1 00:00:27,440 --> 00:00:29,570 Liam Foxwell, welcome. 2 00:00:29,580 --> 00:00:30,890 Thank you. 3 00:00:30,900 --> 00:00:32,410 OK, little speech time. 4 00:00:32,470 --> 00:00:35,140 I've mentioned this to everyone about their appraisals, 5 00:00:35,270 --> 00:00:38,900 and I just want you to know that this isn't a witch-hunt for the deadwood. 6 00:00:38,960 --> 00:00:40,540 It is much more of a... 7 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:44,000 treasure hunt for the gold? 8 00:00:44,860 --> 00:00:46,180 Shit sinks. 9 00:00:46,560 --> 00:00:47,970 But also, cream floats. 10 00:00:48,090 --> 00:00:49,730 Yes, yes, I see that. 11 00:00:49,780 --> 00:00:52,550 A new the area we're getting lots of play in ... 12 00:00:52,560 --> 00:00:54,980 and your office could be at the centre for ... 13 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:58,420 is litigation in retrospective parenting cases. 14 00:00:58,550 --> 00:00:59,710 Retrospective... 15 00:00:59,740 --> 00:01:02,540 Bobby sues Mum and Dad for insufficient attention 16 00:01:02,550 --> 00:01:06,360 leading to lack of confidence, leading to damages against earnings. 17 00:01:06,390 --> 00:01:10,280 Right, and we're OK, the firm's OK with that, ethically? 18 00:01:10,410 --> 00:01:11,810 And morally? 19 00:01:15,340 --> 00:01:16,540 Yep. 20 00:01:16,560 --> 00:01:17,600 Mm-hmm. 21 00:01:17,610 --> 00:01:18,660 Sure. 22 00:01:19,060 --> 00:01:20,470 Yeah, yeah, right. 23 00:01:21,070 --> 00:01:22,130 Are you? 24 00:01:22,850 --> 00:01:24,180 Totally, yeah. 25 00:01:25,870 --> 00:01:27,230 Yes. 26 00:01:28,440 --> 00:01:30,050 OK, Liam, look, 27 00:01:30,050 --> 00:01:33,690 so if we invite you to stay with the firm in the new environment, 28 00:01:34,470 --> 00:01:36,880 what we'd have you do is pull an exhaustive redo 29 00:01:36,880 --> 00:01:38,960 with personnel, maybe... next week. 30 00:01:39,230 --> 00:01:42,410 Oh, well, I was ready to do a big redo right now, but... 31 00:01:42,540 --> 00:01:44,600 No, it's fine, next week's fine. 32 00:01:44,720 --> 00:01:48,450 But I have to ask you this ... they're not going to hit anything 33 00:01:48,470 --> 00:01:50,420 to freak us out, are they? 34 00:01:51,040 --> 00:01:53,300 There's no major deletions this quarter? 35 00:01:53,320 --> 00:01:56,280 No, no, everything's well within... parameters. 36 00:01:57,160 --> 00:02:00,060 Great, OK, Liam, this has been really great. 37 00:02:00,190 --> 00:02:01,230 Um... 38 00:02:01,770 --> 00:02:06,900 Look, really hope to... look forward to seeing you again. 39 00:02:11,550 --> 00:02:12,860 OK, thank you. 40 00:02:26,690 --> 00:02:28,170 Airport, please. 41 00:02:35,060 --> 00:02:36,550 RECORDED VOICE: 'Live... 42 00:02:36,670 --> 00:02:37,810 'breathe... 43 00:02:37,940 --> 00:02:38,960 'smell. 44 00:02:40,030 --> 00:02:41,400 'Full-spectrum memory. 45 00:02:41,430 --> 00:02:44,470 'You can get a willow grain upgrade for less than the price 46 00:02:44,490 --> 00:02:47,870 'of a daily cup of coffee, and three decades of backup for free. 47 00:02:47,900 --> 00:02:50,850 'In-store ingrain procedure with local anaesthetic 48 00:02:50,870 --> 00:02:52,650 'and you're good to go. 49 00:02:52,670 --> 00:02:55,300 'Because memory is for living.' 50 00:03:07,600 --> 00:03:11,600 VOICES AT HIGH SPEED 51 00:03:15,730 --> 00:03:19,490 OK, great, this has been really great, Liam, 52 00:03:19,490 --> 00:03:23,500 we really hope to... look forward to seeing you again. 53 00:03:24,460 --> 00:03:26,300 REWOUND VOICES 54 00:03:26,300 --> 00:03:30,310 we really hope to... look forward to seeing you again. 55 00:03:41,330 --> 00:03:42,390 Sorry! 56 00:03:52,190 --> 00:03:53,190 BLEEP 57 00:03:56,020 --> 00:03:57,400 Mr Foxwell. 58 00:03:57,520 --> 00:04:01,190 Could you just rewind me your last 24 hours for me, please? 59 00:04:10,210 --> 00:04:13,370 Great, and back that up for me times 64 for the week. 60 00:04:19,700 --> 00:04:21,030 That's great. 61 00:04:21,030 --> 00:04:22,760 Enjoy your flight, Mr Foxwell. 62 00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:28,910 I'm not being funny, right, but look at that. 63 00:04:30,070 --> 00:04:31,480 Look at what? 64 00:04:31,490 --> 00:04:32,790 That! 65 00:04:32,790 --> 00:04:35,330 Frayed carpet, there, you see? 66 00:04:35,330 --> 00:04:36,640 Seriously? 67 00:04:36,670 --> 00:04:38,260 Yes, seriously! 68 00:04:38,710 --> 00:04:40,420 This is a five-star suite. 69 00:04:41,120 --> 00:04:43,280 I pay good money to have perfect details. 70 00:04:43,710 --> 00:04:47,400 Now I've got that shitty carpet for the rest of my life. 71 00:04:47,400 --> 00:04:49,480 Only if you keep looking at it, mate. 72 00:04:49,880 --> 00:04:51,380 Oh, thanks, Jonas! 73 00:04:51,790 --> 00:04:52,850 Fuck off. 74 00:04:54,010 --> 00:04:58,470 All right, now, you thought the carpet was bad, have a look at this. 75 00:05:02,950 --> 00:05:06,500 You've met Lucy, my wife, at the Dublin wedding? 76 00:05:06,630 --> 00:05:08,520 Oh, that's right, yes, hi, Liam. 77 00:05:08,910 --> 00:05:10,480 Hi... Hi again. 78 00:05:11,720 --> 00:05:14,390 (Lucy, Dublin.) 79 00:05:15,130 --> 00:05:16,460 Hello. 80 00:05:16,580 --> 00:05:19,000 Lucy ... Liam, we met at the Dublin wedding. 81 00:05:19,270 --> 00:05:20,570 Liam! 82 00:05:20,570 --> 00:05:21,880 Oh, great. 83 00:05:22,180 --> 00:05:23,450 Liam, yes. 84 00:05:23,730 --> 00:05:25,220 Come in. Thank you. 85 00:05:27,210 --> 00:05:29,680 - Great to see you again. - Yeah, you too. 86 00:05:31,590 --> 00:05:33,110 Where's Fi been hiding you? 87 00:05:33,110 --> 00:05:35,030 Oh, you know, in our house. 88 00:05:35,050 --> 00:05:36,060 (LAUGHS) 89 00:05:36,070 --> 00:05:39,260 We didn't know ... well, she didn't know if you would make it. 90 00:05:39,280 --> 00:05:41,120 It was over quicker than I thought. 91 00:05:42,040 --> 00:05:43,870 Oh, sorry, hello. 92 00:05:43,890 --> 00:05:46,840 Let's get you a drink. Um, beer OK? 93 00:05:46,970 --> 00:05:48,550 Lovely, thank you. 94 00:05:50,700 --> 00:05:54,720 Everyone's through there, so I'll be in in a minute, OK? 95 00:05:54,740 --> 00:05:55,840 OK, thank you. 96 00:06:07,150 --> 00:06:08,170 Hi. 97 00:06:09,810 --> 00:06:12,800 You're back early, then, I didn't think you'd make it. 98 00:06:12,920 --> 00:06:16,480 Yeah, I didn't stay over and I caught an early flight back, so... 99 00:06:16,610 --> 00:06:17,890 - Hi. - Hello. 100 00:06:19,260 --> 00:06:20,820 So, how was the appraisal? 101 00:06:20,840 --> 00:06:24,390 Well, they said they'd let me do a redo sometime next week, so... 102 00:06:24,650 --> 00:06:26,120 Oh. But good? 103 00:06:26,580 --> 00:06:27,600 Well... 104 00:06:28,360 --> 00:06:29,670 - Later? - Later. 105 00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:30,690 OK. 106 00:06:30,960 --> 00:06:33,820 - How's Jody? - At home, Gina's babysitting. 107 00:06:33,950 --> 00:06:35,250 Hey. 108 00:06:35,380 --> 00:06:36,520 Jonas, this is... 109 00:06:36,550 --> 00:06:38,550 - Liam ... - Jonas. 110 00:06:38,550 --> 00:06:40,580 Dude, it's really nice to meet you. 111 00:06:40,580 --> 00:06:42,780 - You all right? - Good, thank you. 112 00:06:42,780 --> 00:06:44,460 - And you know Jeff? - Yes. 113 00:06:44,480 --> 00:06:47,590 Yeah, you remember meeting Jeff, because he'd have shown you, 114 00:06:47,610 --> 00:06:50,590 I don't know, a redo of the side of his fridge. 115 00:06:50,720 --> 00:06:52,610 Yeah, yeah, yeah, piss off, Jonas. 116 00:06:52,640 --> 00:06:53,940 - Hello. - Hello. 117 00:06:53,940 --> 00:06:56,100 Your wife's being very mean to me tonight. 118 00:06:56,130 --> 00:06:57,330 Oh, well she's like that. 119 00:06:57,330 --> 00:06:58,730 Yeah, tell me about it. 120 00:06:59,210 --> 00:07:02,250 - You all right for a drink? - I'm fine, thank you, Jonas. 121 00:07:03,160 --> 00:07:06,470 Lynn, come and meet Liam, he's, um... 122 00:07:07,990 --> 00:07:10,790 A soon-to-be unemployed/unemployable lawyer. 123 00:07:10,790 --> 00:07:11,830 (LAUGHS) 124 00:07:13,440 --> 00:07:14,780 And Jeff. 125 00:07:15,480 --> 00:07:17,120 Jeff and Fi... 126 00:07:17,360 --> 00:07:20,600 used to run the parties down the Fraser Road with Paul and me. 127 00:07:21,070 --> 00:07:22,390 Mad old days. 128 00:07:23,430 --> 00:07:25,090 Before we started up the Kings. 129 00:07:26,490 --> 00:07:28,010 So, yeah... 130 00:07:29,900 --> 00:07:33,820 So, Liam, what was it you had, an assessment? 131 00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:35,150 Appraisal. 132 00:07:35,150 --> 00:07:36,430 How'd it go? 133 00:07:36,430 --> 00:07:37,830 Good. 134 00:07:37,950 --> 00:07:42,070 Well, it was a disaster, but you know, I don't know. 135 00:07:42,090 --> 00:07:43,430 - Hard to gauge? - Yeah 136 00:07:43,440 --> 00:07:44,730 Let's have a look. 137 00:07:44,810 --> 00:07:46,950 Redo, we can appraise the appraisal. 138 00:07:48,170 --> 00:07:49,490 Yeah, great. 139 00:07:49,610 --> 00:07:51,620 Throw it up there and we can grade you. 140 00:07:51,960 --> 00:07:53,770 - Come on. - Um... 141 00:07:53,790 --> 00:07:55,900 It could be fun, we could, um... 142 00:07:55,920 --> 00:07:56,950 vote! 143 00:07:57,740 --> 00:07:59,110 - Paul? - Yeah? 144 00:07:59,190 --> 00:08:02,230 I work in recruitment, so it might be quite useful for you. 145 00:08:02,230 --> 00:08:02,830 Right, OK. 146 00:08:02,830 --> 00:08:05,510 Liam's redoing his appraisal so we can give him marks. 147 00:08:05,640 --> 00:08:07,640 - Notes. - Pointers, you know. 148 00:08:07,650 --> 00:08:09,920 - I think Liam would probably... - Yes, do you know what... 149 00:08:09,930 --> 00:08:13,090 Guys, no, come on, seriously, that's not cool, 150 00:08:13,100 --> 00:08:15,570 I mean Liam's obviously uncomfortable, 151 00:08:15,570 --> 00:08:17,860 so let's just drop it, yeah? 152 00:08:18,870 --> 00:08:20,200 Have a cool time. 153 00:08:22,070 --> 00:08:23,380 Time to eat! 154 00:08:23,390 --> 00:08:24,830 Oh, it's ready. 155 00:08:28,660 --> 00:08:31,100 Thank you so much for inviting us this evening. 156 00:08:31,130 --> 00:08:33,950 It's been too long, too long. 157 00:08:34,460 --> 00:08:35,800 Fi. 158 00:08:37,930 --> 00:08:40,600 I haven't met him before, have I? Jonas, is it? 159 00:08:40,730 --> 00:08:42,340 He's one of the old crowd. 160 00:08:42,580 --> 00:08:43,930 I think I said. 161 00:08:45,370 --> 00:08:46,880 - You OK? - Yeah, yeah. 162 00:08:46,890 --> 00:08:50,190 - You know, if you're not in the mood, we can go. - No, no, I'm fine. 163 00:08:50,210 --> 00:08:51,220 Sure? 164 00:09:06,130 --> 00:09:10,140 QUIETLY TALKING AND LAUGHING 165 00:09:10,940 --> 00:09:11,960 Hey! 166 00:09:18,400 --> 00:09:21,250 Yeah! I brought enough for others to share. 167 00:09:21,250 --> 00:09:22,410 Thank you. 168 00:09:22,410 --> 00:09:25,580 I've, er, been cooking a lot since the break-up. 169 00:09:25,580 --> 00:09:27,500 Jonas has had a tough one. 170 00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:28,740 DOORBELL RINGS 171 00:09:28,740 --> 00:09:29,980 Was it bad? 172 00:09:29,980 --> 00:09:32,230 Er, yeah. 173 00:09:32,260 --> 00:09:35,070 Yeah, erm, we were in the middle of planning is all 174 00:09:35,090 --> 00:09:39,250 and I suddenly realised that the less the relationship means 175 00:09:39,270 --> 00:09:41,270 the more you spend on the wedding, you know! 176 00:09:41,300 --> 00:09:42,320 (LAUGHS) 177 00:09:42,320 --> 00:09:44,850 You actually start obsessing over the tiniest little details, 178 00:09:44,850 --> 00:09:47,890 like the thickness of the wedding invitation paper 179 00:09:47,890 --> 00:09:52,160 because, I mean, God knows you need something to fucking talk about! 180 00:09:52,210 --> 00:09:55,040 So, everybody, this is Helen. 181 00:09:55,690 --> 00:09:57,420 Helen, Jonas. 182 00:09:57,540 --> 00:09:58,940 - Hi. - Hi. 183 00:09:59,250 --> 00:10:01,030 And everyone! 184 00:10:01,770 --> 00:10:03,710 (ALL) - Hi! - Help yourself. 185 00:10:03,740 --> 00:10:06,640 Jonas was just explaining why relationships are a sham. 186 00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:08,240 Are they? Shit! 187 00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:11,350 They're like going to the theatre, OK? 188 00:10:11,470 --> 00:10:15,610 You pay loads to go and ultimately you are wasting your entire night, 189 00:10:15,620 --> 00:10:18,740 so, when someone asks you, "Did you have a good time?", 190 00:10:18,740 --> 00:10:22,750 you both say, "Yeah! Yeah, it was great." 191 00:10:22,760 --> 00:10:24,900 The problem is the more that you pay 192 00:10:24,910 --> 00:10:29,120 and the longer it goes on, the more you're, "Oh, yeah, we loved it!", 193 00:10:29,160 --> 00:10:32,920 you know, "We love being together and never fucking anyone else" 194 00:10:32,920 --> 00:10:35,010 "and only just having one other person" 195 00:10:35,010 --> 00:10:40,330 "to share our real thoughts with for our entire lives, yeah, it's great!" 196 00:10:40,350 --> 00:10:42,450 Would you say you loved her, though? 197 00:10:45,640 --> 00:10:50,340 I just think we just really fancied each other and that was what it was. 198 00:10:50,350 --> 00:10:51,780 You know what it's like early on. 199 00:10:51,790 --> 00:10:53,920 You know, we were just, I don't know, 200 00:10:53,920 --> 00:10:56,080 we were just two tools in the tool shed 201 00:10:56,080 --> 00:10:57,800 that just fit together really fucking well. 202 00:10:57,800 --> 00:11:02,450 I mean, still, by the end, I'd be like, "Go on, honey, you go up," 203 00:11:02,450 --> 00:11:04,660 "I'm just going to watch a little bit more of the news" 204 00:11:04,660 --> 00:11:07,260 and I'd find myself, you know, watching redos of, like, 205 00:11:07,260 --> 00:11:09,380 hot times in earlier relationships! 206 00:11:09,380 --> 00:11:10,700 Easy! 207 00:11:11,420 --> 00:11:14,120 I'm just saying, there's a beautiful woman upstairs, 208 00:11:14,140 --> 00:11:15,520 you know, waiting to have sex with me. 209 00:11:15,490 --> 00:11:16,780 What, right now? 210 00:11:16,800 --> 00:11:20,280 (THEY LAUGH) 211 00:11:20,300 --> 00:11:23,450 She's upstairs, you know, waiting to have sex with me 212 00:11:23,450 --> 00:11:27,450 and I'm sat downstairs watching redos of, like, some hot times 213 00:11:27,730 --> 00:11:31,330 with some hot girl that I just picked up in some place 214 00:11:31,330 --> 00:11:35,260 and I'm fucking pulling myself off. I mean, seriously? 215 00:11:37,980 --> 00:11:39,320 Oh, come on... 216 00:11:39,870 --> 00:11:41,990 Come on, guys. 217 00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:43,760 I mean, we all scroll through the Grain 218 00:11:43,760 --> 00:11:45,360 rifling through our greatest hits 219 00:11:45,360 --> 00:11:48,440 for a little bit of filth now and then, surely? 220 00:11:48,570 --> 00:11:49,870 Not me. 221 00:11:51,950 --> 00:11:53,920 Helen doesn't have a Grain! 222 00:11:55,010 --> 00:11:56,820 - Oh, wow! - Wow! 223 00:11:57,090 --> 00:11:58,480 No shit! 224 00:11:58,740 --> 00:12:00,780 Was that a political thing? 225 00:12:00,790 --> 00:12:03,310 No, no, I was gouged about 12 months ago. 226 00:12:03,310 --> 00:12:05,790 Jesus, was that painful? 227 00:12:05,790 --> 00:12:08,040 Total agony. 228 00:12:08,040 --> 00:12:10,840 But on the plus of that, I don't remember it that clearly. 229 00:12:10,840 --> 00:12:12,360 There's a scar on here. 230 00:12:13,020 --> 00:12:14,800 Yeah, can I, er...? 231 00:12:26,990 --> 00:12:28,230 Yeah, that feels quite nice. 232 00:12:28,230 --> 00:12:29,790 Yeah, that feels quite nice. (THEY CHUCKLE) 233 00:12:29,790 --> 00:12:32,600 Yeah, no brain damage, clearly! 234 00:12:32,600 --> 00:12:35,860 Well, my sight held on fine, so... 235 00:12:35,980 --> 00:12:37,690 So, who took it then? 236 00:12:37,690 --> 00:12:40,010 Stolen to order, as far as they could tell, 237 00:12:40,010 --> 00:12:43,380 probably to some millionaire Chinese perve. 238 00:12:43,380 --> 00:12:44,980 Really?! Yeah. 239 00:12:44,980 --> 00:12:46,660 Is that for real? 240 00:12:46,660 --> 00:12:48,740 Yeah, and none of it was encrypted, so... 241 00:12:48,750 --> 00:12:50,750 So, they saw the lot! 242 00:12:50,750 --> 00:12:54,020 The thing is, after I was gouged I didn't have one for a few days 243 00:12:54,140 --> 00:12:56,010 and then just kind of, liked it. 244 00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:01,240 It's cool. 245 00:13:01,250 --> 00:13:02,330 That's cool. 246 00:13:02,330 --> 00:13:04,490 I mean, because more people are... 247 00:13:04,490 --> 00:13:07,170 I mean, now, right? Like, going Grainless? 248 00:13:07,170 --> 00:13:08,610 I believe it's huge with hookers. 249 00:13:08,620 --> 00:13:10,300 I mean, no offence! 250 00:13:10,300 --> 00:13:11,420 (THEY LAUGH) 251 00:13:11,420 --> 00:13:14,150 No, no, it's OK. Sure, I... 252 00:13:14,150 --> 00:13:16,360 Well, I'm pretty boring. One man is a time. 253 00:13:16,490 --> 00:13:17,520 Boo! 254 00:13:18,870 --> 00:13:21,310 Serial monogamist. 255 00:13:21,320 --> 00:13:23,130 I'm a serial monogamist. 256 00:13:23,680 --> 00:13:25,880 I'm staying faithful to my cornflakes right now! 257 00:13:25,890 --> 00:13:27,990 (LAUGHS) 258 00:13:30,020 --> 00:13:33,010 Well, I think it's an interesting choice, going Grainless. 259 00:13:33,010 --> 00:13:34,180 It's a brave choice. 260 00:13:34,180 --> 00:13:35,940 I'm sorry, but I... 261 00:13:38,420 --> 00:13:39,950 I couldn't do it. 262 00:13:39,950 --> 00:13:41,430 Uh-huh. 263 00:13:43,990 --> 00:13:48,000 OK, I was going to play some redos from the Fraser O days. 264 00:13:48,360 --> 00:13:49,440 (ALL) Yay! 265 00:13:49,440 --> 00:13:51,840 Stuff from last night, depressing and fun. 266 00:13:52,580 --> 00:13:55,750 You know half the organic memories you have a junk, 267 00:13:56,050 --> 00:13:57,370 just not trustworthy. 268 00:13:57,390 --> 00:13:59,140 Colleen works in Grain development. 269 00:13:59,140 --> 00:14:02,220 With half the population you can implant false memories, 270 00:14:02,230 --> 00:14:04,570 just by asking leading questions in therapy. 271 00:14:04,700 --> 00:14:07,100 You can make people remember getting lost 272 00:14:07,110 --> 00:14:08,990 in shopping malls they never visited, 273 00:14:08,990 --> 00:14:12,010 getting bothered by paedophile babysitters they never had. 274 00:14:13,930 --> 00:14:16,010 I'm just happier now. 275 00:14:17,780 --> 00:14:18,940 TAPE REWINDING 276 00:14:19,250 --> 00:14:23,100 'OK, great, Liam, this has been, this has been really great, erm... 277 00:14:23,100 --> 00:14:25,820 'we really hope to look forward to seeing you again.' 278 00:14:25,830 --> 00:14:27,790 He looks forward to seeing you again, that's good. 279 00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:29,230 "Hopes" to look forward. 280 00:14:29,230 --> 00:14:30,710 TAPE REWINDING 281 00:14:30,710 --> 00:14:33,870 'We really hope to look forward to seeing you again.' 282 00:14:33,870 --> 00:14:35,180 It's phoney. 283 00:14:36,460 --> 00:14:37,840 Hang on. 284 00:14:37,840 --> 00:14:39,110 Pause it. 285 00:14:39,240 --> 00:14:40,650 Now backup. 286 00:14:41,490 --> 00:14:42,880 Zoom in there. 287 00:14:43,610 --> 00:14:45,170 Come on, that's a tick. 288 00:14:45,170 --> 00:14:46,730 That could be a V or an L. 289 00:14:46,740 --> 00:14:49,130 - It's a tick! - Or the start of the swastika. 290 00:14:49,140 --> 00:14:52,560 It's probably the start of the swastika, they were such pricks! 291 00:14:57,440 --> 00:15:00,110 - Did you have fun with the old gang? - Yeah. 292 00:15:02,320 --> 00:15:04,000 D'you speak to that Jonas much? 293 00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:05,860 No, no, not really. 294 00:15:10,090 --> 00:15:11,800 He's a bit of a knob, ain't he? 295 00:15:11,820 --> 00:15:13,500 Bit of a dick? 296 00:15:13,500 --> 00:15:14,540 Jonas. 297 00:15:14,540 --> 00:15:18,100 Pulling himself off to his own relationship theories. 298 00:15:18,100 --> 00:15:21,430 Oh, it must be such a drag, Jonas, putting it about! 299 00:15:21,430 --> 00:15:24,150 And when he protected me from those arseholes, 300 00:15:24,160 --> 00:15:26,000 "Hey, come on, guys," 301 00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:28,680 "it's really not cool to redo another man's appraisals, dudes." 302 00:15:28,680 --> 00:15:30,520 Then why invite him over? 303 00:15:30,520 --> 00:15:31,840 I like him. 304 00:15:37,820 --> 00:15:40,220 You wanted me to invite him. 305 00:15:40,220 --> 00:15:41,900 I didn't say anything. 306 00:15:41,900 --> 00:15:44,470 You were laughing at everything he said. 307 00:15:44,470 --> 00:15:46,990 You invited him! 308 00:15:46,990 --> 00:15:49,340 It was obvious I didn't want him to come. 309 00:15:51,560 --> 00:15:54,770 'Wow, it's only, it's early to call it a night.' 310 00:15:54,770 --> 00:15:56,480 'Do fancy a quick one down the pub?' 311 00:15:56,490 --> 00:15:57,810 'Oh, we've got to get back, 312 00:15:57,810 --> 00:16:00,370 'rescue Jodie from the paedophile babysitter! 313 00:16:00,370 --> 00:16:01,940 '(LAUGHS)' 314 00:16:01,950 --> 00:16:03,260 'Yeah.' 315 00:16:05,180 --> 00:16:09,030 'But why don't you come back to ours, for a nightcap if you want?' 316 00:16:09,030 --> 00:16:10,070 See? 317 00:16:10,070 --> 00:16:14,330 It was obvious I didn't want him to come, I was being polite to a moron. 318 00:16:14,460 --> 00:16:17,310 If you really don't want to come, you can get rid of him. 319 00:16:29,330 --> 00:16:30,410 Hey, hey! 320 00:16:30,420 --> 00:16:31,490 Hey. 321 00:16:33,120 --> 00:16:35,320 Well, actually, what time is it? 322 00:16:35,360 --> 00:16:36,840 It's midnight. 323 00:16:36,860 --> 00:16:38,940 Shit, it's quite late, time's gone on. 324 00:16:38,960 --> 00:16:40,960 (LAUGHS) Yeah, time does that. 325 00:16:41,120 --> 00:16:42,200 15 minutes. 326 00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:43,360 Yeah. 327 00:16:43,360 --> 00:16:46,390 But we've got the babysitter inside, so... 328 00:16:46,520 --> 00:16:48,370 So, is that new info? 329 00:16:48,370 --> 00:16:52,380 No, it's just that we, I mean, we thought, right, Fi? 330 00:16:52,660 --> 00:16:54,460 Yeah. Yeah. 331 00:16:54,460 --> 00:16:55,820 OK, no, I get it. 332 00:16:55,820 --> 00:16:57,940 No, it's just that, actually, it turns out we're tired 333 00:16:57,950 --> 00:17:00,990 and I guess we forgot, but now we've remembered, so... 334 00:17:00,990 --> 00:17:02,030 Sorry. 335 00:17:02,030 --> 00:17:02,870 No, it's fine, really. 336 00:17:02,870 --> 00:17:03,920 I'm sorry. 337 00:17:03,920 --> 00:17:06,480 Oh, it's cool, no worries. 338 00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:08,360 I've got a back-up plan, so... 339 00:17:08,360 --> 00:17:10,120 Oh, cool, well, we vote the back-up. 340 00:17:10,130 --> 00:17:11,570 Yeah, I will do. 341 00:17:11,570 --> 00:17:13,330 Er, see you later, Fi. 342 00:17:13,330 --> 00:17:14,490 It was good to meet you, man. 343 00:17:14,490 --> 00:17:15,510 Yeah. 344 00:17:15,930 --> 00:17:16,980 Nice one. 345 00:17:16,980 --> 00:17:18,400 Brilliant. Brilliant. 346 00:17:20,580 --> 00:17:21,890 OK, cool. 347 00:17:25,750 --> 00:17:27,070 Good to meet you, man. 348 00:17:27,190 --> 00:17:28,210 Yeah. 349 00:17:30,550 --> 00:17:34,290 Listen, Gina, it's a 40-minute wait for a cab, but if you want, 350 00:17:34,410 --> 00:17:36,580 I have the bed made up in my office. 351 00:17:36,710 --> 00:17:38,030 Er... OK, thanks, Fi. 352 00:17:39,700 --> 00:17:43,700 Hey, there's just, you know, use anything. There's T-shirts and... 353 00:17:43,820 --> 00:17:45,710 Yeah, thanks, I'll show myself out. 354 00:17:45,720 --> 00:17:46,750 All right, night. 355 00:17:46,750 --> 00:17:47,790 Night, guys. 356 00:17:47,790 --> 00:17:49,100 Night, Gina. 357 00:17:56,360 --> 00:17:57,740 Thank you. 358 00:17:59,230 --> 00:18:00,330 'Bye-bye. 359 00:18:00,360 --> 00:18:02,250 'OK. 360 00:18:02,250 --> 00:18:04,520 'Love you, love you.' 361 00:18:23,760 --> 00:18:25,730 Was he a big part of the gang? 362 00:18:25,730 --> 00:18:27,120 Who? Jonas? 363 00:18:29,130 --> 00:18:31,020 I don't know, yeah? 364 00:18:32,240 --> 00:18:35,140 Let me guess, he'd spent his time oozing round the girls, 365 00:18:35,140 --> 00:18:36,220 offering backrubs. 366 00:18:36,220 --> 00:18:37,510 Not really. 367 00:18:37,510 --> 00:18:39,260 Circling for an orifice. 368 00:18:41,470 --> 00:18:42,950 Was he always that oily or... 369 00:18:42,950 --> 00:18:44,270 OK, look. 370 00:18:46,380 --> 00:18:47,640 What? 371 00:18:47,640 --> 00:18:48,950 It's nothing, but... 372 00:18:51,730 --> 00:18:55,740 You may have noticed a bit of an atmosphere because... 373 00:18:57,450 --> 00:19:00,990 me and Jonas, years ago, had a bit of a thing. 374 00:19:00,990 --> 00:19:03,150 You had a thing with oily dude man? 375 00:19:03,150 --> 00:19:04,230 It was just a little thing 376 00:19:04,230 --> 00:19:05,750 and I didn't even know you back then, so... 377 00:19:05,750 --> 00:19:07,410 You slept with oily dude man? 378 00:19:08,290 --> 00:19:09,560 That's hilarious! 379 00:19:09,560 --> 00:19:12,240 We've all got our skeletons, how about you and Gemma? 380 00:19:12,240 --> 00:19:13,850 What, I told you about Gemma. 381 00:19:13,850 --> 00:19:15,190 Gemma was a nutcase... 382 00:19:16,200 --> 00:19:18,240 But you never mentioned Jonas. 383 00:19:18,260 --> 00:19:21,130 I did, I told you I hooked up with someone in Marrakech. 384 00:19:21,140 --> 00:19:22,330 Jonas is Mr Marrakesh?! 385 00:19:22,340 --> 00:19:23,580 It was a stupid thing... 386 00:19:23,590 --> 00:19:27,630 I thought Mr Marrakech was some sort of super cool... 387 00:19:27,630 --> 00:19:28,670 Not him. 388 00:19:28,670 --> 00:19:30,830 It was years ago and... 389 00:19:30,840 --> 00:19:33,240 Are you embarrassed by that? 390 00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:35,220 Cos it's embarrassing. 391 00:19:35,870 --> 00:19:39,020 I'm sorry, but, Christ, are you not embarrassed? 392 00:19:39,020 --> 00:19:40,500 It was years ago. 393 00:19:40,500 --> 00:19:42,260 But you dated him for a month? 394 00:19:42,260 --> 00:19:43,460 That's what I said. 395 00:19:43,470 --> 00:19:47,470 Cos when you told me about Mr Marrakech, it was a week. 396 00:19:48,270 --> 00:19:49,330 No, I didn't. 397 00:19:50,400 --> 00:19:51,470 Pah! 398 00:19:53,320 --> 00:19:54,800 TAPE WINDING 399 00:19:55,110 --> 00:19:56,320 'What about you?' 400 00:19:56,330 --> 00:19:58,610 I don't want to see our first time right now. 401 00:19:58,610 --> 00:19:59,690 Shh, you're about to talk. 402 00:19:59,690 --> 00:20:02,850 'I went away and had a little thing that did my head in for a while 403 00:20:02,860 --> 00:20:05,980 'with this, sort of... 404 00:20:05,980 --> 00:20:09,540 '..this, sort of, headfuck that I met in Marrakech.' 405 00:20:09,550 --> 00:20:10,870 'Mr Marrakech?' 406 00:20:10,870 --> 00:20:12,190 '(LAUGHS) Yeah.' 407 00:20:12,190 --> 00:20:15,590 'I'm imagining a chillum and a big knob.' 408 00:20:15,600 --> 00:20:19,600 '(LAUGHS) No, it was like dormouse.' 409 00:20:19,680 --> 00:20:22,530 'Big deal, big heart-breaker?' 410 00:20:22,530 --> 00:20:24,970 'No, it was just a week. 411 00:20:24,970 --> 00:20:27,290 'It was a weird week.' 412 00:20:27,300 --> 00:20:28,620 So, a weird week or a month? 413 00:20:28,620 --> 00:20:30,460 The point is, it wasn't a big deal. 414 00:20:30,460 --> 00:20:32,220 Well, it was big enough to do your head in. 415 00:20:33,060 --> 00:20:36,460 Jonas, King Dormouse-Dick of Marrakech did your head in! 416 00:20:39,230 --> 00:20:41,720 That was a nice night, used to be. 417 00:20:41,720 --> 00:20:43,220 You're getting obsessed. 418 00:20:44,080 --> 00:20:45,160 I'm not. 419 00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:47,650 We had all this with Dan, I don't want you going like that again. 420 00:20:47,650 --> 00:20:50,450 He had little creepy beady eyes and he was always... 421 00:20:50,450 --> 00:20:52,460 What? Acting like he was interested? 422 00:20:52,460 --> 00:20:54,620 And you know what, I think he probably did fancy me 423 00:20:54,620 --> 00:20:56,700 and actually he wasn't completely hideous, 424 00:20:56,700 --> 00:21:00,650 so in another life I don't know, but nothing happened! 425 00:21:01,710 --> 00:21:04,350 And Jonas... 426 00:21:04,360 --> 00:21:08,360 he's an old fling. So what? Don't go all fucked up! 427 00:21:08,720 --> 00:21:10,000 What, I'm fucked up, am I? 428 00:21:10,010 --> 00:21:11,250 No, I mean, just... 429 00:21:11,250 --> 00:21:15,250 No, no, no, that's brilliant, sometimes you're a bitch. 430 00:21:18,630 --> 00:21:20,350 I didn't mean that. 431 00:21:21,820 --> 00:21:23,100 'You're a bitch!' 432 00:21:23,110 --> 00:21:25,270 I'd like you to erase that. 433 00:21:25,270 --> 00:21:26,350 'You're a bitch!' 434 00:21:26,350 --> 00:21:28,230 Also, "sometimes". 435 00:21:28,230 --> 00:21:31,410 You can't just edit off the word, "sometimes"! 436 00:22:12,750 --> 00:22:17,090 I'm sorry, Fi, I know I go a bit weird and wonky sometimes. 437 00:22:26,890 --> 00:22:28,930 - I love you, you know? - I know. 438 00:23:44,650 --> 00:23:46,420 WINDING TAPE 439 00:23:46,420 --> 00:23:49,380 '..in a toolshed that just fit together really fucking well, 440 00:23:49,380 --> 00:23:52,710 'but still by the end I'd be like, "Go, on, you go to bed, honey, 441 00:23:52,710 --> 00:23:54,910 '"I'm just going to catch a little bit more of the news," 442 00:23:54,910 --> 00:23:58,760 'and then I'd find myself, you know, watching redos of hot times 443 00:23:58,760 --> 00:24:00,830 'in earlier relationships. 444 00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:05,690 'I've got a beautiful woman upstairs waiting to have sex with me. 445 00:24:06,810 --> 00:24:10,180 'And I'd find myself, you know, watching redos of hot times 446 00:24:10,180 --> 00:24:12,300 'in earlier relationships.' 447 00:24:12,300 --> 00:24:13,600 'Easy!' 448 00:24:24,280 --> 00:24:27,060 'Lip read reconstruction enabled. 449 00:24:27,710 --> 00:24:30,720 - 'Hey, it's good to see you. - 'Good to see you, too. 450 00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:33,430 'I was nervous when I heard you were going to be here. 451 00:24:33,430 --> 00:24:35,110 'It's weird, isn't it?' 452 00:24:37,750 --> 00:24:39,480 - Morning. - Gina, over here. 453 00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:43,570 Come here a second. I just want your opinion. 454 00:24:43,570 --> 00:24:45,190 It's just a silly game. 455 00:24:50,080 --> 00:24:51,380 Sit down. 456 00:24:51,720 --> 00:24:53,110 Answer this. 457 00:24:54,700 --> 00:24:56,590 I'm a serial monogamist. 458 00:24:57,450 --> 00:25:00,150 I'm staying faithful to my corn flakes right now. 459 00:25:00,160 --> 00:25:02,090 LAUGHTER 460 00:25:03,880 --> 00:25:05,990 Now, is that funny? 461 00:25:06,860 --> 00:25:10,220 There's no need to be nice, the man's a prick. 462 00:25:11,130 --> 00:25:14,900 Is that funny, in your opinion? 463 00:25:15,320 --> 00:25:16,700 Well... 464 00:25:16,700 --> 00:25:18,430 I'm a serial monogamist. 465 00:25:19,360 --> 00:25:21,790 I'm staying faithful to my corn flakes right now. 466 00:25:22,060 --> 00:25:23,740 LAUGHTER 467 00:25:23,860 --> 00:25:25,100 - No? - No 468 00:25:25,230 --> 00:25:26,920 - I don't know. - You do. 469 00:25:27,560 --> 00:25:28,950 Morning. 470 00:25:29,080 --> 00:25:30,370 What's this? 471 00:25:30,370 --> 00:25:32,780 I'm just getting Gina's opinion on something. 472 00:25:32,800 --> 00:25:34,480 I'm a serial monogamist. 473 00:25:34,960 --> 00:25:37,580 I'm staying faithful to my corn flakes right now. 474 00:25:37,580 --> 00:25:39,580 LAUGHTER 475 00:25:39,700 --> 00:25:42,580 I was just wondering because you found it funny, but it isn't, 476 00:25:42,710 --> 00:25:44,030 and Gina agrees. 477 00:25:44,150 --> 00:25:45,610 I don't really want to get involved. 478 00:25:45,620 --> 00:25:47,750 Let me get you a cab. My dad's on his way. 479 00:25:47,760 --> 00:25:49,240 Just one other thing. 480 00:25:50,420 --> 00:25:55,090 We both want him to come back, but who wants him to come back more? 481 00:25:55,220 --> 00:25:58,370 Off the top of your head, who wants him to come back more? 482 00:25:58,490 --> 00:26:00,050 OK, well, bye. 483 00:26:00,180 --> 00:26:01,230 Yeah, bye. 484 00:26:01,800 --> 00:26:04,590 Wow, it's early. It's early to call it a night. 485 00:26:04,610 --> 00:26:06,670 Fancy a quick one down the pub? 486 00:26:06,800 --> 00:26:09,790 Got to get back, rescue Jodie from the paedophile baby-sitter. 487 00:26:09,790 --> 00:26:10,990 That's just a... 488 00:26:10,990 --> 00:26:13,080 That's a joke. 489 00:26:13,430 --> 00:26:14,450 Sorry. 490 00:26:14,920 --> 00:26:18,400 Jonas, why don't you come back to ours for a nightcap, if you want? 491 00:26:19,360 --> 00:26:20,650 Yeah. 492 00:26:20,670 --> 00:26:21,910 KNOCKING AT DOOR 493 00:26:22,040 --> 00:26:25,640 Now, ignore the joke. Who's more keen for him to come back? 494 00:26:25,660 --> 00:26:27,090 I don't know. 495 00:26:27,090 --> 00:26:28,350 You do know, Gina. 496 00:26:28,580 --> 00:26:30,510 I'm so sorry, he's really hungover. 497 00:26:30,510 --> 00:26:31,910 That's OK. 498 00:26:45,530 --> 00:26:48,080 I'm staying faithful to my corn flakes right now. 499 00:26:48,100 --> 00:26:49,530 LAUGHTER 500 00:26:50,180 --> 00:26:52,020 That is just objectively not funny. 501 00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:54,020 Anyone would say, "That's not funny." 502 00:26:54,090 --> 00:26:55,770 That was fucking embarrassing. 503 00:26:58,950 --> 00:27:01,470 Whatever you're queuing up, stop it. 504 00:27:01,470 --> 00:27:02,980 Sit down, please. 505 00:27:12,650 --> 00:27:14,010 You see that? 506 00:27:14,660 --> 00:27:16,570 You know Geoff? 507 00:27:16,590 --> 00:27:19,540 Yeah, you remember me and Geoff, because he would have shown you 508 00:27:19,920 --> 00:27:23,550 a re-do of the side of his fridge, something like that. 509 00:27:24,210 --> 00:27:26,270 - Spot the difference. - You're drunk. 510 00:27:26,390 --> 00:27:29,360 I'm the difference. He's the greatest guy in the world 511 00:27:29,360 --> 00:27:31,720 and then I arrived and... you clam. 512 00:27:32,470 --> 00:27:33,780 For clarity. 513 00:27:35,980 --> 00:27:37,850 We're just talking! 514 00:27:38,410 --> 00:27:41,330 But moments later, you're so stiff. 515 00:27:41,460 --> 00:27:42,990 I don't know, a re-do... 516 00:27:43,000 --> 00:27:45,130 You don't know how to stand around him. 517 00:27:45,150 --> 00:27:47,590 Your gauges are all over the place, hot and cold. 518 00:27:47,590 --> 00:27:49,030 This is just stupid! 519 00:27:49,030 --> 00:27:51,120 You can't hide it. Not completely. 520 00:27:52,140 --> 00:27:53,730 See how you look at him. 521 00:27:54,200 --> 00:27:58,000 The less the relationship means, the more you spend on the wedding. 522 00:27:58,010 --> 00:28:01,290 Really, you start obsessing about these tiny little details 523 00:28:01,290 --> 00:28:04,090 like the thickness of the wedding invitation paper. 524 00:28:04,090 --> 00:28:06,820 Now, how you look at me. 525 00:28:06,820 --> 00:28:09,340 I think it's an interesting choice, going grainless. 526 00:28:09,340 --> 00:28:10,700 It's a brave choice. 527 00:28:10,700 --> 00:28:14,230 I'm sorry, but... 528 00:28:14,230 --> 00:28:17,310 Tell me you look at me nice like you look at him. You can't. 529 00:28:17,320 --> 00:28:19,920 And how am I looking at you now, Liam? 530 00:28:19,920 --> 00:28:21,920 How long did you go out with him for? 531 00:28:21,920 --> 00:28:23,940 Does it matter? 532 00:28:25,870 --> 00:28:28,770 FILM REWINDING 533 00:28:29,010 --> 00:28:32,580 You know, half the organic memories you have are junk. 534 00:28:32,580 --> 00:28:35,370 Just not trustworthy. When it comes to little things. 535 00:28:35,400 --> 00:28:36,750 And big ones. 536 00:28:37,510 --> 00:28:39,030 Is that Marrakesh? 537 00:28:40,760 --> 00:28:43,180 Does that look like Marrakesh? 538 00:28:46,520 --> 00:28:47,600 No. 539 00:28:47,600 --> 00:28:49,610 It's not Marrakesh. 540 00:28:49,610 --> 00:28:53,610 So, how long did you go out with him for? 541 00:28:55,820 --> 00:28:58,420 All right, about six months. 542 00:29:01,940 --> 00:29:04,710 So not a week or a month. Six months. 543 00:29:05,040 --> 00:29:07,210 The ever-inflating romance. 544 00:29:07,210 --> 00:29:09,160 You're probably still going out with him. 545 00:29:09,160 --> 00:29:10,760 Why am I on trial here? 546 00:29:11,410 --> 00:29:12,840 What's been going on? 547 00:29:12,850 --> 00:29:14,930 Nothing has been going on. 548 00:29:14,930 --> 00:29:19,370 It was... Christ, you know how it is when you first get with someone 549 00:29:19,370 --> 00:29:22,690 and then previous boyfriends come up. 550 00:29:22,700 --> 00:29:24,990 He was never a boyfriend, he was always a weird week. 551 00:29:25,010 --> 00:29:27,470 I downplayed it. I fudged it, it was... 552 00:29:27,480 --> 00:29:28,350 You lied. 553 00:29:28,360 --> 00:29:31,310 Not everything that isn't true is a lie, Liam. 554 00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:34,920 Hello? 555 00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:38,110 So he was a bigger thing than I made out and, yeah, he's sort of a dick. 556 00:29:38,170 --> 00:29:39,550 Sort of? He's a massive... 557 00:29:39,570 --> 00:29:41,370 I liked him then. 558 00:29:41,370 --> 00:29:45,050 And I don't like him, not like that, not now. 559 00:29:46,300 --> 00:29:48,600 So, just to get this clear. 560 00:29:48,720 --> 00:29:51,520 He fucks you, gets footage for his redo wank file, 561 00:29:51,540 --> 00:29:52,480 but you're still pally. 562 00:29:52,500 --> 00:29:53,470 This is sad! 563 00:29:53,500 --> 00:29:55,490 - Cos if he was... - This is just sad! 564 00:29:55,490 --> 00:29:57,330 He probably sits there and tosses himself 565 00:29:57,330 --> 00:29:58,870 off all over his cashmere blanket. 566 00:29:58,900 --> 00:30:00,140 It was years ago! 567 00:30:01,210 --> 00:30:02,520 Not for him. 568 00:30:03,730 --> 00:30:07,190 I'd find myself watching redos of really hot times 569 00:30:07,200 --> 00:30:09,020 early in relationships. 570 00:30:09,150 --> 00:30:10,300 'Easy.' 571 00:30:11,170 --> 00:30:13,500 Sober up. Make yourself puke. 572 00:30:13,630 --> 00:30:16,190 Whatever, I don't care. Just sort this out. 573 00:30:17,180 --> 00:30:18,250 Fuck. 574 00:30:18,870 --> 00:30:23,370 I'd find myself watching redos of really hot times 575 00:30:23,390 --> 00:30:25,540 early in relationships. 576 00:30:25,560 --> 00:30:26,870 Easy. 577 00:30:29,610 --> 00:30:33,210 And I'm downstairs watching some redo of some night 578 00:30:33,220 --> 00:30:36,380 I've picked up somebody else and... 579 00:30:36,380 --> 00:30:39,870 Yeah, nice, Geoff. She's upstairs waiting to have sex with me 580 00:30:39,870 --> 00:30:42,550 and I'm downstairs watching some redo 581 00:30:42,550 --> 00:30:44,710 of some night I've picked up somebody else. 582 00:30:44,720 --> 00:30:46,320 Easy. 583 00:30:46,320 --> 00:30:49,240 And I'm fucking pulling myself off. I'm just saying. 584 00:30:52,620 --> 00:30:54,080 'Green warning. 585 00:30:54,090 --> 00:30:56,840 'Grain assistant suggests you may not be in a suitable 586 00:30:56,840 --> 00:31:00,360 'physical condition for the activity you appear to be engaged in. 587 00:31:00,390 --> 00:31:02,820 'To override, continue at your own risk. 588 00:31:02,950 --> 00:31:05,910 'All health and personal accident insurance is... ' 589 00:31:05,920 --> 00:31:07,250 Thank you. 590 00:31:18,590 --> 00:31:20,350 BUZZER 591 00:31:22,850 --> 00:31:24,690 - 'Who's that?' - It's Liam. 592 00:31:26,610 --> 00:31:28,050 Liam from last night. 593 00:31:28,950 --> 00:31:31,870 'Liam. Is Fi with you?' 594 00:31:31,990 --> 00:31:33,590 She's not, no. 595 00:31:34,280 --> 00:31:37,130 'Sorry, Liam, mate, is there something that you want?' 596 00:31:37,140 --> 00:31:39,560 Yeah, I just want to come in and talk to you. 597 00:31:39,560 --> 00:31:40,760 Can you open the gate? 598 00:31:40,770 --> 00:31:44,260 (CLEARS THROAT) Yeah, sure. I'll let you in. 599 00:31:44,390 --> 00:31:46,070 Nice one, nice one. 600 00:32:00,780 --> 00:32:03,020 - Hey. - Hey. 601 00:32:03,040 --> 00:32:04,440 What do you want? 602 00:32:04,440 --> 00:32:06,780 I just want to come in for a bit, dude. 603 00:32:08,410 --> 00:32:10,970 That looks expensive. Is that expensive? 604 00:32:10,990 --> 00:32:12,860 Look, Liam, it's morning, mate. 605 00:32:12,860 --> 00:32:15,140 Fucking hell. Liam. 606 00:32:21,660 --> 00:32:25,260 Jonas, this is a nice place! 607 00:32:28,430 --> 00:32:32,950 Hey. Seriously, man, it's not cool you just walking in like this. 608 00:32:32,960 --> 00:32:35,410 To be honest with you, it's a little bit weird. 609 00:32:35,430 --> 00:32:37,230 Is that a Marrakeshian lamp? 610 00:32:43,100 --> 00:32:45,340 Liam, do I have to call Fi? 611 00:32:46,130 --> 00:32:48,480 Did you guys have a row or something like that? 612 00:32:48,480 --> 00:32:50,380 - Sit down. - No, I'm all right. 613 00:32:50,630 --> 00:32:53,720 Go on, sit down. It's not a bear trap, it's a chair. 614 00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:01,610 Do you want me to bounce this off your fucking head? 615 00:33:05,260 --> 00:33:06,400 (LAUGHS) 616 00:33:06,870 --> 00:33:08,910 I'm joking, Jonas. 617 00:33:09,040 --> 00:33:11,710 Bloody hell, I thought you were supposed to be cool, man. 618 00:33:11,710 --> 00:33:14,470 I thought you were meant to be fucking brilliant. 619 00:33:14,600 --> 00:33:16,310 What's going on? 620 00:33:20,310 --> 00:33:21,650 Yeah, figures. 621 00:33:22,160 --> 00:33:24,730 Get some good stuff for the scrapbook? 622 00:33:26,200 --> 00:33:27,510 I think you should go. 623 00:33:27,860 --> 00:33:29,660 I don't blame you. I would have. 624 00:33:30,500 --> 00:33:32,350 Tell you what, let's have a look. 625 00:33:32,690 --> 00:33:35,270 Go on, chuck it on the screen, don't be shy! 626 00:33:35,570 --> 00:33:36,870 Come on! 627 00:33:37,430 --> 00:33:40,250 I'm fucking joking again, Jonas! 628 00:33:40,540 --> 00:33:44,030 For goodness' sake, you need to grow a sense of humour. 629 00:33:44,270 --> 00:33:46,310 - He's uptight, isn't he? - OK, Liam. 630 00:33:49,340 --> 00:33:51,420 - It's a lovely room, this. - Thank you. 631 00:33:52,600 --> 00:33:55,450 Is this where you masturbate to images of my wife? 632 00:33:56,550 --> 00:34:00,400 - Or do you do it in that room? - OK, Liam, I want you to leave now. 633 00:34:00,520 --> 00:34:03,240 Do you sometimes start in here and then finish in there? 634 00:34:03,240 --> 00:34:05,540 The world's pretty much your oyster, isn't it? 635 00:34:05,560 --> 00:34:06,980 I want you to leave. 636 00:34:12,030 --> 00:34:13,870 Well, that's a pity. 637 00:34:13,940 --> 00:34:16,570 - Come on, mate. - All right, now, what are you doing? 638 00:34:16,580 --> 00:34:18,890 Don't do that. Come on now! 639 00:34:19,270 --> 00:34:21,400 - What are you doing? - What are you doing? 640 00:34:21,400 --> 00:34:25,140 - Jesus! Get out! - Stand up, Jonas, come on! 641 00:35:06,020 --> 00:35:07,030 Hey. 642 00:35:08,040 --> 00:35:09,190 What do you want? 643 00:35:10,880 --> 00:35:15,450 INDECIPHERABLE GIBBERISH 644 00:35:15,830 --> 00:35:17,290 Don't do that. 645 00:35:17,310 --> 00:35:18,750 Come on, Danny! 646 00:35:18,780 --> 00:35:20,540 - 'What are you doing? - 'What are you doing? 647 00:35:20,560 --> 00:35:23,790 'Jesus! Get out, you fucking prick. 648 00:35:23,810 --> 00:35:25,180 'Tell you what... ' 649 00:35:29,030 --> 00:35:30,580 Stop it! 650 00:35:33,020 --> 00:35:34,880 I tell you what you're going to do. 651 00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:37,570 You're going to get every bit of Fion you've got in there 652 00:35:37,570 --> 00:35:40,610 and you're going to select it all and you're going to wipe it! 653 00:35:40,610 --> 00:35:43,340 Hello, police, I'm witnessing a serious assault at five... 654 00:35:44,180 --> 00:35:45,320 'Wipe it! 655 00:35:45,450 --> 00:35:46,540 'Fuck off. 656 00:35:46,540 --> 00:35:48,660 'I don't have a brain chip to show you.' 657 00:35:48,670 --> 00:35:50,830 This is a bottle, right? 658 00:35:50,830 --> 00:35:54,050 Either you wipe it or I will fucking gouge you myself. 659 00:35:54,070 --> 00:35:55,100 Jesus! 660 00:35:55,130 --> 00:35:56,160 OK. 661 00:35:56,610 --> 00:35:58,260 Just do what he says. 662 00:35:59,240 --> 00:36:01,620 Not on your eye, in there. 663 00:36:01,650 --> 00:36:03,170 On there! 664 00:36:03,170 --> 00:36:04,430 He's doing it! 665 00:36:07,430 --> 00:36:09,520 Now, delete it all. The lot! 666 00:36:10,440 --> 00:36:14,590 Or I will crack your skull and I will gouge your fucking neck. 667 00:36:14,720 --> 00:36:16,040 I'm doing it. 668 00:36:24,800 --> 00:36:26,890 Stay away from my house! 669 00:36:38,460 --> 00:36:40,870 'Now, delete it all. The lot! 670 00:36:41,270 --> 00:36:45,630 'Or I will crack your skull and I will gouge your fucking neck. 671 00:36:45,660 --> 00:36:47,040 'I'm doing it.' 672 00:37:33,850 --> 00:37:35,160 Liam? 673 00:37:36,510 --> 00:37:37,870 Where did you go? 674 00:37:42,900 --> 00:37:44,250 What happened? 675 00:37:45,490 --> 00:37:46,650 Liam, what happened? 676 00:37:46,660 --> 00:37:48,430 Did you use a condom or not? 677 00:37:52,180 --> 00:37:53,200 Just say. 678 00:37:55,630 --> 00:37:57,430 Liam, whatever you think... 679 00:37:57,430 --> 00:37:58,770 Am I Jodie's father? 680 00:37:59,920 --> 00:38:01,400 - Liam! - Am I? 681 00:38:01,400 --> 00:38:02,480 Yes, of course. 682 00:38:02,910 --> 00:38:05,360 - You sure about that? - Yes! 683 00:38:06,030 --> 00:38:07,440 That's nice. 684 00:38:11,940 --> 00:38:14,070 I always liked that picture, didn't you? 685 00:38:14,750 --> 00:38:16,410 It's why I bought it for you. 686 00:38:17,260 --> 00:38:20,070 I never liked it. Thought it was pretentious shit. 687 00:38:33,800 --> 00:38:35,400 'I'll tell you what you're going to do. 688 00:38:35,420 --> 00:38:37,420 'You're going to get every bit of Fion... ' 689 00:38:37,420 --> 00:38:38,780 ' Christ, what have you done? 690 00:38:38,780 --> 00:38:39,860 'Select it all... ' 691 00:38:39,860 --> 00:38:41,350 We're getting to the good bit. 692 00:38:41,350 --> 00:38:44,410 'Hello, police, I'm witnessing a serious assault at... ' 693 00:38:50,880 --> 00:38:53,560 'Now, delete it all. The lot! 694 00:38:53,570 --> 00:38:58,200 'Or I will crack your skull and I will gouge your fucking neck.' 695 00:39:07,770 --> 00:39:09,490 18 months ago in this room. 696 00:39:20,830 --> 00:39:22,950 You know when you suspect something, 697 00:39:23,440 --> 00:39:26,150 it's always better when it turns out to be true. 698 00:39:28,100 --> 00:39:31,620 It's like I've had a bad tooth for years and I'm just finally 699 00:39:31,630 --> 00:39:35,250 getting my tongue in there and I'm digging out all the rotten shit. 700 00:39:37,560 --> 00:39:39,040 That's not what it looks like. 701 00:39:39,040 --> 00:39:40,840 Oh, this did Jonas come round to read you a story? 702 00:39:40,840 --> 00:39:41,880 No, it was... 703 00:39:41,880 --> 00:39:43,040 A story about fucking? 704 00:39:43,040 --> 00:39:44,640 It was... 705 00:39:44,640 --> 00:39:47,730 When all the Dan stuff was going on and you'd walked out. 706 00:39:50,780 --> 00:39:51,940 For like ten minutes. 707 00:39:51,940 --> 00:39:53,780 For five days, Liam. 708 00:39:54,580 --> 00:39:56,320 No call, no nothing. 709 00:39:58,860 --> 00:40:01,270 So you fucked him after four days? 710 00:40:01,270 --> 00:40:02,760 That's heroic. 711 00:40:02,760 --> 00:40:06,600 I mean, three days, that's admirable, but four days? 712 00:40:06,600 --> 00:40:08,410 I mean, you must have been gagging. 713 00:40:08,410 --> 00:40:09,930 I was so upset. 714 00:40:12,220 --> 00:40:14,880 We went for a drink, I got drunk. 715 00:40:15,330 --> 00:40:17,120 It shouldn't have happened. 716 00:40:18,330 --> 00:40:19,840 I'm sorry. 717 00:40:21,990 --> 00:40:25,310 I'm so sorry, I can't say anything else. 718 00:40:25,310 --> 00:40:26,590 I love you. 719 00:40:30,200 --> 00:40:31,840 Did you use a condom? 720 00:40:31,840 --> 00:40:33,000 Yes. 721 00:40:33,010 --> 00:40:35,770 Cos we didn't have any here. We were trying. 722 00:40:37,170 --> 00:40:38,410 He had some. 723 00:40:38,410 --> 00:40:40,180 In his pocket? 724 00:40:40,180 --> 00:40:41,560 In his car. 725 00:40:43,280 --> 00:40:45,800 Was it his decision, or did you make him wear one? 726 00:40:45,930 --> 00:40:47,230 I made him. 727 00:40:48,100 --> 00:40:50,280 - And you saw him put it on? - Yes. 728 00:40:50,730 --> 00:40:52,050 Show me, then. 729 00:40:53,740 --> 00:40:55,320 Show me on there. 730 00:41:01,370 --> 00:41:03,210 I need to see it, Fi. 731 00:41:05,340 --> 00:41:06,700 I deleted it. 732 00:41:07,340 --> 00:41:10,300 I wanted it to go away, I wiped the whole thing. 733 00:41:10,430 --> 00:41:11,880 - Did you? - Yeah. 734 00:41:12,010 --> 00:41:14,160 So there's just a blank gap in your timeline? 735 00:41:14,280 --> 00:41:15,730 Yeah. 736 00:41:16,710 --> 00:41:18,120 Show me that, then. 737 00:41:22,120 --> 00:41:23,950 Yeah, OK. 738 00:41:24,810 --> 00:41:26,310 I have to find it. 739 00:41:32,810 --> 00:41:34,800 No! No deleting it, not now. 740 00:41:34,920 --> 00:41:36,870 No, no. 741 00:41:39,960 --> 00:41:41,350 It's still on there, is it? 742 00:41:44,200 --> 00:41:45,540 I'm sorry. 743 00:41:47,820 --> 00:41:49,570 You have to show it to me, Fi. 744 00:41:49,570 --> 00:41:50,770 Why? 745 00:41:50,770 --> 00:41:52,170 Cos I want to see it. 746 00:41:54,690 --> 00:41:56,410 I love you. 747 00:41:57,100 --> 00:41:58,510 Show it to me. 748 00:41:59,380 --> 00:42:01,030 No. 749 00:42:01,030 --> 00:42:02,270 - Show it to me. - No. 750 00:42:02,270 --> 00:42:03,510 - Show it to me! - No! 751 00:42:03,510 --> 00:42:07,080 Show it to me! I want to see! I want to see what he looks like! 752 00:42:09,200 --> 00:42:11,940 This isn't me! Look what you're doing to me! 753 00:42:12,730 --> 00:42:14,630 Fi, I need to see it! 754 00:42:15,600 --> 00:42:16,950 Please. 755 00:42:26,190 --> 00:42:30,190 I need to see it, Fi. 756 00:43:02,870 --> 00:43:04,740 GIGGLING FROM TV SCREEN 757 00:43:04,870 --> 00:43:06,150 'Hurry up. 758 00:43:06,160 --> 00:43:07,430 'Sorry!' 759 00:43:19,270 --> 00:43:22,600 GROANS FROM SCREEN 760 00:43:22,600 --> 00:43:25,970 GROANS AND GIGGLING CONTINUE 761 00:43:27,410 --> 00:43:31,900 HEAVY BREATHING FROM SCREEN 762 00:43:41,030 --> 00:43:44,770 MOANING FROM SCREEN 763 00:43:57,680 --> 00:44:00,080 MUSIC BEGINS TO PLAY 764 00:44:06,610 --> 00:44:07,840 I love you. 765 00:44:08,720 --> 00:44:10,190 I know you do. 766 00:44:14,400 --> 00:44:15,800 BABY'S TOYS TINKLE 767 00:44:15,800 --> 00:44:16,920 Oh! 768 00:44:16,930 --> 00:44:19,650 MOSAIC PLAYS A LULLABY 769 00:44:19,650 --> 00:44:21,000 Hello, stinky! 770 00:45:08,440 --> 00:45:09,710 Hey. 771 00:46:19,450 --> 00:46:23,810 HER GIGGLING PLAYS OVER THE MEMORY 772 00:46:30,260 --> 00:46:33,160 DOOR CREAKS OPEN 773 00:46:33,550 --> 00:46:35,640 Brown or green? 774 00:46:36,340 --> 00:46:37,670 Green?