1
00:00:06,640 --> 00:00:11,140
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --

2
00:00:20,609 --> 00:00:23,733
Hey, what would happen if we put
ketchup in the mustard bottles?

3
00:00:23,758 --> 00:00:25,591
Oh, man. I don't even
want to think about it.

4
00:00:25,660 --> 00:00:28,861
Ah! Dad! They're showing a
commercial for the marathon!

5
00:00:28,931 --> 00:00:31,576
ANNOUNCER: Starting at
11:00 a.m., it's an all-out,

6
00:00:31,601 --> 00:00:33,082
body-slammin',
thank you ma'am-in'

7
00:00:33,151 --> 00:00:35,785
ten straight hours of
Supreme Extreme Champions!

8
00:00:35,853 --> 00:00:37,998
- Ten hours is almost not enough.
- All of your favorite obstacles

9
00:00:38,022 --> 00:00:39,621
and the ultimate challenge,

10
00:00:39,691 --> 00:00:41,791
- the Stampede!
- LOUISE AND BOB: The Stampede!

11
00:00:41,859 --> 00:00:43,926
♪ ♪

12
00:00:43,995 --> 00:00:47,011
BOB AND LOUISE: Do the steamroller!
Do the steamroller! Yes!

13
00:00:47,036 --> 00:00:48,847
I mean, if you're gonna
get through the Stampede,

14
00:00:48,872 --> 00:00:50,805
- you got to steamroll.
- Obviously.

15
00:00:50,830 --> 00:00:53,845
That spandex doesn't leave
much to the imagination, huh?

16
00:00:53,877 --> 00:00:55,933
- (phone rings) - No, there's
still a little bit to imagine.

17
00:00:55,958 --> 00:00:57,792
Bob's Burgers. This isn't Bob.

18
00:00:57,817 --> 00:01:00,417
Hi, this is Walter Rubens
from the Gold Dragons.

19
00:01:00,449 --> 00:01:02,649
The Gold Dragons? What is that, a gang?

20
00:01:02,719 --> 00:01:04,984
No, it's-it's your daughter
Louise's soccer team.

21
00:01:05,053 --> 00:01:06,386
Louise has a soccer team?

22
00:01:06,455 --> 00:01:08,655
Oh, God, we signed Louise up for soccer.

23
00:01:08,724 --> 00:01:09,823
You what?!

24
00:01:09,891 --> 00:01:11,725
Hey, look, an e-mail from Harley's dad.

25
00:01:11,793 --> 00:01:14,695
He's asking if Louise would want
to join Harley's soccer team.

26
00:01:14,763 --> 00:01:15,795
Think she would?

27
00:01:15,864 --> 00:01:18,122
I've met Louise, so probably not.

28
00:01:18,147 --> 00:01:20,634
Louise, do you want
to sign up for soccer?!

29
00:01:20,703 --> 00:01:24,204
LOUISE (sarcastically): Yes!
Please sign me up for soccer!

30
00:01:24,272 --> 00:01:26,039
- Oh!
- She's being sarcastic.

31
00:01:26,108 --> 00:01:28,141
Are you being sarcastic?!

32
00:01:28,210 --> 00:01:30,143
- (sarcastically): No!
- Aw, yeah, you're right.

33
00:01:30,212 --> 00:01:32,478
Well, wait, now I'm not so sure. Louise,

34
00:01:32,547 --> 00:01:34,480
do you want to sign up for soccer?!

35
00:01:34,549 --> 00:01:36,049
(sarcastically): Uh-huh!

36
00:01:36,118 --> 00:01:37,128
I guess she wants to do it.

37
00:01:37,152 --> 00:01:38,417
Should we double-triple-check?

38
00:01:38,486 --> 00:01:40,919
No, I-I don't want to yell anymore.

39
00:01:40,988 --> 00:01:43,313
I was being sarcastic.

40
00:01:43,338 --> 00:01:45,318
I'm sorry! It was... I...

41
00:01:45,343 --> 00:01:46,843
We got a-an
e-mail, and I...

42
00:01:46,868 --> 00:01:49,902
Oh! Oh, I didn't realize
you got an e-mail!

43
00:01:49,971 --> 00:01:51,838
I completely forgot it happened at all!

44
00:01:51,906 --> 00:01:53,505
It was during wine time!

45
00:01:53,574 --> 00:01:55,024
Guys, guys, shush, shush, shush.

46
00:01:55,049 --> 00:01:56,868
We really need Louise
to play this morning.

47
00:01:56,893 --> 00:01:59,025
Suzy's on vacation and Michaela's sick

48
00:01:59,050 --> 00:02:01,336
- and Jamie's gerbil died.
- Aw!

49
00:02:01,361 --> 00:02:03,494
It was his time. Anyway,
if Louise doesn't come,

50
00:02:03,519 --> 00:02:05,854
we won't have enough players
and we'll have to forfeit.

51
00:02:05,879 --> 00:02:08,178
- Oh!
- And since it's the last game of the season

52
00:02:08,203 --> 00:02:10,000
and Louise hasn't come to a single one,

53
00:02:10,025 --> 00:02:12,188
this is literally the least you can do.

54
00:02:12,213 --> 00:02:14,514
Last game? She missed the whole season?

55
00:02:14,539 --> 00:02:17,340
- Yes.
- Okay. You know what, Walter, she'll be there.

56
00:02:17,365 --> 00:02:18,864
(gasps)

57
00:02:18,932 --> 00:02:19,977
Louise, come on. Let's get changed.

58
00:02:20,002 --> 00:02:21,532
- Uh-uh, uh-uh.
- Oh, God.

59
00:02:21,557 --> 00:02:23,825
Okay, she went limp. Come
on, we got a rag doll.

60
00:02:23,850 --> 00:02:26,117
- Let's go. Come on, come on.
- No...

61
00:02:26,142 --> 00:02:27,307
Come on!

62
00:02:27,332 --> 00:02:28,698
O!

63
00:02:28,723 --> 00:02:29,922
That was not easy.

64
00:02:29,947 --> 00:02:31,620
I know this seems horrible, Louise,

65
00:02:31,645 --> 00:02:33,244
but you did sign up. Sort of.

66
00:02:33,313 --> 00:02:34,592
No, you signed me up,

67
00:02:34,617 --> 00:02:36,617
and now you're bowing to
grown-up peer pressure!

68
00:02:36,642 --> 00:02:39,139
What's next, taking
fish oil? Paying taxes?

69
00:02:39,164 --> 00:02:42,647
Plus, you might not hate
every single second of it?

70
00:02:42,672 --> 00:02:45,566
Yeah, but what about the Supreme
Extreme Champions marathon?

71
00:02:45,591 --> 00:02:47,186
Without that, what's
the point of anything?

72
00:02:47,211 --> 00:02:49,264
We could DVR it. If we had one.

73
00:02:49,289 --> 00:02:51,456
Should we just push a bunch
of buttons on the remote?

74
00:02:51,481 --> 00:02:53,380
That's how I saw 9 1/2 Weeks.

75
00:02:53,405 --> 00:02:55,116
You'll still get to
see some of the marathon

76
00:02:55,141 --> 00:02:56,719
when you're back,
Louise. A-And, besides,

77
00:02:56,744 --> 00:02:58,842
lots of parents make
their kids play sports.

78
00:02:58,867 --> 00:03:00,737
And for a reason.

79
00:03:00,806 --> 00:03:04,389
- I think. Right, Lin?
- P-Probably! Who can say?

80
00:03:04,414 --> 00:03:05,834
Very convincing.

81
00:03:05,859 --> 00:03:07,428
Come on, Louise, you're going.

82
00:03:07,453 --> 00:03:09,219
All right, I'll go.

83
00:03:09,244 --> 00:03:12,145
Who's driving me to this sucker game?

84
00:03:12,171 --> 00:03:13,512
- Your mother will take you.
- Your dad is gonna take you.

85
00:03:13,537 --> 00:03:14,786
I don't want to go.

86
00:03:14,811 --> 00:03:17,206
- I don't want to go either, Bob.
- Thumb war?

87
00:03:17,275 --> 00:03:19,642
BOTH: One, two, three, four,
I declare a thumb war.

88
00:03:19,711 --> 00:03:21,344
- Damn it.
- Yes!

89
00:03:21,413 --> 00:03:23,380
So glad I married a
man with dainty thumbs.

90
00:03:23,448 --> 00:03:25,314
They're beautiful, but they're useless.

91
00:03:25,384 --> 00:03:28,785
Well, Louise, I guess let's
go to your soccer game.

92
00:03:28,854 --> 00:03:30,553
How about I come along?
"Great idea, Tina.

93
00:03:30,622 --> 00:03:32,188
Looks like Tina's coming. Yay!"

94
00:03:32,257 --> 00:03:34,190
And I'll stay here,
'cause it sounds like

95
00:03:34,259 --> 00:03:36,192
where you're going is outside.

96
00:03:36,217 --> 00:03:38,016
BOB: Wow, crowded.

97
00:03:38,129 --> 00:03:39,962
Yeah, like "maybe we
won't be able to find"

98
00:03:40,031 --> 00:03:41,397
"a parking spot" crowded?

99
00:03:41,465 --> 00:03:43,199
Oh, right. If we can't find a spot,

100
00:03:43,268 --> 00:03:45,001
we'd have to go home.
That's not our fault.

101
00:03:45,069 --> 00:03:46,802
- No. Not at all.
- Oh, there's one.

102
00:03:46,871 --> 00:03:48,871
- Ah, wonderful.
- Thanks, Tina.

103
00:03:48,940 --> 00:03:50,406
TEDDY: So, where's Bob today, Lin?

104
00:03:50,474 --> 00:03:52,207
Doctor's appointment? Grocery store?

105
00:03:52,276 --> 00:03:54,175
(gasps) Did you kick him to the curb?

106
00:03:54,244 --> 00:03:55,377
Anything you need, Linda.

107
00:03:55,446 --> 00:03:57,078
I'm here, I'm not leaving.

108
00:03:57,147 --> 00:03:58,692
You say the word, I
move my stuff in here.

109
00:03:58,716 --> 00:04:00,148
Teddy, no. Teddy, Teddy, Teddy!

110
00:04:00,217 --> 00:04:01,850
Bob took Louise to her soccer game,

111
00:04:01,919 --> 00:04:03,573
and Tina went, too, that's all.

112
00:04:03,598 --> 00:04:05,431
Oh, good. What a great dad.

113
00:04:05,456 --> 00:04:08,261
While they're gone, I'm
flying solo with my Gene-o.

114
00:04:08,286 --> 00:04:10,191
Taking a jamma with my mamma.

115
00:04:10,260 --> 00:04:11,859
(gasps) "Jamma with my mamma"?

116
00:04:11,929 --> 00:04:13,161
Oh, my God.

117
00:04:13,230 --> 00:04:15,030
Gene, is today the day we do the...

118
00:04:15,098 --> 00:04:16,932
- What?
- The piano bar.

119
00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:18,533
(gasps) The piano bar!

120
00:04:18,601 --> 00:04:21,190
We said we would do it if your dad
ever left us alone again.

121
00:04:21,215 --> 00:04:23,704
- What are you guys talking about?
- Gene and Linda's Piano Bar.

122
00:04:23,729 --> 00:04:25,328
Show Tunes and Mouth Foods.

123
00:04:25,353 --> 00:04:26,819
It's been our dream forever.

124
00:04:26,976 --> 00:04:28,409
BOTH: ♪ Give my regards ♪

125
00:04:28,478 --> 00:04:30,277
♪ To old Broadway ♪

126
00:04:30,346 --> 00:04:33,948
♪ And say that I'll
be there e'er long. ♪

127
00:04:34,016 --> 00:04:35,349
I'll go get my keyboard.

128
00:04:35,374 --> 00:04:37,514
Oh, and get all my dresses and wigs.

129
00:04:37,539 --> 00:04:38,971
But what'll you wear?

130
00:04:40,760 --> 00:04:43,057
Um, hi. Is this the Gold Dragons?

131
00:04:43,125 --> 00:04:45,059
My daughter is, uh, one of them.

132
00:04:45,127 --> 00:04:47,227
Yes. You must be Bob. I'm Walter.

133
00:04:47,296 --> 00:04:49,696
Here's your jersey. It's
been in my car for nine weeks.

134
00:04:49,765 --> 00:04:51,565
It's listened to a lot of NPR.

135
00:04:51,633 --> 00:04:52,766
LOUISE: N-P-U.

136
00:04:52,835 --> 00:04:54,268
Do you have cleats and shin guards?

137
00:04:54,337 --> 00:04:56,035
Uh, we don't have any of those things.

138
00:04:56,104 --> 00:04:57,971
Of course not. (Sighs)

139
00:04:58,039 --> 00:05:01,040
I guess, uh, books are
sort of shin-guardy.

140
00:05:01,109 --> 00:05:02,699
If you want, you can
borrow my Grishams.

141
00:05:02,724 --> 00:05:04,478
Oh, good. I don't feel like an orphan

142
00:05:04,546 --> 00:05:06,279
who stumbled onto the field at all.

143
00:05:06,348 --> 00:05:08,882
- Why is that guy looking at me so much?
- Brag.

144
00:05:08,951 --> 00:05:10,995
- So, you coaching today?
- Oh, I forgot to tell you,

145
00:05:11,026 --> 00:05:12,925
- you're coaching today.
- Me? Oh-oh, no.

146
00:05:13,002 --> 00:05:14,468
No, definitely not.

147
00:05:14,522 --> 00:05:16,789
Suzy's dad is normally the coach,
but Suzy's on vacation,

148
00:05:16,858 --> 00:05:18,124
so he's on vacation, too.

149
00:05:18,193 --> 00:05:19,529
Classic Suzy's dad.

150
00:05:19,554 --> 00:05:21,372
And you kind of owe it
to us for being M.I.A.

151
00:05:21,396 --> 00:05:23,662
- the whole season.
- W-W-Wait, sorry.

152
00:05:23,731 --> 00:05:25,731
I can't coach. Can anyone else do it?

153
00:05:25,756 --> 00:05:28,873
Maybe someone who's been here
or knows anything about soccer?

154
00:05:28,898 --> 00:05:30,936
- Like you?
- No. I set up the goals.

155
00:05:31,005 --> 00:05:33,138
Plus... Ow. Ow, ow! My hand.

156
00:05:33,207 --> 00:05:34,339
Uh, Bob, hold the clipboard.

157
00:05:34,408 --> 00:05:35,674
- Bob's coaching.
- What?!

158
00:05:35,743 --> 00:05:36,987
Oh, I see you got the clipboard.

159
00:05:37,011 --> 00:05:38,121
- Congrats, Coach.
- Oh, come on.

160
00:05:38,145 --> 00:05:39,512
I don't know how to coach.

161
00:05:39,580 --> 00:05:40,858
Dad... (echoing Bob)
you might not hate

162
00:05:40,882 --> 00:05:42,347
every single second of it.

163
00:05:42,416 --> 00:05:44,436
Evil child. All right.

164
00:05:44,461 --> 00:05:46,990
- How bad can it be?
- Coach, will you fix my ponytail?

165
00:05:47,015 --> 00:05:47,703
Uh, I don't know how to...

166
00:05:47,728 --> 00:05:48,999
Coach, something went
wrong with my cleats.

167
00:05:49,023 --> 00:05:50,467
- Can you fix them?
- Coach, I can't be goalie.

168
00:05:50,491 --> 00:05:51,734
I can't touch the ball with my hands.

169
00:05:51,758 --> 00:05:53,325
- Oh, my God.
- Coach, should I live

170
00:05:53,394 --> 00:05:55,527
- with my mom or my dad?
- Help!

171
00:05:55,595 --> 00:05:57,634
Yeah, a little help
over here... look at him.

172
00:05:57,659 --> 00:05:59,328
You're doing great, Dad.

173
00:06:01,148 --> 00:06:02,445
Why is this happening?

174
00:06:02,470 --> 00:06:04,570
There isn't even anything
written on this clipboard.

175
00:06:04,595 --> 00:06:06,507
Hey, Coach, um, aren't you gonna get us

176
00:06:06,532 --> 00:06:07,937
to stretch and do drills and stuff?

177
00:06:08,039 --> 00:06:10,406
Right, uh, why don't you guys, um,

178
00:06:10,431 --> 00:06:11,897
kick the ball back and forth.

179
00:06:11,922 --> 00:06:13,822
Wow, you sure you
haven't done this before?

180
00:06:13,847 --> 00:06:15,891
Dad, I'd like to apply for the
position of assistant coach.

181
00:06:15,916 --> 00:06:17,656
You probably have a
lot of offers, but...

182
00:06:17,681 --> 00:06:19,158
Great, you're hired. Here's a clipboard

183
00:06:19,183 --> 00:06:20,617
- with nothing on it.
- Yes.

184
00:06:20,698 --> 00:06:22,796
- Doesn't matter. Leave it.
- Roger that.

185
00:06:24,039 --> 00:06:25,490
BOB: Oof.

186
00:06:25,515 --> 00:06:27,282
They look good.

187
00:06:27,307 --> 00:06:29,107
This is gonna be bad.

188
00:06:29,132 --> 00:06:31,032
Whoa. I kinda want their autographs.

189
00:06:31,057 --> 00:06:33,515
Hey, there, I'm Christy,
coach of the Blue Dragons.

190
00:06:33,540 --> 00:06:34,836
- Ow, my hand hurts.
- I know.

191
00:06:34,883 --> 00:06:37,684
Uh, wait, the-the Blue
Dragons? We're the Gold Dragons.

192
00:06:37,752 --> 00:06:39,985
Are all the teams just
different colored dragons?

193
00:06:40,054 --> 00:06:41,987
Yep. Or thunders.
Different colored thunders.

194
00:06:42,056 --> 00:06:44,924
There's a Brown Thunder,
which is... unfortunate.

195
00:06:44,992 --> 00:06:47,126
- Yeah.
- Look, I just wanted to wish you good luck.

196
00:06:47,195 --> 00:06:48,806
This is all gonna be
over soon enough. (Laughs)

197
00:06:48,830 --> 00:06:50,463
W-Wait, what? What does that mean?

198
00:06:50,532 --> 00:06:52,632
You know, I am glad you're here, Louise.

199
00:06:52,701 --> 00:06:54,077
I wondered why you never
came to practices or games,

200
00:06:54,101 --> 00:06:55,545
and I always wanted
to ask you at school,

201
00:06:55,569 --> 00:06:56,980
but honestly I'm scared
of you, and I did not.

202
00:06:57,004 --> 00:06:58,381
But isn't this just the best, though?

203
00:06:58,405 --> 00:07:01,040
(groans) Yup. Love soccer.

204
00:07:01,108 --> 00:07:05,399
ALL: ♪ Till we meet again. ♪

205
00:07:05,424 --> 00:07:07,947
- (door opens, bells jingle)
- Ms. Merkin, hello.

206
00:07:08,015 --> 00:07:09,514
What are you doing out in the wild?

207
00:07:09,583 --> 00:07:11,883
Hello, Gene. I was
just going for a walk.

208
00:07:11,952 --> 00:07:13,793
Needed to blow off some steam.

209
00:07:13,818 --> 00:07:15,954
I saw your sign. I'll go into any joint

210
00:07:16,022 --> 00:07:17,222
that says "piano" on it.

211
00:07:17,290 --> 00:07:19,891
Gene, you want to introduce us
to your lady friend?

212
00:07:19,960 --> 00:07:21,904
This is Ms. Merkin, the
music teacher from school.

213
00:07:21,928 --> 00:07:23,161
We call her Twerkin' Merkin.

214
00:07:23,230 --> 00:07:26,297
Oh, I didn't recognize you
without a piano covering your legs.

215
00:07:26,367 --> 00:07:28,403
- MERKIN: Where's your piano?
- Right here.

216
00:07:28,435 --> 00:07:30,508
Ugh, that little jingleberry?

217
00:07:30,570 --> 00:07:32,904
You making fart sounds, or
are you really playing it?

218
00:07:32,973 --> 00:07:34,050
- (plays chord and fart)
- Both.

219
00:07:34,074 --> 00:07:36,007
Not bad. Shove over.

220
00:07:36,076 --> 00:07:38,076
(plays jazz riff)

221
00:07:38,144 --> 00:07:39,410
(plays fart)
- Wow. - Yeah!

222
00:07:39,479 --> 00:07:40,957
Whoa, look at you.
Is there a Mr. Merkin?

223
00:07:40,981 --> 00:07:42,080
(whistle blowing)

224
00:07:42,148 --> 00:07:43,647
BOB: Oh, the game's starting.

225
00:07:43,716 --> 00:07:46,717
Louise, go that way.
Other girl, go that way.

226
00:07:46,786 --> 00:07:49,487
Guys, you're all standing in a clump
right next to each other.

227
00:07:49,555 --> 00:07:52,322
It's so different from what
the other team is doing.

228
00:07:52,392 --> 00:07:56,326
- (whistle blows)
- MAN: Come on, play the ball!

229
00:07:56,396 --> 00:07:59,096
- Oh, my God, they scored right away.
- Little slow, Kayla.

230
00:07:59,164 --> 00:08:00,830
Little slow? That was so fast.

231
00:08:00,900 --> 00:08:02,232
Did we start?

232
00:08:02,301 --> 00:08:04,400
That's all right, girls.
Keep hustling!

233
00:08:04,425 --> 00:08:05,893
And have fun out there.

234
00:08:05,938 --> 00:08:07,938
Coach, uh, one thought.
Maybe we should have

235
00:08:08,007 --> 00:08:09,687
someone in goal. I
don't know, just sayin'.

236
00:08:09,741 --> 00:08:11,275
Uh, yeah, yeah. Good idea, Tina.

237
00:08:11,343 --> 00:08:14,778
Hey, someone get in goal. No, just one!

238
00:08:14,889 --> 00:08:18,057
ALL: ♪ By the beautiful sea ♪

239
00:08:18,082 --> 00:08:19,449
What should I play next?

240
00:08:19,518 --> 00:08:20,717
Ooh, how 'bout that show

241
00:08:20,786 --> 00:08:22,458
that's coming to the
community theater...

242
00:08:22,483 --> 00:08:23,730
TSA: The Musical?

243
00:08:23,755 --> 00:08:26,188
- Oh, I love the soundtrack.
- Me, too.

244
00:08:26,257 --> 00:08:29,726
TSA's the best musical about a
government agency ever written!

245
00:08:29,795 --> 00:08:32,629
- I-I don't know that one.
- Really? "Female Pat Down"?

246
00:08:32,697 --> 00:08:35,465
"Whose Bag Is This"?
"If You See Something, Sing Something"?

247
00:08:35,490 --> 00:08:37,800
All right! "Female Pat Down."

248
00:08:37,868 --> 00:08:39,601
Let me see if I can remember.

249
00:08:39,677 --> 00:08:41,144
(muttering)

250
00:08:41,205 --> 00:08:43,293
Wow, you're remembering
the crap out of that song.

251
00:08:43,318 --> 00:08:45,018
ALL: ♪ It takes a lady ♪

252
00:08:45,043 --> 00:08:46,976
♪ To touch a lady ♪

253
00:08:47,001 --> 00:08:50,322
♪ But it takes a woman
to touch my heart ♪

254
00:08:50,678 --> 00:08:52,714
KAYLA (panting): 2-0.

255
00:08:52,783 --> 00:08:54,716
- You guys want a Benadryl?
- What? Why?

256
00:08:54,785 --> 00:08:56,985
'Cause it seems like you're
all allergic to the ball.

257
00:08:57,054 --> 00:08:59,621
Oh, okay. You're, like,
a super cool sports girl

258
00:08:59,690 --> 00:09:01,590
doing trash talk... good job.

259
00:09:01,659 --> 00:09:02,936
I got more where that came from,

260
00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:05,889
- Pink Ears Book Legs.
- (whistle blows)

261
00:09:06,967 --> 00:09:08,634
(grunting)

262
00:09:10,500 --> 00:09:13,101
- Oh, no. Oh, no.
- You can do it, Mara.

263
00:09:13,170 --> 00:09:14,602
No, no, no, no. Aah!

264
00:09:14,671 --> 00:09:17,238
Oh, good try, Mara... with your face.

265
00:09:17,307 --> 00:09:18,840
MARA: Is it... still on?

266
00:09:18,908 --> 00:09:20,458
Yeah, I mean, don't, don't
look at it for a while.

267
00:09:20,483 --> 00:09:21,809
- But it...
- MARA: Ow...

268
00:09:21,834 --> 00:09:23,512
You've probably always had
that soccer ball pattern

269
00:09:23,580 --> 00:09:24,512
on your forehead.

270
00:09:24,537 --> 00:09:27,103
♪ ♪

271
00:09:30,720 --> 00:09:33,821
♪ Parents make their kids
do this for a reason ♪

272
00:09:33,890 --> 00:09:36,858
♪ Parents make their kids
do this for a reason ♪

273
00:09:36,926 --> 00:09:40,327
♪ Is it 'cause they
hate their children? ♪

274
00:09:40,396 --> 00:09:44,431
♪ Parents make their kids
do this for a reason. ♪

275
00:09:44,500 --> 00:09:48,335
ALL: ♪ And that's whose bag it is. ♪

276
00:09:48,360 --> 00:09:50,203
Oh, okay, how 'bout we do something

277
00:09:50,228 --> 00:09:51,561
from a different musical?

278
00:09:51,586 --> 00:09:53,506
Aw, why not keep playing this one?

279
00:09:53,531 --> 00:09:54,609
Everyone loves it.

280
00:09:54,634 --> 00:09:56,014
- Well, I don't love it, okay?!
- (piano clangs)

281
00:09:56,039 --> 00:09:57,103
I don't love it!

282
00:09:57,128 --> 00:09:59,168
- Whoa.
- Why don't you love it,

283
00:09:59,193 --> 00:10:00,734
- Ms. Merkin?
- I don't want to talk about it.

284
00:10:00,759 --> 00:10:01,936
Well, if she doesn't
want to talk about it...

285
00:10:01,961 --> 00:10:03,234
All right, I'll tell you!

286
00:10:03,259 --> 00:10:05,797
I've been playing piano
for the community theater's

287
00:10:05,822 --> 00:10:07,039
production of TSA.

288
00:10:07,064 --> 00:10:08,230
- (gasps) What?!
- What?!

289
00:10:08,255 --> 00:10:10,742
But then the damn lead actress

290
00:10:10,767 --> 00:10:13,195
said I was missing cues
and playing off-tempo.

291
00:10:13,220 --> 00:10:15,019
So I quit, and I'm never going back.

292
00:10:15,044 --> 00:10:17,612
No, Ms. Merkin, we're never going back.

293
00:10:17,637 --> 00:10:20,805
Well, it's my Jo... I
don't... Who is... Who is he?

294
00:10:21,908 --> 00:10:23,578
7-0. Close game.

295
00:10:23,603 --> 00:10:24,593
What's your next move, big man?

296
00:10:24,618 --> 00:10:25,594
(whistle blows)

297
00:10:25,619 --> 00:10:27,018
End of the first quarter.

298
00:10:27,043 --> 00:10:29,164
Okay, so talk to me
about these quarters.

299
00:10:29,189 --> 00:10:31,445
How many more we got? One, zero...

300
00:10:31,470 --> 00:10:32,736
- Three.
- No...

301
00:10:32,761 --> 00:10:34,072
- Yeah.
- Not what I was hoping for.

302
00:10:34,097 --> 00:10:35,129
I know.

303
00:10:35,154 --> 00:10:36,287
Only three more goals

304
00:10:36,312 --> 00:10:37,912
before your team gets shutouted.

305
00:10:37,984 --> 00:10:41,152
Sorry, I don't speak "mean jock girl."
What are you saying?

306
00:10:41,177 --> 00:10:42,910
If the score gets to 10-0,

307
00:10:42,935 --> 00:10:44,825
the game is automatically over,

308
00:10:44,850 --> 00:10:47,500
which is automatically
embarrassing for you.

309
00:10:47,540 --> 00:10:49,240
Wait, like the game would be over over?

310
00:10:49,265 --> 00:10:50,664
Like I could go home?

311
00:10:50,689 --> 00:10:53,199
Yeah, back to the bookstore
that your legs live in.

312
00:10:53,224 --> 00:10:55,825
That's amazing. I mean, oh, no.

313
00:10:55,894 --> 00:10:57,994
Definitely don't want that to happen.

314
00:10:58,062 --> 00:10:59,596
Mm-Kay.

315
00:10:59,621 --> 00:11:02,387
That would be very
disappointing. Thank you.

316
00:11:02,412 --> 00:11:04,020
(quietly): Hey, you hear about
this shutout rule thing?

317
00:11:04,045 --> 00:11:06,602
Yeah. Three more goals,
and we're on our way back

318
00:11:06,671 --> 00:11:08,637
to Supreme Extreme Champions town.

319
00:11:08,662 --> 00:11:10,796
- That's my favorite town.
- I know.

320
00:11:10,821 --> 00:11:13,318
So I guess we just keep
doing what we're doing?

321
00:11:13,343 --> 00:11:14,410
You got it, Coach.

322
00:11:14,435 --> 00:11:16,202
Let's just be a little
discreet about this?

323
00:11:16,227 --> 00:11:18,570
Me be discreet... You be discreet.

324
00:11:20,318 --> 00:11:21,784
- BOB: Yes!
- LOUISE: Yes!

325
00:11:21,852 --> 00:11:24,252
I-I mean, that's all
right. That's all right.

326
00:11:24,277 --> 00:11:26,476
Yeah, we-we'll get
'em. We-We'll get 'em.

327
00:11:29,186 --> 00:11:31,186
Oh no! She stole the ball from me!

328
00:11:31,211 --> 00:11:32,610
Why?!

329
00:11:32,679 --> 00:11:34,145
It's hard to explain, Louise.

330
00:11:34,214 --> 00:11:36,281
Why does anyone steal
the ball from anyone?

331
00:11:36,350 --> 00:11:38,449
Yeah, I just don't
want to lose, you know?

332
00:11:38,518 --> 00:11:40,785
- And go home so soon.
- Hey, Coach.

333
00:11:40,854 --> 00:11:42,787
Really sorry this game
might be over so quickly.

334
00:11:42,856 --> 00:11:44,756
It's just hard to get
my girls to ease up.

335
00:11:44,824 --> 00:11:46,168
(chuckles) It's like telling a shark

336
00:11:46,192 --> 00:11:48,058
not to eat the saddest school of fish.

337
00:11:48,127 --> 00:11:49,660
- That's your team.
- Right.

338
00:11:49,729 --> 00:11:51,340
'Cause if you look at
them, they look really sad.

339
00:11:51,364 --> 00:11:52,941
- Right, right, right, yeah.
- And we're so strong.

340
00:11:52,965 --> 00:11:54,209
Yeah, I know. I got the analogy.

341
00:11:54,233 --> 00:11:55,777
Is there a problem
here? Hey, lady coach,

342
00:11:55,801 --> 00:11:57,045
why don't you go dribble something, huh?

343
00:11:57,069 --> 00:11:58,769
I'm walking away because I want to.

344
00:11:58,837 --> 00:12:00,971
Keep telling yourself that, sweetheart.

345
00:12:01,040 --> 00:12:03,807
I can't believe you
quit TSA: The Musical.

346
00:12:03,832 --> 00:12:06,657
What are you gonna do now,
just teach music to kids? Yuck.

347
00:12:06,682 --> 00:12:09,735
Well, they won't have Matilda
Merkin to kick around anymore.

348
00:12:09,760 --> 00:12:11,693
And their dumb CD player won't complain

349
00:12:11,718 --> 00:12:13,083
if they treat it like crap.

350
00:12:13,108 --> 00:12:14,708
I hope it skips.

351
00:12:14,733 --> 00:12:16,962
(gasps) They're doing
the show to a recording?

352
00:12:16,987 --> 00:12:18,907
That's Off-Broadway blasphemy.

353
00:12:18,932 --> 00:12:21,702
Yep. And they're gonna
burn in hell for it.

354
00:12:21,727 --> 00:12:23,259
Now, if you'll excuse me,

355
00:12:23,284 --> 00:12:26,507
I'm going to improvise
a sad song. (Humming)

356
00:12:26,532 --> 00:12:28,831
Um, piano bar manager meeting, Gene?

357
00:12:28,900 --> 00:12:30,466
Did I just get promoted to manager?

358
00:12:30,535 --> 00:12:31,867
I'm not ready.

359
00:12:31,937 --> 00:12:33,970
We got to get Ms.
Merkin back in that show.

360
00:12:33,995 --> 00:12:35,772
Guys, I don't want to
crash your manager meeting,

361
00:12:35,797 --> 00:12:38,498
but I was wondering if I could
just shadow Gene, maybe? Sit in?

362
00:12:38,523 --> 00:12:39,857
- Sure, sure.
- But, Mom,

363
00:12:39,882 --> 00:12:41,348
if we don't get her back in the show,

364
00:12:41,373 --> 00:12:43,106
she can live here with us forever.

365
00:12:43,131 --> 00:12:46,399
Piano bar every day and
all night, I'm assuming.

366
00:12:46,424 --> 00:12:47,590
Great managing, Gene.

367
00:12:47,615 --> 00:12:49,015
For the good of musicals everywhere,

368
00:12:49,040 --> 00:12:50,473
we got to make this right.

369
00:12:50,498 --> 00:12:51,907
(groans) Fine.

370
00:12:51,932 --> 00:12:53,976
Uh, excuse me for a second.

371
00:12:54,001 --> 00:12:57,665
Just gonna take the phone
into the kitchen, here, now.

372
00:12:57,690 --> 00:13:00,196
Hey, while you're back there,
any chance I could get a burger?

373
00:13:00,221 --> 00:13:01,485
Oh, yeah, we make food.

374
00:13:01,510 --> 00:13:03,208
Okay, got that out of my system.

375
00:13:03,233 --> 00:13:05,200
Now, who likes Oklahoma!?

376
00:13:05,269 --> 00:13:06,401
- (cheering)
- Ooh, ooh, me!

377
00:13:06,426 --> 00:13:07,992
(grunts, panting)

378
00:13:08,017 --> 00:13:10,150
- Out of my way.
- You got it, K-dog.

379
00:13:10,175 --> 00:13:11,208
Good hustle!

380
00:13:11,233 --> 00:13:12,732
Just have fun out there!

381
00:13:12,757 --> 00:13:14,204
Oh, God, not again.

382
00:13:15,618 --> 00:13:16,851
(shouts)

383
00:13:16,876 --> 00:13:17,876
Yes. I mean...

384
00:13:17,901 --> 00:13:20,060
(groaning): Oh, darn!

385
00:13:20,085 --> 00:13:21,185
That's 9-0.

386
00:13:21,210 --> 00:13:22,917
Stage is set for a comeback.

387
00:13:22,942 --> 00:13:25,799
- MAN: Good hustle!
- Just have fun out there!

388
00:13:25,824 --> 00:13:27,335
I feel like they just
keep saying the same thing

389
00:13:27,360 --> 00:13:28,592
over and over again.

390
00:13:28,617 --> 00:13:30,317
TINA: Hey, sideline, switch it up.

391
00:13:30,342 --> 00:13:31,375
Yeah, you, mom jeans.

392
00:13:31,400 --> 00:13:32,587
Shutouted coach says what?

393
00:13:32,612 --> 00:13:34,235
- What?
- (laughing): Yeah.

394
00:13:34,243 --> 00:13:37,530
Hey, Coach Christy, out of
curiosity, which one's your car?

395
00:13:37,555 --> 00:13:38,723
I'll be right back. Dad,
can I borrow your keys?

396
00:13:38,748 --> 00:13:39,913
- Tina, no.
- (grunting)

397
00:13:39,982 --> 00:13:41,148
Tina, let go.

398
00:13:43,130 --> 00:13:44,629
What are you doing here?

399
00:13:44,654 --> 00:13:47,237
Some lady called the theater
while we were rehearsing

400
00:13:47,262 --> 00:13:48,694
and said you wanted to come back,

401
00:13:48,719 --> 00:13:50,690
so we came because we want you back.

402
00:13:50,759 --> 00:13:53,193
- It was me, I'm the lady.
- Yeah, you are.

403
00:13:53,262 --> 00:13:54,827
What? I never said that.

404
00:13:54,852 --> 00:13:56,552
Matilda, we can't do
the show without you.

405
00:13:56,577 --> 00:13:58,485
We thought putting the
wig on the CD player

406
00:13:58,510 --> 00:14:00,910
would make it better,
but it just made it worse.

407
00:14:00,935 --> 00:14:03,658
I'm not coming back
unless Sheila apologizes.

408
00:14:03,683 --> 00:14:05,782
And I don't see her here, so...

409
00:14:05,807 --> 00:14:07,506
- Oh, I'm here.
- (gasping)

410
00:14:07,575 --> 00:14:09,108
But I'm not apologizing.

411
00:14:09,177 --> 00:14:10,843
Oh, my God, I love the theater.

412
00:14:10,912 --> 00:14:12,611
- (whistle blows)
- Is the game over?

413
00:14:12,681 --> 00:14:13,801
No, it's just halftime.

414
00:14:13,826 --> 00:14:15,558
So, how long is halftime?

415
00:14:15,583 --> 00:14:17,662
If everyone's feeling good,
can we just skip it, or...

416
00:14:17,686 --> 00:14:19,451
You're running for the Porta Potties.

417
00:14:19,520 --> 00:14:21,420
All right, talk to you when you get out.

418
00:14:21,489 --> 00:14:24,923
Well, better start
packing it in, huh, ladies?

419
00:14:24,992 --> 00:14:26,669
I hate getting shutouted.

420
00:14:26,694 --> 00:14:27,959
Me, too.

421
00:14:28,028 --> 00:14:29,528
I want to play the rest of the game.

422
00:14:29,597 --> 00:14:31,863
What? We're getting killed.

423
00:14:31,932 --> 00:14:34,010
- You want to keep going?
- Well, yeah, it's still fun.

424
00:14:34,034 --> 00:14:35,679
I mean, I don't like
when the ball comes to me,

425
00:14:35,703 --> 00:14:36,856
but that's so rare.

426
00:14:36,881 --> 00:14:38,047
Even you, Jodi?

427
00:14:38,088 --> 00:14:39,921
I mean, you look terrified out there.

428
00:14:39,973 --> 00:14:42,007
Mm, I like it. Some people
go on roller coasters,

429
00:14:42,076 --> 00:14:43,763
I sign up for soccer every year.

430
00:14:43,788 --> 00:14:45,387
It makes me feel alive.

431
00:14:45,412 --> 00:14:47,766
I just wish we didn't
get shutouted every game.

432
00:14:47,791 --> 00:14:50,358
W-Wait, you guys get
shutouted every game?

433
00:14:50,383 --> 00:14:52,662
Yeah. I don't even think they
had the rule until this season.

434
00:14:52,686 --> 00:14:54,019
They invented it just for us.

435
00:14:54,088 --> 00:14:55,787
- Halfway through our first game.
- Yeah.

436
00:14:55,856 --> 00:14:58,456
The other name for getting shutouted
is getting Gold Dragon-ed.

437
00:14:58,525 --> 00:15:00,203
Which my dad says is
also something you used to

438
00:15:00,227 --> 00:15:02,338
be able to do in the Philippines
when he was in the Navy,

439
00:15:02,362 --> 00:15:03,861
but I don't know what that means.

440
00:15:03,930 --> 00:15:05,796
It just would've been
nice to score one goal

441
00:15:05,865 --> 00:15:07,265
before the season's over.

442
00:15:07,290 --> 00:15:08,510
Yeah, it would've been, Harley.

443
00:15:08,535 --> 00:15:11,414
Uh, Dad, I can't
believe I'm saying this,

444
00:15:11,439 --> 00:15:13,480
but I don't want to get shutouted.

445
00:15:13,505 --> 00:15:15,305
Really? What about
Supreme Extreme Champions?

446
00:15:15,374 --> 00:15:17,108
And the fact that we both hate this?

447
00:15:17,176 --> 00:15:19,509
Yeah, well, the other
girls want to keep playing,

448
00:15:19,578 --> 00:15:21,612
and I guess it makes me kind of sort of

449
00:15:21,680 --> 00:15:23,214
want to finish the game, too.

450
00:15:23,282 --> 00:15:24,949
Those brave little idiots.

451
00:15:25,017 --> 00:15:26,316
They are brave.

452
00:15:26,385 --> 00:15:28,498
And extremely bad at soccer.

453
00:15:28,523 --> 00:15:31,221
So how do we not get shutouted?

454
00:15:31,290 --> 00:15:33,624
- I have no idea.
- (whistle blows)

455
00:15:33,649 --> 00:15:35,282
Second half starts in one minute.

456
00:15:35,307 --> 00:15:37,541
No paper in there, by the way. Anymore.

457
00:15:37,911 --> 00:15:39,911
Thirty seconds coaches.

458
00:15:39,936 --> 00:15:42,336
- All right, Gold, uh, huddle up.
- What do you got, Coach?

459
00:15:42,405 --> 00:15:44,997
Oh, well, I-I feel like,
uh, a lot of the time,

460
00:15:45,022 --> 00:15:47,689
when a team is behind, the-the
coach is supposed to give

461
00:15:47,758 --> 00:15:50,826
a big speech about leaving
it all on the court.

462
00:15:50,895 --> 00:15:53,028
I mean, the-the grass court.

463
00:15:53,096 --> 00:15:54,508
- What-what is this called?
- "Field," Coach.

464
00:15:54,532 --> 00:15:55,532
Really? "Field"?

465
00:15:55,599 --> 00:15:57,966
- What are we, farmers?
- I think it's "field," Coach.

466
00:15:58,035 --> 00:16:00,935
Right, right, field. Yeah, sorry.
Just sounded weird.

467
00:16:01,004 --> 00:16:02,203
- Anyway...
- (whistle blows)

468
00:16:02,272 --> 00:16:04,506
Oh, wait! Louise, Mara, uh, come back.

469
00:16:04,574 --> 00:16:06,541
I-I just had a-a
coachy thought.

470
00:16:06,609 --> 00:16:08,176
- Little late, huh?
- Shh.

471
00:16:08,201 --> 00:16:10,045
Mara, you're ready to get
out of the goal, right?

472
00:16:10,113 --> 00:16:11,446
Yeah.

473
00:16:11,515 --> 00:16:13,481
Great, how about this: Mara's forward,

474
00:16:13,550 --> 00:16:15,716
Louise, you be goalie.

475
00:16:15,785 --> 00:16:17,885
And here's the thing,
try and stop the ball

476
00:16:17,954 --> 00:16:21,188
when it goes... come...
go toward you, in the goal.

477
00:16:21,213 --> 00:16:22,746
Oh, God, Dad, no.

478
00:16:22,859 --> 00:16:24,379
It's just, I've seen you use your hands

479
00:16:24,427 --> 00:16:26,204
at the restaurant, and
goalies use their hands,

480
00:16:26,228 --> 00:16:28,696
and you're good with your
hands, so you can do it.

481
00:16:28,721 --> 00:16:30,418
Yeah, you slap stuff and people.

482
00:16:30,443 --> 00:16:32,676
I do slap stuff and people.

483
00:16:32,701 --> 00:16:34,535
Okay, so let's do my plan.

484
00:16:34,603 --> 00:16:36,136
(sighing): Okay, Coach.

485
00:16:36,205 --> 00:16:38,171
Coach, I backed you up on
that, but maybe in the future,

486
00:16:38,196 --> 00:16:39,982
run stuff by me first,
before you say it out loud?

487
00:16:40,007 --> 00:16:42,063
Okay, Louise, now the
ball probably won't

488
00:16:42,088 --> 00:16:43,287
come to you right away,

489
00:16:43,312 --> 00:16:45,179
but it could in this quarter, so...

490
00:16:45,247 --> 00:16:46,346
(whistle blows)

491
00:16:47,550 --> 00:16:49,315
- Oh, no!
- Oh, no.

492
00:16:49,384 --> 00:16:51,084
Oh, yeah!

493
00:16:55,156 --> 00:16:56,890
(gasps) The steamroller. Louise,

494
00:16:56,959 --> 00:16:59,659
- I have another coachy thought!
- Just shout it out!

495
00:16:59,684 --> 00:17:01,194
Or you can discuss it
with your assistant first.

496
00:17:01,262 --> 00:17:02,896
Louise, the steamroller!

497
00:17:02,965 --> 00:17:04,263
Oh, from the show!

498
00:17:04,288 --> 00:17:06,155
Yes! It'll cut off her angle!

499
00:17:06,180 --> 00:17:07,180
It's our only hope!

500
00:17:07,946 --> 00:17:10,213
(shouts)

501
00:17:10,447 --> 00:17:11,487
(distorted): What the...?

502
00:17:11,876 --> 00:17:13,008
(grunts)

503
00:17:15,276 --> 00:17:16,509
Ah, ha, ha!

504
00:17:16,578 --> 00:17:17,710
I've got it!

505
00:17:17,778 --> 00:17:19,612
(cheering)
- Yeah! -Yeah!

506
00:17:19,680 --> 00:17:21,247
Did Kayla not score?

507
00:17:21,316 --> 00:17:23,515
Kayla, don't wipe that
dirt off your face!

508
00:17:23,540 --> 00:17:25,995
You keep that on to
remind you of what you did!

509
00:17:26,020 --> 00:17:27,305
What... what do I do now?

510
00:17:27,330 --> 00:17:29,164
It, uh... throw it somewhere?

511
00:17:29,189 --> 00:17:31,724
- Kick it! Drop-kick that
son of a bitch! -(Grunts)

512
00:17:31,792 --> 00:17:33,058
Wow, that hurt my foot.

513
00:17:33,127 --> 00:17:34,459
Where were you?

514
00:17:34,528 --> 00:17:35,560
I play halfback.

515
00:17:35,630 --> 00:17:36,895
I was halfway back.

516
00:17:36,964 --> 00:17:38,630
Girls, don't throw grass like that.

517
00:17:38,698 --> 00:17:39,864
You throw it like this!

518
00:17:39,933 --> 00:17:41,199
Hey! (Scoffs)

519
00:17:41,268 --> 00:17:43,468
- Stop throwing grass.
- You stop it.

520
00:17:43,537 --> 00:17:46,104
You guys, get it together.

521
00:17:46,173 --> 00:17:47,372
Uh, Gold Dragons?

522
00:17:47,441 --> 00:17:49,040
- The ball?
- The ball?

523
00:17:49,109 --> 00:17:50,708
Yeah! You-you can, uh...

524
00:17:50,777 --> 00:17:51,809
you know. (Whistles)

525
00:17:51,878 --> 00:17:52,810
(gasps) Kick it?

526
00:17:52,879 --> 00:17:53,911
Mm-hmm.

527
00:17:53,980 --> 00:17:56,213
(grunts)

528
00:17:56,282 --> 00:17:58,315
(indistinct chatter)

529
00:18:00,785 --> 00:18:03,919
Guys, that's kind of distracting.

530
00:18:07,293 --> 00:18:08,293
(whistle blows)

531
00:18:08,361 --> 00:18:09,661
Goal.

532
00:18:09,729 --> 00:18:11,828
- (cheering)
- You did it! - Hell yeah!

533
00:18:11,897 --> 00:18:13,063
Hell yeah, Walter!

534
00:18:13,132 --> 00:18:14,806
We didn't get shutouted!

535
00:18:16,302 --> 00:18:18,068
(laughing): Yeah!

536
00:18:18,137 --> 00:18:19,137
Great job, girls!

537
00:18:19,205 --> 00:18:20,271
I'm coaching!

538
00:18:20,339 --> 00:18:21,738
I'm actually coaching!

539
00:18:21,807 --> 00:18:23,641
Harley, I will fix your ponytail!

540
00:18:23,709 --> 00:18:25,664
Mara, let me take a
whack at those shoelaces!

541
00:18:25,689 --> 00:18:27,054
Sami, you should live

542
00:18:27,079 --> 00:18:29,079
with whichever parent
makes you feel safe!

543
00:18:29,148 --> 00:18:30,446
CHRISTY: Not bad, Coach.

544
00:18:30,515 --> 00:18:32,515
That one moment when
you were good at it.

545
00:18:32,584 --> 00:18:34,851
It was a couple of really
good moments, technically.

546
00:18:34,920 --> 00:18:36,853
Yeah! Oh, uh, forget
about that shoelace.

547
00:18:36,922 --> 00:18:38,166
You're-you're gonna
have to cut those off.

548
00:18:38,190 --> 00:18:39,522
You got it, Coach.

549
00:18:39,606 --> 00:18:42,370
(whoops) (Cuban accent):
Fly, Pelican Brief, fly!

550
00:18:42,394 --> 00:18:43,554
- (whistle blows)
- Oh, right.

551
00:18:43,595 --> 00:18:44,994
We have to keep playing.

552
00:18:45,063 --> 00:18:46,429
You're a musical midget.

553
00:18:46,498 --> 00:18:48,298
You're a doddering old diva.

554
00:18:48,366 --> 00:18:50,032
This is the best day of my life.

555
00:18:50,101 --> 00:18:52,502
I know, but I'm worried
someone's gonna get killed.

556
00:18:52,571 --> 00:18:54,692
These are very sharp criticisms.

557
00:18:54,717 --> 00:18:57,906
Oh, okay, okay, wait,
wait, hold on a second.

558
00:18:57,931 --> 00:19:00,943
This is Gene and Linda's Piano
Bar: Show Tunes and Mouth Foods.

559
00:19:00,968 --> 00:19:02,600
And we like a little drama,

560
00:19:02,625 --> 00:19:05,125
but we can't let two
veterans of the stage fight...

561
00:19:05,150 --> 00:19:07,326
longer than you have
already been fighting.

562
00:19:07,351 --> 00:19:10,019
Ms. Merkin, did Sheila
ever have a good show?

563
00:19:10,088 --> 00:19:12,154
Sure. Thousands.

564
00:19:12,179 --> 00:19:13,845
Literally. She's older than dirt.

565
00:19:13,870 --> 00:19:16,158
- (grumbles)
- And, Sheila, did Ms. Merkin ever

566
00:19:16,183 --> 00:19:18,149
impress you with her impressive playing?

567
00:19:18,306 --> 00:19:20,439
Mm, eh, Matilda's been good

568
00:19:20,464 --> 00:19:23,198
since before she could
button her own bloomers.

569
00:19:23,223 --> 00:19:24,989
Wait, how long have you
two known each other?

570
00:19:25,102 --> 00:19:27,202
Forever. We're sisters.

571
00:19:27,271 --> 00:19:29,404
- (gasps) What? - What?
- Ooh, hot.

572
00:19:29,473 --> 00:19:31,873
Oh, my God, you have to make up.

573
00:19:31,898 --> 00:19:33,964
You're a showbiz family,
like the Smuckers Brothers

574
00:19:33,989 --> 00:19:35,787
or the Twisted Sisters.

575
00:19:35,812 --> 00:19:39,513
Oh, Sheila, I'm sorry if I
was late on a couple cues.

576
00:19:39,582 --> 00:19:42,083
Maybe I was jealous that you
were in the spotlight again.

577
00:19:42,108 --> 00:19:45,042
Oh, Matilda, I'm lost
without you backing me up.

578
00:19:45,067 --> 00:19:47,567
I sing like an old barn
cat when you're not there.

579
00:19:47,592 --> 00:19:49,657
Hey, how about another
number from the show?

580
00:19:49,726 --> 00:19:51,325
"If You See Something, Sing Something"?

581
00:19:51,394 --> 00:19:53,861
- You know my key.
- G-ish?

582
00:19:53,929 --> 00:19:57,898
♪ If your bags were out of
your possession at any time ♪

583
00:19:57,967 --> 00:20:00,901
♪ It could be bad,
it could be fine... ♪

584
00:20:00,926 --> 00:20:02,058
- Mom?
- Yeah?

585
00:20:02,171 --> 00:20:03,837
Weren't you making Teddy a burger?

586
00:20:03,906 --> 00:20:06,874
Is it possible it's still on
the grill, and it's on fire?

587
00:20:06,942 --> 00:20:08,754
- Oh, my God, Teddy's burger!
- Oh, God, oh, God.

588
00:20:08,778 --> 00:20:11,278
BOB: Honestly, leaving you two alone,

589
00:20:11,303 --> 00:20:13,237
I thought it would be way worse.

590
00:20:13,262 --> 00:20:14,829
No, it's not a fire fire.

591
00:20:14,854 --> 00:20:16,671
They're just putting out the smoke.

592
00:20:16,696 --> 00:20:19,207
BOB: Uh-huh. Did you guys have fun?

593
00:20:19,232 --> 00:20:21,065
- Oh, it was the best.
- I'm a manager now.

594
00:20:21,090 --> 00:20:23,102
And I'm a manager in training. Eh...

595
00:20:23,127 --> 00:20:25,091
- What?
- Nothing. How was the game?

596
00:20:25,160 --> 00:20:27,026
Great. We lost 21 to one.

597
00:20:27,095 --> 00:20:28,595
Oh, that's good, honey.

598
00:20:28,664 --> 00:20:31,030
- Is that good?
- I don't know sports or math.

599
00:20:31,099 --> 00:20:32,766
They gave their gosh darn all out there,

600
00:20:32,791 --> 00:20:34,236
and we're gonna do it again next season.

601
00:20:34,261 --> 00:20:35,826
- Oh, yeah, maybe not.
- Oh, no.

602
00:20:35,851 --> 00:20:37,618
But I can still assistant
coach again, right?

603
00:20:37,643 --> 00:20:39,149
Every damn day, Tina.

604
00:20:39,174 --> 00:20:40,372
I frickin' love you, man.

605
00:20:40,484 --> 00:20:42,351
Aw, you guys were having so much fun,

606
00:20:42,376 --> 00:20:44,777
you don't even care that you're
missing the Supreme marathon.

607
00:20:44,846 --> 00:20:46,490
- Oh, my God!
- (gasps) Go, go, go, go, go, go!

608
00:20:46,514 --> 00:20:48,325
No, the fire department
says we're not supposed

609
00:20:48,349 --> 00:20:50,216
to go upstairs... Oh, they're gone.

610
00:20:50,285 --> 00:20:53,364
♪ If your bags were out of
your possession at any time ♪

611
00:20:53,389 --> 00:20:56,465
♪ It could be bad,
it could be fine ♪

612
00:20:56,490 --> 00:20:59,512
♪ Don't leave it up
to the canine unit ♪

613
00:20:59,537 --> 00:21:02,204
♪ Security is fun and
we're all doin' it ♪

614
00:21:02,229 --> 00:21:03,829
♪ If you see something,
sing something ♪

615
00:21:03,897 --> 00:21:05,831
♪ Partner up and swing something ♪

616
00:21:05,899 --> 00:21:08,600
♪ Let your voices ring if
you see a-something strange ♪

617
00:21:08,713 --> 00:21:11,013
♪ I see something suspicious ♪

618
00:21:11,038 --> 00:21:12,304
GENE: Uh-oh.

619
00:21:12,329 --> 00:21:14,595
♪ Oh, you know I wish I didn't ♪

620
00:21:14,620 --> 00:21:17,755
♪ But it's better if I sing it ♪

621
00:21:17,780 --> 00:21:20,114
♪ So everyone will
know it's a thing ♪

622
00:21:20,139 --> 00:21:23,073
♪ Like a shady guy, a weird
suitcase, something... ♪