[jazz music]
♪♪♪
[cheers and applause]
- PENN: From the Penn & Teller Theater
at the Rio Hotel in Las Vegas,
here's our host, Brooke Burke.
[cheers and applause]
♪♪♪
- Welcome to "Fool Us," everyone.
I'm so excited to be here,
and I hope that Penn and Teller are prepared for a workout
because tonight's performers are ready
to flex their magical muscle,
and maybe they can make the stars of our show
feel the burn.
Now take a deep breath and give me ten reps of applause
as we welcome two of the fittest minds in magic,
Penn and Teller.
[cheers and applause]
♪♪♪
Penn and Teller have a slot in their world famous magic show
and a fancy "Fool Us" trophy to offer
any magician who fools them.
Our first magician just might take them up on that offer.
Let's meet them.
- I'm Jeffrey Wang from Beijing, China.
I've been doing magic since childhood.
I perform all kinds of magic,
but my specialty is coin magic.
I didn't choose it. It chose me.
When I'd invent tricks with other objects,
I'd find out that someone else has already done them.
But when I design a coin effect,
it's easier for me to be original.
I'm one of the founders of the Magic Club
at the University of Southern California.
Going to school in Los Angeles has been great
for my magic career and is close to Las Vegas.
A few years ago, I met Penn and Teller
and seemed to amaze them with the trick.
Now it's time to try and fool them again
in front of the world.
Penn, Teller, remember me?
I'm back, and I've got something brand new.
[applause]
- Let's see if you can make heads or tails
of Jeffrey Wang.
[applause] - Hello, hello.
Nice to meet you. Please take a seat.
- You too. Thank you. - Please take a seat.
Okay. Hello, everybody. My name is Jeffrey Wang.
Super glad to be here.
Brooke, you ever see a lot of magic trick?
- Yes. -Okay, have a question for you.
Which side of the card box is the face of the card box?
- This one. - This one?
- Yes. - Why?
- Because the numbers are on that side.
- Uh, you know what?
It's a very weird question. You know what?
My card is easy to tell which side
is the face because
it has my face.
- That makes sense.
- Yeah, look at this.
Look closer. Look at this.
Just kidding. Okay.
So, you like card tricks? - I do.
- Sorry, I do coin trick only,
so I'll do a coin trick for you, okay?
- Okay.
- Cool. Let's do a coin trick.
Okay. I'll put this back.
Cool. Your left hand face up.
Please. Thank you so much.
Do me a favor.
Just hold on to the coin...
in my left hand, okay?
- Okay. - In my left hand, this way.
[laughs]
Hold on to it. Yes. - Okay.
- You can see I have a marker
right here. - Yes.
- Do you know which side of the coin
is the face of the coin? - Heads.
- This one? - I think so.
- Okay, try to initial on the face of the coin
using the marker in my left hand.
- [laughs] Okay.
- Yeah, try to initial on it. - Okay.
How's that? - Beautiful. And show it
to the camera right there. - Okay.
- I'm also going to write my initial on the back like this.
So we just mark this coin, a very unique coin.
So this is her signature and this is my signature.
Okay? - Yeah.
- Okay. Now I don't need a Sharpie.
Now, still, I want you to hold out your left hand like this.
I want to show you the moment I can transfer
an object from one hand to the other.
Okay? - Okay.
- I'm going to toss the coin into your hand.
You're gonna catch it, okay? - I'm going to catch it.
- Yes. One, two, three.
- [audience gasps] - Troubles.
[applause]
And this is our signature, yes?
- Yes.
- You see it? - I do.
- Signature.
Now do the holding one more time, okay?
This time I'll put on the back of my hand.
More difficult, okay?
- Okay. - Your hand, your hand.
Like this. One, two, three.
[applause] - Wow. Wow! What?
- Still go to the left.
Do you want to know how to do it?
- I do. - Yeah? I will show you
because I can do that in two parts.
The first part, I can put the coin
into the hand like this.
And right here, I can put the coin...
[pops lips] into the air.
[audience gasps, applause]
Okay. It's right here.
Okay. Second part, second part.
I can take the coin out from anywhere I want.
Point to anywhere.
- Okay. - Yeah, anywhere, point to.
Here. Right here.
Right here. Do you see the coin?
There's going to be a coin in my hand.
Appears, um...
Not yet. Okay, another point. Anywhere.
Here. Okay, take it.
There's going to be a coin.
Appear. Uh...
Sorry. It's my first time on "Fool Us."
I'm a little bit nervous.
I don't know where the coin goes.
Where is it?
Do you see it? No? - I don't see it.
- Where is it?
[laughter]
- No way. [applause]
- What?
Oh, on my back? Right there?
Oh, okay. Let me take it off.
The coin.
Let me peel off the tape for you,
and this is our signed coin.
Yes? - It is, yes.
- Thank you.
[applause]
Okay, you know what?
I made a little mistake,
so let's try it one more time.
Okay? - Okay.
- Come closer. Look at this.
Do you see the coin?
With the signature? - Yes.
- I close my hand. I give a wave.
[blows on fingers]
AUDIENCE: Whoa!
[applause] - Wow.
- It's gone.
Where is it? - I don't know.
- Have a guess. - On your back?
- Do you see it? - No.
- No?
So weird. Let's try something like this.
Okay? - Okay.
- Gonna I take off my jacket. - Okay.
Need help? - Ooh.
You can see right here.
Oh, there's nothing. It's just right here.
[laughter]
[applause]
Okay. You know what?
This is a coin, yes? - Yes.
- Okay, check it.
Show to the camera and I will try a last thing for you.
Okay? This time I'm going to stand on your right.
Yes. Can I have the coin? - Yes.
- I'm gonna take it, I'm gonna stand
on your right side, okay, right here.
- Okay. - Okay.
Do you see the coin? - I do.
- You still see the coin? - I do.
- Yes? Now, look what's in my left hand
right here.
There's going to be a coin... - Wait.
- with the signature. - What?
[audience gasps]
- Empty. [applause]
- How do you do that?
Thank you very much. Thank you so much.
Thank you very much.
- Jeffrey Wang, everyone. Thank you so much.
Oh, my goodness. - Thank you.
- Wow. So, so up close and personal.
- Thank you. - Does that make it
more challenging for you?
- So close is not a big deal.
It's like in front of so many audience,
it's kind of nervous for me.
- You did great. We really enjoyed that. Right, everyone?
[cheers and applause] - Thank you. Thank you.
- Let me ask you, do you have any advice
that you would share for aspiring young magicians?
- Yes. Don't do magic.
[laughter] - Don't do magic?
Why?
- I think, in my opinion,
when I was very young, I see everything's magic.
So I want people to get into magic later
than six, seven years old.
- All right, it's time to go to Penn and Teller.
- Already? - We are ready.
Are you ready? - I'm not ready, but I'm...
- Boys?
We're ready. - Okay.
- Oh, Jeffrey, you know, I want to just ask Brooke.
Brooke, you got the best experience of that of anybody,
and I believe you saw real magic. Is that right?
- I believe I saw real magic, yep.
- Every moment of it was just perfect.
- I have no idea how he did that.
- The stuff you did was just beautiful.
It's the best of that kind of stuff we have ever seen.
When I say "that kind of stuff,"
I gotta backtrack a little bit.
And people watch "Fool Us" for different reasons.
Everybody just watches to see great magic.
Some people, of course, tune in just to see Brooke.
Uh, some people... [laughter]
And some people tune in to try to figure out, uh...
I say certain things in code.
They listen to the puns
and they try to go to the Internet,
and they search every word and every pun,
and they go running down all these angles
to try to find out how the trick was done.
So I give them arrows to Toyland.
I just tell them where to go to find that.
And for those people who watched
that incredible, magical moment between you and Brooke
and want to go to the Internet and search,
I want to say to them, tough [bleep].
I am not giving them a syllable.
There's a technique that you do
that I'm not going to do a pun about,
I'm not going to give a hint about,
but you do it as well as we've ever seen it done,
better than we've ever seen it done.
And it was fabulous. It was truly magical.
They got to see you. They got to see Brooke.
It was a wonderful moment, and...
you didn't fool us. AUDIENCE: Aww!
- You didn't fool them,
but it sounds like they really loved us.
- Yeah. - Jeffrey Wang, everyone.
[applause]
Thank you so much. - Thank you very much.
[applause]
- We gotta take a quick break and set the stage
for our next fabulous magician,
so stay close, everyone.
♪♪♪
[cheers and applause]
- Welcome back. I hope you're ready
for more fantastic magic
because we have some for you right now.
Take a look.
- I live in two worlds.
I was born in America, and my magic
is totally in the American style.
But we went to live in India when I was eight years old,
and India is where I learned to dance.
I was just 19 when I came on "Fool Us" for the first time.
I didn't expect to fool Penn and Teller.
I don't know how any magician can,
but I had some good advice
from a more experienced magician.
He said, "Don't focus on the fooling.
"Make magic the goal, and you win
no matter how you do."
And then I heard Penn say...
- We could not examine that deck, is that right?
- And then I said,
Yeah, these are yours.
I thought, "This can't be happening,"
and my heart beat fast.
And then I heard... - You fooled us.
[applause]
- Unbelievable.
Then the show aired, and my social media exploded
with people from India saying how much it meant
to see someone who looked like them succeed.
I'm still thinking about the magic,
of course, but I can't help it.
I'm also thinking about the trophy.
The excitement of coming on this show,
that's something that hasn't diminished at all.
[applause]
- Give it up for the magical mind of Sanjeev Vinodh.
[applause]
- Hi, Penn. Hi, Teller.
Thank you for inviting me on this season of "Card Tank."
Today I'm seeking a $10 investment for a 5% stake
in my latest invention...
two cups and a string.
- Oh, no.
- In Silicon Valley, they call this a string telephone.
You whisper something on one side,
it travels through the string,
and you hear it on the other side.
I know, it looks like a kindergarten science project,
but I brought the string phone into the digital age
by making it...
wireless.
[laughter]
[cheers and applause]
I'm going to need a caller to test this out.
Brooke, would you mind helping with this, please?
Give her a huge round of applause.
[applause] - All right.
How can I help you?
Nice to meet you. - Thanks for helping out.
- Nice to have you back. Of course.
- Brooke, this is going to be your phone for today,
so please hold on to this until the very end.
I also have a deck of 52 different cards.
For our demo, it's going to be like
52 different messages we can send, yeah?
Brooke, could you please touch the back of any card
that you'd like. This one.
I want you to look at it, but make sure none of us see it.
Yeah, keep it to yourself. Let me know once you got it.
- I've got it.
- In a moment, Brooke is going to whisper
the name of her card into her cup,
and whatever she says, I'm going to hear it in mine.
But before that, we need test conditions.
So, as Brooke is whispering from the audience,
I'm going to need some background noise, some static.
[imitates static] Okay? Brooke, get ready.
- I'm ready. - Audience, static, please.
[audience creates shushing]
[Brooke whispers indistinctly]
[audience "static" continues]
Signal's a little weak in here,
but, uh, Brooke, I heard
the ace--eight of clubs. Was that it?
- Bingo. - Show it to everyone.
That is the eight of clubs.
[applause]
Remember, Penn, Teller,
just $10.
[laughter] $9 for a 5% stake
in these cups.
And they come with even more features,
even speech-to-text software.
Let me show you. Brooke, one more time.
Could you please touch
the back of any card that you'd like.
That one? Yes, same as before.
I want you to look at it,
but make sure no one else sees it.
You got it? - Got it.
- Yeah? Audience, static please.
[audience creates shushing] Get ready to whisper.
- BROOKE: Okay.
[whispers indistinctly]
- Can you do it one more time?
[audience "static" continues]
Shh.
Brooke, what card did you whisper?
- Eight of spades. - The eight of spades?
- Yes, sir.
- The reason I couldn't hear Brooke is because my cup
converted her speech into text.
Which is why now printed inside my cup
is exactly the eight of spades.
- What?
What? [applause]
Okay.
- But Brooke, Penn, Teller,
I dreamt even...
[dramatic whisper] ...bigger.
[laughter] I dreamt of a whole network
of these cups around the world.
I dreamt of integrating these with the smartphones,
the voice assistants we already have,
which is why these cups come with Bluetooth technology.
- Amazing. [laughter]
- Paired.
[laughter] One final time.
[applause]
One final time. Brooke, could you please touch
the back of any card you like?
This one. Same as before.
You see it, but keep it a secret.
Audience, one final time.
[audience creates shushing]
Brooke, you know what to do.
[audience "static" continues]
Shh.
Think about this. Think about this.
Brooke, you could have picked any one of these cards,
and she just whispered it, right?
It's impossible for any of us to know
what card Brooke said.
But with these cups, anything is possible.
Google, what card did Brooke say?
- ALEXA: Two of spades. - Two of spades. Was that it?
That's the two of spades. [cheers and applause]
That's the string phone. [cheers and applause]
- Can I invest in this?
- $7. - Are we investing?
I'll do seven, you guys do three?
- Penn, Teller, I'm ready to hear your offer.
[laughter] - Wow.
[applause]
- BROOKE: Incredible!
Sanjeev Vinodh, come on over here.
Let's chat. That was fascinating.
- Thank you. I appreciate it. - Wow.
How did you come up with a concept like this?
- How did I come up with this? - Yeah.
- I think a lot of magic begins with just a silly idea.
You know, it pops in your head. You think, what if?
And I think, for me, something I've struggled with a lot before
is right after you get that "what if?"
you start thinking, "Oh, these are the things I know exist.
"These are things I know I could already do.
This is the stuff that's possible."
But luckily, with this one, I had the help
from some really smart friends, and they reminded me,
you know, just take that seed of the idea,
the purest form in your head, run with it.
- Do you have a philosophy about magic?
- Ah, I'm a kid.
[laughter]
-That's the beauty of it, right? - I'm just starting out.
I think magic's very special in the sense that
the older we all grow, we become more and more sure
of how the world works. - Mm-hmm.
- Yeah, we get very certain.
But magic can challenge
even the oldest person to just rethink.
"Oh, maybe, maybe there's something I don't know."
- All right, Sanjeev, let's see if
your potential investors have figured out your trick.
All right, here we go. Boys?
[applause]
- Sanjeev, welcome back.
I don't know about your two cups,
but we sure want to invest in you.
That's a--that's a great performance
and a great idea for a trick.
And I love paper cups with strings.
That's one of my favorite magic things to think about.
You've done a wonderful job of doing some really,
really, really nice uses,
some old technology and some very new technology.
Your premise of wanting people to invest
in your invention of the, uh,
of the two cups, there's actually
things you're using to accomplish that,
that if you did it yourself,
which I think you did,
you can probably sell
that great technology to magicians
because it's a really, really good system
and seems to work really well,
and you don't need marks in the audience
like they have on "Shark Tank" to say that,
because you've got it all up there on stage.
You just--all of it just really worked.
It was really funny, really great.
Really, really good magic
but we do not think you fooled us.
I think we snuck a few little words in there,
didn't we? Here and there?
- I think you did for sure.
- It seems that they really loved your act,
but you didn't fool them.
- Yes, that sounds about right.
But $7, $6. We'll talk.
- [laughs heartily]
- Don't lower it. You're worth it.
You're so worth it. Thank you so much.
It's a pleasure. Sanjeev Vinodh, everyone.
[cheers and applause]
So far, we've seen some amazing magic,
and we don't plan on stopping.
The conjuring continues when "Fool Us" returns.
[cheers and applause]
♪♪♪
- Welcome back, everyone.
Taking center stage to face P and T
is our next magician. Take a look.
- [speaking Spanish]
[cheers and applause]
- Coming to us from Valencia, Spain, it's Miraver.
[cheers and applause]
- MAN: You think that everything is in order,
in harmony and in balance.
But in the blink of an eye, chaos appears.
Albert Einstein said,
"God does not play dice with the universe."
But...
what happens when magic plays with the dice?
[applause]
[audience gasps]
[applause]
[audience gasps]
[applause]
[audience gasps]
[applause]
[audience gasps]
[applause]
[audience gasps, applause]
[cheers and applause]
- Miraver, everyone!
BROOKE: It was amazing.
What do you think is more challenging
up most, magic like this or big magic?
- [translator speaks Spanish]
- How does he choose which trick
that he's going to perform for them,
considering they've seen so much?
Are there many techniques in your dice routine
that are totally original?
Okay, Miraver, let's see if your trick
rattled Penn and Teller or if they figured it out.
Listo?
Okay, boys.
[cheers and applause]
- Miraver, ah...
I gotta tell you,
a lot of times on this show,
more times than I'd like to admit.
Teller likes the acts more than I do.
Teller likes certain kinds of niggly things
that I don't like one bit,
but I like the stuff that has juggling in it,
and I love dice stacking.
I just love dice stacking.
And I was over in Spain recently
with my dear friend Jandro,
and he said, "Well, there's this guy in Valencia
that you gotta see."
He's the best at dice stacking,"
and that's as far as we got.
He never said the name. He never said anything.
But I now know that my dear friend Jandro
was talking about you
because he knew I had to see you, and I had to see you.
Now....
The juggling parts of dice stacking, I just adore,
and if you just did the juggling parts
of dice stacking, I probably couldn't
in good conscience say,
that was great, great magic.
But you have that slide behind the cup
where it changes colors.
You have the stack that appears.
We know some dice stacking.
I've played with it,
but you have all sorts of stuff we don't know.
So I am thrilled out of my mind
to say that you did dice stacking,
and you fooled us.
[cheers and applause]
- Congratulations!
Amazing!
Miraver, everyone.
- Thanks, my man. - Thank you.
[indistinct chatter]
- MIRAVER: Thank you. Thank you.
- That's amazing.
[cheers and applause]
- Thank you so much.
Come back and see us again. Oh, that's so beautiful.
I just love this show. Makes me feel so good.
Another fooler has been welcomed into the world.
Penn and Teller, take some deep breaths,
because it's back to work when "Fool Us" returns.
♪♪♪
Welcome back, everyone.
Let's keep the party popping and bring out our next acts.
- Magic can bring happiness.
I know because it brought happiness to me.
I have autism and social anxiety.
I was in special education,
and because I loved magic,
they let me focus on that.
Magic really helped me get out of staying at home
in my safe little world where nothing can hurt me.
Because magic helped me practice my social skills,
I now have social skills.
I loved comedy, and I worked it into my act.
Humor helped me adjust with other people.
I knew my social role was to amuse people.
For me, laughter is the sound of acceptance.
When I go out on stage tonight,
I will stand in front of a room full of people
and try to make them laugh.
And if Penn and Teller laugh, too,
that will already feel like my trophy.
[cheers and applause]
- Direct from Denmark, here's magic world champion,
Mortenn Christiansen.
♪♪♪
- Hello.
I now realize this joke only works in Danish.
[laughter]
Hello. My name is Mortenn.
I'm from Denmark. I'm a magician.
Whoo, yeah. No, just--no.
[applause]
You can tell I'm a magician
because that is what the show is about,
and also, you can clearly tell
I have no friends.
So, uh...so,
and maybe you're wondering,
can you make a living off being a magician
if you're not Penn and Teller?
And, no.
[laughter]
Okay, but I have a trick. I have a trick.
It's not really a magic trick, but it's a trick.
It's sort of like voodoo. I'll show you. I'll show you.
Watch, I have-- I have made some drawings.
I've made some drawings here.
So let me just show-- show you these.
These are ducks.
Still not funny? Okay.
So this is here, it's a drawing I'm working on.
It's a drawing of me.
I'll just finish it.
It's not that good. I usually only draw ducks.
Well, I'll do my best.
Just like this.
Okay, so this...
Whoops.
This is me.
Look. We're the same. He has a hat and a face.
I have a hat and a face.
He has a smile.
[laughter]
We're now the same.
So if I do this,
[grunts]
then I feel it. It's...
The reason why I do this is so I can feel how it is
to have a connection with another person.
[laughter]
Got too real? Okay...
[laughter]
I'm sorry.
So we're now the same.
So if I do this-- I have here a lighter.
So if I do...
No, if I do this...
[audience gasps]
[blows]
Just to be clear, this does not hurt me.
It hurts the drawing.
[laughter]
But I feel what the drawing feels.
It's complicated.
I'll do this. I'll do this. I have here a fist.
I will now hit myself in the face.
Just for you guys.
[mild laughter]
Thank--Thank you.
[laughter]
"The guy from Denmark is going to hit himself in the face?
Oh, I'm glad I came."
[laughter]
I'm now going to hit myself in the face.
It is in moments like this where I really feel
like I should have gotten an education.
[laughter]
I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it.
Ugh.
Oh, my hat. Where's my...
[applause]
Oh, am I bleeding? Oh, I am. Ugh.
This is...[mutters]
This is too much.
Let's do this. You can--
You can have this as a souvenir.
I will sign it.
Like this.
Here you go.
Souvenir. - Thank you.
[audience laughs]
- I signed it on the face. I hope that's okay.
[laughter]
And one more thing before I go.
Okay.
Ducks?
[laughter] See, it works!
I'm going to go back to Denmark now. Thank you.
[cheers and applause]
- Mortenn Christiansen.
Let's give him a big hand, everyone.
Hi, Mortenn. - Hello.
- How different is magic culturally, in Denmark?
Are you sure you don't want a tissue?
- No, it's fine. It's fine.
It's not--It's not my blood.
[laughter]
How-- [laughs]
[laughter]
Did you ever imagine
that you would make it to this stage?
- No, not really.
Because I sent an email to "Fool Us" five years ago,
didn't hear back.
And then I became the world champion of magic last year,
and they are calling back.
[cheers and applause]
- Showbiz. - Yeah, yeah.
- What is your process like in deciding what magic
you're going to perform?
- It needs to be fun
or violent, clearly.
I'm really funny in Danish.
You should-- You all want to hear it?
Do we have time?
- Sure. - A Danish joke. Okay.
[speaking Danish]
[laughter]
I said it was a Danish joke. Come on.
- Okay, Mortenn, are you ready? Because it is time.
Let's find out if you have fooled Penn and Teller.
- Sir, how are things in Denmark?
- The weather is better than here. This is horrible.
[laughter]
- It's a little-- It's a little warm.
- Yeah. - I said when you finished,
I said, "I really like that act."
And Teller said, "I love him."
So Teller one-upped me
- Thank you so much. - ...right there.
And, you know, the slapstick. We just love that.
Like Jerry Lewis. We used to work with
Martin and Lewis. You know Martin and Lewis?
- Yeah, I've heard of that guy.
- It was very good, and we just say...
What we want to mostly say about your act
is it was really three ducks, which...
which is a pun that only works in Norwegian.
- Have you changed your name to do it?
- Yeah, exactly. [laughter]
It's now Penn with two Ns,
- which it was not until-- - Oh, that is so funny.
You don't even know why.
Okay. [laughter]
That is really funny.
So what are you saying? [laughter]
- BROOKE: Get to the point. - Come on.
- We just love, love, love you,
but we don't think you fooled us.
- Okay, but I think I didn't fool them,
but I think it's because I didn't get the duck joke.
So it's really their fault.
It's really their fault. - We take full blame.
- Well, Mortenn, you didn't fool them,
but you got all the love, and we love you.
Thank you so much.
Mortenn Christensen, everyone.
Well, we have one last trick up our sleeve,
and we're going to take it out of our sleeve,
and we're going to hand it over to Penn and Teller
to perform when "Fool Us" returns.
♪♪♪
Hi.
- Welcome back to "Fool Us."
So people say-- not me, but people--
say Teller does all the hard work,
and Penn's only remotely working.
Well, for tonight's final trick,
we've got Teller on stage and Penn working remotely.
Guys, take it away.
- Good evening. My name is Penn Jillette.
This is my partner, Teller. We are Penn and Teller.
We got two people from the audience.
We got a man who can get a ring off his finger.
What is your name, our newest friend?
- Pat. - Hello, Pat.
And someone who likes flowers.
What is your name, please? - Nicole.
- We have Pat and Nicole.
Now, Pat, you have a ring, right?
Now I always wear a ring, too.
This is called a carny ring.
Every carny performer wears a ring
that when he dies, can be pawned
and used to pay for his burial.
So that's my ring right there that I always wear.
Now Teller's got your ring
from off your finger there? - Yes.
- And here's the most important part.
This whole trick is based
on you being able to recognize your ring
when you see it again.
Will you recognize that ring, Pat?
- Yes, sir, I will. - Are you positive?
- I am positive. - Good.
Now we have a flower.
Want to make sure this is a real rose.
It has to be a real rose. Give that a whiff.
Is that a real rose, Pat? - That's a real rose.
- And Nicole, is that a real rose?
Give it a whiff. Give it a whiff.
- Mm-hmm. It is. - Now, Teller,
give that a whiff on me. Take a whiff on me.
There we go. And give me a whiff.
Oh, man, that stinks pretty. That's really nice.
Now, would you please hold firmly both ends of the rose?
Pat, you hold one end.
Nicole, you hold another right there.
This is a classic trick of magic.
Goes back hundreds, maybe thousands of years.
Nicole, are you all set there? Here we go, and...
one, two, three.
[audience gasps]
What do you see
on that rose, Nicole?
What do you see on that rose?
- I see the ring, - Nicole, what's on the rose?
- The golden ring. - Yes, it's a ring, Nicole,
on a real, no-kidding rose.
But the most important part of this is Pat.
Pat, is that your ring on a real rose?
- Yes, it is. - Are you sure it's your ring?
- I am positive.
- Say, "I, Pat, swear that's my ring."
- I, Pat, swear that's my ring.
- Say, "If that's not my ring,
"I will happily spend eternity in hell
doing nude lap dances for Nixon and [bleep]."
- [laughs] - You promise that?
- I promise!
- That's your ring, no doubt about it.
Thank you so much, Nicole.
You can take the flower. Please give the ring to Pat.
And you can go back to your seat right there.
Thank you so much, Nicole.
Give the ring to Pat, and you go right back to your seat.
What are you doing, Pat?
- This isn't my ring.
- What did you say? - This isn't my ring.
- That's not your ring? - No, it's not.
- Pat! Am I high on LSD?
Because I thought you said clearly that was your ring,
that you swore it was your ring.
Do you want to do nude lap dances in hell
for [bleep] and Nixon?
Is that your ring?
- It's not my ring.
- Hold it up to me. Let me see it.
Wait a minute. That--
That's my ring. So what's-- What's on my finger?
It doesn't even fit over my whole finger.
'cause yours-- that's your ring.
- [Pat laughs] -I'm in the back of the theater,
and I've got Pat's ring. I've got Pat--
You can see it wouldn't even fit on my finger.
So not only is Pat a liar,
he's also a ring thief.
I want my ring, Pat.
Here is your ring.
Let me take mine. Here's your ring.
And, Pat, Is that your ring?
- That is my ring. - Do you swear it's your ring?
- I swear this is my ring. - And that's my ring,
and I swear it is.
- Thank you so much, Pat. - Thank you very much.
- That's Pat. That's my ring. - Thank you.
- I got my carny ring right here.
[cheers and applause]
- That's all the miracles that we have for tonight.
But we'll have plenty more
when you join us next time on "Fool Us."
Good night, everyone.
[cheers and applause]