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- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -
-- for www.addic7ed.com --
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- Unbelievable.
- What's unbelievable?
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My skin? I've been moisturizing.
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I think dad's talking about
the gigantic stage they built
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in front of our restaurant
for the block party.
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- Oh.
- But nice skin, Gene.
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00:00:31,753 --> 00:00:33,920
- It's really shiny.
- Even on my heinie.
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They were supposed to
build it in front of Mort's.
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We were gonna have a
perfect view of the stage.
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I'll bet Mort
pulled some strings.
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Embalmed all the right people.
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I was actually looking
forward to this block party.
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I like The Soul Breezers.
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Soul Breezers? Isn't
that the wine cooler
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mom complains she can't find anymore?
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No, The Soul Breezers, the band.
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They've been around since the '70s.
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Kind of inspiring that
they've been going that long.
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Even though they haven't
had a hit since back then.
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Well, they really only had the one hit.
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- What was the hit?
- It was called "gas in my car."
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♪ Gas, gas, in, in ♪
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♪ my, my, car, car ♪
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♪ I'm gonna get to
you. ♪ pretty romantic.
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Also there was a gas crisis back then,
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so it worked on a lot of levels.
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I only count one level.
Oh, wait, two. Nice.
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Well, I am in a crisis
right now, father.
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Our living room window was supposed
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to look out onto the stage.
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The best seats in the house,
literally. And I sold tickets.
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You did what?
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Yeah, there are kids
who will pay good money
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to watch a free concert from up there.
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- Three kids.
- Four if you count
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Andy and Ollie as separate people.
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Wait, why are kids
coming to our living room
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to see a band from the '70s?
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Dad, these are children who
have never seen a concert before.
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All I had to tell them was, the
higher above the stage you are,
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the more glorious the experience.
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And that our living room was
gonna be like a luxury box,
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with unobstructed views at one
of the premier outdoor events
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to be held in our lifetimes.
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- The bidding was fierce.
- What'd you charge them?
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Let's just say they have candy,
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I have enamel that
needs to be dissolved.
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- We made an arrangement.
- Mm.
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And I'm helping out in
exchange for ten percent.
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Which means I get to
bite off ten percent
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of each piece of candy.
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- Gross but fair.
- But now we're screwed.
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I just looked at the stage
from every window upstairs,
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and the only way you can see
at all is by squeezing your face
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00:02:05,096 --> 00:02:06,429
against the window in Gene's room
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and closing one eye
while you stand on tiptoe.
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It also helps to hold your
breath, or the glass fogs up.
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So, you have to close
one eye and not breathe.
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Sounds like a good time.
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Well, I'm gonna make the most of today.
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I've always been one of those
people that claps at concerts...
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The two concerts that I've been to,
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one of which I stood outside of...
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But today I might try out a whoo.
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- Whoo.
- Eh.
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- Whoo... ?
- Hmm.
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- Whoo-oo-oo.
- Getting there?
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- Sort of.
- You know what?
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This-this will be good.
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We'll get a little business maybe,
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and The Soul Breezers are great.
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And hearing them but not seeing them
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will be fine.
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Just like listening to
a record that's playing
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on speakers that are
facing away from us.
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Well, I'm mad at The Soul Breezers.
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I know it's not their
fault, but I still am.
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- They're just too breezy.
- Hey. Don't mind me.
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I'm just grabbing some buns
for Little King Trashmouth.
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And a coffee. For me. The
king only drinks decaf.
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And wine. Full-bodied reds.
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- How's he doing?
- You've been out there all morning.
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Yeah. I'm pretty sure you love us
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more than that raccoon,
but sometimes I wonder.
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I'm okay with little king
trashmouth being her favorite.
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He has those expressive
hands. Like Jeff Goldblum.
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Oh, hush. Of course
I love you guys more.
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Pretty sure. No, no, I do, I do.
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- Phew.
- The King's hanging in there.
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I don't know if his paw is
broken or sprained or what.
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Damn it, why didn't I study
to be a raccoon doctor?
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That world is so cutthroat.
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- Okay, I'm going back out.
- I'm gonna go with you.
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I don't want Little
King Trashmouth to think
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I only show up for him
during the good times.
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Well, we better go upstairs
to try to put some lipstick
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on this block party poop show.
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Figure out which pieces
of laundry in your room
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are too terrible to leave lying around.
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Not the ones you'd expect.
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Okay, just, everybody remember
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that we are also running
a restaurant today.
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Right? And I'm gonna need some help
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because I don't know...
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How long your mom's gonna be doing....
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raccoon stuff.
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- Tina, where are you going?
- To...
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check on Little King Trashmouth?
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Okay, but you're coming back, right?
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- Yup, yup, totally.
- Tina?
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Not the last you've seen of old Tina.
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Okay, bye.
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And then he was alone.
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- Poor guy.
- Yeah, licking his hurt paw.
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I don't think that's gonna fix it, king.
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He's sweet, but he's dumb.
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I saw him limp in there.
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I can't think of a sadder thing
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than that little guy limping.
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Oh, I just thought of one.
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Ooh, I just thought of another one.
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Ooh. Ooh, they're coming
fast and furious. Ooh.
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Hi, Mr. Huggins.
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He's holding it together,
but he's hurting.
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- Where do you think Gary is?
- I don't know.
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Off on one of his
raccoon business trips?
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I know they're not
really business trips,
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but that's what I call them
when he goes to other dumpsters.
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Well, hopefully he comes back soon.
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Little King Trashmouth needs
his support network right now.
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- Who's Gary, again?
- Little King Trashmouth's husband.
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Oh, crap. I've been calling him Greg.
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The names are close. I'm
sure he gets that a lot.
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Well, we got to help this little guy.
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We got to stay focused. You, too, king.
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Licking your paw. Less
licking, more kicking.
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- He gets it.
- Does he?
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He didn't like the buns.
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Should I get him soup?
That's nice when you're sick.
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No, I'm not gonna get him soup.
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I'll find something.
Oh, also, I'm gonna pee.
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- Okay, Linda.
- Sounds good.
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Thanks for not peeing in the alley.
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It's always nice when someone down there
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resists the temptation.
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One candy, two candy, three candy.
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You, sir, are good to go.
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Also, you're early.
You're the first one here.
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But it's fine. We can seat you now.
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00:04:58,914 --> 00:05:01,039
Dad says you should
never miss the opener.
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They're the stars of tomorrow, today.
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Besides, it's my first
concert. I'm so pumped.
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Yeah, well, it's gonna be great.
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- Right this way, sir.
- Ah, yes. Our Usher.
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Welcome to the premium
platinum superfan suite,
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aka rump-shakers' paradise.
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Huh. Can you see the
band at all from up here?
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Of course you can. You just have to...
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Smush your face to the side
of the window, like so...
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See?
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- Oh.
- Right?
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- Uh-huh.
- It's like you're practically onstage.
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- I-I guess.
- Sometimes I nap like this.
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I'm back. I got a pickle.
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Let's see if raccoons like pickles.
166
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A pickle a day is,
um, good for raccoons?
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00:05:36,539 --> 00:05:37,746
Also, I made a call.
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I felt like we should
bring in a professional
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to help out our little king.
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- Who'd you call?
- Animal control.
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I figure they'll know what to do.
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Wait, you called animal control?
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- Yeah, why?
- What did you say to 'em?
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I just told them about the hurt paw,
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00:05:48,820 --> 00:05:50,774
and they asked if the
animal seemed lethargic,
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and I said, "yeah, kinda,
I mean his paw is hurt.
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- Wouldn't you be, too?"
- Hmm.
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- What?
- Uh,
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animal control isn't who you call
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when you want to help an animal.
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They're more in the business
of dealing with animals.
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00:06:01,726 --> 00:06:03,309
That's why they call it "control."
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00:06:03,334 --> 00:06:05,186
"Dealing" with animals?
What do you mean?
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Like disciplining them?
Giving them time-outs?
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00:06:07,190 --> 00:06:08,773
No, like...
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00:06:08,798 --> 00:06:09,880
- Wait, what?!
- No.
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00:06:09,905 --> 00:06:11,234
I think that's right, yeah.
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I've seen 'em on when animals attack!
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They have a lot of nets.
190
00:06:14,345 --> 00:06:15,864
And a lot of sticks with the loops.
191
00:06:15,888 --> 00:06:18,157
And a lot of tranquilizer darts.
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00:06:18,182 --> 00:06:20,428
And then the animal
just goes night-night.
193
00:06:20,453 --> 00:06:22,036
Wh-wh-why would they do that?
194
00:06:22,061 --> 00:06:24,265
Oh, my god. They said they'd
send someone right away.
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Call back! Call back!
196
00:06:26,441 --> 00:06:28,895
Ooh. There's the first band.
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00:06:29,208 --> 00:06:31,583
Whoo... I'll-I'll work on it.
198
00:06:35,165 --> 00:06:36,593
Well, can't you just tell
199
00:06:36,618 --> 00:06:37,928
the animal control officers not to come?
200
00:06:37,952 --> 00:06:39,280
I-I don't think it was a raccoon.
201
00:06:39,305 --> 00:06:41,825
At all. Uh, I think
it was just a... a wig.
202
00:06:41,850 --> 00:06:43,975
Someone's old wig shaking in the wind.
203
00:06:44,060 --> 00:06:46,894
What? No, you don't
understand how this works.
204
00:06:46,919 --> 00:06:48,873
Wait, don't hang up.
205
00:06:48,898 --> 00:06:51,190
Why? Why... ?
206
00:06:51,215 --> 00:06:52,673
How'd it go?
207
00:06:52,698 --> 00:06:53,568
It's happening.
208
00:06:53,593 --> 00:06:56,373
They say the truck's coming
and she's not gonna call them off.
209
00:06:56,398 --> 00:06:57,488
I can't believe it.
210
00:06:57,513 --> 00:06:59,008
I just signed Little King Trashmouth's
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00:06:59,033 --> 00:07:00,199
frigging death warrant.
212
00:07:00,224 --> 00:07:01,594
And I'm like his human godmother.
213
00:07:01,619 --> 00:07:04,203
And I love him. Oh, I'm a bad person.
214
00:07:04,228 --> 00:07:06,152
Mom, there's got to
be something we can do.
215
00:07:06,177 --> 00:07:08,064
Oh, it's too late. They're on their way.
216
00:07:08,089 --> 00:07:10,585
The king is dead. Dead 'cause of me.
217
00:07:10,610 --> 00:07:12,234
No, no, no, Linda, don't be like that.
218
00:07:12,259 --> 00:07:13,671
We can, uh... we can catch
219
00:07:13,696 --> 00:07:15,112
Little King Trashmouth ourselves,
220
00:07:15,198 --> 00:07:16,947
- before animal control gets here.
- Wha... ?
221
00:07:17,033 --> 00:07:19,659
If they can't find him,
they can't take him, right?
222
00:07:19,684 --> 00:07:22,347
- Maybe, yeah?
- Well, then, what are we waiting for?
223
00:07:22,372 --> 00:07:24,827
Maybe some training on
handling injured raccoons?
224
00:07:24,852 --> 00:07:26,643
So we don't get clawed or, or bitten?
225
00:07:26,668 --> 00:07:29,120
A lot? No? Yeah, it's probably fine.
226
00:07:29,145 --> 00:07:31,314
Hey, Bob, I'm gonna get a
raccoon box from the basement.
227
00:07:31,339 --> 00:07:33,543
All right, I'll just take
care of everything in here.
228
00:07:33,568 --> 00:07:34,692
Ooh, can I order some fries?
229
00:07:34,717 --> 00:07:36,195
Ah, never mind, i-I'll just smell 'em.
230
00:07:36,219 --> 00:07:38,135
Mmm.
231
00:07:38,671 --> 00:07:40,156
Hi, welcome. Here's a menu.
232
00:07:40,181 --> 00:07:42,093
I'll have, uh, the
burger of the day, please.
233
00:07:42,118 --> 00:07:43,159
Uh, okay, great.
234
00:07:43,843 --> 00:07:45,888
Sorry, uh, are you
with one of the bands?
235
00:07:45,913 --> 00:07:47,807
Yeah. The Soul Breezers.
How did you know?
236
00:07:47,832 --> 00:07:49,582
'Cause you look like a music guy.
237
00:07:49,607 --> 00:07:51,918
- You have a hat.
- Well, thank you for noticing.
238
00:07:51,943 --> 00:07:53,669
I'm their road manager. I'm Ian.
239
00:07:53,694 --> 00:07:56,208
Oh, hi, I'm Bob. The
Soul Breezers are great.
240
00:07:56,233 --> 00:07:58,859
I love their song. I
mean, their multiple songs.
241
00:07:58,884 --> 00:07:59,884
- That I know.
- Mm.
242
00:07:59,909 --> 00:08:01,362
Also, it's kind of amazing.
243
00:08:01,387 --> 00:08:02,720
After all these years,
244
00:08:02,745 --> 00:08:04,390
they're still out there
doing what they love.
245
00:08:04,414 --> 00:08:05,909
- It's inspiring.
- Ha.
246
00:08:05,934 --> 00:08:07,058
Why "ha"?
247
00:08:07,083 --> 00:08:08,304
Ah-ha-ha.
248
00:08:08,329 --> 00:08:10,705
- Why two ha's?
- I wouldn't say they love it.
249
00:08:10,730 --> 00:08:12,730
- You wouldn't? Why?
- Because they're miserable.
250
00:08:12,755 --> 00:08:14,042
- Oh.
- And broke.
251
00:08:14,067 --> 00:08:15,334
- As am I.
- Oh.
252
00:08:15,359 --> 00:08:16,639
I wrote all about it in my memoir
253
00:08:16,664 --> 00:08:18,580
Soul Tales from Beyond the Breeze.
254
00:08:18,666 --> 00:08:19,974
Still looking for a publisher
255
00:08:19,999 --> 00:08:21,871
and maybe a computer so
I can actually write it.
256
00:08:21,896 --> 00:08:23,687
If you have a spare
computer, let me know.
257
00:08:23,712 --> 00:08:26,326
- I-I don't think I do.
- Huh, pity.
258
00:08:26,351 --> 00:08:27,639
Are these napkins free to take?
259
00:08:27,664 --> 00:08:29,497
- Lot of spills on the bus.
- Uh... sure.
260
00:08:29,522 --> 00:08:31,355
And of course toilet paper isn't cheap.
261
00:08:31,380 --> 00:08:32,769
Ooh, this is good stuff.
262
00:08:32,794 --> 00:08:34,919
Okay, Tina, you stand on that side,
263
00:08:34,944 --> 00:08:36,151
and I'll stand on this side.
264
00:08:36,237 --> 00:08:37,317
If he tries to go that way,
265
00:08:37,363 --> 00:08:38,904
make noise and send him back to me.
266
00:08:38,990 --> 00:08:40,652
- Okay.
- Then I'll get him with the blanket.
267
00:08:40,677 --> 00:08:42,677
I couldn't find a box, but
a blanket's fine, right?
268
00:08:42,702 --> 00:08:44,322
Um, I'm a little concerned?
269
00:08:44,347 --> 00:08:45,680
And, Teddy, on the count of three,
270
00:08:45,705 --> 00:08:46,954
you pull back the dumpster.
271
00:08:46,979 --> 00:08:48,766
Yup, yup. I'm not
totally sure I can move
272
00:08:48,791 --> 00:08:50,431
a heavy steel dumpster
with just my hands,
273
00:08:50,458 --> 00:08:52,640
- but maybe I'll get super strength, right?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
274
00:08:52,665 --> 00:08:54,795
You just need to get
it out like ten inches.
275
00:08:54,922 --> 00:08:56,380
You're doing the lord's work there.
276
00:08:56,465 --> 00:08:58,253
- Thanks, Mr. Huggins.
- But just to say it,
277
00:08:58,278 --> 00:08:59,360
he's gonna bite you.
278
00:08:59,385 --> 00:09:00,445
Is that what you're going for?
279
00:09:00,469 --> 00:09:01,593
- Uh...
- It's gonna be fine.
280
00:09:01,637 --> 00:09:02,637
It's gonna be fine.
281
00:09:02,662 --> 00:09:04,161
Ooh, I can see his foot better.
282
00:09:04,186 --> 00:09:06,701
It has a splinter in it.
He's almost got it out.
283
00:09:06,726 --> 00:09:08,512
I guess that licking was smart.
284
00:09:08,537 --> 00:09:10,287
Sorry, King. Ooh, he got it out.
285
00:09:10,312 --> 00:09:12,387
All right, here we go. One...
286
00:09:12,398 --> 00:09:14,064
- Uh...
- Two... Tina, no. Nuh-uh.
287
00:09:14,089 --> 00:09:15,584
- Sorry. - Three.
- Oh.
288
00:09:15,609 --> 00:09:17,884
It's not that hard. Good
wheels on this thing.
289
00:09:17,909 --> 00:09:20,103
Here, King. I'm not gonna hurt you.
290
00:09:20,128 --> 00:09:21,947
I mean, you're already
hurt. You know what I mean.
291
00:09:22,093 --> 00:09:23,217
Yah.
292
00:09:23,242 --> 00:09:24,469
- He's getting away.
- Uh-oh.
293
00:09:24,493 --> 00:09:26,322
No! I missed him. Ah.
294
00:09:26,347 --> 00:09:28,139
Animal control will be here any minute.
295
00:09:28,164 --> 00:09:29,288
But the splinter.
296
00:09:29,415 --> 00:09:30,726
We-we can tell them
it was just a splinter.
297
00:09:30,750 --> 00:09:32,791
But he got it out. So, no evidence.
298
00:09:32,816 --> 00:09:34,687
Now he's just a limpy, cranky raccoon.
299
00:09:34,814 --> 00:09:37,291
- Oh, no.
- But he's running away,
300
00:09:37,316 --> 00:09:39,650
so animal control still probably
won't be able to find him.
301
00:09:39,675 --> 00:09:41,642
- She's right.
- They won't know where he went.
302
00:09:41,667 --> 00:09:42,903
They can torture us all they want.
303
00:09:42,928 --> 00:09:44,924
- We're not gonna talk.
- I guess.
304
00:09:44,949 --> 00:09:46,407
Unless they do fingernails or eyes.
305
00:09:46,432 --> 00:09:48,094
I-I can't handle anything in my eyes.
306
00:09:48,119 --> 00:09:51,162
- Or sleep deprivation. I need my eight.
- I won't talk.
307
00:09:51,187 --> 00:09:53,247
Unless they try to bribe
me with some macaroons.
308
00:09:53,272 --> 00:09:55,314
Oh, I love macaroons.
309
00:09:55,434 --> 00:09:56,834
If they have macaroons...
310
00:09:56,859 --> 00:09:58,409
Y'all gonna have to forgive me.
311
00:09:59,070 --> 00:10:00,881
I feel like we
should get our candy back...
312
00:10:00,905 --> 00:10:01,965
Not sure what's going on in there.
313
00:10:01,989 --> 00:10:03,693
They're not doing any face-smushing.
314
00:10:03,718 --> 00:10:05,051
Yeah, what's wrong with them?
315
00:10:05,076 --> 00:10:06,825
Uh, what's happening?
Where are you going?
316
00:10:06,869 --> 00:10:08,743
The show's just getting started.
317
00:10:08,768 --> 00:10:10,347
Sorry, Louise. We were talking, and...
318
00:10:10,379 --> 00:10:12,818
Maybe it'd be easier to watch
the concert from the street?
319
00:10:12,843 --> 00:10:15,038
Where we could have a
clear view of the stage?
320
00:10:15,063 --> 00:10:17,063
From the street? Yeah, I've got news.
321
00:10:17,292 --> 00:10:19,250
When you're our size
there's no such thing
322
00:10:19,275 --> 00:10:21,108
as a "clear view of the stage."
323
00:10:21,133 --> 00:10:23,838
You'll be out there watching
the tall person butt show.
324
00:10:23,863 --> 00:10:25,821
And, my friends, you
won't want an encore.
325
00:10:25,846 --> 00:10:27,551
I can get on Ollie's shoulders.
326
00:10:27,576 --> 00:10:29,325
And I can get on Andy's shoulders.
327
00:10:29,350 --> 00:10:31,433
Maybe I'll hop on their shoulders?
328
00:10:31,458 --> 00:10:32,953
So, this is awkward.
329
00:10:32,978 --> 00:10:35,474
- Can we have our candy back?
- You cannot have it back.
330
00:10:35,499 --> 00:10:38,060
I mean, yes, you can,
if that's what you want,
331
00:10:38,085 --> 00:10:40,711
but instead how about an upgrade?
332
00:10:40,736 --> 00:10:43,191
- Huh? - An upgrade?
- What kind of upgrade?
333
00:10:43,216 --> 00:10:47,510
Uh, how do you like the sound
of an all-access backstage pass?
334
00:10:47,535 --> 00:10:49,363
Sort of. Look.
335
00:10:49,388 --> 00:10:50,846
The real show's happening back there.
336
00:10:50,871 --> 00:10:53,432
We're talking human drama. Crazy stuff.
337
00:10:53,457 --> 00:10:54,986
- Drugs, maybe.
- Wow.
338
00:10:55,011 --> 00:10:56,914
That guy at the snack
table sure seems to like
339
00:10:56,939 --> 00:10:58,813
what I think is black licorice?
340
00:10:58,838 --> 00:11:00,523
As addictive as any narcotic.
341
00:11:00,712 --> 00:11:02,586
Huh, that lady's blowing
her nose really hard.
342
00:11:02,611 --> 00:11:03,651
Let me see.
343
00:11:03,676 --> 00:11:05,713
She really knows her
way around a tissue.
344
00:11:05,738 --> 00:11:08,030
Yup, insiders-only stuff right there.
345
00:11:08,055 --> 00:11:10,055
So, what do you say
we bring over the seats
346
00:11:10,141 --> 00:11:12,803
- and, uh, keep the show rolling?
- I don't know.
347
00:11:12,828 --> 00:11:14,286
- We'll throw in snacks.
- Eh...
348
00:11:14,311 --> 00:11:16,474
And other perks to be named later.
349
00:11:16,499 --> 00:11:18,185
- Free Pelotons.
- Not free Pelotons.
350
00:11:18,210 --> 00:11:20,376
How about we get to
sleep in your bathtub?
351
00:11:20,401 --> 00:11:21,483
Oh, my god. Yes.
352
00:11:21,508 --> 00:11:22,980
Uh... okay?
353
00:11:23,005 --> 00:11:24,880
- Yay!
- As a guy with allergies,
354
00:11:24,905 --> 00:11:27,030
I'm invested in this nose-blowing lady.
355
00:11:27,055 --> 00:11:28,221
Ha. Very good.
356
00:11:28,246 --> 00:11:29,844
Gene, get the chairs. And you know what?
357
00:11:29,869 --> 00:11:31,555
Throw in a few of our
cushiest seat cushions.
358
00:11:31,664 --> 00:11:33,997
- You mean mom and dad's pillows?
- Exactly.
359
00:11:34,976 --> 00:11:37,268
Uh, Linda, are-are you coming out here?
360
00:11:37,293 --> 00:11:38,645
Do you want me to go in there and cook?
361
00:11:38,669 --> 00:11:40,539
- No, no, I'm cooking.
- I mean, I think you're just
362
00:11:40,564 --> 00:11:42,439
pushing onions around
on the cutting board?
363
00:11:42,464 --> 00:11:44,126
Yeah, yeah, that's part of the process.
364
00:11:44,151 --> 00:11:45,276
Oh, god, they're here.
365
00:11:45,301 --> 00:11:46,570
- Oh, no.
- I'll go talk to them.
366
00:11:46,613 --> 00:11:48,701
Okay. Thanks for doing
that to the onion.
367
00:11:48,726 --> 00:11:51,258
Afternoon. Are you the one
who called about a raccoon?
368
00:11:51,283 --> 00:11:52,366
No. Goodbye.
369
00:11:52,391 --> 00:11:53,702
Good luck with the controlling animals.
370
00:11:53,726 --> 00:11:55,680
- Uh... - Mom?
- Linda. Calm.
371
00:11:55,705 --> 00:11:57,413
Sorry, I mean, that was us.
372
00:11:57,438 --> 00:12:00,352
Yeah. But it was, uh...
Ha. It's a funny story.
373
00:12:00,377 --> 00:12:02,645
- How so?
- I saw a dog.
374
00:12:02,670 --> 00:12:04,753
And I thought it was a raccoon.
375
00:12:04,778 --> 00:12:07,044
- Ha! Silly Linda.
- A dog?
376
00:12:07,069 --> 00:12:08,928
Yup, just a dog. Total dog.
377
00:12:08,953 --> 00:12:11,912
He had a bone and a
collar. A waggly tail.
378
00:12:11,937 --> 00:12:13,289
- He was barking.
- He was.
379
00:12:13,314 --> 00:12:14,855
- And licking himself.
- Very true.
380
00:12:14,880 --> 00:12:17,399
So there is no raccoon
out in the daytime
381
00:12:17,424 --> 00:12:18,504
- appearing injured?
- Nope.
382
00:12:18,529 --> 00:12:19,736
- Uh-uh. -
No, officer.
383
00:12:19,761 --> 00:12:21,486
Okay, then what is that?
384
00:12:21,511 --> 00:12:22,844
- Oh, no.
- Ah!
385
00:12:22,888 --> 00:12:24,384
Hmm. He's limping.
386
00:12:24,409 --> 00:12:26,867
- Could be distemper.
- No. He has great temper.
387
00:12:26,892 --> 00:12:28,349
It was a splinter in his foot.
388
00:12:28,374 --> 00:12:29,415
But it fell out.
389
00:12:29,440 --> 00:12:31,121
I'm not just saying that to protect him.
390
00:12:31,146 --> 00:12:32,261
You got to believe me.
391
00:12:32,286 --> 00:12:33,806
I'm a normal, believable person, right?
392
00:12:33,831 --> 00:12:35,000
I need to check it out.
393
00:12:35,025 --> 00:12:36,728
No, no, no. No pole. No pole.
394
00:12:36,753 --> 00:12:38,670
Uh... it keeps me safe from the animal?
395
00:12:38,695 --> 00:12:40,111
Also, it's my lucky pole.
396
00:12:40,136 --> 00:12:41,635
I get 'em every time with this thing.
397
00:12:41,660 --> 00:12:42,826
No, no, no, no, no, no.
398
00:12:42,851 --> 00:12:44,134
Oh. He's gone.
399
00:12:44,159 --> 00:12:45,677
Oh, well. Thanks for coming by.
400
00:12:45,702 --> 00:12:47,180
- Can't catch 'em all.
- Oh, no. I catch 'em all.
401
00:12:47,204 --> 00:12:48,724
Everyone at work hates me 'cause of it.
402
00:12:48,872 --> 00:12:50,349
That, and I correct everyone's grammar.
403
00:12:50,670 --> 00:12:52,612
Wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait. Don't go, don't go.
404
00:12:56,072 --> 00:12:58,690
Oh, my god. We can't let her
find Little King Trashmouth.
405
00:12:58,715 --> 00:12:59,649
Did anyone see where he went?
406
00:12:59,674 --> 00:13:01,065
- No. Sorry.
- Me neither.
407
00:13:01,090 --> 00:13:03,510
I was distracted by how
that pole looks like...
408
00:13:03,535 --> 00:13:05,363
Not a noose, but a little bit?
409
00:13:05,490 --> 00:13:07,073
Oh... What do we do now?
410
00:13:07,098 --> 00:13:08,723
Maybe Mr. Huggins saw where he went.
411
00:13:08,748 --> 00:13:09,868
Shoot. He's gone.
412
00:13:09,893 --> 00:13:11,100
Probably went to that concert.
413
00:13:11,125 --> 00:13:12,579
I hope he's dancing for all of us.
414
00:13:12,747 --> 00:13:14,080
But also he's got that bad hip.
415
00:13:14,105 --> 00:13:15,458
Maybe he's dancing on his left leg.
416
00:13:15,482 --> 00:13:17,626
Maybe we could find
Little King Trashmouth
417
00:13:17,651 --> 00:13:19,275
- before she does?
- I don't know.
418
00:13:19,300 --> 00:13:20,879
- Lot of alleys.
- We could split up.
419
00:13:20,904 --> 00:13:21,904
I could follow her
420
00:13:21,929 --> 00:13:23,220
and I'll shout if she finds him?
421
00:13:23,245 --> 00:13:24,508
Right. Uh, good.
422
00:13:24,533 --> 00:13:26,449
Uh, d-d-don't let her catch him.
423
00:13:26,474 --> 00:13:28,011
But if she does, uh, just shout.
424
00:13:28,036 --> 00:13:29,180
Okay, what do I shout, what do I shout?
425
00:13:29,204 --> 00:13:31,496
Uh, just say, uh, you won the lottery.
426
00:13:31,702 --> 00:13:33,160
- And you're excited.
- Okay.
427
00:13:33,185 --> 00:13:35,185
All right, I could take that alley,
428
00:13:35,210 --> 00:13:37,354
- and you take the other one?
- Yeah. Yeah, okay.
429
00:13:37,379 --> 00:13:39,837
Actually, can we switch alleys?
I just like this one better.
430
00:13:39,862 --> 00:13:41,236
Yeah, sure, yeah.
431
00:13:42,111 --> 00:13:44,569
And there's the endless
travel to shabby little towns.
432
00:13:44,655 --> 00:13:46,488
- No offense.
- None taken.
433
00:13:46,513 --> 00:13:47,720
I mean, some taken.
434
00:13:47,745 --> 00:13:49,261
And we sleep in tiny coffin-like beds
435
00:13:49,286 --> 00:13:52,204
on a bus that seems to
somehow store farts forever.
436
00:13:52,229 --> 00:13:54,704
But there must be some
reason they keep going.
437
00:13:54,729 --> 00:13:56,082
Sure. The fact that there's nothing else
438
00:13:56,106 --> 00:13:57,355
that they could do for money.
439
00:13:57,380 --> 00:14:00,502
Right. But, you know,
people enjoy their music?
440
00:14:00,527 --> 00:14:02,777
That must make it all feel worth it.
441
00:14:02,802 --> 00:14:04,256
Oh, you mean the one song
442
00:14:04,281 --> 00:14:05,591
that they wrote a million years ago?
443
00:14:05,615 --> 00:14:07,282
Yeah, imagine if you did one thing,
444
00:14:07,323 --> 00:14:11,001
one good thing, sure,
but one thing over and
445
00:14:11,025 --> 00:14:14,247
over and over and over
for the rest of your life.
446
00:14:14,272 --> 00:14:15,304
Can you picture what a
447
00:14:15,328 --> 00:14:17,018
- nightmare that would be?
- Um...
448
00:14:17,043 --> 00:14:18,955
That's what happens to a
dream when you cling to it.
449
00:14:18,980 --> 00:14:21,898
You can end up hating it
but doing it anyway because
450
00:14:21,923 --> 00:14:23,544
what the hell else are you gonna do?
451
00:14:23,569 --> 00:14:26,236
- Right.
- Anyhoo, I wasn't gonna order soft serve,
452
00:14:26,261 --> 00:14:28,238
but now I kind of want soft serve.
453
00:14:28,263 --> 00:14:30,759
Do you give out free
samples? I would need 12.
454
00:14:30,784 --> 00:14:32,951
- I'll just give you a cup.
- Thank you.
455
00:14:32,976 --> 00:14:34,704
Best thing that's happened
to me all tour, huh?
456
00:14:34,728 --> 00:14:36,269
It's going in my book.
457
00:14:36,391 --> 00:14:38,391
Ah, the breezers are starting their set.
458
00:14:38,416 --> 00:14:40,875
- Do you need to go back outside?
- Not really.
459
00:14:40,900 --> 00:14:42,650
It's a well-oiled
machine at this point.
460
00:14:42,880 --> 00:14:45,922
A well-oiled, sad,
soul-crushing machine.
461
00:14:46,990 --> 00:14:48,134
Enjoying the show, folks?
462
00:14:48,158 --> 00:14:49,532
That guy down there has been
463
00:14:49,557 --> 00:14:51,595
coiling a cable for like half an hour.
464
00:14:51,722 --> 00:14:53,471
I know, right? It's mesmerizing.
465
00:14:53,496 --> 00:14:55,663
How long is that
cable? When will it end?
466
00:14:55,892 --> 00:14:57,642
- It ended. - Aw.
- I miss it.
467
00:14:57,726 --> 00:14:59,226
And how about that music, huh?
468
00:14:59,251 --> 00:15:01,271
Isn't it more fun to imagine
what the band is doing?
469
00:15:01,296 --> 00:15:03,607
T-shirts. Get your t-shirts.
470
00:15:03,632 --> 00:15:06,674
This one's 30% cotton, but 100% rocking.
471
00:15:06,820 --> 00:15:07,902
Is that magic marker?
472
00:15:07,927 --> 00:15:09,487
- What makes you say that?
- My eyes.
473
00:15:09,512 --> 00:15:12,639
Look, you could pay 25
bucks for a shirt down there
474
00:15:12,682 --> 00:15:14,201
or three bucks' worth of candy up here.
475
00:15:14,225 --> 00:15:16,180
Also, good luck finding youth sizes.
476
00:15:16,205 --> 00:15:18,288
Or fun magic marker fragrances.
477
00:15:18,313 --> 00:15:20,239
I guess I'll take a shirt. Youth medium.
478
00:15:20,264 --> 00:15:22,853
All right. Wear it proudly,
my medium-sized friend.
479
00:15:22,878 --> 00:15:25,647
Anybody else? Ooh, this
one comes with free...
480
00:15:25,672 --> 00:15:27,672
What I think might be cheese crumbs.
481
00:15:27,697 --> 00:15:28,988
Fancy.
482
00:15:29,235 --> 00:15:30,902
Where is he? Where is he?
483
00:15:30,927 --> 00:15:32,510
King, it's Linda.
484
00:15:32,535 --> 00:15:34,782
Your friend, your best human friend.
485
00:15:34,807 --> 00:15:37,349
Mr. Mouth. Mr. Trashmouth. Or King.
486
00:15:37,374 --> 00:15:38,994
I don't know what you like to be called.
487
00:15:39,019 --> 00:15:41,353
Please don't be in this
alley, Mr. Little King.
488
00:15:41,378 --> 00:15:43,957
I hope you went to the beach,
or you hopped on a freight train
489
00:15:43,982 --> 00:15:46,149
and you're learning to play
the harmonica right now.
490
00:15:46,174 --> 00:15:48,671
Aha.
491
00:15:48,696 --> 00:15:50,654
Okay. I'm coming towards you.
492
00:15:50,679 --> 00:15:51,759
I'm just walking over there
493
00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:54,410
to show you this funny
video on my phone.
494
00:15:54,617 --> 00:15:55,825
Oh, no. I won the lottery.
495
00:15:55,850 --> 00:15:57,350
I won the lottery. I can't believe it.
496
00:15:57,477 --> 00:16:00,269
Does anyone want to share
it? Uh, come on over here.
497
00:16:00,415 --> 00:16:01,456
- To me.
- Oh, boy.
498
00:16:01,481 --> 00:16:02,563
Oh, my god, good for Tina.
499
00:16:02,588 --> 00:16:04,125
No, wait. That's the distraction.
500
00:16:04,150 --> 00:16:05,419
Right, right, right,
right, right. That's bad.
501
00:16:05,443 --> 00:16:08,277
Whoops. Sorry. Oh, god. Sorry. Sorry.
502
00:16:11,343 --> 00:16:13,381
Oh, no. King.
503
00:16:13,406 --> 00:16:14,948
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
504
00:16:14,973 --> 00:16:17,455
Ooh, on the good leg. On the good leg.
505
00:16:23,772 --> 00:16:26,040
I'm sorry, King. I did this.
506
00:16:26,065 --> 00:16:28,483
I'm the reason you're
gonna die. I'm the worst.
507
00:16:28,508 --> 00:16:31,672
I wish it was me and not you.
Okay, not that far, but...
508
00:16:31,697 --> 00:16:34,743
I don't know how I'm gonna
live with myself after this.
509
00:16:34,870 --> 00:16:36,866
Maybe we use some of my lottery money
510
00:16:36,891 --> 00:16:38,307
to buy a helicopter and fly in?
511
00:16:38,332 --> 00:16:41,389
I'm so confused right now.
Is that lottery stuff real?
512
00:16:41,414 --> 00:16:42,414
I don't know!
513
00:16:42,439 --> 00:16:43,832
Maybe just let me do my job,
514
00:16:43,857 --> 00:16:45,617
protecting the public
from diseased wildlife?
515
00:16:45,650 --> 00:16:46,899
I failed you.
516
00:16:46,985 --> 00:16:49,193
And I'm never gonna
forgive myself, never, ever.
517
00:16:49,218 --> 00:16:51,843
Got to get my head in the game.
518
00:16:51,868 --> 00:16:53,299
Think, Linda, think.
519
00:16:56,034 --> 00:16:57,303
Hi, Barry, just passing through.
520
00:16:57,328 --> 00:16:58,907
Oh... wine lady?
521
00:16:58,932 --> 00:17:01,015
Uh, yeah, it's Linda. You
can call me that, though.
522
00:17:01,040 --> 00:17:02,081
You want anything? Merlot?
523
00:17:02,106 --> 00:17:03,852
Ooh, Merlot. Uh, later, later.
524
00:17:03,877 --> 00:17:06,105
Can I borrow one of these? Can
I open this door real quick?
525
00:17:06,129 --> 00:17:09,255
I'm not gonna hurt you.
526
00:17:09,585 --> 00:17:10,960
As far as you know.
527
00:17:11,695 --> 00:17:13,111
What the... ?
528
00:17:13,136 --> 00:17:14,714
Thanks, Barry. Just got
to take this box home.
529
00:17:14,739 --> 00:17:16,531
There's no wine in it, just a raccoon.
530
00:17:16,556 --> 00:17:17,388
Okay?
531
00:17:17,413 --> 00:17:18,616
Raccoon box coming through.
532
00:17:18,641 --> 00:17:20,808
Ooh, good song. I like it. Funky.
533
00:17:21,228 --> 00:17:24,581
Imagine if you did
one thing over and over
534
00:17:24,606 --> 00:17:26,439
and over for the rest of your life.
535
00:17:26,464 --> 00:17:29,627
Can you picture what a
nightmare that would be?
536
00:17:29,652 --> 00:17:32,820
Be? Be? Be?
537
00:17:33,024 --> 00:17:34,610
- Bob.
- Yeah?
538
00:17:34,635 --> 00:17:36,508
- They're playing "Gas In My Car."
- Oh.
539
00:17:36,533 --> 00:17:38,025
Thought you might
want to watch this one.
540
00:17:38,050 --> 00:17:39,770
From where I'm sitting
you can see the band.
541
00:17:39,795 --> 00:17:41,845
- Sort of. Sometimes.
- Oh, yeah.
542
00:17:41,870 --> 00:17:44,621
I can kind of make
out one of their arms.
543
00:17:44,646 --> 00:17:45,978
Wrinkly biceps.
544
00:17:46,003 --> 00:17:47,477
Hey, I know this one.
545
00:17:47,502 --> 00:17:48,645
My dad has it on his playlist
546
00:17:48,670 --> 00:17:49,689
of songs he wants me to like.
547
00:17:49,713 --> 00:17:51,046
- Do you like it?
- Oh, sure.
548
00:17:51,071 --> 00:17:52,988
My dad has great taste.
He told me so, himself.
549
00:17:53,013 --> 00:17:55,305
Maybe it's just the magic
marker smell making me dizzy,
550
00:17:55,330 --> 00:17:56,236
but I'm into this.
551
00:17:56,261 --> 00:17:58,469
This song makes me want
to shake my potty parts.
552
00:17:58,660 --> 00:17:59,845
They're all potty parts, honey.
553
00:18:00,096 --> 00:18:03,222
- Yeah.
- Hey, dancing's extra.
554
00:18:03,247 --> 00:18:04,775
Just kidding, go nuts.
555
00:18:06,691 --> 00:18:09,978
- What a day, huh, officer?
- Darn raccoons, am I right?
556
00:18:10,003 --> 00:18:12,170
Or dogs. Who even knows which is which?
557
00:18:12,337 --> 00:18:13,461
Mm-hmm.
558
00:18:13,486 --> 00:18:14,922
Yeah, well. I'm moving
on to another call.
559
00:18:14,947 --> 00:18:15,947
See you later.
560
00:18:15,972 --> 00:18:17,597
I mean, we won't see you later probably,
561
00:18:17,622 --> 00:18:19,831
but it's a thing that people
say to each other, I think.
562
00:18:19,856 --> 00:18:21,397
Yup. Goodbye.
563
00:18:22,611 --> 00:18:23,985
She's gone. She's gone, right?
564
00:18:24,010 --> 00:18:25,571
- Is she gone?
- Mom. Oh, my god, you did it.
565
00:18:25,596 --> 00:18:26,679
Whoa.
566
00:18:26,704 --> 00:18:28,337
Linda, you saved the king.
567
00:18:28,362 --> 00:18:29,486
You're gonna get knighted.
568
00:18:29,511 --> 00:18:31,219
I mean, you almost got him killed.
569
00:18:31,244 --> 00:18:32,853
But then you redeemed
yourself. How's he doing?
570
00:18:32,878 --> 00:18:34,837
Okay, I think. Want to say hi?
571
00:18:34,862 --> 00:18:35,944
Hi.
572
00:18:35,969 --> 00:18:37,927
Stepping away from
you. Nothing personal.
573
00:18:37,952 --> 00:18:40,495
He's just a little rambunctious.
574
00:18:40,520 --> 00:18:41,853
Wait, is that... ?
575
00:18:42,039 --> 00:18:45,272
- Gary.
- Whoa. Uh-oh. He's getting out.
576
00:18:46,121 --> 00:18:48,455
♪ In my car ♪
577
00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:50,647
♪ I'm gonna get to you... ♪
578
00:18:50,672 --> 00:18:53,173
King's limping less. Huh.
579
00:18:53,198 --> 00:18:54,670
His paw can't be bothering him too much
580
00:18:54,695 --> 00:18:56,027
if he's able to do that.
581
00:18:56,052 --> 00:18:58,052
Should we, uh, give 'em their privacy?
582
00:18:58,077 --> 00:18:59,681
- Whoo!
- Nice whoo, Tina.
583
00:18:59,706 --> 00:19:00,706
Yeah.
584
00:19:01,342 --> 00:19:04,009
Huh. They kinda look
like they're having fun.
585
00:19:04,034 --> 00:19:05,392
Well, of course they're having fun.
586
00:19:05,417 --> 00:19:07,208
Really? You said they were miserable.
587
00:19:07,233 --> 00:19:08,440
- Well, they are.
- Then...
588
00:19:08,753 --> 00:19:11,003
- I-I don't get it.
- Well, there are moments.
589
00:19:11,028 --> 00:19:12,688
You know, when the band locks in,
590
00:19:12,713 --> 00:19:14,045
the crowd is with them,
591
00:19:14,070 --> 00:19:15,464
everything they ever
loved about playing music
592
00:19:15,489 --> 00:19:16,728
comes flooding back
593
00:19:16,753 --> 00:19:18,796
in a rush of pure heavenly
emotion, all that crap.
594
00:19:18,821 --> 00:19:21,673
But all these decades
later, they still have them?
595
00:19:21,698 --> 00:19:23,698
- The-the moments?
- You tell me.
596
00:19:24,118 --> 00:19:26,493
♪ In my car ♪
597
00:19:26,518 --> 00:19:28,555
- ♪ let's roll ♪
- ♪ I'm gonna ♪
598
00:19:28,580 --> 00:19:30,747
♪ get to you no
matter where you are ♪
599
00:19:30,772 --> 00:19:34,689
♪ gas in my car... ♪
600
00:19:34,714 --> 00:19:38,400
Yeah, I-I see it. Okay,
I can deal with that.
601
00:19:38,425 --> 00:19:40,801
- What'd you say?
- Uh, uh, nothing.
602
00:19:42,427 --> 00:19:43,760
Are you okay? Is this... ?
603
00:19:43,785 --> 00:19:45,285
Are you having some kind of breakdown?
604
00:19:45,310 --> 00:19:47,811
Oh, uh, no, this is, uh, me dancing?
605
00:19:47,836 --> 00:19:49,808
Oh, yeah. I can sort of see that now.
606
00:19:49,833 --> 00:19:51,650
Hey, dad. What's your body doing?
607
00:19:51,675 --> 00:19:52,900
- Dancing.
- Mm.
608
00:19:52,925 --> 00:19:54,277
We're just grabbing some concessions.
609
00:19:54,302 --> 00:19:56,010
- For the after-party.
- The after-party?
610
00:19:56,035 --> 00:19:57,197
We're doing it for free.
611
00:19:57,222 --> 00:19:58,509
The vibe's really great up there.
612
00:19:58,534 --> 00:20:00,244
- You don't mind, right?
- It's a write-off.
613
00:20:00,269 --> 00:20:02,227
- Mm.
- Whew. Sorry, we're back.
614
00:20:02,252 --> 00:20:03,780
- We're back.
- We remembered we have jobs
615
00:20:03,805 --> 00:20:04,853
and we came back to do them.
616
00:20:04,878 --> 00:20:06,681
Also, I saved Little King Trashmouth.
617
00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:08,581
- No big deal.
- Hi, Bob. I'm starving.
618
00:20:08,606 --> 00:20:10,314
Uh, can I get a burger and fries?
619
00:20:10,339 --> 00:20:13,424
Oh, and maybe some fries for
the lovebirds in the alley.
620
00:20:13,449 --> 00:20:15,407
Uh, but give them a few minutes.
621
00:20:21,073 --> 00:20:22,906
♪ I sure am missing you ♪
622
00:20:22,931 --> 00:20:24,847
♪ I wanna see you soon ♪
623
00:20:24,872 --> 00:20:26,413
♪ If I can't get there ♪
624
00:20:26,805 --> 00:20:28,722
♪ what am I gonna, I gonna do now? ♪
625
00:20:28,747 --> 00:20:30,683
- ♪ You should be mine tonight ♪
- ♪ mine tonight ♪
626
00:20:30,707 --> 00:20:32,644
♪ we should be sleeping tight ♪
627
00:20:32,668 --> 00:20:34,167
♪ I'm gonna get there ♪
628
00:20:34,192 --> 00:20:35,646
♪ because you know ♪
629
00:20:35,671 --> 00:20:37,253
- ♪ if there's gas ♪
- ♪ gas ♪
630
00:20:37,297 --> 00:20:38,880
- ♪ in ♪
- ♪ in ♪
631
00:20:39,007 --> 00:20:40,131
- ♪ my ♪
- ♪ my ♪
632
00:20:40,217 --> 00:20:41,217
- ♪ car ♪
- ♪ car ♪
633
00:20:41,301 --> 00:20:42,342
♪ I'm gonna get to you ♪
634
00:20:42,469 --> 00:20:44,010
♪ no matter where you are ♪
635
00:20:44,137 --> 00:20:45,261
- ♪ gas ♪
- ♪ gas ♪
636
00:20:45,389 --> 00:20:46,971
- ♪ in ♪
- ♪ in ♪
637
00:20:47,057 --> 00:20:48,181
- ♪ my ♪
- ♪ my ♪
638
00:20:48,266 --> 00:20:49,349
- ♪ car ♪
- ♪ car ♪
639
00:20:49,476 --> 00:20:51,101
♪ I'm gonna roll to you, baby. ♪
640
00:20:51,126 --> 00:20:53,752
W-wait. Oh, no. No, no.
Did I just run out of ga...
641
00:20:54,228 --> 00:20:57,632
- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -
-- for www.addic7ed.com --