1 00:00:02,815 --> 00:00:04,949 Guess what! I got balloons. 2 00:00:04,966 --> 00:00:06,901 From a guy in a van. 3 00:00:06,968 --> 00:00:08,036 I love this neighborhood. 4 00:00:08,103 --> 00:00:09,287 I just love it. 5 00:00:09,354 --> 00:00:11,355 Oh, what does that...? "Me so horny." Very good. 6 00:00:11,423 --> 00:00:14,192 "No credit, no problem!" And "Happy 100th, Jane!" 7 00:00:14,260 --> 00:00:16,093 I don't think she made it, but she lived a good life. 8 00:00:16,161 --> 00:00:17,895 Shut up! 9 00:00:17,962 --> 00:00:19,296 Who booby-trapped me? 10 00:00:19,363 --> 00:00:21,265 Stop! Shut up! 11 00:00:21,332 --> 00:00:23,233 It's my mom. 12 00:00:23,801 --> 00:00:26,536 Get off of me! 13 00:00:26,604 --> 00:00:28,705 - Yeah, Mom, hey. - Nick's just mad 14 00:00:28,773 --> 00:00:30,207 'cause that punk-ass balloon beat his ass. 15 00:00:30,275 --> 00:00:31,475 Hey, no huffing. Come on, guys. 16 00:00:31,508 --> 00:00:33,209 Take these seriously, Winston. 17 00:00:33,277 --> 00:00:37,313 I didn't buy the balloons to have you guys... 18 00:00:37,880 --> 00:00:41,117 If you do that one more time, I'm gonna break your faces in. 19 00:00:47,123 --> 00:00:48,957 Uh, my dad died. 20 00:00:51,660 --> 00:00:53,428 Yeah, I guess he had a heart attack. 21 00:00:53,495 --> 00:00:55,931 I got to go back to, uh, Chicago 22 00:00:55,998 --> 00:00:58,934 and, uh, go to the funeral and everything. 23 00:01:02,238 --> 00:01:04,205 Well, are you guys gonna say anything or... 24 00:01:06,272 --> 00:01:08,675 - That's terrible, Nick. - Wow, we're so sorry. 25 00:01:08,743 --> 00:01:10,110 If there's anything we can do, please. 26 00:01:10,178 --> 00:01:11,111 Come here. Not Walt. Just... 27 00:01:11,179 --> 00:01:12,100 - Give me a hug. - Nick. 28 00:01:12,480 --> 00:01:13,780 We love you. 29 00:01:13,848 --> 00:01:14,815 Love you, Nick. 30 00:01:14,882 --> 00:01:16,317 Stay strong. 31 00:01:16,318 --> 00:01:22,158 Sync & corrections by Alice www.addic7ed.com 32 00:01:16,384 --> 00:01:18,885 ♪ Who's that girl? ♪ ♪ Who's that girl? ♪ 33 00:01:18,953 --> 00:01:20,619 ♪ Who's that girl? ♪ 34 00:01:20,687 --> 00:01:22,048 ♪ Who's that girl? ♪ ♪ It's Jess. ♪ 35 00:01:25,359 --> 00:01:28,294 So this is where Nick Miller grew up. 36 00:01:28,362 --> 00:01:30,830 Well, except for the fall of '88 to spring of '89. 37 00:01:30,898 --> 00:01:32,765 That was our van year. 38 00:01:32,833 --> 00:01:34,100 I just want you to know 39 00:01:34,168 --> 00:01:36,268 - I am here for you. - Okay. 40 00:01:36,336 --> 00:01:37,402 I'm gonna be strong for you, man. 41 00:01:37,470 --> 00:01:39,004 You know, I really did love Walt. 42 00:01:39,072 --> 00:01:40,605 He was my dad, Winston. 43 00:01:40,673 --> 00:01:42,440 Yeah, but, I mean, he loved me more than he loved you. 44 00:01:42,508 --> 00:01:44,442 - He told me that. - Yeah, he told me that, too, actually. 45 00:01:44,510 --> 00:01:46,011 Sorry. 46 00:01:46,079 --> 00:01:47,179 - You okay, Schmidt? - I didn't want 47 00:01:47,247 --> 00:01:48,446 to make this about me, but... 48 00:01:48,514 --> 00:01:49,948 the airline lost my bag. 49 00:01:50,016 --> 00:01:51,382 I wanted to look fantastic 50 00:01:51,449 --> 00:01:53,251 for your father's funeral. 51 00:01:53,318 --> 00:01:55,286 Now I have nothing but the schmatta on my back. 52 00:01:55,354 --> 00:01:58,489 All right. Let's do this. 53 00:01:58,556 --> 00:02:00,124 Uh, Jess, we should warn you. 54 00:02:00,192 --> 00:02:02,659 Nick's family-- a little crazy. 55 00:02:02,727 --> 00:02:04,395 - It's called pop! - Just call it soda. 56 00:02:04,462 --> 00:02:05,696 - It's soda, all right? - It's not! It's not! 57 00:02:05,764 --> 00:02:06,997 Hey, Uncle Nicky. Hey, man. 58 00:02:07,064 --> 00:02:08,544 - No, it's called soda. - It's called pop! 59 00:02:08,565 --> 00:02:09,926 It's called soda. It's called soda. 60 00:02:09,934 --> 00:02:11,234 Why would you call it soda if it's pop? 61 00:02:11,302 --> 00:02:12,635 - You call your dad pop! - Hey. 62 00:02:12,703 --> 00:02:13,937 - It's Nick. - Hey. Nickels. 63 00:02:14,005 --> 00:02:15,405 My brother Nick's back, guys. 64 00:02:15,472 --> 00:02:17,207 - My condolences, all right? - Hey, thanks for making it out. 65 00:02:17,275 --> 00:02:18,841 Sorry about that. Your brother's being a douche. 66 00:02:18,910 --> 00:02:20,630 Yeah. I'm not being a douche! I'm emotional! 67 00:02:20,644 --> 00:02:22,205 - Oh, God... - You've been a douche all day. 68 00:02:22,246 --> 00:02:23,645 - I mean, why? - I know. I know. 69 00:02:23,713 --> 00:02:25,680 You been... you been crying a bunch, buddy? 70 00:02:25,748 --> 00:02:27,349 - No. - He'll get your shoulder all wet, too. 71 00:02:27,384 --> 00:02:29,618 Hey, look, don't do the hair-pull. It's so intimate. 72 00:02:29,685 --> 00:02:31,053 - You okay? - I'm not okay! 73 00:02:31,121 --> 00:02:33,289 Jamie, here's what I need you to do: Grab a bunch of kids 74 00:02:33,356 --> 00:02:35,224 and teach them how to build a snowman outside. 75 00:02:35,292 --> 00:02:37,159 I can't do that! I already did it already! 76 00:02:37,227 --> 00:02:39,160 - He put the carrot in the crotch. - Why'd you put the carrot in the crotch? 77 00:02:39,228 --> 00:02:40,761 - 'Cause they told me to! - They're kids. 78 00:02:40,829 --> 00:02:42,563 Those kids are cool! I wanted to hang out! 79 00:02:42,631 --> 00:02:43,864 Don't trust cops. 80 00:02:43,933 --> 00:02:45,333 Nicky! 81 00:02:45,401 --> 00:02:47,868 - Hey, Ma. - Oh. 82 00:02:47,937 --> 00:02:50,405 Oh. I miss him, Nicky. 83 00:02:50,472 --> 00:02:53,341 - Yeah, I know, Ma. - That bastard was a saint. 84 00:02:53,409 --> 00:02:54,642 A saint. 85 00:02:54,709 --> 00:02:55,708 The bastard. 86 00:02:55,776 --> 00:02:57,344 I know. Come here. Hey. 87 00:02:57,412 --> 00:02:58,711 This is getting very personal. May... 88 00:02:58,779 --> 00:03:00,513 Maybe none of us should go to the funeral. 89 00:03:00,581 --> 00:03:03,350 The early buzz on this thing is that it's gonna be a real drag. 90 00:03:03,418 --> 00:03:06,286 - So what still needs to get done? - We need to, uh, get the groceries, 91 00:03:06,354 --> 00:03:09,256 - uh, plan the funeral, call the paper... - Whoa, whoa, whoa. 92 00:03:09,324 --> 00:03:10,890 Did you say "plan the funeral"? 93 00:03:10,958 --> 00:03:12,425 That's why you're here, Nicky. 94 00:03:12,492 --> 00:03:14,160 You take care of everything. 95 00:03:14,227 --> 00:03:17,629 - I got the napkins! - Oh, that's so hot. 96 00:03:17,697 --> 00:03:20,199 - Great, Jamie. - Is Nick taking care of people? 97 00:03:20,267 --> 00:03:22,101 Yeah, with Pop-Pop coming and going, Nick had to step up 98 00:03:22,169 --> 00:03:23,535 and be the man of the family. 99 00:03:23,603 --> 00:03:25,083 Pretty much takes care of all of them. 100 00:03:25,105 --> 00:03:27,439 Don't laugh when they call him responsible. 101 00:03:27,506 --> 00:03:29,441 They don't know why that's hilarious. 102 00:03:29,508 --> 00:03:32,743 Um... Oh... Hi, Mrs. Miller. 103 00:03:32,811 --> 00:03:34,779 I'm so sorry for your loss. 104 00:03:34,847 --> 00:03:37,182 - If there's anything I can do to help, I... - Who are you? 105 00:03:37,249 --> 00:03:39,817 - Oh, I'm sorry. I'm Jess. - This is Jess, my new roommate. 106 00:03:39,885 --> 00:03:41,519 - Um, so nice to meet you. - I've told you about her. 107 00:03:41,587 --> 00:03:43,820 Winnie and Fat Schmidt I know. Hey, boys. 108 00:03:43,888 --> 00:03:44,888 I just wanted to say that 109 00:03:44,889 --> 00:03:46,390 I'm here and happy 110 00:03:46,458 --> 00:03:49,159 - to do anything. - Is she a Spanish? 111 00:03:49,227 --> 00:03:51,962 Um... I'm from Portland, Oregon. 112 00:03:52,030 --> 00:03:53,897 Land of books. 113 00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:58,802 Trailblazers. 114 00:03:58,870 --> 00:04:00,036 Hmm. 115 00:04:01,405 --> 00:04:03,706 Are you guys, uh... 116 00:04:03,773 --> 00:04:06,133 - Jamie, I'm begging you to shut up. - Your father always wanted 117 00:04:06,176 --> 00:04:07,656 to have a funeral just like Elvis had, 118 00:04:07,711 --> 00:04:09,712 so that's what we're gonna give him. 119 00:04:09,779 --> 00:04:11,814 - A funeral like Elvis had? - That means... 120 00:04:11,882 --> 00:04:15,183 12 white limos and an Elvis impersonator... 121 00:04:15,251 --> 00:04:16,151 Dad's gonna get the funeral 122 00:04:16,219 --> 00:04:17,519 you want him to have, okay? 123 00:04:17,586 --> 00:04:18,920 So tell me what needs to get done, 124 00:04:18,988 --> 00:04:20,155 and I'll just do it. 125 00:04:20,223 --> 00:04:22,357 Oh, the eulogy. 126 00:04:23,425 --> 00:04:24,126 You... 127 00:04:24,193 --> 00:04:25,327 - you'll do the eulogy, right? - Oh... 128 00:04:25,395 --> 00:04:27,595 I don't think I should do it. 129 00:04:27,663 --> 00:04:29,597 You just say a bunch of nice stuff all in a row. 130 00:04:29,665 --> 00:04:31,198 - Do it, College. You got it. - Nick, you have to. 131 00:04:31,266 --> 00:04:32,866 - You should do it. - Come on, Nicky. 132 00:04:32,934 --> 00:04:34,235 You should do it. Do a good poem. Do one of your good ones. 133 00:04:34,302 --> 00:04:36,103 Come on, man. You got to. 134 00:04:36,671 --> 00:04:38,471 Yeah, okay. Sure. I'll, uh... 135 00:04:38,540 --> 00:04:40,774 That's my boy. 136 00:04:40,842 --> 00:04:43,410 He takes care of everything. 137 00:04:51,752 --> 00:04:53,354 - Hey. - Hey, Jess. 138 00:04:53,422 --> 00:04:54,902 It's like a whole secret life for you. 139 00:04:55,323 --> 00:04:57,124 You're not even looking at the numbers. 140 00:04:57,192 --> 00:04:59,293 Aunt Ruthie used to call this the Iron Jew. 141 00:04:59,361 --> 00:05:00,628 Wow. 142 00:05:01,696 --> 00:05:03,128 Are you having time to process this? 143 00:05:03,196 --> 00:05:04,863 Yeah, I'm just trying to figure out 144 00:05:04,931 --> 00:05:06,732 the level of Elvis impersonator we can afford. 145 00:05:06,799 --> 00:05:07,367 Uh-huh. 146 00:05:07,435 --> 00:05:09,369 And I think a white one's out of reach. 147 00:05:09,437 --> 00:05:11,003 Is there anything I could do to help? 148 00:05:11,571 --> 00:05:13,406 - The eulogy. - Sorry? 149 00:05:13,474 --> 00:05:16,476 Oh, that would be really helpful 'cause that's been getting in my way a little bit. 150 00:05:16,544 --> 00:05:18,444 I didn't really know your dad except... 151 00:05:18,511 --> 00:05:21,447 the one hour that I committed fraud with him. 152 00:05:21,514 --> 00:05:22,914 That's all there is to know, really. 153 00:05:22,949 --> 00:05:24,149 I think that's, you know, one task 154 00:05:24,217 --> 00:05:25,917 I think maybe is better if you... 155 00:05:25,985 --> 00:05:27,919 Look, I've got to figure out an Elvis theme. 156 00:05:27,987 --> 00:05:30,856 You know, Elvis-themed flowers and food and music all in a day. 157 00:05:30,923 --> 00:05:32,391 I just... You asked if there was anything 158 00:05:32,459 --> 00:05:34,459 you could do, and there is. 159 00:05:35,726 --> 00:05:36,394 Okay. 160 00:05:36,462 --> 00:05:37,502 - Yay! Thank you. - I'll do it. 161 00:05:37,529 --> 00:05:39,063 - Yeah. - Oh, you are the best. 162 00:05:40,631 --> 00:05:41,866 - Hey, Nick. - Yeah. 163 00:05:41,933 --> 00:05:45,503 For Elvis-themed music, what about Elvis? 164 00:05:45,571 --> 00:05:46,804 I'm really... I'm so slammed right now. 165 00:05:46,872 --> 00:05:48,072 I can't hear, like, new stuff. 166 00:05:50,975 --> 00:05:53,677 Looking good, man. This was Walt's best suit. 167 00:05:53,745 --> 00:05:54,811 Look at all these buttons, Winston. 168 00:05:54,879 --> 00:05:56,280 I look like a remote control. 169 00:05:56,347 --> 00:05:58,482 - It looks good. - I can't mourn in this. 170 00:05:58,549 --> 00:06:00,684 - I don't even know how to use these buttons. - Hey, look, 171 00:06:00,752 --> 00:06:01,885 we're not mourning, okay? 172 00:06:02,452 --> 00:06:04,755 This is a celebration, you know? That's what funerals are about... 173 00:06:04,822 --> 00:06:06,322 Winston, I just can't go to the funeral, okay? 174 00:06:06,390 --> 00:06:08,470 - I don't want to go! - What the hell is the problem? 175 00:06:09,224 --> 00:06:11,160 Look, I really want to support Nick. I do. 176 00:06:11,527 --> 00:06:12,728 I want to support his family. 177 00:06:12,796 --> 00:06:14,497 I want to be there for him, but... 178 00:06:15,714 --> 00:06:17,199 I'm scared of death. 179 00:06:19,017 --> 00:06:20,703 Uh... wow. Uh... 180 00:06:21,271 --> 00:06:23,204 Schmidt, you know, death is natural, you know? 181 00:06:23,272 --> 00:06:25,372 It's a natural part of life. Everybody's scared of death. 182 00:06:25,440 --> 00:06:27,942 Death, Winston. 183 00:06:28,010 --> 00:06:31,045 Death. Death. 184 00:06:31,113 --> 00:06:32,879 And let me ask you something, Winston: 185 00:06:32,947 --> 00:06:35,148 What's with this open casket thing? 186 00:06:35,216 --> 00:06:36,917 All of a sudden, I-I got to walk in 187 00:06:36,984 --> 00:06:38,519 and I got to see the carcass? 188 00:06:38,586 --> 00:06:39,953 That's crazy. 189 00:06:40,021 --> 00:06:41,622 What if... what if his eyes open? 190 00:06:41,690 --> 00:06:43,424 What if his eyes open, and then he comes 191 00:06:43,542 --> 00:06:45,142 and haunts all of us? Why do... Why... 192 00:06:45,210 --> 00:06:46,777 Literally, why are the buttons on here? 193 00:06:46,844 --> 00:06:48,144 Because they're not holding anything together, 194 00:06:48,212 --> 00:06:49,546 yet I don't know which buttons are buttoned. 195 00:06:49,613 --> 00:06:51,247 How do you get this thing off, Winston?! 196 00:06:51,315 --> 00:06:52,882 I don't understand this middle-class button system! 197 00:06:52,950 --> 00:06:53,883 Get it off of me! 198 00:06:56,720 --> 00:06:59,155 So I don't think I'm gonna go to the funeral, man. 199 00:06:59,223 --> 00:07:01,491 I think I'm gonna hang back. 200 00:07:01,559 --> 00:07:04,859 So, um, I'm helping Nick with the eulogy. 201 00:07:04,927 --> 00:07:06,861 I'll give you the goods on Walt, Glasses Face. 202 00:07:06,929 --> 00:07:09,698 My pop had a table at every diner in the city. 203 00:07:09,765 --> 00:07:13,168 He had silverware from the finest hotels in the area. 204 00:07:13,236 --> 00:07:16,305 He had a gold chain as thick as floss. 205 00:07:16,372 --> 00:07:18,740 But, like, thick floss. 206 00:07:18,808 --> 00:07:20,575 Wait, Walt's got that chain? 207 00:07:20,642 --> 00:07:21,809 Yeah, he got that chain. That's his chain. 208 00:07:21,876 --> 00:07:23,578 That was my dad's chain. 209 00:07:23,645 --> 00:07:25,079 No, it was Walt's signature piece. 210 00:07:25,147 --> 00:07:27,248 No, he got that from the Seiko watch deal. 211 00:07:27,316 --> 00:07:29,683 No, he got it from the dishwasher arrangement. 212 00:07:29,751 --> 00:07:31,072 - No, he didn't. - Yes, he did. 213 00:07:31,086 --> 00:07:32,606 My dad took a dart in the eye for that. 214 00:07:32,621 --> 00:07:34,122 I don't care what your dad took a dart 215 00:07:34,189 --> 00:07:35,489 - in the eye for. - Guys. Guys, guys, guys. 216 00:07:35,556 --> 00:07:37,524 - Can we refocus? - I can't! 217 00:07:37,592 --> 00:07:39,935 Because he's accusing my father of thievery! 218 00:07:39,961 --> 00:07:40,585 Hey! 219 00:07:40,628 --> 00:07:42,429 - Can we just talk about Walt? - Yeah, so what's the deal 220 00:07:42,497 --> 00:07:44,664 with you and Nick? Are you guys, uh... 221 00:07:45,732 --> 00:07:46,600 Could you... 222 00:07:46,667 --> 00:07:48,427 could you stop doing that with your eyebrows? 223 00:07:49,236 --> 00:07:51,570 Please stop doing... Stop. 224 00:07:51,638 --> 00:07:53,199 - They're doing it. They're doing it. - Yeah. 225 00:07:53,206 --> 00:07:56,008 - No. - Whoever denied it supplied it. 226 00:07:56,075 --> 00:07:57,943 Now, this would be the casket. 227 00:07:59,011 --> 00:08:00,446 And now I'm dead. 228 00:08:00,514 --> 00:08:02,648 - So approach me and don't be afraid. - Just promise 229 00:08:02,715 --> 00:08:04,650 not to move, all right? 230 00:08:04,717 --> 00:08:07,019 - That's what I'm afraid of most. - Are you k... are you kidding me? 231 00:08:07,086 --> 00:08:09,187 - Also, you can't breathe. - Schmidt, I need to breathe, okay? 232 00:08:09,255 --> 00:08:11,222 Because I'm coaching you, and also for regular life reasons. 233 00:08:11,290 --> 00:08:12,858 Now, just calm down, 234 00:08:12,925 --> 00:08:15,861 find a joyful memory and let it lift you to the sky. 235 00:08:21,467 --> 00:08:23,701 You left us too soon, 236 00:08:23,769 --> 00:08:26,103 - you beautiful black butterfly. - Start over. 237 00:08:26,171 --> 00:08:28,139 You know, when we first met, 238 00:08:28,206 --> 00:08:31,108 I thought that we would be rivals. 239 00:08:31,176 --> 00:08:34,979 For Nick's attention, for who wore Easter colors best. 240 00:08:35,047 --> 00:08:39,416 And then rivalry became friendship. 241 00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:48,474 We've laughed, we've swum. 242 00:08:48,542 --> 00:08:50,676 You cut my toenails. 243 00:08:50,744 --> 00:08:52,711 Are you the brother that I never had? 244 00:08:52,779 --> 00:08:54,847 No. 245 00:08:55,165 --> 00:08:57,816 - You're the brother that I've always had. - That was beautiful. 246 00:08:57,883 --> 00:08:59,584 - What are you doing, man?! - You moved! Whoa! What the hell? 247 00:08:59,652 --> 00:09:01,236 Of course I moved! I'm not a real dead person! 248 00:09:01,404 --> 00:09:02,838 - You ghoul! - Why do I do this for you? 249 00:09:02,906 --> 00:09:04,472 Forget it, man. I'm never going to this thing. 250 00:09:04,540 --> 00:09:06,075 - You just made it worse. - What's wrong with you? 251 00:09:06,142 --> 00:09:07,475 $2,000? 252 00:09:07,543 --> 00:09:09,244 What if it wasn't six feet under? 253 00:09:09,912 --> 00:09:11,146 - How much for three feet? - I've gone through 254 00:09:11,214 --> 00:09:12,847 half a pack of ciggie gum here. 255 00:09:12,915 --> 00:09:15,316 - You want some of my weed? - Where are we on the food? 256 00:09:15,383 --> 00:09:16,751 We-we got to have Elvis food. 257 00:09:16,819 --> 00:09:19,386 - Ma, I'm making calls right now. - It's got to be perfect. 258 00:09:19,454 --> 00:09:20,587 It's gonna be perfect. You just got to let me do it. 259 00:09:20,613 --> 00:09:21,813 If the food isn't Elvis-themed, 260 00:09:22,224 --> 00:09:24,544 - does it matter that much? - You got a problem with Elvis? 261 00:09:24,559 --> 00:09:25,530 - I don't... - No, she didn't say that. 262 00:09:25,556 --> 00:09:27,098 I'm gonna have to call you back. No, she didn't say that. 263 00:09:27,124 --> 00:09:28,587 - She didn't say that about Elvis. - I was just suggesting 264 00:09:29,030 --> 00:09:30,597 that maybe the Elvis theme doesn't matter as much... 265 00:09:30,664 --> 00:09:32,099 You don't think Elvis is important? 266 00:09:32,166 --> 00:09:33,967 - She knows Elvis is important, Ma! - Elvis is everything! 267 00:09:34,035 --> 00:09:36,236 I know. He's the King. He's the King. 268 00:09:36,303 --> 00:09:38,605 I'm sorry, Bonnie. He's the King. 269 00:09:38,672 --> 00:09:40,974 - Jess. - Nick... 270 00:09:41,042 --> 00:09:43,882 I'm here to help, but I can't write this eulogy. 271 00:09:43,908 --> 00:09:44,835 Wait, what? 272 00:09:44,878 --> 00:09:47,046 - Do you want some of my weed? - I asked you to do one thing. 273 00:09:47,114 --> 00:09:49,181 - I need you to write the eulogy. - But I didn't know Walt. 274 00:09:49,249 --> 00:09:51,784 Nobody wants to hear what I have to say about my dad. 275 00:09:51,852 --> 00:09:53,753 It doesn't matter what you say. You just... you h... 276 00:09:53,820 --> 00:09:55,287 you have to say good-bye to him. 277 00:09:55,355 --> 00:09:57,489 I'm not asking you to do too much. 278 00:09:57,557 --> 00:10:00,458 Just write my father's eulogy. 279 00:10:00,525 --> 00:10:01,793 I can't handle this! 280 00:10:01,861 --> 00:10:03,928 - Nick. - My dad's chain! 281 00:10:03,996 --> 00:10:05,009 - Nick. - I want that chain! 282 00:10:05,010 --> 00:10:06,931 Hey, Nick! Nick! He popped me right in my cherry! 283 00:10:06,999 --> 00:10:08,800 That's not what that means, Jamie! 284 00:10:08,868 --> 00:10:10,268 - Then what does it mean?! - Nick! 285 00:10:10,335 --> 00:10:12,436 Where are you going? 286 00:10:13,004 --> 00:10:15,140 I forgot my jacket. It's really cold outside! 287 00:10:15,207 --> 00:10:16,339 Nick, wait! 288 00:10:17,207 --> 00:10:18,074 Ow! 289 00:10:28,529 --> 00:10:29,530 - Hey. - Hey. 290 00:10:29,597 --> 00:10:31,132 When's the last time you saw Nick? 291 00:10:31,199 --> 00:10:32,483 - Is he not here? - What are you guys talking about? 292 00:10:32,551 --> 00:10:33,885 Schmidt, if you want to hear what we're saying, 293 00:10:33,952 --> 00:10:35,319 - come over here. - Don't shout across the room. 294 00:10:35,387 --> 00:10:36,654 It's bad luck to see the body before the funeral. 295 00:10:36,722 --> 00:10:38,289 No, that's, like, a wedding thing, Schmidt. 296 00:10:38,356 --> 00:10:39,589 Shh. 297 00:10:39,657 --> 00:10:40,490 I think I said something to Nick. 298 00:10:40,558 --> 00:10:41,758 I think this is my fault. 299 00:10:41,826 --> 00:10:43,894 Hey, everybody! I brought Elvis! 300 00:10:43,961 --> 00:10:45,495 - Funeral saved. - What? 301 00:10:45,563 --> 00:10:47,831 - Hey, happy funeral, Jess. - What happened? 302 00:10:47,899 --> 00:10:49,499 What happened is I found this guy at the bar 303 00:10:49,567 --> 00:10:51,001 and he fits into the costume, 304 00:10:51,069 --> 00:10:52,803 so for 20 bucks, he's gonna be Elvis. 305 00:10:53,120 --> 00:10:55,321 I thought you wanted me to kill Elvis for 20 bucks. 306 00:10:55,388 --> 00:10:57,456 Then why would I give you the outfit, Brendan? 307 00:10:57,523 --> 00:10:58,874 The element of surprise? 308 00:10:58,875 --> 00:11:00,109 - Yeah. - The mirror effect? 309 00:11:00,177 --> 00:11:01,410 - He's gonna be perfect. - Mmm. 310 00:11:01,977 --> 00:11:03,079 Whose birthday is it? 311 00:11:03,146 --> 00:11:04,113 No, it's my dad's funeral. 312 00:11:04,181 --> 00:11:05,280 I'm gonna go find cake. 313 00:11:05,348 --> 00:11:06,588 How much have you had to drink? 314 00:11:06,649 --> 00:11:08,350 One dozen beers. And I wrote... 315 00:11:08,418 --> 00:11:10,285 I did what you asked me to do, Jessica. 316 00:11:10,353 --> 00:11:12,073 - I wrote the, uh, gigleography. - The what? 317 00:11:12,121 --> 00:11:13,688 - The gigleography. - A "gigleography"? 318 00:11:13,756 --> 00:11:15,090 Urology. 319 00:11:15,157 --> 00:11:16,758 Elegy? Eulogish. 320 00:11:16,826 --> 00:11:17,892 You wrote the eulogy. 321 00:11:17,960 --> 00:11:19,081 That's what I've been saying 322 00:11:19,095 --> 00:11:19,994 the whole time-- it's right here. 323 00:11:20,062 --> 00:11:22,296 "Walt Miller. Am I right?" 324 00:11:22,364 --> 00:11:24,699 Am I right? Am I right? 325 00:11:24,767 --> 00:11:27,101 - That's terrible. - Googaliogy! 326 00:11:27,168 --> 00:11:28,568 All right, here's what we're gonna do. 327 00:11:28,636 --> 00:11:31,338 I'm gonna sober up Nick and... and Elvis. 328 00:11:31,405 --> 00:11:33,440 You, go buy us some time. 329 00:11:33,507 --> 00:11:35,342 All right, Schmidt, stop asking people 330 00:11:35,409 --> 00:11:37,570 - if they can smell the body. That is rude. - I'll try. 331 00:11:37,612 --> 00:11:39,412 - It's inappropriate and it's offensive, okay? - Okay, but I just... 332 00:11:39,480 --> 00:11:40,748 - All right? It's what I... - ...it's what I'm thinking. 333 00:11:40,815 --> 00:11:42,582 I got this. Shh. I got this. 334 00:11:42,650 --> 00:11:44,570 - Just don't say anything, okay? Come on. - Hi... 335 00:11:49,022 --> 00:11:51,190 Uh... the chain. 336 00:11:52,492 --> 00:11:54,393 Some... someone should stop... 337 00:11:54,461 --> 00:11:56,162 'Cause he's taking the chain. 338 00:11:59,298 --> 00:12:00,132 Hey, hey, quit it, man. 339 00:12:00,199 --> 00:12:01,432 - Don't do that. - Hey, beat it, Cali. 340 00:12:01,500 --> 00:12:02,467 Long Island, son. 341 00:12:02,534 --> 00:12:04,369 - I don't care. - Get off of it, man. 342 00:12:04,436 --> 00:12:05,771 - Just stop it. Stop it. - You touching me? You touching me? 343 00:12:05,838 --> 00:12:07,172 - Yeah, I'm touching you. - You don't touch me. 344 00:12:07,240 --> 00:12:08,807 - I don't want to go near that. - You don't touch me! 345 00:12:08,875 --> 00:12:10,075 - Quit it. - Do you want to go? 346 00:12:11,944 --> 00:12:13,444 Come on, do it. Come on, come on. 347 00:12:13,512 --> 00:12:14,579 - Here we go. - Get away from Walt's chain, man! 348 00:12:14,647 --> 00:12:15,545 I'm just saying... 349 00:12:15,613 --> 00:12:17,281 I... n-no! N-n-n-n-no! 350 00:12:17,348 --> 00:12:19,150 Please, no, no, no, no! No! 351 00:12:19,217 --> 00:12:20,751 - Desecration! - Shut up. 352 00:12:20,819 --> 00:12:21,718 Shut up. 353 00:12:21,787 --> 00:12:22,753 There's no desecration. 354 00:12:23,821 --> 00:12:24,855 Don't interrupt me. 355 00:12:24,923 --> 00:12:26,023 That's my dad's chain, and I'm taking it. 356 00:12:26,091 --> 00:12:28,025 - Shut your mouth. - What's wrong with you? 357 00:12:28,093 --> 00:12:30,060 Bobby, shut up. 358 00:12:33,663 --> 00:12:35,499 Dude, he's dead. What are you doing? 359 00:12:36,566 --> 00:12:37,967 - What are you doing? - Ooh! 360 00:12:39,035 --> 00:12:40,003 - What are you doing? - I'm not afraid. 361 00:12:40,070 --> 00:12:41,704 - Not afraid of what? - I'm not afraid. 362 00:12:42,272 --> 00:12:43,873 I can do this. 363 00:12:44,441 --> 00:12:47,242 I can do this all day. 364 00:12:47,310 --> 00:12:48,911 - Come on, don't do that. - All day, son. 365 00:12:48,945 --> 00:12:50,665 Come on, don't-don't put your head in there. 366 00:12:50,713 --> 00:12:52,633 - Don't put your head in there, all right? - All day. 367 00:12:52,648 --> 00:12:54,016 - Dude, that's my uncle. - Come get your chain, Boston! 368 00:12:54,083 --> 00:12:55,217 What? All day! 369 00:12:55,285 --> 00:12:57,552 All day! All day! 370 00:12:58,120 --> 00:12:59,554 - All day! - I don't need it. 371 00:12:59,622 --> 00:13:02,424 - I don't want it. - What's up! 372 00:13:02,491 --> 00:13:04,591 I know you told me to write it, but I couldn't. 373 00:13:04,659 --> 00:13:06,493 I didn't have anything to say. 374 00:13:06,561 --> 00:13:07,761 You're mad at me. 375 00:13:07,829 --> 00:13:09,530 You've got the mad face. 376 00:13:09,597 --> 00:13:11,598 I'm not mad at you, Nick. 377 00:13:11,666 --> 00:13:12,966 I'm not mad at you. 378 00:13:13,034 --> 00:13:14,868 I have your back. 379 00:13:14,936 --> 00:13:17,538 No matter what, no matter how stupid it gets, and... 380 00:13:17,605 --> 00:13:20,239 you and I both know 381 00:13:20,307 --> 00:13:22,842 it can get really, really stupid. 382 00:13:22,909 --> 00:13:25,712 - I am the stupidest of all the stupid boys. - No. 383 00:13:25,779 --> 00:13:29,215 I'm gonna be there, and I'm gonna hold your hand, 384 00:13:29,282 --> 00:13:31,484 and I wanted to tell you that last night, 385 00:13:31,552 --> 00:13:33,453 but you ran away. 386 00:13:34,320 --> 00:13:35,221 Yeah. 387 00:13:40,025 --> 00:13:41,660 I want to meet your mom. 388 00:13:41,728 --> 00:13:42,994 Oh, my God. 389 00:13:43,062 --> 00:13:44,796 Hey, Elvis! 390 00:13:44,864 --> 00:13:47,399 What are we going to do, Winnie? 391 00:13:47,467 --> 00:13:49,735 - Everyone's waiting. - Mrs. Miller, how about I just 392 00:13:49,802 --> 00:13:51,035 go up there and I say a few words? 393 00:13:51,103 --> 00:13:52,737 - Keep it light, keep it happy. - Right. 394 00:13:52,804 --> 00:13:55,105 Don't mention the felony thing. 395 00:13:55,673 --> 00:13:57,107 Or Paraguay, 396 00:13:57,175 --> 00:14:00,243 or the storage space. 397 00:14:00,310 --> 00:14:01,578 Hey, y'all. 398 00:14:02,145 --> 00:14:03,747 Ah... 399 00:14:03,814 --> 00:14:05,648 Now, some of y'all know me. 400 00:14:05,716 --> 00:14:06,816 I am Winston. 401 00:14:07,786 --> 00:14:10,754 And I look at today as a celebration. 402 00:14:10,821 --> 00:14:11,755 - So let's have a party. - That's right. 403 00:14:11,822 --> 00:14:13,423 You know, because a party 404 00:14:13,491 --> 00:14:15,724 is what Walt would have... 405 00:14:24,500 --> 00:14:25,701 A party is... 406 00:14:25,769 --> 00:14:27,335 a party, uh... 407 00:14:30,773 --> 00:14:33,741 - Walt would have wanted us to have a party. - Oh, dear. 408 00:14:36,845 --> 00:14:38,045 I can do this. 409 00:14:38,113 --> 00:14:40,281 I can do this, I can do this. 410 00:14:48,856 --> 00:14:51,090 Oh, Walt! 411 00:14:53,227 --> 00:14:55,194 I can't do this no more, Walt! 412 00:14:59,434 --> 00:15:01,134 Hey. You done with this? 413 00:15:01,201 --> 00:15:02,335 Hey! What's going on? 414 00:15:03,970 --> 00:15:05,638 - This is Elvis? - No... 415 00:15:05,705 --> 00:15:07,145 This funeral's going down the toilet. 416 00:15:07,206 --> 00:15:08,407 I promised Walter it'd be 417 00:15:08,475 --> 00:15:10,042 beautiful and full of life. 418 00:15:10,109 --> 00:15:11,811 I promised. 419 00:15:11,878 --> 00:15:12,812 I'm sending everyone home. 420 00:15:12,879 --> 00:15:14,413 Wait. Bonnie. 421 00:15:14,481 --> 00:15:16,549 Are you tapping me on the shoulder, girlie? 422 00:15:16,616 --> 00:15:18,550 Let me make this totally clear. 423 00:15:18,617 --> 00:15:19,751 I don't want you here. 424 00:15:19,819 --> 00:15:20,919 I don't know you. 425 00:15:20,986 --> 00:15:22,320 I don't know your people. 426 00:15:23,689 --> 00:15:25,156 You tap me twice? 427 00:15:25,223 --> 00:15:26,858 I... please wait for Nick. 428 00:15:26,926 --> 00:15:27,959 It's important. 429 00:15:28,026 --> 00:15:29,761 Then why is he not here? 430 00:15:29,829 --> 00:15:32,263 No eulogy? No Elvis? 431 00:15:32,331 --> 00:15:33,765 I'd rather not have a funeral 432 00:15:33,833 --> 00:15:35,466 if it's not gonna honor my husband. 433 00:15:39,504 --> 00:15:41,004 And I'm out. 434 00:15:43,541 --> 00:15:45,275 I want to thank you for coming, 435 00:15:45,343 --> 00:15:49,012 but it's, uh, over now, so... 436 00:15:52,916 --> 00:15:54,283 Stop the funeral! 437 00:15:54,351 --> 00:15:55,852 Everybody sit down. 438 00:15:58,589 --> 00:16:00,823 This is the King. 439 00:16:00,891 --> 00:16:01,724 What the hell? 440 00:16:01,792 --> 00:16:03,359 I think you mean... 441 00:16:03,426 --> 00:16:05,427 "What the heaven?" 442 00:16:05,896 --> 00:16:07,028 Mama. 443 00:16:07,096 --> 00:16:08,096 It's Elvis. 444 00:16:08,163 --> 00:16:11,199 ♪ As the snow flies ♪ 445 00:16:11,266 --> 00:16:14,302 ♪ On a cold and gray Chicago ♪ 446 00:16:14,370 --> 00:16:15,370 What is this? 447 00:16:15,437 --> 00:16:17,171 ♪ A poor little baby child ♪ 448 00:16:17,239 --> 00:16:18,707 ♪ Was born ♪ 449 00:16:21,243 --> 00:16:22,877 ♪ In the ghetto ♪ 450 00:16:24,178 --> 00:16:27,147 ♪ In the ghetto ♪ 451 00:16:27,215 --> 00:16:29,316 ♪ And his mama cried ♪ 452 00:16:29,384 --> 00:16:32,119 ♪ Cause if there's one thing that she don't need ♪ 453 00:16:32,186 --> 00:16:35,355 ♪ It's another hungry mouth to feed ♪ 454 00:16:38,692 --> 00:16:41,761 ♪ In the ghetto ♪ 455 00:16:43,531 --> 00:16:45,598 ♪ In the ghetto ♪ 456 00:16:45,666 --> 00:16:48,401 You know, this is every day in North Korea. 457 00:16:48,468 --> 00:16:49,769 ♪ Down in Chi-town ♪ 458 00:16:51,104 --> 00:16:54,040 ♪ In the ghetto ♪ 459 00:16:55,274 --> 00:16:56,675 ♪ In the ghetto. ♪ 460 00:16:56,743 --> 00:16:57,943 I'm gonna hit her. 461 00:16:58,011 --> 00:17:00,111 Mom, please. 462 00:17:00,179 --> 00:17:01,980 Dad would've liked this. 463 00:17:02,048 --> 00:17:03,615 He would've faked 464 00:17:03,683 --> 00:17:05,884 a slip and fall and sued the funeral home. 465 00:17:05,952 --> 00:17:08,554 But he would've liked this. 466 00:17:09,989 --> 00:17:11,488 Thank you, Jess. 467 00:17:11,557 --> 00:17:12,790 You're welcome, Mama. 468 00:17:12,858 --> 00:17:14,959 Oh... 469 00:17:25,904 --> 00:17:27,370 I used to always tell my dad 470 00:17:27,438 --> 00:17:29,940 that I hated Elvis just to piss him off. 471 00:17:31,007 --> 00:17:32,776 And he would get really mad 472 00:17:32,843 --> 00:17:35,612 the way Walt could get really mad. 473 00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:38,381 And, uh, he would turn it up loud 474 00:17:38,449 --> 00:17:42,118 just to spite me and sing all the Elvis songs. 475 00:17:46,590 --> 00:17:48,223 He was very good at gambling. 476 00:17:50,292 --> 00:17:51,594 He had a great mustache. 477 00:17:53,863 --> 00:17:55,731 - Hey, man. - What? 478 00:17:55,799 --> 00:17:57,967 And he was so mean to cabbies in such a cool way. 479 00:17:59,702 --> 00:18:02,204 And he never was scared. 480 00:18:03,872 --> 00:18:06,108 How did he do that? 481 00:18:09,512 --> 00:18:13,215 I don't know if Walt was... 482 00:18:13,282 --> 00:18:15,316 a good guy or a bad guy 483 00:18:15,383 --> 00:18:17,951 in the whole scheme of things, you know. 484 00:18:20,822 --> 00:18:23,357 But he was my dad, and I'm sure gonna miss him. 485 00:18:42,510 --> 00:18:44,644 You okay, Mama? 486 00:18:45,111 --> 00:18:47,513 Yeah, I'm gonna be okay, Mama. 487 00:18:49,349 --> 00:18:50,782 ♪ 'Cause if there's one thing ♪ 488 00:18:50,850 --> 00:18:52,551 ♪ That she don't need ♪ 489 00:18:52,619 --> 00:18:57,022 ♪ It's another hungry mouth to feed ♪ 490 00:18:57,089 --> 00:18:59,858 ♪ In the ghetto ♪ 491 00:19:03,728 --> 00:19:05,996 ♪ In the ghetto ♪ 492 00:19:09,168 --> 00:19:11,969 ♪ In the ghetto ♪ 493 00:19:12,037 --> 00:19:15,406 ♪ In the ghetto ♪ 494 00:19:15,474 --> 00:19:17,808 ♪ In the ghetto ♪ 495 00:19:17,876 --> 00:19:19,143 ♪ In the ghetto ♪ 496 00:19:19,210 --> 00:19:21,645 ♪ - In the ghetto ♪ 497 00:19:21,712 --> 00:19:22,912 ♪ In the ghetto ♪ 498 00:19:22,980 --> 00:19:24,548 ♪ In the ghetto ♪ 499 00:19:24,615 --> 00:19:26,816 I really feel transported to the ghetto. 500 00:19:26,884 --> 00:19:29,719 ♪ In the ghetto, in the ghetto... ♪ 501 00:19:32,018 --> 00:19:34,853 You owe me a gold chain, or at least the price of a gold chain. 502 00:19:34,920 --> 00:19:37,921 Or maybe just a giant lobster. It's all about the gesture, 503 00:19:37,990 --> 00:19:39,190 and I will get my gesture. 504 00:19:39,208 --> 00:19:42,358 My face touched the mustache of a carcass today, Bobby. 505 00:19:42,426 --> 00:19:43,560 I'm not afraid of you. 506 00:19:43,627 --> 00:19:45,728 I got some advice for you: Stay out of Boston. 507 00:19:45,796 --> 00:19:47,797 - What, you gonna keep me out of the whole city? - I work TSA at Logan. 508 00:19:47,864 --> 00:19:50,266 I'll put a gun in your luggage. 509 00:19:50,334 --> 00:19:52,402 Why do you got to bring weapons into it, Bobby? 510 00:19:52,720 --> 00:19:54,687 Hey, wh-where do you think you're going with that hat? 511 00:19:54,755 --> 00:19:57,056 Bonnie, I just really wanted something to remember him by. 512 00:19:57,123 --> 00:19:58,204 Uh-huh. Empty your pockets. 513 00:19:58,258 --> 00:19:59,924 Okay, look, all I got 514 00:19:59,992 --> 00:20:02,427 is this fishing wire 515 00:20:02,495 --> 00:20:04,128 and a Wrigley ticket stub with a button, 516 00:20:04,196 --> 00:20:05,630 and then there's the... 517 00:20:05,698 --> 00:20:07,632 there's the leg to his favorite chair, 518 00:20:07,700 --> 00:20:09,234 and there's the... 519 00:20:09,301 --> 00:20:11,002 Come. 520 00:20:11,070 --> 00:20:12,904 You keep it all. 521 00:20:18,342 --> 00:20:19,142 Hey, Bonnie. 522 00:20:19,210 --> 00:20:20,110 - Oh, sorry. - Mm-hmm. 523 00:20:20,178 --> 00:20:21,445 I almost tapped you. 524 00:20:21,513 --> 00:20:23,614 You scare me. 525 00:20:23,682 --> 00:20:26,851 Pretty fun weekend all in, though, right? 526 00:20:26,918 --> 00:20:28,586 I packed you a snack for the trip. 527 00:20:30,388 --> 00:20:31,688 Oh. 528 00:20:31,756 --> 00:20:33,222 Cheese puffs. 529 00:20:33,290 --> 00:20:34,391 - Thank you. - Mm-hmm. 530 00:20:34,458 --> 00:20:36,158 - Come here. - Oh... 531 00:20:36,226 --> 00:20:37,761 Ooh. 532 00:20:37,828 --> 00:20:39,729 - Oh, hey, Nick? - Yeah? 533 00:20:39,797 --> 00:20:41,631 How far away you are from getting married? 534 00:20:41,699 --> 00:20:42,766 I don't know. 535 00:20:42,833 --> 00:20:44,134 'Cause, uh, you know, 536 00:20:44,135 --> 00:20:47,168 DeAnn and I were thinking about getting married, so... 537 00:20:47,236 --> 00:20:48,637 Jamie, you know, brothers don't have 538 00:20:48,705 --> 00:20:50,205 to get married in order. 539 00:20:51,808 --> 00:20:54,209 DeAnn, we're doing this! 540 00:20:56,646 --> 00:20:58,313 Hey, I couldn't find the, uh, cat. 541 00:20:58,381 --> 00:21:00,248 I looked all over, but I just decided 542 00:21:00,316 --> 00:21:01,717 to clean out the litter box. 543 00:21:01,785 --> 00:21:05,119 I... owe you an apology. 544 00:21:05,186 --> 00:21:06,353 What are you talking about? 545 00:21:06,422 --> 00:21:08,689 We all depended on you so much, 546 00:21:08,757 --> 00:21:10,291 and you were just a kid. 547 00:21:10,358 --> 00:21:12,359 - Don't do this, Ma. - I'm just saying. 548 00:21:12,428 --> 00:21:14,729 You're going through enough. 549 00:21:14,797 --> 00:21:16,798 I'm glad you have someone who takes care of you. 550 00:21:21,903 --> 00:21:24,103 I love you, Ma. 551 00:21:28,707 --> 00:21:29,909 Visit more. 552 00:21:29,976 --> 00:21:32,611 So I don't have to talk to your brother all the time. 553 00:21:32,679 --> 00:21:34,179 She said yes! 554 00:21:37,551 --> 00:21:39,184 ♪ Ooh, hoo, hoo ♪ 555 00:21:39,252 --> 00:21:41,320 ♪ I feel my temperature rising ♪ 556 00:21:43,189 --> 00:21:44,889 ♪ Burning, burning ♪ 557 00:21:44,957 --> 00:21:47,158 ♪ Must be 109 ♪ 558 00:21:49,662 --> 00:21:51,262 ♪ Cause your ♪ 559 00:21:51,330 --> 00:21:53,898 ♪ Kisses light my fire ♪ 560 00:21:53,966 --> 00:21:56,968 ♪ And the sweet sound of the choir ♪ 561 00:21:57,035 --> 00:21:59,235 ♪ And you light my morning sky ♪ 562 00:21:59,303 --> 00:22:01,404 ♪ Of burning love ♪ 563 00:22:01,473 --> 00:22:04,207 ♪ Ooh, I'm just a hunk, a hunk of burning love ♪ 564 00:22:04,275 --> 00:22:06,309 ♪ Ooh, I'm just a hunk, a hunk ♪ 565 00:22:06,377 --> 00:22:08,376 ♪ Of burning love, ooh. ♪ 566 00:22:08,377 --> 00:22:10,145 Pallbearers, please come down. 567 00:22:10,146 --> 00:22:14,246 Sync & corrections by Alice www.addic7ed.com