1
00:00:03,400 --> 00:00:05,800
- Hey, it's 4:00 p.M.
On Sunday again.
2
00:00:05,830 --> 00:00:08,040
And it's time to show us
your songs, toronto.
3
00:00:08,070 --> 00:00:11,040
[upbeat music]
4
00:00:11,070 --> 00:00:13,940
♪
5
00:00:13,980 --> 00:00:15,180
- You know him as mikey
from "wheels ontario."
6
00:00:15,210 --> 00:00:18,380
It's bryan la croix.
- Pardon.
7
00:00:18,410 --> 00:00:20,110
- French-canadian contortionist
julie francois.
8
00:00:20,150 --> 00:00:21,450
- Bonjour.
9
00:00:21,480 --> 00:00:22,980
- And from two generations
of "wheels ontario,"
10
00:00:23,020 --> 00:00:23,980
It's gene creemers.
11
00:00:24,020 --> 00:00:26,220
- Show us your songs,
toronto.
12
00:00:26,250 --> 00:00:28,160
Ladies and gentlemen,
the tension is palpable
13
00:00:28,190 --> 00:00:30,390
Here at the "show us your songs,
toronto" finals.
14
00:00:30,430 --> 00:00:32,630
Bryan, how are you feeling
about the competition today?
15
00:00:32,660 --> 00:00:34,800
- Gene, so excited
to be here.
16
00:00:34,830 --> 00:00:36,300
All the "bryantologists"
out there,
17
00:00:36,330 --> 00:00:37,460
Shout-out to all of you.
18
00:00:37,500 --> 00:00:39,170
I love all my fans.
19
00:00:39,200 --> 00:00:40,200
Gene, what have you
been up to?
20
00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:41,600
- Oh, just doing the tv show
21
00:00:41,640 --> 00:00:43,200
I've been doing
for the last 25 years.
22
00:00:43,240 --> 00:00:44,570
It's called "wheels ontario."
23
00:00:44,610 --> 00:00:45,770
Have you heard of it there,
bryan?
24
00:00:45,810 --> 00:00:49,880
- Yeah, I play mikey
on "wheels ontario."
25
00:00:49,910 --> 00:00:52,650
I'm just excited that
it was a platform for me
26
00:00:52,680 --> 00:00:55,480
To get a little further along
in my music career.
27
00:00:55,520 --> 00:00:57,680
And hopefully I won't
be on there much longer.
28
00:00:57,720 --> 00:00:58,820
- Oh, do you have
a music career?
29
00:00:58,850 --> 00:01:00,650
- Yeah, I've got
a new single coming out
30
00:01:00,690 --> 00:01:03,220
Called "enter to win,"
and, um--
31
00:01:03,260 --> 00:01:04,890
- Okay, and all these
contestants today
32
00:01:04,930 --> 00:01:06,560
On "show us your songs"
are entered to win
33
00:01:06,590 --> 00:01:08,560
The competition
"show us your songs, toronto."
34
00:01:08,600 --> 00:01:10,100
Here we go
with our first act.
35
00:01:10,130 --> 00:01:11,170
Let's get it rollin'.
36
00:01:11,200 --> 00:01:12,170
She's canada's sweetheart.
37
00:01:12,200 --> 00:01:13,430
She's coming out
right now.
38
00:01:13,470 --> 00:01:14,700
It's mary belle edwards.
39
00:01:14,740 --> 00:01:16,600
Oh, show us
your song there.
40
00:01:16,640 --> 00:01:18,510
[soft music]
41
00:01:18,540 --> 00:01:20,840
- ♪ land of the silver birch
42
00:01:20,880 --> 00:01:23,540
♪ home of the beaver
43
00:01:23,580 --> 00:01:25,650
♪ where still
the mighty moose ♪
44
00:01:25,680 --> 00:01:28,850
♪ wanders at will
45
00:01:28,880 --> 00:01:31,550
- Oh!
- Oh, my goodness.
46
00:01:31,590 --> 00:01:33,290
Oh, my goodness.
47
00:01:33,320 --> 00:01:34,560
- And as to the drummer,
I just wanna
48
00:01:34,590 --> 00:01:36,960
Apologize to your people
and your ancestors
49
00:01:36,990 --> 00:01:39,060
For spilling your blood
all over this country
50
00:01:39,090 --> 00:01:40,760
For the past
hundreds of years.
51
00:01:40,800 --> 00:01:42,900
But that said,
what a fandango, okay.
52
00:01:42,930 --> 00:01:44,430
[laughs]
53
00:01:44,470 --> 00:01:47,430
And I'd just like to give you
a little surprise.
54
00:01:47,470 --> 00:01:49,070
Ladies and gentlemen--
- mary belle,
55
00:01:49,100 --> 00:01:51,210
You're gonna be a guest star
on "wheels ontario."
56
00:01:51,240 --> 00:01:52,570
- Oh, my gosh.
- "wheels ontario."
57
00:01:52,610 --> 00:01:54,370
- Oh, my gosh.
58
00:01:54,410 --> 00:01:56,310
- Okay.
- Oh.
59
00:01:56,340 --> 00:01:57,680
- Okay.
- She's gonna guest star
60
00:01:57,710 --> 00:02:00,450
On "wheels ontario"
with me bryan la croix.
61
00:02:00,480 --> 00:02:01,950
- Okay, bryan,
you've won nothing.
62
00:02:01,980 --> 00:02:03,250
Come back
to the judges' table.
63
00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:05,090
- And we might even
have a makeout scene.
64
00:02:05,120 --> 00:02:06,720
- The only actor who's been in
two generations
65
00:02:06,750 --> 00:02:09,660
Of "wheels ontario"
is gene creemers.
66
00:02:09,690 --> 00:02:12,660
[dubstep music]
67
00:02:12,690 --> 00:02:20,700
♪
68
00:02:24,210 --> 00:02:25,340
- The first time
I went to canada was
69
00:02:25,370 --> 00:02:26,670
I was at summer camp,
70
00:02:26,710 --> 00:02:30,080
And my group
went to montreal.
71
00:02:30,110 --> 00:02:32,380
I went to a peep show,
which is just, like--
72
00:02:32,410 --> 00:02:34,180
But this is pre-internet,
73
00:02:34,220 --> 00:02:35,450
Where you would go
to a booth
74
00:02:35,480 --> 00:02:37,780
With a little curtain
and close it.
75
00:02:37,820 --> 00:02:40,720
And you could choose, like,
different videos to watch.
76
00:02:40,760 --> 00:02:44,320
And, uh, I jerked off
in a booth.
77
00:02:44,360 --> 00:02:46,830
So--
78
00:02:46,860 --> 00:02:48,530
Who gets to edit this show?
79
00:02:48,560 --> 00:02:50,000
[laughter]
80
00:02:50,030 --> 00:02:51,700
[school bell rings]
81
00:02:51,730 --> 00:02:54,300
- Attention,
today's remembrance day.
82
00:02:54,340 --> 00:02:57,240
So remember to pick up
your canadian heroes
83
00:02:57,270 --> 00:02:59,340
Tea towel in the cafetorium.
84
00:02:59,370 --> 00:03:01,140
- Hey, legs, over here.
85
00:03:01,180 --> 00:03:03,980
- Oh, hey, cameron.
- [scoffs]
86
00:03:04,010 --> 00:03:06,380
"cameron" is my parental
guardian's name, all right?
87
00:03:06,410 --> 00:03:08,380
Call me cam.
- Okay, cool.
88
00:03:08,420 --> 00:03:10,250
Cam.
- You know what?
89
00:03:10,290 --> 00:03:12,220
You should get a partner for
the maple syrup games tonight.
90
00:03:12,250 --> 00:03:14,760
Everybody gets lucky
after the sap boil.
91
00:03:14,790 --> 00:03:16,360
- Cam, I'm gonna
be honest with you.
92
00:03:16,390 --> 00:03:17,990
I've never been
with a girl before.
93
00:03:18,030 --> 00:03:19,190
- Why don't you ask collette?
94
00:03:19,230 --> 00:03:20,930
She's a real calgary flame.
95
00:03:20,960 --> 00:03:23,860
- Collette--the prime minister
of student parliament?
96
00:03:23,900 --> 00:03:25,470
- Hey there, buddy.
How you doing there, mike?
97
00:03:25,500 --> 00:03:26,670
- Oh, hey, coach teacher.
98
00:03:26,700 --> 00:03:28,140
- Pardon me
for over-listening,
99
00:03:28,170 --> 00:03:30,200
But heard you're ready
to have some sex there then.
100
00:03:30,240 --> 00:03:31,410
- Thinkin' about it.
101
00:03:31,440 --> 00:03:32,670
- Collette's as fine
a specimen as any
102
00:03:32,710 --> 00:03:33,770
To start out with.
103
00:03:33,810 --> 00:03:35,140
I'm on my way
to the school nurse.
104
00:03:35,180 --> 00:03:36,380
Why don't you
heard there with me,
105
00:03:36,410 --> 00:03:37,580
Get ya a sex prep kit?
106
00:03:37,610 --> 00:03:39,250
- Oh, far out.
107
00:03:39,280 --> 00:03:40,280
- Let's do it, eh?
108
00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:43,280
[upbeat music]
109
00:03:43,320 --> 00:03:48,590
♪
110
00:03:54,330 --> 00:03:56,000
- You're in luck.
111
00:03:56,030 --> 00:03:58,300
Got the very last
government-issued sex kit here.
112
00:03:58,330 --> 00:03:59,630
- Oh, cool.
- Okay.
113
00:03:59,670 --> 00:04:01,030
I know sex
can be scary sometimes.
114
00:04:01,070 --> 00:04:02,770
So this will help you
make it fun and safe.
115
00:04:02,800 --> 00:04:04,300
Here's a maple-flavored
dental dam.
116
00:04:04,340 --> 00:04:05,740
It also glows in the dark.
117
00:04:05,770 --> 00:04:08,580
That's if you want to perform
some cunnilingus,
118
00:04:08,610 --> 00:04:09,910
And you can also
try rimming.
119
00:04:09,940 --> 00:04:11,510
Here's a vibrator for you.
120
00:04:11,550 --> 00:04:12,910
We've got the butt plug
as well.
121
00:04:12,950 --> 00:04:15,020
Can use it
for someone's exit.
122
00:04:15,050 --> 00:04:16,920
- It looks like a squid.
123
00:04:16,950 --> 00:04:18,850
- Do you have any questions
for me, michael?
124
00:04:18,890 --> 00:04:20,150
- What if
I'm not good at sex?
125
00:04:20,190 --> 00:04:21,460
Or what if
I'm so good at it,
126
00:04:21,490 --> 00:04:22,990
I become obsessed with it?
127
00:04:23,020 --> 00:04:25,890
Or what if it's something
I don't even know?
128
00:04:25,930 --> 00:04:28,100
I guess it just all
feels so complicated.
129
00:04:28,130 --> 00:04:29,500
- Well, I would try
the butt plug.
130
00:04:29,530 --> 00:04:31,000
Yeah.
- Cool.
131
00:04:31,030 --> 00:04:32,700
- One thing,
I would recommend using
132
00:04:32,730 --> 00:04:34,800
Some other prophylactics,
unless you wanna
133
00:04:34,840 --> 00:04:36,570
End up like your friend
toons over there.
134
00:04:36,600 --> 00:04:39,040
- Breathe it on out.
Breathe it on out, toons.
135
00:04:39,070 --> 00:04:40,770
And breathe out.
And good.
136
00:04:40,810 --> 00:04:42,240
That slimy
little butterball's
137
00:04:42,280 --> 00:04:44,310
Gonna drop right out of you.
[chuckles]
138
00:04:44,350 --> 00:04:46,450
- Oh, hey, mikey.
- Oh, hey, toons.
139
00:04:46,480 --> 00:04:48,320
Hey, coach teacher.
What are you doing down here?
140
00:04:48,350 --> 00:04:49,820
- Oh, I'm not just
a whirling coach.
141
00:04:49,850 --> 00:04:51,520
I also coach canadian lamaze.
142
00:04:51,550 --> 00:04:53,090
- And he's the father.
143
00:04:53,120 --> 00:04:54,860
- Oh, how far along
are you, toons?
144
00:04:54,890 --> 00:04:56,890
- Ten months.
- Oh, so you got time.
145
00:04:56,920 --> 00:04:58,060
- Well, mwah.
146
00:04:58,090 --> 00:04:59,390
Gotta go to the cafetorium,
147
00:04:59,430 --> 00:05:01,060
Work my shift at
the junior needle exchange.
148
00:05:01,100 --> 00:05:02,860
You be good,
you be good.
149
00:05:02,900 --> 00:05:04,730
- Thanks for sticking around,
mikey.
150
00:05:04,770 --> 00:05:07,200
- Oh, I gotta go.
Peace out, toons.
151
00:05:07,240 --> 00:05:09,200
- Peace out.
152
00:05:16,040 --> 00:05:17,540
- Hey, collette,
I don't know
153
00:05:17,580 --> 00:05:19,180
If we've ever formally
been introduced,
154
00:05:19,210 --> 00:05:20,710
But my name's mikey.
155
00:05:20,750 --> 00:05:21,850
- Gosh, I thought
your name was legs.
156
00:05:21,880 --> 00:05:23,520
- Oh, no, that's
my casual goof name
157
00:05:23,550 --> 00:05:25,420
That everyone call me
'cause they hate me.
158
00:05:25,450 --> 00:05:27,220
- Well, you just tell them
to hush up.
159
00:05:27,260 --> 00:05:29,020
- Maybe I won't be so harsh,
but I'll do that.
160
00:05:29,060 --> 00:05:30,760
- Say, I'd love to stay
and chat, eh,
161
00:05:30,790 --> 00:05:32,890
But I have minutes
to proofread, so--
162
00:05:32,930 --> 00:05:35,600
- Oh, no doubt,
no doubt.
163
00:05:35,630 --> 00:05:37,560
Hey, I was wondering,
collette,
164
00:05:37,600 --> 00:05:39,370
Would you be game
to being my partner
165
00:05:39,400 --> 00:05:43,170
At the maple games tonight?
166
00:05:43,200 --> 00:05:45,070
- Of course I will.
I'll see you there.
167
00:05:45,110 --> 00:05:46,970
- Oh, cool.
- Pardon me.
168
00:05:47,010 --> 00:05:49,140
- Awesome.
That's really exciting.
169
00:05:49,180 --> 00:05:51,210
- Oh, pardon me.
- Pardon.
170
00:05:51,250 --> 00:05:54,950
I guess I've got a date--
171
00:05:54,980 --> 00:05:57,280
A date with intercourse.
172
00:05:57,320 --> 00:06:00,690
[school bell rings]
173
00:06:00,720 --> 00:06:02,520
- You don't listen
to me about this.
174
00:06:02,560 --> 00:06:03,660
- I'm not gonna--
175
00:06:03,690 --> 00:06:05,760
- You got my jacket wet, man.
176
00:06:05,790 --> 00:06:07,690
Don't--
give me my glasses.
177
00:06:07,730 --> 00:06:10,860
May I have my glasses back?
178
00:06:13,230 --> 00:06:14,430
- We gotta go to venice.
179
00:06:14,470 --> 00:06:16,640
We gotta get your dog
in [bleep] bakersfield.
180
00:06:16,670 --> 00:06:18,910
- Yeah, that's what
I'm saying.
181
00:06:18,940 --> 00:06:20,810
- So let's go to bakersfield,
get the dog--
182
00:06:20,840 --> 00:06:22,710
- Because we can't--
you're not listening.
183
00:06:22,740 --> 00:06:25,450
We can't go to bakersfield
until we go to venice,
184
00:06:25,480 --> 00:06:28,150
Prune my friend's trees,
get some spaghetti--
185
00:06:28,180 --> 00:06:29,880
Don't do violence, man.
186
00:06:29,920 --> 00:06:31,720
Don't do violence.
Chester!
187
00:06:31,750 --> 00:06:32,890
- Man, you know what?
Forget you.
188
00:06:32,920 --> 00:06:35,220
- Chester, chill out, man.
189
00:06:35,260 --> 00:06:36,420
I'll spill your ice coffee.
190
00:06:36,460 --> 00:06:38,060
- Don't you [bleep]--
191
00:06:38,090 --> 00:06:39,160
- Why do we do this, man?
192
00:06:39,190 --> 00:06:40,760
- You're my best friend
in the world.
193
00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:43,600
- I love you, brother.
I love you, brother.
194
00:06:43,630 --> 00:06:45,330
What are you doing, man?
195
00:06:45,370 --> 00:06:47,570
That is not cool.
Give it.
196
00:06:47,600 --> 00:06:49,800
- Let's regroup and,
you know--
197
00:06:49,840 --> 00:06:51,410
- I don't need to regroup.
I'm grouped.
198
00:06:51,440 --> 00:06:53,710
Let's go.
199
00:06:53,740 --> 00:06:56,610
- Whoa, this cheese
is great.
200
00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:01,720
- You guys are the editors--
now you know that,
201
00:07:01,750 --> 00:07:03,150
'cause you will have
putted the chyron--
202
00:07:03,180 --> 00:07:04,580
"you will have 'putted'
the chyron"?
203
00:07:04,620 --> 00:07:06,320
- Yeah.
- You will have put the chyron
204
00:07:06,350 --> 00:07:08,120
That says,
"bill, dan, editors."
205
00:07:08,160 --> 00:07:10,760
- Yeah, this is guaranteed
to make the show.
206
00:07:10,790 --> 00:07:12,430
- What are some
of your passions, dan?
207
00:07:12,460 --> 00:07:17,000
- Uh, tv. I like video games.
Um, I'm--
208
00:07:17,030 --> 00:07:19,330
- You sound like
a [bleep] monster to me.
209
00:07:19,370 --> 00:07:21,030
- [chuckles]
yeah. Well, not really.
210
00:07:21,070 --> 00:07:23,500
I lost my virginity
when I was,
211
00:07:23,540 --> 00:07:25,910
I think, 23 or 24.
- Okay.
212
00:07:25,940 --> 00:07:27,540
Well, good on you,
it's gone.
213
00:07:27,580 --> 00:07:29,110
I was--I was 19.
214
00:07:29,140 --> 00:07:30,140
- I mean,
it's kind of late.
215
00:07:30,180 --> 00:07:31,310
It's a little late.
- Yeah.
216
00:07:31,350 --> 00:07:33,180
But you've been banging out
since then
217
00:07:33,210 --> 00:07:36,250
Like a mother[bleep], right?
218
00:07:38,350 --> 00:07:40,750
- [chuckles]
219
00:07:40,790 --> 00:07:42,960
No offense, could I ask you
a question?
220
00:07:42,990 --> 00:07:44,160
Are you hardly working?
221
00:07:44,190 --> 00:07:45,260
'cause I'm hardly hard.
222
00:07:45,290 --> 00:07:46,490
That didn't
come out right.
223
00:07:46,530 --> 00:07:49,230
- Oh, you dug yourself
a beautiful hole, bro.
224
00:07:49,260 --> 00:07:50,500
- That'll be 2.89.
225
00:07:50,530 --> 00:07:52,000
- Okay, maybe try this card,
226
00:07:52,030 --> 00:07:53,700
From jesus christ himself.
227
00:07:53,730 --> 00:07:55,700
[beep]
- this is declined.
228
00:07:55,740 --> 00:07:56,740
- That's impossible.
229
00:07:56,770 --> 00:07:58,170
The church has never
been stronger.
230
00:07:58,210 --> 00:08:00,110
How about you try this card
that pitbull gave me
231
00:08:00,140 --> 00:08:03,140
Directly in a commercial
for vodka?
232
00:08:03,180 --> 00:08:06,050
- This doesn't have
a magnetic strip at the end.
233
00:08:06,080 --> 00:08:07,180
- All right.
- You know what--
234
00:08:07,220 --> 00:08:09,050
- I wanna pay money too.
235
00:08:09,080 --> 00:08:11,250
- Okay, it's obvious you guys
don't have any money.
236
00:08:11,290 --> 00:08:13,790
- Interesting.
- Mm-hmm.
237
00:08:13,820 --> 00:08:16,120
- Peter, take a step back
with me to discuss business.
238
00:08:16,160 --> 00:08:17,660
- Two seconds.
239
00:08:17,690 --> 00:08:20,030
- Dude, we are in financial
duress right now.
240
00:08:20,060 --> 00:08:21,960
We need to figure out
a way out of this mess, bro.
241
00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:24,100
- Gotta find out a way
to make some money
242
00:08:24,130 --> 00:08:27,900
Without losing our integrity.
243
00:08:27,940 --> 00:08:30,900
[dubstep music]
244
00:08:30,940 --> 00:08:33,940
♪
245
00:08:33,980 --> 00:08:36,910
- ♪ get ready to go
246
00:08:36,940 --> 00:08:40,050
♪ get ready to go
247
00:08:40,080 --> 00:08:43,380
- So sage, bro,
you gotta talk to us.
248
00:08:43,420 --> 00:08:44,720
We have
so many questions, bro.
249
00:08:44,750 --> 00:08:46,150
What are we doing here?
250
00:08:46,190 --> 00:08:48,760
- It is very warm in here,
and I like it.
251
00:08:48,790 --> 00:08:50,460
So what's your plan,
gentlemen?
252
00:08:50,490 --> 00:08:52,490
- Basically,
p90x, crossfit.
253
00:08:52,530 --> 00:08:53,590
I shave my shoulders.
254
00:08:53,630 --> 00:08:54,930
And I just bought
a tongue scraper.
255
00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:56,630
- Chicks don't do that.
256
00:08:56,660 --> 00:08:58,030
- So what do then,
they very much go for?
257
00:08:58,070 --> 00:08:59,600
Mints inside
of necklaces, bro?
258
00:08:59,630 --> 00:09:01,200
Both: Oh.
- That's a start.
259
00:09:01,240 --> 00:09:02,670
You gotta have
your own style.
260
00:09:02,700 --> 00:09:04,340
What looks best on you?
261
00:09:04,370 --> 00:09:06,840
What makes you
feel the sexiest?
262
00:09:06,870 --> 00:09:08,680
- Having sex outside.
- Okay.
263
00:09:08,710 --> 00:09:10,980
Well, for me as far
as upstairs, goatee.
264
00:09:11,010 --> 00:09:13,410
As far as downstairs,
goatee, bro.
265
00:09:13,450 --> 00:09:15,850
- My pubes are shaved
into gargoyle wings.
266
00:09:15,880 --> 00:09:17,250
[phone vibrates]
267
00:09:17,290 --> 00:09:20,590
- Guys, how would you
like to meet
268
00:09:20,620 --> 00:09:23,720
Your first two clients
tonight?
269
00:09:23,760 --> 00:09:26,630
- Sage, what could we ever do
to very much repays you?
270
00:09:26,660 --> 00:09:28,230
- Oh, don't sweat it.
271
00:09:28,260 --> 00:09:30,630
Have fun,
you young [bleep] machines.
272
00:09:30,670 --> 00:09:32,630
[both laugh]
273
00:09:32,670 --> 00:09:34,100
But if you would like
to pay me back--
274
00:09:34,140 --> 00:09:35,300
You guys don't happen
to have, like,
275
00:09:35,340 --> 00:09:36,900
A shower I could use
later tonight, do you?
276
00:09:36,940 --> 00:09:38,610
Or maybe a place I could
take a nap inside?
277
00:09:38,640 --> 00:09:41,440
- Okay, very much
weird turn here.
278
00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:43,580
- I'll jerk you both off.
279
00:09:43,610 --> 00:09:44,980
- ♪ get ready to go
280
00:09:45,010 --> 00:09:49,980
♪
281
00:09:50,020 --> 00:09:51,420
- No offense, none taken.
282
00:09:51,450 --> 00:09:53,990
- ♪ ready to go
283
00:09:54,020 --> 00:09:55,290
- You were on degrassi.
284
00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:57,960
- I was, for, like,
17 years practically.
285
00:09:57,990 --> 00:09:59,230
- Really?
286
00:09:59,260 --> 00:10:01,190
Well, the show's been on
for 130 years, right?
287
00:10:01,230 --> 00:10:02,230
- Exactly, so--
288
00:10:02,260 --> 00:10:04,260
- It seems to me like
people in canada
289
00:10:04,300 --> 00:10:05,770
Know a lot more
about the states
290
00:10:05,800 --> 00:10:07,770
Than people in the states
know about canada.
291
00:10:07,800 --> 00:10:09,700
- Yes, I would definitely
say that's true.
292
00:10:09,740 --> 00:10:12,140
- Like, who's the first
president of canada?
293
00:10:12,170 --> 00:10:13,610
- Okay, well,
we don't have presidents.
294
00:10:13,640 --> 00:10:15,010
- Okay, that's
the first problem.
295
00:10:15,040 --> 00:10:16,280
- That's the first thing.
- Who would be the first--
296
00:10:16,310 --> 00:10:17,510
- We have prime ministers.
297
00:10:17,550 --> 00:10:18,650
- Who was the first
prime minister of canada?
298
00:10:18,680 --> 00:10:20,380
- And his name was
sir john a. Macdonald.
299
00:10:20,410 --> 00:10:21,720
- [laughs]
- and I'm--
300
00:10:21,750 --> 00:10:23,280
It's true though.
301
00:10:23,320 --> 00:10:26,320
[rock music]
302
00:10:28,890 --> 00:10:30,360
[school bell rings]
- [whistles]
303
00:10:30,390 --> 00:10:32,290
Okay, listen up,
everybody.
304
00:10:32,330 --> 00:10:33,830
Same rules as last year.
305
00:10:33,860 --> 00:10:36,200
You wanna go out,
you tap your tree,
306
00:10:36,230 --> 00:10:38,030
Gather your sap,
and the first coupling
307
00:10:38,070 --> 00:10:42,000
To bring back one liter
of maple syrup wins.
308
00:10:42,040 --> 00:10:43,940
- You need tips
on tappin' that sap, eh?
309
00:10:43,970 --> 00:10:45,070
- Oh, no, I listened
to the rules
310
00:10:45,110 --> 00:10:46,440
Very intently, so no.
Thank you though.
311
00:10:46,470 --> 00:10:47,870
- I'm not talking about sap.
312
00:10:47,910 --> 00:10:50,610
I'm talking about sex.
- Oh.
313
00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:52,010
No, I went to nurse teacher.
314
00:10:52,050 --> 00:10:54,450
I put a squid in my exit,
so I'm good to go.
315
00:10:54,480 --> 00:10:55,850
- That's all there is to it.
316
00:10:55,880 --> 00:10:57,050
Nobody wins
and nobody has fun.
317
00:10:57,080 --> 00:10:59,190
Hey.
[blows whistle]
318
00:10:59,220 --> 00:11:01,790
- Ooh, my sex prep kit.
319
00:11:01,820 --> 00:11:03,660
Better safe than sorry.
320
00:11:03,690 --> 00:11:05,290
- ♪ I think about you
321
00:11:05,330 --> 00:11:07,390
♪ and my world
just comes alive ♪
322
00:11:07,430 --> 00:11:10,860
♪ prettiest girl
I dream about ♪
323
00:11:10,900 --> 00:11:12,670
♪ she's not coming over
324
00:11:12,700 --> 00:11:15,670
- Oh, no.
325
00:11:15,700 --> 00:11:16,740
Let me give you a pull.
326
00:11:16,770 --> 00:11:18,670
- [grunts]
- sorry.
327
00:11:18,710 --> 00:11:19,870
I'm sorry about this mess.
328
00:11:19,910 --> 00:11:21,910
You must think I'm monstrous.
- Oh, no.
329
00:11:21,940 --> 00:11:24,380
Sex helps our vast country
stay populated.
330
00:11:27,010 --> 00:11:28,210
[pop music ringtone plays]
331
00:11:28,250 --> 00:11:29,320
- Oh, pardon.
332
00:11:29,350 --> 00:11:31,120
Someone's phoning me
on my mobile.
333
00:11:31,150 --> 00:11:34,120
Hello, this is michael gerald
mckenzie st. George.
334
00:11:34,160 --> 00:11:37,620
- Mikey, I'm 1/10,000
kilometers dilated.
335
00:11:37,660 --> 00:11:40,060
And I can't find
coach teacher.
336
00:11:40,090 --> 00:11:43,060
[upbeat music]
337
00:11:43,100 --> 00:11:45,430
- [humming]
338
00:11:45,470 --> 00:11:47,400
Satisfactory.
339
00:11:47,440 --> 00:11:51,040
- Do you think you could
come to the infirmatorium?
340
00:11:53,410 --> 00:11:55,940
Mikey?
341
00:11:57,110 --> 00:11:58,080
- ♪ yeah
342
00:11:58,110 --> 00:11:59,150
- What's up, everybody?
343
00:11:59,180 --> 00:12:00,950
It's me bryan la croix.
344
00:12:00,980 --> 00:12:02,520
- Bryan, what's your
ideal date?
345
00:12:02,550 --> 00:12:04,720
- We would kiss each other
on the mouth.
346
00:12:04,750 --> 00:12:06,450
- Bryan, what beverages
do you like to drink?
347
00:12:06,490 --> 00:12:08,820
- Of course water.
A shout-out to water.
348
00:12:08,860 --> 00:12:10,490
- Bryan, what do you think
of the haters?
349
00:12:10,520 --> 00:12:11,730
- Just a quick message
to the all critics
350
00:12:11,760 --> 00:12:13,690
Who have been
savaging my book--
351
00:12:13,730 --> 00:12:16,330
Uh, it's not for you,
it's for the fans.
352
00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:18,430
Shout-out to maureen
who lit herself on fire
353
00:12:18,470 --> 00:12:20,830
In protest against the critics'
negative response.
354
00:12:20,870 --> 00:12:22,840
I hope the burns didn't
melt your face too bad.
355
00:12:22,870 --> 00:12:23,940
And I'll come
and give you a kiss
356
00:12:23,970 --> 00:12:25,270
On the cheek real soon.
357
00:12:25,310 --> 00:12:26,440
- ♪ yeah
358
00:12:26,470 --> 00:12:27,740
- And stay tuned for
bryan la croix's
359
00:12:27,780 --> 00:12:30,180
New music video after
"wheels ontario."
360
00:12:33,780 --> 00:12:34,850
- Oh, good, you're here.
361
00:12:34,880 --> 00:12:35,920
Come on in.
I'm sorry.
362
00:12:35,950 --> 00:12:37,120
I'm on tokyo time.
363
00:12:37,150 --> 00:12:39,350
- Oh, that's very much
a coincidence,
364
00:12:39,390 --> 00:12:41,990
'cause I like to jerk off
to asian girls.
365
00:12:42,020 --> 00:12:43,720
- Did you brush your teeth?
- Basically.
366
00:12:43,760 --> 00:12:46,760
Dentyne ice mint.
- All right.
367
00:12:46,790 --> 00:12:47,760
I got a plane to catch.
368
00:12:47,800 --> 00:12:49,060
We got two hours,
let's go.
369
00:12:49,100 --> 00:12:50,930
Oh, you're circumcised,
right?
370
00:12:50,970 --> 00:12:53,530
- Basically, it looks like
a teenage mutant ninja turtle--
371
00:12:53,570 --> 00:12:55,740
Heroes in a half shell,
brah.
372
00:12:55,770 --> 00:12:58,100
- Oh, [bleep].
373
00:12:58,140 --> 00:13:01,840
- [crying]
374
00:13:01,880 --> 00:13:04,010
So is this your first time
hiring an escort, or--
375
00:13:04,040 --> 00:13:05,310
- We've saved up
for a while.
376
00:13:05,350 --> 00:13:06,510
- Yeah.
- Oh, cool.
377
00:13:06,550 --> 00:13:07,780
[crying]
378
00:13:07,820 --> 00:13:08,850
- [exhales]
379
00:13:08,880 --> 00:13:10,680
Are you ready for this?
380
00:13:10,720 --> 00:13:12,220
[soft piano music]
381
00:13:12,250 --> 00:13:13,320
I don't know, bro.
382
00:13:13,350 --> 00:13:14,550
This is a big deal,
383
00:13:14,590 --> 00:13:16,590
Lifelong dream
coming to fruition.
384
00:13:16,620 --> 00:13:18,760
- Hello?
I'm out here waiting.
385
00:13:18,790 --> 00:13:19,960
Whenever you're ready.
386
00:13:19,990 --> 00:13:22,260
- Bobby, you gotta
step up.
387
00:13:22,300 --> 00:13:24,660
You're the man in this
situation right now.
388
00:13:24,700 --> 00:13:28,030
God knows peter's probably
crying like a little baby.
389
00:13:28,070 --> 00:13:29,340
- Cry, baby, cry.
390
00:13:29,370 --> 00:13:30,840
- Cry, baby, cry.
- Cry, baby.
391
00:13:30,870 --> 00:13:31,970
- Where are you
from originally?
392
00:13:32,010 --> 00:13:33,640
- Massachusetts.
- Oh, "taxachusettes."
393
00:13:33,670 --> 00:13:35,540
- Oh, ain't that the truth?
- You a red sox fan?
394
00:13:35,580 --> 00:13:37,210
- A little bit.
- Get out of my face.
395
00:13:37,240 --> 00:13:38,510
[laughs]
396
00:13:41,350 --> 00:13:44,180
- Uh-oh, look what
the cat dragged in.
397
00:13:44,220 --> 00:13:46,190
- All right.
Let's do this.
398
00:13:46,220 --> 00:13:48,190
- Ooh. You must
be so stressed out,
399
00:13:48,220 --> 00:13:49,560
Being a working woman.
400
00:13:49,590 --> 00:13:52,890
- Okay, I got an uber
picking me up in 16 minutes.
401
00:13:52,930 --> 00:13:55,200
- Who's uber?
- It's my cab.
402
00:13:55,230 --> 00:13:56,230
- I'll drive you
to the airport.
403
00:13:56,260 --> 00:13:57,330
You don't need
some [bleep] guy
404
00:13:57,360 --> 00:13:58,700
Taking you to the airport.
405
00:13:58,730 --> 00:14:00,030
- It's a cab service.
406
00:14:00,070 --> 00:14:02,500
- Look, you're my girlfriend.
- No, I'm not.
407
00:14:02,540 --> 00:14:04,670
- Then what are you?
What are we doing here?
408
00:14:04,710 --> 00:14:07,540
- I'm paying you
to [bleep] me.
409
00:14:07,580 --> 00:14:09,580
- Oh.
410
00:14:09,610 --> 00:14:11,810
Oh, is that what you want?
- Yeah.
411
00:14:11,850 --> 00:14:13,010
- You just want me
to [bleep] you?
412
00:14:13,050 --> 00:14:14,010
- Yeah.
- Oh.
413
00:14:14,050 --> 00:14:15,050
- Yeah.
- Well, why didn't you
414
00:14:15,080 --> 00:14:17,020
[bleep] say so?
- I said it.
415
00:14:17,050 --> 00:14:19,650
Okay?
Mmm.
416
00:14:19,690 --> 00:14:22,320
- My mother's gonna love you.
417
00:14:22,360 --> 00:14:23,620
- Okay.
418
00:14:23,660 --> 00:14:26,030
I'm getting my vibrator.
419
00:14:26,060 --> 00:14:27,860
- What do you mean?
You didn't get anything?
420
00:14:27,900 --> 00:14:29,460
- She wouldn't pay me
in good conscience,
421
00:14:29,500 --> 00:14:31,400
Because due to some
un-foreskin events,
422
00:14:31,430 --> 00:14:33,670
I was unable to appease
an erection.
423
00:14:33,700 --> 00:14:35,370
- Well, what about you?
- Oh, it was great.
424
00:14:35,400 --> 00:14:37,540
Very weird, blew my mind,
very fun,
425
00:14:37,570 --> 00:14:39,010
- Money.
- Oh, no.
426
00:14:39,040 --> 00:14:41,770
I felt bad asking my new
mommy and daddy for money.
427
00:14:41,810 --> 00:14:44,510
- Hey.
428
00:14:44,550 --> 00:14:45,650
You the mother[bleep] that
429
00:14:45,680 --> 00:14:46,950
Been turning tricks
on our turf?
430
00:14:46,980 --> 00:14:49,080
- Hey, relax, guy.
431
00:14:49,120 --> 00:14:52,550
- Hey. You relax, guy.
432
00:14:52,590 --> 00:14:54,750
I don't like people
coming in and
433
00:14:54,790 --> 00:14:57,760
Suckin' and [bleep]
on our streets.
434
00:14:57,790 --> 00:14:59,730
- You wanna know what
my problem is with you, bro?
435
00:14:59,760 --> 00:15:02,060
Your bad breath.
436
00:15:02,100 --> 00:15:04,000
And there's only
one solution for that.
437
00:15:04,030 --> 00:15:06,400
[deep breath]
438
00:15:06,430 --> 00:15:09,840
Necklace mint?
439
00:15:09,870 --> 00:15:12,810
- Don't mind if I do.
440
00:15:12,840 --> 00:15:16,540
[laughter]
441
00:15:16,580 --> 00:15:19,450
All right.
You guys are pretty cool.
442
00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:21,280
You wanna live
in a house with us?
443
00:15:21,320 --> 00:15:23,480
- A gigolo house?
- Yeah.
444
00:15:23,520 --> 00:15:25,120
- ♪ get ready to go
445
00:15:25,150 --> 00:15:26,920
- It's date night
usa tonight.
446
00:15:26,950 --> 00:15:28,320
- I'm a prostitute.
447
00:15:28,360 --> 00:15:31,790
- Welcome to gigolo house.
448
00:15:31,830 --> 00:15:33,430
- And you haven't
lost your virginity yet?
449
00:15:33,460 --> 00:15:36,030
- No. No, no, no.
I haven't.
450
00:15:36,060 --> 00:15:37,600
But, you know what I mean?
451
00:15:37,630 --> 00:15:39,170
Like, I got close
a couple months ago.
452
00:15:39,200 --> 00:15:42,000
- Mm-hmm.
- [chuckles]
453
00:15:42,040 --> 00:15:43,300
- He doesn't know
we're rolling yet.
454
00:15:43,340 --> 00:15:44,970
- A girl let me
finger her.
455
00:15:45,010 --> 00:15:46,640
- Really?
- Yeah.
456
00:15:46,670 --> 00:15:48,440
- It was gross.
457
00:15:54,180 --> 00:15:55,820
- Breathe in,
breathe out.
458
00:15:55,850 --> 00:15:57,720
Breathe in, breathe out.
- [panting]
459
00:15:57,750 --> 00:15:58,750
- Push, toons.
460
00:15:58,790 --> 00:16:00,090
- Ooh, ooh.
461
00:16:00,120 --> 00:16:02,220
There you go, toons,
just like that.
462
00:16:02,260 --> 00:16:03,560
[soft music]
463
00:16:03,590 --> 00:16:05,060
♪ you made me
464
00:16:05,090 --> 00:16:08,090
♪ god only knows
you saved me ♪
465
00:16:08,130 --> 00:16:10,100
♪ and I know it shows
466
00:16:10,130 --> 00:16:13,470
♪ if I only I could
ever be ♪
467
00:16:13,500 --> 00:16:16,070
- Aah. Aah!
468
00:16:16,100 --> 00:16:17,500
- Push harder, toons.
469
00:16:17,540 --> 00:16:19,970
- [screaming]
470
00:16:20,010 --> 00:16:21,170
- Why don't you calm down,
toons?
471
00:16:21,210 --> 00:16:23,440
You're making a mess.
- Aah.
472
00:16:23,480 --> 00:16:25,510
[screams]
473
00:16:25,550 --> 00:16:27,550
- Looks how much blood
this is, toons.
474
00:16:27,580 --> 00:16:30,720
- [whimpers]
475
00:16:30,750 --> 00:16:33,750
- ♪ just put that
just for me to see ♪
476
00:16:33,790 --> 00:16:35,620
♪ I wonder
477
00:16:35,660 --> 00:16:36,920
♪ tell me
478
00:16:36,960 --> 00:16:40,060
♪ tell me that
you're by my side ♪
479
00:16:40,090 --> 00:16:41,960
- Oh, god,
here it comes.
480
00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:44,000
Ooh, it's a female.
481
00:16:44,030 --> 00:16:45,470
- Toons, I know
this is weird timing,
482
00:16:45,500 --> 00:16:47,030
But sex is so scary.
483
00:16:47,070 --> 00:16:50,470
[baby crying]
484
00:16:50,500 --> 00:16:51,770
- Okay, okay.
485
00:16:51,810 --> 00:16:53,310
Good round.
Good, good.
486
00:16:53,340 --> 00:16:54,740
[blows whistle weakly]
487
00:16:54,780 --> 00:16:56,080
Cool, seems like
we have a winner here.
488
00:16:56,110 --> 00:16:57,740
There's a real feather
in her cap.
489
00:16:57,780 --> 00:17:00,880
Uh, teachers have homework too,
so wrap it up.
490
00:17:00,910 --> 00:17:03,050
[school bell rings]
491
00:17:03,080 --> 00:17:05,490
Oh, sorry I'm late there.
492
00:17:05,520 --> 00:17:08,020
Couldn't leave the sap boil
unsupervised, could I?
493
00:17:08,060 --> 00:17:09,790
Here you go, brought you
some maple syrup,
494
00:17:09,820 --> 00:17:11,520
Just for you health there.
- Aw, right on.
495
00:17:11,560 --> 00:17:13,290
Breakfast in bed.
- [chuckles]
496
00:17:13,330 --> 00:17:16,300
- Hey, coach teacher,
was collette upset with me?
497
00:17:16,330 --> 00:17:18,630
- Well, mikey,
she sure was.
498
00:17:18,670 --> 00:17:20,130
But then she saw
what a good friend
499
00:17:20,170 --> 00:17:21,270
You'd been to toons,
500
00:17:21,300 --> 00:17:23,440
And she changed her tune
about you.
501
00:17:23,470 --> 00:17:26,610
In fact, mikey, she's waiting
in my classroom right now.
502
00:17:26,640 --> 00:17:28,040
No excuses there, boy.
503
00:17:28,080 --> 00:17:29,740
- Congratulations, toons.
504
00:17:29,780 --> 00:17:31,310
Congratulations,
coach teacher.
505
00:17:31,350 --> 00:17:32,880
You're gonna make
a wonderful father.
506
00:17:32,910 --> 00:17:34,250
- [chuckles]
never me.
507
00:17:34,280 --> 00:17:36,720
I signed a waiver of interest
in child.
508
00:17:36,750 --> 00:17:39,190
But toons here will qualify
for government support checks,
509
00:17:39,220 --> 00:17:40,490
Won't ya?
510
00:17:40,520 --> 00:17:42,190
- I do love receiving mail.
511
00:17:42,220 --> 00:17:43,660
- Outstanding.
Peace out.
512
00:17:43,690 --> 00:17:45,660
- Oh, peace out.
- Peace out.
513
00:17:45,690 --> 00:17:46,860
- Oh, peace out.
514
00:17:46,890 --> 00:17:48,460
[school bell rings]
515
00:17:48,500 --> 00:17:51,560
- ♪ you're all I know
516
00:17:51,600 --> 00:17:52,830
- Wow.
517
00:17:52,870 --> 00:17:55,770
You taste like a tim hortons
maple-dipped donut.
518
00:17:55,800 --> 00:17:58,500
- And my drive-thru's open
all night.
519
00:17:58,540 --> 00:17:59,640
- [chuckles]
520
00:17:59,670 --> 00:18:03,110
- ♪ as I look
through this telescope ♪
521
00:18:03,140 --> 00:18:04,380
- [gasps]
522
00:18:04,410 --> 00:18:05,980
- Aah!
523
00:18:06,010 --> 00:18:08,380
- All this blood is making me
conflicted about sex.
524
00:18:08,420 --> 00:18:10,880
- Sex helps our vast country
stay populated.
525
00:18:10,920 --> 00:18:12,750
- I signed a waiver
of interest in child.
526
00:18:12,790 --> 00:18:15,050
- Whoa.
527
00:18:15,090 --> 00:18:17,060
- If you're nervous,
528
00:18:17,090 --> 00:18:18,590
You can have
some of this.
529
00:18:18,630 --> 00:18:20,430
- Maybe just one
confidence gulp?
530
00:18:20,460 --> 00:18:21,790
- Mm.
531
00:18:24,900 --> 00:18:26,900
- Spicy.
532
00:18:29,370 --> 00:18:31,070
[school bell rings]
533
00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:32,570
- [whistles]
534
00:18:32,610 --> 00:18:35,310
[indistinct p.A. Announcement]
535
00:18:35,340 --> 00:18:38,140
Oh, hey there, michael.
536
00:18:38,180 --> 00:18:39,510
- Ooh.
537
00:18:39,550 --> 00:18:43,520
Ouch.
- So, mikey.
538
00:18:43,550 --> 00:18:46,190
Did you pop your don cherry?
539
00:18:51,390 --> 00:18:53,390
- I don't know.
540
00:19:00,030 --> 00:19:01,600
- Get off my foot.
- I'm not on your foot.
541
00:19:01,640 --> 00:19:03,440
- Get off my foot.
- Don't push me, man.
542
00:19:03,470 --> 00:19:05,510
- Don't do violence, man.
- Stop requested.
543
00:19:05,540 --> 00:19:06,610
- Stop it, man.
544
00:19:06,640 --> 00:19:08,010
Don't reroll the tarp
on the bus.
545
00:19:08,040 --> 00:19:09,180
- Don't tell me
what to do, man.
546
00:19:09,210 --> 00:19:10,740
You live your life.
547
00:19:10,780 --> 00:19:12,450
- I'm not giving you
these socks back, man.
548
00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:14,110
- You better give me those.
549
00:19:14,150 --> 00:19:15,950
I'll pull 'em right
off of your feet.
550
00:19:15,980 --> 00:19:18,950
- This guy stole a lobster
from pike's in seattle.
551
00:19:21,820 --> 00:19:22,890
- Hi, honey.
552
00:19:22,920 --> 00:19:24,990
- Just getting rid
of my toys, mom.
553
00:19:25,030 --> 00:19:27,460
I'm ready for
the real thing.
554
00:19:27,490 --> 00:19:31,960
[train engine chugging]
555
00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:33,770
[pop music]
556
00:19:33,800 --> 00:19:39,040
♪ whoa, whoa, girl
557
00:19:39,070 --> 00:19:42,210
♪ could you be the first
to take me all the way? ♪
558
00:19:42,240 --> 00:19:44,110
♪ I ain't a little boy
no more ♪
559
00:19:44,140 --> 00:19:45,340
♪ I'm throwin' my toys away
560
00:19:45,380 --> 00:19:47,480
♪ trade my scooter
for a skateboard ♪
561
00:19:47,510 --> 00:19:49,020
♪ leave the crust
on my bread ♪
562
00:19:49,050 --> 00:19:50,650
♪ I'm done with
taking baths ♪
563
00:19:50,680 --> 00:19:52,350
♪ I'm taking showers instead
564
00:19:52,390 --> 00:19:54,050
♪ got my braces off
565
00:19:54,090 --> 00:19:56,620
♪ I'm almost ready
to shave ♪
566
00:19:56,660 --> 00:19:57,990
♪ I'm not afraid
of cooties ♪
567
00:19:58,030 --> 00:19:59,860
♪ I'm all manly and brave
568
00:19:59,890 --> 00:20:01,330
♪ so send in a selfie
569
00:20:01,360 --> 00:20:03,000
♪ and in ten words
or less ♪
570
00:20:03,030 --> 00:20:05,230
♪ tell us why you
got to be the one ♪
571
00:20:05,270 --> 00:20:07,070
♪ to win this contest
572
00:20:07,100 --> 00:20:08,700
♪ the first time is sacred
573
00:20:08,740 --> 00:20:10,700
♪ wanna share it with you
574
00:20:10,740 --> 00:20:12,210
♪ to get with me naked
575
00:20:12,240 --> 00:20:14,710
♪ girl, one thing
you got to do ♪
576
00:20:14,740 --> 00:20:15,880
- ♪ whoa
577
00:20:15,910 --> 00:20:17,340
♪ you got
to enter to win ♪
578
00:20:17,380 --> 00:20:18,980
♪ a chance to be with me
579
00:20:19,010 --> 00:20:22,880
♪ so I can enter you
and lose my virginity ♪
580
00:20:22,920 --> 00:20:24,380
♪ you must be 18 to win
581
00:20:24,420 --> 00:20:26,350
♪ no purchase necessary
582
00:20:26,390 --> 00:20:28,350
♪ and I'm like
whoa, whoa, yeah ♪
583
00:20:28,390 --> 00:20:29,460
♪ yeah, come on, baby
584
00:20:29,490 --> 00:20:31,020
♪ enter to win
585
00:20:31,060 --> 00:20:32,860
- It's the enter to win
sweepstakes.
586
00:20:32,890 --> 00:20:34,530
One grand prize winner
and three friends
587
00:20:34,560 --> 00:20:36,200
Will be flown to ontario,
where they'll get
588
00:20:36,230 --> 00:20:38,900
To meet bryan in a hotel
and take his virginity.
589
00:20:38,930 --> 00:20:41,170
Get your parents' okay
to take a selfie
590
00:20:41,200 --> 00:20:42,600
And send it in
a stamped envelope
591
00:20:42,640 --> 00:20:44,040
To the bryan la croix
fan club.
592
00:20:44,070 --> 00:20:45,200
- ♪ got to enter to win
593
00:20:45,240 --> 00:20:47,210
♪ a chance to be with me
594
00:20:47,240 --> 00:20:50,780
♪ so I can enter you
and lose my virginity ♪
595
00:20:50,810 --> 00:20:53,110
♪ come on, girl,
don't be shy ♪
596
00:20:53,150 --> 00:20:56,550
I'm so excited for whoever
wins the contest.
597
00:20:56,580 --> 00:20:58,880
It's gonna be
a really tender night.
598
00:20:58,920 --> 00:21:01,220
- And watch "wheels ontario"
weekends at 9:00.
599
00:21:01,260 --> 00:21:02,260
- Haha.
600
00:21:02,290 --> 00:21:03,690
Good at bizness.
601
00:21:06,160 --> 00:21:07,330
[ethereal vocal chant music]
602
00:21:07,360 --> 00:21:11,960
- [grunts]
603
00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:13,470
[gasps]
604
00:21:13,500 --> 00:21:15,270
No offense, none taken.
605
00:21:15,300 --> 00:21:16,840
- ♪ ohh
606
00:21:16,870 --> 00:21:19,770
- [grunts]