Pam: Listen, Benson, we need to talk.
We are talking!
Ooh! Want to hear how many push-ups
I did at training today?
No, we need to really talk.
Oh. Okay.
This...this isn't working for me anymore.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Benson, you're a great guy, but, I have no idea
when you're coming back, or -- or if you're coming back.
Sure, sure.
You know, statistically, the further away
two mates are from each other, the less likely it is
that their relationship will last.
[ Voice breaking ] I've done the calculations,
and our odds are only 1.35%.
Mm-hmm.
I'm -- I'm sorry, Benson.
It's not you, it's just math.
I think we should just be friends.
I get it. I was sent millions of miles into space
against my will, you're back on Earth.
Are you sure you're okay?
I totally understand.
I am go-o-od.
[ Sobbing ]
Pa-a-a-m!
Why?!
[ Thud! ]
No-o-o-o.
[ Whimpers ]
Okay, okay, okay. My turn.
Hmm? Hmm-hmm?
Would you rather have spaghetti for fingers
or have spiders crawl out of your mouth
every time you yawn?
Hmm. That's a good one.
If I eat my spaghetti fingers, do they grow back?
Yeah, but they're whole wheat pasta.
Aw! Sick dude!
Well in that case, I got to go with...
Uh...
[ Somber piano music plays ]
[ Slurping ]
Mm... Uh-oh.
Um, hey, buddy.
Everything okay, man?
No. Pam dumped me.
I've been eating all these wings,
but they're not making me feel any better.
Hey, wait, didn't you and Pam eat wings on your first date?
Oh, no!
That's why they're not working!
They're just making me think about Pam!
Whoa, whoa! Forget about wings!
Yeah, these space wings are whack anyways.
We know what'll make you feel better.
What?
Um... Um...
Frrrri... Frrrrii...
Together: Fries!
Fries?
Crispy, delicious fries.
I'm talking curly!
Criss-cut! Wedge-cut.
Crinkle-cut!! Shoe-string!
Artisanal salt, yo!
Yeah! Fries will fill the void in my soul!
Whew! We really dodged a bullet on that one.
Where can I find fries?
[ Gasps ]
[ Panting ]
Wedge-cut, criss-cut, crinkle-cut, wedge-cut,
criss-cut, crinkle-cut, shoe-strings.
[ Laughs ]
I think I'm starting to feel better alread--
[ Smash! ]
Oh, my gosh! It was a hit and run!
That ice cream truck guy just took off!
Are you okay?
Huh? Where am I? Who are you?
I'm Roxy, and you're in my fry truck.
Great! I'm Benson.
Can I get an order of fries?
I'm sorry, but we sold out in, like, 10 minutes.
Got to kick you out. I'm about to go on a supply run.
Ugh, typical.
The saddest day of my life, then I get hit by a truck,
and now I can't even get fries.
Why did I think fries could make me happy again?
This was dumb.
Sorry to bother you, Roxy.
Or if you want to tag along with me on my supply run,
I can make you a fresh batch when I'm done.
Really? You'd do that for me?
My fries are the best in the galaxy, Benson.
We're gonna turn that frown upside down.
Wait, are you smiling?
Yep. "Roxy's Fries --
Guaranteed to put a smile on your face!"
All right.
So, we're just going for a quick grocery store run or something?
[ Laughs ] Not if you want the good stuff.
[ Keyboard clacking ]
[ Spaceship engine whirring ]
This is the potato planet mine.
For the good stuff,
we got it go way down there to the bottom.
You sure we can't just go to the grocery store?
Hey, there's a reason my fries are the best in the galaxy.
Come on!
Ow! That kind of hurt.
So, what do we do now?
Now we dig.
You're the boss.
[ Up-tempo music plays ]
Whew! This is actually kind of fun!
I think I see a smile coming on.
Oh, no! Potato bugs!
[ Clicking, growling ]
Run!
[ Buzzing ]
[ Screams ]
Aaaaaaah!
I just
want
some fries!
[ Grunts ]
I'm trying to get through a rough day,
and I don't have time for this right now!
[ Screams ]
Benson! Help me!
Aah!
[ Grunts ] Roxy! Are you okay?
I...I think so.
Good. We better get out of here.
I can't believe you did that.
Okay, we got potato. What's next?
Um, right!
Uh, we need oil.
[ Keyboard clacking ]
Okay. Barrel's in place.
Great. I'll open the valve. [ Grunts ]
Oh, here. I'll get that.
Thanks! I guess chivalry isn't dead.
So, if you want to talk about your bad day, you can.
I can offer a shoulder to cry on.
I mean -- Well, not literally, but --
Uh, thanks.
I guess it's just hard being single and in space.
I'm single and in space, too!
So, um, do you have any hobbies?
Well, I used to be a drummer in a rock band.
Oh. A rock band? [ Giggles ]
Oh, yeah, back in the day, I was all,
"Two-three-four -- doon-doon-dat, doon-doon-dat!"
Bubba-dubba-dubba-dubba, doon-doon-dat!
Doon-doon-dat, pshhh!
[ Whirring ] Huh?
[ Laughs ] Benson, you goo -- oof?
[ Mid-tempo music plays ]
Mm. Oh, yeah. That's better.
Whew! So, where to next?
Uh, we got to cut the potatoes.
[ Keyboard clacking ]
[ Grunts ]
Uh...
[ Grunts in slow motion ]
Uh...
[ Grunts in a deep voice ]
[ Deep voice ] Roxy? Hey, Roxy?
[ Normal voice ] Earth to Roxy!
Everything okay?
Oh! Uh... [ Chuckles nervously ]
Sorry! I, ah -- I um,
I've got to go make a phone call.
Excuse me!
[ Cellphone dialing ]
[ Ringing ] Come on, come on...
[ Cellphone ringing ]
Roxy! Hey, girl!
Crystal!
Listen, I -- I need some advice.
Ooh, I know what that means.
[ Giggles ] You have a crush.
[ Giggles nervously ] Oh, well, yeah.
[ Gasps ] Is he cut?
How many karats is he?
[ Giggles ] Well, that's the thing.
He's, uh -- Oh, boy --
[ Laughs ] He's an organic.
[ Gasps ] Get out! An organic?
The ultimate taboo.
I don't know if he's into me.
I-I always mess this kind of thing up.
Roxy, quit worrying so much.
You're a stone-cold rox!
Stop being such a pebble and be boulder.
Flirt with him a bit.
Take him to the most romantic place in the universe.
You got this, girl!
Uhh, I got to roll, Rox.
It's like a quarry out here.
Crystal, you are a gem. Thanks!
Hey, Slater, wait up!
[ Exhales sharply ]
Oh, hey. Sorry about that.
Wow, you cut those fast.
You know, you're pretty good at this.
Yeah? Are you hiring?
[ Laughs ] [ Laughs ] Yeah!
Maybe we should go into business together.
What do you say? You want to be be my sous-chef?
[ Thud! ] [ Gasps ] Oh, my gosh!
Are you okay?
Whoa, this place is awesome, Roxy.
Oh, yeah! [ Laughs ]
I must have forgot this was here.
It's amazing.
Roxy... Mm-hmm?
This day started off being one of the worst days of my life,
but you made it into one of the best.
Thanks for making it special.
Things aren't so bad after all.
So, we're on the same page then?
Uh, sure?
[ Romantic music plays ]
Hmm?
Uh...
[ Crash! ] Oh, ow!
[ Gasp ] What was that?
"What was that?" I can't believe you!
I kiss you and all you say is "Ow"?
Wait, you did what now?
[ Sniffling ] I have to go.
Roxy, wait!
Please stop!
[ Wind howling ]
Roxy!
[ Sobs ]
Roxy!
**
[ Engine starts, tires screech ]
Roxy!
[ Tires screech ]
Aaah!
It's all right.
That's what insurance is for.
Come on, Roxy. Where are you?
Roxy!
[ Horn honks ]
Roxy, wait!
[ Grunting ]
[ Thud! ]
Who-o-o-o-a-a-a-a!
[ Cracking ]
Aaah!
[ Screams ]
Benson!
As long as we keep it under light-speed, that should hold.
Look, Roxy, about earlier, I'm really sorry.
It's okay. I get it.
No, I just want you to know it's not about you.
You're a really cool girl,
and, honestly, I think you're great but...
[ Sighs ]
See, the whole reason I wanted fries
was to try to feel better because --
because my girlfriend dumped me this morning.
Oh, Benson.
It's not the first time I've been dumped...
or the second... or the third.
It's happened a lot.
I mean, Dumptown is a place, and I've been there Roxy.
It still hurts and, well, I'm kind of a mess right now.
I hope you understand.
Yeah.
Hey, you know what we need?
French fries.
**
Oh, we forgot the salt.
No, we didn't.
My secret ingredient -- butt salt.
Oh, wow. Those are great fries!
Feel better?
I do. Me too.
Mmm. This is so good!
Oh, here comes the best part!
Hey, Roxy, are you smiling?
I sure am.
Ohhhhhhhh!
Time to kick this up a notch. [ Gun warbles ]
Dude, you can't shoot at maximum power.
Your little body can't handle it.
You don't know what my body is capable of.
Eh, those new curtains really tie the room together, eh?
Yeah, eh? More maple syrup for your pancakes, eh?
Oh, I'm sorry! So sorry! Oh, gee!
[ Fire alarm ringing ]
The Canadians?! Of all people!
They're the most pleasant group on the entire Space Tree.
I said I was sorry.
You're a loose cannon, Rigby,
and I won't tolerate your unsafe behavior anymore!
Unsafe?! I'm totally --
Who-oa, who-o-o-oa!
...safe?
I'm putting you on probation.
That means no more target practice,
no off-site privileges,
and, of course, no food trucks.
[ Gasps ] But tomorrow is Roxie's Famous Fry Truck!
Her butt salt is delicious!
Guess it's no butt salt for you.
Can't you let me slide just this once?
Hmm.
If you pass the Space Tree safety test,
I'll let you off the hook.
But I suggest you start studying now.
This thing's drier than a bowl of pretzels on Dust Planet 9.
Come on, Rawls. I just graduated high school.
I'm not gonna read that thing.
Well, there is another way for those less, uh, literate.
Name it.
Perkins, awaken Spacey McSpacetree.
[ Alarm buzzes ]
[ Alarm beeping ]
[ Air hisses ]
Hey, everybody!
[ Laughs ]
Hello, Spacey. Been a while.
Who is this guy?
Rigby, this is Spacey McSpacetree,
our beloved mascot.
He's been in cryo-sleep for the last 30 years.
[ Scoffs ] That costume sure looks like it's from 30 years ago.
Co-o-stume?
Hey! Show him some respect!
He's gonna stick with you until you pass the test.
That's right.
You can't be Safey McSafety without Spacey McSpacetree.
It's certainly nice to wake up to a new friend.
Put 'er there, Rigby.
Whoa! Careful, now.
That's a very unsafe handshake you got there.
We're gonna have to work on that.
[ Groans ]
So, in conclusion, the seat belt always go over the waist.
Do you need another demonstration?
Ugh! I got it!
You already showed me, like, five times.
[ Gasps ]
Pump the brakes there, amigo!
That's a safety violation waiting to happen.
I was just putting it down. I wasn't gonna spill it.
[ Sighs ] Okay, picture this.
Say you're walking around, minding your own business,
Then bam! You knock into the table.
Aw, come on!
Then, next thing you know -- Whoop!
...you end up hurting yourself.
Or worse.
Whoa! [ Grunts ]
You end up in the hospital.
Ugh! You did that on purpose.
That would never happen in real life.
Hey, what's the commotion in here?
Whoa! Aaah!
[ Grunts ]
Oh, Benson!
W-W-W-Whoa!
[ Whimpering ] Bad show!
See?
Come on, bro! Dig deep!
[ Grunts ]
Huh? What?
[ Chuckling ]
Zero G!
[ Laughter ]
Aw.want to pretend like I can lift heavy stuff.
Stupid probation.
They're not even wearing helmets in there!
Uno momento, Rig-bud.
[ Laughter ] [ Door opens ]
Hey, guys.
Having a good time?
Whoops!
[ Crash ]
Still look fun to you?!
Dude, what's wrong with your new friend?
He's not my friend!
He's just teaching me about safety
so I can get off probation.
Why didn't you just read the safety manual?
Yeah, bro. It's a pretty informative read.
Well, I wish I knew that before I got stuck
with this crazy tree guy following me around
and judging my every move!
Rigby! That's a safety violation!
Don't you know that 7 out of 10 lunchtime injuries
are directly related to tray-slamming?
This could've been you!
[ All gasp ]
Whoa, eh! Oh, sorry. I'm sorry. Sorry.
Spacey! What's your problem?!
Hey, I'm just watching your back, buddy.
I still got to teach you about safety with music.
[ Mid-tempo synth pop playing ]
Safe-- Safey McSafety.
[ Snores ] Dude, turn! Turn!
Aah! Got to be safe!
If I'm not safe, he'll show up.
Dude, are you all right? You look horrible.
It's Spacey!
I got to get him off my back once and for all!
Yeah, you got to pass that test.
I can't take much more of that guy.
Don't worry. I have a plan. [ Chuckles ]
Take the wheel!
Hey! Where are you going?!
Aren't you on proba-- [ Gasps ]
So, Spacey says you're ready for this?
Look -- I even have written permission.
Hmm.
Looks like 30 years of cryo-sleep
did a number on his penmanship.
But if Spacey says you're ready, you're ready.
This is our testing overlook machine,
or, as we like to call it, T.O.M.
It's proficient in all forms of safety protocol.
Hello, T.O.M. This is Rigby.
Hello, Rigby. I look forward to grading your test.
Whoa. This is a test?
Does it come with a crazy pencil or something?
No, there's no pencil.
Just call out your answer, and it will fill in automatically.
Once it's complete, insert it into T.O.M.
Good luck.
Ugh! How long does he want me to do this?
[ Siren wailing ] Huh?
Rigby, old buddy, old pal.
Couldn't help but notice
you were driving a little erratically back there.
That's not very...
safe?!
Uhhhhh...
Whoa!
Where is he?! Where's Rigby?!
Dude, I don't know! I don't know!
[ Siren wailing ] Rigby!
Okay, question 17 -- "B."
[ Beep ]
All right. Question 18.
[ Siren wailing ] I'm coming, buddy!
Whoa!
Look both ways! You're not being safe!
I'm sorry!
Hmm. Hmm. Hmm.
Man, this is easier than I thought.
"C"! [ Beep ]
Goodbye, Spacey, and goodbye, probation.
[ Thud ] Rigby!
You're not ready!
[ Door opens ] Uh-oh. A, B, D, A, B, B, B!
[ Panting ]
[ Both grunting ]
Let go! No!
You still have so much to learn!
No! I'm through with you!
[ Grunts ]
[ Grunting ]
No!
[ Both groan ]
Yes!
Error. Test malfunction.
[ Warbling ]
[ Both gasp ]
[ Whirring ]
Now look what you've done!
Me?! It was you!
You're ruining my life!
[ Both gasp ]
Ruining your life?
I thought we were bros.
You're the first friend I've had in 30 years.
Don't make like a tree and leave me.
[ Gasps ] Spacey!
Aah! What do I do?! What do I do?!
Quick! Stop, drop, and roll!
[ Screaming ]
[ Whirring, ding ]
I got to finish the test!
Come on! We can still fix this!
W-What?! Us against that?!
That's totally unsafe!
Hey, sometimes you got to be unsafe to be safe.
[ Screams ]
Quick! Grab the test and read me the questions!
Which ones did you leave blank?
Uh...
27, 44, and 83!
[ Grunts ]
Okay, question 27.
"What do you do during a space-quake?"
[ Grunts ]
I know this.
Oh! Take cover underneath a table!
Aah! [ Ding ]
Nice one!
Okay, question 44.
"Where are you permitted to use Space Tree laser guns?"
Only in designated shooting areas.
[ T.O.M. whirs ] [ Gasps ] Or if we're under attack, of course.
Whaaa!
[ Ding ]
[ Grunts ]
Okay, last question.
"What should you never do with space soda?"
What are my options?!
"A" -- drink while operating heavy machinery.
"B" -- put it on the edge of a table.
"C" -- drink more than two bottles a day.
[ Screams ]
Come on, Rigby! We went over this!
Whoa!
[ Screams ]
[ Grunts ]
"D." [ Coughs ]
[ Ding ] All of the above.
[ Screams ]
[ Clank ] Safety test complete.
Processing results.
Congratulations. You pass.
[ Indistinct conversations ]
Hey, thanks, guys. Yeah, it worked out.
Thanks for helping me, Spacey.
No problem.
Sorry for being so clingy.
If I've learned anything,
it's that being too attached is emotionally unsafe.
Here.
You keep that safe for me.
You got it, friend.
Care for more of Roxie's food-truck fries, Rigby?
Or, should I say, Safey McSafety.
[ Chuckles ]
[ Gasps ] Safety violation!
Come on, bro. I'm not gonna spill it.
Oops.
Tea time.
[ Both scream ]
[ Fire alarm ringing ]
I'm going back to cryo-sleep.
[ Both laugh ]