[ BELL DINGS ]
>> AND VOILà.
OH, THIS CAKE LOOKS SO YUMMY!
AND NOW I'M GONNA EAT THE WHOLE
THING ALL BY MYSELF.
MMM!
>> Rigby: CA-A-A-A-A-KE.
>> Mordecai: WANT CAKE.
>> Both: NEED CAKE.
>> C.J.: WHY DON'T WE JUST GO
GET SOME CAKE?
>> Mordecai: ARE YOU KIDDING?
DO YOU KNOW HOW CRAZY THE CAKE
PRICES ARE IN THIS TOWN?
>> Eileen: EVER SINCE THAT
BAKERY CARTEL MOVED IN, THEY'VE
KEPT THE PRICES UP AND THE
SUPPLY DOWN.
>> Rigby: DARN BAKERS!
>> FELLOW AMERICANS, DOES THIS
EVER HAPPEN TO YOU?
>> IT'S SUSAN'S BIRTHDAY,
EVERYONE.
COME ON, LET'S SING.
* HAP--
>> AAAAAAAAH!
>> ARE YOU SICK TO DEATH OF THIS
TRIED OLD BIRTHDAY SONG?
>> YES, I AM!
>> WELL, BOY, HOWDY, SO AM I!
HI, IT'S ME -- FARMER JIMMY,
PART-TIME TURKEY FARMER AND
SOCIAL ADVOCATE, BUT YOU ALREADY
KNEW THAT.
BUT WHAT YOU MAY NOT KNOW IS
THAT OLD BIRTHDAY SONG OFFENDS
MY MUSICAL SENSIBILITIES SO
DEEPLY, I BARELY HAVE WORDS TO
DESCRIBE IT.
THAT'S WHY I'M HOLDING A CONTEST
TO WRITE A NEW BIRTHDAY SONG.
NOT ONLY WILL THE WINNER CREATE
HISTORY BY FINALLY OVERTHROWING
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY," BUT YOU ALSO
GET A YEAR'S SUPPLY OF OUR
FARM-FRESH BIRTHDAY CAKES!
>> BIRTHDAY CAKES ARE NOT
ACTUALLY FARM FRESH.
>> I'LL SEE YOU AT THE FARM --
NOT SINGING THAT SONG, BUT YOUR
NEW ONE!
>> Mordecai: DUDE, A YEAR'S
SUPPLY OF CAKE?
WE GOT TO WRITE THE NEXT
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY" SONG.
[ BIRDS CHIRPING ]
CAN WE GET THE NEXT THREE DAYS
OFF FROM WORK?
>> Benson: UM, NO.
>> Rigby: BUT, BENSON, WE HAVE
TO GO COMPETE IN A BIRTHDAY SONG
CONTEST.
IF WE DON'T WRITE A SONG TO
REPLACE "HAPPY BIRTHDAY" --
>> Benson: WAIT, THE SONG THAT
WINS THIS CONTEST WILL REPLACE
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY"?
YOU CAN GO TO THE CONTEST.
>> Both: NICE!
>> Benson: I'M COUNTING ON YOU
GUYS TO PUT THAT
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY" SONG IN ITS
GRAVE.
I CAN'T -- I JUST...
>> Mordecai: HEY, MUSCLE MAN.
>> Muscle Man: [ GRUNTS ]
THREE.
>> Mordecai: WILL YOU LISTEN TO
OUR NEW BIRTHDAY SONG AND TELL
US WHAT YOU THINK?
>> Muscle Man: POR SUPUESTO,
BRO.
>> Mordecai: OKAY, SO, THIS IS
THE FIRST THING WE CAME UP WITH,
SO IT MAY BE A LITTLE ROUGH
STILL.
>> Muscle Man: UNNECESSARY
INFORMATION NOTED.
>> Mordecai: READY?
>> Both: [ INHALE DEEPLY ]
[ LOUD CREAKING ]
[ CREAKING CONTINUES ]
>> Muscle Man: [ SNIFFLES ]
OKAY, ONE -- THAT SOUND WAS MY
NEW LEATHER WORKOUT BOOTS --
STILL BREAKIN' 'EM IN.
AND, TWO -- THAT SONG --
I'VE NEVER HEARD ANYTHING MORE
BEAUTIFUL.
>> Mordecai: I CAN'T BELIEVE WE
NAILED THE NEW SONG ON THE FIRST
TRY.
>> Rigby: I CAN BELIEVE IT.
WE'VE BEEN TOTALLY NAILING LIFE
RECENTLY.
>> Eileen: SO, HOW FAR AWAY IS
THIS FARM EXACTLY?
>> Mordecai: LOOKS LIKE IT'S
GONNA TAKE US ALL NIGHT.
>> Rigby: I'M GETTING HUNGRY!
>> C.J.: THERE SHOULD BE A DINER
COMING UP.
WE COULD STOP THERE.
>> Mordecai: ALL RIGHT.
[ INSECTS CHIRPING ]
>> Rigby: PIE. PIE.
CA-A-A-A-A-KE!
50 BUCKS A SLICE?!
>> QUIT YOUR GASPIN'.
IT'S A FAIR PRICE.
>> Eileen: NO DESSERT?
>> Rigby: NO THANKS TO
THE CAKE CARTEL.
>> Eileen: I CAN'T DECIDE
BETWEEN "SHERBET" OR "SHERBERT."
[ RHYTHMIC CLAPPING ]
>> * IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY,
BIRTHDAY *
* HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY
>> AAAH! MAKE IT STOP!
>> BUT IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY,
SWEETIE.
>> I DON'T WANT IT TO BE MY
BIRTHDAY IF THEY'RE GONNA SING
THAT SONG.
AAAH!
>> CAN'T SOMEBODY DO SOMETHING?
>> * HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY
>> C.J.: THAT POOR KID.
>> Eileen: OHH!
ARE ALL BIRTHDAY SONGS TERRIBLE?
>> Mordecai: DUDE.
>> * BIRTHDAY, BIRTHDAY
* HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY,
BIRTHDAY *
>> Mordecai: HOLSTER THEM HAND
CLAPS, BRO.
>> Both: [ INHALE DEEPLY ]
[ VACUUM CLEANER WHIRRING ]
[ ZWIP! ]
[ WHIRRING CONTINUES ]
[ WHIRRING STOPS ]
>> THAT SONG WAS SO COOL.
DID YOU GUYS WRITE THAT?
>> Mordecai: YEAH, WE'RE
ENTERING IT IN THIS BIRTHDAY
SONG CONTEST THING.
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]
[ TELEPHONE RINGS ]
>> YES?
WHAT?! A CONTEST?!
NO, NO, NO.
THANK YOU FOR LETTING ME KNOW.
[ DOOR CREAKS ]
>> [ GOBBLING ]
[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]
>> All: [ SNORING ]
>> Mordecai: HUH?
WE MADE IT!
>> WELL, THIS IS QUITE A
TURNOUT.
WELCOME ALL TO THE FIRST --
AND LAST -- FARMER JIMMY
BIRTHDAY SONG COMPETITION!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
ARE YOU FOLKS READY FOR A NEW
BIRTHDAY SONG...
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
...A SONG TO REPLACE THE MOST
OVERUSED SONG OF ALL TIME, ONE
THAT TAKES A BEAUTIFUL DAY OF
CELEBRATION AND TURNS IT INTO
THE WORST DAY OF YOUR LIFE?!
>> OHH.
>> YEAH.
>> GOOD, THEN!
EACH OF OUR CONTESTANTS WILL
PERFORM A NEW BIRTHDAY SONG, AND
OUR JUDGES WILL RATE THEM
1 THROUGH 10, WITH A HIGHEST
POSSIBLE TOTAL OF 30 LIT
CANDLES -- TO CLARIFY...
30 CANDLES -- GOOD.
ZERO CANDLES -- BAD.
AND THERE ARE NO TRICK CANDLES.
I'VE CHECKED.
IN CONCLUSION, THE CONTESTANT
WITH THE BEST SCORE WILL RECEIVE
A YEAR'S SUPPLY OF FARM FRESH
CAKES.
MAY THE BEST NEW BIRTHDAY SONG
WIN!
[ NOISEMAKER BLOWS ]
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> * IT'S NICE TO ENJOY
THE PRESENCE OF YOUR FRIENDS *
* NICE TO ENJOY SWEET TREATS
>> * BAKED A REAL FINE CAKE
* IT'S GONNA MAKE YOU SHAKE
* BAKED A REAL...
>> * AS WE MELT AWAY
BY CANDLELIGHT *
>> [ BLOWS ]
>> * AND HAVE A
HA-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-PPY... *
>> * SO I CAN SING YOU
A LITTLE SONG *
* 'BOUT THE DAY
YOU CAME OUT OF YOUR MOM *
>> MOM, GET OFF THE STAGE!
>> * PRESENTS ARE COMIN'
* B-B-B-B-B-BETTER ROLL UP
YOUR SLEEVES, SLEEVES, SLEEVES *
* S-S-S-S--
>> * HA-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-PPY
B-I-I-IRTHDAY *
* OOOH-OOH-OOH-OOH
[ FINALE PLAYS ]
[ FEEDBACK WHINES ]
>> [ GRUNTS ]
* AND JUST WHEN YOU THINK YOU'RE
SAFE *
* IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY AGAIN
AND AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN *
>> Both: AW.
>> * AND AGAIN
* PARTY HARD
[ UNDULATING ]
>> All: [ BLOWING ]
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> 28 -- NOW, THAT WAS A GOOD
BIRTHDAY.
MM, MM, MM, MM, MM!
THAT'S A TOUGH NUMBER TO BEAT,
AND ONLY ONE SONG LEFT IN OUR
COMPETITION.
PLEASE WELCOME LAST YEAR'S
THANKSGIVING SONG WINNERS,
MORDECAI AND RIGBY!
>> C.J.: WHOO!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> Mordecai: WELL, THIS IS JUST
OUR LITTLE VERSION OF
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY."
>> Both: [ INHALE DEEPLY ]
[ COUGHING ]
>> OH, NO! NO, NO!
>> OH, I'M SORRY.
DID SOMEBODY SAY MY NAME?
>> HAPPY BIRTHDAY HIMSELF.
>> THE GUEST OF HONOR IS HERE!
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
OH, QUITE THE PARTY.
[ SLURPS ]
I'VE HAD BETTER.
>> HEY, STOP THAT!
>> STOP WHAT?
>> HAPPY BIRTHDAY, YOU
SCOUNDREL, YOU'RE RUINING THE
CONTEST!
GET OFF OF MY STAGE!
>> OR WHAT -- YOU'RE NOT GONNA
INVITE ME TO YOUR BIRTHDAY
PARTY?
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
>> OHH!
[ CHOKING ]
>> Mordecai: DUDE, WE WERE JUST
ABOUT TO SING OUR SONG.
>> Rigby: YEAH, WHAT YOU JUST
DID WAS NOT COOL.
>> OH, YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT'S
NOT COOL?
WRITING A NEW BIRTHDAY SONG IS
WHAT'S NOT COOL.
AMERICA LOVES "HAPPY BIRTHDAY."
YOU LOVE "HAPPY BIRTHDAY,"
MORDECAI AND RIGBY.
>> Mordecai: THAT'S NOT TRUE!
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY" IS A TRIED, OLD
SONG, AND THE PEOPLE WANT
SOMETHING NEW.
ISN'T THAT RIGHT, AMERICA?
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> YEAH!
>> SHUT YOUR CAKEHOLE, AMERICA!
YOU'LL NEVER WIN THE BIRTHDAY
SONG CONTEST WHEN YOU'RE UP
AGAINST HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
* HA-A-A-P...PY BIRTHDAY
TO YOU *
>> NO! NO!
>> * HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
* HAPPY BIRTHDAY,
DEAR EVERYONE! *
[ LAUGHING EVILLY ]
* HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
>> Rigby: SO, WHAT DOES THAT --
>> AH!
>> Crowd: * HAPPY BIRTHDAY
TO YOU *
>> YES! [ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
>> Crowd: * HAPPY BIRTHDAY...
>> YEAH, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
>> Crowd: * ...TO YOU
>> TO YOU!
>> All: * HAPPY BIRTHDAY,
DEAR... *
>> * BOB
>> * AUSTIN
>> THAT'S RIGHT -- SAY THEIR
NAMES!
>> All: * HAPPY BIRTHDAY
TO YOU *
>> [ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
YOU'LL NEVER OVERTHROW MY SONG!
THERE'LL BE NO BIRTHDAYS WITHOUT
IT!
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
>> THEN ALL IS LOST.
I GUESS YOU CAN'T SOLVE EVERY
PROBLEM WITH AN OVERLY
COMPLICATED FARM-THEMED SONG
CONTEST.
GUESS I'LL HAVE TO THROW AWAY
THAT YEAR'S SUPPLY OF CAKE, BUT
YOU ALREADY KNEW THAT.
>> Both: WAIT! WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!
>> Mordecai: GIVE US THE CHANCE
TO SING OUR SONG.
>> GOODBYE! THANKS FOR COMING!
>> Both: [ INHALE DEEPLY ]
* TODAY'S GONNA BE A-OKAY
* 'CAUSE WE'RE CELEBRATIN'
YOUR BIRTHDAY *
* HAPPY BIRTHDAY, C.J.
* CELEBRATIN' YOUR BIRTHDAY
>> WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!
>> Both: * TODAY'S GONNA BE
A-OKAY *
* 'CAUSE WE'RE CELEBRATIN'
YOUR BIRTHDAY *
* HAPPY BIRTHDAY
>> * RANDALL
>> Both: * CELEBRATIN'
YOUR BIRTHDAY *
>> THAT SOUNDS SIMPLE AND FRESH.
>> HEY, THAT'S PRETTY CATCHY.
>> Both: * TODAY'S GONNA BE
A-OKAY *
* 'CAUSE WE'RE CELEBRATIN'...
>> NO, STOP IT!
>> All: * ...YOUR BIRTHDAY
* HAPPY BIRTHDAY, EVERYONE
* CELEBRATIN' YOUR BIRTHDAY
* TODAY'S GONNA BE A-OKAY
>> [ GROWLS ]
>> All: * 'CAUSE WE'RE
CELEBRATIN' YOUR BIRTHDAY *
* HAPPY BIRTHDAY, EVERYONE *
>> * HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
COME ON!
>> All: * CELEBRATIN' YOUR
BIRTHDAY *
>> AAH!
>> * HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO --
>> GET OFF OF MY STAGE!
>> All: * WE'RE CELEBRATIN'
YOUR BIRTHDAY *
* HAPPY BIRTHDAY, EVERYONE
[ ORGAN PLAYS ]
* CELEBRATIN' YOUR BIRTHDAY
* TODAY'S GONNA BE A-OKAY
* 'CAUSE WE'RE CELEBRATIN'
YOUR BIRTHDAY *
* HAPPY BIRTHDAY, EVERYONE
* CELEBRATIN' YOUR BIRTHDAY
* TODAY'S GONNA BE A-OKAY
* 'CAUSE WE'RE CELEBRATIN'
YOUR BIRTHDAY *
* HAPPY BIRTHDAY, EVERYONE
* CELEBRATIN' YOUR BIRTHDAY
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> 30 CANDLES -- A PERFECT
SCORE!
MORDECAI AND RIGBY ARE THE
WINNERS!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> FINE. WHO NEEDS YOU, ANYWAYS?
YOU SEE HOW YOU LIKE THE
LIMELIGHT, THE COLLECTING OF ALL
THOSE ROYALTIES.
AND JUST WAIT UNTIL PEOPLE START
GETTING SICK OF YOUR SONG --
THEN YOU'LL SEE HOW IT FEELS!
AND THEN YOU'LL ALL COME
CRAWLING BACK, BACK TO
GOOD 'OL HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
LATER, LOSERS!
[ ENGINE GRINDING ]
[ GRUNTS ]
[ ENGINE TURNS OVER ]
LATER, LOSERS!
>> Eileen: WOW! GREAT JOB, GUYS!
>> C.J.: YEAH, YOU WIPED THE
FLOOR WITH THAT CREEPY CAKE.
>> Mordecai: IT WAS NOTHING.
>> Rigby: NO BIGGIE.
>> WELL, CONGRATULATIONS, BOYS.
YOU CERTAINLY EARNED THAT YEAR'S
SUPPLY OF CAKES.
>> Both: YE-E-AH!
>> YOU'LL HAVE TO GO OVER SOME
DETAILS WITH MY LAWYER, BUT YOU
ALREADY KNEW THAT.
[ CLICKS TONGUE ]
>> JUST SIGN HERE TO CLAIM YOUR
CAKE AND ACKNOWLEDGE THAT YOUR
SONG WILL PROBABLY NEVER REPLACE
THE ORIGINAL "HAPPY BIRTHDAY"
SONG.
BRING IN THE LUMP SUM!
>> Mordecai: LUMP SUM?
[ BEEPING ]
[ BRAKES SQUEAL ]
>> C.J.: WELL, YOU GUYS WANTED
CAKE.
>> Eileen: [ LAUGHS ]
>> Both: FREE CAKE!
[ SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS ]
[ SNAPPING FINGERS ]
>> BLEH!
SHOPKEEP!
[ SNAPPING FINGERS ]
>> OH! UH, MR. RICH STEVE,
YOU'RE EARLY.
I THOUGHT WE'D AGREED THAT --
>> IS IT READY?
>> UH, YES, SIR.
I PUT THE FINISHING TOUCHES ON
IT JUST THIS MORNING.
BEHOLD!
[ BEEPS, WHIRRING ]
[ SLOOP! ]
BEFORE YOU STANDS THE GREATEST
TAILORING IN ALL OF HUMAN
HISTORY.
NOTE THE UNDERSTATED
PINSTRIPING,
BRAZILIAN WANDERING SPIDER
SILK LINING, AN UNPRECEDENTED
TWO INTERIOR POCKETS AND, OF
COURSE, EMBEDDED MILITARY-GRADE
WEAPONRY, WHICH ALLOWS THE
WEARER TO ANNIHILATE ANYTHING
THAT STANDS IN HIS WAY.
[ CHUCKLES ]
I THINK YOU'LL FIND THAT THIS
SUIT IS CERTAIN TO GRANT YOU THE
UNCONDITIONAL RESPECT OF YOUR
PEERS.
>> YOU'VE DONE WELL, MY FRIEND,
AND I TREAT MY FRIENDS RIGHT.
>> UM, SIR, THIS IS NOT THE
PRICE WE AGREED UPON.
>> LISTEN, PAL, I DIDN'T GET
STUPID RICH BY PAYING PEOPLE
WHAT I OWED THEM.
>> THIS SUIT REPRESENTS THE APEX
OF HUMAN INGENUITY!
IF YOU WON'T PAY WHAT IT'S
WORTH, I HAVE MANY BUYERS WHO
WILL!
>> OH, BIG MISTAKE.
GUARDS!
>> AAH! YOU'RE NOT WORTHY OF MY
CREATION!
>> AIN'T NOBODY GONNA WEAR THIS
SUIT BUT ME.
HOLD THIS.
AND THIS.
WHEN MY NEW SUIT AND I ARE A
SAFE DISTANCE AWAY, BLOW THIS
GUY TO SMITHEREENS.
>> UH, DO WE HAVE TO STAY IN
HERE?
COULDN'T WE, LIKE --
>> SHUT IT!
I'M NOT PAYING YOU TO NOT BLOW
YOURSELVES UP!
[ CHUCKLES ]
>> FATHER! NOOO!
>> [ GRUNTS ]
COME BACK HERE.
COME BACK HERE!
GUARDS, STOP HIM!
OH, RIGHT.
YOU CAN'T HIDE FOREVER, SUIT!
I PAID $10 FOR YOU!
I OWN YOU!
[ Echoing ] YOU...YOU...YOU!
>> Benson: ONE MOUNTED FISH.
>> Skips: GOT IT.
>> Mordecai: [ CHUCKLES ]
LET'S GO BORROW BENSON'S CAR AND
GO TO THE MALL.
>> Rigby: YEAH, HE WON'T CARE IF
WE'RE GONE ALL DAY.
[ CHUCKLES ]
[ DOOR OPENS, CLOSES ]
>> Benson: [ SIGHS ]
>> Skips: WHAT'S THE MATTER?
I THOUGHT YOU LOVED LOGGING THE
LOST & FOUND ITEMS.
>> Benson: NO, I DO.
IT'S JUST...I FEEL LIKE I'VE
TRIED EVERYTHING TO GET PEOPLE
TO RESPECT ME.
I'VE TRIED SCREAMING, YELLING,
FURIOUSLY POINTING -- NOTHING
WORKS.
[ SIGHS ]
SOME LIFE FOR A MANAGER.
HUH? WHAT'S THIS?
WOW.
WHO LOST THIS -- THE PRESIDENT?
MAN, I BET A GUY COULD GET SOME
REAL RESPECT IN A SUIT LIKE
THIS.
>> Skips: IT LOOKS LIKE YOUR
SIZE.
YOU SHOULD TRY IT ON.
>> Benson: HUH.
NOT BAD, RIGHT?
>> Skips: LOOKIN' SHARP.
>> Benson: MAKES MY BUTT LOOK A
BIT FLAT, THOUGH.
[ CREAKS ]
NICE.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
NOBODY EVER COMES BACK FOR THIS
STUFF, ANYWAY.
I'M GONNA KEEP IT.
[ BIRDS CHIRPING ]
MORNING, EVERYONE.
>> Muscle Man: DANG!
SICK DUDS, BRO.
>> Pops: INDEED.
>> Benson: [ CHUCKLES ]
UH, THANKS.
ANYWAY, I, UH --
>> Mordecai: AW, MAN, WE'RE
LATE.
I TOLD YOU WE DIDN'T HAVE TIME
TO GET TACOS.
[ BRAKES SQUEAL ]
>> Rigby: NAH, WE'RE FINE.
HE'S NOT EVEN HERE.
WAIT. WHO'S THE NEW GUY?
DID BENSON GET REPLACED BY A
MILLIONAIRE OR SOMETHING?
>> Benson: VERY FUNNY, GUYS.
TRY TO BE ON TIME, OKAY?
>> Mordecai: THAT IS BENSON.
>> Rigby: [ WHISTLES ]
SWEET THREADS!
DIG UP A RICH OLD UNCLE?
>> Benson: I DIDN'T DIG ANYBODY
UP, BUT THANKS.
I FEEL...GOOD.
>> Mordecai: WELL, WE'RE SORRY
FOR BEING LATE.
>> Rigby: YEAH.
WON'T HAPPEN AGAIN, SIR.
>> Benson: WAIT. WHO?
ME, SIR?
>> Mordecai: YEAH YOU, SIR.
YOU'RE THE BOSS, RIGHT?
>> Benson: YEAH, I AM THE BOSS.
LET'S GET THIS DAY STARTED.
[ UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ]
>> [ Deep voice ] HE-Y-Y!
[ MUSIC CONTINUES ]
>> Muscle Man: [ GROANS ]
>> Benson: HEY, JOE.
THE USUAL, PLEASE.
>> LOOKING CLASSY, BENSON.
ON THE HOUSE.
>> Benson: WELL, DON'T MIND IF
I --
>> AAAH!
[ GRUNTING ]
>> Benson: [ GASPS ]
HUH?
AAH! MY LEGS!
WHAT'S GOING ON?!
[ ELECTRICITY CRACKLING ]
AAAH!
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]
[ GRUNTS ]
>> OHH!
>> Benson: WHOA.
>> NICE WORK, SON.
LOOKS LIKE YOU COULD SHOW US
BOYS IN BLUE A THING OR TWO.
SHAME ABOUT THE SUIT, THOUGH.
>> Benson: AAH!
EASY. JUST A DAB.
HUH. THAT WAS EASY.
NO, NO!
NO, NO, NO, NO!
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!
NOOOO!
[ SOMBER MUSIC PLAYS ]
SUIT, YOU WERE THE BEST THING
THAT EVER HAPPENED TO ME.
YOU MADE ME FEEL [CHOMPING]
ALIVE, FULL OF POWER, FULL OF
STRONG...NESS.
TO YOU, SUIT!
MAY WE MEET AGAIN IN THE NEXT
LIFE!
[ MUSIC CONTINUES ]
[ SNORING ]
[ GROANS ]
MM. GOOD MORNING.
HUH? THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!
THIS IS EITHER A MIRACLE, OR
I'VE GONE INSANE.
BUT WHO CARES?
I LOOK GOOD.
>> YOU SURE DO, BENSON.
>> Benson: THANKS.
WHA-- WHO SAID THAT?
>> IT'S ME, BENSON -- THE SUIT.
>> Benson: YOU CAN TALK?
>> I CAN DO MANY THINGS.
>> Benson: WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY
ANYTHING BEFORE NOW?
>> I WANTED TO BE CERTAIN THAT
YOU WERE WORTHY.
INCOMPETENCE ASIDE, YOU SHOWED
ME THAT YOU CARED ABOUT ME WHEN
YOU TRIED TO CLEAN THAT STAIN.
I WAS CREATED FOR A DARK
PURPOSE, BENSON -- TO BE A
STATUS SYMBOL FOR EVIL MEN --
EVIL, MYSTERIOUS, POWERFUL,
HANDSOME, WEALTHY MEN.
BUT AFTER THESE LAST FEW DAYS,
I'VE REALIZED THAT I WOULD
RATHER BE WORN BY SOMEONE WITH
ABSOLUTELY NONE OF THOSE
QUALITIES.
I WANT TO LIVE A SIMPLE LIFE AS
THE SUIT OF A SIMPLE MAN.
YOU ARE THAT MAN, BENSON.
>> Benson: COOL.
>> I'LL NEVER LEAVE YOU, BENSON.
ALSO, IF YOU'RE INTERESTED, I
HAVE A FEW IDEAS FOR KEEPING
MORDECAI AND RIGBY IN LINE.
>> Benson: LET'S GO MANAGE A
PARK.
>> Muscle Man: I DON'T KNOW HOW
YOU DID IT, BRO, BUT WEARING
THAT SUIT TWO DAYS IN A ROW MADE
IT LOOK EVEN BETTER.
>> Mordecai: YEAH. IT'S AWESOME.
>> LOOKS GREAT.
>> Muscle Man: RIGHT?
>> Benson: [ CHUCKLES ]
GET USED TO IT.
I'M GONNA BE WEARING THIS THING
FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE.
>> UNFORTUNATELY FOR YOU, THAT
AIN'T GONNA THAT BE LONG.
>> Benson: HUH?
WHO ARE YOU?
>> I'M THE RIGHTFUL OWNER OF
THAT FANCY LITTLE THREE-PIECE
YOU'RE WEARING.
AND I'M GIVING YOU UNTIL THE
COUNT OF 10 TO HAND IT OVER
BEFORE MY GOONS FLATTEN THIS
PARK LIKE A WELL-IRONED SHIRT.
>> Benson: SUIT, IS THAT TRUE?
WHO IS THIS GUY?
>> IT'S TRUE.
HIS NAME IS RICH STEVE --
STEVE FOR SHORT -- AND HE KILLED
MY FATHER.
HE MUST'VE TRACKED ME DOWN FROM
MY BUILT-IN GPS SIGNAL.
>> Benson: THAT'S HORRIBLE!
>> Mordecai: WHAT THE HECK IS
GOING ON?
>> Rigby: AND IS BENSON TALKING
TO HIS SUIT?
>> Mordecai: I DON'T KNOW, BUT
THAT DUDE LOOKS PRETTY EVIL.
COME ON!
>> BENSON, I DON'T WANT TO BE
WORN BY THIS -- THIS MONSTER.
WILL YOU HELP ME?
>> Benson: WE'RE FAMILY NOW,
SUIT.
OF COURSE I WILL.
THE SUIT BELONGS WITH ME, STEVE.
BESIDES, YOU AND YOUR GOONS ARE
OUTNUMBERED.
YOU SHOULD LEAVE WHILE YOU STILL
CAN.
>> I SEE HOW IT IS.
WELL, LET'S SEE HOW YOU LIKE
THESE NUMBERS.
[ SNAPS FINGERS ]
[ BLADES WHIRRING ]
[ MACHINERY WHIRRING ]
YOUR MOVE, BENSON -- THE SUIT
OR YOUR LIFE.
>> Rigby: UH, MAYBE JUST GIVE
HIM THE SUIT.
>> Benson: THIS GUY'S HIRED AN
ENTIRE ARMY!
THE SIX OF US CAN'T FIGHT AN
ARMY!
>> NO. NOT THE SIX OF US --
JUST YOU AND ME.
>> Benson: WHAT?
AAH! SUIT, NO!
>> Mordecai: BENSON, WAIT!
>> Benson: AAAH!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!
THIS IS CRAZY!
>> JUST TRUST ME.
>> Benson: I'M GONNA DIE!
[ BLOWS LANDING ]
AAH!
WHOA.
>> BENSON, WORK WITH ME.
IF WE FIGHT AS ONE, WE CAN'T
FAIL.
>> Benson: I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING
ABOUT FIGHTING.
>> JUST LET LOOSE.
CHANNEL YOUR ANGER.
[ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ]
[ ELECTRICITY CRACKLES ]
>> Benson: [ GRUNTING ]
OW!
ANGER, HUH?
WELL, I'VE GOT PLENTY OF THAT.
[ ELECTRICITY CRACKLES ]
>> AAH!
>> Benson: HEY, STEVE!
THINK FAST!
>> HUMAN SHIELD NUMBER 1, GET
INTO POSITION!
>> YES, SIR!
OHH!
>> HUMAN SHIELD NUMBER 2, YOU
ARE NOW HUMAN SHIELD NUMBER 1.
>> YES, SIR!
[ DIALING ]
DEBRA?
GUESS WHO JUST GOT THAT
PROMOTION!
OHH!
>> ARTILLERY, ATTACK!
[ PROJECTILE WHISTLING ]
>> Muscle Man: [ GRUNTING ]
>> Mordecai: DID YOU GUYS KNOW
BENSON COULD FIGHT LIKE THIS?
>> Rigby: I WASN'T EVEN SURE
BENSON HAD A PULSE.
>> AIR ATTACK!
[ BLADES WHIRRING ]
>> Benson: HYAH!
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]
AAH!
>> Rigby: BENSON, YOU RULE!
>> Mordecai: YEAH, BENSON!
>> LET'S SEE YOU DODGE THIS!
[ WEAPON BEEPING ]
>> Benson: [ BREATHES DEEPLY ]
[ GRUNTING ]
>> AAH!
>> RETREAT!
[ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ]
>> GET BACK HERE!
YOUR CONTRACTS STIPULATE THAT
YOU FIGHT TO THE DEATH!
>> Benson: IS THAT ALL OF THEM?
>> NOT ALL. WHERE'S STEVE?
[ PROJECTILE WHISTLING ]
>> Benson: [ GROANS ]
>> [ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
IF I CAN'T HAVE THAT SUIT, NO
ONE CAN!
[ PROJECTILE WHISTLING ]
>> All: [ GASP ]
>> [ LAUGHS ] YES!
>> Benson: THAT ALL YOU GOT?
>> RAAAAGHH!
>> Benson: AAH!
>> Together: BENSON!
>> [ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
EAT THAT!
WHAT THE...
NO.
STAY DEAD!
>> Benson: "TANKS," BUT...
>> WAIT.
>> Benson: ...NO "TANKS."
>> AAAAAH!
>> Benson: [ LAUGHS ]
WE DID IT. WE'RE...ALIVE!
>> Together: BENSON!
[ CLICKS ]
>> Benson: ARE YOU SURE ABOUT
THIS?
>> YES. AS LONG AS I EXIST,
THERE WILL BE POWER-HUNGRY MEN
WILLING TO KILL TO WEAR ME.
>> Benson: [ SIGHS ]
>> YOU KNOW WHAT YOU MUST DO.
[ WHIRRING ]
>> Benson: I'LL MISS YOU, SUIT.
I'LL NEVER BE RESPECTED THE WAY
I WAS WHEN WE WERE A TEAM.
>> YOU DIDN'T NEED ME TO EARN
RESPECT, BENSON -- ALL YOU
NEEDED TO LEARN WAS TO TAKE
CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE AND RESPECT
YOURSELF.
>> Benson: SO, IT REALLY WAS ME
DOING ALL THE FIGHTING?
>> NO, THAT WAS PRETTY MUCH ALL
ME.
YOU DON'T HAVE TO TELL MORDECAI
AND RIGBY, THOUGH.
>> Benson: I WON'T.
SO, WHAT NOW?
>> YOU'LL HAVE TO LOWER ME SINCE
I CAN'T DEACTIVATE MYSELF.
BUT, ALSO, I CAN'T REALLY REACH
THE ROPE.
>> Benson: [ SNIFFLES ]
>> TIME TO GET REALLY CLEAN.
[ SOMBER MUSIC PLAYS ]
>> Benson: GOODBYE, SUIT.
[ BEEPING ]
>> GOODBYE, BENSON.