1 00:00:20,106 --> 00:00:21,934 TEDDY: Friday! So, any big weekend plans? 2 00:00:22,109 --> 00:00:24,024 ♪ Date night tonight ♪ 3 00:00:24,198 --> 00:00:25,850 ♪ Gonna go out, get some food ♪ 4 00:00:26,025 --> 00:00:27,461 ♪ Have a few drinks ♪ 5 00:00:27,635 --> 00:00:28,940 ♪ Forget we have kids for a little bit ♪ 6 00:00:29,115 --> 00:00:30,856 ♪ La, yeah. ♪What's the plan? 7 00:00:31,030 --> 00:00:32,292 I couldn't tell you if I wanted to. 8 00:00:32,466 --> 00:00:34,164 Only Bobby knows. He planned the whole thing. 9 00:00:34,338 --> 00:00:35,686 Yup. There will be dinner, drinks 10 00:00:35,860 --> 00:00:37,820 and entertainment.Ooh! 11 00:00:37,993 --> 00:00:39,517 The big three! Ha-cha-cha-cha![door opens] 12 00:00:39,691 --> 00:00:42,128 And... we're home. 13 00:00:42,302 --> 00:00:43,781 Whoa, what's that?The class pet. 14 00:00:43,956 --> 00:00:45,609 I'm taking care of it this weekend. 15 00:00:45,783 --> 00:00:47,438 You're fine with it.I'm... not. 16 00:00:47,612 --> 00:00:49,832 The permission slip I signed for you says you're fine with it. 17 00:00:50,006 --> 00:00:51,051 You're into it.[sneezes] 18 00:00:51,225 --> 00:00:52,530 Ugh, what's wrong with it? 19 00:00:52,704 --> 00:00:53,966 Weird fur, seizures, runny nose, 20 00:00:54,140 --> 00:00:55,664 runny eyes, runny everything. 21 00:00:55,838 --> 00:00:57,448 Everybody's got their something. 22 00:00:57,621 --> 00:00:59,667 There wasn't anyone else who wanted to take it? 23 00:00:59,841 --> 00:01:01,191 Just Wayne.Who's Wayne? 24 00:01:01,365 --> 00:01:03,540 Kid in my class. We had a tiny disagreement 25 00:01:03,715 --> 00:01:05,977 about who should take the chinchilla home this weekend. 26 00:01:06,153 --> 00:01:08,719 No! No! No! No! No!Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! 27 00:01:08,894 --> 00:01:10,025 Well, congratulations, I guess. 28 00:01:10,200 --> 00:01:12,159 Just, um, keep it out of our room. 29 00:01:12,332 --> 00:01:13,811 Yeah, yeah, okay, Dad. 30 00:01:13,986 --> 00:01:15,987 Aw, was your little friend Wayne upset? 31 00:01:16,162 --> 00:01:17,859 Ah, no. He was easy breezy. 32 00:01:18,033 --> 00:01:19,688 Ah! Remember, bedtime is 7:00, 33 00:01:19,861 --> 00:01:22,516 not too much TV, no sugary snacks, and pet with the grain. 34 00:01:22,691 --> 00:01:24,823 Pet with the grain! 35 00:01:24,996 --> 00:01:26,216 Okay, don't forget. 36 00:01:26,390 --> 00:01:28,087 Your father and I are going out tonight, 37 00:01:28,262 --> 00:01:30,350 so you're gonna babysit, Tina, right? 38 00:01:30,525 --> 00:01:31,742 About that. Um... 39 00:01:31,917 --> 00:01:33,441 I was talking to some other girls, 40 00:01:33,615 --> 00:01:35,746 and did you know some people get paid to babysit? 41 00:01:35,920 --> 00:01:37,358 Oh, boy, she's onto us. 42 00:01:37,531 --> 00:01:39,359 Okay, let's start the negotiation. 43 00:01:39,533 --> 00:01:41,057 A thousand dollars and a parking space. 44 00:01:41,230 --> 00:01:42,884 How about three dollars an hour? 45 00:01:43,058 --> 00:01:45,016 Okay, deal.Three dollars every hour? 46 00:01:45,192 --> 00:01:46,844 Whoa, whoa, whoa. We get a cut of this, right, Tina? 47 00:01:47,019 --> 00:01:47,890 Okay. 48 00:01:48,063 --> 00:01:49,370 But you all got to be in bed 49 00:01:49,543 --> 00:01:51,240 by the time we get home, or nobody sees a dime. 50 00:01:51,414 --> 00:01:53,242 No problem-- we can go to bed in our sleep. 51 00:01:53,417 --> 00:01:54,896 [singsongy]: Ooh, Bobby! 52 00:01:55,070 --> 00:01:56,420 I'm excited to see where you're taking me. 53 00:01:56,593 --> 00:01:58,378 Lin, you don't have to cover your eyes. 54 00:01:58,552 --> 00:01:59,902 I never asked you to do that. 55 00:02:00,075 --> 00:02:01,295 I just want a big surprise. 56 00:02:01,468 --> 00:02:02,730 And surprises are better when you're blind. 57 00:02:02,905 --> 00:02:03,731 Well, take a look. 58 00:02:03,906 --> 00:02:05,864 We're here! Huh? 59 00:02:06,037 --> 00:02:07,692 "Stoolz." It gets better. 60 00:02:07,865 --> 00:02:10,129 Bing-a-ding, bing-a-ding- ding-ding-ding, brainiacs! 61 00:02:10,304 --> 00:02:12,218 This is your trivia master Dave letting you know 62 00:02:12,393 --> 00:02:14,872 that we are less than one minute away from trivia night! 63 00:02:15,046 --> 00:02:16,135 Trivia night? 64 00:02:16,310 --> 00:02:18,050 Ugh. When does it get better, Bob? 65 00:02:18,224 --> 00:02:20,574 Well, that was supposed to be the part where it got better. 66 00:02:20,748 --> 00:02:22,271 Y-You love trivia. I do? 67 00:02:22,445 --> 00:02:24,099 We played bar trivia that one time years ago. 68 00:02:24,274 --> 00:02:26,057 Remember? Yeah? 69 00:02:26,233 --> 00:02:27,842 We had fun. We did? 70 00:02:28,016 --> 00:02:29,061 I thought we did. 71 00:02:29,235 --> 00:02:30,715 We had a funny team name. 72 00:02:30,889 --> 00:02:32,239 We were Albert Beerstein. 73 00:02:32,413 --> 00:02:33,762 That's funny?Yes, it's funny! 74 00:02:33,936 --> 00:02:35,502 It works on many levels, Lin! 75 00:02:35,676 --> 00:02:38,245 But, look, we can go somewhere else if you want to. 76 00:02:38,418 --> 00:02:39,723 No, let's just get through date night. 77 00:02:39,897 --> 00:02:40,724 Right. Okay. 78 00:02:40,899 --> 00:02:41,812 Mm-hmm, great. Fine. 79 00:02:41,986 --> 00:02:42,901 Yup, get a drink. Yeah. 80 00:02:43,074 --> 00:02:44,206 Okay, trivia-meisters. 81 00:02:44,381 --> 00:02:45,990 Round one, question one. 82 00:02:46,165 --> 00:02:49,081 When I was 14, I had a crush especial 83 00:02:49,256 --> 00:02:50,561 on Puerto Rican actress Rosie Perez. 84 00:02:50,735 --> 00:02:52,475 Oh, we got this. 85 00:02:52,650 --> 00:02:54,304 It's gonna be White Men Can't Jump. 86 00:02:54,478 --> 00:02:57,176 In what year did the United States annex Puerto Rico? 87 00:02:57,350 --> 00:02:59,265 Oh. Um, it's, um... um... 88 00:02:59,439 --> 00:03:01,006 19... something, something. 89 00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:03,270 You know what? The first question's always the hardest. 90 00:03:03,443 --> 00:03:05,314 All right, now that we got the easy one out of the way... 91 00:03:05,489 --> 00:03:06,837 Oh, crap. I mean, this will be fun. 92 00:03:07,012 --> 00:03:08,230 Yeah, it's fun, it's fun. 93 00:03:08,405 --> 00:03:10,973 It's like homework, but-but fun homework. 94 00:03:11,146 --> 00:03:12,278 How many rounds are there? 95 00:03:12,453 --> 00:03:14,497 Not-not many, but many. 96 00:03:14,671 --> 00:03:16,674 TINA: I just want you guys to know 97 00:03:16,848 --> 00:03:18,502 that even though I'm your paid babysitter tonight, 98 00:03:18,675 --> 00:03:20,548 I'm still your sister. But I'm getting paid. 99 00:03:20,722 --> 00:03:22,766 No feet on the couch. But I'm still your sister. 100 00:03:22,941 --> 00:03:23,854 For now. 101 00:03:24,028 --> 00:03:25,292 Until I get married off. 102 00:03:25,466 --> 00:03:27,032 All right, so, when you're with me, 103 00:03:27,206 --> 00:03:28,772 you're not called Princess Little Piddles. 104 00:03:28,947 --> 00:03:30,252 You are Shinobu. 105 00:03:30,426 --> 00:03:32,254 You like it? I know, it's great. 106 00:03:32,429 --> 00:03:33,822 This is Kuchi Kopi. 107 00:03:33,996 --> 00:03:35,127 You're both little troublemakers. 108 00:03:35,301 --> 00:03:36,737 You're both huge in Japan. 109 00:03:36,912 --> 00:03:38,521 You probably have a lot to talk about-- go! 110 00:03:38,695 --> 00:03:40,524 Keep things light. Don't bring up your divorce. 111 00:03:40,698 --> 00:03:42,091 Or Nixon. Or Radiohead.[phone ringing] 112 00:03:42,264 --> 00:03:43,788 Belcher residence. 113 00:03:43,961 --> 00:03:45,834 Both my parents are home tonight and they're black belts. 114 00:03:46,008 --> 00:03:46,835 Uh, it's for you, Louise. 115 00:03:47,009 --> 00:03:48,139 Really? Hello? 116 00:03:48,314 --> 00:03:49,620 Hey, Louise. Wayne here. 117 00:03:49,793 --> 00:03:51,187 Uh, so how's Princess Little Piddles? 118 00:03:51,360 --> 00:03:52,536 Fine. Great talk. Bye-bye. Wait! 119 00:03:52,710 --> 00:03:54,015 Put Princess on the phone.What? 120 00:03:54,189 --> 00:03:55,973 Put Princess Little Piddles 121 00:03:56,147 --> 00:03:57,324 on the phone! Why? 122 00:03:57,497 --> 00:03:58,802 Princess Little Piddles! 123 00:03:58,977 --> 00:04:00,675 Can you hear my voice?! Are you okay?! 124 00:04:00,848 --> 00:04:02,372 [groans] Bye. 125 00:04:02,545 --> 00:04:04,199 [doorbell rings]I'll get it since I'm in charge. 126 00:04:04,373 --> 00:04:06,070 While I'm gone, Gene's in charge. 127 00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:08,377 Louise, if Gene can't handle his duties, it's all you, sister. 128 00:04:08,551 --> 00:04:10,859 I can handle my doodies, thank you! 129 00:04:11,032 --> 00:04:12,468 [panting] I couldn't stop him! 130 00:04:12,643 --> 00:04:14,602 He barreled right past me like a really fast barrel! 131 00:04:14,776 --> 00:04:17,560 Oh, my God, Wayne, you were calling from outside my house? 132 00:04:17,735 --> 00:04:20,521 [shrieks, gasps] Out of cage! Out of cage! 133 00:04:20,694 --> 00:04:22,043 Okay, you're acting nuts, Wayne. 134 00:04:22,218 --> 00:04:24,524 Oh, you mean nuts for responsibility?! 135 00:04:24,699 --> 00:04:26,701 Like nut, crazy, bad, rotten nut! 136 00:04:26,875 --> 00:04:28,658 Responsible handsome head nuts maybe?! 137 00:04:28,832 --> 00:04:30,879 No, no way! Just nuts!No, handsome nuts! 138 00:04:31,052 --> 00:04:32,009 I know nuts!No, like cashews! 139 00:04:32,183 --> 00:04:33,576 Um, excuse me! 140 00:04:33,750 --> 00:04:34,925 I hate to interrupt a productive dialog, 141 00:04:35,100 --> 00:04:36,492 but where'd the chinchilla go? 142 00:04:36,667 --> 00:04:38,365 [shrieks] Uh, he's around here somewhere. 143 00:04:38,538 --> 00:04:40,062 [screams]Stop screaming 144 00:04:40,235 --> 00:04:41,932 and help me look, Wayne! 145 00:04:42,106 --> 00:04:44,935 Why is the front door open? 146 00:04:45,110 --> 00:04:47,374 Maybe God closed a window? 147 00:04:47,548 --> 00:04:49,201 EDITH: Chinchilla! Disgusting! 148 00:04:49,375 --> 00:04:50,855 Oh, no, no, no, no! 149 00:04:51,028 --> 00:04:52,682 [whimpering] 150 00:04:53,944 --> 00:04:54,771 There he is! 151 00:04:54,946 --> 00:04:56,382 [squeaking] 152 00:04:56,557 --> 00:04:57,557 Oh. 153 00:04:57,731 --> 00:05:00,038 Hey, little guy.It's Jonas. 154 00:05:00,211 --> 00:05:01,083 GENE: Oh, good, he's bringing him back. 155 00:05:01,257 --> 00:05:02,605 Jonas! Hey! 156 00:05:02,779 --> 00:05:05,086 You found our chinchilla! Thank you! 157 00:05:05,261 --> 00:05:07,567 What? I can't hear you! Bye! 158 00:05:07,742 --> 00:05:09,526 No! No! No! No!Wait! Wait! Wait! 159 00:05:09,699 --> 00:05:10,875 No! 160 00:05:11,048 --> 00:05:12,790 Oh, my God! What just happened?! 161 00:05:12,963 --> 00:05:16,403 It ran away and joined the worst biker gang in the world. 162 00:05:19,754 --> 00:05:21,581 Oh, Princess Little Piddles has been abducted! 163 00:05:21,755 --> 00:05:23,278 This is all your fault, Louise! 164 00:05:23,452 --> 00:05:25,499 What?! This is your fault, Wayne! 165 00:05:25,673 --> 00:05:28,197 You barged in to my house and left the door open! 166 00:05:28,370 --> 00:05:29,937 I was barging! 167 00:05:30,112 --> 00:05:32,026 Bargers are not responsible for closing the door! 168 00:05:32,201 --> 00:05:33,680 It's not a disaster. 169 00:05:33,855 --> 00:05:35,290 Jonas is the delivery boy at Reggie's Deli. 170 00:05:35,465 --> 00:05:36,726 We'll just go to Reggie's. 171 00:05:36,901 --> 00:05:39,163 We shouldn't be out! We should be back home! 172 00:05:39,338 --> 00:05:40,862 I'm not certified for outdoor child care! 173 00:05:41,036 --> 00:05:42,776 Tina, we're under your care, but this chinchilla is 174 00:05:42,951 --> 00:05:45,257 under my care, which technically falls under your jurisdiction. 175 00:05:45,432 --> 00:05:47,476 Right?I guess that's true. 176 00:05:47,651 --> 00:05:49,305 Or it might not make any sense at all... 177 00:05:49,478 --> 00:05:51,175 Well, we'll be back home in 20 minutes. 178 00:05:51,350 --> 00:05:53,134 All right, let's go to Reggie's. 179 00:05:53,308 --> 00:05:54,831 Aw, crap! Reggie's is closed. 180 00:05:55,005 --> 00:05:56,659 Oh, now what?! 181 00:05:56,834 --> 00:05:58,793 We smash Reggie's window and make some sandwiches 182 00:05:58,966 --> 00:05:59,968 and go from there. 183 00:06:00,141 --> 00:06:01,142 No, we go to where Reggie lives, 184 00:06:01,317 --> 00:06:02,971 and we ask him where Jonas lives. 185 00:06:03,144 --> 00:06:04,059 You want to know where Jonas lives? 186 00:06:04,233 --> 00:06:05,146 Well, take a number. 187 00:06:05,321 --> 00:06:06,495 Just kidding. Deli humor. 188 00:06:06,670 --> 00:06:07,975 Quit pussyfooting around! 189 00:06:08,149 --> 00:06:09,978 The address, Reggie! 190 00:06:10,151 --> 00:06:13,502 Uh, Jonas is at his friend Clay's house doing homework. 191 00:06:13,677 --> 00:06:15,504 Clay is at Jonas's house doing homework. 192 00:06:15,678 --> 00:06:17,332 What the...?Isn't he? 193 00:06:17,507 --> 00:06:19,161 How can they both be at each other's houses? 194 00:06:19,334 --> 00:06:21,163 Maybe they broke the space-time continuum. 195 00:06:21,336 --> 00:06:22,947 Must've been some homework. 196 00:06:23,120 --> 00:06:25,733 Unless it's an excuse teenagers tell their parents 197 00:06:25,906 --> 00:06:28,125 when they don't want them to know where they're going. 198 00:06:28,300 --> 00:06:29,519 But where would that be? 199 00:06:29,692 --> 00:06:31,956 A secret teen event of secrecy? 200 00:06:32,129 --> 00:06:33,000 You mean a party? 201 00:06:33,175 --> 00:06:34,175 Yes! Tina, thank you! 202 00:06:34,350 --> 00:06:35,481 Is that Teddy? 203 00:06:35,656 --> 00:06:37,526 ♪ I... ♪ 204 00:06:37,701 --> 00:06:39,572 ♪ Wish my radio worked. ♪ 205 00:06:39,747 --> 00:06:41,487 Oh, no! If Teddy sees us out of the house, 206 00:06:41,661 --> 00:06:44,490 he'll tell Mom and Dad. Everyone hide! 207 00:06:47,189 --> 00:06:48,146 [gasps] 208 00:06:48,319 --> 00:06:50,452 Huh? 209 00:06:50,627 --> 00:06:52,454 Oh, geez. Thought I saw Harvey. 210 00:06:52,629 --> 00:06:54,021 Ah, that was close. Listen. 211 00:06:54,196 --> 00:06:55,937 Why don't we go home, make a decoy chinchilla 212 00:06:56,110 --> 00:06:57,677 out of pipe cleaners and socks to buy ourselves some time? 213 00:06:57,851 --> 00:06:59,680 No, Tina, we're looking for a party. 214 00:06:59,853 --> 00:07:01,377 What do you know about high school parties? 215 00:07:01,550 --> 00:07:03,074 Nothing, but I might know someone 216 00:07:03,247 --> 00:07:04,685 who might know something. 217 00:07:04,858 --> 00:07:05,685 [doorbell rings] 218 00:07:05,860 --> 00:07:06,774 [groans] 219 00:07:06,947 --> 00:07:08,557 What do you maxi-sads want? 220 00:07:08,731 --> 00:07:10,341 DAVE: Okay, after round one, 221 00:07:10,516 --> 00:07:12,343 in first place are the DILFs. 222 00:07:12,519 --> 00:07:13,824 In second place, Old Kevin. 223 00:07:13,997 --> 00:07:15,738 And in last place, with no correct answers, 224 00:07:15,913 --> 00:07:17,697 are the Date Nights of the Round Table. 225 00:07:17,872 --> 00:07:19,089 [whoops] 226 00:07:19,264 --> 00:07:21,004 Hey! First couple ever here on a date! 227 00:07:21,178 --> 00:07:23,834 I guess the romance doesn't revolve around knowing things, 228 00:07:24,007 --> 00:07:24,879 because they don't. 229 00:07:25,052 --> 00:07:26,096 [laughs] 230 00:07:26,271 --> 00:07:28,665 Hey, hey! Easy, Mr. Questions! 231 00:07:28,838 --> 00:07:30,057 Just kidding, just kidding. 232 00:07:30,231 --> 00:07:31,101 [whispering]: I'm not kidding. 233 00:07:31,276 --> 00:07:32,189 They can't hear me. 234 00:07:32,363 --> 00:07:33,408 They don't know anything. 235 00:07:33,582 --> 00:07:34,584 Oh, my God, we're losing. 236 00:07:34,757 --> 00:07:35,846 And now we're getting heckled. 237 00:07:36,019 --> 00:07:37,281 I guess we can just go home. 238 00:07:37,456 --> 00:07:38,370 All right, let's get out of here. 239 00:07:38,545 --> 00:07:40,067 Let me just go to the bathroom. 240 00:07:40,242 --> 00:07:41,591 Round two, question one. 241 00:07:41,764 --> 00:07:43,375 Hiking is stupid. How many miles long is 242 00:07:43,550 --> 00:07:44,725 the Appalachian Trail?I was hoping there'd be 243 00:07:44,899 --> 00:07:46,204 more questions about '80s TV shows. 244 00:07:46,377 --> 00:07:47,423 [quietly]: Bob, I did something bad. 245 00:07:47,596 --> 00:07:49,163 In the bathroom? No! 246 00:07:49,338 --> 00:07:51,209 Look! I stole an answer sheet from Dave's folder! 247 00:07:51,382 --> 00:07:52,906 We got all the answers!What?! 248 00:07:53,081 --> 00:07:54,908 Lin, are you crazy? We can't cheat. 249 00:07:55,082 --> 00:07:57,389 Oh, yeah, we don't want to cheat against Dave. 250 00:07:57,564 --> 00:07:58,869 He's such a good guy. 251 00:07:59,043 --> 00:08:00,391 Uh...Write down the answer, Bob. 252 00:08:00,567 --> 00:08:01,785 Write it down! Okay, okay. 253 00:08:01,959 --> 00:08:03,569 Not like that, like you just thought of it. 254 00:08:03,744 --> 00:08:05,266 You look at the ceiling, you say, "Hmm," 255 00:08:05,440 --> 00:08:06,702 and then you look down. Hmm. 256 00:08:06,877 --> 00:08:08,617 Yeah, yeah. That's it, that's it. 257 00:08:08,791 --> 00:08:10,098 I might be able to find out 258 00:08:10,271 --> 00:08:12,403 which high school party this Jonas kid is at, 259 00:08:12,579 --> 00:08:14,189 but why would I want to help a bunch of babies 260 00:08:14,362 --> 00:08:15,495 get their cat back? 261 00:08:15,668 --> 00:08:17,497 It's not a cat, it's a chinchilla! 262 00:08:17,670 --> 00:08:19,106 Anything that's not a dog is a cat to me. 263 00:08:19,281 --> 00:08:21,500 We'll owe you. You name it. Anything, anytime. 264 00:08:21,675 --> 00:08:23,632 What if I want Tina to kiss a dirty flip-flop at 3:00 a.m. 265 00:08:23,807 --> 00:08:24,894 on a Tuesday?Let's not go crazy... 266 00:08:25,069 --> 00:08:26,636 Of course. Yes. That.No, no, no. 267 00:08:26,810 --> 00:08:28,812 I'm gonna think of something good to make Tina do later 268 00:08:28,985 --> 00:08:30,814 when I'm feeling really bad about myself. 269 00:08:30,987 --> 00:08:32,163 But we've got a deal. 270 00:08:32,336 --> 00:08:33,424 Whoa, that's a lot of technology. 271 00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:35,471 We get it. You have e-mail. 272 00:08:35,644 --> 00:08:36,951 [groans] I'm using social media 273 00:08:37,125 --> 00:08:39,169 to triangulate Jonas's whereabouts. Look. 274 00:08:39,344 --> 00:08:41,520 Jonas is friends with David Schnabel, who just tweeted 275 00:08:41,695 --> 00:08:43,523 at Vanessa Jackson, "See you at Casey's party." 276 00:08:43,697 --> 00:08:45,263 And according to Leilani LeFelt's secret blog 277 00:08:45,437 --> 00:08:46,655 she thinks no one knows about, 278 00:08:46,830 --> 00:08:48,528 Jonas has a huge crush on Vanessa. 279 00:08:48,701 --> 00:08:51,312 So that means Jonas is at Casey's party. Voila. 280 00:08:51,486 --> 00:08:53,096 All right, troops, wheels up, we're flying! 281 00:08:53,270 --> 00:08:55,534 I-I don't think we can go to a high school party, Louise. 282 00:08:55,709 --> 00:08:56,753 Mom and Dad will kill me. 283 00:08:56,927 --> 00:08:58,363 There'll be high school boys there. 284 00:08:58,538 --> 00:09:00,104 Right. Maybe we can just do a quick pop-in. 285 00:09:00,278 --> 00:09:01,845 Oh, wait, you think you're gonna get into that party? 286 00:09:02,019 --> 00:09:03,933 Oh, you are never gonna get in. I wouldn't even get in, 287 00:09:04,107 --> 00:09:06,023 and I'm the hottest girl in eighth grade. 288 00:09:06,197 --> 00:09:08,285 You're in eighth grade? I thought you were someone's mom. 289 00:09:08,460 --> 00:09:09,591 Trust me, Tammy. 290 00:09:09,765 --> 00:09:11,115 Getting in is gonna be the easy part. 291 00:09:11,288 --> 00:09:13,116 I've gotten into the teacher's lounge so many times 292 00:09:13,291 --> 00:09:14,640 I have my own coffee mug there. 293 00:09:14,815 --> 00:09:16,206 It says "I hate Mondays." Classic. 294 00:09:16,380 --> 00:09:17,991 Mm... I'm cashing in my favor. 295 00:09:18,166 --> 00:09:19,863 If you can get me into that party, we're even. 296 00:09:20,037 --> 00:09:21,691 Let's go! Every minute of our life 297 00:09:21,865 --> 00:09:24,172 is five minutes of a chinchilla's life! 298 00:09:25,695 --> 00:09:27,827 Aha! Here's our ticket into this poop show. 299 00:09:28,001 --> 00:09:29,350 How is trash gonna help us? 300 00:09:29,524 --> 00:09:31,831 Oh, Wayne. Watch and learn. 301 00:09:32,005 --> 00:09:33,659 [doorbell rings] 302 00:09:33,834 --> 00:09:36,400 Well, someone did. What? 303 00:09:36,576 --> 00:09:38,360 Did you say, "We didn't order any pizza"? 304 00:09:38,533 --> 00:09:40,667 No. Well, someone did. 305 00:09:40,841 --> 00:09:42,364 And old man pizza boss is gonna 306 00:09:42,538 --> 00:09:44,192 have my ass if I don't deliver it. 307 00:09:44,365 --> 00:09:45,496 Where's the bathroom? 308 00:09:45,672 --> 00:09:47,238 Uh, down that way. Thanks. 309 00:09:47,412 --> 00:09:49,370 I'll be out of there in 30 minutes or less. 310 00:09:49,544 --> 00:09:50,850 Hang on, Atlas. We're coming, buddy. 311 00:09:51,024 --> 00:09:52,548 Who's Atlas? 312 00:09:52,721 --> 00:09:54,724 [sighs] It's my secret name for Princess Little Piddles. 313 00:09:54,898 --> 00:09:56,725 Really? Huh. I call him Shinobu. 314 00:09:56,899 --> 00:09:58,902 Princess Little Piddles-- it just isn't right. 315 00:09:59,076 --> 00:10:01,904 I know. Fourth-graders shouldn't be in charge of names. 316 00:10:02,078 --> 00:10:03,254 Or sex determination. 317 00:10:03,427 --> 00:10:04,908 He has testicles, for God's sake! 318 00:10:05,081 --> 00:10:07,258 I know! I told them, "Guys, those are testicles!" 319 00:10:07,432 --> 00:10:08,650 No one believed me! 320 00:10:08,825 --> 00:10:10,392 Everyone thought they were butt boobs! 321 00:10:10,566 --> 00:10:11,523 [grunts] 322 00:10:11,697 --> 00:10:13,221 I can't believe that worked. 323 00:10:13,394 --> 00:10:14,657 Whew! Well done, Gene. 324 00:10:14,831 --> 00:10:17,051 Aw... are you going to the bathroom? 325 00:10:17,225 --> 00:10:18,835 Um... no? 326 00:10:19,009 --> 00:10:20,140 Oh, my God! 327 00:10:23,360 --> 00:10:25,754 [groans] A high school party is no place for a small animal! 328 00:10:25,928 --> 00:10:27,235 They're probably playing Spin the Chinchilla 329 00:10:27,408 --> 00:10:28,278 with him right now! 330 00:10:28,452 --> 00:10:29,802 Uh, let's just focus here. 331 00:10:29,976 --> 00:10:31,195 If you were a teenager with a chinchilla, 332 00:10:31,369 --> 00:10:32,240 where would you be? 333 00:10:32,413 --> 00:10:33,633 Chinchilla-con. 334 00:10:33,807 --> 00:10:35,373 So this is our first high school party. 335 00:10:35,547 --> 00:10:37,071 Let's savor this moment. 336 00:10:37,245 --> 00:10:38,725 High school boys' butts are higher up, I'm noticing. 337 00:10:38,899 --> 00:10:40,639 Okay, incoming teen dream, two o'clock-- 338 00:10:40,813 --> 00:10:42,903 if I'm using that term correctly, which I don't know, 339 00:10:43,076 --> 00:10:45,253 because I actually can't tell time on those round clocks. 340 00:10:45,427 --> 00:10:46,994 Ring the flirt alarm, here I go. 341 00:10:47,168 --> 00:10:49,865 Yeah, it's just like ding-dong, ring-a-ding, let this rip. 342 00:10:50,039 --> 00:10:51,519 Hey, what grade are you guys in? 343 00:10:51,693 --> 00:10:54,957 [moans] [babbles] 344 00:10:55,131 --> 00:10:56,394 Forget it. Bye. 345 00:10:56,567 --> 00:10:57,700 I can't feel my arms! I can't move! 346 00:10:57,874 --> 00:10:59,701 Oh, God, he was taller than my dad! 347 00:10:59,875 --> 00:11:01,312 Oh, God, another one's coming! 348 00:11:01,485 --> 00:11:04,576 [panting] [babbling] 349 00:11:04,750 --> 00:11:06,534 On the Internet, you can be whoever you want, 350 00:11:06,708 --> 00:11:08,144 and no one will ever know. 351 00:11:08,318 --> 00:11:10,451 Where does the word "modem" come from? 352 00:11:10,625 --> 00:11:12,802 [whispering]: Should we get this one wrong? Just to not look suspicious? 353 00:11:12,975 --> 00:11:15,370 No. We know this one.We don't know it-- we're cheating. 354 00:11:15,543 --> 00:11:17,894 Well, now we know it, and we're not getting it wrong.Okay. 355 00:11:18,067 --> 00:11:19,591 [loudly]: You know the answer, DILFs? 356 00:11:19,765 --> 00:11:21,592 Old Kevin? Because we do. 357 00:11:21,768 --> 00:11:23,421 [imitates modem] 358 00:11:23,595 --> 00:11:24,639 Lin. What? 359 00:11:24,813 --> 00:11:25,772 What is that? It's a modem. 360 00:11:25,946 --> 00:11:27,120 I'm making modem noises at them. 361 00:11:27,294 --> 00:11:28,251 It-it's more like this. 362 00:11:28,426 --> 00:11:30,124 [imitates modem] 363 00:11:30,298 --> 00:11:32,952 [both imitating modems] 364 00:11:33,126 --> 00:11:36,129 Okay, good modem noises, Date Nights of the Round Table. 365 00:11:36,303 --> 00:11:37,434 Now back to the questions. 366 00:11:37,609 --> 00:11:40,177 [both imitating modems] 367 00:11:40,350 --> 00:11:41,308 DAVE: Okay, okay! 368 00:11:41,482 --> 00:11:42,309 Tina. What? 369 00:11:42,484 --> 00:11:43,876 I have to fart. 370 00:11:44,051 --> 00:11:46,052 It's a fear fart. I... [grunts] I can't hold it. 371 00:11:46,226 --> 00:11:47,836 Tammy, no! You can't fart at a high school party. 372 00:11:48,010 --> 00:11:49,360 I know that! Don't you think I know that?! 373 00:11:49,533 --> 00:11:51,100 Okay, I'm gonna fix this, honey. 374 00:11:51,274 --> 00:11:52,841 Can you hold it real tight until I get you to a window? 375 00:11:53,015 --> 00:11:54,104 I'm gonna pick you up now. 376 00:11:54,278 --> 00:11:55,105 [both grunt] Gentle. 377 00:11:55,278 --> 00:11:56,105 Don't squeeze. 378 00:11:56,279 --> 00:11:57,150 [both grunt] 379 00:11:57,325 --> 00:11:58,629 Excuse us. Coming through. 380 00:11:58,804 --> 00:12:00,676 Just a couple of normal teenagers partying. 381 00:12:00,850 --> 00:12:02,982 Hi. How are you? How are you doing? Go, go. 382 00:12:03,157 --> 00:12:04,461 [farts] 383 00:12:04,635 --> 00:12:06,028 [sighs] 384 00:12:06,202 --> 00:12:08,205 Tina, you literally just saved my life. 385 00:12:08,379 --> 00:12:10,163 I am not gonna forget this until the day I die. 386 00:12:10,337 --> 00:12:12,296 That's so... Oh, my God, this girl farted! 387 00:12:12,470 --> 00:12:13,732 Right here, over here! What? 388 00:12:13,907 --> 00:12:14,821 I'm kidding, I'm kidding, I'm kidding. 389 00:12:14,995 --> 00:12:15,995 Nobody's listening to us. 390 00:12:16,169 --> 00:12:17,692 Jonas-- bingo. 391 00:12:17,866 --> 00:12:19,302 Whoa. Knock-knock. 392 00:12:19,476 --> 00:12:20,609 Who's there? Uh, you guys. 393 00:12:20,783 --> 00:12:22,131 You guys who? 394 00:12:22,306 --> 00:12:24,177 That's right, you're not supposed to be here. 395 00:12:24,351 --> 00:12:26,745 Give us the chinchilla, Jonas. It's ours. 396 00:12:26,919 --> 00:12:29,182 It's the fourth-grade class pet, for crying out loud. 397 00:12:29,356 --> 00:12:31,184 What? Oh, well, sorry, I didn't know that. 398 00:12:31,359 --> 00:12:33,403 I thought he was a gremlin, and I was like, 399 00:12:33,577 --> 00:12:35,231 "What? Gremlins are real?" 400 00:12:35,405 --> 00:12:36,494 Anyway, I gave him to Vanessa. What?! What?! 401 00:12:36,668 --> 00:12:38,235 Where's Vanessa? 402 00:12:38,408 --> 00:12:40,019 She took it, went off with some of her friends, 403 00:12:40,193 --> 00:12:42,849 and they were like, "Girls only, except these three guys." 404 00:12:43,023 --> 00:12:44,633 [chuckles]Where did they go? 405 00:12:44,807 --> 00:12:46,721 I don't know. They were talking about going roller-skating. 406 00:12:46,895 --> 00:12:47,722 Wherever you do that. 407 00:12:47,897 --> 00:12:49,289 The roller rink, maybe? 408 00:12:49,463 --> 00:12:50,465 Oh, yeah. 409 00:12:50,639 --> 00:12:52,032 Oh, I'm gonna slap you. 410 00:12:52,206 --> 00:12:52,902 What? 411 00:12:53,076 --> 00:12:54,163 Ow, my moneymaker! 412 00:12:54,337 --> 00:12:56,036 Here, let me see that for a second. 413 00:12:56,210 --> 00:12:56,863 Ow! 414 00:12:57,037 --> 00:12:58,341 Oh, you found Jonas. 415 00:12:58,515 --> 00:12:59,342 Hi, Jonas. 416 00:12:59,517 --> 00:13:01,302 Hey... 417 00:13:01,475 --> 00:13:02,782 you, girl. 418 00:13:02,956 --> 00:13:04,217 Whew, I was afraid you wouldn't remember me. 419 00:13:04,392 --> 00:13:05,784 Does this mean we got the chinchilla back? 420 00:13:05,958 --> 00:13:07,481 Because Mom and Dad could be home any minute. 421 00:13:07,655 --> 00:13:11,051 No. Jonas gave him away, and now he's at a roller rink. 422 00:13:11,225 --> 00:13:12,355 [groans] 423 00:13:12,529 --> 00:13:14,183 Jonas, what does Vanessa look like? 424 00:13:14,357 --> 00:13:16,707 I don't know. She has hair and pants. 425 00:13:16,883 --> 00:13:19,058 Great description-- you should work for the FBI. 426 00:13:19,232 --> 00:13:21,408 Listen, you're coming with us to point out who she is. 427 00:13:21,582 --> 00:13:22,583 Why would I do that? 428 00:13:22,758 --> 00:13:24,193 You guys belong together. 429 00:13:24,368 --> 00:13:26,370 You have the thing, she has her thing. 430 00:13:26,543 --> 00:13:28,503 Yeah, it's the opposite of "opposites attract." 431 00:13:28,677 --> 00:13:30,025 This is Jonas time. 432 00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:31,418 This is what you've been training for. 433 00:13:31,592 --> 00:13:32,549 You got to go with us. 434 00:13:32,724 --> 00:13:34,248 Oh, my God. Let's go! 435 00:13:34,422 --> 00:13:35,552 I'm coming, Shinobu. 436 00:13:35,726 --> 00:13:37,120 I'm coming, Atlas. 437 00:13:37,293 --> 00:13:39,034 I'm coming, roller rink snack bar hot dogs! 438 00:13:42,298 --> 00:13:44,562 All right, there's the rink. Let's go get our chinchilla. 439 00:13:44,735 --> 00:13:45,999 Oh, God, you don't think 440 00:13:46,173 --> 00:13:47,390 they have strobe lights in there, do you? 441 00:13:47,565 --> 00:13:48,610 Probably. Why? 442 00:13:48,783 --> 00:13:50,090 Strobe lights give him seizures. 443 00:13:50,264 --> 00:13:52,134 Oh, right, the strobe light incident. 444 00:13:52,308 --> 00:13:55,138 Why did Alfonz bring a strobe light to show and tell? 445 00:13:55,312 --> 00:13:57,096 WAYNE: Ugh, 'cause his grandfather invented it. 446 00:13:57,270 --> 00:13:59,011 Oh, my God, is that Teddy again? 447 00:13:59,186 --> 00:14:02,537 Ugh, pad thai is not good driving food. 448 00:14:02,711 --> 00:14:03,711 Uh, everyone freeze! 449 00:14:03,885 --> 00:14:05,061 Huh? Why are we freezing? 450 00:14:05,235 --> 00:14:06,628 If we don't move, he can't see us. 451 00:14:06,802 --> 00:14:07,759 Is that true?Maybe. 452 00:14:07,933 --> 00:14:08,934 Hold your breath! 453 00:14:09,109 --> 00:14:10,500 Oh, shoot, I just remembered 454 00:14:10,674 --> 00:14:11,458 I'm allergic to peanuts. 455 00:14:11,633 --> 00:14:12,938 [hacks] 456 00:14:13,113 --> 00:14:14,244 I'll be all right. I'll be all right. 457 00:14:14,418 --> 00:14:15,288 [hacks] 458 00:14:15,462 --> 00:14:16,419 Oh, my God, it worked. 459 00:14:16,594 --> 00:14:18,030 Tina's a wizard. 460 00:14:18,205 --> 00:14:20,163 Do something else. Make a jean jacket appear on me. 461 00:14:20,336 --> 00:14:21,076 Jean jacket! 462 00:14:21,250 --> 00:14:22,513 [Dave imitates air horn] 463 00:14:22,687 --> 00:14:24,341 It's time for the final round. 464 00:14:24,514 --> 00:14:26,691 And incredibly, the seemingly dimwitted Date Nighters have 465 00:14:26,865 --> 00:14:28,258 rocketed into first place. 466 00:14:28,432 --> 00:14:29,956 Yeah, Date Nighters! 467 00:14:30,129 --> 00:14:31,304 We're smart, and cute! 468 00:14:31,479 --> 00:14:32,306 Cuter than the DILFs! 469 00:14:32,480 --> 00:14:33,915 [booing] Yeah. 470 00:14:34,090 --> 00:14:35,438 All right, okay, settle down. Question one: 471 00:14:35,613 --> 00:14:37,354 I've never been a carpenter or on a boat, 472 00:14:37,528 --> 00:14:39,835 but Kurt Russell did both in what 1987 movie? 473 00:14:40,009 --> 00:14:41,357 [whispering]: Lin, where's the answer sheet? 474 00:14:41,532 --> 00:14:43,707 Uh... [gasps] Oh, no, it fell. 475 00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:45,274 Oh, God, get it, Lin. You're closer. 476 00:14:45,448 --> 00:14:46,581 Shh, I got it, I got it. 477 00:14:46,754 --> 00:14:48,669 [loudly]: Oops, I dropped some hummus. 478 00:14:48,844 --> 00:14:50,802 Hello, just getting that hummus there. 479 00:14:50,976 --> 00:14:52,500 Okay.We love hummus. 480 00:14:52,673 --> 00:14:53,980 Hey, what's that? 481 00:14:54,153 --> 00:14:55,459 What? That's an answer sheet. 482 00:14:55,633 --> 00:14:57,287 Nah.Uh, yeah, definitely. 483 00:14:57,461 --> 00:14:58,505 No. No, no. You were cheating, you're cheating. 484 00:14:58,679 --> 00:14:59,681 Cheaters! No one's cheating. 485 00:14:59,855 --> 00:15:00,682 No. Total cheaters! 486 00:15:00,855 --> 00:15:01,812 Full-on cheaters! 487 00:15:01,988 --> 00:15:03,379 Okay, you know what? 488 00:15:03,553 --> 00:15:04,729 We were cheating. 489 00:15:04,903 --> 00:15:06,208 I took my wife here on date. 490 00:15:06,383 --> 00:15:08,168 We have about three of these a year. 491 00:15:08,341 --> 00:15:09,517 In a good year. 492 00:15:09,691 --> 00:15:10,778 And I brought her to bar trivia. 493 00:15:10,952 --> 00:15:12,432 I screwed up. 494 00:15:12,606 --> 00:15:14,390 And you didn't help, Dave. You made us feel stupid, 495 00:15:14,565 --> 00:15:17,698 just because we didn't know the answers to any of the questions. 496 00:15:17,873 --> 00:15:19,004 I know that was fun for Kevin. 497 00:15:19,178 --> 00:15:20,701 [laughs]I know, I know. 498 00:15:20,875 --> 00:15:22,659 But my wife found a way to make 499 00:15:22,833 --> 00:15:24,009 this date night fun, and, damn it, 500 00:15:24,183 --> 00:15:25,663 I'm not sorry about that. 501 00:15:25,836 --> 00:15:26,794 So sweet. 502 00:15:26,969 --> 00:15:28,491 You're out of here! Deborah! 503 00:15:28,666 --> 00:15:29,537 No, it... 504 00:15:29,711 --> 00:15:30,841 Hands off, Deborah. 505 00:15:31,017 --> 00:15:33,019 Hey! Ow![grunts] 506 00:15:33,192 --> 00:15:34,672 Wow, I'm sorry, Lin. 507 00:15:34,846 --> 00:15:36,673 That was, uh... 508 00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:41,897 ...worth it. [whoops] Hot one. 509 00:15:42,071 --> 00:15:43,681 Next date night, let's cheat at karaoke. 510 00:15:43,855 --> 00:15:45,682 LOUISE: All right, Jonas, 511 00:15:45,856 --> 00:15:46,683 where's Vanessa? 512 00:15:46,857 --> 00:15:47,684 Where's my chinchilla? 513 00:15:47,859 --> 00:15:48,990 Ourchinchilla. 514 00:15:49,164 --> 00:15:50,993 Okay, Vanessa, love of my life. 515 00:15:51,167 --> 00:15:53,038 Let's see. There she is! 516 00:15:54,735 --> 00:15:56,129 Let's go, let's go! 517 00:15:56,302 --> 00:15:58,217 Time to roll my way into Vanessa's heart. 518 00:15:58,392 --> 00:16:00,046 Vanessa, where's the chinchilla? 519 00:16:00,220 --> 00:16:01,524 What?Princess Little Piddles! 520 00:16:01,698 --> 00:16:02,482 What's "Piddles"? 521 00:16:02,657 --> 00:16:04,179 He's our class pet. 522 00:16:04,354 --> 00:16:06,182 Oh, I'm sorry, little kids, but that security guard 523 00:16:06,355 --> 00:16:08,009 offered me 40 bucks for it. 524 00:16:08,183 --> 00:16:09,880 Oh, my God! How could you? 525 00:16:10,056 --> 00:16:10,926 It was easy. 526 00:16:11,100 --> 00:16:12,580 He was like, "Here's $40." 527 00:16:12,754 --> 00:16:14,015 And I was like, "Here you go." 528 00:16:14,190 --> 00:16:15,495 [groans] Come on! 529 00:16:15,669 --> 00:16:16,888 Oh, Vanessa, that kid Jonas likes you, 530 00:16:17,062 --> 00:16:18,325 and you should give him a chance. 531 00:16:18,499 --> 00:16:20,804 Or not. Your call.What? I can't hear you. 532 00:16:20,980 --> 00:16:22,416 The music's too loud. I got to skate. 533 00:16:22,590 --> 00:16:23,894 Hey, Vanessa! 534 00:16:24,070 --> 00:16:24,895 Wait for me! 535 00:16:25,071 --> 00:16:26,549 Hey, sir? Yeah. 536 00:16:26,724 --> 00:16:28,509 Can you push me towards that girl over there? 537 00:16:28,682 --> 00:16:29,726 All right. 538 00:16:29,900 --> 00:16:30,859 [grunts] He touched my butt. 539 00:16:31,033 --> 00:16:32,381 Excuse me. Hi. 540 00:16:32,556 --> 00:16:34,297 That thing you paid $40 for, it's ours. 541 00:16:34,471 --> 00:16:35,732 You guys smoke weed? 542 00:16:35,907 --> 00:16:38,735 No, the chinchilla you paid $40 for. 543 00:16:38,909 --> 00:16:40,346 What? No, no, no. 544 00:16:40,520 --> 00:16:41,956 That's gonna be a present for my landlord. 545 00:16:42,130 --> 00:16:43,784 I'm a little short on rent this month. 546 00:16:43,959 --> 00:16:45,438 Why didn't you give him the $40? 547 00:16:45,613 --> 00:16:47,309 Hey, you're a smart kid. 548 00:16:47,484 --> 00:16:49,485 Where were you five minutes ago? Over there. 549 00:16:49,659 --> 00:16:51,749 Sorry, buddy, but the chinchilla already belongs 550 00:16:51,923 --> 00:16:53,794 to Miss Labonz's fourth-grade class. 551 00:16:53,969 --> 00:16:55,144 [sighs] 552 00:16:55,317 --> 00:16:57,058 I guess I have to do the right thing. 553 00:16:57,232 --> 00:16:58,625 You have 40 bucks? 554 00:16:58,799 --> 00:17:00,889 We can write you a check. Do you have a check? 555 00:17:01,062 --> 00:17:01,802 I do. 556 00:17:01,976 --> 00:17:03,152 Uh-oh. What? 557 00:17:03,326 --> 00:17:05,153 Okay, if you were a chinchilla, 558 00:17:05,327 --> 00:17:07,503 and you were a rascally little son of a bitch 559 00:17:07,678 --> 00:17:09,767 that wouldn't stay in a box, where would you be? 560 00:17:09,941 --> 00:17:10,898 No! Damn it! 561 00:17:11,073 --> 00:17:12,161 Here, Shinobu.Here, thingy. 562 00:17:12,335 --> 00:17:13,902 Atlas, Atlas.Here, thingy, thingy. 563 00:17:14,076 --> 00:17:15,250 Javier. Shinobu. 564 00:17:15,424 --> 00:17:17,165 Where are you?Oh, wait, is that him? 565 00:17:17,339 --> 00:17:18,863 Or is that a loose furry skate? 566 00:17:19,038 --> 00:17:20,821 Ah! He's gonna get killed out there! 567 00:17:20,996 --> 00:17:21,823 Look out, coming through! 568 00:17:21,997 --> 00:17:23,128 Move it, people, move it! 569 00:17:28,655 --> 00:17:29,917 [whip cracks]Huh? 570 00:17:30,092 --> 00:17:30,832 ANNOUNCER: You know what that means. 571 00:17:31,006 --> 00:17:33,269 Time for The Whip! 572 00:17:33,442 --> 00:17:34,401 [whip cracks] 573 00:17:42,496 --> 00:17:43,278 [gasps] 574 00:17:46,152 --> 00:17:47,674 Hang on, Shinobu! 575 00:17:52,157 --> 00:17:53,507 I'll protect you, Atlas! 576 00:17:56,509 --> 00:17:57,336 You okay? 577 00:17:57,510 --> 00:17:58,337 I'm okay. 578 00:17:58,511 --> 00:17:59,469 [vomits] 579 00:17:59,643 --> 00:18:01,079 [groans] 580 00:18:01,253 --> 00:18:02,516 Let's get out of here, quick. Go, go, go! 581 00:18:02,690 --> 00:18:05,258 Uh-oh, we have a vomit situation. 582 00:18:05,432 --> 00:18:08,782 Look out, skaters, the floor gets slippery when wet. 583 00:18:08,957 --> 00:18:09,696 [gasps] 584 00:18:09,871 --> 00:18:11,176 Vanessa! [thud] 585 00:18:11,351 --> 00:18:12,047 No! 586 00:18:12,221 --> 00:18:13,788 VANESSA: Oh, gross! 587 00:18:13,961 --> 00:18:14,832 Oh, God. 588 00:18:15,006 --> 00:18:16,573 I like her less now. 589 00:18:16,747 --> 00:18:18,053 TINA: Please let Mom and Dad not be home. 590 00:18:18,227 --> 00:18:19,402 Please let Mom and Dad not be home. 591 00:18:19,576 --> 00:18:20,708 Please let Mom and Dad not be home. 592 00:18:20,882 --> 00:18:22,317 Mom? Dad? 593 00:18:22,491 --> 00:18:23,840 Oh, thank God, they're not home. 594 00:18:24,015 --> 00:18:25,059 Well, Wayne, we did it. 595 00:18:25,233 --> 00:18:26,365 Yeah, we did. 596 00:18:26,539 --> 00:18:28,063 You were great out there on the rink. 597 00:18:28,237 --> 00:18:29,717 You came through, big-time. You, too. 598 00:18:29,891 --> 00:18:31,893 So I'll hold Atlas while you go collect his things. 599 00:18:32,067 --> 00:18:34,590 Oh, my God, after all we just went through to get him back, 600 00:18:34,765 --> 00:18:35,766 you're still acting like this? 601 00:18:35,940 --> 00:18:37,115 You still want to take him home? 602 00:18:37,289 --> 00:18:38,855 Don't forget his water bottle. 603 00:18:39,029 --> 00:18:40,728 And, hurry, 'cause if he's gonna get a story tonight, 604 00:18:40,902 --> 00:18:42,208 I have to get him home soon. 605 00:18:42,382 --> 00:18:44,035 You know what, why don't we just let him choose 606 00:18:44,210 --> 00:18:45,515 who he wants to stay with? [scoffs] 607 00:18:45,689 --> 00:18:47,909 I've cared for him every weekend for a year, 608 00:18:48,083 --> 00:18:49,866 so I think I know who he's gonna pick. 609 00:18:50,040 --> 00:18:51,086 Perfect. 610 00:18:51,259 --> 00:18:52,740 You stand there, I'll stand here. 611 00:18:52,913 --> 00:18:54,480 Put him down in the middle, Tina. 612 00:18:54,654 --> 00:18:55,916 Okay. Come to Wayne, Atlas. Come here. 613 00:18:56,090 --> 00:18:57,092 Shinobu. [kissing]Come on, come to Wayne. 614 00:18:57,266 --> 00:18:58,701 Come here, baby. 615 00:18:58,875 --> 00:18:59,789 Come on, Atlas. Atlas. 616 00:18:59,963 --> 00:19:01,401 Over here, come, come, come. 617 00:19:03,010 --> 00:19:03,837 Ah, yes! 618 00:19:04,011 --> 00:19:05,186 Take that, Wayne. 619 00:19:05,361 --> 00:19:06,884 He loves me, not you. 620 00:19:07,057 --> 00:19:08,798 He's sick of your boring rules! 621 00:19:08,972 --> 00:19:11,061 Okay, he's made his choice. 622 00:19:11,237 --> 00:19:12,628 Well, I guess I'll get going. 623 00:19:12,803 --> 00:19:14,587 Uh... have a good weekend. 624 00:19:14,761 --> 00:19:16,938 Uh, don't you want to say good-bye to Shinobu? 625 00:19:17,112 --> 00:19:20,159 Oh, no, I'll... I'll see you Monday. 626 00:19:20,333 --> 00:19:22,900 That didn't feel as great as I thought it would. 627 00:19:23,074 --> 00:19:25,032 I mean, it still feels great, 628 00:19:25,207 --> 00:19:26,512 but just not as great. 629 00:19:26,686 --> 00:19:28,428 My theory is that Wayne is really sad 630 00:19:28,602 --> 00:19:30,733 because you made him think the chinchilla doesn't love him. 631 00:19:30,907 --> 00:19:32,648 Why don't we all go get in bed really fast, 632 00:19:32,823 --> 00:19:35,304 and think about whether Gene is right. Go, go, go! 633 00:19:35,478 --> 00:19:37,306 Hi. Why did some kid just run out of here crying? 634 00:19:37,480 --> 00:19:39,439 There's always kids running out of here crying. 635 00:19:39,613 --> 00:19:41,615 What are you still doing up?Oh, hi, Mom. Hi, Dad. 636 00:19:41,788 --> 00:19:42,833 We weren't out or anything. 637 00:19:43,007 --> 00:19:44,443 We were home all night.Okay. 638 00:19:44,617 --> 00:19:46,009 You saying that makes me think you maybe... 639 00:19:46,184 --> 00:19:47,142 Hey, you know what, this one's on me. 640 00:19:47,316 --> 00:19:48,448 You don't even have to pay me. 641 00:19:48,622 --> 00:19:49,665 High school party? What? [chuckles] 642 00:19:49,839 --> 00:19:50,840 W-Wait, hold on a second. 643 00:19:51,015 --> 00:19:52,146 What's wrong with Louise? 644 00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:53,800 Louise, honey, you okay? 645 00:19:53,974 --> 00:19:56,499 I think I need a ride somewhere. 646 00:19:56,673 --> 00:19:57,805 Mm... no. 647 00:19:57,979 --> 00:19:59,240 What are you doing here? 648 00:19:59,414 --> 00:20:01,287 Hey, so after you left, 649 00:20:01,461 --> 00:20:03,984 Shinobu seemed real down and kind of off. 650 00:20:04,159 --> 00:20:05,987 He wasn't sneezing or anything, 651 00:20:06,161 --> 00:20:07,596 like, not a single seizure. 652 00:20:07,770 --> 00:20:08,945 Really? Oh. 653 00:20:09,119 --> 00:20:10,817 Anyway, I guess maybe he missed you. 654 00:20:10,991 --> 00:20:12,515 He did?I just don't think 655 00:20:12,689 --> 00:20:14,473 he's gonna be happy at our place. 656 00:20:14,647 --> 00:20:16,605 Plus, my dad's simple and doesn't know his own strength. 657 00:20:16,779 --> 00:20:18,304 Oh, I can see that. I mean, your dad 658 00:20:18,478 --> 00:20:19,740 looks like he'd sit on anything. 659 00:20:19,913 --> 00:20:20,740 Oh, he has. 660 00:20:20,914 --> 00:20:22,046 I'm right here. 661 00:20:22,221 --> 00:20:23,178 So you better just take him. 662 00:20:23,352 --> 00:20:25,135 I don't think he even likes me. 663 00:20:25,310 --> 00:20:27,355 [whispers]: Stop it, play along. 664 00:20:27,529 --> 00:20:29,096 Tell me how it goes on Monday, will you? 665 00:20:29,270 --> 00:20:30,358 Okay, thanks, bye. 666 00:20:30,532 --> 00:20:31,969 Bye. 667 00:20:32,143 --> 00:20:34,144 That was nice, Louise. That was really, really sweet. 668 00:20:34,319 --> 00:20:35,930 Ugh, I know. 669 00:20:36,104 --> 00:20:38,279 You know, me and your mom cheated at trivia tonight. 670 00:20:38,453 --> 00:20:39,759 Really? Yup. Impressed? 671 00:20:39,933 --> 00:20:41,587 What's wrong with you? You took her to trivia? 672 00:20:41,761 --> 00:20:44,067 Sounds like you cheated Mom out of a date.There's my girl. 673 00:20:44,242 --> 00:20:45,417 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 674 00:20:45,592 --> 00:20:47,855 LINDA: ♪ Date night tonight ♪ 675 00:20:48,028 --> 00:20:49,943 ♪ Gonna go out, get some food ♪ 676 00:20:50,117 --> 00:20:52,903 ♪ Have a few drinks, forget we have kids for a little bit ♪ 677 00:20:53,076 --> 00:20:55,036 ♪ La, yeah ♪ 678 00:20:55,210 --> 00:20:57,298 ♪ Date night tonight, yeah ♪ 679 00:20:57,472 --> 00:20:59,605 ♪ Gonna go out, get some food ♪ 680 00:20:59,779 --> 00:21:03,653 ♪ Have a few drinks, forget we have kids for a little bit ♪ 681 00:21:07,048 --> 00:21:09,355 ♪ Gonna go out, get some food ♪ 682 00:21:09,528 --> 00:21:11,835 ♪ Have a few drinks, forget we have kids for a little bit ♪ 683 00:21:12,009 --> 00:21:12,880 ♪ La, yeah ♪ 684 00:21:13,054 --> 00:21:14,490 ♪ It's just what we do ♪ 685 00:21:14,663 --> 00:21:17,057 ♪ Date night, date night, date night ♪ 686 00:21:17,231 --> 00:21:18,798 ♪ Gonna go out... ♪