1
00:00:01,109 --> 00:00:03,170
They've scored five
touchdowns in this game...
2
00:00:03,195 --> 00:00:04,494
Wow. Check this out.
3
00:00:04,530 --> 00:00:06,264
Coach and May's foreign exchange student
4
00:00:06,289 --> 00:00:07,755
just added me as a friend.
5
00:00:07,791 --> 00:00:09,724
Montsie. His name is Montsie.
6
00:00:09,759 --> 00:00:11,592
I didn't know they had a
foreign exchange student.
7
00:00:11,628 --> 00:00:13,061
I didn't know they
moved to North Carolina.
8
00:00:13,096 --> 00:00:14,429
Neither did I.
9
00:00:14,464 --> 00:00:16,297
- They moved to North Carol... what?
- Yeah.
10
00:00:16,333 --> 00:00:18,633
How did none of us know about
this? How is that possible?
11
00:00:18,668 --> 00:00:21,102
- Eh, they moved. It happened.
- We need to make more of an effort.
12
00:00:21,137 --> 00:00:23,037
We don't even know that our friend
has moved to a different state.
13
00:00:23,073 --> 00:00:24,305
I mean, we're still friends.
14
00:00:24,341 --> 00:00:26,140
We just have nothing
to do with each other.
15
00:00:26,176 --> 00:00:27,241
This doesn't bother you?
16
00:00:27,277 --> 00:00:28,509
Realistically, we'll probably see 'em
17
00:00:28,545 --> 00:00:30,478
two or three more times before we die.
18
00:00:30,513 --> 00:00:32,313
And it's sad, but
it's also not that sad.
19
00:00:32,349 --> 00:00:33,815
- What?
- Who cares? What's for dinner?
20
00:00:33,850 --> 00:00:35,350
I care.
21
00:00:35,385 --> 00:00:37,018
McKenna, please. Please,
don't do this. Okay? I mean,
22
00:00:37,053 --> 00:00:39,320
what about that formal
swimwear ad I got you? McKenna?
23
00:00:39,356 --> 00:00:40,955
McKen...?
24
00:00:40,990 --> 00:00:43,124
Well, guys! It happened again.
25
00:00:43,159 --> 00:00:46,454
A big agency stole
another one of my clients.
26
00:00:46,479 --> 00:00:48,260
And I have a big audition today.
27
00:00:48,285 --> 00:00:49,697
- Gosh darn it. You know what?
- Jess!
28
00:00:49,733 --> 00:00:51,265
Those pretty boys don't deserve you.
29
00:00:51,301 --> 00:00:53,655
Which one is McKenna? Is he
the gaunt, heroin-hot one?
30
00:00:53,680 --> 00:00:56,020
That's Jean Francois.
He got poached last week.
31
00:00:56,056 --> 00:00:58,823
McKenna's the one that looked
like a jacked Bryant Gumbel.
32
00:00:58,858 --> 00:01:00,295
- Oh...
- And this is a huge deal!
33
00:01:00,320 --> 00:01:02,160
It's the Sausage Crunchies account!
34
00:01:02,195 --> 00:01:03,461
Why would a dog food company
35
00:01:03,496 --> 00:01:05,815
be interested in a bunch of hot models?
36
00:01:05,840 --> 00:01:07,031
- Oh, no, it's, uh...
- No, no, no.
37
00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:08,499
Sausage Crunchies are people food.
38
00:01:08,535 --> 00:01:10,034
They're like brown cheese snacks.
39
00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:11,869
Yeah, it's like space
food. I-I put them in soup.
40
00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:13,071
I just really wanted to show
41
00:01:13,106 --> 00:01:14,772
this casting agency that I was legit.
42
00:01:14,808 --> 00:01:16,707
Now, if I go down
there with just Donovan,
43
00:01:16,743 --> 00:01:18,476
I'm gonna look like a no-name hustler.
44
00:01:18,511 --> 00:01:19,765
- Gosh darn it.
- Should I go out now,
45
00:01:19,790 --> 00:01:21,679
and try to find new clients,
or should I concentrate
46
00:01:21,714 --> 00:01:24,082
on the one client that I have left?
47
00:01:24,107 --> 00:01:26,912
You know, they're probably
sniffing around Donovan as we speak.
48
00:01:26,947 --> 00:01:28,078
Crap.
49
00:01:28,121 --> 00:01:29,369
Is that what he wants
to talk to me about?
50
00:01:29,394 --> 00:01:30,822
He said he wanted to talk
to me about something.
51
00:01:30,848 --> 00:01:31,885
Is that what he wanted
to talk to me about?
52
00:01:31,910 --> 00:01:33,257
- These poachers.
- Cece... Cece, calm.
53
00:01:33,293 --> 00:01:34,892
You concentrate on Donovan.
54
00:01:34,928 --> 00:01:37,228
I'll go see if I can
drum up some new clients.
55
00:01:37,263 --> 00:01:39,764
Very sweet, but the audition
is in six hours from now.
56
00:01:39,799 --> 00:01:41,566
So we have no time to
look for new clients.
57
00:01:41,601 --> 00:01:44,001
Well, recruiting is just like
sales, I mean selling a job
58
00:01:44,037 --> 00:01:46,914
is just like selling
drugs. I do that every day.
59
00:01:46,939 --> 00:01:50,267
Are you offering to help, too?
60
00:01:50,314 --> 00:01:52,658
Honestly, I wasn't.
61
00:01:52,691 --> 00:01:55,113
But based on how intensely
you're staring at me,
62
00:01:55,148 --> 00:01:57,849
I guess I've boxed myself
into a corner here, so...
63
00:01:57,884 --> 00:01:59,884
Great! Okay. You concentrate on Donovan.
64
00:01:59,919 --> 00:02:02,299
We'll get the models. Heads in, guys.
65
00:02:02,324 --> 00:02:03,331
- What?
- "Heads in"?
66
00:02:03,356 --> 00:02:05,690
- No. It's "hands in."
- I'm pretty sure it's "heads in."
67
00:02:05,725 --> 00:02:07,692
What are we supposed to do?
Smoosh our heads together?
68
00:02:07,727 --> 00:02:09,362
- Yeah.
- Everybody. Hands in.
69
00:02:09,387 --> 00:02:10,695
- Hands in.
- Hands in.
70
00:02:12,456 --> 00:02:13,475
Meow.
71
00:02:13,500 --> 00:02:14,599
- Winston!
- What?
72
00:02:14,634 --> 00:02:16,979
- How are you not tired of this?
- Tired of what?
73
00:02:18,582 --> 00:02:20,581
Synced and corrected by Aaronnmb
www.addic7ed.com
74
00:02:22,682 --> 00:02:25,610
Okay, model types, 3:00.
75
00:02:25,645 --> 00:02:28,079
- Take a bow.
- Wait, those two oatmeal men?
76
00:02:28,114 --> 00:02:29,780
Follow my lead.
77
00:02:29,816 --> 00:02:31,401
How did we ever date the same dude?
78
00:02:31,426 --> 00:02:32,846
Hey!
79
00:02:32,871 --> 00:02:36,487
Kampai. That's Japanese for "What's up?"
80
00:02:36,523 --> 00:02:38,156
Hi! Jessica Day.
81
00:02:38,191 --> 00:02:39,462
What are we celebrating?
82
00:02:39,487 --> 00:02:41,883
Kirby here works for a marine biologist.
83
00:02:41,908 --> 00:02:44,862
and he got them to name a new
species of sea slug after me.
84
00:02:44,898 --> 00:02:47,838
- Oh!
- It's called Bruce's Eastern Sea Slug.
85
00:02:47,863 --> 00:02:49,252
You two are fascinating.
86
00:02:49,277 --> 00:02:51,399
Have you ever considered modeling?
87
00:02:51,424 --> 00:02:53,478
- I actually have. A-a lot.
- Us?
88
00:02:53,503 --> 00:02:55,696
- I have a rich fantasy life.
- Oh.
89
00:02:55,721 --> 00:02:57,108
I can't wait to hear more about that.
90
00:02:57,143 --> 00:02:58,643
Sounds so great.
91
00:02:58,678 --> 00:02:59,783
What are you doing?
92
00:02:59,808 --> 00:03:01,580
Those guys are obviously
not model material.
93
00:03:01,605 --> 00:03:04,141
Because they're not cookie-cutter hot?
94
00:03:04,166 --> 00:03:05,970
Cece needs a bunch of different guys,
95
00:03:05,995 --> 00:03:07,785
so don't judge a book by its cover.
96
00:03:07,820 --> 00:03:09,320
Except when you're talking about models.
97
00:03:09,355 --> 00:03:11,472
Models exist to be on covers.
98
00:03:11,497 --> 00:03:12,990
I think that's an oversimplification.
99
00:03:13,026 --> 00:03:14,926
I think the best models have something
100
00:03:14,961 --> 00:03:16,494
to give them a little personality.
101
00:03:16,529 --> 00:03:18,963
Something, something that
makes them stand apart.
102
00:03:18,998 --> 00:03:21,254
Like a gap in their lower teeth,
103
00:03:21,279 --> 00:03:22,633
or a neck nipple.
104
00:03:22,669 --> 00:03:24,847
You're making this way too complicated.
105
00:03:24,872 --> 00:03:26,323
Look, this is all it needs to be...
106
00:03:26,348 --> 00:03:27,838
you walk up to a hot guy, okay?
107
00:03:27,874 --> 00:03:29,472
And you say "Hey, you're hot.
108
00:03:29,497 --> 00:03:30,489
"Do you want to be a model?"
109
00:03:30,514 --> 00:03:32,065
You have to forge a
connection with them.
110
00:03:32,090 --> 00:03:33,666
And that way they
entrust us with the thing
111
00:03:33,691 --> 00:03:34,910
that makes them really beautiful.
112
00:03:34,935 --> 00:03:36,614
You know what? You do your thing.
113
00:03:36,649 --> 00:03:37,882
I'll do my thing.
114
00:03:37,917 --> 00:03:39,617
But your thing cannot be
115
00:03:39,652 --> 00:03:41,340
going back to the slug guys.
116
00:03:41,365 --> 00:03:42,987
Sea slugs, Reagan.
117
00:03:43,022 --> 00:03:45,192
They're sea slug guys.
118
00:03:46,231 --> 00:03:47,959
But you're right.
119
00:03:47,994 --> 00:03:50,176
You're nasty about it, but you're right.
120
00:03:51,097 --> 00:03:52,296
So, Donovan,
121
00:03:52,332 --> 00:03:54,479
you have something you want to tell me?
122
00:04:11,106 --> 00:04:14,318
I've... made a big decision.
123
00:04:14,354 --> 00:04:15,553
No, Donovan, don't.
124
00:04:15,588 --> 00:04:17,388
I'm gonna stop wearing beanies.
125
00:04:17,745 --> 00:04:19,627
- Wait, what?
- I think. I...
126
00:04:19,690 --> 00:04:22,704
That's what you wanted
to talk to me about?
127
00:04:22,729 --> 00:04:25,263
I thought some big agency
was trying to poach you.
128
00:04:25,298 --> 00:04:26,430
No.
129
00:04:26,466 --> 00:04:28,344
They've just been sending me baskets
130
00:04:28,369 --> 00:04:31,202
and trying to take me to
fancy dinners and stuff.
131
00:04:31,237 --> 00:04:32,220
What?
132
00:04:32,245 --> 00:04:33,604
They've just been giving me baskets
133
00:04:33,640 --> 00:04:35,024
- and trying...
- Listen to me, okay?
134
00:04:35,049 --> 00:04:37,720
I know that gift baskets are great.
135
00:04:37,745 --> 00:04:38,729
- Yeah.
- They are.
136
00:04:38,754 --> 00:04:40,663
But once BGE signs you,
137
00:04:40,688 --> 00:04:42,171
there are no more baskets.
138
00:04:42,196 --> 00:04:43,714
Because they don't care about you.
139
00:04:43,750 --> 00:04:46,250
All they care about are numbers.
140
00:04:46,286 --> 00:04:48,052
But you, Donovan,
141
00:04:48,087 --> 00:04:50,888
you are my first priority.
142
00:04:50,923 --> 00:04:52,741
So when you're with me,
143
00:04:52,766 --> 00:04:55,071
you will never feel neglected.
144
00:04:55,096 --> 00:04:57,028
Just tell me what you need. I got you.
145
00:04:57,063 --> 00:04:58,529
I need someone to help me get better
146
00:04:58,564 --> 00:05:00,531
at tricks on my motorcycle.
147
00:05:00,566 --> 00:05:02,299
Sure.
148
00:05:03,370 --> 00:05:05,236
Mmm.
149
00:05:05,271 --> 00:05:07,088
I really hate these things.
I just can't stop eating 'em.
150
00:05:07,113 --> 00:05:08,439
I got to say, the taste is average,
151
00:05:08,474 --> 00:05:10,941
but the aftertaste is outstanding.
152
00:05:10,977 --> 00:05:13,700
What happens when I'm just
an outstanding aftertaste?
153
00:05:13,725 --> 00:05:14,772
Hmm?
154
00:05:14,797 --> 00:05:17,248
When I move out, are you guys
gonna forget about me like Coach?
155
00:05:17,283 --> 00:05:19,798
This loft is what tethers us together.
156
00:05:19,823 --> 00:05:21,824
And once it's gone,
157
00:05:21,849 --> 00:05:23,653
we're gonna be spread across the Earth
158
00:05:23,678 --> 00:05:25,056
like Rod Stewart's offspring.
159
00:05:25,091 --> 00:05:27,715
What I'm gonna miss most
about you is all this poetry.
160
00:05:27,740 --> 00:05:28,817
No, no, no. You know what,
161
00:05:28,842 --> 00:05:30,766
do not give up on us already.
162
00:05:30,791 --> 00:05:33,086
We just need to find something
that keeps us together.
163
00:05:33,111 --> 00:05:34,736
Like a dark secret or a time-share.
164
00:05:34,761 --> 00:05:36,567
You know, it was easier
when men went to war.
165
00:05:36,602 --> 00:05:38,736
You'd forge an unbreakable bond
166
00:05:38,761 --> 00:05:40,517
in a crucible of blood and pain.
167
00:05:40,542 --> 00:05:43,533
You can't get that splitting
the cost of toilet paper.
168
00:05:43,558 --> 00:05:45,743
We just need to come up
with some sort of ritual.
169
00:05:45,778 --> 00:05:46,811
Yes! Now you're thinking.
170
00:05:46,846 --> 00:05:48,579
We stand in a circle, right?
171
00:05:48,614 --> 00:05:51,482
- We burn chicken bones, all right?
- Dear Lord, Winston.
172
00:05:51,517 --> 00:05:52,983
- Then we're just secretive about it.
- This is the wrong ritual...
173
00:05:53,019 --> 00:05:54,285
I'm just saying no one knows about it.
174
00:05:54,320 --> 00:05:56,477
- I didn't literally mean a ritual.
- Oh.
175
00:05:56,502 --> 00:05:59,368
I just mean, like, a shared
experience, one that bonds us together.
176
00:05:59,393 --> 00:06:01,842
I've been saying this for the
longest time, but I'm really ready
177
00:06:01,867 --> 00:06:04,351
to get super weird into metal
detectors if you guys are.
178
00:06:04,376 --> 00:06:06,697
- That's, sure, that's one idea.
- You can look for treasure.
179
00:06:06,733 --> 00:06:08,265
Nickels, dimes, quarters.
180
00:06:08,301 --> 00:06:09,533
If you find enough, um,
181
00:06:09,569 --> 00:06:11,369
said treasure or change,
182
00:06:11,404 --> 00:06:12,970
supplement your income.
183
00:06:13,005 --> 00:06:14,305
It's also entertaining.
184
00:06:14,340 --> 00:06:17,108
While looking, there's,
uh, an endorphin rush.
185
00:06:17,143 --> 00:06:19,586
It's entertainment, it's
income... uh, ritual.
186
00:06:19,611 --> 00:06:21,991
Why don't we get tracksuits
and play chess at the park?
187
00:06:22,016 --> 00:06:23,347
I already got a chess crew.
188
00:06:26,386 --> 00:06:28,652
You do that right outside of the loft?
189
00:06:28,688 --> 00:06:30,592
- Yeah, right outside the loft.
- How have I never seen you once?
190
00:06:30,617 --> 00:06:32,334
'Cause you don't go outside of the loft.
191
00:06:32,561 --> 00:06:33,825
That's just not true.
192
00:06:33,850 --> 00:06:36,381
Fellas, fellas, fellas, I got it.
193
00:06:36,406 --> 00:06:37,858
Yeah? Metal detectors?
194
00:06:39,332 --> 00:06:41,177
That's a super cool idea, man.
195
00:06:41,202 --> 00:06:43,898
I appreciate the idea. I
want to hear more about it.
196
00:06:44,697 --> 00:06:46,530
I feel like I'm being teased.
197
00:06:48,461 --> 00:06:50,271
Let me guess, you guys are pre-gaming
198
00:06:50,296 --> 00:06:51,937
before your high school reunion.
199
00:06:51,976 --> 00:06:54,444
You were nerds, but you
grew up to be super handsome.
200
00:06:54,479 --> 00:06:55,712
You were cool but approachable.
201
00:06:55,747 --> 00:06:57,213
Maybe you were rollerbladers...
202
00:06:57,248 --> 00:06:58,548
Okay. Here's the deal.
203
00:06:58,590 --> 00:06:59,756
You're all models now,
204
00:06:59,784 --> 00:07:00,991
and that's your new manager.
205
00:07:01,016 --> 00:07:03,152
H-hold on a sec. There's
only one number on this card,
206
00:07:03,188 --> 00:07:04,887
and there's two of you.
207
00:07:04,956 --> 00:07:06,389
Oh.
208
00:07:06,424 --> 00:07:07,890
You think we're trying to pick you up,
209
00:07:07,926 --> 00:07:09,726
because we're at a bar
and we're telling you
210
00:07:09,761 --> 00:07:11,409
how handsome you are.
211
00:07:11,835 --> 00:07:13,296
Excuse me.
212
00:07:13,331 --> 00:07:14,664
You're hot, and you're about to make
213
00:07:14,699 --> 00:07:15,965
the easiest decision of your life.
214
00:07:16,000 --> 00:07:16,999
Not interested.
215
00:07:23,341 --> 00:07:25,274
Don't tell me. Only child, right?
216
00:07:25,310 --> 00:07:27,448
I guess now I am.
217
00:07:28,446 --> 00:07:30,182
As of yesterday.
218
00:07:32,283 --> 00:07:34,417
Sorry, did you... did you...
219
00:07:34,452 --> 00:07:36,387
It's loud. Did you hear what I, I said?
220
00:07:36,412 --> 00:07:37,736
I said you were hot.
221
00:07:37,761 --> 00:07:39,096
Um, have you ever
thought about modeling?
222
00:07:39,121 --> 00:07:41,124
Lady, you can't treat
me like a piece of meat.
223
00:07:41,159 --> 00:07:43,693
Now, I know I'm hot, but I
don't need your validation.
224
00:07:43,728 --> 00:07:45,484
We're trying to have a
serious conversation here
225
00:07:45,509 --> 00:07:47,263
about why the bees have disappeared.
226
00:07:49,834 --> 00:07:52,635
If a couple of guys in a bar
can't figure it out, who will?
227
00:08:04,649 --> 00:08:05,948
So, how'd you do?
228
00:08:05,984 --> 00:08:07,676
Got a couple irons in the fire, so...
229
00:08:07,701 --> 00:08:10,401
Me, too, me, too.
Planted a couple seeds,
230
00:08:10,426 --> 00:08:11,854
just waiting for the harvest.
231
00:08:11,890 --> 00:08:13,512
Hey! Hey, you.
232
00:08:13,537 --> 00:08:14,624
Stop what you're doing right now.
233
00:08:14,659 --> 00:08:15,792
What? I'm sorry.
234
00:08:15,827 --> 00:08:16,826
That's just how I walk.
235
00:08:16,861 --> 00:08:18,161
If I don't swing my arms,
236
00:08:18,196 --> 00:08:20,119
I start thinking I'm
standing, and I'll fall.
237
00:08:20,144 --> 00:08:21,586
Oh...
238
00:08:21,611 --> 00:08:23,666
Tell me, do you have
any modeling experience?
239
00:08:23,701 --> 00:08:26,235
I was trapped in a window display
in a department store once,
240
00:08:26,271 --> 00:08:27,670
and I was on the news a lot.
241
00:08:28,192 --> 00:08:31,067
Are we talking local or national news?
242
00:08:31,092 --> 00:08:32,508
Oh, that's a good question.
243
00:08:32,544 --> 00:08:34,293
Um...
244
00:08:36,245 --> 00:08:38,528
I think... sorry... what
my friend is trying to say
245
00:08:38,553 --> 00:08:41,217
is that it sounds like you
have on-camera experience,
246
00:08:41,252 --> 00:08:43,152
and if you would like,
we can hook you up
247
00:08:43,188 --> 00:08:45,847
with a top talent manager who
could get you an audition today.
248
00:08:45,872 --> 00:08:47,990
I do like hooking my
thumb into my belt loops,
249
00:08:48,026 --> 00:08:49,091
and pulling my pants down...
250
00:08:49,127 --> 00:08:50,593
Yeah. No. Don't do it now.
251
00:08:50,628 --> 00:08:52,032
But it is called "The Cowboy."
252
00:08:52,057 --> 00:08:54,096
And I can see it's not your first rodeo.
253
00:08:54,132 --> 00:08:56,666
Okay. Uh, your new
manager's name is Cece.
254
00:08:56,701 --> 00:08:58,125
Go to that address.
255
00:08:59,499 --> 00:09:01,438
Thanks. Okay.
256
00:09:04,258 --> 00:09:05,842
No, don't say it.
257
00:09:05,877 --> 00:09:06,946
- We're a team.
- No.
258
00:09:06,971 --> 00:09:08,244
I'm the bait, you're the hook.
259
00:09:08,271 --> 00:09:11,024
I don't think the bait usually
thinks of the hook as its teammate.
260
00:09:11,049 --> 00:09:13,008
That's such a hook thing to say.
261
00:09:13,033 --> 00:09:14,550
You're such a hook.
262
00:09:15,623 --> 00:09:17,092
You know...
263
00:09:17,117 --> 00:09:19,956
I've always wanted to
have a boys spa day.
264
00:09:22,035 --> 00:09:23,746
Nick, did you wear your
shirt during the massage?
265
00:09:23,771 --> 00:09:25,461
I did, but no bottoms.
266
00:09:25,496 --> 00:09:27,013
- It was liberating.
- Good for you.
267
00:09:27,038 --> 00:09:30,241
Check this out. These
cucumbers are gratis.
268
00:09:30,266 --> 00:09:31,670
I'm gonna make some pickles.
269
00:09:31,695 --> 00:09:33,769
If you're impressed by a
couple of free cucumbers,
270
00:09:33,805 --> 00:09:35,404
get ready to have your blind blown,
271
00:09:35,440 --> 00:09:37,358
'cause I signed us up
for the elite package.
272
00:09:37,383 --> 00:09:38,987
Does that mean the
pickle's already pickled?
273
00:09:39,020 --> 00:09:41,401
- Gentlemen, eucalyptus towels?
- Thank you.
274
00:09:41,426 --> 00:09:43,557
Oh, yeah... uh, mine's already wet!
275
00:09:43,582 --> 00:09:45,979
No, no, no, it's for
smelling, not drying.
276
00:09:46,004 --> 00:09:48,362
- Oh.
- Put it up to your face, smell it.
277
00:09:48,417 --> 00:09:50,820
Mmm. How could a smell
be both hot and cold
278
00:09:50,863 --> 00:09:52,208
at the same time, I ask.
279
00:09:52,233 --> 00:09:53,990
- It's nice.
- Ooh, this place is dope.
280
00:09:54,025 --> 00:09:55,645
Man, I feel very Roman.
281
00:09:55,670 --> 00:09:57,689
Boys, I think we found our ritual.
282
00:09:57,714 --> 00:09:59,328
Yeah, we did.
283
00:09:59,364 --> 00:10:02,414
If you gentlemen are ready, I
can take you to your Brazilians.
284
00:10:02,439 --> 00:10:04,333
Sounds very fun.
285
00:10:04,369 --> 00:10:06,769
- I'm in a relationship, myself.
- Yeah.
286
00:10:06,804 --> 00:10:08,170
Uh, but I would love to look.
287
00:10:08,206 --> 00:10:09,499
Just point me to the door, please.
288
00:10:09,524 --> 00:10:11,530
Sir. The elite package at S'Pa
289
00:10:11,555 --> 00:10:14,929
includes the wax removal of
hair from your nether regions.
290
00:10:18,733 --> 00:10:20,018
What did you say, homeboy?
291
00:10:20,043 --> 00:10:21,744
Scrotum wax.
292
00:10:25,821 --> 00:10:27,354
No, Schmidt.
293
00:10:28,002 --> 00:10:30,359
- Say something.
- Say something to him.
294
00:10:32,666 --> 00:10:33,696
Donovan.
295
00:10:33,731 --> 00:10:35,031
I have some very good news.
296
00:10:35,066 --> 00:10:37,534
I have a brand-new client
297
00:10:37,559 --> 00:10:39,534
that I am very excited for you to meet.
298
00:10:39,559 --> 00:10:42,062
- I'm Dean and I'm a model.
- Mm-hmm.
299
00:10:43,108 --> 00:10:44,508
But I'm a model.
300
00:10:44,533 --> 00:10:45,780
- No. I'm a model.
- Yeah, both models.
301
00:10:45,805 --> 00:10:48,195
- No. I'm a model.
- No. I-I am a model.
302
00:10:48,220 --> 00:10:49,968
I am... I'm the model.
303
00:10:49,993 --> 00:10:51,847
- But, like, I'm, but I model.
- I'm a model.
304
00:10:51,872 --> 00:10:52,667
- I model.
- You...
305
00:10:52,692 --> 00:10:54,206
- I'm a model.
- I just told... I'm a model.
306
00:10:54,231 --> 00:10:55,885
- Astro Fuel.
- I model.
307
00:10:55,920 --> 00:10:57,720
What the heck is going on?
308
00:10:57,755 --> 00:11:00,065
Well, Cece's Boys is growing,
309
00:11:00,090 --> 00:11:02,026
so I'm just gonna help
Dean make a résumé
310
00:11:02,051 --> 00:11:03,793
for the big audition
we're all gonna go on.
311
00:11:03,828 --> 00:11:05,627
- What about my résumé?
- You already have a résumé.
312
00:11:05,652 --> 00:11:07,666
Well, I-I-I want another one.
313
00:11:07,691 --> 00:11:09,497
- And another sandwich.
- I want a sandwich, too.
314
00:11:09,522 --> 00:11:10,824
Stop copying me!
315
00:11:10,849 --> 00:11:13,369
Donovan. Dean.
316
00:11:16,319 --> 00:11:18,319
Um...
317
00:11:18,344 --> 00:11:19,742
Hmm.
318
00:11:21,528 --> 00:11:22,542
No...
319
00:11:22,567 --> 00:11:23,964
The line between what we're doing
320
00:11:23,989 --> 00:11:26,300
and being creepy is so thin.
321
00:11:26,351 --> 00:11:27,662
Hey, Cece, what's up?
322
00:11:27,687 --> 00:11:29,151
Any luck? The audition's in an hour,
323
00:11:29,187 --> 00:11:30,353
I'm getting kind of panicky.
324
00:11:30,388 --> 00:11:31,921
Yeah. Totally. Um...
325
00:11:31,956 --> 00:11:35,123
we're just looking for that perfect
Cece's Boys type, you know...
326
00:11:35,524 --> 00:11:36,618
- perfect.
- Ow!
327
00:11:36,643 --> 00:11:38,507
I don't know hair this
short can get so tangled!
328
00:11:38,532 --> 00:11:39,547
- Okay?
- You're hurting me.
329
00:11:39,572 --> 00:11:40,742
- I'm very sorry.
- Cece, I don't know
330
00:11:40,766 --> 00:11:42,065
how many buttons to do on my shirt.
331
00:11:42,101 --> 00:11:43,233
Donovan, please.
332
00:11:43,268 --> 00:11:44,730
Look, Jess.
333
00:11:45,704 --> 00:11:47,237
If you haven't found anyone by now,
334
00:11:47,272 --> 00:11:49,373
maybe I should just cut my losses.
335
00:11:49,542 --> 00:11:51,108
Maybe I should just tell them I only...
336
00:11:51,143 --> 00:11:53,076
No, no, no, no, no. We actually, um...
337
00:11:53,103 --> 00:11:54,769
we have two guys, we'll...
338
00:11:54,813 --> 00:11:57,114
- You do? Oh!
- ... bring them right over.
339
00:11:57,149 --> 00:11:59,016
You are the best. Thank you!
340
00:11:59,996 --> 00:12:00,968
I'm sorry?
341
00:12:02,593 --> 00:12:03,720
I'm gonna be honest.
342
00:12:03,756 --> 00:12:05,422
I don't know what I'm looking for.
343
00:12:05,457 --> 00:12:08,064
Oh, it-it's the other one.
344
00:12:08,134 --> 00:12:09,978
- No.
- They have a real look.
345
00:12:10,003 --> 00:12:11,228
What look would that be?
346
00:12:11,263 --> 00:12:12,629
I own my own dog-walking company?
347
00:12:12,664 --> 00:12:13,964
Branding!
348
00:12:13,999 --> 00:12:14,965
You're good.
349
00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:16,800
You know what? I believe in them.
350
00:12:16,835 --> 00:12:19,703
And we also have no other choice.
351
00:12:19,738 --> 00:12:21,203
So let's get them camera-ready.
352
00:12:21,228 --> 00:12:22,805
How far away is that camera gonna be?
353
00:12:29,046 --> 00:12:31,313
Okay, guys, let's go... Oh, hey, Kirby.
354
00:12:31,349 --> 00:12:32,848
Looking good.
355
00:12:32,884 --> 00:12:34,029
That is for cats.
356
00:12:34,054 --> 00:12:35,834
But it's okay. Put this on.
357
00:12:35,859 --> 00:12:37,568
They're from my
roommate's earthquake kit.
358
00:12:37,631 --> 00:12:39,097
He has a three-week supply.
359
00:12:39,133 --> 00:12:41,231
Bruce. Put this on.
They won't recognize you
360
00:12:41,256 --> 00:12:43,068
on your next volunteer
shift at the hospital.
361
00:12:43,103 --> 00:12:44,882
Ah. Jess.
362
00:12:44,907 --> 00:12:46,288
Hallway.
363
00:12:46,874 --> 00:12:49,333
Okay, are you absolutely sure
364
00:12:49,358 --> 00:12:50,575
that this is the way to go?
365
00:12:50,611 --> 00:12:54,246
Can't we get our hands on,
like, a water polo team?
366
00:12:54,271 --> 00:12:56,415
Or hire escorts?
367
00:12:56,450 --> 00:12:58,443
Or call in a bomb
threat to the audition.
368
00:12:58,468 --> 00:13:00,052
In this political environment?
369
00:13:00,087 --> 00:13:01,586
Oh, I'm nervous even saying it.
370
00:13:01,622 --> 00:13:03,155
- What about nothing?
- No!
371
00:13:03,190 --> 00:13:06,391
Is nothing maybe the right
thing to do in this situation?
372
00:13:06,427 --> 00:13:08,894
We can't bail on Cece. This is her shot.
373
00:13:08,919 --> 00:13:10,362
We can't let her become irrelevant
374
00:13:10,397 --> 00:13:12,931
like chunky belts, or quoting Borat.
375
00:13:12,974 --> 00:13:14,676
Okay. Well, if I have
to go down with the ship,
376
00:13:14,701 --> 00:13:15,840
I'm not going down without a fight.
377
00:13:15,865 --> 00:13:17,803
And those two are gonna need a lot more
378
00:13:17,838 --> 00:13:19,481
than hair gel and V-necks.
379
00:13:19,506 --> 00:13:21,472
They're gonna need motorcycle boots,
380
00:13:21,508 --> 00:13:24,075
scarves, knit caps,
381
00:13:24,110 --> 00:13:26,644
and all the eye makeup
that Schmidt's got.
382
00:13:26,679 --> 00:13:28,446
Cece?
383
00:13:28,934 --> 00:13:30,467
Hello?
384
00:13:31,518 --> 00:13:32,817
Cece?
385
00:13:34,222 --> 00:13:35,345
What are you doing in here?
386
00:13:35,370 --> 00:13:36,921
Donovan told me to wait
here in your break room
387
00:13:36,956 --> 00:13:38,142
- and then he left.
- What?!
388
00:13:38,167 --> 00:13:40,406
And I couldn't open the
door and it was really dark.
389
00:13:40,431 --> 00:13:42,660
Donovan, get in here right now!
390
00:13:43,672 --> 00:13:45,938
Donovan, we have an audition in an hour
391
00:13:45,963 --> 00:13:47,594
and you lock Dean in a closet?
392
00:13:47,619 --> 00:13:49,433
Well, you said I was
your number one client.
393
00:13:49,461 --> 00:13:50,619
Okay. No. Wait, Donovan.
394
00:13:50,652 --> 00:13:52,298
- I'm out of here.
- Just calm down. Wait.
395
00:13:53,640 --> 00:13:56,140
I went the wrong way. Don't look.
396
00:13:56,505 --> 00:13:57,685
So, what are we thinking?
397
00:13:57,710 --> 00:13:59,510
I don't know. Maybe they give
you something to bite down on.
398
00:13:59,546 --> 00:14:00,732
No, I'm talking about leaving!
399
00:14:00,757 --> 00:14:01,953
You're being so dramatic right now.
400
00:14:01,978 --> 00:14:02,989
I don't think I'm being dramatic.
401
00:14:03,014 --> 00:14:04,881
Look, I'll say it now without any drama.
402
00:14:05,174 --> 00:14:08,530
I don't want the hairs ripped
off my testicles by a stranger.
403
00:14:08,555 --> 00:14:09,780
I think they're there for a reason.
404
00:14:09,805 --> 00:14:11,522
They are trained professionals in there.
405
00:14:11,558 --> 00:14:14,316
This isn't gonna be some
back-alley sack waxing.
406
00:14:14,341 --> 00:14:15,707
They have those?
407
00:14:15,732 --> 00:14:17,999
I'm sure they do, but
this isn't one of them.
408
00:14:18,024 --> 00:14:19,430
Who would go to that one?
409
00:14:19,465 --> 00:14:21,687
Well, sometimes, in an emergency,
410
00:14:21,712 --> 00:14:23,119
you got to do what you got to do.
411
00:14:23,144 --> 00:14:24,595
What would the emergency ever be?
412
00:14:24,620 --> 00:14:27,048
Nick, this is gonna be like
cottage cheese all over again.
413
00:14:27,073 --> 00:14:28,839
At first, you're gonna
be kicking and screaming,
414
00:14:28,875 --> 00:14:30,007
saying that you don't want to try it,
415
00:14:30,043 --> 00:14:31,557
but I'm telling you, in the end,
416
00:14:31,612 --> 00:14:33,645
you're gonna tell everybody that
you meet how much you loved it.
417
00:14:33,681 --> 00:14:35,924
- This is nothing like cottage cheese.
- Exactly like cottage cheese.
418
00:14:35,949 --> 00:14:38,516
Guys, I have off-the-charts
follicle strength, okay?
419
00:14:38,556 --> 00:14:41,397
It'll be a blood bath down
there, a real crime scene,
420
00:14:41,422 --> 00:14:42,454
so I'm leaning, "No."
421
00:14:42,490 --> 00:14:44,156
I'm out! Like my mother says
422
00:14:44,191 --> 00:14:45,788
at every party she goes to,
423
00:14:45,813 --> 00:14:48,617
"No one touches my purse."
424
00:14:48,642 --> 00:14:50,702
- Good day.
- Wait. Sit. Sit down.
425
00:14:50,727 --> 00:14:52,423
You guys don't need to leave.
426
00:14:52,448 --> 00:14:55,102
Just a minute ago, you were saying
how much you love this place.
427
00:14:55,127 --> 00:14:57,626
Just don't get your sack waxed.
428
00:14:57,651 --> 00:14:59,922
Okay, I don't care how big the park is.
429
00:14:59,947 --> 00:15:01,914
If there is a loose bear in it,
430
00:15:01,939 --> 00:15:03,539
I'm not going in the park!
431
00:15:03,564 --> 00:15:05,274
I'm never going in that park again!
432
00:15:05,299 --> 00:15:07,212
- I'm never going in again!
- But this is our ritual!
433
00:15:07,243 --> 00:15:08,175
Schmidt, we'll just find a new one.
434
00:15:08,244 --> 00:15:09,310
Easy for you to say.
435
00:15:09,345 --> 00:15:12,012
You two guys are still gonna
be living together in the loft,
436
00:15:12,048 --> 00:15:13,781
saying, "Oh, oh, I'm sorry.
437
00:15:13,816 --> 00:15:15,783
"I didn't know you were
in here in the bathroom."
438
00:15:15,818 --> 00:15:18,787
And coming up with clever
names for the Wi-Fi network
439
00:15:18,812 --> 00:15:21,057
- like, "This Is 4D."
- That's pretty good.
440
00:15:21,082 --> 00:15:23,290
I'd say we just... let's agree
right now to switch it to that.
441
00:15:23,326 --> 00:15:25,092
Points is, is your
lives are going to go on,
442
00:15:25,127 --> 00:15:28,697
and I'll just always be that
weirdo you once lived with.
443
00:15:31,941 --> 00:15:33,707
So you know what?
444
00:15:33,990 --> 00:15:37,340
I am gonna get my sack waxed.
445
00:15:37,365 --> 00:15:39,611
So enjoy the rest of
your lives together.
446
00:15:39,636 --> 00:15:41,436
I'm gonna go shuck this corn.
447
00:15:42,378 --> 00:15:44,278
Oh, man.
448
00:15:44,347 --> 00:15:46,600
Hey, do you think they'll
take a picture of him
449
00:15:46,625 --> 00:15:48,694
just as they rip like
they do on roller coasters?
450
00:15:48,719 --> 00:15:51,051
I think you missed the
point of what just happened.
451
00:15:59,295 --> 00:16:00,461
Did you just see that?
452
00:16:00,496 --> 00:16:01,479
No. I had my eyes closed.
453
00:16:01,504 --> 00:16:02,997
I was saying a non-denominational prayer
454
00:16:03,032 --> 00:16:04,398
for Bruce and Kirby. What did I miss?
455
00:16:04,433 --> 00:16:07,204
That woman just checked out our guys.
456
00:16:07,229 --> 00:16:10,635
Like, she-she really checked them out.
457
00:16:10,660 --> 00:16:12,675
Maybe we have a chance. I don't know.
458
00:16:12,714 --> 00:16:14,347
- Did you hear what you just said?
- What?
459
00:16:14,382 --> 00:16:15,875
You said, "Our guys."
460
00:16:15,962 --> 00:16:18,421
- Okay, let's just go in.
- Our guys!
461
00:16:18,457 --> 00:16:20,423
- Don't get sentimental.
- Our guys.
462
00:16:20,459 --> 00:16:21,825
Oh, you get off of me.
463
00:16:21,860 --> 00:16:23,226
Our guys!
464
00:16:37,792 --> 00:16:39,166
Jess, I asked for models,
465
00:16:39,191 --> 00:16:41,767
not a couple of driver's ed instructors!
466
00:16:41,792 --> 00:16:44,422
I know, Cece, but
they're hot on the inside.
467
00:16:44,447 --> 00:16:47,151
Bruce teaches CPR to children
with irregular mouths,
468
00:16:47,176 --> 00:16:50,090
and Kirby has given so much bone
marrow, they told him to stop.
469
00:16:50,115 --> 00:16:51,945
I don't know how that's gonna help them
470
00:16:51,981 --> 00:16:53,447
at a print ad audition.
471
00:16:53,482 --> 00:16:54,948
You're right, she's right.
472
00:16:54,984 --> 00:16:56,699
I don't know what we were thinking.
473
00:16:56,724 --> 00:16:58,552
Let's go put these dogs down.
474
00:16:58,587 --> 00:17:00,324
Why did we even give them names?
475
00:17:00,349 --> 00:17:01,455
They came with names.
476
00:17:01,490 --> 00:17:02,723
Right, I guess what I meant
477
00:17:02,758 --> 00:17:04,988
is why did we bothering learning them.
478
00:17:07,208 --> 00:17:10,727
Guys, uh, there's been a little hiccup.
479
00:17:10,833 --> 00:17:13,333
- We're allowed to eat all these, right?
- I just love them.
480
00:17:13,369 --> 00:17:16,965
Yeah, you guys can keep eating. Um,
481
00:17:16,990 --> 00:17:19,357
so, there's no way to sugarcoat this,
482
00:17:19,382 --> 00:17:20,507
but the truth is...
483
00:17:22,037 --> 00:17:23,076
Wait, wait, wait...
484
00:17:23,112 --> 00:17:24,945
- So gross, right?
- Ooh, nasty!
485
00:17:24,980 --> 00:17:28,176
Cece? Cece, come here.
486
00:17:28,598 --> 00:17:30,731
- What?
- Look around this room.
487
00:17:31,555 --> 00:17:34,132
Nobody's eating these things but them.
488
00:17:35,564 --> 00:17:36,896
Oh, my God, yes!
489
00:17:36,928 --> 00:17:38,154
And they love them.
490
00:17:38,179 --> 00:17:39,526
It almost makes me want to try them.
491
00:17:39,561 --> 00:17:42,162
And I emphasize "almost."
492
00:17:42,197 --> 00:17:44,209
They're making a mistake.
493
00:17:46,285 --> 00:17:50,100
These are the guys that
can sell this stuff.
494
00:17:50,170 --> 00:17:51,705
Not these guys.
495
00:17:51,740 --> 00:17:53,982
But they've already decided
on the direction of the ad.
496
00:17:54,007 --> 00:17:55,802
So tell them to change it!
497
00:17:55,827 --> 00:17:58,227
I mean, what have you got to lose?
498
00:18:05,648 --> 00:18:07,054
Hey, Joy.
499
00:18:07,977 --> 00:18:09,155
I'm scared.
500
00:18:09,180 --> 00:18:11,225
- Don't you be scared, kid!
- Nick?
501
00:18:11,250 --> 00:18:13,283
- We're here with you, buddy!
- Winston!
502
00:18:13,308 --> 00:18:15,128
We don't need a ritual, Schmidt,
503
00:18:15,164 --> 00:18:17,306
'cause you're not gonna lose us.
504
00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:19,041
I thought we could've
just told you that,
505
00:18:19,066 --> 00:18:21,325
but Winston thought
we needed to show it.
506
00:18:21,350 --> 00:18:22,769
Yeah, I thought that would be better.
507
00:18:22,805 --> 00:18:25,038
You know, it makes more sense to me.
508
00:18:25,074 --> 00:18:26,903
- Band of brothers.
- Band of brothers!
509
00:18:26,928 --> 00:18:28,793
That's right, man.
Band of brothers, bro.
510
00:18:28,818 --> 00:18:30,129
Band of brothers.
511
00:18:32,027 --> 00:18:34,915
You know, I've been a little bit
curious about it this whole time.
512
00:18:34,950 --> 00:18:36,246
I just couldn't admit
it to you guys, you know?
513
00:18:36,271 --> 00:18:37,605
I think this would be more dignified
514
00:18:37,630 --> 00:18:38,762
if we did it in silence.
515
00:18:38,787 --> 00:18:39,957
- Of course.
- Yeah, let's do this in silence.
516
00:18:39,982 --> 00:18:42,003
- Good luck, guys.
- I'm ready for you, lady.
517
00:18:42,028 --> 00:18:44,558
Three friends going on
the same silent journey,
518
00:18:44,593 --> 00:18:46,393
together, yet separate,
519
00:18:46,428 --> 00:18:48,559
alone, yet closer than ever.
520
00:18:49,998 --> 00:18:51,732
- Nick?
- I'm all right!
521
00:18:53,317 --> 00:18:54,848
- Winston?
- Can you hear me, Schmidt?!
522
00:18:54,873 --> 00:18:56,670
You hang in there, you son of a...
523
00:18:56,705 --> 00:18:58,638
Aah! This woman's ripping it off!
524
00:19:03,994 --> 00:19:06,508
Ooh! That's actually kind of warm. Ouch!
525
00:19:06,533 --> 00:19:08,014
No! Okay, time out, time
out, time out, time out,
526
00:19:08,050 --> 00:19:09,776
time out, time out, time
out, time out, time out!
527
00:19:19,194 --> 00:19:20,660
No, no, no! No!
528
00:19:33,308 --> 00:19:34,608
Oh!
529
00:19:40,421 --> 00:19:42,702
How many times do you freakin' do it?!
530
00:19:44,052 --> 00:19:46,763
Okay, good. You both are here.
531
00:19:46,788 --> 00:19:49,122
So, guess who got the
Sausage Crunchies job.
532
00:19:49,158 --> 00:19:51,152
- Oh, yay, Kirby!
- Hey, Kirby!
533
00:19:51,177 --> 00:19:53,322
Not Kirby, but I am
going to hang on to him.
534
00:19:53,347 --> 00:19:56,563
I think he could book ads for both
fast food and anti-depressants.
535
00:19:56,598 --> 00:19:58,097
- Ah.
- Bruce?
536
00:19:58,122 --> 00:19:59,132
They absolutely hated Bruce.
537
00:19:59,168 --> 00:20:01,142
He got sick during the audition.
538
00:20:01,167 --> 00:20:03,431
- Sausage Crunchies everywhere.
- That's a lot.
539
00:20:03,456 --> 00:20:06,032
But they loved Dean!
540
00:20:06,057 --> 00:20:07,173
Mm.
541
00:20:07,198 --> 00:20:08,964
Oh, it's nice to see the good guys win.
542
00:20:08,989 --> 00:20:12,746
Right?! They said I brought them
the best and the worst of the day,
543
00:20:12,781 --> 00:20:15,346
so... maybe that's my thing.
544
00:20:15,371 --> 00:20:16,339
Hmm.
545
00:20:16,364 --> 00:20:19,019
Can I throw out this, uh,
soggy bag of cucumbers?
546
00:20:19,054 --> 00:20:20,187
No!
547
00:20:20,222 --> 00:20:21,656
Those are pickles in progress.
548
00:20:22,870 --> 00:20:24,259
Um, I don't mean to be mean,
549
00:20:24,284 --> 00:20:26,399
but you guys are being real
babies about this whole thing.
550
00:20:26,454 --> 00:20:27,761
They don't...
551
00:20:27,796 --> 00:20:29,596
Until you've had your sack waxed,
552
00:20:29,631 --> 00:20:30,831
you can't know this pain.
553
00:20:30,866 --> 00:20:32,060
- Excuse me?
- Childbirth?
554
00:20:32,085 --> 00:20:33,210
Weekly wax, top to tail.
555
00:20:33,235 --> 00:20:35,068
We went through hell,
556
00:20:35,100 --> 00:20:37,742
and we came out the
other side, gentlemen.
557
00:20:37,812 --> 00:20:38,872
It was war.
558
00:20:38,907 --> 00:20:41,625
Granted, one that took
place in a high end-spa,
559
00:20:41,650 --> 00:20:43,744
but still our war.
560
00:20:43,779 --> 00:20:44,890
That's right.
561
00:20:44,915 --> 00:20:46,379
I mean, this not something
we do every week, right?
562
00:20:46,406 --> 00:20:47,726
- No, it's like a monthly thing.
- Monthly?
563
00:20:47,751 --> 00:20:49,132
- Not a chance!
- It's our ritual.
564
00:20:49,158 --> 00:20:50,929
No. No, no, no, no. One time only.
565
00:20:50,954 --> 00:20:53,351
Guys, how can it be a ritual
if we only do it one time?
566
00:20:53,376 --> 00:20:56,110
Shut up, Schmidt! I will never go back!
567
00:21:02,330 --> 00:21:04,698
It's okay, man. We're
gonna get metal detectors.
568
00:21:04,723 --> 00:21:06,995
Synced and corrected by Aaronnmb
www.addic7ed.com