1 00:00:12,125 --> 00:00:13,750 MONDAY, 8:00. 2 00:00:13,750 --> 00:00:15,875 "PUCKS." BYE-BYE! 3 00:00:15,875 --> 00:00:17,333 [ SIGHS ] I LIKE "PUCKS." 4 00:00:17,333 --> 00:00:18,834 NO. I'M SORRY. 5 00:00:18,834 --> 00:00:21,166 I SAY WE GIVE IT ONE MORE CHANCE. 6 00:00:21,166 --> 00:00:23,667 I GOT TO GET OFF THE SHOW. I'M SORRY. 7 00:00:23,667 --> 00:00:25,875 I CAN'T QUIT. BUT IF YOU KILL ME -- 8 00:00:25,875 --> 00:00:28,750 WE CAN'T KILL YOU. SURE, YOU CAN. YOU CREATED ME. 9 00:00:28,750 --> 00:00:30,208 DON'T YOU THINK IF WE COULD KILL YOU, 10 00:00:30,208 --> 00:00:31,250 WE'D HAVE DONE IT BY NOW? 11 00:00:31,250 --> 00:00:33,125 WHAT DID YOU SAY? 12 00:00:37,208 --> 00:00:39,291 WHAT DID YOU SAY? 13 00:00:39,291 --> 00:00:43,542 MAYBE WE SHOULD TRY ADJUSTING YOUR MEDICATION AGAIN. 14 00:00:44,542 --> 00:00:46,041 MAYBE. 15 00:00:47,542 --> 00:00:52,500 [ TYPEWRITER CLICKING, BELL CHIMES ] 16 00:00:52,500 --> 00:00:54,333 [ WIND WHISTLING ] 17 00:00:59,959 --> 00:01:02,917 [ MID-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ] 18 00:01:27,250 --> 00:01:29,083 [ GUNSHOT ] 19 00:01:41,583 --> 00:01:43,417 [ RUMBLING, SIREN WAILS ] 20 00:01:45,417 --> 00:01:47,792 WHAT'S GOING ON? 21 00:01:47,792 --> 00:01:49,750 MORE NEWS FROM PERU. 22 00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:52,542 [ CRASHING, RUMBLING ] 23 00:01:52,542 --> 00:01:54,667 OH, GOD. 24 00:01:54,667 --> 00:01:56,959 SO AWFUL. I KNOW. 25 00:01:56,959 --> 00:01:58,667 UNBELIEVABLE. 26 00:01:58,667 --> 00:02:02,125 YOU KEEP THINKING -- THERE'S PEOPLE UNDER THERE. 27 00:02:02,125 --> 00:02:04,583 MAKES ME WANT TO CRY. 28 00:02:04,583 --> 00:02:06,917 [ CRASHING, RUMBLING ] 29 00:02:10,542 --> 00:02:12,208 IS THAT THE NEW iPAD? 30 00:02:12,208 --> 00:02:13,291 YEAH. 31 00:02:13,291 --> 00:02:14,208 LIKE IT? 32 00:02:14,208 --> 00:02:15,917 WELL... IT'S NOT THAT DIFFERENT. 33 00:02:15,917 --> 00:02:18,125 I HATE MY PHONE. 34 00:02:18,125 --> 00:02:19,750 Beverly: YOU READY? 35 00:02:19,750 --> 00:02:21,417 [ CLEARS THROAT ] 36 00:02:22,250 --> 00:02:25,417 UH, MAY WE, UH, HAVE EVERYONE'S ATTENTION, PLEASE? 37 00:02:25,417 --> 00:02:28,959 HELLO! IF, UH, EVERYONE COULD, UM, GATHER 'ROUND. 38 00:02:28,959 --> 00:02:30,125 [ CLEARS THROAT ] 39 00:02:30,125 --> 00:02:32,834 WE ACTUALLY HAVE A PIECE OF GOOD NEWS. 40 00:02:32,834 --> 00:02:36,458 THE NETWORK HAS DECIDED, IN ITS INFINITE WISDOM, 41 00:02:36,458 --> 00:02:39,875 TO MOVE OUR LITTLE SHOW TO A DIFFERENT NIGHT 42 00:02:39,875 --> 00:02:44,041 SO WE WILL NO LONGER BE OPPOSITE THE MUCH-REVILED TALKING DOG! 43 00:02:44,041 --> 00:02:45,625 [ CHEERING ] 44 00:02:45,625 --> 00:02:46,792 DO WE KNOW WHAT NIGHT YET? 45 00:02:46,792 --> 00:02:48,417 SATURDAYS AT 8:00. 46 00:02:48,417 --> 00:02:49,750 [ MURMURING ] 47 00:02:49,750 --> 00:02:53,166 HEY, THIS IS STILL GOOD. 48 00:02:53,166 --> 00:02:55,333 OKAY. FINE. SATURDAY IS SHITTY. 49 00:02:55,333 --> 00:02:56,959 BUT AT LEAST THEY'RE GIVING US A CHANCE. 50 00:02:56,959 --> 00:02:59,000 DON'T BE DICKS. 51 00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:02,500 WELL, THANK YOU, MORNING. 52 00:03:02,500 --> 00:03:04,583 WORDS TO LIVE BY. 53 00:03:04,583 --> 00:03:07,166 DON'T BE DICKS. 54 00:03:08,667 --> 00:03:13,208 SO...THAT'S OUR GOOD NEWS. 55 00:03:14,959 --> 00:03:16,208 YAY. 56 00:03:21,458 --> 00:03:23,000 THAT'LL TOTALLY WORK. 57 00:03:23,000 --> 00:03:24,500 MAY WE SEE YOU FOR A MOMENT? 58 00:03:24,500 --> 00:03:25,667 YEAH. SURE. 59 00:03:25,667 --> 00:03:27,208 WHAT'S UP? 60 00:03:27,208 --> 00:03:29,875 UH, APPARENTLY, THE NETWORK BOOKED YOU ON JAY LENO 61 00:03:29,875 --> 00:03:31,250 TO PROMOTE THE NEW NIGHT. 62 00:03:31,250 --> 00:03:33,583 YEAH. AND THEY'RE SAYING YOU'RE REFUSING. 63 00:03:33,583 --> 00:03:35,000 RIGHT. 64 00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:38,000 UM...WHY? 65 00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:40,291 SERIOUSLY? 66 00:03:40,291 --> 00:03:42,625 LAST WEEK I ASKED YOU TO KILL ME OFF THE SHOW. 67 00:03:42,625 --> 00:03:44,458 WHAT DID YOU SAY? NO. 68 00:03:44,458 --> 00:03:46,542 AND NOW YOU'RE ASKING ME TO PROMOTE THE SHOW. 69 00:03:46,542 --> 00:03:48,208 YES. UH, NO. 70 00:03:48,208 --> 00:03:50,250 LOOK, I DON'T KNOW IF I MENTIONED IT, 71 00:03:50,250 --> 00:03:51,959 BUT I JUST WANT THIS THING TO FUCKING DIE. 72 00:03:51,959 --> 00:03:53,875 PERHAPS YOU CAN TELL JAY 73 00:03:53,875 --> 00:03:55,709 YOU WANT IT TO DIE SATURDAY NIGHTS AT 8:00. 74 00:03:55,709 --> 00:03:56,750 CUTE. 75 00:03:56,750 --> 00:03:58,417 LISTEN, I'M HARDLY IN IT. 76 00:03:58,417 --> 00:04:00,583 NOW THEY'RE MOVING US TO THE WORST NIGHT OF THE WEEK? 77 00:04:00,583 --> 00:04:03,125 WHY SHOULD I DO ANYTHING TO MAKE THIS SHIT LAST LONGER? 78 00:04:03,125 --> 00:04:05,875 WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SUCH A SELFISH PRICK? 79 00:04:05,875 --> 00:04:07,375 LOOK AROUND. 80 00:04:07,375 --> 00:04:11,208 THERE ARE 150 PEOPLE HERE WHOSE JOBS HANG IN THE BALANCE. 81 00:04:11,208 --> 00:04:14,792 FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE, IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT YOU. 82 00:04:14,792 --> 00:04:18,625 THINK ABOUT THE OTHER PEOPLE. 83 00:04:22,750 --> 00:04:25,458 THAT SEEMS UNFAIR, BUT ALL RIGHT. 84 00:04:31,333 --> 00:04:34,709 I CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT THAT WHOLE PERU THING, 85 00:04:34,709 --> 00:04:36,750 ALL THOSE PEOPLE. 86 00:04:36,750 --> 00:04:37,875 HORRIBLE. 87 00:04:37,875 --> 00:04:40,166 I DON'T KNOW IF I COULD SURVIVE SOMETHING LIKE THAT. 88 00:04:40,166 --> 00:04:42,291 I REALLY DON'T. IT'S MY WORST NIGHTMARE. 89 00:04:42,291 --> 00:04:44,417 YOU WANT TO TALK WORST NIGHTMARES? 90 00:04:44,417 --> 00:04:47,166 GUESS WHO'S COMING IN TO PITCH TOMORROW. 91 00:04:47,166 --> 00:04:47,917 WHO? 92 00:04:47,917 --> 00:04:49,959 MERC LAPIDUS. 93 00:04:49,959 --> 00:04:51,709 NO. PITCH WHAT? 94 00:04:51,709 --> 00:04:52,959 SHOWS. 95 00:04:52,959 --> 00:04:55,834 MERC LAPIDUS IS PITCHING SHOWS TO YOU? 96 00:04:55,834 --> 00:04:57,333 THAT'S INSANE. 97 00:04:57,333 --> 00:05:01,542 THAT'S LIKE HENRY VIII PITCHING TO ANNE BOLEYN'S HEAD. 98 00:05:01,542 --> 00:05:03,000 SEE, STUFF LIKE THAT 99 00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:06,792 IS PROBABLY WHY YOU DON'T HAVE A LOT OF FRIENDS. 100 00:05:06,792 --> 00:05:09,000 AND WHY DO YOU HAVE TO DO THIS? 101 00:05:09,000 --> 00:05:10,291 [ GROANS ] 102 00:05:10,291 --> 00:05:12,291 WE'VE GOT A FIRST-LOOK DEAL WITH HIM. 103 00:05:12,291 --> 00:05:14,208 IT WAS PART OF HIS EXIT PACKAGE. 104 00:05:14,208 --> 00:05:16,834 SOUNDS AWFUL. JUST THE TWO OF YOU IN A ROOM. 105 00:05:16,834 --> 00:05:18,291 OH, GOD, NO. 106 00:05:18,291 --> 00:05:22,583 ANDY AND MYRA WILL BE THERE, PLUS CASTOR. 107 00:05:22,583 --> 00:05:27,959 EVEN SO, I AM DREADING IT, JUST SEEING MERC AGAIN. 108 00:05:27,959 --> 00:05:30,458 IT'S LIKE THE THING THAT WOULDN'T DIE. 109 00:05:30,458 --> 00:05:31,625 [ SIGHS ] 110 00:05:31,625 --> 00:05:33,667 YOU KNOW THE SCARIEST PART? 111 00:05:33,667 --> 00:05:39,917 WHAT IF I SEE HIM AND ALL THESE FEELINGS COME RUSHING BACK? 112 00:05:39,917 --> 00:05:41,625 LET ME JUST SAY THIS -- 113 00:05:41,625 --> 00:05:44,667 IF YOU GET BACK TOGETHER WITH MERC LAPIDUS, 114 00:05:44,667 --> 00:05:48,166 I WILL LOSE EVERY SHRED OF RESPECT I HAVE FOR YOU. 115 00:05:48,166 --> 00:05:49,542 YOU HAVE RESPECT FOR ME? 116 00:05:49,542 --> 00:05:50,959 EEE! 117 00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:02,125 HEY. YOU KNOW THIS THING TOMORROW NIGHT? 118 00:06:02,125 --> 00:06:03,583 YOU GUYS WANT TO GO TOGETHER? 119 00:06:03,583 --> 00:06:06,667 UH, FIRST OF ALL, NO. AND WHAT THING? 120 00:06:06,667 --> 00:06:08,333 THE TELETHON FOR THE PERU THING. 121 00:06:08,333 --> 00:06:10,333 THERE'S A TELETHON? YEAH. 122 00:06:10,333 --> 00:06:12,667 GEORGE CLOONEY'S DOING IT, MATT DAMON, TAYLOR SWIFT, JAY-Z. 123 00:06:12,667 --> 00:06:15,291 AND YOU? 124 00:06:15,291 --> 00:06:16,333 UH-HUH. 125 00:06:16,333 --> 00:06:18,041 FUCK ME. 126 00:06:18,041 --> 00:06:21,041 MY PUBLICIST IS TRYING TO GET ME NEXT TO JENNIFER GARNER. 127 00:06:21,041 --> 00:06:22,750 GOT TO GET ME SOME CAMERA TIME, RIGHT? 128 00:06:22,750 --> 00:06:25,917 FIGURE BEN AFFLECK COMES OVER, I'M IN THE SHOT. 129 00:06:25,917 --> 00:06:27,875 THE WHOLE THING'S PRETTY COOL. 130 00:06:27,875 --> 00:06:30,750 NOT FOR THE 20,000 PEOPLE THAT WERE KILLED. 131 00:06:30,750 --> 00:06:31,792 WHERE? 132 00:06:31,792 --> 00:06:33,917 PERU? 133 00:06:33,917 --> 00:06:35,125 OH. 134 00:06:35,125 --> 00:06:37,417 YEAH. RIGHT. TOTALLY. 135 00:06:37,417 --> 00:06:39,375 SO, YOU GUYS, UH, DONE ONE OF THESE BEFORE? 136 00:06:39,375 --> 00:06:42,625 UH, YEAH. I DID 9/11 AND KATRINA. 137 00:06:42,625 --> 00:06:46,083 NICE. I DID THE EXXON VALDEZ AND THREE MILE ISLAND. 138 00:06:47,125 --> 00:06:48,834 HUH. 139 00:06:48,834 --> 00:06:50,875 ANYWAY. SO THIS IS MY FIRST ONE. 140 00:06:50,875 --> 00:06:52,709 IT'S KIND OF A BIG DEAL. 141 00:06:52,709 --> 00:06:59,250 SO HERE'S MY QUESTION -- SPORT JACKET OR NO SPORT JACKET? 142 00:06:59,250 --> 00:07:02,041 JUST LIKE AN OPEN SHIRT? WHAT DO YOU THINK? 143 00:07:02,041 --> 00:07:03,458 LIKE, TIE? NO TIE? 144 00:07:03,458 --> 00:07:05,083 UH, I DON'T FUCKING CARE. 145 00:07:05,083 --> 00:07:07,333 OKAY. SO NO JACKET. 146 00:07:07,333 --> 00:07:09,041 AND I FIGURE THEY CAN'T SEE MY PANTS, 147 00:07:09,041 --> 00:07:10,500 SO THAT DOESN'T MATTER, RIGHT? 148 00:07:10,500 --> 00:07:12,333 I'D STILL WEAR THEM. 149 00:07:12,333 --> 00:07:14,333 EXACTLY. 150 00:07:14,333 --> 00:07:16,542 ALSO, I DON'T HAVE TO GIVE MONEY, DO I? 151 00:07:18,333 --> 00:07:19,625 WHAT? 152 00:07:27,667 --> 00:07:30,083 DID YOU DO THE ONE FOR THE HINDENBURG, TOO? 153 00:07:30,083 --> 00:07:31,375 DICK. 154 00:07:34,917 --> 00:07:38,625 SO, HOW ARE THE NEW MEDS WORKING OUT? 155 00:07:38,625 --> 00:07:42,792 BETTER, I THINK. YEAH. I'M NOT HEARING SO MANY... 156 00:07:42,792 --> 00:07:45,041 VOICES? YEAH. NOT AS MUCH. 157 00:07:45,041 --> 00:07:46,458 AND THE RAGE? 158 00:07:46,458 --> 00:07:47,667 PRETTY GOOD. PRETTY GOOD. 159 00:07:47,667 --> 00:07:50,625 WELL, THAT'S ENCOURAGING. SIDE EFFECTS? 160 00:07:50,625 --> 00:07:53,667 DRY MOUTH, CONSTIPATION, DISCOLORED URINE? 161 00:07:53,667 --> 00:07:55,917 EVERYTHING MAKES ME HARD. 162 00:07:55,917 --> 00:07:57,333 TALK ABOUT THAT. 163 00:07:57,333 --> 00:07:58,458 EVERYTHING. 164 00:07:58,458 --> 00:08:00,250 THIS MORNING, WHEN I WAS GETTING GAS, 165 00:08:00,250 --> 00:08:02,291 I GOT A BONER PUTTING THE NOZZLE INTO THE TANK. 166 00:08:02,291 --> 00:08:03,583 HUH. 167 00:08:03,583 --> 00:08:05,792 DOES MASTURBATING HELP? EVENTUALLY. 168 00:08:05,792 --> 00:08:08,083 BUT IT TAKES FUCKING FOREVER. 169 00:08:08,083 --> 00:08:09,625 I'M GETTING CALLUSES ON MY FINGERS. 170 00:08:09,625 --> 00:08:11,458 I MIGHT AS WELL TAKE UP THE GUITAR. 171 00:08:11,458 --> 00:08:13,333 HUH. 172 00:08:13,333 --> 00:08:15,583 LOOK, I UNDERSTAND THIS IS DIFFICULT, 173 00:08:15,583 --> 00:08:17,667 BUT I WOULD LIKE TO ASK YOU TO HANG IN THERE 174 00:08:17,667 --> 00:08:20,041 JUST A LITTLE BIT LONGER. YOU'RE KIDDING, RIGHT? 175 00:08:20,041 --> 00:08:22,166 I CAN'T ROLL OVER AT NIGHT! I HEAR YOU. 176 00:08:22,166 --> 00:08:24,375 BUT OTHER THAN THAT, THE MEDS SEEM TO BE WORKING. 177 00:08:24,375 --> 00:08:26,250 HOPEFULLY, WITH TIME, THIS PARTICULAR SIDE EFFECT 178 00:08:26,250 --> 00:08:31,667 WILL, UH...ABATE. 179 00:08:31,667 --> 00:08:34,917 Man: CUT. THAT'S A WRAP. 180 00:08:34,917 --> 00:08:37,250 WELL, GOOD LUCK TONIGHT ON LENO. 181 00:08:37,250 --> 00:08:38,417 OH, THANKS. 182 00:08:38,417 --> 00:08:39,709 THANKS. YOU GUYS WANT TO COME? 183 00:08:39,709 --> 00:08:42,000 JAMIE'S GONNA BE THERE. WE COULD ALL GO OUT AFTER. 184 00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:43,375 SORRY. WE HAVE TO WORK. 185 00:08:43,375 --> 00:08:45,125 WHAT WORK? WE'RE WRAPPED. 186 00:08:45,125 --> 00:08:47,000 [ LAUGHS ] MAYBE YOU'RE WRAPPED. 187 00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:48,625 WE'VE STILL GOT HOURS YET. 188 00:08:48,625 --> 00:08:50,291 DOING WHAT? 189 00:08:50,875 --> 00:08:52,291 THE WRITING. 190 00:08:52,291 --> 00:08:53,583 IS IT STUFF FOR ME? 191 00:08:53,583 --> 00:08:55,750 NO, BUT OTHER PEOPLE HAVE TO SAY WORDS. 192 00:08:55,750 --> 00:08:57,125 ARE THE WORDS ABOUT ME? 193 00:08:57,125 --> 00:08:58,417 NO. THEN FUCK IT. 194 00:08:58,417 --> 00:09:00,333 LET THE OTHER WRITERS COVER FOR ONCE. 195 00:09:00,333 --> 00:09:02,083 COME ON. THEY CAN DO IT. 196 00:09:02,083 --> 00:09:03,709 DO YOU EVEN KNOW THE OTHER WRITERS? 197 00:09:03,709 --> 00:09:05,500 YEAH, I KNOW THE OTHER WRITERS. 198 00:09:05,500 --> 00:09:07,250 I RAN INTO ONE AT A CLUB THIS WEEKEND. 199 00:09:07,250 --> 00:09:08,709 WHO? 200 00:09:08,709 --> 00:09:11,375 I WANT TO SAY...ALEX? 201 00:09:11,375 --> 00:09:13,542 WE DON'T HAVE AN ALEX. 202 00:09:13,542 --> 00:09:15,333 THE KIND OF TWITCHY JEWISH ONE. 203 00:09:15,333 --> 00:09:17,083 THAT'S ALL OF THEM. WHATEVER. 204 00:09:17,083 --> 00:09:18,625 COME WITH ME. YOU WANT TO MEET JAY? 205 00:09:18,625 --> 00:09:20,083 NOT ESPECIALLY. 206 00:09:20,083 --> 00:09:21,542 MIGHT BE FUN. 207 00:09:21,542 --> 00:09:23,750 WE HAVE SO MUCH TO DO. 208 00:09:23,750 --> 00:09:25,750 YOU CAN HAVE MY GIFT BAG. DO I HAVE TIME TO CHANGE? 209 00:09:25,750 --> 00:09:28,000 THERE YOU GO. 210 00:09:33,709 --> 00:09:35,375 [ SIGHS ] 211 00:09:35,375 --> 00:09:37,041 I JUST WANT TO GET THIS OVER WITH. 212 00:09:37,041 --> 00:09:38,208 I KNOW. 213 00:09:38,208 --> 00:09:39,875 IT'S LIKE WAITING FOR SANTA -- 214 00:09:39,875 --> 00:09:42,291 IF SANTA WAS A BULLSHITTING, TWO-FACED ASSHOLE 215 00:09:42,291 --> 00:09:44,083 WHO FIRED ME ONCE. 216 00:09:44,083 --> 00:09:45,917 MERC LAPIDUS IS HERE. 217 00:09:45,917 --> 00:09:47,375 HO, HO, HO. 218 00:09:47,375 --> 00:09:49,709 OKAY. BRING HIM IN. 219 00:09:49,709 --> 00:09:52,500 AND PLEASE TELL CASTOR SO HE CAN JOIN US. 220 00:09:52,500 --> 00:09:54,583 GOT IT. [ EXHALES DEEPLY ] 221 00:09:54,583 --> 00:09:55,959 YOU OKAY? 222 00:09:55,959 --> 00:09:56,917 ABSOLUTELY. 223 00:09:56,917 --> 00:09:59,291 I'M FINE. 224 00:09:59,291 --> 00:10:02,208 Woman on TV: RESCUERS WORKED FEVERISHLY THROUGH THE NIGHT 225 00:10:02,208 --> 00:10:05,709 SEARCHING FOR ANY SIGNS FROM INSIDE THE TUNNEL, 226 00:10:05,709 --> 00:10:07,208 AND THEN SUDDENLY... 227 00:10:07,208 --> 00:10:11,625 ABOUT 45 MINUTES AGO, A MIRACLE -- 228 00:10:11,625 --> 00:10:15,250 A FAINT TAPPING SOUND FROM DEEP UNDER THE RUBBLE. 229 00:10:15,250 --> 00:10:16,917 USING THE LATEST AUDIO EQUIPMENT, 230 00:10:16,917 --> 00:10:21,500 RESCUERS ESTABLISHED CONTACT WITH A WOMAN. 231 00:10:21,500 --> 00:10:24,542 ACCORDING TO SOURCES, SHE IS TRAPPED 232 00:10:24,542 --> 00:10:28,834 IN A SPACE NOT MUCH BIGGER THAN A COFFIN. 233 00:10:28,834 --> 00:10:32,792 ONE CAN'T HELP BUT IMAGINE WHAT IT MUST BE LIKE FOR HER, 234 00:10:32,792 --> 00:10:37,125 BURIED IN THIS DARK, DANK HOLE 235 00:10:37,125 --> 00:10:38,792 DEEP IN THE GROUND 236 00:10:38,792 --> 00:10:44,208 NOT KNOWING IF SHE WILL EVER SEE DAYLIGHT AGAIN. 237 00:10:44,208 --> 00:10:47,500 WE'RE TOLD SHE'S BARELY ABLE TO MOVE, 238 00:10:47,500 --> 00:10:51,834 HER BODY PINNED BENEATH THE DEBRIS. 239 00:10:51,834 --> 00:10:57,291 A PRISONER ENCASED IN STONE AND TWISTED STEEL. 240 00:10:57,291 --> 00:11:00,125 RESCUERS ARE HOPING TO SNAKE A TUBE 241 00:11:00,125 --> 00:11:01,792 THROUGH THE WRECKAGE 242 00:11:01,792 --> 00:11:06,125 TO BRING THIS WOMAN MUCH-NEEDED HYDRATION. 243 00:11:06,125 --> 00:11:09,500 PRESUMABLY, SHE'S GONE OVER 36 HOURS WITHOUT WATER. 244 00:11:09,500 --> 00:11:10,959 [ INTERCOM BEEPS ] 245 00:11:10,959 --> 00:11:13,208 Woman: THEY'RE READY FOR YOU FOR THE MERC LAPIDUS MEETING. 246 00:11:13,208 --> 00:11:14,750 I'LL COME AS SOON AS I CAN. 247 00:11:14,750 --> 00:11:17,041 Woman on TV: ...AND, OF COURSE, VERY... 248 00:11:17,041 --> 00:11:19,750 THERE THEY ARE. 249 00:11:19,750 --> 00:11:21,959 [ LAUGHS ] YOU SEE? 250 00:11:21,959 --> 00:11:23,333 YOU DON'T GET RID OF ME THAT EASY. 251 00:11:23,333 --> 00:11:25,375 [ LAUGHTER ] COME HERE. 252 00:11:25,375 --> 00:11:27,166 THAT'S O-- OKAY. 253 00:11:27,166 --> 00:11:29,792 THERE'S MY QUEEN OF COMEDY. 254 00:11:29,792 --> 00:11:30,667 [ GRUNTS ] 255 00:11:30,667 --> 00:11:33,500 MR. BUTTON! COME HERE. 256 00:11:33,500 --> 00:11:35,709 WHY DON'T WE ALL SIT DOWN? 257 00:11:35,709 --> 00:11:37,417 NO. THAT'S ME. 258 00:11:37,417 --> 00:11:38,375 WHOOPS. 259 00:11:38,375 --> 00:11:40,458 [ LAUGHS ] 260 00:11:40,458 --> 00:11:43,333 [ EXHALES DEEPLY ] SO, HOW IS EVERYBODY? 261 00:11:43,333 --> 00:11:44,583 MISS ME YET? 262 00:11:44,583 --> 00:11:46,333 WE MIGHT IF YOU DIDN'T COME BACK. 263 00:11:46,333 --> 00:11:48,333 [ LAUGHTER ] 264 00:11:48,333 --> 00:11:51,333 CASTOR IS STUCK ON A CALL. HE'LL JOIN AS SOON AS HE CAN. 265 00:11:51,333 --> 00:11:52,458 OH, THAT'S FINE. 266 00:11:52,458 --> 00:11:54,834 IT WILL GIVE US ALL A CHANCE TO CATCH UP. 267 00:11:54,834 --> 00:11:57,834 GREAT. [ LAUGHS, SIGHS ] 268 00:12:03,083 --> 00:12:05,041 LOOK AT THIS. 269 00:12:05,041 --> 00:12:08,250 OTHER THAN A "TONIGHT SHOW" MUG, WHICH I'LL NEVER USE... 270 00:12:08,250 --> 00:12:10,917 MEN'S COLOGNE... 271 00:12:10,917 --> 00:12:13,166 A TIE. 272 00:12:15,375 --> 00:12:17,166 [ SIGHS ] 273 00:12:17,166 --> 00:12:20,500 "TONIGHT SHOW" CUFF LINKS. THIS IS ALL CRAP FOR MEN. 274 00:12:20,500 --> 00:12:22,500 IT WAS MEANT FOR ME. 275 00:12:22,500 --> 00:12:24,208 TELL THEM YOU WANT A GIRL'S BAG. 276 00:12:24,208 --> 00:12:25,375 YEAH. I'M NOT DOING THAT. 277 00:12:25,375 --> 00:12:27,000 IF YOU DON'T WANT IT, I'LL TAKE IT. 278 00:12:27,000 --> 00:12:28,500 I DIDN'T SAY I DIDN'T WANT IT. 279 00:12:28,500 --> 00:12:30,417 HEY, YOU MADE IT. 280 00:12:30,417 --> 00:12:31,458 THANK YOU. 281 00:12:31,458 --> 00:12:32,959 SORRY I'M LATE. 282 00:12:32,959 --> 00:12:36,083 I WAS WORKING THE PHONES, RAISING MONEY FOR PERU. 283 00:12:36,083 --> 00:12:38,750 NOW THEY'RE SAYING IT'S THE THIRD-WORST NATURAL DISASTER 284 00:12:38,750 --> 00:12:40,291 IN THE HISTORY OF LATIN AMERICA. 285 00:12:40,291 --> 00:12:41,834 A COMB. [ SCOFFS ] 286 00:12:41,834 --> 00:12:44,875 WHO STILL USES A COMB? THIS IS BULLSHIT! 287 00:12:44,875 --> 00:12:46,250 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 288 00:12:46,250 --> 00:12:47,417 HEY, MATT. HEY. 289 00:12:47,417 --> 00:12:50,542 SO, JAY IS FINE WITH THE MOSQUITO STORY. GREAT. 290 00:12:50,542 --> 00:12:53,041 THERE MAY NOT BE TIME FOR THE THING ABOUT YOUR KIDS. 291 00:12:53,041 --> 00:12:54,917 AH. WHAT IF I DON'T TALK ABOUT "PUCKS"? 292 00:12:54,917 --> 00:12:57,000 HOPEFULLY WE'LL HAVE TIME FOR ALL OF IT. 293 00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:57,959 OKAY. 294 00:12:57,959 --> 00:12:59,583 UH, BY THE WAY, 295 00:12:59,583 --> 00:13:03,417 UM, I'M FINE STAYING ON THE COUCH FOR ZAC EFRON'S SEGMENT. 296 00:13:03,417 --> 00:13:07,375 UM, ACTUALLY, ZAC'S UP FIRST, AND THEN HE HAS TO TAKE OFF, 297 00:13:07,375 --> 00:13:09,083 SO WE'RE GOOD. 298 00:13:09,083 --> 00:13:11,250 UH, WAIT A MINUTE. I'M SECOND? 299 00:13:11,250 --> 00:13:12,250 UH, YEAH. 300 00:13:12,250 --> 00:13:13,875 UH, NO. 301 00:13:13,875 --> 00:13:14,959 YEAH. 302 00:13:14,959 --> 00:13:17,458 NO. THAT'S WRONG. I'M ALWAYS FIRST. 303 00:13:17,458 --> 00:13:19,166 I'M -- I'M NEVER SECOND. 304 00:13:19,166 --> 00:13:21,917 UH... NOT SURE WHAT TO TELL YOU. 305 00:13:21,917 --> 00:13:23,667 WELL, THERE'S GOT TO BE A MISTAKE. 306 00:13:23,667 --> 00:13:25,500 IT'S NOT. 307 00:13:27,125 --> 00:13:30,917 DOES JAY KNOW ABOUT THIS? 308 00:13:34,959 --> 00:13:37,959 AND DID YOU SEE THE PICTURES OF THAT CHURCH? OH! 309 00:13:37,959 --> 00:13:40,375 I'M TELLING YOU, MY HEART BREAKS FOR THOSE PEOPLE. 310 00:13:40,375 --> 00:13:43,417 THOSE POOR, POOR PEOPLE. 311 00:13:44,458 --> 00:13:45,709 PERU. 312 00:13:45,709 --> 00:13:47,500 NEVER BEEN THERE. 313 00:13:47,500 --> 00:13:49,208 NOT GOING NOW. 314 00:13:49,208 --> 00:13:51,792 [ GROANS SOFTLY ] 315 00:13:51,792 --> 00:13:54,542 I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S KEEPING CASTOR. 316 00:13:54,542 --> 00:13:56,542 WHY DON'T WE START WITHOUT HIM? 317 00:13:56,542 --> 00:13:58,834 NO! IT'S OKAY! I CAN WAIT FOR THE BIG GUY. 318 00:13:58,834 --> 00:14:01,667 OKAY. [ LAUGHS ] 319 00:14:02,625 --> 00:14:06,417 PETER, PLEASE FIND OUT HOW MUCH LONGER CASTOR IS GOING TO BE. 320 00:14:06,417 --> 00:14:08,333 [ CHUCKLES ] 321 00:14:08,333 --> 00:14:11,500 Woman on TV: ALTHOUGH RESCUERS CAN STILL HEAR HER MOANS, 322 00:14:11,500 --> 00:14:13,667 THEY ARE DEFINITELY GETTING WEAKER. 323 00:14:13,667 --> 00:14:17,250 FOR NOW, ALL THAT ANY OF US CAN DO IS PRAY. 324 00:14:17,250 --> 00:14:18,333 OH, PLEASE, GOD. 325 00:14:18,333 --> 00:14:19,750 [ INTERCOM BEEPS ] 326 00:14:19,750 --> 00:14:22,500 Woman: THEY'RE ASKING AGAIN ABOUT THE MERC LAPIDUS MEETING. 327 00:14:22,500 --> 00:14:24,333 I'M NOT COMING! 328 00:14:24,333 --> 00:14:26,542 Woman on TV: ...AND DIG THIS FORMER... 329 00:14:27,792 --> 00:14:31,125 AH. THANKS. 330 00:14:31,125 --> 00:14:32,959 AH. 331 00:14:32,959 --> 00:14:35,417 APPARENTLY, CASTOR JUST GOT CALLED AWAY 332 00:14:35,417 --> 00:14:38,250 TO AN EMERGENCY MEETING OUT OF THE OFFICE, 333 00:14:38,250 --> 00:14:42,041 SO IT LOOKS LIKE HE'S NOT GOING TO BE JOINING US AFTER ALL. 334 00:14:42,041 --> 00:14:44,041 [ CHUCKLES ] AH. SCREW HIM. 335 00:14:44,041 --> 00:14:46,375 EVERYONE KNOWS YOU'VE ALWAYS RUN THIS PLACE ANYWAY. 336 00:14:46,375 --> 00:14:48,041 [ LAUGHTER ] 337 00:14:49,792 --> 00:14:51,333 SO, WHAT HAVE YOU GOT? 338 00:14:51,333 --> 00:14:52,583 ALL RIGHT. 339 00:14:52,583 --> 00:14:54,834 THE FIRST ONE IS A ONE-HOUR 340 00:14:54,834 --> 00:14:57,583 WITH A BIT OF A FANTASY/HORROR SLANT. 341 00:14:57,583 --> 00:14:59,250 OOH! OKAY. 342 00:14:59,250 --> 00:15:02,500 IN A WORD...GARGOYLES! 343 00:15:05,375 --> 00:15:07,041 [ CHUCKLES ] 344 00:15:07,041 --> 00:15:09,709 UM, I DON'T KNOW IF YOU REMEMBER, 345 00:15:09,709 --> 00:15:14,000 BUT RIGHT BEFORE YOU LEFT, WE ACTUALLY EXPLORED THIS ARENA. 346 00:15:15,333 --> 00:15:16,417 WE DID? 347 00:15:16,417 --> 00:15:18,959 BUT I'M EAGER TO HEAR YOUR TAKE ON IT. 348 00:15:20,083 --> 00:15:22,792 WELL, IT'S -- THAT'S PRETTY MUCH IT SO FAR. 349 00:15:22,792 --> 00:15:24,917 I MEAN, COME ON. GARGOYLES. 350 00:15:24,917 --> 00:15:26,500 [ LAUGHS ] RIGHT. 351 00:15:26,500 --> 00:15:29,291 UM, I THINK IT NEEDS A LITTLE MORE DEVELOPMENT. 352 00:15:29,291 --> 00:15:33,583 CHARACTER, STORY, THEMES, A PREMISE. 353 00:15:33,583 --> 00:15:35,875 FAIR ENOUGH. I-I HEAR YOU. 354 00:15:35,875 --> 00:15:38,250 ALSO, YOU SHOULD JUST KNOW -- 355 00:15:38,250 --> 00:15:42,834 A CONCERN THAT I ALWAYS HAD WITH...GARGOYLES AS A CONCEPT, 356 00:15:42,834 --> 00:15:44,667 IN TERMS OF THE JEOPARDY, 357 00:15:44,667 --> 00:15:48,250 IT SEEMS LIKE IF YOU JUST AVOID GOTHIC BUILDINGS. 358 00:15:49,917 --> 00:15:51,458 HUH. 359 00:15:51,458 --> 00:15:57,208 BUT MAYBE THERE IS A REASON WHY THE CHARACTERS HAVE TO BE 360 00:15:57,208 --> 00:15:58,667 NEAR GOTHIC BUILDINGS, 361 00:15:58,667 --> 00:16:02,959 LIKE, UM, IT'S SET AT A UNIVERSITY OR SOMETHING. 362 00:16:02,959 --> 00:16:04,166 WELL, THERE YOU GO! 363 00:16:04,166 --> 00:16:06,792 BING! WE SOLVED IT. 364 00:16:06,792 --> 00:16:09,625 OKAY. WELL, LET'S STICK A PIN IN THAT. 365 00:16:09,625 --> 00:16:11,166 WHAT ELSE HAVE YOU GOT? 366 00:16:11,166 --> 00:16:13,500 ALL RIGHT. THIS ONE'S A COMEDY. 367 00:16:14,500 --> 00:16:15,875 UP YOUR ALLEY. 368 00:16:15,875 --> 00:16:17,750 MM. 369 00:16:17,750 --> 00:16:19,959 SECOND? I'M ON SECOND?! 370 00:16:19,959 --> 00:16:21,792 WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT TO YOU? 371 00:16:21,792 --> 00:16:23,667 [ SIGHS ] IT'S GOT TO BE JAY. 372 00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:27,709 IT'S 'CAUSE I TOOK THAT FUCKING LAMBORGHINI. 373 00:16:27,709 --> 00:16:29,041 IT'S A LIMITED EDITION. 374 00:16:29,041 --> 00:16:30,750 THERE WAS ONLY ONE LEFT IN THE COUNTRY. 375 00:16:30,750 --> 00:16:33,709 MY CAR GUY TOLD ME JAY REALLY WANTED IT, BUT I TOOK IT ANYWAY. 376 00:16:33,709 --> 00:16:35,291 THIS IS HIM GETTING BACK AT ME. 377 00:16:35,291 --> 00:16:36,917 WOULD HE REALLY DO THAT? 378 00:16:36,917 --> 00:16:38,583 OVER A CAR? UH, YEAH. 379 00:16:38,583 --> 00:16:40,375 FUCKING LENO CAN BE A TOTAL -- 380 00:16:40,375 --> 00:16:41,417 A TOTAL WHAT? 381 00:16:41,417 --> 00:16:43,417 UH, MENSCH. A TOTAL MENSCH. 382 00:16:43,417 --> 00:16:45,250 MENSCH? SO "MENSCH" MEANS "PRICK" NOW? 383 00:16:45,250 --> 00:16:46,333 I NEVER KNEW THAT. 384 00:16:46,333 --> 00:16:48,834 [ BOTH LAUGH ] 385 00:16:48,834 --> 00:16:50,667 HEY, UH, THIS IS SEAN AND BEVERLY LINCOLN. 386 00:16:50,667 --> 00:16:51,583 THEY CREATED MY SHOW. 387 00:16:51,583 --> 00:16:52,750 HELLO. NICE TO MEET YOU. 388 00:16:52,750 --> 00:16:54,417 BRITISH OR JUST REALLY PRETENTIOUS? 389 00:16:54,417 --> 00:16:55,875 [ LAUGHS ] BRITISH. 390 00:16:55,875 --> 00:16:58,750 AND A LITTLE PRETENTIOUS. [ LAUGHS ] 391 00:16:58,750 --> 00:17:00,834 I DON'T KNOW WHY I SAID THAT. 392 00:17:00,834 --> 00:17:02,500 AND YOU KNOW JAMIE LAPIDUS. 393 00:17:02,500 --> 00:17:03,667 DO I KNOW JAMIE LAPIDUS? 394 00:17:03,667 --> 00:17:05,834 HELLO, BEAUTIFUL. HI, JAY. 395 00:17:05,834 --> 00:17:07,667 I AM SO SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOU AND MERC. 396 00:17:07,667 --> 00:17:09,208 OH, DON'T BE. I'M NOT. 397 00:17:09,208 --> 00:17:11,000 AND NOW YOU'RE WITH THIS GUY, HUH? YEAH. 398 00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:14,583 IT'S A GOOD THING YOU CAN'T SEE, 'CAUSE HE GOT REALLY OLD. 399 00:17:14,583 --> 00:17:16,875 HEY, JAY, UM, HERE'S THE THING. 400 00:17:16,875 --> 00:17:19,542 YEAH. I JUST FOUND OUT I'M ON SECOND. 401 00:17:19,542 --> 00:17:20,959 REALLY? REALLY. 402 00:17:20,959 --> 00:17:23,000 YEAH. LOOK, I'M NOT IN CHARGE OF THAT. 403 00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:24,709 I DON'T KNOW HOW THAT -- BULLSHIT. 404 00:17:24,709 --> 00:17:26,625 IT'S 'CAUSE I TOOK THAT FUCKING LAMBORGHINI. 405 00:17:26,625 --> 00:17:28,834 THAT WAS YOU? YOU FUCKING JIZZ BAG. 406 00:17:28,834 --> 00:17:31,417 WHAT, LIKE YOU DIDN'T KNOW? HEY, IF I KNEW, YOU WOULDN'T BE ON AT ALL. 407 00:17:31,417 --> 00:17:33,000 SO WHY AM I ON SECOND? 408 00:17:34,709 --> 00:17:37,458 LOOK, IT'S NOT "FRIENDS" ANYMORE. 409 00:17:37,458 --> 00:17:38,458 IT'S "PUCKS." 410 00:17:38,458 --> 00:17:39,667 STILL. 411 00:17:39,667 --> 00:17:41,041 "STILL"? 412 00:17:41,041 --> 00:17:43,291 THERE'S NO "STILL." 413 00:17:43,291 --> 00:17:45,834 SHIT CHANGES. 414 00:17:46,792 --> 00:17:48,667 BELIEVE ME. 415 00:17:49,750 --> 00:17:51,542 ENJOY THE SHOW, FOLKS. 416 00:17:53,500 --> 00:17:55,583 [ DOOR CLOSES ] 417 00:17:58,208 --> 00:18:00,542 SO, HOW DO YOU KNOW JAY? 418 00:18:00,542 --> 00:18:03,542 EVERY YEAR HE HOSTS MY EASTER EGG HUNT FOR CHILDREN'S CANCER. 419 00:18:03,542 --> 00:18:06,625 ASSHOLE. 420 00:18:06,625 --> 00:18:09,333 WOW. [ LAUGHS ] I'M BATTING 0 FOR 5 HERE. 421 00:18:09,333 --> 00:18:12,250 BUT THAT'S COOL. I GOT ANOTHER ONE. 422 00:18:12,250 --> 00:18:13,458 OKAY. 423 00:18:13,458 --> 00:18:15,917 NOW, I HAVEN'T GIVEN THIS ONE AS MUCH THOUGHT. 424 00:18:15,917 --> 00:18:18,041 IS THAT SCIENTIFICALLY POSSIBLE? 425 00:18:18,041 --> 00:18:20,417 IT'S ABOUT THIS GUY WHO LOSES HIS JOB 426 00:18:20,417 --> 00:18:22,208 AND HAS TO MOVE HOME WITH HIS PARENTS. 427 00:18:22,208 --> 00:18:24,250 UM, CAN I STOP YOU RIGHT THERE? 428 00:18:24,250 --> 00:18:28,083 AGAIN, IT'S AN AREA WE EXPLORED WHEN YOU WERE HERE. 429 00:18:28,083 --> 00:18:30,208 UH, DID WE LIKE IT? 430 00:18:30,208 --> 00:18:32,208 NO. 431 00:18:32,208 --> 00:18:34,208 AH. 432 00:18:34,208 --> 00:18:37,792 IN FACT, YOU WERE THE ONE WHO SAID, "IT'S BEEN DONE TO DEATH." 433 00:18:37,792 --> 00:18:39,667 [ LAUGHS ] WELL, YOU KNOW ME. 434 00:18:39,667 --> 00:18:41,375 I NEVER REMEMBER WHAT I SAY. 435 00:18:41,375 --> 00:18:42,208 WE DO. 436 00:18:43,291 --> 00:18:44,583 [ LAUGHS ] 437 00:18:44,583 --> 00:18:46,417 [ LAUGHS ] 438 00:18:46,417 --> 00:18:47,750 ALL RIGHTY. 439 00:18:47,750 --> 00:18:49,208 THIS WAS SO GREAT. 440 00:18:49,208 --> 00:18:51,375 YOU'VE GIVEN US A LOT TO THINK ABOUT. 441 00:18:51,375 --> 00:18:53,792 LET US TALK. UH-OH. 442 00:18:53,792 --> 00:18:55,417 I KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS. 443 00:18:55,417 --> 00:18:57,000 [ LAUGHS ] OKEY DOKEY. 444 00:18:57,000 --> 00:18:58,417 AH! 445 00:18:58,417 --> 00:19:01,583 HEY, KIDS, COULD I HAVE A MOMENT WITH MOM HERE? 446 00:19:03,625 --> 00:19:05,542 [ CHUCKLES ] MM. 447 00:19:05,542 --> 00:19:07,500 BYE-BYE. 448 00:19:09,291 --> 00:19:10,792 HATE HIM. 449 00:19:10,792 --> 00:19:12,625 HATE HIM LIKE HITLER. 450 00:19:12,625 --> 00:19:15,583 [ EXHALES DEEPLY ] 451 00:19:15,583 --> 00:19:18,250 SO, THIS WAS DIFFERENT. I'LL BET. 452 00:19:18,250 --> 00:19:20,291 MYRA'S STILL A HOOT. I'LL TELL YOU. 453 00:19:20,291 --> 00:19:23,333 IT'S NO PICNIC BEING ON THE OTHER END OF THAT SQUIRREL FACE. 454 00:19:23,333 --> 00:19:24,834 [ LAUGHS ] 455 00:19:24,834 --> 00:19:26,542 I'M SURE NONE OF THIS IS EASY. 456 00:19:26,542 --> 00:19:28,500 WHAT, ARE YOU -- ARE YOU KIDDING ME? 457 00:19:28,500 --> 00:19:31,166 THIS IS THE PART I LOVE -- THE PITCHING AND THE SCHMOOZING. 458 00:19:31,166 --> 00:19:32,667 I TELL YOU, THIS IS THE BEST THING 459 00:19:32,667 --> 00:19:33,875 THAT COULD HAVE HAPPENED TO ME. 460 00:19:33,875 --> 00:19:35,333 IT'S LIKE A WAKE-UP CALL. 461 00:19:35,333 --> 00:19:37,709 YOU KNOW, JUST TO RECHARGE MY BATTERIES. 462 00:19:37,709 --> 00:19:40,333 SERIOUSLY, YOU'VE GOT TO BUY FUCKING SOMETHING. 463 00:19:40,333 --> 00:19:41,500 I -- NOW, COME ON. 464 00:19:41,500 --> 00:19:42,917 I NEED THIS! 465 00:19:42,917 --> 00:19:44,375 IF I CAN'T SELL SOMETHING HERE, 466 00:19:44,375 --> 00:19:46,542 NO ONE IN THIS TOWN IS EVEN GONNA TALK TO ME. 467 00:19:46,542 --> 00:19:51,083 LOOK, THERE'S NOTHING HERE I CAN EVEN BRING TO CASTOR. 468 00:19:51,083 --> 00:19:54,041 BUY SOMETHING? WHAT AM I BUYING? 469 00:19:54,041 --> 00:19:57,291 YOU'RE BUYING FIVE YEARS OF US! OF LOVE. 470 00:19:58,834 --> 00:20:00,417 OKAY. I-I CAN'T DO THIS. 471 00:20:00,417 --> 00:20:01,542 YOU'VE GOT TO GO. 472 00:20:01,542 --> 00:20:02,667 I'M SORRY. 473 00:20:02,667 --> 00:20:03,959 I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY. 474 00:20:03,959 --> 00:20:06,625 THAT WAS SHITTY. I'M SORRY. PLEASE. PLEASE WAIT. 475 00:20:08,750 --> 00:20:11,333 I'M NOT -- NOT IN A VERY GOOD PLACE RIGHT NOW. 476 00:20:11,333 --> 00:20:15,208 I'M NOT DOING A VERY GOOD JOB HANDLING IT. 477 00:20:17,041 --> 00:20:19,458 YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO BE 52 478 00:20:19,458 --> 00:20:23,208 AND REALIZE YOU FUCKED YOURSELF OUT OF EVERYTHING YOU EVER -- 479 00:20:23,208 --> 00:20:24,500 EVER WANTED? 480 00:20:24,500 --> 00:20:28,709 I'LL BET IT'S EVEN HARDER AT 58. 481 00:20:30,083 --> 00:20:32,250 [ CHUCKLES ] 482 00:20:37,583 --> 00:20:39,875 HOW ARE YOU? 483 00:20:39,875 --> 00:20:41,000 ARE YOU OKAY? 484 00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:42,834 I'M OKAY. 485 00:20:42,834 --> 00:20:45,625 HOW IS IT, UH, HERE WITH THE NEW GUY? 486 00:20:45,625 --> 00:20:48,917 W-WE'RE STILL FEELING OUR WAY, 487 00:20:48,917 --> 00:20:52,083 BUT I THINK IT'S GOING TO WORK OUT. 488 00:20:52,083 --> 00:20:53,750 I'M GLAD. 489 00:20:53,750 --> 00:20:56,959 YOU DESERVE GOOD THINGS. 490 00:20:56,959 --> 00:20:59,500 WELL... [ LAUGHS ] 491 00:20:59,500 --> 00:21:01,375 HOW'S THE DIVORCE GOING? 492 00:21:01,375 --> 00:21:02,542 OH, GREAT. 493 00:21:02,542 --> 00:21:04,417 BY THE TIME HER LAWYER'S DONE WITH ME, 494 00:21:04,417 --> 00:21:06,166 I MIGHT NOT EVEN HAVE THE ONE BALL LEFT. 495 00:21:06,166 --> 00:21:08,792 OOH. THAT'S NOT WHAT YOU WANT. 496 00:21:08,792 --> 00:21:11,041 [ BOTH LAUGH ] 497 00:21:12,083 --> 00:21:15,125 AND SHE'S STILL WITH THAT ASSHOLE LeBLANC. 498 00:21:15,125 --> 00:21:18,083 HE'S PROBABLY HANGING IN THERE JUST TO PISS ME OFF. 499 00:21:18,083 --> 00:21:20,667 OR IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU. 500 00:21:20,667 --> 00:21:22,041 ENH. 501 00:21:22,041 --> 00:21:24,667 HEY, I STARTED TAKING PILATES. 502 00:21:24,667 --> 00:21:25,875 NO! 503 00:21:25,875 --> 00:21:27,709 YEAH, YEAH. I FUCKING HATE IT. 504 00:21:27,709 --> 00:21:28,834 DON'T FOLD ME. 505 00:21:28,834 --> 00:21:31,041 [ BOTH LAUGH ] 506 00:21:33,583 --> 00:21:36,834 WE SHOULD GET A DRINK SOMETIME, DINNER -- SOMETHING. 507 00:21:38,834 --> 00:21:40,041 NO. 508 00:21:40,041 --> 00:21:41,875 I'M JUST TALKING DINNER. 509 00:21:41,875 --> 00:21:45,083 AND I'M JUST SAYING NO. [ LAUGHS ] 510 00:21:46,625 --> 00:21:48,750 OKAY. THAT'S FAIR. 511 00:21:48,750 --> 00:21:49,917 I GET IT. 512 00:21:49,917 --> 00:21:51,458 ALL RIGHT. 513 00:21:51,458 --> 00:21:53,959 SO, THIS WAS GREAT. 514 00:21:53,959 --> 00:21:56,125 THANKS AGAIN FOR COMING IN. 515 00:21:56,125 --> 00:21:57,583 MY PLEASURE. 516 00:21:57,583 --> 00:21:58,625 MAYBE NEXT TIME, 517 00:21:58,625 --> 00:22:01,250 THE BIG KAHUNA WILL GRACE ME WITH HIS PRESENCE. 518 00:22:01,250 --> 00:22:03,166 I KNOW HE WANTED TO BE HERE. 519 00:22:03,166 --> 00:22:05,166 I'M SORRY HE GOT CALLED AWAY. 520 00:22:05,166 --> 00:22:06,208 NEXT TIME. 521 00:22:06,208 --> 00:22:09,166 WE DON'T NEED TO DO THE GOODBYE HUG. 522 00:22:10,750 --> 00:22:12,458 WHATEVER YOU WANT. 523 00:22:22,834 --> 00:22:24,000 IT'S GONNA BE OKAY. 524 00:22:24,000 --> 00:22:25,375 HOW IS IT GONNA BE OKAY? 525 00:22:25,375 --> 00:22:27,333 I-I CAN'T EVEN BACK OUT NOW. 526 00:22:27,333 --> 00:22:29,333 I'M SORRY, BUT SO YOU'RE ON SECOND? 527 00:22:29,333 --> 00:22:31,166 I DON'T GET WHAT THE BIG DEAL IS. 528 00:22:31,166 --> 00:22:32,917 I DON'T KNOW HOW IT WORKS ON THE LITTLE ISLAND 529 00:22:32,917 --> 00:22:33,834 WHERE YOU COME FROM, 530 00:22:33,834 --> 00:22:36,333 BUT HERE IT SENDS A MESSAGE! 531 00:22:36,333 --> 00:22:39,166 SOMETHING AS STUPID AS COMING OUT SECOND SAYS EVERYTHING. 532 00:22:39,166 --> 00:22:40,875 YOU'RE OVER. YOU'RE ON YOUR WAY OUT. 533 00:22:40,875 --> 00:22:43,041 VIEWERS AREN'T STUPID. SOME OF THEM ARE STUPID. 534 00:22:43,041 --> 00:22:44,959 SOME OF THEM ARE STUPID, BUT MOST OF THEM GET IT. 535 00:22:44,959 --> 00:22:46,834 I DIDN'T EVEN WANT TO DO THIS FUCKING THING 536 00:22:46,834 --> 00:22:48,500 IN THE FIRST PLACE. 537 00:22:48,500 --> 00:22:50,166 THANKS! 538 00:23:03,458 --> 00:23:06,083 WHAT THE... [ SIGHS ] 539 00:23:06,083 --> 00:23:07,583 MOTHERFUCKER! 540 00:23:10,792 --> 00:23:12,333 [ BELL CHIMES ] 541 00:23:15,333 --> 00:23:16,542 HE'S HERE! WHAT? 542 00:23:16,542 --> 00:23:19,000 THAT BASTARD'S HERE, ISN'T HE?! WHO? OH, NO. 543 00:23:19,000 --> 00:23:21,333 DON'T BULLSHIT ME! MEETING OUT OF THE OFFICE?! 544 00:23:21,333 --> 00:23:23,166 I SAW HIS GODDAMN CAR! HANG ON. YOU DON'T WANT TO -- 545 00:23:23,166 --> 00:23:24,667 IS HE IN THERE? I'M SORRY. WHO ARE YOU? 546 00:23:24,667 --> 00:23:26,208 HEY! ASSHOLE! 547 00:23:26,208 --> 00:23:30,250 IF YOU'RE GONNA PISS ON ME, AT LEAST DO IT TO MY FACE! 548 00:23:30,250 --> 00:23:32,417 PLEASE DON'T DO THIS. YEAH. I NEED SECURITY. 549 00:23:32,417 --> 00:23:36,000 YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE THE COMMON COURTESY TO OPEN A DOOR? 550 00:23:36,000 --> 00:23:38,208 [ GRUNTS ] 551 00:23:38,208 --> 00:23:40,542 YOU LISTEN. YOU LISTEN TO ME, YOU PRICK! 552 00:23:40,542 --> 00:23:42,875 SOMEDAY YOU'RE GONNA BE THE ONE STANDING OUT HERE, 553 00:23:42,875 --> 00:23:45,250 AND I HOPE WHOEVER IS IN THERE TREATS YOU 554 00:23:45,250 --> 00:23:47,834 WITH A LITTLE MORE RESPECT THAN YOU ARE TREATING ME! 555 00:23:47,834 --> 00:23:49,083 YOU HEAR ME?! 556 00:23:49,083 --> 00:23:52,041 [ POUNDS ON DOOR ] YOU LITTLE SHIT! 557 00:23:52,041 --> 00:23:55,041 YOU LITTLE SHIT! 558 00:23:55,041 --> 00:23:57,667 YOU GODDAMN WEASEL HIDING IN YOUR LITTLE HOLE! 559 00:23:57,667 --> 00:24:01,417 I MADE THIS NETWORK NUMBER ONE FOR FOUR YEARS. 560 00:24:01,417 --> 00:24:03,083 FOUR YEARS! 561 00:24:03,083 --> 00:24:04,417 LET'S SEE HOW LONG YOU LAST! 562 00:24:04,417 --> 00:24:06,333 YOU'LL BE GONE BEFORE THE COFFEE GETS COLD! 563 00:24:06,333 --> 00:24:08,834 Y-YOU'RE A BLINK. YOU'RE A FOOTNOTE! 564 00:24:08,834 --> 00:24:10,583 AND YOU -- WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? 565 00:24:10,583 --> 00:24:13,041 YOU CAME OUT IN DIGITAL, FOR GOD'S SAKE -- DIGITAL! 566 00:24:13,041 --> 00:24:15,417 WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?! YOU'RE NOTHING! 567 00:24:15,417 --> 00:24:16,917 YOU'RE NOBODY! 568 00:24:16,917 --> 00:24:17,875 FUCK YOU! 569 00:24:17,875 --> 00:24:20,333 FUCK YOU, YOU COCKSUCKER! 570 00:24:20,333 --> 00:24:21,583 [ THUDDING ] 571 00:24:21,583 --> 00:24:22,834 FUCK YOU! 572 00:24:22,834 --> 00:24:24,667 [ GROANS ] 573 00:24:43,458 --> 00:24:46,083 JUST SAW ZAC EFRON. 574 00:24:46,083 --> 00:24:48,083 HE'S LOSING HIS LOOKS. 575 00:24:48,083 --> 00:24:49,917 HOW FAST? 576 00:24:53,750 --> 00:24:55,125 SORRY ABOUT TONIGHT. 577 00:24:55,125 --> 00:24:58,125 IT IS WHAT IT IS. 578 00:24:58,125 --> 00:25:00,500 IT IS WHAT IT IS. 579 00:25:01,667 --> 00:25:03,500 YOU'RE WRONG ABOUT ONE THING. 580 00:25:03,500 --> 00:25:04,667 YEAH? 581 00:25:04,667 --> 00:25:06,500 YOU ARE FAR FROM OVER. 582 00:25:06,500 --> 00:25:08,208 MM. 583 00:25:09,542 --> 00:25:12,792 I THINK I'VE BEEN OVER FOR A WHILE, AND NO ONE BOTHERED TO TELL ME. 584 00:25:12,792 --> 00:25:15,875 IT'S NOT LIKE THEY SEND YOU A THING IN THE MAIL. 585 00:25:17,000 --> 00:25:19,959 YOU DON'T KNOW. "PUCKS" COULD CATCH ON. 586 00:25:19,959 --> 00:25:21,542 NEW NIGHT. 587 00:25:21,542 --> 00:25:22,667 NO? 588 00:25:22,667 --> 00:25:23,792 NAH. 589 00:25:25,333 --> 00:25:28,458 WHAT KILLS ME IS I KNEW WHEN TO QUIT. 590 00:25:28,458 --> 00:25:31,041 I COULD HAVE GONE OUT ON TOP. 591 00:25:31,041 --> 00:25:34,667 IT'S LIKE VEGAS. WHEN YOU HIT IT BIG, WALK AWAY. 592 00:25:34,667 --> 00:25:38,542 DON'T STAY AT THE FUCKING TABLE TILL IT'S ALL GONE. 593 00:25:38,542 --> 00:25:40,875 THE GOOD NEWS IS YOU DON'T ACTUALLY HAVE A GAMBLING PROBLEM. 594 00:25:40,875 --> 00:25:42,125 NO, I DO. REALLY? 595 00:25:42,125 --> 00:25:43,458 KIND OF. AH. 596 00:25:45,041 --> 00:25:48,375 THERE YOU ARE. WE'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU. 597 00:25:48,375 --> 00:25:49,417 WHAT'S THAT? 598 00:25:49,417 --> 00:25:51,500 IT WAS FOR ZAC EFRON. 599 00:25:52,542 --> 00:25:55,667 WHAT? LIKE HE NEEDS MORE FRUIT. 600 00:25:56,875 --> 00:25:57,959 HE'S OUT HERE. 601 00:25:57,959 --> 00:26:00,834 HEY. 602 00:26:00,834 --> 00:26:02,542 Matt: WHAT'S UP? 603 00:26:02,542 --> 00:26:04,333 BAD NEWS. NO SHOW TONIGHT. 604 00:26:04,333 --> 00:26:06,000 WHAT? SORRY. 605 00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:07,834 THEY'RE PRE-EMPTING US. WE JUST HEARD. 606 00:26:07,834 --> 00:26:09,917 THEY'RE DOING A SPECIAL ON THE DEVASTATION IN PERU. 607 00:26:09,917 --> 00:26:12,667 YES! THANK YOU, PERU. 608 00:26:15,583 --> 00:26:18,041 I HAVE CAROL HERE TO SEE YOU. [ INTERCOM BEEPS ] 609 00:26:18,041 --> 00:26:20,208 Castor: OKAY. 610 00:26:20,208 --> 00:26:21,583 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 611 00:26:21,583 --> 00:26:24,709 [ WHIRRING ] 612 00:26:24,709 --> 00:26:28,542 OH! UH, I DIDN'T REALIZE YOU WERE -- I CAN COME BACK. 613 00:26:28,542 --> 00:26:31,417 STAY. I'LL BE DONE IN 22 SECONDS. 614 00:26:31,417 --> 00:26:33,542 ALL RIGHT. 615 00:26:34,542 --> 00:26:35,750 HAND ME A TOWEL. 616 00:26:38,000 --> 00:26:39,208 NO! NOT THAT ONE! 617 00:26:39,208 --> 00:26:40,750 IN THE BATHROOM. 618 00:26:40,750 --> 00:26:43,375 [ GRUNTS ] 619 00:26:43,375 --> 00:26:44,750 THIS ONE BETTER? 620 00:26:44,750 --> 00:26:46,542 [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 621 00:26:46,542 --> 00:26:48,875 [ EXHALES DEEPLY ] 622 00:26:48,875 --> 00:26:51,583 I, UH... 623 00:26:51,583 --> 00:26:54,417 I JUST WANTED TO APOLOGIZE FOR MERC. 624 00:26:54,417 --> 00:26:55,583 YEAH. WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ABOUT? 625 00:26:55,583 --> 00:26:57,417 I KNOW. 626 00:26:57,417 --> 00:27:02,417 I'VE NEVER SEEN HIM LIKE THAT -- WELL, NOT QUITE LIKE THAT. 627 00:27:02,417 --> 00:27:04,709 HE'S GOT ISSUES. YOU THINK? 628 00:27:04,709 --> 00:27:08,750 I KNOW HE SEEMED LIKE A LUNATIC TODAY, BUT... 629 00:27:08,750 --> 00:27:11,625 HE'S NOT A BAD GUY. 630 00:27:11,625 --> 00:27:16,959 HE'S JUST GOING THROUGH A... REALLY HARD TIME AND -- 631 00:27:16,959 --> 00:27:18,667 AND WHAT? 632 00:27:18,667 --> 00:27:21,959 [ Voice breaking] HE MAKES ME SAD. 633 00:27:21,959 --> 00:27:23,875 OH, JESUS. 634 00:27:23,875 --> 00:27:25,166 SORRY. 635 00:27:25,166 --> 00:27:26,959 YOU OKAY? 636 00:27:28,542 --> 00:27:31,583 I'M FINE, REALLY. [ SOBS ] 637 00:27:34,333 --> 00:27:37,250 OH. THANK YOU. 638 00:27:37,250 --> 00:27:39,291 SO EMBARRASSING. 639 00:27:39,291 --> 00:27:43,083 I-I NEVER CRY AT WORK. 640 00:27:44,625 --> 00:27:45,875 WELL, I'D HUG YOU, 641 00:27:45,875 --> 00:27:49,625 BUT, UH, OBVIOUSLY, I'M ALL SWEATY AND -- 642 00:27:50,834 --> 00:27:53,208 THAT'S OKAY. 643 00:27:53,208 --> 00:27:55,250 I DON'T MIND. 644 00:27:55,250 --> 00:27:57,041 YEAH. OKAY. 645 00:27:57,041 --> 00:27:58,792 COME HERE.