1 00:00:02,839 --> 00:00:05,077 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:20,240 --> 00:00:22,679 The green ones taste like apple‐flavored paint, 3 00:00:22,746 --> 00:00:25,150 the purple ones taste like grape‐flavored hair spray. 4 00:00:25,217 --> 00:00:26,887 I love discount candy. Mmm. 5 00:00:26,954 --> 00:00:29,258 Gene, we're supposed to share the candy, remember? 6 00:00:29,325 --> 00:00:30,905 You're kind of eating it a little fast there, buddy. 7 00:00:30,929 --> 00:00:33,601 Yeah, but you're not eating it at all, like a sociopath. 8 00:00:33,668 --> 00:00:35,203 Because I'm saving mine for later. 9 00:00:35,270 --> 00:00:36,807 Wait, where'd my stash go? 10 00:00:36,874 --> 00:00:38,109 - Louise! - Tina, relax. 11 00:00:38,176 --> 00:00:40,715 I'm just storing it for you in my face. 12 00:00:40,782 --> 00:00:41,817 Ugh! Give me the bag. 13 00:00:41,884 --> 00:00:43,353 - Tina, no! - No! 14 00:00:43,420 --> 00:00:46,426 Hey, I told you kids you could have that bag of cheap candy 15 00:00:46,492 --> 00:00:48,239 as long as you shared it like civilized people. 16 00:00:48,263 --> 00:00:51,269 It's Gene's fault. He started double‐fisting it. 17 00:00:51,336 --> 00:00:53,674 But I only did that because I saw Tina hoarding it. 18 00:00:53,741 --> 00:00:56,112 It's hard to hoard when Louise keeps stealing from me. 19 00:00:56,179 --> 00:00:57,682 I mean, Lin, you did give three kids 20 00:00:57,749 --> 00:00:59,987 a giant bag of candy and said, "Go nuts." 21 00:01:00,053 --> 00:01:02,324 Yeah, go nuts, but don't start fighting 22 00:01:02,391 --> 00:01:04,195 like a bunch of Hunger Games. Gimme. 23 00:01:04,261 --> 00:01:05,621 - ALL: No! - You can have this back 24 00:01:05,665 --> 00:01:07,836 when you stop being Sour Patch poops. 25 00:01:07,902 --> 00:01:10,207 Good job, Tina. Now we have nothing to live for. 26 00:01:10,273 --> 00:01:12,545 Kids, come on, I‐I know sugar makes you all insane, 27 00:01:12,612 --> 00:01:15,718 but maybe try not to act like jerks toward each other? 28 00:01:15,785 --> 00:01:17,889 - What, Dad? I wasn't listening. - Yeah, me, neither. 29 00:01:17,956 --> 00:01:21,396 - I couldn't hear you over the sugar in my body. - I want candy. 30 00:01:21,462 --> 00:01:22,966 - Okay, forget it. - (fryer beeping) 31 00:01:23,033 --> 00:01:25,079 Will one of you kids take the basket out of the deep fryer? 32 00:01:25,103 --> 00:01:27,809 I made some fries 'cause I know Teddy will be here soon 33 00:01:27,876 --> 00:01:30,515 - and you know how he gets when he has to wait for fries. - On it. 34 00:01:30,581 --> 00:01:33,219 ♪ Fries are done, I'm a great son ♪ 35 00:01:33,286 --> 00:01:35,457 ♪ Fries are done, I'm a great son. ♪ 36 00:01:35,525 --> 00:01:37,361 Gene, you know you don't have to sing along 37 00:01:37,428 --> 00:01:39,733 with every sound in the world, right? 38 00:01:39,800 --> 00:01:41,002 I wish I didn't, Father. 39 00:01:41,069 --> 00:01:42,672 - Hey, Teddy. - Hi, everyone. 40 00:01:42,739 --> 00:01:44,676 - Uh, do I smell fries? - They're coming. 41 00:01:44,743 --> 00:01:46,747 They're coming. Soon, or, uh... 42 00:01:46,814 --> 00:01:48,651 Okay, I'm gonna go park the car real quick. 43 00:01:48,718 --> 00:01:50,621 - Can I come with you? - Yeah! - Me, too. 44 00:01:50,688 --> 00:01:51,933 You kids realize I'm just driving 45 00:01:51,957 --> 00:01:53,159 around the corner, right? 46 00:01:53,226 --> 00:01:54,696 We don't have a lot going on today. 47 00:01:54,763 --> 00:01:56,408 Yeah, that candy was kind of my whole schedule. 48 00:01:56,432 --> 00:01:58,971 Well, you could help me fill up these napkin holders. 49 00:01:59,038 --> 00:02:02,244 Mom, are you paying attention? Dad needs us to help him park. 50 00:02:02,311 --> 00:02:04,348 - Fine, go. - ALL: Yay! 51 00:02:04,415 --> 00:02:05,918 Hey, Andy. Hey, Ollie. 52 00:02:05,985 --> 00:02:07,689 We're playing outside today. 53 00:02:07,756 --> 00:02:10,728 That's a cantaloupe. Fruit can be heads. 54 00:02:10,795 --> 00:02:11,930 And vice versa. 55 00:02:11,997 --> 00:02:14,736 Okay. All right, Dad. Where are we really going? 56 00:02:14,803 --> 00:02:16,472 - Lake Titicaca! - Gene. 57 00:02:16,540 --> 00:02:18,511 - Vegas, baby. - I told you, we're just going 58 00:02:18,577 --> 00:02:20,648 to park the car around the block. Oh! 59 00:02:20,715 --> 00:02:22,786 - (all shout) - Is‐is everyone okay? 60 00:02:22,852 --> 00:02:23,852 - I'm good. - Me, too. 61 00:02:23,888 --> 00:02:25,056 I'm great. Again! 62 00:02:25,123 --> 00:02:26,927 Uh, it's just a little fender bender. 63 00:02:26,994 --> 00:02:28,296 We‐we just got hit from behind. 64 00:02:28,363 --> 00:02:30,400 Also, you hit someone in front of you, I think? 65 00:02:30,467 --> 00:02:32,337 LOUISE: And they hit someone in front of them. 66 00:02:32,404 --> 00:02:35,377 Okay, so, uh, it's, uh, a few fender benders. 67 00:02:35,443 --> 00:02:37,916 AKA a friender blender. 68 00:02:37,982 --> 00:02:39,519 My babies! My babies! 69 00:02:39,586 --> 00:02:41,800 Are you hurt? I knew I should have never let you get in cars. 70 00:02:41,824 --> 00:02:43,727 - E‐Everyone's okay. - JIMMY: Hey, Bob! 71 00:02:43,794 --> 00:02:46,199 I always knew you were a train wreck, but this? 72 00:02:46,265 --> 00:02:47,535 (laughs) Zoom! 73 00:02:47,602 --> 00:02:49,840 Good one, Jimmy. That was a funny comment to make. 74 00:02:49,906 --> 00:02:51,677 Trev, I told you, don't say, 75 00:02:51,743 --> 00:02:53,479 "That was a funny comment to make." 76 00:02:53,547 --> 00:02:55,217 - But it was. - So just laugh. 77 00:02:55,283 --> 00:02:56,553 I don't like my laugh. 78 00:02:56,620 --> 00:02:58,456 Oh, my gosh. What the heck just happened? 79 00:02:58,524 --> 00:03:00,327 Uh, you rear‐ended us. 80 00:03:00,393 --> 00:03:02,899 I got to call you back. I just got into an accident. 81 00:03:02,966 --> 00:03:04,235 No, no, baby's fine. 82 00:03:04,301 --> 00:03:06,105 - Oh, God, there's a baby in there? - (shushes) 83 00:03:06,172 --> 00:03:08,276 You're okay, baby. You're just scared, 84 00:03:08,343 --> 00:03:09,613 - that's all. - Oh. 85 00:03:09,679 --> 00:03:12,317 Well, that was a real bumper bummer. (chuckles) 86 00:03:12,384 --> 00:03:14,455 If you're wondering about my face, I'm a clown. 87 00:03:14,522 --> 00:03:16,325 That was gonna be my third guess. 88 00:03:16,392 --> 00:03:19,532 So, we should probably all exchange info, right? 89 00:03:19,599 --> 00:03:21,904 (belches) Sorry. When I get stressed, 90 00:03:21,970 --> 00:03:24,809 I burp. I just... (belches) I feel terrible. 91 00:03:24,876 --> 00:03:27,649 Look, I‐I'm sorry this happened, but you know, um, 92 00:03:27,715 --> 00:03:29,084 - people make mistakes. - (belches) 93 00:03:29,151 --> 00:03:30,797 I mean, if you need to sit down, get a glass of water, 94 00:03:30,821 --> 00:03:32,992 this is actually our restaurant right here. 95 00:03:33,059 --> 00:03:35,330 I... uh, I'm Bob, by the way. 96 00:03:35,397 --> 00:03:36,465 Bob Burger. 97 00:03:36,533 --> 00:03:38,269 And I'm his wife, Linda. Hi. 98 00:03:38,336 --> 00:03:40,473 Also we live here. Not in the restaurant. 99 00:03:40,541 --> 00:03:42,144 Upstairs. In our mansion. 100 00:03:42,210 --> 00:03:44,248 - I'm Elaine. - Graham. - I'm Patti. 101 00:03:44,315 --> 00:03:46,520 Seriously, though, you're all welcome to... 102 00:03:46,586 --> 00:03:48,022 And I'm Teddy. Bob's best friend. 103 00:03:48,089 --> 00:03:49,726 This is going great. (laughs) 104 00:03:49,793 --> 00:03:51,228 Bob, can I speak to you real quick? 105 00:03:51,295 --> 00:03:54,335 If I were you, I wouldn't be too chummy with these other drivers. 106 00:03:54,401 --> 00:03:56,773 I'm not being chummy. I'm just being friendly. 107 00:03:56,840 --> 00:03:58,677 Look, I think you should just call the police 108 00:03:58,744 --> 00:04:00,313 and make sure you cover your butt. 109 00:04:00,380 --> 00:04:02,460 I mean, I really don't think we need to call the police, Teddy. 110 00:04:02,484 --> 00:04:03,887 This seems pretty cut‐and‐dry. 111 00:04:03,954 --> 00:04:06,092 Bob, if there's one thing I know about accidents, 112 00:04:06,158 --> 00:04:07,962 it's that they are never cut‐and‐dry. 113 00:04:08,029 --> 00:04:11,402 - Trust me. I've been in 17 collisions. - You have? 114 00:04:11,469 --> 00:04:14,909 Yes. Hit by 21 cars in five states, not including Guam. 115 00:04:14,976 --> 00:04:17,682 - That's a lot. - And what I've learned is these accidents‐‐ 116 00:04:17,749 --> 00:04:19,427 they bring out the absolute worst in people. 117 00:04:19,451 --> 00:04:21,823 - Wait. When were you in Guam? - When I was in the Navy. 118 00:04:21,890 --> 00:04:23,594 Plus, I got a friend there named Tom. 119 00:04:23,660 --> 00:04:25,898 - I never told you about Guam Tom? - Mm, no. 120 00:04:25,965 --> 00:04:28,937 So, Patti, I‐I don't want to be that guy, 121 00:04:29,004 --> 00:04:30,908 but since you were the driver in the back, 122 00:04:30,975 --> 00:04:33,514 h‐how did you want to handle this, I‐insurance‐wise? 123 00:04:33,580 --> 00:04:36,419 Wait, you think this is my fault? 124 00:04:36,485 --> 00:04:39,358 Um, I mean, uh, who else's fault would it be? 125 00:04:39,425 --> 00:04:41,663 - I don't know. Maybe him? - Right. That's Teddy. 126 00:04:41,730 --> 00:04:44,168 - He wasn't even in a car. - But I get that a lot. 127 00:04:44,234 --> 00:04:46,907 Well, whoever was driving, besides me, 128 00:04:46,973 --> 00:04:48,013 'cause it wasn't my fault. 129 00:04:48,076 --> 00:04:50,581 - It wasn't my fault. - It sure wasn't mine. 130 00:04:50,648 --> 00:04:52,084 I don't think it was mine, either. 131 00:04:52,150 --> 00:04:53,954 Oh, my God. Was it my fault? 132 00:04:54,021 --> 00:04:55,591 Tina, sweetie, no. 133 00:04:55,658 --> 00:04:58,062 I mean, why were people stopped in the middle of the road? 134 00:04:58,129 --> 00:04:59,599 Roads are for driving. 135 00:04:59,666 --> 00:05:01,536 And life is a highway. 136 00:05:01,603 --> 00:05:04,274 Maybe Elaine here was clowning around 137 00:05:04,341 --> 00:05:06,378 and slammed on her brakes for no reason. 138 00:05:06,445 --> 00:05:07,849 Actually, the reason I stopped 139 00:05:07,915 --> 00:05:10,086 was because a ball bounced into the road. 140 00:05:10,153 --> 00:05:13,259 Maybe Graham didn't notice because he was on his phone? 141 00:05:13,326 --> 00:05:16,365 What? Uh, no. What about this guy Bob? 142 00:05:16,432 --> 00:05:17,768 He could be at fault. 143 00:05:17,835 --> 00:05:20,240 Maybe he was jamming out to his music or something? 144 00:05:20,306 --> 00:05:22,110 What? I‐I wasn't jamming out. 145 00:05:22,177 --> 00:05:23,780 Then why'd you apologize earlier? 146 00:05:23,847 --> 00:05:25,518 - I didn't. - Uh, yeah, you did. 147 00:05:25,584 --> 00:05:26,904 - When? - The part where you said, 148 00:05:26,953 --> 00:05:29,158 - "I'm sorry this happened." - You did say that. 149 00:05:29,224 --> 00:05:30,493 I heard it, too. 150 00:05:30,561 --> 00:05:31,863 - I think you did, Bob. - Um... 151 00:05:31,930 --> 00:05:34,702 To be fair, our dad has resting apology face. 152 00:05:34,769 --> 00:05:36,873 And his body is all like, "my bad." 153 00:05:36,940 --> 00:05:39,178 Okay, fine. Maybe I did say sorry. 154 00:05:39,244 --> 00:05:42,652 But, um, uh, Patti said she felt terrible, remember? 155 00:05:42,718 --> 00:05:45,991 I do feel terrible. My wiener dog broke. 156 00:05:46,058 --> 00:05:48,997 He lives on my dashboard and he keeps me company in traffic. 157 00:05:49,064 --> 00:05:51,468 - Mm‐hm. - I'm telling you, Bob, just call the cops. 158 00:05:51,536 --> 00:05:52,705 You know what, everyone? 159 00:05:52,772 --> 00:05:54,172 Maybe we should just call the police 160 00:05:54,208 --> 00:05:55,443 and let them figure this out. 161 00:05:55,511 --> 00:05:56,646 - Fine by me. - Me, too. 162 00:05:56,713 --> 00:05:58,249 Just as long as we're done by 4:00. 163 00:05:58,316 --> 00:06:00,521 I'm clowning at a bris pre‐party. 164 00:06:00,588 --> 00:06:03,125 (sighs) I guess this is not gonna be so simple. 165 00:06:03,192 --> 00:06:06,365 That's what I say every time I approach a toilet seat. 166 00:06:06,432 --> 00:06:10,073 Remember, in life there are no accidents! 167 00:06:14,816 --> 00:06:16,027 Okay, so the police are on their way. 168 00:06:16,051 --> 00:06:17,430 I still can't believe that Patti person 169 00:06:17,454 --> 00:06:18,322 won't admit it was her fault. 170 00:06:18,389 --> 00:06:19,826 It's so obvious. 171 00:06:19,892 --> 00:06:22,063 Yeah, she sure went from sorry to sassy in no time. 172 00:06:22,130 --> 00:06:23,634 I told you, accidents have a way 173 00:06:23,700 --> 00:06:25,079 of bringing out the worst in people. 174 00:06:25,103 --> 00:06:27,016 Their fenders aren't the only things that bender. 175 00:06:27,040 --> 00:06:29,545 - You mean their ding‐dongs? - No, I mean they'll do anything 176 00:06:29,612 --> 00:06:31,081 to get out of trouble. You'll see. 177 00:06:31,148 --> 00:06:33,352 Stories change, alliances form. 178 00:06:33,419 --> 00:06:34,859 This shouldn't be complicated, right? 179 00:06:34,922 --> 00:06:37,327 The driver in the back is always at fault. 180 00:06:37,394 --> 00:06:38,394 Well, almost always. 181 00:06:38,429 --> 00:06:39,975 There are two exceptions where the driver in front 182 00:06:39,999 --> 00:06:41,068 is responsible. 183 00:06:41,135 --> 00:06:43,406 One, if they slam on their brakes for no reason. 184 00:06:43,472 --> 00:06:44,542 I was barely even moving. 185 00:06:44,609 --> 00:06:45,811 - That's your thing. - And two, 186 00:06:45,878 --> 00:06:47,447 if they swerve into traffic recklessly. 187 00:06:47,515 --> 00:06:48,717 I didn't do that, either. 188 00:06:48,784 --> 00:06:50,195 All I did was pull away from the curb. 189 00:06:50,219 --> 00:06:52,133 Well, it sounds like you're in the clear then, Bob. 190 00:06:52,157 --> 00:06:54,477 As long as you signaled when you pulled away from the curb. 191 00:06:54,529 --> 00:06:55,631 You did, right? 192 00:06:55,698 --> 00:06:57,133 Yeah. I mean, I always signal 193 00:06:57,200 --> 00:07:00,607 when I leave a curb, because I'm a safe driver. 194 00:07:00,674 --> 00:07:03,212 Mm. I'm hearing some doubt, Bob. Do you have some doubt? 195 00:07:03,279 --> 00:07:05,584 No. I believe I signaled. 196 00:07:05,651 --> 00:07:06,829 Oh, yeah, I'm hearing it, too. 197 00:07:06,853 --> 00:07:08,322 Could be doubt, could be gas. 198 00:07:08,389 --> 00:07:10,326 - Someone push on his stomach. - Gene, stop. 199 00:07:10,393 --> 00:07:12,497 Bob, you believe you signaled or you did? 200 00:07:12,565 --> 00:07:14,602 Those are two different things, legally speaking. 201 00:07:14,669 --> 00:07:16,673 Look, Teddy, the fact is it's Patti's job 202 00:07:16,740 --> 00:07:18,910 to not hit the car in front her. 203 00:07:18,977 --> 00:07:20,547 All I'm saying is in my experience, 204 00:07:20,614 --> 00:07:22,852 you only have a few minutes till the police get here. 205 00:07:22,918 --> 00:07:24,565 So you need to make the words coming out of your mouth 206 00:07:24,589 --> 00:07:26,993 good ones, not bad ones like they just were. 207 00:07:27,060 --> 00:07:28,897 I'm just trying to help you cover your butt. 208 00:07:28,964 --> 00:07:30,433 That's the brand of pants he wears. 209 00:07:30,501 --> 00:07:32,012 - "Help You Cover Your Butt." - Teddy's right. 210 00:07:32,036 --> 00:07:33,607 People can say whatever they want. 211 00:07:33,673 --> 00:07:35,677 Otherwise it's just he‐said‐she‐shed. 212 00:07:35,744 --> 00:07:37,013 He‐shed‐she‐stead. 213 00:07:37,080 --> 00:07:38,880 - It's one of those. - What about Jimmy Pesto? 214 00:07:38,917 --> 00:07:41,054 He came out on the street after the crash. 215 00:07:41,121 --> 00:07:42,257 Mostly to make fun of you, 216 00:07:42,323 --> 00:07:44,762 but maybe he could tell you who caused the accident. 217 00:07:44,829 --> 00:07:46,699 No. I am not talking to Jimmy. 218 00:07:46,766 --> 00:07:47,968 It might be worth it, Bob. 219 00:07:48,035 --> 00:07:49,806 What if his handsome eyes saw something? 220 00:07:49,872 --> 00:07:51,609 - Handsome eyes? - You think so, too? 221 00:07:51,676 --> 00:07:55,183 - (groans) Okay, I‐I'll be right back. - I'm coming. 222 00:07:55,249 --> 00:07:57,120 - Why? - I like going places. 223 00:07:57,187 --> 00:07:59,090 Hi, Andy. Hi, Ollie. 224 00:07:59,157 --> 00:08:02,030 - Who's your friend? - We're making a scarecrow. 225 00:08:02,096 --> 00:08:04,434 We'll finally be able to grow corn. 226 00:08:04,502 --> 00:08:05,938 Aw, I love it. 227 00:08:06,004 --> 00:08:08,944 Well, well, well. If it isn't Driving Mr. Oopsy. 228 00:08:09,010 --> 00:08:11,749 - (laughs) See? I laughed. - Yeah, that was good. 229 00:08:11,816 --> 00:08:13,687 Uh, look, Jimmy, we were wondering 230 00:08:13,753 --> 00:08:15,456 if you saw what happened with the accident. 231 00:08:15,524 --> 00:08:17,327 Yeah, I'm always looking across the street, 232 00:08:17,393 --> 00:08:19,532 because I'm obsessed with you, Bob. 233 00:08:19,599 --> 00:08:21,435 Not! (laughs) 234 00:08:21,503 --> 00:08:23,339 Actually, you do look over there a lot, Jimmy. 235 00:08:23,405 --> 00:08:24,842 Trev, just... (stammers) shush. 236 00:08:24,909 --> 00:08:26,813 No, Bob, I didn't see the accident. 237 00:08:26,880 --> 00:08:28,783 I was too busy serving customers. 238 00:08:28,850 --> 00:08:30,888 Ever heard of them? (laughs) 239 00:08:30,954 --> 00:08:32,858 Oh, go choke‐y on a gnocchi, Jimmy. 240 00:08:32,925 --> 00:08:34,729 Thank you for not helping in any way at all. 241 00:08:34,795 --> 00:08:36,566 Sure thing, Bob. All the best. 242 00:08:36,633 --> 00:08:38,445 - Nyah, nyah, la, la... - Now I'm craving gnocchis. 243 00:08:38,469 --> 00:08:40,106 LOUISE: Boy, I sure wish I was eating 244 00:08:40,172 --> 00:08:42,945 a giant bag of candy right now, but I can't, 245 00:08:43,012 --> 00:08:45,784 'cause you two ruined it with your hoarding and snorting. 246 00:08:45,851 --> 00:08:48,389 Louise, you were stealing. You're the one who ruined it. 247 00:08:48,455 --> 00:08:50,026 I snorted one. 248 00:08:50,092 --> 00:08:52,998 Bob, hey, just the guy I was looking for. 249 00:08:53,065 --> 00:08:54,065 Hi, Graham. 250 00:08:54,100 --> 00:08:56,204 Uh, do you mind if we step inside? 251 00:08:56,271 --> 00:08:58,242 Uh, sure. Uh, come on in. 252 00:08:58,309 --> 00:09:01,549 Can we get you burger? A little fender‐bender burger? 253 00:09:01,616 --> 00:09:02,952 No, I'm good. 254 00:09:03,018 --> 00:09:04,956 Something to drink? Little fender‐bender drink? 255 00:09:05,022 --> 00:09:07,126 Someone get the nice man something to drink. 256 00:09:07,193 --> 00:09:09,999 Can I start you off with a glass of fresh‐squeezed water? 257 00:09:10,066 --> 00:09:11,068 Are you an ice man? 258 00:09:11,134 --> 00:09:12,538 Actually Bob, I was hoping to maybe 259 00:09:12,605 --> 00:09:14,441 talk with you in private? 260 00:09:14,508 --> 00:09:17,280 Don't mind me. I'm just Bob's best friend, as we discussed. 261 00:09:17,347 --> 00:09:19,652 - (chuckles) - Graham, y‐you can just go ahead and say 262 00:09:19,719 --> 00:09:21,488 whatever you need to say. It's fine. 263 00:09:21,556 --> 00:09:22,891 Okay. Well, here goes. 264 00:09:22,958 --> 00:09:25,496 I wanted to see if maybe you would be interested 265 00:09:25,564 --> 00:09:27,735 in making an arrangement? 266 00:09:27,801 --> 00:09:30,172 - (coughs): Told you, Bob. - What kind of an arrangement? 267 00:09:30,239 --> 00:09:32,911 - Like an alliance? - It's just your standard arrangement 268 00:09:32,978 --> 00:09:35,182 where we forge an understanding between us 269 00:09:35,249 --> 00:09:38,823 - to nail down a story. - Nail down a story. 270 00:09:38,890 --> 00:09:40,090 Yeah. Here's what I'm thinking. 271 00:09:40,126 --> 00:09:41,696 You know how Patti was super into 272 00:09:41,763 --> 00:09:44,300 that weird little plastic wiener dog on her dashboard? 273 00:09:44,367 --> 00:09:46,706 - Yeah? - Probably pretty distracting, right? 274 00:09:46,773 --> 00:09:48,943 - Okay. - Well, maybe we should both bring that up. 275 00:09:49,010 --> 00:09:50,981 I‐I feel like we should probably 276 00:09:51,048 --> 00:09:53,218 just tell the police what happened. 277 00:09:53,285 --> 00:09:54,989 And then, that's all. 278 00:09:55,056 --> 00:09:57,393 No, no, I know. But here's the thing, Bob. 279 00:09:57,460 --> 00:09:58,997 Patti's gonna have a story about us, 280 00:09:59,064 --> 00:10:01,268 so we should have a story about her. 281 00:10:01,334 --> 00:10:03,973 And if you and I both have the same story, 282 00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:05,844 then it really seals the deal. 283 00:10:05,911 --> 00:10:07,113 We're same‐story bros, right? 284 00:10:07,180 --> 00:10:09,084 All you have to say is, "Officer, 285 00:10:09,150 --> 00:10:11,221 "the woman who hit me was distracted. 286 00:10:11,288 --> 00:10:13,860 Big time, 100%, no doubt about it." 287 00:10:13,927 --> 00:10:15,362 I‐I'm not gonna say that. 288 00:10:15,429 --> 00:10:17,209 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're right. 289 00:10:17,233 --> 00:10:19,180 We probably don't even need to have the same story. 290 00:10:19,204 --> 00:10:20,850 (laughs): I don't know why I brought that up. 291 00:10:20,874 --> 00:10:22,243 Ooh, water. Yum, yum, yum. 292 00:10:22,310 --> 00:10:24,214 Hey, I got to go. Nice chatting with you, Bob. 293 00:10:24,280 --> 00:10:25,316 See you later. 294 00:10:25,382 --> 00:10:26,619 Ugh. Do you believe that guy? 295 00:10:26,686 --> 00:10:28,656 I know. He had a watch and everything. 296 00:10:28,723 --> 00:10:30,235 You maybe should've taken the deal, Bob. 297 00:10:30,259 --> 00:10:31,529 Also, he smelled nice. 298 00:10:31,596 --> 00:10:33,165 - Oh, boy. - What? W‐What's happening? 299 00:10:33,232 --> 00:10:35,771 Oh, looks like Graham over there is talking to Patti now. 300 00:10:35,837 --> 00:10:37,775 They do seem to be huddling. 301 00:10:37,841 --> 00:10:39,545 - Oh, no. - Huddling's not good, Bob. 302 00:10:39,612 --> 00:10:43,118 - Maybe they're just cold? - All right, I‐I'm gonna go talk with them, also. 303 00:10:43,185 --> 00:10:44,922 - (speaking indistinctly) - Hello. Hi. 304 00:10:44,989 --> 00:10:49,632 - Hey, there, Bob. - I‐I was just wondering what you two were talking about. 305 00:10:49,698 --> 00:10:52,170 Oh, we were just talking about the clouds. 306 00:10:52,236 --> 00:10:54,642 ‐Clouds. ‐Yeah, clouds. Don't you love them? 307 00:10:54,708 --> 00:10:56,512 They're so fluffy. Isn't that right, Patti? 308 00:10:56,579 --> 00:10:57,915 Oh, yeah. Uh, big time. 309 00:10:57,981 --> 00:10:59,985 100%. No doubt about it. (belches) 310 00:11:00,052 --> 00:11:02,323 - Wait, why did you just say that? - What do you mean? 311 00:11:02,390 --> 00:11:05,630 Graham just said those exact words to me. 312 00:11:05,697 --> 00:11:07,166 Uh, I big time did not. 313 00:11:07,233 --> 00:11:09,738 So you two were making an alliance. 314 00:11:09,805 --> 00:11:11,609 You were alliancing. 315 00:11:11,676 --> 00:11:12,778 Bob, the cops are here. 316 00:11:12,845 --> 00:11:14,447 Yep. Yep, they are. 317 00:11:14,515 --> 00:11:16,017 - Oh, God. - What's wrong, Dad? 318 00:11:16,084 --> 00:11:17,821 I think I just didn't cover my butt. 319 00:11:17,888 --> 00:11:20,927 - TEDDY: Uh‐huh. - LOUISE: And now it's flappin' all over the place. 320 00:11:25,135 --> 00:11:26,338 Afternoon. I'm Officer Bridget. 321 00:11:26,404 --> 00:11:27,449 Glad to see everyone's okay. 322 00:11:27,473 --> 00:11:28,673 Here's how this is gonna work. 323 00:11:28,710 --> 00:11:30,088 I'll speak with each driver individually 324 00:11:30,112 --> 00:11:31,390 to get your accounts of what happened, 325 00:11:31,414 --> 00:11:33,027 then I'll write my report, and based on that 326 00:11:33,051 --> 00:11:35,356 your insurance companies will determine liability 327 00:11:35,422 --> 00:11:36,826 and all that fun stuff. 328 00:11:36,893 --> 00:11:38,471 Let's make this quick since I know everyone's busy. 329 00:11:38,495 --> 00:11:40,442 Some of us are even trying to rent out a guest house. 330 00:11:40,466 --> 00:11:42,804 Newly renovated. Eh, something to think about. 331 00:11:42,871 --> 00:11:44,007 Okay, who wants to start? 332 00:11:44,073 --> 00:11:45,409 - Me, me. I'll go. - (Bob groans) 333 00:11:45,476 --> 00:11:47,446 Great. You a homeowner? Could you see yourself 334 00:11:47,514 --> 00:11:49,017 living real close to a highway? 335 00:11:49,083 --> 00:11:51,589 Uh‐oh, Bob, you think they're gonna throw you under the bus? 336 00:11:51,656 --> 00:11:54,193 - The car accident bus? - Ugh, maybe. 337 00:11:54,260 --> 00:11:55,830 (quietly): Psst, Bob, if I were you, 338 00:11:55,897 --> 00:11:57,266 I'd go talk to the clown lady. 339 00:11:57,333 --> 00:11:58,979 She could be your last chance to form an alliance 340 00:11:59,003 --> 00:12:00,215 of your own and protect yourself. 341 00:12:00,239 --> 00:12:02,410 Yeah, maybe that's a good idea. 342 00:12:02,476 --> 00:12:03,913 Whoa, whoa, I'm coming with you. 343 00:12:03,980 --> 00:12:05,951 - Why? - You crazy? Free clown. 344 00:12:06,017 --> 00:12:07,420 I could use a little clown. 345 00:12:07,486 --> 00:12:08,723 - Hell yeah. - Okay. 346 00:12:08,790 --> 00:12:11,629 Hi, Elaine, I was wondering if we could, uh, 347 00:12:11,696 --> 00:12:13,031 maybe chat for a second. 348 00:12:13,098 --> 00:12:14,935 - Also, my kids are right here. - Ooh! 349 00:12:16,906 --> 00:12:18,676 Who wants one of these? 350 00:12:18,743 --> 00:12:20,446 Yay! Is it a hat? 351 00:12:20,513 --> 00:12:22,350 It's a hat and it's a swan. 352 00:12:22,416 --> 00:12:23,586 Whoa, whoa, slow down. 353 00:12:23,653 --> 00:12:25,557 - Ow! I'm okay. - So, uh, yeah. 354 00:12:25,623 --> 00:12:29,598 I just wanted to chat about how you and I, uh, could maybe, 355 00:12:29,665 --> 00:12:32,136 um, you know, help each other out 356 00:12:32,203 --> 00:12:35,009 - with all this car stuff. - Uh‐huh, uh‐huh. 357 00:12:35,075 --> 00:12:36,846 Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. 358 00:12:36,912 --> 00:12:39,952 Oh... oh... oh... 359 00:12:40,019 --> 00:12:41,287 - Aha! - Huh. That's, uh... 360 00:12:41,354 --> 00:12:44,193 That‐That's so good. That's funny. Anyway, 361 00:12:44,260 --> 00:12:47,500 I was wondering if you wanted to, um‐‐ oh, God‐‐ 362 00:12:47,567 --> 00:12:48,567 f‐form an alliance. 363 00:12:48,603 --> 00:12:50,172 Hmm, let me think about that. 364 00:12:50,239 --> 00:12:51,408 ‐(bicycle horn honks) ‐Oop! 365 00:12:51,474 --> 00:12:54,047 - Oh, there's my horn! - Keep it coming. 366 00:12:54,113 --> 00:12:56,184 Elaine, I get the feeling you're not taking 367 00:12:56,251 --> 00:12:58,288 this accident very seriously. 368 00:12:58,355 --> 00:13:00,693 Oh, sorry. It's‐it's hard to turn it off. 369 00:13:00,760 --> 00:13:03,465 I just get such a kick out of seeing people light up 370 00:13:03,533 --> 00:13:05,002 when I do stuff like this. 371 00:13:05,069 --> 00:13:07,941 Woop! Meerp. Woop! Meerp. 372 00:13:08,008 --> 00:13:10,012 - So much range. - One more. 373 00:13:10,079 --> 00:13:11,281 - Whoop! - Thank you. 374 00:13:11,347 --> 00:13:12,283 Life can be tough. 375 00:13:12,349 --> 00:13:14,855 People can use a few extra smiles, huh? 376 00:13:14,922 --> 00:13:15,857 I'll take that. 377 00:13:15,924 --> 00:13:17,126 "Clown Eyed Girl. 378 00:13:17,193 --> 00:13:19,865 Mobile door‐to‐door clowning service." 379 00:13:19,932 --> 00:13:21,234 This clown gets around. 380 00:13:21,301 --> 00:13:23,105 Anyway, what were you asking me about, Bob? 381 00:13:23,171 --> 00:13:24,216 Something about an alliance? 382 00:13:24,240 --> 00:13:25,442 You know what, don't‐don't... 383 00:13:25,510 --> 00:13:27,379 don't worry about it. Just forget it. 384 00:13:27,446 --> 00:13:31,121 Well, there is one thing I would love to discuss with you. 385 00:13:31,187 --> 00:13:33,125 - What happened to your nose?! - Aah! 386 00:13:33,191 --> 00:13:35,530 Phew. (chuckles) Good one. 387 00:13:35,597 --> 00:13:37,500 So, how'd it go with Elaine? 388 00:13:37,567 --> 00:13:40,072 - It was... I mean... - She's our new godmother. 389 00:13:40,139 --> 00:13:43,178 - Sir? You're up. - Okay. I‐I'm coming. 390 00:13:43,245 --> 00:13:44,948 This is it, Bob. You're gonna do great. 391 00:13:45,015 --> 00:13:46,351 You can cry on cue, right? 392 00:13:46,417 --> 00:13:49,223 So, yeah, I had just started the car, 393 00:13:49,290 --> 00:13:50,627 and I was turning into traffic... 394 00:13:50,693 --> 00:13:52,998 You and your family were eating at this diner? 395 00:13:53,064 --> 00:13:54,568 Um, it's not a diner. 396 00:13:54,635 --> 00:13:58,008 I mean, nothing against diners, but this is a burger place. 397 00:13:58,074 --> 00:14:00,479 - Uh, also, we own it. - Got it. 398 00:14:00,547 --> 00:14:01,749 - Owns... diner. - Mm‐hmm. 399 00:14:01,815 --> 00:14:03,218 Continue with your story, please. 400 00:14:03,285 --> 00:14:06,057 So, uh, yeah, like I said, I was, um, uh, 401 00:14:06,124 --> 00:14:07,561 turning into traffic when... 402 00:14:07,627 --> 00:14:10,332 And did you use your turn signal when you entered the lane? 403 00:14:10,399 --> 00:14:11,399 I‐I believe so. 404 00:14:11,434 --> 00:14:13,205 No, no, no, no, no. Don't say that. 405 00:14:13,271 --> 00:14:15,409 I mean, I, um, uh, not believe... I... 406 00:14:15,475 --> 00:14:18,415 (chuckles) Yeah, I‐I definitely did. Yes. 407 00:14:18,481 --> 00:14:20,219 - Attaboy. - (quietly): Okay, Teddy, okay. 408 00:14:20,285 --> 00:14:22,156 Is that man punching the air? 409 00:14:22,223 --> 00:14:24,528 Yes. He's, uh, he‐he's one of our customers. 410 00:14:24,595 --> 00:14:27,499 - Do you know if he rents or owns? - Uh, I think he owns. 411 00:14:27,567 --> 00:14:30,339 - Mm. - Um, so it's the car in the back's fault, right? 412 00:14:30,405 --> 00:14:32,343 I got what I need. Good luck with your diner. 413 00:14:32,409 --> 00:14:34,848 It's not a... Uh, uh, thank you. 414 00:14:34,915 --> 00:14:36,952 (groans) Now she's talking to Patti. 415 00:14:37,019 --> 00:14:38,154 Wh‐What is she saying? 416 00:14:38,221 --> 00:14:39,958 Why can't people own up to their mistakes? 417 00:14:40,025 --> 00:14:41,361 I‐It doesn't seem that hard. 418 00:14:41,427 --> 00:14:43,098 Ah, I'd love to live in that world, too. 419 00:14:43,164 --> 00:14:44,711 - (fryer beeping) - Poor, sweet, dumb Bob. 420 00:14:44,735 --> 00:14:47,607 ‐Ooh, is that more fries? ‐Hold your horses. Coming right up. 421 00:14:47,674 --> 00:14:50,513 (to beeping rhythm): ♪ Fries are done, I'm a great son ♪ 422 00:14:50,580 --> 00:14:52,617 ♪ Fries are done, I'm a great son. ♪ 423 00:14:52,684 --> 00:14:55,055 (gasps) Wait, Dad. I just realized something 424 00:14:55,122 --> 00:14:56,525 about the accident. 425 00:14:56,592 --> 00:14:58,796 - Really? - I don't think you used your turn signal. 426 00:14:58,863 --> 00:15:00,700 - What? How do you know that? - Yeah. 427 00:15:00,767 --> 00:15:03,939 - You know how Gene has a song for every sound in our lives? - Yeah. 428 00:15:04,006 --> 00:15:06,044 Well, he has a song for your turn signal, too. 429 00:15:06,110 --> 00:15:08,048 Yep. It goes: ♪ Fart left, it's a stinker ♪ 430 00:15:08,114 --> 00:15:09,985 ♪ Fart right, use your blinker! ♪ 431 00:15:10,052 --> 00:15:12,089 Okay, okay, yes, Gene, we all know the song. 432 00:15:12,156 --> 00:15:14,393 Well, I don't remember him singing it in the car today. 433 00:15:14,460 --> 00:15:17,333 - I don't remember that, either. - Neither do I. 434 00:15:17,399 --> 00:15:18,401 Oh, Bob. 435 00:15:18,468 --> 00:15:20,673 Okay, fine, maybe I didn't signal. 436 00:15:20,740 --> 00:15:24,213 But tha‐that doesn't mean I entered the lane dangerously. 437 00:15:24,280 --> 00:15:26,117 Bup‐bup‐bup. Father, you just said 438 00:15:26,184 --> 00:15:27,854 people should own up to their mistakes. 439 00:15:27,921 --> 00:15:29,600 And then you said it doesn't seem that hard. 440 00:15:29,624 --> 00:15:31,829 And also you've been saying it all day, and it's, like, 441 00:15:31,895 --> 00:15:33,566 cool catchphrase, give it a rest! 442 00:15:33,632 --> 00:15:37,874 (sighs) All right, I'll go talk to Officer Bridget. 443 00:15:37,941 --> 00:15:38,809 Officer Bridget, hi. 444 00:15:38,876 --> 00:15:41,280 I‐I just wanted to change the words I said, 445 00:15:41,347 --> 00:15:44,420 - uh, in your report. - I don't really have time right now, Bob. 446 00:15:44,487 --> 00:15:46,457 I have to go deal with a highway robbery. 447 00:15:46,525 --> 00:15:48,237 And by "highway robbery," I'm referring to the guy 448 00:15:48,261 --> 00:15:50,475 who's painting my guesthouse‐‐ he's charging me a fortune. 449 00:15:50,499 --> 00:15:52,871 Anyway, it's too late to change the report. I'm all done. 450 00:15:52,937 --> 00:15:54,608 W‐Wait, what do you mean you're all done? 451 00:15:54,674 --> 00:15:56,521 Patti told me what happened. Graham backed it up. 452 00:15:56,545 --> 00:15:58,582 Car one‐‐ that's Elaine‐‐ slammed on her brakes 453 00:15:58,649 --> 00:16:00,753 for no apparent reason, which caused the accident. 454 00:16:00,820 --> 00:16:03,526 So your report just says this is Elaine's fault, 455 00:16:03,592 --> 00:16:05,563 and she's gonna have to pay for this? 456 00:16:05,630 --> 00:16:08,201 Well, her insurance will. Some people shouldn't drive. 457 00:16:08,268 --> 00:16:10,238 No, no, no, no, she‐she can't not drive. 458 00:16:10,305 --> 00:16:11,775 She's a traveling clown. 459 00:16:11,842 --> 00:16:14,346 Can't she just carpool with 20 or 30 other clowns? 460 00:16:14,413 --> 00:16:16,752 (chuckles) Sorry. Someone had to say it. 461 00:16:16,819 --> 00:16:18,354 What'd the policewoman say? 462 00:16:18,421 --> 00:16:21,127 She said Patti and Graham both blamed it on Elaine. 463 00:16:21,194 --> 00:16:23,766 So I guess the report's gonna say it was her fault. 464 00:16:23,833 --> 00:16:27,139 - Oh, no. Poor Elaine. - She was the best of all of us. 465 00:16:27,206 --> 00:16:29,043 I guess heaven needed a clown. 466 00:16:29,109 --> 00:16:31,347 She's not dead, kids. She just got screwed over. 467 00:16:31,414 --> 00:16:32,984 You did what you could, Bob. 468 00:16:33,051 --> 00:16:36,357 - You owned up to your mistakes. - Actually, I never told the cop 469 00:16:36,424 --> 00:16:38,662 about me not using my turn signal. 470 00:16:38,729 --> 00:16:40,700 - Wait. You didn't? - I started to, but, uh, 471 00:16:40,766 --> 00:16:43,839 it just didn't quite get all the way out of my mouth. 472 00:16:43,906 --> 00:16:45,242 Oh, boy. Sounds like you kinda 473 00:16:45,308 --> 00:16:46,688 threw that clown under the bus, Bob, 474 00:16:46,712 --> 00:16:48,782 and now she's gonna have to take the bus. 475 00:16:48,849 --> 00:16:51,254 Bad news for Elaine. Good news for that bus driver. 476 00:16:51,320 --> 00:16:54,159 She's gonna find so many quarters behind his ear! 477 00:16:58,001 --> 00:16:59,647 I can't believe you never told the policewoman you didn't 478 00:16:59,671 --> 00:17:01,471 - use your turn signal, Dad. - In other words, 479 00:17:01,508 --> 00:17:03,020 we should take responsibility for acting like jerks 480 00:17:03,044 --> 00:17:04,848 when it comes to cheap bags of candy, 481 00:17:04,915 --> 00:17:07,019 but you can just say whatever you want 482 00:17:07,085 --> 00:17:08,556 in an official police report. 483 00:17:08,622 --> 00:17:11,227 (sighs) I know, Louise. I screwed up. 484 00:17:11,294 --> 00:17:13,766 I‐I need to go make this right. 485 00:17:13,832 --> 00:17:15,101 Wait, wait, wait. Stop. 486 00:17:15,168 --> 00:17:17,139 Whoa, whoa, hey! We don't want another accident 487 00:17:17,205 --> 00:17:18,509 in front of your diner, Bob. 488 00:17:18,576 --> 00:17:20,478 Officer Bridget, please. J‐Just hear me out. 489 00:17:20,546 --> 00:17:23,351 I came here before to tell you that 490 00:17:23,418 --> 00:17:25,355 I didn't actually put on my signal. 491 00:17:25,422 --> 00:17:27,025 I‐I remembered that after we spoke. 492 00:17:27,092 --> 00:17:30,131 But the point is, at least some of the blame for this accident 493 00:17:30,198 --> 00:17:31,535 should be on me. 494 00:17:31,602 --> 00:17:33,447 Okay, great. I'll definitely make a note of that. 495 00:17:33,471 --> 00:17:34,808 Now, please move out of the way. 496 00:17:34,874 --> 00:17:37,412 Look, I‐I just think maybe, in a perfect world, 497 00:17:37,479 --> 00:17:40,720 - this was all of our faults. - PATTI: Hey, Bob. 498 00:17:40,786 --> 00:17:43,291 - What are you talking about? - Yeah, what's going on, Bob? 499 00:17:43,358 --> 00:17:44,894 I was just telling Officer Bridget here 500 00:17:44,961 --> 00:17:46,464 that I didn't use my turn signal, 501 00:17:46,531 --> 00:17:48,669 so it's only fair that I share some of the blame. 502 00:17:48,736 --> 00:17:52,175 Wow, that's kind of inspiring, Bob. 503 00:17:52,242 --> 00:17:55,148 The truth is, I was distracted by my wiener dog. 504 00:17:55,215 --> 00:17:58,789 So I guess I was also partially responsible. 505 00:17:58,856 --> 00:18:00,091 Mm, okay. 506 00:18:00,158 --> 00:18:04,133 I was on my phone, too, so, yes, I was probably very distracted. 507 00:18:04,199 --> 00:18:05,870 ♪ I was distracted ♪ 508 00:18:05,936 --> 00:18:08,676 ♪ By my wiener dog ♪ 509 00:18:08,742 --> 00:18:12,850 ♪ So it's almost my fault, I think ♪ 510 00:18:12,917 --> 00:18:15,455 ♪ And I was on my cell phone ♪ 511 00:18:15,523 --> 00:18:17,527 ♪ Didn't see what was going on ♪ 512 00:18:17,593 --> 00:18:20,498 ♪ So I can't say my poop don't stink ♪ 513 00:18:20,566 --> 00:18:23,438 ♪ Because taking responsibility ♪ 514 00:18:23,505 --> 00:18:25,509 ♪ For your actions ♪ 515 00:18:25,576 --> 00:18:27,647 ♪ Whoa, is the real path ♪ 516 00:18:27,714 --> 00:18:30,519 ♪ To satisfaction ♪ 517 00:18:30,586 --> 00:18:33,525 ♪ The only thing that works in life ♪ 518 00:18:33,592 --> 00:18:35,596 ♪ Is not being a jerk in life ♪ 519 00:18:35,663 --> 00:18:40,171 ♪ Taking responsibility is the best way to be ♪ 520 00:18:40,238 --> 00:18:42,744 ♪ For you ♪ 521 00:18:42,810 --> 00:18:46,718 ♪ And for me. ♪ 522 00:18:46,785 --> 00:18:48,354 BRIDGET: You okay, Bob? 523 00:18:48,421 --> 00:18:49,466 Lost you there for a second. 524 00:18:49,490 --> 00:18:51,561 Oh. Right. Everyone's gone. 525 00:18:51,628 --> 00:18:53,866 Um, sorry. So, I‐I don't know why Elaine stopped, 526 00:18:53,932 --> 00:18:56,705 but I‐I just don't think this was all her fault. 527 00:18:56,772 --> 00:18:59,511 Well, she said she saw a ball bounce into the street, 528 00:18:59,577 --> 00:19:01,782 but no one else saw it, so I just assumed 529 00:19:01,848 --> 00:19:03,084 she was covering her butt. 530 00:19:03,151 --> 00:19:05,455 And then she sat on a horn and it honked. 531 00:19:05,523 --> 00:19:08,261 - Which was pretty funny. - ANDY: Be scared, crows. 532 00:19:08,327 --> 00:19:10,098 Be very scared! 533 00:19:10,165 --> 00:19:12,135 Wait. Andy, Ollie, 534 00:19:12,202 --> 00:19:13,872 didn't your scarecrow have a head before? 535 00:19:13,939 --> 00:19:16,076 Li‐Like a cantaloupe head? 536 00:19:16,143 --> 00:19:17,279 We lost it. 537 00:19:17,345 --> 00:19:18,715 What‐what do you mean, you lost it? 538 00:19:18,782 --> 00:19:20,929 It rolled into the street and we didn't see where it went. 539 00:19:20,953 --> 00:19:23,224 That must have been the ball that Elaine stopped for. 540 00:19:23,291 --> 00:19:24,694 It was probably a cantaloupe. 541 00:19:24,761 --> 00:19:27,165 It probably bounced into the street in front of her car! 542 00:19:27,232 --> 00:19:30,038 - Look! Is that it? - ANDY and OLLIE: No! 543 00:19:30,104 --> 00:19:32,008 We got to be strong. 544 00:19:32,075 --> 00:19:34,112 We have to get ready for the harvest. 545 00:19:34,179 --> 00:19:35,248 You're right. 546 00:19:35,315 --> 00:19:36,785 Okay, so that changes things. 547 00:19:36,852 --> 00:19:39,456 The way I see it now, driver one stopped for a legitimate reason, 548 00:19:39,524 --> 00:19:42,797 driver two rear‐ended her, driver three‐ that's you, Bob‐‐ 549 00:19:42,864 --> 00:19:44,667 pulled into traffic without signaling, 550 00:19:44,734 --> 00:19:46,605 driver four rear‐ended driver three, 551 00:19:46,671 --> 00:19:48,675 when then sent driver three into driver two's car, 552 00:19:48,742 --> 00:19:51,247 which caused driver two to hit driver one's car 553 00:19:51,313 --> 00:19:53,184 for a second time. 554 00:19:53,251 --> 00:19:55,488 Uh, yeah, that sounds right. 555 00:19:55,556 --> 00:19:56,836 Look, I'm no insurance adjuster, 556 00:19:56,892 --> 00:19:59,162 but it sounds like you may be the only person 557 00:19:59,229 --> 00:20:01,166 taking any responsibility for this accident. 558 00:20:01,233 --> 00:20:03,337 Which, in insurance terms, could mean 559 00:20:03,404 --> 00:20:05,308 that you end up taking all of it. 560 00:20:05,375 --> 00:20:07,312 Oh, God. (sighs) Fine. 561 00:20:07,379 --> 00:20:09,349 If that's the way it has to be. 562 00:20:09,416 --> 00:20:11,176 I'll put your amended statement in my report. 563 00:20:11,220 --> 00:20:12,957 And I'm glad we got this nailed down. 564 00:20:13,024 --> 00:20:15,137 Just like, uh, we nailed down that new indoor‐outdoor carpet 565 00:20:15,161 --> 00:20:18,735 at my guesthouse. It's 100 extra square feet of living area. 566 00:20:18,802 --> 00:20:20,839 I mean, why can't I rent this place? 567 00:20:20,906 --> 00:20:23,411 Well, our insurance is gonna go up. 568 00:20:23,477 --> 00:20:25,281 Well, up's better than down. 569 00:20:25,348 --> 00:20:26,483 Wait, no, that's not right. 570 00:20:26,551 --> 00:20:28,031 But hey, you did the right thing, Bob. 571 00:20:28,087 --> 00:20:29,489 And you know what goes great 572 00:20:29,557 --> 00:20:31,293 with our insurance rates going up? 573 00:20:31,360 --> 00:20:32,730 Some discount candy! 574 00:20:32,797 --> 00:20:35,001 - KIDS: Yay! - I mean, not really. 575 00:20:35,068 --> 00:20:37,506 Ugh, you know what? I don't want to be jerky. 576 00:20:37,573 --> 00:20:39,242 Tina, you can have mine. 577 00:20:39,309 --> 00:20:41,380 I kinda sorta stole a lot from you earlier. 578 00:20:41,447 --> 00:20:42,650 Oh, I know. But it's okay. 579 00:20:42,717 --> 00:20:44,062 I was hoarding like a hoardin' fool. 580 00:20:44,086 --> 00:20:46,290 You can both have mine. I was eating too fast. 581 00:20:46,357 --> 00:20:48,260 - I stopped unwrapping them. - Wait a minute. 582 00:20:48,327 --> 00:20:51,233 This bag is light. Like, really light. 583 00:20:51,300 --> 00:20:52,703 Mother! 584 00:20:52,770 --> 00:20:54,239 What? No! 585 00:20:54,306 --> 00:20:56,410 No, I wouldn't do that. Bob, back me up. 586 00:20:56,477 --> 00:20:57,847 You want an alliance? 587 00:20:57,913 --> 00:21:00,719 - LINDA: Ooh! Yeah, yeah, yeah. - GENE: Pump her stomach! 588 00:21:00,786 --> 00:21:03,892 ♪ Responsibility for your actions ♪ 589 00:21:03,959 --> 00:21:07,633 ♪ Is the real path to satisfaction ♪ 590 00:21:08,267 --> 00:21:10,506 ♪ The only thing that works in life ♪ 591 00:21:10,572 --> 00:21:13,512 ♪ Is not being a jerk in life ♪ 592 00:21:13,578 --> 00:21:18,254 ♪ Taking responsibility's the best way to be ♪ 593 00:21:18,320 --> 00:21:20,391 ♪ For you ♪ 594 00:21:20,458 --> 00:21:21,460 ♪ And ♪ 595 00:21:21,528 --> 00:21:24,232 ♪ For me ♪ 596 00:21:24,299 --> 00:21:26,003 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 597 00:21:26,070 --> 00:21:28,708 ♪ For you ♪ 598 00:21:28,775 --> 00:21:30,913 - ♪ And ♪ - ♪ Responsibility ♪ 599 00:21:30,979 --> 00:21:32,148 ♪ For me ♪ 600 00:21:32,215 --> 00:21:33,685 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah. ♪ 601 00:21:33,752 --> 00:21:34,930 Captioning sponsored by BENTO BOX ENTERTAINMENT 602 00:21:34,954 --> 00:21:36,156 and TOYOTA.