1
00:00:01,241 --> 00:00:02,793
Previously on
Sister Wives...
2
00:00:02,793 --> 00:00:05,551
Do you understand
that you lie?
3
00:00:05,551 --> 00:00:07,379
That's the reason I call you
"the Teflon queen".
4
00:00:07,379 --> 00:00:09,620
- I don't lie.
- 'Cause you're lying about
what has happened...
5
00:00:09,620 --> 00:00:10,862
- It's wild--
- ...and what's been
going on.
6
00:00:10,862 --> 00:00:12,137
It's wild to me
that you think I lie,
7
00:00:12,137 --> 00:00:14,827
because I think
you're manipulating.
8
00:00:14,827 --> 00:00:18,862
I got into this conversation
wanting to keep it logical,
9
00:00:18,862 --> 00:00:21,137
and I figured we would
take this step by step.
10
00:00:21,137 --> 00:00:24,793
Really, truly, I don't think
he-- he-he's looking
for an excuse.
11
00:00:24,793 --> 00:00:27,137
Tell the world
how I've lied,
12
00:00:27,137 --> 00:00:29,896
how I've manipulated,
how I've done you wrong.
13
00:00:30,965 --> 00:00:32,448
I don't know what there is
to talk about.
14
00:00:32,448 --> 00:00:35,068
Janelle not coming over
on Christmas?
15
00:00:35,068 --> 00:00:36,827
- No.
- I thought you were
talking to her
16
00:00:36,827 --> 00:00:37,862
about this and stuff.
17
00:00:37,862 --> 00:00:40,275
Oh no, we didn't talk.
We yelled at each other.
18
00:00:40,275 --> 00:00:42,827
So, in my mind,
he is out of the house.
19
00:01:12,206 --> 00:01:14,413
I'm gonna have Aspyn and Mitch
Mykelti and Tony over
20
00:01:14,413 --> 00:01:16,896
and we're going to paint
on canvases
21
00:01:16,896 --> 00:01:18,758
pictures for Valentine's day.
22
00:01:18,758 --> 00:01:20,482
Okay, there are these
big brushes,
23
00:01:20,482 --> 00:01:23,103
I don't how big of a brush
you need.
24
00:01:23,103 --> 00:01:25,034
- And there's this.
- Here's another big one.
25
00:01:25,034 --> 00:01:27,000
There's that, and then...
26
00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:28,724
Tony, if you wanna do
a base coat,
27
00:01:28,724 --> 00:01:31,655
you can.
28
00:01:31,655 --> 00:01:34,689
Listen, I-I love going to,
like, paint and wine nights.
29
00:01:34,689 --> 00:01:37,344
It's just super fun,
it's just a blast.
30
00:01:37,344 --> 00:01:38,758
Um, I don't know
what are we painting.
31
00:01:38,758 --> 00:01:40,241
Mom, what are we painting?
32
00:01:40,241 --> 00:01:42,241
It's a Valentine's day theme.
33
00:01:42,241 --> 00:01:45,000
It's just a tree
with hearts on it.
34
00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:46,896
Tony and Mykelti are
doing fantastic.
35
00:01:46,896 --> 00:01:48,724
So, they have Avalon now.
36
00:01:48,724 --> 00:01:51,034
It's fun to watch your kids
become a couple.
37
00:01:51,034 --> 00:01:53,241
It's even more fun
to watch your kids
38
00:01:53,241 --> 00:01:55,655
and their spouse
become parents.
39
00:01:55,655 --> 00:01:58,344
Tony is an adorable dad
with Avalon.
40
00:01:58,344 --> 00:01:59,344
It's adorable.
41
00:01:59,344 --> 00:02:01,965
She is the busiest kid.
42
00:02:01,965 --> 00:02:04,241
She's really the love
of my life.
43
00:02:04,241 --> 00:02:06,448
'Kay, everyone needs
to get their palettes
44
00:02:06,448 --> 00:02:10,103
and put on your palette
white, black, all your colors.
45
00:02:10,103 --> 00:02:13,344
The colors are black,
blue, orange
46
00:02:13,344 --> 00:02:15,379
- white and red.
- What do we need the most of?
47
00:02:15,379 --> 00:02:17,620
I don't know,
I've never done this before.
48
00:02:17,620 --> 00:02:19,689
Aspyn and Mitch have been
married for a couple years.
49
00:02:20,862 --> 00:02:23,448
It's awesome to see
how well they do
50
00:02:23,448 --> 00:02:26,344
and how well they communicate
and work things out
51
00:02:26,344 --> 00:02:29,413
and they're just
a great couple
to be around.
52
00:02:29,413 --> 00:02:30,379
So, you guys excited?
53
00:02:35,896 --> 00:02:37,586
You can have Avalon
for your Valentine.
54
00:02:37,586 --> 00:02:39,448
I am gonna have Avalon
for my Valentine.
55
00:02:39,448 --> 00:02:41,275
So, you guys can go out
on a date.
56
00:02:41,275 --> 00:02:44,103
Valentine's Day was something
that was just always--
57
00:02:44,103 --> 00:02:45,586
we didn't know what to do.
58
00:02:45,586 --> 00:02:47,482
It's not a really
polygamous-friendly holiday,
59
00:02:47,482 --> 00:02:49,827
if you can imagine,
it's like...
60
00:02:49,827 --> 00:02:52,827
Um, you know,
I'm not planning much
for Valentine's day this year.
61
00:02:52,827 --> 00:02:54,793
Kody and I definitely
not in communication.
62
00:02:54,793 --> 00:02:57,482
Plus, if we were,
I wouldn't really
wanna do Valentine's day
63
00:02:57,482 --> 00:02:59,965
with him or with the family.
64
00:02:59,965 --> 00:03:02,862
Valentine's day
is a turkey holiday
65
00:03:02,862 --> 00:03:04,517
for a plural family.
66
00:03:05,137 --> 00:03:06,896
This year, it's just...
67
00:03:07,344 --> 00:03:09,034
Holy crap,
68
00:03:09,034 --> 00:03:12,103
complicated and hard
and horrible.
69
00:03:12,103 --> 00:03:15,586
I'm not doing a damn thing
for Valentine's day.
70
00:03:15,586 --> 00:03:18,517
Listen, you have to have
a Valentine
71
00:03:18,517 --> 00:03:21,034
to do Valentine's day.
72
00:03:21,034 --> 00:03:23,931
We-- I painted this, like,
so, one that I did
with Ysabel,
73
00:03:23,931 --> 00:03:26,172
I mean, they all end up
in the garbage eventually.
74
00:03:26,172 --> 00:03:27,379
- I can make--
- Oh, that's sad.
75
00:03:27,379 --> 00:03:28,965
Dad and I did one together,
76
00:03:28,965 --> 00:03:30,413
which...
77
00:03:30,413 --> 00:03:31,586
Did you keep that one?
78
00:03:31,586 --> 00:03:32,827
Um, no, didn't keep that one.
79
00:03:32,827 --> 00:03:34,068
- Do you still have it?
- Nope.
80
00:03:34,068 --> 00:03:36,482
- I did not--
- Is it framed
upstairs somewhere?
81
00:03:36,482 --> 00:03:38,413
And you're waiting to...
82
00:03:38,413 --> 00:03:40,793
- be in love again?
- Nope.
83
00:03:44,000 --> 00:03:45,586
If mom kept
something from dad?
84
00:03:48,379 --> 00:03:49,689
Yeah.
85
00:03:49,689 --> 00:03:51,344
Yeah, Kody wasn't very--
86
00:03:51,344 --> 00:03:53,448
There were some times
where he would, like,
87
00:03:53,448 --> 00:03:55,862
bring over
a Valentine's day gift.
88
00:03:55,862 --> 00:03:58,206
I got vases to happy--
89
00:04:00,448 --> 00:04:02,931
- Hey, beautiful!
- Give that
to my mom.
90
00:04:02,931 --> 00:04:05,137
Sometimes,
he would just give it
too you there at night
91
00:04:05,137 --> 00:04:06,310
with everybody there.
92
00:04:06,310 --> 00:04:08,310
So, I should have
more sympathy and empathy
for Kody.
93
00:04:08,310 --> 00:04:10,137
But I didn't,
not really.
94
00:04:10,137 --> 00:04:11,965
Now, he just has Robyn
so he's probably fine.
95
00:04:11,965 --> 00:04:13,413
Oh, that was snarky.
96
00:04:14,103 --> 00:04:15,793
That was rude.
97
00:04:15,793 --> 00:04:17,793
Are you gonna
move on and find
a new husband?
98
00:04:17,793 --> 00:04:20,241
- Yes.
- When?
99
00:04:20,241 --> 00:04:21,724
So, Truely--
this is not ready,
100
00:04:21,724 --> 00:04:23,379
and I'll probably talk to
Truely about it and see.
101
00:04:23,379 --> 00:04:25,517
But I do have to tell you guys something.
102
00:04:25,517 --> 00:04:28,827
So, I've been talking
to a matchmaker.
103
00:04:28,827 --> 00:04:30,344
Like,
the professional kind?
104
00:04:30,344 --> 00:04:32,241
- The famous--
- Like the professional kind, yeah.
105
00:04:35,896 --> 00:04:36,931
I'm nervous.
106
00:04:38,448 --> 00:04:41,275
I'm super nervous
about dating, um...
107
00:04:44,413 --> 00:04:46,310
Super nervous about dating.
108
00:04:46,310 --> 00:04:48,448
And I don't--
I'm not ready.
109
00:04:48,448 --> 00:04:50,172
I didn't have a great,
intimate marriage.
110
00:04:50,172 --> 00:04:51,310
At all.
111
00:04:51,310 --> 00:04:53,724
And so, the idea of
putting myself
out there again,
112
00:04:53,724 --> 00:04:55,000
just, no.
113
00:04:55,000 --> 00:04:56,344
No, I'm not ready.
114
00:04:57,551 --> 00:04:58,620
For his body,
115
00:04:59,172 --> 00:05:00,827
I want bold tattoos
116
00:05:00,827 --> 00:05:03,448
and driving a motorcycle,
that's the vision.
117
00:05:03,448 --> 00:05:06,034
Just saying,
the tattoos will be fantastic.
118
00:05:06,034 --> 00:05:08,413
Just ca--
that's pretty much...
119
00:05:08,413 --> 00:05:10,586
Kody's opposite,
not on purpose, but maybe.
120
00:05:10,586 --> 00:05:13,000
I'm just looking for something
that Kody never was
121
00:05:13,000 --> 00:05:15,793
because I--
I just want someone
who's a partner,
122
00:05:15,793 --> 00:05:18,275
a good communicator,
someone who's funny,
123
00:05:18,275 --> 00:05:20,241
I'd love a sense of humor.
124
00:05:20,241 --> 00:05:22,758
Um, I told them
about everything, like,
125
00:05:22,758 --> 00:05:25,517
whole big family
and everything,
and they said, "You know,
126
00:05:25,517 --> 00:05:27,448
for-- first,
why don't we lead with
127
00:05:27,448 --> 00:05:29,689
that you have six kids
but you have three grandkids.
128
00:05:29,689 --> 00:05:32,241
I told my matchmaker everything,
129
00:05:32,241 --> 00:05:35,206
from being public
to being a polygamist,
130
00:05:35,206 --> 00:05:37,310
to leaving to my kids.
131
00:05:37,310 --> 00:05:39,000
They might as well know everything.
132
00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:41,344
They might as well,
and then they can
kinda pick and choose
133
00:05:41,344 --> 00:05:45,000
what do you think would be
a good thing to start with.
134
00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:48,103
Well, let's just start
that you're a female
and you're 50,
135
00:05:48,103 --> 00:05:50,931
and you have some kids,
and that's it.
136
00:05:50,931 --> 00:05:52,931
That's it,
that's all they need to know.
137
00:05:52,931 --> 00:05:55,965
So, I am definitely going
for a monogamous this time.
138
00:05:55,965 --> 00:05:58,517
- I'm done with
the polygamy thing, just--
- Good.
139
00:05:58,517 --> 00:06:01,862
So, the issue is like,
I feel like, with polygamy,
once you try it once,
140
00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:03,310
- really, what's the point
after that?
- You'll try again?
141
00:06:06,068 --> 00:06:07,724
Not for me.
Uh, it did,
142
00:06:07,724 --> 00:06:10,000
I'm not gonna say it didn't,
'cause I'm not gonna regret
where I am,
143
00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:12,482
- you know?
- That's good, 'cause
you got me from polygamy.
144
00:06:12,482 --> 00:06:14,482
Right, all of you guys
are because of polygamy.
145
00:06:14,482 --> 00:06:16,482
So I don't regret it at all.
146
00:06:16,482 --> 00:06:18,310
It took me a long time
to leave.
147
00:06:18,310 --> 00:06:20,689
It took me years to leave.
148
00:06:20,689 --> 00:06:24,034
So, leaving our church,
I was going to do it classy,
149
00:06:24,034 --> 00:06:25,965
leaving my marriage,
I was gonna do it classy
150
00:06:25,965 --> 00:06:27,620
and I was gonna do it
without bitterness.
151
00:06:27,620 --> 00:06:29,241
That doesn't mean
that sometimes I'm frustrated
152
00:06:29,241 --> 00:06:31,896
and sometimes I'm angry
and sometimes I'm disappointed
and I...
153
00:06:31,896 --> 00:06:33,862
don't like all of
the control that happens.
154
00:06:33,862 --> 00:06:36,034
I'm still gonna be
as classy as possible.
155
00:06:36,034 --> 00:06:37,172
We'll go on several dates.
156
00:06:37,172 --> 00:06:38,448
- Like, whoever,
and if it doesn't work...
- Yeah.
157
00:06:38,448 --> 00:06:39,758
...I'll go on some dates again.
158
00:06:39,758 --> 00:06:41,793
But it's only gonna be
with people who
159
00:06:41,793 --> 00:06:42,931
I can trust around.
160
00:06:43,517 --> 00:06:44,172
Yeah?
161
00:06:46,758 --> 00:06:48,586
Tony, did you try
all the ice cream flavors?
162
00:06:48,586 --> 00:06:49,724
- Yeah.
- He did, mom.
163
00:06:49,724 --> 00:06:51,931
Tony tried every single
ice cream flavor out there.
164
00:06:52,551 --> 00:06:53,482
- Twice.
- Yes.
165
00:06:53,482 --> 00:06:54,655
Before he settled on me.
166
00:06:55,379 --> 00:06:56,275
It's just...
167
00:06:57,241 --> 00:06:59,724
He is just a little [bleep].
168
00:06:59,724 --> 00:07:02,586
- I don't know--
- Every single ice cream flavor
out there
169
00:07:02,586 --> 00:07:05,310
has been sampled
by my husband, mother.
170
00:07:05,310 --> 00:07:07,931
Okay, well I don't know
if I need to sample
all the ice cream flavors.
171
00:07:07,931 --> 00:07:11,517
Tony is not afraid to
bring up things
172
00:07:11,517 --> 00:07:13,068
that are...
173
00:07:14,379 --> 00:07:16,275
uncomfortable?
174
00:07:16,275 --> 00:07:20,275
No, I will not be sampling
all the ice cream flavors. No.
175
00:07:20,275 --> 00:07:23,275
So, I was married to someone
who apparently wasn't
physically attracted to me.
176
00:07:23,275 --> 00:07:24,896
And the biggest reason
why I haven't dated
177
00:07:24,896 --> 00:07:27,034
- is because--
- I don't--
I don't get that.
178
00:07:27,034 --> 00:07:28,793
The-The biggest reason
I haven't dated
179
00:07:28,793 --> 00:07:30,275
is because,
it sounds stupid,
180
00:07:30,275 --> 00:07:32,413
it honestly is,
it's been hard
to get over that.
181
00:07:32,413 --> 00:07:35,034
- How did you--
- The thing is,
you're gorgeous.
182
00:07:35,034 --> 00:07:38,758
The biggest reason
I left Kody was...
183
00:07:38,758 --> 00:07:42,758
I didn't want to be
in a marriage where
my kids would know
184
00:07:42,758 --> 00:07:45,000
that I was married to someone
who wasn't attracted to me.
185
00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:48,172
So, leaving was the choice.
186
00:07:48,172 --> 00:07:49,689
'Cause I wasn't gonna
stay in a marriage like that
187
00:07:49,689 --> 00:07:52,275
and I wasn't gonna show
my kids that
that was acceptable,
188
00:07:52,275 --> 00:07:53,206
'cause it's not.
189
00:07:54,827 --> 00:07:56,689
It's real hard to get
beyond that in my head.
190
00:07:56,689 --> 00:07:58,034
- Right.
- Yup.
191
00:07:58,034 --> 00:07:59,620
And so I'm scared.
192
00:07:59,620 --> 00:08:02,000
And so, I know we talked
about going to a bar,
193
00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:03,379
and we talked about
all that stuff,
194
00:08:03,379 --> 00:08:05,724
I'm not--
I'm not ready, I'm scared.
195
00:08:05,724 --> 00:08:07,586
- It'll take--
- He's the only guy
I've ever kissed.
196
00:08:07,586 --> 00:08:09,655
Oh my God,
what if I suck at kissing?
197
00:08:09,655 --> 00:08:11,862
What if I suck
at everything like that?
198
00:08:11,862 --> 00:08:14,620
I don't know.
I know that someone
didn't like it.
199
00:08:16,206 --> 00:08:17,655
Do you see
why it's scary?
200
00:08:17,655 --> 00:08:19,896
Do you see
why it is terrifying?
201
00:08:19,896 --> 00:08:21,620
It is terrifying.
202
00:08:21,620 --> 00:08:23,551
So, I understand
you're, like,
203
00:08:23,551 --> 00:08:26,000
you're scared and stuff because...
204
00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:29,965
I mean, you were married
for 25-ish years,
205
00:08:29,965 --> 00:08:32,413
and the guy
you were married with
was never into it
206
00:08:32,413 --> 00:08:33,482
and that sucks.
207
00:08:33,482 --> 00:08:35,931
But, that's his problem,
not yours.
208
00:08:35,931 --> 00:08:39,103
It's equal, scary and exciting
all the time, both.
209
00:08:39,103 --> 00:08:40,655
'Cause yes, I want to date,
210
00:08:40,655 --> 00:08:43,000
but oh my God,
no that sounds really, really,
really terrifying,
211
00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:46,620
scary and--
vulnerable, and-and no
212
00:08:46,620 --> 00:08:48,482
and but still,
at the same time yes,
213
00:08:48,482 --> 00:08:50,344
gosh yes, see?
It's a lot.
214
00:08:50,344 --> 00:08:51,896
There's a lot going on.
215
00:08:51,896 --> 00:08:53,620
Okay, I am gonna say...
216
00:08:53,620 --> 00:08:55,724
- No, it's true.
- Thank you for your guys'
support.
217
00:08:55,724 --> 00:08:57,000
- Absolutely...
- Mmm.
218
00:08:57,517 --> 00:08:58,620
I really like my kids.
219
00:08:59,241 --> 00:09:01,758
I really like them a lot.
220
00:09:01,758 --> 00:09:03,413
They're extremely supportive
221
00:09:03,413 --> 00:09:06,068
and good and kind and...
222
00:09:07,275 --> 00:09:08,620
wanting the best for me.
223
00:09:08,620 --> 00:09:10,965
Okay, oh, God, can I just
get behind you guys. Yup.
224
00:09:13,379 --> 00:09:16,206
I'm not definitely getting
full scoops of ice cream,
225
00:09:16,206 --> 00:09:19,103
I might go and do, like, the,
"Can I have a spoon
of that flavor",
226
00:09:19,103 --> 00:09:21,241
but just a spoon,
you know, maybe.
227
00:09:21,241 --> 00:09:23,344
But never a full scoop
of any flavor.
228
00:09:23,344 --> 00:09:24,724
That's way too much.
229
00:09:24,724 --> 00:09:26,068
Way too much
of anything.
230
00:09:26,068 --> 00:09:27,275
I don't know!
231
00:09:27,275 --> 00:09:30,000
Too much, bit too much.
I don't know.
232
00:09:34,379 --> 00:09:36,103
So, I haven't said
anything to Robyn yet
233
00:09:36,103 --> 00:09:37,965
about what my plans are.
234
00:09:37,965 --> 00:09:40,000
So, I'm planning on moving
my clothing business.
235
00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:42,655
I need to let Robyn know
236
00:09:42,655 --> 00:09:44,862
'cause I feel like
she's the only one
who's really gonna care.
237
00:09:44,862 --> 00:09:46,827
This is done?
Like, you've made
your decision?
238
00:09:46,827 --> 00:09:50,551
It causes me a lot of anxiety,
but yes.
239
00:09:50,551 --> 00:09:53,206
I have
an appointment
to meet with Kody.
240
00:09:53,206 --> 00:09:55,620
I have not seen him
in about six weeks.
241
00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:07,344
So, I'm gonna
go over and talk to Kody
242
00:10:07,344 --> 00:10:09,137
so, this is the first time...
243
00:10:11,068 --> 00:10:15,793
that we're gonna really talk
since out big fight
before Christmas.
244
00:10:15,793 --> 00:10:18,206
- You act like this is
not your fault.
- Do you want
245
00:10:18,206 --> 00:10:19,896
- this relationship
between you and I to work?
- I don't know, do you?
246
00:10:19,896 --> 00:10:22,655
Because when you say
"choose your loyalties,
247
00:10:22,655 --> 00:10:24,103
choose between me
and your children."
248
00:10:24,103 --> 00:10:26,655
Now you are literally gaslighting.
249
00:10:26,655 --> 00:10:28,413
- I am not.
- I was only asking
250
00:10:28,413 --> 00:10:31,413
- everybody to obey the rules
of our home.
- I--
251
00:10:31,413 --> 00:10:33,965
I was always just
really quick to want
the conflict behind me
252
00:10:33,965 --> 00:10:38,551
so I would just be like,
"Okay", and we would never
resolve anything.
253
00:10:38,551 --> 00:10:40,758
We would just, sort of,
pick up where we left off
254
00:10:40,758 --> 00:10:42,724
and smooth over
and whatever,
255
00:10:42,724 --> 00:10:44,620
and I have realized,
this time,
256
00:10:44,620 --> 00:10:48,655
it's just not working
for me anymore, I really...
257
00:10:48,655 --> 00:10:50,965
wanna be treated differently, um...
258
00:10:50,965 --> 00:10:53,586
I want some more things
out of a relationship.
259
00:10:54,965 --> 00:10:56,206
Can we do that with ours?
260
00:10:56,206 --> 00:10:59,206
It would be stupid
to throw away 30 years
or whatever, but,
261
00:10:59,655 --> 00:11:00,724
I don't know.
262
00:11:00,724 --> 00:11:03,241
I really just don't know
if we really can fix that.
263
00:11:13,034 --> 00:11:14,724
- Hello!
- Mornin'.
264
00:11:14,724 --> 00:11:15,896
How are you?
265
00:11:15,896 --> 00:11:18,137
- Fabulous.
- Good.
266
00:11:18,137 --> 00:11:20,758
So, my best friend Jenn
runs the B&B for me.
267
00:11:20,758 --> 00:11:23,655
So, today we're gonna be
talking a little bit about
268
00:11:23,655 --> 00:11:26,206
some of the plans that...
269
00:11:26,206 --> 00:11:27,896
we've kind of
been discussing.
270
00:11:27,896 --> 00:11:30,275
I have to show you something
that somebody brought.
271
00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:33,517
- Or left.
- For me? No.
272
00:11:33,517 --> 00:11:38,724
I mean, her number one
job title is BFF,
bestie extraordinaire.
273
00:11:38,724 --> 00:11:40,172
We're gonna have to
274
00:11:40,172 --> 00:11:41,965
have something
a little bit official
275
00:11:41,965 --> 00:11:44,172
because that might look weird
on a business card.
276
00:11:45,655 --> 00:11:47,103
Check this out.
277
00:11:47,103 --> 00:11:49,344
One of our guests
left that.
278
00:11:49,344 --> 00:11:51,724
- Aw.
- Isn't that sweet?
279
00:11:52,344 --> 00:11:54,275
I do love that.
280
00:11:56,827 --> 00:12:00,310
One of the guests
left this pillow
281
00:12:00,310 --> 00:12:04,068
with a picture of me
and my mom on it.
282
00:12:04,068 --> 00:12:07,482
It was very sweet,
you know, lot of people
knew my mom.
283
00:12:08,586 --> 00:12:11,034
Like, she was
the kind of person
284
00:12:11,034 --> 00:12:13,000
that, if you're around her,
285
00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:14,448
you were all that mattered.
286
00:12:15,724 --> 00:12:17,862
- Sweet.
- Oh my God,
it's been almost a year.
287
00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:19,034
Almost a year.
288
00:12:20,965 --> 00:12:24,103
Nope, not gonna cry,
but I love it, I love it.
289
00:12:24,103 --> 00:12:28,206
My mom loved
living here at the B&B.
290
00:12:28,206 --> 00:12:30,655
She was like,
so at home.
291
00:12:30,655 --> 00:12:32,655
She absolutely loved it.
292
00:12:34,551 --> 00:12:38,241
So, I haven't said
anything to Robyn yet
about what my plans are.
293
00:12:38,241 --> 00:12:40,034
I wanted to
a couple weeks ago,
294
00:12:40,034 --> 00:12:42,965
like, really, there's no time
that's gonna be good.
295
00:12:42,965 --> 00:12:45,275
So, I'm planning on moving
my clothing business
296
00:12:45,275 --> 00:12:48,068
from Flagstaff up here
to the B&B.
297
00:12:48,068 --> 00:12:50,931
Um, I need to let Robyn know
298
00:12:50,931 --> 00:12:53,517
'cause I feel like
she's the only one
who's really gonna care
299
00:12:53,517 --> 00:12:57,758
and is honestly gonna
kinda have a problem with it.
300
00:12:57,758 --> 00:13:00,137
So, then, like, this is done?
Like, you've made
your decision?
301
00:13:00,137 --> 00:13:02,620
- You what you're going to do
like, for real?
- Yeah.
302
00:13:02,620 --> 00:13:05,448
It causes me a lot of anxiety,
but yes.
303
00:13:05,448 --> 00:13:07,551
I'm going to
304
00:13:07,551 --> 00:13:09,103
move the clothing up here.
305
00:13:10,586 --> 00:13:13,034
So that I can be here
more often,
306
00:13:13,034 --> 00:13:15,379
you can help me
with that part of it.
307
00:13:15,379 --> 00:13:16,793
I will totally help you
with that.
308
00:13:16,793 --> 00:13:20,172
- 'Cause I-- Yes, yes.
- During school hours,
you've got me.
309
00:13:20,172 --> 00:13:24,793
I've been
best friends with Meri
for about ten-ish years.
310
00:13:24,793 --> 00:13:28,551
We met because she hired me
as a professional killer.
311
00:13:28,551 --> 00:13:31,586
And so, I was
murder-for-hire
for a few years
312
00:13:31,586 --> 00:13:33,310
and we just maintained
our friendship through that.
313
00:13:36,517 --> 00:13:38,103
It's true.
314
00:13:38,103 --> 00:13:40,724
My relationship with Jenn
is just a lot of fun.
315
00:13:40,724 --> 00:13:43,586
We know how to laugh
and have a good time.
316
00:13:43,586 --> 00:13:46,758
In Las Vegas,
I owned a pest control company
317
00:13:46,758 --> 00:13:50,137
and so she hired
my pest control company
318
00:13:50,137 --> 00:13:53,241
and I provided
pest control services
319
00:13:53,241 --> 00:13:57,551
for all the homes
and just became friends
with her through that.
320
00:13:57,551 --> 00:13:59,344
There's a lot going on,
but at the same time,
321
00:13:59,344 --> 00:14:01,482
like, I think she's going to understand.
322
00:14:01,482 --> 00:14:03,586
You're-You're only
gonna be here
323
00:14:03,586 --> 00:14:06,413
- like, part-time,
you'll still be going back.
- Yeah.
324
00:14:06,413 --> 00:14:09,517
So, I'd like my relationship
with Kody to get to a place
325
00:14:09,517 --> 00:14:11,896
where we have, like,
a good marriage relationship.
326
00:14:11,896 --> 00:14:13,310
But, that's not where it is
right now,
327
00:14:13,310 --> 00:14:15,275
and I feel like
when I tell him
328
00:14:15,275 --> 00:14:17,482
I'm gonna be moving
my business up to the B&B,
329
00:14:17,482 --> 00:14:20,482
he's going to
interpret that as,
330
00:14:20,482 --> 00:14:22,931
that I am done
with this relationship.
331
00:14:22,931 --> 00:14:24,344
And that's not
where I am.
332
00:14:24,344 --> 00:14:26,379
I'm-- purely selfishly,
I love this,
333
00:14:26,379 --> 00:14:28,758
- because, like,
now you're here.
- Oh, trust me,
334
00:14:28,758 --> 00:14:31,103
- I love it too.
- Like, we're back
in the same town
335
00:14:31,103 --> 00:14:32,724
- for the first time
since Vegas.
- I know.
336
00:14:32,724 --> 00:14:34,586
- So, this is
big for me.
- I know.
337
00:14:34,586 --> 00:14:37,275
Jenn and I have been friends
for, like, so long.
338
00:14:37,275 --> 00:14:38,551
She's really been there
for me.
339
00:14:38,551 --> 00:14:42,586
She was around when I
did the legal divorce
340
00:14:42,586 --> 00:14:44,586
so that Kody and Robyn
could get married
341
00:14:44,586 --> 00:14:46,068
and he could adopt
the kids.
342
00:14:46,068 --> 00:14:48,000
She was around...
343
00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:50,000
and helped me figure out
a lot of stuff
344
00:14:50,000 --> 00:14:52,068
with the whole
catfishing situation.
345
00:14:52,068 --> 00:14:54,482
Jenn very much knows
her boundaries,
346
00:14:54,482 --> 00:14:58,137
and one of those is
she's not gonna go out
and talk about
347
00:14:58,137 --> 00:14:59,896
me or my family.
348
00:14:59,896 --> 00:15:01,551
Have you done anything
in the carriage house?
349
00:15:01,551 --> 00:15:04,586
I haven't been out there
since it started to snow.
350
00:15:04,586 --> 00:15:07,793
The carriage house
has a lot of stuff in it.
351
00:15:07,793 --> 00:15:11,586
I need to figure out
cleaning that out
352
00:15:11,586 --> 00:15:13,310
and what to do
with all the stuff
353
00:15:13,310 --> 00:15:16,310
because that's where
I plan on putting
the clothing business
354
00:15:16,310 --> 00:15:17,965
once I move it up/
355
00:15:17,965 --> 00:15:19,931
- Do you wanna go look at it?
- Yeah, we should go
look at it
356
00:15:19,931 --> 00:15:21,620
and figure out a plan.
357
00:15:21,620 --> 00:15:23,275
It's gonna be cold out there,
are you ready?
358
00:15:24,793 --> 00:15:26,862
- I don't care about the cold.
- I-- you have to visualize,
359
00:15:26,862 --> 00:15:29,103
- like, you have to see it.
- I know I need to.
360
00:15:29,103 --> 00:15:30,517
- There's just so much--
- We'll just take garbage bags
361
00:15:30,517 --> 00:15:32,103
and we'll just start
throwing crap in.
362
00:15:32,103 --> 00:15:33,655
- Oh, that'll be fun.
- And then, it'll be fine.
363
00:15:33,655 --> 00:15:35,068
Even when it's cleaned out,
364
00:15:35,068 --> 00:15:37,103
it probably won't fit
in here very well.
365
00:15:37,103 --> 00:15:38,827
I'm gonna
have to do some...
366
00:15:39,517 --> 00:15:41,517
changing for sure.
367
00:15:41,517 --> 00:15:43,931
'Cause there's even stuff
out there too, like,
368
00:15:43,931 --> 00:15:47,448
there's-there's a lot of stuff
that's gonna have to be
moved for that to...
369
00:15:47,448 --> 00:15:49,344
- be the space
you want it to be.
- Turn into the clothing--
370
00:15:51,034 --> 00:15:52,931
- Okay, let's go look at that.
- Okay.
371
00:15:52,931 --> 00:15:56,172
I'm not looking forward
to going and looking at it because...
372
00:15:56,931 --> 00:15:59,206
I know what needs to be done,
373
00:15:59,206 --> 00:16:01,103
and it's very overwhelming
374
00:16:01,103 --> 00:16:04,344
and it just a big,
like, a hot mess.
375
00:16:04,344 --> 00:16:08,068
Like, it is...
such a mess, there's...
376
00:16:08,068 --> 00:16:10,482
so much that's gonna
have to be done to this
377
00:16:10,482 --> 00:16:12,620
to make it workable
for my business.
378
00:16:16,482 --> 00:16:17,344
- Hi.
- Hi.
379
00:16:17,344 --> 00:16:18,586
- How's it going?
- Good.
380
00:16:18,586 --> 00:16:19,862
Long time no see.
381
00:16:19,862 --> 00:16:22,724
- Yeah.
- Are you gonna
give me a hug?
382
00:16:22,724 --> 00:16:26,034
I have not really missed Kody,
I'm not pining for him.
383
00:16:26,034 --> 00:16:28,034
Didn't go really good
last time we talked.
384
00:16:28,482 --> 00:16:29,310
Nope.
385
00:16:30,068 --> 00:16:31,758
That's an understatement.
386
00:16:39,862 --> 00:16:42,206
I have
an appointment
to meet with Kody.
387
00:16:42,206 --> 00:16:45,206
I have not seen him
since he blew up
388
00:16:45,206 --> 00:16:47,517
and walked out
of my apartment
right before Christmas.
389
00:16:52,344 --> 00:16:54,275
I have not really missed Kody,
390
00:16:54,275 --> 00:16:56,344
I mean, I missed him
but I didn't really
"miss" him.
391
00:16:56,344 --> 00:16:57,448
I'm not pining for him.
392
00:17:00,724 --> 00:17:02,379
About six weeks ago,
before Christmas,
393
00:17:02,379 --> 00:17:04,482
Janelle and I had
a major blow-up fight.
394
00:17:04,482 --> 00:17:06,275
We haven't seen
each other since.
395
00:17:06,275 --> 00:17:08,517
- Thank you.
- No problem.
396
00:17:08,517 --> 00:17:10,482
So,
we're gonna meet
for lunch
397
00:17:10,482 --> 00:17:12,586
and, sort of,
talk it out, I guess.
398
00:17:12,586 --> 00:17:15,517
- At this table.
- Thank you.
399
00:17:15,517 --> 00:17:16,517
- Hi.
- Hi.
400
00:17:16,517 --> 00:17:17,724
- How's it going?
- Good.
401
00:17:17,724 --> 00:17:19,000
Long time no see.
402
00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:21,241
- Yeah.
- Are you gonna
give me a hug?
403
00:17:23,689 --> 00:17:24,689
- How are ya?
- Good.
404
00:17:28,310 --> 00:17:31,206
Ooh, cold water.
405
00:17:31,206 --> 00:17:32,793
- Where's the waiter?
- It's okay, he'll be back
in a minute.
406
00:17:32,793 --> 00:17:33,620
Yeah.
407
00:17:34,068 --> 00:17:34,758
So...
408
00:17:36,241 --> 00:17:37,827
- How are ya?
- Good.
409
00:17:37,827 --> 00:17:39,655
Are you good?
410
00:17:39,655 --> 00:17:41,241
Yeah,
I mean, everything's okay.
411
00:17:41,241 --> 00:17:43,068
- Okay.
- So...
412
00:17:46,379 --> 00:17:47,344
I...
413
00:17:48,206 --> 00:17:49,620
- I mean-- Yeah.
- Now...
414
00:17:51,172 --> 00:17:53,275
Didn't go really good
last time we talked.
415
00:17:53,827 --> 00:17:54,758
Nope.
416
00:17:56,758 --> 00:17:58,206
That's an understatement.
417
00:17:59,448 --> 00:18:00,379
Well...
418
00:18:00,827 --> 00:18:02,137
I'm sorry.
419
00:18:02,137 --> 00:18:04,172
Well, we both did
our fair share of screaming.
420
00:18:04,172 --> 00:18:06,586
- Like--
- Well I'm-I'm embarrassed
by my behavior,
421
00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:08,724
but I'm also realizing
that, uh...
422
00:18:09,344 --> 00:18:10,620
Um...
423
00:18:10,620 --> 00:18:12,827
You don't have
a safe place to--
424
00:18:12,827 --> 00:18:14,827
a safe way to talk to me.
425
00:18:14,827 --> 00:18:16,137
The-- It's a little bit
of a blur,
426
00:18:16,137 --> 00:18:18,655
the last conversation,
'cause I was so shocked.
427
00:18:18,655 --> 00:18:20,965
So, he came in--
he was kinda angry
when he came in,
428
00:18:20,965 --> 00:18:22,620
he sort of had
that chip on his shoulder.
429
00:18:24,793 --> 00:18:25,517
Hey.
430
00:18:26,068 --> 00:18:27,586
It's winter out there.
431
00:18:27,586 --> 00:18:29,000
And all I was
gonna do
432
00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:31,586
was just establish
that we're doing Christmas separately.
433
00:18:32,586 --> 00:18:34,103
And the boys were asking
434
00:18:34,103 --> 00:18:35,758
if you thought that--
you've thought that
you would come over,
435
00:18:35,758 --> 00:18:37,413
- and I said
it wasn't optimistic.
- No--
436
00:18:37,413 --> 00:18:38,896
No, I'm not coming over.
437
00:18:38,896 --> 00:18:41,482
It's like, I have a house,
I have a place where
we would have Christmas.
438
00:18:42,241 --> 00:18:43,689
And he just lost it.
439
00:18:43,689 --> 00:18:46,310
- You act like this is
not your fault.
- Do you want this relationship
440
00:18:46,310 --> 00:18:47,793
- between you and I to work?
- I don't know, do you?
441
00:18:47,793 --> 00:18:50,482
Because when you say
"choose your loyalties,
442
00:18:50,482 --> 00:18:52,034
choose between me
and your children."
443
00:18:52,034 --> 00:18:54,448
Now you are literally gaslighting.
444
00:18:54,448 --> 00:18:56,103
- I am not.
- I was only asking
445
00:18:56,103 --> 00:18:59,068
- everybody to obey the rules
of our home.
- I--
446
00:18:59,068 --> 00:19:00,413
I-I felt just...
447
00:19:00,413 --> 00:19:03,448
Like I had just endured
two years of betrayal
from Janelle.
448
00:19:03,448 --> 00:19:05,620
I triggered so badly.
449
00:19:05,620 --> 00:19:08,000
I was just so angry.
450
00:19:08,344 --> 00:19:09,586
No.
451
00:19:09,586 --> 00:19:11,068
- You stay and talk.
- I'm done listening to you.
452
00:19:11,068 --> 00:19:13,482
- You stay and talk.
- I-- No.
453
00:19:13,482 --> 00:19:14,793
I'm not going to,
454
00:19:14,793 --> 00:19:17,379
- 'cause you're not listening.
- You're not listening to me.
455
00:19:17,379 --> 00:19:18,827
And I'm not going to.
456
00:19:18,827 --> 00:19:20,206
- Okay, so,
we're done?
- Goodbye.
457
00:19:20,206 --> 00:19:21,000
you!
458
00:19:24,965 --> 00:19:27,206
It was ugly.
459
00:19:27,896 --> 00:19:29,000
And it was sad.
460
00:19:30,827 --> 00:19:33,793
I mean, this divorce
is affecting me
461
00:19:33,793 --> 00:19:36,000
in every way.
462
00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:37,862
It's affecting
all my relationships.
463
00:19:38,517 --> 00:19:40,482
I realizing that I am...
464
00:19:41,068 --> 00:19:43,620
I am morphing,
465
00:19:43,620 --> 00:19:47,000
or transmuting
grief into anger.
466
00:19:48,241 --> 00:19:50,827
And, um,
I realize that I'm just--
467
00:19:50,827 --> 00:19:53,827
I'm just not a safe place
for you to have
a conversation.
468
00:19:54,586 --> 00:19:56,103
So, um--
469
00:19:56,103 --> 00:19:58,689
just, one trigger
after another,
just set me off.
470
00:20:00,172 --> 00:20:02,172
"Well, my relationship
with you is crap
471
00:20:02,172 --> 00:20:04,517
because I'm so angry
about this divorce."
472
00:20:04,517 --> 00:20:06,103
Well, be a man,
473
00:20:06,103 --> 00:20:10,241
separate your relationships
like you have for
our entire plural marriage,
474
00:20:10,241 --> 00:20:11,551
and pay attention here.
475
00:20:22,655 --> 00:20:23,620
Hmm.
476
00:20:26,379 --> 00:20:29,931
I-- I do think that I wanna
stay separated for now.
477
00:20:32,344 --> 00:20:33,896
Really?
You wanna stay separated?
478
00:20:33,896 --> 00:20:35,000
Yeah, I do.
479
00:20:40,413 --> 00:20:42,172
Uh, I'm--
I'm sort of surprised
480
00:20:42,172 --> 00:20:43,862
that she doesn't want
to try and reconcile,
481
00:20:43,862 --> 00:20:46,827
that she wants
to be separated.
482
00:20:46,827 --> 00:20:50,482
We've been separated
probably two or three times
in the past.
483
00:20:51,965 --> 00:20:55,827
I always felt like that was
because she couldn't manage
484
00:20:55,827 --> 00:20:57,689
the relationship
with her sister wives.
485
00:20:57,689 --> 00:21:00,413
I never felt like
that was over me
486
00:21:00,413 --> 00:21:01,827
but maybe I was wrong.
487
00:21:03,689 --> 00:21:06,344
I'm really, really
willing to do some counselling
488
00:21:06,344 --> 00:21:07,758
if we can find somebody.
489
00:21:07,758 --> 00:21:10,482
I think that's more fair,
Christine just
dropped this on me.
490
00:21:10,482 --> 00:21:13,931
I just know that I need to be
separate right now, you know.
491
00:21:14,517 --> 00:21:15,758
Okay.
492
00:21:15,758 --> 00:21:17,551
I mean, I still have
a lot of affection for you.
493
00:21:19,172 --> 00:21:21,758
Yeah, maybe some
counselling is a good idea.
494
00:21:21,758 --> 00:21:22,896
I...
495
00:21:22,896 --> 00:21:25,482
Other than
just that experience
496
00:21:25,482 --> 00:21:27,275
where I'm blowing up over
497
00:21:28,137 --> 00:21:30,793
really just, I guess, rejection,
498
00:21:30,793 --> 00:21:33,896
you guys are doing
Christmas without me,
it's, uh...
499
00:21:33,896 --> 00:21:35,275
- It's a--
- You know Christine and I
500
00:21:35,275 --> 00:21:36,896
didn't do Christmas
together, right?
501
00:21:36,896 --> 00:21:38,413
We did it separate
502
00:21:38,413 --> 00:21:40,137
and she came after.
503
00:21:40,137 --> 00:21:42,655
But it was still a Christmas
celebration, the whole--
504
00:21:42,655 --> 00:21:44,379
Basically, the family
getting together.
505
00:21:44,379 --> 00:21:46,793
Well, I mean,
this is where I think
506
00:21:46,793 --> 00:21:48,310
we need to be really
tread carefully
507
00:21:48,310 --> 00:21:51,103
until we can have
a third party.
I mean, Kody, I--
508
00:21:51,103 --> 00:21:52,724
- I didn't know--
- I'm not gonna get
angry anymore, Janelle. I'm--
509
00:21:52,724 --> 00:21:55,172
I didn't know
what to do about my boys.
510
00:21:55,172 --> 00:21:57,137
That's really
what's the makeup--
511
00:21:57,137 --> 00:21:59,758
All we have to do is have
a conversation with them.
512
00:21:59,758 --> 00:22:03,172
And I-- I don't wanna do this,
this is really the point.
513
00:22:03,172 --> 00:22:04,586
I don't want it to be
in a place
514
00:22:04,586 --> 00:22:07,379
where we're just acting
like nothing has happened.
515
00:22:07,379 --> 00:22:10,275
I think in some ways,
that's what was happening
with Christine and I.
516
00:22:10,275 --> 00:22:13,137
When I would have
conversations with her
about our relationship,
517
00:22:13,137 --> 00:22:15,068
it-- it was too uncomfortable
for her.
518
00:22:15,068 --> 00:22:17,103
She didn't like having
those conversations, and yet,
519
00:22:18,172 --> 00:22:19,620
she left
520
00:22:19,620 --> 00:22:21,379
with me sort of
holding the bag
521
00:22:21,379 --> 00:22:23,517
never knowing that
she was going to leave.
522
00:22:23,517 --> 00:22:25,586
She was making plans
of leaving,
523
00:22:25,586 --> 00:22:27,517
having a discussion
with people about leaving,
524
00:22:27,517 --> 00:22:29,344
telling the kids,
the adult kids.
525
00:22:29,344 --> 00:22:32,344
You told me she had told you
she was planning on leaving.
526
00:22:32,344 --> 00:22:34,482
And then-- And then
when she leaves,
527
00:22:34,482 --> 00:22:37,068
I'm like, "She never told me."
528
00:22:37,068 --> 00:22:39,827
So when Kody talks
about Christine and him
529
00:22:39,827 --> 00:22:42,275
splitting up,
it always shocks me
530
00:22:42,275 --> 00:22:45,206
that he purports that
he never saw this coming.
531
00:22:45,206 --> 00:22:47,206
He's been telling me
for years
532
00:22:48,172 --> 00:22:50,068
that he wasn't attracted
to Christine,
533
00:22:50,068 --> 00:22:51,862
they were struggling
in their marriage.
534
00:22:51,862 --> 00:22:54,827
I would have left his ass
the first time
he said that to me.
535
00:22:54,827 --> 00:22:55,931
I would have.
536
00:22:55,931 --> 00:22:59,068
I'm not going to be angry
with you anymore, okay?
537
00:22:59,068 --> 00:23:02,862
I'm just... So you know,
if you wanna do a separation,
538
00:23:02,862 --> 00:23:05,689
I understand but I'm not
gonna be angry anymore.
539
00:23:05,689 --> 00:23:07,586
If I get angry,
I'm gonna leave.
540
00:23:07,586 --> 00:23:09,344
I'm not gonna be accusatory.
541
00:23:09,344 --> 00:23:11,655
I realize that
I'm morphing this grief.
542
00:23:12,931 --> 00:23:15,172
You know,
for the last month or so,
543
00:23:15,172 --> 00:23:18,137
I've oscillated between,
"I never ever wanna
see you again,"
544
00:23:18,137 --> 00:23:20,137
to, you know, I just...
545
00:23:21,137 --> 00:23:22,413
So I gotta figure it out.
546
00:23:22,413 --> 00:23:24,724
I do not know
how to reconcile with you
547
00:23:24,724 --> 00:23:27,482
unless my kids can
all be... Kody,
548
00:23:27,482 --> 00:23:29,275
- you didn't-- you haven't...
- I'm not, I'm not making any--
549
00:23:29,275 --> 00:23:32,310
...even talked to Savanah
in six weeks.
550
00:23:32,310 --> 00:23:34,793
Like, you didn't even call her
at Christmas or anything.
551
00:23:34,793 --> 00:23:35,620
Like, nothing.
552
00:23:35,620 --> 00:23:37,689
Well, sh-- Everybody...
553
00:23:37,689 --> 00:23:39,551
I...
554
00:23:39,551 --> 00:23:41,689
When Janelle and Christine
kicked me out of the house,
555
00:23:41,689 --> 00:23:43,758
and then when
Christine leaves,
556
00:23:43,758 --> 00:23:46,482
they separate me
from the environment
557
00:23:46,482 --> 00:23:48,344
that I know my children in.
558
00:23:48,344 --> 00:23:51,965
I'm just struggling to survive
all the heartbreak here
559
00:23:51,965 --> 00:23:54,758
while they sit here
and play Mean Girls together.
560
00:23:57,137 --> 00:23:58,862
So Janelle's not
in love with me.
561
00:23:58,862 --> 00:24:00,793
I think she thinks I'm hot.
562
00:24:00,793 --> 00:24:03,793
I got nice pecs
and a great six-pack abs,
563
00:24:03,793 --> 00:24:06,448
but that's all
she's interested in.
564
00:24:06,448 --> 00:24:09,448
I'm like, "Whoa,
buddy, you're way
missing the boat here."
565
00:24:09,448 --> 00:24:11,517
There's way more
to a marriage
566
00:24:11,517 --> 00:24:14,413
than just physical attraction.
And I feel like
567
00:24:15,034 --> 00:24:16,896
we're in big danger here.
568
00:24:18,724 --> 00:24:22,689
I've been doing a lot
of business.
And when I'm doing business,
569
00:24:22,689 --> 00:24:25,482
a lot of times,
it's happening in the evening.
So I haven't been
570
00:24:25,482 --> 00:24:28,206
around to-- to do stuff
with her after school.
571
00:24:31,241 --> 00:24:34,862
I don't know. So maybe
there's a lot to unwind here.
572
00:24:34,862 --> 00:24:38,793
Almost all my interaction
with Robyn's children
573
00:24:38,793 --> 00:24:42,275
are because I'm with Robyn
and interacting
with her children.
574
00:24:43,551 --> 00:24:46,172
So j-- I have to make
a plan with Savanah
575
00:24:46,172 --> 00:24:48,793
and interact with her
without Janelle.
576
00:24:48,793 --> 00:24:50,586
If I was at home with Janelle
577
00:24:50,586 --> 00:24:52,310
interacting with Janelle
and Savanah,
578
00:24:52,310 --> 00:24:55,620
this would be
every two nights.
579
00:24:55,620 --> 00:24:58,827
I'd be two nights at Robyn's
and two nights at Janelle's
580
00:24:58,827 --> 00:25:01,655
and two nights at Robyn
and two nights at Janelle.
581
00:25:01,655 --> 00:25:05,724
But Janelle's just made that,
um, clear that that's
not gonna be happening.
582
00:25:06,758 --> 00:25:08,724
Well, Covid's one
of those things that
583
00:25:08,724 --> 00:25:11,793
- would affect--
- No, it's not about Covid,
Kody. It's about
584
00:25:11,793 --> 00:25:14,689
only seeing
one person's perspective.
585
00:25:14,689 --> 00:25:16,068
I mean,
that's what I felt like.
586
00:25:16,068 --> 00:25:19,551
I mean, you-- you're like
my boys have to apologize
to Robyn.
587
00:25:19,551 --> 00:25:21,896
I know one of the issues
between Janelle and Kody
588
00:25:21,896 --> 00:25:24,689
is this idea that Kody
is asking for an apology
from the boys.
589
00:25:24,689 --> 00:25:27,310
I never asked for one,
I never wanted one,
590
00:25:27,310 --> 00:25:30,965
and I did not know that
he was asking for one for me.
591
00:25:30,965 --> 00:25:33,379
And I'm not actually happy
that he was doing that.
592
00:25:33,379 --> 00:25:34,344
Garrison
593
00:25:35,344 --> 00:25:36,206
called her up.
594
00:25:36,206 --> 00:25:37,965
- Okay, I know. Listen, I--
- No,
595
00:25:37,965 --> 00:25:39,724
there's a reason for that.
596
00:25:39,724 --> 00:25:40,931
- Yeah, but--
- Calls her up
597
00:25:40,931 --> 00:25:43,758
and accuses her of the one
doing all this Covid stuff.
598
00:25:45,206 --> 00:25:49,137
That's, like, really weird
to transmute that much stuff
599
00:25:49,137 --> 00:25:54,137
on to somebody that
was only being compliant
with what I was
600
00:25:54,137 --> 00:25:56,724
saying we needed
to do in order
to protect our family.
601
00:25:56,724 --> 00:25:58,413
Okay, I'm not even-- I'm not--
602
00:25:58,413 --> 00:25:59,655
It's not about Covid.
603
00:25:59,655 --> 00:26:01,862
Tit for tat Covid,
it's over, whatever.
604
00:26:01,862 --> 00:26:04,724
Like, it's really just
about feeling like
605
00:26:04,724 --> 00:26:07,689
you're a father to all
and a husband to all.
606
00:26:07,689 --> 00:26:09,586
Uh, but I'm not
respected by all?
607
00:26:09,586 --> 00:26:11,034
I mean, I don't know, Kody.
608
00:26:11,034 --> 00:26:13,586
I just-- I do not know
how we come back from this.
609
00:26:16,827 --> 00:26:19,241
I mean, do you really wanna
still have a plural family?
610
00:26:19,241 --> 00:26:21,000
Sometimes I can't tell.
611
00:26:34,413 --> 00:26:36,517
Holy Hannah.
612
00:26:36,517 --> 00:26:38,655
It's fun to have
dragon breath though,
you know, like really--
613
00:26:38,655 --> 00:26:40,000
I should've
brought, like, my...
614
00:26:41,103 --> 00:26:43,551
winter boots.
615
00:26:43,551 --> 00:26:45,793
Well, when you're here
more often, you'll have them.
616
00:26:45,793 --> 00:26:48,068
So this building, we call it
the Carriage House.
617
00:26:48,068 --> 00:26:51,206
And it is where
I'm going to be
618
00:26:51,206 --> 00:26:52,758
putting my clothing
business in.
619
00:26:52,758 --> 00:26:56,103
It's a huge project
and I'm slightly overwhelmed.
620
00:27:00,758 --> 00:27:03,344
Oh, I don't know
if this is gonna happen.
621
00:27:03,344 --> 00:27:05,172
I feel defeated.
622
00:27:05,172 --> 00:27:06,896
Okay, you know
how you love totes?
623
00:27:06,896 --> 00:27:10,655
Let's just put all this stuff
in different totes
and, like, mark them.
624
00:27:10,655 --> 00:27:12,482
Just the whole thing
in totes?
625
00:27:13,206 --> 00:27:14,517
They have big totes.
626
00:27:14,517 --> 00:27:17,379
So one of the things
that Mom and I have
always talked about
627
00:27:17,379 --> 00:27:19,793
doing here is, like, events.
628
00:27:19,793 --> 00:27:21,689
We've had a couple
of weddings here.
629
00:27:21,689 --> 00:27:24,413
So, like, when we have
those kinds of events,
630
00:27:24,413 --> 00:27:25,758
we need to have
lots of chairs.
631
00:27:25,758 --> 00:27:28,931
I want to use the space
for the clothing business
632
00:27:28,931 --> 00:27:30,827
so I don't know
what to do with it all.
633
00:27:30,827 --> 00:27:33,000
You want a storage unit
next to mine?
634
00:27:34,344 --> 00:27:37,000
- Like, for the event stuff?
- Oh, why don't we just... Oh.
635
00:27:37,000 --> 00:27:38,379
- Duh.
- Seriously.
636
00:27:38,379 --> 00:27:40,655
Good idea.
Let's just move it,
637
00:27:40,655 --> 00:27:43,172
then we can shut that
and lock that door
638
00:27:43,172 --> 00:27:45,724
and I don't have to look at it
or think about it.
639
00:27:46,448 --> 00:27:48,034
Garbage.
640
00:27:48,034 --> 00:27:51,206
I'm honestly in just this
really weird situation.
641
00:27:51,206 --> 00:27:55,000
I don't really have
much of a reason
642
00:27:55,000 --> 00:27:56,448
to be in Flagstaff
643
00:27:56,448 --> 00:27:59,724
except for the fact
that I'd really like
to heal my marriage.
644
00:27:59,724 --> 00:28:02,793
I mean, basically,
it's Robyn and her kids
645
00:28:02,793 --> 00:28:05,758
that I see and have
a relationship with.
646
00:28:05,758 --> 00:28:07,793
I enjoy being at the B&B.
647
00:28:08,482 --> 00:28:10,000
Two-car garage here.
648
00:28:12,034 --> 00:28:14,586
Commercial kitchen
attached behind it.
649
00:28:14,586 --> 00:28:17,586
There's some things that
I want to do here
as far as, like, food
650
00:28:17,586 --> 00:28:19,758
that I need to have
651
00:28:19,758 --> 00:28:21,310
the commercial kitchen for.
652
00:28:21,310 --> 00:28:24,172
I feel like
if I end up doing
653
00:28:24,172 --> 00:28:26,689
something more along
the lines of events,
654
00:28:26,689 --> 00:28:30,344
it's gonna be better
business-wise for me.
655
00:28:30,344 --> 00:28:33,206
If you're gonna have
weddings or anything
that has to be catered,
656
00:28:33,206 --> 00:28:36,034
whether it's our caterer
or someone they bring in,
657
00:28:36,034 --> 00:28:39,068
- it's a separate kitchen.
- It'll be so much
nicer to have.
658
00:28:39,068 --> 00:28:41,344
- I like that a lot.
- A bigger space there.
659
00:28:41,344 --> 00:28:44,586
Our families tried to do
different businesses
throughout the years.
660
00:28:44,586 --> 00:28:47,275
Kind of our downfall
with some of the businesses
661
00:28:47,275 --> 00:28:50,655
is the fact that there
wasn't a person in charge.
662
00:28:50,655 --> 00:28:53,896
Like when we were doing
My Sisterwife's Closet,
663
00:28:53,896 --> 00:28:55,482
Robyn should've
been in charge.
664
00:28:55,482 --> 00:28:58,344
I think in plural marriage,
it can get complicated.
665
00:28:58,344 --> 00:29:02,551
But I specifically wanted
to work with my sister wives
666
00:29:02,551 --> 00:29:06,241
on My Sisterwife's Closet
'cause I wanted that kind of
667
00:29:06,241 --> 00:29:08,827
group experience
that they experienced
668
00:29:08,827 --> 00:29:10,206
raising their kids together.
669
00:29:10,206 --> 00:29:14,034
And so I was
trying to sort of
pull them in for that.
670
00:29:14,034 --> 00:29:16,689
In polygamy,
most decisions, I think,
671
00:29:16,689 --> 00:29:18,655
are made by kind of committee.
672
00:29:18,655 --> 00:29:21,034
And that's good and bad,
that's both
673
00:29:21,034 --> 00:29:23,551
because committees have
a tendency to not get
a lot of stuff done.
674
00:29:23,551 --> 00:29:26,000
But I think it's necessary
and I think
it's super important
675
00:29:26,000 --> 00:29:27,965
in a plural marriage
to have a committee
676
00:29:27,965 --> 00:29:30,241
rather than one person
calling all the shots.
677
00:29:30,241 --> 00:29:32,793
Are you gonna
repave the driveway
and can we heat it?
678
00:29:32,793 --> 00:29:35,517
Because then
I don't have to shovel.
679
00:29:36,206 --> 00:29:37,241
Lazy butt.
680
00:29:48,172 --> 00:29:50,586
I mean, do you really wanna
still have a plural family?
681
00:29:50,586 --> 00:29:52,068
Sometimes I can't tell.
682
00:29:53,896 --> 00:29:56,413
You know,
I've carried this burden.
683
00:29:56,413 --> 00:30:00,172
Our entire marriage,
everybody else had
a tolerance for...
684
00:30:00,172 --> 00:30:02,482
for not being together.
685
00:30:02,482 --> 00:30:05,034
I felt like Atlas
and the world's on my shoulder
686
00:30:05,034 --> 00:30:07,827
and I just shrugged it off.
Nobody else picked it up.
687
00:30:07,827 --> 00:30:12,206
I've always worked hard
for plural marriage.
688
00:30:12,206 --> 00:30:15,172
And just because we got here
and I got
a little bit cynical,
689
00:30:15,172 --> 00:30:18,172
doesn't mean that I don't want
plural marriage anymore.
690
00:30:18,172 --> 00:30:20,344
But what has Janelle done
to help it?
691
00:30:20,344 --> 00:30:22,206
Janelle hasn't been living
plural marriage.
692
00:30:22,206 --> 00:30:25,517
She's been living
independence from a husband
693
00:30:25,517 --> 00:30:27,379
that's there
when she wants him
694
00:30:27,379 --> 00:30:29,689
and has resources
that she gets.
695
00:30:29,689 --> 00:30:33,862
It feels like it's easy
for you to be
at Robyn's house,
696
00:30:33,862 --> 00:30:36,344
and that you don't wanna be
anyone-- anywhere else.
697
00:30:36,344 --> 00:30:38,517
But I was always
at your house too.
698
00:30:38,517 --> 00:30:40,862
- I was always at your house.
- Yeah.
No, I'm just--
699
00:30:40,862 --> 00:30:43,172
- I guess I just--
- And I was
always at Chris-- Listen.
700
00:30:43,172 --> 00:30:44,379
- We don't have--
- Janelle.
701
00:30:44,379 --> 00:30:47,965
- Yeah.
- You're going off
of a recency by us with Covid.
702
00:30:47,965 --> 00:30:49,517
Well, then
you need to stop referencing
703
00:30:49,517 --> 00:30:51,206
what happened
during Covid too.
704
00:30:51,206 --> 00:30:54,172
I mean, I just see I'm--
I'm getting close
to the line now
705
00:30:54,172 --> 00:30:55,689
and he's starting
to get agitated
706
00:30:55,689 --> 00:30:57,655
'cause the way I see things
is very different
707
00:30:57,655 --> 00:30:59,275
than the way he sees things.
708
00:30:59,275 --> 00:31:01,551
This all came about
'cause I felt like
709
00:31:01,551 --> 00:31:04,931
I wasn't being supported
in what I was doing
710
00:31:04,931 --> 00:31:07,620
for the whole family.
Does that make more sense?
711
00:31:08,620 --> 00:31:10,241
But you know I think
we all had children
712
00:31:10,241 --> 00:31:12,068
at different stages
and it was-- You couldn't--
713
00:31:12,068 --> 00:31:13,620
You couldn't accommodate.
714
00:31:13,620 --> 00:31:16,275
Well, I-- I feel
the obligation
a little deeper
715
00:31:16,275 --> 00:31:18,275
to the littlest ones
because of the...
716
00:31:18,758 --> 00:31:19,896
of their needs.
717
00:31:19,896 --> 00:31:22,310
I felt like that's all you saw
were the little children
718
00:31:22,310 --> 00:31:24,034
and you stopped seeing
your other children.
719
00:31:24,034 --> 00:31:25,758
- Um...
- You became
so hyper focused
720
00:31:25,758 --> 00:31:27,379
on the needs of little kids,
721
00:31:27,379 --> 00:31:29,724
you stopped seeing
the other kids' needs.
722
00:31:29,724 --> 00:31:33,379
Kody has always
made it a point
723
00:31:33,379 --> 00:31:35,965
to be part
of his kids' lives,
724
00:31:35,965 --> 00:31:37,482
especially when
they're younger.
725
00:31:37,482 --> 00:31:40,655
I think it's easier for him
to forget that
726
00:31:40,655 --> 00:31:45,413
he should still nurture
relationships with his
adult children as well.
727
00:31:46,103 --> 00:31:48,344
Listen, I didn't overreact
728
00:31:48,344 --> 00:31:49,862
to what was going on
with Gabe and Garrison.
729
00:31:49,862 --> 00:31:51,310
But I think
730
00:31:52,137 --> 00:31:55,724
I went too extreme
on how I felt.
731
00:31:56,896 --> 00:31:59,137
And in the end,
it should've been
732
00:31:59,137 --> 00:32:01,344
just like, "We need
to have a conversation,"
733
00:32:01,344 --> 00:32:04,172
not that "You guys
owe me an apology."
734
00:32:04,172 --> 00:32:07,000
You know, and anybody
who is adult and making
their own choices
735
00:32:07,000 --> 00:32:09,793
had to make their choices.
They're free to do that
736
00:32:09,793 --> 00:32:11,689
but I had to be able
to protect the babies.
737
00:32:13,103 --> 00:32:16,206
I wish Solomon and Ariella
had the same value
738
00:32:16,206 --> 00:32:18,827
to the whole family that
they see other people.
739
00:32:18,827 --> 00:32:21,034
See, I think those kind
of statements are dangerous,
740
00:32:21,034 --> 00:32:23,137
Kody, because you assume
a lot there.
741
00:32:23,137 --> 00:32:26,103
"I wish that everybody valued
Sol and Ari the way that..."
742
00:32:26,103 --> 00:32:29,586
Like, so that I feel like
there's a lot of assumption
and judgement there.
743
00:32:29,586 --> 00:32:32,034
So that's the kind of place
where we need a counsellor.
744
00:32:32,034 --> 00:32:33,793
I mean, it doesn't matter
as much now
745
00:32:33,793 --> 00:32:36,000
but at the time, I felt
like I was being gaslit,
746
00:32:36,000 --> 00:32:37,931
manipulated and lied to.
747
00:32:37,931 --> 00:32:40,448
Well, I think she's pointing
her finger at, like,
748
00:32:40,448 --> 00:32:43,413
some kind of favoritism
towards Solomon and Ariella,
749
00:32:43,413 --> 00:32:46,862
which is the same
favoritism I always gave
to any of the little kids,
750
00:32:46,862 --> 00:32:50,206
starting from Logan
all the way through.
751
00:32:50,206 --> 00:32:52,586
When they're little,
I give them a lot.
752
00:32:52,586 --> 00:32:55,758
When they're adults,
I still give them a lot
753
00:32:55,758 --> 00:32:59,137
but I don't feel like
my obligation is the same
to them.
754
00:32:59,137 --> 00:33:00,310
You know, okay.
755
00:33:00,310 --> 00:33:02,827
We're just gonna go
the rounds again here.
I think--
756
00:33:02,827 --> 00:33:04,827
But you never
validated my position,
757
00:33:04,827 --> 00:33:06,310
- the position that I was...
- And you're
not listening...
758
00:33:06,310 --> 00:33:08,241
- ...to me either.
- ...forced into
like this experience.
759
00:33:08,241 --> 00:33:09,793
See, I-- Anyway.
760
00:33:09,793 --> 00:33:11,620
I am listening
to you, Janelle,
761
00:33:11,620 --> 00:33:14,379
because what you're
trying to do is you're
trying to lay it...
762
00:33:14,379 --> 00:33:16,586
- No, I'm just--
- ...on an idea that
763
00:33:16,586 --> 00:33:20,206
I didn't want to be around you
and that's not true at all.
764
00:33:20,206 --> 00:33:23,413
No, I just asked you
if you still want
to live plural marriage.
765
00:33:24,172 --> 00:33:25,448
'Cause I'm not sure.
766
00:33:27,689 --> 00:33:31,172
I'm not really inclined
to stay in this relationship
with Kody.
767
00:33:31,172 --> 00:33:33,896
I don't feel like I'm getting
what I deserve from him.
768
00:33:33,896 --> 00:33:35,724
Listen,
I'm pretty independent.
769
00:33:35,724 --> 00:33:38,103
I don't need a lot from him
770
00:33:38,103 --> 00:33:41,586
but when it comes down
to where he all of a sudden
771
00:33:41,586 --> 00:33:43,068
doesn't wanna be a father
to my kids
772
00:33:43,068 --> 00:33:45,413
because they
disagree with him,
773
00:33:46,724 --> 00:33:49,482
that sort of changes
the cost benefit equation
774
00:33:49,482 --> 00:33:52,000
for me in this marriage.
775
00:33:52,000 --> 00:33:54,517
I have always wanted
to be a father to my children.
776
00:33:54,517 --> 00:33:56,827
It was my sole goal in life.
777
00:33:56,827 --> 00:34:00,724
If you're only concerned
about how I am at your place,
778
00:34:00,724 --> 00:34:02,793
then you're a monogamist.
779
00:34:02,793 --> 00:34:08,034
So stop trying to act like
I did something wrong
for 20 years.
780
00:34:08,034 --> 00:34:10,931
You know what? It's true.
I've been in a place
where I don't feel like
781
00:34:10,931 --> 00:34:14,586
without being
in plural marriage,
we can be married.
782
00:34:14,586 --> 00:34:17,793
So it's like, "Okay, well,
then we gotta figure out
plural monogamy."
783
00:34:17,793 --> 00:34:19,931
'Cause we're not living
plural marriage.
784
00:34:19,931 --> 00:34:21,206
We don't wanna be
in one home.
785
00:34:21,206 --> 00:34:23,172
We don't have
the function to do that.
786
00:34:23,172 --> 00:34:26,034
Plural monogamy is where
you're not functioning
as one family,
787
00:34:26,034 --> 00:34:29,517
you're multiple families.
A husband with two families.
788
00:34:29,517 --> 00:34:32,931
So she's not interested
in reconciling with Meri,
789
00:34:32,931 --> 00:34:36,827
and I understand
'cause I'm not sure
Meri and I can reconcile.
790
00:34:36,827 --> 00:34:39,413
But she's not interested
in a relationship
with Robyn at all.
791
00:34:39,413 --> 00:34:41,310
So it'd be me
at Robyn's house,
792
00:34:41,310 --> 00:34:43,448
and then me
at Janelle's house.
793
00:34:43,448 --> 00:34:45,689
And these two families
don't interact,
794
00:34:45,689 --> 00:34:47,586
that's plural monogamy.
795
00:34:47,586 --> 00:34:49,827
Kody's the one who actually
brought up the word
796
00:34:49,827 --> 00:34:51,827
and the term
'plural monogamy'
797
00:34:51,827 --> 00:34:53,482
and he acts like
it was my idea.
798
00:34:58,586 --> 00:35:00,655
I mean, honestly,
for the last six weeks,
799
00:35:00,655 --> 00:35:03,482
I wasn't really sure
I was gonna even stay.
800
00:35:05,620 --> 00:35:07,103
Hmm.
801
00:35:07,103 --> 00:35:09,344
Here's what I will say.
I'm not leaving,
802
00:35:09,344 --> 00:35:11,034
I'm not throwing in the towel.
803
00:35:11,034 --> 00:35:13,896
I just need to be separate
while we figure this out.
804
00:35:13,896 --> 00:35:18,068
Can you explain to me
what's the value
of the separation?
805
00:35:18,068 --> 00:35:19,551
'Cause I feel like
806
00:35:19,551 --> 00:35:24,344
I'm more aware of what I need
when you're not there.
807
00:35:24,344 --> 00:35:26,758
You're there and I wanna
just, like, forget everything
808
00:35:26,758 --> 00:35:28,758
and just be, like, just--
809
00:35:28,758 --> 00:35:30,034
I'll lay back, I--
810
00:35:30,034 --> 00:35:32,103
I know,
but it's easier for me
to have focus
811
00:35:32,103 --> 00:35:35,275
on what I need
and and when I need
to communicate to you.
812
00:35:36,413 --> 00:35:37,344
I don't get it.
813
00:35:37,344 --> 00:35:39,896
The punishment seems
way beyond the crime.
814
00:35:39,896 --> 00:35:43,344
Maybe that's just
a wakeup call for me.
815
00:35:43,344 --> 00:35:45,827
Maybe she's not interested
in this at all.
816
00:35:46,655 --> 00:35:48,344
Maybe she's
817
00:35:48,344 --> 00:35:51,068
got what she needed
and she's moving on.
818
00:35:51,068 --> 00:35:53,103
We need a redefinition.
819
00:35:54,620 --> 00:35:58,206
I still am not 100% sure
we can save it.
820
00:35:58,206 --> 00:35:59,275
- Really?
- No.
821
00:35:59,275 --> 00:36:00,689
You don't think
it's just gonna be...
822
00:36:00,689 --> 00:36:01,896
- No,
because sometimes...
- Like--
823
00:36:01,896 --> 00:36:03,965
...I'm really angry still. Like...
824
00:36:03,965 --> 00:36:06,275
I don't know.
825
00:36:06,275 --> 00:36:10,551
I-- I don't really have
any kind of estate
or anything, Kody.
826
00:36:10,551 --> 00:36:11,862
I don't have
anything in my name.
827
00:36:11,862 --> 00:36:14,137
I have the properties
all mishmashed.
828
00:36:14,137 --> 00:36:16,517
Yeah, but you've got
all that property is...
829
00:36:16,517 --> 00:36:18,862
I know but I mean,
I just don't,
I don't really have...
830
00:36:18,862 --> 00:36:20,827
Uh, you know,
I mean, like, I...
831
00:36:20,827 --> 00:36:23,482
I don't know,
there's a lot to unpack.
832
00:36:23,482 --> 00:36:25,827
We have to pay off
the property, like,
he sits here--
833
00:36:25,827 --> 00:36:28,275
He moved heaven and earth
to get this house for Robyn.
834
00:36:28,275 --> 00:36:31,448
They-- they kept all their
crap in U-Hauls for months.
835
00:36:31,448 --> 00:36:34,896
They lived in it
as a short-term rental
before they even bought it.
836
00:36:34,896 --> 00:36:38,206
I'm sitting here, like, "Wow,
I am stuck. I am stagnant."
837
00:36:38,206 --> 00:36:40,448
Janelle has the same
assets as me.
838
00:36:40,448 --> 00:36:43,448
Robyn's house isn't an asset,
it's a bank's asset.
839
00:36:43,448 --> 00:36:47,620
We have to house
our children in that house
for another 15 years.
840
00:36:47,620 --> 00:36:50,620
I am not stopping us
from doing that, okay?
841
00:36:50,620 --> 00:36:52,103
- Okay, I'm just saying...
- That's-- I'm not--
842
00:36:52,103 --> 00:36:54,896
...I don't really, 'cause,
like, when you first left,
I thought, "Crap.
843
00:36:54,896 --> 00:36:57,034
I don't have anything.
I don't have anything
in my name."
844
00:36:57,862 --> 00:37:00,137
I don't have anything.
845
00:37:00,137 --> 00:37:02,793
This sounds like
it's about money for Janelle.
846
00:37:02,793 --> 00:37:06,206
It's like, "Have I always
just been a resource for you?"
847
00:37:06,206 --> 00:37:10,103
I am completely vulnerable.
If I decide to leave Kody,
I have nothing.
848
00:37:10,103 --> 00:37:15,724
If I can't provide everything,
I-- I'm not of value?
849
00:37:15,724 --> 00:37:17,137
Oh, hell.
850
00:37:17,137 --> 00:37:20,551
It's wild, it is wild,
the disconnect here.
851
00:37:32,551 --> 00:37:35,551
I feel like we did
a lot of work in Las Vegas.
852
00:37:35,551 --> 00:37:38,689
And for whatever reason,
the only progress we made
853
00:37:38,689 --> 00:37:43,931
was Christine's exit,
and that's not how
I view progress.
854
00:37:43,931 --> 00:37:46,896
In other words,
she just finally decided
what she wanted.
855
00:37:50,275 --> 00:37:51,068
Kinda...
856
00:37:51,068 --> 00:37:52,896
And here we are.
857
00:37:52,896 --> 00:37:55,310
Christine's getting closer
and closer to the edge.
858
00:37:55,310 --> 00:37:57,793
I'm hearing rumors,
I ask her about it
859
00:37:57,793 --> 00:37:59,275
She's like, "I'm not
threatening to leave you."
860
00:37:59,275 --> 00:38:00,689
I don't know
if that's because--
861
00:38:00,689 --> 00:38:05,172
Yeah, I don't-- I don't know
how to be involved
in that particular
862
00:38:05,172 --> 00:38:07,137
relationship, do you know
what I mean? I understand--
863
00:38:07,137 --> 00:38:09,137
Well, am I supposed
to bottle it up
and not talk about it?
864
00:38:09,137 --> 00:38:11,206
No,
I'm just saying, like,
865
00:38:11,206 --> 00:38:13,586
- yes, I mean,
I want you to talk about--
- She's gonna go.
866
00:38:13,586 --> 00:38:15,000
She's gonna find somebody
she's dating
867
00:38:15,000 --> 00:38:17,862
and she's gonna vomit
all over about her divorce.
868
00:38:17,862 --> 00:38:21,275
- About her marriage.
- Okay, and I'm not
trying to shut you down.
869
00:38:21,275 --> 00:38:23,965
- I don't know how...
- To talk about it
might be just
870
00:38:24,655 --> 00:38:26,793
counter-productive, I guess.
871
00:38:26,793 --> 00:38:29,689
I just don't wanna start
this conversation up yet again
872
00:38:29,689 --> 00:38:31,827
for the umpteenth time
in our conversation.
873
00:38:31,827 --> 00:38:34,103
Be a big boy and reconcile.
874
00:38:34,103 --> 00:38:36,620
You've been bitching
about that
for six months now.
875
00:38:36,620 --> 00:38:39,689
Get over it and reconcile it
and move on.
876
00:38:39,689 --> 00:38:42,448
Janelle, come on. I mean,
you weren't having
877
00:38:42,448 --> 00:38:44,965
a great experience
in Las Vegas?
878
00:38:44,965 --> 00:38:47,620
- No, I mean, Kody, I still--
- I mean, I need
to know because...
879
00:38:47,620 --> 00:38:50,068
- No, I--
- And that's so much
unwound for me
880
00:38:50,068 --> 00:38:52,517
how much, I thought
we were like--
881
00:38:52,517 --> 00:38:54,413
I'm sitting there,
this smiling idiot,
882
00:38:54,413 --> 00:38:56,448
and it turns out later
that it's like,
883
00:38:56,448 --> 00:38:58,241
"No, that was
a [bleep] experience."
884
00:38:58,241 --> 00:38:59,758
- I'm like, "All right,
then tell me."
- Oh, no.
885
00:38:59,758 --> 00:39:02,413
No, I thought we had some
good years in Vegas, for sure.
886
00:39:02,413 --> 00:39:04,931
- I was sprouting poetry!
- I know.
887
00:39:04,931 --> 00:39:07,655
- So that's, Kody--
- I was following you around.
888
00:39:07,655 --> 00:39:10,620
- I was like, we were--
- I know, I know.
889
00:39:10,620 --> 00:39:14,000
Well, he's like, "We had this
really great time in Vegas
for a couple of years."
890
00:39:14,000 --> 00:39:16,413
Yeah, but that
doesn't mean, it's...
891
00:39:16,413 --> 00:39:19,379
That it somehow
excuses this right now.
892
00:39:20,241 --> 00:39:21,655
Janelle denies this
893
00:39:21,655 --> 00:39:25,344
but I had a renaissance
with Janelle in Las Vegas.
894
00:39:25,344 --> 00:39:27,448
I mean, I miss you, honey.
I miss you.
895
00:39:27,448 --> 00:39:30,000
And I just don't know
how to fix this
or figure this out
896
00:39:30,000 --> 00:39:32,206
but I don't wanna just...
897
00:39:32,206 --> 00:39:34,724
'Cause you and I have
a tendency to be like,
you come back
898
00:39:34,724 --> 00:39:37,793
and we sort of just
forget all the hard stuff
and we just...
899
00:39:37,793 --> 00:39:40,344
- We sweep it under the carpet.
- ...it's in our
little place. I...
900
00:39:40,344 --> 00:39:42,586
I need something different,
you know, this time.
901
00:39:42,586 --> 00:39:43,655
Well, I agree.
902
00:39:43,655 --> 00:39:45,620
We need to be conscious
about our relationship
903
00:39:45,620 --> 00:39:47,379
and how we're working it out
and what we're doing.
904
00:39:47,379 --> 00:39:50,241
It was just easier
'cause you and I,
our conversation is amazing.
905
00:39:50,241 --> 00:39:52,000
I miss all our conversation.
906
00:39:52,000 --> 00:39:55,310
I don't know, maybe
we weren't taking enough
care of our relationship.
907
00:39:55,310 --> 00:39:57,448
Our actual
marriage relationship.
908
00:39:59,482 --> 00:40:01,448
I do miss Kody.
909
00:40:01,448 --> 00:40:03,896
We are very best friends,
we have a lot
of conversations.
910
00:40:03,896 --> 00:40:08,137
I miss him in my bed,
I miss him in my house,
I miss him.
911
00:40:08,137 --> 00:40:10,758
But I'm not being treated
the way I deserve
to be treated here.
912
00:40:12,931 --> 00:40:15,482
Well, this went much
better than I thought.
I was sort of--
913
00:40:15,482 --> 00:40:17,896
- What'd you think
that was gonna happen?
- I don't know.
914
00:40:17,896 --> 00:40:19,793
- I don't know.
- You didn't think
that I missed you?
915
00:40:19,793 --> 00:40:21,862
Well, no, 'cause...
916
00:40:21,862 --> 00:40:24,172
You didn't think I want
to kiss you on the lips
and see you again?
917
00:40:25,862 --> 00:40:28,482
Here's the thing,
you and I can be simple.
918
00:40:28,482 --> 00:40:30,000
It's everything else
919
00:40:30,551 --> 00:40:32,586
that is complicated.
920
00:40:32,586 --> 00:40:35,275
It's like, yes,
on a basic level,
we are simple.
921
00:40:35,275 --> 00:40:37,137
If there was nothing going on
but he and I,
922
00:40:37,137 --> 00:40:39,448
and we're on some
sort of desert island,
923
00:40:39,448 --> 00:40:41,068
we would be great.
924
00:40:41,068 --> 00:40:42,620
Let me tell you,
we would be great.
925
00:40:43,344 --> 00:40:45,931
But no, life is not that.
926
00:40:45,931 --> 00:40:50,241
I mean, this whole thing
with Christine is, that's
very, very complicated.
927
00:40:50,241 --> 00:40:53,413
You and I are married.
You and I are gonna
work this out.
928
00:40:53,413 --> 00:40:56,275
That's not going to matter,
there'll be a safe place here.
929
00:40:56,275 --> 00:40:58,620
It is the weirdest thing
in the world,
you have to understand.
930
00:40:58,620 --> 00:41:01,517
To be getting divorced
from one wife
931
00:41:01,517 --> 00:41:03,758
while you're having
a relationship
932
00:41:03,758 --> 00:41:06,379
- with another wife.
- I can imagine
it's a conflict, yeah.
933
00:41:06,379 --> 00:41:07,517
- For sure.
- It's weird.
934
00:41:08,655 --> 00:41:10,931
Well, it went better
than Janelle expected.
935
00:41:10,931 --> 00:41:14,034
I kinda thought that
we would reconcile right here.
936
00:41:14,034 --> 00:41:16,551
And she's like, "No, I'm...
I'm enjoying my independence,
937
00:41:16,551 --> 00:41:19,827
this freedom too much
so I wanna stay separated."
938
00:41:21,896 --> 00:41:24,103
More in my mind,
it went well
939
00:41:24,103 --> 00:41:29,000
because I'm deeply committed
to never triggering again
or becoming angry.
940
00:41:29,000 --> 00:41:31,931
If I see those
triggers coming,
then I'm gonna stop.
941
00:41:33,965 --> 00:41:36,103
I don't know.
I told him
we need a counsellor,
942
00:41:36,103 --> 00:41:37,655
we need a counsellor,
we need a counsellor.
943
00:41:38,862 --> 00:41:40,965
Here's the thing.
If he wanted it,
944
00:41:40,965 --> 00:41:43,827
I might, maybe, maybe
I would try to work on it.
945
00:41:43,827 --> 00:41:46,000
But if he doesn't want it,
I'm not gonna sit here
946
00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:49,103
and put all the effort
into trying to create this
947
00:41:49,103 --> 00:41:52,241
because I-- I think there's
something better for me.
948
00:41:53,620 --> 00:41:55,758
Next time
on Sister Wives...
949
00:41:56,344 --> 00:41:57,655
If Kody changed,
950
00:41:57,655 --> 00:42:00,827
would you ever wanna form
marriage with him again?
951
00:42:00,827 --> 00:42:03,172
Yes, but I think
it's unrealistic.
952
00:42:05,310 --> 00:42:08,275
Janelle keeps
telling me she doesn't
enjoy our time together.
953
00:42:08,275 --> 00:42:11,241
But I don't wanna break up.
954
00:42:11,241 --> 00:42:13,620
I think he just
likes to string people along.
955
00:42:13,620 --> 00:42:15,000
He's exhausting.
956
00:42:16,551 --> 00:42:19,241
Meri, he talks about us
all owning the property still.
957
00:42:19,241 --> 00:42:22,965
There's no question, Robyn.
He's done with me.
958
00:42:22,965 --> 00:42:25,068
Please, figure it out
with us here.
959
00:42:28,172 --> 00:42:30,413
I'm growing and I need
something different.
960
00:42:31,689 --> 00:42:33,206
What do you mean
"something different"?
961
00:42:33,206 --> 00:42:35,655
Like, I don't wanna be
married anymore.