1 00:00:03,371 --> 00:00:04,372 - PREVIOUSLY ON AWKWARD... 2 00:00:04,372 --> 00:00:05,539 - THIS BOOK HAD A HUGE IMPACT 3 00:00:05,539 --> 00:00:06,674 ON MY JOURNEY AS A WRITER. 4 00:00:06,674 --> 00:00:08,242 MAYBE IT CAN DO THE SAME FOR YOU. 5 00:00:08,242 --> 00:00:10,010 - MATTY, THIS IS MY FRIEND BAILEY. 6 00:00:10,010 --> 00:00:11,979 - THANK YOU FOR COMING. 7 00:00:11,979 --> 00:00:13,447 PROM. - PROM. 8 00:00:13,447 --> 00:00:14,582 - I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE 9 00:00:14,582 --> 00:00:17,218 THAT YOU WERE COOL WITH ME ASKING BAILEY. 10 00:00:24,658 --> 00:00:28,096 - SO YOU WANT TO TAKE BAILEY TO PROM. 11 00:00:28,096 --> 00:00:32,133 - IS THAT OKAY? 12 00:00:32,133 --> 00:00:34,902 - IT'S AWESOME. 13 00:00:34,902 --> 00:00:36,870 FANTASTIC. SHE'S FANTASTIC. 14 00:00:36,870 --> 00:00:40,574 YOU'RE FANTASTIC. IT'S--IT'S FANTASTIC. 15 00:00:40,574 --> 00:00:42,410 SHE'S GONNA BE STOKED. - YOU THINK SO? 16 00:00:42,410 --> 00:00:46,114 - WHY WOULDN'T SHE? YOU'RE MATTY MCKIBBEN. 17 00:00:46,114 --> 00:00:48,416 AND I WAS JENNA HAMILTON, 18 00:00:48,416 --> 00:00:49,983 THE IDIOT WHO FINALLY KNEW 19 00:00:49,983 --> 00:00:51,385 SHE HAD PERMANENTLY MESSED UP 20 00:00:51,385 --> 00:00:53,721 THE BEST RELATIONSHIP SHE'D EVER HAVE. 21 00:00:53,721 --> 00:00:56,124 [door closes] 22 00:00:59,593 --> 00:01:01,662 - [laughs] WHAT DID HE SAY? 23 00:01:01,662 --> 00:01:04,365 HOW DID HE ASK? 24 00:01:04,365 --> 00:01:06,367 - HE'S TAKING SOMEONE ELSE. 25 00:01:06,367 --> 00:01:08,969 - OH. 26 00:01:08,969 --> 00:01:11,905 SWEETIE. 27 00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:16,677 - CAN I JUST BE ALONE? 28 00:01:16,677 --> 00:01:18,212 - OF COURSE. 29 00:01:18,212 --> 00:01:22,150 [sighs] 30 00:01:25,253 --> 00:01:27,155 - I WAS A FOOL TO THINK ALL THE BAD 31 00:01:27,155 --> 00:01:28,556 I HAD PUT INTO THE UNIVERSE 32 00:01:28,556 --> 00:01:31,825 COULD SO EASILY BE FORGOTTEN. 33 00:01:31,825 --> 00:01:33,227 MATTY'S REBOUND WITH DEVON 34 00:01:33,227 --> 00:01:35,863 HAD PAVED THE WAY FOR THE REAL DEAL. 35 00:01:35,863 --> 00:01:39,567 AND THE REAL DEAL WAS NOT GOING TO BE ME. 36 00:01:39,567 --> 00:01:42,270 IT WAS GOING TO BE BAILEY. 37 00:01:44,872 --> 00:01:47,975 [soft music] 38 00:01:47,975 --> 00:01:54,915 * 39 00:01:56,484 --> 00:01:58,619 - I NAIVELY THOUGHT I WAS FINALLY BACK 40 00:01:58,619 --> 00:02:01,054 ON SOLID GROUND, BUT THE SAD TRUTH 41 00:02:01,054 --> 00:02:03,857 REVEALED THAT MY FOUNDATION WAS TOO WEAK 42 00:02:03,857 --> 00:02:06,594 TO HANDLE A SIMPLE REJECTION. 43 00:02:06,594 --> 00:02:09,096 I WAS FALLING APART, UNRAVELING, 44 00:02:09,096 --> 00:02:12,200 AND THERE WAS NOTHING I COULD DO TO STOP IT. 45 00:02:12,200 --> 00:02:16,470 I HAD TO MAKE A VIRTUAL ESCAPE. 46 00:02:27,781 --> 00:02:30,218 AT THE HEIGHT OF MY DESPAIR OVER A BOY, 47 00:02:30,218 --> 00:02:33,821 I HAD STRANGELY FOUND SOLACE IN THE ARMS OF A MAN-- 48 00:02:33,821 --> 00:02:35,623 RUSSELL JONATHAN. 49 00:02:35,623 --> 00:02:37,225 HIS TALE OF SELF-DESTRUCTION 50 00:02:37,225 --> 00:02:39,627 FOLLOWED BY EVENTUAL SELF-REDEMPTION 51 00:02:39,627 --> 00:02:41,729 WAS LIKE FOOD FOR MY SOUL. 52 00:02:41,729 --> 00:02:45,065 IT WAS AS IF HE WAS SPEAKING DIRECTLY TO ME ABOUT ME, 53 00:02:45,065 --> 00:02:47,067 AND ALL I WANTED TO DO WAS CRAWL BACK 54 00:02:47,067 --> 00:02:48,502 INTO THE COMFORT OF HIS WORDS. 55 00:02:48,502 --> 00:02:50,504 SO I DID, 56 00:02:50,504 --> 00:02:54,575 BECAUSE THE BOOK HAD BECOME MY NEW OBSESSION... 57 00:02:56,677 --> 00:02:58,346 AND DISTRACTION. 58 00:02:58,346 --> 00:03:02,250 I WAS READING IT OVER, AND OVER, AND OVER AGAIN, 59 00:03:02,250 --> 00:03:03,584 USING IT AS MY EXCUSE 60 00:03:03,584 --> 00:03:07,255 TO EXCUSE MYSELF FROM LIFE. 61 00:03:09,423 --> 00:03:11,659 IT HAD BECOME MY SECURITY BLANKET, 62 00:03:11,659 --> 00:03:16,264 AND I DIDN'T WANT TO LEAVE THE SAFETY OF ITS PAGES. 63 00:03:16,264 --> 00:03:18,399 - EARTH TO JENNA. 64 00:03:18,399 --> 00:03:20,334 YOU THERE? 65 00:03:20,334 --> 00:03:22,970 - HEY, I WAS READING THAT. - UH, WE KNOW. 66 00:03:22,970 --> 00:03:24,037 BUT WHEN ARE YOU GONNA BE DONE? 67 00:03:24,037 --> 00:03:26,640 - I DON'T KNOW. LET'S FIND OUT. 68 00:03:26,640 --> 00:03:29,843 - HOW ABOUT ENGAGING IN LIFE FOR A MINUTE? 69 00:03:29,843 --> 00:03:32,813 CONVERSE WITH YOUR PARENTS, CALL YOUR FRIENDS, 70 00:03:32,813 --> 00:03:34,615 OR HELL, AT LEAST READ ANOTHER BOOK 71 00:03:34,615 --> 00:03:36,717 BY THE SAME GUY. 72 00:03:36,717 --> 00:03:39,353 - OH, MY GOD. GENIUS. 73 00:03:39,353 --> 00:03:41,622 THAT THOUGHT HADN'T EVEN CROSSED MY MIND. 74 00:03:41,622 --> 00:03:45,359 - NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED. 75 00:03:45,359 --> 00:03:46,927 - THE IDEA THAT MY NEW LOVE AFFAIR 76 00:03:46,927 --> 00:03:48,829 WITH RUSSELL JONATHAN COULD CONTINUE 77 00:03:48,829 --> 00:03:53,301 TO GROW AND EVOLVE WAS BEYOND COMPREHENSION. 78 00:03:53,301 --> 00:03:54,768 NOT ONLY WAS I ON A QUEST 79 00:03:54,768 --> 00:03:56,670 TO FIND OUT MORE ABOUT HIS WORK, 80 00:03:56,670 --> 00:03:59,673 I SUDDENLY NEEDED TO KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THE MAN, 81 00:03:59,673 --> 00:04:02,543 THE MAN WHO WAS CHANGING MY LIFE WORD BY WORD, 82 00:04:02,543 --> 00:04:04,678 THE MAN WHO JUST TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY 83 00:04:04,678 --> 00:04:07,114 SPOKE TO MY HEART, THE MAN WHO WAS MAYBE 84 00:04:07,114 --> 00:04:11,685 MY SOUL MATE AND WHO WAS-- 85 00:04:11,685 --> 00:04:15,323 MR. HART? 86 00:04:17,791 --> 00:04:18,992 I HAD BEEN ROCKED. 87 00:04:18,992 --> 00:04:20,461 THE WORLD AS I KNEW IT WAS SUDDENLY 88 00:04:20,461 --> 00:04:22,463 VERY UNSETTLED AND CONFUSED. 89 00:04:22,463 --> 00:04:24,398 MATTY WAS TAKING BAILEY TO PROM, 90 00:04:24,398 --> 00:04:26,500 AND I WAS POSSIBLY HAVING FEELINGS 91 00:04:26,500 --> 00:04:28,969 FOR MY NEWFOUND LITERARY HERO, 92 00:04:28,969 --> 00:04:31,839 RUSSELL JONATHAN, AKA MR. HART. 93 00:04:31,839 --> 00:04:33,841 COULD IT BE THAT HART'S DISGUSTING 94 00:04:33,841 --> 00:04:36,977 AND DISGRUNTLED DEMEANOR WAS JUST A FACADE 95 00:04:36,977 --> 00:04:39,112 HIDING A UNIQUELY BEAUTIFUL MAN? 96 00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:41,982 OR WAS HE JUST THE MOST BRILLIANT WRITER 97 00:04:41,982 --> 00:04:43,417 I HAD EVER READ? 98 00:04:43,417 --> 00:04:44,785 EITHER WAY, I FELT BAMBOOZLED. 99 00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:47,755 - ALL RIGHT. 100 00:04:47,755 --> 00:04:50,391 YOU LUCKY REMAINING HALF-WITS, 101 00:04:50,391 --> 00:04:52,225 WE'RE GONNA LEARN SOMETHING TODAY CALLED A "CALLBACK." 102 00:04:52,225 --> 00:04:54,528 IT'S YOUR LAST ASSIGNMENT OF THE YEAR. 103 00:04:54,528 --> 00:04:56,063 DOES ANYBODY KNOW WHAT THAT IS? 104 00:04:56,063 --> 00:04:57,765 ANYONE? 105 00:04:57,765 --> 00:04:59,400 OKAY, LET ME GIVE YOU A CLUE. 106 00:04:59,400 --> 00:05:02,202 WHAT DID I ASK YOU ON THE FIRST DAY OF CLASS? 107 00:05:05,373 --> 00:05:06,574 PEEP SHOW. 108 00:05:06,574 --> 00:05:08,008 - YOU ASKED US TO GIVE YOU PERMISSION 109 00:05:08,008 --> 00:05:09,009 TO TORTURE US. 110 00:05:09,009 --> 00:05:11,912 - YES. YES, I DID. 111 00:05:11,912 --> 00:05:12,980 AND HAVE YOU BEEN TORTURED? 112 00:05:12,980 --> 00:05:14,648 - I'VE BEEN STANDING IN THE HALL 113 00:05:14,648 --> 00:05:16,484 EVERY DAY FOR THE LAST TWO MONTHS. 114 00:05:16,484 --> 00:05:18,118 - YOU SEE? I WAS TRUE TO MY WORD. 115 00:05:18,118 --> 00:05:20,388 AND MY ONLY HOPE IS THAT ONE DAY, 116 00:05:20,388 --> 00:05:22,390 YOU'LL ALL REMEMBER TO BE TRUE TO YOURS. 117 00:05:22,390 --> 00:05:24,492 BUT THAT WASN'T THE QUESTION. 118 00:05:24,492 --> 00:05:26,894 ANYONE ELSE? - YOU ASKED IF WE WERE MORONS. 119 00:05:26,894 --> 00:05:30,398 - I DID, AND YOU ARE, BUT THAT'S NOT IT. 120 00:05:30,398 --> 00:05:32,099 - WHAT ABOUT THE TIME YOU ASKED IF WE WERE INBRED? 121 00:05:32,099 --> 00:05:35,135 - NO, THAT WAS JUST FOR YOU. 122 00:05:35,135 --> 00:05:37,438 SERIOUSLY, GUYS. IT'S NOT THAT HARD. 123 00:05:37,438 --> 00:05:40,207 MR. JENNINGS, NO INSIGHTFUL RETORT? 124 00:05:43,777 --> 00:05:47,014 - NO. 125 00:05:47,014 --> 00:05:48,649 - I HAVE IT. 126 00:05:48,649 --> 00:05:50,050 YOU ASKED WHO WE WANT TO BE. 127 00:05:50,050 --> 00:05:52,185 - AND BINGO WAS HIS NAME-O. 128 00:05:52,185 --> 00:05:54,688 VERY GOOD, SO NOW, IT'S TIME FOR ALL OF YOU 129 00:05:54,688 --> 00:05:56,990 TO REFLECT ON THE PAST YEAR 130 00:05:56,990 --> 00:05:58,325 AND WRITE ME AN OPUS 131 00:05:58,325 --> 00:06:00,928 ABOUT WHO YOU WANT TO BE. 132 00:06:00,928 --> 00:06:03,897 - [sighs] 133 00:06:03,897 --> 00:06:06,667 - DUE TOMORROW. [bell rings] 134 00:06:06,667 --> 00:06:09,302 TOMORROW. 135 00:06:09,302 --> 00:06:11,905 HEY, UH, HAMILTON. NOT SO FAST. 136 00:06:11,905 --> 00:06:13,173 WHAT WAS THAT SIGH ABOUT? 137 00:06:13,173 --> 00:06:14,475 - I-I DIDN'T SIGH. 138 00:06:14,475 --> 00:06:16,510 - OH, YOU DID. 139 00:06:16,510 --> 00:06:17,845 - OKAY, FINE. 140 00:06:17,845 --> 00:06:21,081 I SIGHED BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW WHO I WANT TO BE, 141 00:06:21,081 --> 00:06:22,916 LET ALONE WHO I AM. 142 00:06:22,916 --> 00:06:27,154 BUT I DO KNOW WHO YOU ARE, RUSS. 143 00:06:31,492 --> 00:06:33,226 I HAD STOKED THE FIRE 144 00:06:33,226 --> 00:06:35,463 AND LET MR. HART KNOW WHAT I KNEW. 145 00:06:35,463 --> 00:06:37,130 BUT WHAT I STILL DIDN'T KNOW WAS 146 00:06:37,130 --> 00:06:39,700 IF I WAS INFATUATED WITH HIM. 147 00:06:39,700 --> 00:06:43,203 I AM STRUGGLING WITH SOME STRANGE ROMANTIC FEELINGS. 148 00:06:43,203 --> 00:06:45,238 - MM. UNREQUITED LOVE. 149 00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:47,174 - I DON'T KNOW IF I WOULD CALL IT "LOVE." 150 00:06:47,174 --> 00:06:49,009 THE FEELINGS ARE POTENTIALLY IRRATIONAL 151 00:06:49,009 --> 00:06:50,778 AND REACTIONARY TOWARDS FEELING LONELY, 152 00:06:50,778 --> 00:06:51,779 NOT TO MENTION THE AGE DIFFERENCE 153 00:06:51,779 --> 00:06:52,780 IS TOTALLY SKETCH. 154 00:06:52,780 --> 00:06:53,781 - I'M PRETTY SURE I KNOW 155 00:06:53,781 --> 00:06:54,982 WHO YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. 156 00:06:54,982 --> 00:06:56,550 IT'S NOT THAT BIG OF AN AGE DIFFERENCE. 157 00:06:56,550 --> 00:06:57,918 - ARE YOU KIDDING? IT'S MASSIVE. 158 00:06:57,918 --> 00:06:59,352 - WELL, I GUESS IF WE'RE COUNTING IN CAT YEARS. 159 00:06:59,352 --> 00:07:01,755 - DID I MENTION THAT A UNION WOULD BE ILLEGAL? 160 00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:04,892 AND GROSS? - IN WHAT STATE? 161 00:07:04,892 --> 00:07:07,060 MAYBE DELAWARE. - WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? 162 00:07:07,060 --> 00:07:08,496 IT'S NOT LIKE I ACTUALLY BELIEVE 163 00:07:08,496 --> 00:07:11,565 THAT I'M IN LOVE WITH HIM OR ANYTHING. 164 00:07:11,565 --> 00:07:13,534 INSPIRED, SURE. 165 00:07:13,534 --> 00:07:15,402 BUT IS IT POSSIBLE TO LOVE SOMEONE 166 00:07:15,402 --> 00:07:16,937 WHO ENJOYS HUMILIATING YOU? 167 00:07:16,937 --> 00:07:18,806 - I'M NOT SO SURE HE ENJOYS IT, 168 00:07:18,806 --> 00:07:20,508 AND REMEMBER IT TAKES TWO TO TANGO. 169 00:07:20,508 --> 00:07:22,676 - WHAT? I-I'VE NEVER HUMILIATED HIM. 170 00:07:22,676 --> 00:07:25,078 - WE COULD DEBATE THE DETAILS ALL DAY, 171 00:07:25,078 --> 00:07:27,380 BUT THE TRUTH IS YOU SEEM REALLY PAINED 172 00:07:27,380 --> 00:07:30,083 BY THIS WHOLE SITUATION, AND FRANKLY, I GET IT, 173 00:07:30,083 --> 00:07:32,285 WITH EVERYONE TALKING ABOUT IT AND ALL. 174 00:07:32,285 --> 00:07:34,722 - EH--EVERYONE KNOWS? 175 00:07:34,722 --> 00:07:36,524 I HAVEN'T TOLD A SOUL. 176 00:07:36,524 --> 00:07:38,225 - WELL, YOUR MOM TOLD ME. - MY MOM KNOWS? 177 00:07:38,225 --> 00:07:40,528 - YEAH, AND THEN I TOLD SOME KIDS 178 00:07:40,528 --> 00:07:43,096 WHO MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE BLABBER OF THE MOUTH. 179 00:07:43,096 --> 00:07:44,431 BUT COME ON, DID YOU REALLY THINK 180 00:07:44,431 --> 00:07:45,599 HE WAS GONNA ASK YOU TO PROM 181 00:07:45,599 --> 00:07:47,735 AFTER EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED? 182 00:07:47,735 --> 00:07:50,003 - WHY WOULD MR. HART ASK ME TO PROM? 183 00:07:50,003 --> 00:07:51,705 - MR. HART? 184 00:07:51,705 --> 00:07:53,373 UGH. NO. 185 00:07:53,373 --> 00:07:55,042 I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT THAT OLD PERV. 186 00:07:55,042 --> 00:07:56,610 HE'S NOT EVEN ALLOWED AT THE PROM. 187 00:07:56,610 --> 00:07:58,211 IT'S TOO MUCH CLEAVAGE. 188 00:07:58,211 --> 00:07:59,580 - UH, THEN WHO ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 189 00:07:59,580 --> 00:08:03,350 - MATTY. I HEARD HE DISSED YOU. 190 00:08:03,350 --> 00:08:04,351 - EVERYONE'S TALKING ABOUT THAT? 191 00:08:04,351 --> 00:08:06,353 - PSH. 192 00:08:06,353 --> 00:08:07,955 NO. 193 00:08:07,955 --> 00:08:11,024 NOT EVERYONE. 194 00:08:11,024 --> 00:08:12,626 MARY AT THE FRONT DESK DIDN'T KNOW 195 00:08:12,626 --> 00:08:15,763 UNTIL I TOLD HER. 196 00:08:15,763 --> 00:08:18,231 DO YOU WANT MY ADVICE? 197 00:08:18,231 --> 00:08:19,633 REINVENT YOURSELF 198 00:08:19,633 --> 00:08:23,470 BEFORE YOU'RE THE BUTT OF EVERYONE'S JOKE. 199 00:08:23,470 --> 00:08:25,773 - SEEMED LIKE VAL HAD GONE BACK TO THE CRACK PIPE. 200 00:08:25,773 --> 00:08:28,909 THERE WAS NO WAY I WAS THE BUTT OF EVERYONE'S JOKE. 201 00:08:28,909 --> 00:08:32,145 NO ONE CARED WHAT HAPPENED WITH ME AND MATTY. 202 00:08:32,145 --> 00:08:33,881 - FINALLY, JENNA GOT A WAKE-UP CALL. 203 00:08:33,881 --> 00:08:35,415 SHE'S NOT ALL THAT. 204 00:08:35,415 --> 00:08:37,284 - MATTY DEFINITELY TRADED UP. 205 00:08:37,284 --> 00:08:40,621 BAILEY PARKER'S THE NEW AND IMPROVED VERSION OF JENNA. 206 00:08:40,621 --> 00:08:41,889 - YEAH, WHAT DID JENNA EXPECT 207 00:08:41,889 --> 00:08:45,358 AFTER BEING SO SELFISH AND INSENSITIVE? 208 00:08:45,358 --> 00:08:49,396 KARMA'S A BITCH. 209 00:08:49,396 --> 00:08:52,600 - KARMA HAD BEEN A BITCH, AND SO HAD I, 210 00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:55,168 WHICH MEANT THERE WAS NO ROOM FOR A PITY COMMITTEE. 211 00:08:55,168 --> 00:08:57,070 - I DESERVED THE BUM RAP AND THE PAIN 212 00:08:57,070 --> 00:08:58,105 THAT CAME ALONG WITH IT. 213 00:08:58,105 --> 00:08:59,807 [knocks at door] - JENNA? 214 00:08:59,807 --> 00:09:02,242 - YEAH? - WHY ARE YOU HOLING UP IN HERE? 215 00:09:02,242 --> 00:09:03,977 - JUST FEELS MORE COMFORTABLE IN THE TOILETS 216 00:09:03,977 --> 00:09:05,312 SINCE I FEEL LIKE [bleep]. 217 00:09:05,312 --> 00:09:06,614 - THE RUMOR'S NOT THAT BAD. 218 00:09:06,614 --> 00:09:07,781 I MEAN, NO ONE REALLY CARES. 219 00:09:07,781 --> 00:09:09,783 [toilet flushes] 220 00:09:09,783 --> 00:09:12,019 - OMG, THEY DO. 221 00:09:12,019 --> 00:09:15,122 EVERYONE'S BEEN ROOTING FOR JENNA TO F.O.H.F. 222 00:09:15,122 --> 00:09:18,158 - F.O.H.F? - FALL ON HER FACE. 223 00:09:18,158 --> 00:09:21,629 - EH, GOOD TRY, BUT NO. 224 00:09:21,629 --> 00:09:23,664 - DON'T LISTEN TO HER. SHE IS OLD AND OUT OF TOUCH. 225 00:09:23,664 --> 00:09:26,499 - NO, I'M OUT OF TOUCH. - IT'S MY FAULT. 226 00:09:26,499 --> 00:09:28,335 I HAD THE WRONG INTEL ON THE PROM ASK. 227 00:09:28,335 --> 00:09:29,870 WHEN JAKE SAID MATTY WAS ABOUT TO ASK SOMEONE, 228 00:09:29,870 --> 00:09:31,138 I JUST ASSUMED IT WAS YOU. 229 00:09:31,138 --> 00:09:32,339 I'M THE ONE WHO GOT YOUR HOPES UP. 230 00:09:32,339 --> 00:09:35,876 - NOT IF I WAS ALREADY LIVING IN LA-LA LAND. 231 00:09:35,876 --> 00:09:37,678 I'VE BEEN IN DENIAL. 232 00:09:37,678 --> 00:09:38,979 - PLEASE COME OUT. 233 00:09:38,979 --> 00:09:41,749 I PROMISE NO ONE WILL MENTION PROM AT OUR LUNCH TABLE. 234 00:09:41,749 --> 00:09:44,885 - PROM, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA DO ABOUT IT. 235 00:09:44,885 --> 00:09:46,954 - SORRY, FORGOT TO GIVE HER THE MEMO. 236 00:09:46,954 --> 00:09:48,856 - IT'S OKAY. SO WHAT'S THE DEAL? 237 00:09:48,856 --> 00:09:51,191 - SEX, IT'S AS IF IT'S IN THE FINE PRINT 238 00:09:51,191 --> 00:09:52,492 OF EVERY PROM TICKET, 239 00:09:52,492 --> 00:09:54,394 BUT I'M NOT READY. 240 00:09:54,394 --> 00:09:56,764 - EASY, USE A SEXCUSE. - SEXCUSE? 241 00:09:56,764 --> 00:09:58,531 - SEX EXCUSE. - FOR EXAMPLE? 242 00:09:58,531 --> 00:09:59,700 - YOU'RE TIRED. - SWEATY. 243 00:09:59,700 --> 00:10:01,001 - HAIRY. - WHICH MEANS SCARY. 244 00:10:01,001 --> 00:10:02,002 - OR JUST GO WITH THE IRREFUTABLE. 245 00:10:02,002 --> 00:10:03,003 - SOMETHING COMMONLY PRACTICED 246 00:10:03,003 --> 00:10:04,137 FROM THE BEGINNING OF TIME. 247 00:10:04,137 --> 00:10:06,840 - WHICH IS? both: YOU HAVE YOUR PERIOD. 248 00:10:06,840 --> 00:10:10,543 - OH, MAN. SUCKS TO BE YOU. 249 00:10:10,543 --> 00:10:13,413 SO ANYWAY, JENNA, ARE YOU COMING WITH US? 250 00:10:13,413 --> 00:10:14,748 - ALONE? - SURE. 251 00:10:14,748 --> 00:10:17,084 WE TOOK TAMARA FOR THE FORMAL LAST YEAR. 252 00:10:17,084 --> 00:10:18,752 WHY CAN'T WE TAKE YOU THIS YEAR? 253 00:10:18,752 --> 00:10:19,753 - THAT'S A GREAT IDEA. 254 00:10:19,753 --> 00:10:20,821 - AND REALLY NICE, 255 00:10:20,821 --> 00:10:22,489 BUT I DON'T WANNA BE IN THE WAY 256 00:10:22,489 --> 00:10:24,692 OR MAKE THINGS UNCOMFORTABLE WITH MATTY AND BAILEY. 257 00:10:24,692 --> 00:10:27,861 - YOU WON'T. THEY'RE NOT EVEN GOING. 258 00:10:27,861 --> 00:10:30,097 I THINK HE CHANGED HIS MIND. 259 00:10:30,097 --> 00:10:31,932 - AND I HAD CHANGED MY ATTITUDE. 260 00:10:31,932 --> 00:10:34,868 HOPE WAS ALIVE, AND WELL, AND STILL ON THE PREMISES. 261 00:10:38,171 --> 00:10:39,239 [bell rings] 262 00:10:39,239 --> 00:10:41,374 - WITH MATTY PLUS NONE FOR THE DANCE, 263 00:10:41,374 --> 00:10:44,077 I HAD TO FIND A WAY TO BECOME HIS PLUS ONE. 264 00:10:44,077 --> 00:10:46,680 BUT I NEEDED MORE INTEL ON HIS STATE OF MIND, 265 00:10:46,680 --> 00:10:50,617 AND TO GET IT, I NEEDED REINFORCEMENTS. 266 00:10:50,617 --> 00:10:52,119 - THAT SOUNDS COMPLICATED. 267 00:10:52,119 --> 00:10:53,854 - IT'S NOT COMPLICATED 268 00:10:53,854 --> 00:10:56,123 BECAUSE THE ONLY GUY FOR ME IS JC, 269 00:10:56,123 --> 00:10:57,557 AND I ONLY SEE HIM AT CHURCH. 270 00:10:57,557 --> 00:10:59,126 AND THERE'S NO WAY HE'S GOING TO PROM, 271 00:10:59,126 --> 00:11:01,729 SO YOU, AUSTIN, AND I SHOULD ALL GO TOGETHER. 272 00:11:01,729 --> 00:11:02,730 - WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO, 273 00:11:02,730 --> 00:11:04,097 BE A THREE-WAY FREAK SHOW 274 00:11:04,097 --> 00:11:06,734 WHERE YOU HOLD MY HIPS AS I SLOW DANCE WITH AUSTIN? 275 00:11:06,734 --> 00:11:08,168 - [gasps] OH, THAT SOUNDS FUN. 276 00:11:08,168 --> 00:11:10,203 [giggles] - NO, IT DOESN'T. 277 00:11:10,203 --> 00:11:12,072 YOU'RE GIVING ME ANXIETY WHICH I DON'T NEED 278 00:11:12,072 --> 00:11:13,073 BECAUSE I'VE GAINED THREE POUNDS, 279 00:11:13,073 --> 00:11:14,141 AND I PROMISED AUSTIN 280 00:11:14,141 --> 00:11:16,043 I WOULDN'T SCARF AND BARF ANYMORE. 281 00:11:16,043 --> 00:11:18,178 - HE KNOWS? - YES, HE KNOWS EVERYTHING. 282 00:11:18,178 --> 00:11:20,413 HIS LACK OF A SOCIAL FILTER ALSO COMES 283 00:11:20,413 --> 00:11:21,815 WITH A LACK OF JUDGMENT. 284 00:11:21,815 --> 00:11:23,183 HE JUST LIKES ME FOR ME. 285 00:11:23,183 --> 00:11:25,118 AND NOW, I'VE MOVED INTO A SPHERE 286 00:11:25,118 --> 00:11:26,219 BEYOND LIKE FOR HIM. 287 00:11:26,219 --> 00:11:30,758 LISS, I THINK I'M IN LOVE. 288 00:11:30,758 --> 00:11:32,125 - NO. - YES. 289 00:11:32,125 --> 00:11:34,294 - NO, REALLY, NOW YOU'RE FREAKING ME OUT. 290 00:11:34,294 --> 00:11:36,529 - WHY? - BECAUSE YOU'RE YOU. 291 00:11:36,529 --> 00:11:38,866 AND YOU ARE NOT A LOVER. - YES, I AM. 292 00:11:38,866 --> 00:11:40,567 - NO, YOU'RE NOT. - STOP SAYING THAT. 293 00:11:40,567 --> 00:11:43,536 - YOU STOP SAYING IT. - I LOVE AUSTIN. 294 00:11:43,536 --> 00:11:46,273 AND I AM FREAKING OUT. I EVEN HAVE BUTTERFLIES. 295 00:11:46,273 --> 00:11:48,275 AND I HATE BUTTERFLIES. 296 00:11:48,275 --> 00:11:50,143 AND IF YOU TELL ANYONE I'M HAVING THIS SOFT SIDE MOMENT, 297 00:11:50,143 --> 00:11:51,879 I SWEAR I WILL CUT YOU. 298 00:11:51,879 --> 00:11:53,814 - [sighs] YOU'RE BACK. 299 00:11:53,814 --> 00:11:57,017 THANK GOODNESS. I WAS STARTING TO WORRY. 300 00:11:58,819 --> 00:12:01,321 - AH. WHAT'S WITH THE SNEAK ATTACK? 301 00:12:01,321 --> 00:12:03,023 - OH, NO ONE'S SNEAKING. - OR ATTACKING. 302 00:12:03,023 --> 00:12:05,158 BUT WE HAVE SOME QUESTIONS. - OKAY. 303 00:12:05,158 --> 00:12:07,360 - WE SUSPECT YOU'VE WITHHELD SOME PERTINENT INFORMATION 304 00:12:07,360 --> 00:12:08,561 ABOUT MATTY AND BAILEY. 305 00:12:08,561 --> 00:12:10,630 - BABE, I JUST FOUND OUT EARLIER IN THE DAY, 306 00:12:10,630 --> 00:12:12,299 SO NOW YOU KNOW ALL THAT I KNOW. 307 00:12:12,299 --> 00:12:13,533 SO YOU DON'T NEED TO WIG OUT. 308 00:12:13,533 --> 00:12:15,568 - WE'RE NOT WIGGING, BUT RATHER WONDERING 309 00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:17,537 IF MATTY'S REASON FOR CHANGING HIS MIND 310 00:12:17,537 --> 00:12:19,539 HAD ANYTHING TO DO WITH ANOTHER GIRL. 311 00:12:19,539 --> 00:12:22,442 - I.E. JENNA. - I DON'T KNOW. 312 00:12:22,442 --> 00:12:23,676 - YOU KNOW. - NO, I DON'T. 313 00:12:23,676 --> 00:12:25,678 - THEN, I DO. JENNA, IT'S CLEAR. 314 00:12:25,678 --> 00:12:27,848 MATTY NEVER WANTED TO ASK BAILEY. 315 00:12:27,848 --> 00:12:29,182 HE WAS JUST TRYING TO SUSS OUT HOW YOU FELT 316 00:12:29,182 --> 00:12:30,517 AND SEE IF YOU STILL CARED. 317 00:12:30,517 --> 00:12:32,986 HE WAS COMPLETELY ANGLING TO GET A RISE OUT OF YOU. 318 00:12:32,986 --> 00:12:34,387 HE WAS WAITING FOR YOU TO CONTEST 319 00:12:34,387 --> 00:12:35,823 SO HE COULD SPRING THE ASK ON YOU. 320 00:12:35,823 --> 00:12:37,424 BUT YOU DIDN'T CONTEST, SO HE DIDN'T ASK. 321 00:12:37,424 --> 00:12:38,425 FOLLOWING? - YEAH. 322 00:12:38,425 --> 00:12:39,893 - NO. 323 00:12:39,893 --> 00:12:42,395 - IT'S GIRL WORLD, BABE. JUST TUNE OUT UNTIL I'M DONE. 324 00:12:42,395 --> 00:12:43,730 SO THE WHOLE THING WAS A RUSE. 325 00:12:43,730 --> 00:12:45,232 HE'S WAITING FOR YOU TO SAY SOMETHING. 326 00:12:45,232 --> 00:12:46,233 AND NOW'S YOUR SHOT. 327 00:12:46,233 --> 00:12:48,168 SAY SOMETHING AND GET THAT ASK. 328 00:12:48,168 --> 00:12:49,269 - YOU THINK THAT'S A GOOD IDEA? 329 00:12:49,269 --> 00:12:51,104 - NO. - YES. 330 00:12:51,104 --> 00:12:53,106 - IN BOY WORLD, WE DON'T THINK THAT HARD. 331 00:12:53,106 --> 00:12:54,842 - YEAH, YOU DO. - [scoffs] 332 00:12:54,842 --> 00:12:56,443 - MATTY IS THE QUIET, CONTEMPLATIVE TYPE, 333 00:12:56,443 --> 00:12:57,911 AND I FEEL EXTREMELY CONFIDENT 334 00:12:57,911 --> 00:12:59,479 HE'S WAITING FOR AN OPENING TO ASK YOU 335 00:12:59,479 --> 00:13:01,281 AND JUST YOU, SO GO. 336 00:13:01,281 --> 00:13:05,252 GET THAT ASK. 337 00:13:05,252 --> 00:13:06,253 WHAT? 338 00:13:06,253 --> 00:13:07,454 - WHY DO YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO STEAMROLL ME? 339 00:13:07,454 --> 00:13:09,256 - I DIDN'T MEAN TO. I'M SORRY. 340 00:13:09,256 --> 00:13:10,723 - YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO BE IN CONTROL OF EVERYTHING. 341 00:13:10,723 --> 00:13:13,660 - NO, I DON'T. - YEAH, YOU DO. 342 00:13:13,660 --> 00:13:15,462 - TRY ME. 343 00:13:15,462 --> 00:13:17,064 - FINE. 344 00:13:17,064 --> 00:13:20,200 I'M GONNA WEAR A COLORED TUX TO PROM. 345 00:13:21,969 --> 00:13:23,904 - [sighs] GREAT. 346 00:13:23,904 --> 00:13:25,438 WHAT COLOR? 347 00:13:25,438 --> 00:13:27,941 - IT'S A SURPRISE. 348 00:13:27,941 --> 00:13:30,210 - CAN'T WAIT TO SEE IT. - AH. 349 00:13:30,210 --> 00:13:31,711 - MM-HMM. 350 00:13:31,711 --> 00:13:34,481 - IF TAMARA'S REASONING WAS CORRECT, 351 00:13:34,481 --> 00:13:36,950 MATTY WAS WAITING FOR AN OPENING FROM ME, 352 00:13:36,950 --> 00:13:39,719 WHICH MEANT I HAD TO DO MY BEST TO GIVE HIM ONE 353 00:13:39,719 --> 00:13:42,155 AND BE AS SUBTLE AS POSSIBLE ABOUT IT. 354 00:13:42,155 --> 00:13:44,324 MATTY. HEY. 355 00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:47,127 I NEED A DATE TO PROM. ANY IDEAS? 356 00:13:47,127 --> 00:13:49,329 SO SUBTLETY WASN'T MY STRONG SUIT. 357 00:13:49,329 --> 00:13:51,899 - I WILL HAVE TO THINK IT OVER. 358 00:13:51,899 --> 00:13:53,566 - HE WAS PLAYING HARD TO GET. 359 00:13:53,566 --> 00:13:55,368 OKAY, WELL, HOW ABOUT THINKING 360 00:13:55,368 --> 00:13:57,070 ABOUT SOMEONE YOU'D WANNA SHARE A LIMO WITH 361 00:13:57,070 --> 00:13:58,605 SO WE CAN RIDE TOGETHER? 362 00:13:58,605 --> 00:14:01,441 - I'M NOT GOING. - OH, NO. 363 00:14:01,441 --> 00:14:03,443 WHY? DON'T YOU WANT TO GO? 364 00:14:03,443 --> 00:14:07,114 - I DID, BUT NOT ANYMORE. 365 00:14:07,114 --> 00:14:08,781 - HOW COME? 366 00:14:08,781 --> 00:14:10,717 - BAILEY SAID "NO." 367 00:14:10,717 --> 00:14:14,087 AND HONESTLY, THERE'S NO ONE ELSE I WANNA ASK. 368 00:14:14,087 --> 00:14:16,723 BUT I WILL PUT MY THINKING CAP ON FOR YOU, 369 00:14:16,723 --> 00:14:19,993 AND WE'LL FIND YOU A DATE. 370 00:14:22,662 --> 00:14:24,797 - SO THERE WOULD BE NO DATE, 371 00:14:24,797 --> 00:14:26,599 NO DANCE, 372 00:14:26,599 --> 00:14:29,236 JUST DEVASTATION. 373 00:14:32,205 --> 00:14:33,406 - I HAD TO WRITE MY LAST PAPER, 374 00:14:33,406 --> 00:14:35,943 BUT ALL I WANTED TO DO WAS HOLE UP AND HIDE. 375 00:14:35,943 --> 00:14:37,844 I COULDN'T WRITE ABOUT WHO I WANTED TO BE 376 00:14:37,844 --> 00:14:40,747 WHEN I FELT SO FAR AWAY FROM WHO I WAS, 377 00:14:40,747 --> 00:14:42,249 WHO I USED TO BE. 378 00:14:42,249 --> 00:14:44,284 THAT GIRL WHO USED TO BE SELFLESS 379 00:14:44,284 --> 00:14:46,786 HAD BECOME SELFISH, AND IN TURN 380 00:14:46,786 --> 00:14:49,156 WAS ALL ALONE WITHOUT A PROM DATE, 381 00:14:49,156 --> 00:14:53,193 A PERFECT BOYFRIEND, OR A GREAT NEW FRIEND, 382 00:14:53,193 --> 00:14:55,028 A FRIEND THAT I HAD OVERTLY AVOIDED 383 00:14:55,028 --> 00:14:56,663 AND IGNORED FOR THE LAST FEW DAYS, 384 00:14:56,663 --> 00:15:01,601 ASSUMING SHE WAS MATTY'S NEW GIRL. 385 00:15:01,601 --> 00:15:04,237 I SUDDENLY HAD TWO ASSIGNMENTS-- 386 00:15:04,237 --> 00:15:05,705 TO SAY SOMETHING ON THE PAGE 387 00:15:05,705 --> 00:15:07,574 AND TO BAILEY IN PERSON. 388 00:15:07,574 --> 00:15:09,609 BUT I DIDN'T KNOW HOW OR WHERE TO BEGIN, 389 00:15:09,609 --> 00:15:11,411 AND I WAS GETTING SICK OF WHINING ABOUT IT. 390 00:15:11,411 --> 00:15:14,481 SO I WAS LEFT WITH ONLY ONE LAST RESORT-- 391 00:15:14,481 --> 00:15:16,083 PROCRASTINATION. 392 00:15:16,083 --> 00:15:18,885 - STOP MAKING EXCUSES. - ABOUT WHAT? 393 00:15:18,885 --> 00:15:20,487 - ABOUT WHAT YOU WANNA DO AFTER THE PROM. 394 00:15:20,487 --> 00:15:22,389 I SENSE YOU'RE NERVOUS, AND I THINK I KNOW WHY. 395 00:15:22,389 --> 00:15:24,992 - I'M NOT NERVOUS. - YOU CAN'T LIE TO ME. 396 00:15:24,992 --> 00:15:26,226 LISTEN, I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING, 397 00:15:26,226 --> 00:15:27,727 AND I JUST WANT YOU TO BE COMFORTABLE. 398 00:15:27,727 --> 00:15:28,996 - REALLY? - YEAH. 399 00:15:28,996 --> 00:15:30,830 AND THE NIGHT COMES WITH A LOT OF PRESSURE, 400 00:15:30,830 --> 00:15:32,532 AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING 401 00:15:32,532 --> 00:15:33,900 THAT COMPROMISES WHO YOU ARE. 402 00:15:33,900 --> 00:15:36,303 - REALLY? BECAUSE I WAS GETTING WORRIED. 403 00:15:36,303 --> 00:15:37,604 - DON'T BE. - [giggles] 404 00:15:37,604 --> 00:15:40,473 - I'M TOTALLY COOL WITH YOU WEARING A PANTSUIT. 405 00:15:40,473 --> 00:15:43,043 - OH, GO--OD. 406 00:15:43,043 --> 00:15:45,212 - YEAH, YOU TOTALLY DON'T NEED TO SWEAT IT. 407 00:15:45,212 --> 00:15:46,779 I'M MAN ENOUGH TO FEEL LIKE A MAN 408 00:15:46,779 --> 00:15:48,315 NEXT TO MY WOMAN IN PANTS. 409 00:15:48,315 --> 00:15:50,317 - OKAY. 410 00:15:50,317 --> 00:15:52,019 - WE'RE GONNA HAVE A GREAT TIME, 411 00:15:52,019 --> 00:15:56,489 ESPECIALLY ONCE WE GET BACK TO OUR HOTEL ROOM. 412 00:15:56,489 --> 00:15:58,825 - BAILEY. 413 00:15:58,825 --> 00:16:01,894 HEY. both: I'M SORRY. 414 00:16:01,894 --> 00:16:03,596 - WHY ARE YOU SORRY? 415 00:16:03,596 --> 00:16:05,732 - I THOUGHT YOU WOULD NEVER TALK TO ME AGAIN. 416 00:16:05,732 --> 00:16:07,034 AFTER I HEARD ALL THOSE RUMORS 417 00:16:07,034 --> 00:16:10,237 ABOUT YOU, AND MATTY, AND ME, 418 00:16:10,237 --> 00:16:13,140 I WAS DEVASTATED. 419 00:16:13,140 --> 00:16:14,341 I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW 420 00:16:14,341 --> 00:16:17,477 THAT AFTER MATTY ASKED ME TO THE PROM, 421 00:16:17,477 --> 00:16:19,812 I CALLED YOU TO MAKE SURE 422 00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:23,850 YOU HEARD IT FROM ME FIRST. 423 00:16:28,588 --> 00:16:30,957 - I ALREADY KNEW. - YOU KNEW? 424 00:16:30,957 --> 00:16:33,493 - MATTY TOLD ME, AND I JUST ASSUMED YOU SAID "YES," 425 00:16:33,493 --> 00:16:35,962 WHICH IS WHY I AVOIDED YOUR CALLS. 426 00:16:35,962 --> 00:16:37,464 I WAS A LAME FRIEND FOR NOT GIVING YOU 427 00:16:37,464 --> 00:16:38,465 THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT. 428 00:16:38,465 --> 00:16:40,467 - NO, I WAS THE LAME FRIEND 429 00:16:40,467 --> 00:16:42,102 WHO APPARENTLY GAVE THE WRONG SIGNAL 430 00:16:42,102 --> 00:16:43,303 TO YOUR EX-BOYFRIEND. 431 00:16:43,303 --> 00:16:44,937 BUT I SAID "NO" RIGHT AWAY. 432 00:16:44,937 --> 00:16:47,340 THERE WAS NEVER EVEN A MOMENT WHERE I OFFERED TO GO. 433 00:16:47,340 --> 00:16:50,643 - SO YOU DON'T LIKE MATTY? - I DO. 434 00:16:50,643 --> 00:16:53,813 HE'S A GREAT GUY, BUT... 435 00:16:53,813 --> 00:16:54,814 [sniffles] 436 00:16:54,814 --> 00:16:57,950 JENNA, YOU ARE MY ONLY FRIEND. 437 00:16:57,950 --> 00:17:00,820 AND I WOULD NEVER, EVER DO ANYTHING TO HURT YOU. 438 00:17:00,820 --> 00:17:04,457 - SO YOU TURNED HIM DOWN TO NOT HURT ME? 439 00:17:04,457 --> 00:17:05,725 - OF COURSE. 440 00:17:05,725 --> 00:17:07,994 - I HAD BEEN IN MY OWN PERSONAL HELL 441 00:17:07,994 --> 00:17:10,163 FOR SO LONG THAT I HAD STOPPED BELIEVING 442 00:17:10,163 --> 00:17:11,698 IN RANDOM ACTS OF KINDNESS. 443 00:17:11,698 --> 00:17:13,666 AND THERE, RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME, 444 00:17:13,666 --> 00:17:15,368 WAS THE GREATEST ACT OF KINDNESS 445 00:17:15,368 --> 00:17:17,637 I HAD SEEN IN A LONG TIME. 446 00:17:17,637 --> 00:17:20,840 AND THUS, I WAS INSPIRED TO RETURN THE FAVOR. 447 00:17:20,840 --> 00:17:22,775 - DO ME A SOLID. - SURE. 448 00:17:22,775 --> 00:17:25,945 - DRY YOUR EYES AND STAY HERE. 449 00:17:25,945 --> 00:17:27,614 EH--MM, HM. 450 00:17:27,614 --> 00:17:29,649 THREE PEOPLE DIDN'T HAVE TO FORGO THE PROM 451 00:17:29,649 --> 00:17:34,487 IF ONE PERSON COULD JUST GET OUT OF THE WAY. 452 00:17:34,487 --> 00:17:36,523 SO HERE'S THE DEAL. 453 00:17:36,523 --> 00:17:39,392 BAILEY SAID "NO" TO AVOID HURTING ME. 454 00:17:39,392 --> 00:17:40,827 WHAT SHE DOESN'T KNOW 455 00:17:40,827 --> 00:17:43,463 IS THAT YOU ASKED MY PERMISSION, AND I WAS COOL WITH IT 456 00:17:43,463 --> 00:17:44,497 BECAUSE I AM COOL. 457 00:17:44,497 --> 00:17:46,799 I REALLY WANT YOU GUYS TO GO TOGETHER. 458 00:17:46,799 --> 00:17:51,938 BAILEY, WILL YOU GO WITH MATTY? 459 00:17:51,938 --> 00:17:53,173 - THIS IS WEIRD. - AGREED. 460 00:17:53,173 --> 00:17:55,142 - AGAIN, MY FAULT. I'M MAKING IT WEIRD. 461 00:17:55,142 --> 00:17:58,378 BUT IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE IF YOU GUYS JUST GO TOGETHER. 462 00:17:58,378 --> 00:17:59,412 both: I DON'T KNOW. 463 00:17:59,412 --> 00:18:01,214 - I CAN EASILY MAKE THIS WEIRD ALL DAY, 464 00:18:01,214 --> 00:18:05,152 OR YOU CAN END THE PAIN AND JUST GO TO PROM TOGETHER. 465 00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:12,392 - I'M IN IF YOU'RE IN. 466 00:18:12,392 --> 00:18:16,229 - I'M COOL WITH IT. I SWEAR. 467 00:18:16,229 --> 00:18:18,598 - SHE'S IN. 468 00:18:18,598 --> 00:18:20,300 - I'M IN. 469 00:18:20,300 --> 00:18:23,470 THANK YOU FOR ASKING. 470 00:18:23,470 --> 00:18:26,473 BOTH OF YOU. 471 00:18:26,473 --> 00:18:30,177 NOW, GO. YOU GUYS HAVE PLANS TO MAKE. 472 00:18:33,580 --> 00:18:38,918 [slow clapping] 473 00:18:38,918 --> 00:18:40,187 - BRAVO. 474 00:18:40,187 --> 00:18:42,622 THAT WAS ONE STELLAR PERFORMANCE. 475 00:18:42,622 --> 00:18:43,823 AND I'VE GOTTA HAND IT TO YOU, 476 00:18:43,823 --> 00:18:47,460 YOU PULLED IT OFF WITH COMPLETE SINCERITY. 477 00:18:47,460 --> 00:18:49,496 - I WAS SINCERE. 478 00:18:49,496 --> 00:18:52,899 - DON'T EVEN TRY TO BULL[bleep] A BULL[bleep]ER. 479 00:18:52,899 --> 00:18:55,001 - GO AHEAD. SLAUGHTER ME. 480 00:18:55,001 --> 00:18:57,470 - I DON'T NEED TO. YOU JUST SLAUGHTERED YOURSELF. 481 00:18:57,470 --> 00:19:01,208 AND IT WAS EXCRUCIATING... 482 00:19:01,208 --> 00:19:03,075 LY AWESOME TO WATCH, 483 00:19:03,075 --> 00:19:04,877 WHICH IS WHY I BET HART'S LAST ASSIGNMENT 484 00:19:04,877 --> 00:19:06,679 WAS EASY FOR YOU TO WRITE. 485 00:19:06,679 --> 00:19:08,080 IT APPEARS WHO YOU WANNA BE 486 00:19:08,080 --> 00:19:11,751 IS ALREADY WHO YOU ARE--PATHETIC. 487 00:19:11,751 --> 00:19:14,987 YOU'RE WELCOME. 488 00:19:14,987 --> 00:19:16,223 - HA. 489 00:19:16,223 --> 00:19:18,658 THAT PAPER WASN'T EASY TO WRITE. 490 00:19:18,658 --> 00:19:21,294 BECAUSE THERE WAS NO PAPER. 491 00:19:21,294 --> 00:19:25,632 [bell rings] 492 00:19:25,632 --> 00:19:26,766 - OKAY, TIME'S UP. 493 00:19:26,766 --> 00:19:31,438 TURN IN THOSE DISASTROUS DIATRIBES, PLEASE. 494 00:19:35,742 --> 00:19:37,277 - THANKS FOR THE ASSIGNMENT. [sighs] 495 00:19:37,277 --> 00:19:38,778 I FEEL LIKE I GOT OUT SOME DEMONS. 496 00:19:38,778 --> 00:19:41,914 - SOMEHOW, I FIND THAT HARD TO BELIEVE. 497 00:19:41,914 --> 00:19:44,984 - SO SHE SPEAKS. - I DO. 498 00:19:44,984 --> 00:19:48,288 - HAVE YOU FINALLY GOTTEN PAST YOUR HATRED OF ME? 499 00:19:48,288 --> 00:19:49,856 - I DON'T HATE YOU, COLLIN. 500 00:19:49,856 --> 00:19:51,691 AND BELIEVE ME, I'VE TRIED. 501 00:19:51,691 --> 00:19:53,660 BUT THE TRUTH IS 502 00:19:53,660 --> 00:19:57,464 I CAN'T HATE SOMEONE I DON'T CARE ABOUT. 503 00:20:12,379 --> 00:20:14,581 - WELL, THAT WAS RATHER DRAMATIC. 504 00:20:14,581 --> 00:20:16,416 - SORRY. IT WAS A WASTE OF YOUR TIME. 505 00:20:16,416 --> 00:20:19,286 IT WAS GARBAGE, PHONED IN, AND WRITTEN LAST-MINUTE. 506 00:20:19,286 --> 00:20:20,920 - I HAVE EYES, I SAW YOU SCRIBBLE THAT THING 507 00:20:20,920 --> 00:20:22,722 LIKE IT WAS THE GRAND PRIX OF WRITING OVER THE LAST HOUR. 508 00:20:22,722 --> 00:20:25,792 - JUST GIVE ME A ZERO. - NO. 509 00:20:25,792 --> 00:20:27,627 - I CAN'T WRITE THE ASSIGNMENT. - THAT'S NOT ACCEPTABLE. 510 00:20:27,627 --> 00:20:29,128 - WELL, YOU'RE JUST GONNA HAVE TO ACCEPT IT. 511 00:20:29,128 --> 00:20:33,833 - MS. HAMILTON, SOMETIMES, YOU DON'T GET TO CALL THE SHOTS. 512 00:20:33,833 --> 00:20:35,268 - I AM NOT A BRILLIANT WRITER LIKE YOU. 513 00:20:35,268 --> 00:20:37,970 I CAN'T JUST WRITE POETRY IN A VACUUM. 514 00:20:37,970 --> 00:20:39,472 - I NEVER SAID I WANTED POETRY IN A VACUUM. 515 00:20:39,472 --> 00:20:40,873 I MERELY ASKED YOU TO ANSWER 516 00:20:40,873 --> 00:20:43,109 A SIMPLE QUESTION THAT I KNOW YOU CAN. 517 00:20:43,109 --> 00:20:45,545 - I CAN'T 518 00:20:45,545 --> 00:20:49,015 BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW WHO I WANT TO BE. 519 00:20:49,015 --> 00:20:51,818 I RUINED MY LIFE, ALIENATED THE PEOPLE IN IT, 520 00:20:51,818 --> 00:20:55,488 AND NOW I AM... 521 00:20:55,488 --> 00:20:58,558 - LOST? 522 00:21:02,061 --> 00:21:03,363 - LET ME TELL YOU A STORY. 523 00:21:03,363 --> 00:21:04,631 SO THERE WAS THIS GUY. 524 00:21:04,631 --> 00:21:06,333 HE WAS MAYBE A FEW YEARS OLDER THAN YOU. 525 00:21:06,333 --> 00:21:07,834 HE THOUGHT HE WAS A TOUGH GUY. 526 00:21:07,834 --> 00:21:08,835 THOUGHT HE KNEW IT ALL. 527 00:21:08,835 --> 00:21:10,770 SO HE SAT DOWN AND WROTE A STORY, 528 00:21:10,770 --> 00:21:11,938 A KILLER STORY, 529 00:21:11,938 --> 00:21:13,906 AND THE WHOLE LITERARY WORLD AGREED-- 530 00:21:13,906 --> 00:21:15,207 THIS GUY KNEW IT ALL. 531 00:21:15,207 --> 00:21:18,578 THEY EVEN CALLED HIM THE NEW SALINGER. 532 00:21:18,578 --> 00:21:20,880 SO HE BOUGHT THE BS. 533 00:21:20,880 --> 00:21:23,616 AND THEN, HE STARTED TO PISS OFF EVERYBODY THAT HE CARED ABOUT. 534 00:21:23,616 --> 00:21:25,184 HE WAS THE WRITER OF HIS OWN RUIN 535 00:21:25,184 --> 00:21:27,019 BECAUSE HE THOUGHT HE COULD DO NO WRONG 536 00:21:27,019 --> 00:21:29,055 UNTIL HE WROTE HIS SECOND NOVEL. 537 00:21:29,055 --> 00:21:32,825 AND THEN, HE WAS TORN APART, 538 00:21:32,825 --> 00:21:36,429 LAMBASTED AS A ONE-HIT WONDER. 539 00:21:36,429 --> 00:21:37,564 [laughs] 540 00:21:37,564 --> 00:21:39,432 SOME CRITICS EVEN QUESTIONED IF THE SAME GUY 541 00:21:39,432 --> 00:21:42,435 WROTE BOTH BOOKS. 542 00:21:42,435 --> 00:21:44,471 SO YOU KNOW WHAT HE DID? 543 00:21:44,471 --> 00:21:47,374 - WHAT? - HE QUIT. 544 00:21:47,374 --> 00:21:50,377 HE GAVE UP 545 00:21:50,377 --> 00:21:53,245 BECAUSE DESPITE KNOWING IT ALL, 546 00:21:53,245 --> 00:21:54,447 HE WASN'T A TOUGH GUY. 547 00:21:54,447 --> 00:21:55,448 HE EVEN CHANGED HIS NAME 548 00:21:55,448 --> 00:21:57,917 AFTER HE LET THE CRITICS DESTROY HIM. 549 00:21:57,917 --> 00:22:01,521 AND THE DAY HE DECIDED TO TAKE HIS HEAD OUT OF HIS ASS, 550 00:22:01,521 --> 00:22:05,224 HE DID THE BEST THING HE COULD. 551 00:22:05,224 --> 00:22:07,994 - BECAME A TEACHER. - YES. 552 00:22:07,994 --> 00:22:10,129 BECAUSE HE WANTED TO TEACH KIDS WITH TALENT 553 00:22:10,129 --> 00:22:12,399 HOW TO FACE CRITICISM 554 00:22:12,399 --> 00:22:15,702 AND DISCOVER THAT SUCCESS ISN'T ABOUT WINNING. 555 00:22:15,702 --> 00:22:17,437 IT'S ABOUT STAYING IN THE GAME, 556 00:22:17,437 --> 00:22:19,105 NOT QUITTING, 557 00:22:19,105 --> 00:22:22,241 OR LETTING SOMEONE MAKE YOU QUIT. 558 00:22:24,511 --> 00:22:27,246 DOES THAT MAKE SENSE? 559 00:22:27,246 --> 00:22:30,417 - SO YOU'RE NOT A [bleep]? - NO, I'M A [bleep]. 560 00:22:30,417 --> 00:22:33,252 BUT I'M A [bleep] WHO HAS A METHOD TO HIS MADNESS. 561 00:22:33,252 --> 00:22:35,187 AND I WANT YOU TO REALIZE THAT ALL THE HARDSHIP 562 00:22:35,187 --> 00:22:36,823 AND ALL THE CRITICISM THAT YOU FACE 563 00:22:36,823 --> 00:22:40,226 IS MAKING YOU A BETTER WRITER 564 00:22:40,226 --> 00:22:41,694 AND A BETTER PERSON. 565 00:22:41,694 --> 00:22:43,029 SO DON'T QUIT NOW BEFORE YOU LEARN 566 00:22:43,029 --> 00:22:44,330 THAT NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO 567 00:22:44,330 --> 00:22:47,266 OR WHERE YOU GO, 568 00:22:47,266 --> 00:22:48,635 YOU CAN'T ESCAPE YOURSELF. 569 00:22:48,635 --> 00:22:52,171 - TURNS OUT I WAS FEELING SOMETHING FOR MR. HART. 570 00:22:52,171 --> 00:22:54,206 BUT IT WASN'T LOVE. 571 00:22:54,206 --> 00:22:55,341 IT WAS RESPECT. 572 00:22:55,341 --> 00:22:59,879 - NOW TAKE THE WEEKEND, BUT TURN THAT PAPER IN. 573 00:23:03,483 --> 00:23:05,284 - DAMN, TUXES ARE A PRETTY PENNY. 574 00:23:05,284 --> 00:23:06,653 - [sighs] HOW 'BOUT RENTING TWO? 575 00:23:06,653 --> 00:23:08,120 I CAN'T BELIEVE THE GUY WOULDN'T LET ME 576 00:23:08,120 --> 00:23:10,723 EXCHANGE THE BLACK ONE FOR MY TAMARA SURPRISE. 577 00:23:10,723 --> 00:23:11,958 - WELL, NOW, YOU CAN MAKE THE MID-PROM WARDROBE CHANGE 578 00:23:11,958 --> 00:23:12,959 YOU'VE ALWAYS DREAMED OF. 579 00:23:12,959 --> 00:23:17,564 - A-HA, HA. OH, HOW YOU KNOW ME. 580 00:23:17,564 --> 00:23:18,898 - YOU REALLY THINK THAT JOKE IS WORTH IT? 581 00:23:18,898 --> 00:23:21,300 - IT'S NOT A JOKE. IT'S A LESSON. 582 00:23:21,300 --> 00:23:23,470 TAMARA NEEDS TO LEARN THAT SHE CAN'T CONTROL EVERYTHING. 583 00:23:23,470 --> 00:23:24,904 - STARTING WITH YOU IN A CLOWN SUIT. 584 00:23:24,904 --> 00:23:29,208 - DAMN STRAIGHT. 585 00:23:29,208 --> 00:23:31,143 - SO BAILEY. 586 00:23:31,143 --> 00:23:32,144 IS THIS JUST A DATE? 587 00:23:32,144 --> 00:23:35,081 OR IS SHE GIRLFRIEND MATERIAL? 588 00:23:35,081 --> 00:23:36,783 - MM. 589 00:23:36,783 --> 00:23:38,317 TOO EARLY TO TELL. 590 00:23:38,317 --> 00:23:40,186 BUT THERE'S SOMETHING REALLY COOL ABOUT HER. 591 00:23:40,186 --> 00:23:41,921 SHE'S JUST LESS INSECURE THAN OTHER GIRLS, YOU KNOW? 592 00:23:41,921 --> 00:23:44,791 AND FOR WHATEVER REASON, MAKES ME NERVOUS. 593 00:23:44,791 --> 00:23:46,058 - [laughs] 594 00:23:46,058 --> 00:23:48,528 SO YOU'VE BEEN DOING A LOT OF PIT SNIFFING? 595 00:23:48,528 --> 00:23:50,530 - MAYBE. [both laugh] 596 00:23:50,530 --> 00:23:51,931 SHE'S THE FIRST GIRL I'VE HUNG OUT WITH 597 00:23:51,931 --> 00:23:55,768 WHO DOESN'T MAKE ME MISS JENNA. 598 00:23:55,768 --> 00:23:57,136 [bleep] - WHAT? 599 00:23:57,136 --> 00:23:58,605 - JENNA ASKED ME TO HELP HER GET A DATE, 600 00:23:58,605 --> 00:23:59,772 AND I TOTALLY SPACED. 601 00:23:59,772 --> 00:24:01,140 - NAH, DON'T SWEAT IT. IT WAS A PLOY. 602 00:24:01,140 --> 00:24:02,675 JENNA WAS TRYING TO GET YOU TO ASK HER. 603 00:24:02,675 --> 00:24:06,078 SHE WANTED TO GO WITH YOU. 604 00:24:06,078 --> 00:24:07,780 - IT WAS A LAST-DITCH EFFORT. 605 00:24:07,780 --> 00:24:09,015 WE JUST FIGURED IF WE GOT YOU A TICKET, 606 00:24:09,015 --> 00:24:10,683 YOU'D COME WITH US TONIGHT. 607 00:24:10,683 --> 00:24:12,552 - AND WEAR WHAT? A DRESS CUT IN HALF? 608 00:24:12,552 --> 00:24:14,521 - OR SOMETHING IN YOUR MOM'S CLOSET. 609 00:24:14,521 --> 00:24:16,856 - NOTHING IN MY MOM'S CLOSET IS APPROPRIATE. 610 00:24:16,856 --> 00:24:19,258 BESIDES, I HAVE TO FINISH MY PAPER THIS WEEKEND, 611 00:24:19,258 --> 00:24:20,560 AND I HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED. 612 00:24:20,560 --> 00:24:22,428 - YOU CAN DO THAT TOMORROW, BUT TONIGHT, 613 00:24:22,428 --> 00:24:23,830 YOU ARE GONNA BORROW THE PERFECT DRESS 614 00:24:23,830 --> 00:24:25,231 THAT I CAN'T WEAR AND ISN'T RETURNABLE, 615 00:24:25,231 --> 00:24:26,666 'CAUSE I HAD TO BUY A BLACK SACK, 616 00:24:26,666 --> 00:24:28,167 'CAUSE I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT COLOR JAKE IS WEARING 617 00:24:28,167 --> 00:24:29,736 AND I DON'T WANNA CLASH. 618 00:24:29,736 --> 00:24:32,104 ALTHOUGH I GUESS BLACK IS APPROPRIATE, 619 00:24:32,104 --> 00:24:33,573 SEEING AS I'M ALREADY MOURNING THE LOSS 620 00:24:33,573 --> 00:24:34,974 OF MY MAGIC NIGHT. 621 00:24:34,974 --> 00:24:37,677 - DON'T SAY "MAGIC NIGHT." IT'S A CLICHE. 622 00:24:37,677 --> 00:24:39,812 I MEAN, EXPLAIN TO ME WHY SEX IS CONSIDERED MAGIC. 623 00:24:39,812 --> 00:24:41,548 AND WHY DOES EVERYONE HAVE TO HAVE IT AFTER PROM? 624 00:24:41,548 --> 00:24:43,315 WHY CAN'T WE JUST PLAY [bleep]ING MAH-JONGG INSTEAD? 625 00:24:43,315 --> 00:24:45,317 - EASY, GIRL. YOU'RE AT AN 11. 626 00:24:45,317 --> 00:24:46,786 - [sighs] YOU'RE RIGHT. 627 00:24:46,786 --> 00:24:48,855 I NEED TO TAKE IT BACK TO A SIX, 628 00:24:48,855 --> 00:24:51,223 ESPECIALLY SINCE I HAVE A FOOLPROOF PLAN 629 00:24:51,223 --> 00:24:53,359 TO AVOID OPERATION: PANTY DROP. 630 00:24:53,359 --> 00:24:54,426 - EXPLAIN. 631 00:24:54,426 --> 00:24:55,895 - I TOLD FRED THAT PART OF THE DEAL 632 00:24:55,895 --> 00:24:58,430 OF GOING TO PROM MEANT HAVING DINNER WITH MY PARENTS FIRST. 633 00:24:58,430 --> 00:25:00,967 AND ONCE THEY CONFIRM THAT HE HAS A PENIS-- 634 00:25:00,967 --> 00:25:03,836 'CAUSE HE'S A BOY-- I'M GONNA GET AN-- 635 00:25:03,836 --> 00:25:04,871 both: EARLY CURFEW. 636 00:25:04,871 --> 00:25:06,873 - FOOLPROOF. 637 00:25:06,873 --> 00:25:09,809 [sighs] 638 00:25:18,384 --> 00:25:19,586 - [laughs] 639 00:25:19,586 --> 00:25:22,622 EVERYTHING'S SO DELICIOUS AND HEALTHY. 640 00:25:22,622 --> 00:25:26,859 DO YOU STEAM EVERYTHING YOU EAT? 641 00:25:26,859 --> 00:25:28,360 - STEAM IS GOOD FOR BODY. 642 00:25:28,360 --> 00:25:32,064 - IS THAT WHY YOU HAVE SUCH A LOVELY FIGURE? 643 00:25:34,133 --> 00:25:35,401 - ARE YOU CHECKING OUT MY MOM? 644 00:25:35,401 --> 00:25:38,638 - WHAT? NO. 645 00:25:38,638 --> 00:25:40,707 NOT THAT YOU DON'T HAVE A LOVELY ONE. 646 00:25:40,707 --> 00:25:43,442 BUT THAT WOULD BE INAPPROPRIATE. 647 00:25:43,442 --> 00:25:46,746 - AND YET, YOU DID IT. 648 00:25:46,746 --> 00:25:48,214 - YOU KNOW WHAT'S AWESOME ABOUT FRED? 649 00:25:48,214 --> 00:25:50,082 - OH, FINALLY. 650 00:25:50,082 --> 00:25:51,483 - HE'S NOT A CONFORMIST. 651 00:25:51,483 --> 00:25:53,620 HE'S AN ASIAN KID WHO DOESN'T PLAY AN INSTRUMENT, 652 00:25:53,620 --> 00:25:57,089 DOESN'T GET PARTICULARLY GOOD GRADES, 653 00:25:57,089 --> 00:26:00,627 AND HE MIGHT WANNA GO TO ART SCHOOL. 654 00:26:00,627 --> 00:26:02,528 - [laughs] IT'S--IT'S--IT'S-- 655 00:26:02,528 --> 00:26:06,398 THAT IS IF BUSINESS SCHOOL DOESN'T WORK OUT. 656 00:26:09,468 --> 00:26:11,003 - I'M GONNA PASS OUT. 657 00:26:11,003 --> 00:26:12,438 - THAT'S A GOOD SIGN. 658 00:26:12,438 --> 00:26:13,806 THAT MEANS YOU'RE GETTING DEHYDRATED, 659 00:26:13,806 --> 00:26:16,676 AND YOUR ORGANS ARE STARTING TO SHRIVEL UP. 660 00:26:16,676 --> 00:26:19,345 - IS THAT DANGEROUS? - ABSOLUTELY. 661 00:26:19,345 --> 00:26:22,815 BUT YOUR STOMACH WILL BE FLAT...ER. 662 00:26:22,815 --> 00:26:24,450 ANYWAY, YOU'RE ALMOST THERE, 663 00:26:24,450 --> 00:26:26,719 AND IN 20 MORE MINUTES, YOU'LL FINALLY LOOK GOOD 664 00:26:26,719 --> 00:26:27,720 IN THAT DRESS. 665 00:26:27,720 --> 00:26:30,022 - 20 MORE MINUTES? - SUCK IT UP. 666 00:26:30,022 --> 00:26:31,423 BIG GIRLS DON'T CRY. - WHORE. 667 00:26:31,423 --> 00:26:32,925 - BITCH. 668 00:26:32,925 --> 00:26:35,327 - I'M NERVOUS ABOUT TONIGHT. 669 00:26:35,327 --> 00:26:38,064 I THINK I'M IN LOVE. - [sighs] 670 00:26:38,064 --> 00:26:39,531 [bleep]. 671 00:26:39,531 --> 00:26:40,833 IS IT TIME FOR THE TALK? 672 00:26:40,833 --> 00:26:43,369 - I'M SQUARED AWAY ON THE BIRDS AND THE BEES. 673 00:26:43,369 --> 00:26:45,437 THANK YOU. - WELL, I'D HOPE SO. 674 00:26:45,437 --> 00:26:48,374 BUT I WAS TALKING ABOUT ORGASMS. 675 00:26:48,374 --> 00:26:49,676 DO YOU KNOW HOW TO GET ONE? 676 00:26:49,676 --> 00:26:52,779 - I'M NOT DISCUSSING THIS WITH YOU. 677 00:26:52,779 --> 00:26:54,681 - I AM JUST TRYING TO GIVE YOU SOME POINTERS 678 00:26:54,681 --> 00:26:56,983 ON HOW TO AVOID FIRST-TIME PAIN. 679 00:26:56,983 --> 00:26:58,885 ALTHOUGH, SINCE YOU'RE OF THE BIG-BONED VARIETY, 680 00:26:58,885 --> 00:27:01,187 YOU'RE PROBABLY BIG DOWNSTAIRS TOO. 681 00:27:01,187 --> 00:27:03,589 - JESUS. 682 00:27:03,589 --> 00:27:04,991 - LET ME--LET ME JUST SHOW YOU ONE TECHNIQUE. 683 00:27:04,991 --> 00:27:07,526 - PLEASE DON'T. 684 00:27:07,526 --> 00:27:09,495 - I'M NOT GONNA TAKE OUT MY HOO-HA. 685 00:27:09,495 --> 00:27:11,297 I'M JUST GONNA SHOW YOU A LITTLE TRICK YOU CAN DO 686 00:27:11,297 --> 00:27:13,933 EVEN WITH YOUR CLOTHES ON. 687 00:27:13,933 --> 00:27:15,467 BUT YOU GOTTA STRETCH FIRST. 688 00:27:15,467 --> 00:27:17,536 YOU KNOW, WARM UP. 689 00:27:17,536 --> 00:27:20,539 - STOP, NOW I WANT TO PASS OUT AND THROW UP. 690 00:27:20,539 --> 00:27:21,808 - YOU'RE NOT GONNA PASS OUT. 691 00:27:21,808 --> 00:27:25,311 SO STOP YOU'RE BITCHIN', AND WATCH ME WORK. 692 00:27:25,311 --> 00:27:26,512 [pants] 693 00:27:26,512 --> 00:27:28,014 * WOW 694 00:27:28,014 --> 00:27:29,281 - I'M REALLY NOT FEELING GOOD. 695 00:27:29,281 --> 00:27:31,083 I'M LIGHT-HEADED. I'M WOOZY. 696 00:27:31,083 --> 00:27:34,320 - SHUT IT, NO ONE PASSES OUT IN A-- 697 00:27:40,126 --> 00:27:41,828 - NOTHING WAS COMING TO ME. 698 00:27:41,828 --> 00:27:46,498 I WAS STUCK AND SEEKING ANY AND ALL INSPIRATION. 699 00:27:46,498 --> 00:27:49,501 [soft music] 700 00:27:49,501 --> 00:27:57,443 * 701 00:27:57,443 --> 00:28:01,113 - I HAVE A SURPRISE. 702 00:28:01,113 --> 00:28:03,449 - YOU FIXED MY DRESS? - ME? GOD NO. 703 00:28:03,449 --> 00:28:05,617 BUT MY TAILOR DID, AND YOU WOULD NEVER KNOW 704 00:28:05,617 --> 00:28:09,221 IT WASN'T ALWAYS IN ONE PIECE. 705 00:28:09,221 --> 00:28:11,891 YOU CAN STILL GO TO PROM IF YOU WANT. 706 00:28:11,891 --> 00:28:14,093 - ALONE? - WHY NOT? 707 00:28:14,093 --> 00:28:17,163 - COME ON, YOU NEVER WOULD'VE GONE ALONE. 708 00:28:17,163 --> 00:28:21,901 - NO, BUT I WASN'T NEARLY AS BRAVE AS YOU ARE. 709 00:28:21,901 --> 00:28:24,136 - I'M NOT BRAVE. 710 00:28:24,136 --> 00:28:28,007 BESIDES, I REALLY NEED TO FINISH THIS PAPER. 711 00:28:30,076 --> 00:28:33,612 * 712 00:28:33,612 --> 00:28:36,215 - IS THAT THE LETTER? 713 00:28:36,215 --> 00:28:37,449 - YEAH. 714 00:28:37,449 --> 00:28:41,387 - CAN I SEE IT? 715 00:28:46,225 --> 00:28:49,228 [soft music] 716 00:28:49,228 --> 00:28:57,169 * 717 00:29:02,674 --> 00:29:05,477 - THIS FEELS LIKE A LIFETIME AGO. 718 00:29:05,477 --> 00:29:08,647 - IT WAS. 719 00:29:10,716 --> 00:29:14,821 - GOD, WHAT WAS I THINKING? 720 00:29:20,526 --> 00:29:23,462 [sighs] 721 00:29:26,398 --> 00:29:30,069 CAN YOU IMAGINE 722 00:29:30,069 --> 00:29:34,306 WHAT WOULD'VE HAPPENED IF YOU HADN'T FORGIVEN ME? 723 00:29:34,306 --> 00:29:36,708 IF I HAD NEVER KNOWN 724 00:29:36,708 --> 00:29:40,346 WHAT IT WAS LIKE TO HAVE THIS? 725 00:29:40,346 --> 00:29:43,482 THIS MOMENT, THIS GIFT 726 00:29:43,482 --> 00:29:46,252 OF BEING SO CLOSE TO YOU. 727 00:29:46,252 --> 00:29:50,256 [sniffles] [sighs] 728 00:29:50,256 --> 00:29:52,959 I'M SO SORRY I EVER WROTE IT. 729 00:29:52,959 --> 00:29:57,263 - IT CAME FROM A GOOD PLACE. - NO. 730 00:29:57,263 --> 00:29:59,465 IT WAS CRUEL. 731 00:29:59,465 --> 00:30:02,401 [sighs] 732 00:30:07,907 --> 00:30:09,375 - DID I BECOME THIS PERSON? 733 00:30:09,375 --> 00:30:12,078 - OH, BABE. 734 00:30:12,078 --> 00:30:15,547 - I DROPPED MY FRIENDS, 735 00:30:15,547 --> 00:30:17,116 SECOND-GUESSED MY INSTINCTS. 736 00:30:17,116 --> 00:30:20,019 AND WORST OF ALL, 737 00:30:20,019 --> 00:30:23,155 I WAS CRUEL. 738 00:30:23,155 --> 00:30:26,358 SO, SO CRUEL. 739 00:30:26,358 --> 00:30:29,795 - AND YOUNG. 740 00:30:29,795 --> 00:30:32,231 YOU ARE NOT THIS PERSON. 741 00:30:32,231 --> 00:30:35,301 YOU REALIZED YOUR MISTAKES, 742 00:30:35,301 --> 00:30:37,469 YOU TOOK OWNERSHIP OF THEM, 743 00:30:37,469 --> 00:30:39,105 YOU MADE AMENDS. 744 00:30:39,105 --> 00:30:43,842 HONEY, WITHOUT THE BAD DAYS, 745 00:30:43,842 --> 00:30:46,112 WE CAN NEVER APPRECIATE THE GOOD ONES. 746 00:30:46,112 --> 00:30:49,615 AND THERE ARE SO MANY GOOD DAYS COMING YOUR WAY. 747 00:30:49,615 --> 00:30:52,851 - [sighs] 748 00:30:52,851 --> 00:30:56,222 - JUST DO ME A FAVOR. 749 00:30:56,222 --> 00:30:57,556 - WHAT? 750 00:30:57,556 --> 00:31:01,293 - FORGIVE YOURSELF 751 00:31:01,293 --> 00:31:04,063 LIKE YOU FORGAVE ME. 752 00:31:04,063 --> 00:31:07,066 [soft music] 753 00:31:07,066 --> 00:31:15,007 * 754 00:31:18,377 --> 00:31:21,713 - STOP BEING A [bleep]. 755 00:31:21,713 --> 00:31:25,384 * 756 00:31:25,384 --> 00:31:28,620 - AND THAT'S WHY FRED CAN NEVER GO TO VENTURA COUNTY AGAIN. 757 00:31:28,620 --> 00:31:29,721 - [sighs] 758 00:31:29,721 --> 00:31:32,058 MING, I DROPPED MY NAPKIN. CAN YOU HELP ME? 759 00:31:32,058 --> 00:31:34,460 - AND HE CAN'T EVEN PICK UP A NAPKIN. 760 00:31:34,460 --> 00:31:37,196 - I CAN. 761 00:31:37,196 --> 00:31:39,765 BUT IT SEEMS LIKE YOU'RE STEPPING ON IT. 762 00:31:39,765 --> 00:31:42,401 HELP ME. 763 00:31:42,401 --> 00:31:44,370 - [groans] 764 00:31:44,370 --> 00:31:45,804 - WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? 765 00:31:45,804 --> 00:31:47,473 - I'M JUST TRYING TO HELP MY PARENTS GET TO KNOW YOU. 766 00:31:47,473 --> 00:31:48,807 - AND HATE ME. 767 00:31:48,807 --> 00:31:49,875 WHAT ARE YOU GONNA TELL THEM NEXT? 768 00:31:49,875 --> 00:31:52,278 THAT I'M A CUTTER? - ARE YOU? 769 00:31:52,278 --> 00:31:55,982 - MING MING. 770 00:31:55,982 --> 00:31:57,583 - [clears throat] 771 00:31:57,583 --> 00:32:00,586 - SHOULDN'T YOU BE LEAVING? 772 00:32:00,586 --> 00:32:02,254 - YES. 773 00:32:02,254 --> 00:32:05,524 WHAT TIME DO YOU WANT ME HOME? 774 00:32:07,593 --> 00:32:09,395 - WHENEVER. NO CURFEW. 775 00:32:09,395 --> 00:32:11,797 - WHAT? WHY? 776 00:32:11,797 --> 00:32:15,467 - IT'S PROM. 777 00:32:17,536 --> 00:32:20,506 - MR. HART, ATTACHED IS MY PAPER. 778 00:32:20,506 --> 00:32:23,009 I TOOK YOUR WORDS OF WISDOM TO HEART. 779 00:32:23,009 --> 00:32:24,810 I'M NOT GOING TO RUN FROM MY CRITICS 780 00:32:24,810 --> 00:32:28,247 BECAUSE I'M NOT A [bleep]. 781 00:32:28,247 --> 00:32:31,250 [upbeat rock] 782 00:32:31,250 --> 00:32:34,686 ** 783 00:32:39,491 --> 00:32:42,494 [upbeat music 784 00:32:42,494 --> 00:32:48,867 * 785 00:32:48,867 --> 00:32:54,240 [overlapping chatter] 786 00:32:54,240 --> 00:32:56,808 - ARE YOU NERVOUS? - NO. 787 00:32:56,808 --> 00:32:58,144 - BUT YOU'RE EXHIBITING THE PHYSICAL, 788 00:32:58,144 --> 00:32:59,945 STRESS-INDUCED HABITS THAT ARE TYPICALLY ASSOCIATED 789 00:32:59,945 --> 00:33:01,713 WITH NERVES. 790 00:33:01,713 --> 00:33:03,715 - LIKE WHAT? - RESTLESS HANDS. 791 00:33:03,715 --> 00:33:05,051 RESTLESS FEET. TENSE FACE. 792 00:33:05,051 --> 00:33:07,319 - I DON'T HAVE TENSE FACE. - OBJECTIVELY, YOU DO. 793 00:33:07,319 --> 00:33:10,189 - OBJECTIVELY, YOU DON'T KNOW EVERYTHING. 794 00:33:10,189 --> 00:33:11,323 - THAT WOULD BE A CORRECT STATEMENT. 795 00:33:11,323 --> 00:33:13,059 BUT IN THIS CASE, I KNOW NERVES, 796 00:33:13,059 --> 00:33:16,362 AND I KNOW YOU. 797 00:33:16,362 --> 00:33:20,466 - WELL, IF YOU KNOW ME, THEN WHY AM I NERVOUS? 798 00:33:20,466 --> 00:33:23,902 - MAY I TOUCH YOU? 799 00:33:23,902 --> 00:33:27,239 - OKAY. 800 00:33:30,876 --> 00:33:33,179 - THE RHYTHMS OF YOUR HEART ARE FAST AND FURIOUS, 801 00:33:33,179 --> 00:33:34,613 PROVING MY FIRST ASSUMPTION WAS CORRECT. 802 00:33:34,613 --> 00:33:35,614 - AND WHAT ASSUMPTION WAS THAT? 803 00:33:35,614 --> 00:33:36,615 - THE ASSUMPTION THAT YOU LOVE ME 804 00:33:36,615 --> 00:33:37,783 AND YOU'RE AFRAID TO SAY IT. 805 00:33:37,783 --> 00:33:39,451 - NOT TRUE. - THAT WASN'T A QUESTION. 806 00:33:39,451 --> 00:33:41,153 IT WAS A STATEMENT. - SO WHAT? 807 00:33:41,153 --> 00:33:42,454 ARE YOU GONNA LEAVE NOW? 808 00:33:42,454 --> 00:33:43,822 - NO. - WHY NOT? 809 00:33:43,822 --> 00:33:47,459 - BECAUSE THEN YOU WOULDN'T KNOW THAT I LOVE YOU BACK. 810 00:33:47,459 --> 00:33:48,794 - YOU DO? 811 00:33:48,794 --> 00:33:50,162 - ISN'T IT OBVIOUS? 812 00:33:50,162 --> 00:33:53,799 - NO. 813 00:33:53,799 --> 00:33:56,402 - CAN I KISS YOU NOW? 814 00:33:56,402 --> 00:33:58,804 - YES. 815 00:33:58,804 --> 00:34:01,807 [upbeat music] 816 00:34:01,807 --> 00:34:05,544 * 817 00:34:05,544 --> 00:34:06,878 - SADIE. 818 00:34:06,878 --> 00:34:08,747 - WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 819 00:34:08,747 --> 00:34:11,750 DID JC FINALLY LEAVE THE CHURCH? 820 00:34:11,750 --> 00:34:15,654 - AS A MATTER OF FACT, HE DID. 821 00:34:15,654 --> 00:34:16,822 - HEY, I'M JACK CARTER, 822 00:34:16,822 --> 00:34:19,225 BUT MY FRIENDS CALL ME "JC." 823 00:34:19,225 --> 00:34:21,127 [upbeat music] 824 00:34:21,127 --> 00:34:23,962 * 825 00:34:23,962 --> 00:34:25,131 - ARE YOU READY FOR A CHERRY POP? 826 00:34:25,131 --> 00:34:26,598 - NO. I'M NOT. 827 00:34:26,598 --> 00:34:28,634 I WANNA GO HOME ALONG WITH MY CHERRY 828 00:34:28,634 --> 00:34:29,835 THAT YOU WANNA POP. 829 00:34:29,835 --> 00:34:32,138 - CHERRY SODA. 830 00:34:32,138 --> 00:34:33,772 IN IDAHO, WE CALLED IT "POP." 831 00:34:33,772 --> 00:34:35,241 - LOOK, I'M JUST NO READY TO BUMP AND GRIND, 832 00:34:35,241 --> 00:34:37,143 AND I'M DONE MAKING EXCUSES BECAUSE I DON'T-- 833 00:34:37,143 --> 00:34:38,610 - HUSH. 834 00:34:38,610 --> 00:34:40,879 [sighs] WE DON'T HAVE TO HAVE SEX. 835 00:34:40,879 --> 00:34:43,615 - BUT IT'S PROM, AND YOU HAVE A HOTEL ROOM. 836 00:34:43,615 --> 00:34:46,152 - WHICH I GOT SO WE CAN STAY UP ALL NIGHT 837 00:34:46,152 --> 00:34:48,587 AND WATCH PAY-PER-VIEW. 838 00:34:48,587 --> 00:34:50,689 - THAT'S IT? 839 00:34:50,689 --> 00:34:55,161 - HOPEFULLY, WE CAN MAKE OUT A LITTLE, 840 00:34:55,161 --> 00:34:59,030 OR A LOT. 841 00:34:59,030 --> 00:35:00,732 - I CAN HANDLE THAT. 842 00:35:00,732 --> 00:35:03,169 - [sighs] 843 00:35:03,169 --> 00:35:04,836 - BABE, YOU'VE GOTTA KEEP THE ANIMAL 844 00:35:04,836 --> 00:35:06,071 TO A MINIMUM ON THE DANCE FLOOR. 845 00:35:06,071 --> 00:35:07,072 I'M GONNA PASS OUT. 846 00:35:07,072 --> 00:35:09,675 - WELL, NOT BEFORE I EAT YOU UP. 847 00:35:09,675 --> 00:35:11,443 - I LOVE WHAT THIS JACKET BRINGS OUT IN YOU. 848 00:35:11,443 --> 00:35:12,444 - [laughs] 849 00:35:12,444 --> 00:35:14,580 WELL SEE, SOMETIMES, 850 00:35:14,580 --> 00:35:16,047 YOU GOTTA LET THE WILD THING OUT. 851 00:35:16,047 --> 00:35:18,016 [laughter] 852 00:35:18,016 --> 00:35:19,718 HE MIGHT SURPRISE YOU. 853 00:35:19,718 --> 00:35:22,654 [both laugh] 854 00:35:25,924 --> 00:35:30,429 AH, THE OLD SNIFF OF THE PIT. 855 00:35:30,429 --> 00:35:32,063 - WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? 856 00:35:32,063 --> 00:35:33,699 - IT MEANS I NEED TO GET US SOME DRINKS. 857 00:35:33,699 --> 00:35:37,436 [clears throat] 858 00:35:37,436 --> 00:35:41,307 * 859 00:35:41,307 --> 00:35:45,211 - AND THE LOSER GOES STAG. 860 00:35:45,211 --> 00:35:47,213 SURPRISED YOU COULDN'T FIND A DATE. 861 00:35:47,213 --> 00:35:50,882 CHEATING, LYING SKITCHES ARE USUALLY IN HOT DEMAND. 862 00:35:52,951 --> 00:35:54,052 WEIRD. 863 00:35:54,052 --> 00:35:56,355 MAKING FUN OF YOU HAS LOST ITS LUSTER 864 00:35:56,355 --> 00:35:57,823 'CAUSE NOW ANYTHING AWFUL 865 00:35:57,823 --> 00:36:00,226 I COULD SAY ABOUT YOU IS TRUE. 866 00:36:00,226 --> 00:36:02,794 - THANK YOU. 867 00:36:02,794 --> 00:36:06,232 - YOU'RE WELCOME. 868 00:36:08,300 --> 00:36:10,702 - HEY. I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE HERE. 869 00:36:10,702 --> 00:36:13,305 - HAVING A GOOD TIME? - YEAH, EVEN BETTER NOW. 870 00:36:13,305 --> 00:36:15,040 - WELL, I'M ON THE FENCE ABOUT STAYING, 871 00:36:15,040 --> 00:36:17,809 BUT I'M GIVING MYSELF 20 MINUTES. 872 00:36:17,809 --> 00:36:22,281 - WELL, IF IT ISN'T THE TWO MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRLS IN THE ROOM. 873 00:36:22,281 --> 00:36:23,315 UH, DRINK? 874 00:36:23,315 --> 00:36:24,950 - NO, THANK YOU. 875 00:36:24,950 --> 00:36:27,953 [down-tempo rock] 876 00:36:27,953 --> 00:36:33,959 ** 877 00:36:33,959 --> 00:36:37,429 - HEY, HOW 'BOUT YOU GUYS HAVE THIS DANCE? 878 00:36:37,429 --> 00:36:39,831 - NO, I AM JUST HERE TO HANG, 879 00:36:39,831 --> 00:36:40,866 NOT TO INTRUDE. 880 00:36:40,866 --> 00:36:43,269 - NAH, YOU WOULDN'T BE. COME. 881 00:36:43,269 --> 00:36:46,705 JUST ONE SONG. 882 00:36:46,705 --> 00:36:49,708 [soft rock music] 883 00:36:49,708 --> 00:36:57,649 * 884 00:37:02,921 --> 00:37:04,690 - YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS. 885 00:37:04,690 --> 00:37:08,327 - I KNOW I DON'T HAVE TO, BUT I WANT TO. 886 00:37:10,296 --> 00:37:13,465 - YOUR DRESS LOOKS BETTER WITHOUT THE HOODIE. 887 00:37:13,465 --> 00:37:14,666 - CAUGHT. - [chuckles] 888 00:37:14,666 --> 00:37:16,302 I BOUGHT IT STUPIDLY THINKING 889 00:37:16,302 --> 00:37:18,637 YOU WERE GOING TO ASK ME TO PROM. 890 00:37:18,637 --> 00:37:21,640 - AND WHY IS THAT STUPID? 891 00:37:21,640 --> 00:37:24,676 - BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T. 892 00:37:26,745 --> 00:37:29,315 - I DIDN'T KNOW WE WERE STILL OPEN. 893 00:37:29,315 --> 00:37:31,950 - AND I DIDN'T KNOW WE WERE CLOSED. 894 00:37:35,321 --> 00:37:37,323 - I FEEL AWFUL, BUT I-- - DON'T. 895 00:37:37,323 --> 00:37:39,725 DON'T SAY IT. 896 00:37:39,725 --> 00:37:43,795 I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT WHEN I HURT YOU, 897 00:37:43,795 --> 00:37:47,032 I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND WHAT I WAS DOING. 898 00:37:47,032 --> 00:37:50,402 BUT I DO NOW. 899 00:37:53,104 --> 00:37:56,342 I DIDN'T LOVE MYSELF ENOUGH TO LET YOU LOVE ME. 900 00:37:56,342 --> 00:38:04,350 * 901 00:38:17,763 --> 00:38:19,498 - THANKS FOR THE DANCE. 902 00:38:19,498 --> 00:38:20,532 - THE PLEASURE WAS ALL MINE. 903 00:38:20,532 --> 00:38:24,202 NOW, GET BACK TO YOUR DATE. 904 00:38:24,202 --> 00:38:27,138 - WILL DO. 905 00:38:34,245 --> 00:38:37,248 [upbeat folk] 906 00:38:37,248 --> 00:38:43,188 ** 907 00:38:43,188 --> 00:38:45,924 - I HAD BEEN STRUGGLING TO THINK OF WHAT TO SAY, 908 00:38:45,924 --> 00:38:48,193 SO I STOPPED THINKING. 909 00:38:48,193 --> 00:38:49,895 I WAS CONVINCED I DIDN'T KNOW 910 00:38:49,895 --> 00:38:51,530 WHO I WANTED TO BE. 911 00:38:51,530 --> 00:38:52,964 AND THEN, I REALIZED 912 00:38:52,964 --> 00:38:57,002 THE ANSWER WAS ALL AROUND ME. 913 00:38:57,002 --> 00:39:00,406 I WANNA BE SOMEONE WHO IS WILLING TO FORGIVE. 914 00:39:02,708 --> 00:39:04,410 I WANNA BE SOMEONE THAT CARES MORE 915 00:39:04,410 --> 00:39:08,814 ABOUT OTHERS THAN THEMSELVES. 916 00:39:08,814 --> 00:39:12,083 I WANNA BE SOMEONE WHO CAN TELL IT LIKE IT IS. 917 00:39:14,986 --> 00:39:17,423 I WANNA BE SOMEONE WHO WOULD GIVE UP EVERYTHING 918 00:39:17,423 --> 00:39:21,126 FOR THE RIGHT REASON. 919 00:39:21,126 --> 00:39:25,631 I WANNA BE SOMEONE WHO SEES THE BEST IN EVERYONE. 920 00:39:28,567 --> 00:39:31,136 I WANNA BE SOMEONE WHO IS A TRUE FRIEND. 921 00:39:31,136 --> 00:39:34,473 * 922 00:39:34,473 --> 00:39:36,508 - I WANNA BE SOMEONE WHO ALWAYS TRIES 923 00:39:36,508 --> 00:39:39,811 TO BE A BETTER PERSON, 924 00:39:39,811 --> 00:39:42,681 AND SOMEONE WHO LEARNS FROM THEIR MISTAKES. 925 00:39:42,681 --> 00:39:44,450 I GUESS I JUST WANNA BE SOMEONE 926 00:39:44,450 --> 00:39:46,184 WHO ENCOMPASSES ALL THOSE THINGS 927 00:39:46,184 --> 00:39:48,319 SO I CAN FINALLY BE 928 00:39:48,319 --> 00:39:51,957 THAT GIRL WHO DOESN'T NEED A BOY TO BE HAPPY 929 00:39:51,957 --> 00:39:54,926 BECAUSE I'LL KNOW HOW TO DANCE ALL ON MY OWN.