1 00:00:01,241 --> 00:00:02,793 Previously on Sister Wives... 2 00:00:02,793 --> 00:00:05,551 Do you understand that you lie? 3 00:00:05,551 --> 00:00:07,379 That's the reason I call you "the Teflon queen". 4 00:00:07,379 --> 00:00:09,620 - I don't lie. - 'Cause you're lying about what has happened... 5 00:00:09,620 --> 00:00:10,862 - It's wild-- - ...and what's been going on. 6 00:00:10,862 --> 00:00:12,137 It's wild to me that you think I lie, 7 00:00:12,137 --> 00:00:14,827 because I think you're manipulating. 8 00:00:14,827 --> 00:00:18,862 I got into this conversation wanting to keep it logical, 9 00:00:18,862 --> 00:00:21,137 and I figured we would take this step by step. 10 00:00:21,137 --> 00:00:24,793 Really, truly, I don't think he-- he-he's looking for an excuse. 11 00:00:24,793 --> 00:00:27,137 Tell the world how I've lied, 12 00:00:27,137 --> 00:00:29,896 how I've manipulated, how I've done you wrong. 13 00:00:30,965 --> 00:00:32,448 I don't know what there is to talk about. 14 00:00:32,448 --> 00:00:35,068 Janelle not coming over on Christmas? 15 00:00:35,068 --> 00:00:36,827 - No. - I thought you were talking to her 16 00:00:36,827 --> 00:00:37,862 about this and stuff. 17 00:00:37,862 --> 00:00:40,275 Oh no, we didn't talk. We yelled at each other. 18 00:00:40,275 --> 00:00:42,827 So, in my mind, he is out of the house. 19 00:01:12,206 --> 00:01:14,413 I'm gonna have Aspyn and Mitch Mykelti and Tony over 20 00:01:14,413 --> 00:01:16,896 and we're going to paint on canvases 21 00:01:16,896 --> 00:01:18,758 pictures for Valentine's day. 22 00:01:18,758 --> 00:01:20,482 Okay, there are these big brushes, 23 00:01:20,482 --> 00:01:23,103 I don't how big of a brush you need. 24 00:01:23,103 --> 00:01:25,034 - And there's this. - Here's another big one. 25 00:01:25,034 --> 00:01:27,000 There's that, and then... 26 00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:28,724 Tony, if you wanna do a base coat, 27 00:01:28,724 --> 00:01:31,655 you can. 28 00:01:31,655 --> 00:01:34,689 Listen, I-I love going to, like, paint and wine nights. 29 00:01:34,689 --> 00:01:37,344 It's just super fun, it's just a blast. 30 00:01:37,344 --> 00:01:38,758 Um, I don't know what are we painting. 31 00:01:38,758 --> 00:01:40,241 Mom, what are we painting? 32 00:01:40,241 --> 00:01:42,241 It's a Valentine's day theme. 33 00:01:42,241 --> 00:01:45,000 It's just a tree with hearts on it. 34 00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:46,896 Tony and Mykelti are doing fantastic. 35 00:01:46,896 --> 00:01:48,724 So, they have Avalon now. 36 00:01:48,724 --> 00:01:51,034 It's fun to watch your kids become a couple. 37 00:01:51,034 --> 00:01:53,241 It's even more fun to watch your kids 38 00:01:53,241 --> 00:01:55,655 and their spouse become parents. 39 00:01:55,655 --> 00:01:58,344 Tony is an adorable dad with Avalon. 40 00:01:58,344 --> 00:01:59,344 It's adorable. 41 00:01:59,344 --> 00:02:01,965 She is the busiest kid. 42 00:02:01,965 --> 00:02:04,241 She's really the love of my life. 43 00:02:04,241 --> 00:02:06,448 'Kay, everyone needs to get their palettes 44 00:02:06,448 --> 00:02:10,103 and put on your palette white, black, all your colors. 45 00:02:10,103 --> 00:02:13,344 The colors are black, blue, orange 46 00:02:13,344 --> 00:02:15,379 - white and red. - What do we need the most of? 47 00:02:15,379 --> 00:02:17,620 I don't know, I've never done this before. 48 00:02:17,620 --> 00:02:19,689 Aspyn and Mitch have been married for a couple years. 49 00:02:20,862 --> 00:02:23,448 It's awesome to see how well they do 50 00:02:23,448 --> 00:02:26,344 and how well they communicate and work things out 51 00:02:26,344 --> 00:02:29,413 and they're just a great couple to be around. 52 00:02:29,413 --> 00:02:30,379 So, you guys excited? 53 00:02:35,896 --> 00:02:37,586 You can have Avalon for your Valentine. 54 00:02:37,586 --> 00:02:39,448 I am gonna have Avalon for my Valentine. 55 00:02:39,448 --> 00:02:41,275 So, you guys can go out on a date. 56 00:02:41,275 --> 00:02:44,103 Valentine's Day was something that was just always-- 57 00:02:44,103 --> 00:02:45,586 we didn't know what to do. 58 00:02:45,586 --> 00:02:47,482 It's not a really polygamous-friendly holiday, 59 00:02:47,482 --> 00:02:49,827 if you can imagine, it's like... 60 00:02:49,827 --> 00:02:52,827 Um, you know, I'm not planning much for Valentine's day this year. 61 00:02:52,827 --> 00:02:54,793 Kody and I definitely not in communication. 62 00:02:54,793 --> 00:02:57,482 Plus, if we were, I wouldn't really wanna do Valentine's day 63 00:02:57,482 --> 00:02:59,965 with him or with the family. 64 00:02:59,965 --> 00:03:02,862 Valentine's day is a turkey holiday 65 00:03:02,862 --> 00:03:04,517 for a plural family. 66 00:03:05,137 --> 00:03:06,896 This year, it's just... 67 00:03:07,344 --> 00:03:09,034 Holy crap, 68 00:03:09,034 --> 00:03:12,103 complicated and hard and horrible. 69 00:03:12,103 --> 00:03:15,586 I'm not doing a damn thing for Valentine's day. 70 00:03:15,586 --> 00:03:18,517 Listen, you have to have a Valentine 71 00:03:18,517 --> 00:03:21,034 to do Valentine's day. 72 00:03:21,034 --> 00:03:23,931 We-- I painted this, like, so, one that I did with Ysabel, 73 00:03:23,931 --> 00:03:26,172 I mean, they all end up in the garbage eventually. 74 00:03:26,172 --> 00:03:27,379 - I can make-- - Oh, that's sad. 75 00:03:27,379 --> 00:03:28,965 Dad and I did one together, 76 00:03:28,965 --> 00:03:30,413 which... 77 00:03:30,413 --> 00:03:31,586 Did you keep that one? 78 00:03:31,586 --> 00:03:32,827 Um, no, didn't keep that one. 79 00:03:32,827 --> 00:03:34,068 - Do you still have it? - Nope. 80 00:03:34,068 --> 00:03:36,482 - I did not-- - Is it framed upstairs somewhere? 81 00:03:36,482 --> 00:03:38,413 And you're waiting to... 82 00:03:38,413 --> 00:03:40,793 - be in love again? - Nope. 83 00:03:44,000 --> 00:03:45,586 If mom kept something from dad? 84 00:03:48,379 --> 00:03:49,689 Yeah. 85 00:03:49,689 --> 00:03:51,344 Yeah, Kody wasn't very-- 86 00:03:51,344 --> 00:03:53,448 There were some times where he would, like, 87 00:03:53,448 --> 00:03:55,862 bring over a Valentine's day gift. 88 00:03:55,862 --> 00:03:58,206 I got vases to happy-- 89 00:04:00,448 --> 00:04:02,931 - Hey, beautiful! - Give that to my mom. 90 00:04:02,931 --> 00:04:05,137 Sometimes, he would just give it too you there at night 91 00:04:05,137 --> 00:04:06,310 with everybody there. 92 00:04:06,310 --> 00:04:08,310 So, I should have more sympathy and empathy for Kody. 93 00:04:08,310 --> 00:04:10,137 But I didn't, not really. 94 00:04:10,137 --> 00:04:11,965 Now, he just has Robyn so he's probably fine. 95 00:04:11,965 --> 00:04:13,413 Oh, that was snarky. 96 00:04:14,103 --> 00:04:15,793 That was rude. 97 00:04:15,793 --> 00:04:17,793 Are you gonna move on and find a new husband? 98 00:04:17,793 --> 00:04:20,241 - Yes. - When? 99 00:04:20,241 --> 00:04:21,724 So, Truely-- this is not ready, 100 00:04:21,724 --> 00:04:23,379 and I'll probably talk to Truely about it and see. 101 00:04:23,379 --> 00:04:25,517 But I do have to tell you guys something. 102 00:04:25,517 --> 00:04:28,827 So, I've been talking to a matchmaker. 103 00:04:28,827 --> 00:04:30,344 Like, the professional kind? 104 00:04:30,344 --> 00:04:32,241 - The famous-- - Like the professional kind, yeah. 105 00:04:35,896 --> 00:04:36,931 I'm nervous. 106 00:04:38,448 --> 00:04:41,275 I'm super nervous about dating, um... 107 00:04:44,413 --> 00:04:46,310 Super nervous about dating. 108 00:04:46,310 --> 00:04:48,448 And I don't-- I'm not ready. 109 00:04:48,448 --> 00:04:50,172 I didn't have a great, intimate marriage. 110 00:04:50,172 --> 00:04:51,310 At all. 111 00:04:51,310 --> 00:04:53,724 And so, the idea of putting myself out there again, 112 00:04:53,724 --> 00:04:55,000 just, no. 113 00:04:55,000 --> 00:04:56,344 No, I'm not ready. 114 00:04:57,551 --> 00:04:58,620 For his body, 115 00:04:59,172 --> 00:05:00,827 I want bold tattoos 116 00:05:00,827 --> 00:05:03,448 and driving a motorcycle, that's the vision. 117 00:05:03,448 --> 00:05:06,034 Just saying, the tattoos will be fantastic. 118 00:05:06,034 --> 00:05:08,413 Just ca-- that's pretty much... 119 00:05:08,413 --> 00:05:10,586 Kody's opposite, not on purpose, but maybe. 120 00:05:10,586 --> 00:05:13,000 I'm just looking for something that Kody never was 121 00:05:13,000 --> 00:05:15,793 because I-- I just want someone who's a partner, 122 00:05:15,793 --> 00:05:18,275 a good communicator, someone who's funny, 123 00:05:18,275 --> 00:05:20,241 I'd love a sense of humor. 124 00:05:20,241 --> 00:05:22,758 Um, I told them about everything, like, 125 00:05:22,758 --> 00:05:25,517 whole big family and everything, and they said, "You know, 126 00:05:25,517 --> 00:05:27,448 for-- first, why don't we lead with 127 00:05:27,448 --> 00:05:29,689 that you have six kids but you have three grandkids. 128 00:05:29,689 --> 00:05:32,241 I told my matchmaker everything, 129 00:05:32,241 --> 00:05:35,206 from being public to being a polygamist, 130 00:05:35,206 --> 00:05:37,310 to leaving to my kids. 131 00:05:37,310 --> 00:05:39,000 They might as well know everything. 132 00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:41,344 They might as well, and then they can kinda pick and choose 133 00:05:41,344 --> 00:05:45,000 what do you think would be a good thing to start with. 134 00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:48,103 Well, let's just start that you're a female and you're 50, 135 00:05:48,103 --> 00:05:50,931 and you have some kids, and that's it. 136 00:05:50,931 --> 00:05:52,931 That's it, that's all they need to know. 137 00:05:52,931 --> 00:05:55,965 So, I am definitely going for a monogamous this time. 138 00:05:55,965 --> 00:05:58,517 - I'm done with the polygamy thing, just-- - Good. 139 00:05:58,517 --> 00:06:01,862 So, the issue is like, I feel like, with polygamy, once you try it once, 140 00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:03,310 - really, what's the point after that? - You'll try again? 141 00:06:06,068 --> 00:06:07,724 Not for me. Uh, it did, 142 00:06:07,724 --> 00:06:10,000 I'm not gonna say it didn't, 'cause I'm not gonna regret where I am, 143 00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:12,482 - you know? - That's good, 'cause you got me from polygamy. 144 00:06:12,482 --> 00:06:14,482 Right, all of you guys are because of polygamy. 145 00:06:14,482 --> 00:06:16,482 So I don't regret it at all. 146 00:06:16,482 --> 00:06:18,310 It took me a long time to leave. 147 00:06:18,310 --> 00:06:20,689 It took me years to leave. 148 00:06:20,689 --> 00:06:24,034 So, leaving our church, I was going to do it classy, 149 00:06:24,034 --> 00:06:25,965 leaving my marriage, I was gonna do it classy 150 00:06:25,965 --> 00:06:27,620 and I was gonna do it without bitterness. 151 00:06:27,620 --> 00:06:29,241 That doesn't mean that sometimes I'm frustrated 152 00:06:29,241 --> 00:06:31,896 and sometimes I'm angry and sometimes I'm disappointed and I... 153 00:06:31,896 --> 00:06:33,862 don't like all of the control that happens. 154 00:06:33,862 --> 00:06:36,034 I'm still gonna be as classy as possible. 155 00:06:36,034 --> 00:06:37,172 We'll go on several dates. 156 00:06:37,172 --> 00:06:38,448 - Like, whoever, and if it doesn't work... - Yeah. 157 00:06:38,448 --> 00:06:39,758 ...I'll go on some dates again. 158 00:06:39,758 --> 00:06:41,793 But it's only gonna be with people who 159 00:06:41,793 --> 00:06:42,931 I can trust around. 160 00:06:43,517 --> 00:06:44,172 Yeah? 161 00:06:46,758 --> 00:06:48,586 Tony, did you try all the ice cream flavors? 162 00:06:48,586 --> 00:06:49,724 - Yeah. - He did, mom. 163 00:06:49,724 --> 00:06:51,931 Tony tried every single ice cream flavor out there. 164 00:06:52,551 --> 00:06:53,482 - Twice. - Yes. 165 00:06:53,482 --> 00:06:54,655 Before he settled on me. 166 00:06:55,379 --> 00:06:56,275 It's just... 167 00:06:57,241 --> 00:06:59,724 He is just a little [bleep]. 168 00:06:59,724 --> 00:07:02,586 - I don't know-- - Every single ice cream flavor out there 169 00:07:02,586 --> 00:07:05,310 has been sampled by my husband, mother. 170 00:07:05,310 --> 00:07:07,931 Okay, well I don't know if I need to sample all the ice cream flavors. 171 00:07:07,931 --> 00:07:11,517 Tony is not afraid to bring up things 172 00:07:11,517 --> 00:07:13,068 that are... 173 00:07:14,379 --> 00:07:16,275 uncomfortable? 174 00:07:16,275 --> 00:07:20,275 No, I will not be sampling all the ice cream flavors. No. 175 00:07:20,275 --> 00:07:23,275 So, I was married to someone who apparently wasn't physically attracted to me. 176 00:07:23,275 --> 00:07:24,896 And the biggest reason why I haven't dated 177 00:07:24,896 --> 00:07:27,034 - is because-- - I don't-- I don't get that. 178 00:07:27,034 --> 00:07:28,793 The-The biggest reason I haven't dated 179 00:07:28,793 --> 00:07:30,275 is because, it sounds stupid, 180 00:07:30,275 --> 00:07:32,413 it honestly is, it's been hard to get over that. 181 00:07:32,413 --> 00:07:35,034 - How did you-- - The thing is, you're gorgeous. 182 00:07:35,034 --> 00:07:38,758 The biggest reason I left Kody was... 183 00:07:38,758 --> 00:07:42,758 I didn't want to be in a marriage where my kids would know 184 00:07:42,758 --> 00:07:45,000 that I was married to someone who wasn't attracted to me. 185 00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:48,172 So, leaving was the choice. 186 00:07:48,172 --> 00:07:49,689 'Cause I wasn't gonna stay in a marriage like that 187 00:07:49,689 --> 00:07:52,275 and I wasn't gonna show my kids that that was acceptable, 188 00:07:52,275 --> 00:07:53,206 'cause it's not. 189 00:07:54,827 --> 00:07:56,689 It's real hard to get beyond that in my head. 190 00:07:56,689 --> 00:07:58,034 - Right. - Yup. 191 00:07:58,034 --> 00:07:59,620 And so I'm scared. 192 00:07:59,620 --> 00:08:02,000 And so, I know we talked about going to a bar, 193 00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:03,379 and we talked about all that stuff, 194 00:08:03,379 --> 00:08:05,724 I'm not-- I'm not ready, I'm scared. 195 00:08:05,724 --> 00:08:07,586 - It'll take-- - He's the only guy I've ever kissed. 196 00:08:07,586 --> 00:08:09,655 Oh my God, what if I suck at kissing? 197 00:08:09,655 --> 00:08:11,862 What if I suck at everything like that? 198 00:08:11,862 --> 00:08:14,620 I don't know. I know that someone didn't like it. 199 00:08:16,206 --> 00:08:17,655 Do you see why it's scary? 200 00:08:17,655 --> 00:08:19,896 Do you see why it is terrifying? 201 00:08:19,896 --> 00:08:21,620 It is terrifying. 202 00:08:21,620 --> 00:08:23,551 So, I understand you're, like, 203 00:08:23,551 --> 00:08:26,000 you're scared and stuff because... 204 00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:29,965 I mean, you were married for 25-ish years, 205 00:08:29,965 --> 00:08:32,413 and the guy you were married with was never into it 206 00:08:32,413 --> 00:08:33,482 and that sucks. 207 00:08:33,482 --> 00:08:35,931 But, that's his problem, not yours. 208 00:08:35,931 --> 00:08:39,103 It's equal, scary and exciting all the time, both. 209 00:08:39,103 --> 00:08:40,655 'Cause yes, I want to date, 210 00:08:40,655 --> 00:08:43,000 but oh my God, no that sounds really, really, really terrifying, 211 00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:46,620 scary and-- vulnerable, and-and no 212 00:08:46,620 --> 00:08:48,482 and but still, at the same time yes, 213 00:08:48,482 --> 00:08:50,344 gosh yes, see? It's a lot. 214 00:08:50,344 --> 00:08:51,896 There's a lot going on. 215 00:08:51,896 --> 00:08:53,620 Okay, I am gonna say... 216 00:08:53,620 --> 00:08:55,724 - No, it's true. - Thank you for your guys' support. 217 00:08:55,724 --> 00:08:57,000 - Absolutely... - Mmm. 218 00:08:57,517 --> 00:08:58,620 I really like my kids. 219 00:08:59,241 --> 00:09:01,758 I really like them a lot. 220 00:09:01,758 --> 00:09:03,413 They're extremely supportive 221 00:09:03,413 --> 00:09:06,068 and good and kind and... 222 00:09:07,275 --> 00:09:08,620 wanting the best for me. 223 00:09:08,620 --> 00:09:10,965 Okay, oh, God, can I just get behind you guys. Yup. 224 00:09:13,379 --> 00:09:16,206 I'm not definitely getting full scoops of ice cream, 225 00:09:16,206 --> 00:09:19,103 I might go and do, like, the, "Can I have a spoon of that flavor", 226 00:09:19,103 --> 00:09:21,241 but just a spoon, you know, maybe. 227 00:09:21,241 --> 00:09:23,344 But never a full scoop of any flavor. 228 00:09:23,344 --> 00:09:24,724 That's way too much. 229 00:09:24,724 --> 00:09:26,068 Way too much of anything. 230 00:09:26,068 --> 00:09:27,275 I don't know! 231 00:09:27,275 --> 00:09:30,000 Too much, bit too much. I don't know. 232 00:09:34,379 --> 00:09:36,103 So, I haven't said anything to Robyn yet 233 00:09:36,103 --> 00:09:37,965 about what my plans are. 234 00:09:37,965 --> 00:09:40,000 So, I'm planning on moving my clothing business. 235 00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:42,655 I need to let Robyn know 236 00:09:42,655 --> 00:09:44,862 'cause I feel like she's the only one who's really gonna care. 237 00:09:44,862 --> 00:09:46,827 This is done? Like, you've made your decision? 238 00:09:46,827 --> 00:09:50,551 It causes me a lot of anxiety, but yes. 239 00:09:50,551 --> 00:09:53,206 I have an appointment to meet with Kody. 240 00:09:53,206 --> 00:09:55,620 I have not seen him in about six weeks. 241 00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:07,344 So, I'm gonna go over and talk to Kody 242 00:10:07,344 --> 00:10:09,137 so, this is the first time... 243 00:10:11,068 --> 00:10:15,793 that we're gonna really talk since out big fight before Christmas. 244 00:10:15,793 --> 00:10:18,206 - You act like this is not your fault. - Do you want 245 00:10:18,206 --> 00:10:19,896 - this relationship between you and I to work? - I don't know, do you? 246 00:10:19,896 --> 00:10:22,655 Because when you say "choose your loyalties, 247 00:10:22,655 --> 00:10:24,103 choose between me and your children." 248 00:10:24,103 --> 00:10:26,655 Now you are literally gaslighting. 249 00:10:26,655 --> 00:10:28,413 - I am not. - I was only asking 250 00:10:28,413 --> 00:10:31,413 - everybody to obey the rules of our home. - I-- 251 00:10:31,413 --> 00:10:33,965 I was always just really quick to want the conflict behind me 252 00:10:33,965 --> 00:10:38,551 so I would just be like, "Okay", and we would never resolve anything. 253 00:10:38,551 --> 00:10:40,758 We would just, sort of, pick up where we left off 254 00:10:40,758 --> 00:10:42,724 and smooth over and whatever, 255 00:10:42,724 --> 00:10:44,620 and I have realized, this time, 256 00:10:44,620 --> 00:10:48,655 it's just not working for me anymore, I really... 257 00:10:48,655 --> 00:10:50,965 wanna be treated differently, um... 258 00:10:50,965 --> 00:10:53,586 I want some more things out of a relationship. 259 00:10:54,965 --> 00:10:56,206 Can we do that with ours? 260 00:10:56,206 --> 00:10:59,206 It would be stupid to throw away 30 years or whatever, but, 261 00:10:59,655 --> 00:11:00,724 I don't know. 262 00:11:00,724 --> 00:11:03,241 I really just don't know if we really can fix that. 263 00:11:13,034 --> 00:11:14,724 - Hello! - Mornin'. 264 00:11:14,724 --> 00:11:15,896 How are you? 265 00:11:15,896 --> 00:11:18,137 - Fabulous. - Good. 266 00:11:18,137 --> 00:11:20,758 So, my best friend Jenn runs the B&B for me. 267 00:11:20,758 --> 00:11:23,655 So, today we're gonna be talking a little bit about 268 00:11:23,655 --> 00:11:26,206 some of the plans that... 269 00:11:26,206 --> 00:11:27,896 we've kind of been discussing. 270 00:11:27,896 --> 00:11:30,275 I have to show you something that somebody brought. 271 00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:33,517 - Or left. - For me? No. 272 00:11:33,517 --> 00:11:38,724 I mean, her number one job title is BFF, bestie extraordinaire. 273 00:11:38,724 --> 00:11:40,172 We're gonna have to 274 00:11:40,172 --> 00:11:41,965 have something a little bit official 275 00:11:41,965 --> 00:11:44,172 because that might look weird on a business card. 276 00:11:45,655 --> 00:11:47,103 Check this out. 277 00:11:47,103 --> 00:11:49,344 One of our guests left that. 278 00:11:49,344 --> 00:11:51,724 - Aw. - Isn't that sweet? 279 00:11:52,344 --> 00:11:54,275 I do love that. 280 00:11:56,827 --> 00:12:00,310 One of the guests left this pillow 281 00:12:00,310 --> 00:12:04,068 with a picture of me and my mom on it. 282 00:12:04,068 --> 00:12:07,482 It was very sweet, you know, lot of people knew my mom. 283 00:12:08,586 --> 00:12:11,034 Like, she was the kind of person 284 00:12:11,034 --> 00:12:13,000 that, if you're around her, 285 00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:14,448 you were all that mattered. 286 00:12:15,724 --> 00:12:17,862 - Sweet. - Oh my God, it's been almost a year. 287 00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:19,034 Almost a year. 288 00:12:20,965 --> 00:12:24,103 Nope, not gonna cry, but I love it, I love it. 289 00:12:24,103 --> 00:12:28,206 My mom loved living here at the B&B. 290 00:12:28,206 --> 00:12:30,655 She was like, so at home. 291 00:12:30,655 --> 00:12:32,655 She absolutely loved it. 292 00:12:34,551 --> 00:12:38,241 So, I haven't said anything to Robyn yet about what my plans are. 293 00:12:38,241 --> 00:12:40,034 I wanted to a couple weeks ago, 294 00:12:40,034 --> 00:12:42,965 like, really, there's no time that's gonna be good. 295 00:12:42,965 --> 00:12:45,275 So, I'm planning on moving my clothing business 296 00:12:45,275 --> 00:12:48,068 from Flagstaff up here to the B&B. 297 00:12:48,068 --> 00:12:50,931 Um, I need to let Robyn know 298 00:12:50,931 --> 00:12:53,517 'cause I feel like she's the only one who's really gonna care 299 00:12:53,517 --> 00:12:57,758 and is honestly gonna kinda have a problem with it. 300 00:12:57,758 --> 00:13:00,137 So, then, like, this is done? Like, you've made your decision? 301 00:13:00,137 --> 00:13:02,620 - You what you're going to do like, for real? - Yeah. 302 00:13:02,620 --> 00:13:05,448 It causes me a lot of anxiety, but yes. 303 00:13:05,448 --> 00:13:07,551 I'm going to 304 00:13:07,551 --> 00:13:09,103 move the clothing up here. 305 00:13:10,586 --> 00:13:13,034 So that I can be here more often, 306 00:13:13,034 --> 00:13:15,379 you can help me with that part of it. 307 00:13:15,379 --> 00:13:16,793 I will totally help you with that. 308 00:13:16,793 --> 00:13:20,172 - 'Cause I-- Yes, yes. - During school hours, you've got me. 309 00:13:20,172 --> 00:13:24,793 I've been best friends with Meri for about ten-ish years. 310 00:13:24,793 --> 00:13:28,551 We met because she hired me as a professional killer. 311 00:13:28,551 --> 00:13:31,586 And so, I was murder-for-hire for a few years 312 00:13:31,586 --> 00:13:33,310 and we just maintained our friendship through that. 313 00:13:36,517 --> 00:13:38,103 It's true. 314 00:13:38,103 --> 00:13:40,724 My relationship with Jenn is just a lot of fun. 315 00:13:40,724 --> 00:13:43,586 We know how to laugh and have a good time. 316 00:13:43,586 --> 00:13:46,758 In Las Vegas, I owned a pest control company 317 00:13:46,758 --> 00:13:50,137 and so she hired my pest control company 318 00:13:50,137 --> 00:13:53,241 and I provided pest control services 319 00:13:53,241 --> 00:13:57,551 for all the homes and just became friends with her through that. 320 00:13:57,551 --> 00:13:59,344 There's a lot going on, but at the same time, 321 00:13:59,344 --> 00:14:01,482 like, I think she's going to understand. 322 00:14:01,482 --> 00:14:03,586 You're-You're only gonna be here 323 00:14:03,586 --> 00:14:06,413 - like, part-time, you'll still be going back. - Yeah. 324 00:14:06,413 --> 00:14:09,517 So, I'd like my relationship with Kody to get to a place 325 00:14:09,517 --> 00:14:11,896 where we have, like, a good marriage relationship. 326 00:14:11,896 --> 00:14:13,310 But, that's not where it is right now, 327 00:14:13,310 --> 00:14:15,275 and I feel like when I tell him 328 00:14:15,275 --> 00:14:17,482 I'm gonna be moving my business up to the B&B, 329 00:14:17,482 --> 00:14:20,482 he's going to interpret that as, 330 00:14:20,482 --> 00:14:22,931 that I am done with this relationship. 331 00:14:22,931 --> 00:14:24,344 And that's not where I am. 332 00:14:24,344 --> 00:14:26,379 I'm-- purely selfishly, I love this, 333 00:14:26,379 --> 00:14:28,758 - because, like, now you're here. - Oh, trust me, 334 00:14:28,758 --> 00:14:31,103 - I love it too. - Like, we're back in the same town 335 00:14:31,103 --> 00:14:32,724 - for the first time since Vegas. - I know. 336 00:14:32,724 --> 00:14:34,586 - So, this is big for me. - I know. 337 00:14:34,586 --> 00:14:37,275 Jenn and I have been friends for, like, so long. 338 00:14:37,275 --> 00:14:38,551 She's really been there for me. 339 00:14:38,551 --> 00:14:42,586 She was around when I did the legal divorce 340 00:14:42,586 --> 00:14:44,586 so that Kody and Robyn could get married 341 00:14:44,586 --> 00:14:46,068 and he could adopt the kids. 342 00:14:46,068 --> 00:14:48,000 She was around... 343 00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:50,000 and helped me figure out a lot of stuff 344 00:14:50,000 --> 00:14:52,068 with the whole catfishing situation. 345 00:14:52,068 --> 00:14:54,482 Jenn very much knows her boundaries, 346 00:14:54,482 --> 00:14:58,137 and one of those is she's not gonna go out and talk about 347 00:14:58,137 --> 00:14:59,896 me or my family. 348 00:14:59,896 --> 00:15:01,551 Have you done anything in the carriage house? 349 00:15:01,551 --> 00:15:04,586 I haven't been out there since it started to snow. 350 00:15:04,586 --> 00:15:07,793 The carriage house has a lot of stuff in it. 351 00:15:07,793 --> 00:15:11,586 I need to figure out cleaning that out 352 00:15:11,586 --> 00:15:13,310 and what to do with all the stuff 353 00:15:13,310 --> 00:15:16,310 because that's where I plan on putting the clothing business 354 00:15:16,310 --> 00:15:17,965 once I move it up/ 355 00:15:17,965 --> 00:15:19,931 - Do you wanna go look at it? - Yeah, we should go look at it 356 00:15:19,931 --> 00:15:21,620 and figure out a plan. 357 00:15:21,620 --> 00:15:23,275 It's gonna be cold out there, are you ready? 358 00:15:24,793 --> 00:15:26,862 - I don't care about the cold. - I-- you have to visualize, 359 00:15:26,862 --> 00:15:29,103 - like, you have to see it. - I know I need to. 360 00:15:29,103 --> 00:15:30,517 - There's just so much-- - We'll just take garbage bags 361 00:15:30,517 --> 00:15:32,103 and we'll just start throwing crap in. 362 00:15:32,103 --> 00:15:33,655 - Oh, that'll be fun. - And then, it'll be fine. 363 00:15:33,655 --> 00:15:35,068 Even when it's cleaned out, 364 00:15:35,068 --> 00:15:37,103 it probably won't fit in here very well. 365 00:15:37,103 --> 00:15:38,827 I'm gonna have to do some... 366 00:15:39,517 --> 00:15:41,517 changing for sure. 367 00:15:41,517 --> 00:15:43,931 'Cause there's even stuff out there too, like, 368 00:15:43,931 --> 00:15:47,448 there's-there's a lot of stuff that's gonna have to be moved for that to... 369 00:15:47,448 --> 00:15:49,344 - be the space you want it to be. - Turn into the clothing-- 370 00:15:51,034 --> 00:15:52,931 - Okay, let's go look at that. - Okay. 371 00:15:52,931 --> 00:15:56,172 I'm not looking forward to going and looking at it because... 372 00:15:56,931 --> 00:15:59,206 I know what needs to be done, 373 00:15:59,206 --> 00:16:01,103 and it's very overwhelming 374 00:16:01,103 --> 00:16:04,344 and it just a big, like, a hot mess. 375 00:16:04,344 --> 00:16:08,068 Like, it is... such a mess, there's... 376 00:16:08,068 --> 00:16:10,482 so much that's gonna have to be done to this 377 00:16:10,482 --> 00:16:12,620 to make it workable for my business. 378 00:16:16,482 --> 00:16:17,344 - Hi. - Hi. 379 00:16:17,344 --> 00:16:18,586 - How's it going? - Good. 380 00:16:18,586 --> 00:16:19,862 Long time no see. 381 00:16:19,862 --> 00:16:22,724 - Yeah. - Are you gonna give me a hug? 382 00:16:22,724 --> 00:16:26,034 I have not really missed Kody, I'm not pining for him. 383 00:16:26,034 --> 00:16:28,034 Didn't go really good last time we talked. 384 00:16:28,482 --> 00:16:29,310 Nope. 385 00:16:30,068 --> 00:16:31,758 That's an understatement. 386 00:16:39,862 --> 00:16:42,206 I have an appointment to meet with Kody. 387 00:16:42,206 --> 00:16:45,206 I have not seen him since he blew up 388 00:16:45,206 --> 00:16:47,517 and walked out of my apartment right before Christmas. 389 00:16:52,344 --> 00:16:54,275 I have not really missed Kody, 390 00:16:54,275 --> 00:16:56,344 I mean, I missed him but I didn't really "miss" him. 391 00:16:56,344 --> 00:16:57,448 I'm not pining for him. 392 00:17:00,724 --> 00:17:02,379 About six weeks ago, before Christmas, 393 00:17:02,379 --> 00:17:04,482 Janelle and I had a major blow-up fight. 394 00:17:04,482 --> 00:17:06,275 We haven't seen each other since. 395 00:17:06,275 --> 00:17:08,517 - Thank you. - No problem. 396 00:17:08,517 --> 00:17:10,482 So, we're gonna meet for lunch 397 00:17:10,482 --> 00:17:12,586 and, sort of, talk it out, I guess. 398 00:17:12,586 --> 00:17:15,517 - At this table. - Thank you. 399 00:17:15,517 --> 00:17:16,517 - Hi. - Hi. 400 00:17:16,517 --> 00:17:17,724 - How's it going? - Good. 401 00:17:17,724 --> 00:17:19,000 Long time no see. 402 00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:21,241 - Yeah. - Are you gonna give me a hug? 403 00:17:23,689 --> 00:17:24,689 - How are ya? - Good. 404 00:17:28,310 --> 00:17:31,206 Ooh, cold water. 405 00:17:31,206 --> 00:17:32,793 - Where's the waiter? - It's okay, he'll be back in a minute. 406 00:17:32,793 --> 00:17:33,620 Yeah. 407 00:17:34,068 --> 00:17:34,758 So... 408 00:17:36,241 --> 00:17:37,827 - How are ya? - Good. 409 00:17:37,827 --> 00:17:39,655 Are you good? 410 00:17:39,655 --> 00:17:41,241 Yeah, I mean, everything's okay. 411 00:17:41,241 --> 00:17:43,068 - Okay. - So... 412 00:17:46,379 --> 00:17:47,344 I... 413 00:17:48,206 --> 00:17:49,620 - I mean-- Yeah. - Now... 414 00:17:51,172 --> 00:17:53,275 Didn't go really good last time we talked. 415 00:17:53,827 --> 00:17:54,758 Nope. 416 00:17:56,758 --> 00:17:58,206 That's an understatement. 417 00:17:59,448 --> 00:18:00,379 Well... 418 00:18:00,827 --> 00:18:02,137 I'm sorry. 419 00:18:02,137 --> 00:18:04,172 Well, we both did our fair share of screaming. 420 00:18:04,172 --> 00:18:06,586 - Like-- - Well I'm-I'm embarrassed by my behavior, 421 00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:08,724 but I'm also realizing that, uh... 422 00:18:09,344 --> 00:18:10,620 Um... 423 00:18:10,620 --> 00:18:12,827 You don't have a safe place to-- 424 00:18:12,827 --> 00:18:14,827 a safe way to talk to me. 425 00:18:14,827 --> 00:18:16,137 The-- It's a little bit of a blur, 426 00:18:16,137 --> 00:18:18,655 the last conversation, 'cause I was so shocked. 427 00:18:18,655 --> 00:18:20,965 So, he came in-- he was kinda angry when he came in, 428 00:18:20,965 --> 00:18:22,620 he sort of had that chip on his shoulder. 429 00:18:24,793 --> 00:18:25,517 Hey. 430 00:18:26,068 --> 00:18:27,586 It's winter out there. 431 00:18:27,586 --> 00:18:29,000 And all I was gonna do 432 00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:31,586 was just establish that we're doing Christmas separately. 433 00:18:32,586 --> 00:18:34,103 And the boys were asking 434 00:18:34,103 --> 00:18:35,758 if you thought that-- you've thought that you would come over, 435 00:18:35,758 --> 00:18:37,413 - and I said it wasn't optimistic. - No-- 436 00:18:37,413 --> 00:18:38,896 No, I'm not coming over. 437 00:18:38,896 --> 00:18:41,482 It's like, I have a house, I have a place where we would have Christmas. 438 00:18:42,241 --> 00:18:43,689 And he just lost it. 439 00:18:43,689 --> 00:18:46,310 - You act like this is not your fault. - Do you want this relationship 440 00:18:46,310 --> 00:18:47,793 - between you and I to work? - I don't know, do you? 441 00:18:47,793 --> 00:18:50,482 Because when you say "choose your loyalties, 442 00:18:50,482 --> 00:18:52,034 choose between me and your children." 443 00:18:52,034 --> 00:18:54,448 Now you are literally gaslighting. 444 00:18:54,448 --> 00:18:56,103 - I am not. - I was only asking 445 00:18:56,103 --> 00:18:59,068 - everybody to obey the rules of our home. - I-- 446 00:18:59,068 --> 00:19:00,413 I-I felt just... 447 00:19:00,413 --> 00:19:03,448 Like I had just endured two years of betrayal from Janelle. 448 00:19:03,448 --> 00:19:05,620 I triggered so badly. 449 00:19:05,620 --> 00:19:08,000 I was just so angry. 450 00:19:08,344 --> 00:19:09,586 No. 451 00:19:09,586 --> 00:19:11,068 - You stay and talk. - I'm done listening to you. 452 00:19:11,068 --> 00:19:13,482 - You stay and talk. - I-- No. 453 00:19:13,482 --> 00:19:14,793 I'm not going to, 454 00:19:14,793 --> 00:19:17,379 - 'cause you're not listening. - You're not listening to me. 455 00:19:17,379 --> 00:19:18,827 And I'm not going to. 456 00:19:18,827 --> 00:19:20,206 - Okay, so, we're done? - Goodbye. 457 00:19:20,206 --> 00:19:21,000 you! 458 00:19:24,965 --> 00:19:27,206 It was ugly. 459 00:19:27,896 --> 00:19:29,000 And it was sad. 460 00:19:30,827 --> 00:19:33,793 I mean, this divorce is affecting me 461 00:19:33,793 --> 00:19:36,000 in every way. 462 00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:37,862 It's affecting all my relationships. 463 00:19:38,517 --> 00:19:40,482 I realizing that I am... 464 00:19:41,068 --> 00:19:43,620 I am morphing, 465 00:19:43,620 --> 00:19:47,000 or transmuting grief into anger. 466 00:19:48,241 --> 00:19:50,827 And, um, I realize that I'm just-- 467 00:19:50,827 --> 00:19:53,827 I'm just not a safe place for you to have a conversation. 468 00:19:54,586 --> 00:19:56,103 So, um-- 469 00:19:56,103 --> 00:19:58,689 just, one trigger after another, just set me off. 470 00:20:00,172 --> 00:20:02,172 "Well, my relationship with you is crap 471 00:20:02,172 --> 00:20:04,517 because I'm so angry about this divorce." 472 00:20:04,517 --> 00:20:06,103 Well, be a man, 473 00:20:06,103 --> 00:20:10,241 separate your relationships like you have for our entire plural marriage, 474 00:20:10,241 --> 00:20:11,551 and pay attention here. 475 00:20:22,655 --> 00:20:23,620 Hmm. 476 00:20:26,379 --> 00:20:29,931 I-- I do think that I wanna stay separated for now. 477 00:20:32,344 --> 00:20:33,896 Really? You wanna stay separated? 478 00:20:33,896 --> 00:20:35,000 Yeah, I do. 479 00:20:40,413 --> 00:20:42,172 Uh, I'm-- I'm sort of surprised 480 00:20:42,172 --> 00:20:43,862 that she doesn't want to try and reconcile, 481 00:20:43,862 --> 00:20:46,827 that she wants to be separated. 482 00:20:46,827 --> 00:20:50,482 We've been separated probably two or three times in the past. 483 00:20:51,965 --> 00:20:55,827 I always felt like that was because she couldn't manage 484 00:20:55,827 --> 00:20:57,689 the relationship with her sister wives. 485 00:20:57,689 --> 00:21:00,413 I never felt like that was over me 486 00:21:00,413 --> 00:21:01,827 but maybe I was wrong. 487 00:21:03,689 --> 00:21:06,344 I'm really, really willing to do some counselling 488 00:21:06,344 --> 00:21:07,758 if we can find somebody. 489 00:21:07,758 --> 00:21:10,482 I think that's more fair, Christine just dropped this on me. 490 00:21:10,482 --> 00:21:13,931 I just know that I need to be separate right now, you know. 491 00:21:14,517 --> 00:21:15,758 Okay. 492 00:21:15,758 --> 00:21:17,551 I mean, I still have a lot of affection for you. 493 00:21:19,172 --> 00:21:21,758 Yeah, maybe some counselling is a good idea. 494 00:21:21,758 --> 00:21:22,896 I... 495 00:21:22,896 --> 00:21:25,482 Other than just that experience 496 00:21:25,482 --> 00:21:27,275 where I'm blowing up over 497 00:21:28,137 --> 00:21:30,793 really just, I guess, rejection, 498 00:21:30,793 --> 00:21:33,896 you guys are doing Christmas without me, it's, uh... 499 00:21:33,896 --> 00:21:35,275 - It's a-- - You know Christine and I 500 00:21:35,275 --> 00:21:36,896 didn't do Christmas together, right? 501 00:21:36,896 --> 00:21:38,413 We did it separate 502 00:21:38,413 --> 00:21:40,137 and she came after. 503 00:21:40,137 --> 00:21:42,655 But it was still a Christmas celebration, the whole-- 504 00:21:42,655 --> 00:21:44,379 Basically, the family getting together. 505 00:21:44,379 --> 00:21:46,793 Well, I mean, this is where I think 506 00:21:46,793 --> 00:21:48,310 we need to be really tread carefully 507 00:21:48,310 --> 00:21:51,103 until we can have a third party. I mean, Kody, I-- 508 00:21:51,103 --> 00:21:52,724 - I didn't know-- - I'm not gonna get angry anymore, Janelle. I'm-- 509 00:21:52,724 --> 00:21:55,172 I didn't know what to do about my boys. 510 00:21:55,172 --> 00:21:57,137 That's really what's the makeup-- 511 00:21:57,137 --> 00:21:59,758 All we have to do is have a conversation with them. 512 00:21:59,758 --> 00:22:03,172 And I-- I don't wanna do this, this is really the point. 513 00:22:03,172 --> 00:22:04,586 I don't want it to be in a place 514 00:22:04,586 --> 00:22:07,379 where we're just acting like nothing has happened. 515 00:22:07,379 --> 00:22:10,275 I think in some ways, that's what was happening with Christine and I. 516 00:22:10,275 --> 00:22:13,137 When I would have conversations with her about our relationship, 517 00:22:13,137 --> 00:22:15,068 it-- it was too uncomfortable for her. 518 00:22:15,068 --> 00:22:17,103 She didn't like having those conversations, and yet, 519 00:22:18,172 --> 00:22:19,620 she left 520 00:22:19,620 --> 00:22:21,379 with me sort of holding the bag 521 00:22:21,379 --> 00:22:23,517 never knowing that she was going to leave. 522 00:22:23,517 --> 00:22:25,586 She was making plans of leaving, 523 00:22:25,586 --> 00:22:27,517 having a discussion with people about leaving, 524 00:22:27,517 --> 00:22:29,344 telling the kids, the adult kids. 525 00:22:29,344 --> 00:22:32,344 You told me she had told you she was planning on leaving. 526 00:22:32,344 --> 00:22:34,482 And then-- And then when she leaves, 527 00:22:34,482 --> 00:22:37,068 I'm like, "She never told me." 528 00:22:37,068 --> 00:22:39,827 So when Kody talks about Christine and him 529 00:22:39,827 --> 00:22:42,275 splitting up, it always shocks me 530 00:22:42,275 --> 00:22:45,206 that he purports that he never saw this coming. 531 00:22:45,206 --> 00:22:47,206 He's been telling me for years 532 00:22:48,172 --> 00:22:50,068 that he wasn't attracted to Christine, 533 00:22:50,068 --> 00:22:51,862 they were struggling in their marriage. 534 00:22:51,862 --> 00:22:54,827 I would have left his ass the first time he said that to me. 535 00:22:54,827 --> 00:22:55,931 I would have. 536 00:22:55,931 --> 00:22:59,068 I'm not going to be angry with you anymore, okay? 537 00:22:59,068 --> 00:23:02,862 I'm just... So you know, if you wanna do a separation, 538 00:23:02,862 --> 00:23:05,689 I understand but I'm not gonna be angry anymore. 539 00:23:05,689 --> 00:23:07,586 If I get angry, I'm gonna leave. 540 00:23:07,586 --> 00:23:09,344 I'm not gonna be accusatory. 541 00:23:09,344 --> 00:23:11,655 I realize that I'm morphing this grief. 542 00:23:12,931 --> 00:23:15,172 You know, for the last month or so, 543 00:23:15,172 --> 00:23:18,137 I've oscillated between, "I never ever wanna see you again," 544 00:23:18,137 --> 00:23:20,137 to, you know, I just... 545 00:23:21,137 --> 00:23:22,413 So I gotta figure it out. 546 00:23:22,413 --> 00:23:24,724 I do not know how to reconcile with you 547 00:23:24,724 --> 00:23:27,482 unless my kids can all be... Kody, 548 00:23:27,482 --> 00:23:29,275 - you didn't-- you haven't... - I'm not, I'm not making any-- 549 00:23:29,275 --> 00:23:32,310 ...even talked to Savanah in six weeks. 550 00:23:32,310 --> 00:23:34,793 Like, you didn't even call her at Christmas or anything. 551 00:23:34,793 --> 00:23:35,620 Like, nothing. 552 00:23:35,620 --> 00:23:37,689 Well, sh-- Everybody... 553 00:23:37,689 --> 00:23:39,551 I... 554 00:23:39,551 --> 00:23:41,689 When Janelle and Christine kicked me out of the house, 555 00:23:41,689 --> 00:23:43,758 and then when Christine leaves, 556 00:23:43,758 --> 00:23:46,482 they separate me from the environment 557 00:23:46,482 --> 00:23:48,344 that I know my children in. 558 00:23:48,344 --> 00:23:51,965 I'm just struggling to survive all the heartbreak here 559 00:23:51,965 --> 00:23:54,758 while they sit here and play Mean Girls together. 560 00:23:57,137 --> 00:23:58,862 So Janelle's not in love with me. 561 00:23:58,862 --> 00:24:00,793 I think she thinks I'm hot. 562 00:24:00,793 --> 00:24:03,793 I got nice pecs and a great six-pack abs, 563 00:24:03,793 --> 00:24:06,448 but that's all she's interested in. 564 00:24:06,448 --> 00:24:09,448 I'm like, "Whoa, buddy, you're way missing the boat here." 565 00:24:09,448 --> 00:24:11,517 There's way more to a marriage 566 00:24:11,517 --> 00:24:14,413 than just physical attraction. And I feel like 567 00:24:15,034 --> 00:24:16,896 we're in big danger here. 568 00:24:18,724 --> 00:24:22,689 I've been doing a lot of business. And when I'm doing business, 569 00:24:22,689 --> 00:24:25,482 a lot of times, it's happening in the evening. So I haven't been 570 00:24:25,482 --> 00:24:28,206 around to-- to do stuff with her after school. 571 00:24:31,241 --> 00:24:34,862 I don't know. So maybe there's a lot to unwind here. 572 00:24:34,862 --> 00:24:38,793 Almost all my interaction with Robyn's children 573 00:24:38,793 --> 00:24:42,275 are because I'm with Robyn and interacting with her children. 574 00:24:43,551 --> 00:24:46,172 So j-- I have to make a plan with Savanah 575 00:24:46,172 --> 00:24:48,793 and interact with her without Janelle. 576 00:24:48,793 --> 00:24:50,586 If I was at home with Janelle 577 00:24:50,586 --> 00:24:52,310 interacting with Janelle and Savanah, 578 00:24:52,310 --> 00:24:55,620 this would be every two nights. 579 00:24:55,620 --> 00:24:58,827 I'd be two nights at Robyn's and two nights at Janelle's 580 00:24:58,827 --> 00:25:01,655 and two nights at Robyn and two nights at Janelle. 581 00:25:01,655 --> 00:25:05,724 But Janelle's just made that, um, clear that that's not gonna be happening. 582 00:25:06,758 --> 00:25:08,724 Well, Covid's one of those things that 583 00:25:08,724 --> 00:25:11,793 - would affect-- - No, it's not about Covid, Kody. It's about 584 00:25:11,793 --> 00:25:14,689 only seeing one person's perspective. 585 00:25:14,689 --> 00:25:16,068 I mean, that's what I felt like. 586 00:25:16,068 --> 00:25:19,551 I mean, you-- you're like my boys have to apologize to Robyn. 587 00:25:19,551 --> 00:25:21,896 I know one of the issues between Janelle and Kody 588 00:25:21,896 --> 00:25:24,689 is this idea that Kody is asking for an apology from the boys. 589 00:25:24,689 --> 00:25:27,310 I never asked for one, I never wanted one, 590 00:25:27,310 --> 00:25:30,965 and I did not know that he was asking for one for me. 591 00:25:30,965 --> 00:25:33,379 And I'm not actually happy that he was doing that. 592 00:25:33,379 --> 00:25:34,344 Garrison 593 00:25:35,344 --> 00:25:36,206 called her up. 594 00:25:36,206 --> 00:25:37,965 - Okay, I know. Listen, I-- - No, 595 00:25:37,965 --> 00:25:39,724 there's a reason for that. 596 00:25:39,724 --> 00:25:40,931 - Yeah, but-- - Calls her up 597 00:25:40,931 --> 00:25:43,758 and accuses her of the one doing all this Covid stuff. 598 00:25:45,206 --> 00:25:49,137 That's, like, really weird to transmute that much stuff 599 00:25:49,137 --> 00:25:54,137 on to somebody that was only being compliant with what I was 600 00:25:54,137 --> 00:25:56,724 saying we needed to do in order to protect our family. 601 00:25:56,724 --> 00:25:58,413 Okay, I'm not even-- I'm not-- 602 00:25:58,413 --> 00:25:59,655 It's not about Covid. 603 00:25:59,655 --> 00:26:01,862 Tit for tat Covid, it's over, whatever. 604 00:26:01,862 --> 00:26:04,724 Like, it's really just about feeling like 605 00:26:04,724 --> 00:26:07,689 you're a father to all and a husband to all. 606 00:26:07,689 --> 00:26:09,586 Uh, but I'm not respected by all? 607 00:26:09,586 --> 00:26:11,034 I mean, I don't know, Kody. 608 00:26:11,034 --> 00:26:13,586 I just-- I do not know how we come back from this. 609 00:26:16,827 --> 00:26:19,241 I mean, do you really wanna still have a plural family? 610 00:26:19,241 --> 00:26:21,000 Sometimes I can't tell. 611 00:26:34,413 --> 00:26:36,517 Holy Hannah. 612 00:26:36,517 --> 00:26:38,655 It's fun to have dragon breath though, you know, like really-- 613 00:26:38,655 --> 00:26:40,000 I should've brought, like, my... 614 00:26:41,103 --> 00:26:43,551 winter boots. 615 00:26:43,551 --> 00:26:45,793 Well, when you're here more often, you'll have them. 616 00:26:45,793 --> 00:26:48,068 So this building, we call it the Carriage House. 617 00:26:48,068 --> 00:26:51,206 And it is where I'm going to be 618 00:26:51,206 --> 00:26:52,758 putting my clothing business in. 619 00:26:52,758 --> 00:26:56,103 It's a huge project and I'm slightly overwhelmed. 620 00:27:00,758 --> 00:27:03,344 Oh, I don't know if this is gonna happen. 621 00:27:03,344 --> 00:27:05,172 I feel defeated. 622 00:27:05,172 --> 00:27:06,896 Okay, you know how you love totes? 623 00:27:06,896 --> 00:27:10,655 Let's just put all this stuff in different totes and, like, mark them. 624 00:27:10,655 --> 00:27:12,482 Just the whole thing in totes? 625 00:27:13,206 --> 00:27:14,517 They have big totes. 626 00:27:14,517 --> 00:27:17,379 So one of the things that Mom and I have always talked about 627 00:27:17,379 --> 00:27:19,793 doing here is, like, events. 628 00:27:19,793 --> 00:27:21,689 We've had a couple of weddings here. 629 00:27:21,689 --> 00:27:24,413 So, like, when we have those kinds of events, 630 00:27:24,413 --> 00:27:25,758 we need to have lots of chairs. 631 00:27:25,758 --> 00:27:28,931 I want to use the space for the clothing business 632 00:27:28,931 --> 00:27:30,827 so I don't know what to do with it all. 633 00:27:30,827 --> 00:27:33,000 You want a storage unit next to mine? 634 00:27:34,344 --> 00:27:37,000 - Like, for the event stuff? - Oh, why don't we just... Oh. 635 00:27:37,000 --> 00:27:38,379 - Duh. - Seriously. 636 00:27:38,379 --> 00:27:40,655 Good idea. Let's just move it, 637 00:27:40,655 --> 00:27:43,172 then we can shut that and lock that door 638 00:27:43,172 --> 00:27:45,724 and I don't have to look at it or think about it. 639 00:27:46,448 --> 00:27:48,034 Garbage. 640 00:27:48,034 --> 00:27:51,206 I'm honestly in just this really weird situation. 641 00:27:51,206 --> 00:27:55,000 I don't really have much of a reason 642 00:27:55,000 --> 00:27:56,448 to be in Flagstaff 643 00:27:56,448 --> 00:27:59,724 except for the fact that I'd really like to heal my marriage. 644 00:27:59,724 --> 00:28:02,793 I mean, basically, it's Robyn and her kids 645 00:28:02,793 --> 00:28:05,758 that I see and have a relationship with. 646 00:28:05,758 --> 00:28:07,793 I enjoy being at the B&B. 647 00:28:08,482 --> 00:28:10,000 Two-car garage here. 648 00:28:12,034 --> 00:28:14,586 Commercial kitchen attached behind it. 649 00:28:14,586 --> 00:28:17,586 There's some things that I want to do here as far as, like, food 650 00:28:17,586 --> 00:28:19,758 that I need to have 651 00:28:19,758 --> 00:28:21,310 the commercial kitchen for. 652 00:28:21,310 --> 00:28:24,172 I feel like if I end up doing 653 00:28:24,172 --> 00:28:26,689 something more along the lines of events, 654 00:28:26,689 --> 00:28:30,344 it's gonna be better business-wise for me. 655 00:28:30,344 --> 00:28:33,206 If you're gonna have weddings or anything that has to be catered, 656 00:28:33,206 --> 00:28:36,034 whether it's our caterer or someone they bring in, 657 00:28:36,034 --> 00:28:39,068 - it's a separate kitchen. - It'll be so much nicer to have. 658 00:28:39,068 --> 00:28:41,344 - I like that a lot. - A bigger space there. 659 00:28:41,344 --> 00:28:44,586 Our families tried to do different businesses throughout the years. 660 00:28:44,586 --> 00:28:47,275 Kind of our downfall with some of the businesses 661 00:28:47,275 --> 00:28:50,655 is the fact that there wasn't a person in charge. 662 00:28:50,655 --> 00:28:53,896 Like when we were doing My Sisterwife's Closet, 663 00:28:53,896 --> 00:28:55,482 Robyn should've been in charge. 664 00:28:55,482 --> 00:28:58,344 I think in plural marriage, it can get complicated. 665 00:28:58,344 --> 00:29:02,551 But I specifically wanted to work with my sister wives 666 00:29:02,551 --> 00:29:06,241 on My Sisterwife's Closet 'cause I wanted that kind of 667 00:29:06,241 --> 00:29:08,827 group experience that they experienced 668 00:29:08,827 --> 00:29:10,206 raising their kids together. 669 00:29:10,206 --> 00:29:14,034 And so I was trying to sort of pull them in for that. 670 00:29:14,034 --> 00:29:16,689 In polygamy, most decisions, I think, 671 00:29:16,689 --> 00:29:18,655 are made by kind of committee. 672 00:29:18,655 --> 00:29:21,034 And that's good and bad, that's both 673 00:29:21,034 --> 00:29:23,551 because committees have a tendency to not get a lot of stuff done. 674 00:29:23,551 --> 00:29:26,000 But I think it's necessary and I think it's super important 675 00:29:26,000 --> 00:29:27,965 in a plural marriage to have a committee 676 00:29:27,965 --> 00:29:30,241 rather than one person calling all the shots. 677 00:29:30,241 --> 00:29:32,793 Are you gonna repave the driveway and can we heat it? 678 00:29:32,793 --> 00:29:35,517 Because then I don't have to shovel. 679 00:29:36,206 --> 00:29:37,241 Lazy butt. 680 00:29:48,172 --> 00:29:50,586 I mean, do you really wanna still have a plural family? 681 00:29:50,586 --> 00:29:52,068 Sometimes I can't tell. 682 00:29:53,896 --> 00:29:56,413 You know, I've carried this burden. 683 00:29:56,413 --> 00:30:00,172 Our entire marriage, everybody else had a tolerance for... 684 00:30:00,172 --> 00:30:02,482 for not being together. 685 00:30:02,482 --> 00:30:05,034 I felt like Atlas and the world's on my shoulder 686 00:30:05,034 --> 00:30:07,827 and I just shrugged it off. Nobody else picked it up. 687 00:30:07,827 --> 00:30:12,206 I've always worked hard for plural marriage. 688 00:30:12,206 --> 00:30:15,172 And just because we got here and I got a little bit cynical, 689 00:30:15,172 --> 00:30:18,172 doesn't mean that I don't want plural marriage anymore. 690 00:30:18,172 --> 00:30:20,344 But what has Janelle done to help it? 691 00:30:20,344 --> 00:30:22,206 Janelle hasn't been living plural marriage. 692 00:30:22,206 --> 00:30:25,517 She's been living independence from a husband 693 00:30:25,517 --> 00:30:27,379 that's there when she wants him 694 00:30:27,379 --> 00:30:29,689 and has resources that she gets. 695 00:30:29,689 --> 00:30:33,862 It feels like it's easy for you to be at Robyn's house, 696 00:30:33,862 --> 00:30:36,344 and that you don't wanna be anyone-- anywhere else. 697 00:30:36,344 --> 00:30:38,517 But I was always at your house too. 698 00:30:38,517 --> 00:30:40,862 - I was always at your house. - Yeah. No, I'm just-- 699 00:30:40,862 --> 00:30:43,172 - I guess I just-- - And I was always at Chris-- Listen. 700 00:30:43,172 --> 00:30:44,379 - We don't have-- - Janelle. 701 00:30:44,379 --> 00:30:47,965 - Yeah. - You're going off of a recency by us with Covid. 702 00:30:47,965 --> 00:30:49,517 Well, then you need to stop referencing 703 00:30:49,517 --> 00:30:51,206 what happened during Covid too. 704 00:30:51,206 --> 00:30:54,172 I mean, I just see I'm-- I'm getting close to the line now 705 00:30:54,172 --> 00:30:55,689 and he's starting to get agitated 706 00:30:55,689 --> 00:30:57,655 'cause the way I see things is very different 707 00:30:57,655 --> 00:30:59,275 than the way he sees things. 708 00:30:59,275 --> 00:31:01,551 This all came about 'cause I felt like 709 00:31:01,551 --> 00:31:04,931 I wasn't being supported in what I was doing 710 00:31:04,931 --> 00:31:07,620 for the whole family. Does that make more sense? 711 00:31:08,620 --> 00:31:10,241 But you know I think we all had children 712 00:31:10,241 --> 00:31:12,068 at different stages and it was-- You couldn't-- 713 00:31:12,068 --> 00:31:13,620 You couldn't accommodate. 714 00:31:13,620 --> 00:31:16,275 Well, I-- I feel the obligation a little deeper 715 00:31:16,275 --> 00:31:18,275 to the littlest ones because of the... 716 00:31:18,758 --> 00:31:19,896 of their needs. 717 00:31:19,896 --> 00:31:22,310 I felt like that's all you saw were the little children 718 00:31:22,310 --> 00:31:24,034 and you stopped seeing your other children. 719 00:31:24,034 --> 00:31:25,758 - Um... - You became so hyper focused 720 00:31:25,758 --> 00:31:27,379 on the needs of little kids, 721 00:31:27,379 --> 00:31:29,724 you stopped seeing the other kids' needs. 722 00:31:29,724 --> 00:31:33,379 Kody has always made it a point 723 00:31:33,379 --> 00:31:35,965 to be part of his kids' lives, 724 00:31:35,965 --> 00:31:37,482 especially when they're younger. 725 00:31:37,482 --> 00:31:40,655 I think it's easier for him to forget that 726 00:31:40,655 --> 00:31:45,413 he should still nurture relationships with his adult children as well. 727 00:31:46,103 --> 00:31:48,344 Listen, I didn't overreact 728 00:31:48,344 --> 00:31:49,862 to what was going on with Gabe and Garrison. 729 00:31:49,862 --> 00:31:51,310 But I think 730 00:31:52,137 --> 00:31:55,724 I went too extreme on how I felt. 731 00:31:56,896 --> 00:31:59,137 And in the end, it should've been 732 00:31:59,137 --> 00:32:01,344 just like, "We need to have a conversation," 733 00:32:01,344 --> 00:32:04,172 not that "You guys owe me an apology." 734 00:32:04,172 --> 00:32:07,000 You know, and anybody who is adult and making their own choices 735 00:32:07,000 --> 00:32:09,793 had to make their choices. They're free to do that 736 00:32:09,793 --> 00:32:11,689 but I had to be able to protect the babies. 737 00:32:13,103 --> 00:32:16,206 I wish Solomon and Ariella had the same value 738 00:32:16,206 --> 00:32:18,827 to the whole family that they see other people. 739 00:32:18,827 --> 00:32:21,034 See, I think those kind of statements are dangerous, 740 00:32:21,034 --> 00:32:23,137 Kody, because you assume a lot there. 741 00:32:23,137 --> 00:32:26,103 "I wish that everybody valued Sol and Ari the way that..." 742 00:32:26,103 --> 00:32:29,586 Like, so that I feel like there's a lot of assumption and judgement there. 743 00:32:29,586 --> 00:32:32,034 So that's the kind of place where we need a counsellor. 744 00:32:32,034 --> 00:32:33,793 I mean, it doesn't matter as much now 745 00:32:33,793 --> 00:32:36,000 but at the time, I felt like I was being gaslit, 746 00:32:36,000 --> 00:32:37,931 manipulated and lied to. 747 00:32:37,931 --> 00:32:40,448 Well, I think she's pointing her finger at, like, 748 00:32:40,448 --> 00:32:43,413 some kind of favoritism towards Solomon and Ariella, 749 00:32:43,413 --> 00:32:46,862 which is the same favoritism I always gave to any of the little kids, 750 00:32:46,862 --> 00:32:50,206 starting from Logan all the way through. 751 00:32:50,206 --> 00:32:52,586 When they're little, I give them a lot. 752 00:32:52,586 --> 00:32:55,758 When they're adults, I still give them a lot 753 00:32:55,758 --> 00:32:59,137 but I don't feel like my obligation is the same to them. 754 00:32:59,137 --> 00:33:00,310 You know, okay. 755 00:33:00,310 --> 00:33:02,827 We're just gonna go the rounds again here. I think-- 756 00:33:02,827 --> 00:33:04,827 But you never validated my position, 757 00:33:04,827 --> 00:33:06,310 - the position that I was... - And you're not listening... 758 00:33:06,310 --> 00:33:08,241 - ...to me either. - ...forced into like this experience. 759 00:33:08,241 --> 00:33:09,793 See, I-- Anyway. 760 00:33:09,793 --> 00:33:11,620 I am listening to you, Janelle, 761 00:33:11,620 --> 00:33:14,379 because what you're trying to do is you're trying to lay it... 762 00:33:14,379 --> 00:33:16,586 - No, I'm just-- - ...on an idea that 763 00:33:16,586 --> 00:33:20,206 I didn't want to be around you and that's not true at all. 764 00:33:20,206 --> 00:33:23,413 No, I just asked you if you still want to live plural marriage. 765 00:33:24,172 --> 00:33:25,448 'Cause I'm not sure. 766 00:33:27,689 --> 00:33:31,172 I'm not really inclined to stay in this relationship with Kody. 767 00:33:31,172 --> 00:33:33,896 I don't feel like I'm getting what I deserve from him. 768 00:33:33,896 --> 00:33:35,724 Listen, I'm pretty independent. 769 00:33:35,724 --> 00:33:38,103 I don't need a lot from him 770 00:33:38,103 --> 00:33:41,586 but when it comes down to where he all of a sudden 771 00:33:41,586 --> 00:33:43,068 doesn't wanna be a father to my kids 772 00:33:43,068 --> 00:33:45,413 because they disagree with him, 773 00:33:46,724 --> 00:33:49,482 that sort of changes the cost benefit equation 774 00:33:49,482 --> 00:33:52,000 for me in this marriage. 775 00:33:52,000 --> 00:33:54,517 I have always wanted to be a father to my children. 776 00:33:54,517 --> 00:33:56,827 It was my sole goal in life. 777 00:33:56,827 --> 00:34:00,724 If you're only concerned about how I am at your place, 778 00:34:00,724 --> 00:34:02,793 then you're a monogamist. 779 00:34:02,793 --> 00:34:08,034 So stop trying to act like I did something wrong for 20 years. 780 00:34:08,034 --> 00:34:10,931 You know what? It's true. I've been in a place where I don't feel like 781 00:34:10,931 --> 00:34:14,586 without being in plural marriage, we can be married. 782 00:34:14,586 --> 00:34:17,793 So it's like, "Okay, well, then we gotta figure out plural monogamy." 783 00:34:17,793 --> 00:34:19,931 'Cause we're not living plural marriage. 784 00:34:19,931 --> 00:34:21,206 We don't wanna be in one home. 785 00:34:21,206 --> 00:34:23,172 We don't have the function to do that. 786 00:34:23,172 --> 00:34:26,034 Plural monogamy is where you're not functioning as one family, 787 00:34:26,034 --> 00:34:29,517 you're multiple families. A husband with two families. 788 00:34:29,517 --> 00:34:32,931 So she's not interested in reconciling with Meri, 789 00:34:32,931 --> 00:34:36,827 and I understand 'cause I'm not sure Meri and I can reconcile. 790 00:34:36,827 --> 00:34:39,413 But she's not interested in a relationship with Robyn at all. 791 00:34:39,413 --> 00:34:41,310 So it'd be me at Robyn's house, 792 00:34:41,310 --> 00:34:43,448 and then me at Janelle's house. 793 00:34:43,448 --> 00:34:45,689 And these two families don't interact, 794 00:34:45,689 --> 00:34:47,586 that's plural monogamy. 795 00:34:47,586 --> 00:34:49,827 Kody's the one who actually brought up the word 796 00:34:49,827 --> 00:34:51,827 and the term 'plural monogamy' 797 00:34:51,827 --> 00:34:53,482 and he acts like it was my idea. 798 00:34:58,586 --> 00:35:00,655 I mean, honestly, for the last six weeks, 799 00:35:00,655 --> 00:35:03,482 I wasn't really sure I was gonna even stay. 800 00:35:05,620 --> 00:35:07,103 Hmm. 801 00:35:07,103 --> 00:35:09,344 Here's what I will say. I'm not leaving, 802 00:35:09,344 --> 00:35:11,034 I'm not throwing in the towel. 803 00:35:11,034 --> 00:35:13,896 I just need to be separate while we figure this out. 804 00:35:13,896 --> 00:35:18,068 Can you explain to me what's the value of the separation? 805 00:35:18,068 --> 00:35:19,551 'Cause I feel like 806 00:35:19,551 --> 00:35:24,344 I'm more aware of what I need when you're not there. 807 00:35:24,344 --> 00:35:26,758 You're there and I wanna just, like, forget everything 808 00:35:26,758 --> 00:35:28,758 and just be, like, just-- 809 00:35:28,758 --> 00:35:30,034 I'll lay back, I-- 810 00:35:30,034 --> 00:35:32,103 I know, but it's easier for me to have focus 811 00:35:32,103 --> 00:35:35,275 on what I need and and when I need to communicate to you. 812 00:35:36,413 --> 00:35:37,344 I don't get it. 813 00:35:37,344 --> 00:35:39,896 The punishment seems way beyond the crime. 814 00:35:39,896 --> 00:35:43,344 Maybe that's just a wakeup call for me. 815 00:35:43,344 --> 00:35:45,827 Maybe she's not interested in this at all. 816 00:35:46,655 --> 00:35:48,344 Maybe she's 817 00:35:48,344 --> 00:35:51,068 got what she needed and she's moving on. 818 00:35:51,068 --> 00:35:53,103 We need a redefinition. 819 00:35:54,620 --> 00:35:58,206 I still am not 100% sure we can save it. 820 00:35:58,206 --> 00:35:59,275 - Really? - No. 821 00:35:59,275 --> 00:36:00,689 You don't think it's just gonna be... 822 00:36:00,689 --> 00:36:01,896 - No, because sometimes... - Like-- 823 00:36:01,896 --> 00:36:03,965 ...I'm really angry still. Like... 824 00:36:03,965 --> 00:36:06,275 I don't know. 825 00:36:06,275 --> 00:36:10,551 I-- I don't really have any kind of estate or anything, Kody. 826 00:36:10,551 --> 00:36:11,862 I don't have anything in my name. 827 00:36:11,862 --> 00:36:14,137 I have the properties all mishmashed. 828 00:36:14,137 --> 00:36:16,517 Yeah, but you've got all that property is... 829 00:36:16,517 --> 00:36:18,862 I know but I mean, I just don't, I don't really have... 830 00:36:18,862 --> 00:36:20,827 Uh, you know, I mean, like, I... 831 00:36:20,827 --> 00:36:23,482 I don't know, there's a lot to unpack. 832 00:36:23,482 --> 00:36:25,827 We have to pay off the property, like, he sits here-- 833 00:36:25,827 --> 00:36:28,275 He moved heaven and earth to get this house for Robyn. 834 00:36:28,275 --> 00:36:31,448 They-- they kept all their crap in U-Hauls for months. 835 00:36:31,448 --> 00:36:34,896 They lived in it as a short-term rental before they even bought it. 836 00:36:34,896 --> 00:36:38,206 I'm sitting here, like, "Wow, I am stuck. I am stagnant." 837 00:36:38,206 --> 00:36:40,448 Janelle has the same assets as me. 838 00:36:40,448 --> 00:36:43,448 Robyn's house isn't an asset, it's a bank's asset. 839 00:36:43,448 --> 00:36:47,620 We have to house our children in that house for another 15 years. 840 00:36:47,620 --> 00:36:50,620 I am not stopping us from doing that, okay? 841 00:36:50,620 --> 00:36:52,103 - Okay, I'm just saying... - That's-- I'm not-- 842 00:36:52,103 --> 00:36:54,896 ...I don't really, 'cause, like, when you first left, I thought, "Crap. 843 00:36:54,896 --> 00:36:57,034 I don't have anything. I don't have anything in my name." 844 00:36:57,862 --> 00:37:00,137 I don't have anything. 845 00:37:00,137 --> 00:37:02,793 This sounds like it's about money for Janelle. 846 00:37:02,793 --> 00:37:06,206 It's like, "Have I always just been a resource for you?" 847 00:37:06,206 --> 00:37:10,103 I am completely vulnerable. If I decide to leave Kody, I have nothing. 848 00:37:10,103 --> 00:37:15,724 If I can't provide everything, I-- I'm not of value? 849 00:37:15,724 --> 00:37:17,137 Oh, hell. 850 00:37:17,137 --> 00:37:20,551 It's wild, it is wild, the disconnect here. 851 00:37:32,551 --> 00:37:35,551 I feel like we did a lot of work in Las Vegas. 852 00:37:35,551 --> 00:37:38,689 And for whatever reason, the only progress we made 853 00:37:38,689 --> 00:37:43,931 was Christine's exit, and that's not how I view progress. 854 00:37:43,931 --> 00:37:46,896 In other words, she just finally decided what she wanted. 855 00:37:50,275 --> 00:37:51,068 Kinda... 856 00:37:51,068 --> 00:37:52,896 And here we are. 857 00:37:52,896 --> 00:37:55,310 Christine's getting closer and closer to the edge. 858 00:37:55,310 --> 00:37:57,793 I'm hearing rumors, I ask her about it 859 00:37:57,793 --> 00:37:59,275 She's like, "I'm not threatening to leave you." 860 00:37:59,275 --> 00:38:00,689 I don't know if that's because-- 861 00:38:00,689 --> 00:38:05,172 Yeah, I don't-- I don't know how to be involved in that particular 862 00:38:05,172 --> 00:38:07,137 relationship, do you know what I mean? I understand-- 863 00:38:07,137 --> 00:38:09,137 Well, am I supposed to bottle it up and not talk about it? 864 00:38:09,137 --> 00:38:11,206 No, I'm just saying, like, 865 00:38:11,206 --> 00:38:13,586 - yes, I mean, I want you to talk about-- - She's gonna go. 866 00:38:13,586 --> 00:38:15,000 She's gonna find somebody she's dating 867 00:38:15,000 --> 00:38:17,862 and she's gonna vomit all over about her divorce. 868 00:38:17,862 --> 00:38:21,275 - About her marriage. - Okay, and I'm not trying to shut you down. 869 00:38:21,275 --> 00:38:23,965 - I don't know how... - To talk about it might be just 870 00:38:24,655 --> 00:38:26,793 counter-productive, I guess. 871 00:38:26,793 --> 00:38:29,689 I just don't wanna start this conversation up yet again 872 00:38:29,689 --> 00:38:31,827 for the umpteenth time in our conversation. 873 00:38:31,827 --> 00:38:34,103 Be a big boy and reconcile. 874 00:38:34,103 --> 00:38:36,620 You've been bitching about that for six months now. 875 00:38:36,620 --> 00:38:39,689 Get over it and reconcile it and move on. 876 00:38:39,689 --> 00:38:42,448 Janelle, come on. I mean, you weren't having 877 00:38:42,448 --> 00:38:44,965 a great experience in Las Vegas? 878 00:38:44,965 --> 00:38:47,620 - No, I mean, Kody, I still-- - I mean, I need to know because... 879 00:38:47,620 --> 00:38:50,068 - No, I-- - And that's so much unwound for me 880 00:38:50,068 --> 00:38:52,517 how much, I thought we were like-- 881 00:38:52,517 --> 00:38:54,413 I'm sitting there, this smiling idiot, 882 00:38:54,413 --> 00:38:56,448 and it turns out later that it's like, 883 00:38:56,448 --> 00:38:58,241 "No, that was a [bleep] experience." 884 00:38:58,241 --> 00:38:59,758 - I'm like, "All right, then tell me." - Oh, no. 885 00:38:59,758 --> 00:39:02,413 No, I thought we had some good years in Vegas, for sure. 886 00:39:02,413 --> 00:39:04,931 - I was sprouting poetry! - I know. 887 00:39:04,931 --> 00:39:07,655 - So that's, Kody-- - I was following you around. 888 00:39:07,655 --> 00:39:10,620 - I was like, we were-- - I know, I know. 889 00:39:10,620 --> 00:39:14,000 Well, he's like, "We had this really great time in Vegas for a couple of years." 890 00:39:14,000 --> 00:39:16,413 Yeah, but that doesn't mean, it's... 891 00:39:16,413 --> 00:39:19,379 That it somehow excuses this right now. 892 00:39:20,241 --> 00:39:21,655 Janelle denies this 893 00:39:21,655 --> 00:39:25,344 but I had a renaissance with Janelle in Las Vegas. 894 00:39:25,344 --> 00:39:27,448 I mean, I miss you, honey. I miss you. 895 00:39:27,448 --> 00:39:30,000 And I just don't know how to fix this or figure this out 896 00:39:30,000 --> 00:39:32,206 but I don't wanna just... 897 00:39:32,206 --> 00:39:34,724 'Cause you and I have a tendency to be like, you come back 898 00:39:34,724 --> 00:39:37,793 and we sort of just forget all the hard stuff and we just... 899 00:39:37,793 --> 00:39:40,344 - We sweep it under the carpet. - ...it's in our little place. I... 900 00:39:40,344 --> 00:39:42,586 I need something different, you know, this time. 901 00:39:42,586 --> 00:39:43,655 Well, I agree. 902 00:39:43,655 --> 00:39:45,620 We need to be conscious about our relationship 903 00:39:45,620 --> 00:39:47,379 and how we're working it out and what we're doing. 904 00:39:47,379 --> 00:39:50,241 It was just easier 'cause you and I, our conversation is amazing. 905 00:39:50,241 --> 00:39:52,000 I miss all our conversation. 906 00:39:52,000 --> 00:39:55,310 I don't know, maybe we weren't taking enough care of our relationship. 907 00:39:55,310 --> 00:39:57,448 Our actual marriage relationship. 908 00:39:59,482 --> 00:40:01,448 I do miss Kody. 909 00:40:01,448 --> 00:40:03,896 We are very best friends, we have a lot of conversations. 910 00:40:03,896 --> 00:40:08,137 I miss him in my bed, I miss him in my house, I miss him. 911 00:40:08,137 --> 00:40:10,758 But I'm not being treated the way I deserve to be treated here. 912 00:40:12,931 --> 00:40:15,482 Well, this went much better than I thought. I was sort of-- 913 00:40:15,482 --> 00:40:17,896 - What'd you think that was gonna happen? - I don't know. 914 00:40:17,896 --> 00:40:19,793 - I don't know. - You didn't think that I missed you? 915 00:40:19,793 --> 00:40:21,862 Well, no, 'cause... 916 00:40:21,862 --> 00:40:24,172 You didn't think I want to kiss you on the lips and see you again? 917 00:40:25,862 --> 00:40:28,482 Here's the thing, you and I can be simple. 918 00:40:28,482 --> 00:40:30,000 It's everything else 919 00:40:30,551 --> 00:40:32,586 that is complicated. 920 00:40:32,586 --> 00:40:35,275 It's like, yes, on a basic level, we are simple. 921 00:40:35,275 --> 00:40:37,137 If there was nothing going on but he and I, 922 00:40:37,137 --> 00:40:39,448 and we're on some sort of desert island, 923 00:40:39,448 --> 00:40:41,068 we would be great. 924 00:40:41,068 --> 00:40:42,620 Let me tell you, we would be great. 925 00:40:43,344 --> 00:40:45,931 But no, life is not that. 926 00:40:45,931 --> 00:40:50,241 I mean, this whole thing with Christine is, that's very, very complicated. 927 00:40:50,241 --> 00:40:53,413 You and I are married. You and I are gonna work this out. 928 00:40:53,413 --> 00:40:56,275 That's not going to matter, there'll be a safe place here. 929 00:40:56,275 --> 00:40:58,620 It is the weirdest thing in the world, you have to understand. 930 00:40:58,620 --> 00:41:01,517 To be getting divorced from one wife 931 00:41:01,517 --> 00:41:03,758 while you're having a relationship 932 00:41:03,758 --> 00:41:06,379 - with another wife. - I can imagine it's a conflict, yeah. 933 00:41:06,379 --> 00:41:07,517 - For sure. - It's weird. 934 00:41:08,655 --> 00:41:10,931 Well, it went better than Janelle expected. 935 00:41:10,931 --> 00:41:14,034 I kinda thought that we would reconcile right here. 936 00:41:14,034 --> 00:41:16,551 And she's like, "No, I'm... I'm enjoying my independence, 937 00:41:16,551 --> 00:41:19,827 this freedom too much so I wanna stay separated." 938 00:41:21,896 --> 00:41:24,103 More in my mind, it went well 939 00:41:24,103 --> 00:41:29,000 because I'm deeply committed to never triggering again or becoming angry. 940 00:41:29,000 --> 00:41:31,931 If I see those triggers coming, then I'm gonna stop. 941 00:41:33,965 --> 00:41:36,103 I don't know. I told him we need a counsellor, 942 00:41:36,103 --> 00:41:37,655 we need a counsellor, we need a counsellor. 943 00:41:38,862 --> 00:41:40,965 Here's the thing. If he wanted it, 944 00:41:40,965 --> 00:41:43,827 I might, maybe, maybe I would try to work on it. 945 00:41:43,827 --> 00:41:46,000 But if he doesn't want it, I'm not gonna sit here 946 00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:49,103 and put all the effort into trying to create this 947 00:41:49,103 --> 00:41:52,241 because I-- I think there's something better for me. 948 00:41:53,620 --> 00:41:55,758 Next time on Sister Wives... 949 00:41:56,344 --> 00:41:57,655 If Kody changed, 950 00:41:57,655 --> 00:42:00,827 would you ever wanna form marriage with him again? 951 00:42:00,827 --> 00:42:03,172 Yes, but I think it's unrealistic. 952 00:42:05,310 --> 00:42:08,275 Janelle keeps telling me she doesn't enjoy our time together. 953 00:42:08,275 --> 00:42:11,241 But I don't wanna break up. 954 00:42:11,241 --> 00:42:13,620 I think he just likes to string people along. 955 00:42:13,620 --> 00:42:15,000 He's exhausting. 956 00:42:16,551 --> 00:42:19,241 Meri, he talks about us all owning the property still. 957 00:42:19,241 --> 00:42:22,965 There's no question, Robyn. He's done with me. 958 00:42:22,965 --> 00:42:25,068 Please, figure it out with us here. 959 00:42:28,172 --> 00:42:30,413 I'm growing and I need something different. 960 00:42:31,689 --> 00:42:33,206 What do you mean "something different"? 961 00:42:33,206 --> 00:42:35,655 Like, I don't wanna be married anymore.