw that. I like it. 82 00:02:57,111 --> 00:02:58,176 He likes it. He likes it. Oh, there we go. 83 00:02:58,378 --> 00:02:59,644 Yeah. That's cool. 84 00:02:59,646 --> 00:03:01,179 Now I like this thing. Yes. 85 00:03:01,381 --> 00:03:02,180 [ laughter ] 86 00:03:02,382 --> 00:03:03,448 I have one more question. 87 00:03:03,450 --> 00:03:05,784 Is this -- this is electric or...? 88 00:03:05,986 --> 00:03:07,652 Yeah. This sucker's electrical. 89 00:03:07,654 --> 00:03:09,387 And I don't know how, but, you know, 90 00:03:09,389 --> 00:03:10,722 If it's going down, maybe red flag, if it's going up, 91 00:03:10,724 --> 00:03:12,056 Green flag instead of the american. 92 00:03:12,258 --> 00:03:13,792 The flag is. Interchangeable. 93 00:03:13,794 --> 00:03:16,394 [ laughter ] 94 00:03:16,596 --> 00:03:18,797 Why doesn't it like anything I say? 95 00:03:18,799 --> 00:03:21,933 Marcia, this would guide you, right, in conversation 96 00:03:21,936 --> 00:03:24,536 So you're not as depressing, you know, 97 00:03:24,738 --> 00:03:26,271 As we've come to know you to be. 98 00:03:26,473 --> 00:03:29,808 [ laughter ] 99 00:03:29,810 --> 00:03:31,209 Why don't you give you an opportunity 100 00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:32,877 To -- to present your product? 101 00:03:33,079 --> 00:03:34,679 Alright, justin. Here we go, buddy. 102 00:03:34,681 --> 00:03:36,881 Meet doggy door, the world's first 103 00:03:37,083 --> 00:03:39,283 Smart entryway for your best friend. 104 00:03:39,286 --> 00:03:42,821 Using advanced ai sensing, doggy instantly recognizes 105 00:03:42,823 --> 00:03:47,091 When your dog wants in or out and opens just for them. 106 00:03:47,093 --> 00:03:50,028 It keeps stray animals and unwanted guests outside 107 00:03:50,230 --> 00:03:53,965 While giving your dog vip access 24/7, 108 00:03:53,968 --> 00:03:57,302 Because your pet deserves technology as loyal as they are. 109 00:03:57,504 --> 00:04:00,238 Is it motion sensor? It works based on your 110 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:02,240 Animal's a chip in the collar. 111 00:04:02,442 --> 00:04:05,243 Okay. Let's say a bear eats your dog. 112 00:04:05,445 --> 00:04:07,512 Now does he have access straight into the house? 113 00:04:07,514 --> 00:04:09,447 He would have access until he defecated it out. 114 00:04:09,649 --> 00:04:11,649 Like, what if someone knew that you had this... 115 00:04:11,652 --> 00:04:14,586 Yeah. ...Say, a serial killer and killed your dog? 116 00:04:14,788 --> 00:04:16,054 Serial killers love dogs. 117 00:04:16,256 --> 00:04:17,856 I'm just gonna show them nola. 118 00:04:18,058 --> 00:04:19,591 -Oh! -Oh! 119 00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:20,792 Woman: She looks like my dog. 120 00:04:20,994 --> 00:04:22,794 Oh, she's so cute. 121 00:04:22,996 --> 00:04:24,796 So, you know, you know, the dangers of 122 00:04:24,998 --> 00:04:26,198 [blows raspberry] just a flap. 123 00:04:26,400 --> 00:04:28,733 So now, let's see how it works. 124 00:04:28,735 --> 00:04:30,535 Here we go. This is up. 125 00:04:30,737 --> 00:04:31,536 [ air hisses ] this is... 126 00:04:31,738 --> 00:04:33,538 Oh, my gosh! 127 00:04:33,540 --> 00:04:37,275 [ laughter ] 128 00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:39,878 Oh, no. Oh, no. 129 00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:41,145 It's a no for me. 130 00:04:41,147 --> 00:04:42,214 Man: You took his hat off. 131 00:04:42,416 --> 00:04:43,481 You -- you would avoid this scenario 132 00:04:43,683 --> 00:04:44,816 With proper training. 133 00:04:44,818 --> 00:04:46,618 Like, nola looks to be a little bit over... 134 00:04:46,820 --> 00:04:47,952 She's five pounds. 135 00:04:48,154 --> 00:04:49,353 "yeah, she'd be obliterated." 136 00:04:49,356 --> 00:04:50,955 She'd -- she'd be obliterated, I imagine. 137 00:04:51,157 --> 00:04:52,356 But -- but... 138 00:04:52,359 --> 00:04:54,026 [ laughter ] 139 00:04:54,228 --> 00:04:57,696 The bottom of the guillotine. 140 00:04:57,898 --> 00:04:59,831 Guillotine. She called it a guillotine. 141 00:04:59,833 --> 00:05:02,234 We don't call it a guillotine. It's a doggy door. 142 00:05:02,236 --> 00:05:04,636 I want you to notice how fast. [ air hissing ] 143 00:05:04,638 --> 00:05:07,305 So this will be... That's 200 psi's right there. 144 00:05:07,507 --> 00:05:09,307 [ laughter ] 145 00:05:09,509 --> 00:05:10,709 You asked about a serial killer? 146 00:05:10,911 --> 00:05:12,577 I sure did. 147 00:05:12,779 --> 00:05:14,045 You got 600 american horsepower coming down saying 148 00:05:14,048 --> 00:05:16,114 You're not coming in tonight. 149 00:05:16,116 --> 00:05:17,849 Yeah. [ laughter ] 150 00:05:18,051 --> 00:05:20,518 Can we come, like, with an automatic stop? 151 00:05:20,720 --> 00:05:22,120 Murr: "no, we cannot." you know how some elevators -- 152 00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:23,922 No, no. No. 153 00:05:23,924 --> 00:05:25,390 They'll sense. No, no. 154 00:05:25,592 --> 00:05:28,192 [ laughter ] 155 00:05:28,394 --> 00:05:32,997 You know, your arms in the way and it stops. 156 00:05:33,199 --> 00:05:36,067 No, marcia. [ laughter ] 157 00:05:36,070 --> 00:05:37,736 Marcia: You should have... 158 00:05:37,938 --> 00:05:39,737 Sorry. Sorry. 159 00:05:39,740 --> 00:05:41,406 Marcia's really throwing you off. 160 00:05:41,608 --> 00:05:43,741 Well, it's just a lot of negativity. 161 00:05:43,744 --> 00:05:46,678 [ laughter ] 162 00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:48,747 Murr: Alright, let's, uh, let's take the vote, guys. 163 00:05:48,949 --> 00:05:49,881 Q: We're going to take a vote. 164 00:05:49,883 --> 00:05:51,082 Just by show of hands, 165 00:05:51,085 --> 00:05:53,551 Who thinks that the doggie door is better? 166 00:05:53,553 --> 00:05:55,153 Murr: One, two. 167 00:05:55,155 --> 00:05:56,420 Two. Two. Justin wins. 168 00:05:56,423 --> 00:05:57,956 Despite marcia riding my balls. 169 00:05:57,958 --> 00:05:59,223 [ ding! ] 170 00:05:59,425 --> 00:06:00,892 [ laughter ] 171 00:06:00,894 --> 00:06:02,894 What we have -- we have, uh, two exciting products 172 00:06:03,096 --> 00:06:04,296 To show you right now. Woman: Let's do it. 173 00:06:04,298 --> 00:06:05,397 Here we go, bud. 174 00:06:06,633 --> 00:06:09,033 Oh. Sterry. 175 00:06:09,035 --> 00:06:11,636 A lot of men are at a point in their lives 176 00:06:11,838 --> 00:06:14,038 Where they no longer want to have children. 177 00:06:14,240 --> 00:06:16,040 It's a cute name for sterilization. 178 00:06:16,242 --> 00:06:17,842 [ laughter ] 179 00:06:17,844 --> 00:06:20,779 The option up until now was to go under the knife 180 00:06:20,981 --> 00:06:22,714 And get a vasectomy. Vasectomy. 181 00:06:22,716 --> 00:06:25,116 Vasectomy. But there's a better way. 182 00:06:25,119 --> 00:06:26,718 Introducing sterry. 183 00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:29,721 This is a low-level radiation device 184 00:06:29,723 --> 00:06:33,658 That's the size of a business card.= 185 00:06:33,660 --> 00:06:37,195 It has a range of up to 12 feet 186 00:06:37,197 --> 00:06:40,999 And can still be effective next to your nightstand or backpack. 187 00:06:41,201 --> 00:06:43,735 In combination with mountain dew... 188 00:06:43,737 --> 00:06:46,070 [ laughter ] 189 00:06:46,072 --> 00:06:49,874 Sterry will deplete your active sperm count 190 00:06:49,876 --> 00:06:52,276 In eight months or less. 191 00:06:52,278 --> 00:06:55,347 Go sterile with sterry fast, 192 00:06:55,549 --> 00:06:58,550 And avoid getting your penis tubes cut. 193 00:06:58,552 --> 00:07:00,552 [ laughter ] 194 00:07:00,554 --> 00:07:02,220 So, the card goes in your wallet. 195 00:07:02,222 --> 00:07:04,022 Okay? And then you're walking around. 196 00:07:04,224 --> 00:07:06,558 Now I'm the guy. I've had a few kids. 197 00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:08,626 I'm ready to get my life back. 198 00:07:08,828 --> 00:07:10,562 And -- is that an active prototype? 199 00:07:10,564 --> 00:07:12,430 Because my wife and I are trying to conceive. 200 00:07:12,632 --> 00:07:14,832 Is that an active prototype? It is an active prototype. 201 00:07:14,835 --> 00:07:16,234 Could you step back? 202 00:07:16,236 --> 00:07:17,769 Well, it's been on the table this whole time, 203 00:07:17,971 --> 00:07:20,438 To be honest. Could you please move 14 feet away? 204 00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:22,506 My wife and I are trying to conceive right now. 205 00:07:22,509 --> 00:07:24,642 I didn't realize you brought an active prototype. 206 00:07:24,644 --> 00:07:26,578 This takes eight months for a full depletion. 207 00:07:26,580 --> 00:07:30,048 So the radius is double the covid recommendations. 208 00:07:30,250 --> 00:07:34,519 12 feet? 12 feet? You're irradiating men's sperm. 209 00:07:34,721 --> 00:07:36,654 Can you -- what if you take the subway sperm? 210 00:07:36,856 --> 00:07:37,856 If you go to church on Sunday. 211 00:07:38,058 --> 00:07:39,391 You're irradiating the whole congregation. 212 00:07:39,593 --> 00:07:41,259 Sal: I could speak to all of these things, please. 213 00:07:41,261 --> 00:07:44,328 If you are around sterry for an hour, 214 00:07:44,330 --> 00:07:45,730 You are losing nothing. 215 00:07:45,732 --> 00:07:47,331 If you hang out with me all the time, like, 216 00:07:47,533 --> 00:07:48,666 You're my friend, we're inseparable, 217 00:07:48,868 --> 00:07:50,268 You're only gonna lose like half your sperm. 218 00:07:50,270 --> 00:07:52,604 [ laughter ] this is crazy. 219 00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:54,806 Murr, you're tingling. You feel a tingling. 220 00:07:55,008 --> 00:07:56,007 I feel like a tingling. 221 00:07:56,209 --> 00:07:57,209 That's sterry working. 222 00:07:57,411 --> 00:07:59,677 Then you get further away! 223 00:07:59,879 --> 00:08:00,678 Look -- 224 00:08:00,880 --> 00:08:02,346 Come on. 225 00:08:02,548 --> 00:08:04,348 I told you, don't bring that near me, man. 226 00:08:04,350 --> 00:08:06,218 I already told you. Relax. 227 00:08:06,420 --> 00:08:08,486 It's gonna take eight months for your whole bag to be depleted. 228 00:08:08,688 --> 00:08:11,089 [ laughter ] 229 00:08:11,091 --> 00:08:13,157 So you can show me that on the app? 230 00:08:13,359 --> 00:08:16,160 I can show you on the app the day my last sperm dies. 231 00:08:16,362 --> 00:08:18,430 [ laughter ] 232 00:08:18,432 --> 00:08:20,231 Shall we? Shall we move on? Alright, alright. 233 00:08:20,234 --> 00:08:22,100 Reset out there. Reset out there. 234 00:08:22,302 --> 00:08:25,236 Okay. Can you guys see this? 235 00:08:25,239 --> 00:08:27,505 You can see that? Yeah? Is that good? 236 00:08:27,507 --> 00:08:28,840 Okay. 237 00:08:28,842 --> 00:08:30,175 Justin: That's insane. 238 00:08:33,113 --> 00:08:36,182 Can you guys see this? You can see that? 239 00:08:36,384 --> 00:08:39,918 Yeah? Is it good? Okay, here we go. 240 00:08:40,120 --> 00:08:41,453 So, sal asked me to help him out with this a little bit. 241 00:08:41,655 --> 00:08:44,656 He gave you the controls? So I'm gonna man the controls 242 00:08:44,658 --> 00:08:45,924 When the time is right. Yes. 243 00:08:46,126 --> 00:08:49,728 So this is the self-driving stroller. 244 00:08:49,730 --> 00:08:52,798 Walk alongside your child instead of pushing behind 245 00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:54,132 Where you can't see them. 246 00:08:54,134 --> 00:08:56,001 Justin: That's insane. With peace of mind, 247 00:08:56,003 --> 00:08:58,604 Knowing that your little one is in the infallible hands 248 00:08:58,806 --> 00:09:00,872 Of an all-knowing computer. 249 00:09:00,875 --> 00:09:03,275 [ laughter ] 250 00:09:03,477 --> 00:09:06,011 You know, the problem with a stroller is that you're behind 251 00:09:06,213 --> 00:09:07,746 And you cannot see your child. 252 00:09:07,748 --> 00:09:11,217 Are they crying? Are they happy, sad, hungry, upset? 253 00:09:11,419 --> 00:09:13,085 You don't know. 254 00:09:13,087 --> 00:09:14,753 And you have parents that are okay with this? 255 00:09:14,755 --> 00:09:16,622 [ laughter ] 256 00:09:16,824 --> 00:09:20,292 Yeah, it has sensors on all sides making sure your child is 257 00:09:20,294 --> 00:09:21,427 Safe and protected. 258 00:09:21,629 --> 00:09:22,628 Now, what is it? Here? 259 00:09:23,030 --> 00:09:24,763 Oh. See? So... 260 00:09:24,965 --> 00:09:26,298 Q: Look at sal's face. 261 00:09:26,500 --> 00:09:29,701 The sensors will -- will protect it seamlessly 262 00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:30,969 From banging into anything. 263 00:09:30,971 --> 00:09:32,237 Watch. So -- 264 00:09:32,240 --> 00:09:33,772 Oh, well. 265 00:09:33,974 --> 00:09:35,507 Well, hold on, let me -- let me reset it. 266 00:09:35,709 --> 00:09:37,575 Let me reset. Let me reset it. 267 00:09:37,578 --> 00:09:38,910 Oh. 268 00:09:38,913 --> 00:09:40,378 [ laughter ] 269 00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:42,180 Maybe strap the baby in. 270 00:09:42,182 --> 00:09:43,982 Oh, hold on, hold on one second. 271 00:09:44,184 --> 00:09:46,452 Strap the baby in. Okay let me, let me just -- 272 00:09:46,454 --> 00:09:48,186 [ motor revs ] 273 00:09:48,188 --> 00:09:50,322 [ laughter ] 274 00:09:50,324 --> 00:09:51,923 You are vicious. 275 00:09:51,926 --> 00:09:53,659 So, what we want to show you 276 00:09:53,661 --> 00:09:55,661 Is that it does have sensors on all sides. 277 00:09:55,863 --> 00:09:58,596 This carriage will not crash into anything. 278 00:09:58,599 --> 00:10:00,266 [ laughter ] 279 00:10:00,468 --> 00:10:01,800 As a parent, could you benefit 280 00:10:01,802 --> 00:10:03,535 From something like this? 281 00:10:03,537 --> 00:10:05,537 I could see a parent that would very much appreciate it. 282 00:10:05,539 --> 00:10:07,072 Right? It's just -- 283 00:10:07,274 --> 00:10:09,207 [ laughter ] 284 00:10:09,409 --> 00:10:11,610 See, it did come back to me. I-I did command it. 285 00:10:11,812 --> 00:10:13,145 My friends would love it. 286 00:10:13,147 --> 00:10:15,414 The actual cradle... 287 00:10:18,085 --> 00:10:19,952 [ laughter ] 288 00:10:20,154 --> 00:10:21,820 I mean, you gotta have it, right? 289 00:10:22,022 --> 00:10:24,022 [ laughter ] 290 00:10:24,224 --> 00:10:25,824 By show of hands, how many of you think 291 00:10:25,826 --> 00:10:29,428 That edward's product is closer to coming to market than mine? 292 00:10:30,564 --> 00:10:32,164 One. 293 00:10:32,166 --> 00:10:33,899 Two. Two. 294 00:10:34,101 --> 00:10:35,834 Well, you just sold your futures. 295 00:10:35,836 --> 00:10:38,370 Well done. Yeah. 296 00:10:38,572 --> 00:10:40,772 Narrator: This just in, murr and q lost. 297 00:10:40,774 --> 00:10:44,376 So they'll be taking the long walk to the loser board. 298 00:10:44,578 --> 00:10:47,112 Today we're posing as customers at cafe aroma, 299 00:10:47,114 --> 00:10:49,782 And, uh-oh, a crime is about to occur. 300 00:10:51,919 --> 00:10:53,652 After this heinous crime. 301 00:10:53,854 --> 00:10:55,921 Witnesses will be asked to fill out an incident report. 302 00:10:55,923 --> 00:10:57,723 The catch is, our incident report 303 00:10:57,725 --> 00:10:59,124 Has been written by the other guys. 304 00:10:59,126 --> 00:11:01,059 At the end, the manager will give the other witness 305 00:11:01,261 --> 00:11:02,328 A gift card for their time. 306 00:11:02,530 --> 00:11:03,929 He'll also ask them if we deserve a gift card, 307 00:11:03,931 --> 00:11:06,198 Despite our report being so wildly inaccurate. 308 00:11:06,400 --> 00:11:08,266 If you don't get a gift card, you lose. 309 00:11:08,468 --> 00:11:09,801 Dude, your -- your dad stole my tip. 310 00:11:10,003 --> 00:11:10,970 I didn't see anything? 311 00:11:14,341 --> 00:11:19,678 Alright, q, you are about to witness a crime, my friend. 312 00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:22,247 The thief is one of our producers, christian esten. 313 00:11:23,617 --> 00:11:25,016 Christian: I'm stealing these tips! 314 00:11:25,019 --> 00:11:29,087 And there's nothing this, fat old man can do about it. 315 00:11:29,289 --> 00:11:30,488 Suck it, fat stuff! 316 00:11:30,490 --> 00:11:31,924 Sal: Oh my, god. 317 00:11:33,493 --> 00:11:36,428 Well, he stole your tips, but he called me fat twice. 318 00:11:36,430 --> 00:11:38,931 [ laughter ] 319 00:11:41,235 --> 00:11:42,234 I mean, I've been losing weight. 320 00:11:42,436 --> 00:11:44,770 [ laughter ] 321 00:11:44,972 --> 00:11:47,639 Sal: Alright, szeluga. Hey, what happened? 322 00:11:47,841 --> 00:11:49,441 Some guy just stole, uh... 323 00:11:50,177 --> 00:11:51,509 ...All your tips and then ran out. 324 00:11:51,511 --> 00:11:53,912 John: Would you mind filling out an incident report? 325 00:11:53,914 --> 00:11:55,047 How do you do an incident report? 326 00:11:55,249 --> 00:11:56,314 I'll do it for you. 327 00:11:56,516 --> 00:11:57,515 She's in, she's in. Okay. Here we go. 328 00:11:57,717 --> 00:11:58,850 All right. 329 00:11:58,852 --> 00:12:00,586 His whole report is filled out already. 330 00:12:00,588 --> 00:12:01,920 We'll see how these incident reports 331 00:12:01,922 --> 00:12:03,054 Stack up against each other. 332 00:12:03,057 --> 00:12:05,057 Fat twice and old once. 333 00:12:05,259 --> 00:12:06,458 You're not that old and fat. 334 00:12:06,460 --> 00:12:08,660 [ laughter ] 335 00:12:08,662 --> 00:12:09,928 I want to make sure I can read everything. 336 00:12:10,130 --> 00:12:11,263 I want to make sure there's no discrepancies. 337 00:12:11,465 --> 00:12:12,530 Is that okay if I... Yeah, sure. 338 00:12:12,732 --> 00:12:13,865 ...Go over these with you? Sure. 339 00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:16,334 Uh, stranger came in and threatened to harm, 340 00:12:16,336 --> 00:12:18,136 And he ran out with the whole tip jar. 341 00:12:18,138 --> 00:12:20,472 John: You said you made direct eye contact 342 00:12:20,674 --> 00:12:22,407 And dared him to do something. 343 00:12:22,410 --> 00:12:24,409 The bitch backed down and went for the tip jar? 344 00:12:24,412 --> 00:12:26,544 Yeah. 345 00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:29,080 Yeah. [ laughter ] 346 00:12:29,083 --> 00:12:30,416 You said as soon as he exited, 347 00:12:30,618 --> 00:12:34,019 He lifted off into the air on a jetpack or pogo stick? 348 00:12:35,889 --> 00:12:37,222 [ laughter ] 349 00:12:37,424 --> 00:12:39,224 But I didn't see where it went. 350 00:12:39,226 --> 00:12:41,493 I just -- he ran out the door, and then he was gone. 351 00:12:41,695 --> 00:12:44,696 [ laughter ] 352 00:12:44,898 --> 00:12:47,232 You had just put $50 in the tip jar. 353 00:12:47,234 --> 00:12:49,167 Yeah. Because that's how you roll. 354 00:12:49,169 --> 00:12:50,902 [ laughter ] 355 00:12:51,104 --> 00:12:52,438 You're asking if you can get that back. 356 00:12:54,708 --> 00:12:56,642 Walk away, let her talk. Yeah, yeah. 357 00:12:56,844 --> 00:12:58,776 I think he took the jetpack up there. 358 00:12:58,779 --> 00:13:00,778 [ laughs ] 359 00:13:00,781 --> 00:13:03,015 The guy called him a name when he took the tip jar or...? 360 00:13:05,585 --> 00:13:06,784 She said fat [bleep]. 361 00:13:06,787 --> 00:13:07,853 She should he called you a fat [bleep]. 362 00:13:07,855 --> 00:13:09,655 She should he called you a fat [bleep]. 363 00:13:09,857 --> 00:13:11,657 [ laughs ] 364 00:13:11,659 --> 00:13:13,525 I'd like to give you a gift card 365 00:13:13,527 --> 00:13:14,993 Or something for your troubles. 366 00:13:15,195 --> 00:13:16,762 You think I should give him a gift card as well? 367 00:13:21,068 --> 00:13:22,000 She said you shouldn't have to give him anything. 368 00:13:22,202 --> 00:13:23,068 That's a loss, buddy. 369 00:13:23,270 --> 00:13:24,736 You lost, you fat [bleep]. 370 00:13:24,738 --> 00:13:26,204 [ laughter ] 371 00:13:26,206 --> 00:13:27,606 [ buzzer ] 372 00:13:29,009 --> 00:13:30,109 Sal: Whoa, boy! 373 00:13:31,611 --> 00:13:32,878 This is mine. 374 00:13:33,080 --> 00:13:34,212 Whoa! 375 00:13:34,214 --> 00:13:35,347 Suck it, lady! 376 00:13:35,549 --> 00:13:38,416 [ laughter ] 377 00:13:38,418 --> 00:13:41,553 ♪♪ 378 00:13:41,555 --> 00:13:43,188 He manhandled you. 379 00:13:44,825 --> 00:13:47,225 Yeah, I'm okay, and I'm not a lady. 380 00:13:47,227 --> 00:13:48,626 [ laughter ] 381 00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:50,495 Why would he think that? I don't get it. 382 00:13:50,498 --> 00:13:52,564 [ laughter ] 383 00:13:52,566 --> 00:13:54,165 I can't get over... 384 00:13:54,168 --> 00:13:55,500 Send in szeluga. Send in szeluga 385 00:13:55,503 --> 00:13:57,569 It was so unnecessary. 386 00:13:57,571 --> 00:13:59,637 What happened? He put -- this guy came in, 387 00:13:59,839 --> 00:14:01,506 He misread me as a lady. 388 00:14:01,509 --> 00:14:03,108 And then -- [ laughter ] 389 00:14:03,310 --> 00:14:04,976 And then took the tip jar and ran. 390 00:14:05,178 --> 00:14:08,446 He's only upset about being called the lady. 391 00:14:08,448 --> 00:14:10,248 Sex? Male. 392 00:14:10,450 --> 00:14:13,451 [ laughter ] 393 00:14:13,453 --> 00:14:14,986 Can I just go over this with you two, 394 00:14:15,188 --> 00:14:16,988 Make sure we're on the same page? 395 00:14:16,990 --> 00:14:19,391 You said pretty sure the thief was carrying a bazooka? 396 00:14:19,593 --> 00:14:20,792 [ laughter ] 397 00:14:20,794 --> 00:14:23,795 He -- he -- you saw that, right? 398 00:14:23,797 --> 00:14:25,397 I didn't see it. You didn't see it? 399 00:14:25,399 --> 00:14:26,732 He had it, like, under his... I know he had a hat and glasses. 400 00:14:26,734 --> 00:14:28,333 He had the hat, what I imagined 401 00:14:28,335 --> 00:14:30,068 To be a bazooka of some kind. 402 00:14:30,070 --> 00:14:32,670 I didn't notice, but it's possible. 403 00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:35,941 You wrote, "my underwear sucked itself inside me 404 00:14:35,943 --> 00:14:38,610 At the worst time and prevented me from intervening." 405 00:14:38,612 --> 00:14:40,879 [ laughter ] 406 00:14:41,081 --> 00:14:42,948 It was an involuntary reaction, 407 00:14:42,950 --> 00:14:47,285 But it seemed as if my underwear did suck up into my own cavity 408 00:14:47,287 --> 00:14:49,087 From fear in that moment. 409 00:14:49,089 --> 00:14:51,289 [ laughter ] 410 00:14:51,491 --> 00:14:53,024 And you just wrote under comments, 411 00:14:53,226 --> 00:14:55,327 You said the kid stole your toupee. 412 00:14:56,896 --> 00:14:58,163 [ laughter ] 413 00:14:58,365 --> 00:15:01,900 I entered the store with his hair 414 00:15:02,102 --> 00:15:06,572 And he grabbed the tip jar, shoved me, misgendered me, 415 00:15:06,774 --> 00:15:09,707 Took my toupee and ran out. 416 00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:11,109 You saw it, right? 417 00:15:11,111 --> 00:15:12,110 Oh, I didn't see the hair. 418 00:15:12,112 --> 00:15:13,911 I had a fantastic toupee, 419 00:15:13,914 --> 00:15:15,781 Which probably explains why he thought I was a lady. 420 00:15:15,983 --> 00:15:18,450 Okay. [ laughter ] 421 00:15:18,652 --> 00:15:20,385 Okay. Yeah, let me... 422 00:15:20,387 --> 00:15:22,520 Um, thank you. 423 00:15:22,722 --> 00:15:24,322 I'd like to give you a gift card for helping us out today. 424 00:15:24,524 --> 00:15:26,792 If you were me, would you give him a gift card also? 425 00:15:30,264 --> 00:15:31,930 Ah! Ah! 426 00:15:32,132 --> 00:15:34,199 Murr, he said yes. 427 00:15:34,201 --> 00:15:35,733 I ain't no lady. 428 00:15:35,735 --> 00:15:37,669 [ ding! ] 429 00:15:38,405 --> 00:15:40,472 Alright, boys. Murr: Alright, sal v. 430 00:15:40,674 --> 00:15:42,340 Sal, you know, we got a buddy on set today, right? 431 00:15:42,342 --> 00:15:44,610 Yes. You brought teddy swims to set, 432 00:15:44,812 --> 00:15:46,211 And now we're going to set them loose on you. 433 00:15:46,413 --> 00:15:47,345 What do you think about that? 434 00:15:47,547 --> 00:15:49,614 He looks the part. [ laughter ] 435 00:15:49,617 --> 00:15:51,883 Murr: Alright, here we go, sal. 436 00:15:51,885 --> 00:15:53,618 Uh-oh. 437 00:15:53,621 --> 00:15:56,954 Teddy's about to steal that tip jar. 438 00:15:56,957 --> 00:15:57,955 Uh-oh. 439 00:15:57,958 --> 00:15:59,757 I'm taking this with me. 440 00:15:59,759 --> 00:16:01,359 [bleep] you gonna do about it? 441 00:16:01,361 --> 00:16:02,327 Murr: Uh-oh, uh-oh. 442 00:16:04,897 --> 00:16:07,165 Q: Uh-oh. Murr: Teddy's about to steal that tip jar. 443 00:16:07,367 --> 00:16:08,433 I'm taking this with me. 444 00:16:08,635 --> 00:16:09,967 [bleep] you gonna do about it? 445 00:16:09,970 --> 00:16:11,369 Q: Oh, this guy's invested. 446 00:16:11,371 --> 00:16:12,504 You smell like a bitch. 447 00:16:12,706 --> 00:16:13,905 What is that? Coco chanel? No, it's -- 448 00:16:14,107 --> 00:16:15,573 Come her, sugar. 449 00:16:15,575 --> 00:16:18,176 [ laughter ] 450 00:16:18,378 --> 00:16:20,378 Murr: This guy in the orange shirt has witnessed the whole scene. 451 00:16:20,380 --> 00:16:21,913 Let's send out the manager. 452 00:16:21,915 --> 00:16:23,849 Would you mind filling out an incident report real quick? 453 00:16:23,851 --> 00:16:25,484 Alright, this guy's in. 454 00:16:27,054 --> 00:16:28,320 Thank you. 455 00:16:28,522 --> 00:16:30,321 I just want to make sure there's no discrepancies. 456 00:16:30,324 --> 00:16:33,859 Uh, you said a guy walked in and took the tip jar and some chips, 457 00:16:34,061 --> 00:16:35,660 Which is basically what you said also, right? 458 00:16:35,663 --> 00:16:37,395 Yeah, pretty much. Yeah. 459 00:16:37,597 --> 00:16:39,665 You said suspect moved hurkle-durkle to the register 460 00:16:39,867 --> 00:16:42,734 And ran roughshod all over the tip jar. 461 00:16:42,736 --> 00:16:45,603 Murr: Hurkle-durkle? [ laughter ] 462 00:16:45,605 --> 00:16:47,272 John: I'm sorry. I never heard that saying. 463 00:16:47,274 --> 00:16:48,307 Hurkle-durkle? Yeah. 464 00:16:49,943 --> 00:16:52,810 Uh, you wrote, "I was boned up and ready to deliver justice, 465 00:16:53,012 --> 00:16:56,214 But the other witness seemed puss." 466 00:16:56,416 --> 00:16:58,684 Me? [ laughter ] 467 00:16:58,886 --> 00:17:00,285 I didn't think you were gonna read it out loud. 468 00:17:00,287 --> 00:17:02,954 [ laughter ] 469 00:17:02,956 --> 00:17:04,422 Yeah, he said other witness seemed puss. 470 00:17:04,624 --> 00:17:06,357 He definitely crapped his thumb." 471 00:17:06,360 --> 00:17:07,825 That's an expression I've heard. 472 00:17:08,027 --> 00:17:10,428 [ laughter ] 473 00:17:10,430 --> 00:17:12,698 Additional comments you wrote, "I was in here last week 474 00:17:12,900 --> 00:17:14,766 And this didn't happen. 475 00:17:14,968 --> 00:17:19,170 My father is a wealthy jamaican business-mon, if that matters." 476 00:17:19,372 --> 00:17:20,972 [ laughter ] 477 00:17:21,174 --> 00:17:23,374 Murr: My dad's a mon. Business-mon. 478 00:17:23,377 --> 00:17:26,111 Yeah, he's a business-mon. 479 00:17:26,113 --> 00:17:27,946 He trades stocks and things. 480 00:17:30,717 --> 00:17:33,118 [ laughter ] 481 00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:35,120 I'd like to give you a gift card. 482 00:17:35,322 --> 00:17:36,621 Should I give him a gift card also? 483 00:17:37,725 --> 00:17:38,924 Okay. Murr: Ah! 484 00:17:39,126 --> 00:17:40,992 Q: Sal, he says give it to you. You won! 485 00:17:40,994 --> 00:17:43,661 What a nice guy. Yeah. What a nice guy. 486 00:17:43,663 --> 00:17:44,596 That's my dude right there. 487 00:17:44,798 --> 00:17:47,999 [ ding! ] [ laughter ] 488 00:17:48,001 --> 00:17:50,201 Narrator: The reports are in, and it looks like 489 00:17:50,403 --> 00:17:53,538 Q is tonight's big loser. 490 00:17:53,540 --> 00:17:55,006 Q has lost, so today we are at 491 00:17:55,008 --> 00:17:56,874 Union square park for his punishment. 492 00:17:57,076 --> 00:17:58,744 Q, you're not much of an app guy we find, 493 00:17:58,946 --> 00:18:01,212 And so we feel you have been missing out on a lot 494 00:18:01,414 --> 00:18:02,547 Of interesting apps. Okay, yeah. 495 00:18:02,749 --> 00:18:04,549 So we decided to take the initiative 496 00:18:04,551 --> 00:18:08,686 And sign you up for some really great interactive apps 497 00:18:08,688 --> 00:18:11,088 That are going to be interacting with you a lot. 498 00:18:11,091 --> 00:18:12,624 The punishment doesn't end 499 00:18:12,826 --> 00:18:13,959 Until you get someone to sign up for one of these 500 00:18:14,161 --> 00:18:16,294 Awful, I mean, interactive... 501 00:18:16,496 --> 00:18:17,895 Interactive, interactive. Wait, what? 502 00:18:18,097 --> 00:18:19,965 ...Apps, yes. 503 00:18:19,967 --> 00:18:21,899 Okay, buddy, we are ready. So... 504 00:18:21,901 --> 00:18:23,100 You know what? 505 00:18:23,103 --> 00:18:25,436 A part of me is kind of really excited 506 00:18:25,439 --> 00:18:27,238 To see what apps you guys came up with, 507 00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:28,573 But another part of me realizes it's me 508 00:18:28,575 --> 00:18:30,108 That's got to endure them. 509 00:18:30,310 --> 00:18:31,776 This app is my favorite one, buddy. 510 00:18:31,779 --> 00:18:34,379 You'll know it when it happens to you. 511 00:18:34,581 --> 00:18:37,114 Excuse me, do you know where washington square park is? 512 00:18:37,117 --> 00:18:40,185 Yeah. Okay, let's cue the app. 513 00:18:40,387 --> 00:18:41,853 And you think that that -- oh, god. No. 514 00:18:41,855 --> 00:18:43,188 Tackle! 515 00:18:43,390 --> 00:18:45,991 [ laughter ] 516 00:18:45,993 --> 00:18:47,459 Oh, he got me. You got me. You get tackled. 517 00:18:47,661 --> 00:18:49,727 Man: Five stars, right? Five stars. 518 00:18:49,729 --> 00:18:51,396 Okay. Alright. 519 00:18:51,398 --> 00:18:53,130 I got another guy in 14 tackle. 520 00:18:53,133 --> 00:18:54,599 [ laughter ] 521 00:18:54,601 --> 00:18:55,667 Tackled! 522 00:18:55,869 --> 00:18:58,470 I got you. Got five stars. Five stars! 523 00:18:58,672 --> 00:19:00,872 So I'm on that app tackle. Oh, really? 524 00:19:00,874 --> 00:19:02,273 Yeah. You heard of it? 525 00:19:02,275 --> 00:19:04,475 You put it on, and at any minute, 526 00:19:04,478 --> 00:19:06,011 Somebody could come over and tackle you. 527 00:19:06,213 --> 00:19:07,745 Alright. You want to try it? 528 00:19:07,947 --> 00:19:09,014 Dude, look, look. 529 00:19:09,216 --> 00:19:10,882 I get a $5 gift certificate if you go off my -- 530 00:19:11,084 --> 00:19:12,950 Murr: Dude. [indistinct] 531 00:19:12,952 --> 00:19:14,820 Think about the joy. Like, anybody at any time. 532 00:19:17,090 --> 00:19:18,890 You don't want to get tackled at any given moment? 533 00:19:19,092 --> 00:19:22,027 Murr: Send in the app. Here it comes. 534 00:19:22,029 --> 00:19:23,961 On the park... 535 00:19:24,163 --> 00:19:25,763 Oh. Uh, alright. 536 00:19:25,965 --> 00:19:27,565 Get down. 537 00:19:27,567 --> 00:19:29,967 [ laughter ] 538 00:19:30,169 --> 00:19:31,302 This is good. 539 00:19:31,504 --> 00:19:33,104 Sal: He's getting hog-tied. 540 00:19:33,106 --> 00:19:35,440 [ laughter ] 541 00:19:35,642 --> 00:19:36,641 Give me five stars. 542 00:19:36,843 --> 00:19:38,443 Q: You're gonna get five stars, I promise. 543 00:19:38,445 --> 00:19:40,778 [ laughter ] 544 00:19:40,780 --> 00:19:42,447 Murr: "it's a hot new app called lassoed." 545 00:19:42,449 --> 00:19:43,915 Oh, my god. 546 00:19:43,917 --> 00:19:45,583 I didn't know they were gonna leave me the rope. 547 00:19:45,585 --> 00:19:48,019 I thought they just lassoed you and, like, did it, man. 548 00:19:49,522 --> 00:19:51,589 Have you been on lassoed yet? 549 00:19:51,591 --> 00:19:54,659 You haven't been lassoed? You set your location on. 550 00:19:54,661 --> 00:19:57,194 You select a slot, and at some point during the day, 551 00:19:57,197 --> 00:19:59,698 They come out and they lasso you just for fun. 552 00:20:01,068 --> 00:20:02,400 Download it. 553 00:20:02,602 --> 00:20:05,670 [ laughter ] 554 00:20:05,872 --> 00:20:07,004 I'm a little confused. 555 00:20:07,006 --> 00:20:08,339 You don't want to be hogtied by a woman 556 00:20:08,341 --> 00:20:09,741 Dressed like a cowgirl? 557 00:20:09,943 --> 00:20:12,009 [ laughter ] 558 00:20:12,011 --> 00:20:13,211 I don't know if you saw what happened. 559 00:20:13,413 --> 00:20:14,513 Did you see what happened over here, bud? 560 00:20:15,482 --> 00:20:17,148 That's an app called lassoed. 561 00:20:17,150 --> 00:20:18,750 Is this really happening? 562 00:20:18,952 --> 00:20:21,486 Are we going to download lassoed together and do it? 563 00:20:21,688 --> 00:20:22,888 No? 564 00:20:24,091 --> 00:20:25,623 Murr: [ laughs ] 565 00:20:25,825 --> 00:20:27,158 Q, just look left and right and say, 566 00:20:27,360 --> 00:20:29,294 Are my best friends. 567 00:20:29,296 --> 00:20:31,829 [ laughter ] 568 00:20:31,831 --> 00:20:33,564 You guys are my best friends. 569 00:20:33,567 --> 00:20:35,366 [ laughter ] 570 00:20:35,368 --> 00:20:37,034 You say it. 571 00:20:37,036 --> 00:20:40,305 [ laughter ] 572 00:20:40,307 --> 00:20:43,708 Sal: I love that they walk in the opposite directions. 573 00:20:43,710 --> 00:20:46,444 You are untenable. 574 00:20:46,446 --> 00:20:48,646 Are you desperate brian? Yeah. 575 00:20:48,648 --> 00:20:50,982 I would love to do a session now, if you're okay. 576 00:20:50,984 --> 00:20:52,383 Yeah, I can do a session. 577 00:20:52,585 --> 00:20:53,918 Thank you so much. Yeah. What do you got? 578 00:20:53,921 --> 00:20:57,122 Q, this is a wellness app that matches men for intimate, 579 00:20:57,124 --> 00:20:59,591 One-on-one consensual, sensual, groaning sessions. 580 00:20:59,793 --> 00:21:01,392 [ laughs ] 581 00:21:01,594 --> 00:21:02,928 [ groans ] 582 00:21:04,464 --> 00:21:07,132 Are you gonna...? 583 00:21:07,134 --> 00:21:09,601 [ groans ] 584 00:21:11,637 --> 00:21:14,638 Sal: Q, this is a wellness app that matches men for intimate, 585 00:21:14,641 --> 00:21:17,909 One-on-one consensual, sensual, groaning sessions. [ laughs ] 586 00:21:17,911 --> 00:21:21,379 [ groans ] 587 00:21:21,381 --> 00:21:23,181 Are you gonna...? 588 00:21:23,183 --> 00:21:24,448 I'm good, I'm good. I'm getting into it. 589 00:21:24,450 --> 00:21:27,251 Sorry, sorry. [ groaning ] 590 00:21:27,453 --> 00:21:29,387 Do you consent to holding hands? 591 00:21:29,389 --> 00:21:31,055 Yeah, I consent to holding hands. 592 00:21:31,257 --> 00:21:33,257 Sal: Sustained eye contact, please. 593 00:21:33,259 --> 00:21:36,260 [ both groaning ] 594 00:21:36,462 --> 00:21:40,598 [ groaning intensifies ] 595 00:21:40,800 --> 00:21:42,534 You sound like you're slobbering. 596 00:21:42,736 --> 00:21:44,135 Oh, I like it sloppy. Is this helping? 597 00:21:44,137 --> 00:21:45,403 Is this working for you? It's very helpful. 598 00:21:45,405 --> 00:21:47,338 [ groaning ] 599 00:21:47,341 --> 00:21:50,674 [ both groaning ] 600 00:21:50,677 --> 00:21:54,478 [ groaning intensifies ] 601 00:21:54,680 --> 00:21:57,148 [ laughter ] 602 00:21:57,350 --> 00:21:58,682 I can't help but feed them, too. 603 00:21:58,685 --> 00:21:59,751 I'm the -- I'm the same way. 604 00:21:59,753 --> 00:22:00,752 Alright, here comes our friend, 605 00:22:00,754 --> 00:22:02,420 Comedian rachel feinstein. 606 00:22:02,422 --> 00:22:03,888 Hi. I'm sorry to bother you. 607 00:22:03,890 --> 00:22:06,358 Are you not in any way a man 69? 608 00:22:06,560 --> 00:22:08,159 I -- I am, yes. 609 00:22:08,361 --> 00:22:09,961 Okay. I'm actually here from the app. 610 00:22:10,163 --> 00:22:12,230 It's flawed. Yeah. Oh, okay. 611 00:22:12,432 --> 00:22:14,098 Flawed. Yeah. If you don't, I would... 612 00:22:14,300 --> 00:22:15,967 [ laughter ] 613 00:22:15,969 --> 00:22:18,036 I guess we'll start with your smell. 614 00:22:18,238 --> 00:22:19,637 Okay. 615 00:22:19,639 --> 00:22:21,505 Your mom called it a threat to the atmosphere 616 00:22:21,707 --> 00:22:24,508 And asked, "aren't you too wealthy to smell this bad?" 617 00:22:24,510 --> 00:22:26,110 [ laughter ] 618 00:22:26,312 --> 00:22:28,045 This is the app flaws. Have you heard about this thing? 619 00:22:28,048 --> 00:22:29,180 No. 620 00:22:29,382 --> 00:22:31,049 Your friends put in your -- your flaws, 621 00:22:31,251 --> 00:22:33,184 And then rachel comes and tells you all the complaints 622 00:22:33,386 --> 00:22:34,986 That your friends had about you. 623 00:22:34,988 --> 00:22:35,987 Really? Yeah. It's called flaws. 624 00:22:35,989 --> 00:22:37,521 Yeah. 625 00:22:37,523 --> 00:22:38,590 Let's get into some more. 626 00:22:38,792 --> 00:22:40,324 This one was anonymous. 627 00:22:40,526 --> 00:22:41,659 It just says you look like silent bob 628 00:22:41,661 --> 00:22:44,061 If he moved to vermont. 629 00:22:44,064 --> 00:22:46,197 Okay, alright. It's not that helpful. 630 00:22:46,399 --> 00:22:48,666 Shea says you pretend to go to the gym, 631 00:22:48,668 --> 00:22:51,603 But she doesn't believe you. 632 00:22:51,805 --> 00:22:55,673 "you wear smock tops to cover your shapeless body, 633 00:22:55,875 --> 00:22:58,142 But no one's buying it." 634 00:22:58,344 --> 00:22:59,611 I mean... 635 00:22:59,813 --> 00:23:02,614 Mega manduke said you were going to reschedule your staff's 636 00:23:02,816 --> 00:23:05,216 Pool party and then never did. 637 00:23:05,218 --> 00:23:06,951 [ laughter ] 638 00:23:06,953 --> 00:23:08,886 Jeez. Oh, your dad? Sorry. Your dad. 639 00:23:08,888 --> 00:23:09,954 My dad's here. Yes. 640 00:23:09,956 --> 00:23:11,489 He said, " he's disappointed with 641 00:23:11,491 --> 00:23:13,357 The man you've become. 642 00:23:13,559 --> 00:23:14,358 He... 643 00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:16,894 [ laughter ] 644 00:23:17,096 --> 00:23:20,097 He put the word man in quotes. 645 00:23:20,100 --> 00:23:22,566 I've got a lot to work on, apparently. 646 00:23:22,568 --> 00:23:24,702 Oh, your aunt said you're a bit of a pussy, if that helps. 647 00:23:24,704 --> 00:23:27,305 I'm a pussy. My aunt said that. 648 00:23:27,307 --> 00:23:30,308 Okay, so there's all your -- your flaws. 649 00:23:30,310 --> 00:23:31,509 Thank you. Thank you, rachel. 650 00:23:31,511 --> 00:23:32,910 Again, five stars. Five stars, five stars. 651 00:23:33,112 --> 00:23:34,445 Good job, rachel. 652 00:23:34,448 --> 00:23:35,713 Well, if you want to take a picture 653 00:23:35,715 --> 00:23:37,048 Of the qr code so you have it. 654 00:23:37,050 --> 00:23:39,583 Sal: Oh. Whoa whoa, whoa. He's taking a picture. 655 00:23:39,585 --> 00:23:42,186 I mean, yeah, you just do that. 656 00:23:42,188 --> 00:23:44,388 And then -- and then there you go. 657 00:23:44,390 --> 00:23:45,857 Alright. 658 00:23:45,859 --> 00:23:47,792 This is going to change your life. 659 00:23:47,994 --> 00:23:49,461 Wow. After all that? 660 00:23:49,663 --> 00:23:51,595 You got it. Good job, buddy. 661 00:23:51,597 --> 00:23:52,530 Ah, yeah. 662 00:23:52,732 --> 00:23:53,931 You know, it would have been good. 663 00:23:54,133 --> 00:23:55,333 I could use I could use a sapporo now type thing. 664 00:23:55,335 --> 00:23:56,901 You know what I mean? That'd be great. 665 00:23:57,804 --> 00:23:59,003 Oh, shit. Here we go. 666 00:23:59,005 --> 00:24:00,271 Tackled! 667 00:24:00,473 --> 00:24:01,339 [ laughter ] 668 00:24:01,541 --> 00:24:02,640 Murr: Tackled.