1
00:00:01,841 --> 00:00:03,142
I love these parties.
2
00:00:03,209 --> 00:00:06,011
I feel like I'm
an ambassador, or a spy,
3
00:00:06,078 --> 00:00:07,779
or, like, a really
high-class prostitute.
4
00:00:08,347 --> 00:00:10,214
Well, Jess,
it's a political fundraiser.
5
00:00:10,282 --> 00:00:11,882
Who's to say
you can't be all three?
6
00:00:12,450 --> 00:00:14,685
Hey, this is...
really good.
7
00:00:14,753 --> 00:00:16,954
I mean, I gotta tell you,
I'm really, um...
8
00:00:17,022 --> 00:00:18,356
- Happy.
- Happy.
9
00:00:18,424 --> 00:00:21,158
It's like the complete
opposite of my marriage.
10
00:00:21,225 --> 00:00:22,792
I'll give you
the opposite of your marriage.
11
00:00:22,860 --> 00:00:24,827
- What?
- Sorry, I just...
12
00:00:24,895 --> 00:00:26,663
I've never heard you talk
about your ex-wife,
13
00:00:26,730 --> 00:00:28,165
and I got really nervous and...
14
00:00:28,232 --> 00:00:30,700
I tried to flirt
information out of you.
15
00:00:30,768 --> 00:00:32,102
- Aw...
- So...
16
00:00:32,170 --> 00:00:34,071
I haven't been home in a week,
17
00:00:34,138 --> 00:00:35,439
and, um...
18
00:00:35,506 --> 00:00:38,840
underneath my dress,
I'm wearing...
19
00:00:38,908 --> 00:00:41,009
a pair of your boxer briefs
20
00:00:41,078 --> 00:00:42,811
that I borrowed
21
00:00:42,879 --> 00:00:44,346
/ stole
22
00:00:44,414 --> 00:00:48,417
/ I'm not giving them back.
23
00:00:48,485 --> 00:00:50,786
Come on. Let's go.
Go to my house right now.
24
00:00:50,853 --> 00:00:52,921
Well, I have to go
to my home for a bit.
25
00:00:52,989 --> 00:00:54,255
No, no, come on.
26
00:00:54,323 --> 00:00:55,890
Come on. Stay with me.
27
00:00:55,958 --> 00:00:58,159
No, I'm worried about the guys.
28
00:00:58,227 --> 00:01:01,563
They must really be missing me
and wondering where I am.
29
00:01:01,630 --> 00:01:03,764
Hey! Sacrifice, sacrifice,
30
00:01:03,832 --> 00:01:05,333
Lava! Touched the lava!
...sacrifice...
31
00:01:05,401 --> 00:01:07,635
Touched the lava! Ow, ow!
Touched the lava, dude!
32
00:01:07,703 --> 00:01:10,070
♪ Who's that girl? ♪
♪ Who's that girl? ♪
33
00:01:10,138 --> 00:01:12,038
♪ It's Jess. ♪
Sync by Alice | www.addic7ed.com
34
00:01:12,039 --> 00:01:14,608
Sync by Alice | www.addic7ed.com
35
00:01:14,609 --> 00:01:15,709
Sync by Alice | www.addic7ed.com
36
00:01:17,046 --> 00:01:19,746
He's the worst quaterbard in the league,
I mean, statistically, it would be better
37
00:01:19,814 --> 00:01:20,948
if he wasn't even playing,
all right?
38
00:01:21,016 --> 00:01:22,917
You're listening to the radio
and writing with a pen?
39
00:01:23,485 --> 00:01:24,485
What decade are we in?
40
00:01:24,552 --> 00:01:26,152
I cannot listen to that guy.
41
00:01:26,220 --> 00:01:27,921
Come on.
Joe Napoli's the worst, man.
42
00:01:27,989 --> 00:01:30,624
What?
Man, that is blasphemous.
43
00:01:30,691 --> 00:01:32,358
He's the king of
sports radio, man.
44
00:01:32,426 --> 00:01:34,560
I've got an interview
with him today, okay?
45
00:01:34,629 --> 00:01:35,862
He's hiring a new
research assistant.
46
00:01:35,930 --> 00:01:37,463
Hence... the research.
47
00:01:37,531 --> 00:01:40,100
My old basketball coach
set it up.
48
00:01:40,167 --> 00:01:41,800
You know, I'm just
trying to figure out
49
00:01:41,868 --> 00:01:43,435
- how to break it to Elvin.
- You gotta cut ties with that kid.
50
00:01:43,503 --> 00:01:44,569
He freaks me out.
51
00:01:44,638 --> 00:01:45,938
He never blinks.
52
00:01:46,006 --> 00:01:47,673
He's like a tiny little owl
in a shirt.
53
00:01:48,741 --> 00:01:50,042
Hey, guys!
54
00:01:50,110 --> 00:01:52,377
- Hey. Hello.
- I have so much to tell you.
55
00:01:52,445 --> 00:01:54,246
I spent the whole week
with rich people.
56
00:01:54,313 --> 00:01:55,914
I finally tried port.
57
00:01:55,982 --> 00:01:58,950
Were you gone last week?
Is that why it was so quiet?
58
00:01:59,018 --> 00:02:01,552
I feel like I haven't
seen you guys in so long.
59
00:02:01,620 --> 00:02:03,387
You all look so handsome,
so grown-up.
60
00:02:03,455 --> 00:02:04,656
- Thank you.
- Hey, Nick.
61
00:02:04,723 --> 00:02:05,623
I finally notice
the one-eighth Cherokee.
62
00:02:05,691 --> 00:02:07,291
Winston...
63
00:02:07,359 --> 00:02:08,660
that's almost a mustache.
64
00:02:08,727 --> 00:02:11,663
Yeah. It's creepy and thin,
just like I like it.
65
00:02:11,730 --> 00:02:12,863
How was your sexcation
with Russell?
66
00:02:12,930 --> 00:02:14,765
I did have a lot of sex.
Thank you.
67
00:02:14,832 --> 00:02:16,533
What'd you guys do without me?
Hit me up with a headline!
68
00:02:16,600 --> 00:02:18,802
Nothing.
We played True American.
69
00:02:18,870 --> 00:02:21,258
What?! You played True
American without me?
70
00:02:21,259 --> 00:02:22,072
Yes, ma'am.
71
00:02:22,140 --> 00:02:24,474
Oh, sorry. It's Cece.
72
00:02:24,542 --> 00:02:27,010
- Hey, you!
- Tell me everything. How's it going?
73
00:02:27,078 --> 00:02:28,444
- Where are you?
- With Schmidt.
74
00:02:28,912 --> 00:02:29,979
Where are you?
75
00:02:30,847 --> 00:02:31,880
Right here.
76
00:02:31,947 --> 00:02:32,648
Wow.
77
00:02:32,716 --> 00:02:34,283
I am not used to this yet.
78
00:02:34,350 --> 00:02:35,951
I'm surprised
this one's still standing.
79
00:02:36,019 --> 00:02:38,154
We burned through
a lot of ideas last night.
80
00:02:38,221 --> 00:02:40,522
- That's really great.
- We went deep into the stables...
81
00:02:40,590 --> 00:02:42,324
- Yeah. Cool.
- Ugh.
82
00:02:42,392 --> 00:02:43,659
I don't know.
It's like we're living
83
00:02:43,727 --> 00:02:45,226
in a romantic comedy montage.
84
00:02:45,294 --> 00:02:48,897
Like, we, like, throw our heads
back when we laugh,
85
00:02:48,964 --> 00:02:50,631
and I, like, try on
floppy hats for him.
86
00:02:50,700 --> 00:02:52,366
It's pretty perfect.
87
00:02:52,434 --> 00:02:54,402
It's like the first act
of a TV movie
88
00:02:54,469 --> 00:02:57,405
until I find out that he has a
wife and kids in another state.
89
00:02:57,972 --> 00:03:00,341
Yeah, but nothing's
perfect, right?
90
00:03:00,409 --> 00:03:03,811
You're kind of doing
everything on his terms,
91
00:03:03,878 --> 00:03:07,280
living in his beautiful,
fancy house...
92
00:03:07,348 --> 00:03:08,816
I'm not really living there.
93
00:03:08,883 --> 00:03:10,918
Has he ever spent a night here?
94
00:03:11,985 --> 00:03:12,885
Hey, guys.
95
00:03:12,953 --> 00:03:14,088
So, listen, um...
96
00:03:14,155 --> 00:03:15,555
Russell's gonna come
and stay this weekend.
97
00:03:15,623 --> 00:03:17,223
I was just wondering
98
00:03:17,290 --> 00:03:18,557
if you guys could be cool?
99
00:03:18,625 --> 00:03:20,659
Yeah.
100
00:03:21,728 --> 00:03:23,162
- Sure.
- Okay, uh...
101
00:03:23,230 --> 00:03:25,932
Actually, I don't trust what
"cool" means to all of you,
102
00:03:26,499 --> 00:03:28,900
so how about we just say
"be normal"?
103
00:03:28,968 --> 00:03:30,736
- Big R.
- Schmidt.
104
00:03:31,303 --> 00:03:32,070
Your shoe's untied.
105
00:03:32,638 --> 00:03:33,171
Oh.
106
00:03:35,374 --> 00:03:36,741
- What are you doing?
- Label check, man.
107
00:03:36,808 --> 00:03:37,875
- What are you doing?
- Label check.
108
00:03:37,943 --> 00:03:39,943
- What are you doing?
- Just calm down.
109
00:03:42,481 --> 00:03:44,115
Did...
110
00:03:51,456 --> 00:03:53,257
I got it.
111
00:03:53,324 --> 00:03:54,758
- Russell!
- Whoa!
112
00:03:54,825 --> 00:03:56,860
Oh, man, you scared me.
113
00:03:56,927 --> 00:03:57,728
You scared of black people?
114
00:03:57,795 --> 00:03:59,229
No.
115
00:03:59,297 --> 00:04:01,565
- It's 2012, baby.
- I'm...
116
00:04:01,633 --> 00:04:02,350
- Yeah, of course.
- Done deal.
117
00:04:02,351 --> 00:04:03,166
- Easy.
- Of course.
118
00:04:03,234 --> 00:04:04,768
Quick question.
119
00:04:04,835 --> 00:04:06,669
Russell's such a visionary,
would it be okay
120
00:04:06,737 --> 00:04:09,305
if I took him
through my Idea Notebook?
121
00:04:09,373 --> 00:04:10,912
- Nope, not at all.
- Maybe I won't take him
122
00:04:10,913 --> 00:04:12,007
through the whole notebook...
123
00:04:12,075 --> 00:04:13,276
Or how about none of it?
124
00:04:13,277 --> 00:04:14,477
But I have one that I'm
really excited about
125
00:04:14,544 --> 00:04:17,112
called Real Apps, that I know
Russell would be interested in.
126
00:04:17,180 --> 00:04:19,148
- No.
- Nick, Real Apps is my idea.
127
00:04:19,215 --> 00:04:20,983
Real Apps is not your idea.
128
00:04:21,050 --> 00:04:22,717
Yeah, sure, you
might have birthed the idea,
129
00:04:22,785 --> 00:04:24,286
but I midwifed it, and I
midwifed the crap out of it.
130
00:04:24,353 --> 00:04:25,754
- Guys.
- It was a messy birth.
131
00:04:25,822 --> 00:04:26,721
You just thought of the name!
132
00:04:26,790 --> 00:04:28,356
The name is everything.
133
00:04:28,424 --> 00:04:29,892
The name is
the name of the game.
134
00:04:29,959 --> 00:04:32,094
The game is... is the name.
The game is the name.
135
00:04:32,162 --> 00:04:33,962
- The product is the game.
- Guys!
136
00:04:35,030 --> 00:04:38,098
I know you can do this.
137
00:04:38,166 --> 00:04:39,900
You sure you
don't want to swing?
138
00:04:39,967 --> 00:04:41,669
Nah. Pushing's
where the action is.
139
00:04:43,204 --> 00:04:46,039
Elvin, listen, buddy.
I think we should talk.
140
00:04:46,107 --> 00:04:47,741
You know I'm not going to
be here forever, right?
141
00:04:47,809 --> 00:04:50,177
I know about death, Winston.
142
00:04:50,244 --> 00:04:52,713
I know there's no farm
where dogs and grandpas go.
143
00:04:52,781 --> 00:04:55,548
What? No.
It's just that I'm an adult.
144
00:04:55,616 --> 00:04:57,983
It's time for me to get
an adult job with adult people.
145
00:04:58,051 --> 00:05:00,520
You understand, right?
146
00:05:00,587 --> 00:05:02,789
Maybe we should get
to work on your resume
147
00:05:02,856 --> 00:05:04,156
because yours is terrible.
148
00:05:04,224 --> 00:05:06,258
It's 2012, Winston.
149
00:05:06,327 --> 00:05:09,361
Typing is not a special skill.
150
00:05:11,497 --> 00:05:13,933
- And you're familiar with the show?
- Yes, I am. I've been listening for years.
151
00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:17,303
- What do you think of Mr. Napoli?
- He's actually like an idol of mine.
152
00:05:17,370 --> 00:05:18,503
Be honest, jackass!
153
00:05:21,174 --> 00:05:22,695
Would you consider yourself
an undercover cop?
154
00:05:22,696 --> 00:05:23,075
Huh?
155
00:05:23,143 --> 00:05:24,877
Seriously. Are you a cop?
You have to tell me.
156
00:05:24,878 --> 00:05:25,310
No!
157
00:05:25,377 --> 00:05:27,245
How far can you drag
an unconscious man?
158
00:05:27,313 --> 00:05:29,447
I don't know. I never really tried to...
Hello, Mr. Napoli.
159
00:05:29,514 --> 00:05:31,849
If you're as bad an assistant
as you were a point guard,
160
00:05:31,916 --> 00:05:32,817
I'll eat you.
161
00:05:32,885 --> 00:05:34,986
You know, I know you,
Winston Bishop, okay?
162
00:05:35,054 --> 00:05:37,155
Sub-par collegiate career,
went to Latvia,
163
00:05:37,223 --> 00:05:40,725
9% from the European/Women's
3-point line?
164
00:05:40,792 --> 00:05:42,726
- Okay, just...
- Now you wind up in my lap.
165
00:05:42,793 --> 00:05:44,127
Well, I'm the luckiest girl
in school.
166
00:05:44,195 --> 00:05:47,030
Hey, come on in, big guy. I want you to
meet our new assistant, Winston Bishop.
167
00:05:47,098 --> 00:05:49,833
Hey, first of all,
I've not agreed to do it...
168
00:05:50,401 --> 00:05:51,768
Welcome to the team, Winston.
169
00:05:51,836 --> 00:05:53,270
Hope Joe hasn't been
too tough on you.
170
00:05:55,706 --> 00:05:56,973
I'm in. I'll do it.
171
00:05:57,607 --> 00:05:58,574
Um...
172
00:05:59,341 --> 00:06:00,308
So nice to meet you,
173
00:06:00,377 --> 00:06:02,211
Mr. Kareem Abdul Jabbar.
174
00:06:02,779 --> 00:06:03,545
Can I sit on your shoulders?
175
00:06:03,613 --> 00:06:04,914
- Sure!
- Really?
176
00:06:04,982 --> 00:06:07,049
- No.
- Oh.
177
00:06:07,117 --> 00:06:09,551
You've made
a wonderful decision.
178
00:06:10,119 --> 00:06:11,220
I'm sure you're going
to learn a lot.
179
00:06:11,288 --> 00:06:12,888
Kareem Abdul Jabbar.
180
00:06:12,955 --> 00:06:15,390
Yeah, well, welcome aboard.
You can start today.
181
00:06:15,457 --> 00:06:17,525
I want to Kareem about
a segment on his show.
182
00:06:17,593 --> 00:06:19,660
I want to talk to you
about the jackets.
183
00:06:21,693 --> 00:06:25,060
_
184
00:06:19,728 --> 00:06:21,162
You said we were going
to get show jackets!
185
00:06:28,170 --> 00:06:29,803
Russell, hey.
186
00:06:29,871 --> 00:06:32,072
I could show you around.
I could show you our world.
187
00:06:32,140 --> 00:06:34,375
Way up here, it's crystal-clear.
188
00:06:34,442 --> 00:06:36,410
- Nick, you're doing Aladdin.
- Again?
189
00:06:36,977 --> 00:06:39,280
- Do you like cheeses, Russell?
- What? That's...
190
00:06:39,347 --> 00:06:41,248
- Nick, come on.
- It's for Russell.
191
00:06:43,783 --> 00:06:45,618
So you really just call
these "ethnic noodles"?
192
00:06:45,685 --> 00:06:47,052
No, actually, I don't know.
193
00:06:47,120 --> 00:06:48,754
The only English writing
on the box is,
194
00:06:49,522 --> 00:06:53,424
"Find water. Grow hot.
Family celebrate plus."
195
00:06:53,491 --> 00:06:54,825
That guy.
196
00:06:54,892 --> 00:06:56,126
Nick, stop staring.
197
00:06:56,194 --> 00:06:58,061
I'm not... what?
198
00:06:58,129 --> 00:06:59,730
Schmidt's being
really weird, too.
199
00:07:01,800 --> 00:07:05,402
So I told you and Jess to go
get some sushi at Asakune,
200
00:07:05,470 --> 00:07:07,471
but I hear you
hara-kiri'd that one.
201
00:07:07,539 --> 00:07:10,073
- Well, I know the chef at Namuda.
- Oh, oh. Namuda?
202
00:07:11,141 --> 00:07:13,242
Maybe "My First Sushi."
203
00:07:13,810 --> 00:07:16,245
Baby wants a tempura
California roll.
204
00:07:16,313 --> 00:07:17,647
Little Russell wants...
205
00:07:17,715 --> 00:07:20,483
Little Wussell wants
an avocwado roll!
206
00:07:20,551 --> 00:07:23,386
Schmidt...!
Nick, don't eat his noodles.
207
00:07:23,454 --> 00:07:25,687
- Yeah, but we're bowl brothers, now.
- No, you're not.
208
00:07:25,755 --> 00:07:28,057
- Tighten up, guys.
- I'm gonna kill him.
209
00:07:28,124 --> 00:07:31,727
I'm gonna punch him in his
rich, old white dude face.
210
00:07:32,294 --> 00:07:33,295
Not you.
211
00:07:33,863 --> 00:07:35,163
Joe Napoli.
212
00:07:35,231 --> 00:07:37,032
So I guess you
didn't get the job?
213
00:07:37,100 --> 00:07:39,601
No, I got the job.
And that's the problem.
214
00:07:39,669 --> 00:07:43,437
I want six shakes in my fridge
at all times, ready to go.
215
00:07:43,505 --> 00:07:45,106
And I want it Beyoncé-colored.
216
00:07:45,174 --> 00:07:46,941
Not darker, not lighter.
217
00:07:47,709 --> 00:07:49,277
Beyoncé!
218
00:07:51,046 --> 00:07:53,281
Clean your damn desk!
219
00:07:53,349 --> 00:07:54,615
Don't let him see you cry.
220
00:07:56,784 --> 00:07:58,218
See, I want to kill him.
221
00:07:58,286 --> 00:08:00,287
Russ, I was wondering
if later, if you had a minute,
222
00:08:00,355 --> 00:08:02,155
if you wouldn't mind taking
a look at my Idea Notebook.
223
00:08:02,723 --> 00:08:05,225
- Um... Hold that thought.
- I will hold it.
224
00:08:05,293 --> 00:08:07,127
Hold that thought 'cause he
doesn't want to hear it, Nick.
225
00:08:07,195 --> 00:08:08,595
Those ideas were 51% mine.
226
00:08:11,164 --> 00:08:13,232
I got it, I got it!
Russell, move, my man.
227
00:08:13,300 --> 00:08:14,666
What'd I do?
228
00:08:14,734 --> 00:08:16,302
No, you did nothing, my man.
Don't blame yourself.
229
00:08:19,539 --> 00:08:21,107
Yah! It just fights back
a little bit, Russ.
230
00:08:23,642 --> 00:08:24,710
Anchor me! Anchor me!
231
00:08:24,778 --> 00:08:26,645
It's choking me!
Come on. Go, go, go!
232
00:08:26,713 --> 00:08:29,480
Come on!
233
00:08:29,548 --> 00:08:32,250
- Anchor me. Don't grope me.
- Jess, get in there!
234
00:08:32,318 --> 00:08:33,785
Jess!
235
00:08:33,852 --> 00:08:34,852
One more big one!
236
00:08:36,222 --> 00:08:39,391
Oh, my God. Sorry.
237
00:08:40,058 --> 00:08:41,092
You guys,
238
00:08:41,160 --> 00:08:43,094
my contractor knows a really great plumber.
- Please.
239
00:08:43,162 --> 00:08:45,930
- I know the best plumbers in the business.
- White guy knows a plumber.
240
00:08:45,997 --> 00:08:48,265
Sorry. Plumbing's, like, a really
sensitive topic around here.
241
00:08:48,333 --> 00:08:49,366
I-I didn't know.
242
00:08:49,434 --> 00:08:51,268
I mean, who would?
243
00:08:52,336 --> 00:08:53,337
Um...
244
00:08:53,905 --> 00:08:55,406
hey...
245
00:08:55,473 --> 00:08:57,541
who wants to play
True American?
246
00:08:57,608 --> 00:08:59,476
- I'm in.
- That sounds like a great idea.
247
00:09:00,044 --> 00:09:00,776
So it's 50%
248
00:09:00,844 --> 00:09:03,479
drinking game,
50% life-size Candyland.
249
00:09:03,547 --> 00:09:04,713
Well, it's more
like 75 drinking,
250
00:09:04,781 --> 00:09:06,682
20 Candyland, and by the way,
251
00:09:06,750 --> 00:09:09,118
- the floor is molten lava.
- It's actually 90% drinking,
252
00:09:09,186 --> 00:09:11,787
and it's got a loose
Candyland-like structure to it.
253
00:09:11,855 --> 00:09:13,656
- Well, with steaks.
- Hey, guys, we doing teams?
254
00:09:13,723 --> 00:09:15,558
- Yeah.
- Ready?
255
00:09:15,625 --> 00:09:17,693
One, two, three, go.
256
00:09:17,761 --> 00:09:20,763
- Two, two, four.
- Wow, I'm with Russell. Perfect.
257
00:09:20,831 --> 00:09:23,398
- What? You don't want to be on my team?
- Well, I just copied you.
258
00:09:23,467 --> 00:09:24,815
You haven't given me
any information yet.
259
00:09:24,816 --> 00:09:25,200
Oh, okay.
260
00:09:25,268 --> 00:09:26,368
So it starts off there are
261
00:09:26,436 --> 00:09:27,736
four zones.
An alternate zone
262
00:09:27,804 --> 00:09:29,071
is a crazy zone.
263
00:09:29,138 --> 00:09:30,305
And there's a trail of chairs.
264
00:09:30,373 --> 00:09:31,774
But the floor is lava.
265
00:09:31,842 --> 00:09:33,074
These are the pawns.
They're the soldiers
266
00:09:33,141 --> 00:09:34,041
of the secret order.
267
00:09:34,109 --> 00:09:35,710
This is the king of the castle.
268
00:09:35,778 --> 00:09:37,678
And remember, everything
you hear in True American
269
00:09:37,745 --> 00:09:39,380
is a lie, knock on wood.
270
00:09:39,448 --> 00:09:40,782
And it starts
with a shotgun tip-off,
271
00:09:40,850 --> 00:09:43,250
- okay?
- Oh, that I can do.
272
00:09:43,318 --> 00:09:45,119
Shotgun, for sure.
273
00:09:45,187 --> 00:09:46,588
Oh, yeah!
274
00:09:46,655 --> 00:09:47,622
All right! Yeah!
275
00:09:47,690 --> 00:09:49,389
Yeah! Yes!
276
00:09:49,457 --> 00:09:51,592
Yeah, there's no going back now.
277
00:09:51,659 --> 00:09:53,393
One, two, three, four, JFK!
278
00:09:53,461 --> 00:09:55,195
FDR! Up, up, up!
FDR!
279
00:09:59,166 --> 00:10:00,767
Russell, you're
in the lava, man.
280
00:10:00,835 --> 00:10:02,736
I don't understand.
Abe Lincoln, George Washington.
281
00:10:02,804 --> 00:10:04,037
Cherry tree!
282
00:10:05,772 --> 00:10:07,106
All right, Americans,
283
00:10:07,173 --> 00:10:08,541
you ready?
Let's do the count.
284
00:10:08,609 --> 00:10:10,776
One, two, three.
285
00:10:14,414 --> 00:10:15,447
That's me!
286
00:10:16,984 --> 00:10:19,785
Okay, remember:
The ground is lava.
287
00:10:19,853 --> 00:10:22,687
Russell! Russell!
288
00:10:22,755 --> 00:10:26,090
Don't touch the lava.
289
00:10:26,158 --> 00:10:27,291
Big R!
290
00:10:27,359 --> 00:10:29,794
Only thing we have to fear
291
00:10:29,862 --> 00:10:30,962
Is fear itself!
292
00:10:31,030 --> 00:10:32,998
- Drink!
- Drink!
293
00:10:39,103 --> 00:10:41,038
Jimmy Carter... atop...
294
00:10:41,605 --> 00:10:43,541
Grover Cleveland.
295
00:10:43,608 --> 00:10:44,742
What now?
296
00:10:44,809 --> 00:10:45,976
- More beer.
- More beer.
297
00:10:47,478 --> 00:10:49,312
I got to get to the castle!
298
00:10:49,380 --> 00:10:50,848
- Go, Nick, go!
- Russell, you're kind of
299
00:10:50,916 --> 00:10:51,949
ripped up, huh?
300
00:10:52,017 --> 00:10:53,683
Well, I used to work summers
301
00:10:53,751 --> 00:10:56,586
in a lumber camp near Banff,
and I still split my own wood.
302
00:10:56,654 --> 00:10:57,820
JFK!
FDR!
303
00:11:01,859 --> 00:11:03,026
You're pretty good
at this, old-timer.
304
00:11:03,093 --> 00:11:04,727
Ooh, ooh, Cece,
305
00:11:04,795 --> 00:11:06,395
this is the best game
of True American ever.
306
00:11:06,463 --> 00:11:07,564
I'm this close to winning.
307
00:11:07,631 --> 00:11:09,565
I'm gonna go get in your bed.
308
00:11:09,632 --> 00:11:10,498
Damn.
309
00:11:10,567 --> 00:11:11,934
Yeah, I'm out.
310
00:11:12,001 --> 00:11:12,901
Schmidt, no!
311
00:11:12,969 --> 00:11:16,471
- No!
- Does it mean we win?
312
00:11:16,539 --> 00:11:17,906
- Yes, we win!
- Whoo!
313
00:11:21,911 --> 00:11:24,179
USA! USA!
314
00:11:24,246 --> 00:11:25,580
Oh, a little bit. Ah!
315
00:11:25,647 --> 00:11:27,682
USA! USA!
316
00:11:29,451 --> 00:11:30,885
I'm trashed.
317
00:11:30,953 --> 00:11:32,620
I'm in a trash bag right now.
318
00:11:32,688 --> 00:11:34,589
- It's true.
- I think we should
319
00:11:34,656 --> 00:11:35,690
call it a night.
320
00:11:35,757 --> 00:11:36,824
No, no, hang on.
321
00:11:36,892 --> 00:11:38,826
I was, I was saying something.
322
00:11:38,894 --> 00:11:40,494
What you was saying to me.
I remember.
323
00:11:40,562 --> 00:11:42,361
Hey, guys, guys?
I'm really sorry.
324
00:11:42,429 --> 00:11:43,529
I'm on a water break.
325
00:11:43,598 --> 00:11:44,698
It's over here.
326
00:11:44,765 --> 00:11:46,165
Oh, man, you were
327
00:11:46,233 --> 00:11:47,867
giving me advice on my boss
because
328
00:11:47,935 --> 00:11:51,738
you are also a rich white man.
And that's okay.
329
00:11:51,806 --> 00:11:52,739
Hell, yeah, I am!
330
00:11:54,174 --> 00:11:57,175
Hey, I love ya.
. Russell, we have a big day
331
00:11:57,176 --> 00:11:58,510
planned tomorrow,
so maybe we should...
332
00:11:58,578 --> 00:12:00,178
Shh-shh, hang on a sec.
333
00:12:00,246 --> 00:12:01,513
Let me straighten you out.
334
00:12:01,581 --> 00:12:02,680
Here's what you do.
335
00:12:02,848 --> 00:12:04,483
Your boss is power-playing you.
336
00:12:05,550 --> 00:12:07,752
So you need
to power-play him back.
337
00:12:07,820 --> 00:12:09,354
- Yes.
- How do I do that?
338
00:12:10,922 --> 00:12:12,690
Dip your boys in his shake.
339
00:12:12,758 --> 00:12:13,557
What?!
340
00:12:13,558 --> 00:12:14,592
That's all you gotta do.
341
00:12:14,660 --> 00:12:15,693
Your testicles, dip 'em in,
342
00:12:15,761 --> 00:12:16,995
wring em out, dip it again
343
00:12:17,062 --> 00:12:18,429
and give him his shake.
That's how you do it.
344
00:12:18,497 --> 00:12:19,463
That's a terrible idea.
345
00:12:19,531 --> 00:12:21,065
Jess, no, no. Shh.
346
00:12:21,133 --> 00:12:22,366
Hang on. It's like a guy thing.
347
00:12:22,434 --> 00:12:24,002
Territory. Jess, you don't know.
348
00:12:24,069 --> 00:12:25,202
It's a guy thing, you know?
349
00:12:25,270 --> 00:12:26,771
Jess doesn't get it.
It's a territory...
350
00:12:26,839 --> 00:12:28,539
- Stop copying Russell.
- I'm not copying him. I love him.
351
00:12:28,607 --> 00:12:30,206
Classic is a classic,
you know what I mean?
352
00:12:30,274 --> 00:12:32,342
Just get in there,
dunk your nuggets in his shake!
353
00:12:32,409 --> 00:12:33,610
That's what I'm talking about.
354
00:12:33,678 --> 00:12:35,112
Well, we all learned a lot.
355
00:12:35,179 --> 00:12:37,080
You know what would make
this night really great?
356
00:12:37,448 --> 00:12:38,649
- Idea Notebook.
- Sleep.
357
00:12:39,216 --> 00:12:40,050
Yeah?
358
00:12:40,118 --> 00:12:43,586
Have you ever wanted to take
a ride on a magic idea?
359
00:12:43,655 --> 00:12:44,787
Well, strap on, Russell.
360
00:12:44,855 --> 00:12:46,321
Russell, let's go to sleep.
361
00:12:46,389 --> 00:12:47,823
I'll be in in a second.
362
00:12:47,891 --> 00:12:50,159
I want to hear your idea.
363
00:12:50,226 --> 00:12:51,560
Take one more of these,
364
00:12:51,628 --> 00:12:53,328
and then this idea's
gonna be even better.
365
00:12:53,396 --> 00:12:54,764
- Okay.
- Down the hatch!
366
00:12:58,034 --> 00:12:59,501
Let's have a little
bit more of that.
367
00:13:01,840 --> 00:13:04,876
I'm mad at him, and I've never
been mad at him before.
368
00:13:04,943 --> 00:13:07,144
Oh, Jess!
369
00:13:07,212 --> 00:13:09,546
This room is not a place
of comforting, okay?
370
00:13:09,614 --> 00:13:11,015
This is Darwin's jungle,
371
00:13:11,083 --> 00:13:12,616
where open-minded people do
372
00:13:12,684 --> 00:13:14,352
weird things to each other.
373
00:13:14,419 --> 00:13:15,652
Go away.
374
00:13:17,588 --> 00:13:18,821
Yeah.
375
00:13:18,890 --> 00:13:20,423
I can't fight with him.
376
00:13:20,491 --> 00:13:22,125
That's our thing.
We don't fight.
377
00:13:22,193 --> 00:13:24,427
He used to fight all the time
with his ex-wife.
378
00:13:24,495 --> 00:13:25,962
I think he likes
that we're peaceful.
379
00:13:26,030 --> 00:13:28,298
Fighting's good. It's healthy.
380
00:13:28,366 --> 00:13:30,133
It's how you know it's working.
381
00:13:30,201 --> 00:13:33,402
You know, Jess, what Cece
and I like to do
382
00:13:33,469 --> 00:13:35,637
is we like to fight
with our bodies.
383
00:13:35,705 --> 00:13:37,839
It's like very intense game
of Capture the Flag.
384
00:13:37,908 --> 00:13:39,574
I won't make you guess
what the flag is.
385
00:13:40,877 --> 00:13:42,111
As my financial business
partner,
386
00:13:42,178 --> 00:13:43,913
I appreciate you
taking the time.
387
00:13:43,980 --> 00:13:45,847
All right, Russell said
we need a prototype.
388
00:13:45,916 --> 00:13:49,517
So, Mr. Schmidt, I now present
you "Real Apps."
389
00:13:49,584 --> 00:13:51,685
The phone obviously goes back
here where the phone goes,
390
00:13:51,753 --> 00:13:53,521
and then these are all the apps.
391
00:13:53,588 --> 00:13:55,089
You've got a Zippo.
You've got a fork.
392
00:13:55,157 --> 00:13:56,124
You've got a spoon.
393
00:13:56,191 --> 00:13:57,525
That's a corn holder.
394
00:13:58,092 --> 00:13:59,727
It's also a gentleman's shiv.
395
00:13:59,795 --> 00:14:01,930
Nick, it's a prototype
of a prototype at best.
396
00:14:02,195 --> 00:14:03,230
- Let me see it.
- No.
397
00:14:03,231 --> 00:14:04,831
- Don't be mean about it.
- Come on, let me see it.
398
00:14:04,899 --> 00:14:06,181
- You got a bottle opener.
- Come on.
399
00:14:06,182 --> 00:14:07,534
- Yeah.
- Look at this.
400
00:14:07,601 --> 00:14:09,536
There's no brushed steel,
no nickel.
401
00:14:09,603 --> 00:14:11,371
I mean, it's got none
of the baller metals.
402
00:14:11,439 --> 00:14:13,106
I mean, come on, man.
403
00:14:13,174 --> 00:14:15,508
I'm not gonna get Winkelvossed
because of your sloppiness.
404
00:14:15,576 --> 00:14:17,911
What do you mean, "I"?
Real Apps is my idea.
405
00:14:17,979 --> 00:14:19,512
You just came up with the name!
406
00:14:19,580 --> 00:14:21,647
Yeah, and the name
is the game, friendo.
407
00:14:21,714 --> 00:14:22,949
- Mm-mm.
- Yes, it is, man.
408
00:14:23,016 --> 00:14:24,716
No, it isn't.
No, it isn't, man.
409
00:14:24,784 --> 00:14:26,352
Would you line up
around the corner
410
00:14:26,420 --> 00:14:28,254
if they called the iPhone
a "slippery germ brick"?
411
00:14:28,322 --> 00:14:29,488
Yeah, actually, I might.
412
00:14:29,556 --> 00:14:31,023
That's why they call it
basketball
413
00:14:31,091 --> 00:14:32,124
and not "peach basket
catch-it-up."
414
00:14:32,692 --> 00:14:34,260
You just came up with that?
415
00:14:34,328 --> 00:14:36,894
Hey, hey, we're back here on
the Joe Napoli Show, and let me
416
00:14:36,963 --> 00:14:39,197
introduce you to a new member
of the Joe Napoli Show family,
417
00:14:39,265 --> 00:14:41,499
and that is Winston Bishop,
who is our new assistant.
418
00:14:41,567 --> 00:14:43,134
I'll tell you what--
he's sharp as a tack.
419
00:14:43,202 --> 00:14:44,502
Ladies, there's no ring
on his finger,
420
00:14:44,570 --> 00:14:45,670
and, Winston,
why don't you tell us
421
00:14:45,737 --> 00:14:46,771
just a little bit
about yourself?
422
00:14:46,839 --> 00:14:47,905
Hey, thanks, a lot, Joe.
423
00:14:47,974 --> 00:14:49,474
I really want
to tell you about myself.
424
00:14:49,541 --> 00:14:51,009
You know, I been
on the job two days,
425
00:14:51,077 --> 00:14:52,843
and I don't know how
to make no milk shake.
426
00:14:52,910 --> 00:14:54,618
Oh, and I played two years of
mediocre Division I basketball.
427
00:14:54,619 --> 00:14:55,045
Wow.
428
00:14:55,113 --> 00:14:56,280
And why was that?
429
00:14:56,348 --> 00:14:57,815
Well, because I really didn't
know how to play basketball.
430
00:14:57,883 --> 00:14:59,816
I got recruited
for a girls' volleyball team.
431
00:14:59,884 --> 00:15:02,119
All right, there he is.
That's Winston Bishop.
432
00:15:02,187 --> 00:15:04,021
And we'll see you again
probably never.
433
00:15:04,089 --> 00:15:05,289
All right, turning now
to the NBA picture,
434
00:15:05,357 --> 00:15:06,656
it looks like the West...
435
00:15:08,258 --> 00:15:09,525
These are hangover eggs.
436
00:15:09,593 --> 00:15:11,194
See, they'll either stop you
437
00:15:11,261 --> 00:15:12,695
from throwing up
the rest of the day
438
00:15:12,762 --> 00:15:14,197
or you'll just throw it
up really fast.
439
00:15:14,264 --> 00:15:15,431
It's high-risk, high-reward.
440
00:15:15,499 --> 00:15:17,233
Oh, maybe I should just go
back to bed.
441
00:15:17,301 --> 00:15:19,135
I have a really nice
day planned for us.
442
00:15:19,203 --> 00:15:20,636
We're gonna go apple picking...
443
00:15:20,704 --> 00:15:23,806
I don't... I don't pick apples.
444
00:15:23,874 --> 00:15:25,807
That... that's...
that's not gonna happen.
445
00:15:25,875 --> 00:15:27,409
Are you serious?
446
00:15:27,477 --> 00:15:31,113
Because it's picking
and it's apple...
447
00:15:31,180 --> 00:15:31,980
You're serious?
448
00:15:32,048 --> 00:15:33,482
That literally sounds like hell.
449
00:15:33,549 --> 00:15:35,384
Okay.
450
00:15:35,451 --> 00:15:36,251
Are we in a fight?
451
00:15:36,319 --> 00:15:37,152
We're not fighting.
452
00:15:37,220 --> 00:15:38,453
This feels like a fight, Jess.
453
00:15:38,521 --> 00:15:39,888
This is not a fight!
454
00:15:42,457 --> 00:15:44,158
Russell, my man,
it seems these days
455
00:15:44,226 --> 00:15:46,460
there's an app for everything.
456
00:15:46,528 --> 00:15:47,528
Doesn't it, though?
457
00:15:47,595 --> 00:15:49,430
Yeah, but there isn't.
458
00:15:49,498 --> 00:15:51,499
Let's say I'm out
and about, you know,
459
00:15:51,566 --> 00:15:54,768
being mobile, and I
want to cut a bagel,
460
00:15:54,836 --> 00:15:55,836
cobble a shoe.
461
00:15:55,904 --> 00:15:57,270
Haberdash on the fly.
462
00:15:57,338 --> 00:15:58,638
Is there an app for that?
463
00:15:58,705 --> 00:15:59,272
No.
Is there?
464
00:15:59,340 --> 00:16:00,940
Until now.
465
00:16:01,208 --> 00:16:03,510
- Right.
- We now present to you...
466
00:16:04,577 --> 00:16:05,845
Real Apps!
Real Apps!
467
00:16:05,913 --> 00:16:06,612
The prototype.
468
00:16:06,680 --> 00:16:09,149
Hmm, hmm, hmm.
469
00:16:09,216 --> 00:16:10,150
Relapse?
470
00:16:10,217 --> 00:16:11,518
Real Apps.
471
00:16:11,585 --> 00:16:12,851
Real Apps.
472
00:16:12,919 --> 00:16:13,752
Relapse?
473
00:16:16,955 --> 00:16:18,156
Relapse?!
474
00:16:18,424 --> 00:16:19,091
Would you calm...?
475
00:16:19,159 --> 00:16:20,992
You called my baby "relapse"?!
476
00:16:20,993 --> 00:16:22,794
No, I didn't call
it anything. Just calm down!
477
00:16:22,862 --> 00:16:23,962
- I gave you 51% of this for Relapse?
- Russell. Russell. Enough.
478
00:16:24,462 --> 00:16:25,462
Russell...
479
00:16:25,930 --> 00:16:27,198
Hold it in your hands, my man.
480
00:16:27,199 --> 00:16:29,233
- We're in the middle of something, guys.
- No, no, no.
481
00:16:29,301 --> 00:16:29,985
We're great. We're fine.
Show it to him, Schmidt.
482
00:16:29,986 --> 00:16:30,668
It's all right here.
483
00:16:30,735 --> 00:16:32,736
- Let me show it to you.
- Yeah, but you have to...
484
00:16:32,804 --> 00:16:33,804
- I want to... Russell.
- You're going the wrong way.
485
00:16:33,872 --> 00:16:36,574
Aah! Oh! Oh, oh, no!
486
00:16:36,641 --> 00:16:38,008
- Oh, my God, Russell, are you okay?
- No, no, no.
487
00:16:38,077 --> 00:16:39,210
I've been stabbed!
488
00:16:39,278 --> 00:16:40,578
It wasn't ready.
489
00:16:40,645 --> 00:16:42,113
- It wasn't ready.
- You called it Relapse, idiot!
490
00:16:42,181 --> 00:16:43,181
Where are the Band-Aids?
491
00:16:43,248 --> 00:16:44,147
- No Band-Aids!
- What?!
492
00:16:44,215 --> 00:16:46,015
Ow!
493
00:16:46,084 --> 00:16:47,584
I'll get you a takeout napkin
with some Scotch tape.
494
00:16:47,651 --> 00:16:48,552
Searing pain!
495
00:16:48,619 --> 00:16:49,786
So sorry.
496
00:16:49,853 --> 00:16:52,089
Here. Oh, sorry.
Ow! Ow! Jess.
497
00:16:52,156 --> 00:16:53,557
Jess, do you know what? You just
taped a napkin to my hand.
498
00:16:53,624 --> 00:16:54,558
You know what?
I'm gonna go.
499
00:16:54,625 --> 00:16:55,792
I need to be home right now.
500
00:16:55,859 --> 00:16:56,859
Is that a problem?
501
00:16:56,927 --> 00:16:58,528
No.
502
00:16:58,596 --> 00:17:00,029
I'm fine.
503
00:17:00,097 --> 00:17:01,597
It's great.
504
00:17:02,164 --> 00:17:03,799
We're great.
505
00:17:04,866 --> 00:17:05,767
Yeah.
506
00:17:08,205 --> 00:17:09,938
- I'm s...
- Just nicked him.
507
00:17:14,410 --> 00:17:15,711
Get it all out.
508
00:17:15,778 --> 00:17:17,044
I have an idea
for your Idea book!
509
00:17:17,113 --> 00:17:18,413
Replace the Band-Aids!
510
00:17:18,981 --> 00:17:19,947
Very fair.
511
00:17:20,515 --> 00:17:21,182
It's so sticky!
512
00:17:21,250 --> 00:17:22,150
Oh, I have an app for that.
513
00:17:24,114 --> 00:17:25,480
What are you doing here?
514
00:17:25,548 --> 00:17:27,382
Why aren't you at your new job?
515
00:17:28,450 --> 00:17:29,583
I'm quitting.
516
00:17:29,651 --> 00:17:31,418
You're quitting your dream job?
517
00:17:31,486 --> 00:17:32,819
Well, I mean,
there's good news.
518
00:17:32,887 --> 00:17:34,288
I want to keep
being your nanny.
519
00:17:34,356 --> 00:17:35,589
That's what I've come
to tell your mom.
520
00:17:36,157 --> 00:17:38,292
I can't let you do that.
521
00:17:38,360 --> 00:17:40,060
Mom? Mom?
522
00:17:40,128 --> 00:17:42,094
Winston just asked me
if he can smoke weed.
523
00:17:42,162 --> 00:17:43,563
- What?!
- What?!
524
00:17:43,631 --> 00:17:45,365
- No, see...
- He said when we go to the park,
525
00:17:45,432 --> 00:17:46,432
he wanted to do it.
526
00:17:46,500 --> 00:17:47,433
And I get to hold it
527
00:17:47,501 --> 00:17:48,301
because
528
00:17:48,369 --> 00:17:50,270
I'm a minor.
529
00:17:50,337 --> 00:17:52,305
Where is your imagination
taking you? No!
530
00:17:52,373 --> 00:17:53,806
- You said that in front of my kid?!
- Gina...
531
00:17:53,874 --> 00:17:55,074
Are you serious?!
532
00:17:55,141 --> 00:17:56,842
Are you completely insane?!
533
00:17:56,910 --> 00:17:58,310
Gina, you know me, okay?
534
00:17:58,378 --> 00:17:59,145
I'm wearing a tie
and everything.
535
00:17:59,212 --> 00:18:00,545
You're never, ever
gonna nanny again.
536
00:18:00,613 --> 00:18:03,215
I will destroy you
on the nanny boards.
537
00:18:03,283 --> 00:18:04,984
You can count on that.
Come on, Elvin. Just...
538
00:18:05,051 --> 00:18:07,786
Let me explain. Let me...
Elvin, Elvin, Elvin, hey, now.
539
00:18:07,853 --> 00:18:09,053
Elvin, let's get away.
Get away from the hippie.
540
00:18:09,121 --> 00:18:10,323
Come on.
541
00:18:13,292 --> 00:18:14,858
Bye, Winston.
542
00:18:17,895 --> 00:18:18,763
Bye, Elvin.
543
00:18:18,764 --> 00:18:20,431
No, no, don't talk to him.
544
00:18:20,499 --> 00:18:23,200
It's 4:20. Don't you
have to be somewhere?
545
00:18:24,603 --> 00:18:26,337
Oh, no.
546
00:18:26,905 --> 00:18:27,905
The shakes.
547
00:18:28,172 --> 00:18:31,205
Six... Where are you,
number six?
548
00:18:31,207 --> 00:18:33,008
Hey, Bishop, I
thought you left early.
549
00:18:33,075 --> 00:18:34,875
Assumed you weren't
coming back.
550
00:18:35,443 --> 00:18:36,444
There was something wrong
with the shakes,
551
00:18:37,012 --> 00:18:38,013
so I went in and just
552
00:18:38,014 --> 00:18:40,349
threw them out because there's
something wrong with 'em.
553
00:18:40,350 --> 00:18:41,984
Speaking of which, I should
probably go ahead and throw
554
00:18:41,985 --> 00:18:43,453
that one out.
What did you do to the shakes?
555
00:18:45,021 --> 00:18:46,322
They've been compromised.
556
00:18:46,389 --> 00:18:49,025
What... did... you... do?
557
00:18:49,092 --> 00:18:51,560
Look, I really, really want
this job, Mr. Napoli, and
558
00:18:52,128 --> 00:18:54,496
I know you're going to fire me
if I tell you what I did,
559
00:18:54,564 --> 00:18:56,231
but I would love a future here,
560
00:18:56,299 --> 00:18:58,166
and I don't want that
to be jeopardized
561
00:18:58,234 --> 00:19:00,902
by a moment of...
poor judgment.
562
00:19:03,972 --> 00:19:06,607
I put my beans in your shakes.
563
00:19:07,175 --> 00:19:08,376
Yeah, and I...
564
00:19:08,844 --> 00:19:10,945
I shook it around
a little bit like this.
565
00:19:11,512 --> 00:19:14,915
In there? You stuck 'em down
in there, huh?
566
00:19:14,983 --> 00:19:16,317
I did.
567
00:19:22,056 --> 00:19:23,389
Oh, man!
568
00:19:27,127 --> 00:19:28,461
You know what we're gonna do?
569
00:19:28,528 --> 00:19:30,129
We're gonna do that to Kareem.
570
00:19:42,241 --> 00:19:43,075
Hi.
571
00:19:43,242 --> 00:19:44,943
Hi.
572
00:19:45,011 --> 00:19:46,579
I have something to say to you.
573
00:19:46,646 --> 00:19:48,647
- You don't have to apologize.
- Well, I'm not here to apologize.
574
00:19:48,648 --> 00:19:50,749
I'm here to fight with
you, and I don't care
575
00:19:50,750 --> 00:19:52,584
- if you want to fight or not.
- All right, let's fight.
576
00:19:52,585 --> 00:19:54,853
Well, I was prepared to have a
perfectly nice weekend with you,
577
00:19:54,920 --> 00:19:56,888
and you just give up,
and you come home.
578
00:19:56,955 --> 00:19:59,590
Because I was bleeding from
my hand. I had to go to the ER.
579
00:19:59,657 --> 00:20:01,892
- I had to get a stitch.
- Ooh, stitches.
580
00:20:01,959 --> 00:20:04,094
I'm too fancy for a Band-Aid.
581
00:20:04,161 --> 00:20:07,798
I'm actually... I'm actually
really sorry about that.
582
00:20:07,866 --> 00:20:09,600
Jess, I haven't played
a drinking game in ten years.
583
00:20:09,667 --> 00:20:11,402
The only reason I did is
'cause you asked me to.
584
00:20:11,469 --> 00:20:13,303
If I want to have a drink,
585
00:20:13,371 --> 00:20:15,171
I don't really have to play
a game while I'm doing it.
586
00:20:15,239 --> 00:20:17,040
Well, that's my world.
Garbage disposals don't work.
587
00:20:17,108 --> 00:20:19,175
Elevators don't pass inspection.
588
00:20:19,243 --> 00:20:21,344
- Wait. I didn't know about the elevator.
- Yeah, it was, like,
589
00:20:21,412 --> 00:20:24,214
the cables were really thin.
We signed a waiver.
590
00:20:24,282 --> 00:20:26,016
- They took 100 bucks off our rent.
- That's really not safe!
591
00:20:26,083 --> 00:20:28,451
Well, that's where I live,
and those are my friends.
592
00:20:28,519 --> 00:20:31,185
And that wasn't even the
first stabbing this month.
593
00:20:31,753 --> 00:20:34,756
And Russell, my life is just
as important as your life.
594
00:20:35,324 --> 00:20:36,392
And if you want to get with me,
595
00:20:36,459 --> 00:20:37,960
you're gonna have to
get with my friends,
596
00:20:38,028 --> 00:20:39,428
and that is a Spice Girls song.
597
00:20:46,467 --> 00:20:47,501
We just had a fight.
598
00:20:48,569 --> 00:20:50,571
- I won.
- You did not win.
599
00:20:50,639 --> 00:20:52,040
Hey, tell you what.
Let's just go back
600
00:20:52,107 --> 00:20:53,408
to your loft and try again.
601
00:20:53,975 --> 00:20:54,809
Let's just hang out.
602
00:20:54,876 --> 00:20:56,144
Oh. Now?
603
00:20:56,711 --> 00:20:59,580
I mean... I just got here.
604
00:20:59,848 --> 00:21:00,714
Maybe later.
605
00:21:02,617 --> 00:21:05,118
Okay, that sounds like a plan.
606
00:21:05,686 --> 00:21:07,787
Those boxers you borrowed--
I'm gonna need them back.
607
00:21:07,855 --> 00:21:09,990
- They're my lucky underpants.
- Lucky underpants?
608
00:21:10,558 --> 00:21:13,193
And what are the values
of the Olympic games?
609
00:21:13,961 --> 00:21:16,330
Openness, exchange.
610
00:21:17,097 --> 00:21:20,266
The first victims of an
authoritarian security regime.
611
00:21:20,834 --> 00:21:24,869
I'm Kareem Abdul Jabbar, and
that's The View from Up Here.
612
00:21:29,837 --> 00:21:34,107
Sync by Alice | www.addic7ed.com