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>> Chris: ♪ BING BOP BEEP BOP

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♪ BO BA DEE DEE DEE BOO BEE

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♪ BOP BOP BOM BOM BEEP BOOP

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♪ DOOWOOP

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I THINK THAT ONE'S CALLED

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"HOTEL CALIFORNIA."

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AND NOW I'D LIKE TO DO FOR YOU

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SOME-- [GASPS]

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OOH.

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>> Susie: WHAT?

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>> Chris: I JUST GOT THE

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DISTINCT SENSATION DOWN IN MY

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FAMILY PARTS THAT SOMEBODY OUT

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THERE NEEDS MY HELP, AND IT'S

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KIND OF GETTING ME GOING.

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PULL OVER, SUSIE.

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I GOT TO FIND A FILENE'S

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CHANGING ROOM.

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>> Susie: NO, WE ARE NOT

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STOPPING.

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WE'RE ON THE RUN.

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WE'RE FUGITIVES.

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>> Chris: ♪ BO TAY HO TAY BOO

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♪ DEE BOO DEE BOO

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[ GRUNTS ]

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SHEESH.

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WHAT HAPPENED HERE?

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THIS PLACE IS REALLY SUCKING THE

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HORNY RIGHT OUT OF MY DOCKERS.

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>> [ HUMMING ]

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>> Susie: THAT WAS PROBABLY THE

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GUY THAT NEEDED YOUR HELP.

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ALL RIGHT, LET'S GO.

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>> Chris: WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.

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WHOA.

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HANG ON.

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>> Susie: WHAT'S WRONG?

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>> Chris: [ CHUCKLES ]

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SUSIE, ARE YOU BLIND?

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LOOK AROUND.

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EVERYBODY'S SHOES ARE SCUFFED.

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>> Susie: SO?

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>> Chris: SO NO WONDER THIS

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PLACE HAS HIT THE SKIDS.

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NOBODY WANTS TO DO BUSINESS WITH

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A MAN WITH DIRTY SHOES.

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THESE ARE THE POOR SAPS I WAS

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MEANT TO HELP.

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>> Susie: YOU REALLY THINK IT'S

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A GOOD IDEA TO STOP OUR SEARCH

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FOR BRETT TO SOLVE THE CASE OF

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THE SCUFFED SHOES?

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>> Chris: EXCUSE ME, WRINKLES.

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WHERE MIGHT A GENTLEMAN WITH THE

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PUREST OF INTENTIONS FIND A

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YOUNG SHOESHINE BOY IN THIS FAIR

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TOWN OF YOURS?

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>> SHOESHINE BOYS?

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[ CHUCKLES ]

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WHY, MILLBROOK'S NOT SEEN A

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SHINE BOY IN NEAR NOVER

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25 YEARS.

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>> Chris: WELL, WHAT HAPPENED TO

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THEM?

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>> OH, ONE DAY THEY JUST ALL UP

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AND LEFT US.

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NO ONE EVER FOUND WHERE THEY

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WENT.

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>> Susie: HUH!

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CASE CLOSED.

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>> Chris: [ CLEARS THROAT ]

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SUSAN, MEIN PAPPY ONCE TOLD ME

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THAT A MAN IS ONLY AS GOOD AS

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THE SHINE ON HIS SHOES.

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WE'RE GONNA GIVE THIS POOR TOWN

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ITS SHINE BACK.

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>> Susie: CHRIS, I DON'T THINK

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THAT WE HAVE TIME F--

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>> Chris: OKAY, GOOD.

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ALL RIGHT, WE GOT EVERYTHING.

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WE GOT RAGS, WE GOT SHOE POLISH

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MADE FROM COCOA BUTTER AND

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CAPTAIN'S LUNG HACKINGS.

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AND WE'RE...OH, OKAY.

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LOOK ALIVE, OLIVIER.

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COME ON.

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SAY, THIS HERE SHOESHINE BOY IS

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GIVING ME THE SHINE OF A

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LIFETIME AT A PRICE AFFORDABLE

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TO ALL.

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>> SHINE? SHOESHINE BOY?

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HERE?

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>> SHINE?

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>> SHOESHINE?

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>> KILL HIM!

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[ SIREN WAILING ]

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>> GET THAT SHINE BOY!

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[ ALL SHOUTING ]

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>> Chris: IT'S WORKING.

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THEY THINK YOU'RE A BOY.

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>> Susie: RUN, YOU IDIOT!

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>> OVER HERE, FELLA!

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[ PANTING ]

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YOU WAS LUCKY I CAUGHT YOU IN

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TIME.

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THOSE MILLBROOKERS WOULD'VE TORN

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YOU LIMB FROM LIMB.

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THEY DON'T TAKE TO OUR KIND UP

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THERE IN THE HUMAN WORLD.

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>> Susie: WHERE ARE WE?

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>> Chris: I DON'T KNOW, BUT

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DADDY LIKEY.

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UNDERGROUND WORLD -- CHECK.

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WEIRDOS THAT DON'T CONSIDER

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THEMSELVES HUMAN -- DOUBLE

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CHECK.

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>> BUSINESSMAN!

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>> Chris: HEY! WHOA.

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FELLAS, I AIN'T NO BUSINESSMAN.

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>> HE'S CLEAN.

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>> Susie: AND I'M NOT A

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SHINE BOY.

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I'M A LADY.

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>> LADY!

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>> Chris: HEY. HEY.

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BACK OFF, YOU CREEPS.

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>> JUST KIDDING, MISTER.

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SHINE BOYS DON'T HAVE FAMILY

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PARTS.

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NOW, WHAT BRINGS YOU TWO TO

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THESE PARTS?

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>> Chris: WELL, WE'RE LOOKING

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FOR THE LOST SHINE BOYS OF

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MILLBROOK.

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>> YOU DON'T SAY.

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FELLAS, WHERE'S YOUR

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HOSPITALI-SHINE?

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>> Chris: [ GASPS ]

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OH, MY GOD!

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IT'S REALLY YOU!

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>> WELCOME TO SHINEYTOWN, FOLKS.

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NAME'S SPATS, AND THESE ARE THE

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FELLAS.

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>> Chris: [ Chuckling ] HI.

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WHY DID YOU GUYS ABANDON THOSE

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BLOODTHIRSTY MANIACS UP THERE?

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>> WE DIDN'T ABANDON SQUAT.

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THEY RAN US OFF 25 SHINE YEARS

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AGO.

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32 HUMAN YEARS.

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EVERYTHING WAS HUNKY-DORY

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BETWEEN US AND THEN UP UNTIL ONE

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DAY WHEN TWO SHINE BOYS, BOTH

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WITH THE NEED FOR QUICK SHINES

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THEMSELVES, GOT THE NOTION THAT

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SHINING EACH OTHER'S SHOES MIGHT

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BE MORE COMFORTABLE THAN

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SELF-SHINING.

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>> Chris: HUH.

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>> THAT'S WHEN WE INVENTED

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60-SHINING.

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IT'S THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS.

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YOU GET TO SHINE SHOES AND YOU

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GET TO GET YOUR SHOES SHINED.

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OH, IT MAKES THE SOUL SING,

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MISTER.

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BUT THE TOWNSFOLK THOUGHT THERE

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WAS SOMETHING WRONG WITH IT.

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THEY SAID 60-SHINING WAS

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UNNATURAL, AN ABOMINATION.

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>> A SHOESHINE IS BETWEEN A

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SHINE BOY AND A BUSINESSMAN, NOT

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A SHINE BOY AND A -- A SHINE BOY

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NAMED STEVE.

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>> KILL THEM!

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[ SIREN WAILING ]

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>> THEY CHASED US AWAY, AND WE

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FOUND THIS PLACE.

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[ MOB SHOUTING ]

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[ DOOR SLAMS ]

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HERE WE CAN SPEND OUR DAYS DOING

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WHAT COMES NATURAL, 60-SHINING,

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GLAZEY CHAINS, SOLE TRAINS --

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SPELLED S-O-L-E.

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>> Susie: WELL, IT SEEMS LIKE

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YOU GUYS HAVE IT ALL FIGURED

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OUT, SO WE'RE JUST GONNA --

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>> Chris: NO. NO. NO. NO.

189
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NOT SO FAST.

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YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE TO HIDE DOWN

191
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HERE.

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>> NO, CHRIS.

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WE SHOULD.

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WE'RE DISGUSTING THROUGH AND

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THROUGH.

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>> Chris: OH, SPATS.

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YOU KNOW, THOSE PEOPLE UP THERE,

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THEY'RE NOT EVIL.

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THEY'RE JUST OLD-FASHIONED AND

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QUICK TO RAGE.

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IF WE COULD CONVINCE THEM OF THE

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INNOCENCE OF YOUR JOY, THEN

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THEY'D ACCEPT YOU.

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>> BUT HOW, CHRIS?

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>> Chris: WELL, YOU SAID THAT

206
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60-SHINING MAKES YOUR SOUL SING.

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>> YEAH. I SAID THAT.

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>> Chris: SO WHY DON'T WE TRY TO

209
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WIN THEM OVER WITH A SONG?

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HUH?

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♪ SHINE, SHINE, SHOOBELY SHINE

212
00:05:16,938 --> 00:05:18,688
♪ I'LL SHINE YOUR SHOES IF YOU

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SHINE MINE ♪

214
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>> ♪ SHINE, SHINE, DOOBELY

215
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DINE ♪

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♪ THE POLISH FLOWS LIKE A

217
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HEAVENLY WINE ♪

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>> All: ♪ SHINE, SHINE, SHOOBELY

219
00:05:35,271 --> 00:05:35,979
SHINE ♪

220
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♪ I SHINE YOUR SHOES AND YOU

221
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SHINE MINE ♪

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WHOA!

223
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♪ SHINE, SHINE, SHOOBELY SHINE

224
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♪ GONNA SHINE, SHINE, SHOOBELY

225
00:05:44,313 --> 00:05:44,938
SHI-INE ♪

226
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>> ♪ SHINING SHOES CHASE AWAY

227
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THEM BLUES ♪

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>> All: ♪ SHINE, SHINE, SHOOBELY

229
00:05:49,896 --> 00:05:51,021
SHI-INE ♪

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>> ♪ IT'S THE POLISH, IT'S THE

231
00:05:52,188 --> 00:05:52,729
LEATHER ♪

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>> ♪ IT'S THE WAY THEY GO

233
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TOGETHER ♪

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>> All: ♪ SHINE, SHINE, SHOOBELY

235
00:05:55,563 --> 00:05:56,604
SHINE ♪

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>> Chris: COME ON, GUYS!

237
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>> EVERYBODY!

238
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>> All: ♪ SHINE, SHINE, SHOOBELY

239
00:06:00,354 --> 00:06:00,979
SHINE ♪

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♪ SHINE, SHINE, SHOOBELY

241
00:06:01,729 --> 00:06:03,938
SHI-INE ♪

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>> ♪ EVERYBODY GONNA SHINE

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>> All: ♪ EVERYBODY GONNA

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SHINE ♪

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>> ♪ EVERYBODY GONNA SHINE

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>> All: ♪ GONNA SHOOBELY SHINE

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>> Chris: PEOPLE OF MILLBROOK,

248
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IT'S TIME TO PUT AWAY DECADES OF

249
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PREJUDICE.

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THESE SHINE BOYS AREN'T

251
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MONSTERS.

252
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THEY'RE JUST A BUNCH OF MILDLY

253
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WEIRD-LOOKING, SMALL, CREEPY

254
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GUYS.

255
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LET'S LOOK TO OUR HEARTS.

256
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WHAT DO YOU SAY, FOLKS?

257
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>> WE MAY HAVE JUDGED YOU BOYS A

258
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LITTLE HARSHLY.

259
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YEAH!

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>> Together: ♪ SHINE, SHINE,

261
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SHOOBELY SHINE ♪

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>> GET KNEELIN' AND START THE

263
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HEALIN', BOYS!

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>> Together: ♪ SHINE, SHINE,

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SHOOBELY SHI-INE ♪

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♪ SHINE, SHINE

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>> Susie: ALL RIGHT.

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YOU WIN.

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>> YOUR SHOES ARE ALL SO CLEAN.

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>> 25 YEARS OF NONSTOP SHINING.

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I FIGURE THEY'VE GOT TO BE ABOUT

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THE SHINIEST THINGS ON EARTH.

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[ WARBLING ]

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>> GOD! T-THERE TOO SHINY!

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[ PEOPLE SCREAMING ]

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[ SIREN WAILING ]

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>> [ SCREAMS ]

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[ GUNSHOTS ]

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>> [ SCREAMS ]

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[ BOTH SCREAM ]

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>> NOW SHINE AND BECOME DEATH,

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DESTROYER OF WORLDS.

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>> FROGGY! DON'T!

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>> COMMERCIAL PLANE DOWN.

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MISSILES FIRED.

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SCRAMBLE EVERYTHING WE'VE GOT.

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WE'RE TAKING OUT MILLBROOK.

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[ RAPID GUNFIRE ]

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>> WHAT ARE WE DOING?

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CAN SOMEONE TELL ME WHAT THE

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FUCK WE'RE DOING?!

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>> CHILL OUT, HAMMERHEAD!

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CHILL THE FUCK OUT!

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>> NO!

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[ SIREN CONTINUES ]

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[ GUNFIRE ]

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>> [ GRUNTS ]

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>> [ GASPS ]

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>> WHOA.

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[ CAR HORN BUZZES ]

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[ SMACKS ]

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>> [ SCREAMS ]

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>> WOW!

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[ HORSE NEIGHS ]

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[ SMACKS ]

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>> [ SNEEZES ]

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[ SLIDE WHISTLE ]

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[ EXPLOSION ]

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[ EXPLOSIONS IN DISTANCE ]

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>> Chris: WELL, I GOT TO HAND IT

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TO YOU, OLD LADY.

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YOU GUYS WERE RIGHT ABOUT THESE

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SHINE BOYS.

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>> OH, SHUT UP, IDIOT.

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YOU RUINED OUR TOWN.

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EVERYBODY I KNOW IS DEAD.

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>> Chris: WELL, PARDON ME FOR

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TRYING TO HELP.

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GEEZ, YOU BELIEVE THIS HAG?

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>> [ SNARLS ]

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>> Susie: HEY!

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WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

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>> WHAT? I THOUGHT YOU WAS ONE

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OF THEM DEAD BODIES.

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>> Chris: OH!

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SWEET JEHOVAH!

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EITHER I'VE SUFFERED SOME

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SHINE-RELATED CORNEAL DAMAGE OR

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YOU ARE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMAN

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I HAVE EVER SEEN.

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>> DOREEN.

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>> Chris: AH.

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MMM. MM. OH.

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[ CRUNCHING ]

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>> Susie: AH! AH!

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STOP IT!

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>> WHAT?

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I WAS JUST TAKING HIS TEETH.

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NOT SO I COULD BARTER WITH THE

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TOOTH BARON.

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SO WE CAN MAKE OUT.

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>> Chris: OH.

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>> Susie: NO. NO. NO.

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WE ARE NOT PICKING UP ANY MORE

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WEIRD WOMEN.

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>> Chris: MM!

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>> I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!

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I'M COMING FOR YOU!

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>> Chris: SHEILA! NO!

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>> [ SCREAMS ]

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>> Chris: THIS ENDS NOW.

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>> [ GROANS ]

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>> Chris: [ GASPS ]

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OH, GOD.

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SPATS.

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>> [ Whimpering ] SHOE...ME.

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SHOE...ME.

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SHOE...ME.

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SHOE...ME.

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SHOE...ME.

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[ HORN HONKS ]

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>> Susie: WE'RE DONE HERE.

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>> Chris: YES, WE ARE.

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AND FOR YOUR INFORMATION, I

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THINK WE WERE VERY HELPFUL.

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>> ♪ DA, DA, DA, DA, DA

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♪ LA, DA, DA, DA, DA, DA

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♪ DA, DAM, DA, DA, DA