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- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -
-- for www.addic7ed.com --
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Okay, my little snow globes,
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I found some mittens for
our snow tubing trip today.
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Not all the mittens have matches,
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but you can mix them up like
Punky Brewster did with her shoes.
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Boy, she knew how to have fun.
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My snow pants are kind of tight.
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Guess I grew a little since last winter.
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That's what happens when we
water you and give you lots of sunlight.
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This coat seems pretty aerodynamic.
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Probably not gonna get
a lot of wind resistance.
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- Good for snoobing.
- What's snoobing?
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Oh, like snow tubing?
Snoobing? I get it.
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- Yeah, you do.
- These feel okay, I guess.
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Can you tell they're giving me a wedgie?
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No... ?
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That's probably Teddy. I'll let him in.
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Why is Teddy coming upstairs?
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Is the restaurant
gonna be up here today?
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No, he's coming to work on
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a bunch of little things
around the apartment.
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You know, like the wobbly
flusher on the toilet.
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We're finally gonna fix it.
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But our wobbly flusher makes
a funky sound when I jiggle it.
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Now what am I gonna jiggle?
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- Hey, Teddy.
- Hey, Linda.
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Oh, you kids are bundled
up. Going outside to play?
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I guess the snow's
not that old and dirty.
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- That's what we say about Dad.
- Gene.
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We're going snow tubing today.
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- Snoobing.
- Snoobing. Right.
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Oh, that sounds fun.
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You guys going to Avalanche Mountain?
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Avalanche Mountain closed.
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Oh, no. Why'd it close? Avalanche?
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No. Back taxes, I think.
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We're gonna try this
new place out in Redburn.
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- Wait. You guys are going to Redburn today?
- Yeah, why?
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My mom's buried in the
cemetery in Redburn.
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She is? I didn't know that.
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Yeah. Uh, we didn't live
there, but it's a nice cemetery.
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I remember my dad was sort of proud
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that he got her a plot there.
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Is that like getting into a good school?
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Should I start doing more
extracurriculars now, or... ?
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- Uh, no, Tina.
- Oh, good.
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Wait, you guys have never
visited my mom's grave.
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I mean, I haven't been there myself
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in a really, really long time.
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But if you guys are going to Redburn,
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maybe I'll come with you,
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and then maybe we can
all visit my mom's grave,
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and we can go snoobing
together afterwards?
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What are we gonna do
about the restaurant?
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We could close for now and
be back for the dinner rush.
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You're closing the restaurant for lunch.
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I didn't plan on that,
but it's totally fine.
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I can change my plans.
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No big deal. Mr. Flexible over here.
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- Easy, Teddy.
- Sorry. Sorry.
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Okay. We're going to
see your mom's grave,
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and then-then we're gonna go snoobing.
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Uh, okay.
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You're saying "okay" in a
way that's not weird at all.
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Yeah. It's just, uh, you
know, my thing with cemeteries.
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Uh, they kind of give
me the heebie-jeebies.
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Heebie Jeebies is the name of
Ken's Oingo Boingo cover band.
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Oh, right, I forgot
about your cemetery thing.
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If you want, you can
stay at the restaurant
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- and I'll take the kids today.
- Oh, that's an interesting idea.
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Keep the restaurant open. Linda?
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Uh, no, no, I'll go
and support my husband
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and all that good wife crap.
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- I mean, I love you.
- Hmm.
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Supportive. Yay.
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So, it's taking us a
little longer to get there
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than I thought it would.
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We hit some traffic.
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- And there were some pee stops.
- Mm-hmm.
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And it also took a while
to leave the apartment.
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Making cards for my mom, for Grandma,
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seemed like a good idea that I had,
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- but it was time-consuming.
- Some of us nailed it.
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"You put the grand in
grandma, I'm guessing.
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I never met you. Love, Tina."
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Eh, it's no drawing of Grandma
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kickboxing all the clouds in heaven.
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And I wrote, "I hope
you're giving heaven hell."
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I drew her as Uma Thurman
from that dancing scene
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with John Travolta in
Pulp Fiction. She'll love it.
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So, Dad, when was the last time
you visited your mom's grave?
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Oh, I honestly can't remember.
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It was so many years ago.
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- Did you have hair?
- Yes.
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On the part of your head
that I can see right now?
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- Yes.
- What color was it?
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Were you a spicy redhead back then?
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- No.
- Boo.
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Lin, you okay?
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Oh, yeah. I'm just ducking down.
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You know, in case anything
comes out of the cemetery
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to suck my soul.
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I mean, I know that's not how it works.
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- Uh, no, that's how it works.
- Lin, you-you can stay in the car.
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You don't have to get out.
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Me? In the car? By
myself? In the cemetery?
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Are you playing Clue right now?
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Or how about we park on the street?
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And the kids and I can walk inside?
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Ah, no, I want to be there for you.
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Seriously, you-you
don't have to come in.
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- Really?
- Yes. Definitely.
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Okay. Kids, say hi to Grandma for me.
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And if anything tries to suck your soul,
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just spit on your fingertips,
slap the ground three times,
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- and run back to the car.
- Okay.
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Ooh, look at all that
white gold. Sorry, sorry.
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We're visiting Grandma
now, snoobing later.
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I'm in the moment.
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All right, I-I think we go that way?
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Or maybe that way?
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Okay. Good start.
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Oh, that building must be the office.
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Uh, let's go in and
see if they have a map.
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And maybe a hot cocoa to warm up?
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I'd sit by the fire and
have a hot cocoa.
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Guys, there's no cocoa.
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It's an office at a
cemetery, not a lodge.
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Not with that attitude.
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Hi. Bathroom's over there on the left.
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Uh, we don't need the bathroom.
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Oh, sorry, you had that look.
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Our dad just has resting pee face.
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Louise. Um, I-I'm looking
for my mother's grave.
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Do you happen to have a map I could use?
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Oh, yes. We have maps.
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Where did I put them?
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Sorry for your loss. Uh,
when did your mother pass?
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Um, 33 years ago... ?
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I mean, 32. Wait, how old am I?
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64?
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- Lower. I think.
- I'm not in my 60s.
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When was the last time you visited us?
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Um, uh, you know, it's been a while.
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- Last year?
- Not quite last year, no.
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I-I think it's been, um, uh, 20 years?
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Did you move out of state?
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That happens when
people move out of state.
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- No, no, we've been... We've been here.
- O-kay.
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Here's a map. What's your mother's name?
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- Belcher. Lily Belcher.
- Let's see...
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- Ah, she's right over here.
- Okay, great. Thanks.
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Gonna get this baby
ready to give to Grandma.
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Oh, uh, sorry, can't leave cards.
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Or anything except flowers.
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Oh, my mom didn't like getting flowers.
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She was more of a "don't pick 'em,
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just leave 'em" kind of person.
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That's what I say about boogers.
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Well, cards are against
the rules, sorry.
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It's okay. We don't
have to leave our cards.
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I didn't work a long
time on mine or anything.
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I could leave Grandma the granola bar
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I just found in my pocket.
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They're biodegradable.
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I hope she likes them warm and smushed.
167
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Is it rude to pick
your wedgie in a cemetery?
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I think it's rude not to.
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This map is really hard to read.
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It-it looks like a Xerox of a Xerox.
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Oh, Papa, stop making up
words and find Grandma already.
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Okay, well, she's not here,
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because this seems like the
really old part of the cemetery.
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- That I sort of remember?
- It's pretty, in a grave-y way.
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Also in a groovy way.
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That guy died in the '60s. The 1860s.
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Lot of walking, which is cool.
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Should we have rented Segues for this?
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- Cemetery Segues?
- Segue-teries?
180
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Okay, we're looking for a
grave that's flat on the ground.
181
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Uh, I can't read this.
Can-can you read this?
182
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Uh, are those even letters?
183
00:06:34,530 --> 00:06:36,409
I think it says Patrick-cake?
184
00:06:36,434 --> 00:06:39,230
No, it says Ram-snicks-icks.
185
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Uh, let's try this way.
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I wonder how Mom's doing.
Do you think she remembers us?
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♪ Everything is fine,
everything's okay ♪
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00:06:47,170 --> 00:06:48,905
♪ Not gonna look at the cemetery ♪
189
00:06:48,929 --> 00:06:50,123
♪ Oh, my God I peeked ♪
190
00:06:50,148 --> 00:06:51,907
♪ Did the dead people see me? ♪
191
00:06:51,932 --> 00:06:53,701
♪ Are they gonna come get me? ♪
192
00:06:53,726 --> 00:06:56,578
♪ I sure hope not. ♪
193
00:06:56,603 --> 00:06:58,156
Okay, where are we?
194
00:06:58,324 --> 00:07:00,393
Don't worry, kids, we-we're
gonna find Grandma soon.
195
00:07:00,418 --> 00:07:04,086
Oh, what? It's fine, we
haven't been keeping track
196
00:07:04,111 --> 00:07:06,157
of how long this is taking at all.
197
00:07:06,182 --> 00:07:10,184
Wait a second, are we back in
the old part of the cemetery?
198
00:07:10,209 --> 00:07:12,019
Oh, yeah. I remember that angel.
199
00:07:12,044 --> 00:07:14,289
The snow makes it look like
he's wearing a cool hat.
200
00:07:14,314 --> 00:07:16,001
I remember I said, "Cool hat, bro."
201
00:07:16,026 --> 00:07:19,268
Oh, my God. I have no idea
where I'm supposed to go.
202
00:07:19,293 --> 00:07:23,479
I can't find my mom's grave.
I-I can't find my mom's grave.
203
00:07:23,504 --> 00:07:24,872
I am a horrible person.
204
00:07:24,890 --> 00:07:27,056
But a great granola bar opener?
205
00:07:27,081 --> 00:07:28,413
Please? Sir?
206
00:07:28,813 --> 00:07:30,869
Oh, yeah, look at that. Good job, Dad.
207
00:07:34,550 --> 00:07:36,453
I'm so sorry, kids, this-this was
208
00:07:36,477 --> 00:07:37,638
not supposed to take this long.
209
00:07:37,662 --> 00:07:38,973
You should be snoobing right now.
210
00:07:38,997 --> 00:07:41,470
No, no, no, no, no, no.
It's fine, it's fine.
211
00:07:41,495 --> 00:07:44,265
But we can't go without
seeing my mom's grave.
212
00:07:44,290 --> 00:07:46,370
I mean, I don't really
believe in ghosts,
213
00:07:46,395 --> 00:07:49,056
but I feel like all these
people buried here are judging me
214
00:07:49,081 --> 00:07:51,800
and saying I'm a terrible
son and a terrible person.
215
00:07:51,825 --> 00:07:54,845
Maybe they're saying,
"No prob, Bob. Go snoob."
216
00:07:54,870 --> 00:07:56,548
Yeah, if the ghosts are judging you,
217
00:07:56,572 --> 00:07:57,852
it's about so many other things.
218
00:07:57,998 --> 00:08:00,677
- I wish I wore bigger pants.
- We all do.
219
00:08:00,702 --> 00:08:02,142
Uh, I'm gonna call your mom
220
00:08:02,167 --> 00:08:04,138
and tell her we're
gonna be a little longer.
221
00:08:04,163 --> 00:08:07,081
Okay, there's like a 90%
chance my whole family got
222
00:08:07,099 --> 00:08:09,111
pulled into a grave and that's
why they're taking so long.
223
00:08:09,136 --> 00:08:10,895
Ah! Bob?
224
00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:13,990
- Lin... We're... We're, uh...
- -metery... a little bit l... now.
225
00:08:14,014 --> 00:08:17,290
What? I-I can't hear
you. Y-You're breaking up.
226
00:08:17,315 --> 00:08:19,071
I c... hear you...
No, you're c... ing out.
227
00:08:19,095 --> 00:08:21,015
Did you get pulled into a grave or not?
228
00:08:21,039 --> 00:08:24,681
Lin? Oh, disconnected.
Really bad reception here.
229
00:08:24,706 --> 00:08:26,806
I mean, it's not like they
need cell phone service,
230
00:08:26,831 --> 00:08:27,836
but I'd like to think
231
00:08:27,861 --> 00:08:30,134
wherever they are now
has unlimited texting.
232
00:08:30,159 --> 00:08:31,716
Ah, shoot. I lost him.
233
00:08:31,741 --> 00:08:32,884
Hello? Bob?
234
00:08:32,909 --> 00:08:34,104
- Hey, Lin.
- Teddy?
235
00:08:34,129 --> 00:08:35,553
The toilet handle is fixed
236
00:08:35,578 --> 00:08:37,501
and I'm just finishing
patching that hole in the wall.
237
00:08:37,526 --> 00:08:39,079
Well, I won't be able to walk by it
238
00:08:39,099 --> 00:08:40,520
and say "holey moley" anymore,
239
00:08:40,545 --> 00:08:42,427
but it'll be nice to
have a fixed-up wall.
240
00:08:42,452 --> 00:08:43,895
- Thanks, Teddy.
- Sure thing.
241
00:08:43,919 --> 00:08:46,614
Hey, I tried to call Bob and
it went straight to voice mail.
242
00:08:46,639 --> 00:08:49,485
Is he screening my calls?
Just kidding. But is he?
243
00:08:49,525 --> 00:08:52,066
No, he's in the cemetery and
there's bad reception there.
244
00:08:52,091 --> 00:08:54,051
Oh. Why aren't you in the cemetery?
245
00:08:54,096 --> 00:08:55,763
I'm waiting for them in the car.
246
00:08:55,782 --> 00:08:57,611
- I couldn't go in.
- Oh, right.
247
00:08:57,636 --> 00:09:00,987
Your whole totally normal for an
adult fear of cemeteries thing.
248
00:09:01,012 --> 00:09:02,532
Yeah, I-I know.
249
00:09:02,557 --> 00:09:05,152
I feel bad, but why
couldn't Bob's mom be buried
250
00:09:05,177 --> 00:09:07,343
in a nice, well-lit mall or something?
251
00:09:07,368 --> 00:09:09,996
But Lin, if anything
scary's gonna happen,
252
00:09:10,021 --> 00:09:11,521
it'll happen at night. During the day,
253
00:09:11,539 --> 00:09:14,334
it's just a pretty park with
not enough places to sit.
254
00:09:14,427 --> 00:09:17,094
You know what, Teddy? You're right.
255
00:09:17,119 --> 00:09:18,712
It's daytime. I'll be fine.
256
00:09:18,870 --> 00:09:22,083
Okay, I'm gonna do it. I'm
gonna go inside the cemetery
257
00:09:22,108 --> 00:09:24,463
- and I'm gonna be there for Bob.
- Good for you, Lin.
258
00:09:24,669 --> 00:09:26,713
Oof, I-I'm feeling light-headed.
259
00:09:26,738 --> 00:09:27,713
Teddy, are you okay?
260
00:09:27,760 --> 00:09:29,479
Yeah, I think it's low blood sugar.
261
00:09:29,504 --> 00:09:30,520
I skipped lunch.
262
00:09:30,545 --> 00:09:32,127
I couldn't think of any place to eat
263
00:09:32,152 --> 00:09:33,780
and I'm not allowed to pretend to be Bob
264
00:09:33,805 --> 00:09:35,171
and cook in the restaurant anymore,
265
00:09:35,196 --> 00:09:36,695
so here we are.
266
00:09:36,789 --> 00:09:38,917
Listen, help yourself to
anything in the fridge.
267
00:09:38,941 --> 00:09:41,775
Okay. Thanks, Lin, I'm
gonna go do that right now.
268
00:09:41,800 --> 00:09:44,658
Okay, bye. Oh, but don't
eat the leftover meatloaf,
269
00:09:44,683 --> 00:09:45,883
we're saving that for dinner.
270
00:09:45,908 --> 00:09:47,591
Hello? Oh, he hung up.
271
00:09:47,616 --> 00:09:48,949
It's okay, I'll text him.
272
00:09:48,974 --> 00:09:51,658
And I'll text Bob his super
supportive wife is on her way.
273
00:09:51,683 --> 00:09:53,257
And he's lucky to have me.
274
00:09:53,767 --> 00:09:55,357
Eh, what do we got here?
275
00:09:55,382 --> 00:09:57,487
Oh, meatloaf. Maybe I'll try this.
276
00:09:57,512 --> 00:09:58,737
Should I heat it up or...
277
00:09:58,745 --> 00:10:01,137
Oh. Oh, I'm eating it. It's so good.
278
00:10:01,155 --> 00:10:02,552
Oh, and now I'm crying a little bit.
279
00:10:02,577 --> 00:10:03,709
Oh, I was so hungry.
280
00:10:03,733 --> 00:10:06,630
- Oh. Oh...
- _
281
00:10:06,655 --> 00:10:08,741
Damn. The sun looks
like it's gonna set soon.
282
00:10:08,766 --> 00:10:09,690
It's 'snoob big deal.
283
00:10:09,715 --> 00:10:10,881
I mean, it's no big deal.
284
00:10:10,957 --> 00:10:13,142
Yeah, I-I'm sorry again, kids.
285
00:10:13,167 --> 00:10:15,466
Hey, there's still a
little time to snoob,
286
00:10:15,491 --> 00:10:17,572
if we found the grave, like, right now.
287
00:10:17,597 --> 00:10:19,036
What if we shouted "Grandma"?
288
00:10:19,061 --> 00:10:20,319
Maybe she'd give us a sign
289
00:10:20,344 --> 00:10:22,602
and a branch would fall
off a tree or something?
290
00:10:22,769 --> 00:10:24,548
Grandma! Anything?
291
00:10:24,573 --> 00:10:27,712
Uh, okay, let's not shout
"Grandma" in a cemetery.
292
00:10:27,737 --> 00:10:30,259
A lot of people here
probably answer to that name.
293
00:10:30,284 --> 00:10:31,880
Oh, hey, look. Uh, a flat section.
294
00:10:31,905 --> 00:10:35,091
- We weren't here already, were we?
- I don't think so.
295
00:10:35,115 --> 00:10:36,764
I don't see any footprints in the snow.
296
00:10:36,783 --> 00:10:38,489
Or any of the beautiful
butt-prints I made.
297
00:10:38,514 --> 00:10:40,320
Okay, great. Let's try this section.
298
00:10:40,345 --> 00:10:42,968
And make more butt-prints.
And this time I won't hold back.
299
00:10:42,993 --> 00:10:44,201
Mm.
300
00:10:44,225 --> 00:10:46,751
Thanks. Sorry about
all the weird questions.
301
00:10:46,940 --> 00:10:49,087
I know I don't need to hold my
breath the whole time I'm here
302
00:10:49,111 --> 00:10:50,922
so I don't die.
303
00:10:50,946 --> 00:10:52,758
You probably get that a lot, right?
304
00:10:52,782 --> 00:10:55,525
No? Well, uh, thanks for the map.
305
00:10:55,722 --> 00:10:58,505
Okay, here I am.
306
00:10:58,530 --> 00:11:00,046
Walking in the cemetery.
307
00:11:00,192 --> 00:11:02,842
All right, map, where's my family?
308
00:11:02,867 --> 00:11:04,943
Oh, my God, this thing is terrible.
309
00:11:05,279 --> 00:11:07,129
Are you my dad's mom? No.
310
00:11:07,154 --> 00:11:08,973
Are you my dad's mom? No.
311
00:11:08,998 --> 00:11:10,798
Gene, you don't have
to say that every time.
312
00:11:10,886 --> 00:11:14,079
- What if I whisper it?
- Are you my dad's mom? No.
313
00:11:14,104 --> 00:11:16,989
Hey, so you know, I'm locking
the gate in about a half-hour.
314
00:11:17,014 --> 00:11:19,772
Which is exactly how much time
I have left in this podcast.
315
00:11:19,797 --> 00:11:22,717
Oh, God. Okay, well,
thanks for letting us know.
316
00:11:22,742 --> 00:11:24,944
H-Hey, could you help
us out real quick?
317
00:11:24,964 --> 00:11:25,870
Yep. You, too.
318
00:11:25,965 --> 00:11:27,291
Oh, you're driving away.
319
00:11:27,316 --> 00:11:29,203
Good luck with the podcast,
I hear they're great!
320
00:11:29,228 --> 00:11:32,029
Hey, Dad? Didn't you say
Grandma died 33 years ago?
321
00:11:32,054 --> 00:11:34,022
- Yeah.
- All the graves that I'm seeing
322
00:11:34,047 --> 00:11:36,789
are for people who died within,
like, the last ten years.
323
00:11:36,809 --> 00:11:38,344
- Same.
- Yeah, same.
324
00:11:38,368 --> 00:11:39,551
You know what?
325
00:11:39,627 --> 00:11:41,294
Let's just go to the car
326
00:11:41,319 --> 00:11:42,893
and-and come back another time.
327
00:11:42,918 --> 00:11:44,057
Th-This isn't gonna work.
328
00:11:44,088 --> 00:11:46,587
We're not gonna find the
grave in the next 30 minutes.
329
00:11:46,612 --> 00:11:48,666
- Are you sure, Dad?
- Yeah. Let's go.
330
00:11:48,691 --> 00:11:51,328
And maybe you guys can
get a little snoobing in
331
00:11:51,353 --> 00:11:52,869
and the day won't be a total waste.
332
00:11:52,894 --> 00:11:55,796
Okay. Um, sorry we didn't find Grandma.
333
00:11:55,821 --> 00:11:57,170
Bye, Grandma!
334
00:11:57,195 --> 00:12:00,140
And I'm sorry I ate your granola
bar. You didn't miss much.
335
00:12:00,165 --> 00:12:02,815
When we come back, I'll bring
the kind with chocolate chips.
336
00:12:02,840 --> 00:12:05,740
Okay. Crooked cabinet
door is no longer crooked.
337
00:12:05,765 --> 00:12:07,206
Mmm. Eating and working.
338
00:12:07,231 --> 00:12:10,399
Mm-mm-mmm. All right,
what's next on the list?
339
00:12:10,439 --> 00:12:12,013
Oh. A text from Linda.
340
00:12:12,038 --> 00:12:15,299
"Don't eat the meatloaf,
we're saving it for dinner."
341
00:12:15,324 --> 00:12:16,381
What? No!
342
00:12:16,406 --> 00:12:18,369
Ah! I ate their dinner?
343
00:12:18,394 --> 00:12:20,578
Ah, God, what am I gonna do?
344
00:12:20,603 --> 00:12:22,953
Ah! Ah! Think, Teddy, think.
345
00:12:22,978 --> 00:12:25,236
Uh, I could, uh, uh...
346
00:12:25,261 --> 00:12:28,838
Uh, I could... make another
meatloaf. Yes. Good plan.
347
00:12:29,123 --> 00:12:31,273
Okay. Looking up meatloaf recipes.
348
00:12:31,476 --> 00:12:34,053
And I guess I might as well
finish this while I'm doing it.
349
00:12:34,078 --> 00:12:35,578
Oh, that's so good.
350
00:12:36,059 --> 00:12:38,495
Uh, where's your mom?
351
00:12:38,520 --> 00:12:40,686
Is she hiding behind
the seats? That's fun.
352
00:12:40,706 --> 00:12:42,280
Maybe she found a better car?
353
00:12:42,305 --> 00:12:43,943
She's always wanted a PT Cruiser.
354
00:12:43,968 --> 00:12:45,866
Hold on, I'm getting a bunch of texts.
355
00:12:45,891 --> 00:12:48,300
A lot of messages from Teddy.
356
00:12:48,325 --> 00:12:49,674
- Something about a meatloaf.
- Mmm.
357
00:12:49,699 --> 00:12:51,032
Oh, here's one from your mom.
358
00:12:51,057 --> 00:12:52,108
Oh, no.
359
00:12:52,133 --> 00:12:53,537
She went into the cemetery.
360
00:12:53,562 --> 00:12:54,986
She's in there right now looking for us.
361
00:12:55,011 --> 00:12:56,511
- What?
- No!
362
00:12:56,536 --> 00:12:58,721
I'm trying to call her, but it's
going straight to voice mail.
363
00:12:58,746 --> 00:13:01,631
She's probably out of
range. Listen, kids...
364
00:13:01,656 --> 00:13:04,613
- Don't say it, Dad.
- We got to go back in the cemetery.
365
00:13:04,654 --> 00:13:05,799
- He said it.
- Dang it.
366
00:13:05,824 --> 00:13:07,065
We have to find your mom.
367
00:13:07,090 --> 00:13:08,670
First of all, we love her
368
00:13:08,695 --> 00:13:09,953
and we shouldn't abandon her.
369
00:13:09,978 --> 00:13:11,908
And second, she's in the scariest place
370
00:13:11,933 --> 00:13:13,865
imaginable to her, all by herself.
371
00:13:13,890 --> 00:13:16,039
Maybe it's not as bad as
she thought it was gonna be?
372
00:13:18,275 --> 00:13:19,274
Oh, my God!
373
00:13:19,299 --> 00:13:20,854
Ah! Cemetery bird!
374
00:13:21,062 --> 00:13:23,799
Look, I know I couldn't
find my own mother's grave.
375
00:13:23,824 --> 00:13:25,824
But your mom will be easier to find.
376
00:13:25,849 --> 00:13:27,717
I hope. I mean, she's louder.
377
00:13:27,742 --> 00:13:28,782
And then we'll leave
378
00:13:28,807 --> 00:13:31,881
and maybe we'll still be
able to snoob. Possibly.
379
00:13:31,906 --> 00:13:34,499
For 20 minutes or so, before
the snoobing place closes.
380
00:13:34,524 --> 00:13:35,610
But if we can't, at least
381
00:13:35,635 --> 00:13:39,404
- this is your mom's fault and not mine.
- Ah! Parents!
382
00:13:42,201 --> 00:13:44,479
Crap, where is your mom?
383
00:13:44,504 --> 00:13:47,081
Uh, you guys have
been quiet for a while.
384
00:13:47,106 --> 00:13:49,256
Is-is it 'cause, instead of snoobing,
385
00:13:49,281 --> 00:13:51,565
we've been doing this so much?
386
00:13:51,590 --> 00:13:53,924
Hey. Snoobing is just a
joyful thing that kids do,
387
00:13:53,949 --> 00:13:57,149
but getting lost in a cemetery
in the cold is great, too.
388
00:13:57,174 --> 00:13:59,920
We were gonna be zooming down a hill
389
00:13:59,952 --> 00:14:01,676
on an inner tube, using gravity
390
00:14:01,695 --> 00:14:03,947
- for our own sick pleasures.
- I know.
391
00:14:04,014 --> 00:14:05,749
And how are we supposed to find Mom
392
00:14:05,773 --> 00:14:08,202
in a giant cemetery
with the sun going down?
393
00:14:08,227 --> 00:14:11,105
Should we shake some
keys or bang on her food bowl?
394
00:14:11,130 --> 00:14:13,855
Oh, why is it getting
so dark out already?
395
00:14:13,880 --> 00:14:16,548
Stupid winter. And where
the hell is this grave?
396
00:14:16,635 --> 00:14:19,860
Okay, maybe I'll try reading
this terrible map one more time.
397
00:14:19,885 --> 00:14:22,307
Heritage Road and Cedar Lane.
398
00:14:22,332 --> 00:14:25,475
Huh. That gobbledygoop
kind of looks "Heritage."
399
00:14:25,500 --> 00:14:27,335
Oh, I'm close to Bob's mom.
400
00:14:27,360 --> 00:14:28,618
Guys! I'm close!
401
00:14:28,643 --> 00:14:31,107
Oh, sorry. Sorry. Excuse me. Sorry.
402
00:14:31,132 --> 00:14:34,229
Okay, I put all the ingredients
in the bowl. What's next?
403
00:14:34,254 --> 00:14:37,637
"Knead everything together
using your hands." All right.
404
00:14:37,656 --> 00:14:40,192
Ahh! This is how you make meatloaf?
405
00:14:40,217 --> 00:14:41,658
Ugh, oh, gross.
406
00:14:41,683 --> 00:14:44,093
But I got to do it. Teddy, be strong.
407
00:14:44,118 --> 00:14:46,640
Ahh! Ugh! So slimy.
408
00:14:46,665 --> 00:14:50,667
Ohh! Ugh, Bob and Linda
are disgusting. Ugh, ugh.
409
00:14:50,818 --> 00:14:53,456
Well, the sun went down. Damn sun.
410
00:14:53,481 --> 00:14:55,131
Sorry, sun, it's not your fault.
411
00:14:55,156 --> 00:14:57,065
Guys, I-I know I keep saying this,
412
00:14:57,083 --> 00:15:00,343
but I really am sorry that
this day is a total failure.
413
00:15:00,368 --> 00:15:02,662
Hold on. Maybe not a total failure.
414
00:15:02,687 --> 00:15:05,202
What if we snoob right here?
415
00:15:05,242 --> 00:15:06,165
I'm listening.
416
00:15:06,190 --> 00:15:07,506
Look at how steep this hill is.
417
00:15:07,538 --> 00:15:09,043
We can slide down on our bellies.
418
00:15:09,068 --> 00:15:10,258
- Belly-tube.
- Boob.
419
00:15:10,283 --> 00:15:12,557
- Yes.
- I like it, I like it.
420
00:15:12,582 --> 00:15:14,749
Kids, you can't, we
need to find your mom
421
00:15:14,768 --> 00:15:16,113
before they lock up the cemetery.
422
00:15:16,138 --> 00:15:17,707
Come on, Dad. Just a little boobing?
423
00:15:17,732 --> 00:15:20,507
- Please?
- Please? Please, please, please?
424
00:15:20,532 --> 00:15:21,923
Okay, fine.
425
00:15:21,942 --> 00:15:24,733
Just a little bit. And
then w-we go save your mom.
426
00:15:24,758 --> 00:15:25,663
- Yes!
- Yeah.
427
00:15:25,688 --> 00:15:28,930
Ready? One, two, three, go!
428
00:15:28,949 --> 00:15:31,249
♪ ♪
429
00:15:44,282 --> 00:15:46,925
- Yeah!
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
430
00:15:46,950 --> 00:15:49,868
My wedgie's never been bigger
and I've never felt more alive.
431
00:15:50,671 --> 00:15:53,189
Pretty sure this is the spot.
432
00:15:54,256 --> 00:15:57,153
Oh, my God. Bob's mom. I found you.
433
00:15:57,178 --> 00:15:58,771
Where the heck are Bob and the kids?
434
00:15:58,795 --> 00:16:01,036
Did the cemetery eat them? I hope not.
435
00:16:01,061 --> 00:16:02,302
No, right?
436
00:16:02,327 --> 00:16:07,214
Uh, so, I'm Linda,
your daughter-in-law.
437
00:16:07,239 --> 00:16:09,325
Sorry this is the first
time we're meeting.
438
00:16:09,350 --> 00:16:10,970
I wish we met when you were alive,
439
00:16:10,995 --> 00:16:12,627
but I didn't know Bob back then.
440
00:16:12,652 --> 00:16:16,045
Ah, I don't know why I get
so afraid of cemeteries.
441
00:16:16,070 --> 00:16:18,968
I mean, you're here all the
time and you're not complaining.
442
00:16:18,993 --> 00:16:23,346
I guess maybe part of that is cemeteries
443
00:16:23,371 --> 00:16:24,796
kind of make me think about,
444
00:16:24,821 --> 00:16:28,304
you know, losing someone close
to me, like how Bob lost you.
445
00:16:28,329 --> 00:16:31,326
But hey, I got to tell
you, you made a good guy.
446
00:16:31,351 --> 00:16:33,531
Bob's sweet, he's a great dad.
447
00:16:33,556 --> 00:16:35,254
He always remembers to
put the toilet seat down
448
00:16:35,274 --> 00:16:36,756
in the middle of the night.
449
00:16:36,775 --> 00:16:39,183
Except that one time, when
I fell in. That was bad.
450
00:16:39,208 --> 00:16:40,754
I like boobing,
451
00:16:40,779 --> 00:16:43,054
but it's a little hard
on my actual boobs.
452
00:16:43,079 --> 00:16:45,984
Mine are comfortably numb.
I think that's what that song is about.
453
00:16:46,009 --> 00:16:48,409
You could just go down on
your side. A little side boob.
454
00:16:48,434 --> 00:16:49,766
Guys, I'm glad you're all having fun,
455
00:16:49,863 --> 00:16:51,449
but I-I think we need to get back
456
00:16:51,473 --> 00:16:53,513
to finding your possibly terrified mom.
457
00:16:53,608 --> 00:16:54,918
Wow, yeah, it got dark.
458
00:16:54,942 --> 00:16:56,879
There's no way Mom's still here.
459
00:16:56,904 --> 00:16:59,109
She probably left us and found a family
460
00:16:59,134 --> 00:17:01,218
that doesn't wander
around in cemeteries.
461
00:17:01,243 --> 00:17:03,654
Yeah, she's probably back
at the car. So, let's go.
462
00:17:03,679 --> 00:17:05,113
Can you believe it?
463
00:17:05,137 --> 00:17:06,817
- Ah!
- Is that... Mom?
464
00:17:06,863 --> 00:17:09,364
It's either Mom or a talking
bird that's loving life.
465
00:17:09,382 --> 00:17:10,434
- Lin?
- Bob?
466
00:17:10,458 --> 00:17:11,743
Lin? Where are you?
467
00:17:11,768 --> 00:17:13,270
I'm at your mom's grave.
468
00:17:13,294 --> 00:17:14,494
Where are you?
469
00:17:14,554 --> 00:17:16,629
Just stay there. We'll come to you.
470
00:17:16,648 --> 00:17:18,961
Keep saying stuff,
we'll follow your voice.
471
00:17:18,986 --> 00:17:22,134
Okay. Na-na-na-na-na-na.
472
00:17:22,159 --> 00:17:23,613
She's coming from over there.
473
00:17:23,638 --> 00:17:25,438
- Na-na-na-na.
- Lin.
474
00:17:25,490 --> 00:17:26,881
Na-na-na-na-na-na.
475
00:17:26,900 --> 00:17:28,786
Okay, yeah, we all see each other.
476
00:17:28,810 --> 00:17:29,817
- Na-na-na-na-na.
- So, you don't
477
00:17:29,841 --> 00:17:32,326
have to do that anymore.
Not that we don't all love it.
478
00:17:32,351 --> 00:17:33,667
Where have you guys been?
479
00:17:33,692 --> 00:17:35,793
Oh, wait, that-that must
be the groundskeeper.
480
00:17:35,817 --> 00:17:37,703
I-I guess we should flag him down?
481
00:17:37,727 --> 00:17:39,836
Dad, no. He's gonna make us leave.
482
00:17:39,925 --> 00:17:42,092
We finally made it to Grandma's grave.
483
00:17:42,117 --> 00:17:43,525
You need to have your visit.
484
00:17:43,550 --> 00:17:45,958
And maybe we want to have
a visit with Grandma, too.
485
00:17:46,178 --> 00:17:47,418
Okay. All right.
486
00:17:47,512 --> 00:17:49,306
What are you doing? Come over here.
487
00:17:49,330 --> 00:17:51,848
- The truck is getting closer.
- Quick, hide.
488
00:17:51,873 --> 00:17:53,499
Okay. Lin, hide.
489
00:17:53,518 --> 00:17:54,977
Huh? Why are we hiding?
490
00:17:55,002 --> 00:17:56,980
Because the ghosts are
coming? Oh, God. Oh, God.
491
00:17:57,004 --> 00:17:58,671
No, we got to hide
from the groundskeeper.
492
00:17:58,690 --> 00:18:00,150
It-it's a long story,
I'll tell you later.
493
00:18:00,174 --> 00:18:01,651
Just hide, quick, please.
494
00:18:01,676 --> 00:18:03,585
- Oh, okay.
- I love how Mom will hide
495
00:18:03,603 --> 00:18:06,363
from any authority figure
under any circumstance.
496
00:18:06,388 --> 00:18:08,458
Oh, yeah. She'd take him
out if we told her to.
497
00:18:08,483 --> 00:18:10,300
- What? We're taking him out?
- No. No, no, no.
498
00:18:10,325 --> 00:18:11,607
Okay, no one move.
499
00:18:11,632 --> 00:18:13,238
I'm just gonna pick a wedgie real quick.
500
00:18:13,263 --> 00:18:14,429
- Tina, no.
- I'm doing it.
501
00:18:14,447 --> 00:18:16,581
Ah, I did it. Oh, it's already back.
502
00:18:19,502 --> 00:18:21,739
So we're hiding from
groundskeepers? I like it.
503
00:18:21,764 --> 00:18:24,173
I'm glad it's not ghosts.
No offense, ghosts.
504
00:18:24,198 --> 00:18:25,751
So, where the heck have you guys been?
505
00:18:25,775 --> 00:18:27,959
We got really lost. And
then we got lost again.
506
00:18:28,053 --> 00:18:30,067
You should've gotten a
map from that little lodge.
507
00:18:30,092 --> 00:18:32,447
It's an office, it's
not a lodge. And we did.
508
00:18:32,465 --> 00:18:34,436
- Oh.
- Can you be map-blind?
509
00:18:34,461 --> 00:18:37,477
- Because if so, Dad's that.
- Shh. Here he comes.
510
00:18:41,458 --> 00:18:42,498
Go around the bush.
511
00:18:47,440 --> 00:18:48,698
Oh, thank God.
512
00:18:48,723 --> 00:18:51,494
Wow. Lin, I can't believe
you're in a cemetery.
513
00:18:51,519 --> 00:18:53,519
In the dark. And you were by yourself.
514
00:18:53,637 --> 00:18:55,383
Well, not really. I was with your mom.
515
00:18:55,408 --> 00:18:56,448
We had a nice talk.
516
00:18:56,473 --> 00:18:57,639
I mean, I did the talking.
517
00:18:57,657 --> 00:18:59,899
And it helped me relax, a little.
518
00:18:59,924 --> 00:19:01,453
Also, I was picturing myself
519
00:19:01,478 --> 00:19:03,249
- in Jamaica the whole time.
- Hmm.
520
00:19:03,274 --> 00:19:07,459
So, here we are. Bob's mom,
these are your grandchildren.
521
00:19:07,484 --> 00:19:08,811
The ones I was telling you about.
522
00:19:08,835 --> 00:19:10,146
- Hi.
- Hey, you.
523
00:19:10,171 --> 00:19:12,388
Uh, hi, Grandma. We made you cards.
524
00:19:12,413 --> 00:19:13,557
We're not allowed to leave them here,
525
00:19:13,581 --> 00:19:15,414
but we can show them to you.
526
00:19:15,434 --> 00:19:16,801
Here's mine. Pretty good, huh?
527
00:19:16,826 --> 00:19:18,770
Be easy on Louise and Gene. They tried.
528
00:19:18,794 --> 00:19:20,586
Bob, move closer.
529
00:19:20,605 --> 00:19:22,346
And maybe change your face
530
00:19:22,499 --> 00:19:24,950
so it's not so "I'm Bob,
I'm a terrible person"?
531
00:19:24,975 --> 00:19:28,790
Yep, yep, no, I-I
know. I-I-I just, yeah.
532
00:19:28,815 --> 00:19:31,816
Listen. I think I know
your mom well enough to know
533
00:19:31,841 --> 00:19:34,223
that she would be okay with
you not coming till now.
534
00:19:34,248 --> 00:19:36,435
Because she'd want you to
be busy living your life,
535
00:19:36,455 --> 00:19:38,174
with your three beautiful children,
536
00:19:38,198 --> 00:19:39,772
and your fun, hot wife Linda.
537
00:19:39,791 --> 00:19:42,684
And she'd be so proud of you.
I mean, look what you've done.
538
00:19:42,702 --> 00:19:44,664
With the restaurant, with this family.
539
00:19:44,688 --> 00:19:46,422
- Tina, take your hand out of your butt.
- Sorry.
540
00:19:46,447 --> 00:19:48,453
- Thanks, Lin.
- Okay, kids, step back.
541
00:19:48,478 --> 00:19:50,295
You're hogging Grandma.
542
00:19:50,899 --> 00:19:52,178
Hi, Mom.
543
00:19:53,546 --> 00:19:54,862
That was a nice visit.
544
00:19:54,881 --> 00:19:55,881
Until Gene farted.
545
00:19:56,032 --> 00:19:57,623
It wasn't me, it was a cemetery ghost.
546
00:19:57,642 --> 00:19:58,533
It was me.
547
00:19:58,620 --> 00:20:00,195
Yeah, we're locked in.
548
00:20:00,220 --> 00:20:03,381
He did say he was gonna do
that and then I guess he did it.
549
00:20:03,406 --> 00:20:06,557
- Good for him for following through.
- So, uh, what do we do?
550
00:20:06,710 --> 00:20:08,543
I don't know. Maybe we...
551
00:20:08,561 --> 00:20:10,730
Oh, your mom's already
climbing the fence.
552
00:20:10,755 --> 00:20:12,880
Let's get the hell out
of here. Come on, come on.
553
00:20:12,882 --> 00:20:14,168
Ah, coming.
554
00:20:14,193 --> 00:20:15,451
Ah, first boobing and now
555
00:20:15,476 --> 00:20:16,659
climbing a cemetery fence?
556
00:20:16,811 --> 00:20:18,328
Is this the best night ever?
557
00:20:18,479 --> 00:20:19,532
Ah, my snow pants.
558
00:20:19,556 --> 00:20:21,146
Well, no more wedgie, I guess.
559
00:20:21,166 --> 00:20:24,125
Wait, I'm not sure if I can
climb this without a boost.
560
00:20:24,150 --> 00:20:25,810
- Ghost boost?
- Who you gonna call?
561
00:20:25,834 --> 00:20:26,899
Ghost boosters!
562
00:20:26,924 --> 00:20:28,630
Oh, God, I'm getting in the car!
563
00:20:28,781 --> 00:20:30,389
Eh, looks pretty good.
564
00:20:30,414 --> 00:20:33,081
Not exactly like the
one I ate, but not bad.
565
00:20:33,175 --> 00:20:35,159
Anyway, they're gonna
be really surprised
566
00:20:35,177 --> 00:20:37,414
- that's it's hot out of the oven.
- Teddy?
567
00:20:37,438 --> 00:20:38,845
Ahh! Oh, jeez.
568
00:20:38,870 --> 00:20:41,353
Oh, my God. Uh, uh...
569
00:20:41,517 --> 00:20:44,501
Go back outside for an hour and
a half and-and then come back.
570
00:20:44,594 --> 00:20:46,094
Okay.
571
00:20:46,113 --> 00:20:47,671
♪ Who's got eyes that sparkle ♪
572
00:20:47,690 --> 00:20:50,674
♪ like a lily sprinkled with dew? ♪
573
00:20:50,693 --> 00:20:53,631
♪ Lily Belle ♪
574
00:20:53,656 --> 00:20:56,415
♪ And who's got lips as
fresh as autumn rain ♪
575
00:20:56,440 --> 00:20:59,183
♪ When summer is through? ♪
576
00:20:59,572 --> 00:21:02,104
♪ Lily Belle ♪
577
00:21:02,255 --> 00:21:06,758
♪ And, oh, incidentally ♪
578
00:21:06,783 --> 00:21:10,890
♪ There's one more thing to tell ♪
579
00:21:10,915 --> 00:21:15,009
♪ If your eyes are open and you
think you're seeing a dream ♪
580
00:21:15,469 --> 00:21:17,436
♪ It's Lily Belle. ♪
581
00:21:17,461 --> 00:21:22,109
- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -
-- for www.addic7ed.com --