>> Rigby: AND THEN I'LL LIVE IN
A MANSION UP ON A MOUNTAIN WITH
FAST INTERNET.
>> Mordecai: HOW FAST?
>> Rigby: FASTER -- THAN YOU!
>> Mordecai: WHOA!
WATCH IT!
>> C.J.: BEEP, BEEP!
YO, MY HORN IS BROKEN!
LET'S GO!
BEEP!
>> Mordecai: OH, C.J.'s HERE
EARLY.
HEY, CAN YOU COVER FOR ME SO WE
CAN GO HANG OUT?
>> Rigby: SURE, MAN!
>> Mordecai: COOL!
>> Rigby: DOUBLE FISTED!
>> Mordecai: STAB, STAB, STAB!
>> Rigby: STAB, STAB, AND STAB!
>> Mordecai: STAB, STAB, STAB,
STAB, STAB!
OH, HEY, MAN, SORRY ABOUT THIS.
I'M TAKING C.J. TO SEE THAT
SWEDISH MOVIE WITH THE CRYING,
SOOO...
>> Rigby: OH, OKAY.
WELL, HAVE FUN.
>> Mordecai: I PROBABLY WON'T.
IT'S PRETTY CEREBRAL AND REALLY
SA-A-A-D!
>> Rigby: STAB! STAB!
>> Mordecai: HEY, UH, SORRY,
BUT...
>> Rigby: YEAH, YEAH, I GOT IT.
>> Mordecai: GREAT!
>> Rigby: WIPE! WIPE! WIPE!
>> Benson: SO, IF ANYONE HAS ANY
LEADS ON THIS ISSUE, THERE IS A
$12 REWARD.
OH, MAYBE MORDECAI HAS SOME
INSIGHT ON WHO'S BEEN WRAPPING
THE PUBLIC TOILET SEATS WITH
PLASTIC WRAP!
>> Mordecai: SORRY I'M LATE.
I WAS MOVING C.J.'s COUCH.
>> Muscle Man: OH, HO-HO!
I GUESS C.J.'s THE REMOTE IN
THAT RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE SHE'S
THE ONE WITH ALL THE CONTROL!
DOES ANYONE WANT ME TO EXPLAIN?
DO WE GET IT?
>> Benson: WE GET IT.
>> Pops: I'M AFRAID I DON'T
QUITE --
>> Benson: WE GET IT!
IT'S A GOOD THING YOU'RE HERE.
I'M GONNA NEED YOU TO HELP RIGBY
CHANGE THE LIGHT BULBS.
>> Rigby: OH, I CAN DO THAT
MYSELF.
>> Benson:
YEAH, SURE YOU CAN.
>> Rigby: YEAH, I CAN!
I HELP ALL THE TIME!
WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING?!
>> Muscle Man: BRO, WITHOUT
MORDECAI, YOU'D BE TOTALLY
USELESS!
>> Rigby: WHA?
COME ON, MORDECAI, TELL 'EM HOW
USEFUL I AM.
>> Mordecai: UH...
YEAH, I MEAN, YOU'RE FUN.
>> Rigby: WHAT?
NO! TELL 'EM I'M USEFUL!
>> Mordecai: YEAH.
YOU'RE MY FRIEND.
>> Rigby: WHY AREN'T YOU SAYING
THE WORD "USEFUL"?!
>> Mordecai: WELL, I MEAN, THERE
WAS THE TIME WITH THE CHAIRS,
THE LIMOUSINE, THE PRETZEL.
YOU'RE BASICALLY THE OPPOSITE OF
USEFUL PRETTY MUCH ANYTIME WE DO
ANYTHING.
>> Rigby: BUT WE DID THOSE
THINGS TOGETHER!
>> Mordecai: YEAH, I MEAN, YOU
WERE THERE.
>> Rigby: SO THE WHOLE TIME I'VE
BEEN COVERING FOR YOU AND C.J.?
>> Mordecai: WELL, I MEAN, IT'S
THE LEAST YOU COULD DO.
>> Rigby: THE LEAST...I COULD...
I QUIT.
>> Mordecai: WHAT?
>> Rigby: I QUIT!
I CAN GET A PAYCHECK ANYWHERE!
>> Mordecai: DUDE, YOU CAN'T GET
A JOB WITHOUT ME.
IT'S MY REFERENCES THAT GOT YOU
THIS JOB IN THE FIRST PLACE.
>> Rigby: REFERENCE THIS!
I'M GONNA GO OUT AND GET A JOB,
AND I'M GONNA MAKE MONEY AT THAT
JOB, AND THAT MONEY'S GONNA COME
IN THE FORM OF A CHECK, AND THAT
CHECK'S GONNA BE IN AN ENVELOPE,
AND THE ENVELOPE'S GONNA BE
SEALED, AND I'M GONNA RUB THAT
SEALED ENVELOPE ALL UP IN YOUR
FACE, MORDECAI!
PUH-EACE!
DO YOU HAVE ANY OPENINGS FOR
SOMEBODY WHO WANTS TO RUB
SOMETHING IN HIS FRIEND'S FACE?
>> OH, SURE.
WE HAVE A VARIETY OF POSITIONS
FOR ANYONE WITH A COLLEGE
DIPLOMA.
>> Rigby: I NEVER WENT TO
COLLEGE.
>> WELL, THERE ARE STILL SOME
FOR HIGH-SCHOOL GRADUATES.
>> Rigby: I NEVER GRADUATED HIGH
SCHOOL.
>> OH.
WELL, AS LONG AS YOU HAVE A
DRIVER'S LICENSE...
WELL, THERE IS THIS ONE...
>> Rigby: AS LONG AS I GET A
PAYCHECK, I'M DOING IT!
>> ALL RIGHT.
>> Rigby: HMM.
>> THE NAME'S MANNY.
THIS HERE'S MY MOVING COMPANY.
I BUILT IT FROM THE BACK UP.
WE GOT EVERYTHING YOU NEED
HERE -- CARDBOARD BOXES, PACKING
PEANUTS, PACKING TAPE.
HEY, TURN AROUND.
>> Rigby: WHAT?
>> HMM.
WELL, YOU ONLY HAVE ONE BUTT
CHEEK, AND YOU DON'T HAVE MUCH
OF A BACK ON YOU, BUT WE NEED AS
MANY BACKS AS WE CAN GET FOR
THIS NEXT JOB.
>> Rigby: O-KAY.
SO, WHAT SHOULD I DO?
>> JUST LOAD UP ON THE BACK OF
THAT TRUCK WITH THE OTHER
FLUNKIES.
ALL RIGHT, YOU CRUMB BUMS, WE
GOT A SEVEN-BEDROOM DOGHOUSE WE
GOT TO MOVE IN AN HOUR!
NOW, I DON'T WANT TO HEAR
ANYMORE BACK TALK OUT OF YOU
BACK BLISTERS, OR YOU'RE BACK ON
THE STREET!
NOW, KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK.
I RESPECT THE HECK OUT OF YA!
WHOA, THERE NEW BACK!
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!
YOU GOT TO LIFT WITH YOUR BACK!
>> Rigby: WHAT? REALLY?
>> WE'RE CALLED
"LIFT WITH YOUR BACK" FOR A
REASON!
WHAT, ARE YOU TRYING TO RUIN MY
BRAND?!
LET ME SHOW YOU HOW IT'S DONE,
KID.
>> Rigby: EW!
>> Rigby: UH...
>> YOU WANT THAT PAYCHECK -- YOU
LIFT WITH YOUR BACK!
>> Rigby: UH...
>> COME ON, WHAT ARE YOU DOING,
KID?!
DON'T USE THE FRONT DOOR!
USE THE BACK DOOR!
>> Rigby: BUT THAT'S TWICE AS
FAR!
>> WHAT, ARE YOU TRYING TO RUIN
MY BRAND?!
GET BACK THERE!
>> Rigby:
HMM, THE KID'S GOT HEART.
>> Rigby:
>> Mordecai: OH, THERE YOU ARE.
I KNEW YOU WERE FAKING EARLIER.
>> Rigby: FAKING?! HA!
DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE BACK OF
A FAKER?
>> Mordecai: LOOK, I NEED YOU TO
COVER FOR ME AGAIN.
C.J.'s HALF BIRTHDAY IS
TOMORROW, AND IT'S PRETTY
IMPORTANT.
>> Rigby: WHAT?!
ARE YOU SERIOUS?!
>> Mordecai: YEAH, COME ON, MAN!
YOU'VE SLACKED OFF YOUR WHOLE
LIFE.
CAN'T I JUST HAVE THIS?
>> Rigby: NO, YOU HAVE THINGS
ALL THE TIME -- PLAYER ONE, THE
BED, PUNCHIES, A DIPLOMA, A
GIRLFRIEND!
>> Mordecai: OH, GEEZ, IS THAT
WHAT THIS IS ABOUT -- YOU NOT
LIKING C.J.?
>> Rigby: NO, C.J. IS COOL, BUT
I HELP YOU ALL THE TIME WITH
HER, AND I HELPED YOU GET WITH
AND OVER, MARGARET, AND YOU
NEVER EVEN THANKED ME!
>> Mordecai: OF COURSE I DID!
I THINK I DID.
>> Rigby: FOUR DAYS, MORDECAI.
FOUR DAYS TILL I RUB THAT
PAYCHECK ALL UP IN YOUR SORRY
FACE!
>> Benson: OH, UH, RIGBY,
YOU'RE...STILL HERE.
AS YOU KNOW, ROOM AND BOARD IS
FOR EMPLOYEES ONLY, AND WE KIND
OF NEED THE SPACE FOR THIS OLD
DOT MATRIX PRINTER.
>> Rigby: FINE!
MAYBE I'LL STAY AT A
FOUR-STAR HOTEL WITH A POOL!
>> Benson: OH, WITH THE PAYCHECK
YOU EARNED IN A SEALED ENVELOPE?
>> Rigby: YES, IN A SEALED
ENVELOPE!
FOUR MORE DAYS.
>> YOUR BACK!
YOU GOT TO USE YOUR BACK!
>> Rigby: AGH, MY BACK!
>> Eileen: HOW WAS DAY TWO?
>> Rigby: UGH, ALL THIS
BACK-BREAKING LABOR IS KILLING
MY BACK.
I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN LIFT WITH
MY BACK ALL WEEK.
MAYBE I SHOULD JUST TAKE MY OLD
JOB BACK.
>> Eileen: WHY DO YOU KEEP
SAYING "BACK"?
>> Rigby: IT'S ALL I HEAR ALL
DAY!
>> Eileen: I DON'T MEAN TO SOUND
HARSH, BUT THIS SEEMS LIKE A
TOXIC WORK ENVIRONMENT, AND YOUR
BACK'S ALL MANGLED AND ROPEY.
>> Rigby: THANKS.
OW!
>> Eileen: QUIT SQUIRMING.
DOESN'T YOUR BOSS KNOW TO LIFT
WITH YOUR LEGS?
THAT'S -- THAT'S, LIKE, HAULING
AND PACKING 101.
>> Rigby: YEAH, I DON'T KNOW
WHAT HIS DEAL IS, BUT HE KEEPS
SAYING I'VE GOT HEART OR
SOMETHING.
>> Eileen: THEN THAT'S THE ONE
THING UPON WHICH WE AGREE.
YOU'VE GOT HEART, RIGBY, AND IN
THREE DAYS, YOU'LL HAVE A
PAYCHECK, TOO.
>> Rigby: CAN I GET A CUP OF
COFFEE?
>> Eileen: YOU GOT $1.50?
>> NOW, TODAY'S GONNA BE A BIG
DAY, AND SOME OF YOU SCHNOOKS
ARE LOOKING A LITTLE
BACK-BOTTOMED, SO I'M GONNA PLAY
THE COMPANY SONG TO GET YOUR
BACKS ON TRACK!
ALL RIGHT, YOU PICKLE POUCHES,
TIME FOR YOUR BACK PAY!
JOE!
MURRAY!
RORSCHACH!
RIGBY! AH!
>> Rigby: HEY, WHAT THE HECK,
MAN?!
I'VE BEEN DOING YOUR LAME BACK
STUFF ALL WEEK!
NOW PAY UP!
>> OH, YOU'LL GET YOUR PAYCHECK.
>> Rigby: HEY, WHAT GIVES?!
>> TELL HIM, MURRAY.
>> HELLO, RIGBY.
>> Rigby: MURRAY.
>> IT'S KIND OF COMPANY
TRADITION THAT ON YOUR FIRST
PAYCHECK, YOU GOT TO MOVE A FULL
TRUCK BY YOURSELF.
>> Rigby: WHAT?!
ARE YOU SERIOUS?!
>> HEY, MY BACK IS TIED.
YOU WANT THE PAYCHECK, YOU MOVE
THE BOXES!
>> Rigby:
UGH!
EILEEN, WHY'D YOU BRING THAT GUY
HERE?
>> Eileen: 'CAUSE YOU GUYS ARE
FRIENDS, AND YOU ALWAYS SUPPORT
EACH OTHER.
>> Mordecai: DUDE, COME ON, YOU
DON'T HAVE TO GO THROUGH ALL
THIS TO PROVE A POINT.
YOU GOT TO STOP, MAN.
LET ME HELP.
>> Rigby: NO, I'M DOING IT
MYSELF!
>> Mordecai: YOU'RE JUST GONNA
HURT YOUR BACK, DUDE!
>> Rigby: CAN'T BE WORSE THAN
WHEN YOU STABBED IT!
>> Mordecai: WHAT? COME ON!
>> Rigby: YOU THINK THE ONLY
THING I'M USEFUL FOR IS BEING
YOUR CHUMP!
"RIGBY, HELP ME GET A
GIRLFRIEND!
LET ME BORROW YOUR TIME MACHINE,
RIGBY!
RIGBY, I FOUND A DUMB SWEATER,
AND I GOT TO RETURN IT!"
ALL YOU DO IS USE ME, MAN.
>> Mordecai: BUT I NEVER ASKED
YOU TO DO THOSE THINGS!
>> Rigby: OF COURSE YOU DIDN'T!
I HELPED 'CAUSE YOU'RE MY
FRIEND.
>> Mordecai: THEN LET ME HELP
YOU.
>> Rigby: NO, THIS IS MY JOB,
AND I GOT TO UNLOAD THIS TRUCK!
>> Rigby:
AAH!
>> YOU GOT TO STOP THIS, BOSS!
YOU'RE KILLING HIM!
>> HE'S MAKING ME PROUD OUT
THERE!
I LOVE THAT KID LIKE HE WAS MY
OWN FLESH AND BACK!
>> Mordecai: RIGBY, STOP!
YOU'RE NEVER GONNA WALK AGAIN!
>> Rigby:
>> Eileen: RIGBY, ENOUGH OF
THIS!
I KNOW YOU'RE USEFUL!
NOW LIFT WITH YOUR BACK SO YOU
CAN GET THAT PAYCHECK!
>> Rigby:
>> All: YEAH, YEAH,
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH,
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH!
>> Eileen: YOU DID IT, RIGBY!
>> Rigby:
>> RIGBY, YOU'RE THE WORST
WORKER I'VE EVER HAD, AND YOU'RE
LIKE A SON TO ME!
>> Rigby: I...
QUIT.
I'M GOING BACK TO MY REAL JOB.
>> YOU'LL...
YOU'LL BE BACK!
>> Mordecai: THAT WAS SO
AWESOME, DUDE!
YOU WERE ALL LIKE, "WAH!
PSSH!"
>> Rigby: YEAH, BUT -- BUT DID
YOU SEE WHEN I WAS LIKE,
"HYAH!
>> Mordecai:
>> Rigby:
AAH!
>> Mordecai: BUT SERIOUSLY,
DUDE, I WAS TAKING YOU FOR
GRANTED.
THANKS FOR HELPING ME ALL THE
TIME.
>> Eileen: SO, THE CONFLICT'S
BEEN MEDIATED?
>> Rigby: I JUST GOT TO DO ONE
MORE THING.
>> Mordecai: WHAT'S THAT?
>> Rigby:
IN YOUR FA...
FA...
>> Mordecai: DO YOU NEED SOME
HELP, DUDE?
>> HA HA HA, OKAY!
LET ME GET A HONK-HONK IN HERE
'CAUSE YOU GOOSED IT!
IT'S TIME TO ANNOUNCE THE WINNER
OF THE CITY COLLEGE MODERN DANCE
COMPETITION!
NOW I DON'T WANT TO PIGEONHOLE
ANYONE BUT FIRST PRIZE TODAY
GOES TO...
EILEEN ROBERTS, WITH THE DANCE
"CHEWED GUM"!
>> AAH!
>> TO SAY YOU BLEW AWAY THE
COMPETITION WOULDN'T BE
OS-TRICH!
>> Eileen: AAH!
>> LET'S SEE HOW WELL YOU DANCE
AFTER A YEAR OF SITTING IN FRONT
OF YOUR VERY OWN FLAT-SCREEN
TV!
>> Eileen: AAAAH!
THIS IS THE BEST THING THAT'S
EVER HAPPENED TO ME!
>> Together: EILEEN FLAT SCREEN!
EILEEN FLAT SCREEN!
>> THANKS FOR COMING, EVERYONE!
AND TO ALL YOU LOSERS TODAY --
DON'T ROOSTER ON YOUR LAURELS
'CAUSE THERE'S ALWAYS NEXT YEAR!
>> C.J.: EILEEN, THAT WAS
AWESOME!
>> Mordecai: YEAH, I KNEW YOU
WERE GONNA WIN AS SOON AS YOU
CAME OUT OF THAT GIANT GUM
WRAPPER.
>> Rigby: NICE WORK, I-LOIN!
>> Eileen:
THANKS, GUYS!
WA-AAH!
I WAS NEVER INTO TV BEFORE BUT
THAT WAS JUST 'CAUSE I DIDN'T
HAVE THE RIGHT EQUIPMENT.
I WISH I COULD GO WATCH IT RIGHT
NOW BUT I'VE GOT TO GET TO WORK!
>> Rigby: DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT,
EILEEN.
I'LL DROP IT OFF AT YOUR PLACE
FOR YOU.
>> Eileen: REALLY?
>> Rigby: YEAH, OF COURSE.
>> Eileen: WOW, THANKS, RIGBY.
I'VE GOT TO RUN.
SEE YOU GUYS LATER!
>> Mordecai: LATER.
>> C.J.: BYE.
>> Rigby: GIVE ME A HAND WITH
THIS, WILL YOU, MORDECAI?
>> Mordecai: THAT WAS REALLY
NICE OF YOU TO OFFER TO HELP
EILEEN.
>> Rigby: WELL, I'M NOT ACTUALLY
GONNA DROP IT OFF.
>> Mordecai: WHAT? RIGBY!
EILEEN WORKED HARD FOR THIS.
YOU CAN'T JUST --
>> Rigby: NO, I'M NOT JUST GONNA
DROP IT OFF.
I'M GONNA INSTALL IT FOR HER!
TO SURPRISE HER WHEN SHE GETS
HOME FROM WORK.
>> C.J.: YOU ARE?
>> Rigby: WE CAN WATCH SOME
FLAT SCREEN, MAYBE GET SOME
PIZZA.
IT'LL BE AWESOME!
>> C.J.: THAT WILL BE AWESOME.
>> Mordecai: THAT MIGHT BE THE
NICEST THING YOU'VE EVER DONE.
>> Rigby: LIKE YOU SAID,
SHE WORKED HARD FOR THIS.
BE CAREFUL, MORDECAI, THERE'S A
STEP BEHIND YOU.
>> Mordecai: OKAY, THAT'S
ENOUGH, DUDE.
YOU'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
>> Rigby: HANG ON.
LET ME GET THE KEY.
>> Mordecai: YOU KNOW WHERE
EILEEN KEEPS HER HOUSE KEY?
>> Rigby: YEAH, I WATER HER
PLANTS SOMETIMES WHEN SHE GOES
OUT OF TOWN FOR A DANCE
INVITATIONAL OR WHATEVER.
>> C.J.: WAIT, I THOUGHT
EILEEN DIDN'T HAVE A TV?
>> Rigby: OH. YEAH.
THAT'S JOANNE'S.
>> Mordecai: WHO'S JOANNE?
>> Rigby: EILEEN'S NEW ROOMMATE.
SHE'S THIS BEAST WHO LEAVES ALL
HER JUNK EVERYWHERE AND USES
EILEEN'S HAND TOWELS TO DRY HER
BUTT.
>> C.J.: IS THIS HER?
>> Rigby: UGH, YEAH!
THAT'S HER ALL RIGHT.
WHAT A DONKEY.
YOU KNOW SHE ATE AN ENTIRE THING
OF EILEEN'S PEANUT BUTTER BUT
SHE WON'T EVEN LET HER NEAR THE
TV.
ONE TIME WE WERE JUST HANGIN'
OUT...
IT'S STARTING!
THE CARTER AND BRIGGS REUNION
SPECIAL!
>> Eileen: WAIT, RIGBY, DON'T!
NOT HERE.
>> Rigby: BUT THERE'S A TV
SITTING IN FRONT OF US AND A
CARTER AND BRIGGS SPECIAL GOING
ON INSIDE IT!
>> Eileen: UH...OHH!
>> Rigby: EILEEN, COME ON!
THROW A RIG A BONE!
>> Eileen: OKAY.
I GUESS SINCE JOANNE'S OUT OF
TOWN IT'LL BE ALL RIGHT.
>> I KNEW IT!
>> Eileen: JOANNE!
I THOUGHT YOU WERE AT THE BEACH!
>> I WAS AT THE BEACH, UNTIL I
REALIZED SOMETHING LIKE THIS
MIGHT HAPPEN!
HOW COULD I ENJOY THE SURF AND
SUN KNOWING YOU COULD BE HERE,
MESSING WITH MY TV!
>> Eileen: I'M SORRY!
I DIDN'T THINK IT --
>> NEXT TIME, THAT REMOTE WILL
BE YOUR FACE.
TO CLARIFY, NEXT TIME I'LL SLAP
YOUR FACE.
>> Rigby: I DIDN'T EVEN MAKE
THAT UP.
THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED.
>> C.J.: OKAY, SO, I GUESS WE
SHOULDN'T TOUCH ANY OF JOANNE'S
STUFF.
>> Rigby: YEAH, I THINK IF WE
JUST PUT THE FLAT SCREEN ON THE
WALL OVER HERE IT'LL BE COOL.
>> Mordecai: I CAN'T BELIEVE
SHE STILL HAS ONE OF THESE JUNKY
OLD HANATRONICS.
THIS MUST BE FIRST GENERATION
IT'S SO OLD.
>> Rigby: I TOLD YOU, SHE'S A
BEAST.
HER TV'S PROBABLY TOO SCARED TO
DIE ON HER.
LET ME JUST GRAB MY TOOLS SO WE
CAN GET MOUNTING.
>> C.J.: WOW, RIGBY THOSE
ALMOST LOOK REAL.
>> Mordecai: PFFF!
AND WHAT'S UP WITH THAT WHIP?
>> Rigby: IT'S MY UTILITY WHIP!
IT HAS A THOUSAND USES!
EILEEN AND I GOT IT AT A
RENAISSANCE FAIRE.
>> Mordecai: WHEN DID YOU GO
TO A REN FAIRE?
AND WHY ARE YOU TWO ALWAYS
HANGING OUT WITHOUT ME?
>> Rigby: YOU AND C.J. ARE
ALWAYS TOGETHER, DOIN' YOUR
THING.
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO,
HANG OUT BY MYSELF?
>> C.J.: HEY, HEY, COOL IT.
RIGBY, SHOW US YOUR WHIPPIN'
SKILLS.
>> Mordecai:
YEAH, RIGBY. WHIP IT OUT.
>> Rigby: "WHIP" PLEASURE.
WHA-CHA!
UHH...LET'S FOCUS ON PUTTING UP
THAT FLAT SCREEN.
>> All: EILEEN FLAT SCREEN!
>> Rigby: NOW TO PLUG IT IN AND
TRY IT OUT.
UGH!
JOANNE'S GIANT PLUG IS PLUGGING
UP THE WHOLE PLUG!
>> C.J.: JUST MOVE IT DOWN TO
THE BOTTOM.
THEY'LL BOTH FIT.
>> I'LL SLAP YOUR FACE!
>> Rigby: ISN'T THERE ANOTHER
OUTLET IN HERE?
>> Mordecai: THIS ONE LOOKS
KIND OF FULL.
>> Rigby: ALL RIGHT, WHATEVER!
I'M NOT GONNA BE THREATENED BY
SOME SOCKET HOG!
AND THAT'S THAT.
>> WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
>> Rigby: AAH! JOANNE!
>> DID YOU TOUCH MY TV?
>> Rigby: NO.
>> YOU BETTER NOT, BECAUSE THE
HAND THAT TOUCHES MY TV IS A
HAND YOU'LL NEVER GET BACK.
AND BY THAT I MEAN I'M RIPPING
IT OFF YOUR BODY AND KEEPING IT.
>> Rigby: LOOK, JOANNE, I
DIDN'T --
>> WHAT'S THAT?
>> Rigby: WHAT'S WHAT?
>> MOVE IT, SHRIMP.
>> Rigby: NO! WAIT!
>> I KNEW IT!
YOU MESS WITH MY TV, I MESS WITH
YOURS!
>> Rigby: NO, NOT THE FLAT
SCREEN!
>> Mordecai: JOANNE, STOP!
WE CAN TALK THIS OUT!
SHE'S ALREADY HALF WAY UP THE
STREET!
GET OUT.
>> IS EVERYTHING ALL RIGHT?
>> I SAID GET OUT!
>> AAH!
DON'T HURT ME!
>> Mordecai: COME ON, RIGBY,
LET'S GO!
DUDE, WHY'RE YOU BRINGIN' THAT
THING?
>> Rigby: IF SHE'S GONNA MESS
WITH EILEEN'S FLAT SCREEN, WE'RE
GONNA MESS WITH HER HANATRONIC.
>> OH, JOANNE'S GONNA SLAP A
FACE TODAY!
>> C.J.: WHERE'S SHE EVEN
GOING?
>> Rigby: THERE'S NO WAY
TO KNOW.
SHE DOESN'T THINK LIKE THE REST
OF US.
JUST FOLLOW HER!
>> Mordecai: LOOK OUT!
>> All: AAH!
>> C.J.: NICE TRY.
>> Rigby: TEETH! TEETH!
>> Both: AAH! AAH!
>> Both:
>> C.J.: WHAT HAPPENED?
WHERE'D SHE GO?
>> Mordecai: THERE SHE IS, ON
THE BRIDGE!
>> Rigby: JOANNE! STOP!
>> I'LL TEACH YOU TO MESS WITH
OTHER PEOPLE'S STUFF!
>> Rigby: COME ON, JOANNE.
LET'S TAKE IT EASY WITH THE FLAT
SCREEN.
>> Rigby: WE WERE WRONG TO TOUCH
YOUR TV, OKAY?
HAVEN'T YOU EVER MADE A MISTAKE
BEFORE?
>> THE ONLY MISTAKE I MADE WAS
LEAVING MY TV ALONE WITH THAT
NO-RESPECT MOOCH-WAD EILEEN!
>> Rigby:
HEY, LOOK.
I KNOW YOU WOULDN'T WANT
ANYTHING TO HAPPEN TO YOUR TV,
JUST LIKE WE WOULDN'T WANT
ANYTHING TO HAPPEN TO EILEEN'S
TV.
I GET IT, JOANNE.
THIS THING HAS BEEN YOUR BEST
FRIEND SINCE YOU WERE A BABY.
IT ENTERTAINED YOU WHEN YOU WERE
BORED, IT MADE YOU LAUGH WHEN
YOU WERE SAD, AND MAYBE, JUST
MAYBE, IT HELPS YOU FORGET FOR A
MINUTE THAT YOU ARE A HIDEOUS
MONSTER.
>> Rigby: WHAT DO YOU SAY,
JOANNE?
LET'S JUST SWAP TVs AND MOVE ON,
OKAY?
NO ONE NEEDS TO GET HURT HERE.
OKAY.
>> Rigby: OKAY.
>> NOT!
>> Both: NO!
>> Rigby: EILEEN'S TV THAT SHE
WON IN A DANCE COMPETITION!
THAT WAS CLOSE.
>> C.J.: WHOA, RIGBY!
>> Mordecai: NICE WHIP ACTION!
>> UGH, WHATEVER.
JUST GIVE MY TV BACK.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
>> C.J.: SHE REALLY LIKED THAT
OLD TV, HUH?
>> OH, NO!
THE GHOST OF MY FAMILY'S
INHERITANCE LAWYER!
NOOOO!
>> SHE FAILED, SIR.
>> JOANNE! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?
>> GRANDPA HANATRONIC, I CAN
EXPLAIN!
>> Mordecai: WAIT.
IS YOUR LAST NAME "HANATRONIC?"
>> UH, YEAH, HELLO?
JOANNE HANATRONIC?
HEIR TO THE HANATRONIC
TELEVISION DYNASTY?
>> C.J.: DID YOU KNOW THAT
WAS HER NAME?
>> Rigby: I JUST THOUGHT IT
WAS A WEIRD COINCIDENCE!
>> ENOUGH!
WHY IS OUR PRICELESS FAMILY
TELEVISION SITTING AT THE BOTTOM
OF THIS RIVER?
>> IT'S STILL...GOOD?
>> YOU HAVE DISGRACED THE FAMILY
NAME.
NOW YOU MUST GIVE UP YOUR MODERN
LIFESTYLE.
AND BY THAT, I MEAN THE SHARED
RENTAL UNIT YOU INHABIT WITH
THAT COMMONER.
>> NO!
>> GET IN THE LIMO.
>> UGH!
ARE ALL MY HORSES STILL THERE?
>> THEY ARE.
>> Rigby: WAIT.
WHAT JUST HAPPENED HERE?
>> OOH! I'M GLAD YOU ASKED!
WHEN JOANNE ASKED TO LIVE ON HER
OWN AMONGST THE, SHALL WE SAY,
"LOWER CLASSES," WE ALLOWED IT,
AS LONG AS SHE CONTINUED TO
PROTECT THE FAMILY'S MOST PRIZED
HEIRLOOM.
THE ORIGINAL TELEVISION HER
FAMILY'S COMPANY PRODUCED.
IN RETROSPECT WE PROBABLY SHOULD
HAVE KEPT IT IN A SAFE.
AS A RESULT, SHE WILL NO LONGER
INHERIT THE COMPANY.
>> C.J.: WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN
TO HER?
>> SHE WILL BE PUNISHED WITH A
LIFE OF OPULENCE AND LEISURE AT
THE HANATRONIC FAMILY MANOR.
WHOOO!
SHE'LL BE FINE.
>> C.J.: NOW I GET WHY SHE
DIDN'T WANT YOU TOUCHIN' HER
STUFF.
>> Eileen: WHAT'S GOING ON?
>> Together: SURPRISE!
>> Rigby: CHECK IT OUT, EILEEN!
YOUR TV'S ALL SET UP!
DON'T WORRY 'BOUT THE INSTALLS,
IT'S READY FOR YOUR EYEBALLS!
>> Eileen: NUH-UH!
YOU GUYS DIDN'T HAVE TO GO TO SO
MUCH TROUBLE!
THANK YOU!
>> Mordecai: IT WAS ALL RIGBY'S
IDEA.
>> Eileen: REALLY?
>> Rigby: AND AS AN ADDED BONUS,
JOANNE'S NOT YOUR ROOMMATE
ANYMORE!
>> Eileen: YES!
I MEAN, UH, THAT'S COOL, TOO.
>> Rigby: CARE TO DO THE HONORS?
>> AND NOW LET'S HEAR FROM SOME
HOLIDAY SHOPPERS DOWN AT THE
MALL!
>> LINES ARE LONG.
>> IT'S TOO CROWDED AND IT
SMELLS WEIRD.
>> HEY, MOM.
LOOK! I'M ON TV.
>> Eileen: AAH! THE LOCAL NEWS!
THIS IS THE BEST SURPRISE EVER.
>> Mordecai: WELL, WE WANTED TO
ORDER A PIZZA AND HAVE IT READY
FOR YOU WHEN YOU GOT HERE, BUT
WE DIDN'T QUITE PLAN AHEAD.
>> Rigby: OR DID WE?
>> PIZZA GUY!
>> C.J.: WHOA, RIGBY.
IMPRESSIVE!
>> Mordecai: SERIOUSLY.
THIS WAS ALL REALLY COOL.
I'M PROUD OF YOU, MAN.
>> Rigby: THANKS, MORDECAI.
NOW CAN I BORROW SOME MONEY FOR
THE PIZZA GUY?
>> Mordecai: PFFF.
GUESS THINGS ARE BACK TO NORMAL.
>> Eileen: IF THIS IS NORMAL,
THEN I'M REALLY HAPPY WITH
NORMAL.
>> UH, HELLO?
>> Rigby: OH, UH, WE'LL GET
THAT.
>> C.J.: SHOULD I GRAB SOME
PLATES?
>> Eileen: I'VE GOT SOME SODA
IN THE FRIDGE!
>> CAN YOU TELL ME HOW TO GET
OUT OF HERE?
>> Margaret:
LOOKS LIKE THE USUAL HOLIDAY
CRAZINESS, PHIL.
FROM THE TWO PINES MALL, THIS IS
MARGARET SMITH REPORTING LIVE.
>> STAY WARM OUT THERE,
MARGARET.
>> Margaret: THANKS, PHIL!
IT'S GOOD TO BE BACK IN TOWN.