1 00:00:03,829 --> 00:00:06,831 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:13,490 --> 00:00:14,492 [tires screeching] 3 00:00:15,798 --> 00:00:16,754 [tires screeching] 4 00:00:19,975 --> 00:00:21,760 LINDA: Yay! 5 00:00:21,934 --> 00:00:23,327 Family TV night. 6 00:00:23,501 --> 00:00:25,676 Chippin' and sittin' and channel flippin'-- 7 00:00:25,850 --> 00:00:27,201 it's everything we're good at. 8 00:00:27,375 --> 00:00:28,811 Also windsurfing. We never tried it, 9 00:00:28,984 --> 00:00:30,464 but I think we'd surprise ourselves. 10 00:00:30,638 --> 00:00:32,902 I tried windsurfing once. That's the whole story. 11 00:00:33,076 --> 00:00:34,512 Shh. I love this commercial. 12 00:00:34,686 --> 00:00:36,036 Everyone, shh. 13 00:00:36,210 --> 00:00:37,646 I'm the Sofa Queen, 14 00:00:37,820 --> 00:00:39,734 and I'm here to banish your ugly furniture. 15 00:00:39,908 --> 00:00:42,302 This child's bedroom set offends me. 16 00:00:42,476 --> 00:00:43,912 Off with his bed. 17 00:00:44,087 --> 00:00:46,133 Boom! Just like that, he's got a new bed. 18 00:00:46,307 --> 00:00:48,351 That's a futon fit for a fool. 19 00:00:48,526 --> 00:00:50,875 I'm gonna replace it, but with a couch, 20 00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:53,226 [mouthing]: because normal adults do not own futons. 21 00:00:53,401 --> 00:00:55,838 Lin? Are you mouthing along with the commercial?Shh! 22 00:00:56,012 --> 00:00:57,360 [mouthing]: I command my subjects 23 00:00:57,534 --> 00:00:59,841 to visit the Sofa Queen Furniture Outlet. 24 00:01:00,015 --> 00:01:01,582 Off Route 9 in Bog Harbor. 25 00:01:01,756 --> 00:01:03,715 Boi-oi-oi-oing! 26 00:01:03,889 --> 00:01:06,022 Aw. I love the Sofa Queen. 27 00:01:06,195 --> 00:01:07,849 Her sofas are firm but they're fair. 28 00:01:08,024 --> 00:01:09,373 Uh, Dad?Yeah? 29 00:01:09,546 --> 00:01:10,808 While we're on the subject of couches, 30 00:01:10,983 --> 00:01:12,376 maybe it would be a good time for you and Mom 31 00:01:12,549 --> 00:01:14,378 to have, you know, the talk?Oh. 32 00:01:14,551 --> 00:01:15,900 What's she mean? What talk? 33 00:01:16,075 --> 00:01:18,120 Is this about how messy Mom's purse has been? 34 00:01:18,295 --> 00:01:20,557 I love balled-up receipts as much as the next guy, 35 00:01:20,731 --> 00:01:22,560 but come on!No, Gene. 36 00:01:22,734 --> 00:01:25,301 Um, Lin, you really love the Sofa Queen, right? 37 00:01:25,475 --> 00:01:27,216 Maybe we should go to her store sometime. 38 00:01:27,390 --> 00:01:28,566 Ooh, fun. 39 00:01:28,739 --> 00:01:29,698 That would be fun. 40 00:01:29,871 --> 00:01:31,612 And...? Dad...? 41 00:01:31,787 --> 00:01:34,049 Uh, and while we're there, 42 00:01:34,223 --> 00:01:35,485 maybe we could get a new couch. 43 00:01:35,659 --> 00:01:36,921 What?! 44 00:01:37,097 --> 00:01:39,098 No, Bobby, no. I love our couch. 45 00:01:39,272 --> 00:01:41,622 It's family. No, no, absolutely not. No. 46 00:01:41,796 --> 00:01:43,929 We'refamily. And we're sitting on the floor. 47 00:01:44,103 --> 00:01:45,627 The couch smells really bad, Lin. 48 00:01:45,801 --> 00:01:47,542 It smells like memories. 49 00:01:47,716 --> 00:01:49,283 Memory musk. 50 00:01:49,456 --> 00:01:51,240 It smells like if all the food we've spilled on it 51 00:01:51,414 --> 00:01:53,722 had a war with all the butts that sat on it. 52 00:01:53,896 --> 00:01:55,593 [inhaling] I'm mostly getting Dad. 53 00:01:55,766 --> 00:01:57,639 The stuffing in the cushions is all lumpy. 54 00:01:57,813 --> 00:01:59,944 Well your cushions are pretty lumpy, too, mister. 55 00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:02,599 Aw, I love your lumps. Come on, let me t... Come on, let me t...Ow, ow. Ow! 56 00:02:02,774 --> 00:02:04,733 Mom, there's a damp spot on the couch 57 00:02:04,906 --> 00:02:05,950 that somehow never dries. 58 00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:07,082 Ever! It's always there! 59 00:02:07,257 --> 00:02:09,128 Yeah, like magic. It's special. 60 00:02:09,302 --> 00:02:11,174 Mmm!We have a history 61 00:02:11,348 --> 00:02:14,568 with this couch. Gene had his first throw up on it, 'member? 62 00:02:14,742 --> 00:02:15,787 [grunts] 63 00:02:15,961 --> 00:02:17,006 I remember that happening 64 00:02:17,180 --> 00:02:18,528 in an infinity pool, but whatever. 65 00:02:18,703 --> 00:02:21,140 Tina teethed on the armrest. Remember that? 66 00:02:21,314 --> 00:02:23,447 [mumbles] 67 00:02:23,621 --> 00:02:25,579 Yeah, we called the pediatrician to see if couch foam 68 00:02:25,753 --> 00:02:27,711 was okay for babies. He said no. 69 00:02:27,885 --> 00:02:29,149 Aw, he did. 70 00:02:29,323 --> 00:02:30,627 He said she could've choked and died. 71 00:02:30,801 --> 00:02:31,977 And you, Louise, 72 00:02:32,151 --> 00:02:33,326 with your couch forts. 73 00:02:33,501 --> 00:02:34,763 Fire! 74 00:02:34,937 --> 00:02:36,417 Ugh, Mom, we get it. 75 00:02:36,591 --> 00:02:38,593 The couch is just a thing. And when things are old, 76 00:02:38,766 --> 00:02:40,550 you get rid of 'em. Like libraries. 77 00:02:40,724 --> 00:02:43,336 Okay, I think the fairest way to do this is to put it to a vote. 78 00:02:43,510 --> 00:02:46,122 Everyone in favor of replacing the couch raise your hand. 79 00:02:46,295 --> 00:02:47,471 [growls] 80 00:02:47,645 --> 00:02:49,473 Looks like it's three to two, Bob. 81 00:02:49,646 --> 00:02:51,344 Mom's right, Louise. The couch is family. 82 00:02:51,519 --> 00:02:53,259 You too, Gene? Seriously? 83 00:02:53,433 --> 00:02:55,305 You're asking me to vote against Mom? 84 00:02:55,478 --> 00:02:56,914 I know where my butter's breaded. 85 00:02:57,088 --> 00:02:58,612 That's my boy. 86 00:02:58,787 --> 00:02:59,656 Come up on the couch with Mama. 87 00:02:59,831 --> 00:03:00,962 Come on.No! 88 00:03:01,137 --> 00:03:02,573 I think I'm gonna get some snacks. 89 00:03:02,747 --> 00:03:04,705 Dad, you like snacks, right? You snack, huh? 90 00:03:04,879 --> 00:03:05,794 Uh, sure, sometimes. 91 00:03:05,967 --> 00:03:06,925 [scoffing] 92 00:03:07,098 --> 00:03:08,056 Why are you pulling me?Ugh! 93 00:03:08,230 --> 00:03:09,145 What happened out there, Dad? 94 00:03:09,318 --> 00:03:10,450 Where-where were you? 95 00:03:10,625 --> 00:03:11,669 Louise, I tried. 96 00:03:11,842 --> 00:03:13,235 Not hard enough. 97 00:03:13,409 --> 00:03:15,194 Look, we'll get rid of the couch someday. 98 00:03:15,368 --> 00:03:17,240 How? Mom's never gonna give it up. 99 00:03:17,413 --> 00:03:19,546 I don't know, maybe something will happen to it. 100 00:03:19,721 --> 00:03:21,549 Were you serious about the snacks? 'Cause I hid some 101 00:03:21,723 --> 00:03:23,550 fudge pretzels from Gene, if you're interested. 102 00:03:23,724 --> 00:03:26,205 Back up. What-what do you mean, something will happen to it? 103 00:03:26,379 --> 00:03:28,425 I don't know. Maybe something will happen to the couch 104 00:03:28,598 --> 00:03:30,687 that'll make even your mom want to get rid of it. 105 00:03:30,861 --> 00:03:32,341 Right. 106 00:03:32,515 --> 00:03:35,344 Accidents happen to couches every day.Sure. 107 00:03:35,519 --> 00:03:36,867 I bet that's true.Mm-hmm. 108 00:03:37,042 --> 00:03:39,479 Found 'em. Ugh, Gene got to 'em. 109 00:03:39,653 --> 00:03:41,829 And he left a note. "Checkmate." 110 00:03:43,353 --> 00:03:45,354 [snoring] 111 00:03:50,360 --> 00:03:51,840 Oops! What am I doing? 112 00:03:52,014 --> 00:03:53,319 [laughing]: Oops, I keep doing it. 113 00:03:53,493 --> 00:03:55,365 Stop.[sawing continues] 114 00:03:55,538 --> 00:03:57,411 Yay, family TV night! 115 00:03:57,585 --> 00:03:59,413 Why do we call it family TV night 116 00:03:59,586 --> 00:04:01,197 if we do it every night? 117 00:04:01,371 --> 00:04:02,894 Louise, you sure you don't want to join your mom 118 00:04:03,068 --> 00:04:04,243 over here on the couch? 119 00:04:04,418 --> 00:04:05,723 Uh, pass. 120 00:04:05,896 --> 00:04:07,203 Fine. More couch for me. 121 00:04:07,377 --> 00:04:09,552 Gene! Tina! Where are you? 122 00:04:09,727 --> 00:04:11,294 Get in on this, babies. 123 00:04:11,467 --> 00:04:13,164 First one on the couch gets to pick the show. 124 00:04:13,340 --> 00:04:14,906 You drive a hard bargain, woman. 125 00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:16,690 I want something with adult situations 126 00:04:16,865 --> 00:04:17,908 but I'd settle for mature themes. 127 00:04:18,082 --> 00:04:19,824 Sit, sit, sit, sit, sit, sit. 128 00:04:19,997 --> 00:04:20,911 Aah! 129 00:04:21,086 --> 00:04:23,740 [distorted screams] 130 00:04:23,915 --> 00:04:25,742 Oh, my God! 131 00:04:25,917 --> 00:04:26,875 Oh, my word! 132 00:04:27,048 --> 00:04:28,093 Oh, my God!Couch? 133 00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:29,355 Couch, say something! 134 00:04:29,529 --> 00:04:31,096 Give it mouth to mouth! 135 00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:33,576 Well, I guess we're getting a new couch after all. 136 00:04:33,750 --> 00:04:35,362 Yay! 137 00:04:35,536 --> 00:04:36,711 Anyway. Yay. 138 00:04:36,884 --> 00:04:38,278 [cries] 139 00:04:42,933 --> 00:04:44,370 The couch was too beautiful for this world. 140 00:04:44,545 --> 00:04:46,110 I'm sorry, Lin. What's that? 141 00:04:46,286 --> 00:04:48,461 It's instructions for whoever wants to take it home, Bob. 142 00:04:48,636 --> 00:04:50,593 Oh. That's optimistic. 143 00:04:50,768 --> 00:04:53,293 "Good with children. Does not fold out into a bed. 144 00:04:53,466 --> 00:04:54,946 Just folds out because it's broken." 145 00:04:55,120 --> 00:04:56,644 Oh, my God! What happened here? 146 00:04:56,817 --> 00:04:58,122 The couch is gone, Teddy. 147 00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:00,778 Linda, Linda, Linda. I am so sorry. 148 00:05:00,951 --> 00:05:02,779 Oh, you know, I... I-I just keep having 149 00:05:02,954 --> 00:05:04,608 to tell myself it's-it's life. 150 00:05:04,781 --> 00:05:06,218 It is.You know? It's natural. 151 00:05:06,392 --> 00:05:08,829 It is. I got a recliner that's getting on in years. 152 00:05:09,004 --> 00:05:10,831 Might be time to start making arrangements. 153 00:05:11,005 --> 00:05:12,963 Come on, people. Are we gonna stand around all day, 154 00:05:13,137 --> 00:05:14,836 or are we gonna go get a new couch? 155 00:05:15,009 --> 00:05:16,228 Oh, hold your horses. 156 00:05:16,403 --> 00:05:18,012 I want to be here if anyone takes it. 157 00:05:18,187 --> 00:05:19,709 Uh, I can keep an eye on it. 158 00:05:19,884 --> 00:05:21,581 I'll be here all day. Mr. Fischoeder hired me 159 00:05:21,755 --> 00:05:22,973 to do some repairs next door. 160 00:05:23,148 --> 00:05:24,672 The holistic healing place that moved out 161 00:05:24,846 --> 00:05:26,369 stripped all the copper out of the walls. 162 00:05:26,543 --> 00:05:28,545 Hmm.Still smells like incense in there, though. 163 00:05:28,718 --> 00:05:30,851 It's gonna be my most relaxing day of work ever. 164 00:05:31,026 --> 00:05:33,115 Anyway, I'll see that the couch goes to a good home. 165 00:05:33,288 --> 00:05:34,463 Aw, thank you, Teddy. 166 00:05:34,637 --> 00:05:35,899 Yeah, thanks, Teddy! Bye! 167 00:05:36,074 --> 00:05:37,858 Wait, wait, I need to get a picture. 168 00:05:38,033 --> 00:05:39,120 And a lock of its hair. 169 00:05:39,295 --> 00:05:40,949 Ooh, it's my hair. 170 00:05:42,298 --> 00:05:43,821 Here we are. The commercial 171 00:05:43,995 --> 00:05:46,215 doesn't do the place justice. Actually, it does. 172 00:05:46,389 --> 00:05:49,523 [gasps] There she is. Oh. 173 00:05:49,697 --> 00:05:51,654 Welcome to the Sofa Queen Furniture Outlet. 174 00:05:51,829 --> 00:05:53,221 What can I furnish you with today? 175 00:05:53,396 --> 00:05:56,312 Uh, is the Sofa Queen here? My wife is a huge fan. 176 00:05:56,485 --> 00:05:58,009 I'm afraid she's not, at the moment. 177 00:05:58,182 --> 00:05:59,533 Great. The queen's not even here? 178 00:05:59,706 --> 00:06:01,317 Oh, what's the point of anything? 179 00:06:01,490 --> 00:06:03,754 Well, the queen might not be here, 180 00:06:03,927 --> 00:06:05,625 but maybe you'd like to meet her loyal servant 181 00:06:05,800 --> 00:06:08,149 and brother-in-law, the Sofa Jester. 182 00:06:08,324 --> 00:06:09,673 That's me. 183 00:06:09,846 --> 00:06:11,021 [humming a tune] 184 00:06:13,850 --> 00:06:16,245 Well, this is kind of fun. Right? Lin? 185 00:06:16,418 --> 00:06:18,769 Maybe. Say what you say in the commercial. 186 00:06:18,942 --> 00:06:22,512 Oh, you mean: "Off Route 9 in Bog Harbor. Boi-oi-oi-oing!" 187 00:06:22,685 --> 00:06:24,862 Again.Off Route 9 in Bog Harbor. 188 00:06:25,036 --> 00:06:26,386 Boi-oi-oi-oi-oing! 189 00:06:26,560 --> 00:06:27,516 I'm numb, say it until I feel something. 190 00:06:27,690 --> 00:06:29,040 Lin... 191 00:06:29,213 --> 00:06:30,564 Off Route 9 in Bog Harbor. 192 00:06:30,737 --> 00:06:32,043 Boi-oi-oi-oi-oing! 193 00:06:32,216 --> 00:06:33,870 One more time.Okay, that's okay. 194 00:06:34,045 --> 00:06:35,699 Thanks. Thanks. No, no, no. We're done.Why? What? 195 00:06:35,872 --> 00:06:37,004 Let's go browse around. 196 00:06:37,178 --> 00:06:38,485 Oh, just browsing? 197 00:06:38,658 --> 00:06:39,747 No, no, we're gonna, I mean, 198 00:06:39,920 --> 00:06:41,225 we're definitely gonna buy something. 199 00:06:41,401 --> 00:06:42,879 No. It's okay, you're browsing. 200 00:06:43,053 --> 00:06:45,447 Um, uh, no. We're browsing until we buy. 201 00:06:45,622 --> 00:06:47,406 I'll believe it when I see it. 202 00:06:47,581 --> 00:06:49,538 BOB: Wow. So many options. 203 00:06:49,713 --> 00:06:51,411 It's like a rave for furniture. 204 00:06:51,584 --> 00:06:53,237 [phone rings]Oh, it's Teddy. 205 00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:55,588 Hi, Teddy.Hi, Lin. It's Teddy. 206 00:06:55,762 --> 00:06:57,547 Yeah. The couch, the couch! How's the couch? 207 00:06:57,721 --> 00:06:59,288 Uh, it's okay, it's here with me now. 208 00:06:59,461 --> 00:07:01,769 One guy showed some interest, but he had a beard, 209 00:07:01,942 --> 00:07:03,596 so I moved him along.Ew, a beard. 210 00:07:03,771 --> 00:07:05,903 Shoo, shoo! Some pigeons just landed on it. 211 00:07:06,076 --> 00:07:07,904 Oh! Get 'em off. Get 'em off it!Hey, shoo. Shoo. 212 00:07:08,079 --> 00:07:09,559 Aw, come on, get out of here. 213 00:07:09,733 --> 00:07:12,257 Get out of here!Now pigeons. Pigeons are on it now. 214 00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:14,084 Get off the couch! No, it was... 215 00:07:14,259 --> 00:07:15,783 [stammers] No, no, no, I'm yelling at the pigeons. 216 00:07:15,956 --> 00:07:17,218 [stammers] You can't tell what I'm doing here? 217 00:07:17,393 --> 00:07:18,567 I'm yelling at the pigeons. 218 00:07:18,742 --> 00:07:20,483 Officer, I'm yelling at the pigeons. 219 00:07:20,656 --> 00:07:23,399 Geez! Mom's got to pull herself together and move on. 220 00:07:23,572 --> 00:07:25,096 Give her some time. She's in shock. 221 00:07:25,269 --> 00:07:27,403 What happened to the couch was such a weird freak accident. 222 00:07:27,576 --> 00:07:29,274 [cackling] 223 00:07:29,449 --> 00:07:30,884 Why are you laughing like that? 224 00:07:31,059 --> 00:07:32,451 Weird freak accident? 225 00:07:32,625 --> 00:07:34,235 Oh, my God. 226 00:07:34,409 --> 00:07:35,759 Yeah.You did that? 227 00:07:35,932 --> 00:07:37,413 Did I weaken the wood under the couch 228 00:07:37,586 --> 00:07:38,935 by shaving it down with the file 229 00:07:39,110 --> 00:07:40,415 Mom uses on your toenails? 230 00:07:40,590 --> 00:07:42,069 No. Wink. 231 00:07:42,244 --> 00:07:43,288 I can't believe it. 232 00:07:43,463 --> 00:07:44,550 Well, you should, because 233 00:07:44,725 --> 00:07:45,769 it was your idea, Dad. 234 00:07:45,942 --> 00:07:47,641 What?! No, it wasn't. 235 00:07:47,814 --> 00:07:49,643 [deep voice]: Maybe something will happen to the couch. 236 00:07:49,817 --> 00:07:50,947 I get it...You said that. 237 00:07:51,122 --> 00:07:52,254 I said... But I didn't mean... 238 00:07:52,427 --> 00:07:53,473 You ordered a hit. 239 00:07:53,646 --> 00:07:54,778 You can't unorder it. 240 00:07:54,951 --> 00:07:56,779 I did not order a hit, Louise. 241 00:07:56,954 --> 00:07:58,869 You didn't want to dirty your pretty hands, 242 00:07:59,043 --> 00:08:01,175 but you're not gonna hang me out to dry on this! 243 00:08:01,350 --> 00:08:02,829 Oh, God, here she comes. 244 00:08:03,004 --> 00:08:05,180 [whispering]: This isn't over.It is over, 245 00:08:05,353 --> 00:08:06,920 'cause we're getting a new couch, 'cause I did 246 00:08:07,095 --> 00:08:08,444 what you didn't have the dumplings to do. 247 00:08:08,617 --> 00:08:10,141 Hi, Mom.Hi, Lin. 248 00:08:10,314 --> 00:08:12,274 Teddy said somebody in shorts tried to sit on the couch. 249 00:08:12,447 --> 00:08:13,622 He got there just in time. 250 00:08:13,797 --> 00:08:14,928 That's great. 251 00:08:15,103 --> 00:08:17,018 Well, uh, time to look around. 252 00:08:17,192 --> 00:08:18,802 Look at all the high chairs. 253 00:08:18,975 --> 00:08:20,281 That's the way to live. Why does anyone 254 00:08:20,456 --> 00:08:21,675 use low chairs anyway? 255 00:08:21,848 --> 00:08:23,980 Yeah! All chairs should have safety straps 256 00:08:24,154 --> 00:08:25,591 and pictures of bears on them. 257 00:08:25,766 --> 00:08:27,028 I'm gonna ask Mom and Dad to buy one. 258 00:08:27,201 --> 00:08:28,637 I'm sure I could still fit. 259 00:08:28,812 --> 00:08:31,511 Ha! Good luck, Teenage Mutant Teenager Legs. 260 00:08:31,685 --> 00:08:33,469 Uh, look who's talking, Girth Brooks. 261 00:08:33,643 --> 00:08:34,991 I beg your pardon? 262 00:08:35,165 --> 00:08:36,690 I've been a size six for years. 263 00:08:36,864 --> 00:08:39,169 I bet I can still fit in a high chair and you can't. 264 00:08:39,344 --> 00:08:40,823 What's the winner get? 265 00:08:40,998 --> 00:08:43,086 Hmm. A week of piggyback rides? 266 00:08:43,260 --> 00:08:43,957 You're on. 267 00:08:44,131 --> 00:08:45,176 [both grunting] 268 00:08:45,350 --> 00:08:46,525 Uh, uh, uh.Huh? 269 00:08:46,700 --> 00:08:48,004 SALESMAN: Let me guess, high chair bet? 270 00:08:48,178 --> 00:08:49,528 Uh...Uh... 271 00:08:49,702 --> 00:08:51,486 I've seen it before and it doesn't end well. 272 00:08:51,661 --> 00:08:53,706 Sorry, we'll get down.No, please. 273 00:08:53,880 --> 00:08:55,664 I support your foolhardy wager. 274 00:08:55,838 --> 00:08:57,187 We have a "you break it, you buy it" policy 275 00:08:57,361 --> 00:08:58,450 and I work on commission. 276 00:08:58,625 --> 00:09:00,017 Wow, what a nice guy. 277 00:09:00,191 --> 00:09:02,889 So this is fun, right? It's going pretty good. 278 00:09:03,063 --> 00:09:05,413 You think so? We've looked at 12 couches, Louise. 279 00:09:05,587 --> 00:09:07,850 Your Mom yelled at three of them and gave one the finger. 280 00:09:08,024 --> 00:09:10,331 Ooh, try this one, Mom. Take it for a spin. 281 00:09:10,505 --> 00:09:12,028 I'll sit on it because I'm tired. 282 00:09:12,202 --> 00:09:13,900 This doesn't mean anything, Mr. Couch. 283 00:09:14,075 --> 00:09:15,250 No funny business. 284 00:09:15,423 --> 00:09:16,860 Well? How does it feel? 285 00:09:17,033 --> 00:09:19,210 Eh. Maybe this one's not terrible. 286 00:09:19,384 --> 00:09:20,864 Come here, come-come try it.Ha! 287 00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:23,911 Yeah. It does feel good. 288 00:09:24,085 --> 00:09:25,173 It's all right. It's okay.Hmm. 289 00:09:25,346 --> 00:09:26,826 Yeah, not bad. 290 00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:30,264 Just browsing? Okay. There you go. Walking away. 291 00:09:30,438 --> 00:09:31,961 All right, coast is clear. 292 00:09:32,135 --> 00:09:34,051 On the count of three, jump into your high chair. 293 00:09:34,225 --> 00:09:35,356 Is this how babies do it? 294 00:09:35,530 --> 00:09:37,663 Fun babies. One... 295 00:09:37,837 --> 00:09:39,013 This might be a bad idea. 296 00:09:39,187 --> 00:09:40,580 Two... 297 00:09:40,754 --> 00:09:42,190 I take it back, it's a great idea! 298 00:09:42,364 --> 00:09:43,278 BOB: Gene, Tina. 299 00:09:43,451 --> 00:09:45,409 Ugh. What does he want? 300 00:09:45,585 --> 00:09:47,238 Oh! Found one you like, huh? 301 00:09:47,412 --> 00:09:48,892 Well, you have excellent taste. 302 00:09:49,066 --> 00:09:51,286 This might be the comfiest couch in the store. 303 00:09:51,460 --> 00:09:53,679 And I'm not just pushin' cushions. Boi-oi-oi-oing! 304 00:09:53,854 --> 00:09:55,595 Mm. Maybe no more boings.Sorry. 305 00:09:55,769 --> 00:09:58,249 Uh, guys, try out this couch.Nice. 306 00:09:58,423 --> 00:09:59,599 This is some real butt candy. 307 00:09:59,773 --> 00:10:01,426 It doesn't drip when you sit on it. 308 00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:03,558 We'll take it. No need to wrap it up, we'll wear it home. 309 00:10:03,732 --> 00:10:04,865 Uh, how much does it cost? 310 00:10:05,038 --> 00:10:06,301 Only $1,399.99. 311 00:10:06,475 --> 00:10:07,562 Kids, get off. Don't even look at it. 312 00:10:07,736 --> 00:10:09,129 Well, n... Wait, wait. 313 00:10:09,303 --> 00:10:12,089 I could sell you this floor model for $499.99. 314 00:10:12,263 --> 00:10:13,743 Wow, now that's a good deal. 315 00:10:13,917 --> 00:10:14,788 Boi-oi-oi... 316 00:10:14,961 --> 00:10:15,962 Sorry.Thank you. 317 00:10:16,136 --> 00:10:17,659 Mm-hmm. Now there's no returns 318 00:10:17,833 --> 00:10:20,096 and I have to point out it does have a stain on it. 319 00:10:21,750 --> 00:10:23,578 [all laugh] 320 00:10:23,753 --> 00:10:25,407 We'll teach it what stains are. 321 00:10:25,581 --> 00:10:26,581 So you'll take it? 322 00:10:26,755 --> 00:10:28,105 Mom, are you okay with this? 323 00:10:28,278 --> 00:10:31,107 Sure. Sure, let's do it. Let's do it. 324 00:10:31,282 --> 00:10:32,761 Terrific! I'll get the paperwork. 325 00:10:32,936 --> 00:10:34,634 And I'm supposed to do my little jester dance 326 00:10:34,807 --> 00:10:36,070 when I make a sale. 327 00:10:36,244 --> 00:10:37,418 Uh, we're good. You sure? 328 00:10:37,592 --> 00:10:38,812 It's quite playful. 329 00:10:38,985 --> 00:10:40,813 Fine. Just go ahead, yeah, yeah, do it. 330 00:10:40,988 --> 00:10:42,642 ♪ Yuh, gah-gah gah-gah, goy ♪ 331 00:10:42,816 --> 00:10:43,947 ♪ Yuh, mm, hey, ma-mommy ♪ 332 00:10:44,120 --> 00:10:45,774 ♪ Uh-ma, may, na, byoya, oh! ♪ 333 00:10:45,948 --> 00:10:47,602 Linda, this is gonna be good, right? 334 00:10:47,777 --> 00:10:49,299 Yeah, you're right. 335 00:10:49,474 --> 00:10:51,519 Maybe this was for the best, you know? Who knows? 336 00:10:51,693 --> 00:10:54,043 See, Dad? It worked. What? 337 00:10:54,217 --> 00:10:56,003 Hmm? What did yo...? Wait. What did you say? 338 00:10:56,177 --> 00:10:58,265 I don't know. What-what did you... what did you say? 339 00:10:58,440 --> 00:10:59,788 The... Wh-What? 340 00:10:59,962 --> 00:11:02,312 You said, "It worked." What... worked? 341 00:11:02,486 --> 00:11:03,750 What worked?! All right, fine! 342 00:11:03,923 --> 00:11:05,142 We put the couch out of its misery! 343 00:11:05,316 --> 00:11:06,621 It was dying anyway. 344 00:11:06,796 --> 00:11:07,971 What?! What?! Oh, God. 345 00:11:08,144 --> 00:11:10,234 But look at this! Pretty new couch, right? 346 00:11:10,408 --> 00:11:11,932 It's so pretty. 347 00:11:12,105 --> 00:11:13,889 Who's "we?" Bob? Mm. What? 348 00:11:14,063 --> 00:11:16,326 "We put the couch out of its misery." Who's we? 349 00:11:16,500 --> 00:11:17,850 Wha-What? I... I'm sorry. I... What? 350 00:11:18,024 --> 00:11:20,157 Were you a part of this?I would like to say, 351 00:11:20,331 --> 00:11:21,985 I was just getting fudge pretzels, and... 352 00:11:22,158 --> 00:11:23,508 Checkmate! I know, Gene. 353 00:11:23,682 --> 00:11:25,815 And I did not mean in any way to cause... 354 00:11:25,989 --> 00:11:28,513 Monsters! Monsters! 355 00:11:28,687 --> 00:11:29,818 Linda! Wait! 356 00:11:29,993 --> 00:11:32,517 [Linda mutters, cries, wails] 357 00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:35,216 Okay. Perhaps I can throw in some pillows and blankets, 358 00:11:35,389 --> 00:11:37,957 'cause it looks like you're gonna be sleeping on this couch. 359 00:11:38,131 --> 00:11:40,350 Ha! Jesters. Always gotta be on. 360 00:11:45,008 --> 00:11:47,009 [panting]: Linda! Wait! 361 00:11:47,183 --> 00:11:48,969 You and Louise killed the couch, Bob! 362 00:11:49,143 --> 00:11:50,621 You Kevorkianed it! 363 00:11:50,797 --> 00:11:52,320 Lin? Lin? 364 00:11:52,494 --> 00:11:54,365 Look, I'm not good at running around things, 365 00:11:54,538 --> 00:11:56,366 so just stop, so we can talk. 366 00:11:56,540 --> 00:11:58,065 Why'd you do it, Louise? 367 00:11:58,239 --> 00:12:00,720 You played God, and our couch wasn't even religious! 368 00:12:00,894 --> 00:12:03,070 Oh, don't you two couch-huggers start with me! 369 00:12:03,244 --> 00:12:04,114 Huh. 370 00:12:04,288 --> 00:12:05,725 That lady looks familiar. 371 00:12:05,899 --> 00:12:07,682 GENE [gasping]: It's the Sofa Queen! 372 00:12:07,856 --> 00:12:09,510 The leader of the Ottoman Empire. 373 00:12:09,684 --> 00:12:13,210 Excuse me. I got to see a sofa queen about a drama queen. 374 00:12:13,384 --> 00:12:14,211 [knocking on door] 375 00:12:14,384 --> 00:12:15,211 Who is it? 376 00:12:15,385 --> 00:12:17,692 Uh, your Royal Highness? 377 00:12:17,866 --> 00:12:20,216 [regal fanfare plays] 378 00:12:20,390 --> 00:12:22,828 Oh, my God, it's the Sofa Queen. 379 00:12:23,003 --> 00:12:24,568 Curtsy time! Oh, right. 380 00:12:24,744 --> 00:12:26,528 [Gene and Tina groaning] 381 00:12:26,701 --> 00:12:28,225 Is that your wife? 382 00:12:28,399 --> 00:12:32,099 [sobbing] 383 00:12:32,273 --> 00:12:33,577 What'd you do to her? 384 00:12:33,753 --> 00:12:35,275 It's... uh, uh... it's a long story. 385 00:12:35,450 --> 00:12:37,538 I thought we were getting a snack, and then, I... 386 00:12:37,712 --> 00:12:40,236 Okay, okay, okay. Let the woman with the crown talk her down. 387 00:12:40,411 --> 00:12:41,890 She's really good at this. 388 00:12:42,065 --> 00:12:43,719 She talked me into marrying her sister. 389 00:12:43,893 --> 00:12:45,547 That's why she's the queen and you're not. 390 00:12:45,721 --> 00:12:47,070 I know, I know. 391 00:12:47,244 --> 00:12:48,855 You could never be queen. I know! 392 00:12:49,028 --> 00:12:51,857 [gasping, jabbering, wailing] 393 00:12:52,032 --> 00:12:53,467 [sniffling] 394 00:12:53,642 --> 00:12:55,948 Please don't blow your nose on my display furniture. 395 00:12:56,123 --> 00:12:57,777 [gasps] It's you. 396 00:12:57,951 --> 00:12:59,429 Your Majesty, it's really you! 397 00:12:59,604 --> 00:13:00,909 And it's really you, 398 00:13:01,083 --> 00:13:03,086 lady crying in the middle of a store. 399 00:13:03,259 --> 00:13:05,436 Come on, make some room. [cries] 400 00:13:05,610 --> 00:13:07,917 Oh, I don't like this. We sell this? 401 00:13:08,091 --> 00:13:09,440 Did you bring this? 402 00:13:09,614 --> 00:13:11,051 I don't think so. 403 00:13:11,225 --> 00:13:12,616 Not much we can do here. 404 00:13:12,792 --> 00:13:14,053 Yeah, Sofa Queen's got this. 405 00:13:14,227 --> 00:13:16,317 To the high chairs?To the high chairs. 406 00:13:16,490 --> 00:13:18,100 [whispering]: To the high chairs! 407 00:13:18,274 --> 00:13:20,277 They did what?! I know, right? 408 00:13:20,451 --> 00:13:22,452 You don't do that to a woman's couch! 409 00:13:22,626 --> 00:13:24,280 The couch I raised my babies on! 410 00:13:24,455 --> 00:13:25,716 Horrible! Hey, Bob! 411 00:13:25,892 --> 00:13:26,761 Oh, no. 412 00:13:26,936 --> 00:13:28,154 Uh, yes, Your Majesty? 413 00:13:28,328 --> 00:13:29,286 What's wrong with you? 414 00:13:29,460 --> 00:13:30,461 I didn't, um... 415 00:13:30,634 --> 00:13:31,722 I wasn't thinking. 416 00:13:31,898 --> 00:13:33,115 It's complicated 'cause I-- 417 00:13:33,289 --> 00:13:34,725 Don't touch that!Sorry. 418 00:13:34,900 --> 00:13:36,119 I got to say, 419 00:13:36,293 --> 00:13:37,467 that sounds like a special couch. 420 00:13:37,642 --> 00:13:38,947 You got any pictures? 421 00:13:39,121 --> 00:13:40,297 Yeah, I took one this morning-- here. 422 00:13:40,471 --> 00:13:41,471 Look, there you go. Mm. 423 00:13:41,645 --> 00:13:44,171 Oh, that's, uh... Yeah. 424 00:13:44,345 --> 00:13:45,912 Uh... Hmm. 425 00:13:46,086 --> 00:13:47,303 Good couch, right? 426 00:13:47,477 --> 00:13:48,870 It's got character. 427 00:13:49,044 --> 00:13:51,307 Yeah, it's got character splattered all over it. 428 00:13:51,481 --> 00:13:54,789 Linda, that's what we call in the industry a nasty couch. 429 00:13:54,963 --> 00:13:57,445 Oh. Right. I gue... I gue... I guess it's bad. 430 00:13:57,619 --> 00:13:58,793 I guess it's bad. [chuckles] 431 00:13:58,967 --> 00:14:00,187 Okay, it's bad. 432 00:14:00,360 --> 00:14:01,971 Linda, you're gonna think 433 00:14:02,144 --> 00:14:04,278 I'm only trying to sell you a new couch, and I am. 434 00:14:04,451 --> 00:14:05,756 I'm the Sofa Queen. 435 00:14:05,932 --> 00:14:07,455 But I think you know what you gotta do. 436 00:14:07,629 --> 00:14:08,847 What? You know. 437 00:14:09,022 --> 00:14:10,283 I do? Yes. 438 00:14:10,457 --> 00:14:11,676 New couch? New couch. 439 00:14:11,850 --> 00:14:13,677 I love you. I know. 440 00:14:13,852 --> 00:14:15,679 Give me huggies! Too much. 441 00:14:15,855 --> 00:14:17,333 Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Sorry. 442 00:14:17,508 --> 00:14:19,509 Don't touch the queen.Sor-Sorry. Sorry. 443 00:14:19,683 --> 00:14:21,643 So it's really happening-- we're getting a new couch. 444 00:14:21,817 --> 00:14:23,863 It is, and you are welcome. 445 00:14:24,037 --> 00:14:25,690 We're actually replacing Old Stinko. 446 00:14:25,865 --> 00:14:27,169 Yup. 447 00:14:27,344 --> 00:14:28,605 John Stain-mos. 448 00:14:28,779 --> 00:14:29,650 Mm-hmm. 449 00:14:29,825 --> 00:14:31,653 Old... Fartcatcher. 450 00:14:31,826 --> 00:14:33,133 Okay, Dad, take it easy. 451 00:14:33,307 --> 00:14:34,524 Back off a little. 452 00:14:34,698 --> 00:14:36,004 Sorry, I-I got on a roll there. 453 00:14:36,178 --> 00:14:37,485 [both yelling] 454 00:14:37,658 --> 00:14:38,921 Get it off! Get it off! 455 00:14:39,095 --> 00:14:41,489 Why did we do this?! It pinches! It pinches! 456 00:14:41,663 --> 00:14:43,533 This can't be safe for babies! [groaning] 457 00:14:43,707 --> 00:14:45,014 [Tina and Gene groaning]Aah! 458 00:14:45,187 --> 00:14:46,581 Why am I doing this?! 459 00:14:46,754 --> 00:14:48,582 I knew I wouldn't fit. What came over me?! 460 00:14:48,756 --> 00:14:51,019 It's intoxicating! Aah! 461 00:14:51,193 --> 00:14:52,760 LINDA: Come on, everybody eat faster 462 00:14:52,934 --> 00:14:54,501 so we can start TV night on the new couch! 463 00:14:54,676 --> 00:14:56,068 Where are the napkins? 464 00:14:56,243 --> 00:14:57,331 Do you mean the paper towel roll? 465 00:14:57,504 --> 00:14:58,722 Yeah. 466 00:14:58,898 --> 00:14:59,855 This guy hangs out with a queen. 467 00:15:00,028 --> 00:15:01,769 Now he's using napkins. 468 00:15:01,943 --> 00:15:04,380 [sighs] Someone kicked the paper towel roll down the hall. 469 00:15:04,554 --> 00:15:06,557 Again. Louise, did you do that? 470 00:15:06,730 --> 00:15:08,558 Kick the paper towel roll? Of course. 471 00:15:08,732 --> 00:15:10,212 It's a paper towel roll. 472 00:15:10,386 --> 00:15:12,085 Right. Well, would you get it, please? 473 00:15:12,259 --> 00:15:13,650 Ugh! Fine! 474 00:15:16,697 --> 00:15:18,700 Oh. Huh. 475 00:15:18,874 --> 00:15:21,094 Hi. Well, this is awkward. 476 00:15:21,268 --> 00:15:24,052 Just... not gonna look out there again. 477 00:15:24,226 --> 00:15:25,576 Oh, God, I looked. 478 00:15:25,750 --> 00:15:27,230 I see you, okay? 479 00:15:27,403 --> 00:15:28,927 I know what you're trying to pull, 480 00:15:29,101 --> 00:15:30,277 looking all pathetic on the curb. 481 00:15:30,451 --> 00:15:31,755 But it's not gonna work. 482 00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:33,366 I'll just close my eyes. 483 00:15:33,540 --> 00:15:34,759 [laughs] 484 00:15:34,933 --> 00:15:36,370 Okay, shouldn't have closed my eyes. 485 00:15:36,543 --> 00:15:38,024 Louise, I need a paper towel, please. 486 00:15:38,197 --> 00:15:40,025 Gene motorboated his pasta again. 487 00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:42,071 Oh.Mm-hmm. Old couch. 488 00:15:42,245 --> 00:15:44,595 Yup. It's gonna be fine, right? 489 00:15:44,769 --> 00:15:46,249 Are you kidding? It's gonna be great! 490 00:15:46,423 --> 00:15:48,599 It's got a rich, full life ahead of it. 491 00:15:48,773 --> 00:15:50,123 Ooh! Ooh! 492 00:15:50,297 --> 00:15:51,601 It-It's gonna shake that off. 493 00:15:51,775 --> 00:15:52,777 Yeah, that wasn't... that sad. 494 00:15:52,951 --> 00:15:53,908 No. 495 00:15:54,082 --> 00:15:55,040 There you are! 496 00:15:55,215 --> 00:15:56,563 You missed the part of dinner 497 00:15:56,738 --> 00:15:58,086 where we all put our plates in the sink 498 00:15:58,260 --> 00:15:59,783 and pretend somebody's gonna do the dishes. 499 00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:01,047 All right, new couch, here we come!So this is 500 00:16:01,221 --> 00:16:02,787 what it feels like to sit upright. 501 00:16:02,961 --> 00:16:04,267 It's nice. The room looks different. 502 00:16:04,441 --> 00:16:05,921 Oh, here comes another car. 503 00:16:06,095 --> 00:16:07,443 Is it gonna...? Oh, God.[water splashing] 504 00:16:07,618 --> 00:16:09,097 It hit the puddle. 505 00:16:09,272 --> 00:16:10,620 Looked like he went out of his way to hit it. 506 00:16:10,794 --> 00:16:12,100 What am I being so sappy about? 507 00:16:12,274 --> 00:16:13,450 Sure I liked making couch forts, 508 00:16:13,624 --> 00:16:15,017 but I can make forts with the new couch. 509 00:16:15,191 --> 00:16:16,801 Uh, actually, the cushions don't come off. 510 00:16:16,975 --> 00:16:19,152 Oh. Okay, but the old couch isscruffy. 511 00:16:19,326 --> 00:16:20,804 I mean... [scoffs] 512 00:16:20,980 --> 00:16:22,894 we don't keep scruffy things in this house, right? 513 00:16:23,068 --> 00:16:24,940 Are you serious? Oh, right. 514 00:16:25,114 --> 00:16:26,985 Yeah. It's like Scruff City. 515 00:16:30,727 --> 00:16:31,773 Son of a bitch. 516 00:16:31,947 --> 00:16:33,121 We gotta go get it. 517 00:16:33,296 --> 00:16:34,341 Hmm. Sounds like you just said, 518 00:16:34,514 --> 00:16:35,471 "We've gotta go get it." 519 00:16:35,645 --> 00:16:36,995 Like, right now. 520 00:16:37,169 --> 00:16:38,475 What are you guys talkin' about over there? 521 00:16:38,649 --> 00:16:39,955 We gotta get the old couch back. 522 00:16:40,129 --> 00:16:41,216 Oh, thank God. 523 00:16:41,390 --> 00:16:42,913 I don't know who I am on this couch. 524 00:16:43,088 --> 00:16:45,134 Yeah! I don't like who I am on this couch. 525 00:16:45,307 --> 00:16:47,005 What?! Oh, no, no, no! 526 00:16:47,179 --> 00:16:49,878 I wanted to keep the old couch, but you told me I was nuts! 527 00:16:50,052 --> 00:16:52,533 So we went through all this, and now you think it isn't nuts? 528 00:16:52,706 --> 00:16:54,230 It is pretty nuts, you guys. 529 00:16:54,403 --> 00:16:56,841 I know, okay? It's just, how can you not look 530 00:16:57,015 --> 00:16:59,844 at that stinky old couch out there and not want it inside? 531 00:17:00,019 --> 00:17:02,107 It's... it's one of us. 532 00:17:02,282 --> 00:17:04,284 Yeah! Old couch came out of Mom! 533 00:17:04,458 --> 00:17:06,807 So, you dolike the old couch? 534 00:17:06,981 --> 00:17:08,679 No! It's a gross, 535 00:17:08,853 --> 00:17:11,682 lumpy, dumpy monster, and-- aah! 536 00:17:11,855 --> 00:17:13,467 Let's just go get it, okay? 537 00:17:13,641 --> 00:17:14,858 Uh... all right. 538 00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:16,338 Let's go! Let's do it! 539 00:17:17,513 --> 00:17:18,428 Oh, my God, it's gone! 540 00:17:19,820 --> 00:17:21,039 LINDA, GENE, TINA and LOUISE: What?! 541 00:17:22,911 --> 00:17:25,044 Good news! Someone picked up the couch! 542 00:17:25,218 --> 00:17:27,567 No! No! No! 543 00:17:27,741 --> 00:17:29,830 You guys react weird to good news. GENE: Yes! 544 00:17:34,530 --> 00:17:36,837 Where the freak is our couch?!It was here just a second ago. 545 00:17:37,011 --> 00:17:39,013 Yeah, these guys came and got it. I would've told you, 546 00:17:39,188 --> 00:17:41,451 but I didn't want to interrupt your time with the new couch. 547 00:17:41,625 --> 00:17:43,236 Those first moments of bonding are so important. 548 00:17:43,410 --> 00:17:44,672 Who was it?Some teenage boys. 549 00:17:44,846 --> 00:17:45,890 They were in a band. 550 00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:47,457 Exchange me for the couch. 551 00:17:47,631 --> 00:17:48,414 I'm willing to make that sacrifice. 552 00:17:48,588 --> 00:17:50,242 No, Tina.A band?! 553 00:17:50,416 --> 00:17:51,721 Why did they want our couch? 554 00:17:51,895 --> 00:17:53,159 Probably to sit on. Lazy band. 555 00:17:53,333 --> 00:17:54,682 They invited me to their show. 556 00:17:54,855 --> 00:17:56,204 It's next Friday at the Ear Drum. 557 00:17:56,378 --> 00:17:58,250 I haven't been to a rock show in a while. 558 00:17:58,424 --> 00:18:00,035 What do I wear? Are sleeveless shirts still cool? 559 00:18:00,209 --> 00:18:01,731 We've got to go to the Ear Drum 560 00:18:01,905 --> 00:18:03,385 and see if anyone knows how to find these guys. 561 00:18:03,559 --> 00:18:05,736 Yeah.Or we could just go back upstairs 562 00:18:05,910 --> 00:18:07,390 and think about all the good times we had with the... 563 00:18:07,564 --> 00:18:09,087 Come on, we're going! Let's go!Mm-hmm. 564 00:18:09,261 --> 00:18:11,394 Yeah, scope it out. Pay attention to the shirts. 565 00:18:11,567 --> 00:18:14,048 Sleeves? No sleeves? Let me know! 566 00:18:15,397 --> 00:18:16,573 It's four teenage boys. 567 00:18:16,747 --> 00:18:17,704 They're playing here next Friday. 568 00:18:17,878 --> 00:18:19,184 Oh, I know those guys. 569 00:18:19,358 --> 00:18:20,750 Yeah, w-what do they call themselves now? 570 00:18:20,924 --> 00:18:22,230 They're-they're always changing their name. 571 00:18:22,404 --> 00:18:23,928 Uh, used to be the Melon Smashers. 572 00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:25,278 Then they were the Vase Breakers. 573 00:18:25,451 --> 00:18:26,931 Now they're called, um... 574 00:18:27,105 --> 00:18:28,367 oh, yeah, yeah, the Couch Burners. 575 00:18:28,541 --> 00:18:29,759 Aah! Aah! Aah! 576 00:18:29,933 --> 00:18:31,632 Oh, God.The Couch Burners? 577 00:18:31,806 --> 00:18:34,287 Those idiots are gonna burn our couch and put it on their flyer! 578 00:18:34,461 --> 00:18:35,983 Oh, they got your couch, huh? 579 00:18:36,157 --> 00:18:37,637 Well, why'd you give your couch to the Couch Burners? 580 00:18:37,811 --> 00:18:39,248 Look: on both flyers, 581 00:18:39,422 --> 00:18:40,902 they're standing on the railroad tracks. 582 00:18:41,076 --> 00:18:42,469 BOB: Hey, that's the old train depot. 583 00:18:42,643 --> 00:18:44,123 You'rean old train depot! 584 00:18:44,297 --> 00:18:46,211 Come on, people. We got a couch to save. 585 00:18:46,385 --> 00:18:48,083 [lighter clicks open] 586 00:18:48,257 --> 00:18:49,692 After we get the shot we're gonna use, 587 00:18:49,866 --> 00:18:51,130 we should get one silly one, just for sillies. 588 00:18:51,304 --> 00:18:52,608 Oh, sure, yeah. 589 00:18:52,782 --> 00:18:53,914 There they are! 590 00:18:54,088 --> 00:18:55,263 Bunch of sick sofa psychos! 591 00:18:55,438 --> 00:18:56,656 And there's the couch! 592 00:18:56,830 --> 00:18:58,397 Get 'em, Dad!Run, Bobby! 593 00:18:58,572 --> 00:19:00,616 Why do I have to...? Oh, fine. 594 00:19:00,790 --> 00:19:03,142 [wheezing] 595 00:19:04,403 --> 00:19:06,144 Excuse me! Hey! 596 00:19:06,318 --> 00:19:07,971 Dude, are you okay? 597 00:19:08,146 --> 00:19:09,451 Yeah, I'm fine, I just... 598 00:19:09,625 --> 00:19:11,801 Uh, are you the, uh, Couch Burners? 599 00:19:11,976 --> 00:19:13,673 Oh, my God, have you heard of us? 600 00:19:13,847 --> 00:19:16,285 Uh, I'm really sorry to do this, but we need that couch back. 601 00:19:16,459 --> 00:19:18,156 It's ours, and you're notgonna burn it! 602 00:19:18,330 --> 00:19:20,159 We found this thing on the street. 603 00:19:20,333 --> 00:19:22,377 Finders, keepers. Keepers, burners. 604 00:19:22,551 --> 00:19:24,597 It's gonna be immortalized on our new flyer, so... 605 00:19:24,771 --> 00:19:26,382 you're welcome.Ha. 606 00:19:26,556 --> 00:19:28,644 Listen, the couch has been in the family a long time. 607 00:19:28,818 --> 00:19:30,038 Please give it back to us. 608 00:19:30,211 --> 00:19:31,647 Sir, I get it. You love the couch. 609 00:19:31,821 --> 00:19:33,606 Yes, we do. 610 00:19:33,780 --> 00:19:36,000 But if you love something, set it on fire. 611 00:19:36,174 --> 00:19:37,653 Those are good lyrics, man. 612 00:19:37,827 --> 00:19:39,265 I know, right? 613 00:19:39,439 --> 00:19:40,788 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! No! 614 00:19:40,961 --> 00:19:43,182 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! 615 00:19:43,355 --> 00:19:45,314 What if we could get you a different couch to burn, huh? 616 00:19:45,488 --> 00:19:47,055 Yeah, yeah! A buh-buh better couch! 617 00:19:47,229 --> 00:19:50,666 Linda, you're not talking about the new couch? Why not? 618 00:19:50,840 --> 00:19:52,016 Yeah, Dad, why not? 619 00:19:52,191 --> 00:19:53,844 'Cause it cost $499.99. 620 00:19:54,018 --> 00:19:55,672 It's a floor model. We can't return it! 621 00:19:55,846 --> 00:19:57,326 Yeah, Bob. What did you think we were gonna do with it 622 00:19:57,500 --> 00:19:59,240 when we took the old one back? 623 00:19:59,414 --> 00:20:01,982 I was imagining we'd prop one couch up on the other one, 624 00:20:02,156 --> 00:20:03,810 so it looked like they were making love. 625 00:20:03,984 --> 00:20:05,290 Aw. Mmm! 626 00:20:05,464 --> 00:20:07,249 Well, we could sell it. 627 00:20:07,423 --> 00:20:09,556 Damn it, Dad! Do you want the old couch back or don't you?! 628 00:20:09,730 --> 00:20:11,122 [sighs] Okay, fine. 629 00:20:11,297 --> 00:20:13,037 Wait, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on a second. 630 00:20:13,211 --> 00:20:14,691 We don't know anything about this new couch. 631 00:20:14,865 --> 00:20:16,519 Yeah!What's going on there? 632 00:20:16,692 --> 00:20:18,041 Well, what do you need to know? 633 00:20:18,217 --> 00:20:20,306 Well, like, can you burn it? 634 00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:22,351 Um, yeah, you can. 635 00:20:22,525 --> 00:20:24,222 Okay, we'll take it! 636 00:20:24,396 --> 00:20:25,354 [flames crackling, camera shutter clicks] 637 00:20:25,528 --> 00:20:26,355 All right, guys, one more. 638 00:20:26,528 --> 00:20:27,442 [camera shutter clicks] 639 00:20:27,616 --> 00:20:28,401 No, you had your eyes closed 640 00:20:28,575 --> 00:20:30,271 again, so... one more. 641 00:20:30,445 --> 00:20:33,101 Here we go.All right, eyes are still closed, so... 642 00:20:33,275 --> 00:20:34,711 I... Still?Yeah, just open them. You had them closed. 643 00:20:34,884 --> 00:20:36,451 I so feel like my eyes are open. 644 00:20:36,625 --> 00:20:38,237 Open your eyes and let me take this. All right. 645 00:20:38,411 --> 00:20:40,368 [camera shutter clicks]All of you, closed. 646 00:20:40,542 --> 00:20:42,632 Okay, we both...Guys, we got to take it while it's still burning. 647 00:20:42,806 --> 00:20:45,026 If you put one foot in front of the other, you'll look thinner. 648 00:20:45,200 --> 00:20:47,462 Yeah, that's perfect. 649 00:20:47,636 --> 00:20:50,074 BOB: Ugh.We got the couch back, Mom. We did it. 650 00:20:50,249 --> 00:20:52,685 Yup. Who knows a good upholsterer? Anyone? 651 00:20:52,859 --> 00:20:54,209 I do know a good upholsterer. 652 00:20:54,383 --> 00:20:56,037 He's on Cape Cod! 653 00:20:56,211 --> 00:20:58,038 Quick fort while we're waiting for new couch to burn? 654 00:20:58,212 --> 00:21:01,085 Sure!Dibs on the spot that smells like guacamole! 655 00:21:01,259 --> 00:21:02,565 SINGER [speaking]: ♪ If you love something ♪ 656 00:21:02,739 --> 00:21:05,873 ♪ Set it on fire ♪ 657 00:21:06,047 --> 00:21:08,441 ♪ Like a couch ♪ 658 00:21:08,615 --> 00:21:09,920 ♪ Or your shoes ♪ 659 00:21:10,094 --> 00:21:11,878 LINDA: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! 660 00:21:12,053 --> 00:21:13,881 BAND [singing]: ♪ If you love something ♪ 661 00:21:14,055 --> 00:21:16,710 ♪ Set it on fire ♪ 662 00:21:16,884 --> 00:21:18,580 ♪ If you love something ♪ 663 00:21:18,755 --> 00:21:22,105 ♪ Set it on fire ♪ 664 00:21:22,280 --> 00:21:24,457 SINGER [speaking]: ♪ If you love something ♪ 665 00:21:24,631 --> 00:21:26,588 ♪ Set it on fire ♪ 666 00:21:26,762 --> 00:21:29,375 BAND [singing]: ♪ But safety first! ♪ 667 00:21:29,548 --> 00:21:31,246 ♪ Safety first! ♪