1
00:00:11,120 --> 00:00:13,295
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

2
00:00:19,040 --> 00:00:20,175
Hello.

3
00:00:20,200 --> 00:00:22,175
Hello, everyone.

4
00:00:22,200 --> 00:00:23,575
Thank you very much.

5
00:00:25,040 --> 00:00:26,895
Thank you so much.
Good evening, everyone,

6
00:00:26,920 --> 00:00:31,095
good evening at home, and welcome
to the Jonathan Ross Christmas Show.

7
00:00:31,120 --> 00:00:32,615
CHEERING

8
00:00:32,640 --> 00:00:34,575
Merry Christmas!

9
00:00:34,600 --> 00:00:36,575
We've got a great festive show
lined up tonight.

10
00:00:36,600 --> 00:00:38,295
Let's have a look
at who's in my greenroom.

11
00:00:38,320 --> 00:00:39,855
We have a BAFTA-winning chef,

12
00:00:39,880 --> 00:00:42,295
who is also a brilliant rapper.
It's Big Zuu.

13
00:00:42,320 --> 00:00:44,055
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

14
00:00:44,080 --> 00:00:46,055
Yeah, yeah!

15
00:00:50,680 --> 00:00:53,775
Alongside Zuu,
another BAFTA-winning chef,

16
00:00:53,800 --> 00:00:57,215
who's a terrible rapper.
It's Gordon Ramsay.

17
00:00:57,240 --> 00:00:59,215
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

18
00:01:00,960 --> 00:01:04,215
Hopefully, he'll be spitting
some bars for us later on.

19
00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:06,935
I'm thrilled she's on the show.

20
00:01:06,960 --> 00:01:08,775
She's one of my favourite actors
of all time.

21
00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:11,375
The fabulous Minnie Driver is here,
ladies and gentlemen.

22
00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:13,535
Amazing to have you on the show.

23
00:01:13,560 --> 00:01:15,815
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

24
00:01:15,840 --> 00:01:18,135
A special treat for you.
We've got the singing superstar

25
00:01:18,160 --> 00:01:20,455
who'll be chatting and performing
at the end of the show.

26
00:01:20,480 --> 00:01:23,295
The one and only Adam Lambert is
with us, everybody.

27
00:01:23,320 --> 00:01:26,135
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
Looking amazing, as always.

28
00:01:26,160 --> 00:01:28,335
And I'm super excited.

29
00:01:28,360 --> 00:01:31,935
One of the nation's most successful
and best loved comedians,

30
00:01:31,960 --> 00:01:33,815
the fabulous Michael McIntyre.

31
00:01:33,840 --> 00:01:36,575
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
There he is.

32
00:01:36,600 --> 00:01:38,055
Who doesn't love that face?

33
00:01:38,080 --> 00:01:39,415
I love that face.

34
00:01:40,520 --> 00:01:44,215
OK, so, before we get to that,
I love Christmas.

35
00:01:44,240 --> 00:01:46,415
I love the excuse to dress
a bit festive.

36
00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:49,295
But no-one wants to go out on
Christmas Eve to be greeted by this.

37
00:01:50,760 --> 00:01:52,855
LAUGHTER

38
00:01:57,000 --> 00:01:59,415
And you know, the awful thing is,
if he turns around,

39
00:01:59,440 --> 00:02:01,335
you'll find another carrot
round the back.

40
00:02:01,360 --> 00:02:02,495
LAUGHTER

41
00:02:02,520 --> 00:02:05,575
Gordon, is that the correct way
to use a root vegetable?

42
00:02:05,600 --> 00:02:07,335
LAUGHTER

43
00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:09,175
No, definitely not, no.

44
00:02:09,200 --> 00:02:10,735
Please.

45
00:02:10,760 --> 00:02:13,015
Obviously, they know
they're wearing novelty jumpers.

46
00:02:13,040 --> 00:02:14,815
That's the point.
They're wearing the jumper

47
00:02:14,840 --> 00:02:16,175
and trying to cheer people up.

48
00:02:16,200 --> 00:02:18,335
But I've got a feeling
someone gave this lady a jumper

49
00:02:18,360 --> 00:02:19,695
and she didn't check it properly.

50
00:02:19,720 --> 00:02:21,335
Cos I don't think she knows...

51
00:02:21,360 --> 00:02:23,375
LAUGHTER

52
00:02:23,400 --> 00:02:24,975
I don't think she's aware.

53
00:02:27,880 --> 00:02:30,175
That explains why Rudolph has
a shiny nose, of course.

54
00:02:30,200 --> 00:02:31,735
LAUGHTER

55
00:02:31,760 --> 00:02:33,775
But my all-time favourite
is this guy,

56
00:02:33,800 --> 00:02:36,295
who chose a jumper to show off
his six-pack. Look at this.

57
00:02:37,720 --> 00:02:39,415
AUDIENCE GROAN

58
00:02:39,440 --> 00:02:41,935
Yeah, that's put you off
your sprouts, hasn't it?

59
00:02:41,960 --> 00:02:43,375
And if you could see further down,

60
00:02:43,400 --> 00:02:45,655
you'd see he's wrapped his presents
under the tree too.

61
00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:48,855
Completes the look. Shall we get
on the show, ladies and gentlemen?

62
00:02:48,880 --> 00:02:50,215
AUDIENCE: Yes!
Why don't we?

63
00:02:50,240 --> 00:02:51,535
Let's get my first guests out.

64
00:02:51,560 --> 00:02:54,255
It's the fabulous Minnie Driver
and Michael McIntyre.

65
00:02:54,280 --> 00:02:56,375
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

66
00:03:10,320 --> 00:03:12,655
APPLAUSE DROWNS SPEECH

67
00:03:15,560 --> 00:03:18,135
Hello, Jonathan.
How lovely to see you.

68
00:03:18,160 --> 00:03:20,615
Hello.
So pleased to see you both.

69
00:03:20,640 --> 00:03:22,255
You've been in America
for how long now?

70
00:03:22,280 --> 00:03:23,575
26 years.

71
00:03:23,600 --> 00:03:25,495
26 years!
Yeah, a long time.

72
00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:27,455
So, you're used
to an American Christmas then.

73
00:03:27,480 --> 00:03:30,335
I'm used to an Am... But we'd always
come back here for Christmas.

74
00:03:30,360 --> 00:03:32,095
That was our big holiday.

75
00:03:32,120 --> 00:03:35,055
Ancl now, I'm actually gonna be
in California for Christmas.

76
00:03:35,080 --> 00:03:36,415
So, a California Christmas...

77
00:03:36,440 --> 00:03:38,215
It wouldn't be turkey
and all the trimmings?

78
00:03:38,240 --> 00:03:39,415
100% turkey.

79
00:03:39,440 --> 00:03:41,775
Really, even over there?
Yes, my brother cooks the turkey

80
00:03:41,800 --> 00:03:44,175
and I'll be cooking
all the other bits.

81
00:03:44,200 --> 00:03:46,135
So, you'll have a version
of an English Christmas

82
00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:47,655
but in the sunshine?

83
00:03:47,680 --> 00:03:48,815
Yes.
26 years is

84
00:03:48,840 --> 00:03:50,695
a big chunk of your life.
Yeah, it is.

85
00:03:50,720 --> 00:03:53,535
It's your whole adult life.
Yes, so it must be kind of weird.

86
00:03:53,560 --> 00:03:55,375
Is it a nostalgia thing

87
00:03:55,400 --> 00:03:58,295
when you come back here, or do you
still feel like this is home?

88
00:03:58,320 --> 00:04:00,215
No, 100% it's home. I love being

89
00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:02,815
in both places. I think
it's been a proper identity thing

90
00:04:02,840 --> 00:04:06,895
for so many years,
is that I'm fundamentally British,

91
00:04:06,920 --> 00:04:10,775
but the career that I was sort of
really lucky to have

92
00:04:10,800 --> 00:04:12,095
was offered there.

93
00:04:12,120 --> 00:04:15,495
Movies and the big TV shows are over
there. Of course they are.

94
00:04:15,520 --> 00:04:16,655
Yeah, I mean...

95
00:04:16,680 --> 00:04:18,415
But now, you know,
there's amazing films

96
00:04:18,440 --> 00:04:20,095
and television here.

97
00:04:20,120 --> 00:04:21,975
It was just,
at that particular moment,

98
00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:24,375
the things that I was encouraged
to do were there.

99
00:04:24,400 --> 00:04:26,215
But also, speaking of TV,
there could not be

100
00:04:26,240 --> 00:04:28,375
a bigger TV star in this country...
Well, maybe.

101
00:04:28,400 --> 00:04:29,655
We've got two on the show tonight.

102
00:04:29,680 --> 00:04:31,855
But certainly, Michael McIntyre.

103
00:04:31,880 --> 00:04:34,495
What an enormous talent.
Oh, you're introducing me again.

104
00:04:34,520 --> 00:04:37,375
Seriously. Because...
APPLAUSE

105
00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:40,135
The Big Show is amazing.

106
00:04:40,160 --> 00:04:42,295
I'm doing the pointing thing,
like a politician.

107
00:04:42,320 --> 00:04:44,215
I'm just pointing. It works.

108
00:04:44,240 --> 00:04:45,655
It really is amazing.

109
00:04:45,680 --> 00:04:47,575
LAUGHTER

110
00:04:49,240 --> 00:04:50,255
Hello.

111
00:04:50,280 --> 00:04:51,775
Would you ever go into politics?

112
00:04:51,800 --> 00:04:52,975
Politics?
Yeah.

113
00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:55,255
Oh, my goodness. Um... I don't know.

114
00:04:55,280 --> 00:04:57,535
Well, let's be honest.
The people that are in politics,

115
00:04:57,560 --> 00:04:59,935
it doesn't seem
like it's the most difficult job.

116
00:04:59,960 --> 00:05:01,415
I mean, they don't give it
their all.

117
00:05:01,440 --> 00:05:04,015
No. We've had to follow politics,
haven't we, this year?

118
00:05:04,040 --> 00:05:05,135
Yes.

119
00:05:05,160 --> 00:05:06,935
I get very confused
with the reshuffling.

120
00:05:06,960 --> 00:05:08,695
We've had them all year. They'll go,

121
00:05:08,720 --> 00:05:10,895
"The money guy..."
Ancl he's, like, "I was getting

122
00:05:10,920 --> 00:05:13,295
"into the money, working it out."
"You're not money any more.

123
00:05:13,320 --> 00:05:15,495
"Now, you're on defence."
Ancl he's, like, "What?

124
00:05:15,520 --> 00:05:17,015
"I don't know anything
about defence."

125
00:05:17,040 --> 00:05:18,895
Ancl then, the guy on defence,
"What am I doing?"

126
00:05:18,920 --> 00:05:21,095
"You're in hospitals."
"I'm going to hospital?"

127
00:05:21,120 --> 00:05:23,935
"You're in charge of it." "But I've
just been learning about defence."

128
00:05:23,960 --> 00:05:25,535
You can't keep just switching
the jobs.

129
00:05:25,560 --> 00:05:27,415
I can't call my accountant and say,

130
00:05:27,440 --> 00:05:30,055
"You're no longer my accountant.
You're my gardener.

131
00:05:30,080 --> 00:05:32,295
"I'm having a reshuffle."
LAUGHTER

132
00:05:32,320 --> 00:05:34,575
"No, you're not my doctor any more.

133
00:05:34,600 --> 00:05:36,175
"You're my dog groomer."

134
00:05:36,200 --> 00:05:37,615
Yeah.
It's reshuffle time.

135
00:05:37,640 --> 00:05:39,015
See, it already sounds to me like

136
00:05:39,040 --> 00:05:42,175
you would know more than they do.
You're very good in charge.

137
00:05:42,200 --> 00:05:43,975
This is what happens.

138
00:05:44,000 --> 00:05:46,615
And Matt Hancock,
he was in charge of the health.

139
00:05:46,640 --> 00:05:48,015
I know, and now look where he is.

140
00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:50,055
He's eating camel cocks.
I don't understand.

141
00:05:50,080 --> 00:05:52,255
Were you voting for him?
Who was voting for this man?

142
00:05:52,280 --> 00:05:54,455
People wanted to see him suffer,
that's why.

143
00:05:54,480 --> 00:05:55,935
Did you see I'm A Celebrity?

144
00:05:55,960 --> 00:05:57,735
They all started doing impressions
of me.

145
00:05:57,760 --> 00:05:58,815
Did you see it?

146
00:05:58,840 --> 00:06:00,455
AUDIENCE: Yes.
I couldn't believe it.

147
00:06:00,480 --> 00:06:02,895
I turned the TV on and Seann Walsh
was teaching everybody,

148
00:06:02,920 --> 00:06:05,615
and he was going,
"Would you like a cup of tea?

149
00:06:05,640 --> 00:06:07,175
"Would you like a cup of tea?"

150
00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:10,455
Ancl then, Matt Hancock was going,
"Would you like a cup of tea?

151
00:06:10,480 --> 00:06:13,695
"Would you like a cup of tea?"
He sounds like that anyway.

152
00:06:13,720 --> 00:06:15,335
I was watching with my son, going,

153
00:06:15,360 --> 00:06:17,215
"Dad, you do it."
And then, I did it.

154
00:06:17,240 --> 00:06:19,175
I was, like,
"Would you like a cup of tea?"

155
00:06:19,200 --> 00:06:21,015
LAUGHTER

156
00:06:21,040 --> 00:06:23,015
Ancl then, he went,
"Oh, that's amazing!"

157
00:06:23,040 --> 00:06:25,895
I was, like, "I know it's amazing.
I am him!"

158
00:06:25,920 --> 00:06:29,095
He said, "Mum, Mum, Dad does this
so well. Do it again."

159
00:06:29,120 --> 00:06:32,095
Would you like a cup of tea?

160
00:06:32,120 --> 00:06:34,295
It was one of the most surreal
20 minutes of my life.

161
00:06:34,320 --> 00:06:35,775
Ancl Ant and Dec wouldn't let it go.

162
00:06:35,800 --> 00:06:36,895
Yeah.
They kept going,

163
00:06:36,920 --> 00:06:39,415
"Back to camp now with more
Michael McIntyre impressions."

164
00:06:39,440 --> 00:06:41,135
They were all at it again.
Jill Scott.

165
00:06:41,160 --> 00:06:42,455
"Would you like a cup of tea?"

166
00:06:42,480 --> 00:06:44,255
Well, it was very funny.

167
00:06:44,280 --> 00:06:46,695
It must have been nice, though.
You must have been

168
00:06:46,720 --> 00:06:48,135
quite pleased.
I did like it.

169
00:06:48,160 --> 00:06:49,255
Yes.
No, I liked it.

170
00:06:49,280 --> 00:06:51,935
Yeah. Now, Minnie has a book out

171
00:06:51,960 --> 00:06:54,615
just in time for Christmas, and
it's called... And you talk about

172
00:06:54,640 --> 00:06:58,295
your love of swimming, your love
of the sea, your love of surfing.

173
00:06:58,320 --> 00:06:59,935
It is called Managing Expectations.

174
00:06:59,960 --> 00:07:02,735
It's beautifully written as well.
I mean, it really is. So, why...?

175
00:07:02,760 --> 00:07:06,655
And it's sort of an autobiography,
but not purely that, is it?

176
00:07:06,680 --> 00:07:08,935
No, it's a collection of...

177
00:07:08,960 --> 00:07:13,255
It's a collection of stories
that are sort of like a memoir.

178
00:07:13,280 --> 00:07:16,855
Ancl there was time during Covid
to write it,

179
00:07:16,880 --> 00:07:19,895
so... I don't know.
What did you do in Covid?

180
00:07:19,920 --> 00:07:21,335
Well, I ate a lot.

181
00:07:21,360 --> 00:07:24,095
Yes, I did that too.
I had that situation with,

182
00:07:24,120 --> 00:07:27,415
um... with some chocolate...

183
00:07:27,440 --> 00:07:29,415
LAUGHTER

184
00:07:29,440 --> 00:07:33,095
...that went on for a while. Whenever
my family weren't in the kitchen,

185
00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:36,335
I would go to the treat area

186
00:07:36,360 --> 00:07:38,175
and I would...

187
00:07:38,200 --> 00:07:40,615
It was chocolate that was not
intended for one person.

188
00:07:40,640 --> 00:07:43,655
It was sort of family size.

189
00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:45,535
A sharing bag.

190
00:07:45,560 --> 00:07:48,455
Yes. Well, no, it was a long block,
like a rectangle.

191
00:07:48,480 --> 00:07:50,655
So, I would take a row

192
00:07:50,680 --> 00:07:52,695
and I would go.
I would go with my row.

193
00:07:52,720 --> 00:07:55,175
Ancl I would feel good about the fact
that I was having one row.

194
00:07:55,200 --> 00:07:56,695
Ancl then, I would eat it

195
00:07:56,720 --> 00:07:58,415
and then, soon as it was over,

196
00:07:58,440 --> 00:08:00,615
I would get deeply sad.
Yeah.

197
00:08:00,640 --> 00:08:03,735
And then, I would look at my body,
if any shards had fallen.

198
00:08:05,160 --> 00:08:06,935
Ancl I would eat from myself.

199
00:08:06,960 --> 00:08:08,095
Ancl then, I would return,

200
00:08:08,120 --> 00:08:10,175
and then, I would take another row.

201
00:08:10,200 --> 00:08:13,975
Ancl this process would continue
until I'd gone beyond halfway,

202
00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:16,375
where I realised
I had a decision to make.

203
00:08:16,400 --> 00:08:18,175
Cos I knew I'm now in trouble.

204
00:08:18,200 --> 00:08:21,415
My wife is gonna see
that I've had 60% of it.

205
00:08:21,440 --> 00:08:24,135
And I would conclude the best thing
to do is to finish

206
00:08:24,160 --> 00:08:26,335
the whole thing...
Ancl then it's gone.

207
00:08:26,360 --> 00:08:28,735
...and then hide the evidence
so it becomes

208
00:08:28,760 --> 00:08:30,695
a domestic mystery.
Smart.

209
00:08:30,720 --> 00:08:33,255
So, I would bury wrappers
deep in the bin.

210
00:08:33,280 --> 00:08:35,895
You can't put it on the top
because she will see it.

211
00:08:35,920 --> 00:08:37,695
So, I spent a lot of lockdown
burying...

212
00:08:37,720 --> 00:08:39,175
Chocolate wrappers.

213
00:08:39,200 --> 00:08:42,175
Ancl sometimes, I'd pass previous
wrappers and go, "Oh, I remember.

214
00:08:42,200 --> 00:08:45,215
"Yummy!" Sometimes, there'd be
nothing in the bin

215
00:08:45,240 --> 00:08:47,855
and I would create rubbish
from fruit

216
00:08:47,880 --> 00:08:49,815
and pile it on top.

217
00:08:49,840 --> 00:08:53,615
Anyway, this went on for a while
and I was - let's be honest -

218
00:08:53,640 --> 00:08:57,455
I was spreading. And then, one clay,
I went to get some chocolate

219
00:08:57,480 --> 00:08:59,855
and there was, like,
this petty cash box.

220
00:08:59,880 --> 00:09:02,375
I don't even know... My wife
must've ordered it or something.

221
00:09:02,400 --> 00:09:04,375
Ancl it had a lock on it.
It was locked.

222
00:09:04,400 --> 00:09:06,695
Ancl she'd put all the chocolate
into the thing.

223
00:09:06,720 --> 00:09:09,455
I'm, like,
"Darling, where's the chocolate?"

224
00:09:09,480 --> 00:09:11,815
She'd put me into chocdown.
I was in chocdown.

225
00:09:11,840 --> 00:09:14,095
I was in chocdown in lockdown.

226
00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:15,975
That's humiliating.
I know. I said,

227
00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:18,415
"What have you clone?" She said,
"We had to slow the spread."

228
00:09:18,440 --> 00:09:19,615
I'm, like, "Of the virus?"

229
00:09:19,640 --> 00:09:20,855
"No, of your stomach."

230
00:09:20,880 --> 00:09:22,655
LAUGHTER

231
00:09:22,680 --> 00:09:26,255
That's the real tragedy of Covid
right there.

232
00:09:26,280 --> 00:09:28,615
You know what I love about the book?

233
00:09:28,640 --> 00:09:30,935
There's so many...
It's so revealing about you.

234
00:09:30,960 --> 00:09:32,375
There's so much about your life,

235
00:09:32,400 --> 00:09:34,175
but I was surprised
because you talk about

236
00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:35,575
some of your early film roles.

237
00:09:35,600 --> 00:09:37,175
Yes.
And I never thought of you...

238
00:09:37,200 --> 00:09:38,895
When I saw you on screen,
I always thought

239
00:09:38,920 --> 00:09:40,095
you're so good

240
00:09:40,120 --> 00:09:41,975
and you're so confident.
I didn't realise

241
00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:44,175
there were nerves.
You had the same sort of things

242
00:09:44,200 --> 00:09:46,015
that anyone starting out
goes through.

243
00:09:46,040 --> 00:09:48,575
Tell me about the first time
you worked with Robert De Niro.

244
00:09:48,600 --> 00:09:53,735
So, there's this movie, Sleepers,
which had, um, you know,

245
00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:55,775
Brad Pitt, Dustin Hoffman,

246
00:09:55,800 --> 00:09:57,215
Robert De Niro...

247
00:09:57,240 --> 00:09:59,015
Amazing cast.
..Bruno Kirby,

248
00:09:59,040 --> 00:10:00,695
Jason Patric...

249
00:10:00,720 --> 00:10:02,255
Really amazing people.

250
00:10:02,280 --> 00:10:04,815
Ancl I was in a scene
with Robert De Niro,

251
00:10:04,840 --> 00:10:06,375
and I didn't actually have a line,

252
00:10:06,400 --> 00:10:09,935
and he gave me one of his lines,

253
00:10:09,960 --> 00:10:14,335
which was a bit like receiving
communion,

254
00:10:14,360 --> 00:10:17,255
or an actor's version of communion.
And this was him saying,

255
00:10:17,280 --> 00:10:18,895
"I want you to be in the scene,"

256
00:10:18,920 --> 00:10:21,175
essentially.
Exactly. Ancl everyone calls him Bob,

257
00:10:21,200 --> 00:10:24,575
which felt completely impossible
to call Robert De Niro "Bob".

258
00:10:24,600 --> 00:10:26,535
Ancl I couldn't call him Mr De Niro

259
00:10:26,560 --> 00:10:30,215
cos I'd heard him say to someone
that that was his clad. And then...

260
00:10:30,240 --> 00:10:33,655
So, I just used to cough before
I'd speak to him cos I so nervous.

261
00:10:33,680 --> 00:10:35,415
I'd just be, like...
COUGHS

262
00:10:35,440 --> 00:10:38,575
Are we gonna rehearse the scene
before lunch, do you think?

263
00:10:38,600 --> 00:10:43,095
Ancl when we wrapped,
he gave me a really big box

264
00:10:43,120 --> 00:10:44,775
of cough drops and he was, like...

265
00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:48,055
AMERICAN ACCENT: "I sure hope
you get that cough sorted out

266
00:10:48,080 --> 00:10:50,415
"because it's bad for you."

267
00:10:50,440 --> 00:10:51,815
Have you worked with him since?

268
00:10:51,840 --> 00:10:54,095
No. But he's so...

269
00:10:54,120 --> 00:10:56,055
He is exactly what you...

270
00:10:56,080 --> 00:10:59,735
Very few of those icons, I think,
are that way,

271
00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:01,895
but he is exactly
what you would imagine.

272
00:11:01,920 --> 00:11:04,575
He is very Robert De Niro-ish.

273
00:11:04,600 --> 00:11:09,135
He is sort of stern and clever
and kind and quite terrifying.

274
00:11:09,160 --> 00:11:11,615
But to work with him,
especially early in your career,

275
00:11:11,640 --> 00:11:13,855
what an amazing experience.
Yeah, it was incredible.

276
00:11:13,880 --> 00:11:16,255
It was really amazing.
I wrote about that quite a lot,

277
00:11:16,280 --> 00:11:18,015
and it was fun to write about it
in the book.

278
00:11:18,040 --> 00:11:20,575
But there's also an amazing story
in the book about how you met,

279
00:11:20,600 --> 00:11:23,375
or how you first got close
with your partner.

280
00:11:23,400 --> 00:11:24,935
Yes.

281
00:11:24,960 --> 00:11:27,335
So, the Woolsey Fires,
which were in 2018,

282
00:11:27,360 --> 00:11:31,655
and they wiped out, um,
hundreds of thousands of acres,

283
00:11:31,680 --> 00:11:33,975
and thousands and thousands
of people lost their homes

284
00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:35,495
in California.

285
00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:39,775
Ancl they wound up on my street,
where I live in Malibu.

286
00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:42,815
Ancl there were two retired firemen,

287
00:11:42,840 --> 00:11:45,895
and they refused to evacuate.
They stayed. When you leave

288
00:11:45,920 --> 00:11:47,535
the fire department in California,

289
00:11:47,560 --> 00:11:50,215
you get given a fire hose,
not a gold watch.

290
00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:54,975
So, they flagged down a passing
engine, opened the hydrants,

291
00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:56,575
and they fought the fire,

292
00:11:56,600 --> 00:11:59,255
and they basically saved
our little tiny community.

293
00:11:59,280 --> 00:12:01,495
Wow, with their retirement hoses.
Yeah.

294
00:12:01,520 --> 00:12:03,175
Amazing.
With their retirement hoses.

295
00:12:03,200 --> 00:12:05,375
You'd have thought
they would just be for show,

296
00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:07,615
but they were actually
fully functioning hoses.

297
00:12:07,640 --> 00:12:09,975
Yeah, they had old nozzles as well
that they'd collected.

298
00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:11,695
You don't hear...
That feels like a movie.

299
00:12:11,720 --> 00:12:12,975
Yeah.
It could be a movie.

300
00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:15,895
The old firemen come out
of retirement to save the community.

301
00:12:15,920 --> 00:12:19,095
So, my boyfriend isn't
an old fireman...

302
00:12:19,120 --> 00:12:22,135
LAUGHTER
..but I was, um...

303
00:12:22,160 --> 00:12:23,775
You couldn't get
into where we lived.

304
00:12:23,800 --> 00:12:25,775
People had been looting houses,

305
00:12:25,800 --> 00:12:28,175
so the coastguard had issued
a no ship-to-shore,

306
00:12:28,200 --> 00:12:29,655
so you couldn't get in by boat,

307
00:12:29,680 --> 00:12:32,175
even with proof
that you lived there.

308
00:12:32,200 --> 00:12:36,495
Ancl these guys were living
on one FEMA meal a clay,

309
00:12:36,520 --> 00:12:38,215
which is like an emergency meal.

310
00:12:38,240 --> 00:12:41,895
So, I had hatched this plan
to get a boat,

311
00:12:41,920 --> 00:12:44,095
and the boat was gonna be full of...

312
00:12:44,120 --> 00:12:45,615
well, WAS full of gasoline

313
00:12:45,640 --> 00:12:48,135
and chocolate, booze
and cigarettes and things.

314
00:12:48,160 --> 00:12:49,895
Why are you taking gasoline
to a fire?

315
00:12:49,920 --> 00:12:52,135
LAUGHTER
Because the generators,

316
00:12:52,160 --> 00:12:53,815
there was no power.

317
00:12:53,840 --> 00:12:57,735
So, anyway, I had to launch
a sea-based incursion.

318
00:12:57,760 --> 00:12:59,695
So, you were like
a rescue operation?

319
00:12:59,720 --> 00:13:02,495
Well, yeah,
except kind of on pain of arrest

320
00:13:02,520 --> 00:13:04,095
and no-one would go with me.

321
00:13:04,120 --> 00:13:06,855
So, I called up all the people
that I knew who weren't my mates,

322
00:13:06,880 --> 00:13:10,175
and there was this one guy who...
I knew he made documentaries

323
00:13:10,200 --> 00:13:11,535
in places of conflict,

324
00:13:11,560 --> 00:13:14,655
and I'd met him one time
a few years before.

325
00:13:14,680 --> 00:13:16,015
Ancl I called him up

326
00:13:16,040 --> 00:13:19,375
and was, like, "Will you do
this weird thing with me?"

327
00:13:19,400 --> 00:13:21,895
Ancl there was a big silence
and he was, like, "Um...

328
00:13:23,040 --> 00:13:26,255
"OK." And Addison showed up

329
00:13:26,280 --> 00:13:29,815
with a satellite phone
and a bag of snacks,

330
00:13:29,840 --> 00:13:32,255
which I thought was...
I thought that was quite hard.

331
00:13:32,280 --> 00:13:34,175
That's an amazing kind of
first date story.

332
00:13:34,200 --> 00:13:35,575
Yeah, it was really good.

333
00:13:35,600 --> 00:13:38,095
Michael, how did you meet Kitty?
What was your first date like?

334
00:13:38,120 --> 00:13:39,935
Basically, I was at university-ish,

335
00:13:39,960 --> 00:13:41,695
in the sense that I'd got
into university

336
00:13:41,720 --> 00:13:43,855
but wasn't really going
to much of the lessons.

337
00:13:43,880 --> 00:13:45,055
I was sort of working the bar.

338
00:13:45,080 --> 00:13:47,935
Ancl I wanted to get into comedy
in some way,

339
00:13:47,960 --> 00:13:53,575
so I wrote a film, a romantic
comedy, which was basically...

340
00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:55,175
The plot was basically me

341
00:13:55,200 --> 00:13:58,415
writing what I wish would happen
in my life, cos I was single

342
00:13:58,440 --> 00:14:01,775
and I had very little action
of any sort with ladies.

343
00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:04,135
I wasn't very good with girls.
So, I sat

344
00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:06,015
and wrote how I wished
my life would go,

345
00:14:06,040 --> 00:14:08,335
and I had this main character,
who was called Marty

346
00:14:08,360 --> 00:14:10,375
instead of Michael,

347
00:14:10,400 --> 00:14:12,895
and he basically gets the girl
at the end.

348
00:14:12,920 --> 00:14:15,655
It was a sweet story. It was based
in Edinburgh, where I was.

349
00:14:15,680 --> 00:14:17,935
I was watching a lot of Woody Allen
at the time.

350
00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:20,255
It was inspired by that.
I was, like, 20 years old.

351
00:14:20,280 --> 00:14:24,255
Anyway, in parallel to this,
my wife was doing a similar thing,

352
00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:26,535
where she was getting into acting.

353
00:14:26,560 --> 00:14:29,135
Her family are actors,
but she hadn't really clone anything,

354
00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:30,535
things weren't going very well.

355
00:14:30,560 --> 00:14:32,495
So, I was sort of pretending
to be a screenwriter,

356
00:14:32,520 --> 00:14:34,055
she was pretending to be an actress.

357
00:14:34,080 --> 00:14:37,055
My sister met her through a friend,
and the next time she saw me,

358
00:14:37,080 --> 00:14:39,015
she said, "Oh, my God..."

359
00:14:39,040 --> 00:14:41,375
Cos my sister had been helping
with the script.

360
00:14:41,400 --> 00:14:44,215
She said, "I met the girl
from your movie.

361
00:14:44,240 --> 00:14:47,015
"I've met the girl. She's exactly
the same." I'd created this girl.

362
00:14:47,040 --> 00:14:49,815
So, as you'd described her.
Yes.

363
00:14:49,840 --> 00:14:51,575
"And guess what, she's an actress."

364
00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:53,655
So, we had this hilarious meeting,

365
00:14:53,680 --> 00:14:56,895
where I was pretending to be
a really cool writer

366
00:14:56,920 --> 00:14:58,535
and she was pretending
to be an actress,

367
00:14:58,560 --> 00:15:00,215
and now, we've been married

368
00:15:00,240 --> 00:15:02,895
for 20 years.
That's so sweet. That's so lovely.

369
00:15:02,920 --> 00:15:05,415
That is the sweetest...
I created her.

370
00:15:06,840 --> 00:15:09,735
OK, the exciting news is, if you're
a fan of Michael McIntyre -

371
00:15:09,760 --> 00:15:11,095
and I'm sure you all are -

372
00:15:11,120 --> 00:15:13,135
the Big Show is back,
ladies and gentlemen.

373
00:15:13,160 --> 00:15:15,335
The Big Show, baby!
The Big Show is back.

374
00:15:15,360 --> 00:15:17,655
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

375
00:15:17,680 --> 00:15:20,935
It's been off for longer
than I thought.

376
00:15:20,960 --> 00:15:23,135
Cos you stopped doing it
during lockdown, didn't you?

377
00:15:23,160 --> 00:15:24,695
Yeah, it's three years.

378
00:15:24,720 --> 00:15:27,335
We couldn't make the show for
three years because of, obviously,

379
00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:29,015
all these variants popping up

380
00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:30,935
and people not being
in the theatre together.

381
00:15:30,960 --> 00:15:33,535
So, we finally brought it back
and we've finished it.

382
00:15:33,560 --> 00:15:35,095
You are on it.

383
00:15:35,120 --> 00:15:36,775
I had a great time.
I took your phone.

384
00:15:36,800 --> 00:15:37,895
Yeah.

385
00:15:37,920 --> 00:15:39,455
It was hilarious.
He does this thing,

386
00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:42,295
where he takes the phone
and sends a text to everyone.

387
00:15:42,320 --> 00:15:44,215
But of course, I didn't realise,
you panic

388
00:15:44,240 --> 00:15:45,615
that no-one's gonna respond,

389
00:15:45,640 --> 00:15:48,175
that no-one will get back to you.
Yeah.

390
00:15:48,200 --> 00:15:49,815
Fortunately,
we got some good replies.

391
00:15:49,840 --> 00:15:52,135
You got some amazing replies.
But I'm slightly annoyed.

392
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:54,615
You got even better replies
after the show had finished,

393
00:15:54,640 --> 00:15:55,935
from really big celebrities.

394
00:15:55,960 --> 00:15:58,095
I'm still getting people asking me
about that rash.

395
00:15:58,120 --> 00:15:59,615
Yeah, it's a funny one.

396
00:15:59,640 --> 00:16:01,615
It's a great show, yeah.
Have a look at this.

397
00:16:01,640 --> 00:16:03,415
Now, what's going on here, Alison?

398
00:16:03,440 --> 00:16:06,335
Oh, it really brings me a lot
of sadness, to be honest with you.

399
00:16:06,360 --> 00:16:07,615
Oh.

400
00:16:07,640 --> 00:16:09,815
Because I loved this scarf.
Yeah, beautiful scarf.

401
00:16:09,840 --> 00:16:13,055
And I went on holiday, and you know
when you're on the flight

402
00:16:13,080 --> 00:16:14,935
and you use the facilities...
Yeah.

403
00:16:14,960 --> 00:16:16,855
And then, I flushed the toilet

404
00:16:16,880 --> 00:16:20,095
and the toilet's sucked up my scarf.

405
00:16:20,120 --> 00:16:21,775
LAUGHTER

406
00:16:21,800 --> 00:16:24,255
And that's the last picture
I've got of that scarf.

407
00:16:24,280 --> 00:16:25,935
And I cannot find it anywhere.

408
00:16:25,960 --> 00:16:27,735
This is the last picture?
The last picture.

409
00:16:27,760 --> 00:16:29,415
Surely you can buy another one,
Alison.

410
00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:31,655
No, you can't find it anywhere.
I've tried.

411
00:16:31,680 --> 00:16:33,215
You've actually looked
for the scarf?

412
00:16:33,240 --> 00:16:35,575
Yeah, I couldn't find it.
I was devastated.

413
00:16:35,600 --> 00:16:37,735
Is this you looking?
Yes.

414
00:16:37,760 --> 00:16:39,055
LAUGHTER

415
00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:44,855
APPLAUSE

416
00:16:44,880 --> 00:16:47,095
It's been such a...

417
00:16:47,120 --> 00:16:49,055
We should just say,
the Big Show is back

418
00:16:49,080 --> 00:16:51,495
in January on Saturday nights
on BBC One.

419
00:16:51,520 --> 00:16:53,655
January on Saturday nights.
It's been so, so fun

420
00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:55,135
making it after all this time.

421
00:16:55,160 --> 00:16:57,175
The theatre,
the atmosphere's been incredible.

422
00:16:57,200 --> 00:16:59,375
It's a great show.
We're gonna take a break,

423
00:16:59,400 --> 00:17:01,135
but don't go anywhere
because Gordon Ramsay

424
00:17:01,160 --> 00:17:03,055
and Big Zuu will be joining
Minnie and Michael

425
00:17:03,080 --> 00:17:05,215
in just a couple of minutes.
See you after the break.

426
00:17:05,240 --> 00:17:07,055
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

427
00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:19,575
Welcome back to the show.

428
00:17:19,600 --> 00:17:21,135
Let's get my next guests out.

429
00:17:21,160 --> 00:17:24,055
I'm thrilled they're here.
It's Gordon Ramsay and Big Zuu.

430
00:17:24,080 --> 00:17:25,415
Come on out, guys.

431
00:17:25,440 --> 00:17:27,535
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

432
00:17:34,560 --> 00:17:36,855
APPLAUSE DROWNS SPEECH

433
00:17:41,560 --> 00:17:43,935
How are you doing? Good to see you
again. Sit down, sit down.

434
00:17:43,960 --> 00:17:45,255
Thank you very much.

435
00:17:45,280 --> 00:17:47,455
Great to have you here.
Likewise. Good to be back.

436
00:17:47,480 --> 00:17:49,935
Ramsay, you must be a nightmare
at Christmas.

437
00:17:49,960 --> 00:17:53,055
Can you imagine trying to buy
Gordon Ramsay a present?

438
00:17:53,080 --> 00:17:55,295
Oh.
Do you give people a steer

439
00:17:55,320 --> 00:17:57,815
on what they're gonna get you?
Cos how many kids have you got?

440
00:17:57,840 --> 00:17:58,975
You've got about 13

441
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:00,255
or something like that?
Five.

442
00:18:00,280 --> 00:18:02,455
How many have you got? Five?
It's like this sofa

443
00:18:02,480 --> 00:18:04,815
at Christmas time, just a long, big,
stretched-out sofa.

444
00:18:04,840 --> 00:18:07,095
Will all be with you for Christmas?
Fingers crossed.

445
00:18:07,120 --> 00:18:11,095
Jack's super busy, Oscar's getting
excited for Father Christmas.

446
00:18:11,120 --> 00:18:12,935
We can play tricks on him now,
where we can get

447
00:18:12,960 --> 00:18:15,895
these phone messages,
literally from Father Christmas,

448
00:18:15,920 --> 00:18:18,655
to get him to bed early,
otherwise, "You're in trouble."

449
00:18:18,680 --> 00:18:20,415
What? ls there an app
that pretends...?

450
00:18:20,440 --> 00:18:22,055
It's exactly that.

451
00:18:22,080 --> 00:18:24,695
Oh, that's nice.
Get to fucking sleep.

452
00:18:24,720 --> 00:18:27,255
That sounds
just like Father Christmas!

453
00:18:27,280 --> 00:18:28,895
LAUGHTER

454
00:18:28,920 --> 00:18:31,775
Zuu, do you celebrate Christmas?
Yeah. I know, obviously, Muslim,

455
00:18:31,800 --> 00:18:33,975
with the beard,
you're probably surprised.

456
00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:35,415
Yeah.
But I do.

457
00:18:35,440 --> 00:18:37,615
Christmas day for you,
what do you do?

458
00:18:37,640 --> 00:18:39,615
What will you be doing this year?

459
00:18:39,640 --> 00:18:42,335
Um, well, I'll probably be
in Africa this year.

460
00:18:42,360 --> 00:18:44,855
Wow!
I'll be giving a lot of people rice.

461
00:18:44,880 --> 00:18:47,335
I don't know why they like rice.

462
00:18:47,360 --> 00:18:49,655
Basmati rice.
You can't get basmati rice

463
00:18:49,680 --> 00:18:51,135
like that in Sierra Leone.

464
00:18:51,160 --> 00:18:54,855
So, when I get there,
I'm, like, the Santa Claus of rice.

465
00:18:54,880 --> 00:18:57,215
Yeah, so, you take a lot
back with you?

466
00:18:57,240 --> 00:19:00,855
Yeah, in my baggage allowance,
at least half is for kilos of rice.

467
00:19:00,880 --> 00:19:01,895
WOW!
Wow!

468
00:19:01,920 --> 00:19:05,255
It sounds very random, but if
you're African, you'll understand.

469
00:19:05,280 --> 00:19:07,415
So, basmati rice in particular,
is sought-after?

470
00:19:07,440 --> 00:19:09,575
Listen, over there, it's like gold.

471
00:19:09,600 --> 00:19:10,615
WOW!

472
00:19:10,640 --> 00:19:12,815
Ancl cos the stew is so important,

473
00:19:12,840 --> 00:19:14,655
having good rice with it...

474
00:19:14,680 --> 00:19:16,855
Cos a lot of them,
they have, like, Chinese rice.

475
00:19:16,880 --> 00:19:18,575
It's not very good rice.
Yeah.

476
00:19:18,600 --> 00:19:19,975
But that basmati...

477
00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:22,175
They know English boy is coming,
yeah.

478
00:19:22,200 --> 00:19:24,735
"Hey, tell that boy, bring rice."

479
00:19:24,760 --> 00:19:27,055
LAUGHTER
"Don't want clothes,

480
00:19:27,080 --> 00:19:30,215
"I don't want money, just bas...
Tilda."

481
00:19:30,240 --> 00:19:31,975
LAUGHTER

482
00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:33,615
Love Tilda. Two minutes.

483
00:19:33,640 --> 00:19:35,255
Two minutes.
Two minutes.

484
00:19:35,280 --> 00:19:36,815
A very different Christmas

485
00:19:36,840 --> 00:19:38,655
to Gordon's will be, no doubt.

486
00:19:38,680 --> 00:19:41,055
Do you get out the Tilda rice
at Christmas, Gordon?

487
00:19:41,080 --> 00:19:44,135
Course not. I love rice,
but traditionally, yeah,

488
00:19:44,160 --> 00:19:46,735
we stick to a very classic beef
or roast turkey.

489
00:19:46,760 --> 00:19:50,095
And I don't like eating
three times a day on Christmas Day,

490
00:19:50,120 --> 00:19:52,335
so we don't start brunch
till, like, 10.30, 11.

491
00:19:52,360 --> 00:19:53,735
So, you don't have breakfast,

492
00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:55,535
lunch, dinner?
Exactly.

493
00:19:55,560 --> 00:19:57,735
Just late breakfast, 11.30, 12.
Yeah.

494
00:19:57,760 --> 00:19:59,935
And then Christmas lunch
around 5.30, 6.00.

495
00:19:59,960 --> 00:20:01,655
That way, you eat twice.

496
00:20:01,680 --> 00:20:04,655
The pressure to get everything
ready for two o'clock is insane.

497
00:20:04,680 --> 00:20:07,135
I bet you add a flourish.
You're Gordon Ramsay. There must be

498
00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:08,895
something special
about your Christmas.

499
00:20:08,920 --> 00:20:11,095
My turkey.
And what you do with your turkey

500
00:20:11,120 --> 00:20:13,535
that makes it special?
I baste it.

501
00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:15,695
Do you brine it?
I do brine it, yes.

502
00:20:15,720 --> 00:20:16,855
In a bin bag?

503
00:20:16,880 --> 00:20:19,255
No, no, no. In a huge tub.
ZUU: Why in a bin bag?

504
00:20:19,280 --> 00:20:20,735
That's the only way
I could fit it in.

505
00:20:20,760 --> 00:20:22,935
I didn't have a pot big enough.
I always use a bin bag.

506
00:20:22,960 --> 00:20:25,575
We've got these big plastic tubs
that, when you come off the beach,

507
00:20:25,600 --> 00:20:28,255
you step inside and you fill it
with water, and we brine it in that.

508
00:20:28,280 --> 00:20:30,655
I never thought of that.
24 hours in there.

509
00:20:30,680 --> 00:20:32,535
And then, we line it
with this truffle butter.

510
00:20:32,560 --> 00:20:34,975
Ooh! And we take it out,
turn it upside down.

511
00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:36,895
We've gone up a notch.
ZUU: Right there.

512
00:20:36,920 --> 00:20:38,575
Do you inject it?
No.

513
00:20:38,600 --> 00:20:40,055
No, no, no.

514
00:20:40,080 --> 00:20:42,535
You get under the skin, rub it in.
Definitely under the skin.

515
00:20:42,560 --> 00:20:44,535
The secret of a great turkey is
in the resting.

516
00:20:44,560 --> 00:20:45,735
You've got to let it rest

517
00:20:45,760 --> 00:20:47,735
for at least two hours
before you start serving.

518
00:20:47,760 --> 00:20:49,895
After you've cooked it?
Yeah, but properly rest it.

519
00:20:49,920 --> 00:20:51,015
Wait, how long?

520
00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:52,735
Two hours.
Christ! Really?

521
00:20:52,760 --> 00:20:54,935
And turning the bird over
every half an hour.

522
00:20:54,960 --> 00:20:56,575
Whoa!
Two hours?!

523
00:20:56,600 --> 00:20:58,615
I knew that cos I'm a chef,
you know what I'm saying?

524
00:20:58,640 --> 00:21:01,775
Obviously, you have to rest it for
kind of as long as you cooked it,

525
00:21:01,800 --> 00:21:03,815
cos all the moisture
comes out of the bones.

526
00:21:03,840 --> 00:21:05,815
Yeah.
You know what I'm saying.

527
00:21:05,840 --> 00:21:07,535
Don't doubt my ting!

528
00:21:07,560 --> 00:21:09,335
Yeah?
Thank you.

529
00:21:09,360 --> 00:21:11,535
Yes.
Thank you.

530
00:21:11,560 --> 00:21:13,015
Yeah, but I know...

531
00:21:13,040 --> 00:21:15,735
But who actually does that?
What, rest it?

532
00:21:15,760 --> 00:21:17,135
Yeah.
These two!

533
00:21:17,160 --> 00:21:20,215
But why would you cook it and then
sit and look at it for two hours?

534
00:21:20,240 --> 00:21:22,495
You don't even want your turkey
to be hot.

535
00:21:22,520 --> 00:21:23,775
You want it to be lukewarm

536
00:21:23,800 --> 00:21:25,495
and use all the sides to heat it up.

537
00:21:25,520 --> 00:21:26,935
There's no fat in a turkey.

538
00:21:26,960 --> 00:21:28,935
But there's a time in your life
when you think,

539
00:21:28,960 --> 00:21:31,335
"You know what? Life's too short."
No! Shit, no!

540
00:21:31,360 --> 00:21:35,735
My life is too short to sit
and look at a cooked turkey...

541
00:21:35,760 --> 00:21:36,855
LAUGHTER

542
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:39,495
...on Christmas Day when I'm hungry.
You can do what Michael does

543
00:21:39,520 --> 00:21:42,535
and pick a little wing
and just nibble it off in the back.

544
00:21:42,560 --> 00:21:44,935
LAUGHTER

545
00:21:44,960 --> 00:21:49,215
You start and just take the wing
and disappear in the back.

546
00:21:49,240 --> 00:21:51,375
Yeah, I grab a little bit
on the way by.

547
00:21:51,400 --> 00:21:54,095
I'm very good at eat-bys.

548
00:21:54,120 --> 00:21:56,535
There's things I can't pass.
I was actually thinking

549
00:21:56,560 --> 00:21:59,175
the other clay that my wife,
for 20 years,

550
00:21:59,200 --> 00:22:01,375
she leaves a little bit of crust

551
00:22:01,400 --> 00:22:03,295
every morning from her toast,
which I eat.

552
00:22:03,320 --> 00:22:05,095
It's the first thing I eat
in the clay,

553
00:22:05,120 --> 00:22:07,095
and I don't even think
before I eat it.

554
00:22:07,120 --> 00:22:08,575
On the way to say good morning,

555
00:22:08,600 --> 00:22:10,735
I pick it up and it's in.

556
00:22:10,760 --> 00:22:12,135
20 years of that.

557
00:22:12,160 --> 00:22:13,815
That should be on her.

558
00:22:13,840 --> 00:22:15,215
She is very slim.

559
00:22:15,240 --> 00:22:18,335
I'm carrying around 20 years...
This is her crust here.

560
00:22:18,360 --> 00:22:20,055
LAUGHTER

561
00:22:20,080 --> 00:22:22,695
I'm walking around
with her crust on me.

562
00:22:22,720 --> 00:22:24,855
This was not intended.

563
00:22:24,880 --> 00:22:26,455
She toasted that for her.

564
00:22:26,480 --> 00:22:28,455
Why am I walking around with it?

565
00:22:28,480 --> 00:22:30,895
Michael, that isn't just crust.
LAUGHTER

566
00:22:30,920 --> 00:22:33,175
You can tell yourself that
if you want.

567
00:22:33,200 --> 00:22:35,175
There's a few roast potatoes
she leaves.

568
00:22:35,200 --> 00:22:36,855
But I do struggle with waste,

569
00:22:36,880 --> 00:22:39,015
which goes straight onto my waist.

570
00:22:39,040 --> 00:22:40,455
Here's the thing, though.

571
00:22:40,480 --> 00:22:43,575
Despite his advanced years,
Gordon Ramsay is fit as a fiddle.

572
00:22:43,600 --> 00:22:45,095
He is.
You're still

573
00:22:45,120 --> 00:22:46,495
in the gym all the time.
Amazing.

574
00:22:46,520 --> 00:22:47,975
Every other day, four times a week.

575
00:22:48,000 --> 00:22:49,535
Swimming, cycling.
Yeah, swimming.

576
00:22:49,560 --> 00:22:51,735
We swim a lot in Cornwall,
we surf a lot in Cornwall.

577
00:22:51,760 --> 00:22:54,295
But you won't do something like that
on Christmas Day, would you?

578
00:22:54,320 --> 00:22:55,655
Oh, Christmas morning.

579
00:22:55,680 --> 00:22:56,975
You go out for a swim?

580
00:22:57,000 --> 00:22:58,655
There's a gathering down in Rock

581
00:22:58,680 --> 00:23:00,615
and everyone jumps in, literally...

582
00:23:00,640 --> 00:23:02,295
In the cold sea?

583
00:23:02,320 --> 00:23:03,895
In the cold sea.

584
00:23:03,920 --> 00:23:06,055
Some of them even have
little Speedos on,

585
00:23:06,080 --> 00:23:07,735
or a wetsuit, whatever you wish.

586
00:23:07,760 --> 00:23:09,975
But, yeah, in... out.

587
00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:12,535
Why are you doing that
like it's a recipe? In, out.

588
00:23:12,560 --> 00:23:14,535
We know how to swim.

589
00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:18,895
There's something quite unique about
swimming in freezing cold water.

590
00:23:18,920 --> 00:23:20,135
But do the whole family do it?

591
00:23:20,160 --> 00:23:21,975
Yeah.
You force your children to do it?

592
00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:23,135
I don't force them.

593
00:23:23,160 --> 00:23:24,575
They wanna do it. jack starts off.

594
00:23:24,600 --> 00:23:26,455
Once jack's in,
we've all got to follow suit.

595
00:23:26,480 --> 00:23:28,775
Otherwise, you get a hard time
across the dinner table.

596
00:23:28,800 --> 00:23:30,415
Zuu, do you like going outside
for a swim?

597
00:23:30,440 --> 00:23:33,975
No. You know when you're fat,
it's not really a thing that you do.

598
00:23:34,000 --> 00:23:36,175
What, swim?
I'm thinking

599
00:23:36,200 --> 00:23:38,495
about the fat community.
We've always got an excuse

600
00:23:38,520 --> 00:23:40,255
for why we can't swim.
I ain't got Speedos.

601
00:23:40,280 --> 00:23:42,775
Ow, my foot hurts.
LAUGHTER

602
00:23:42,800 --> 00:23:44,215
You know what I mean?

603
00:23:44,240 --> 00:23:46,975
I have learned how to swim, though,
just not very well.

604
00:23:47,000 --> 00:23:48,295
The freezing cold thing...

605
00:23:48,320 --> 00:23:50,575
In the morning of Christmas?
Are you mad?

606
00:23:50,600 --> 00:23:52,815
I need to have my smoked salmon
with some cream cheese

607
00:23:52,840 --> 00:23:55,495
and a bagel.
How many restaurants have you got

608
00:23:55,520 --> 00:23:56,775
now, Gordon?

609
00:23:56,800 --> 00:23:58,335
Er... 44.
44?

610
00:23:58,360 --> 00:24:00,895
Can I ask you a question?
Yes. Please.

611
00:24:00,920 --> 00:24:02,695
It's the way you say it,
I'm confused about.

612
00:24:02,720 --> 00:24:05,255
Cos you don't really say,
"Restaurant." You go, "Restrant."

613
00:24:05,280 --> 00:24:07,215
I just speak very quickly.

614
00:24:07,240 --> 00:24:08,495
Restrant.

615
00:24:08,520 --> 00:24:11,455
I would have thought
that was a word you'd got down,

616
00:24:11,480 --> 00:24:13,095
<i>“ restaurant“ .
Rest: ant.</i>

617
00:24:13,120 --> 00:24:14,335
Restrant.

618
00:24:14,360 --> 00:24:15,455
Restrant.

619
00:24:15,480 --> 00:24:17,055
MINNIE: Restrant.
Every time...

620
00:24:17,080 --> 00:24:19,455
We love your shows, the whole
family, we always watch you,

621
00:24:19,480 --> 00:24:22,135
but we spend the whole time going,
"Restrant. Restrant."

622
00:24:22,160 --> 00:24:24,335
LAUGHTER
Is it because you talk too fast,

623
00:24:24,360 --> 00:24:26,735
your brain is operating too fast
for you to say "restaurant"?

624
00:24:26,760 --> 00:24:28,175
I think you're right.
But also

625
00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:29,855
cos you speak French and Italian?

626
00:24:29,880 --> 00:24:33,855
No, Gino's taught me a little bit of
Italian, but bilingual with French.

627
00:24:33,880 --> 00:24:37,095
Maybe it's the French, "restaurant".
FRENCH ACCENT: Restaurant.

628
00:24:37,120 --> 00:24:38,775
Restaurant.
Tres bien. Oui.

629
00:24:38,800 --> 00:24:42,295
Can we just go back to the fact
that you have 45 restaurants?

630
00:24:42,320 --> 00:24:45,495
That's around the globe, yes.
Wow!

631
00:24:45,520 --> 00:24:48,455
And how many are good?
LAUGHTER

632
00:24:49,560 --> 00:24:51,295
Let's talk about your TV career

633
00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:53,255
cos I love watching you on TV.
Gordon Ramsay has

634
00:24:53,280 --> 00:24:55,615
a brand-new show,
I'm excited to say.

635
00:24:55,640 --> 00:24:59,255
It is called Next Level Chef.

636
00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:01,295
Yeah. This has already been out
in America,

637
00:25:01,320 --> 00:25:03,935
but you're doing one over here now.
Yeah, just finished with ITV.

638
00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:06,295
Tell us the idea.
It's quite a high concept.

639
00:25:06,320 --> 00:25:08,015
Yeah, it's launching next month.

640
00:25:08,040 --> 00:25:10,615
It's three amazing kitchens
stacked on top of one another -

641
00:25:10,640 --> 00:25:13,495
basement kitchen, middle kitchen,
and then, this top-flight kitchen

642
00:25:13,520 --> 00:25:15,135
that's incredible.
So, there are

643
00:25:15,160 --> 00:25:16,615
three buildings, or three spaces,

644
00:25:16,640 --> 00:25:18,455
three working rooms
on top of one another.

645
00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:23,095
Yeah, we had the pleasure of
Big Zuu as an honorary guest judge.

646
00:25:23,120 --> 00:25:25,775
And in the middle of these kitchens
is this incredible platform,

647
00:25:25,800 --> 00:25:28,335
and it starts from the top,
works its way down to the basement.

648
00:25:28,360 --> 00:25:32,215
The idea is to grab ingredients and
cook your way up to the top floor.

649
00:25:32,240 --> 00:25:34,735
So, the bottom floor is where
the ingredients come to last,

650
00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:36,655
so you have less to choose from.
That's right.

651
00:25:36,680 --> 00:25:39,015
And the equipment isn't as good,
I guess. That's right,

652
00:25:39,040 --> 00:25:41,055
all sort of broken down
and no electric mixers...

653
00:25:41,080 --> 00:25:43,255
So, almost like a comment
on society,

654
00:25:43,280 --> 00:25:45,135
starting at the bottom
and working your way up.

655
00:25:45,160 --> 00:25:46,375
Where we all were, exactly.

656
00:25:46,400 --> 00:25:48,695
I spent many years
in the basement kitchen.

657
00:25:48,720 --> 00:25:50,455
Ancl do you shout on it?

658
00:25:50,480 --> 00:25:52,015
Do you do shouting?
Of course he does.

659
00:25:52,040 --> 00:25:54,455
He doesn't do anything else.
No, you've got to do shouting.

660
00:25:54,480 --> 00:25:56,375
You've got to do shouting.
Coach, Michael.

661
00:25:56,400 --> 00:25:57,695
Don't get nice Gordon.

662
00:25:57,720 --> 00:26:00,815
I like it when you're screaming
in people's faces.

663
00:26:00,840 --> 00:26:03,055
But unlike any other cooking show,
it's sort of...

664
00:26:03,080 --> 00:26:05,575
It's this platform that descends
across all three kitchens,

665
00:26:05,600 --> 00:26:07,135
and by the time you get
to the basement,

666
00:26:07,160 --> 00:26:08,855
it's depleted and not much left.

667
00:26:08,880 --> 00:26:12,175
It's a sign of a great chef
when you get creative with nothing.

668
00:26:12,200 --> 00:26:14,575
But you need to be aggressive,
Gordon.

669
00:26:14,600 --> 00:26:17,375
You need to kick them
off the top level

670
00:26:17,400 --> 00:26:20,295
into the bottom level and they die.
LAUGHTER

671
00:26:20,320 --> 00:26:23,055
<i>And then, you need to get
thew corpse and go,</i>

672
00:26:23,080 --> 00:26:26,775
"You fucking idiot!
You can't fucking cook!

673
00:26:26,800 --> 00:26:29,975
"You fucking idiot!
We'll be back after the break."

674
00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:31,375
Ancl at the end of the credits,

675
00:26:31,400 --> 00:26:33,735
I want you to pop back and scream
at all the viewers.

676
00:26:33,760 --> 00:26:36,335
"You can fuck off as well!"

677
00:26:36,360 --> 00:26:38,855
LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
"See you next week."

678
00:26:43,560 --> 00:26:46,255
This is coming soon to ITV and ITVX.

679
00:26:46,280 --> 00:26:48,175
You know what you're gonna get
with Gordon.

680
00:26:48,200 --> 00:26:50,095
You own it.
That's what I love about you.

681
00:26:50,120 --> 00:26:51,575
You own the F-word.
Here you go.

682
00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:53,575
This is Next Level Chef.
Look at this.

683
00:26:53,600 --> 00:26:55,175
You'll only have

684
00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:58,975
just 30 seconds to grab the
ingredients you'll be working with.

685
00:26:59,000 --> 00:27:00,895
Here it is, here it is.

686
00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:02,015
Go, go, go, go!

687
00:27:02,040 --> 00:27:03,775
Go! Go!

688
00:27:03,800 --> 00:27:04,935
Keep grabbing!

689
00:27:04,960 --> 00:27:09,415
Grab what you want, but remember,
if you grab it, you have to use it.

690
00:27:09,440 --> 00:27:11,015
Go, go, go!

691
00:27:11,040 --> 00:27:12,455
Grab ingredients.

692
00:27:12,480 --> 00:27:14,775
Grab a protein. Oh, what a grab!

693
00:27:16,240 --> 00:27:18,535
Let's go, guys. OK, let's go.
There's bacon there.

694
00:27:18,560 --> 00:27:19,895
Just grab the bacon.

695
00:27:19,920 --> 00:27:21,215
Put something in there. Sauce.

696
00:27:21,240 --> 00:27:23,215
Seconds to go, seconds to go.

697
00:27:23,240 --> 00:27:26,975
Grab, grab, grab, grab. Yes!

698
00:27:27,000 --> 00:27:31,615
Nyesha, what is this place?
It's a kitchen, Chef.

699
00:27:31,640 --> 00:27:34,015
They have to cook in minutes,

700
00:27:34,040 --> 00:27:36,375
and then, that nail-biting finish
when they have to get

701
00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:38,135
their dishes onto the platform.

702
00:27:38,160 --> 00:27:42,375
Platform is here. Come on, guys.
Get over to the platform.

703
00:27:42,400 --> 00:27:43,615
Teddy, go, go, 90!

704
00:27:43,640 --> 00:27:44,855
Go, go, go!

705
00:27:44,880 --> 00:27:46,095
Get it on there.

706
00:27:46,120 --> 00:27:47,975
Go, go, go, go!

707
00:27:48,000 --> 00:27:50,655
Selwyn! Selwyn!

708
00:27:51,800 --> 00:27:53,255
Jesus Christ!

709
00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:55,095
APPLAUSE

710
00:27:55,120 --> 00:27:57,255
That looks amazing.
MINNIE: Amazing.

711
00:27:57,280 --> 00:27:59,335
That looks amazing.

712
00:27:59,360 --> 00:28:03,135
It's a shame that you couldn't
call it The Hunger Games

713
00:28:03,160 --> 00:28:04,775
cos it does have
an element of that.

714
00:28:04,800 --> 00:28:07,975
You know, getting a format
that's successful is very difficult.

715
00:28:08,000 --> 00:28:10,175
The Wheel, which you've come up
with, is amazing.

716
00:28:10,200 --> 00:28:11,415
Yeah.
What a great show.

717
00:28:11,440 --> 00:28:14,495
And then, you had that show called
Bank Balance that was terrible,

718
00:28:14,520 --> 00:28:16,935
but now you've got this.
LAUGHTER

719
00:28:16,960 --> 00:28:18,935
What was that about?
What was that pile of sh...?

720
00:28:18,960 --> 00:28:22,175
You shouting at people,
"Balance the brick."

721
00:28:22,200 --> 00:28:23,855
And they were going,
"What am I doing?

722
00:28:23,880 --> 00:28:26,615
That was in lockdown!
That was terrible.

723
00:28:26,640 --> 00:28:30,615
Come on, Jesus Christ!
It was shocking, wasn't it?

724
00:28:30,640 --> 00:28:32,135
LAUGHTER

725
00:28:32,160 --> 00:28:33,735
It's coming back.
Oh, you're kidding!

726
00:28:35,320 --> 00:28:36,375
Is it?
Yes!

727
00:28:36,400 --> 00:28:38,735
What?
Yes!

728
00:28:38,760 --> 00:28:41,695
And you are doing another road trip
with Gino and Fred. Yes.

729
00:28:41,720 --> 00:28:43,975
Where are you going to this time?
Urn...

730
00:28:44,000 --> 00:28:45,335
Spain.

731
00:28:45,360 --> 00:28:47,215
Why are you laughing?
What's wrong with Spain?

732
00:28:47,240 --> 00:28:49,415
No, because everyone thinks
it's about Benidorm.

733
00:28:49,440 --> 00:28:52,255
But the beautiful north-west coast,
Galicia...

734
00:28:52,280 --> 00:28:53,895
Do you still do a cheap holiday?

735
00:28:53,920 --> 00:28:55,815
LAUGHTER

736
00:28:57,680 --> 00:28:59,415
We go camping in Cornwall.

737
00:28:59,440 --> 00:29:01,975
You go camping? It's in the back
garden, but we still camp.

738
00:29:02,000 --> 00:29:04,495
Michael, there's
a Wheel Christmas special,

739
00:29:04,520 --> 00:29:06,695
and I believe Gordon's friend
Gino D'Acampo is in it.

740
00:29:06,720 --> 00:29:08,735
How was Gino?
How was his general knowledge?

741
00:29:08,760 --> 00:29:11,375
Er... Well, I can't give away
how he did, but he did very well.

742
00:29:11,400 --> 00:29:13,255
I mean, the game is...

743
00:29:13,280 --> 00:29:14,895
You are assisted,

744
00:29:14,920 --> 00:29:17,295
and he needed assistance.

745
00:29:17,320 --> 00:29:18,695
LAUGHTER

746
00:29:18,720 --> 00:29:20,935
Which is the format, which is good.

747
00:29:20,960 --> 00:29:22,855
Big Zuu's been on The Wheel.

748
00:29:22,880 --> 00:29:25,335
I did good. Don't say it like that.
You did great.

749
00:29:25,360 --> 00:29:26,855
I came second.
You came second.

750
00:29:26,880 --> 00:29:28,615
After the Speaker.
What's my man called?

751
00:29:28,640 --> 00:29:30,095
John something.
Yes.

752
00:29:30,120 --> 00:29:31,975
Bercow.
Bercow.

753
00:29:32,000 --> 00:29:34,255
That guy.
You were amazing.

754
00:29:34,280 --> 00:29:35,975
LAUGHTER

755
00:29:36,000 --> 00:29:39,455
Yeah, he was a contestant
with Alesha Dixon and Bear Grylls.

756
00:29:39,480 --> 00:29:40,615
They played for charity.

757
00:29:40,640 --> 00:29:42,295
Gino was completely hilarious.

758
00:29:42,320 --> 00:29:44,735
He always is.
He was really funny.

759
00:29:44,760 --> 00:29:46,695
We love Gino, don't we?
AUDIENCE: Yes!

760
00:29:46,720 --> 00:29:48,935
Everyone loves Gino D'Acampo.

761
00:29:48,960 --> 00:29:52,295
Here he is on the Christmas special
of The Wheel.

762
00:29:52,320 --> 00:29:54,575
It's on BBC One on Christmas Day.
Have a look at this.

763
00:29:54,600 --> 00:29:57,575
So, Gino, tell me about Christmas
in the D'Acampo household.

764
00:29:57,600 --> 00:29:59,055
What do you tend to do?

765
00:29:59,080 --> 00:30:01,335
We are always on the island
of Sardinia.

766
00:30:01,360 --> 00:30:02,815
Beautiful.
It's beautiful,

767
00:30:02,840 --> 00:30:04,815
all the family together.
Lovely.

768
00:30:04,840 --> 00:30:08,415
We don't eat all the stuff
that, you know,

769
00:30:08,440 --> 00:30:10,215
you guys eat.
You have your own vers|on.

770
00:30:10,240 --> 00:30:13,335
Yeah, no, because I don't like
the idea of having a plate

771
00:30:13,360 --> 00:30:16,175
with everything on it.
I understand.

772
00:30:16,200 --> 00:30:18,055
You know what I mean?
I never understood that,

773
00:30:18,080 --> 00:30:20,015
you guys...
Things falling off it

774
00:30:20,040 --> 00:30:21,375
and rolling off it.

775
00:30:21,400 --> 00:30:23,215
You have turkey and the vegetables

776
00:30:23,240 --> 00:30:24,935
and the potatoes, then the sprouts,

777
00:30:24,960 --> 00:30:28,415
and then you cover everything
with this gravy.

778
00:30:28,440 --> 00:30:29,735
Fantastic!

779
00:30:29,760 --> 00:30:32,295
Yummy, yummy, YUMMY!

780
00:30:32,320 --> 00:30:34,135
What's gravy ever done to you?

781
00:30:34,160 --> 00:30:35,655
Nothing!

782
00:30:35,680 --> 00:30:38,175
But the problem is
everything tastes like gravy.

783
00:30:38,200 --> 00:30:39,895
I don't know what I'm eating.

784
00:30:39,920 --> 00:30:42,495
Sprouts, they taste like gravy.

785
00:30:42,520 --> 00:30:44,815
The turkey tastes like the broccoli.

786
00:30:44,840 --> 00:30:46,175
It's a mess.

787
00:30:46,200 --> 00:30:47,735
It's textured gravy,
that's what it is.

788
00:30:47,760 --> 00:30:49,855
APPLAUSE

789
00:30:51,640 --> 00:30:56,295
Is he actually Italian?
Is he actually Italian?

790
00:30:56,320 --> 00:30:58,335
Yeah, cos, literally,
his accent sounds made up.

791
00:30:58,360 --> 00:31:00,695
It does sound a bit...
Do you think he's Italian?

792
00:31:00,720 --> 00:31:02,895
Do you reckon
he's really from Leeds?

793
00:31:02,920 --> 00:31:04,295
LAUGHTER

794
00:31:04,320 --> 00:31:06,335
I think you're keeping a secret
for him.

795
00:31:06,360 --> 00:31:08,695
We have to take a break.
Don't go away because Adam Lambert

796
00:31:08,720 --> 00:31:11,855
will be joining us in just a moment.
See you in a couple of minutes.

797
00:31:11,880 --> 00:31:14,055
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

798
00:31:23,160 --> 00:31:26,335
Welcome back to the show.
Let's get my next guest out,

799
00:31:26,360 --> 00:31:27,895
ladies and gentlemen.

800
00:31:27,920 --> 00:31:30,855
He's an incredible singer
and just a wonderful performer.

801
00:31:30,880 --> 00:31:32,455
The one and only Adam Lambert.

802
00:31:32,480 --> 00:31:35,055
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

803
00:31:41,160 --> 00:31:43,215
Looking spectacular, as always!

804
00:31:43,240 --> 00:31:45,135
Good to see you.
Wow, you look amazing.

805
00:31:45,160 --> 00:31:46,455
Thank you.
Come and sit down.

806
00:31:46,480 --> 00:31:47,815
H I, everybody.

807
00:31:47,840 --> 00:31:49,695
Adam, how are you?
You're looking great.

808
00:31:49,720 --> 00:31:52,735
You look amazing. Doesn't he look
amazing, ladies and gentlemen?

809
00:31:52,760 --> 00:31:54,615
CHEERING
We were talking about Christmas.

810
00:31:54,640 --> 00:31:56,175
Cos you're Jewish, I believe.

811
00:31:56,200 --> 00:31:57,935
I am, yes.
So, does Hanukkah start...?

812
00:31:57,960 --> 00:32:00,135
Is it tomorrow it starts?
Yeah, I think so, yeah.

813
00:32:00,160 --> 00:32:01,615
L'chaim.
L'chaim.

814
00:32:01,640 --> 00:32:02,895
L'chaim.

815
00:32:02,920 --> 00:32:05,215
My daughter... Well, my wife's
Jewish. Oh, there you go.

816
00:32:05,240 --> 00:32:07,415
So, we do some of the singing
on the Friday night.

817
00:32:07,440 --> 00:32:09,775
Do you do the menorah?
We will be doing the menorah.

818
00:32:09,800 --> 00:32:11,255
I'm not heavily involved in that

819
00:32:11,280 --> 00:32:13,775
cos I'm notjewish and I don't know
if I'm allowed to touch it.

820
00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:15,375
LAUGHTER

821
00:32:15,400 --> 00:32:18,935
There is, like, a prayer
with the menorah

822
00:32:18,960 --> 00:32:21,415
and it's...
I used to like singing it,

823
00:32:21,440 --> 00:32:23,575
because singing, you know,
is the thing I do.

824
00:32:23,600 --> 00:32:24,895
You can do that, yes.

825
00:32:24,920 --> 00:32:27,695
So, I would...
# Baruch atah Adonai

826
00:32:27,720 --> 00:32:30,575
# Eloheinu melech ha-olam

827
00:32:30,600 --> 00:32:34,015
# Asher kid'shanu b'mitzvotav

828
00:32:34,040 --> 00:32:37,415
# V'tsivanu I'hadlik ner

829
00:32:37,440 --> 00:32:40,815
# Ner shel Hanukkah. #

830
00:32:40,840 --> 00:32:44,375
<i>CHEERNG AND APPLAUSE
Maze flow. Maze flow.!</i>

831
00:32:44,400 --> 00:32:46,855
Yeah.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

832
00:32:46,880 --> 00:32:48,735
MINNIE: Beautiful. Beautiful.

833
00:32:48,760 --> 00:32:50,935
What a voice you have.

834
00:32:50,960 --> 00:32:52,855
You really can sing.
Oh, thank you. Thanks.

835
00:32:52,880 --> 00:32:54,455
It's going from strength
to strength.

836
00:32:54,480 --> 00:32:55,775
You've got a new album out now

837
00:32:55,800 --> 00:32:57,175
of cover songs...
Mm-hm.

838
00:32:57,200 --> 00:33:00,095
...which I assume you've chosen
because they mean something to you

839
00:33:00,120 --> 00:33:01,495
or they're songs that you love.

840
00:33:01,520 --> 00:33:04,095
They're just songs I like
that I thought were great songs.

841
00:33:04,120 --> 00:33:07,095
Ancl the goal was
to take songs and...

842
00:33:07,120 --> 00:33:09,295
The name of the album is High Drama.
OK.

843
00:33:09,320 --> 00:33:11,055
So, how do I take these
and kind of make them me?

844
00:33:11,080 --> 00:33:12,415
I'm not known for being subtle.

845
00:33:12,440 --> 00:33:14,135
No.

846
00:33:14,160 --> 00:33:16,015
So, how do I take them
and make them theatrical

847
00:33:16,040 --> 00:33:17,375
or change them dramatically?

848
00:33:17,400 --> 00:33:19,895
And that was the challenge.
So, you've added drama to songs

849
00:33:19,920 --> 00:33:21,415
that were perhaps dramatic already.

850
00:33:21,440 --> 00:33:22,935
It's out in February.

851
00:33:22,960 --> 00:33:25,215
Any favourites on there?
What are the tracks

852
00:33:25,240 --> 00:33:26,775
you really wanted to get going with?

853
00:33:26,800 --> 00:33:29,375
Well, I'm gonna be singing
something for you later. Yeah.

854
00:33:29,400 --> 00:33:31,335
A version of Duran Duran's
'Ordinary World'.

855
00:33:31,360 --> 00:33:33,335
Which is an amazing song.
Beautiful song.

856
00:33:33,360 --> 00:33:37,215
I actually met Simon Le Bon
at the NME Awards last year

857
00:33:37,240 --> 00:33:39,535
and he was so kind
and so down-to-earth backstage.

858
00:33:39,560 --> 00:33:42,135
I just couldn't believe it.
He came up to me and he was, like,

859
00:33:42,160 --> 00:33:44,295
"Hey, nice to meet you, Adam.
I love what you do."

860
00:33:44,320 --> 00:33:45,855
Ancl I'm, like, "You know who I am?"

861
00:33:45,880 --> 00:33:47,215
It's still crazy.

862
00:33:47,240 --> 00:33:48,335
But you know what?

863
00:33:48,360 --> 00:33:50,055
Because your look,
this was very Duran.

864
00:33:50,080 --> 00:33:51,615
Back then,
they were leading the way.

865
00:33:51,640 --> 00:33:53,655
They always looked
immaculately coiffed.

866
00:33:53,680 --> 00:33:55,575
Coiffed.
They always had the full make-up.

867
00:33:55,600 --> 00:33:57,175
Yeah.
The eyes were always popping.

868
00:33:57,200 --> 00:33:59,335
They had the clothes.
They didn't have quite the...

869
00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:00,735
I'm not wearing make-up.

870
00:34:00,760 --> 00:34:02,415
Yeah.
just lip balm.

871
00:34:02,440 --> 00:34:03,895
LAUGHTER

872
00:34:03,920 --> 00:34:06,655
By the way, have you ever been asked
to do Strictly?

873
00:34:06,680 --> 00:34:07,775
I've sung on Strictly.

874
00:34:07,800 --> 00:34:10,015
I know you've sung, but have you
ever been asked to do it?

875
00:34:10,040 --> 00:34:11,455
Don't ask me to ballroom dance.

876
00:34:11,480 --> 00:34:13,455
I think that's a bad idea.
You would be amazing.

877
00:34:13,480 --> 00:34:15,455
Which part, the dancing?
Yeah.

878
00:34:15,480 --> 00:34:16,815
I don't know.
You can't dance?

879
00:34:16,840 --> 00:34:19,855
Well, I can dance, but I don't know
if, like, ballroom is my thing.

880
00:34:19,880 --> 00:34:21,495
You know who would be great
at Strictly?

881
00:34:21,520 --> 00:34:23,415
Who?
Gordon Ramsay.

882
00:34:23,440 --> 00:34:25,095
LAUGHTER

883
00:34:25,120 --> 00:34:26,655
OK.

884
00:34:26,680 --> 00:34:28,095
I would love to dance.

885
00:34:28,120 --> 00:34:29,735
I've got a huge problem.
What's that?

886
00:34:29,760 --> 00:34:31,375
I've got size 15 feet.

887
00:34:31,400 --> 00:34:33,255
They are some big plates of meat.

888
00:34:33,280 --> 00:34:35,615
Look at the size of that.
AUDIENCE MEMBER WOLF WHISTLES

889
00:34:35,640 --> 00:34:38,015
LAUGHTER

890
00:34:38,040 --> 00:34:41,015
Zuu, what about you?
You can dance, can't you?

891
00:34:41,040 --> 00:34:43,295
Yeah, I can do a little dutty wine
and dem ting there.

892
00:34:43,320 --> 00:34:44,655
LAUGHTER

893
00:34:44,680 --> 00:34:47,095
I would do Strictly for the scandal.

894
00:34:47,120 --> 00:34:49,455
Know what I'm saying?
Them dancers are kind of buff.

895
00:34:49,480 --> 00:34:51,295
Yeah.
I could make it work,

896
00:34:51,320 --> 00:34:52,695
have a little Strictly baby.

897
00:34:52,720 --> 00:34:54,495
Yeah. Minnie, have you been asked?

898
00:34:54,520 --> 00:34:56,495
In America, it's called
Dancing With The Stars.

899
00:34:56,520 --> 00:34:58,255
Yeah.
They must have asked you, I'm sure.

900
00:34:58,280 --> 00:35:00,455
Yeah. Yeah, but no.

901
00:35:00,480 --> 00:35:02,055
OK. And why not?
Oh, God, no.

902
00:35:02,080 --> 00:35:03,935
No, no.

903
00:35:03,960 --> 00:35:05,935
No, no, no, a thousand times no.

904
00:35:05,960 --> 00:35:07,655
I love to watch it, but no.

905
00:35:07,680 --> 00:35:09,935
Would it not be a fun experience?

906
00:35:09,960 --> 00:35:12,735
It doesn't look that fun.

907
00:35:12,760 --> 00:35:14,655
It looks absolutely terrifying.

908
00:35:14,680 --> 00:35:16,855
And getting yelled at by...

909
00:35:16,880 --> 00:35:19,055
Who's that guy who yells
at everybody?

910
00:35:19,080 --> 00:35:20,095
Gordon Ramsay.

911
00:35:20,120 --> 00:35:21,935
LAUGHTER

912
00:35:21,960 --> 00:35:23,855
The other one.

913
00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:25,175
Michael.
Hello.

914
00:35:25,200 --> 00:35:26,895
We would love to see you...

915
00:35:26,920 --> 00:35:29,175
I love to see you do some salsa.
Yeah, can't you go on?

916
00:35:29,200 --> 00:35:30,935
I would be amazing.

917
00:35:30,960 --> 00:35:33,095
LAUGHTER

918
00:35:33,120 --> 00:35:35,095
I have hypermobility.

919
00:35:35,120 --> 00:35:36,695
Do you really?

920
00:35:36,720 --> 00:35:39,015
The music releases me.

921
00:35:39,040 --> 00:35:40,695
I wouldn't need the coach.

922
00:35:40,720 --> 00:35:43,575
I wouldn't need the other...
the partner.

923
00:35:43,600 --> 00:35:46,455
I would just...
Solo it. He'd solo it.

924
00:35:46,480 --> 00:35:49,135
Every week, I would just go.
I would just feel the music.

925
00:35:49,160 --> 00:35:50,695
I wouldn't even need any prep.

926
00:35:50,720 --> 00:35:52,455
I'd just...
"Play what you want, let me go."

927
00:35:52,480 --> 00:35:54,135
LAUGHTER

928
00:35:54,160 --> 00:35:55,455
Let's get back to Big Zuu,

929
00:35:55,480 --> 00:35:58,015
because, Zuu, I'm a big fan of you,
you know that,

930
00:35:58,040 --> 00:35:59,855
even though I've got
a bone to pick with you.

931
00:35:59,880 --> 00:36:02,055
You came on this show
about two years ago.

932
00:36:02,080 --> 00:36:03,135
Yeah.
And I said,

933
00:36:03,160 --> 00:36:04,895
"I love Zuu's Big Eats."
Yeah.

934
00:36:04,920 --> 00:36:06,895
"You go round and ask celebrities

935
00:36:06,920 --> 00:36:08,535
"whether you can cook for them..."
Yeah.

936
00:36:08,560 --> 00:36:10,335
...| said, "but you never ask me."

937
00:36:10,360 --> 00:36:11,935
Oh, don't do that.
And you said,

938
00:36:11,960 --> 00:36:13,575
"Yeah, I'll ask you next series."

939
00:36:13,600 --> 00:36:15,255
Two series ago.

940
00:36:15,280 --> 00:36:17,455
Don't do that, don't do that.
Hopefully,

941
00:36:17,480 --> 00:36:19,335
if we do season four,
we can get you on there.

942
00:36:19,360 --> 00:36:20,695
Never mind "hopefully"!

943
00:36:20,720 --> 00:36:23,015
LAUGHTER

944
00:36:23,040 --> 00:36:25,175
No, we can make it work.
Don't do that.

945
00:36:25,200 --> 00:36:26,575
You're making me feel bad.

946
00:36:26,600 --> 00:36:29,175
I'm not the booker, you know what
I'm saying? I'm just the talent.

947
00:36:29,200 --> 00:36:30,895
LAUGHTER

948
00:36:30,920 --> 00:36:33,855
That is just hiding in plain sight.

949
00:36:33,880 --> 00:36:35,375
Anyway, it's a great show.

950
00:36:35,400 --> 00:36:37,455
It's currently on UKTV Play,

951
00:36:37,480 --> 00:36:40,615
and it's coming soon
to BBC Three and iPlayer.

952
00:36:40,640 --> 00:36:41,775
One big change this time.

953
00:36:41,800 --> 00:36:43,615
You've actually changed the van.

954
00:36:43,640 --> 00:36:46,775
Yeah, we've got a new van. We ain't
got the shitty fish and chips van

955
00:36:46,800 --> 00:36:48,775
that we had before
that we used to rent.

956
00:36:48,800 --> 00:36:51,575
We've actually got some budget
from the channel. Look at it there.

957
00:36:51,600 --> 00:36:53,175
So, you bought a trailer.

958
00:36:53,200 --> 00:36:55,655
We bought the full thing.
It's still a bit mad.

959
00:36:55,680 --> 00:36:57,855
That was in Lord's Cricket Ground,

960
00:36:57,880 --> 00:36:59,535
if you can tell from the background.

961
00:36:59,560 --> 00:37:01,335
<i>And Tubsey and Hyder.</i>

962
00:37:01,360 --> 00:37:02,855
Cooking in that van isn't easy.

963
00:37:02,880 --> 00:37:06,055
Sometimes I, like, envy
the studio shows when I see you lot

964
00:37:06,080 --> 00:37:07,975
in the studio in the warmth,
you know.

965
00:37:08,000 --> 00:37:11,455
Just nice, no rain, no wind.

966
00:37:11,480 --> 00:37:13,015
We were filming in Leeds for Mel B.

967
00:37:13,040 --> 00:37:15,335
I don't know if you remember,
the beginning of this year,

968
00:37:15,360 --> 00:37:17,215
it was very windy in the UK.
Yeah.

969
00:37:17,240 --> 00:37:19,895
And under the oil fryer...
AUDIENCE MEMBER SNEEZES

970
00:37:19,920 --> 00:37:22,855
...you have... Bless you.
Under the...

971
00:37:22,880 --> 00:37:24,295
LAUGHTER

972
00:37:24,320 --> 00:37:27,175
Under the oil fryer, obviously...

973
00:37:27,200 --> 00:37:29,335
MICHAEL: We don't say "bless you"
in pandemics.

974
00:37:29,360 --> 00:37:30,495
Fuck you.

975
00:37:30,520 --> 00:37:32,375
LAUGHTER

976
00:37:34,360 --> 00:37:35,735
Oh, God.

977
00:37:35,760 --> 00:37:37,935
APPLAUSE

978
00:37:37,960 --> 00:37:41,135
But, yeah, you've got the flames
that keep the oil hot.

979
00:37:41,160 --> 00:37:42,935
Yeah.
Ancl there's, like, wires connected.

980
00:37:42,960 --> 00:37:44,935
Ancl what happened was,
Hyder opened it

981
00:37:44,960 --> 00:37:47,615
to check what was going on
and the wires were on fire.

982
00:37:47,640 --> 00:37:48,695
Wow.
So, essentially,

983
00:37:48,720 --> 00:37:50,535
if the flame hit the oil,

984
00:37:50,560 --> 00:37:52,055
we would have cited.
Wow.

985
00:37:52,080 --> 00:37:54,015
Ancl it was at that moment,
production said,

986
00:37:54,040 --> 00:37:55,295
"We'll stop filming now."

987
00:37:55,320 --> 00:37:57,495
And this is somehow Mel B's fault?

988
00:37:57,520 --> 00:37:59,855
Yeah, I blame Mel B,
cos Mel B didn't turn up.

989
00:37:59,880 --> 00:38:02,095
We would have just died
for no reason.

990
00:38:02,120 --> 00:38:03,815
At least if Mel was there,

991
00:38:03,840 --> 00:38:05,535
then it would have been
for a good cause.

992
00:38:05,560 --> 00:38:07,535
You know, a Spice Girl,
you know what I'm saying?

993
00:38:07,560 --> 00:38:10,375
So, Big Eats won a BAFTA.

994
00:38:10,400 --> 00:38:12,535
Quite rightly so.
You won two, in fact.

995
00:38:12,560 --> 00:38:13,935
Double, that's what I said.

996
00:38:13,960 --> 00:38:15,895
That's a weird old night, I guess.
How was it,

997
00:38:15,920 --> 00:38:18,255
the experience of going there
and winning those awards?

998
00:38:18,280 --> 00:38:21,255
I definitely didn't expect to win.
When I won the first BAFTA,

999
00:38:21,280 --> 00:38:23,055
you get on stage...

1000
00:38:23,080 --> 00:38:24,335
That was me looking excited.

1001
00:38:24,360 --> 00:38:27,615
You get on stage and there's
an autocue and there's a camera.

1002
00:38:27,640 --> 00:38:29,215
But I wasn't reading the autocue

1003
00:38:29,240 --> 00:38:31,295
cos I was freestyling the speech,

1004
00:38:31,320 --> 00:38:33,935
and then,
I didn't wanna look in the camera,

1005
00:38:33,960 --> 00:38:36,535
so I had to find a focal point
to direct my speech.

1006
00:38:36,560 --> 00:38:38,775
Ancl I saw a shiny head

1007
00:38:38,800 --> 00:38:40,455
and it was Ross Kemp.

1008
00:38:40,480 --> 00:38:43,255
I was doing what I was doing, I was
looking at Ross Kemp, thinking,

1009
00:38:43,280 --> 00:38:46,055
"Yo, that's Ross Kemp.
Oh, my clays, EastEnders."

1010
00:38:46,080 --> 00:38:49,055
Ancl I was thinking about that while
I had to say this amazing speech.

1011
00:38:49,080 --> 00:38:51,255
So, all I did was focus
on Ross Kemp's head,

1012
00:38:51,280 --> 00:38:54,135
said the speech of my life,
and then, yeah, man, two BAFTAs.

1013
00:38:54,160 --> 00:38:55,615
Big up Ross Kemp. Thank you.
Yeah.

1014
00:38:55,640 --> 00:38:57,215
APPLAUSE

1015
00:38:58,680 --> 00:39:00,695
So, it's a strange experience,

1016
00:39:00,720 --> 00:39:03,415
because I know you've won awards,
haven't you?

1017
00:39:03,440 --> 00:39:05,655
And award ceremonies, you go there,
you hope you win,

1018
00:39:05,680 --> 00:39:07,295
but at the same time, I suppose

1019
00:39:07,320 --> 00:39:10,295
you can never really relax and enjoy
the night until you find out.

1020
00:39:10,320 --> 00:39:12,655
Yeah, it always feels out of body,
all those things.

1021
00:39:12,680 --> 00:39:13,895
Even performing on TV,

1022
00:39:13,920 --> 00:39:15,335
out of body.
Yeah.

1023
00:39:15,360 --> 00:39:16,855
It's kind of fun.
Yeah.

1024
00:39:16,880 --> 00:39:18,495
It's a good high.
Yeah.

1025
00:39:18,520 --> 00:39:20,295
But it must be stressful.

1026
00:39:20,320 --> 00:39:22,215
You were nominated for an Oscar,
of course.

1027
00:39:22,240 --> 00:39:24,975
Yeah.
When I found out I got nominated,

1028
00:39:25,000 --> 00:39:27,135
me and my sister started screaming
so loudly

1029
00:39:27,160 --> 00:39:29,335
that my neighbour called the cops

1030
00:39:29,360 --> 00:39:31,535
cos she thought something bad
was really happening.

1031
00:39:31,560 --> 00:39:34,255
The cops came, and cos they're
California, Hollywood cops,

1032
00:39:34,280 --> 00:39:36,215
they're, like...
AMERICAN ACCENT: "Er...

1033
00:39:36,240 --> 00:39:38,055
"so, you know, you're not gonna win.

1034
00:39:38,080 --> 00:39:43,615
"It's the... It's the hot,
the hot woman off LA Confidential

1035
00:39:43,640 --> 00:39:46,535
"and the old woman from Titanic.
They're gonna win."

1036
00:39:46,560 --> 00:39:48,735
And I was, like, "Really?
I'm not even in for a..."

1037
00:39:48,760 --> 00:39:51,335
Anyway, they called it.

1038
00:39:51,360 --> 00:39:53,895
Gordon, have you won an award?

1039
00:39:53,920 --> 00:39:56,775
GORDON LAUGHS

1040
00:40:01,640 --> 00:40:04,135
You're such a knob, honestly.

1041
00:40:04,160 --> 00:40:05,895
I don't know if you have.
I'm just trying

1042
00:40:05,920 --> 00:40:07,535
to include you in the conversation.

1043
00:40:07,560 --> 00:40:09,735
MICHAEL: Here he goes.

1044
00:40:09,760 --> 00:40:11,935
<i>One Emmy and three BAH As.
Wow'.!</i>

1045
00:40:11,960 --> 00:40:14,215
MINNIE: Hey!
Wow!

1046
00:40:14,240 --> 00:40:15,895
APPLAUSE

1047
00:40:15,920 --> 00:40:18,735
Amazing, amazing.

1048
00:40:18,760 --> 00:40:21,135
Michael, you've never acted,
have you, really?

1049
00:40:21,160 --> 00:40:23,975
I've won three Oscars,
two Golden Globes,

1050
00:40:24,000 --> 00:40:26,135
four Emmys,

1051
00:40:26,160 --> 00:40:28,295
I've got four Michelin stars...

1052
00:40:28,320 --> 00:40:30,575
LAUGHTER

1053
00:40:30,600 --> 00:40:32,375
APPLAUSE

1054
00:40:33,720 --> 00:40:38,375
I got my Duke of Edinburgh Award,
Bronze.

1055
00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:40,095
We're gonna take a break
but don't go away

1056
00:40:40,120 --> 00:40:42,295
cos afterwards,
Adam Lambert will be performing

1057
00:40:42,320 --> 00:40:44,095
at the end of the show,
and we'll be playing

1058
00:40:44,120 --> 00:40:45,895
our traditional Christmas game
of Pie Face.

1059
00:40:45,920 --> 00:40:47,255
See you in a couple of minutes.

1060
00:40:47,280 --> 00:40:48,615
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1061
00:40:59,600 --> 00:41:01,975
Welcome back to the show.
Everyone's still here.

1062
00:41:02,000 --> 00:41:04,175
Adam, you look spectacular,
of course.

1063
00:41:04,200 --> 00:41:06,015
Thank you.
The shoes,

1064
00:41:06,040 --> 00:41:07,855
that's like a platform boot.
Yeah.

1065
00:41:07,880 --> 00:41:10,815
I've got these
in seven or eight colours.

1066
00:41:10,840 --> 00:41:12,535
I'm obsessed.
Wow.

1067
00:41:12,560 --> 00:41:14,735
Because, you know,
men's heels are not easy to find,

1068
00:41:14,760 --> 00:41:16,695
until recently,
it's become more of a trend.

1069
00:41:16,720 --> 00:41:18,175
But they're very hard to walk in.

1070
00:41:18,200 --> 00:41:21,055
You know, these are pretty flat.
They're not that hard.

1071
00:41:21,080 --> 00:41:23,335
They're pretty comfortable.
The incline is only...

1072
00:41:23,360 --> 00:41:25,935
Look at me. I'm, like...
It's only about that much of a...

1073
00:41:25,960 --> 00:41:27,855
Yeah, cos that's where the foot is.

1074
00:41:27,880 --> 00:41:29,255
Yeah, that's where the foot is.

1075
00:41:29,280 --> 00:41:31,855
How do you get your foot up
like that? You're super bendy.

1076
00:41:31,880 --> 00:41:33,735
LAUGHTER

1077
00:41:33,760 --> 00:41:36,215
I would have pulled something.
You learn a lot in LA, you know.

1078
00:41:36,240 --> 00:41:37,815
LAUGHTER

1079
00:41:37,840 --> 00:41:40,535
You know what they say, Zuu.
Practice makes perfect.

1080
00:41:40,560 --> 00:41:41,935
Right, but...

1081
00:41:41,960 --> 00:41:44,535
Ah! Fucking hell!

1082
00:41:44,560 --> 00:41:46,775
LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

1083
00:41:48,440 --> 00:41:49,735
I can't even get past my knee.

1084
00:41:49,760 --> 00:41:51,495
I'm telling you.

1085
00:41:51,520 --> 00:41:52,975
Every year, on Christmas,

1086
00:41:53,000 --> 00:41:55,455
we do something which has become
quite special to us.

1087
00:41:55,480 --> 00:41:57,175
We play a game called Pie Face.

1088
00:41:57,200 --> 00:41:59,015
So, to put you in the mood,
this will show you

1089
00:41:59,040 --> 00:42:00,255
Pie Faces of years gone by.

1090
00:42:00,280 --> 00:42:02,495
This is like the ghost of Pie Face.
Have a look at this.

1091
00:42:02,520 --> 00:42:06,295
An exciting,
fun-filled game of suspense.

1092
00:42:08,040 --> 00:42:09,695
Wait for the tension to build.

1093
00:42:25,040 --> 00:42:27,295
Warning. Choking hazard.

1094
00:42:28,720 --> 00:42:31,015
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1095
00:42:31,040 --> 00:42:35,015
Everyone has been kind enough to
join me here in the Pie Face arena.

1096
00:42:35,040 --> 00:42:37,975
You know how to play?
Do you know the rules, guys?

1097
00:42:38,000 --> 00:42:39,935
Rules are very simple.
We do one at a time.

1098
00:42:39,960 --> 00:42:41,695
You turn it, click it once.

1099
00:42:41,720 --> 00:42:44,895
At random, some of these will shoot
into our face and give us

1100
00:42:44,920 --> 00:42:46,295
a lovely creamy complexion.

1101
00:42:46,320 --> 00:42:48,895
The last person to get creamed -
they don't have to go all the way -

1102
00:42:48,920 --> 00:42:51,495
the last person who hasn't been
creamed, they're the winner.

1103
00:42:51,520 --> 00:42:53,215
Let's start with Michael.
Glasses off.

1104
00:42:53,240 --> 00:42:54,735
I've taken the glasses off.

1105
00:42:54,760 --> 00:42:56,535
So, everyone, squat,
and faces through.

1106
00:42:56,560 --> 00:42:59,495
I'm sure you've all been asked
to do that before.

1107
00:42:59,520 --> 00:43:02,215
I can't get my head in there.

1108
00:43:02,240 --> 00:43:03,695
Michael, when you're ready.

1109
00:43:03,720 --> 00:43:06,655
I turn it clockwise?
Away from you.

1110
00:43:06,680 --> 00:43:08,335
All right.
GORDON: Shit.

1111
00:43:08,360 --> 00:43:09,975
CLICK
Ooh!

1112
00:43:10,000 --> 00:43:12,255
BIG ZUU: Ooh, ooh!
Minnie, your go.

1113
00:43:13,560 --> 00:43:15,255
CLICK

1114
00:43:15,280 --> 00:43:16,935
My go.

1115
00:43:16,960 --> 00:43:18,295
Oh!

1116
00:43:18,400 --> 00:43:20,935
CHEERING

1117
00:43:24,440 --> 00:43:26,815
Pie face.

1118
00:43:26,840 --> 00:43:29,055
AUDIENCE CHANT: Pie face! Pie face!

1119
00:43:29,080 --> 00:43:32,975
Pie face! Pie face!

1120
00:43:34,000 --> 00:43:35,815
CHEERING

1121
00:43:38,040 --> 00:43:40,175
AUDIENCE CHANT: Pie face!

1122
00:43:40,200 --> 00:43:42,855
Pie face! Pie face!

1123
00:43:42,880 --> 00:43:44,455
Zuu, you're up.
Go on, Zuu!

1124
00:43:44,480 --> 00:43:45,535
Go on, big man ting.

1125
00:43:45,560 --> 00:43:46,775
I don't want cream on my face,

1126
00:43:46,800 --> 00:43:48,655
you know what I'm saying?
I'm a serious rapper.

1127
00:43:48,680 --> 00:43:50,455
CLICK

1128
00:43:50,480 --> 00:43:52,135
CHEERING
Adam.

1129
00:43:54,440 --> 00:43:56,015
I've clone this before.

1130
00:43:56,040 --> 00:43:57,695
LAUGHTER

1131
00:43:57,720 --> 00:43:59,215
CLICK

1132
00:43:59,240 --> 00:44:01,855
OK. Round two, Michael,
when you're ready.

1133
00:44:01,880 --> 00:44:03,055
It's very exciting.

1134
00:44:06,280 --> 00:44:08,415
Argh...
CLICK

1135
00:44:09,840 --> 00:44:11,695
Minnie is dreading this.
Come on, Minnie.

1136
00:44:11,720 --> 00:44:13,255
GORDON: Get in there.
Fucking hell.

1137
00:44:13,280 --> 00:44:14,295
Get in there.

1138
00:44:15,600 --> 00:44:18,135
LAUGHTER
ZUU: Oh, my clays!

1139
00:44:19,640 --> 00:44:22,415
AUDIENCE CHANT: Pie face! Pie face!

1140
00:44:22,440 --> 00:44:25,215
You've got a towel. OK, Zuu.

1141
00:44:26,400 --> 00:44:28,415
CLICK

1142
00:44:28,440 --> 00:44:30,295
I started moving, and that.

1143
00:44:31,320 --> 00:44:33,255
CLICK

1144
00:44:33,280 --> 00:44:36,335
It's definitely you.
I think it's me.

1145
00:44:36,360 --> 00:44:38,535
It has to be. It's the law of...
I think this is it.

1146
00:44:38,560 --> 00:44:41,095
I think this is it.
I'm actually ready for it.

1147
00:44:42,320 --> 00:44:44,015
CLICK
Ah!

1148
00:44:45,680 --> 00:44:47,335
Here we go.

1149
00:44:49,400 --> 00:44:50,975
CLICK

1150
00:44:51,000 --> 00:44:53,575
It's gonna be me.
I was so worried.

1151
00:44:53,600 --> 00:44:55,495
It's gonna be me.

1152
00:44:55,520 --> 00:44:57,055
CLICK

1153
00:44:57,080 --> 00:44:58,415
Back to you.

1154
00:44:58,440 --> 00:45:00,375
Michael.
How long is this gonna last?

1155
00:45:00,400 --> 00:45:02,775
MINNIE: Forever.
Happy New Year, by the way!

1156
00:45:02,800 --> 00:45:04,575
LAUGHTER

1157
00:45:04,600 --> 00:45:06,175
CLICK

1158
00:45:09,120 --> 00:45:10,135
CLICK

1159
00:45:10,160 --> 00:45:11,415
What's happening?

1160
00:45:11,440 --> 00:45:14,135
Now I tasted it, now I want it.

1161
00:45:14,160 --> 00:45:15,775
CLICK

1162
00:45:15,800 --> 00:45:18,095
ZUU: All right,
let's all do it at the same time.

1163
00:45:18,120 --> 00:45:19,415
OK.
Three, two, one.

1164
00:45:20,680 --> 00:45:23,775
LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

1165
00:45:25,560 --> 00:45:27,375
We have a winner.

1166
00:45:27,400 --> 00:45:29,935
AUDIENCE CHANT: Pie face! Pie face!

1167
00:45:29,960 --> 00:45:35,695
Pie Face champion <i>2022,</i>
Adam Lambert, ladies and gentlemen.

1168
00:45:35,720 --> 00:45:37,415
CHEERING

1169
00:45:37,440 --> 00:45:39,415
And that couldn't be
more appropriate

1170
00:45:39,440 --> 00:45:42,055
because, Adam, it means I can ask
you to head over to perform,

1171
00:45:42,080 --> 00:45:45,535
if you'd like to go and get ready.
Adam Lambert, ladies and gentlemen.

1172
00:45:45,560 --> 00:45:47,255
Thank you.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1173
00:45:47,280 --> 00:45:48,815
If you wanna head over.

1174
00:45:48,840 --> 00:45:51,015
And while Adam gets ready to sing,

1175
00:45:51,040 --> 00:45:53,975
I'm gonna say thank you
to all my guests tonight.

1176
00:45:54,000 --> 00:45:56,215
Join me again on New Year's Eve
for a comedy special.

1177
00:45:56,240 --> 00:45:58,655
All that's left for me to do is
wish you a very happy Christmas

1178
00:45:58,680 --> 00:46:00,215
and leave you with some great music.

1179
00:46:00,240 --> 00:46:02,055
With 'Ordinary World',
it's Adam Lambert.

1180
00:46:02,080 --> 00:46:03,935
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1181
00:46:05,400 --> 00:46:07,775
MUSIC: Intro to 'Ordinary World'

1182
00:46:19,080 --> 00:46:22,455
# Came in from a rainy Thursday

1183
00:46:22,480 --> 00:46:25,455
# On the avenue

1184
00:46:25,480 --> 00:46:30,655
# Thought I heard you talking softly

1185
00:46:32,200 --> 00:46:35,775
# I turned on the lights, the TV

1186
00:46:35,800 --> 00:46:38,575
# Ancl the radio

1187
00:46:38,600 --> 00:46:45,455
# Still I can't escape
The ghost of you

1188
00:46:45,480 --> 00:46:48,775
# What has happened to it all?

1189
00:46:48,800 --> 00:46:52,215
# Crazy, some will say

1190
00:46:52,240 --> 00:46:57,895
# Where is the life
That I recognise?

1191
00:46:57,920 --> 00:46:59,775
# Gone away

1192
00:46:59,800 --> 00:47:03,375
# But I won't cry for yesterday

1193
00:47:03,400 --> 00:47:06,615
# There's an ordinary world

1194
00:47:06,640 --> 00:47:12,375
# Somehow I have to find

1195
00:47:12,400 --> 00:47:16,735
# Ancl as I try to make my way

1196
00:47:16,760 --> 00:47:19,855
# To the ordinary world

1197
00:47:19,880 --> 00:47:27,880
# I will learn to survive

1198
00:47:32,640 --> 00:47:35,695
# Passion or coincidence

1199
00:47:35,720 --> 00:47:38,655
# Once prompted you to say

1200
00:47:38,680 --> 00:47:44,095
# Pride will tear us both apart

1201
00:47:44,120 --> 00:47:45,735
#Oh

1202
00:47:45,760 --> 00:47:48,295
# Pride's gone out the window

1203
00:47:48,320 --> 00:47:52,255
# Cross the rooftops, run away

1204
00:47:52,280 --> 00:47:58,695
# Left me in the vacuum of my heart

1205
00:47:58,720 --> 00:48:02,015
# What has happened to me?

1206
00:48:02,040 --> 00:48:05,455
# Crazy, some will say

1207
00:48:05,480 --> 00:48:10,375
# Where is my friend
When I need you most?

1208
00:48:11,720 --> 00:48:13,375
# Gone away

1209
00:48:13,400 --> 00:48:16,775
# But I won't cry for yesterday

1210
00:48:16,800 --> 00:48:19,975
# There's an ordinary world

1211
00:48:20,000 --> 00:48:26,015
# Somehow I have to find

1212
00:48:26,040 --> 00:48:30,015
# Ancl as I try to make my way

1213
00:48:30,040 --> 00:48:33,095
# To the ordinary world

1214
00:48:33,120 --> 00:48:38,855
# I will learn to survive

1215
00:48:38,880 --> 00:48:41,655
# La, la, la

1216
00:48:41,680 --> 00:48:45,615
# Oh, la, la, la, la, la

1217
00:48:45,640 --> 00:48:48,135
# La, la, la

1218
00:48:51,320 --> 00:48:53,895
# Ooh, la, la, la, la

1219
00:48:53,920 --> 00:48:55,775
# La, la, la, la

1220
00:48:55,800 --> 00:48:58,455
#Ah

1221
00:48:58,480 --> 00:49:00,455
# La, la, la

1222
00:49:09,240 --> 00:49:12,375
# Ooh-ooh

1223
00:49:12,400 --> 00:49:15,975
. #

1224
00:49:21,520 --> 00:49:24,415
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1225
00:49:27,480 --> 00:49:29,655
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