1
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[♪ theme music playing]

2
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You know, I bet if coffee
came in different colors,

3
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more kids would drink it.

4
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That's why I drink rose.

5
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Oh hey, Nat!

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Linda! Robert!

7
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-Children, Theodore.
-Hey Nat!

8
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Nat! Light of my life!
Come! Sit!

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Tell us of the world.

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Yeah, grab a stool, fool.
Sorry.

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I'd actually love
to sit and chat

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while I eat one
of your fine cheeseburgers.

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I have a little time to kill before I
meet with my next client.

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Dad. You heard the lady.

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Go make the burger.

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Sorry about him. He's new.

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I-- I'm not. I--
I've been here-- a while.

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Are you driving anyone interesting
in the limo today?

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Is it a girl who just
found out she's a princess

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and now her world is gonna
turn upside-down?

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-Oh.
-No, that's tomorrow.

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Today I'm working with one of my
Calm in 60 Seconds students.

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-Your what?
-Calm in 60 Seconds.

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It's a business I started
to help people with road rage.

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Especially folks who need court-mandated
rage restructuring.

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Wow. You teach people
not to road rage?

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But without road rage, there would be
no Mad Max Fury Road.

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You haven't seen
that though, right?

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Just the trailer. And all the scenes
that are in the trailer.

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And the rest. And the prequel.
Why? Have you?

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Yeah, they were really good.

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How did you get into
the road rage racket, Nat.

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Well, this may shock you,
but I am a former road rager.

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Yep, I had a case
of the double R's and bad.

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You see, when I first
started driving a limo

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I worked for a guy
named Ronnie Glow...

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[Gene] Glow on.

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[Nat] This was at the height
of the stretch limo biz.

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If you weren't riding around in a car that
was at least 30 feet long,

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you were nothing to nobody.

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And Ronnie Glow
was the biggest game in town.

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But working under him,
[scoffs] it wasn't easy.

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He made us drive 70,
80 hours a week,

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and if you asked for any time
off,

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he'd say, "If you don't want
to glow, you gotta go."

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And then he'd make you
repeat back, "I want to glow."

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[Gene] Dad makes us say, "If you don't
want to Bob, get another job.

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I don't say that,
but I should.

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I felt so much anger towards Ronathon,
Glow all the time.

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But I held it in
until I drove home

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and then, oh boy,

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I'd really let it out.

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Honking.

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-Yelling.
-Move it or lose it.

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And worst of all,
the throwing.

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Whatever food I had in my car.

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Hot dogs. Taquitos.
Croissants. Sandwiches.

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I kept it bottled up when I was in the
limo with clients.

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But then one day,
an incident occurred.

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Oh my God! Sorry, I just love hearing
about incidents.

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It was the day before Easter,
which, turns out,

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was the day of the Easter parade.

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I had a wedding party in the limo and

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we were running just a
smidge behind schedule.

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I pull up to an intersection

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and this guy driving
an Easter bunny float

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rolls through the stop sign

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and I get stuck
right behind him

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and he's going so slow.

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And now I'm afraid I'm gonna
be late for this wedding.

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And there are three things
you should know about me.

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I sunburn easy. I have a hell of a time
getting out of a beanbag chair.

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And I am never late.

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The rage, she took me.

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And that's when
I reached for...

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my tomato basil soup.

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I had a big old 20 ounce
Tupperware

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and I launched it
right at that poor bunny.

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[screams]

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Almost lost my limo license.

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That was rock bottom.

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I spent three months on a woodworking
commune in Pennsylvania,

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just trying to clear my head,

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making rocking chairs
and wooden knick-knacks.

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Whittling. Releasing. Healing.

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[whispering] I'm sorry.

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I realize road raging
is like trying to muscle

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your way through hardwood.

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You'll cut your finger
and you'll chip your blade.

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The trick, it turns out,
is to go with the grain.

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You gotta muscle the wood when
you turn the trick.

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-Got it.
-[Bob] Gene.

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So with that newfound wisdom,
I swore I would do my best to help others.

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But also charge them.
'Cause I need money.

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Hey, that's why
I charge people too! Money.

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Uh, so you help people
get over road rage?

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That's-- interesting.

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-Isn't that interesting, Linda?
-I guess.

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Yeah, I agree, Mom.

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-That is interesting.
-Mm-hmm.

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What the hell is everyone
looking at me for?

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[fake cough] Because
you have road rage.

103
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I do not have road rage
that much.

104
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[Tina] Yeah. Only on roads.

105
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And in parking lots
and on the bumper cars.

106
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And when we listen to that song
Life is a Highway.

107
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Well, that song is stressful!

108
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But, come on, people,
I'm fine.

109
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Okay, I guess all of our eyes
and ears are wrong.

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Look, I can only give help to those who
are ready to receive it.

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If that's ever you, Linda,
you know where to find me.

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Wait, Nat! I'm making you
a burger, right?

113
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Oh yeah, that just felt like
a cool moment to go.

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It was. It was.

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Everyone hurry!

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I want my butt in the seat before the
movie starts. Capiche?

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I piche.
But I can't find my glasses.

118
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It's so hard to find my glasses
without my glasses.

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Oh my God, Bob.
You done pooping yet?

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[Bob] No, I'm not happy
about it either.

121
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I'm ready when you are.

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Gene. You need pants.

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Okay, boomer.

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Mother, I'm ready
and probably your favorite.

125
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Whoa! What's this mattress
doing out here?

126
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It's Gene's. He spilled
melted butter all over.

127
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[Gene] I needed something to dip my
bedtime artichokes in.

128
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So we're airing it out.

129
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Since it's here, I should probably ride it
down the stairs, right?

130
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No, no. We're leaving.

131
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Also, that's how someone breaks an arm.
We're too poor for that.

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I changed into
my bathing suit.

133
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So if the movie theater has a hot tub,
I will be ready to roll.

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Great. Bob!

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[Bob] Almost done. Sort of.

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[Linda groans]

137
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Just find a stopping place Dad.
It doesn't have to be perfect.

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[all] Whoa!

139
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Damn it. Stupid light.

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Linda, are you sure
you don't want me to drive?

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No offense, Bob but if you drive, we won't
get there until it's over.

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You drive like a nerd.

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Ugh. Why does no one know
how to drive?

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[yells] Move it,
Parker slow-sy!

145
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I don't think you're
supposed to be over here,

146
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this lane is for parking--

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It's fine. It's fine.

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Look, that guy up ahead of us
is doing it too.

149
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We're gonna make it, people!

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-Mom!
-Linda!

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[all yelling]

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[sheepishly] Oh God.
Uh, hi.

153
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Sorry. Sorry.

154
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[gasps] Is she
flipping me off?

155
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-Uh, yep.
-Sassy.

156
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[phone vibrating]

157
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Go for Kinkle.

158
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Nat, it's Linda.

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Linda.
I know why you're calling.

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-You do?
-Yep.

161
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How many bottles of my signature barbecue
sauce should I put you down for?

162
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Oh, uh... N--No,

163
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I was calling about
my road rage.

164
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Oh. Well, I can help you
with that too.

165
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I do have a barbecue sauce
road rage package

166
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I could also offer you.

167
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-Uh...
-Just the road rage? Okay.

168
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[Nat clears throat]

169
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Welcome to Calm in 60 Seconds,

170
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an anti-road rage program
that will have you

171
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driving and smiling in only
five 90-minute sessions.

172
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Now, I know that's a lot longer than
60 seconds but let's be realistic.

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-Right. Right.
-What is road rage

174
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and what are the risks?

175
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Well, there are physical effects in and
upon the rager's body.

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High blood pressure.
Heart disease.

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Digestive issues- I'm talking
road rage diarrhea.

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-Ragarrhea.
-Oh.

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And of course, death.
Which is also pretty bad.

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Another risk, going to jail.

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You ever have a birthday party in jail?
It sucks.

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They sing you
the happy birthday song,

183
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but they add the words "in jail" to the
end of every line,

184
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like--
♪ Happy birthday in jail ♪

185
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-Oh gosh!
-Yeah.

186
00:07:03,131 --> 00:07:06,301
Okay! What causes the rage
in road rage?

187
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Let's pop open the proverbial hood
and take a look inside.

188
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For me, it was a bad boss
that took away my dignity

189
00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:15,226
with every single gosh
damned interaction.

190
00:07:15,310 --> 00:07:17,145
What causes your rage, Linda?

191
00:07:17,228 --> 00:07:18,521
Let's see--

192
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-people that drive too slow...
-Mm.

193
00:07:20,357 --> 00:07:21,775
-People cut me off.
-Okay.

194
00:07:21,858 --> 00:07:23,526
People that drive with the dog
on the lap

195
00:07:23,610 --> 00:07:25,320
and the dog looks at me
like he's better than me

196
00:07:25,403 --> 00:07:26,863
-'cause he's in the driver's seat.
-Okay.

197
00:07:26,946 --> 00:07:28,239
-PT Cruisers!
-Yes.

198
00:07:28,323 --> 00:07:29,532
But let's go deeper.

199
00:07:29,616 --> 00:07:33,203
Where is the anger coming from
in your non-car life.

200
00:07:33,286 --> 00:07:34,412
Huh, I don't know.

201
00:07:34,496 --> 00:07:37,374
I mean, I love my family,
I love the restaurant,

202
00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:39,626
I just got new socks.
Things are good.

203
00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:41,169
Okay, well, how about this...

204
00:07:41,252 --> 00:07:43,922
Do you remember your first experience
with road rage?

205
00:07:44,005 --> 00:07:45,965
Oh, uh, huh...

206
00:07:46,049 --> 00:07:47,801
I guess it was with-- my mom?

207
00:07:47,884 --> 00:07:48,968
Hm, tell me more.

208
00:07:49,052 --> 00:07:52,138
Sometimes when she drove,
she would yell, all the time.

209
00:07:52,222 --> 00:07:54,516
She would yell all the time,
now that I think about it.

210
00:07:54,599 --> 00:07:57,018
She yelled at a pigeon
eating a hot dog bun once.

211
00:07:57,102 --> 00:07:59,396
-He wasn't even driving.
-Mm, interesting.

212
00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:01,147
-Now we're getting somewhere.
-Great.

213
00:08:01,231 --> 00:08:03,191
-Am I cured?
-No, Linda. No, you're not.

214
00:08:03,274 --> 00:08:05,068
-Oh.
-But you are ready

215
00:08:05,235 --> 00:08:06,736
-for burp.
-[Linda] Burp?

216
00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:08,988
It's my method
for overcoming road rage.

217
00:08:09,072 --> 00:08:10,782
B! Breathe.

218
00:08:10,865 --> 00:08:11,908
Then another B!

219
00:08:11,991 --> 00:08:14,035
Become the other driver.

220
00:08:14,119 --> 00:08:15,620
Try to step into their shoes.

221
00:08:15,704 --> 00:08:17,247
U! Unplug.

222
00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:20,917
Unplug from your rage, imagine yourself
somewhere calm.

223
00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:23,461
For me, it's in the hammock
with a little bit of whittling

224
00:08:23,545 --> 00:08:24,963
and just a ton of lizards.

225
00:08:25,046 --> 00:08:26,423
R! Release.

226
00:08:26,506 --> 00:08:28,007
Release that rage.

227
00:08:28,091 --> 00:08:29,592
And then P! Play.

228
00:08:29,676 --> 00:08:31,845
Ground yourself
in the spirit of play.

229
00:08:31,928 --> 00:08:34,597
That could be anything, singing a song,
thinking of a joke.

230
00:08:34,681 --> 00:08:36,725
For me, I like to pretend
my mouth is a trumpet

231
00:08:36,808 --> 00:08:39,102
and I'm doing a little
jazz solo. Like this.

232
00:08:39,185 --> 00:08:41,396
[♪ mimics trumpet]

233
00:08:41,479 --> 00:08:43,398
Wow. That's pretty.

234
00:08:43,481 --> 00:08:45,275
Okay then let's hop
in your car and

235
00:08:45,358 --> 00:08:47,652
turn the page on that rage,
Linda B-word!

236
00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:49,696
So, Linda's at road rage
school, huh?

237
00:08:49,779 --> 00:08:51,614
You know what keeps me
from having road rage?

238
00:08:51,698 --> 00:08:53,742
I just picture all the other cars naked,
you know?

239
00:08:53,825 --> 00:08:56,286
-What do you mean, naked?
-Like nude.

240
00:08:56,369 --> 00:08:57,829
Do I have to
spell it out for you?

241
00:08:57,912 --> 00:08:59,080
Yeah. Yes.

242
00:08:59,164 --> 00:09:02,500
Oh my God. Just picture a car,
then picture it naked.

243
00:09:02,584 --> 00:09:05,378
Car butts. Car boobs.
Car wieners.

244
00:09:05,462 --> 00:09:07,756
-Car wieners?
-Sorry, car penises.

245
00:09:07,839 --> 00:09:08,840
[thud]

246
00:09:08,923 --> 00:09:09,966
What was that sound.

247
00:09:10,050 --> 00:09:11,676
Sounded like it came
from the apartment.

248
00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:14,179
The kids said they had homework
they really wanted to finish

249
00:09:14,262 --> 00:09:17,557
which, now that I think about it, should
have been a huge red flag.

250
00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:19,309
-[kids yelling]
-[thud]

251
00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:22,353
Okay, will you watch the restaurant
for a minute, Teddy?

252
00:09:22,520 --> 00:09:25,190
Uh, what if someone comes in
What do I say?

253
00:09:25,273 --> 00:09:26,775
Do I have to say,
Burgers for sale?

254
00:09:26,858 --> 00:09:28,526
-No, you don't.
-Somethin' like that?

255
00:09:28,610 --> 00:09:30,361
Just-- I'll be right back.

256
00:09:30,987 --> 00:09:33,865
Okay. If you love me,
push me down the stairs!

257
00:09:34,532 --> 00:09:36,159
[Gene and Bob yell]

258
00:09:36,242 --> 00:09:38,036
You can't yell at me
if I'm sleeping.

259
00:09:38,161 --> 00:09:39,204
[fake snores]

260
00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:40,622
Gene. Kids, come on.

261
00:09:40,705 --> 00:09:43,666
Mom told you she didn't want you riding
down the stairs on the mattress.

262
00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:45,085
Are you sure she didn't say

263
00:09:45,168 --> 00:09:47,545
"I'd love it if you rode down
the stairs on the mattress."

264
00:09:47,629 --> 00:09:48,880
I can hear her saying that.

265
00:09:48,963 --> 00:09:51,424
No Let's just stop
before anybody gets hurt.

266
00:09:51,508 --> 00:09:53,134
More than I just got hurt.

267
00:09:53,218 --> 00:09:57,972
Dad. I feel like maybe you're not taking
into account how much fun this is.

268
00:09:58,056 --> 00:10:00,183
Yeah, I finally get
having stairs.

269
00:10:00,266 --> 00:10:01,893
Before, It just wasn't
clicking for me.

270
00:10:01,976 --> 00:10:04,437
Okay, great. Well, it's time to
go back to work.

271
00:10:04,562 --> 00:10:06,606
Dad, listen, just try it once.

272
00:10:06,689 --> 00:10:09,275
And if you don't love it, then we'll stop
and come back to work.

273
00:10:09,359 --> 00:10:11,194
But we'll be good
at work this time.

274
00:10:11,277 --> 00:10:14,114
Guys, I'm not sliding down
the stairs on Gene's mattress.

275
00:10:14,322 --> 00:10:16,699
[Bob yells]

276
00:10:16,783 --> 00:10:17,867
Uh-oh!

277
00:10:17,951 --> 00:10:19,035
Again!

278
00:10:19,119 --> 00:10:20,328
[children] Yay.

279
00:10:20,453 --> 00:10:23,456
Okay, Linda. I'm going to
deliberately place you

280
00:10:23,540 --> 00:10:26,376
in one of the most maddening driving
environments in the world.

281
00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:28,128
[Linda]
Oh God, the airport?

282
00:10:28,211 --> 00:10:29,879
[Nat] Yep, the belly of
the beast.

283
00:10:29,963 --> 00:10:31,214
[Linda groans]

284
00:10:31,297 --> 00:10:34,843
[Nat] Your directive is to get into the
far right lane as soon as possible.

285
00:10:34,926 --> 00:10:37,303
Okay. Well, I'm not
actually flying anywhere

286
00:10:37,387 --> 00:10:39,222
so I think I should be
able to stay calm and

287
00:10:39,305 --> 00:10:41,224
oh my God,
what is this guy doing?

288
00:10:41,307 --> 00:10:42,475
Use the steps, Linda.

289
00:10:42,559 --> 00:10:44,352
Burp. First step, breathe.

290
00:10:44,435 --> 00:10:45,520
Okay.

291
00:10:45,812 --> 00:10:47,522
[breathes]

292
00:10:47,605 --> 00:10:49,065
Oh, look at this guy.

293
00:10:49,149 --> 00:10:50,483
[sarcastically]
Oh, sure, sure.

294
00:10:50,567 --> 00:10:53,945
Second B-- become the other driver.
Put yourself in their shoes.

295
00:10:54,028 --> 00:10:55,822
Maybe there's a reason they're
kind of alf in

296
00:10:55,905 --> 00:10:57,574
hand half out of our lane like that.

297
00:10:57,657 --> 00:10:58,700
Because they're dumb?

298
00:10:58,783 --> 00:11:00,410
Well, what's the answer?
You are them.

299
00:11:00,493 --> 00:11:03,663
-I'm dumb.
-Okay. Or maybe you're a little tired.

300
00:11:03,746 --> 00:11:05,790
Maybe you were up all night
baking pastries

301
00:11:05,874 --> 00:11:08,293
-for a bake sale to help end poverty.
-Aw.

302
00:11:08,835 --> 00:11:10,211
-Son of a bitch.
-Okay.

303
00:11:10,295 --> 00:11:12,505
U! Unplug!
Where's your calm place?

304
00:11:12,630 --> 00:11:14,924
-Uh... The mall?
-Maybe calmer.

305
00:11:15,008 --> 00:11:17,093
The bathroom at the mall?
It's nice.

306
00:11:17,177 --> 00:11:19,179
I'll have to check that out.
Let's go with that.

307
00:11:19,262 --> 00:11:22,182
Now, R! Release the rage
There it goes.

308
00:11:22,265 --> 00:11:23,308
Bye bye! Out the window.

309
00:11:23,391 --> 00:11:24,684
Picture it floating away.

310
00:11:24,767 --> 00:11:26,186
But don't close
your eyes, Linda.

311
00:11:26,269 --> 00:11:27,270
Oh. Right. Sorry.

312
00:11:27,353 --> 00:11:29,480
[Linda] Come on,
someone let me in!

313
00:11:29,564 --> 00:11:31,232
Now go to P. Play.

314
00:11:31,316 --> 00:11:33,276
Feel free to use
the mouth trumpet if you want.

315
00:11:33,359 --> 00:11:34,861
Uhhh.

316
00:11:34,944 --> 00:11:38,072
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

317
00:11:38,156 --> 00:11:40,742
That's more of a trombone. Have you never
heard live music?

318
00:11:40,825 --> 00:11:43,203
You know what? If it works for you,
that's what matters.

319
00:11:43,286 --> 00:11:46,039
-[car honks in background]
-Argh! Honk me. Honk you!

320
00:11:46,164 --> 00:11:47,832
[horn honking]

321
00:11:48,166 --> 00:11:50,710
-Sorry.
-That's okay. It's okay. It's all right.

322
00:11:50,793 --> 00:11:53,588
This is just day one
of a five day journey.

323
00:11:53,671 --> 00:11:56,883
I know you'll get better.

324
00:11:56,966 --> 00:11:59,219
-Linda, please stop honking.
-Right, right.

325
00:11:59,302 --> 00:12:00,470
[honks]

326
00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:02,305
-[Tina and Linda yelling]
-♪ Ragey driving ♪

327
00:12:02,388 --> 00:12:03,473
[♪ upbeat music playing]

328
00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:05,475
♪ Mattress riding ♪

329
00:12:05,558 --> 00:12:07,018
[Bob and Linda yelling]

330
00:12:07,101 --> 00:12:08,937
♪ Ragey driving ♪

331
00:12:09,020 --> 00:12:10,563
Watch where you're going?

332
00:12:10,647 --> 00:12:12,649
♪ Mattress riding ♪

333
00:12:13,399 --> 00:12:14,817
♪ Ragey driving ♪

334
00:12:14,901 --> 00:12:16,486
-[tires screech]
-Ugh!

335
00:12:16,569 --> 00:12:18,029
[Bob yelling]

336
00:12:18,154 --> 00:12:20,573
Well, I'm off to my last
session with Nat.

337
00:12:20,657 --> 00:12:21,783
Wish me luck, I guess.

338
00:12:21,866 --> 00:12:23,368
Oh... Do you think
it's not working?

339
00:12:23,451 --> 00:12:25,536
Because you sound like
you think it's not working.

340
00:12:25,620 --> 00:12:29,707
I mean, it's going great except for how
mad I still am at the cars all the time.

341
00:12:29,791 --> 00:12:31,167
It might be genetic.

342
00:12:31,251 --> 00:12:33,461
My mom was a honker,
and now I'm a honker.

343
00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:35,255
She passed her
honkers on to you.

344
00:12:35,338 --> 00:12:38,424
I mean, sounds to me like you
need more sessions with Nat.

345
00:12:38,508 --> 00:12:39,509
Maybe lots more.

346
00:12:39,592 --> 00:12:41,386
Preferably after school,
but before dinner.

347
00:12:41,469 --> 00:12:43,471
No reason we don't do anything
when you're gone.

348
00:12:43,554 --> 00:12:45,306
-What?
-[Bob and children] Nothing.

349
00:12:45,390 --> 00:12:46,766
Bob , Why did you say nothing?

350
00:12:46,849 --> 00:12:47,934
Because they did.

351
00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:49,310
I don't know.
What do you mean?

352
00:12:49,394 --> 00:12:53,064
I don't-- I didn't-- I don't know what
our kids are talking about.

353
00:12:53,147 --> 00:12:54,524
They're so weird, right?

354
00:12:54,607 --> 00:12:57,694
Anyway, bye. I mean, Go get 'em, Lin.
You can do this.

355
00:12:57,777 --> 00:12:59,195
So get out of here.

356
00:12:59,279 --> 00:13:00,947
To do.-- To... do it.

357
00:13:01,030 --> 00:13:03,908
You know what? Maybe you're right.
I can stop raging.

358
00:13:03,992 --> 00:13:07,078
I can do anything as long
as I believe in myself.

359
00:13:07,203 --> 00:13:09,455
What the hell are you
doing?

360
00:13:09,539 --> 00:13:11,291
Linda, please pull over.

361
00:13:11,374 --> 00:13:12,875
I'm sorry, Nat, but you saw

362
00:13:12,959 --> 00:13:14,669
-that guy almost clipped me.
-Hmm-hmm.

363
00:13:14,752 --> 00:13:17,839
And then the guy in the bike,
a bike is not a car, Nat.

364
00:13:17,922 --> 00:13:20,300
A bike is not a car. You are right
about that, Linda.

365
00:13:20,383 --> 00:13:21,592
And that chicken truck.

366
00:13:21,676 --> 00:13:23,761
Since when does our town
have chicken truck?

367
00:13:23,845 --> 00:13:25,847
I swear, those chickens
were laughing at me.

368
00:13:25,930 --> 00:13:28,516
Linda, I've never had to
say this to a client.

369
00:13:28,599 --> 00:13:30,101
But I don't think
I can help you.

370
00:13:30,184 --> 00:13:32,854
-No, Nat! No!
-I'm sorry, Linda.

371
00:13:32,937 --> 00:13:34,063
Now let's switch places.

372
00:13:34,147 --> 00:13:36,399
And I'll drive you safely home
and do my best

373
00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:38,151
to hide my disappointment.

374
00:13:38,276 --> 00:13:39,736
[sighs] So disappointed.

375
00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:41,070
-[tires screech]
-[Nat] Whoa!

376
00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:44,073
Okay, that car just
totally cut me off.

377
00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:45,700
I'm gonna remain calm and--

378
00:13:45,783 --> 00:13:47,452
Oh my Guadalajara!

379
00:13:47,535 --> 00:13:49,579
That's. That's Ronnie Glow!

380
00:13:49,662 --> 00:13:51,164
What the-- Really?

381
00:13:51,247 --> 00:13:53,750
That's him, Linda.
I'd know that car anywhere.

382
00:13:53,916 --> 00:13:56,252
He called it,
the Glowsmobile.

383
00:13:56,335 --> 00:13:57,712
It's okay. It's okay.

384
00:13:57,795 --> 00:13:59,380
I gotta do the steps. Breathe.

385
00:13:59,505 --> 00:14:01,632
[angry loud breath]

386
00:14:01,716 --> 00:14:03,468
Become. Become Ronny Glow!

387
00:14:03,551 --> 00:14:06,095
So I'm a terrible monster
who should be destroyed!

388
00:14:06,220 --> 00:14:07,930
-Aah!
-Aah! Nat?

389
00:14:08,014 --> 00:14:09,265
Tighten your seatbelt, Linda.

390
00:14:09,348 --> 00:14:10,933
It's about to glow down!

391
00:14:11,017 --> 00:14:12,810
I don't know how
to tighten my seatbelt.

392
00:14:12,894 --> 00:14:13,895
Oh God!

393
00:14:16,147 --> 00:14:18,441
I got you now,
you tan little man.

394
00:14:18,524 --> 00:14:21,986
Nat, I thought you were zen. I thought you
conquered your age.

395
00:14:22,070 --> 00:14:24,363
It was always simmering
just below the surface.

396
00:14:24,447 --> 00:14:25,990
Our rage is who we are!

397
00:14:26,074 --> 00:14:27,408
Right. But, uh...

398
00:14:27,492 --> 00:14:28,910
I'm coming for you, Ronnie.

399
00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:30,828
Like a gnat out of hell.

400
00:14:30,912 --> 00:14:32,163
[yells angrily]

401
00:14:32,246 --> 00:14:33,706
Uh... What if--

402
00:14:33,790 --> 00:14:36,542
What if Ronnie Glow's been
baking pastries for poverty?

403
00:14:36,626 --> 00:14:37,835
There is no poverty.

404
00:14:37,919 --> 00:14:39,212
-I made that up.
-What?

405
00:14:39,295 --> 00:14:40,963
You got any food in here
I can throw?

406
00:14:41,047 --> 00:14:42,590
Nat, eyes on the road!

407
00:14:42,673 --> 00:14:44,801
Oh, wow! There's lots
of food back here.

408
00:14:44,884 --> 00:14:47,136
You really don't care
about this car, huh?

409
00:14:47,220 --> 00:14:50,389
Half-eaten granola bar!
Crunch on this, you bastard!

410
00:14:50,556 --> 00:14:51,557
[Nat grunts]

411
00:14:51,641 --> 00:14:53,351
-What a rush!
-Oh God!

412
00:14:53,434 --> 00:14:55,686
-Apple core.
-Someone in my family ate an apple?

413
00:14:55,770 --> 00:14:56,813
Whoo!

414
00:14:56,896 --> 00:14:58,606
I'm glad I didn't
cure you, Linda.

415
00:14:58,689 --> 00:15:01,234
I think you cured me.
I'm back, baby!

416
00:15:01,317 --> 00:15:03,945
-No Nat, no!
-Yes, Linda, yes!

417
00:15:04,028 --> 00:15:06,489
Hold on tight
We're going to Tokyo Drift!

418
00:15:06,614 --> 00:15:08,616
[Linda yells]

419
00:15:09,033 --> 00:15:10,076
No kids again, huh?

420
00:15:10,159 --> 00:15:11,577
Yeah, they're up
in the apartment.

421
00:15:11,661 --> 00:15:13,496
-They love homework now.
-[phone ringing]

422
00:15:13,579 --> 00:15:15,039
-Huh?
-Yep, they're

423
00:15:15,123 --> 00:15:16,415
they're getting really smart.

424
00:15:16,499 --> 00:15:18,501
-Bob's Burgers.
-Dad, you've got to get up here.

425
00:15:18,584 --> 00:15:20,169
We're taking it
to the next level.

426
00:15:20,253 --> 00:15:21,379
Hmm.
What's the next level?

427
00:15:21,462 --> 00:15:23,589
Stop asking questions
and move your ass!

428
00:15:23,673 --> 00:15:25,591
Oh, and you gotta come through
the fire escape.

429
00:15:25,675 --> 00:15:26,801
Front door is not
an option.

430
00:15:26,884 --> 00:15:29,470
Okay, I'm nervous, but I'm really excited.
I'll be right there.

431
00:15:29,554 --> 00:15:30,721
Teddy, watch the restaurant.

432
00:15:30,805 --> 00:15:32,265
-I'll be right back.
-Okay.

433
00:15:33,349 --> 00:15:34,809
You hear that? I'm in charge.

434
00:15:34,892 --> 00:15:36,435
He picked me, not you.

435
00:15:36,519 --> 00:15:38,896
I'm his best friend. But I don't think
it was biased.

436
00:15:38,980 --> 00:15:41,774
I think he just picked me because I'm the
right guy for the job, you know.

437
00:15:41,858 --> 00:15:43,943
And I've done it before.
He asked me before, so.

438
00:15:44,026 --> 00:15:46,487
Okay, fine.
You can be my assistant.

439
00:15:46,737 --> 00:15:47,864
Oh, my God.

440
00:15:47,947 --> 00:15:49,782
[Louise] I told you.
It's the next level.

441
00:15:49,866 --> 00:15:50,908
[Gene] Drink it in bruh!

442
00:15:50,992 --> 00:15:53,411
You ready to fly like a cheetah?
On a mattress?

443
00:15:53,494 --> 00:15:55,913
-Please don't call me bruh!
-You got it, bruh.

444
00:15:55,997 --> 00:15:57,248
Okay, wait. Maybe I like it.

445
00:15:57,331 --> 00:15:59,500
But guys, this seems so,
so dangerous.

446
00:15:59,584 --> 00:16:00,626
What's your point, bruh?

447
00:16:00,710 --> 00:16:04,630
It feels-- I'm gonna say wrong of me to
support this as your parent.

448
00:16:04,714 --> 00:16:05,756
[children] Oh.

449
00:16:05,840 --> 00:16:08,968
But what if we put another mattress
against the door down there

450
00:16:09,051 --> 00:16:10,386
and then I'm a great parent?

451
00:16:10,469 --> 00:16:11,762
-Yes Dad!
-Yaayy!

452
00:16:11,846 --> 00:16:14,140
And then let's all ride
together for maximum velocity.

453
00:16:14,223 --> 00:16:15,266
There he is.

454
00:16:15,349 --> 00:16:17,977
And also we gotta clean all this up
before your mom gets back.

455
00:16:18,060 --> 00:16:20,521
If we live, you've got
yourself a deal, bruh!

456
00:16:20,605 --> 00:16:21,606
[loud thuds]

457
00:16:21,689 --> 00:16:24,317
-[Bob and children yelling]
-[loud thuds and door cracks]

458
00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:25,776
[Bob] Oh God!

459
00:16:26,110 --> 00:16:28,404
Oh oh! Bob! Bob!

460
00:16:28,487 --> 00:16:29,488
I gotta go over there.

461
00:16:29,572 --> 00:16:31,407
You're in charge now.
Watch the restaurant.

462
00:16:31,490 --> 00:16:35,036
If anyone comes in, you just say
"Burgers for sale" like we practiced.

463
00:16:35,620 --> 00:16:37,580
If you don't want to glow,
you gotta go

464
00:16:37,663 --> 00:16:38,998
if you don't wanna glow--

465
00:16:39,081 --> 00:16:42,001
Okay, so the quiet seething
and the muttering

466
00:16:42,084 --> 00:16:45,838
and the following is a little more scary
than the yelling and the throwing was.

467
00:16:45,922 --> 00:16:47,423
-[Nat] Uh huh.
-What are we...

468
00:16:47,506 --> 00:16:49,550
What are we gonna do
when you catch up to him?

469
00:16:49,634 --> 00:16:51,093
We'll see now, won't we?

470
00:16:51,177 --> 00:16:52,678
-[sighs]
-Whoa!

471
00:16:53,054 --> 00:16:54,931
He's heading for the ferry.

472
00:16:55,014 --> 00:16:56,807
Oh well,
I guess that's it then.

473
00:16:56,891 --> 00:16:58,935
Because we're not getting
on the ferry, right?

474
00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:00,895
-[Nat grunts]
-Oh, we're getting on the ferry.

475
00:17:00,978 --> 00:17:03,522
Yes we are.
You're mine now, Ronnie.

476
00:17:03,773 --> 00:17:05,233
[Linda] Oh God! Oh, boy!

477
00:17:05,399 --> 00:17:06,817
Whoa, Nat!

478
00:17:06,901 --> 00:17:09,362
That is very close.

479
00:17:09,445 --> 00:17:11,864
[angrily] You like that,
Ronnie? You like that?

480
00:17:11,948 --> 00:17:13,616
Oh my God, Nat,
what are you doing?

481
00:17:13,699 --> 00:17:14,909
You're pushing his car!

482
00:17:14,992 --> 00:17:17,787
Nat, you're pushing his car! You gonna
push him right over the edge.

483
00:17:17,870 --> 00:17:19,455
Yep, he's going inland.

484
00:17:19,538 --> 00:17:22,083
Ronnie Glow is about
to become Billy Ocean.

485
00:17:22,458 --> 00:17:24,710
-[laughs maniacally]
-[Linda groans]

486
00:17:27,755 --> 00:17:29,340
[Linda] Oh God,
this isn't good.

487
00:17:29,423 --> 00:17:32,051
Oh, Nat you gotta try
your steps again.

488
00:17:32,134 --> 00:17:33,553
You gotta do your burps.

489
00:17:33,678 --> 00:17:35,304
-Uh, Breathe.
-No.

490
00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:37,139
-Uh, Become.
-Uh-uh.

491
00:17:37,223 --> 00:17:39,350
-[Linda] Unplug?
-[Nat] Hell, no.

492
00:17:39,517 --> 00:17:41,519
Do your trumpet.
Here, I'll start.

493
00:17:41,602 --> 00:17:43,854
[nervously mimics
trumpet sound]

494
00:17:43,938 --> 00:17:45,022
No, Linda, no!

495
00:17:45,106 --> 00:17:48,526
I'm gonna push Ronnie over the edge
just like he did to me.

496
00:17:48,609 --> 00:17:51,279
Oh no, you're gonna kill the guy.
We're killing a guy.

497
00:17:51,362 --> 00:17:54,323
It's me, Ronnie. Nat Kinkle.

498
00:17:54,407 --> 00:17:55,491
Nat , don't do it.

499
00:17:55,575 --> 00:17:58,369
Oh, I'm doing it. This is raw.
This is real.

500
00:17:58,452 --> 00:18:01,664
It's in me and it's in you
and it was in your mom.

501
00:18:01,747 --> 00:18:04,083
She was right all along
about everything.

502
00:18:04,166 --> 00:18:05,418
May she rest in peace.

503
00:18:05,501 --> 00:18:06,794
[engine revving]

504
00:18:06,877 --> 00:18:08,337
[frantically] She's not dead.

505
00:18:08,421 --> 00:18:11,465
And I definitely wouldn't say my mother's
right about everything.

506
00:18:11,549 --> 00:18:12,800
She was just so angry!

507
00:18:12,883 --> 00:18:14,093
In and out of the car!

508
00:18:14,176 --> 00:18:17,138
And I think that's because
she was a very unhappy person!

509
00:18:17,221 --> 00:18:19,098
But maybe-- we shouldn't
talk about this

510
00:18:19,181 --> 00:18:20,975
while you're pushing someone
into the ocean.

511
00:18:21,058 --> 00:18:22,518
No, it's fine.
I can multitask.

512
00:18:22,602 --> 00:18:24,312
[Nat groans] I'm barely
listening to you.

513
00:18:24,437 --> 00:18:25,438
[tires screech]

514
00:18:25,605 --> 00:18:26,981
[Nat groans]

515
00:18:27,064 --> 00:18:28,065
Nat, stop!

516
00:18:28,149 --> 00:18:29,984
Before, when you asked me
what I was mad at,

517
00:18:30,067 --> 00:18:33,070
I guess-- I'm mad at my mom
for being mad at her life.

518
00:18:33,154 --> 00:18:34,697
'Cause that life
had me in it--

519
00:18:34,780 --> 00:18:37,867
and I wanted that to be
enough to make her not mad.

520
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:39,076
But now that I know that,

521
00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:41,078
maybe I could
start to let it go.

522
00:18:41,162 --> 00:18:44,957
And the next time I get mad, I can just
picture my family happy in the backseat

523
00:18:45,041 --> 00:18:47,251
and my mom bound and
gagged in the trunk.

524
00:18:47,335 --> 00:18:48,878
Or maybe not bound and gagged.

525
00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:50,379
But definitely in the trunk.

526
00:18:50,463 --> 00:18:53,466
So I'm gonna let you borrow
that image for Ronnie Glow.

527
00:18:53,716 --> 00:18:55,760
Okay? We can let go.

528
00:18:55,843 --> 00:18:57,553
See? There it goes.

529
00:18:57,637 --> 00:18:58,721
Bye, Rage.

530
00:19:02,642 --> 00:19:06,896
[♪ mimics trumpet sound]

531
00:19:06,979 --> 00:19:08,481
Congratulations, Linda.

532
00:19:08,564 --> 00:19:10,066
-You're cured.
-Huh?

533
00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:12,652
Well, not cured
but on the road to recovery.

534
00:19:12,735 --> 00:19:14,403
Wait, what's going on?

535
00:19:14,654 --> 00:19:16,155
[honks]

536
00:19:16,781 --> 00:19:18,449
That's not Ronnie Glow,
Linda.

537
00:19:18,532 --> 00:19:20,660
That's my fellow limo driver,
Kristof.

538
00:19:20,743 --> 00:19:23,454
He owes me one.
I saved his life in Vietnam.

539
00:19:23,537 --> 00:19:25,414
We were bungee jumping.
It's a long story.

540
00:19:25,498 --> 00:19:28,376
-What? This was all fake?
-Yep, yep, it was.

541
00:19:28,459 --> 00:19:29,960
It did work though, didn't it?

542
00:19:30,044 --> 00:19:32,505
What about the chain?
We broke the ferry,

543
00:19:32,588 --> 00:19:34,924
I arranged that, thanks
to my other friend, Sandra.

544
00:19:35,007 --> 00:19:36,342
She's the ferry captain.

545
00:19:36,425 --> 00:19:39,136
I didn't save her life,
but I did save her cat's life

546
00:19:39,220 --> 00:19:40,888
by feeding it
while she was out of town.

547
00:19:40,971 --> 00:19:42,723
I can't believe
you did all this.

548
00:19:42,807 --> 00:19:45,768
Well, you're the ragiest road rager
I've ever worked with, Linda.

549
00:19:45,851 --> 00:19:47,728
But I never give up
on a client.

550
00:19:47,812 --> 00:19:49,397
And so I had to get
a little creative.

551
00:19:49,480 --> 00:19:51,649
Well, I can't wait to get home

552
00:19:51,732 --> 00:19:53,567
and tell Bob and the
kids about this.

553
00:19:53,651 --> 00:19:56,195
Oh, I bet! You just got
45 more minutes

554
00:19:56,278 --> 00:19:57,697
on the ferry going this way

555
00:19:57,780 --> 00:20:00,741
and then a 30 minute
wait and then 45 minutes back.

556
00:20:00,825 --> 00:20:03,077
[Linda] Right. Right.
I'd better call Bob.

557
00:20:03,911 --> 00:20:06,872
Uh, how much longer is it gonna take you
to fix the door, Teddy?

558
00:20:06,956 --> 00:20:08,499
Linda will be back any minute.

559
00:20:08,582 --> 00:20:10,167
[Teddy] I don't know
when I'll be done, Bob.

560
00:20:10,251 --> 00:20:12,086
I don't know.
I don't know. Wait. I'm done.

561
00:20:12,169 --> 00:20:14,797
Oh God, they're back. Hide the tools!
Hide the tools!

562
00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:17,591
What-- What do I do? Where do I put 'em?
Do I swallow 'em?

563
00:20:17,675 --> 00:20:19,176
Agh! Agh!

564
00:20:20,386 --> 00:20:23,431
Hello, Robert.
May I present your new wife?

565
00:20:23,514 --> 00:20:25,391
Send her back, Dad.
Ask for a redhead.

566
00:20:25,474 --> 00:20:27,601
I got an A plus in rage class.

567
00:20:27,685 --> 00:20:29,145
Uh, you got a C minus.

568
00:20:29,228 --> 00:20:30,938
Well, I passed
with flying colors.

569
00:20:31,021 --> 00:20:32,189
Squeaked by. Squeaked by.

570
00:20:32,273 --> 00:20:34,316
Still a possible hazard
to herself and others.

571
00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:35,401
Yay, Mom.

572
00:20:35,484 --> 00:20:36,986
I feel like celebrating.

573
00:20:37,069 --> 00:20:38,779
Let's do something fun.
But cheap.

574
00:20:38,863 --> 00:20:40,531
Any ideas for fun,
cheap stuff?

575
00:20:40,614 --> 00:20:41,741
Play with dad's boobs.

576
00:20:41,824 --> 00:20:43,701
Or... should we tell her?

577
00:20:43,784 --> 00:20:44,869
Tell me what?

578
00:20:44,952 --> 00:20:46,495
I'm scared. I'm scared.

579
00:20:46,579 --> 00:20:48,539
I've got you, Linda. Send us.

580
00:20:48,831 --> 00:20:50,958
[Linda and Nat yell]

581
00:20:51,834 --> 00:20:54,420
[♪ vocalizing]