1 00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:14,500 Can we speak later? 2 00:00:14,500 --> 00:00:19,291 Who are you with? (HESITATING) I'm, uh... I'm actually on a... 3 00:00:19,917 --> 00:00:20,959 Date. 4 00:00:22,291 --> 00:00:27,250 It's not just that people don't like Pucks! The dog show is killing us. 5 00:00:27,250 --> 00:00:29,000 We had that cock-sucking dog! 6 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:30,333 How did we let it go? 7 00:00:30,333 --> 00:00:33,166 You said, "If anyone wants to pay for that piece of shit, 8 00:00:33,166 --> 00:00:34,041 "let them have it." 9 00:00:34,959 --> 00:00:36,208 Sounds like me. 10 00:00:36,208 --> 00:00:38,500 Guess who dropped by the boys' school this afternoon. 11 00:00:38,500 --> 00:00:39,792 I give up. 12 00:00:39,792 --> 00:00:42,083 How about your fucking stalker! 13 00:00:42,542 --> 00:00:44,125 Oh, shit. 14 00:00:44,125 --> 00:00:47,041 If that fucking lunatic comes near my kids again, I swear to God... 15 00:00:47,458 --> 00:00:49,250 I came as soon as I got your message. 16 00:00:49,583 --> 00:00:52,667 I love you so much. I know. 17 00:01:08,500 --> 00:01:10,083 (WIND WHISTLING) 18 00:01:10,083 --> 00:01:11,667 (WIND HOWLING) 19 00:01:12,417 --> 00:01:14,166 (TYPEWRITER CLACKING) 20 00:01:39,041 --> 00:01:40,208 (GUNSHOT) 21 00:02:00,166 --> 00:02:01,208 (GROANS) 22 00:02:05,458 --> 00:02:07,792 Ah, fuck. 23 00:02:11,792 --> 00:02:13,083 Does this smell bad? 24 00:02:13,500 --> 00:02:14,792 Oh, yes. 25 00:02:14,792 --> 00:02:17,166 Have you seen this? No. Should I throw it out? 26 00:02:17,166 --> 00:02:18,625 Yes, look. 27 00:02:18,917 --> 00:02:21,625 What am I looking at? Nikke Finke. Deadline Hollywood. 28 00:02:21,625 --> 00:02:26,917 Top story, "Who Let the Dog Out? Merc Lapidus." Oh. 29 00:02:27,291 --> 00:02:29,542 "It's no secret that a certain talking canine 30 00:02:29,542 --> 00:02:32,583 "has become the number one new comedy of the television season. 31 00:02:32,875 --> 00:02:35,458 "But what's less well known is that the ABC laffer 32 00:02:35,458 --> 00:02:38,208 "was originally developed by a rival network..." 33 00:02:38,208 --> 00:02:39,291 Oh. 34 00:02:39,834 --> 00:02:42,583 "And it was network prexy Merc Lapidus 35 00:02:42,583 --> 00:02:45,667 "who not only had the wisdom to pass on the barking mega-hit, 36 00:02:45,667 --> 00:02:47,709 "but then compounded the bone-headed move 37 00:02:47,709 --> 00:02:50,333 "by letting the project be sold to a rival network..." 38 00:02:50,917 --> 00:02:54,542 "Inside sources tell me that Lapidus can't be long for the job, 39 00:02:54,792 --> 00:02:58,166 "especially if you're counting in dog years." 40 00:02:58,166 --> 00:03:00,291 MYRA: Oh. (GROANS) 41 00:03:03,083 --> 00:03:04,458 Morning. Good morning. 42 00:03:15,166 --> 00:03:16,208 (SMACKING) 43 00:03:18,917 --> 00:03:20,333 So. 44 00:03:20,333 --> 00:03:21,625 So, so, so. 45 00:03:23,625 --> 00:03:28,291 Sorry to disturb you last night during your, uh, date. 46 00:03:28,792 --> 00:03:30,375 It's all right. No worries. 47 00:03:32,375 --> 00:03:36,667 Oh, good. Phew. How was it? The date. 48 00:03:38,250 --> 00:03:42,000 Fine. Ah, brilliant. Good. Good. 49 00:03:46,041 --> 00:03:46,917 Would you like to talk about it? 50 00:03:46,917 --> 00:03:50,041 No. No. No! 51 00:03:50,542 --> 00:03:52,000 All right. 52 00:03:59,542 --> 00:04:01,417 Although... I was wondering. Yes? 53 00:04:01,709 --> 00:04:05,875 Um, the date was with... 54 00:04:07,375 --> 00:04:09,542 Rob. Morning's brother. 55 00:04:09,542 --> 00:04:15,417 Ah-ha. Ah, keeping it in the family. Smart. Good. He seems nice. 56 00:04:16,375 --> 00:04:17,250 Mmm. 57 00:04:19,375 --> 00:04:23,542 Where did you go on the date? 58 00:04:24,583 --> 00:04:27,709 Oh, just to this, uh, neighborhood tapas place. 59 00:04:27,709 --> 00:04:28,542 Tapas! 60 00:04:30,208 --> 00:04:31,750 Tapas! 61 00:04:32,375 --> 00:04:35,458 Tapas, Spanish, little plates. 62 00:04:37,709 --> 00:04:40,208 Okay, speaking as someone who knows you fairly well, 63 00:04:40,709 --> 00:04:45,542 I'm thinking you're going to get weirder before you get less weird. 64 00:04:46,208 --> 00:04:48,667 Uh, you may want to step away. 65 00:04:48,667 --> 00:04:50,041 Good idea. Good idea. 66 00:04:51,583 --> 00:04:52,792 Good call. 67 00:04:52,792 --> 00:04:53,917 (CHUCKLES) 68 00:04:57,625 --> 00:04:58,625 Tapas! 69 00:05:00,709 --> 00:05:01,750 Tapas! 70 00:05:13,542 --> 00:05:16,417 (CHUCKLES) Anybody read anything good in the paper today? 71 00:05:18,834 --> 00:05:19,667 (ALL LAUGHING) 72 00:05:21,834 --> 00:05:25,750 Yeah, laugh. FYI, you all get buried in the pyramid with me. 73 00:05:25,750 --> 00:05:27,417 (ALL LAUGHING NERVOUSLY) 74 00:05:29,792 --> 00:05:33,917 Okay. So, uh, we need you to sign off on our sweeps promos. 75 00:05:34,250 --> 00:05:36,834 Also, we should review the status of the development slate. 76 00:05:36,834 --> 00:05:40,667 Yeah, yeah. Before that. I'd like to know, where's our vampire show? 77 00:05:40,917 --> 00:05:42,208 Our... Our what? 78 00:05:42,208 --> 00:05:43,750 Whoa, am I the only one 79 00:05:43,750 --> 00:05:45,959 who's noticed that everybody's got vampires but us? 80 00:05:46,333 --> 00:05:47,917 Not just vampires. 81 00:05:47,917 --> 00:05:49,500 AMC's got their fucking zombies. 82 00:05:50,125 --> 00:05:51,542 And we've got what? 83 00:05:51,542 --> 00:05:54,500 Well, we've been trying to stick to your mandate 84 00:05:54,500 --> 00:05:57,291 to only do dramas "ripped from the headlines." 85 00:05:57,625 --> 00:05:59,709 Not a lot of zombies in the headlines. 86 00:05:59,709 --> 00:06:01,208 (ALL LAUGHING) 87 00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:04,166 But let us get the word out. 88 00:06:04,500 --> 00:06:06,166 We'll call some agents, get some pitches in. 89 00:06:06,166 --> 00:06:07,166 I don't have time for that. 90 00:06:07,542 --> 00:06:09,125 I'm gonna have New York calling any minute now, 91 00:06:09,125 --> 00:06:10,667 and I need something that says, 92 00:06:10,667 --> 00:06:14,500 "Hey, forget that talking dog shit storm over there! Look over here! 93 00:06:14,500 --> 00:06:15,667 "Werewolves!" 94 00:06:15,667 --> 00:06:17,417 MTV's got werewolves. 95 00:06:17,417 --> 00:06:19,417 So not werewolves! Help me here! 96 00:06:19,417 --> 00:06:23,333 Well, first of all, we already have some terrific projects 97 00:06:23,333 --> 00:06:25,166 you can get them excited about. 98 00:06:25,166 --> 00:06:26,667 Have you read Beyond the Roses yet? 99 00:06:27,625 --> 00:06:28,625 What's Beyond the Roses? 100 00:06:28,875 --> 00:06:30,625 It's on your desk. It's that book. 101 00:06:31,291 --> 00:06:34,208 (SCOFFS) A book? We talked about it. 102 00:06:34,208 --> 00:06:37,417 It's that bestseller about the family in the '60s. 103 00:06:38,709 --> 00:06:40,959 It's a beautifully nuanced portrait... 104 00:06:40,959 --> 00:06:42,625 Oh, wow, a nuanced portrait. 105 00:06:43,625 --> 00:06:46,333 Look at HBO, they're up the ass with nuanced portraits. 106 00:06:46,709 --> 00:06:47,709 What are the people watching? 107 00:06:48,083 --> 00:06:51,375 Their fucking vampires! Where are my vampires? 108 00:06:51,375 --> 00:06:54,000 I want ideas, and I want them now. 109 00:06:54,333 --> 00:06:55,375 Go! Uh... 110 00:06:56,792 --> 00:06:57,625 Something with mummies. 111 00:06:57,875 --> 00:06:59,041 Mummies? Too slow. 112 00:06:59,041 --> 00:07:00,417 Leprechauns? 113 00:07:00,417 --> 00:07:02,041 Yeah, nothing scarier than a fucking rainbow. 114 00:07:02,583 --> 00:07:03,583 (STAMMERS) 115 00:07:06,083 --> 00:07:07,625 Come back to me. Oh, Jesus... 116 00:07:08,417 --> 00:07:09,542 Dragons? 117 00:07:10,583 --> 00:07:11,625 Goblins? 118 00:07:12,041 --> 00:07:13,291 Um, keep going... 119 00:07:13,291 --> 00:07:15,250 Shape shifters? Lizard men? Gypsies! 120 00:07:15,250 --> 00:07:17,208 There's probably a more constructive way to... 121 00:07:17,208 --> 00:07:19,625 Ogres. Trolls. Warlocks. Pixies! 122 00:07:19,917 --> 00:07:20,959 Mutants? Cyborgs? 123 00:07:20,959 --> 00:07:22,875 Succubi! 124 00:07:22,875 --> 00:07:23,709 Succubi! 125 00:07:24,458 --> 00:07:27,792 Huge rats. ANDY: Harpies! Mermen! 126 00:07:27,792 --> 00:07:30,417 Gypsies! Gypsies are real. 127 00:07:31,208 --> 00:07:32,875 I don't think so. 128 00:07:45,959 --> 00:07:49,417 I, uh, I wanted to apologize for my behavior earlier. 129 00:07:49,959 --> 00:07:51,125 Oh... No need. 130 00:07:51,125 --> 00:07:54,291 Mmm. It's a very strange time for both of us. 131 00:07:54,291 --> 00:07:55,542 Still. I'm the one who's been saying 132 00:07:55,542 --> 00:07:56,709 there's no going back for the two of us. 133 00:07:56,709 --> 00:07:59,291 So you dating is something I should have seen coming. 134 00:08:00,417 --> 00:08:02,333 I'm sorry I reacted so poorly. 135 00:08:03,125 --> 00:08:05,625 It's as much my fault as it is yours. No, no, no. 136 00:08:05,625 --> 00:08:08,500 No, I should have warned you before I went. 137 00:08:08,834 --> 00:08:09,959 Right. 138 00:08:10,500 --> 00:08:11,583 Yeah. 139 00:08:12,291 --> 00:08:14,583 Or just turned your phone off. 140 00:08:14,583 --> 00:08:17,458 Absolutely. Good advice for next time. 141 00:08:22,542 --> 00:08:24,500 What? Nothing. 142 00:08:30,333 --> 00:08:32,667 Funnily enough, um... 143 00:08:33,667 --> 00:08:35,583 Doesn't "funnily" sound like it shouldn't be a word? 144 00:08:35,583 --> 00:08:36,667 (LAUGHING) 145 00:08:37,625 --> 00:08:38,667 It's a word. No, I know, I know. 146 00:08:38,667 --> 00:08:41,834 But it sounds like I just made it up. "Funnily." 147 00:08:42,583 --> 00:08:44,500 Seems like it should involve a funnel. 148 00:08:45,750 --> 00:08:48,667 Anyway, funnily, I hadn't really thought about a "next time." 149 00:08:48,667 --> 00:08:51,458 Is there... Is there a next time in the offing? 150 00:08:52,375 --> 00:08:53,542 Well, funnily... 151 00:08:55,458 --> 00:08:56,959 We're seeing each other again tonight. 152 00:08:56,959 --> 00:08:58,166 Tonight? 153 00:08:58,166 --> 00:09:01,458 (LAUGHS) I hadn't seen that coming. 154 00:09:03,500 --> 00:09:04,750 Do you need to step away again? 155 00:09:04,750 --> 00:09:06,709 I think I do. 156 00:09:08,250 --> 00:09:09,333 (SOBBING) 157 00:09:10,583 --> 00:09:11,917 Oh, funnily... 158 00:09:13,709 --> 00:09:15,875 Hi, honey, it's Carol Rance. 159 00:09:15,875 --> 00:09:19,458 Crazy, left field question. Would JJ have any interest 160 00:09:19,458 --> 00:09:22,583 in developing a show about gargoyles? 161 00:09:22,583 --> 00:09:23,750 (KNOCKING ON THE DOOR) 162 00:09:24,208 --> 00:09:25,709 Elliot Salad on two. 163 00:09:26,375 --> 00:09:27,875 For me? Uh-huh. 164 00:09:29,208 --> 00:09:30,667 Sweetie, I'm so, so sorry, 165 00:09:30,667 --> 00:09:32,875 I have to call you back. It's New York. 166 00:09:35,959 --> 00:09:39,166 Elliot. Hi. (CHUCKLES) ELLIOT: Hello, pretty lady. 167 00:09:39,625 --> 00:09:41,083 So how are things in New York? 168 00:09:41,333 --> 00:09:42,917 I saw you had almost 70 degrees. 169 00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:45,458 And they say there's no global warming. 170 00:09:45,458 --> 00:09:46,917 There's no global warming. 171 00:09:46,917 --> 00:09:51,041 Thank you. It's ridiculous. People, hello, it's called weather. 172 00:09:51,834 --> 00:09:52,667 So what's up? 173 00:09:53,291 --> 00:09:54,959 I actually just landed in L.A. 174 00:09:55,250 --> 00:09:57,959 Oh. Wow. Welcome! 175 00:09:58,291 --> 00:10:01,625 I was wondering, you think we could meet for a drink tonight? 176 00:10:01,875 --> 00:10:03,083 Yup, absolutely. 177 00:10:03,083 --> 00:10:04,750 Let me just make sure Merc's free. 178 00:10:04,750 --> 00:10:06,375 But I can't imagine... No. 179 00:10:06,917 --> 00:10:08,792 No, no Merc. Just you. 180 00:10:10,291 --> 00:10:12,250 Uh, sure. All right. 181 00:10:13,083 --> 00:10:15,041 Is everything okay? Couldn't be better. 182 00:10:16,208 --> 00:10:19,083 Well, great. Great. 183 00:10:19,083 --> 00:10:21,917 Oh, and maybe don't mention to him that we're getting together. 184 00:10:24,208 --> 00:10:25,625 Great. 185 00:10:25,625 --> 00:10:27,291 Yeah, totally. 186 00:10:27,625 --> 00:10:29,166 See you, then. Bye. 187 00:10:30,125 --> 00:10:31,333 (SHUDDERS) 188 00:10:38,166 --> 00:10:40,083 LABIA: It's open! 189 00:10:46,500 --> 00:10:48,083 Oh, hi, Facebook friend. 190 00:10:49,792 --> 00:10:51,500 Hey, you. 191 00:10:51,500 --> 00:10:53,625 Or should I say ex-Facebook friend? 192 00:10:53,959 --> 00:10:55,750 I miss your status. 193 00:10:56,208 --> 00:10:58,625 Aw, that's sweet. 194 00:11:00,750 --> 00:11:03,750 Um, if you'll just excuse me for a moment. 195 00:11:05,125 --> 00:11:05,917 A moment. 196 00:11:13,583 --> 00:11:14,667 (PHONE BEEPING) 197 00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:16,542 I need Security... 198 00:11:16,542 --> 00:11:18,166 Wait! Don't go in there! Why not? 199 00:11:18,166 --> 00:11:21,542 She's in there! Uh... You know... (EXCLAIMING) 200 00:11:21,542 --> 00:11:22,834 Yeah, I know. You know? 201 00:11:22,834 --> 00:11:24,166 She came in with me today. 202 00:11:24,166 --> 00:11:25,667 Never mind. She came in with you? 203 00:11:25,667 --> 00:11:28,083 Yeah. It's cool. I'm guessing it's many things. 204 00:11:28,083 --> 00:11:30,208 Cool is probably the one thing it's not. 205 00:11:30,208 --> 00:11:31,333 What's going on? 206 00:11:31,333 --> 00:11:32,917 Apparently, it's Bring Your Stalker to Work Day. 207 00:11:33,208 --> 00:11:35,333 What? He's got Labia in there! 208 00:11:35,333 --> 00:11:36,625 What? 209 00:11:37,583 --> 00:11:38,875 Last night I got really hammered... 210 00:11:41,792 --> 00:11:44,417 And I was feeling kind of depressed, so, I don't know, 211 00:11:44,417 --> 00:11:45,834 I guess I called her. You guess. 212 00:11:45,834 --> 00:11:47,125 Why do you even have her number? 213 00:11:47,125 --> 00:11:48,208 From the last time I called her? 214 00:11:48,500 --> 00:11:50,959 Unbelievable. I know. Even as I was dialing, 215 00:11:50,959 --> 00:11:52,125 I'm like, "Don't do this! 216 00:11:52,125 --> 00:11:54,834 "You know it's only gonna bite you in the ass." 217 00:11:55,625 --> 00:11:56,709 What? She bit you in the ass? 218 00:11:56,709 --> 00:11:57,709 Little bit. 219 00:11:58,709 --> 00:12:02,458 Okay, fine, I get it. You're not supposed to screw your stalker. 220 00:12:02,709 --> 00:12:04,166 And you brought her to work. 221 00:12:04,166 --> 00:12:06,041 Well, I'm not gonna leave her alone in my house. 222 00:12:06,291 --> 00:12:08,125 Oh, of course not. And where are you going to put her next? 223 00:12:08,125 --> 00:12:10,041 I don't know. I'm open to suggestions. 224 00:12:10,041 --> 00:12:12,667 Well, if you put her in your car, remember to crack open a window. 225 00:12:12,667 --> 00:12:14,917 A lot of stalkers have died that way. 226 00:12:15,542 --> 00:12:16,667 Don't worry about it. 227 00:12:18,375 --> 00:12:19,500 Have you thought this through at all? 228 00:12:19,500 --> 00:12:22,083 What about Diane? Ah, shit. 229 00:12:23,083 --> 00:12:24,041 Diane... 230 00:12:24,041 --> 00:12:25,125 Oh, please, please. 231 00:12:25,458 --> 00:12:28,041 Please, may I be there when you're trying to explain this to her? 232 00:12:28,041 --> 00:12:30,750 "Darling, don't worry, she's not a maniac anymore. 233 00:12:31,041 --> 00:12:32,250 "I fucked it out of her." 234 00:12:32,250 --> 00:12:33,417 Yeah, yeah. I hear you. 235 00:12:34,291 --> 00:12:35,500 All right, I got to get rid of her. 236 00:12:35,500 --> 00:12:36,417 Well, that won't be hard now. 237 00:12:36,417 --> 00:12:37,792 Okay. It's fucked up. 238 00:12:37,792 --> 00:12:41,083 It's not fucked up. You fucked it up. 239 00:12:41,917 --> 00:12:44,667 Your shrink was right, you really do have an inability 240 00:12:44,667 --> 00:12:46,583 to appreciate the consequences of your actions. 241 00:12:46,583 --> 00:12:47,667 When did he tell you that? 242 00:12:47,917 --> 00:12:49,375 When he was destroying our lives. 243 00:12:49,375 --> 00:12:51,917 Ah, yes. Good times. 244 00:12:55,792 --> 00:12:57,083 Oh, my God. I know. 245 00:12:57,083 --> 00:13:00,792 He really is the most self-sabotaging person I've ever met. 246 00:13:00,792 --> 00:13:02,458 And we know some pretty fucked up people. 247 00:13:02,458 --> 00:13:04,625 It's like watching a car wreck, 248 00:13:04,625 --> 00:13:05,792 only he's driving both cars. 249 00:13:07,917 --> 00:13:10,875 Somebody named Rob called, about tonight. 250 00:13:12,500 --> 00:13:16,041 Uh, you can tell me later. 251 00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:20,250 How much later? I was kind of hoping to get out of here early. 252 00:13:21,959 --> 00:13:24,291 All right. All right, I can leave early? 253 00:13:24,291 --> 00:13:25,750 Or all right you want the message? 254 00:13:25,750 --> 00:13:27,166 Just give me the message and go. 255 00:13:27,166 --> 00:13:29,583 Okay. He said to tell you, 256 00:13:29,959 --> 00:13:33,000 "Same time as last night, same restaurant." 257 00:13:35,458 --> 00:13:36,542 Thank you. 258 00:13:37,041 --> 00:13:38,750 So, I can go? Fine. 259 00:13:46,709 --> 00:13:47,917 So... 260 00:13:50,458 --> 00:13:53,750 I think I may take off as well. 261 00:13:54,166 --> 00:13:58,166 How about you? I, uh, I've got some stuff to do. 262 00:13:58,166 --> 00:14:00,625 You know, emails, get organized for tomorrow. 263 00:14:00,625 --> 00:14:04,375 All right. Well, um... Have a nice evening. 264 00:14:04,375 --> 00:14:05,667 You too... 265 00:14:07,375 --> 00:14:09,125 I promise I will have my phone off tonight. 266 00:14:09,417 --> 00:14:10,709 And I will not be calling. 267 00:14:10,709 --> 00:14:13,375 (LAUGHS NERVOUSLY) Very good. 268 00:14:19,417 --> 00:14:20,834 See you tomorrow. Absolutely. 269 00:14:34,542 --> 00:14:36,375 I have to ask. Are you actually 270 00:14:36,375 --> 00:14:37,417 typing something or just pretending? 271 00:14:38,041 --> 00:14:39,333 Pretending. 272 00:14:39,333 --> 00:14:41,959 Right. Good night. Night. 273 00:14:41,959 --> 00:14:43,500 (STOPS TYPING) 274 00:14:52,417 --> 00:14:54,750 Look. We need to talk. 275 00:14:55,583 --> 00:14:59,000 No! I just got here! 276 00:14:59,500 --> 00:15:01,000 Labia, listen to me. 277 00:15:03,834 --> 00:15:06,125 I shouldn't have called you. It was wrong. 278 00:15:06,125 --> 00:15:07,208 No. Yes. 279 00:15:07,208 --> 00:15:08,166 No. Yes. 280 00:15:08,834 --> 00:15:11,834 This is over. We're done. That's it. 281 00:15:12,875 --> 00:15:15,000 You really have to go. Now. 282 00:15:17,583 --> 00:15:18,792 Okay. 283 00:15:20,250 --> 00:15:21,834 Yeah? 284 00:15:21,834 --> 00:15:23,125 If that's what you really want. 285 00:15:23,125 --> 00:15:25,375 I mean, really, really, really, really. 286 00:15:25,625 --> 00:15:26,959 It really is. Really. 287 00:15:28,000 --> 00:15:30,083 All right. Then I'll go. 288 00:15:31,166 --> 00:15:33,250 Thank you. But I'll always be waiting. 289 00:15:34,583 --> 00:15:37,750 Okay. Not like in front of the house, though, right? 290 00:15:38,583 --> 00:15:39,750 Sometimes in front of the house. 291 00:15:40,417 --> 00:15:43,667 Great. Look, please don't wait for me. 292 00:15:44,417 --> 00:15:46,709 You deserve someone who loves you. 293 00:15:46,709 --> 00:15:48,500 (SCOFFS) You do. 294 00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:50,000 They'll never be you. 295 00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:53,083 That's not necessarily a bad thing. 296 00:15:53,083 --> 00:15:56,041 I don't care. I'll wait as long as I have to. 297 00:15:56,041 --> 00:15:57,750 Even when you're old. 298 00:15:58,083 --> 00:16:00,709 Even when you're old and you've lost all your hair 299 00:16:01,125 --> 00:16:03,166 and you're not famous anymore, 300 00:16:04,291 --> 00:16:06,250 I'll still be waiting. 301 00:16:06,250 --> 00:16:10,792 Even if you're just an old, fat, former TV star 302 00:16:10,792 --> 00:16:12,750 with no money who nobody wants, 303 00:16:12,750 --> 00:16:13,917 I'll want you. 304 00:16:14,625 --> 00:16:16,250 If you get cancer and 305 00:16:16,250 --> 00:16:19,208 you lose control of your bowels and you smell bad 306 00:16:19,208 --> 00:16:20,959 and no woman even wants to look at you, 307 00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:23,917 I'll be there for you. 308 00:16:32,583 --> 00:16:33,959 (TELEPHONE RINGING) 309 00:16:36,667 --> 00:16:37,500 Hello. BEVERLY: Hi. 310 00:16:38,166 --> 00:16:40,625 Uh, I'm about to leave for my date. 311 00:16:41,083 --> 00:16:43,583 Okay, now you're keeping me a little too plugged in. 312 00:16:43,583 --> 00:16:44,959 I think we need to strike a balance. 313 00:16:46,834 --> 00:16:49,709 I just wanted to tell you that 314 00:16:51,709 --> 00:16:53,500 if you don't want me to go, 315 00:16:53,500 --> 00:16:54,792 I won't go. 316 00:16:56,083 --> 00:16:57,333 Oh. 317 00:16:57,333 --> 00:17:02,166 However, I would want to know why you don't want me to go. 318 00:17:02,750 --> 00:17:04,125 If it's just out of jealousy, 319 00:17:04,125 --> 00:17:09,625 and you don't want anything more for the two of us, 320 00:17:10,166 --> 00:17:13,500 then there's really nothing in that for me. 321 00:17:13,500 --> 00:17:14,792 On the other hand... 322 00:17:16,375 --> 00:17:19,166 If you think we still have a chance, 323 00:17:19,458 --> 00:17:23,166 and that's something you want to work towards, then say so, 324 00:17:23,166 --> 00:17:26,500 and I'll cancel this thing in a heartbeat. 325 00:17:34,542 --> 00:17:35,583 Go. 326 00:17:41,542 --> 00:17:42,834 All right. 327 00:17:43,959 --> 00:17:45,750 Cool. See you tomorrow. 328 00:17:46,542 --> 00:17:47,333 (HANGS UP) 329 00:17:49,625 --> 00:17:51,041 Right. 330 00:17:55,542 --> 00:17:56,709 (CELL PHONE RINGING) 331 00:17:58,542 --> 00:17:59,583 (PHONE BEEPS) 332 00:17:59,959 --> 00:18:01,250 I was hoping you'd call. 333 00:18:01,667 --> 00:18:02,875 CAROL: Really? 334 00:18:02,875 --> 00:18:05,500 Oh, sorry, thought you were Sean. 335 00:18:06,041 --> 00:18:09,291 Well, it's me. And I'm freaking out. 336 00:18:09,291 --> 00:18:10,375 Why is that? 337 00:18:10,375 --> 00:18:12,542 Okay, you cannot tell anyone. 338 00:18:12,542 --> 00:18:14,000 Anyone. Swear? 339 00:18:14,542 --> 00:18:16,750 I swear. Elliot Salad called. 340 00:18:17,208 --> 00:18:20,458 He wants to meet me for a drink. Without Merc. 341 00:18:21,125 --> 00:18:24,625 Okay... You have no idea who Elliot Salad is. 342 00:18:24,625 --> 00:18:25,834 None. 343 00:18:26,083 --> 00:18:28,250 How do you not know Elliot Salad? 344 00:18:28,750 --> 00:18:30,250 I feel like I've ordered one at some point, 345 00:18:30,250 --> 00:18:32,291 but if you're saying it's the name of a person... 346 00:18:32,583 --> 00:18:36,750 Elliot Salad is the head of the network. He's Merc's boss. 347 00:18:37,083 --> 00:18:40,000 He's my boss. He's your boss. 348 00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:43,583 (LAUGHING) I have a boss named Elliot Salad? 349 00:18:46,458 --> 00:18:48,500 Oh, shit. Here he comes. 350 00:18:48,500 --> 00:18:50,208 How's he dressed? What? 351 00:18:50,458 --> 00:18:53,166 Oh, come on. Salad? Dressed? 352 00:18:56,583 --> 00:18:57,417 (SIGHS) 353 00:18:59,166 --> 00:19:00,250 Ah. 354 00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:03,125 I'm just joining the lady. 355 00:19:04,291 --> 00:19:06,458 I'm sad. I know. 356 00:19:10,291 --> 00:19:12,125 You have everything? Yes. 357 00:19:12,125 --> 00:19:14,250 Got your sunglasses? No. 358 00:19:14,625 --> 00:19:16,583 Where are they? In the bedroom. 359 00:19:17,041 --> 00:19:19,125 You wanna help me look? No, no, no. 360 00:19:19,625 --> 00:19:21,125 You wait here, I'll go get them. 361 00:19:21,125 --> 00:19:23,291 Do not move. 362 00:19:23,667 --> 00:19:24,750 Okay. 363 00:19:31,125 --> 00:19:32,875 (CELL PHONE RINGING) 364 00:19:32,875 --> 00:19:34,709 MATT: Don't answer that. 365 00:19:44,625 --> 00:19:46,333 LABIA: LeBlanc residence. 366 00:19:47,291 --> 00:19:49,125 Is Matt there? Who may I say is calling? 367 00:19:49,458 --> 00:19:53,125 Tell him it's Diane. Oh, hi, Diane. It's Labia. 368 00:19:54,166 --> 00:19:56,375 MATT: No! 369 00:19:58,125 --> 00:19:59,166 Fuck! 370 00:20:02,500 --> 00:20:06,000 You don't have kids, do you? Not yet. Some day. 371 00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:08,000 Hey, don't rush into it. 372 00:20:08,000 --> 00:20:10,375 You don't know what you're going to end up with. 373 00:20:10,375 --> 00:20:12,250 My oldest son is bipolar. 374 00:20:12,250 --> 00:20:14,166 Last summer he burned down our East Hampton place. 375 00:20:15,625 --> 00:20:18,083 My other one's still got six months in mandatory rehab. 376 00:20:18,500 --> 00:20:21,834 My daughter and two other girls are married to this guy in Utah. 377 00:20:21,834 --> 00:20:24,000 Jesus, you can't catch a break. 378 00:20:24,375 --> 00:20:25,542 I love 'em all. 379 00:20:25,542 --> 00:20:27,583 Of course you do. They're yours. 380 00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:30,333 I still think I have a chance with my youngest one. 381 00:20:32,125 --> 00:20:33,750 Oh, she's a cutie. 382 00:20:34,333 --> 00:20:36,166 No, that's my wife. Oh. Uh... 383 00:20:36,542 --> 00:20:38,625 It's fine. Second marriage. Good for me. 384 00:20:38,625 --> 00:20:39,625 (CHUCKLES) 385 00:20:39,625 --> 00:20:42,417 Here she is. She's seven. Aw. 386 00:20:42,709 --> 00:20:44,291 And so smart. 387 00:20:45,166 --> 00:20:46,834 Guess what her favorite TV show is. 388 00:20:47,583 --> 00:20:49,333 Pucks!? No, seriously, guess. 389 00:20:50,917 --> 00:20:53,333 Does it star a beagle who won't shut up? 390 00:20:53,750 --> 00:20:55,750 Yup. She adores that dog. 391 00:20:56,375 --> 00:20:57,750 You developed that, right? 392 00:20:58,333 --> 00:21:01,333 Well, not just me. We really are a team. 393 00:21:01,333 --> 00:21:03,667 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you get to meet the dog? 394 00:21:03,667 --> 00:21:04,750 It's actually five dogs. 395 00:21:05,083 --> 00:21:07,166 Ah, I hate hearing that. 396 00:21:07,542 --> 00:21:08,375 (SNAPS FINGERS) 397 00:21:09,667 --> 00:21:11,834 Must've killed you when Merc didn't go with it. 398 00:21:11,834 --> 00:21:14,917 You know, everybody makes mistakes. 399 00:21:14,917 --> 00:21:17,375 Well, there's mistakes, and then there's mistakes. 400 00:21:17,750 --> 00:21:19,917 Shows like this come once in a decade. 401 00:21:19,917 --> 00:21:21,667 It's like lightning in a bottle. 402 00:21:22,375 --> 00:21:25,875 I watch my daughter watching it. And she just laughs. 403 00:21:26,208 --> 00:21:28,041 And she's got this great little laugh. 404 00:21:28,583 --> 00:21:29,917 Like a dolphin laugh, you know. 405 00:21:29,917 --> 00:21:31,500 (MIMICKING A DOLPHIN) 406 00:21:32,125 --> 00:21:37,625 And I listen to her, and she's just so into it and so happy, 407 00:21:37,625 --> 00:21:40,083 it makes me want to grab a bat and fucking kill someone. 408 00:21:40,625 --> 00:21:44,291 Just smash them and hurt them and kill them. 409 00:21:46,041 --> 00:21:48,792 Maybe you shouldn't be around when she watches it. 410 00:21:49,083 --> 00:21:51,583 And the next morning when I look at the numbers? 411 00:21:52,375 --> 00:21:55,250 Jesus! I hate Tuesday mornings now. 412 00:21:56,458 --> 00:21:59,792 There's that dog with his beautiful double digits, 413 00:22:00,583 --> 00:22:02,583 and then I look over at Pucks! 414 00:22:03,709 --> 00:22:05,083 What are we paying LeBlanc? 415 00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:08,417 I would pay that much to watch the dog eat him. 416 00:22:08,792 --> 00:22:10,291 (SIGHS) 417 00:22:10,875 --> 00:22:16,792 Look, a day doesn't go by that Merc doesn't beat himself up about it. 418 00:22:16,792 --> 00:22:20,458 But what can we do? We've got to look forward. 419 00:22:20,458 --> 00:22:22,291 Well, he can stop looking forward. 420 00:22:23,625 --> 00:22:26,500 What? Decision's made. Merc's out. 421 00:22:27,792 --> 00:22:29,000 (EXHALES HEAVILY) 422 00:22:32,625 --> 00:22:35,583 For some reason this all feels vaguely familiar. 423 00:22:35,583 --> 00:22:38,000 Mmm. It's almost as if we've been here before. 424 00:22:38,750 --> 00:22:40,417 Only I'm not babbling like an idiot. 425 00:22:40,417 --> 00:22:42,458 The night is young. Believe me. 426 00:22:44,208 --> 00:22:45,542 No! Oh, God. 427 00:22:47,834 --> 00:22:50,208 So, how was your day? 428 00:22:50,208 --> 00:22:51,291 Uh-huh, no. 429 00:22:52,333 --> 00:22:53,208 No? No. 430 00:22:53,458 --> 00:22:56,750 I promised myself, tonight is about you. 431 00:22:56,750 --> 00:22:57,750 Oh, wow. 432 00:22:58,208 --> 00:22:59,500 You don't want to talk about house painting. 433 00:23:01,417 --> 00:23:03,041 Then we will sit in silence. 434 00:23:04,500 --> 00:23:06,709 All right, tell you what. 435 00:23:06,959 --> 00:23:08,625 If you're really interested, 436 00:23:09,709 --> 00:23:12,875 after dinner, I'll show you what I'm working on. 437 00:23:13,667 --> 00:23:15,333 A house mid-paint. 438 00:23:16,125 --> 00:23:17,834 I'm intrigued. Are you? 439 00:23:18,291 --> 00:23:19,875 Strangely, I am. 440 00:23:25,917 --> 00:23:30,208 I know it's not up to me, but I really think you should give him more time. 441 00:23:30,542 --> 00:23:32,875 Merc is a strong executive. 442 00:23:32,875 --> 00:23:34,667 He can turn this thing around. 443 00:23:34,667 --> 00:23:37,291 I appreciate your loyalty... It's not loyalty. 444 00:23:37,625 --> 00:23:39,333 I truly believe he can do it. 445 00:23:39,625 --> 00:23:42,792 Carol. We've got a lot of great shows in development. 446 00:23:42,792 --> 00:23:44,625 Honey. Stop. 447 00:23:45,750 --> 00:23:46,792 It's a done deal. 448 00:23:47,458 --> 00:23:49,125 The board voted. He's out. 449 00:23:50,417 --> 00:23:51,583 Jesus. 450 00:23:54,667 --> 00:23:56,750 What about all the years we were number one? 451 00:23:57,041 --> 00:23:58,625 Don't they count for anything? 452 00:23:58,875 --> 00:23:59,917 They counted. 453 00:24:00,166 --> 00:24:01,000 When we were number one. 454 00:24:01,667 --> 00:24:03,750 I know. It's a ruthless business. 455 00:24:05,333 --> 00:24:08,208 Look, it happens to all of us eventually. 456 00:24:09,625 --> 00:24:12,458 It's like the circle of life. Like Lion King. 457 00:24:13,583 --> 00:24:15,834 You saw Lion King? Mmm-hmm. 458 00:24:16,166 --> 00:24:18,291 Genius. Those puppets... 459 00:24:20,667 --> 00:24:22,250 (EXHALES HEAVILY) 460 00:24:22,250 --> 00:24:23,458 When are you going to tell him? 461 00:24:23,709 --> 00:24:27,166 I thought I'd wait till after his Man of the Year thing. 462 00:24:27,166 --> 00:24:28,291 At least let him have that. 463 00:24:29,041 --> 00:24:30,458 That's nice. Also that way, 464 00:24:30,458 --> 00:24:32,291 we can empty out his office while he's there. 465 00:24:35,250 --> 00:24:39,000 So. We should talk about the transition. 466 00:24:40,750 --> 00:24:43,125 Can I ask? Do you know who you're going to go with? 467 00:24:43,625 --> 00:24:44,959 We've got a very short list. 468 00:24:44,959 --> 00:24:46,000 Right. 469 00:24:46,625 --> 00:24:48,625 And your name's at the top of it. 470 00:24:55,834 --> 00:24:57,625 (DOOR OPENING) 471 00:25:00,959 --> 00:25:02,667 Okay. 472 00:25:03,834 --> 00:25:05,375 You see all that marble? 473 00:25:06,458 --> 00:25:09,125 That's me. What do you mean it's you? 474 00:25:10,792 --> 00:25:12,875 It's not marble. It's all faux. 475 00:25:14,041 --> 00:25:15,291 Faux? Mmm-hmm. 476 00:25:16,250 --> 00:25:19,208 Oh, my God! You painted all this? 477 00:25:19,208 --> 00:25:20,875 Well, me and my crew. 478 00:25:21,542 --> 00:25:24,375 You big, fat liar! 479 00:25:25,583 --> 00:25:27,458 "I paint houses." 480 00:25:28,083 --> 00:25:29,667 You're a bloody genius! 481 00:25:30,583 --> 00:25:31,792 Well, that's not true. 482 00:25:32,542 --> 00:25:35,000 (SCOFFS) The hell it's not. This is amazing! 483 00:25:36,375 --> 00:25:38,834 And this is actually someone's house? 484 00:25:39,333 --> 00:25:41,667 Can you believe it? No! 485 00:25:41,959 --> 00:25:43,250 Who's going to live here? 486 00:25:43,250 --> 00:25:46,375 Oh, I don't know. They don't even tell me their names. 487 00:25:47,250 --> 00:25:50,166 My crew and I just call them The Bullshits. 488 00:25:50,166 --> 00:25:51,583 Todd and Holly Bullshit. 489 00:25:52,792 --> 00:25:56,291 So their children are "The Little Shits"? 490 00:25:56,291 --> 00:25:58,000 Yes! That's them! 491 00:26:01,041 --> 00:26:04,166 All faux? Mmm. All faux. 492 00:26:07,750 --> 00:26:10,542 You really are amazingly talented. 493 00:26:10,542 --> 00:26:11,583 You do know that. 494 00:26:11,583 --> 00:26:14,458 I'm okay. It's not art, art. 495 00:26:14,458 --> 00:26:17,667 Uh, I've seen a lot of art, art. 496 00:26:18,542 --> 00:26:19,875 I'd be willing to bet 497 00:26:19,875 --> 00:26:22,291 that the paintings The Bullshits hang on these walls 498 00:26:23,375 --> 00:26:25,875 will not be nearly as good as what you're doing underneath them. 499 00:26:26,917 --> 00:26:27,750 You're very sweet. 500 00:26:28,208 --> 00:26:29,875 Actually I'm not. 501 00:26:29,875 --> 00:26:32,208 You should speak to some people who know me. 502 00:26:33,250 --> 00:26:34,709 No, I'm sticking with sweet. 503 00:26:52,750 --> 00:26:54,709 Okay. 504 00:26:56,709 --> 00:26:59,291 You all right? Yup, I am. 505 00:27:01,667 --> 00:27:04,542 That was lovely. A little troubling. 506 00:27:05,417 --> 00:27:08,375 Troubling... Because it was lovely. 507 00:27:08,375 --> 00:27:09,792 Oh! 508 00:27:10,792 --> 00:27:14,125 What can I say? I'm a mess. You're allowed to be. 509 00:27:16,458 --> 00:27:18,333 See, you're the sweet one. 510 00:27:22,166 --> 00:27:24,250 When I came to this country 511 00:27:24,250 --> 00:27:28,750 a few months ago, I was happily married... 512 00:27:29,667 --> 00:27:32,959 I hadn't kissed another man in 10 years. 513 00:27:32,959 --> 00:27:37,625 And I never had a doubt as to what I was feeling. 514 00:27:41,125 --> 00:27:41,959 And now? 515 00:27:44,041 --> 00:27:45,583 Haven't a clue. 516 00:27:46,291 --> 00:27:49,792 But whatever it is, 517 00:27:50,667 --> 00:27:54,792 funnily, it's definitely not 518 00:27:56,208 --> 00:27:57,291 faux. 519 00:27:57,792 --> 00:27:58,834 Hmm. 520 00:28:03,417 --> 00:28:06,291 Oh, and now we're doing it again.