1 00:00:19,454 --> 00:00:21,021 Got to read, got to read, got to read, 2 00:00:21,195 --> 00:00:22,326 got to read, got to read, got to read, 3 00:00:22,500 --> 00:00:23,675 got to read, got to read. 4 00:00:23,849 --> 00:00:25,634 Wow, I feel the exact opposite way. 5 00:00:25,807 --> 00:00:26,983 Why are you saying that? 6 00:00:27,157 --> 00:00:28,811 Book report. I wrote the due date 7 00:00:28,984 --> 00:00:30,420 on my arm so I would remember, then every day since then, 8 00:00:30,594 --> 00:00:31,640 I've taken a shower like an idiot. 9 00:00:31,814 --> 00:00:32,857 When's it due?Tomorrow! 10 00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:34,250 Ah!What page are you on? 11 00:00:34,424 --> 00:00:35,774 The cover![screaming] 12 00:00:35,948 --> 00:00:37,646 Call of the Wild. 13 00:00:37,820 --> 00:00:39,473 Is it about an insane telemarketer? 14 00:00:39,648 --> 00:00:41,518 Or Gene in the bathroom?I don't know yet. 15 00:00:41,692 --> 00:00:42,999 Hey, kids. 16 00:00:43,173 --> 00:00:44,566 Oh, Bob, this package came for you earlier 17 00:00:44,740 --> 00:00:45,914 when you were putting out that grease fire. 18 00:00:46,088 --> 00:00:47,481 See, that's why I hate school. 19 00:00:47,655 --> 00:00:49,136 We miss all the grease fires. 20 00:00:49,310 --> 00:00:50,572 Huh, I wasn't expecting anything. 21 00:00:50,746 --> 00:00:51,963 Oh. Oh, yeah. 22 00:00:52,139 --> 00:00:53,966 I-I remember ordering this. 23 00:00:54,140 --> 00:00:55,445 What the hell is that? 24 00:00:55,619 --> 00:00:57,057 I bought a remote control version 25 00:00:57,231 --> 00:00:59,362 of the helicopter from the movie True Lies, 26 00:00:59,536 --> 00:01:01,017 complete with a clutching Arnold Schwarzenegger 27 00:01:01,191 --> 00:01:03,454 and dangling Jamie Lee Curtis. 28 00:01:03,628 --> 00:01:04,673 Hmm. Huh. Hmm. 29 00:01:04,846 --> 00:01:05,847 Huh.What a beaut. 30 00:01:06,022 --> 00:01:07,676 Were you drunk shopping?No. 31 00:01:07,849 --> 00:01:09,504 I call it "nighttime shopping, 32 00:01:09,677 --> 00:01:10,983 with wine." 33 00:01:11,158 --> 00:01:13,463 I bid on an auction and, uh, yeah, helicopter. 34 00:01:13,638 --> 00:01:14,986 Mm-hmm. 35 00:01:15,162 --> 00:01:17,512 Fly, you bastard, fly! 36 00:01:17,686 --> 00:01:19,079 Hold on, Jamie Lee, I gotcha. 37 00:01:19,253 --> 00:01:21,385 I'll save you from Tia Carrere, I think. 38 00:01:21,558 --> 00:01:22,734 I forget the scene. 39 00:01:22,908 --> 00:01:23,995 Hey, when does Mama get a turn? 40 00:01:24,170 --> 00:01:25,171 I want to save Jamie Lee. 41 00:01:25,346 --> 00:01:26,521 Lin, I just started. 42 00:01:26,694 --> 00:01:27,870 And I think I'm really good at this. 43 00:01:28,043 --> 00:01:29,524 This could be, like, my new thing. 44 00:01:29,698 --> 00:01:32,003 Dad, you don't want to be, like, too cool. 45 00:01:33,222 --> 00:01:34,180 Hello, boots. 46 00:01:34,354 --> 00:01:35,704 Hanging like you do every day. 47 00:01:35,878 --> 00:01:37,227 Give it. Geez, Lin. 48 00:01:37,401 --> 00:01:38,968 All right, let me just bring it in for a landing. 49 00:01:40,709 --> 00:01:42,667 You can't pull off that look, buddy. 50 00:01:42,841 --> 00:01:43,799 It's not you. 51 00:01:43,972 --> 00:01:46,192 Gentle, gentle, and... 52 00:01:46,366 --> 00:01:48,412 kiss the ground. 53 00:01:48,585 --> 00:01:49,847 [all groan]What the hell? 54 00:01:50,021 --> 00:01:51,807 How did that happen? I landed it perfectly. 55 00:01:51,980 --> 00:01:54,200 [squeaking] 56 00:01:54,984 --> 00:01:56,680 [humming] 57 00:01:56,854 --> 00:01:58,770 T-T-Ti... 58 00:01:58,944 --> 00:02:00,597 Well, it had a good run-- of one. 59 00:02:00,772 --> 00:02:03,253 That thing is a piece of crap. I'm getting my money back. 60 00:02:03,427 --> 00:02:04,862 T-Ti-Tina... 61 00:02:05,037 --> 00:02:05,864 Well, maybe it's okay. See? 62 00:02:06,037 --> 00:02:07,388 Oh, no, it's dead. 63 00:02:07,561 --> 00:02:09,737 Squi-Squi-Squirrel.♪ I'm reading ♪ 64 00:02:09,912 --> 00:02:11,435 ♪ I'm reading ♪BOB: Oh, Tina. 65 00:02:11,609 --> 00:02:12,522 Tina! Tina! 66 00:02:12,697 --> 00:02:13,872 [grunts]Ah. Thanks, Dad. 67 00:02:14,045 --> 00:02:15,743 I hate getting hit on the head by boots. 68 00:02:15,918 --> 00:02:18,224 Uh, you're welcome, Tina. Should we throw them back up? 69 00:02:18,399 --> 00:02:19,443 I kind of feel bad. 70 00:02:19,616 --> 00:02:20,923 They've been there for so long. 71 00:02:21,097 --> 00:02:23,752 [grunts] Look out, Tina! 72 00:02:25,406 --> 00:02:26,929 I just... froze. 73 00:02:27,103 --> 00:02:28,931 "And following a skillful landing, 74 00:02:29,104 --> 00:02:30,627 "it broke into a million pieces. 75 00:02:30,801 --> 00:02:34,937 Please issue me a full refund of $45 plus shipping." 76 00:02:35,110 --> 00:02:37,722 And send.That thing was 45 bucks? 77 00:02:37,896 --> 00:02:39,070 Plus shipping. Which was... 78 00:02:39,246 --> 00:02:40,942 also 45 bucks.The hell? 79 00:02:41,116 --> 00:02:42,292 Ugh! What's wrong with me? 80 00:02:42,466 --> 00:02:43,989 I just watched everything happen! 81 00:02:44,163 --> 00:02:46,905 The squirrel, the boots! And I did nothing! 82 00:02:47,079 --> 00:02:48,776 [altering voice]: Hey, let's all be quiet so Tina can read. 83 00:02:48,950 --> 00:02:50,647 [normally]: Who said that? Face it. 84 00:02:50,822 --> 00:02:53,128 I'm not heroic like Arnold Schwarzenegger in True Lies! 85 00:02:53,302 --> 00:02:55,436 I'm not even Tom Arnold in True Lies! 86 00:02:55,610 --> 00:02:57,133 Or even in Roseanne! 87 00:02:57,307 --> 00:02:58,481 Come on, Gene. Don't worry about it. 88 00:02:58,656 --> 00:03:00,004 That was just part of being a dad. 89 00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:01,616 You'll have those instincts someday. 90 00:03:01,789 --> 00:03:03,661 But what if I never get those instincts? 91 00:03:03,835 --> 00:03:06,968 Maybe I'll just grow up to be a very handsome coward! 92 00:03:07,143 --> 00:03:08,752 Dad, you saved Tina! 93 00:03:08,926 --> 00:03:11,495 You're a heroic man of action. I can learn from you. 94 00:03:11,669 --> 00:03:13,801 Gene, I-I think you're blowing this out of proportion. 95 00:03:13,975 --> 00:03:16,805 Though I did react with a certain amount of grace 96 00:03:16,978 --> 00:03:18,675 under pressure. What the hell?![computer chimes] 97 00:03:18,849 --> 00:03:20,808 "Sorry, I don't give refunds for crash landings"?! 98 00:03:20,983 --> 00:03:23,158 "Heliflopter"?! All right, new plan. 99 00:03:23,332 --> 00:03:25,987 His number's on the Web site. I'm calling this guy. 100 00:03:26,162 --> 00:03:28,076 He's doing it! He's man-of-actioning. 101 00:03:28,251 --> 00:03:30,340 Which I call "mactioning." 102 00:03:30,514 --> 00:03:32,473 Hello? Is this Sheldon Felds? This is Bob. 103 00:03:32,646 --> 00:03:34,430 GENE: That's it, Dad. Give it to him. 104 00:03:34,604 --> 00:03:37,521 No, not Bob the crash-lander. It kissed the ground, Sheldon. 105 00:03:37,694 --> 00:03:39,522 Kissed it. Maybe I should've just bought it 106 00:03:39,697 --> 00:03:41,786 from The Hobby Hole-- a realstore. 107 00:03:41,960 --> 00:03:43,223 Hobby Hole! 108 00:03:43,396 --> 00:03:44,527 Well, how about I just come on down 109 00:03:44,701 --> 00:03:46,355 and demand my money back? Yeah, 110 00:03:46,530 --> 00:03:47,966 your address is right on the package. 111 00:03:48,139 --> 00:03:49,402 So see you soon, Sheldon! 112 00:03:49,576 --> 00:03:52,187 Oh, and, also, your handwriting is... 113 00:03:52,361 --> 00:03:55,016 not very good!Nice one, Dad. 114 00:03:55,191 --> 00:03:57,324 Bob, don't you think maybe you should just let this go? 115 00:03:57,497 --> 00:03:59,413 You know how you get. You start saying 116 00:03:59,586 --> 00:04:01,022 "It's the principle" over and over.It's the principle of it, Lin, 117 00:04:01,197 --> 00:04:02,633 the principle.Yep, there it is. 118 00:04:02,806 --> 00:04:04,068 Wait, how did you know I was gonna say that? 119 00:04:04,243 --> 00:04:06,201 I've never said that.Right. Yeah. Right. 120 00:04:06,376 --> 00:04:08,377 It's the principle of the thing, sir. 121 00:04:08,551 --> 00:04:09,378 It's the principle! 122 00:04:09,552 --> 00:04:10,728 Prin... ci... ple! 123 00:04:10,901 --> 00:04:12,425 Oh, well, it is the principle. 124 00:04:12,599 --> 00:04:14,688 And someone's got to stand up for what's right! 125 00:04:14,862 --> 00:04:16,386 Things are pretty loud, so I'm just gonna put 126 00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:18,692 my fingers in my ears. Whoa, that's waxy! 127 00:04:18,867 --> 00:04:19,911 Am I shouting?! 128 00:04:20,084 --> 00:04:21,261 I'm going over there.[sighs] 129 00:04:21,435 --> 00:04:22,870 I'm going, too!No, you're not, Gene. 130 00:04:23,045 --> 00:04:23,959 It's a school night. 131 00:04:24,132 --> 00:04:25,699 This is my school now, Mom, 132 00:04:25,874 --> 00:04:27,266 the School of Hard Dads! 133 00:04:27,440 --> 00:04:29,529 So just call me Li'l Hard Dad!Yeah! 134 00:04:29,704 --> 00:04:32,053 But, no, not that. But, yes, he should come! 135 00:04:32,228 --> 00:04:34,055 If Gene wants to learn to be a man of action, 136 00:04:34,230 --> 00:04:35,536 this is taking action! 137 00:04:35,709 --> 00:04:37,058 Okay.Bye. 138 00:04:37,233 --> 00:04:38,887 Come on, Gene. Let's go get our refund! 139 00:04:39,060 --> 00:04:40,409 Refund road trip! 140 00:04:40,584 --> 00:04:42,237 I forgot my keys! 141 00:04:42,411 --> 00:04:44,196 Yeah, he did! Deal with it! 142 00:04:44,370 --> 00:04:46,329 Deal with it!Yeah! 143 00:04:50,245 --> 00:04:53,771 Look at us, just a boy and his dad, driving to get a refund. 144 00:04:53,944 --> 00:04:56,252 Ooh, I got chills just saying it.Well, Gene, it's... 145 00:04:56,425 --> 00:04:58,079 Wait, wait, wait, wait! Don't talk yet. 146 00:04:58,254 --> 00:05:00,778 I want to sample what you say and play it over and over 147 00:05:00,951 --> 00:05:02,432 until I've got heroic instincts 148 00:05:02,605 --> 00:05:04,694 coming out of every orifice of my body. 149 00:05:04,869 --> 00:05:07,567 Okay. Uh, it's not about being a hero, Gene. 150 00:05:07,742 --> 00:05:09,396 It's about doing what's right. 151 00:05:09,569 --> 00:05:10,613 Papa, do preach! 152 00:05:10,788 --> 00:05:12,180 And it is our duty, 153 00:05:12,355 --> 00:05:14,923 to mankind, really, to fight for justice. 154 00:05:15,096 --> 00:05:17,055 Some people say you have to learn to let things go. 155 00:05:17,228 --> 00:05:19,230 Well, you know what happens when you let things go? 156 00:05:19,406 --> 00:05:20,754 What?! What happens?! 157 00:05:20,928 --> 00:05:22,625 You drop the thing you're holding, Gene. 158 00:05:22,800 --> 00:05:24,584 And the thing I'm holding in this situation 159 00:05:24,759 --> 00:05:25,934 is this bag of crap! 160 00:05:26,108 --> 00:05:27,326 Nice! Listen to this. 161 00:05:27,500 --> 00:05:28,893 BOB: It's about doing what's right. 162 00:05:29,067 --> 00:05:31,112 [fart sound effect]Wow, I sound important. 163 00:05:31,286 --> 00:05:33,637 Powerful. Maybe take out the fart noise? 164 00:05:33,810 --> 00:05:35,769 No. It kind of makes you go, like, "Huh, good point," 165 00:05:35,944 --> 00:05:37,946 and also, "Good fart." 166 00:05:39,250 --> 00:05:40,904 Mom, Mom, look what I drew. 167 00:05:41,079 --> 00:05:42,298 It's me when I'm grown up 168 00:05:42,471 --> 00:05:43,951 eating tacos with my monkey Sheila. 169 00:05:44,125 --> 00:05:45,519 Great, honey.Yeah. 170 00:05:45,692 --> 00:05:47,302 How's the reading coming, Tina?Oh, good. 171 00:05:47,476 --> 00:05:49,305 Really, really, really good.Good. 172 00:05:49,478 --> 00:05:51,307 Okay, fine! It's going terrible! I'm a slow reader! 173 00:05:51,480 --> 00:05:53,004 And then I get to a comma and I'm like, "Oh, I guess 174 00:05:53,177 --> 00:05:54,918 "they want me to pause, but for how long? How do I know 175 00:05:55,093 --> 00:05:57,095 when to stop pausing?!" I'm never gonna finish this book! 176 00:05:57,269 --> 00:05:59,358 Whoa.Ah! And I'm gonna have to stand up there with the whole class 177 00:05:59,533 --> 00:06:01,098 staring at me and my armpits are gonna sweat and my boobs are gonna sweat 178 00:06:01,273 --> 00:06:02,927 and all the sweat's gonna meet in the middle 179 00:06:03,100 --> 00:06:04,538 and everyone's gonna know I didn't read the book! 180 00:06:04,711 --> 00:06:06,670 [grunts] Thank you.Tina, Tina, honey, listen. 181 00:06:06,843 --> 00:06:09,324 I'm gonna let you in on a little secret, mm-kay? 182 00:06:09,499 --> 00:06:12,459 I didn't read any of the books I did reports on in school.What? 183 00:06:12,632 --> 00:06:14,024 Oh, yeah, I've never read the book. 184 00:06:14,199 --> 00:06:15,678 Louise!What? You never read the book. 185 00:06:15,853 --> 00:06:17,680 Well, I mean, you should read the book. 186 00:06:17,855 --> 00:06:20,509 It's-it's better to read the book. We never read the book. 187 00:06:20,684 --> 00:06:22,685 How can you do a book report if you haven't read the book? 188 00:06:22,860 --> 00:06:24,644 You just got to give 'em a little show. Pizzazz 'em 189 00:06:24,819 --> 00:06:26,821 so they don't even notice that you didn't you-know-what. 190 00:06:26,995 --> 00:06:28,562 Pizzazz-- that's up my alley. 191 00:06:28,735 --> 00:06:30,694 I once did a presentation on Catcher in the Rye 192 00:06:30,867 --> 00:06:33,000 with only a catcher's mask and a loaf of rye bread. 193 00:06:33,175 --> 00:06:35,132 Now, that one I failed, 'cause I didn't back-cover it. 194 00:06:35,307 --> 00:06:37,526 Back-cover it?Oh, my God, Mom, Let me slap her again. 195 00:06:37,701 --> 00:06:39,747 No, it's okay. Don't slap her again. 196 00:06:39,920 --> 00:06:42,706 Tina's learning. See, Tina, you can't judge a book by its cover, 197 00:06:42,879 --> 00:06:46,014 but you canjudge it by its back cover. Mm-hmm. 198 00:06:46,187 --> 00:06:47,668 Uh-huh... Wait, I don't get it. 199 00:06:47,841 --> 00:06:49,146 All right, let me see. Let me see here. 200 00:06:49,321 --> 00:06:51,235 Dog named Buck, stolen from his home, 201 00:06:51,411 --> 00:06:52,716 forced to live as a sled dog 202 00:06:52,889 --> 00:06:54,500 in the cold unforgiving Klondike region. 203 00:06:54,675 --> 00:06:56,372 Oh, my gosh, I'm getting so many ideas already! 204 00:06:56,545 --> 00:06:58,678 Musical numbers, choreography...Musical numbers? 205 00:06:58,853 --> 00:07:00,680 Louise, you're on props and costumes! 206 00:07:00,855 --> 00:07:02,204 I'm on lyrics and dance steps! 207 00:07:02,377 --> 00:07:04,511 Tina, go wash your face! We got a show to do! 208 00:07:05,728 --> 00:07:07,600 S. Felds. This is it. 209 00:07:07,774 --> 00:07:09,646 Let's give him hell![over intercom]: Hello? 210 00:07:09,819 --> 00:07:11,430 Sheldon? It's Bob.Go away. 211 00:07:11,605 --> 00:07:13,040 Okay, bye.No, Gene, come back. 212 00:07:13,214 --> 00:07:14,956 Right, right. Li'l Hard Dad. 213 00:07:15,129 --> 00:07:17,480 We're not leaving, Sheldon. Not until we get our money back 214 00:07:17,653 --> 00:07:19,221 for this defective helicopter! 215 00:07:19,394 --> 00:07:21,571 So do the right thing and give us a refund. 216 00:07:21,745 --> 00:07:24,399 Well put. Yep.You don't get it, do you, Bob? 217 00:07:24,574 --> 00:07:27,055 Sheldon Felds doesn't give refunds to heliflopters 218 00:07:27,228 --> 00:07:29,187 who crash on their first flight. 219 00:07:29,360 --> 00:07:30,884 Stop calling me a heliflopter! 220 00:07:31,059 --> 00:07:33,191 We don't care how fun it is to say! 221 00:07:33,365 --> 00:07:36,106 You see, I only sell those novelty toys to make ends meet. 222 00:07:36,281 --> 00:07:40,197 My real passion is customizing serious RC choppers. 223 00:07:40,372 --> 00:07:41,156 Well, what is that? 224 00:07:41,329 --> 00:07:42,939 This is my quad. 225 00:07:43,113 --> 00:07:45,682 I've made a few modifications for poking purposes. 226 00:07:45,855 --> 00:07:47,423 [scoffs] That's dumb. Poke! 227 00:07:47,596 --> 00:07:48,990 Hey! Ah!Tickle, tickle. 228 00:07:49,163 --> 00:07:51,774 Tap, tap. Missed me!Stop-stop that. Ah! Ah! 229 00:07:51,949 --> 00:07:53,560 Hey, there's something on your shirt.What? 230 00:07:53,733 --> 00:07:55,387 Oop, got your nose!Quit it! Ah! 231 00:07:55,562 --> 00:07:57,911 So, shall I continue to masterfully poke you, 232 00:07:58,086 --> 00:07:59,696 or do you want to run along home? 233 00:07:59,870 --> 00:08:01,437 The latter! Good day, sir! 234 00:08:01,610 --> 00:08:04,221 No, we're not going anywhere.Okay, then! 235 00:08:04,396 --> 00:08:05,440 Suit yourself, Bob! 236 00:08:05,615 --> 00:08:06,790 Wet Willy!Ah! 237 00:08:06,963 --> 00:08:08,052 How is that wet?! 238 00:08:08,225 --> 00:08:09,923 LINDA: Oh, she looks great. 239 00:08:10,098 --> 00:08:11,882 You look great, hon.Maybe the best she's ever looked. 240 00:08:12,055 --> 00:08:13,274 Give us a twirl. See that tail? 241 00:08:13,449 --> 00:08:14,711 Real construction paper. 242 00:08:14,884 --> 00:08:15,930 Stunning.Thank you. 243 00:08:16,103 --> 00:08:17,148 Wag it a little honey, will you? 244 00:08:17,322 --> 00:08:18,235 [grunting]Wag it, wag it. 245 00:08:18,410 --> 00:08:19,324 Shake it, shake it. 246 00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:21,238 That a girl. All right, 247 00:08:21,413 --> 00:08:24,112 so let the Call of the Wild book report rehearsal begin! 248 00:08:24,286 --> 00:08:25,678 Tina, here's the lyrics for the opening number. 249 00:08:25,853 --> 00:08:27,418 Go ahead and sing it! Go on, girl. 250 00:08:27,593 --> 00:08:29,290 Okay. Ring, ring. 251 00:08:29,464 --> 00:08:31,293 [weakly]: ♪ Who's this calling on the phone? ♪ 252 00:08:31,466 --> 00:08:33,947 ♪ It's the Wild, is anybody home? ♪ 253 00:08:34,121 --> 00:08:36,645 Great lyrics, Mom.I know. But you got to belt it, honey. 254 00:08:36,820 --> 00:08:39,256 Let your voice do the reading that your eyes didn't do. 255 00:08:39,431 --> 00:08:40,606 That makes total sense. 256 00:08:40,780 --> 00:08:42,477 Uh-huh. So can you do it with vibrato? 257 00:08:42,652 --> 00:08:45,307 Like this? ♪ Wild, wild! ♪ 258 00:08:45,480 --> 00:08:47,701 [flat]: ♪ Wild... ♪ 259 00:08:47,875 --> 00:08:49,441 No, that's n... Okay. You know what, try grabbing 260 00:08:49,615 --> 00:08:50,965 the skin on your throat and moving it around 261 00:08:51,139 --> 00:08:52,662 while you sing like this. ♪ Na... ♪ 262 00:08:52,836 --> 00:08:54,620 Like this? ♪ Uh... ♪ No. 263 00:08:54,794 --> 00:08:56,447 Let me try, let me try. [vibrating sounds][coughing] 264 00:08:56,623 --> 00:08:58,275 Gentle! Gentle! 265 00:08:58,450 --> 00:09:00,495 Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. 266 00:09:00,669 --> 00:09:02,672 [groans] Maybe I should just transfer to St. Mathews. 267 00:09:02,846 --> 00:09:05,153 What? You think those nuns won't make you do book reports? 268 00:09:05,326 --> 00:09:06,980 People never stop making you read books, Tina. 269 00:09:07,154 --> 00:09:08,548 It's a sick world! 270 00:09:08,721 --> 00:09:10,549 You got to learn how to faux-dazzle it. Trust me. 271 00:09:10,724 --> 00:09:12,942 After tonight, you won't ever have to read a book again. 272 00:09:13,116 --> 00:09:14,640 I love you, Mom. 273 00:09:14,815 --> 00:09:16,947 BOB: So, Gene, I know it seems like we're hiding 274 00:09:17,120 --> 00:09:19,123 from Sheldon's helicopter in a Dumpster... 275 00:09:19,297 --> 00:09:21,298 GENE: Very much so....but we're actually 276 00:09:21,472 --> 00:09:22,996 just r-regrouping. 277 00:09:23,171 --> 00:09:25,913 And now I will calmly check outside... 278 00:09:26,826 --> 00:09:28,306 Oh, thank God. It's gone. 279 00:09:28,480 --> 00:09:30,221 I mean, regroup over. Uh, we can get out now. 280 00:09:30,394 --> 00:09:32,701 We don't have to get out on my account. I'm in my element. 281 00:09:32,875 --> 00:09:35,575 No, we are going to show Sheldon that we're still here 282 00:09:35,749 --> 00:09:38,316 and we'll never give up! Whoa. Whoa. What's that? 283 00:09:38,490 --> 00:09:40,971 Fish in the sky! This was in Revelations! 284 00:09:41,144 --> 00:09:42,320 Kirk Cameron was right! 285 00:09:42,494 --> 00:09:44,584 You done hiding, Bob?! 286 00:09:44,758 --> 00:09:47,412 We're not hiding, Sheldon! We were regrouping! 287 00:09:47,586 --> 00:09:49,066 And we still want our refund! 288 00:09:49,240 --> 00:09:51,373 Uh-huh. Swim, my pets. Swim! [chuckles] 289 00:09:51,547 --> 00:09:54,375 Your gently floating fish don't scare me, Sheldon! 290 00:09:54,549 --> 00:09:57,161 They're actually kind of pretty! It's a lot like snorkeling, 291 00:09:57,335 --> 00:10:00,337 which I've never done, but I imagine I would love it! 292 00:10:00,511 --> 00:10:01,644 Ow. Ow. 293 00:10:01,817 --> 00:10:02,731 Dad! 294 00:10:02,905 --> 00:10:04,038 You're shooting BBs at me! 295 00:10:04,211 --> 00:10:05,735 Ow! That one hit me in the nipple! 296 00:10:05,908 --> 00:10:07,041 That's his good nipple! 297 00:10:07,215 --> 00:10:09,043 My good nipple is bleeding! 298 00:10:09,216 --> 00:10:10,347 Are we done here, Bob?! 299 00:10:10,522 --> 00:10:12,350 You lose, I win! Also, 300 00:10:12,524 --> 00:10:14,351 I have a couple frozen pizzas in the oven, 301 00:10:14,525 --> 00:10:15,875 so I'm ready to wrap this up. 302 00:10:16,049 --> 00:10:17,878 No! We're not done!We're not? 303 00:10:18,052 --> 00:10:19,966 No! Two can play the gameAh! 304 00:10:20,140 --> 00:10:22,230 of having a helicopter that shoots stuff, Gene! 305 00:10:22,403 --> 00:10:24,754 Two can play!Wow, you sound really tough, 306 00:10:24,927 --> 00:10:26,234 even though you're holding your nipples. 307 00:10:26,408 --> 00:10:28,192 This is war, Sheldon! 308 00:10:28,365 --> 00:10:30,193 MAN: Welcome to The Hobby Hole. 309 00:10:30,368 --> 00:10:31,717 I'm Terry. How can I help you? 310 00:10:31,892 --> 00:10:33,240 Hi, uh, weird question. 311 00:10:33,414 --> 00:10:35,373 Do you by any chance have any RC helicopters 312 00:10:35,547 --> 00:10:37,245 capable of actual warfare? 313 00:10:37,418 --> 00:10:39,551 Uh, we don't have anything like that, sir. 314 00:10:39,725 --> 00:10:41,292 [whispers]: Follow me. 315 00:10:41,466 --> 00:10:45,121 Welcome to the world of RC helicopter warfare. 316 00:10:45,296 --> 00:10:47,908 BOTH: Whoa.I was hoping that would get a "whoa." 317 00:10:51,172 --> 00:10:54,043 We have to be pretty discreet about our warfare showroom, 318 00:10:54,217 --> 00:10:55,915 as you can imagine, but neat-o, huh? 319 00:10:56,090 --> 00:10:57,091 "Sky-sassin"? 320 00:10:57,264 --> 00:10:58,265 That sounds brutal. 321 00:10:58,440 --> 00:10:59,919 War is brutal. 322 00:11:00,094 --> 00:11:01,442 Of course, we advise you absolutely, 323 00:11:01,616 --> 00:11:02,879 do not aim these at people. 324 00:11:03,052 --> 00:11:04,924 Unless you hate them.Oh. 325 00:11:05,099 --> 00:11:07,971 Now, I need to know what kind of element we're dealing with here. 326 00:11:08,144 --> 00:11:09,972 Well, it's this guy who sold me a helicopter online, 327 00:11:10,147 --> 00:11:11,105 Sheldon Felds... 328 00:11:11,278 --> 00:11:12,453 Oh. What? 329 00:11:12,628 --> 00:11:13,933 Oh, man.What is it, Terry? 330 00:11:14,107 --> 00:11:15,413 Just stay away from Sheldon Felds. 331 00:11:15,586 --> 00:11:16,413 Wait, you know him? 332 00:11:16,587 --> 00:11:17,501 He used to work here. 333 00:11:17,677 --> 00:11:18,981 He was fired. Why? 334 00:11:19,155 --> 00:11:20,984 Let's just say Sheldon ate a lot of food 335 00:11:21,158 --> 00:11:23,899 out of the fridge in the break room that didn't belong to him 336 00:11:24,073 --> 00:11:25,640 and was clearly labeled. 337 00:11:25,815 --> 00:11:27,947 And when me and the rest of the Hobby Hole guys decided 338 00:11:28,121 --> 00:11:30,601 to gently approach him about it, he attacked us with helicopters. 339 00:11:30,777 --> 00:11:31,995 Hmm. You see this? 340 00:11:32,168 --> 00:11:33,822 One of Sheldon's BBs got lodged in there. 341 00:11:33,996 --> 00:11:35,825 And now I no longer feel comfortable wearing shorts. 342 00:11:35,999 --> 00:11:37,260 No! Trust me. 343 00:11:37,434 --> 00:11:38,914 You don't want to go up against Sheldon. 344 00:11:39,088 --> 00:11:40,787 Well, I am going up against Sheldon. 345 00:11:40,961 --> 00:11:42,265 He's on a whole other level! 346 00:11:42,440 --> 00:11:44,442 But I've got rightness on my side. 347 00:11:44,615 --> 00:11:46,182 Oh, you've got rightness on your side. 348 00:11:46,356 --> 00:11:48,316 Okay, then you're good.Really? You think so? 349 00:11:48,490 --> 00:11:50,013 No, but I just realized-- why am I trying to stop you? 350 00:11:50,187 --> 00:11:51,187 I make commission on these. 351 00:11:51,361 --> 00:11:52,494 So let's get you all set up. 352 00:11:52,668 --> 00:11:54,495 Behold the Vanquisher. 353 00:11:54,669 --> 00:11:55,452 Whoa. 354 00:11:55,626 --> 00:11:56,802 Yeah, she's expensive. 355 00:11:56,976 --> 00:11:58,804 How expensive? $300. 356 00:11:58,979 --> 00:12:00,067 That's not much. 357 00:12:00,240 --> 00:12:01,284 But with that missile range, 358 00:12:01,458 --> 00:12:02,330 [chuckles] she's worth it. 359 00:12:02,504 --> 00:12:04,679 $300?! Of money? 360 00:12:04,854 --> 00:12:07,160 It's not about the money, Gene, it's about the principle. 361 00:12:07,335 --> 00:12:08,423 Yeah, it's about the principle. 362 00:12:08,596 --> 00:12:09,466 Terry, please. 363 00:12:09,640 --> 00:12:11,120 Teach me how to fly it. 364 00:12:15,822 --> 00:12:18,041 Huh, it's actually pretty, uh, intuitive. 365 00:12:18,215 --> 00:12:20,652 Yep, I probably don't need to be holding you like this. 366 00:12:20,826 --> 00:12:21,870 No, it helped. 367 00:12:22,044 --> 00:12:23,480 You know, before I let you go, 368 00:12:23,654 --> 00:12:24,874 good luck out there, buddy. Thanks. 369 00:12:25,048 --> 00:12:27,355 Okay, well, thanks for coming in. 370 00:12:27,528 --> 00:12:28,748 LINDA: There you go. 371 00:12:28,922 --> 00:12:30,706 Mama's old tap shoes. How do they feel? 372 00:12:30,879 --> 00:12:33,143 A little loose, but, um, why am I wearing these? 373 00:12:33,317 --> 00:12:35,537 Because nothing's more distracting than tap dancing. 374 00:12:35,711 --> 00:12:36,972 When your toes are tapping, 375 00:12:37,147 --> 00:12:38,365 they think the reading must have happened. 376 00:12:38,539 --> 00:12:39,846 Now, follow me! 377 00:12:40,019 --> 00:12:41,195 And... a tap and a tap and a tap-tap-tap. 378 00:12:41,369 --> 00:12:42,717 And a tap and a tap and a... 379 00:12:42,892 --> 00:12:44,153 And we're tapping and we're spinning 380 00:12:44,327 --> 00:12:45,981 and we're spinning and we're tapping. 381 00:12:46,155 --> 00:12:47,678 Hold on. So when... And a shimmy tap, a shimmy tap. 382 00:12:47,854 --> 00:12:49,158 Wait, hold on. We're still spinning... 383 00:12:49,332 --> 00:12:50,769 A scooby tap, a scooby tap.Scoo-Scooby tap. 384 00:12:50,943 --> 00:12:52,553 A wiggle tap, a jiggle tap.Wait. What? 385 00:12:52,727 --> 00:12:54,556 And a shibba-dabba, shibba-dabba. [panting] 386 00:12:54,730 --> 00:12:56,863 Scooba-dooba-doo, and no one's even looking at you, 387 00:12:57,037 --> 00:12:59,386 what you didn't do, and a-scabba-dooba-scabba-dooba, 388 00:12:59,561 --> 00:13:01,258 scabba-dooba-day.Huh? 389 00:13:01,432 --> 00:13:04,086 And the book report's over, and you got yourself an "A"! 390 00:13:04,260 --> 00:13:07,047 Ah, maybe B-minus, probably, in my experience, you know. 391 00:13:07,221 --> 00:13:08,700 Hey. How's the tappin'? 392 00:13:08,875 --> 00:13:10,267 Great! She's like a jazzy jackhammer. 393 00:13:10,441 --> 00:13:12,008 Watch out, floor!Oh, yeah. 394 00:13:12,182 --> 00:13:13,879 So, I borrowed Teddy's wheelbarrow, 395 00:13:14,053 --> 00:13:16,099 and I made it look like a dogsled, and the only thing is, 396 00:13:16,273 --> 00:13:18,014 he said he wants to be in your book report, 397 00:13:18,187 --> 00:13:20,277 so I told him I'd pull some strings, get him a small part, 398 00:13:20,451 --> 00:13:21,931 and anyway, he's gonna meet you at school tomorrow, 399 00:13:22,105 --> 00:13:23,279 you can work it out then, okay? 400 00:13:23,453 --> 00:13:25,413 Cool? Is that cool?Very cool! 401 00:13:25,586 --> 00:13:27,894 You could tap with a wheelbarrow tied around you, right, hon? 402 00:13:28,067 --> 00:13:29,721 Uh... 403 00:13:30,809 --> 00:13:32,072 Got to get up higher somehow, 404 00:13:32,245 --> 00:13:33,942 so I can see onto his stupid balcony. 405 00:13:34,116 --> 00:13:35,423 Oh! 406 00:13:35,596 --> 00:13:37,250 I'll just climb up on that roof. [laughs] 407 00:13:37,424 --> 00:13:39,078 Uh, sure, that seems like a good idea 408 00:13:39,253 --> 00:13:40,731 of something dangerous to do. 409 00:13:40,907 --> 00:13:42,734 Gene, you stay down there.Yup, no problem. 410 00:13:42,908 --> 00:13:44,605 Ugh! You're back. 411 00:13:44,779 --> 00:13:46,607 Yeah, I'm back, and I'm armed 412 00:13:46,782 --> 00:13:49,044 with righteousness and this! 413 00:13:49,219 --> 00:13:50,611 The Vanquisher. I see. 414 00:13:50,786 --> 00:13:52,221 Yeah, go inside, Sheldon, 415 00:13:52,395 --> 00:13:53,441 to get your checkbook! 416 00:13:53,615 --> 00:13:54,615 Like her? 417 00:13:54,789 --> 00:13:56,486 I call her the Vanquisherer. 418 00:13:56,661 --> 00:13:58,097 I got it from The Hobby Hole. 419 00:13:58,272 --> 00:13:59,620 And then I added the extra "er" 420 00:13:59,794 --> 00:14:01,404 when I customized the crap out of it. 421 00:14:01,578 --> 00:14:03,842 Vanquisherer? That's hard to say. 422 00:14:04,017 --> 00:14:06,279 No, it's not. You just slow down on the second "er." 423 00:14:06,453 --> 00:14:08,020 Vanquisher-rer? 424 00:14:08,195 --> 00:14:10,283 Look, the point is it vanquishes Vanquishers! 425 00:14:10,457 --> 00:14:12,111 Well, not if I vanquish it first! 426 00:14:12,285 --> 00:14:13,982 Are you suggesting an air battle? 427 00:14:14,157 --> 00:14:15,636 Perfect! Air battle! 428 00:14:15,811 --> 00:14:17,639 I'm gonna make your precious helicopter 429 00:14:17,812 --> 00:14:20,206 look like the piece of crap True Liesone you sold me! 430 00:14:20,380 --> 00:14:23,166 But first, can I shoot you with a missile in your nipple? 431 00:14:23,340 --> 00:14:24,514 I was really excited about it. 432 00:14:24,688 --> 00:14:26,648 Let me think. No. Air battle. 433 00:14:26,822 --> 00:14:28,823 All right, fine!On three. One... 434 00:14:28,998 --> 00:14:31,653 Not to interrupt, but is this the best way to solve this? 435 00:14:31,826 --> 00:14:33,133 Just asking. Yes! Yes. 436 00:14:33,307 --> 00:14:35,613 Two.[whirring] 437 00:14:35,787 --> 00:14:37,658 Uh... Three! 438 00:14:37,832 --> 00:14:39,486 I'm taking you down, Sheldon! You're gonna regret 439 00:14:39,661 --> 00:14:42,576 the day you... Oh, my God, you just hit me. That was quick. 440 00:14:42,750 --> 00:14:44,144 Time for the death blow! 441 00:14:44,317 --> 00:14:45,841 Not the death blow! 442 00:14:46,972 --> 00:14:48,495 Huh? What? Terry?! 443 00:14:48,669 --> 00:14:49,845 Me and the Hobby Hole boys thought 444 00:14:50,019 --> 00:14:51,455 you could use a little help. 445 00:14:51,629 --> 00:14:53,153 We did inventory and then we came right over! 446 00:14:53,326 --> 00:14:54,588 Join the battle, brothers! 447 00:14:54,763 --> 00:14:56,547 My favorite things were eating lunch 448 00:14:56,721 --> 00:14:59,549 and wearing shorts, Sheldon, and you took it all away! 449 00:14:59,724 --> 00:15:01,509 Now it's time to pay the price! 450 00:15:01,682 --> 00:15:02,989 I didn't eat your delicious 451 00:15:03,163 --> 00:15:04,642 roast beef and cheddar sandwich, Terry! 452 00:15:04,816 --> 00:15:07,471 But your chopper's gonna eat this! 453 00:15:07,644 --> 00:15:09,125 ["Ride of the Valkyries" plays] 454 00:15:09,298 --> 00:15:10,952 [grunts] 455 00:15:14,347 --> 00:15:15,610 Aah! 456 00:15:16,176 --> 00:15:18,047 Uh... 457 00:15:18,221 --> 00:15:20,179 RC net attack! 458 00:15:20,354 --> 00:15:22,878 Aah!This one's for Jamie Lee! 459 00:15:27,187 --> 00:15:29,405 [yelling] [laughs, whoops] 460 00:15:29,580 --> 00:15:30,885 Whoa! Whoa! 461 00:15:31,059 --> 00:15:31,974 Oh! Oh, my. Whoa! 462 00:15:32,148 --> 00:15:34,368 No! 463 00:15:34,542 --> 00:15:35,846 Dad, you're on a ledge! 464 00:15:36,022 --> 00:15:38,197 Yeah, but we won the air battle!Yeah! 465 00:15:38,371 --> 00:15:40,374 How's Sheldon's expression, Gene? Is he sad? 466 00:15:40,548 --> 00:15:42,898 Is he crying?No, he's eating something, 467 00:15:43,072 --> 00:15:45,900 and he's got a new helicopter, and it's pointing at you. 468 00:15:46,075 --> 00:15:48,337 Ow! And there's a dart in your butt. 469 00:15:51,732 --> 00:15:52,864 Father!Everything's fine, Gene. 470 00:15:53,038 --> 00:15:54,213 I've got everything under control. 471 00:15:54,388 --> 00:15:55,736 Ow!Gotcha! 472 00:15:55,911 --> 00:15:57,216 Are you sure?! Yup. 473 00:15:57,390 --> 00:15:59,131 Ow! My butt! Hoo! 474 00:15:59,306 --> 00:16:01,698 Uh, Bob, should we get you a ladder or something? 475 00:16:01,873 --> 00:16:03,962 No, Terry! Take down Sheldon! 476 00:16:04,136 --> 00:16:05,702 Hobby Hole Boys, give him everything you got! 477 00:16:05,876 --> 00:16:07,182 [war cry] 478 00:16:07,356 --> 00:16:10,707 What? Wait, Dad! What about the ladder?! 479 00:16:10,881 --> 00:16:12,667 That seems like a pretty good idea. 480 00:16:12,841 --> 00:16:15,451 I mean, you're on a ledge, and you've got a butt full of darts! 481 00:16:15,625 --> 00:16:19,413 Yes, but I also have a butt full of... principles! Oh! 482 00:16:19,586 --> 00:16:21,110 So, yeah, you guys defeat Sheldon, 483 00:16:21,283 --> 00:16:23,155 and I'll just work on my upper-body strength, 484 00:16:23,330 --> 00:16:25,941 do some pull-ups, and I'll be out of here in no time. 485 00:16:26,115 --> 00:16:28,856 [straining]: I can't do even one! 486 00:16:29,030 --> 00:16:30,640 You're incredible, Bob. 487 00:16:30,815 --> 00:16:33,121 Time for the... Sky-sassin. 488 00:16:33,296 --> 00:16:34,905 Luckily, I have my Sky-sassin-assin! 489 00:16:35,081 --> 00:16:36,298 I'll go get it. 490 00:16:36,472 --> 00:16:37,778 Well, I'll wait for you. 491 00:16:37,952 --> 00:16:40,302 What is wrong with you hobbyists?! 492 00:16:40,476 --> 00:16:44,003 ♪ Up here in the Klondike, it can get pretty cold ♪ 493 00:16:44,177 --> 00:16:45,743 ♪ The other dogs are looking fierce ♪ 494 00:16:45,917 --> 00:16:47,745 ♪ So it's time to get bold ♪ 495 00:16:47,918 --> 00:16:50,922 ♪ But when life gets tough, well, you just got to smile ♪ 496 00:16:51,096 --> 00:16:52,489 ♪ And better answer that phone ♪ 497 00:16:52,663 --> 00:16:56,754 ♪ 'Cause it's the call of the wild! ♪ 498 00:16:56,927 --> 00:16:58,059 [whoops] Yes! 499 00:16:58,234 --> 00:16:59,495 [whoops]That moved me. 500 00:16:59,669 --> 00:17:00,975 So, yeah, you just do that, 501 00:17:01,149 --> 00:17:02,759 and no one will even know you didn't read it. 502 00:17:02,933 --> 00:17:04,371 Or I could just do it. 503 00:17:04,545 --> 00:17:06,154 Yeah, no, no, you should do it. You should do it. 504 00:17:06,328 --> 00:17:07,765 It's your thing. You do it.Right, right, right. 505 00:17:07,939 --> 00:17:09,897 Uh... [panting] 506 00:17:10,071 --> 00:17:11,377 I can't! I can't do it! 507 00:17:11,551 --> 00:17:12,943 [panting] No, no, no, you'll be fine. 508 00:17:13,118 --> 00:17:14,294 Oh, yeah.You just remember all the steps. 509 00:17:14,468 --> 00:17:15,643 You got those.Memorize all the lyrics. 510 00:17:15,817 --> 00:17:16,991 Done. And don't mess it up. 511 00:17:17,165 --> 00:17:18,340 Boom. [panting] Okay. 512 00:17:18,515 --> 00:17:19,777 I'm-I'm gonna go to bed. 513 00:17:19,951 --> 00:17:21,605 Everything's gonna be fine. 514 00:17:21,778 --> 00:17:23,128 Okay. Good night! 515 00:17:23,303 --> 00:17:24,781 Yeah, get your beauty sleep. 516 00:17:24,955 --> 00:17:26,653 Oh, your wheelbarrow, hon. You might want to... 517 00:17:26,827 --> 00:17:28,089 Ah, she's fine. She's got this. 518 00:17:28,263 --> 00:17:29,613 We did good today, Mom. We did good. 519 00:17:29,787 --> 00:17:30,961 We did. Yeah. 520 00:17:31,136 --> 00:17:32,442 Hey, you want me to teach you 521 00:17:32,615 --> 00:17:34,488 how to get out of a speeding ticket? Yes! 522 00:17:34,662 --> 00:17:36,010 Sky-sassin! 523 00:17:36,184 --> 00:17:37,664 Destroy him, Terry! And I didn't catch 524 00:17:37,838 --> 00:17:40,058 all of your names, but you guys destroy him, too! 525 00:17:40,232 --> 00:17:42,670 Oh, that's Vance, and that's Will. Hi. Hey. 526 00:17:42,844 --> 00:17:44,846 Hey, Dad, remember this? 527 00:17:45,019 --> 00:17:47,718 BOB: Some people say you have to learn to let things go. 528 00:17:47,892 --> 00:17:50,503 I know you don't agree with them, but I'm starting to think 529 00:17:50,677 --> 00:17:52,506 maybe some people are right. 530 00:17:52,680 --> 00:17:54,811 Listen, here it is high-pitched like a little girl. 531 00:17:54,986 --> 00:17:57,250 [high-pitched voice]: Some people say you have to learn to let things go. 532 00:17:57,423 --> 00:17:59,338 Here it is super, super deep, like a monster. 533 00:17:59,512 --> 00:18:01,210 [deep, distorted voice]: You have to learn to let things go. 534 00:18:01,384 --> 00:18:02,603 Here it is with a beat under it.[upbeat tune plays] 535 00:18:02,777 --> 00:18:05,039 You have to learn to let things go. 536 00:18:05,213 --> 00:18:07,694 No matter how I play it back, Keyboard Dad sounds 537 00:18:07,868 --> 00:18:10,349 a lot smarter than Hanging from the Building Dad! 538 00:18:10,523 --> 00:18:11,699 I like the one with the beat. 539 00:18:11,873 --> 00:18:13,569 I came here today 'cause I thought 540 00:18:13,743 --> 00:18:16,877 I needed to learn to be a heroic man of action. 541 00:18:17,051 --> 00:18:19,097 But look at you. You're all nuts! 542 00:18:19,271 --> 00:18:21,535 Is anything worth all of this? I mean, Terry, 543 00:18:21,709 --> 00:18:23,405 I'm sorry you can't wear shorts. 544 00:18:23,579 --> 00:18:26,365 I would be devastated myself, but still! 545 00:18:26,539 --> 00:18:28,367 Also, just go to a doctor! 546 00:18:28,541 --> 00:18:30,544 Maybe sometimes the more heroic thing is 547 00:18:30,718 --> 00:18:33,373 to just let it the freak go! 548 00:18:33,547 --> 00:18:37,942 Now, who's gonna be the bigger man here, and just let it go?! 549 00:18:38,116 --> 00:18:40,596 I-I don't need a refund.I'll give you your refund. 550 00:18:40,770 --> 00:18:42,382 No, I said it first.I said it first! 551 00:18:42,556 --> 00:18:44,252 I'm the bigger man. No, I am! 552 00:18:44,426 --> 00:18:46,080 Sheldon, I'm sorry we ganged up on you about the food thing! 553 00:18:46,255 --> 00:18:47,865 I'm sorry I ganged up on all your food! 554 00:18:48,038 --> 00:18:50,259 Well, I forgive you!Thank you. Can I have my job back? 555 00:18:50,432 --> 00:18:51,739 No, you can't. It's not up to me. 556 00:18:51,913 --> 00:18:53,174 Remember Roger? He's in charge of it now. 557 00:18:53,348 --> 00:18:54,654 Can you believe it? 558 00:18:54,828 --> 00:18:56,787 Can someone just get a ladder already?! 559 00:18:56,961 --> 00:19:00,748 BOB: You know, Gene, in your own way, you kind of ended up 560 00:19:00,922 --> 00:19:02,750 saving the day today.Oh, thank God you finally said it. 561 00:19:02,923 --> 00:19:05,056 The whole car ride, I was, like, "Do I say it? 562 00:19:05,230 --> 00:19:07,363 No, he should be the one to say it. I'm not gonna say it." 563 00:19:07,537 --> 00:19:09,757 Well, I'm saying it, so, thanks. 564 00:19:09,931 --> 00:19:12,019 Huh. Today started with me wanting to learn from you, 565 00:19:12,193 --> 00:19:13,760 but then you learned from me. 566 00:19:13,934 --> 00:19:15,806 Does that make me your dad now? No. 567 00:19:15,980 --> 00:19:18,113 Do you want to switch for a while? I could take Mondays. 568 00:19:18,287 --> 00:19:19,809 Let's keep it like this for now. 569 00:19:19,983 --> 00:19:21,811 Well, you're still my hero, Dad. 570 00:19:21,986 --> 00:19:23,423 You're mine, too, Gene. 571 00:19:23,596 --> 00:19:25,598 Now how about we go inside and ice my butt? 572 00:19:25,772 --> 00:19:27,601 I wonder how many other dads are saying that 573 00:19:27,775 --> 00:19:29,603 to their sons right now. I bet a lot. 574 00:19:29,777 --> 00:19:31,299 JOCELYN: And that's why 575 00:19:31,473 --> 00:19:34,041 it truly was like a tale of two cities. 576 00:19:34,215 --> 00:19:35,478 But I feel like maybe next time, 577 00:19:35,652 --> 00:19:37,132 focus on the tale of just one city. 578 00:19:37,306 --> 00:19:39,742 And maybe that city is, like, a yogurt shop 579 00:19:39,916 --> 00:19:41,267 where cool teens work. 580 00:19:41,441 --> 00:19:42,572 I want to work there. Thank you. 581 00:19:42,746 --> 00:19:45,967 Okay, Jocelyn. Tina, you're up. 582 00:19:46,141 --> 00:19:48,230 Hi. Hi. Hi, everyone. [panting] 583 00:19:48,403 --> 00:19:50,753 Good job, Jocelyn. Thank you. 584 00:19:50,927 --> 00:19:53,931 [clears throat] 585 00:19:54,105 --> 00:19:55,237 [sighs] 586 00:19:55,411 --> 00:19:56,630 [weakly]: Ring, ring, ring. 587 00:19:56,804 --> 00:19:57,979 What did she just say? 588 00:20:00,154 --> 00:20:02,940 It's the... call of the... wild? 589 00:20:03,114 --> 00:20:05,115 Aah! I can't take it! I can't take it! 590 00:20:05,290 --> 00:20:06,988 [yelling] 591 00:20:07,162 --> 00:20:09,772 [kids gasp, Tina continues yelling] 592 00:20:09,946 --> 00:20:12,166 [grunting] 593 00:20:13,516 --> 00:20:14,734 Wow. Tina. 594 00:20:14,909 --> 00:20:17,346 That was, uh... Did you all see that? 595 00:20:17,519 --> 00:20:19,086 That was...Um, I... I'm-I'm sorry. 596 00:20:19,260 --> 00:20:20,609 ...amazing.Oh. 597 00:20:20,784 --> 00:20:22,960 You just embodied all the themes of the book. 598 00:20:23,134 --> 00:20:24,483 Huh.The primitivism, 599 00:20:24,657 --> 00:20:26,268 Buck's return to his savage nature.Yeah. 600 00:20:26,442 --> 00:20:27,964 The sweating. Great job. 601 00:20:28,138 --> 00:20:29,880 She was really good. That was really good. 602 00:20:30,054 --> 00:20:32,186 Well, I definitely read the book, so thank you.LINDA: Huh. 603 00:20:32,361 --> 00:20:34,798 She changed some things, but, uh, she still nailed it. 604 00:20:34,971 --> 00:20:37,626 She totally nailed it.So... say it, Bob. 605 00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:39,238 No. Say it. 606 00:20:39,412 --> 00:20:41,152 [sighs] You win best parent of the week. 607 00:20:41,326 --> 00:20:42,588 Yes! Yes! Me! 608 00:20:42,762 --> 00:20:44,067 I thought I won best parent of the week. 609 00:20:44,242 --> 00:20:45,721 Wait. How did you kids get out of class? 610 00:20:45,895 --> 00:20:47,028 Hey, don't worry about it. 611 00:20:47,201 --> 00:20:48,508 [panting]: Did I miss it? 612 00:20:48,682 --> 00:20:50,683 Tina! Did I miss it? 613 00:20:50,857 --> 00:20:53,469 LINDA: And a shimmy tap, a shimmy tap. 614 00:20:53,643 --> 00:20:55,689 A scooby tap, a scooby tap. 615 00:20:55,863 --> 00:20:58,734 A shibba-dabba, shibba-dabba, scooba-dooba-do, 616 00:20:58,909 --> 00:21:01,085 and no one's even looking at you, what you didn't do. 617 00:21:01,259 --> 00:21:03,871 And a-scabba-dooba-scabba-doo. 618 00:21:04,045 --> 00:21:06,568 Wiggle tap and jiggle tap. 619 00:21:06,742 --> 00:21:09,223 A shibba-dabba, shibba-dabba, scooba-dooba-do, 620 00:21:09,397 --> 00:21:11,791 and no one's even looking at you, what you didn't do. 621 00:21:11,965 --> 00:21:14,403 And a-scabba-dooba, scabba-dooba, scabba-dooba-day. 622 00:21:14,576 --> 00:21:17,231 The book report's over, and you got yourself an "A"! 623 00:21:17,405 --> 00:21:19,756 Ah, maybe B-minus, probably, in my experience. 624 00:21:19,930 --> 00:21:23,759 Shibba-dabba, shibba-dabba, shibba-dabba, shibba-dabba... 625 00:21:23,933 --> 00:21:26,546 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org