1 00:00:20,846 --> 00:00:22,978 [ Bell Rings ]I'm back! 2 00:00:23,065 --> 00:00:26,852 -What's all this? -We're renting out rooms in our apartment for the long weekend. 3 00:00:26,939 --> 00:00:30,768 We're gonna be a bed-and-breakfast! It's so exciting! 4 00:00:30,856 --> 00:00:33,076 I love bed-and-breakfasts. They're so quaint. 5 00:00:33,162 --> 00:00:37,515 Aren't they? Random strangers shedding skin cells all over the house. 6 00:00:37,601 --> 00:00:40,735 Yech. Well, I'm against this bed-and-breakfast as much as you can be against something... 7 00:00:40,823 --> 00:00:43,433 and still let it happen. 8 00:00:43,521 --> 00:00:46,045 Like when my ex-wife wanted to have a three-way with our neighbor Ray. 9 00:00:46,133 --> 00:00:48,786 Teddy, Teddy, I don't think you should be talking about-- 10 00:00:48,874 --> 00:00:52,268 Wait, you had a three-way with Ray, the guy who wears the seal suit down on the pier? 11 00:00:52,356 --> 00:00:55,924 Yeah. I mean, I wasn't involved, I just watched, but... yeah. 12 00:00:56,012 --> 00:00:58,622 I had a three-way in science class yesterday. 13 00:00:58,710 --> 00:01:01,756 Tammy's lab partner was absent, so she joined in with me and Joey. 14 00:01:01,844 --> 00:01:03,846 It was fun.Okay, enough. 15 00:01:03,932 --> 00:01:08,545 Doilies, soapies, extra-expensive toilet paper. 16 00:01:08,632 --> 00:01:11,593 I love that soft stuff.I thought we were doing this to make extra money. 17 00:01:11,680 --> 00:01:14,335 Isn't all this eating into our profits?Don't worry, Bob. 18 00:01:14,421 --> 00:01:16,728 It's gonna be money and online reviews. 19 00:01:16,814 --> 00:01:19,426 And when I die and I get to heaven, God's gonna say, 20 00:01:19,513 --> 00:01:22,516 "Hey, aren't you the lady that ran that B and B I heard about?" 21 00:01:22,603 --> 00:01:25,432 And I'm gonna say, "Yes, God. What can I get you?" 22 00:01:25,519 --> 00:01:26,912 Here, hold this. 23 00:01:29,001 --> 00:01:32,569 [ Sniffs ] Mmm! Smell! Mmm, smell it! 24 00:01:32,656 --> 00:01:34,658 Lin, you're shoving things in my nose. 25 00:01:34,746 --> 00:01:37,575 Smell this one, though.You always do this, Lin. 26 00:01:37,662 --> 00:01:41,057 Whenever you entertain, you put way too much effort into it and drive yourself crazy. 27 00:01:41,144 --> 00:01:42,623 What are you talking about? 28 00:01:42,710 --> 00:01:44,887 I'm a wonderful hostess. 29 00:01:44,973 --> 00:01:48,629 No, Linda, you go overboard. And then if people aren't appreciative enough, you snap. 30 00:01:48,716 --> 00:01:50,371 That's not true! 31 00:01:50,457 --> 00:01:53,634 I'm a gifted hostess, and I'm ready to go pro. 32 00:01:53,722 --> 00:01:56,332 It is really soft.Put it back on the roll, please. 33 00:01:56,420 --> 00:01:58,770 Or, Mom, what if we just put Tina by the toilet? 34 00:01:58,856 --> 00:02:00,772 Yeah!I don't mind. 35 00:02:02,599 --> 00:02:05,429 Almost check-in time! 36 00:02:05,516 --> 00:02:08,258 Tina, Gene, are your rooms guest-ready? 37 00:02:08,344 --> 00:02:10,086 Yes.Subjective. 38 00:02:10,173 --> 00:02:13,263 Ha-ha! Remember when you made fun of me for moving into a closet? 39 00:02:13,349 --> 00:02:16,658 Well, now you suckers have to give up your room and I don't.[ Doorbell Rings ] 40 00:02:16,745 --> 00:02:19,616 Wooh-ooh, a guest! 41 00:02:19,704 --> 00:02:22,185 Javee is a entomologist. 42 00:02:22,271 --> 00:02:23,533 - Javed. - What? 43 00:02:23,621 --> 00:02:25,884 - My name is Javed. - All right. 44 00:02:25,971 --> 00:02:28,365 What kind of doctor is an entomologist again? 45 00:02:28,451 --> 00:02:30,497 Glands? Butt? 46 00:02:30,585 --> 00:02:33,587 [ Chuckles ] I'm not a butt doctor. I study insects. 47 00:02:33,675 --> 00:02:36,460 Specifically, the mating habits of myfungal beetles. 48 00:02:36,546 --> 00:02:38,506 Oh. So what brings you here? 49 00:02:38,593 --> 00:02:40,942 Myfungal beetles feed on fungus, 50 00:02:41,030 --> 00:02:44,206 and this town has a very, very high potency of fungus. 51 00:02:44,293 --> 00:02:46,165 Uh, that's actually our town motto. 52 00:02:46,252 --> 00:02:47,602 Fungus town! 53 00:02:47,688 --> 00:02:49,820 Tina, why don't you show Javeed-- 54 00:02:49,908 --> 00:02:51,170 Javed.his room... 55 00:02:51,258 --> 00:02:52,606 Jav-ed?Javed. 56 00:02:52,694 --> 00:02:55,000 You'll be in the Equestrian Suite. 57 00:02:55,086 --> 00:02:56,959 Huh?Okay. 58 00:02:57,045 --> 00:03:00,266 That's great. He brought a bug in a jar into our house. 59 00:03:00,354 --> 00:03:01,919 Don't be racist. 60 00:03:02,007 --> 00:03:04,532 I decorated it myself.You... 61 00:03:04,618 --> 00:03:07,187 like horses a lot. 62 00:03:07,274 --> 00:03:09,449 You like jars. 63 00:03:09,537 --> 00:03:13,104 These are specimen jars. I intend to mate the queen with a male and preserve her eggs. 64 00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:15,629 You mean you're gonna watch beetles have sex with each other? 65 00:03:15,717 --> 00:03:18,328 Mm-hmm.Cool. What's that for? 66 00:03:18,414 --> 00:03:20,983 Ooh, this is a synthetic pheromone. 67 00:03:21,069 --> 00:03:24,159 It's similar to what the queen emits when she wants to attract males. 68 00:03:24,247 --> 00:03:25,856 Does it work on human boys? 69 00:03:25,943 --> 00:03:28,033 Oh, no. Well, maybe. 70 00:03:28,120 --> 00:03:31,646 Ahh. [ Coughs ] 71 00:03:31,733 --> 00:03:33,343 May I store these in the bathroom? 72 00:03:33,430 --> 00:03:34,953 Sure. Everyone would love that. 73 00:03:35,039 --> 00:03:37,651 - [ Rings ] - More guests! 74 00:03:37,739 --> 00:03:39,783 Welcome! 75 00:03:39,871 --> 00:03:42,003 You must be Ed and Nora Samuels. 76 00:03:42,091 --> 00:03:43,614 Yes. Hello.Hi. 77 00:03:43,700 --> 00:03:46,269 Come on. I'll give you the tour. Okay, this is the salon. 78 00:03:46,355 --> 00:03:49,359 This is where we're gonna have the meet-and-greet, and you're just in time. 79 00:03:49,445 --> 00:03:51,969 Uh--Actually, we'd just like to go to our room, if that's okay? 80 00:03:52,057 --> 00:03:53,406 Right. We'd just like to get settled. 81 00:03:53,493 --> 00:03:54,973 What? Why? 82 00:03:55,060 --> 00:03:56,974 Stay here for the meet-and-greet. 83 00:03:57,062 --> 00:03:59,760 Maybe we'll come back out in a bit.No, stay. 84 00:03:59,848 --> 00:04:02,676 It's gonna be fun. Tina, get Javeed! 85 00:04:02,764 --> 00:04:04,939 - I think he's napping. - Wake him up! 86 00:04:05,026 --> 00:04:09,117 So, let's go around and we'll, um-- we'll play a little game. 87 00:04:09,205 --> 00:04:14,341 Let's say what our most embarrassing moment was. Who wants to go? 88 00:04:14,427 --> 00:04:16,081 I'll go. 89 00:04:16,168 --> 00:04:18,822 One time, I coughed at Communion... 90 00:04:18,910 --> 00:04:22,740 and the wafer flew right out of my mouth and it landed on my boob! 91 00:04:22,826 --> 00:04:25,264 Who wants to go next? Javed? 92 00:04:25,351 --> 00:04:28,223 I'll take a pass. Get me on the next one. 93 00:04:28,310 --> 00:04:29,964 What about when Dad got a perm? 94 00:04:30,052 --> 00:04:32,314 It wasn't a perm. It was a body wave. 95 00:04:32,401 --> 00:04:34,622 You looked like Barbra Streisand in The Main Event. 96 00:04:34,709 --> 00:04:37,928 You looked like Barbra Streisand's pubes.I did. 97 00:04:38,016 --> 00:04:41,716 How about how Dad says "gracias" in Mexican restaurants? That's embarrassing. 98 00:04:41,802 --> 00:04:44,805 Remember the time you asked me to check your prostate and you made a poopie? 99 00:04:44,893 --> 00:04:47,764 - Linda! - Oh, remember when Dad tried to go jogging? 100 00:04:47,851 --> 00:04:51,072 [ All Laughing ] 101 00:04:51,159 --> 00:04:52,682 Oh, come on! 102 00:04:52,769 --> 00:04:54,946 What about when Dad cried at the end of About Schmidt? 103 00:04:55,033 --> 00:04:57,297 - Gene, why are you in your underwear? - I was eating. 104 00:04:57,384 --> 00:04:59,908 What? You want me to get butter all over my clothes? 105 00:04:59,995 --> 00:05:02,519 Yeah. Now we just take him out back and hose him off. 106 00:05:02,605 --> 00:05:04,651 You're a doctor. Is this a mole? 107 00:05:04,738 --> 00:05:06,435 I'm not a doctor. And that's a raisin. 108 00:05:06,523 --> 00:05:09,221 Oh. Edible mole. 109 00:05:09,309 --> 00:05:11,745 All right, let's let someone else go. 110 00:05:11,833 --> 00:05:15,879 Samuels, how about you? What's your most embarrassing moment? 111 00:05:15,966 --> 00:05:18,795 I don't know. This?Yeah, definitely this. 112 00:05:18,882 --> 00:05:20,014 Hmm. 113 00:05:20,101 --> 00:05:22,233 [ Clears Throat ]Are we done? 114 00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:24,540 Yes, I guess we are done, Nora. 115 00:05:24,627 --> 00:05:27,064 Are you sure there aren't any rooms available anywhere else? 116 00:05:27,151 --> 00:05:29,197 No, everything's booked. I checked. 117 00:05:29,285 --> 00:05:31,069 Ooh, hello.Hmm. 118 00:05:31,156 --> 00:05:34,420 I'm cold. My nipples are so pointy! 119 00:05:34,507 --> 00:05:37,031 Ding-dong! It's for you.Mm-mmm. Mm-mmm. 120 00:05:37,119 --> 00:05:38,990 Mm-hmm.Mm-mmm. 121 00:05:39,076 --> 00:05:41,209 It might be a package. You should answer it. 122 00:05:45,432 --> 00:05:47,346 ♪♪ [ Scatting ] 123 00:05:49,697 --> 00:05:52,569 Ecch!Lin, stop stewing and go to sleep. 124 00:05:52,656 --> 00:05:55,832 I can't help it, Bob! Our guests are such party poopers. 125 00:05:55,920 --> 00:05:59,096 All of 'em! No one has any B and B spirit at all! 126 00:05:59,183 --> 00:06:02,057 [ Sighs ] Okay, just go to sleep, all right? 127 00:06:02,144 --> 00:06:04,711 You'll feel better in the morning.Fine! 128 00:06:04,798 --> 00:06:08,454 Gene. Gene, your foot is down the back of my underwear. 129 00:06:08,541 --> 00:06:10,673 It's warm down there. My feet are cold. 130 00:06:10,761 --> 00:06:12,850 Yes, but it's my ass.Mmm. 131 00:06:12,937 --> 00:06:15,636 Dad, are you still awake?Yes, Tina. 132 00:06:15,723 --> 00:06:18,028 I was just talking to Gene, right? A second ago? 133 00:06:18,115 --> 00:06:20,466 Do you think horses get songs stuck in their heads? 134 00:06:20,553 --> 00:06:23,512 Oh, my God. I don't know. Tina, go to sleep. 135 00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:26,995 Dad, do you want any chicken? Don't tell anyone. There's just enough for the two of us. 136 00:06:27,081 --> 00:06:28,952 Just go to sleep, all of you. 137 00:06:29,040 --> 00:06:31,434 I'm glad our guests are comfortable, Linda, 'cause this is great! 138 00:06:31,521 --> 00:06:34,394 Oh! Our guests! They'll appreciate me. 139 00:06:34,480 --> 00:06:36,656 I'll just have to try harder next time. 140 00:06:36,744 --> 00:06:39,310 Hey! 141 00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:41,139 [ Whispering ] I've got a backup. 142 00:06:41,225 --> 00:06:43,314 I've never been so happy to be at work. 143 00:06:43,403 --> 00:06:45,274 Yeah, you opened early today, huh, Bob? 144 00:06:45,360 --> 00:06:47,798 Well, there was a line to get into the bathroom up in the apartment, 145 00:06:47,884 --> 00:06:51,105 so I came down here to do my morning routine in the slop sink. 146 00:06:51,192 --> 00:06:52,411 ♪♪ [ Humming ] 147 00:06:54,543 --> 00:06:57,504 ♪♪ [ Humming ] 148 00:06:57,591 --> 00:06:58,983 Whoo! [ Chuckles ] 149 00:06:59,069 --> 00:07:00,593 Whoo! 150 00:07:00,680 --> 00:07:03,247 Bob, do we have any toothpicks down here? 151 00:07:03,334 --> 00:07:05,120 Yeah, over there.Pretty ones? 152 00:07:05,206 --> 00:07:08,079 What do you mean, pretty ones, Lin?The nice ones. 153 00:07:08,165 --> 00:07:11,995 How's the B and B going, Linda?Oh, it's great! Why? What'd you hear? 154 00:07:12,083 --> 00:07:15,346 What? Nothing. I bet it's magical up there. I picture it like England. 155 00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:17,610 It is, Teddy. It is. 156 00:07:17,697 --> 00:07:21,528 But do they appreciate it? Holed up in their rooms like dirty little gophers? 157 00:07:21,615 --> 00:07:24,747 Why come to a B and B if you're not gonna participate, you know?Oh, they're so ungrateful! 158 00:07:24,834 --> 00:07:26,750 I wish I was staying at your B and B. 159 00:07:26,836 --> 00:07:31,101 I'd sit in the parlor. And maybe I'd have a little wine, play some board games. 160 00:07:31,189 --> 00:07:33,887 Yes! Wine! Games! 161 00:07:33,975 --> 00:07:36,411 - Teddy, you should stay here. - What? 162 00:07:36,499 --> 00:07:38,632 You should. You're the dream guest.Really? 163 00:07:38,718 --> 00:07:40,850 You're the one I'm looking for.Do you have any vacancies? 164 00:07:40,937 --> 00:07:42,896 Yes! Louise's room! 165 00:07:42,983 --> 00:07:45,552 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Linda, Louise's room? She'd murder us. 166 00:07:45,639 --> 00:07:48,076 She's a big girl. She'll get over it. 167 00:07:48,163 --> 00:07:51,644 Linda, she won't get over it. When you vacuumed in there, she wouldn't talk to you for a week. 168 00:07:51,731 --> 00:07:53,646 Plus, it's not even a room. It's, like, a closet. 169 00:07:53,733 --> 00:07:55,430 That sounds perfect for me. I don't need a lot of room. 170 00:07:55,518 --> 00:07:57,127 I'll just bring, like, one outfit. 171 00:07:57,215 --> 00:08:00,348 Oh, I love it!I'll get my stuff. This is gonna be great. 172 00:08:00,435 --> 00:08:04,048 Well, have fun telling Louise you're kicking her out of her room, Lin. Wear a helmet. 173 00:08:04,134 --> 00:08:08,225 ♪♪ [ Humming ] 174 00:08:08,312 --> 00:08:10,271 What are you doing?Oh, hi, Louise. 175 00:08:10,358 --> 00:08:12,492 Oh, hi, Mom.Hello. 176 00:08:12,579 --> 00:08:14,798 You're holding my stuff.Hello, my little lady. 177 00:08:14,884 --> 00:08:17,322 Hello, Mom. What are you doing with my stuff? 178 00:08:17,408 --> 00:08:22,153 I was just welcoming our newest bed-and-breakfast guest into your room. 179 00:08:22,240 --> 00:08:23,720 Into my room? 180 00:08:23,807 --> 00:08:26,766 Say hello to Teddy![ Gasps ] 181 00:08:26,853 --> 00:08:29,117 Hi, Louise. You got wonderful stuff in here. 182 00:08:29,204 --> 00:08:31,336 I love, love, love it.What? 183 00:08:31,423 --> 00:08:33,381 Except for this little guy. He's kind of giving me the creeps. 184 00:08:33,469 --> 00:08:36,820 This isn't happening. Mother, this isn't happening, right? 185 00:08:36,907 --> 00:08:39,169 Has the world gone crazy? 186 00:08:39,256 --> 00:08:43,130 Okay, come on, Louise. Let's leave our guest alone. 187 00:08:43,217 --> 00:08:44,914 You mean your guest. 188 00:08:45,001 --> 00:08:47,264 'Cause I did not invite Teddy to come into my room... 189 00:08:47,351 --> 00:08:50,572 and move my stuff around!That's right. Come on. 190 00:08:50,659 --> 00:08:54,010 See you in a little bit at the wine-and-cheese mixer, Teddy. 191 00:08:54,097 --> 00:08:56,623 Sounds good, Linda.And I'll see you in hell, Teddy. 192 00:08:56,710 --> 00:09:00,148 - I'm sorry, Teddy. - I will see you in hell! 193 00:09:00,235 --> 00:09:03,455 Where are the Samuels? The cheese is getting sweaty. 194 00:09:03,543 --> 00:09:06,197 They're in their room. I think they're jumping on the bed. 195 00:09:06,283 --> 00:09:08,634 I heard the box spring going crazy. 196 00:09:08,721 --> 00:09:13,029 Sounds like they're "busy."They should be busy eating cheese and sipping wine. 197 00:09:13,116 --> 00:09:14,989 What do you mean, they're busy? Like, they got homework? 198 00:09:15,076 --> 00:09:16,773 No. They're-- It's-- 199 00:09:16,860 --> 00:09:19,297 Busy jumping? They can't take a jumping break? 200 00:09:19,384 --> 00:09:21,648 Ah, Javay! 201 00:09:21,735 --> 00:09:24,172 You came back for the wine and cheese! 202 00:09:24,259 --> 00:09:26,740 You got to catch up. Chug! Chug! Chug! 203 00:09:26,826 --> 00:09:28,784 Whoa, look at all those males. 204 00:09:28,871 --> 00:09:30,177 Yes, Tina! 205 00:09:30,264 --> 00:09:32,397 One of these lucky bugs will mate with the queen, 206 00:09:32,484 --> 00:09:33,834 and then she will bite off his head. 207 00:09:33,921 --> 00:09:35,269 So romantic. 208 00:09:35,356 --> 00:09:37,140 Cheese?No, thank you. 209 00:09:37,227 --> 00:09:38,577 Eat it.Mm-mmm. 210 00:09:38,664 --> 00:09:40,317 Ah, have some.Mm-mmm. Mm-mmm. 211 00:09:40,404 --> 00:09:42,145 Open your mouth. Open the mouth.Mmm, mmm. 212 00:09:42,232 --> 00:09:44,801 Just try it. You're gonna love it. You're gonna love it. 213 00:09:44,888 --> 00:09:47,760 - It's really good. - Gene, you're over your limit! 214 00:09:47,847 --> 00:09:50,501 Well, I hate to miss wine and cheese, 215 00:09:50,590 --> 00:09:54,549 but it's time for these little fellas to meet their mate. [ Chuckles ] 216 00:09:54,636 --> 00:09:56,943 Bye-bye.Wait. I want to watch. 217 00:09:57,030 --> 00:09:59,773 Well, I'll tell you, Linda, I'm having the time of my life. 218 00:09:59,860 --> 00:10:01,513 You're not gonna hear me whining about it. 219 00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:05,342 Hey, "whine."[ Laughs ] 220 00:10:05,429 --> 00:10:08,476 Everyone should be here for this! They don't know what they're missing! 221 00:10:08,563 --> 00:10:10,783 [ All Laughing ] 222 00:10:10,870 --> 00:10:13,613 I heard the... joke from the... hallway. 223 00:10:13,700 --> 00:10:15,091 Do you like that, Louise?Yeah. 224 00:10:15,178 --> 00:10:17,572 Oh, it was really funny! 225 00:10:17,659 --> 00:10:20,750 [ Laughs ] Get out of my room. 226 00:10:20,836 --> 00:10:23,404 I'm your guest in your room. Did you talk to your mommy? 227 00:10:23,491 --> 00:10:26,321 It's not my mommy's room. It's my room. 228 00:10:26,408 --> 00:10:30,977 No, I know, and I paid $75, and I'm just going to stay in your room for a couple of nights. 229 00:10:31,065 --> 00:10:33,414 - Louise, put some cheese in your mouth. - Mmm. 230 00:10:33,501 --> 00:10:35,068 Mmm, isn't that delicious? 231 00:10:35,155 --> 00:10:37,898 Yeah, it really goes down easy, doesn't it, Teddy? 232 00:10:37,985 --> 00:10:39,463 Ow. [ Chuckles ] 233 00:10:39,551 --> 00:10:42,642 Just so you know, Teddy, you have one hour, then I get real. 234 00:10:44,947 --> 00:10:47,298 If I were a pheromone, where would I be? 235 00:10:48,081 --> 00:10:49,692 Aha! 236 00:10:55,741 --> 00:10:57,307 [ Evil Laugh ] 237 00:10:57,394 --> 00:11:01,138 [ Coughs ] 238 00:11:01,225 --> 00:11:03,663 Ohh! Ohh! 239 00:11:06,274 --> 00:11:09,058 Good night, Javee! 240 00:11:09,145 --> 00:11:12,453 Oh! Uh, good night. [ Chuckles ] 241 00:11:12,541 --> 00:11:14,847 Crazy lady. She's a nut. Am I right? 242 00:11:16,326 --> 00:11:17,414 Oh, you're bad! 243 00:11:19,155 --> 00:11:22,072 - Good night, Teddy. - Good night, Linda. 244 00:11:22,158 --> 00:11:24,509 Sleep tight.Sleep tighter, Lin. 245 00:11:24,596 --> 00:11:26,773 Don't let the bed bugs bite. 246 00:11:26,860 --> 00:11:29,471 I won't. Hey, my pillow smells funny. 247 00:11:29,557 --> 00:11:31,385 Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. 248 00:11:31,472 --> 00:11:34,955 Good night, Samuels! 249 00:11:35,042 --> 00:11:37,522 - Oh, woo! Oh, my God! - [ Linda ] Oh, God! 250 00:11:37,609 --> 00:11:40,003 - Could you please close the door? - Yeah. Oh, my God. 251 00:11:40,090 --> 00:11:42,048 - Sorry. - No. With you on the other side of it. 252 00:11:42,135 --> 00:11:44,355 - Okay. All right. All right. - Leave! 253 00:11:44,442 --> 00:11:46,706 Why is Mr. Samuels wearing handcuffs? 254 00:11:46,793 --> 00:11:49,490 They are-- They are escape artists. 255 00:11:49,577 --> 00:11:51,100 [ Gasps ] They are? 256 00:11:51,187 --> 00:11:54,538 Yes. Isn't that interesting? Okay, time for bed. Let's go. 257 00:11:54,625 --> 00:11:57,368 All right, Louise, since you're new here, I'll show you the ropes. 258 00:11:57,455 --> 00:11:59,283 That corner of the bed is for eating. 259 00:11:59,370 --> 00:12:01,328 And this right here is the exercise area. 260 00:12:01,416 --> 00:12:04,941 This is where I thrash. [ Groaning ] 261 00:12:05,028 --> 00:12:07,248 Yeah. I'll stand, thank you very much. 262 00:12:07,335 --> 00:12:08,902 [ Groaning ] 263 00:12:13,427 --> 00:12:15,168 [ Snoring ][ Groaning ] 264 00:12:15,255 --> 00:12:16,822 Here we go. 265 00:12:19,650 --> 00:12:22,653 Have you talked to your mommy? 266 00:12:22,741 --> 00:12:27,006 Why don't you talk to yourmommy, Teddy, about your new roommates? 267 00:12:34,927 --> 00:12:36,625 Where is everybody? 268 00:12:36,711 --> 00:12:39,062 Careful, Bob. I reused the cheese from yesterday. 269 00:12:39,149 --> 00:12:42,283 - Some of the omelets have toothpicks in them. - Ow. Ow. Ah. 270 00:12:42,370 --> 00:12:46,765 Oh, good morning, Yavee! I hope you and your bugs are hungry. 271 00:12:46,852 --> 00:12:49,812 My appetite is gone, along with several of my specimen jars. 272 00:12:49,899 --> 00:12:52,032 They contained my most virile males. 273 00:12:52,119 --> 00:12:55,600 Oh, no.Little insects with wings. How far could they go? 274 00:12:55,687 --> 00:12:59,517 [ Teddy ] Hey, guys.[ All Screaming ] 275 00:12:59,604 --> 00:13:02,259 - What? Do I have bed head? - Oh, good God, Teddy. 276 00:13:02,346 --> 00:13:04,479 My beetles!Ohh! 277 00:13:04,566 --> 00:13:07,787 What?Teddy, you've got beetles all over your face. 278 00:13:07,874 --> 00:13:09,831 Is that right? I haven't looked in the mirror yet. 279 00:13:09,918 --> 00:13:12,052 These males are in an extremely amorous state. 280 00:13:12,139 --> 00:13:13,923 You mean, right now they're trying to mate with Teddy's face? 281 00:13:14,009 --> 00:13:15,620 - Yes. - Ahh. 282 00:13:15,706 --> 00:13:17,404 Oh, God, Ted. Does it hurt? 283 00:13:17,491 --> 00:13:19,320 Nope. Nope. Don't worry about it. 284 00:13:19,407 --> 00:13:22,845 Teddy, you should probably get to the hospital. You okay to drive? 285 00:13:22,932 --> 00:13:26,370 No, I don't need a hospital. I'll be fine. This is still a magical weekend. 286 00:13:26,456 --> 00:13:27,676 Ahh.You know? 287 00:13:27,763 --> 00:13:29,634 He's the perfect guest.What's for breakfast? 288 00:13:29,721 --> 00:13:32,942 - Eggs! - Ugh! Nothing gets to this guy. 289 00:13:33,028 --> 00:13:35,639 You! I don't know how, but you did this. 290 00:13:35,726 --> 00:13:37,163 [ Sniffs ] I know how she did it. 291 00:13:37,250 --> 00:13:39,165 She used my pheromones on him. 292 00:13:39,253 --> 00:13:42,168 Okay, well, uh, Linda, everyone, have fun in the B and B. 293 00:13:42,255 --> 00:13:43,865 I'll be downstairs in the restaurant. Bye. 294 00:13:43,952 --> 00:13:45,302 Bye, Dad.No! 295 00:13:45,389 --> 00:13:47,565 You deal with her! She's out of control! 296 00:13:47,652 --> 00:13:50,567 Okay. Uh, give her her room back.No! 297 00:13:50,654 --> 00:13:53,441 Well, that's all I got. Bye. 298 00:13:53,528 --> 00:13:56,573 Louise! You're grounded. Go to your room. 299 00:13:56,661 --> 00:13:58,446 Gladly. That's all I ever wanted. 300 00:13:58,533 --> 00:14:01,535 No, I mean my room. Go to my room. 301 00:14:01,623 --> 00:14:04,931 - You can't make me. - Oh, yes, I can, Miss Missy. 302 00:14:06,496 --> 00:14:08,456 I guess you can. 303 00:14:08,543 --> 00:14:11,067 I've never seen these beetles so aroused. 304 00:14:11,153 --> 00:14:12,981 I have that affect on beetles. [ Chuckles ] 305 00:14:13,068 --> 00:14:15,201 I haven't had this much action in a while. 306 00:14:15,288 --> 00:14:18,335 Are they gonna call me tomorrow? Probably not, right? That's okay. 307 00:14:18,422 --> 00:14:23,253 Teddy, making jokes, covered with bugs. You are a man! Damn you! 308 00:14:23,340 --> 00:14:24,951 [ Gene ] Does anything get to you? 309 00:14:25,038 --> 00:14:26,691 [ Teddy ] There's really only one thing. 310 00:14:26,778 --> 00:14:29,042 [ Gene, Tina ] Yeah?[ Teddy ] Costumed characters. 311 00:14:29,129 --> 00:14:30,956 You know, like the ones in amusement parks. 312 00:14:31,043 --> 00:14:32,480 Really?Why? 313 00:14:32,567 --> 00:14:35,221 It's the eyes, Gene. Their cold, dead eyes... 314 00:14:35,308 --> 00:14:37,832 watching you while they make love to your wife. 315 00:14:37,919 --> 00:14:41,880 - While they what? - I mean, when they, uh, go to birthday parties. 316 00:14:41,967 --> 00:14:43,056 [ Gene ] All right. 317 00:14:43,143 --> 00:14:44,665 Thank you, Teddy. 318 00:14:44,753 --> 00:14:48,844 Oh, thank you, Mom's purse. Well, thank you, phone. 319 00:14:48,931 --> 00:14:50,759 Yes, I will make a call. 320 00:14:50,846 --> 00:14:52,239 ♪♪ [ Whistling ] 321 00:14:52,326 --> 00:14:55,110 Oh, I gotcha. Oh, you're sizzling. 322 00:14:55,197 --> 00:14:56,851 I love your sounds. 323 00:14:56,938 --> 00:14:59,245 Oh, hello. You have costumed characters, right? 324 00:14:59,332 --> 00:15:00,986 ♪♪ [ Whistling ]Oh, that's great. 325 00:15:01,073 --> 00:15:04,033 I'll take the hippo, the fox.Here's a cookie. 326 00:15:04,120 --> 00:15:05,294 Here's a cookie.A baby bear. 327 00:15:05,381 --> 00:15:06,993 Here's a cookie.And do take a credit card? 328 00:15:07,080 --> 00:15:11,345 [ Knocking ]Brought you some cookies! What's going on here? 329 00:15:11,432 --> 00:15:14,260 - Uh, we have to go home. - What are you talking about? 330 00:15:14,347 --> 00:15:17,090 You can't leave. You're on vacation. 331 00:15:17,177 --> 00:15:22,355 Sit down, enjoy the cookies, unpack your pointy bra and your whip and whip him. 332 00:15:22,442 --> 00:15:24,139 He's a naughty boy. 333 00:15:24,226 --> 00:15:26,881 I'm a naughty boy.Get to it! 334 00:15:26,969 --> 00:15:29,231 Did you just lock the door? She just locked the door. 335 00:15:29,318 --> 00:15:30,972 I don't know what's going on. 336 00:15:31,059 --> 00:15:33,366 [ Linda ] You can come out when it's time for the ice cream social! 337 00:15:33,453 --> 00:15:35,195 You too! 338 00:15:35,282 --> 00:15:38,894 - Hey, there's my perfect guest. - Hey, Linda. 339 00:15:38,980 --> 00:15:45,292 I got good news. I'm upgrading you to platinum status! 340 00:15:45,379 --> 00:15:48,424 Oh! Platinum status. That sounds fancy. What do I get? 341 00:15:48,511 --> 00:15:51,645 It is! You hungry? You want some room service? 342 00:15:51,732 --> 00:15:54,562 No. Uh, I guess I can eat. 343 00:15:54,649 --> 00:15:56,999 What do you want?Uh, bacon burger? 344 00:15:57,086 --> 00:15:58,609 What?Bacon burger. 345 00:15:58,696 --> 00:16:00,133 Bacon--First-First word. 346 00:16:00,220 --> 00:16:01,785 Bacon.One syllable. 347 00:16:01,873 --> 00:16:03,614 No, two syllables.Two syllables. 348 00:16:03,701 --> 00:16:06,182 Oink, oink, oink, oink, oink, oink, oink, oink!Uh, a pig. 349 00:16:06,269 --> 00:16:07,618 Dinosaur.Bacon! 350 00:16:07,705 --> 00:16:09,316 Bacon burger.Kevin Bacon. 351 00:16:09,403 --> 00:16:10,881 Second word.Burger. 352 00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:12,971 Brake pads?[ Moos ] 353 00:16:13,058 --> 00:16:14,625 Dinosaur.Jurassic Park! 354 00:16:14,711 --> 00:16:16,149 [ Moos ]Charades! 355 00:16:16,235 --> 00:16:18,150 You can't guess charades.Yes, you can. 356 00:16:18,238 --> 00:16:19,847 Oh. Is it charades? 357 00:16:19,934 --> 00:16:22,764 [ Moos ]Cow. Burger! Bacon burger! 358 00:16:22,850 --> 00:16:25,505 All right. Yes. Bacon burger! All right. I can do that. 359 00:16:25,592 --> 00:16:28,682 [ Doorbell Rings ]Uh, doorbell. I'll get it. 360 00:16:28,769 --> 00:16:30,206 Oh, Footloose. 361 00:16:30,293 --> 00:16:32,600 Can I-- Can I help you? 362 00:16:32,687 --> 00:16:34,384 Is there a Teddy here? 363 00:16:34,471 --> 00:16:36,865 Teddy, you've got visitors. 364 00:16:36,951 --> 00:16:38,692 One second. 365 00:16:38,779 --> 00:16:41,913 We're the Fuzzy Buddies! Are you Teddy? 366 00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:44,090 [ Gasps ] What's going on here? 367 00:16:44,177 --> 00:16:45,481 [ Screams ] 368 00:16:48,658 --> 00:16:53,576 - Someone's excited to see the Fuzzy Buddies. - [ Screams ] 369 00:16:53,663 --> 00:16:54,796 Don't! No, no, no! 370 00:16:54,883 --> 00:16:57,232 Whoa. You're a big boy-- Ohh! 371 00:17:00,496 --> 00:17:03,586 [ Teddy Grunting ]Oh, my God! 372 00:17:03,673 --> 00:17:05,936 Teddy.Ohh! Ahh! 373 00:17:06,025 --> 00:17:09,897 [ Teddy Crying ] 374 00:17:09,984 --> 00:17:13,423 It's almost the ice cream social. 375 00:17:13,509 --> 00:17:16,991 Linda, what is going on up here? You're losing control of your B and B. 376 00:17:17,078 --> 00:17:20,691 What are you talking about? Everything is going perfectly. 377 00:17:20,778 --> 00:17:22,953 Right. Right, Lin. Everything's fine. 378 00:17:23,041 --> 00:17:24,826 Bob, do you have my bacon burger? 379 00:17:24,913 --> 00:17:27,567 Oh, yeah, the bacon burger. Here.Oh. 380 00:17:27,654 --> 00:17:30,048 Bob, can you help me? I can't chew. 381 00:17:30,135 --> 00:17:32,528 You need me to feed you?Yeah. 382 00:17:32,615 --> 00:17:34,965 Chew it up for him, like a mama bird. 383 00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:37,317 Linda, no!He's platinum status! 384 00:17:37,403 --> 00:17:39,840 You're crazy, Linda!It's all right, guys. I got it. 385 00:17:39,927 --> 00:17:41,190 Perfect guest. 386 00:17:44,627 --> 00:17:48,806 So let me get this straight. Teddy beat up a bunch of giant animals. 387 00:17:48,893 --> 00:17:52,983 You locked Louise in our room, and then you locked the guests in their rooms? 388 00:17:53,072 --> 00:17:56,814 They were gonna leave before the big ice cream social at 3:00. 389 00:17:56,901 --> 00:17:59,208 Lin, just give me the key, all right? I'm gonna let them out. 390 00:17:59,295 --> 00:18:00,775 No.Yes. 391 00:18:00,862 --> 00:18:03,125 No.Look at yourself. Look at what you've turned into! 392 00:18:04,344 --> 00:18:06,214 Oh, all right. 393 00:18:06,301 --> 00:18:09,740 All I wanted was a charming bed and breakfast, that's all. 394 00:18:09,826 --> 00:18:13,353 Now what am I gonna say to God when I go to heaven? 395 00:18:13,440 --> 00:18:16,877 Ohh! Oh! Uh-oh. I lost the key! 396 00:18:16,964 --> 00:18:19,576 Oh, my God, what have I done? 397 00:18:19,663 --> 00:18:21,143 All right, all right, listen. 398 00:18:21,230 --> 00:18:23,318 You know, Louise picks locks. 399 00:18:23,405 --> 00:18:26,757 - Louise hates me. - No, she doesn't hate you, Lin. 400 00:18:26,844 --> 00:18:30,065 I'm sure she's broken out of our room already.Oh. 401 00:18:32,546 --> 00:18:34,852 I'm gonna go deal with Teddy. Why don't you try her room? 402 00:18:34,939 --> 00:18:36,157 Okay. 403 00:18:37,898 --> 00:18:40,944 Hi, honey. It's Mommy. 404 00:18:41,031 --> 00:18:44,339 Oh, hello, Mother. Please do come in. 405 00:18:44,426 --> 00:18:48,431 Louise, I'm sorry I rented your room to Teddy and then locked you in our bedroom. 406 00:18:48,518 --> 00:18:50,606 I accept your apology, Mom. 407 00:18:50,693 --> 00:18:54,394 Who among us hasn't gone a little overboard from time to time? 408 00:18:54,480 --> 00:18:56,613 Ah, thanks, sweetie. 409 00:18:56,700 --> 00:18:59,442 And you're gonna apologize to Teddy.Okay. 410 00:18:59,528 --> 00:19:02,141 And there's something else I need from you. 411 00:19:02,228 --> 00:19:04,708 [ Sighs ] I would just cut it up right now. 412 00:19:04,795 --> 00:19:06,884 Oh. No, not that. 413 00:19:06,971 --> 00:19:10,452 Will you please help me get Javeed and the Samuels out of their rooms? 414 00:19:10,539 --> 00:19:13,194 I locked them in and I-- I kind of lost the key. 415 00:19:13,281 --> 00:19:15,458 There might be something I can do. 416 00:19:17,981 --> 00:19:21,160 Javeed, I'm sorry I locked you in your room. 417 00:19:21,247 --> 00:19:22,769 You're free to go if you wish. 418 00:19:22,856 --> 00:19:25,468 - You locked me in my room? - No. 419 00:19:25,555 --> 00:19:27,730 She's completely bonkers, isn't she? 420 00:19:27,817 --> 00:19:29,298 Look at me when I'm talking to you! 421 00:19:32,561 --> 00:19:35,391 They're gone. How did they get out of a locked room? 422 00:19:35,478 --> 00:19:37,349 It was their greatest escape. 423 00:19:40,308 --> 00:19:43,224 Look what they left behind. Look. My tongue is trapped. 424 00:19:43,311 --> 00:19:45,357 Now it's escaped. Now it's trapped. 425 00:19:45,444 --> 00:19:46,968 Now it's escaped.Hey, look! 426 00:19:47,055 --> 00:19:48,925 They're still climbing down. 427 00:19:49,012 --> 00:19:51,929 You two all right? You need any help with your bags? 428 00:19:52,016 --> 00:19:54,801 No. Uh, actually we're stuck.Please help us. 429 00:19:54,888 --> 00:19:56,759 I suppose we could get a ladder. 430 00:19:56,846 --> 00:19:59,546 How much did you like my B and B?A lot. 431 00:19:59,633 --> 00:20:02,243 Are you gonna recommend us to your friends?Yes! 432 00:20:02,330 --> 00:20:05,247 Are you gonna leave me your e-mail address?[ Both ] Yes! 433 00:20:05,334 --> 00:20:06,814 Get 'em the ladder. 434 00:20:07,944 --> 00:20:09,685 Uh, thanks for coming. Sorry. 435 00:20:09,772 --> 00:20:12,036 Sorry again. Uh, here's something for your trouble. 436 00:20:12,123 --> 00:20:14,038 Two dollars. Thanks a lot. 437 00:20:14,125 --> 00:20:17,390 I don't know what to tip in this situation.Yeah. Not two dollars. 438 00:20:17,477 --> 00:20:19,740 Oh, hey, Teddy. Uh, you all right? 439 00:20:19,826 --> 00:20:23,308 I think I worked through my issues, Bob. Me and the owl are gonna go get a drink. 440 00:20:23,395 --> 00:20:25,441 I'm pretty sure there's a woman inside. [ Chuckles ] 441 00:20:25,528 --> 00:20:27,574 That's a guy, Teddy.Oh, that's a woman. 442 00:20:27,661 --> 00:20:29,402 The owl was a guy.It's a woman. 443 00:20:29,489 --> 00:20:32,491 The fox was a girl.Oh. Did the fox leave already? 444 00:20:32,578 --> 00:20:36,670 Yes.Oh. Linda, you are a delightful hostess. 445 00:20:36,757 --> 00:20:40,151 Ah, thanks, Teddy.See you at lunch, Bob. 446 00:20:40,239 --> 00:20:44,460 Well, that was all right. It was pretty good. I give us a B. 447 00:20:44,547 --> 00:20:46,027 Mmm.B plus. 448 00:20:46,114 --> 00:20:48,115 Mmm.A B and B plus! 449 00:20:48,202 --> 00:20:50,770 My face is sweaty.Gene, take that off. 450 00:20:50,857 --> 00:20:52,424 Never! Ohh! 451 00:20:52,511 --> 00:20:58,038 [ Groaning ] 452 00:21:02,130 --> 00:21:07,048 [ Groaning Continues ]