1 00:00:11,518 --> 00:00:13,452 Halt! 2 00:00:13,487 --> 00:00:15,237 I've got to hand it to this perp. 3 00:00:15,289 --> 00:00:17,406 No one's broken out of the infinetentiary before. 4 00:00:17,458 --> 00:00:20,542 He's either the bravest time-convict I've ever seen or the dumbest. 5 00:00:21,578 --> 00:00:23,595 Ow! Ohh! 6 00:00:23,630 --> 00:00:26,698 My time-knee! Oh, time-dang it! 7 00:00:26,734 --> 00:00:30,224 - Definitely the dumbest. - Freeze! You're surrounded by 8 00:00:30,259 --> 00:00:33,472 the time paradox avoidance enforcement squadron. 9 00:00:33,507 --> 00:00:37,642 Anything you say can and already has been used against you in future court. 10 00:00:37,678 --> 00:00:40,345 This is it, Blendin. End of the timeline. 11 00:00:40,397 --> 00:00:42,347 Any last words? 12 00:00:42,399 --> 00:00:44,683 Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh... I-I-I-I... 13 00:00:44,735 --> 00:00:48,587 I invoke Globnar! 14 00:00:48,622 --> 00:00:51,273 Globnar!!! 15 00:00:51,325 --> 00:00:54,493 Very well, speak the name and century of those accused. 16 00:00:54,528 --> 00:00:56,495 The two kids that ruined my life, 17 00:00:56,530 --> 00:00:59,598 Dipper and Mabel Pines, 21st century. 18 00:01:05,456 --> 00:01:06,638 So be it. 19 00:01:06,673 --> 00:01:11,543 May time baby have mercy on their souls. 20 00:01:55,499 --> 00:01:57,699 Candy! Candy! Candy! Candy. 21 00:01:58,786 --> 00:02:02,688 - No! It's trapped! - Everything is terrible forever! 22 00:02:02,723 --> 00:02:04,757 Psst. Hey, dudes. You want to know a trick? 23 00:02:04,792 --> 00:02:06,692 Boppity-boop-womp! 24 00:02:06,727 --> 00:02:08,093 A genius taught me that once. 25 00:02:08,129 --> 00:02:12,097 This just in. Weather stations are calling for a candy blizzard! 26 00:02:12,133 --> 00:02:16,735 Forget taking off the wrappers. I'm eating these now! 27 00:02:16,787 --> 00:02:19,104 Soos, you are the greatest human ever to live. 28 00:02:20,808 --> 00:02:22,775 That was a mistake! 29 00:02:22,810 --> 00:02:25,711 Hey, no sweat, dude. I'd do anything for the Pines family. 30 00:02:25,746 --> 00:02:29,782 Soos! I need to scratch myself in two places at once. 31 00:02:29,817 --> 00:02:30,950 And I mean anything. 32 00:02:30,985 --> 00:02:32,184 Coming, Mr. Pines! 33 00:02:34,188 --> 00:02:36,155 Whoa, better make sure he gets his wallet back. 34 00:02:36,190 --> 00:02:39,825 Wait, I've never seen Soos's wallet before. 35 00:02:39,860 --> 00:02:42,728 Don't you want to learn some Soos secrets? 36 00:02:42,763 --> 00:02:44,196 I don't know if we should be... Whoa! 37 00:02:44,231 --> 00:02:46,865 Soos has a membership to Laser Tag? 38 00:02:46,901 --> 00:02:48,834 I didn't know they let grown-ups in there. 39 00:02:48,869 --> 00:02:51,737 And look, emergency salami. 40 00:02:51,772 --> 00:02:54,006 Soos, my respect for you has grown. 41 00:02:54,041 --> 00:02:56,909 Jesus Alzamirano Ramirez, 42 00:02:56,944 --> 00:02:59,144 organ donor, birthday: July 13th. 43 00:02:59,180 --> 00:03:01,146 Wait a minute. That's today. 44 00:03:01,182 --> 00:03:03,749 - Whoa. - That's weird. 45 00:03:03,784 --> 00:03:04,817 I wonder why he didn't tell anyone. 46 00:03:04,852 --> 00:03:07,720 Uh, duh. It's probably because he wants someone 47 00:03:07,755 --> 00:03:10,856 to throw him a surprise party. I can relate. 48 00:03:10,891 --> 00:03:12,858 I've been waiting for a surprise party my whole life. 49 00:03:12,893 --> 00:03:14,710 Surprise! 50 00:03:15,830 --> 00:03:18,897 - Too little, too late, Chiu. - Ohh. 51 00:03:21,202 --> 00:03:24,970 More exclamation points! More, I say! 52 00:03:25,006 --> 00:03:26,972 Wow, you guys thought of everything. 53 00:03:27,008 --> 00:03:29,859 - Grenda, twins are born birthday experts. - We've shared 54 00:03:29,860 --> 00:03:33,578 every birthday together so we know how to make them perfect. 55 00:03:35,116 --> 00:03:37,750 Hey, places, everyone. I hear footsteps. 56 00:03:37,785 --> 00:03:39,918 Everyone, be quiet! 57 00:03:39,987 --> 00:03:41,987 All right, you promised a giant hummingbird, 58 00:03:41,989 --> 00:03:44,073 so I'm expecting to see a giant hummingbird. 59 00:03:44,125 --> 00:03:46,959 Three, two, one... 60 00:03:46,994 --> 00:03:48,193 Huh? 61 00:03:48,229 --> 00:03:49,962 Surprise! 62 00:03:49,997 --> 00:03:53,832 Happy birthday, you king on Earth. We got everything you love. 63 00:03:53,868 --> 00:03:56,168 Cake-flavored pizza. Pizza-flavored cake. 64 00:03:56,203 --> 00:03:57,836 And one more treat. 65 00:03:59,106 --> 00:04:04,009 Razzle dazzle, friends. It's me, the Razz Dazzler. 66 00:04:04,045 --> 00:04:06,745 This is what my life has become. 67 00:04:06,781 --> 00:04:08,847 I...I... 68 00:04:08,883 --> 00:04:12,101 Quick, everyone pose for the birthday smiles memory album. 69 00:04:12,153 --> 00:04:15,020 ♪ razzly-dazzly-doo ♪ 70 00:04:17,992 --> 00:04:19,158 Soos, what's wrong? 71 00:04:19,193 --> 00:04:22,761 It's, uh, it's nothing. I, uh... 72 00:04:22,797 --> 00:04:25,163 I gotta go fix a pipe or something. 73 00:04:26,934 --> 00:04:28,700 Whoa, did you guys see Soos? 74 00:04:28,736 --> 00:04:31,770 What happened to... Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no. 75 00:04:31,806 --> 00:04:34,039 Okay, you guys didn't know, so it's not your fault, 76 00:04:34,075 --> 00:04:35,974 but Soos hates his birthday. 77 00:04:36,010 --> 00:04:38,043 - What? - It's a total mystery. 78 00:04:38,079 --> 00:04:40,012 I guess he's been like this since he was a kid. 79 00:04:40,047 --> 00:04:42,014 Some weird personal biz. 80 00:04:42,049 --> 00:04:44,116 There's gotta be something we can do. 81 00:04:44,151 --> 00:04:47,086 - We've tried everything. - I even petitioned the government 82 00:04:47,121 --> 00:04:48,954 to have this day removed from calendars. 83 00:04:48,989 --> 00:04:50,823 Now I'm not allowed on airplanes. 84 00:04:55,896 --> 00:04:57,029 I don't know, guys, 85 00:04:57,064 --> 00:04:58,997 maybe we should just leave him alone, you know? 86 00:04:59,033 --> 00:05:00,833 No one should be alone on their birthday. 87 00:05:00,868 --> 00:05:03,836 There's got to be a way to cheer him up. We just need to try harder. 88 00:05:03,871 --> 00:05:05,037 You're right, Dipper! 89 00:05:05,072 --> 00:05:07,940 It's time for us to bring out the big guns. 90 00:05:09,944 --> 00:05:12,878 All right, guys, blindfold me once, shame on you, 91 00:05:12,913 --> 00:05:14,746 blindfold me twice... Wait a minute. 92 00:05:14,799 --> 00:05:16,048 Hot dog smell? 93 00:05:16,083 --> 00:05:18,150 Sticky floors? Future sounds? 94 00:05:20,754 --> 00:05:23,055 Laser Tag? I love Laser Tag. 95 00:05:23,090 --> 00:05:24,756 How did you guys know? 96 00:05:24,792 --> 00:05:27,025 Um. We definitely didn't rifle through your wallet. 97 00:05:29,096 --> 00:05:31,029 Welcome to the year 8,000. 98 00:05:31,065 --> 00:05:33,065 Society? Collapsed. 99 00:05:33,100 --> 00:05:35,734 Fog machines? Everywhere. 100 00:05:35,769 --> 00:05:38,070 Are these walls just mattresses spray-painted purple? 101 00:05:38,105 --> 00:05:40,038 I think this place used to be a mattress store. 102 00:05:40,074 --> 00:05:42,975 I don't know, guys, I'm not sure I'm up for this today. 103 00:05:43,010 --> 00:05:45,144 Don't worry, Soos. As soon as you start playing with us, 104 00:05:45,162 --> 00:05:46,879 you're gonna have a great time. 105 00:05:46,914 --> 00:05:49,915 We promise, no matter what happens we won't leave your side. 106 00:05:49,950 --> 00:05:52,751 Well, I guess, I could give it a shot. 107 00:05:52,786 --> 00:05:53,886 Prepare for laser battle 108 00:05:53,921 --> 00:05:55,087 in three, two... 109 00:05:57,958 --> 00:06:02,094 Uh-oh. Better tie down these cowboys. 110 00:06:05,799 --> 00:06:08,834 Whoa! This is even cooler than I imagined. 111 00:06:08,869 --> 00:06:11,803 Look how real these laser guys are. 112 00:06:12,907 --> 00:06:14,106 Kick deflected. 113 00:06:14,141 --> 00:06:16,808 Thank you for buying Digicod, the smart codpiece. 114 00:06:16,810 --> 00:06:19,811 - Wait, what? - Oh, no. 115 00:06:19,847 --> 00:06:21,813 Soos! 116 00:06:21,815 --> 00:06:23,982 Mabel? Dipper? Dudes? 117 00:06:24,018 --> 00:06:25,150 Soos! 118 00:06:25,186 --> 00:06:28,754 Nice try, but that's solid timetanium, kid. 119 00:06:28,789 --> 00:06:30,889 There's only one way out of here. 120 00:06:30,925 --> 00:06:32,758 Through me! 121 00:06:34,128 --> 00:06:38,080 Oh, uh, sorry. Come on. 122 00:06:38,132 --> 00:06:41,733 Through me! And that's what it would have been like 123 00:06:41,769 --> 00:06:44,136 if I'd just gotten it right the very first chance, 124 00:06:44,171 --> 00:06:45,871 but it still is effective. 125 00:06:48,588 --> 00:06:50,879 The time traveler guy! 126 00:06:50,915 --> 00:06:53,048 What did you say your name was again? 127 00:06:53,084 --> 00:06:55,751 Blendo? Blondin? 128 00:06:55,786 --> 00:06:57,786 - Blarblar. - There it is. 129 00:06:57,822 --> 00:07:00,789 It's Blendin! Blendin Blenjamin Blendin. 130 00:07:00,825 --> 00:07:03,642 How could you not know my name after you ruined my life?! 131 00:07:04,728 --> 00:07:06,628 Initiate flashback! 132 00:07:06,664 --> 00:07:08,764 It was after you stole my time device 133 00:07:08,799 --> 00:07:10,616 to win your stupid pig. 134 00:07:10,651 --> 00:07:13,001 I was cast out of the time anomaly removal crew... 135 00:07:13,037 --> 00:07:14,870 my whole life's purpose. 136 00:07:14,905 --> 00:07:16,004 And then I was given 137 00:07:16,040 --> 00:07:18,841 ten squared life sentences in time prison. 138 00:07:18,876 --> 00:07:21,810 I've spent every day since then planning my vengeance. 139 00:07:23,914 --> 00:07:27,816 And now finally, it has come! 140 00:07:27,852 --> 00:07:29,836 Look, we're sorry about all that, but we're in 141 00:07:29,837 --> 00:07:31,820 the middle of something really important right now. 142 00:07:31,856 --> 00:07:32,988 It's our friend's birthday today, 143 00:07:33,023 --> 00:07:34,957 and we promised we wouldn't leave his side. 144 00:07:34,992 --> 00:07:38,627 What?! You think some dumb birthday matters right now? 145 00:07:38,662 --> 00:07:42,831 - Do you know where you are? - Welcome to Globnar! 146 00:07:51,859 --> 00:07:55,711 - Is this a reality show? - Are we in Japan? 147 00:07:55,746 --> 00:07:59,581 It's gladiatorial time combat! 148 00:08:02,620 --> 00:08:05,787 The winner gets a precious time wish 149 00:08:05,789 --> 00:08:07,956 and then decides the loser's fate. 150 00:08:07,992 --> 00:08:09,791 N-N-No! Please! 151 00:08:14,665 --> 00:08:17,533 And the two of you are officially challenged. 152 00:08:17,568 --> 00:08:19,801 Dundgren! Get me my war paint. 153 00:08:19,854 --> 00:08:21,003 Dipper, we need a way out of here. 154 00:08:21,038 --> 00:08:26,008 - But how? - I have an idea. 155 00:08:26,043 --> 00:08:28,644 Hang in there, Soos, we're coming for you. 156 00:08:28,679 --> 00:08:31,680 Dipper? Mabel? Requesting back-up. 157 00:08:31,715 --> 00:08:32,748 Ah! Ah! 158 00:08:32,783 --> 00:08:34,583 Oh! Ah! Oh, no. 159 00:08:34,618 --> 00:08:38,020 - Laser Robbie. - Dudes? 160 00:08:41,625 --> 00:08:45,594 Oh, my stars. Could it be my little, um... 161 00:08:45,629 --> 00:08:48,797 Lolphy! It's me. 162 00:08:48,832 --> 00:08:53,988 Your great-great-great-great- great-great-great 163 00:08:54,029 --> 00:08:57,405 grandmother from the past times. 164 00:08:58,809 --> 00:08:59,808 Gam-gam? 165 00:09:01,612 --> 00:09:03,779 Yeah, neon green is good. This is a good color for me. 166 00:09:03,814 --> 00:09:05,814 It's fierce... Huh? What? No! 167 00:09:05,849 --> 00:09:08,684 You can't let them escape! Stop there! 168 00:09:08,686 --> 00:09:10,586 Gam-gam, how could you? 169 00:09:10,621 --> 00:09:12,821 I ain't no one's Gam-gam, sucka! 170 00:09:12,856 --> 00:09:14,740 You just got time tricked! 171 00:09:14,775 --> 00:09:16,992 - No! - No! 172 00:09:17,027 --> 00:09:19,595 Hurry! Back to Soos' birthday. 173 00:09:19,630 --> 00:09:21,730 Okay. I think I've got it. 174 00:09:27,605 --> 00:09:32,040 - Uhh. Are we back? - Oh, no! Look! 175 00:09:32,076 --> 00:09:34,610 Mable, the laser place is a mattress store. 176 00:09:34,645 --> 00:09:36,979 - We went too far in the past. - Time travel. 177 00:09:37,014 --> 00:09:41,917 Man, why you gotta be so complicated? Huh?! 178 00:09:41,952 --> 00:09:44,886 Looks like they overshot their destination by 10 years. 179 00:09:44,922 --> 00:09:47,689 I don't see them. You better find those kids! 180 00:09:47,725 --> 00:09:49,591 You'll get your justice, Blendin. 181 00:09:49,627 --> 00:09:51,760 I'm gonna keep stammering until you find them. 182 00:09:51,795 --> 00:09:55,030 I-I-I-I... 183 00:09:55,065 --> 00:09:57,032 - I hate that guy. - Let's move. 184 00:09:59,903 --> 00:10:02,704 Yeah! 185 00:10:02,740 --> 00:10:04,740 Okay, we just got to go forward 10 years. 186 00:10:04,775 --> 00:10:07,709 We can be back before Soos even realizes we were gone. 187 00:10:07,745 --> 00:10:10,912 Oh, no! The timey thing. It's busted. 188 00:10:10,948 --> 00:10:14,049 - Can you fix it? - Maybe. I'll need some tools. 189 00:10:14,084 --> 00:10:17,886 And I think I know where to get some. 190 00:10:19,923 --> 00:10:22,808 Let's try to lay low. We don't want to change the future. 191 00:10:22,843 --> 00:10:25,978 Or cause the future. I forget how this works exactly. 192 00:10:26,013 --> 00:10:28,597 Wow, 10 years in the past. 193 00:10:28,599 --> 00:10:31,016 Everything is samey but also differenty. 194 00:10:31,468 --> 00:10:34,770 ♪ Doppity-doppity-doo ♪ Yeah! 195 00:10:34,805 --> 00:10:38,907 Look out Broadway, here I come. 196 00:10:38,942 --> 00:10:43,845 - This dream goes nowhere, Toby! - Aww, marbles. 197 00:10:45,082 --> 00:10:46,948 Whoa. Oops. Sorry. 198 00:10:48,018 --> 00:10:49,618 My friend thinks you're cute. 199 00:10:49,653 --> 00:10:52,754 - Oh, my gosh. Tambry, shut up. - Ow! Hey! 200 00:10:52,790 --> 00:10:53,989 Thank you. 201 00:10:54,024 --> 00:10:57,693 I mean you're super young, so this is weird. 202 00:10:57,728 --> 00:10:59,628 Now you know how she feels, creep. 203 00:10:59,663 --> 00:11:02,898 Yeah, I... Huh. Wow. 204 00:11:02,933 --> 00:11:04,833 Wow. 205 00:11:04,868 --> 00:11:07,736 Schlep right up, ladies and gentlemen, 206 00:11:07,771 --> 00:11:08,904 to see my latest attraction. 207 00:11:08,939 --> 00:11:12,741 - All right, the coast is clear. - Now is our chance. 208 00:11:17,715 --> 00:11:19,748 Ha! Bingo! 209 00:11:19,783 --> 00:11:21,016 All right, let's see. 210 00:11:21,051 --> 00:11:24,820 Aw, come on, candy. Fall. Fall. 211 00:11:24,855 --> 00:11:25,987 Allow me. 212 00:11:26,023 --> 00:11:28,023 You just need to know a guy on the inside. 213 00:11:28,058 --> 00:11:30,692 Bippity-boop-womp! 214 00:11:30,728 --> 00:11:31,693 Jackpot! 215 00:11:33,731 --> 00:11:36,965 Thanks, dawg. You must be some kind of genius. 216 00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:39,034 All right, I think I've got this thing working. 217 00:11:39,069 --> 00:11:41,603 Dipper, Dipper, look. 218 00:11:41,638 --> 00:11:42,938 No way. 219 00:11:44,808 --> 00:11:47,743 Mi precioso, you keep wandering off. 220 00:11:47,778 --> 00:11:49,644 You don't want to be late for your big day. 221 00:11:49,680 --> 00:11:51,713 Sorry, abuelita. 222 00:11:51,749 --> 00:11:53,949 Big day? This could be the birthday 223 00:11:53,984 --> 00:11:55,951 where that personal biz went down. 224 00:11:55,986 --> 00:11:58,887 We could finally find out why Soos hates his birthday. 225 00:11:58,922 --> 00:12:00,889 All right, but let's be quick. 226 00:12:00,924 --> 00:12:03,592 I want a piece of birthday cake! 227 00:12:05,696 --> 00:12:07,929 Who's a handsome birthday boy? 228 00:12:07,965 --> 00:12:09,765 It's you! 229 00:12:09,800 --> 00:12:12,000 Soos, you are such a ladies' man. 230 00:12:12,035 --> 00:12:14,035 They're my cousins, grandma. Gross. 231 00:12:14,071 --> 00:12:16,605 I got you a race car cake. 232 00:12:16,640 --> 00:12:18,039 Man, I don't know why Soos hates his birthdays. 233 00:12:18,075 --> 00:12:19,040 This looks great. 234 00:12:21,078 --> 00:12:22,978 Sorry, dude, but could you move seats? 235 00:12:23,013 --> 00:12:25,847 - That's the seat of honor. - Uh, who's it for? 236 00:12:25,883 --> 00:12:28,784 Oh. Heh. It's for my dad, actually. 237 00:12:28,819 --> 00:12:31,887 I haven't seen him in, like, 8 years, but he's coming today. 238 00:12:31,922 --> 00:12:33,922 That must be him! 239 00:12:41,648 --> 00:12:44,065 All right, Soos, today's the big day. 240 00:12:44,101 --> 00:12:46,067 Be cool. Be cool. 241 00:12:48,839 --> 00:12:52,741 Postcard for... Soos. 242 00:12:58,015 --> 00:13:01,716 "See you next year for sure. Dad." 243 00:13:01,752 --> 00:13:04,886 Hey, don't sweat it, cuz. You'll see him next year. 244 00:13:04,922 --> 00:13:08,623 Ha. Yeah, next year. 245 00:13:11,695 --> 00:13:14,830 I'm gonna go lay down. You party without me, dudes. 246 00:13:14,865 --> 00:13:15,964 Wait, what about your presents? 247 00:13:15,999 --> 00:13:16,998 Yay-uh. 248 00:13:20,037 --> 00:13:22,871 So that's why Soos hates his birthday. 249 00:13:22,906 --> 00:13:25,740 It's the day he realized his dad wasn't coming back. 250 00:13:25,776 --> 00:13:28,777 So how much partying can fix that? 251 00:13:28,812 --> 00:13:31,338 Dorks. Young Robbie. 252 00:13:34,412 --> 00:13:36,512 Ay, Soos' father is a dead-beat. 253 00:13:41,585 --> 00:13:46,355 Soos, I made you cookies shaped like dinosaurs. 254 00:13:46,390 --> 00:13:48,490 I don't want cookies. I want to see dad again. 255 00:13:48,526 --> 00:13:51,694 And he wants to see you. He's just... busy. 256 00:13:51,729 --> 00:13:54,663 - Busy in New Orleans? - Ay. Yes. 257 00:13:54,699 --> 00:13:57,700 Trust me, you will feel better one day. 258 00:14:00,304 --> 00:14:03,539 - Ohh, this is awful. - We promised Soos a happy birthday, 259 00:14:03,574 --> 00:14:05,474 but how can we give him that now? 260 00:14:05,509 --> 00:14:07,543 This goes beyond anything we know how to fix. 261 00:14:07,578 --> 00:14:09,611 - This way! - Mabel, hide! 262 00:14:12,650 --> 00:14:16,318 They've got to be around here somewhere. I think I heard them! 263 00:14:16,354 --> 00:14:18,620 Freeze! 264 00:14:20,458 --> 00:14:22,491 Trace their chrono-signatures. 265 00:14:22,526 --> 00:14:25,627 Man, the sooner I defeat those kids in Globnar, 266 00:14:25,663 --> 00:14:27,663 the sooner I can win my time wish. 267 00:14:27,698 --> 00:14:29,665 Tell you what I'd do if I had a time wish. 268 00:14:29,700 --> 00:14:32,368 Retire early, spend more time with the kids. 269 00:14:32,403 --> 00:14:34,436 Nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah with the kids?! 270 00:14:34,472 --> 00:14:36,739 Don't you know a time wish can literally do anything? 271 00:14:36,774 --> 00:14:39,725 Any impossible problem solved, just like that. 272 00:14:39,777 --> 00:14:41,577 I mean, imagine the possibilities. 273 00:14:41,612 --> 00:14:43,679 Wait, Mabel, that's it, the time wish. 274 00:14:43,714 --> 00:14:45,614 If we defeat Blendin in that space battle... 275 00:14:45,649 --> 00:14:46,715 Then we can wish 276 00:14:46,751 --> 00:14:49,385 that Soos' dad came to his 12th birthday. 277 00:14:49,420 --> 00:14:51,286 And Soos' birthdays would be fixed forever... 278 00:14:51,322 --> 00:14:52,388 all of them! 279 00:14:52,423 --> 00:14:54,656 But do you really think we can win Globnar? 280 00:14:54,692 --> 00:14:56,525 It's the only chance we have. 281 00:14:56,560 --> 00:15:01,429 Besides, it's for Soos. He would do the same for us. 282 00:15:04,268 --> 00:15:06,335 Here we are, Blendin. We surrender. 283 00:15:06,387 --> 00:15:07,703 - It's them! - Freeze! 284 00:15:07,721 --> 00:15:09,338 Careful, they're from the past. 285 00:15:09,390 --> 00:15:11,507 They might have powder muskets or slap bracelets. 286 00:15:11,509 --> 00:15:13,342 Look, guys, no tricks this time. 287 00:15:13,377 --> 00:15:14,643 We're ready to challenge you, okay? 288 00:15:14,678 --> 00:15:17,346 Yes! Let the Globnar begin. 289 00:15:17,398 --> 00:15:20,616 Prepare for Globnar!!! 290 00:15:23,270 --> 00:15:24,486 Hey, turns out I can mute him. 291 00:15:24,522 --> 00:15:28,323 - Man, I wish we'd known that earlier. - Initializing. 292 00:15:35,466 --> 00:15:39,535 Globnar! Globnar! Globnar! Globnar! 293 00:15:49,513 --> 00:15:51,346 Silence! 294 00:15:51,382 --> 00:15:52,548 Whoo! Oh, yeah! 295 00:15:54,518 --> 00:15:56,585 That is one big baby. 296 00:15:56,620 --> 00:15:58,520 Welcome, Globnar tributes. 297 00:15:58,556 --> 00:16:02,224 I have a very important nap to get to, so let's make this quick. 298 00:16:02,276 --> 00:16:04,393 You each have a chance to settle your time-feud 299 00:16:04,445 --> 00:16:06,595 through gladiatorial combat. 300 00:16:06,630 --> 00:16:08,564 You will have until time baby finishes 301 00:16:08,616 --> 00:16:11,433 drinking the cosmic sand in this hourglass. 302 00:16:11,469 --> 00:16:12,568 No! 303 00:16:12,570 --> 00:16:14,236 Come on. It's good for you. 304 00:16:15,372 --> 00:16:17,924 Get ready, kids. When I get that time wish, 305 00:16:17,925 --> 00:16:19,241 you'll wish you were never born. 306 00:16:19,276 --> 00:16:20,709 Or rather, you'll wish you were born, 307 00:16:20,744 --> 00:16:22,628 because I'm gonna wish you were never born! 308 00:16:22,663 --> 00:16:26,448 - Dream on! There's two of us. - And we have hair! 309 00:16:26,484 --> 00:16:29,551 Oh... oh, yeah? Well, I have training! 310 00:16:31,555 --> 00:16:33,589 What do you think I did in prison all that time? 311 00:16:33,624 --> 00:16:34,590 Uh-oh. 312 00:16:34,625 --> 00:16:37,476 Let the Globnar begin! 313 00:17:01,485 --> 00:17:02,551 Yeah! 314 00:17:14,465 --> 00:17:16,632 Globnar! 315 00:17:19,303 --> 00:17:22,571 Very good. You have escaped the Cyclocks. 316 00:17:22,606 --> 00:17:25,374 Yes! Blendin for the almost-win! 317 00:17:26,677 --> 00:17:30,229 There is only one final challenge for Globnar. 318 00:17:30,281 --> 00:17:33,315 An ancient game, thousands of years old, 319 00:17:33,350 --> 00:17:36,518 chosen for its exemplification of pure strategy. 320 00:17:36,554 --> 00:17:40,322 The ancient art of Laser Tag! 321 00:17:42,626 --> 00:17:46,295 The one who touches the victory orb first will win. 322 00:17:46,330 --> 00:17:48,730 Laser Tag? Seriously? 323 00:17:48,766 --> 00:17:51,400 Oh, I know it doesn't seem that challenging now, 324 00:17:51,435 --> 00:17:53,669 but just wait until they turn on that fog machine. 325 00:17:53,704 --> 00:17:55,337 You'll be done for. 326 00:17:55,339 --> 00:17:57,406 - You just wait until you... - Hit. 327 00:17:57,441 --> 00:17:59,391 Hit, hit, hit, hit. 328 00:17:59,426 --> 00:18:01,610 - Oh, man. - Mabel, grab the orb! 329 00:18:01,645 --> 00:18:03,245 Got it. 330 00:18:06,317 --> 00:18:08,267 It is finished! 331 00:18:14,358 --> 00:18:15,557 No! 332 00:18:15,593 --> 00:18:17,559 - No! No! - Yes! Yes! 333 00:18:17,595 --> 00:18:20,495 You have made victory in Globnar. 334 00:18:20,531 --> 00:18:22,447 Before I give you your time wish, 335 00:18:22,499 --> 00:18:26,368 tell us what fate do you decide for the loser? 336 00:18:26,370 --> 00:18:30,238 - Oh, jeez. - Death! 337 00:18:30,274 --> 00:18:32,674 - Mabel. - Sorry. Got carried away. 338 00:18:32,710 --> 00:18:36,461 So Blendin did try to wish us out of existence, 339 00:18:36,513 --> 00:18:39,247 but it was kind of our fault for ruining his life. 340 00:18:39,283 --> 00:18:42,484 Yeah, and he's kind of too sad to be a real bad guy. 341 00:18:42,519 --> 00:18:44,486 Maybe if we treat him right in the present, 342 00:18:44,521 --> 00:18:46,388 he'll turn out better in the future. 343 00:18:46,423 --> 00:18:48,490 Okay, as long as you keep an eye on him, 344 00:18:48,525 --> 00:18:51,526 we'd like to set Blendin free and restore his position 345 00:18:51,562 --> 00:18:53,428 at the time anomaly correction unit. 346 00:18:53,464 --> 00:18:57,265 - And give him pretty hair. - So be it. 347 00:18:58,485 --> 00:19:01,303 What? You'd do that for me? 348 00:19:01,338 --> 00:19:04,506 I got my job back! I feel like hugging somebody. 349 00:19:04,541 --> 00:19:07,309 - I can kill you in eight different ways. - Yes, sir. 350 00:19:07,344 --> 00:19:12,331 Now, children, what is it that you want for your time wish? 351 00:19:12,383 --> 00:19:15,617 Thank you, but the wish isn't for us. 352 00:19:15,653 --> 00:19:18,687 Not you? But then who? 353 00:19:18,722 --> 00:19:22,357 Who is worthy to receive such power? 354 00:19:23,527 --> 00:19:25,360 Dipper? Mabel? 355 00:19:25,396 --> 00:19:27,663 Ah, who am I kidding? I'm not up for this. 356 00:19:28,732 --> 00:19:30,599 Heads, I stay. 357 00:19:30,634 --> 00:19:33,368 Tails, I go make myself some dinosaur shaped cookies. 358 00:19:40,411 --> 00:19:43,245 Huh. That's unconventional. 359 00:19:45,749 --> 00:19:47,616 - Soos! - Guys! 360 00:19:47,651 --> 00:19:50,252 We're so sorry we left you hanging, dude. 361 00:19:50,287 --> 00:19:52,354 We got caught up in this time travel junk. 362 00:19:52,389 --> 00:19:53,655 And there was a time cyclops. 363 00:19:53,691 --> 00:19:54,656 And don't forget about the 364 00:19:54,692 --> 00:19:56,291 - time race. - Time race. 365 00:19:56,326 --> 00:19:57,659 But the point is, Soos, 366 00:19:57,695 --> 00:20:00,262 we think we know how to fix your birthday. 367 00:20:00,297 --> 00:20:01,496 Whoa. Really? 368 00:20:01,532 --> 00:20:04,566 Wait, you guys did all of that for me? 369 00:20:04,601 --> 00:20:08,553 And that's not all. Behold your time wish, 370 00:20:08,605 --> 00:20:12,741 the power to alter time, paradox-free, in any way you choose. 371 00:20:12,776 --> 00:20:15,094 We think the only thing that can make you happy 372 00:20:15,095 --> 00:20:17,412 - is meeting your dad. - But the choice is yours. 373 00:20:17,448 --> 00:20:20,282 You mean, I can finally see my dad by touching this thing? 374 00:20:20,317 --> 00:20:22,317 And you guys battled through time and space 375 00:20:22,319 --> 00:20:23,485 just to get this for me? 376 00:20:25,789 --> 00:20:27,656 What are you waiting for, Soos? 377 00:20:29,359 --> 00:20:31,359 All right. Here goes nothing. 378 00:20:36,417 --> 00:20:37,382 - Wait, what? - What the... 379 00:20:37,418 --> 00:20:39,634 Bam! Fixed you up. Enjoy, dudes. 380 00:20:39,670 --> 00:20:41,670 But, Soos, what about meeting your dad? 381 00:20:41,705 --> 00:20:43,772 Well, birthdays are supposed to be spent 382 00:20:43,807 --> 00:20:45,574 with the people who care about you. 383 00:20:45,609 --> 00:20:46,775 But you know what? 384 00:20:46,810 --> 00:20:49,344 That dude didn't care about me enough to visit me once, 385 00:20:49,379 --> 00:20:51,747 let alone fight monsters through time and space like you dudes. 386 00:20:51,782 --> 00:20:54,683 I mean, you had a gladiator fight just to make me happy. 387 00:20:54,718 --> 00:20:56,685 I've been being ridiculous this whole time. 388 00:20:56,720 --> 00:20:58,720 Whoever my dad was, he could take a hike. 389 00:20:58,756 --> 00:21:02,357 I know who my family is now, and it's you dudes. 390 00:21:02,392 --> 00:21:04,559 Thanks for giving me the best birthday ever. 391 00:21:04,595 --> 00:21:06,461 Are you kidding me?! 392 00:21:06,497 --> 00:21:08,563 Do you have any idea what you've just wasted? 393 00:21:08,582 --> 00:21:11,266 Do you know how many have died to get a time wish? 394 00:21:11,301 --> 00:21:12,734 The wars that were started? 395 00:21:12,770 --> 00:21:14,302 Oh, that's not all, dudes. 396 00:21:14,338 --> 00:21:15,670 I also wished for the slice of infinite pizza. 397 00:21:15,706 --> 00:21:16,705 Watch. 398 00:21:19,343 --> 00:21:20,709 And it can do that for, like, infinity. 399 00:21:22,446 --> 00:21:23,712 Phew! That's a good time wish. 400 00:21:23,747 --> 00:21:26,281 There's still 10 minutes before Laser Tag closes. 401 00:21:26,316 --> 00:21:28,350 - You dudes want to play? - Yeah. 402 00:21:29,553 --> 00:21:31,653 Happy birthday, Soos. 403 00:21:31,688 --> 00:21:33,755 Whoa. Thought I heard an explosion. 404 00:21:33,791 --> 00:21:35,290 Whoa, what's this? 405 00:21:36,181 --> 00:21:38,199 Mystery Shack? 406 00:21:38,444 --> 00:21:41,279 That is it! You are single-handedly 407 00:21:41,281 --> 00:21:43,614 the worst handyman I've ever seen. 408 00:21:43,665 --> 00:21:45,499 Uh, hey, excuse me, sir. 409 00:21:45,534 --> 00:21:48,419 Hey you, gumdrop, think you can fix a golf cart? 410 00:21:48,453 --> 00:21:51,289 - Well, I don't know if I... - Boom, you're hired. 411 00:21:51,340 --> 00:21:52,757 One size fits all. 412 00:21:52,791 --> 00:21:54,675 Step right up to the Mystery Shack, folks. 413 00:21:54,710 --> 00:21:56,276 Step right up.