1
00:00:07,396 --> 00:00:09,229
[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]

2
00:00:14,771 --> 00:00:16,813
>> Chris: [ CLEARS THROAT ]
ARE YOU THE ONE THEY CALL
"THE WIPER"?

3
00:00:16,896 --> 00:00:17,813
>> DEPENDS.

4
00:00:17,896 --> 00:00:19,688
ARE YOU CHRIS MONSANTO...

5
00:00:19,771 --> 00:00:20,271
THE MARSHAL?

6
00:00:20,354 --> 00:00:21,604
>> Chris: OH. EASY, FELLA.

7
00:00:21,688 --> 00:00:23,188
FORMER MARSHAL, OKAY?

8
00:00:23,271 --> 00:00:24,354
I'M ON THE RUN NOW.

9
00:00:24,438 --> 00:00:26,354
I NEED ONE OF YOUR WORLD-FAMOUS
WIPES.

10
00:00:26,438 --> 00:00:28,688
NEED A NEW NAME, NEW SOCIAL, THE
WORKS.

11
00:00:28,771 --> 00:00:32,271
>> YEAH, I COULD WIPE YOU, EVERY
WHICH WAY, INCLUDING LOOSE.

12
00:00:32,354 --> 00:00:35,104
BUT ASS, GLASS, OR PAST, I DO
NOT WIPE FOR FREE.

13
00:00:35,188 --> 00:00:37,479
>> Susie: DID YOU JUST SAY THAT
YOU WIPE ASS FOR MONEY?

14
00:00:37,563 --> 00:00:39,604
>> I AIN'T PROUD OF SOME OF THE
STUFF I'VE WIPED.

15
00:00:39,688 --> 00:00:40,771
EVEN A WIPER'S GOT TO EAT...

16
00:00:40,854 --> 00:00:44,896
THEN MAKE, THEN SELF-WIPE, THEN
CHARGE MYSELF TOP DOLLAR.

17
00:00:44,979 --> 00:00:47,646
I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING --
I'M PAYING PETER TO WIPE PAUL.

18
00:00:47,729 --> 00:00:48,729
BUT I GOT PLANS.

19
00:00:48,813 --> 00:00:51,229
>> Susie: DO YOU KNOW ANY OTHER
WIPERS AROUND HERE?

20
00:00:51,313 --> 00:00:52,438
>> ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

21
00:00:52,521 --> 00:00:55,146
LOOK, IF I'M GONNA SET YOU UP
WITH A NEW IDENTITY, FIRST WE

22
00:00:55,229 --> 00:00:57,479
NEED TO FAKE YOUR DEATH, WHICH
MEANS WE NEED A BODY.

23
00:00:57,563 --> 00:00:59,188
>> Chris: I SEE.

24
00:00:59,271 --> 00:00:59,563
THE OLD CORPUS CHRISSY, HUH?

25
00:00:59,646 --> 00:01:00,688
>> OH, YEAH.

26
00:01:00,771 --> 00:01:03,188
>> Chris: OKAY. WELL, DO YOU
THINK YOU CAN FIND A BODY TO

27
00:01:03,271 --> 00:01:03,979
MATCH THIS TUB OF GUTS RIGHT
HERE?

28
00:01:04,063 --> 00:01:06,604
>> YEAH, I CAN GET SOMETHING
LIKE THAT.

29
00:01:06,688 --> 00:01:07,813
FOR 10 GRAND.

30
00:01:07,896 --> 00:01:09,438
>> Chris: OKAY, GIVE IT UP.

31
00:01:09,521 --> 00:01:12,271
>> Susie: OKAY.

32
00:01:12,354 --> 00:01:13,771
>> GIVE ME A FEW MINUTES.

33
00:01:14,563 --> 00:01:17,063
[ GRUNTS ]
[ GUNSHOT ]

34
00:01:26,438 --> 00:01:28,438
>> Chris: I THINK THAT WAS
PROBABLY FOR THE BEST.

35
00:01:28,521 --> 00:01:29,354
THAT GUY SEEMED TO HAVE A LOT OF
ISSUES.

36
00:01:29,438 --> 00:01:30,688
>> FREEZE!

37
00:01:30,771 --> 00:01:31,688
>> Chris: OH, CRAP.

38
00:01:31,771 --> 00:01:32,271
HAUL BALLS, KID!

39
00:01:32,354 --> 00:01:34,604
OH! OW!

40
00:01:34,688 --> 00:01:37,688
OW! MY --
ALL RIGHT, YES, OKAY.

41
00:01:37,771 --> 00:01:40,354
YEAH, AND THEN YOU TWIST THE
ARM...

42
00:01:40,438 --> 00:01:45,063
>> YOUR RECORD SHOWS A LIFETIME
OF INSANELY VIOLENT BEHAVIOR.

43
00:01:45,146 --> 00:01:47,896
YOU ARE A BLIGHT ON DECENT
SOCIETY.

44
00:01:47,979 --> 00:01:51,354
BEFORE I IMPOSE THE HARSHEST
SENTENCE MY AUTHORITY WILL

45
00:01:51,438 --> 00:01:55,271
ALLOW, DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING TO
SAY ABOUT YOURSELF AND YOUR

46
00:01:55,354 --> 00:01:56,771
WASTED LIFE?

47
00:01:56,854 --> 00:01:59,396
>> Chris: I DO, YOUR HONOR.

48
00:01:59,479 --> 00:02:04,188
YES, IT'S TRUE -- I'M A VIOLENT
MAN.

49
00:02:04,271 --> 00:02:08,354
BUT I'M THAT WAY FOR ONE REASON
AND ONE REASON ALONE -- BECAUSE

50
00:02:08,438 --> 00:02:11,563
AMERICA DEMANDS IT.

51
00:02:11,646 --> 00:02:13,688
THAT'S RIGHT -- AMERICA.

52
00:02:13,771 --> 00:02:17,729
FOREVER EGGING ME ON, INSISTING
ON MORE BRUTALITY.

53
00:02:17,813 --> 00:02:21,271
AND THAT IS WHY IT SHOULD NOT BE
ME ON TRIAL HERE TODAY BUT

54
00:02:21,354 --> 00:02:23,188
AMERICA ITSELF!

55
00:02:23,271 --> 00:02:25,354
[ SPECTATORS GASP ]
>> YOU COULDN'T KEEP YOUR MOUTH

56
00:02:25,438 --> 00:02:26,188
SHUT, COULD YOU, CHRIS?!

57
00:02:26,271 --> 00:02:26,688
>> Chris: CALM DOWN.

58
00:02:26,771 --> 00:02:27,771
>> TAKE A SEAT, SIR.

59
00:02:27,854 --> 00:02:30,354
>> YOU ALL SAW THAT, RIGHT?

60
00:02:30,438 --> 00:02:30,813
HE HIT ME! SELF-DEFENSE!

61
00:02:30,896 --> 00:02:32,563
>> AMERICA, DON'T!

62
00:02:32,646 --> 00:02:33,729
>> STAND BACK! I'LL SHOOT!

63
00:02:33,813 --> 00:02:36,813
NOW YOU'RE GONNA LET ME OUT OF
HERE, OR EVERYONE'S FAVORITE

64
00:02:36,896 --> 00:02:40,229
EX-MARSHAL GETS A BULLET TO THE
BRAIN, AND I AIN'T TALKIN' ABOUT

65
00:02:40,313 --> 00:02:41,104
THE PRETTY KIND!

66
00:02:41,188 --> 00:02:42,729
[ LAUGHING ]
>> Chris: WHERE ARE WE GOING?

67
00:02:42,813 --> 00:02:43,896
WHERE ARE YOU TAKING ME?

68
00:02:43,979 --> 00:02:47,729
>> WE'RE GOING ON A LITTLE
ADVENTURE, JUST YOU AND ME PAL.

69
00:02:47,813 --> 00:02:50,229
OH, LOOK -- HERE COMES OUR RIDE.

70
00:02:50,313 --> 00:02:51,771
OUT OF THE CAR, ASSHOLE!

71
00:02:51,854 --> 00:02:52,771
COME ON! OUTSKIE!

72
00:02:52,854 --> 00:02:55,396
>> I-I GOT A WIFE AND KIDS.

73
00:02:55,479 --> 00:02:57,396
>> ON YOUR KNEES, BEG ME PLEASE.

74
00:02:57,479 --> 00:02:58,688
>> I -- I...

75
00:02:58,771 --> 00:03:01,271
PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE...TO YOU...

76
00:03:01,354 --> 00:03:02,771
A-AND TO THE REPUBLIC FOR WHICH
YOU --

77
00:03:02,854 --> 00:03:03,563
>> Chris: GEEZ!

78
00:03:03,646 --> 00:03:04,104
WHY DID YOU DO THAT?!

79
00:03:04,188 --> 00:03:06,271
HE HAD A WIFE AND KIDS!

80
00:03:06,354 --> 00:03:09,146
>> OH, YEAH?

81
00:03:09,229 --> 00:03:10,479
WIFE AND KIDS, HUH?

82
00:03:10,563 --> 00:03:11,604
>> Chris: OKAY, BUT STILL...

83
00:03:11,688 --> 00:03:12,229
I MEAN, COME ON.

84
00:03:12,313 --> 00:03:12,854
>> GET IN THE FUCKING CAR!

85
00:03:12,938 --> 00:03:14,479
COME ON! DRIVE, ASSHOLE!

86
00:03:14,563 --> 00:03:16,563
>> Chris: YOU KNOW, I THINK IT'S
THE CUSSING THAT REALLY GETS TO

87
00:03:16,646 --> 00:03:19,104
ME THE MOST.

88
00:03:19,188 --> 00:03:21,438
>> ON THE GO, TIME FOR SOME
BLOW!

89
00:03:21,521 --> 00:03:24,396
[ SNIFFS ]
OH, YEAH!

90
00:03:24,479 --> 00:03:25,563
NOW IT'S YOUR TURN, SUGAR BUNS.

91
00:03:25,646 --> 00:03:27,063
>> Chris: NO, THANK YOU, I'M
FINE.

92
00:03:27,146 --> 00:03:28,771
>> COME ON! DO IT, YOU PANSY!

93
00:03:28,854 --> 00:03:30,979
>> Chris: [ SNIFFS ]
[ GUNSHOT ]

94
00:03:31,063 --> 00:03:34,646
>> [ LAUGHING ]
CALM DOWN, YOU BABY.

95
00:03:34,729 --> 00:03:35,313
IT WASN'T LOADED.

96
00:03:35,396 --> 00:03:37,188
>> Chris: YOU JUST SHOT IT!

97
00:03:37,271 --> 00:03:38,063
>> OOH, YEAH!

98
00:03:38,146 --> 00:03:38,938
I CAN FEEL IT SLIPPIN' THROUGH
MY VEINS.

99
00:03:39,021 --> 00:03:39,979
WHOO-HOO! WHOO-HOO! WHOO-HOO!

100
00:03:40,063 --> 00:03:41,479
>> Chris: CAN I TELL YOU
SOMETHING?

101
00:03:41,563 --> 00:03:43,313
YOU ARE SICK.

102
00:03:43,396 --> 00:03:46,271
>> YEAH, SICK OF ALL THIS GRAVY
I GOT IN MY BAG.

103
00:03:46,354 --> 00:03:48,229
SO WE'RE GONNA MAKE A LITTLE PIT
STOP.

104
00:03:48,313 --> 00:03:49,354
>> Chris: YEAH? WHERE'S THAT?

105
00:03:49,438 --> 00:03:50,438
>> TO SKEEZ HOUSE!

106
00:03:50,521 --> 00:03:52,771
WE'RE GONNA STUFF SOME DURMA
BEFORE WE SHUFFLE OFF THIS

107
00:03:52,854 --> 00:03:53,646
MORTAL STINKBOX.

108
00:03:53,729 --> 00:03:55,438
NOW DRIVE!

109
00:03:55,521 --> 00:03:57,438
OUT.

110
00:03:57,521 --> 00:03:59,313
>> Chris: I DON'T WANT ANY
SKEEZ.

111
00:03:59,396 --> 00:04:00,813
>> WELL, I AIN'T TAKIN' NO
CHANCES.

112
00:04:00,896 --> 00:04:01,604
NOW MOVE!

113
00:04:01,688 --> 00:04:02,646
>> Chris: GEEZ.

114
00:04:02,729 --> 00:04:05,479
>> BONJOUR, SKANKS.

115
00:04:05,563 --> 00:04:07,354
>> HI, AMERICA.

116
00:04:07,438 --> 00:04:09,604
IS IT TIME FOR MY FLORIDA
VACATION?

117
00:04:09,688 --> 00:04:11,021
>> NOT TONIGHT, HONEY.

118
00:04:11,104 --> 00:04:12,521
IS COCKEYED JENNY WORKIN'?

119
00:04:12,604 --> 00:04:13,646
>> UPSTAIRS.

120
00:04:13,729 --> 00:04:15,229
>> LADIES, THIS HERE IS CHRISSY.

121
00:04:15,313 --> 00:04:16,313
TREAT HIM LIKE A KING.

122
00:04:16,396 --> 00:04:17,021
RODNEY KING!

123
00:04:17,104 --> 00:04:18,479
HE LIKES THE ROUGH STUFF!

124
00:04:18,563 --> 00:04:21,438
>> HEY. I'LL STOMP ON YOUR YAM
BAGS FOR A FIVER.

125
00:04:21,521 --> 00:04:22,604
>> OOH, GOOD DEAL!

126
00:04:22,688 --> 00:04:25,646
>> Chris: OH, DEAR LORD, YOU'VE
DELIVERED UNTO ME A SWEET

127
00:04:25,729 --> 00:04:29,313
ANGEL -- [ SNIFFS ] -- WITH THE
BREATH OF A GOOSE ON A TOP SHELF

128
00:04:29,396 --> 00:04:31,396
THAT WON'T QUIT, AND IT CAN'T
GET FIRED.

129
00:04:31,479 --> 00:04:33,313
UNIONS -- WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO
ABOUT THEM?

130
00:04:33,396 --> 00:04:37,688
GOT TO LIVE WITH THEM --
HEY, HONEY --

131
00:04:37,771 --> 00:04:39,813
>> HIYA, SUGAR DUMPS!

132
00:04:43,896 --> 00:04:44,688
COCKEYED JENNY.

133
00:04:44,771 --> 00:04:47,604
AS I LIVE AND HEAVE.

134
00:04:47,688 --> 00:04:49,354
>> AMERICA!

135
00:04:49,438 --> 00:04:50,729
I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU FOR 15 YEARS.

136
00:04:50,813 --> 00:04:53,229
LOST MY NUMBER, DID YOU?

137
00:04:53,313 --> 00:04:55,729
>> HAS IT REALLY BEEN THAT LONG,
MA?

138
00:04:55,813 --> 00:04:57,521
>> AYE, THAT IT HAS, SON.

139
00:04:57,604 --> 00:04:58,271
WHAT BRINGS YOU BACK TO ME?

140
00:04:58,354 --> 00:05:00,396
>> JUST WANTED TO SAY GOODBYE,
MA.

141
00:05:00,479 --> 00:05:03,563
THIS TIME TOMORROW, I'LL
PROBABLY BE SELLING LEMONADE IN

142
00:05:03,646 --> 00:05:05,104
HELL.

143
00:05:05,188 --> 00:05:06,396
>> YOU'RE IN TROUBLE?

144
00:05:06,479 --> 00:05:07,521
>> PLENTY.

145
00:05:07,604 --> 00:05:10,229
BUT ALL I'M SORRY FOR IS THE
TROUBLE I'VE CAUSED YOU, MA.

146
00:05:10,313 --> 00:05:13,688
>> THERE WERE A LOT OF SLEEPLESS
NIGHTS, 'MERC.

147
00:05:13,771 --> 00:05:17,604
>> YOU SURE ARE A SIGHT FOR SORE
EYES, MA.

148
00:05:17,688 --> 00:05:20,396
>> AND YOU FOR SORE LIPS.

149
00:05:20,479 --> 00:05:28,229
[ SMOOCHING ]
IT'S OKAY.

150
00:05:28,313 --> 00:05:31,563
[ GUNSHOT ]
[ GROANS ]

151
00:05:31,646 --> 00:05:32,688
>> SORRY, MA.

152
00:05:32,771 --> 00:05:34,396
COULDN'T HAVE YOU SQUEALIN'.

153
00:05:34,479 --> 00:05:39,146
BUT BEFORE YOU DIE, I GOTSTA
KNOW -- WHO WAS MY REAL POPS?

154
00:05:39,229 --> 00:05:40,396
>> I WISH I KNEW, SON.

155
00:05:40,479 --> 00:05:41,479
THERE WERE SO MANY.

156
00:05:41,563 --> 00:05:43,396
[ SIREN WAILS ]
>> COPS!

157
00:05:43,479 --> 00:05:44,688
I HATE COPS!

158
00:05:44,771 --> 00:05:47,896
SMELL YOU LATER, MA!

159
00:05:47,979 --> 00:05:49,938
OH, YEAH, AND IF ANYBODY ASKS,
A BLACK GUY SHOT YOU.

160
00:05:50,021 --> 00:05:52,771
>> TIME TO VAMOOSE, CHRISSY BOY!

161
00:05:52,854 --> 00:05:54,521
LET HIM GO, GALS!

162
00:05:54,604 --> 00:05:55,521
HEY! CHOP-CHOP!

163
00:05:55,604 --> 00:05:57,146
WE GOT To POP THIS SLOP HOP!

164
00:05:57,229 --> 00:05:58,313
>> Chris: EXCUSE ME.

165
00:05:58,396 --> 00:06:01,438
I'M TALKING WITH TRISH, THE NEW
LOVE OF MY SOON-TO-END LIFE.

166
00:06:01,521 --> 00:06:01,938
>> HEY.

167
00:06:02,021 --> 00:06:02,896
>> WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

168
00:06:02,979 --> 00:06:03,979
>> Chris: SHE'S THE
TOBACCO-SPITTING IMAGE OF

169
00:06:04,063 --> 00:06:05,729
BRETT'S SISTER, TESS.

170
00:06:05,813 --> 00:06:07,104
>> YEAH, COME ON, CASSA-NO-NUTS.

171
00:06:07,188 --> 00:06:09,271
>> Chris: I'LL TAKE YOU AWAY
FROM THIS HORRIBLE PLACE, I

172
00:06:09,354 --> 00:06:09,938
PROMISE.

173
00:06:10,021 --> 00:06:10,604
I PROMISE. WAIT FOR ME, OKAY?

174
00:06:10,688 --> 00:06:12,604
>> SURE.

175
00:06:12,688 --> 00:06:14,104
>> Chris: OH, TRISH.

176
00:06:14,188 --> 00:06:16,521
TRISH!

177
00:06:16,604 --> 00:06:18,563
>> ONCE WE CROSS THE BORDER,
WE'RE SET.

178
00:06:18,646 --> 00:06:20,771
WE'LL HEAD SOUTH AND HIT UP MY
BUDDY IN CABO -- SAMMY HAGAR.

179
00:06:20,854 --> 00:06:22,563
GOOD GUY, GOOD GUY!

180
00:06:22,646 --> 00:06:23,646
YOU KNOW HIM? "RED ROCKER"?

181
00:06:23,729 --> 00:06:25,271
>> Chris: YEAH.

182
00:06:25,354 --> 00:06:26,063
NOT A FAN.

183
00:06:26,146 --> 00:06:28,646
>> I'LL PRETEND I DIDN'T HEAR
THAT.

184
00:06:28,729 --> 00:06:31,396
[ THUDS ]
WHAT THE FUCK YOU DOING

185
00:06:31,479 --> 00:06:32,604
STOPPIN' THE CAR FOR?

186
00:06:32,688 --> 00:06:34,354
[ BELL DINGING ]
CHRIS?

187
00:06:34,438 --> 00:06:35,438
CHRIS?

188
00:06:35,521 --> 00:06:35,813
CHRIS! CHRIS!

189
00:06:35,896 --> 00:06:38,271
CHILD LOCKS! NO!

190
00:06:38,354 --> 00:06:45,813
[ METAL CRUNCHING ]
[ GRUNTING ]

191
00:06:47,563 --> 00:06:49,271
CHRIS?

192
00:06:49,354 --> 00:06:51,229
CHRIS?

193
00:06:51,313 --> 00:06:52,271
HE'S GONE.

194
00:06:52,354 --> 00:06:55,771
THAT SON OF A BITCH WENT
DIAMOND DAVE ON ME.

195
00:06:55,854 --> 00:06:57,521
ALL RIGHT! A FARM HOUSE.

196
00:06:57,604 --> 00:06:58,646
TIME TO CHARM OLD McDUMBASS.

197
00:07:04,646 --> 00:07:06,104
EXCUSE ME, GOOD SIR.

198
00:07:06,188 --> 00:07:09,688
I HAPPEN TO BE A TRAVELING BIBLE
SALESMAN WHOSE CAR BROKE DOWN.

199
00:07:09,771 --> 00:07:12,646
NICE TO MEET YOU.

200
00:07:12,729 --> 00:07:14,188
>> WHERE'S YER BIBLES?

201
00:07:14,271 --> 00:07:15,479
>> UH, I SOLD THEM ALL.

202
00:07:15,563 --> 00:07:17,688
I'M THE BEST!

203
00:07:17,771 --> 00:07:19,688
>> WELL...

204
00:07:19,771 --> 00:07:23,438
THEN THAT MAKES YOU THE SECOND
BIBLE SALESMAN COME BY TONIGHT

205
00:07:23,521 --> 00:07:24,688
SAYIN' HE'S THE BEST.

206
00:07:24,771 --> 00:07:26,521
>> HUH?

207
00:07:26,604 --> 00:07:28,146
OH. HELLO.

208
00:07:28,229 --> 00:07:32,646
I DON'T BELIEVE WE'VE MET.

209
00:07:32,729 --> 00:07:34,646
>> YOU BOYS HUNGRY?

210
00:07:36,438 --> 00:07:42,688
>> [ SLURPING ]
>> WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE PASSAGE?

211
00:07:42,771 --> 00:07:44,271
>> Chris: I'M SORRY, WHAT?

212
00:07:44,354 --> 00:07:46,521
>> FROM THE BOOK.

213
00:07:46,604 --> 00:07:48,271
>> Chris: OH, THE BOOK.

214
00:07:48,354 --> 00:07:50,354
RIGHT. UH...

215
00:07:50,438 --> 00:07:53,646
WELL, I GUESS I'D HAVE TO SAY,
UM...MY FAVORITE PASSAGE IS,

216
00:07:53,729 --> 00:07:55,646
UM...JESUS 1.

217
00:07:55,729 --> 00:07:58,313
YOU KNOW, WHERE IT ALL STARTED.

218
00:07:58,396 --> 00:08:00,271
>> HMM.

219
00:08:00,354 --> 00:08:01,479
AND YOURS?

220
00:08:01,563 --> 00:08:03,688
>> YOU KNOW, I SELL THEM SO
FAST, I NEVER GET TO READ THEM.

221
00:08:03,771 --> 00:08:04,729
BUT I HEAR GREAT THINGS!

222
00:08:04,813 --> 00:08:05,729
SAY, WHAT DO YOU CALL THIS
STUFF, CORN?

223
00:08:05,813 --> 00:08:09,396
>> UH-HUH.

224
00:08:09,479 --> 00:08:12,396
IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME.

225
00:08:12,479 --> 00:08:14,146
>> YOU BOYS AIN'T NO BIBLE
SALESMEN.

226
00:08:14,229 --> 00:08:15,604
I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE UP TO,
BUT YOU BEST GET YOUR SCRUDS ON

227
00:08:15,688 --> 00:08:18,854
THOSE PLATES BEFORE MY HUSBAND
GETS BACK, ELSE THINGS GONNA

228
00:08:18,938 --> 00:08:20,271
TURN REAL BAD REAL QUICK.

229
00:08:20,354 --> 00:08:21,729
>> Chris: SCRUDS? WHAT?

230
00:08:21,813 --> 00:08:22,688
>> QUIT FOOLIN'!

231
00:08:22,771 --> 00:08:24,854
PLATE THEM SCRUDS! NOW!

232
00:08:24,938 --> 00:08:27,354
>> I -- I -- I GUESS --
[ UNZIPPING ]

233
00:08:27,438 --> 00:08:29,021
>> EXCUSE ME.

234
00:08:29,104 --> 00:08:29,813
>> MY SISTER'S CRAZY!

235
00:08:29,896 --> 00:08:32,313
SHE MAKES ME PRETEND TO BE HER
HUSBAND.

236
00:08:32,396 --> 00:08:34,604
IF YOU DON'T TAKE THEM SCRUDS
OFF THEM PLATES RIGHT NOW, HER

237
00:08:34,688 --> 00:08:36,604
REAL HUSBAND'S GONNA COME BACK,
AND IT AIN'T GONNA BE PRETTY --

238
00:08:36,688 --> 00:08:39,438
NOT AS PRETTY AS THEM SCRUDS OF
YOURS, I GUARANTEE YOU THAT.

239
00:08:39,521 --> 00:08:41,771
>> Chris: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT?

240
00:08:41,854 --> 00:08:43,646
>> TOO LATE!

241
00:08:43,729 --> 00:08:46,438
[ GUNSHOT ]
>> WHO'S BEEN PUTTING SCRUDS ON

242
00:08:46,521 --> 00:08:49,604
MY DINING TABLE?

243
00:08:49,688 --> 00:08:51,313
>> THESE HILLBILLIES IS NUTS!

244
00:08:51,396 --> 00:08:52,729
WHAT DO WE DO, CHRIS?

245
00:08:52,813 --> 00:08:56,521
>> Chris: UH...

246
00:08:56,604 --> 00:08:57,521
>> UNH!

247
00:09:02,438 --> 00:09:05,813
[ BODY THUDS ]
>> YOU KILLED MY BROTHER-IN-LAW,

248
00:09:05,896 --> 00:09:06,771
SCRUDS AND ALL!

249
00:09:06,854 --> 00:09:08,729
>> UH...

250
00:09:08,813 --> 00:09:09,771
OH, UH, HEART!

251
00:09:14,229 --> 00:09:15,563
>> THANK YOU, BOYS!

252
00:09:15,646 --> 00:09:16,313
MY NIGHTMARE'S OVER.

253
00:09:16,396 --> 00:09:20,271
YOU'RE WELCOME TO STAY THE
NIGHT.

254
00:09:22,438 --> 00:09:23,979
>> Chris: HEY, 'MERC?

255
00:09:24,063 --> 00:09:25,271
>> YEAH, CHRIS?

256
00:09:25,354 --> 00:09:27,396
>> Chris: THANKS FOR SAVING ME
IN THERE.

257
00:09:27,479 --> 00:09:28,688
>> NO WORRIES, AMIGO.

258
00:09:28,771 --> 00:09:30,646
TOMORROW'S A NEW DAY.

259
00:09:30,729 --> 00:09:35,313
AND NOW TO GO KREPLACH STEEP IN
LADY SLEEP.

260
00:09:35,396 --> 00:09:39,563
[ SNORING ]
PRESIDENT SAUL RUBINEK?

261
00:09:39,646 --> 00:09:41,396
[ SIRENS WAIL ]
>> COPS!

262
00:09:41,479 --> 00:09:42,104
>> POLICE!

263
00:09:42,188 --> 00:09:42,938
WE HAVE YOU SURROUNDED!

264
00:09:43,021 --> 00:09:43,813
>> I CAN'T GO BACK TO THE JOINT
AGAIN!

265
00:09:43,896 --> 00:09:45,063
I CAN'T!

266
00:09:45,146 --> 00:09:48,646
CHRIS, I NEED YOU TO DO ME A
SOLID AND TURN ME INTO A LIQUID!

267
00:09:48,729 --> 00:09:49,521
>> Chris: WHAT?

268
00:09:49,604 --> 00:09:51,188
>> DEATH PUNCH ME, CHRIS!

269
00:09:51,271 --> 00:09:52,813
YOU KNOW IT'S THE ONLY WAY!

270
00:09:52,896 --> 00:09:54,188
>> Chris: OH, NO, NO...

271
00:09:54,271 --> 00:09:56,146
DON'T MAKE ME DO THAT TO YOU.

272
00:09:56,229 --> 00:09:58,479
>> PLEASE, I'M NOTHING BUT A
STINKIN' TURD.

273
00:09:58,563 --> 00:10:01,521
THE WORLD WILL BE BETTER OFF
WITHOUT ME.

274
00:10:01,604 --> 00:10:03,188
>> Chris: OKAY.

275
00:10:03,271 --> 00:10:04,396
I'M GONNA MISS YOU, PAL.

276
00:10:04,479 --> 00:10:06,563
>> I'LL MISS YOU TOO, CHRIS.

277
00:10:10,938 --> 00:10:13,271
I'M COMING, MA!

278
00:10:13,354 --> 00:10:15,188
[ EAGLE SCREECHES ]
>> Susie: DID HE FALL FOR IT?

279
00:10:22,979 --> 00:10:24,063
DID HE THINK IT WAS THE COPS?

280
00:10:24,146 --> 00:10:24,729
IS HE DEAD?

281
00:10:24,813 --> 00:10:25,813
>> Chris: I DON'T KNOW, SUSIE.

282
00:10:25,896 --> 00:10:27,271
WHY DON'T YOU TAKE HIS PULSE?

283
00:10:27,354 --> 00:10:29,229
>> WHOA. SOMEONE FORGOT TO SAY
"MARSHMALLOW."

284
00:10:29,313 --> 00:10:30,646
>> Chris: TRISH, YOU MADE IT.

285
00:10:30,729 --> 00:10:32,729
>> Susie: GOOD THING I STILL HAD
MY SIRENS AND THAT FARMER LET

286
00:10:32,813 --> 00:10:34,396
YOU CALL ME BEFORE AMERICA GOT
HERE.

287
00:10:34,479 --> 00:10:35,479
WE SHOULD GO THANK HIM.

288
00:10:35,563 --> 00:10:36,813
>> Chris: HE'S PROBABLY...

289
00:10:36,896 --> 00:10:38,396
SLEEPING.

290
00:10:38,479 --> 00:10:42,396
>> [ GROANING ]
[ BABY CRYING ]

291
00:10:42,479 --> 00:10:44,271
>> AH, IT'S A BOY.

292
00:10:44,354 --> 00:10:47,271
WE SHALL CALL IT "AMERICA."

293
00:10:47,354 --> 00:10:49,396
[ BABY CRYING ]

294
00:10:51,646 --> 00:10:57,813
>> ♪ GENTLEMEN
♪ I KNOW YOU'LL BE BACK AGAIN

295
00:10:57,896 --> 00:11:06,729
♪ AND BRING ME THE SWEETNESS OF
YOUR SMILE ANOTHER DAY ♪

296
00:11:06,813 --> 00:11:13,063
♪ LAUGHING HARD
♪ WARM KISSES IN THE PARK