1 00:00:12,000 --> 00:00:13,834 IT'S ALL GONNA BE BETTER. YOU'LL SEE. 2 00:00:13,834 --> 00:00:15,500 I'm gonna be better. 3 00:00:15,500 --> 00:00:17,792 [ SIREN WAILS ] 4 00:00:17,792 --> 00:00:19,667 D.U.I.? YOU GOT ME. 5 00:00:19,667 --> 00:00:21,166 LOOKS LIKE WE DID. 6 00:00:21,166 --> 00:00:22,792 [ LAUGHTER ] 7 00:00:22,792 --> 00:00:25,500 CAROL'S GETTING MERC'S JOB. I'M NOT GOOD WITH SECRETS. 8 00:00:25,500 --> 00:00:28,625 ARE YOU SERIOUS? PLEASE, YOU CANNOT REPEAT THIS. 9 00:00:28,625 --> 00:00:30,667 WAIT. SO IT'S NOT CASTOR SOTO? 10 00:00:30,667 --> 00:00:32,166 HMM? 11 00:00:32,166 --> 00:00:35,458 NO, I'VE NEVER MET HIM. BUT COME ON! 12 00:00:35,458 --> 00:00:37,792 [ Laughing ] CASTOR SOTO! 13 00:00:37,792 --> 00:00:40,291 WHAT A COUP. 14 00:00:43,000 --> 00:00:44,709 I SPENT A NIGHT HERE WITH ROB. 15 00:00:45,875 --> 00:00:46,875 WHAT NIGHT? 16 00:00:46,875 --> 00:00:48,625 WEDNESDAY. 17 00:00:48,625 --> 00:00:50,041 OH! 18 00:00:50,041 --> 00:00:52,583 GAH! OH-H-H! 19 00:00:55,417 --> 00:00:58,166 [ TYPEWRITER CLICKING, BELL CHIMES ] 20 00:01:03,709 --> 00:01:05,834 [ WIND WHISTLING ] 21 00:01:08,792 --> 00:01:11,208 [ MID-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ] 22 00:01:35,375 --> 00:01:37,125 [ GUNSHOT ] 23 00:01:45,166 --> 00:01:47,083 YOU... 24 00:01:47,083 --> 00:01:48,458 YOU SLEPT WITH ROB? 25 00:01:48,458 --> 00:01:50,750 YES. 26 00:01:50,750 --> 00:01:52,709 YOU "SLEPT WITH HIM" SLEPT WITH HIM? 27 00:01:52,709 --> 00:01:54,917 I-I... 28 00:01:54,917 --> 00:01:56,875 DID. 29 00:01:58,417 --> 00:02:01,500 YOU ONLY DATED HIM, WHAT -- TWICE? 30 00:02:01,500 --> 00:02:02,750 RIGHT, TWICE. 31 00:02:02,750 --> 00:02:07,458 SO, ON 50% OF YOUR DATES, YOU SLEPT WITH ROB. 32 00:02:07,458 --> 00:02:10,250 OR YOU -- YOU COULD SAY 33 00:02:10,250 --> 00:02:13,834 I ONLY SLEPT WITH HIM ON HALF OUR DATES. 34 00:02:15,875 --> 00:02:17,417 WOW. 35 00:02:17,417 --> 00:02:19,959 WHAT? NOTHING. I JUST... 36 00:02:19,959 --> 00:02:22,250 I NEVER THOUGHT OF YOU AS... 37 00:02:22,250 --> 00:02:23,166 WHAT? 38 00:02:24,709 --> 00:02:25,792 EASY. 39 00:02:25,792 --> 00:02:27,458 [ SCOFFS ] EASY? 40 00:02:27,458 --> 00:02:29,917 WELL, YOU WOULDN'T SLEEP WITH ME UNTIL OUR FIFTH DATE. 41 00:02:29,917 --> 00:02:30,834 YOU WERE MARRIED. 42 00:02:30,834 --> 00:02:32,667 SO ARE WE! 43 00:02:32,667 --> 00:02:35,000 OH, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. 44 00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:36,291 DO NOT GO THERE. 45 00:02:36,291 --> 00:02:41,417 YOU CATEGORICALLY TOLD ME WE WERE OVER. 46 00:02:41,417 --> 00:02:43,041 RIGHT. 47 00:02:43,041 --> 00:02:45,625 IN FACT, THE NIGHT THAT ROB AND I... 48 00:02:45,625 --> 00:02:46,792 N-N-N-N... 49 00:02:46,792 --> 00:02:48,166 I ACTUALLY CALLED 50 00:02:48,166 --> 00:02:50,166 AND ASKED IF YOU WANTED ME TO CANCEL MY DATE. 51 00:02:50,166 --> 00:02:52,333 AND WHAT DID YOU SAY? 52 00:02:52,333 --> 00:02:54,333 "GO. GO." 53 00:02:54,333 --> 00:02:58,500 I MEANT "GO ON A DATE," NOT "GO FUCK HIM"! 54 00:02:58,500 --> 00:02:59,500 [ STAMMERS ] 55 00:02:59,500 --> 00:03:01,375 OH... 56 00:03:01,375 --> 00:03:02,959 GOD! 57 00:03:04,208 --> 00:03:06,083 WHY DID YOU HAVE TO TELL ME? 58 00:03:06,083 --> 00:03:08,625 WOULD YOU RATHER I'D LIED? 59 00:03:08,625 --> 00:03:10,709 MAYBE. WELL, I'M SORRY. 60 00:03:10,709 --> 00:03:13,083 I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D WANT TO SLEEP IN THE SAME BED -- 61 00:03:13,083 --> 00:03:16,166 OH, BELIEVE ME -- WE ARE NOT SLEEPING IN THIS BED. 62 00:03:18,125 --> 00:03:19,375 YAAH! 63 00:03:21,542 --> 00:03:23,166 UGH! 64 00:03:25,500 --> 00:03:27,291 SO WHERE ARE WE GONNA SLEEP? 65 00:03:27,291 --> 00:03:29,500 DON'T KNOW. MAYBE I SHOULD JUST GO HOME. 66 00:03:29,500 --> 00:03:31,583 NO. YOU ARE HOME. 67 00:03:31,583 --> 00:03:35,333 AND WE'RE NOT SPENDING OUR FIRST NIGHT BACK TOGETHER APART. 68 00:03:37,417 --> 00:03:40,625 LOOK, I'M HATING THIS AS MUCH AS YOU ARE... 69 00:03:40,625 --> 00:03:41,959 UH-HUH. 70 00:03:41,959 --> 00:03:44,041 ...BUT WE'VE GOT TO MOVE FORWARD. 71 00:03:44,041 --> 00:03:45,625 WHAT'S DONE IS DONE. 72 00:03:45,625 --> 00:03:48,166 YOU SLEPT WITH MORNING. I SLEPT WITH ROB. 73 00:03:48,166 --> 00:03:50,208 AND MATT. 74 00:03:50,208 --> 00:03:51,709 [ SCOFFS ] 75 00:03:51,709 --> 00:03:53,166 WE'RE STILL COUNTING THAT? 76 00:03:53,166 --> 00:03:54,375 OH, IT COUNTS. 77 00:03:54,375 --> 00:03:56,542 YOU WERE WITH TWO PEOPLE. I WAS ONLY WITH ONE. 78 00:03:56,542 --> 00:04:00,959 TRUE, BUT I SLEPT WITH TWO PEOPLE ONLY ONCE. 79 00:04:00,959 --> 00:04:02,917 YOU WERE WITH ONE PERSON TWICE, 80 00:04:02,917 --> 00:04:05,000 SO, IN EFFECT -- APPLES TO APPLES -- 81 00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:06,125 I THINK WE'RE EVEN. 82 00:04:06,125 --> 00:04:08,500 AND I THINK YOUR MATHS ONLY WORKS 83 00:04:08,500 --> 00:04:10,583 IF YOU'RE FUCKING THE APPLES. 84 00:04:13,959 --> 00:04:16,750 LOOK, I'M JUST TRYING TO HELP US GET THROUGH THIS. 85 00:04:16,750 --> 00:04:18,583 HOW? HOW CAN I GET THROUGH THIS? 86 00:04:18,583 --> 00:04:22,709 MAYBE IF HE WASN'T SO HANDSOME... 87 00:04:24,417 --> 00:04:26,250 WHICH ONE? 88 00:04:26,250 --> 00:04:28,375 BOTH. 89 00:04:29,208 --> 00:04:31,959 HOW CAN I COMPETE WITH THAT? 90 00:04:31,959 --> 00:04:34,458 YOU HAD A WORLD-FAMOUS TV STAR 91 00:04:34,458 --> 00:04:37,208 AND A HUNK THAT DRIVES A TRUCK. 92 00:04:38,250 --> 00:04:40,625 HE DRIVES A TRUCK. 93 00:04:40,625 --> 00:04:41,959 [ CHUCKLES ] 94 00:04:43,250 --> 00:04:45,250 WELL, MORNING'S NO SLOUCH. 95 00:04:45,250 --> 00:04:47,375 AH. SHE'S PROBABLY TWICE AS OLD AS BOTH YOUR GUYS. 96 00:04:47,375 --> 00:04:51,166 EVEN SO, THAT BODY, THOSE BIG TITS -- 97 00:04:51,166 --> 00:04:53,667 OH, YOU DID VERY WELL, MY FRIEND. 98 00:04:53,667 --> 00:04:55,125 I SUPPOSE. 99 00:04:55,125 --> 00:04:56,959 YOU DID. 100 00:04:56,959 --> 00:04:59,917 AND NOW IT'S TIME TO PUT ALL THAT BEHIND US. 101 00:04:59,917 --> 00:05:03,458 WE AGREED -- FRESH START. 102 00:05:06,250 --> 00:05:07,875 FRESH START. 103 00:05:07,875 --> 00:05:09,625 RIGHT? 104 00:05:09,625 --> 00:05:10,834 CLEAN SLATE. 105 00:05:10,834 --> 00:05:12,333 CLEAN SLATE. 106 00:05:16,625 --> 00:05:18,417 [ GROANS ] 107 00:05:19,291 --> 00:05:21,041 WHAT? WHAT ARE YOU THINKING ABOUT? 108 00:05:21,041 --> 00:05:23,291 YOUR DIRTY SLATE. [ GRUMBLES ] 109 00:05:30,625 --> 00:05:33,250 [ RINGTONE PLAYS ] 110 00:05:38,417 --> 00:05:40,083 YO. 111 00:05:40,083 --> 00:05:43,375 MATT, I JUST GOT OFF THE PHONE WITH DIANE'S LAWYER. 112 00:05:43,375 --> 00:05:45,166 OH, FUCK. 113 00:05:45,166 --> 00:05:47,667 HE TOLD ME ABOUT THE D.U.I. 114 00:05:47,667 --> 00:05:51,166 THE D.U.I. WITH THE KIDS IN THE CAR. 115 00:05:51,166 --> 00:05:53,333 GOT TO SAY, DIDN'T SEE THAT COMING. 116 00:05:53,333 --> 00:05:56,333 IT'S BULLSHIT. I WAS SO NOT DRUNK. 117 00:05:56,333 --> 00:05:58,333 BELIEVE ME -- I'VE DRIVEN DRUNK. 118 00:05:58,333 --> 00:05:59,625 I KNOW THE DIFFERENCE. 119 00:05:59,625 --> 00:06:01,583 I HOPE YOU TOLD THE COPS THAT. 120 00:06:01,583 --> 00:06:04,417 DID YOU HAVE ANY ALCOHOL AT ALL? 121 00:06:04,417 --> 00:06:07,041 LIKE TWO GLASSES OF CHAMPAGNE, THREE TOPS. 122 00:06:07,041 --> 00:06:08,542 AND THE BOYS WERE IN THE CAR? 123 00:06:08,542 --> 00:06:11,250 DOES IT HELP THAT I WAS TAKING THEM TO DISNEYLAND? 124 00:06:11,250 --> 00:06:12,375 IT DOES NOT. 125 00:06:12,375 --> 00:06:13,375 [ SIGHS ] 126 00:06:13,375 --> 00:06:15,583 So, what do we do about Diane? 127 00:06:15,583 --> 00:06:17,917 I HAVE NO IDEA. 128 00:06:17,917 --> 00:06:20,500 YOU HAVE NO IDEA? YOU'RE MY LAWYER. 129 00:06:20,500 --> 00:06:23,750 YEAH, WELL, I'M THINKING OF LEAVING THE LAW... 130 00:06:23,750 --> 00:06:25,625 STARTING A ZOO. 131 00:06:25,625 --> 00:06:27,583 BECAUSE I SEEM TO HAVE DISCOVERED 132 00:06:27,583 --> 00:06:29,667 THE ONLY ANIMAL IN THE KNOWN WORLD 133 00:06:29,667 --> 00:06:31,583 THAT CAN ACTUALLY FUCK ITSELF. 134 00:06:31,583 --> 00:06:32,792 WOW. 135 00:06:32,792 --> 00:06:35,583 PLEASE DON'T TAKE THIS THE WRONG WAY, MATT, 136 00:06:35,583 --> 00:06:39,083 BUT YOU ARE THE WORST CLIENT I EVER HAD, SERIOUSLY. 137 00:06:39,083 --> 00:06:40,375 I'D HAPPILY TRADE YOU 138 00:06:40,375 --> 00:06:43,125 FOR TWO MEL GIBSONS AND A TIGER WOODS. 139 00:06:43,125 --> 00:06:44,542 JESUS! 140 00:06:44,542 --> 00:06:46,250 As far as the D.U.I., 141 00:06:46,250 --> 00:06:49,875 THIS IS YOUR FIRST OFFENSE, AMAZINGLY, 142 00:06:49,875 --> 00:06:54,000 SO WE CAN PROBABLY GET YOU OFF WITH A LITTLE COMMUNITY SERVICE. 143 00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:56,917 AS FAR AS DIANE, YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN. 144 00:07:01,041 --> 00:07:03,917 [ SIGHS ] 145 00:07:06,792 --> 00:07:09,709 [ SAWING ] 146 00:07:13,709 --> 00:07:15,250 JESUS! 147 00:07:15,250 --> 00:07:18,166 YEP. THE NEW GUY'S CHANGING EVERYTHING. 148 00:07:18,166 --> 00:07:20,542 TIME TO GET OUT THE OLD RéSUMéS. 149 00:07:20,542 --> 00:07:23,166 WELL, I THINK THAT'S PREMATURE. 150 00:07:23,166 --> 00:07:25,542 I DON'T HAVE A RéSUMé. 151 00:07:27,125 --> 00:07:29,375 HOW DO YOU NOT HAVE A RéSUMé? 152 00:07:29,375 --> 00:07:32,583 THIS IS THE ONLY PLACE I'VE EVER WORKED. 153 00:07:32,583 --> 00:07:36,041 WELL, EXCEPT FOR THE SUMMER AFTER COLLEGE. 154 00:07:36,041 --> 00:07:38,583 I WAS ONE OF THE SNOW WHITES AT DISNEYLAND. 155 00:07:38,583 --> 00:07:40,458 I NEVER KNEW THAT. 156 00:07:40,458 --> 00:07:43,875 I WORKED THE GRAVEYARD SHIFT. 157 00:07:43,875 --> 00:07:45,875 WELL, I THINK IT'S WAY TOO SOON 158 00:07:45,875 --> 00:07:48,250 TO START PACKING UP OUR DESKS. 159 00:07:48,250 --> 00:07:51,375 COME ON. YOU KNOW HE'S GONNA BRING IN HIS OWN PEOPLE. 160 00:07:51,375 --> 00:07:54,333 NO, WE DON'T. WE HAVEN'T EVEN MET HIM YET. 161 00:07:54,333 --> 00:07:56,542 HE MIGHT WANT TO KEEP THINGS INTACT. 162 00:07:56,542 --> 00:07:58,667 SERIOUSLY? AND NOT CLEAN HOUSE? 163 00:07:58,667 --> 00:08:00,542 HE'S THROWING OUT MERC'S TOILET. 164 00:08:00,542 --> 00:08:01,625 MM. 165 00:08:01,625 --> 00:08:02,625 STOP IT. 166 00:08:02,625 --> 00:08:04,417 WE NEED TO STAY POSITIVE. 167 00:08:04,417 --> 00:08:06,000 I HAVE A GOOD FEELING ABOUT THIS. 168 00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:07,959 YOU DO? I DON'T. 169 00:08:07,959 --> 00:08:10,333 WELL, I REALLY DO. 170 00:08:10,333 --> 00:08:12,417 I AM SO FUCKED. 171 00:08:12,417 --> 00:08:15,333 NO WAY THIS GUY ISN'T GONNA CLEAN HOUSE. 172 00:08:15,333 --> 00:08:17,458 WELL, YOU HAVEN'T EVEN MET HIM YET. 173 00:08:17,458 --> 00:08:20,083 I DON'T NEED TO. IT'S WHAT I WOULD DO. 174 00:08:20,083 --> 00:08:22,375 BUT YOU'RE BRILLIANT AT YOUR JOB. 175 00:08:22,375 --> 00:08:24,375 WHY WOULDN'T HE WANT TO KEEP YOU? 176 00:08:24,375 --> 00:08:26,500 BECAUSE I'M BRILLIANT AT IT. 177 00:08:26,500 --> 00:08:28,083 [ SIGHS ] 178 00:08:28,083 --> 00:08:30,208 OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN, BUT -- 179 00:08:30,208 --> 00:08:33,667 YOU NEVER WANT SOMEONE WHO CAN DO YOUR JOB BETTER THAN YOU CAN. 180 00:08:33,667 --> 00:08:36,375 WHY DO YOU THINK I'VE GOT ANDY AND MYRA? 181 00:08:36,375 --> 00:08:38,500 PLUS, IF THIS GUY FINDS OUT 182 00:08:38,500 --> 00:08:41,792 THEY OFFERED ME THE JOB BEFORE HIM, FORGET IT! 183 00:08:41,792 --> 00:08:43,458 FUCKED! 184 00:08:44,583 --> 00:08:45,792 NORMALLY, AT THIS POINT, 185 00:08:45,792 --> 00:08:47,333 I WOULD TRY AND BE ENCOURAGING -- 186 00:08:47,333 --> 00:08:48,625 YEAH, NO POINT IN THAT. 187 00:08:48,625 --> 00:08:50,083 THAT'S WHAT I'M THINKING. 188 00:08:50,083 --> 00:08:51,709 HOW DID THIS HAPPEN? 189 00:08:51,709 --> 00:08:55,000 LAST WEEK, THEY'RE ASKING ME TO RUN THE NETWORK, 190 00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:59,041 AND TOMORROW, I'M GONNA BE BLOWING GUYS JUST TO GET A JOB. 191 00:08:59,041 --> 00:09:00,625 [ SIGHS ] 192 00:09:01,625 --> 00:09:03,208 FIGURATIVELY. OF COURSE. 193 00:09:07,458 --> 00:09:11,709 FOR THE RECORD, I'VE NEVER BLOWN ANYONE FOR A JOB. 194 00:09:11,709 --> 00:09:13,041 IMPRESSIVE! 195 00:09:13,041 --> 00:09:14,709 MM-HMM. 196 00:09:17,375 --> 00:09:19,083 OH, WAIT. THERE WE GO. 197 00:09:19,083 --> 00:09:20,583 WHEN I FIRST STARTED OUT, 198 00:09:20,583 --> 00:09:24,750 I GAVE A HANDJOB TO THE HEAD OF DEVELOPMENT AT NICKELODEON. 199 00:09:24,750 --> 00:09:26,834 NICKELODEON?! 200 00:09:26,834 --> 00:09:29,542 HE WAS AN ADULT. 201 00:09:29,542 --> 00:09:32,041 IT'S FOR KIDS, NOT RUN BY KIDS. 202 00:09:32,041 --> 00:09:33,542 OH. RIGHT. 203 00:09:33,542 --> 00:09:36,208 [ LAUGHING ] 204 00:09:36,208 --> 00:09:38,750 I SUDDENLY HAD AN IMAGE. 205 00:09:38,750 --> 00:09:43,041 YEAH, LIKE I'D JACK OFF SOME 12-YEAR-OLD FOR A JOB. 206 00:09:43,041 --> 00:09:44,709 [ LAUGHING ] 207 00:09:48,458 --> 00:09:50,625 I REALLY DON'T THINK I WOULD. 208 00:09:50,625 --> 00:09:51,750 GOOD. 209 00:09:53,792 --> 00:09:55,417 UNLESS IT WAS LIKE SOME AMAZING -- 210 00:09:55,417 --> 00:09:57,291 STOP TALKING. YEAH, OKAY. 211 00:10:03,458 --> 00:10:05,166 GOOD MORNING. 212 00:10:05,166 --> 00:10:06,083 HEY. 213 00:10:06,083 --> 00:10:07,375 HOW WAS THE WEEKEND? 214 00:10:07,375 --> 00:10:09,166 ALL RIGHT. 215 00:10:09,166 --> 00:10:11,208 WHAT'S THE MATTER? 216 00:10:11,208 --> 00:10:12,917 NOTHING. 217 00:10:12,917 --> 00:10:14,291 BULLSHIT. 218 00:10:14,291 --> 00:10:15,583 WHAT'S GOING ON? 219 00:10:15,583 --> 00:10:18,333 I'D REALLY RATHER NOT DISCUSS IT. 220 00:10:18,333 --> 00:10:20,250 NOT DISCUSS WHAT? 221 00:10:20,250 --> 00:10:23,375 WHEN A PERSON SAYS HE'D REALLY RATHER NOT DISCUSS IT -- 222 00:10:23,375 --> 00:10:24,750 IS IT ABOUT THE SHOW? NO. 223 00:10:24,750 --> 00:10:26,583 SO, THEN...? BELIEVE IT OR NOT, 224 00:10:26,583 --> 00:10:28,625 SOME THINGS ARE NOT YOUR CONCERN. 225 00:10:28,625 --> 00:10:31,166 WELL, TELL ME WHAT IT IS, AND I'LL SEE IF I AGREE. 226 00:10:31,166 --> 00:10:32,583 IS IT, LIKE, SOMETHING SERIOUS? 227 00:10:32,583 --> 00:10:34,291 I'M NOT HAVING THIS CONVERSATION. 228 00:10:34,291 --> 00:10:35,625 YEAH, WE ARE. COME ON. 229 00:10:35,625 --> 00:10:37,667 I CARE. TELL ME. NO! 230 00:10:37,667 --> 00:10:39,291 OKAY, YOU'RE STARTING TO FREAK ME OUT. 231 00:10:39,291 --> 00:10:40,333 IS IT, LIKE, CANCER? 232 00:10:40,333 --> 00:10:42,125 NO, IT IS NOT CANCER. 233 00:10:42,125 --> 00:10:43,458 WELL, I DON'T KNOW. 234 00:10:43,458 --> 00:10:45,625 IS IT -- IS IT BEV? DOES SHE HAVE -- 235 00:10:45,625 --> 00:10:47,750 NO. NO ONE HAS CANCER! 236 00:10:50,417 --> 00:10:52,417 ED HAS CANCER. 237 00:10:52,417 --> 00:10:54,208 WHAT? IT'S OKAY. 238 00:10:54,208 --> 00:10:55,291 YOU DIDN'T KNOW. 239 00:10:55,291 --> 00:10:57,125 JESUS CHRIST. 240 00:10:57,125 --> 00:10:58,959 WHAT IS GOING ON? 241 00:11:00,208 --> 00:11:01,333 SHE SLEPT WITH ROB. 242 00:11:01,333 --> 00:11:03,250 WHO? BEV, MY WIFE. 243 00:11:03,250 --> 00:11:05,125 NO, I KNOW WHO BEV IS. WHO'S ROB? 244 00:11:05,125 --> 00:11:06,709 MORNING'S BROTHER. 245 00:11:06,709 --> 00:11:08,166 WITH THE TRUCK. 246 00:11:08,166 --> 00:11:09,166 WHAT TRUCK? 247 00:11:09,166 --> 00:11:10,792 HE HAD A TRUCK! 248 00:11:11,917 --> 00:11:13,083 ANYWAY, LAST WEEK, 249 00:11:13,083 --> 00:11:14,959 BEFORE WE GOT BACK TOGETHER, 250 00:11:14,959 --> 00:11:16,250 SHE SLEPT WITH HIM. 251 00:11:16,250 --> 00:11:17,917 NO SHIT? 252 00:11:17,917 --> 00:11:19,458 AND SHE TOLD YOU? 253 00:11:19,458 --> 00:11:21,792 TO HER CREDIT, SHE FELT WE NEEDED TO BE HONEST. 254 00:11:21,792 --> 00:11:23,041 WHAT, IS SHE STUPID? 255 00:11:23,041 --> 00:11:25,000 AND THIS WAS GONNA BE YOUR BIG, LIKE, 256 00:11:25,000 --> 00:11:26,500 "FINALLY BACK TOGETHER" WEEKEND? 257 00:11:26,500 --> 00:11:27,667 YEAH. 258 00:11:27,667 --> 00:11:31,041 FOR FANS OF IRONY, IT'S A REAL TREAT. 259 00:11:31,041 --> 00:11:32,792 MAN. 260 00:11:32,792 --> 00:11:35,166 I FIGURED YOU TWO WOULD BE FUCKING LIKE BUNNIES. 261 00:11:35,166 --> 00:11:38,000 MORE LIKE BUNNIES WITH AWKWARD SILENCES AND SULLEN LOOKS. 262 00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:39,667 I ACTUALLY SLEPT ON THE SOFA. 263 00:11:39,667 --> 00:11:41,709 SERIOUSLY? WELL, I DON'T WANT TO SLEEP IN HER BED. 264 00:11:41,709 --> 00:11:43,000 SHE DOESN'T WANT TO SLEEP IN MINE. 265 00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:44,250 THAT'S NOT GOOD FOR THE BUNNIES. 266 00:11:44,250 --> 00:11:45,667 NO. 267 00:11:45,667 --> 00:11:48,125 I'M SURE, EVENTUALLY, WE'LL GET PAST THIS, 268 00:11:48,125 --> 00:11:49,667 BUT OH, MY GOD! 269 00:11:49,667 --> 00:11:50,750 I WAS SO NOT PREPARED 270 00:11:50,750 --> 00:11:52,834 FOR SOMETHING ELSE I HAD TO GET PAST. 271 00:11:52,834 --> 00:11:57,208 I MEAN, IT WOULD BE ONE THING IF HE WAS THE ONLY ONE. 272 00:11:57,208 --> 00:11:59,000 CHRIST. WHO ELSE? 273 00:11:59,834 --> 00:12:02,500 YES, YES. 274 00:12:07,375 --> 00:12:09,709 WE ALL LOVE THE DRAFT. 275 00:12:09,709 --> 00:12:12,333 YOU ARE SO GOOD. 276 00:12:12,333 --> 00:12:13,792 WOW. THANK YOU. 277 00:12:13,792 --> 00:12:15,667 WE REALLY DON'T EVEN HAVE ANY NOTES. 278 00:12:15,667 --> 00:12:17,875 I THINK YOU JUST BECAME MY FAVORITE NETWORK. 279 00:12:17,875 --> 00:12:19,166 [ LAUGHTER ] 280 00:12:19,166 --> 00:12:21,333 JUST A FEW TONE QUESTIONS. 281 00:12:21,333 --> 00:12:23,458 O-KAY. 282 00:12:23,458 --> 00:12:25,375 WE'RE A LITTLE CONCERNED 283 00:12:25,375 --> 00:12:30,041 THAT THE CHARACTERS ALL SEEM A BIT TOO...ANGRY. 284 00:12:30,041 --> 00:12:31,750 OH... 285 00:12:31,750 --> 00:12:34,250 WELL, IT -- IT'S CALLED "ANGRY MEN," SO... 286 00:12:34,250 --> 00:12:36,417 NO, I KNOW, AND WE LOVE IT. 287 00:12:36,417 --> 00:12:38,166 MM. 288 00:12:38,166 --> 00:12:39,792 [ DRILLING, HAMMERING ] 289 00:12:39,792 --> 00:12:42,333 SHOULDN'T WE MAYBE WAIT TILL THE NEW GUY STARTS 290 00:12:42,333 --> 00:12:43,500 AND SEE WHAT HE THINKS? 291 00:12:43,500 --> 00:12:45,083 I THINK WE WANT TO MAKE SURE 292 00:12:45,083 --> 00:12:47,834 HE'S SEEING THE BEST POSSIBLE VERSION OF THIS. 293 00:12:47,834 --> 00:12:49,709 MAYBE THIS IS THE BEST POSSIBLE VERSION. 294 00:12:49,709 --> 00:12:51,542 IT'S NOT. 295 00:12:51,542 --> 00:12:54,333 [ TOOLS CLATTERING ] 296 00:12:54,333 --> 00:12:56,959 I'M GONNA KILL SOMEBODY. 297 00:12:56,959 --> 00:12:59,917 PHEW. THOUGHT THAT WAS JUST HAPPENING IN MY HEAD. 298 00:12:59,917 --> 00:13:01,417 [ CHUCKLES ] 299 00:13:01,417 --> 00:13:03,417 EXCUSE ME A MOMENT. 300 00:13:03,417 --> 00:13:07,375 [ HAMMERING, SAWING ] 301 00:13:11,000 --> 00:13:13,834 OKAY, STOP! 302 00:13:13,834 --> 00:13:15,667 STOP! 303 00:13:15,667 --> 00:13:18,792 [ INHALES DEEPLY ] I KNOW YOU HAVE JOBS TO DO, 304 00:13:18,792 --> 00:13:22,291 BUT SO DO WE, AND IT'S JUST -- IT'S -- IT'S IMPOSSIBLE! 305 00:13:22,291 --> 00:13:23,834 SERIOUSLY! ENOUGH! 306 00:13:23,834 --> 00:13:27,041 HOW MANY FUCKING BOOKSHELVES DOES THIS GUY NEED?! 307 00:13:27,041 --> 00:13:29,834 IT'S TRUE. I HEARD HE CAN'T EVEN READ. 308 00:13:29,834 --> 00:13:32,000 [ CHUCKLES ] 309 00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:34,959 NO ONE TOLD US YOU WERE COMING IN TODAY. 310 00:13:34,959 --> 00:13:38,166 I'D HAVE PREPARED A MORE EMBARRASSING WAY TO MEET YOU. 311 00:13:38,166 --> 00:13:40,125 I DON'T KNOW. YOU SET THE BAR PRETTY HIGH. 312 00:13:40,125 --> 00:13:41,792 OH. [ LAUGHS NERVOUSLY ] 313 00:13:41,792 --> 00:13:43,291 THAT'S FUNNY. 314 00:13:43,291 --> 00:13:44,458 I'M CAROL -- 315 00:13:44,458 --> 00:13:45,792 RANCE. I KNOW. 316 00:13:45,792 --> 00:13:47,709 I JUST CAME IN TO LOOK AT THE SPACE. 317 00:13:47,709 --> 00:13:49,041 HOW ARE YOU WITH DECORATING? 318 00:13:49,041 --> 00:13:51,083 UH, TRY ME. 319 00:13:51,083 --> 00:13:52,208 OKAY. 320 00:13:52,208 --> 00:13:53,959 WHEN YOU WERE THINKING OF TAKING THIS JOB, 321 00:13:53,959 --> 00:13:55,458 WHERE WERE YOU GONNA PUT YOUR DESK? 322 00:13:58,208 --> 00:13:59,500 UH... 323 00:13:59,500 --> 00:14:03,291 I ALWAYS THOUGHT HERE. 324 00:14:03,291 --> 00:14:06,166 SO YOU COULD SEE THE VIEW... 325 00:14:06,166 --> 00:14:08,500 PLUS IT'S MORE CONVENIENT FOR JUMPING. 326 00:14:08,500 --> 00:14:10,458 CLEARLY, YOU'VE GIVEN THIS SOME THOUGHT. 327 00:14:10,458 --> 00:14:11,709 I HAVE. 328 00:14:11,709 --> 00:14:13,000 JUST SO YOU KNOW... MM. 329 00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:15,333 ...THE REASON I DIDN'T TAKE THE JOB IS, 330 00:14:15,333 --> 00:14:17,792 I REALLY THINK I'M AT MY BEST 331 00:14:17,792 --> 00:14:20,667 WHEN I'M SUPPORTING SOMEONE ELSE. 332 00:14:20,667 --> 00:14:23,041 I'M A GREAT NUMBER TWO. 333 00:14:23,041 --> 00:14:25,667 YEAH, I DON'T WANT A GREAT NUMBER TWO. 334 00:14:25,667 --> 00:14:27,208 SURE. 335 00:14:27,208 --> 00:14:29,583 I GET THAT. 336 00:14:29,583 --> 00:14:31,542 I WANT A PARTNER. 337 00:14:43,583 --> 00:14:45,542 [ DOOR KNOCKER BANGS ] 338 00:14:47,166 --> 00:14:49,291 HEY, MERTALA. IS SHE HERE? 339 00:14:49,291 --> 00:14:50,333 Diane: WHO IS IT?! 340 00:14:50,333 --> 00:14:52,041 IT'S MR. MATT! 341 00:14:52,041 --> 00:14:53,750 TELL HIM TO GO THE FUCK AWAY! 342 00:14:53,750 --> 00:14:55,458 THAT'S WHAT SHE SAYS. 343 00:14:55,458 --> 00:14:57,834 I JUST WANT TO TALK TO YOU FOR A MINUTE! 344 00:14:57,834 --> 00:15:00,417 TELL HIM, NO, HE'S AN ASSHOLE. 345 00:15:00,417 --> 00:15:02,041 THAT, TOO. 346 00:15:07,458 --> 00:15:09,250 DON'T EVEN START. 347 00:15:09,250 --> 00:15:10,792 I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING YET. 348 00:15:10,792 --> 00:15:12,500 I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GONNA SAY. 349 00:15:12,500 --> 00:15:13,750 NO, YOU DON'T. 350 00:15:13,750 --> 00:15:15,834 BULLSHIT. FIRST, YOU'LL DENY IT. 351 00:15:15,834 --> 00:15:17,417 THEN YOU'LL LIE ABOUT IT. 352 00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:19,041 THEN YOU'LL SAY YOU'RE SORRY 353 00:15:19,041 --> 00:15:21,959 AND SWEAR IT'LL NEVER, EVER, EVER HAPPEN AGAIN. 354 00:15:21,959 --> 00:15:24,291 THEN [GASPS] IT HAPPENS AGAIN. 355 00:15:28,000 --> 00:15:29,667 YOU'RE MAKING MY SAUCE? 356 00:15:29,667 --> 00:15:31,417 I'M MAKING SAUCE. 357 00:15:31,417 --> 00:15:33,208 PUT THE BUTTER IN YET? 358 00:15:33,208 --> 00:15:35,208 NO, 'CAUSE IT'S NOT YOUR SAUCE. 359 00:15:35,208 --> 00:15:36,542 IT'S BETTER WITH THE BUTTER. 360 00:15:36,542 --> 00:15:37,750 I'M NOT PUTTING YOUR FUCKING BUTTER IN. 361 00:15:37,750 --> 00:15:40,000 HEY, I GET IT. YOU'RE MAD. 362 00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:41,542 BUT DON'T BLAME THE BUTTER. 363 00:15:44,166 --> 00:15:47,208 LOOK, THIS WHOLE D.U.I. THING IS BULLSHIT. 364 00:15:47,208 --> 00:15:51,125 YOU WERE ARRESTED FOR DRIVING DRUNK WITH OUR KIDS IN THE CAR. 365 00:15:51,125 --> 00:15:54,291 WELL, WHEN YOU SAY IT LIKE THAT, YEAH, IT SOUNDS TERRIBLE. 366 00:15:54,291 --> 00:15:57,250 I HAD A COUPLE GLASSES OF CHAMPAGNE. 367 00:15:57,250 --> 00:15:59,083 YOU TELL ME YOU NEVER HAD A FEW DRINKS 368 00:15:59,083 --> 00:16:00,250 AND THEN DROVE THE KIDS? 369 00:16:00,250 --> 00:16:02,458 I KNOW YOU DID. YOU JUST NEVER GOT CAUGHT. 370 00:16:02,458 --> 00:16:04,542 YEAH, WELL, NOT ANYMORE. 371 00:16:04,542 --> 00:16:06,208 I HAVEN'T HAD A DRINK IN SIX WEEKS. 372 00:16:06,208 --> 00:16:07,625 WHY? 373 00:16:07,625 --> 00:16:09,083 SOMEBODY'S GOT TO BE A GROWN-UP, 374 00:16:09,083 --> 00:16:10,291 AND CLEARLY, IT'S NOT YOU. 375 00:16:10,291 --> 00:16:12,583 UH...GROWN-UPS DRINK. 376 00:16:12,583 --> 00:16:14,709 I'VE BEEN SEEING SOMEONE. 377 00:16:14,709 --> 00:16:16,458 [ SIZZLING ] 378 00:16:16,458 --> 00:16:18,458 LIKE... 379 00:16:18,458 --> 00:16:19,375 A SHRINK? 380 00:16:19,375 --> 00:16:21,083 LIKE A GUY. 381 00:16:21,083 --> 00:16:22,792 WHO? YOU DON'T KNOW HIM. 382 00:16:22,792 --> 00:16:23,750 AND HE DOESN'T DRINK? 383 00:16:23,750 --> 00:16:25,792 HE'S BEEN SOBER FOR 15 YEARS. 384 00:16:25,792 --> 00:16:27,125 SOUNDS HORRIBLE. 385 00:16:28,166 --> 00:16:30,125 WAIT. IS THAT WHOSE CAR IS OUT FRONT? YEAH. 386 00:16:30,125 --> 00:16:31,750 I'M ON A WAITING LIST FOR ONE OF THOSE. 387 00:16:31,750 --> 00:16:33,250 HOW'D HE GET IT? HE'S A DEALER. 388 00:16:33,250 --> 00:16:34,208 DRUGS? 389 00:16:34,208 --> 00:16:36,125 CARS. 390 00:16:36,125 --> 00:16:37,250 ASSHOLE. 391 00:16:38,417 --> 00:16:39,959 SO, WHERE IS HE? 392 00:16:39,959 --> 00:16:41,750 HE TOOK THE BOYS FOR A BIKE RIDE. 393 00:16:41,750 --> 00:16:44,125 HE'S ALONE WITH THE BOYS? SO? 394 00:16:44,125 --> 00:16:46,458 SO YOU'RE GIVING ME SHIT ABOUT MY PARENTING SKILLS, 395 00:16:46,458 --> 00:16:49,417 AND SOME TOTAL STRANGER IS OFF WITH -- HE'S NOT A TOTAL STRANGER. 396 00:16:49,417 --> 00:16:51,166 YEAH? WELL, HOW WELL DO YOU KNOW THIS GUY? WELL. 397 00:16:51,166 --> 00:16:53,291 HOW WELL? WELL ENOUGH THAT WE'RE GETTING MARRIED. 398 00:16:54,917 --> 00:16:58,291 THAT'S...PRETTY DAMN WELL. 399 00:17:01,333 --> 00:17:03,709 SO, WHEN YOU SAY YOU WANT A PARTNER -- 400 00:17:03,709 --> 00:17:05,583 YEAH, THAT'S NOT EXACTLY TRUE. 401 00:17:05,583 --> 00:17:07,041 I DON'T WANT A PARTNER. 402 00:17:07,041 --> 00:17:08,166 AH. 403 00:17:10,417 --> 00:17:12,000 I WANT YOU AS MY PARTNER. 404 00:17:12,959 --> 00:17:14,125 I'VE HEARD GOOD THINGS. 405 00:17:14,125 --> 00:17:16,125 I WANT TO FIND OUT IF THEY'RE TRUE. 406 00:17:16,125 --> 00:17:19,583 IF THEY'RE GOOD, THEY'RE DEFINITELY TRUE. 407 00:17:19,583 --> 00:17:21,208 [ LAUGHS NERVOUSLY ] 408 00:17:21,208 --> 00:17:23,291 WHAT SCARES YOU MOST? DON'T THINK. JUST ANSWER. 409 00:17:23,291 --> 00:17:24,333 BEES. 410 00:17:24,333 --> 00:17:26,792 YOU KNOW WHAT SCARES ME? MEDIOCRITY. 411 00:17:26,792 --> 00:17:29,208 SAFE CHOICES, HEDGED BETS, 412 00:17:29,208 --> 00:17:32,375 A WILLINGNESS TO SETTLE FOR THE EASY AND FAMILIAR. 413 00:17:32,375 --> 00:17:33,709 [ CLEARS THROAT ] 414 00:17:33,709 --> 00:17:37,166 I WOULD REALLY LIKE TO TAKE BACK "BEES." 415 00:17:41,041 --> 00:17:43,375 GEEZ. MARRIED? 416 00:17:43,375 --> 00:17:45,041 I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW YOU WERE DATING. 417 00:17:45,041 --> 00:17:46,333 'CAUSE IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. 418 00:17:46,333 --> 00:17:49,500 YOU DON'T TELL ME WHEN YOU'RE SCREWING YOUR STALKER. 419 00:17:51,583 --> 00:17:54,083 HEY, CAREFUL. THEY'RE STARTING TO GET TOO SMALL. OH, RIGHT. 420 00:17:54,083 --> 00:17:55,792 MR. BIG BALLS. I'M JUST SAYING, 421 00:17:55,792 --> 00:17:57,709 THEY'RE GONNA DRY OUT WHEN YOU FRY THEM. 422 00:17:57,709 --> 00:18:00,208 I'M BAKING THEM. OH, YOU'RE KILLING ME. 423 00:18:03,166 --> 00:18:05,750 SO, UH, HOW'D YOU GET THE KIDS NOT TO TELL ME? 424 00:18:05,750 --> 00:18:08,250 REALLY? THE NEVER MENTIONED OLLIE? 425 00:18:08,250 --> 00:18:10,834 WAIT. THIS GUY'S OLLIE? 426 00:18:10,834 --> 00:18:13,208 THEY FUCKING TALK ABOUT OLLIE ALL THE TIME. 427 00:18:13,208 --> 00:18:14,917 I THOUGHT THEY MADE HIM UP. 428 00:18:14,917 --> 00:18:17,750 WHAT? IT'S ALWAYS LIKE, "WE WENT TO THE ZOO WITH OLLIE. 429 00:18:17,750 --> 00:18:19,834 WE BUILT A FORT WITH OLLIE." 430 00:18:19,834 --> 00:18:21,208 "YEAH, OKAY." 431 00:18:21,208 --> 00:18:22,959 [ CHUCKLES ] 432 00:18:22,959 --> 00:18:24,917 NOPE. HE'S REAL. 433 00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:27,792 AND HE'S REALLY ALL RIGHT? 434 00:18:27,792 --> 00:18:29,583 NO, I'M GONNA MARRY SOME DOUCHEBAG. 435 00:18:29,583 --> 00:18:31,500 UH, HELLO? 436 00:18:31,500 --> 00:18:33,250 HE'S A GOOD GUY. 437 00:18:33,250 --> 00:18:35,208 WELL, HE BETTER BE. HE IS. 438 00:18:35,208 --> 00:18:38,417 HE'S GOOD WITH THE BOYS. HE LIKES MY MOTHER. 439 00:18:38,417 --> 00:18:40,041 HE LIKES YOUR MOTHER? 440 00:18:40,917 --> 00:18:42,375 SOBER? 441 00:18:42,375 --> 00:18:43,291 GO FIGURE. 442 00:18:51,542 --> 00:18:54,583 PAIN IN THE ASS. 443 00:19:01,375 --> 00:19:03,583 WELL, YOU KNOW, 444 00:19:03,583 --> 00:19:06,291 IF I DON'T LIKE HIM, THIS WHOLE THING IS OFF. 445 00:19:06,291 --> 00:19:07,291 RIGHT. 446 00:19:07,291 --> 00:19:09,250 SERIOUSLY. OKAY. 447 00:19:17,625 --> 00:19:18,917 BETTER, RIGHT? 448 00:19:20,125 --> 00:19:22,834 [ CHUCKLES ] YOU KNOW IT'S BETTER. 449 00:19:24,375 --> 00:19:26,625 MMM, MMM. [ CHUCKLES ] 450 00:19:30,709 --> 00:19:32,458 FUCK RATINGS. 451 00:19:32,458 --> 00:19:33,834 I DON'T CARE ABOUT RATINGS. 452 00:19:33,834 --> 00:19:35,375 WELL, THAT'S EASY TO SAY -- 453 00:19:35,375 --> 00:19:37,834 I DON'T. I DON'T CARE IF WE FAIL. 454 00:19:37,834 --> 00:19:39,375 FAILING'S FINE! 455 00:19:39,375 --> 00:19:42,542 IF WE GO DOWN IN FLAMES, AT LEAST THERE WERE FLAMES! 456 00:19:42,542 --> 00:19:43,792 WOW. 457 00:19:43,792 --> 00:19:46,041 IF WE'RE GONNA DO THIS, I WANT TO DO TV 458 00:19:46,041 --> 00:19:50,041 THAT'S BOLD AND THRILLING AND DANGEROUS! 459 00:19:50,041 --> 00:19:51,667 I CAN BE DANGEROUS. 460 00:19:52,750 --> 00:19:55,000 I-I CAN. 461 00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:56,291 YOU DON'T SEEM DANGEROUS. 462 00:19:56,291 --> 00:19:59,458 THAT'S WHAT MAKES ME SO DANGEROUS. 463 00:19:59,458 --> 00:20:01,583 [ TONGUE CLICKS ] 464 00:20:01,583 --> 00:20:03,291 I LIKE YOU. 465 00:20:05,083 --> 00:20:06,542 I LIKE YOU, TOO. 466 00:20:06,542 --> 00:20:09,583 I THINK YOU ARE SO MUCH MORE THAN YOU'VE BEEN ALLOWED TO BE. 467 00:20:09,583 --> 00:20:11,208 REALLY? 468 00:20:11,208 --> 00:20:13,208 YOU NEED TO STOP TRYING TO PLEASE PEOPLE. 469 00:20:13,208 --> 00:20:14,709 CAN YOU DO THAT? 470 00:20:14,709 --> 00:20:17,000 IF THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT. 471 00:20:28,291 --> 00:20:30,917 I DON'T THINK SHE'S COMING BACK. 472 00:20:36,875 --> 00:20:39,458 AMAZING. SHE GAVE YOU ANOTHER CHANCE? 473 00:20:39,458 --> 00:20:40,792 YOU ARE AN EVIL GENIUS. 474 00:20:40,792 --> 00:20:42,125 YOU'RE TOO KIND. 475 00:20:42,125 --> 00:20:44,583 AND YOU'RE OKAY WITH HER GETTING MARRIED AGAIN? 476 00:20:44,583 --> 00:20:46,542 YEAH. WHY NOT? 477 00:20:46,542 --> 00:20:48,792 YOUR EX-WIFE EVER REMARRY? NO. 478 00:20:48,792 --> 00:20:51,041 I LIKE TO THINK SHE EXHAUSTED ALL HER MISERY ON ME 479 00:20:51,041 --> 00:20:52,291 AND THEN LEFT THE BUSINESS. 480 00:20:52,291 --> 00:20:54,458 SO I'M GUESSING YOU DON'T MISS HER. 481 00:20:54,458 --> 00:20:55,583 NO. 482 00:20:55,583 --> 00:20:58,041 I DO MISS MY CURRENT WIFE. 483 00:20:58,041 --> 00:21:00,250 YEAH, YOU GUYS ARE IDIOTS. 484 00:21:00,250 --> 00:21:01,417 THANK YOU. 485 00:21:01,417 --> 00:21:04,000 SO, WHAT, YOU'RE JUST NEVER GONNA HAVE SEX AGAIN? 486 00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:05,458 PROBABLY NOT. 487 00:21:05,458 --> 00:21:07,250 IT'S FUNNY. YOU KNOW, I NEVER HAD A PROBLEM 488 00:21:07,250 --> 00:21:08,875 SCREWING IN A BED WHERE ANOTHER GUY'S BEEN. 489 00:21:08,875 --> 00:21:10,083 YOU'VE NEVER HAD A PROBLEM 490 00:21:10,083 --> 00:21:12,041 SCREWING IN A WOMAN WHERE ANOTHER GUY'S BEEN. 491 00:21:14,542 --> 00:21:18,667 YOU TOLD HIM YOU WERE DANGEROUS? 492 00:21:18,667 --> 00:21:21,583 YOU'RE SO NON-DANGEROUS. 493 00:21:21,583 --> 00:21:22,875 I KNOW! 494 00:21:22,875 --> 00:21:25,250 [ BOTH LAUGH ] 495 00:21:25,250 --> 00:21:30,709 BUT I SWEAR, WITH HIM, I FEEL LIKE I COULD BE. 496 00:21:30,709 --> 00:21:32,208 [ Laughing ] MM-HMM. 497 00:21:33,792 --> 00:21:37,625 THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT HIM THAT'S SO DYNAMIC. 498 00:21:37,625 --> 00:21:39,125 THIS CONFIDENCE -- 499 00:21:39,125 --> 00:21:42,041 I HAVE NOT FELT THIS EXCITED ABOUT WORK 500 00:21:42,041 --> 00:21:44,000 IN I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG. 501 00:21:44,000 --> 00:21:46,500 DEAR GOD -- EXHALE. 502 00:21:46,500 --> 00:21:48,458 [ COUGHING ] 503 00:21:48,458 --> 00:21:50,041 OH. OH! 504 00:21:50,041 --> 00:21:51,625 AND LET ME TELL YOU... 505 00:21:51,625 --> 00:21:54,000 [ Southern accent ] ...IS THAT BOY EASY ON THE EYES. 506 00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:56,083 DON'T. [ Normal voice ] I KNOW -- DON'T DO VOICES. 507 00:21:56,083 --> 00:21:57,250 THANK YOU. 508 00:21:57,250 --> 00:22:01,291 SERIOUSLY, HE IS HOT. [ CHUCKLES ] 509 00:22:01,291 --> 00:22:04,125 OBVIOUSLY, I WOULD NEVER GO THERE. 510 00:22:04,125 --> 00:22:06,750 PLEASE. YOU KEEP AN APARTMENT THERE. 511 00:22:06,750 --> 00:22:08,959 NOPE. NOT GONNA HAPPEN. 512 00:22:08,959 --> 00:22:12,333 I'M HAPPY JUST TO BE AROUND HIM, 513 00:22:12,333 --> 00:22:16,709 TO WORK WITH HIM, TO LEARN FROM HIM. 514 00:22:17,875 --> 00:22:20,500 HE IS AMAZING. 515 00:22:20,500 --> 00:22:24,375 I HEAR MYSELF TALKING TO THESE PEOPLE, AND... 516 00:22:24,375 --> 00:22:27,000 THEY'RE LISTENING TO ME. 517 00:22:27,000 --> 00:22:30,959 I MEAN, REALLY LISTENING AND NODDING. 518 00:22:32,667 --> 00:22:37,375 AND NO ONE SEEMS TO NOTICE I'M SO FULL OF SHIT. 519 00:22:38,667 --> 00:22:41,500 LIKE, THIS ONE WOMAN WAS JUST EATING IT UP. 520 00:22:41,500 --> 00:22:44,959 AND, ON ONE HAND, I FELT RELIEVED 521 00:22:44,959 --> 00:22:48,208 'CAUSE, YOU KNOW, I WAS GETTING AWAY WITH IT. 522 00:22:49,500 --> 00:22:52,458 BUT AT THE SAME TIME... 523 00:22:52,458 --> 00:22:54,792 I FELT SUCH... 524 00:22:56,667 --> 00:22:59,333 ...CONTEMPT FOR HER. 525 00:23:01,458 --> 00:23:04,041 AND THEN THINGS STARTED REALLY GETTING BAD. 526 00:23:05,709 --> 00:23:08,166 THE WORDS I WAS SAYING 527 00:23:08,166 --> 00:23:11,417 DIDN'T EVEN SOUND LIKE WORDS ANYMORE. 528 00:23:11,417 --> 00:23:14,250 AND THEN THE WALLS STARTED MAKING THAT NOISE, 529 00:23:14,250 --> 00:23:16,208 AND I JUST HAD TO GET OUT OF THERE. 530 00:23:16,208 --> 00:23:17,333 SO I'M SITTING IN MY CAR, 531 00:23:17,333 --> 00:23:19,667 AND I'M JUST -- [ BREATHES DEEPLY ] -- 532 00:23:19,667 --> 00:23:21,542 JUST TRYING TO BREATHE. 533 00:23:21,542 --> 00:23:25,291 AND IT'S LIKE I'M... 534 00:23:25,291 --> 00:23:29,166 I'M BREATHING INK. 535 00:23:30,542 --> 00:23:34,625 AND THEN I BECOME THE INK. 536 00:23:34,625 --> 00:23:38,375 I'M LIKE THIS ME-SHAPED BAG 537 00:23:38,375 --> 00:23:43,375 OF BLACK, VISCOUS INK. 538 00:23:43,375 --> 00:23:46,041 AND EVEN NOW, AS I'M TALKING TO YOU, 539 00:23:46,041 --> 00:23:48,500 I STILL FEEL... 540 00:23:48,500 --> 00:23:50,458 KIND OF GELATINOUS. 541 00:23:52,083 --> 00:23:57,291 AND I'M CONSUMED WITH AN UNBEARABLE SELF-LOATHING. 542 00:23:58,542 --> 00:24:01,542 AND I CAN HEAR THE FURNITURE WHISPERING. 543 00:24:05,625 --> 00:24:08,375 MAYBE WE SHOULD TRY ADJUSTING YOUR MEDICATION AGAIN. 544 00:24:10,667 --> 00:24:12,917 MAYBE. 545 00:24:16,667 --> 00:24:17,959 [ DOOR CLOSES ] 546 00:24:17,959 --> 00:24:19,834 [ SNIFFS ] 547 00:24:19,834 --> 00:24:23,458 I'M GUESSING EITHER CAROL OR WILLIE NELSON WAS HERE. 548 00:24:23,458 --> 00:24:25,583 [ CHUCKLING ] THAT BAD? 549 00:24:25,583 --> 00:24:27,083 NOT IF YOU'RE IN A REGGAE BAND. [ CHUCKLES ] 550 00:24:28,750 --> 00:24:31,625 SO, LISTEN, I, UM... 551 00:24:31,625 --> 00:24:34,166 I'M THINKING OF STAYING AT MY PLACE TONIGHT. 552 00:24:34,166 --> 00:24:35,458 WHAT? NO. 553 00:24:35,458 --> 00:24:37,583 I'LL JUST OPEN SOME WINDOWS. IT'S NOT THAT. 554 00:24:37,583 --> 00:24:39,417 I JUST THINK... 555 00:24:39,417 --> 00:24:41,333 IT MIGHT BE EASIER IF I'M IN MY PLACE. 556 00:24:41,333 --> 00:24:44,500 STOP SAYING "YOUR PLACE." THIS IS YOUR PLACE. 557 00:24:44,500 --> 00:24:46,417 IS IT? 558 00:24:51,125 --> 00:24:52,625 WHAT ARE WE DOING? 559 00:24:54,959 --> 00:24:56,625 DON'T KNOW. 560 00:24:56,625 --> 00:24:59,917 THERE'S NO VERSION OF THIS THAT FEELS RIGHT. 561 00:25:03,250 --> 00:25:05,125 [ DOORBELL RINGS ] 562 00:25:09,875 --> 00:25:12,000 Man: I'M LOOKING FOR SEAN OR BEVERLY LINCOLN? 563 00:25:12,000 --> 00:25:14,375 YES? WE GOT A DELIVERY HERE. 564 00:25:14,375 --> 00:25:15,625 WHERE DO YOU WANT IT? 565 00:25:26,375 --> 00:25:29,834 YOU LIKE IT? THEY TOLD ME NOBODY'S FUCKED ON IT YET. 566 00:25:29,834 --> 00:25:30,834 OH, IT'S AMAZING! 567 00:25:30,834 --> 00:25:32,333 IT'S BRILLIANT! THANK YOU. 568 00:25:32,333 --> 00:25:33,625 SERIOUSLY, AN EVIL GENIUS. 569 00:25:33,625 --> 00:25:34,834 WELL, SLEEP TIGHT, YOU GUYS. 570 00:25:34,834 --> 00:25:36,041 OR DON'T. 571 00:25:36,041 --> 00:25:37,834 OKAY. THANK YOU. 572 00:25:37,834 --> 00:25:39,917 NIGHT-NIGHT. THANKS AGAIN! 573 00:25:39,917 --> 00:25:40,834 BYE. 574 00:25:42,458 --> 00:25:44,667 THIS IS INSANE! 575 00:25:44,667 --> 00:25:45,875 I KNOW! FEEL THIS! 576 00:25:45,875 --> 00:25:47,125 HA HA! 577 00:25:47,125 --> 00:25:48,875 I'D RATHER FEEL THIS. 578 00:25:53,208 --> 00:25:56,000 CLEAN SLATE, BABY! 579 00:25:56,000 --> 00:25:57,709 CLEAN SLATE! 580 00:25:57,709 --> 00:25:59,792 NO MORE GHOSTS. 581 00:25:59,792 --> 00:26:01,125 NO. 582 00:26:01,125 --> 00:26:04,041 BYE-BYE, ROB, WITH YOUR BIG, STUPID TRUCK! 583 00:26:04,041 --> 00:26:05,458 SO LONG, MORNING! 584 00:26:05,458 --> 00:26:07,542 DON'T LET THE DOOR HIT YOUR TITS ON THE WAY OUT! 585 00:26:07,542 --> 00:26:08,792 SEE YOU AROUND, MATT! 586 00:26:08,792 --> 00:26:11,834 DON'T TRIP ON YOUR -- YOUR GIANT DICK! 587 00:26:11,834 --> 00:26:14,125 [ BOTH LAUGH ] 588 00:26:14,125 --> 00:26:18,875 YOUR...GIANT DICK. 589 00:26:18,875 --> 00:26:20,500 [ CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY ] 590 00:26:26,083 --> 00:26:28,375 [ BOTH LAUGH ] 591 00:26:35,083 --> 00:26:37,083 I'M EXHAUSTED. 592 00:26:37,083 --> 00:26:39,959 [ CHUCKLES ] 593 00:26:41,208 --> 00:26:43,333 LONG DAY. 594 00:26:43,333 --> 00:26:46,041 LONG WEEK. VERY. 595 00:26:48,458 --> 00:26:50,834 OH, THIS DOES FEEL LIKE HEAVEN. 596 00:26:50,834 --> 00:26:53,583 SHOULD COME WITH A WARNING -- "MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS." 597 00:26:53,583 --> 00:26:55,667 "DO NOT OPERATE HEAVY MACHINERY." 598 00:26:55,667 --> 00:26:58,709 [ BOTH CHUCKLE ] 599 00:26:58,709 --> 00:27:00,875 MM. 600 00:27:03,625 --> 00:27:05,500 ANYWAY... YEAH. 601 00:27:05,500 --> 00:27:09,000 MM. FRESH SHEETS. 602 00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:11,291 MM. YEAH, REAL FRESH. 603 00:27:21,959 --> 00:27:23,792 WELL, SLEEP TIGHT. 604 00:27:23,792 --> 00:27:24,917 YOU TOO. 605 00:27:29,667 --> 00:27:31,458 NIGHT. 606 00:27:31,458 --> 00:27:33,250 NIGHT. 607 00:27:47,625 --> 00:27:49,834 LOVE YOU. 608 00:27:52,125 --> 00:27:54,792 LOVE YOU, TOO.