1 00:00:08,417 --> 00:00:11,834 [keys clacking] 2 00:00:11,834 --> 00:00:13,917 - I NEED YOU TO TALK TO ANDREW LESLEY. 3 00:00:13,917 --> 00:00:15,166 - THERE IS NO WAY WE ARE SPEAKING 4 00:00:15,166 --> 00:00:18,417 TO THAT SMUG, DUPLICITOUS TALKING SCARF. 5 00:00:18,417 --> 00:00:20,166 - IF YOU DO THIS FOR ME, 6 00:00:20,166 --> 00:00:22,625 I WILL TAKE YOU TO A GOLDEN GLOBES GIFTING SUITE. 7 00:00:22,625 --> 00:00:24,458 - SAY MORE. 8 00:00:26,542 --> 00:00:27,875 - SO THIS IS FANTASTIC. 9 00:00:27,875 --> 00:00:30,291 IT'S SOPHISTICATED AND HILARIOUS, 10 00:00:30,291 --> 00:00:32,375 AND YOU'VE BEEN HEARING THAT STUFF ALL DAY LONG. 11 00:00:32,375 --> 00:00:34,458 - SO WAS I RIGHT? 12 00:00:34,458 --> 00:00:35,959 SHE'S GREAT, RIGHT? 13 00:00:35,959 --> 00:00:38,166 - SHE'S VERY IMPRESSIVE. - JESUS. 14 00:00:38,166 --> 00:00:39,792 JUST TELL ME WE'RE GETTING THE FUCKING SHOW. 15 00:00:39,792 --> 00:00:42,083 - IT'S PROBABLY A HUGE MISTAKE, 16 00:00:42,083 --> 00:00:44,208 AND I'M SURE THERE'LL COME A DAY 17 00:00:44,208 --> 00:00:45,625 WHEN I REGRET THIS-- 18 00:00:45,625 --> 00:00:46,667 - SO IT'S A YES! 19 00:00:46,667 --> 00:00:48,041 [giggling, clapping excitedly] 20 00:00:48,041 --> 00:00:49,291 - WHAT WE NEED TO DO 21 00:00:49,291 --> 00:00:51,750 IS LOOK AT REDUCING YOUR EXPENSES. 22 00:00:51,750 --> 00:00:53,834 - CHILD SUPPORT, ALIMONY-- 23 00:00:53,834 --> 00:00:55,458 - ACTUALLY, THAT ONE'S GOING AWAY. 24 00:00:55,458 --> 00:00:56,917 MY EX-WIFE'S GETTING REMARRIED. 25 00:00:56,917 --> 00:00:59,500 - WELL, THAT'S A SIZEABLE SAVINGS. 26 00:00:59,500 --> 00:01:00,834 CONGRATULATIONS. 27 00:01:00,834 --> 00:01:02,375 - WHERE ARE WE WITH OLLIE? 28 00:01:02,375 --> 00:01:03,834 - IT'S OVER. - SO THAT'S IT? 29 00:01:03,834 --> 00:01:05,709 IT'S JUST--JUST OVER? 30 00:01:05,709 --> 00:01:07,208 - YEAH. OVER. 31 00:01:07,208 --> 00:01:08,917 - OH, JESUS. 32 00:01:08,917 --> 00:01:11,000 - ARE THOSE TEARS IN YOUR EYES? 33 00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:13,500 - THIS IS VERY UPSETTING. 34 00:01:16,583 --> 00:01:19,000 [keys clacking] 35 00:01:26,750 --> 00:01:30,041 [wind blows] 36 00:01:30,041 --> 00:01:32,875 [quirky music] 37 00:01:32,875 --> 00:01:40,959 ♪ ♪ 38 00:01:56,208 --> 00:01:58,125 [gunshot] 39 00:02:05,625 --> 00:02:07,000 OKAY, WATCH. 40 00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:08,542 FIRST YOU DRAW MR. FROGGIE'S EYES, 41 00:02:08,542 --> 00:02:10,166 LIKE THIS. 42 00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:15,750 NOW LET'S GIVE HIM A CHIN. 43 00:02:15,750 --> 00:02:18,125 HE'S GONNA NEED SOME LEGS... 44 00:02:21,500 --> 00:02:24,000 AND A MOUTH. 45 00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:25,417 AND HE'S REALLY SURPRISED, 46 00:02:25,417 --> 00:02:28,125 'CAUSE HE'S NOT A FROG AT ALL. 47 00:02:28,125 --> 00:02:31,417 HE'S A-- WHAT? 48 00:02:36,500 --> 00:02:38,250 - HUH. - WHAT? 49 00:02:38,250 --> 00:02:39,583 - SOMETHING FROM TIM WHITTICK. 50 00:02:39,583 --> 00:02:41,583 - [groans] - HE'S IN TOWN. 51 00:02:41,583 --> 00:02:42,750 WANTS TO HAVE LUNCH WITH US. 52 00:02:42,750 --> 00:02:45,625 - WITH "US" OR WITH "YOU"? 53 00:02:45,625 --> 00:02:47,166 - COULD BE THE PLURAL "YOU." 54 00:02:47,166 --> 00:02:48,917 - DARLING, HE HATES ME. - HE DOESN'T. 55 00:02:48,917 --> 00:02:50,333 - [laughing] OH, PLEASE. 56 00:02:50,333 --> 00:02:52,041 IN HIS MIND, IF I HADN'T COME ALONG, 57 00:02:52,041 --> 00:02:54,750 YOU'D STILL BE WRITING TOGETHER. 58 00:02:54,750 --> 00:02:56,000 HE CALLS ME YOKO. 59 00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:57,834 - HE DOESN'T CALL YOU YOKO. 60 00:02:57,834 --> 00:02:59,625 - WELL, OBVIOUSLY, NOT TO MY FACE, BUT-- 61 00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:04,041 ALL RIGHT, I'VE NEVER TOLD YOU THIS 62 00:03:04,041 --> 00:03:06,166 BECAUSE I KNOW YOU'LL SAY I'M CRAZY, 63 00:03:06,166 --> 00:03:09,917 BUT EVERY TIME HE SEES ME, HE SOMEHOW MANAGES 64 00:03:09,917 --> 00:03:13,458 TO WORK THE WORD "ONO" INTO THE CONVERSATION. 65 00:03:13,458 --> 00:03:16,375 "OH, NO." [phone ringing] 66 00:03:16,375 --> 00:03:17,625 - YEAH, YOU'RE CRAZY. 67 00:03:17,625 --> 00:03:20,000 - ARE YOU STILL THERE? 68 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:21,583 - OF COURSE WE'RE STILL HERE. 69 00:03:21,583 --> 00:03:23,125 THERE'S NO OTHER WAY OUT. 70 00:03:23,125 --> 00:03:26,166 - SEAN AND BEVERLY'S OFFICE. 71 00:03:26,166 --> 00:03:29,458 EILEEN JAFFEE ON ONE. 72 00:03:29,458 --> 00:03:30,792 - HELLO. 73 00:03:30,792 --> 00:03:32,792 - SO ARE YOU DYING? 74 00:03:32,792 --> 00:03:35,041 - A LITTLE BIT EVERY DAY. 75 00:03:35,041 --> 00:03:38,208 - SERIOUSLY, FRONT PAGE OF THE TRADES. 76 00:03:38,208 --> 00:03:39,625 - WHAT? - YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THEM YET? 77 00:03:39,625 --> 00:03:40,583 - NO. 78 00:03:40,583 --> 00:03:41,875 - THERE'S A WHOLE THING 79 00:03:41,875 --> 00:03:44,125 ABOUT YOU GUYS SELLING THE SHOW. 80 00:03:44,125 --> 00:03:46,250 - WENDY, HAVE THE TRADES ARRIVED YET? 81 00:03:46,250 --> 00:03:47,667 - WHAT TRAINS? 82 00:03:47,667 --> 00:03:50,000 - TRADES. 83 00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:53,083 HANG ON, EILEEN. 84 00:03:55,041 --> 00:03:57,291 LOOK AT THAT. 85 00:03:57,291 --> 00:03:59,125 - I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DIDN'T SEE IT. 86 00:03:59,125 --> 00:04:01,458 - I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY USED THAT STUPID PICTURE. 87 00:04:01,458 --> 00:04:03,959 I LOOK LIKE I'M IN A FAILED BOY BAND. 88 00:04:03,959 --> 00:04:06,458 - FORGET THE PICTURE. ENJOY THIS. 89 00:04:06,458 --> 00:04:08,333 A STRAIGHT-TO-SERIES PICKUP-- 90 00:04:08,333 --> 00:04:12,083 THERE ARE 300 TV WRITERS WHO HATE YOU TODAY. 91 00:04:12,083 --> 00:04:14,041 IT DOESN'T GET BETTER THAN THAT. 92 00:04:14,041 --> 00:04:15,875 - YOU DO LIKE THE ENVY. - MM-HMM. 93 00:04:15,875 --> 00:04:17,417 - ALL RIGHT, I'M JUMPING OFF. 94 00:04:17,417 --> 00:04:20,500 MAZEL TOV, AS YOU PROBABLY DON'T SAY. 95 00:04:20,500 --> 00:04:23,250 - BYE. - THANK YOU. 96 00:04:23,250 --> 00:04:26,000 "NEWLY APPOINTED NETWORK PREXY HELEN BASCH SAYS, 97 00:04:26,000 --> 00:04:29,000 'WE'RE THRILLED TO BE WORKING WITH A SCRIPT OF THIS CALIBER.'" 98 00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:30,750 THANK YOU, HELEN. 99 00:04:30,750 --> 00:04:32,166 - NO TURNING BACK NOW. 100 00:04:32,166 --> 00:04:33,917 - YOU REALLY CAN'T LET YOURSELF ENJOY IT? 101 00:04:33,917 --> 00:04:35,834 - NOT AND STILL BE ME. 102 00:04:35,834 --> 00:04:38,250 [sighs] 103 00:04:38,250 --> 00:04:41,417 [keys clacking] 104 00:04:42,792 --> 00:04:44,375 - OKAY. 105 00:04:44,375 --> 00:04:45,709 ON A SCALE OF ONE TO TEN, 106 00:04:45,709 --> 00:04:47,750 HOW AWKWARD WOULD THIS BE? 107 00:04:47,750 --> 00:04:49,417 MERC LAPIDUS... - FIVE. 108 00:04:49,417 --> 00:04:51,583 - WANTS TO COME IN AND PITCH A SHOW... 109 00:04:51,583 --> 00:04:54,625 - SEVEN. - AND I'M PROBABLY GONNA BUY IT. 110 00:04:54,625 --> 00:04:56,333 - IT GOES UP TO TEN, RIGHT? 111 00:04:56,333 --> 00:04:59,208 WHAT'S HE PITCHING? - I HAVE NO IDEA. 112 00:04:59,208 --> 00:05:00,750 - BUT YOU KNOW YOU'RE GONNA BUY IT? 113 00:05:00,750 --> 00:05:02,792 - I SORT OF HAVE TO. 114 00:05:02,792 --> 00:05:04,000 - BECAUSE? 115 00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:05,625 - HE GAVE ME MY FIRST JOB. 116 00:05:05,625 --> 00:05:06,959 - NO WAY. 117 00:05:06,959 --> 00:05:09,792 - YEAH, SO I KIND OF OWE HIM. 118 00:05:09,792 --> 00:05:11,291 AT LEAST THAT'S WHAT HE SAID. 119 00:05:11,291 --> 00:05:12,458 - YOU TALKED TO HIM? 120 00:05:12,458 --> 00:05:14,125 - OH, I LISTENED. HE BEGGED. 121 00:05:14,125 --> 00:05:15,959 HE'S VERY GOOD WITH THE BEGGING. 122 00:05:15,959 --> 00:05:17,709 - BELIEVE ME, I KNOW. 123 00:05:17,709 --> 00:05:18,709 - MM. 124 00:05:18,709 --> 00:05:19,917 - NO. NO. 125 00:05:19,917 --> 00:05:22,375 I-I DIDN'T MEAN... 126 00:05:22,375 --> 00:05:24,208 THAT WAY. 127 00:05:24,208 --> 00:05:26,166 WHAT? LOOK, I-- 128 00:05:26,166 --> 00:05:27,792 I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'VE HEARD-- 129 00:05:27,792 --> 00:05:29,291 - I HEARD THAT IT LASTED FIVE YEARS 130 00:05:29,291 --> 00:05:30,542 AND ENDED WHEN HE LEFT. 131 00:05:30,542 --> 00:05:32,792 - SO YOU'RE PRETTY MUCH CAUGHT UP. 132 00:05:32,792 --> 00:05:34,834 - I JUST THINK I'VE GOT TO DO SOMETHING. 133 00:05:34,834 --> 00:05:36,583 I MEAN, HIS WHOLE LIFE WENT TO SHIT. 134 00:05:36,583 --> 00:05:38,500 FIRST THE FIRING, THEN THE DIVORCE, 135 00:05:38,500 --> 00:05:40,417 NOW THE LARRY PENZEL THING. 136 00:05:40,417 --> 00:05:41,583 - OH, MY GOD, HE WAS IN THAT? 137 00:05:41,583 --> 00:05:44,166 - SUPPOSEDLY, HE TOOK A BIG HIT. 138 00:05:44,166 --> 00:05:46,917 SO YOU'RE GONNA BE OKAY HAVING HIM HERE? 139 00:05:46,917 --> 00:05:48,250 - ABSOLUTELY. 140 00:05:48,250 --> 00:05:49,917 I'LL BE FINE. HONEST. 141 00:05:49,917 --> 00:05:52,333 - HONEST ON A SCALE OF-- - LET'S SAY TWO. 142 00:05:52,333 --> 00:05:54,458 - GOOD ENOUGH. 143 00:05:56,500 --> 00:05:57,667 - CAMERA SET. 144 00:05:57,667 --> 00:05:59,875 - AND BACKGROUND. AND... 145 00:05:59,875 --> 00:06:01,875 - ACTION. [board claps] 146 00:06:10,750 --> 00:06:11,667 - LINE? 147 00:06:11,667 --> 00:06:13,834 - "MORNING." 148 00:06:13,834 --> 00:06:14,834 - MORNING. 149 00:06:14,834 --> 00:06:16,041 - IF YOU COULD READ, 150 00:06:16,041 --> 00:06:17,375 YOU'D SEE THE LIBRARY IS CLOSED. 151 00:06:19,917 --> 00:06:21,542 - LINE? 152 00:06:21,542 --> 00:06:24,542 - "SO I HEAR YOU AND MY BROTHER HAD A GOOD TIME." 153 00:06:24,542 --> 00:06:27,667 - SO I HEAR YOU AND MY BROTHER HAD A GOOD TIME. 154 00:06:27,667 --> 00:06:29,125 - FOR ABOUT THREE MINUTES. 155 00:06:29,125 --> 00:06:31,709 UNFORTUNATELY, THE DATE LASTED THREE HOURS. 156 00:06:37,375 --> 00:06:38,709 - LINE? 157 00:06:38,709 --> 00:06:41,750 - "HEY, WHO'S THE PERSON WHO WARNED YOU ABOUT HIM 158 00:06:41,750 --> 00:06:44,417 "IN NOT JUST ONE, NOT JUST TWO, 159 00:06:44,417 --> 00:06:46,208 "BUT FIVE EMAILS, 160 00:06:46,208 --> 00:06:49,834 ONE OF WHICH HAD AN EMOTICON OF A WAGGING FINGER?" 161 00:06:55,041 --> 00:06:56,208 - HEY, I WARNED YOU. 162 00:06:56,208 --> 00:06:58,375 - ARE YOU KIDDING ME? 163 00:06:58,375 --> 00:06:59,625 - LINE? 164 00:06:59,625 --> 00:07:01,250 - NO, ASSHOLE. THAT'S ME TALKING. 165 00:07:01,250 --> 00:07:02,917 YOU HAVE SIX FUCKING LINES IN THE WHOLE EPISODE. 166 00:07:02,917 --> 00:07:04,291 - OH, WHO GIVES A SHIT? - JESUS CHRIST. 167 00:07:04,291 --> 00:07:06,166 - NO ONE'S GONNA SEE THIS PIECE OF CRAP. 168 00:07:06,166 --> 00:07:07,583 - HOW HARD IS IT TO LEARN THEM? 169 00:07:07,583 --> 00:07:09,750 - I'M NOT GONNA WASTE MY FUCKING TIME LEARNING IT. 170 00:07:09,750 --> 00:07:12,208 - [sighs] 171 00:07:12,208 --> 00:07:13,834 - SHALL WE CONTINUE? 172 00:07:13,834 --> 00:07:16,792 - YOU NEED TO SEE THE SCRIPT? - NO, I'M GOOD. 173 00:07:16,792 --> 00:07:17,834 - AND ACTION. 174 00:07:17,834 --> 00:07:19,000 - LINE? - SON OF A BITCH! 175 00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:21,208 - CUT! 176 00:07:21,208 --> 00:07:24,041 - ALL RIGHT, I THINK WE GOT THAT. 177 00:07:24,041 --> 00:07:25,625 - WE DIDN'T EVEN GET TO THE END OF THE SCENE. 178 00:07:25,625 --> 00:07:27,917 - IT DOESN'T MATTER. IT'S GOOD ENOUGH. 179 00:07:27,917 --> 00:07:30,542 - IS THIS ABOUT GOING TO THE STUPID GIFTING SUITE WITH MATT? 180 00:07:30,542 --> 00:07:34,166 - I HAVE TO GET THERE BEFORE THE GOOD STUFF'S GONE. 181 00:07:34,166 --> 00:07:35,917 I SAY WE BREAK FOR LUNCH. 182 00:07:35,917 --> 00:07:38,375 - REALLY? 183 00:07:38,375 --> 00:07:40,041 - APPARENTLY, WE'VE ALREADY BROKEN. 184 00:07:40,041 --> 00:07:41,792 - OKAY, THAT'S LUNCH, EVERYBODY. 185 00:07:41,792 --> 00:07:44,166 [bell ringing] 186 00:07:44,166 --> 00:07:45,125 - WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? 187 00:07:45,125 --> 00:07:46,583 GO CHANGE. GO. GO. 188 00:07:46,583 --> 00:07:49,625 - OKAY, YOU ARE GONNA HAVE TO TRY AND CALM DOWN. 189 00:07:49,625 --> 00:07:51,208 - THIS IS ME TRYING. 190 00:07:51,208 --> 00:07:54,000 GO! 191 00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:55,291 - OH, THERE'S TIM. 192 00:07:55,291 --> 00:07:58,250 - OH, SHIT. - TIM! 193 00:07:58,250 --> 00:07:59,959 - WHAT ABOUT "OH, SHIT" MADE YOU THINK 194 00:07:59,959 --> 00:08:02,166 I WANTED HIM OVER HERE? 195 00:08:02,166 --> 00:08:04,583 IT'S TIM. - HELLO, YOU. 196 00:08:04,583 --> 00:08:05,959 [chuckles] OH. 197 00:08:05,959 --> 00:08:07,125 AND YOU. [laughs] 198 00:08:07,125 --> 00:08:08,250 - OH, GREAT TO SEE YOU. 199 00:08:08,250 --> 00:08:11,041 - AH. LOOK AT YOU TWO MOGULS. 200 00:08:11,041 --> 00:08:12,667 - HARDLY. [chuckles] 201 00:08:12,667 --> 00:08:14,583 - I LOVED THIS ONE'S EMAIL-- "MEET ME AT THE STAGE. 202 00:08:14,583 --> 00:08:17,291 WE'LL GRAB A BITE AT THE COMMISSARY." 203 00:08:17,291 --> 00:08:20,291 IT'S LIKE SOMETHING OUT OF SUNSET BOULEVARD. 204 00:08:20,291 --> 00:08:22,166 - AND YET MOST OF THE TIME, WE FEEL LIKE 205 00:08:22,166 --> 00:08:23,750 WILLIAM HOLDEN FLOATING IN THE POOL. 206 00:08:23,750 --> 00:08:25,500 - [laughs] 207 00:08:25,500 --> 00:08:27,291 - ANYWAY, SO NICE TO SEE YOU. 208 00:08:27,291 --> 00:08:28,500 - OH, WHAT? YOU'RE NOT JOINING US? 209 00:08:28,500 --> 00:08:30,000 - OH, I WISH I COULD. 210 00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:32,333 UNFORTUNATELY, I HAVE THIS THING WITH MATT LEBLANC. 211 00:08:32,333 --> 00:08:33,333 MM. 212 00:08:33,333 --> 00:08:37,291 - OH, NO. 213 00:08:40,750 --> 00:08:43,375 [keys clacking] 214 00:08:46,959 --> 00:08:50,250 - WAIT. HANG ON. 215 00:08:50,250 --> 00:08:51,792 EVERYTHING IN THIS ROOM IS FREE? 216 00:08:51,792 --> 00:08:53,542 - ROOMS. 217 00:08:53,542 --> 00:08:55,917 THIS IS JUST THE FIRST ONE. 218 00:08:55,917 --> 00:08:57,959 - OH, MY GOD. 219 00:08:57,959 --> 00:09:01,375 IT'S LIKE WHEN THE WIZARD OF OZ TURNS TO COLOR. 220 00:09:04,166 --> 00:09:05,875 - HEY. MATT LEBLANC. 221 00:09:05,875 --> 00:09:07,625 BETH VENNICK PUT US ON THE LIST. 222 00:09:07,625 --> 00:09:10,333 - ABSOLUTELY. WELCOME. 223 00:09:10,333 --> 00:09:11,542 - NOW WHAT? 224 00:09:11,542 --> 00:09:13,417 - UH, WELL, NOW WE GO AROUND, 225 00:09:13,417 --> 00:09:16,917 AND THEY GIVE US STUFF. 226 00:09:16,917 --> 00:09:19,333 - BY THE WAY, THIS IS VERY SIMILAR 227 00:09:19,333 --> 00:09:21,333 TO THINGS I'VE MADE UP IN MY HEAD. 228 00:09:21,333 --> 00:09:23,917 [chuckles] 229 00:09:23,917 --> 00:09:24,875 - OKAY. 230 00:09:24,875 --> 00:09:26,709 - SORRY. SORRY. 231 00:09:26,709 --> 00:09:28,458 - VIVE-8 IS AN ALL-NATURAL ENERGY DRINK. 232 00:09:28,458 --> 00:09:31,000 IT'S PACKED WITH EIGHT HERBS AND VITAMINS 233 00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:32,458 AND ANTIOXIDANTS-- 234 00:09:32,458 --> 00:09:34,458 NO SUGAR, NO CAFFEINE. 235 00:09:34,458 --> 00:09:36,500 THE BOOST COMES FROM THINGS LIKE 236 00:09:36,500 --> 00:09:38,917 GINSENG, GUARANA, ASTRAGALUS ROOT. 237 00:09:38,917 --> 00:09:40,041 - MMM. 238 00:09:40,041 --> 00:09:42,250 TASTES LIKE PLAGUE. 239 00:09:42,250 --> 00:09:43,875 - WOULD YOU LIKE A FEW CANS? 240 00:09:43,875 --> 00:09:45,375 - ABSOLUTELY. 241 00:09:45,375 --> 00:09:46,917 IT'S FREE. 242 00:09:46,917 --> 00:09:49,375 - MATT, DO YOU MIND IF WE GET A SHOT OF YOU 243 00:09:49,375 --> 00:09:53,250 MAYBE HOLDING THE VIVE-8? 244 00:09:53,250 --> 00:09:54,667 - NOTHING'S FREE. 245 00:09:54,667 --> 00:09:56,166 [keys clacking] 246 00:09:56,166 --> 00:10:00,458 I'M JUST SAYING, TRY TO BE A LITTLE SELECTIVE. 247 00:10:00,458 --> 00:10:02,375 HEY, EYES HERE. 248 00:10:02,375 --> 00:10:04,125 'CAUSE WHATEVER YOU TAKE, I GOT TO DO A PICTURE, 249 00:10:04,125 --> 00:10:05,500 AND THEN IT SHOWS UP ON THEIR WEBSITE, 250 00:10:05,500 --> 00:10:07,834 AND SUDDENLY, I'M ENDORSING THEIR SHIT. 251 00:10:07,834 --> 00:10:11,083 SO ALL I'M ASKING IS THAT YOU DON'T TAKE EVERYTHING. 252 00:10:11,083 --> 00:10:14,250 - OOH, PEANUT BRITTLE. 253 00:10:14,250 --> 00:10:16,583 - SO TELL ME, HOW ARE YOU? WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN UP TO? 254 00:10:16,583 --> 00:10:18,750 - OH, I'M OUT HERE TRYING TO GET MEETINGS 255 00:10:18,750 --> 00:10:20,625 AND, OF COURSE, NOT GETTING MEETINGS. 256 00:10:20,625 --> 00:10:22,250 EH, I'VE GOT THIS SCRIPT. 257 00:10:22,250 --> 00:10:24,500 I CAN'T EVEN GET ANYONE TO READ IT TO REJECT IT. 258 00:10:24,500 --> 00:10:27,125 - I KNOW. IT'S A HORRIBLE, STUPID TOWN. 259 00:10:27,125 --> 00:10:29,041 - SAID THE MAN WITH TWO TV SHOWS. 260 00:10:29,041 --> 00:10:30,625 - RIGHT, OKAY, FIRST OF ALL, 261 00:10:30,625 --> 00:10:32,834 PUCKS! HAS BEEN A BLOODY NIGHTMARE. 262 00:10:32,834 --> 00:10:34,375 - AW. - NO, NO, SERIOUSLY-- 263 00:10:34,375 --> 00:10:36,875 FROM START TO FINISH, A FUCKING DISASTER. 264 00:10:36,875 --> 00:10:37,959 - OH, POPPET. 265 00:10:37,959 --> 00:10:39,291 DO I LOOK LIKE I FEEL SORRY FOR YOU? 266 00:10:39,291 --> 00:10:40,792 'CAUSE I'M TRYING SO VERY HARD. 267 00:10:40,792 --> 00:10:41,709 - PRICK. 268 00:10:41,709 --> 00:10:43,166 - WHAT? YOU WANT SYMPATHY? 269 00:10:43,166 --> 00:10:45,291 YOUR PICTURE'S ON THE FRONT OF VARIETY, 270 00:10:45,291 --> 00:10:47,208 WHICH WAS VERY EXCITING, BY THE WAY. 271 00:10:47,208 --> 00:10:49,333 - WELL... - WHEN I READ THE THING, 272 00:10:49,333 --> 00:10:52,291 I WAS LIKE, "OH, MY GOD. 273 00:10:52,291 --> 00:10:54,208 THEY'RE MAKING OUR SHOW." 274 00:10:54,208 --> 00:10:56,166 - I'M SORRY. WHAT? - OUR SHOW. 275 00:10:56,166 --> 00:10:58,208 YOU--YOU FINALLY GOT IT ON. 276 00:10:58,208 --> 00:10:59,959 - OH! NO. NO. 277 00:10:59,959 --> 00:11:01,750 ACTUALLY, THE SHOW BEV AND I ARE DOING 278 00:11:01,750 --> 00:11:03,166 IS VASTLY DIFFERENT FROM THAT THING 279 00:11:03,166 --> 00:11:04,333 YOU AND I KICKED AROUND. 280 00:11:04,333 --> 00:11:05,500 - WELL, THAT'S NOT TRUE. 281 00:11:05,500 --> 00:11:07,750 - NO, NO. IT ABSOLUTELY IS. 282 00:11:07,750 --> 00:11:10,291 THE OPPOSITE OF US BEARS NO RESEMBLANCE TO-- 283 00:11:10,291 --> 00:11:12,333 I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER THE NAME OF THE THING-- 284 00:11:12,333 --> 00:11:14,125 - WE'RE NOT THEM. 285 00:11:14,125 --> 00:11:15,750 - RIGHT. 286 00:11:15,750 --> 00:11:18,083 - I MEAN, THEY'RE BOTH ABOUT TWO FAMILIES. 287 00:11:18,083 --> 00:11:19,667 - WELL... 288 00:11:19,667 --> 00:11:21,291 - THEY'VE BOTH GOT THE SAME CAST PLAYING TWO PARTS. 289 00:11:21,291 --> 00:11:24,291 - RIGHT, BUT THE SPECIFIC CHARACTERS, 290 00:11:24,291 --> 00:11:26,041 THE STORY, THE SCENES-- 291 00:11:26,041 --> 00:11:27,834 BELIEVE ME, IF YOU'D READ IT, YOU'D REALIZE-- 292 00:11:27,834 --> 00:11:29,792 - OH, I'VE READ IT. - YOU'VE READ IT? 293 00:11:29,792 --> 00:11:31,458 - I GOT A COPY FROM STANLEY RICHARDSON. 294 00:11:31,458 --> 00:11:33,250 HE'S STILL MY AGENT TOO, YOU KNOW. 295 00:11:33,250 --> 00:11:35,083 GOD, HE'S USELESS. 296 00:11:35,083 --> 00:11:37,166 - BUT HE GAVE YOU OUR SCRIPT? 297 00:11:37,166 --> 00:11:40,333 - RIGHT, SO NOT COMPLETELY USELESS. 298 00:11:40,333 --> 00:11:42,667 YEAH. [chuckles] 299 00:11:44,166 --> 00:11:46,166 - JEAN LUC IS BASED IN PARIS. 300 00:11:46,166 --> 00:11:48,500 ALL HIS PIECES ARE HAND-STITCHED. 301 00:11:48,500 --> 00:11:51,333 HE'S DESIGNED FOR SHARON STONE, 302 00:11:51,333 --> 00:11:53,375 FOR JENNIFER LAWRENCE. 303 00:11:53,375 --> 00:11:55,417 - AND I CAN JUST TAKE THIS? 304 00:11:55,417 --> 00:11:57,875 - OR WE CAN SHIP IT TO YOU. 305 00:11:57,875 --> 00:11:59,709 - [chuckles] 306 00:11:59,709 --> 00:12:02,291 SUDDENLY, ALL THE CRAP YOU'VE PUT US THROUGH 307 00:12:02,291 --> 00:12:04,875 IS TOTALLY WORTH IT. [chuckles] 308 00:12:04,875 --> 00:12:06,709 [keys clacking] 309 00:12:06,709 --> 00:12:09,625 - OUR ARTISANAL SALSAS ARE ALL HANDCRAFTED 310 00:12:09,625 --> 00:12:11,333 FROM NATURAL, ORGANIC INGREDIENTS. 311 00:12:11,333 --> 00:12:12,709 WOULD YOU LIKE A JAR? 312 00:12:12,709 --> 00:12:15,000 - SERIOUSLY, A JAR? [chuckles] 313 00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:17,458 SHE'S GIVING OUT LEATHER JACKETS. 314 00:12:17,458 --> 00:12:20,417 [keys clacking] 315 00:12:26,333 --> 00:12:28,375 - KITTY LITTER? REALLY? 316 00:12:28,375 --> 00:12:29,959 - IT'S ORGANIC. 317 00:12:29,959 --> 00:12:32,458 - YOU DON'T HAVE A FUCKING CAT. 318 00:12:32,458 --> 00:12:34,917 - SO HOW DOES BEV FEEL ABOUT DOING OUR PROJECT? 319 00:12:34,917 --> 00:12:37,041 THAT'S GOT TO BE A BIT AWKWARD FOR HER. 320 00:12:37,041 --> 00:12:39,667 - SHE DOESN'T FEEL ANYTHING, BECAUSE WE HAVEN'T DISCUSSED IT, 321 00:12:39,667 --> 00:12:44,667 BECAUSE, NO OFFENSE, IT'S NOT THE SAME SHOW. 322 00:12:44,667 --> 00:12:46,667 - AND YET IT IS. 323 00:12:46,667 --> 00:12:47,875 I'M STEALING ONE OF YOUR CHIPS. 324 00:12:47,875 --> 00:12:50,542 HMM, SEEMS ONLY FAIR. HA! 325 00:12:50,542 --> 00:12:52,917 - LOOK, WE'RE JUST GONNA HAVE TO AGREE TO DISAGREE. 326 00:12:52,917 --> 00:12:55,667 CLEARLY, MY RECOLLECTION OF IT IS VERY DIFFERENT FROM YOURS. 327 00:12:55,667 --> 00:12:57,917 AND IT'S NOT EVEN LIKE THERE'S A SCRIPT 328 00:12:57,917 --> 00:12:59,291 WE CAN TURN TO OR-- 329 00:12:59,291 --> 00:13:03,250 - THERE'S THE NOTES. - THE NOTES? 330 00:13:03,250 --> 00:13:05,583 - OUR NOTES. 331 00:13:06,792 --> 00:13:09,166 AND THE WORDS "I'LL DO THE TYPING" 332 00:13:09,166 --> 00:13:11,834 FINALLY PAY OFF. 333 00:13:11,834 --> 00:13:13,750 - RIGHT, OBVIOUSLY, I HAVEN'T SEEN THESE, 334 00:13:13,750 --> 00:13:17,083 BUT I CAN TELL YOU RIGHT NOW THERE ARE HUGE DIFFERENCES. 335 00:13:17,083 --> 00:13:19,250 - AND YET MY LAWYERS KEEP BANGING ON 336 00:13:19,250 --> 00:13:20,625 ABOUT THE SIMILARITIES. 337 00:13:20,625 --> 00:13:22,083 - YOUR LAWYERS? 338 00:13:22,083 --> 00:13:23,542 - THEY'RE VERY EXCITED ABOUT THIS. 339 00:13:23,542 --> 00:13:25,667 AND I'M LIKE, "OKAY, CALM DOWN. 340 00:13:25,667 --> 00:13:26,959 "THESE ARE OLD FRIENDS. 341 00:13:26,959 --> 00:13:29,125 "THEY WOULDN'T TRY AND SCREW ME. 342 00:13:29,125 --> 00:13:31,125 THEY'RE NOT STUPID." 343 00:13:31,125 --> 00:13:33,792 AH, FUCK IT. I'M TAKING ALL OF THESE. 344 00:13:36,375 --> 00:13:39,834 - I WANT TO STAY HERE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE. 345 00:13:39,834 --> 00:13:42,250 - WELL, THEN HURRY UP AND DIE, 'CAUSE I'M READY TO GO. 346 00:13:42,250 --> 00:13:45,291 [cell phone playing tune] 347 00:13:49,125 --> 00:13:51,291 HEY. - ARE YOU FUCKING NUTS? 348 00:13:51,291 --> 00:13:52,792 - PROBABLY. WHAT? 349 00:13:52,792 --> 00:13:55,583 - YOU TAUGHT THEM TO DRAW A VAGINA? 350 00:13:55,583 --> 00:13:58,333 - CALM DOWN. IT'S JUST A VAGINA. 351 00:13:58,333 --> 00:13:59,834 HOW ARE YA? 352 00:13:59,834 --> 00:14:02,250 - THEY'RE CHILDREN. - THEY'RE FINE. 353 00:14:02,250 --> 00:14:03,375 - THEY'RE NOT FINE. 354 00:14:03,375 --> 00:14:06,333 - SERIOUSLY, RELAX. - YOU RELAX. 355 00:14:06,333 --> 00:14:08,208 YOU'RE NOT THE ONE WHO'S GONNA GET THE CALLS 356 00:14:08,208 --> 00:14:10,333 FROM THE OTHER MOTHERS WHEN THEIR KIDS COME HOME-- 357 00:14:10,333 --> 00:14:11,667 - OH, CHRIST. - WHAT? 358 00:14:11,667 --> 00:14:13,834 - I GOT TO CALL YOU BACK. - WHERE ARE YOU? 359 00:14:13,834 --> 00:14:16,000 - AT THIS STUPID GIFTING-SUITE THING. 360 00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:17,125 I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER. 361 00:14:17,125 --> 00:14:18,542 - DO NOT HANG-- [dial tone] 362 00:14:18,542 --> 00:14:20,625 - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? THAT'S HERS. 363 00:14:20,625 --> 00:14:23,000 - IT WAS ON THE TABLE. 364 00:14:26,458 --> 00:14:28,834 - I BELIEVE THAT'S YOURS. 365 00:14:28,834 --> 00:14:30,834 - MM. 366 00:14:30,834 --> 00:14:32,125 - JESUS FUCK. 367 00:14:32,125 --> 00:14:34,333 - YOU OWE ME A HANDBAG. 368 00:14:34,333 --> 00:14:37,000 [keys clacking] 369 00:14:39,291 --> 00:14:41,542 - AH! THERE THEY ARE. 370 00:14:41,542 --> 00:14:43,667 COME HERE. 371 00:14:43,667 --> 00:14:47,542 OH, LOOK AT YOU-- MY TWO FAVORITE GIRLS. 372 00:14:47,542 --> 00:14:49,333 I INVENTED THESE TWO. - MM... 373 00:14:49,333 --> 00:14:50,625 - OKAY. [laughter] 374 00:14:50,625 --> 00:14:52,834 HELEN BASCH, CAROL RANCE, MEET... 375 00:14:52,834 --> 00:14:54,625 - ARJEN VAN DER LINDEN. - LINDEN. YES. 376 00:14:54,625 --> 00:14:55,709 - WELCOME. - THANK YOU. 377 00:14:55,709 --> 00:14:57,083 - NICE TO MEET YOU. 378 00:14:57,083 --> 00:14:58,542 - THIS GUY IS A GENIUS. 379 00:14:58,542 --> 00:15:00,500 - WELL... - NO, NO, NO. NOT "WELL." 380 00:15:00,500 --> 00:15:03,041 HE HAS THE NUMBER-ONE SHOW IN HOLLAND. 381 00:15:03,041 --> 00:15:04,834 YOU SHOULD SEE. 382 00:15:04,834 --> 00:15:06,750 THE WHOLE COUNTRY SHUTS DOWN WEDNESDAY NIGHTS. 383 00:15:06,750 --> 00:15:09,208 RESTAURANTS CLOSE. STREETS ARE DESERTED. 384 00:15:09,208 --> 00:15:11,041 YOU CAN'T HEAR A WOODEN SHOE. 385 00:15:11,041 --> 00:15:12,000 [laughter] 386 00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:13,208 - WELL, COME ON IN. TELL US. 387 00:15:13,208 --> 00:15:15,000 SIT, SIT. 388 00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:18,750 - SHOULD I JUST DIVE IN? 389 00:15:18,750 --> 00:15:20,250 I'M DIVING IN. - YEP. 390 00:15:20,250 --> 00:15:22,917 - OKAY, THE TITLE LITERALLY TRANSLATES AS, 391 00:15:22,917 --> 00:15:25,583 THIS IS ME AND THE BOX I AM IN, 392 00:15:25,583 --> 00:15:27,417 WHICH, OBVIOUSLY, WE'LL CHANGE. 393 00:15:27,417 --> 00:15:28,709 IT'S NOT EXACTLY GRIPPING. 394 00:15:28,709 --> 00:15:30,875 BUT TITLES, SCHMITLES. 395 00:15:30,875 --> 00:15:33,583 THE SHOW IS FANTASTIC. 396 00:15:33,583 --> 00:15:35,625 THESE DUTCH FUCKS ARE SO BRILLIANT AT THIS. 397 00:15:35,625 --> 00:15:37,417 IT'S LIKE SURVIVOR MEETS BIG BROTHER 398 00:15:37,417 --> 00:15:41,000 MEETS MILLIONAIRE MEETS... SURVIVOR AGAIN. 399 00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:42,417 - WOW. - OKAY. 400 00:15:42,417 --> 00:15:44,583 IT STARTS WITH, LIKE, 12 PEOPLE. 401 00:15:44,583 --> 00:15:45,917 - SIX PEOPLE. YEAH. 402 00:15:45,917 --> 00:15:47,208 - SIX PEOPLE. 403 00:15:47,208 --> 00:15:49,208 AND THEY'RE ALL IN THESE BOXES. 404 00:15:49,208 --> 00:15:51,917 - WELL, THEY DON'T START IN THE BOXES. THEY, UH-- 405 00:15:51,917 --> 00:15:53,291 - OH. OH, RIGHT. RIGHT, RIGHT, RIGHT. 406 00:15:53,291 --> 00:15:54,625 NO, THEY'RE NOT IN THE BOXES YET. 407 00:15:54,625 --> 00:15:57,291 THEY START... - IN THE CHAIRS. 408 00:15:57,291 --> 00:15:58,834 - IN THE CHAIRS. [laughs] 409 00:15:58,834 --> 00:16:00,792 AND THEY'RE LOWERED INTO THE BOXES. 410 00:16:00,792 --> 00:16:02,959 - WHEN YOU SAY BOXES... 411 00:16:02,959 --> 00:16:04,583 - YEAH, YEAH, THEY'RE LIKE THESE CELLS 412 00:16:04,583 --> 00:16:05,917 WITH NOTHING IN THEM. 413 00:16:05,917 --> 00:16:07,291 AND THE PEOPLE IN THE BOXES 414 00:16:07,291 --> 00:16:08,625 HAVE TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS, 415 00:16:08,625 --> 00:16:09,834 AND THEY GET POINTS. 416 00:16:09,834 --> 00:16:11,959 - NOT POINTS. - OKAY, NOT POINTS. 417 00:16:11,959 --> 00:16:13,917 BUT THEY'RE LIKE POINTS. - EH... 418 00:16:13,917 --> 00:16:15,458 - LET'S CALL THEM POINTS. - OKAY. 419 00:16:15,458 --> 00:16:17,959 - YEAH. TO BUY, LIKE, BASIC NECESSITIES, 420 00:16:17,959 --> 00:16:20,834 LIKE A BLANKET OR SHOES OR A PIECE OF FRUIT. 421 00:16:20,834 --> 00:16:22,625 - WELL, FRUIT IS LATER. IT'S... 422 00:16:22,625 --> 00:16:25,417 - [sighs] FRUIT IS LATER. 423 00:16:25,417 --> 00:16:28,208 [chuckles] BUT SAY A PILLOW OR TOILET PAPER. 424 00:16:28,208 --> 00:16:30,792 - THEY DON'T HAVE TOILET PAPER? - THEY HAVE TOILET PAPER. 425 00:16:30,792 --> 00:16:32,625 - ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, THEY HAVE TOILET PAPER. 426 00:16:32,625 --> 00:16:34,542 LET'S NOT GET BOGGED DOWN. 427 00:16:34,542 --> 00:16:37,792 THE IDEA IS, THEY'RE BUYING THESE BASIC HUMAN NECESSITIES, 428 00:16:37,792 --> 00:16:39,250 WITH THE EXCEPTION OF TOILET PAPER... 429 00:16:39,250 --> 00:16:41,041 [chuckles] WHICH THEY ALREADY HAVE. 430 00:16:41,041 --> 00:16:43,000 - WELL, THEY DO. YEAH. 431 00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:44,458 - OKAY. 432 00:16:44,458 --> 00:16:46,542 - OR-- AND THIS IS THE PART I LOVE-- 433 00:16:46,542 --> 00:16:47,750 [laughs] 434 00:16:47,750 --> 00:16:49,083 THEY CAN SPEND THEIR POINTS 435 00:16:49,083 --> 00:16:52,000 TO DO SHIT TO THE PEOPLE IN THE OTHER BOXES. 436 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:54,625 THEY CAN MAKE SOMEONE ELSE'S BOX COLDER OR HOTTER 437 00:16:54,625 --> 00:16:55,750 OR FILL IT WITH BUGS. 438 00:16:55,750 --> 00:16:56,959 - REALLY? BUGS? - OH, YEAH, YEAH. 439 00:16:56,959 --> 00:16:58,834 THAT'S A VERY BIG PART OF IT. 440 00:16:58,834 --> 00:17:00,417 THEY YELL, "RELEASE THE BUGS!" 441 00:17:00,417 --> 00:17:03,208 AND THE AUDIENCE YELLS, "RELEASE THE BUGS!" 442 00:17:03,208 --> 00:17:04,917 - [shouting in Dutch] 443 00:17:04,917 --> 00:17:07,667 - THESE FUCKING BUGS COME POURING IN. 444 00:17:07,667 --> 00:17:10,125 IT'S LIKE FEAR FACTOR. YOU REMEMBER FEAR FACTOR? 445 00:17:10,125 --> 00:17:12,959 IT'S LIKE THAT, BUT CLASSY. 446 00:17:12,959 --> 00:17:15,500 - WELL, OF COURSE. THEY'VE GOT TOILET PAPER. 447 00:17:15,500 --> 00:17:17,291 - EXACTLY. 448 00:17:17,291 --> 00:17:18,458 [laughter] 449 00:17:18,458 --> 00:17:22,208 - SO HOW LONG ARE THEY IN THESE BOXES? 450 00:17:22,208 --> 00:17:23,625 - WELL, THE WHOLE SEASON. 451 00:17:23,625 --> 00:17:26,583 - JESUS. [laughs] 452 00:17:26,583 --> 00:17:27,792 HOW DOES IT END? 453 00:17:27,792 --> 00:17:28,917 - THEY VOTE EACH OTHER OUT. - NO. 454 00:17:28,917 --> 00:17:30,375 - NO, NO, NO. THE AUDIENCE VOTES. 455 00:17:30,375 --> 00:17:31,542 - NO. - I DON'T KNOW. 456 00:17:31,542 --> 00:17:33,041 IT EVENTUALLY ENDS. 457 00:17:33,041 --> 00:17:35,750 LOOK, WE DON'T HAVE TO DO IT LIKE THEY DID IT. 458 00:17:35,750 --> 00:17:37,333 IT'S FUCKING HOLLAND. 459 00:17:39,291 --> 00:17:41,125 - HEY. - OH. 460 00:17:41,125 --> 00:17:42,333 NOW YOU CAN TALK? 461 00:17:42,333 --> 00:17:44,291 - I COME BEARING GIFTS. 462 00:17:44,291 --> 00:17:46,959 - YOU COME BEARING CRAP. - NOT ALL OF IT'S CRAP. 463 00:17:46,959 --> 00:17:48,458 - KITTY LITTER? 464 00:17:48,458 --> 00:17:49,875 - OKAY, SOME OF IT'S CRAP. 465 00:17:49,875 --> 00:17:52,583 - HANG ON. I WANT YOU TO SEE SOMETHING. 466 00:17:52,583 --> 00:17:55,709 YOUR SON DREW THIS IN ART CLASS. 467 00:17:55,709 --> 00:17:58,834 - HOLY SHIT. LOOK AT THAT. 468 00:17:58,834 --> 00:18:00,834 - IT'S A VAGINA. - I KNOW. 469 00:18:00,834 --> 00:18:03,792 - HE DREW A VAGINA. 470 00:18:03,792 --> 00:18:05,250 - OH, CALM DOWN. 471 00:18:05,250 --> 00:18:06,834 IT'S NOT LIKE THERE'S A DICK IN IT. 472 00:18:06,834 --> 00:18:08,041 - THEY CALLED ME FROM SCHOOL. 473 00:18:08,041 --> 00:18:09,333 - I'LL BET THEY DID. 474 00:18:09,333 --> 00:18:11,583 THIS IS VERY IMPRESSIVE. 475 00:18:11,583 --> 00:18:13,667 - HOW DO YOU NOT GET-- - I GET IT. 476 00:18:13,667 --> 00:18:14,834 BUT, JESUS, LOOK AT THIS. 477 00:18:14,834 --> 00:18:16,291 THE WAY HE DREW THE LEGS-- 478 00:18:16,291 --> 00:18:19,500 IT'S GOT PERSPECTIVE. IT'S GOT DETAIL. 479 00:18:19,500 --> 00:18:20,917 - IT'S GOT PUBES. - YEAH. 480 00:18:20,917 --> 00:18:22,583 - HE'S EIGHT. - I KNOW. 481 00:18:22,583 --> 00:18:25,583 WHEN I WAS EIGHT, I COULDN'T DRAW A HOUSE WITH CLOUDS. 482 00:18:25,583 --> 00:18:27,625 HE'S TALENTED. 483 00:18:27,625 --> 00:18:28,834 - ARE YOU FUCKING WITH ME? 484 00:18:28,834 --> 00:18:29,917 - NO. 485 00:18:29,917 --> 00:18:31,959 TRY TO GET PAST THE PUSSY PART. 486 00:18:31,959 --> 00:18:33,291 - THERE'S NOTHING PAST THE PUSSY PART. 487 00:18:33,291 --> 00:18:35,875 - YEAH, THERE IS. LOOK AT THE EXECUTION. 488 00:18:35,875 --> 00:18:39,083 JUST LOOK AT IT. 489 00:18:42,250 --> 00:18:44,208 YOU GOT TO ADMIT... 490 00:18:44,208 --> 00:18:47,166 - ALL RIGHT, I KIND OF SEE-- - THAT'S ALL I'M SAYING. 491 00:18:47,166 --> 00:18:48,709 - STILL, YOU'RE HIS FATHER. 492 00:18:48,709 --> 00:18:50,125 YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO TEACH HIM SHIT LIKE THIS. 493 00:18:50,125 --> 00:18:51,667 - HEY, I CANNOT TAKE CREDIT FOR THIS. 494 00:18:51,667 --> 00:18:53,458 THAT THING I DREW WAS LIKE A STICK FIGURE. 495 00:18:53,458 --> 00:18:55,291 THIS... 496 00:18:55,291 --> 00:18:56,500 IS A GIFT. 497 00:19:00,959 --> 00:19:02,375 - YOU'RE NOT PUTTING IT ON YOUR FRIDGE. 498 00:19:02,375 --> 00:19:04,125 - I AM SO PUTTING IT ON MY FRIDGE. 499 00:19:04,125 --> 00:19:06,083 - [groans] 500 00:19:06,083 --> 00:19:08,250 - SO WONDERFUL TO SEE YOU. 501 00:19:08,250 --> 00:19:10,875 NOBODY PITCHES LIKE YOU DO. 502 00:19:10,875 --> 00:19:13,458 - YOU REALLY BROUGHT YOUR "A" GAME. 503 00:19:13,458 --> 00:19:15,000 - AH, THIS THING PITCHES ITSELF. 504 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:16,709 I'M TELLING YOU, IT'S GONNA BE BIGGER HERE 505 00:19:16,709 --> 00:19:18,208 THAN IT IS OVER THERE. 506 00:19:18,208 --> 00:19:20,291 - STOP SELLING. WE BOUGHT IT. [laughter] 507 00:19:20,291 --> 00:19:23,125 ARJEN, SO NICE TO MEET YOU. WE'RE REALLY EXCITED ABOUT THIS. 508 00:19:23,125 --> 00:19:24,625 - THANK YOU. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 509 00:19:24,625 --> 00:19:25,959 - DIDN'T I TELL YOU? 510 00:19:25,959 --> 00:19:27,875 - HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND, YOU TWO. - THANKS. 511 00:19:27,875 --> 00:19:28,834 - HEY, GET THE ELEVATOR. 512 00:19:28,834 --> 00:19:30,667 I'LL BE RIGHT WITH YOU. - SURE. 513 00:19:30,667 --> 00:19:33,166 - WHAT DID YOU CALL HIM? - WHO? ARJEN? 514 00:19:33,166 --> 00:19:35,417 - ARJEN. ARJEN. 515 00:19:35,417 --> 00:19:37,542 ARJEN, WAIT UP! 516 00:19:40,792 --> 00:19:43,792 [both laughing] - OH, MY GOD. 517 00:19:43,792 --> 00:19:45,166 WHAT DID WE JUST BUY? 518 00:19:45,166 --> 00:19:47,000 - I HAVE NO IDEA. 519 00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:48,709 - WELL, WE DID A GOOD THING. 520 00:19:48,709 --> 00:19:50,083 [intercom beeps] PATTY? 521 00:19:50,083 --> 00:19:51,959 TELL ME I HAVE NOTHING ELSE TODAY. 522 00:19:51,959 --> 00:19:53,792 - YOU HAVE NOTHING ELSE TODAY. 523 00:19:53,792 --> 00:19:55,458 - I LOVE YOU. SEE YOU MONDAY. 524 00:19:55,458 --> 00:19:57,417 - YOU SURE? - YES. GO HOME. 525 00:19:57,417 --> 00:19:58,834 HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND. 526 00:19:58,834 --> 00:19:59,959 [sighs] 527 00:19:59,959 --> 00:20:02,458 ALL IN ALL, NOT A BAD FIRST WEEK. 528 00:20:02,458 --> 00:20:03,875 - NOT BAD? 529 00:20:03,875 --> 00:20:06,667 WE'VE GOT THE NUMBER-ONE SHOW IN HOLLAND. 530 00:20:06,667 --> 00:20:09,000 IN HOLLAND. [laughs] 531 00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:11,375 - WELL, THE BEST PART IS, WE'RE DONE. 532 00:20:11,375 --> 00:20:14,500 - MM. - SO HERE'S A QUESTION. 533 00:20:15,709 --> 00:20:19,375 DO YOU EVER GET HIGH? 534 00:20:19,375 --> 00:20:22,291 - ONCE IN A WHILE. 535 00:20:22,291 --> 00:20:23,792 [perfume spraying] 536 00:20:23,792 --> 00:20:24,959 - OH, THESE ARE KIND OF COOL. 537 00:20:24,959 --> 00:20:26,875 THEY LIGHT UP WHEN YOU WALK. 538 00:20:26,875 --> 00:20:30,208 - YEAH, THAT'S WHAT I NEED-- FLIP-FLOPS I HAVE TO RECHARGE. 539 00:20:30,208 --> 00:20:33,875 - I'LL TAKE 'EM. 540 00:20:33,875 --> 00:20:36,792 - JESUS, LOOK AT THIS. 541 00:20:36,792 --> 00:20:39,000 WHO THE HELL WOULD WEAR A RUBBER DRESS? 542 00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:42,291 - UH, THE GIRL IN THIS PICTURE? 543 00:20:42,291 --> 00:20:44,542 OH, HERE WE GO. YOU'RE GONNA LIKE THIS. 544 00:20:44,542 --> 00:20:46,834 ♪ BA-DA BA-BA-DA BA-BA-DA BA-BA ♪ 545 00:20:46,834 --> 00:20:49,250 - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? - WHAT? 546 00:20:49,250 --> 00:20:50,667 - I HAVEN'T HAD A DRINK IN THREE MONTHS. 547 00:20:50,667 --> 00:20:52,917 - I KNOW. WE SHOULD CELEBRATE THAT. 548 00:20:52,917 --> 00:20:55,125 - [sighs] YOU'RE SUCH A SHIT. 549 00:20:55,125 --> 00:20:57,250 - ONCE IN A WHILE'S NOT GONNA KILL YOU. 550 00:20:57,250 --> 00:20:59,166 - IS THAT THE 13TH STEP? 551 00:20:59,166 --> 00:21:00,583 - I DON'T KNOW. I NEVER GOT PAST TWO. 552 00:21:00,583 --> 00:21:02,667 [chuckles] YOU GOT ANY LIMES? 553 00:21:02,667 --> 00:21:04,208 - [groans] 554 00:21:07,083 --> 00:21:08,083 - WHAT DO YOU THINK? - NICE. 555 00:21:08,083 --> 00:21:10,458 - [inhales excitedly] - YEAH. 556 00:21:10,458 --> 00:21:11,542 - WHAT? 557 00:21:11,542 --> 00:21:13,125 - IS THAT A SCRATCH ACROSS THE LENS? 558 00:21:13,125 --> 00:21:14,542 - THEY WERE THE LAST PAIR. 559 00:21:14,542 --> 00:21:17,166 BUT FREE! - RIGHT. 560 00:21:17,166 --> 00:21:18,917 BUT CAN YOU SEE? 561 00:21:18,917 --> 00:21:22,166 - NOT REALLY, BUT YOU'RE TOTALLY MISSING THE POINT. 562 00:21:22,166 --> 00:21:24,291 - OF GLASSES? 563 00:21:24,291 --> 00:21:26,458 - SO HOW WAS YOUR LUNCH WITH TIM? 564 00:21:26,458 --> 00:21:29,291 OH, AND BY THE WAY, YOU HEARD THE "OH, NO" THING. 565 00:21:29,291 --> 00:21:30,750 - I DID. - THANK YOU. 566 00:21:30,750 --> 00:21:32,166 WANKER. 567 00:21:32,166 --> 00:21:33,375 - AH. 568 00:21:33,375 --> 00:21:37,417 UM, WELL, OKAY, LUNCH. UH... 569 00:21:37,417 --> 00:21:40,333 LET ME START BY SAYING THERE IS NO CAUSE FOR ALARM. 570 00:21:47,625 --> 00:21:49,959 - THIS IS FUCKING GREAT. 571 00:21:49,959 --> 00:21:51,917 IS IT MEDICAL? - MM. 572 00:21:51,917 --> 00:21:54,709 MY SON GROWS IT. - AW. 573 00:21:54,709 --> 00:21:55,959 I WANT CHILDREN. 574 00:21:55,959 --> 00:21:57,792 - [laughs] [knock at door] 575 00:21:57,792 --> 00:21:59,667 YEAH? - IT'S MYRA. 576 00:21:59,667 --> 00:22:01,083 - OH, COME IN. 577 00:22:02,834 --> 00:22:04,166 - IS NOW A GOOD TIME? 578 00:22:04,166 --> 00:22:05,917 - MM-HMM, VERY, YEAH. - VERY. 579 00:22:05,917 --> 00:22:07,458 - I GOT THE CASTING FROM NEW YORK 580 00:22:07,458 --> 00:22:09,000 ON FIRST THE GOOD NEWS. 581 00:22:09,000 --> 00:22:11,291 I SENT YOU BOTH THE LINK. 582 00:22:11,291 --> 00:22:13,917 - GREAT. WE'LL DEFINITELY TAKE A LOOK. 583 00:22:13,917 --> 00:22:16,333 - HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND. ARE YOU DOING ANYTHING FUN? 584 00:22:16,333 --> 00:22:20,375 - THERE'S A NEW EXHIBIT AT THE HOLOCAUST MUSEUM. 585 00:22:20,375 --> 00:22:23,625 - MM, ENJOY. 586 00:22:23,625 --> 00:22:24,917 - MM, BYE. 587 00:22:24,917 --> 00:22:27,542 [door closes] 588 00:22:27,542 --> 00:22:29,083 - SHE LOOKED LIKE SHE SMELLED IT. 589 00:22:29,083 --> 00:22:31,166 - SHE ALWAYS LOOKS LIKE SHE SMELLED IT. 590 00:22:31,166 --> 00:22:33,500 - [laughing] 591 00:22:38,875 --> 00:22:40,333 - WHY IS IT SO QUIET? 592 00:22:40,333 --> 00:22:41,834 WHERE ARE THE BOYS? 593 00:22:41,834 --> 00:22:44,083 - I LIKE THAT YOU'RE JUST NOW WONDERING 594 00:22:44,083 --> 00:22:45,417 WHERE YOUR CHILDREN ARE. 595 00:22:45,417 --> 00:22:47,000 - [mumbles nonchalantly] 596 00:22:47,000 --> 00:22:49,333 - THEY'RE STAYING OVER AT MY MOTHER'S. 597 00:22:49,333 --> 00:22:50,959 - WILLINGLY? 598 00:22:54,041 --> 00:22:55,875 REMEMBER WHEN WE DIDN'T HAVE KIDS? 599 00:22:55,875 --> 00:22:57,834 THAT WAS NICE. 600 00:22:57,834 --> 00:23:00,166 - DON'T BLAME ME, MR. "JUST THE TIP." 601 00:23:00,166 --> 00:23:02,208 - [chuckles] AND TWICE. 602 00:23:02,208 --> 00:23:03,917 - MM. 603 00:23:03,917 --> 00:23:07,333 - I MEAN, I LOVE 'EM AND ALL, BUT... 604 00:23:07,333 --> 00:23:09,458 HOW GREAT WAS IT BEFORE THEY SHOWED UP? 605 00:23:09,458 --> 00:23:12,417 SCREWING ALL OVER THE HOUSE, 606 00:23:12,417 --> 00:23:14,667 GETTING ON THE BIKE, RIDING UP THE COAST. 607 00:23:14,667 --> 00:23:17,709 - IT WAS A DIFFERENT TIME. - MM. 608 00:23:17,709 --> 00:23:19,834 YEAH, YOU WERE CRAZY BACK THEN. 609 00:23:19,834 --> 00:23:24,125 - BACK THEN, I WOULD PROBABLY PUT ON THAT RUBBER DRESS. 610 00:23:24,125 --> 00:23:25,333 I'M NOT PUTTING ON THE RUBBER DRESS. 611 00:23:25,333 --> 00:23:27,333 - OKAY. 612 00:23:29,709 --> 00:23:32,500 - MMM. 613 00:23:32,500 --> 00:23:36,000 I MISS THIS. 614 00:23:36,000 --> 00:23:37,709 - YEAH, THIS IS NICE. 615 00:23:37,709 --> 00:23:39,041 - I MEANT DRINKING. 616 00:23:39,041 --> 00:23:40,917 - [chuckles] 617 00:23:43,875 --> 00:23:45,166 GOD, YOU'RE CUTE. 618 00:23:45,166 --> 00:23:47,083 I FORGET HOW CUTE YOU ARE. 619 00:23:47,083 --> 00:23:50,875 - SHUT UP. 620 00:23:50,875 --> 00:23:53,750 WHAT? 621 00:23:53,750 --> 00:23:57,125 I'M NOT PUTTING ON THE RUBBER DRESS. 622 00:24:06,875 --> 00:24:09,041 - FUCKING HELL. 623 00:24:13,041 --> 00:24:17,417 - COME ON, LET ME SEE. 624 00:24:17,417 --> 00:24:19,250 [door opens] 625 00:24:19,250 --> 00:24:21,792 WHOA. 626 00:24:21,792 --> 00:24:24,750 THAT'S THE BEST THING TO HAPPEN TO RUBBER SINCE TIRES. 627 00:24:24,750 --> 00:24:26,667 - BUY A LATEX GIRL A DRINK? 628 00:24:38,166 --> 00:24:41,250 OH, FUCK. 629 00:24:43,917 --> 00:24:45,709 - [chuckles] 630 00:24:45,709 --> 00:24:48,166 - WHAT'S FUNNY? 631 00:24:48,166 --> 00:24:50,792 - I'M PICTURING YOU WITH MERC. 632 00:24:50,792 --> 00:24:53,000 - WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO DO THAT? 633 00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:56,500 - FIVE YEARS? REALLY? 634 00:24:56,500 --> 00:24:59,291 - YEAH, BUT I'M IN MY 30s, 635 00:24:59,291 --> 00:25:02,709 SO THAT'S NOT TIME WASTED. 636 00:25:02,709 --> 00:25:04,000 [both chuckle] 637 00:25:04,000 --> 00:25:05,959 - WOW. OKAY. 638 00:25:05,959 --> 00:25:07,375 SO, MERC... 639 00:25:07,375 --> 00:25:12,041 MY EX-HUSBAND AND I HEARD A RUMOR. 640 00:25:12,041 --> 00:25:14,583 - PROBABLY TRUE. 641 00:25:14,583 --> 00:25:16,917 - CASTOR SOTTO? - MM-HMM. 642 00:25:16,917 --> 00:25:19,959 - AH! WHAT IS WITH YOU AND BOSSES? 643 00:25:19,959 --> 00:25:22,583 HAVE A TYPE, DO YOU? - [chuckles] 644 00:25:22,583 --> 00:25:26,959 I THINK I'M ATTRACTED TO POWER. 645 00:25:26,959 --> 00:25:31,000 ALSO, I MAY HAVE SOME FATHER ISSUES. 646 00:25:31,000 --> 00:25:33,333 - SELF-AWARE AND FUCKED UP. 647 00:25:33,333 --> 00:25:34,333 - PLEASED TO MEET YOU. 648 00:25:34,333 --> 00:25:36,458 [both laugh] 649 00:25:36,458 --> 00:25:39,333 OKAY, WHY ARE WE ONLY TALKING ABOUT MY SHIT? 650 00:25:39,333 --> 00:25:42,041 YOU MUST HAVE SHIT. 651 00:25:42,041 --> 00:25:44,208 - OH, I DO HAVE SOME SHIT. 652 00:25:44,208 --> 00:25:45,625 - SO? 653 00:25:45,625 --> 00:25:48,291 WHAT'S YOUR TYPE? 654 00:25:48,291 --> 00:25:49,542 ARE YOU SEEING ANYBODY OR-- 655 00:25:49,542 --> 00:25:52,208 - WAS. ENDED THREE MONTHS AGO. 656 00:25:52,208 --> 00:25:55,458 - AW. - IT'S FINE. ALL GOOD. 657 00:25:55,458 --> 00:25:58,000 - IS HE ANYONE I'D KNOW? 658 00:25:58,000 --> 00:26:00,208 - UH, MAYBE. - MM-HMM? 659 00:26:00,208 --> 00:26:04,917 - HE'S JENNIFER COLLIER FROM CHANNEL THREE NEWS. 660 00:26:07,375 --> 00:26:09,875 - AH. - MM. 661 00:26:09,875 --> 00:26:13,041 - SO YOUR TYPE IS... 662 00:26:13,041 --> 00:26:15,000 - I'D SAY SMART... 663 00:26:15,000 --> 00:26:16,375 - [laughs] 664 00:26:16,375 --> 00:26:19,000 - BEAUTIFUL, 665 00:26:19,000 --> 00:26:22,625 SLIGHTLY DAMAGED. 666 00:26:22,625 --> 00:26:25,792 YOU KNOW ANYONE LIKE THAT? 667 00:26:25,792 --> 00:26:27,583 - OH... 668 00:26:27,583 --> 00:26:29,125 MY. 669 00:26:45,792 --> 00:26:47,750 SO... 670 00:26:47,750 --> 00:26:51,750 MAYBE NOT JUST FATHER ISSUES. 671 00:26:51,750 --> 00:26:53,792 [keys clacking]