1
00:00:02,503 --> 00:00:04,211
Linda:
So, everyone enjoying the dinner
2
00:00:04,296 --> 00:00:05,879
Your father and I
nicely made you?
3
00:00:05,965 --> 00:00:07,923
Don't be afraid
to shout out compliments.
4
00:00:08,092 --> 00:00:09,341
Tina:
Oh, sorry. It's really good.
5
00:00:09,468 --> 00:00:11,301
-Thank you.
-It's chicken, right?
6
00:00:11,345 --> 00:00:12,886
- Yes, tina.
-I knew it.
7
00:00:13,014 --> 00:00:15,472
Sorry, mom, I'm just still
sort of reeling from school,
8
00:00:15,558 --> 00:00:17,766
Where my grape-flavored
finger pop-pet
9
00:00:17,893 --> 00:00:19,309
Was cruelly taken from me!
10
00:00:19,437 --> 00:00:21,603
Yeah, you've mentioned
the finger candy thing.
11
00:00:21,731 --> 00:00:23,063
Finger pop-pet!
12
00:00:23,107 --> 00:00:24,940
Whoops. Hey.
13
00:00:25,067 --> 00:00:27,276
-No candy in class.
-But I wasn't eating it.
14
00:00:27,361 --> 00:00:28,727
Then why does it look
half-eaten?
15
00:00:28,821 --> 00:00:30,696
Because I've been savoring it,
16
00:00:30,823 --> 00:00:32,156
Slowly and responsibly.
17
00:00:32,241 --> 00:00:34,158
Well, I'm gonna savor
doing this.
18
00:00:34,243 --> 00:00:35,909
Louise: No, no, no, no, no, no!
Not the trash, no...
19
00:00:36,037 --> 00:00:38,370
And that's why grown-ups
are monsters.
20
00:00:38,497 --> 00:00:41,540
Okay. Uh, sorry
about that, louise,
21
00:00:41,667 --> 00:00:44,793
But, uh, kids,
we wanted to talk to you
22
00:00:44,879 --> 00:00:46,378
-About something.
-Right.
23
00:00:46,464 --> 00:00:48,964
Are we all getting
matching jumpsuits finally?
24
00:00:49,091 --> 00:00:50,007
-No.
-(gene groans)
25
00:00:50,134 --> 00:00:51,508
So, uh, starting tomorrow,
26
00:00:51,635 --> 00:00:54,762
Your father and I
thought it would be good
27
00:00:54,889 --> 00:00:58,265
And also re-really fun
to do chores.
28
00:00:58,350 --> 00:01:00,059
-Chores?
-Didn't we try those before
29
00:01:00,144 --> 00:01:02,061
And we were all like, "nah"?
30
00:01:02,146 --> 00:01:03,353
Uh, we're-we're gonna
try it again.
31
00:01:03,522 --> 00:01:05,272
Yep, you're gonna
clean the bathroom,
32
00:01:05,357 --> 00:01:08,108
Vacuum the floors,
dust... Stuff.
33
00:01:08,235 --> 00:01:10,778
Um, are we getting a raise
in our very meager allowance
34
00:01:10,863 --> 00:01:12,529
Because of these
so-called chores?
35
00:01:12,615 --> 00:01:14,490
Yeah! I mean, yeah.
36
00:01:14,575 --> 00:01:15,991
No. I think the reward
37
00:01:16,077 --> 00:01:18,452
Is that you are contributing
to this family.
38
00:01:18,537 --> 00:01:20,788
And learning that
it's important to pitch in
39
00:01:20,873 --> 00:01:23,373
In society and stuff like that.
40
00:01:23,459 --> 00:01:25,542
You know, we do work
in the restaurant.
41
00:01:25,628 --> 00:01:27,336
Every day. For free.
42
00:01:27,421 --> 00:01:29,546
Not that any of us have called
child welfare or anything.
43
00:01:29,632 --> 00:01:30,798
Except for that one time.
44
00:01:30,925 --> 00:01:32,216
I didn't love that you did that.
45
00:01:32,301 --> 00:01:33,634
But the guy we talked to
was nice.
46
00:01:33,719 --> 00:01:35,469
Oh, yeah. Todd. What's he up to?
47
00:01:35,596 --> 00:01:38,180
Where is all this chore stuff
coming from, anyway?
48
00:01:38,224 --> 00:01:39,973
-Npr?
-Well, if you must know,
49
00:01:40,101 --> 00:01:42,810
I was talking to grandma gloria
the other day
50
00:01:42,895 --> 00:01:44,978
And she reminded me
that they made me and gayle
51
00:01:45,064 --> 00:01:47,272
Do chores every weekend
when we were growing up.
52
00:01:47,399 --> 00:01:49,316
And she thought we should
be doing it with you kids.
53
00:01:49,485 --> 00:01:51,110
She actually thought
we already were,
54
00:01:51,195 --> 00:01:52,903
And I said we tried,
but it didn't really stick
55
00:01:52,947 --> 00:01:54,729
And then she made
that "hmph" sound.
56
00:01:54,782 --> 00:01:55,948
Ugh, grandma gloria.
57
00:01:56,033 --> 00:01:57,574
No huggies from genie
for a year.
58
00:01:57,701 --> 00:02:01,703
All right. Well, what if
we refuse to do these chores?
59
00:02:01,747 --> 00:02:03,622
-Yeah.
-Respectfully?
60
00:02:03,666 --> 00:02:06,625
Okay, well, then,
I would respectfully say
61
00:02:06,710 --> 00:02:08,252
You don't have a choice.
62
00:02:08,379 --> 00:02:10,337
-Right, bob?
-Uh, uh, right.
63
00:02:10,464 --> 00:02:12,673
Well, then,
we're going to respectfully
64
00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:14,091
Stop eating our vegetables.
65
00:02:14,176 --> 00:02:16,343
Gene, tina? Want to stop
eating your broccoli?
66
00:02:16,428 --> 00:02:17,678
(whispering):
But I like broccoli.
67
00:02:17,763 --> 00:02:18,971
-Tina!
-Right, sorry.
68
00:02:19,098 --> 00:02:20,681
(normal volume):
Well, then, you are respectfully
69
00:02:20,766 --> 00:02:21,807
Not getting any dessert.
70
00:02:21,934 --> 00:02:24,560
-Damn it!
-Okay, then we are respectfully
71
00:02:24,728 --> 00:02:26,478
-Not doing our homework.
-Ooh.
72
00:02:26,564 --> 00:02:28,397
You're gonna play
this game with mama?
73
00:02:28,524 --> 00:02:29,857
Oh, yeah.
74
00:02:29,942 --> 00:02:32,025
Oh, good.
75
00:02:34,155 --> 00:02:35,654
(whispering):
But lin, "no tv"
76
00:02:35,739 --> 00:02:38,448
-Means we don't get to watch tv.
-Show no weakness.
77
00:02:38,534 --> 00:02:40,534
-They're gonna crack.
-What if they don't crack?
78
00:02:40,619 --> 00:02:41,827
I'm worried
they're not cracking.
79
00:02:41,954 --> 00:02:43,203
Louise (normal volume):
Mm-mmm. Nope.
80
00:02:43,330 --> 00:02:44,621
-Not brushing them.
-(groans)
81
00:02:44,665 --> 00:02:45,914
-Bob: Mm.
-And if we get painful cavities,
82
00:02:46,083 --> 00:02:48,876
-We'll be the ones laughing.
-Yeah. Wait.
83
00:02:48,961 --> 00:02:50,335
Linda:
Okay, early bedtime,
84
00:02:50,421 --> 00:02:52,671
In your room, lights out, now.
85
00:02:52,756 --> 00:02:54,965
-Nuh-uh. Not going to bed.
-Until we get tired.
86
00:02:55,092 --> 00:02:56,166
-Yeah.
-Guys.
87
00:02:56,260 --> 00:02:57,759
-I mean, never.
-Right.
88
00:02:57,887 --> 00:03:00,137
-Okay, then, no...
-What?
89
00:03:00,264 --> 00:03:01,597
-No...
-You got nothing.
90
00:03:01,682 --> 00:03:03,807
No, no christmas ever again!
91
00:03:03,893 --> 00:03:06,810
Uh, linda, want to have
a quick chat?
92
00:03:06,896 --> 00:03:09,313
I feel like it's not going well.
93
00:03:09,398 --> 00:03:11,064
What-what if I go buy
a bag of candy
94
00:03:11,150 --> 00:03:12,357
And we give them candy
95
00:03:12,443 --> 00:03:13,942
-If they do the chores?
-No, bob.
96
00:03:14,028 --> 00:03:15,485
They should do chores
'cause we told them to
97
00:03:15,571 --> 00:03:17,362
And 'cause it'll make them
better people in society
98
00:03:17,448 --> 00:03:18,947
And all that crap,
not to get candy.
99
00:03:19,074 --> 00:03:21,325
I mean, what if they turn
into little delinquents
100
00:03:21,410 --> 00:03:24,578
Who won't listen to authority
and it-it ruins their lives?
101
00:03:24,663 --> 00:03:27,247
Then we'll just pretend
we don't know them?
102
00:03:27,374 --> 00:03:28,290
Hmm. Maybe.
103
00:03:28,375 --> 00:03:29,750
Well, the kids
have to go to bed.
104
00:03:29,877 --> 00:03:32,294
So, we need a cease-fire,
I think.
105
00:03:32,338 --> 00:03:34,463
(sighs)
okay, fine. You're right.
106
00:03:34,590 --> 00:03:36,131
Eh, we'll-we'll put a pin
in the chores thing
107
00:03:36,258 --> 00:03:38,342
And figure out a way
to make them do them tomorrow.
108
00:03:38,469 --> 00:03:39,635
Blackmail, maybe?
109
00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:41,470
Have you been writing
stuff down? I haven't.
110
00:03:41,597 --> 00:03:43,055
-(groans)
-kids.
111
00:03:43,182 --> 00:03:44,932
Come in here. Come on.
112
00:03:45,017 --> 00:03:46,808
-Okay.
-Hmm.
113
00:03:46,936 --> 00:03:49,186
I'm sorry about
that "no christmas" thing.
114
00:03:49,313 --> 00:03:51,146
Come on. Come up
in the bed with mama.
115
00:03:51,232 --> 00:03:53,273
-Come on.
-Are you gonna kill us?
116
00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:54,483
No.
117
00:03:54,568 --> 00:03:57,027
Let's, uh, revisit
the chores thing later.
118
00:03:57,112 --> 00:03:59,238
Why don't we all
just relax, huh?
119
00:03:59,365 --> 00:04:01,490
(yawns)
so tired, right?
120
00:04:01,533 --> 00:04:03,784
-No.
-Yes. Should we sing
a nice song
121
00:04:03,869 --> 00:04:06,662
Or tell a bedtime story? Huh?
122
00:04:06,789 --> 00:04:08,372
A bedtime story?
Like you guys used to do?
123
00:04:08,457 --> 00:04:10,707
-Back when we were children?
-Oh, yeah, dad,
124
00:04:10,793 --> 00:04:13,794
You used to tell that story
about pepperoni the sleepy pony.
125
00:04:13,996 --> 00:04:16,004
-Oh, right.
-Aw, pepperoni.
126
00:04:16,131 --> 00:04:19,007
Roaming the plains, looking
for a nice place to sleep.
127
00:04:19,134 --> 00:04:20,634
-And a little pepperoni.
-Gene: Aren't we all?
128
00:04:20,719 --> 00:04:22,177
Tell that story, bob.
129
00:04:22,221 --> 00:04:24,513
Okay. Um, I think I remember it.
130
00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:27,349
-But maybe he's not sleepy.
-And maybe he's really buff?
131
00:04:27,434 --> 00:04:30,143
But also super humble.
About how buff he is.
132
00:04:30,271 --> 00:04:32,312
But he's still into pepperoni.
133
00:04:32,398 --> 00:04:33,647
Uh, okay, so,
134
00:04:33,732 --> 00:04:36,984
Pepperoni the super buff pony
wanders around,
135
00:04:37,069 --> 00:04:40,070
Looking for a place
to, um, not sleep.
136
00:04:40,239 --> 00:04:42,239
And he ends up in a town.
137
00:04:42,366 --> 00:04:44,408
It was a small mining town
138
00:04:44,493 --> 00:04:47,536
-Called w-western-ville.
-Linda: Oh, that's good.
139
00:04:47,621 --> 00:04:49,079
Bob:
And there were three siblings
that lived there,
140
00:04:49,206 --> 00:04:51,164
The belch-earps.
141
00:04:51,250 --> 00:04:52,791
The-the bearps.
142
00:04:52,876 --> 00:04:54,167
And they operated
the town's tavern.
143
00:04:54,253 --> 00:04:55,585
The youngest ran the bar
144
00:04:55,671 --> 00:04:56,962
And the gambling side
of things...
145
00:04:57,089 --> 00:04:58,630
Louise:
Oh, and give me giant boots
146
00:04:58,799 --> 00:05:00,090
With huge spurs on the back.
147
00:05:00,175 --> 00:05:03,051
-And the front.
-Bob: Uh, okay, sure.
148
00:05:03,137 --> 00:05:04,761
A-and the middle one
ran the entertainment.
149
00:05:04,847 --> 00:05:06,638
Gene:
And I have one of those
player pianos.
150
00:05:06,724 --> 00:05:08,181
But I can carry it around.
151
00:05:08,225 --> 00:05:10,058
Bob:
You carry around a player piano?
152
00:05:10,185 --> 00:05:12,394
-Yeah, because
it's cutting-edge.
-All right.
153
00:05:12,479 --> 00:05:14,813
Uh, and the oldest
runs the hotel and stables.
154
00:05:14,898 --> 00:05:17,357
Tina:
Well, more of a horse hotel
that also has rooms for people.
155
00:05:17,484 --> 00:05:18,567
Right this way, sir.
156
00:05:18,652 --> 00:05:20,652
-It's classy.
-Linda: (clears throat)
157
00:05:20,779 --> 00:05:23,322
And, uh, maybe there's some
nice sheriffs in this town.
158
00:05:23,407 --> 00:05:25,282
-M-married sheriffs.
-Bob: Uh, okay.
159
00:05:25,367 --> 00:05:27,743
Linda:
Yeah, and they're really great,
but the townspeople
160
00:05:27,870 --> 00:05:29,995
Don't listen to the sheriffs
because the townspeople
161
00:05:30,122 --> 00:05:32,497
Can be big pains in the butt
sometimes.
162
00:05:32,624 --> 00:05:35,959
But I thought this was supposed
to be a relaxing bedtime story?
163
00:05:36,045 --> 00:05:38,253
-Yeah, so one
of the sheriffs says...
-Yeah.
164
00:05:38,339 --> 00:05:40,213
Hey, bearps,
maybe you could try and keep
165
00:05:40,299 --> 00:05:41,757
Your area nice and clean today?
166
00:05:41,842 --> 00:05:43,175
Hmm, let me think about that.
167
00:05:43,260 --> 00:05:44,843
(blows raspberry)
oh, and also...
168
00:05:44,970 --> 00:05:46,261
-(blows raspberry)
-but I mean,
169
00:05:46,347 --> 00:05:49,348
Maybe you could, you know,
sweep up all the glass?
170
00:05:49,433 --> 00:05:51,683
Um, I think I know
the gambling business, m'kay?
171
00:05:51,769 --> 00:05:54,478
(grunts) it's read 'em and weep,
not read 'em and sweep.
172
00:05:54,605 --> 00:05:56,897
♪ and I'm not cleaning up
anything, either ♪
173
00:05:56,982 --> 00:05:59,358
♪ in the wild, wild west. ♪
174
00:05:59,485 --> 00:06:02,152
Linda:
They wouldn't listen to anything
the married sheriffs said,
175
00:06:02,237 --> 00:06:03,445
Who were actually a lot older
176
00:06:03,530 --> 00:06:05,489
And smarter
than the townspeople,
177
00:06:05,574 --> 00:06:07,366
But still good-looking
for their age.
178
00:06:07,451 --> 00:06:08,909
But there was a reason
the townspeople
179
00:06:08,994 --> 00:06:10,869
Didn't want to listen
to the married sheriffs.
180
00:06:10,996 --> 00:06:12,579
-No, there wasn't.
-Yes, there was.
181
00:06:12,664 --> 00:06:14,539
-Because one night...
-Hey, you're not telling
the story.
182
00:06:14,666 --> 00:06:16,249
Because one night,
183
00:06:16,293 --> 00:06:18,460
After they ordered
the townspeople to go to bed...
184
00:06:18,629 --> 00:06:20,796
-Linda: Townspeople, go to bed.
-Bob: Yeah.
185
00:06:20,881 --> 00:06:22,214
-Linda: 'cause we're the boss.
-Yeah.
186
00:06:22,341 --> 00:06:23,507
Louise:
And after all the old-timey
187
00:06:23,634 --> 00:06:24,966
Old west lights were out,
188
00:06:25,085 --> 00:06:27,010
The married sheriffs
got on their horses
189
00:06:27,096 --> 00:06:29,054
And they rode off
into the night.
190
00:06:29,172 --> 00:06:30,806
But not everyone went to bed.
191
00:06:30,891 --> 00:06:33,058
The three bearps
followed the sheriffs.
192
00:06:33,143 --> 00:06:34,601
Attaboy, pepperoni.
193
00:06:34,645 --> 00:06:37,187
Three riders on him and
he's not even breaking a sweat.
194
00:06:37,314 --> 00:06:38,814
So buff.
195
00:06:38,899 --> 00:06:40,649
Louise:
They tracked them to the mine
outside of town.
196
00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:43,443
And there, they discovered
that the married sheriffs
197
00:06:43,487 --> 00:06:45,570
Were having a sneaky
nighttime meeting
198
00:06:45,656 --> 00:06:50,200
With owner of the mine and
super rich guy mr. Goldoeder.
199
00:06:50,285 --> 00:06:52,119
Hello. I was just
kissing my gold good night.
200
00:06:52,246 --> 00:06:54,955
So, how's the secret plan
to have those nitwit townspeople
201
00:06:55,082 --> 00:06:57,082
Keep the place
nice and tidy going?
202
00:06:57,167 --> 00:07:00,168
So that big g will be impressed
and want to buy the town,
203
00:07:00,295 --> 00:07:04,131
The mine and all this land,
and we get our big payout?
204
00:07:04,216 --> 00:07:07,008
Wait, what? No, the married
sheriffs are good guys.
205
00:07:07,094 --> 00:07:08,552
Yeah, that's what
they want you to think.
206
00:07:08,637 --> 00:07:11,179
It turns out their intentions
were not so good.
207
00:07:11,265 --> 00:07:13,849
-In fact, they were bad.
-No.
208
00:07:13,934 --> 00:07:16,560
And all to serve
their own greedy purposes.
209
00:07:16,645 --> 00:07:18,145
-No.
-(grunts)
210
00:07:18,313 --> 00:07:20,313
Louise (whispering):
We got to get rid
of the married sheriffs.
211
00:07:20,399 --> 00:07:21,940
-Tina: Yep.
-Gene: The merriffs?
That what I call them.
212
00:07:22,067 --> 00:07:23,733
-(pepperoni sighs)
-gene: Pepperoni likes it.
213
00:07:27,990 --> 00:07:29,364
So, the plan--
the tidy townspeople plan--
214
00:07:29,408 --> 00:07:30,532
Catch me up.
How's it going?
215
00:07:30,576 --> 00:07:31,825
It's going really good.
216
00:07:31,994 --> 00:07:34,244
-It-it's not going good.
-It's not going good.
217
00:07:34,329 --> 00:07:35,704
Well, you two need to get tough.
218
00:07:35,831 --> 00:07:36,955
Maybe make an example
of one of them.
219
00:07:37,082 --> 00:07:38,915
Blast 'em with your
bean blaster.
220
00:07:39,001 --> 00:07:40,459
Like this. Pew!
221
00:07:40,627 --> 00:07:43,170
That's uh, the exact rock
I was aiming to hit.
222
00:07:43,297 --> 00:07:44,838
I should have,
uh, said that beforehand.
223
00:07:44,965 --> 00:07:46,465
Anyway, everything
has to be perfect
224
00:07:46,550 --> 00:07:48,175
For when big g comes.
225
00:07:48,302 --> 00:07:50,260
She does not approve
of messy towns
226
00:07:50,387 --> 00:07:52,179
Or ill-behaved townspeople.
227
00:07:52,264 --> 00:07:53,847
And if big g doesn't approve,
228
00:07:53,932 --> 00:07:55,515
Then she's not gonna buy us out
229
00:07:55,601 --> 00:07:56,808
And we don't get the money,
230
00:07:56,852 --> 00:07:58,810
Which I know
we're all big fans of.
231
00:07:58,937 --> 00:08:01,188
Don't worry, we'll make sure
big g is happy.
232
00:08:01,273 --> 00:08:02,814
(sniffs)
what am I smelling?
233
00:08:02,941 --> 00:08:05,567
Oh, that's me.
I-I don't wash myself.
234
00:08:05,652 --> 00:08:07,152
That's...
(sighs) okay.
235
00:08:07,237 --> 00:08:08,570
So, the townspeople
had to figure out
236
00:08:08,697 --> 00:08:11,448
How to get rid of the terrible,
greedy, smelly sheriffs.
237
00:08:11,533 --> 00:08:13,450
(whispering): What if I just
pop down to the pharmacy
238
00:08:13,577 --> 00:08:15,577
And ask for drugs
that put kids to sleep?
239
00:08:15,662 --> 00:08:17,913
Probably not. But maybe?
240
00:08:17,998 --> 00:08:19,206
(normal volume):
Anyway, the three siblings had
241
00:08:19,333 --> 00:08:20,916
A secret meeting of their own.
242
00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:23,251
Okay, all the townspeople
chipped in.
243
00:08:23,295 --> 00:08:25,128
We've got about
a thousand dollars here.
244
00:08:25,214 --> 00:08:28,131
Tina:
Or we can offer you and your
horses a free, all expenses paid
245
00:08:28,217 --> 00:08:29,925
Weekend here at the inn,
246
00:08:29,968 --> 00:08:31,760
Which includes drinks,
horse massages,
247
00:08:31,845 --> 00:08:33,678
Our finest
pretty-clean chamber pots.
248
00:08:33,764 --> 00:08:35,305
Your own personal entertainer.
249
00:08:35,432 --> 00:08:37,265
♪ look at you,
using your chamber pot. ♪
250
00:08:37,392 --> 00:08:38,975
I think we'll just
take the money.
251
00:08:39,061 --> 00:08:40,060
But I like that song.
252
00:08:40,187 --> 00:08:42,062
So, how exactly does the whole
253
00:08:42,189 --> 00:08:44,356
"taking someone and leaving them
in the middle of nowhere"
254
00:08:44,483 --> 00:08:45,357
Business work?
255
00:08:45,442 --> 00:08:46,900
Well, basically
we just take 'em
256
00:08:47,069 --> 00:08:48,777
And then we, uh, leave 'em
in the middle of nowhere.
257
00:08:48,862 --> 00:08:49,945
Louise:
Okay, then.
258
00:08:50,072 --> 00:08:50,946
Yup, with no money,
259
00:08:51,114 --> 00:08:52,322
Uncomfortable walking shoes,
260
00:08:52,449 --> 00:08:54,908
Only, like, a super small
thing of sunscreen.
261
00:08:54,993 --> 00:08:55,742
No podcasts.
262
00:08:55,827 --> 00:08:57,118
Okay, but what if then,
263
00:08:57,204 --> 00:08:59,079
One of the leave-in-
the-middle-of-nowhere guys
264
00:08:59,164 --> 00:09:00,205
Starts asking some questions?
265
00:09:00,290 --> 00:09:01,289
Are you sure you want to
266
00:09:01,375 --> 00:09:02,749
Get rid of the married sheriffs?
267
00:09:02,834 --> 00:09:04,167
I mean, uh I haven't
been here long,
268
00:09:04,294 --> 00:09:05,502
But they seem nice to me.
269
00:09:05,671 --> 00:09:07,045
And-and loving, I want to say?
270
00:09:07,130 --> 00:09:09,714
Yeah, and wise. Like,
they've got all this wisdom
271
00:09:09,841 --> 00:09:11,716
To pass on about life,
and the world...
272
00:09:11,802 --> 00:09:12,676
Uh-uh, uh-uh, uh-uh.
273
00:09:12,761 --> 00:09:14,094
They're forcing us to do chores.
274
00:09:14,221 --> 00:09:15,136
-(gasps)
-do what?
275
00:09:15,222 --> 00:09:16,805
No way. You guys seem like
276
00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:18,598
You work so hard all the time.
277
00:09:18,725 --> 00:09:19,808
And you're delightful.
278
00:09:19,893 --> 00:09:21,476
-I know.
-Well, I'm gonna enjoy
279
00:09:21,562 --> 00:09:23,019
Leaving them
in the middle of nowhere.
280
00:09:23,146 --> 00:09:25,230
And maybe only one
bathroom break on the way,
281
00:09:25,315 --> 00:09:26,815
And then, after that,
we'll be like,
282
00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:28,525
-"you got to hold it."
-yeah.
283
00:09:28,610 --> 00:09:30,652
But if we have to go,
we still stop.
284
00:09:30,779 --> 00:09:32,445
I-I have a small bladder.
285
00:09:32,531 --> 00:09:33,947
But a big heart.
286
00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:36,616
Linda (whispering):
Married sheriff bob,
287
00:09:36,785 --> 00:09:38,201
I think something weird
might be going on.
288
00:09:38,328 --> 00:09:40,370
Bob:
Why, 'cause some strangers
threw us on a horse
289
00:09:40,455 --> 00:09:42,163
-And put a blanket over us?
-Yeah.
290
00:09:42,249 --> 00:09:43,623
I'm beginning to think
maybe this isn't
291
00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:45,875
About a surprise
birthday party for us at all.
292
00:09:46,003 --> 00:09:49,045
I mean, for one thing, it's not
anywhere close to our birthdays.
293
00:09:49,131 --> 00:09:50,130
Yeah. Come to think of it,
294
00:09:50,215 --> 00:09:51,548
I was actually the one who said
295
00:09:51,633 --> 00:09:53,341
"is this, like, a surprise
birthday party thing?"
296
00:09:53,427 --> 00:09:54,926
And they said "sure, whatever."
297
00:09:55,053 --> 00:09:56,386
(normal volume):
Ooh, that's bright.
298
00:09:56,513 --> 00:09:58,221
-Where are we?
-The middle of nowhere.
299
00:09:58,348 --> 00:09:59,723
-What town is that near?
-None.
300
00:09:59,808 --> 00:10:01,683
-This is your stop.
-Aah!
-Aah!
301
00:10:01,727 --> 00:10:04,728
Can we have our bean blasters
back? No reason. Also,
302
00:10:04,846 --> 00:10:07,647
Can you maybe give us
your bean blasters? No reason.
303
00:10:07,733 --> 00:10:08,815
-Nope.
-Bob: Fair enough.
304
00:10:08,942 --> 00:10:10,317
And don't you start
pleading with us
305
00:10:10,402 --> 00:10:11,818
Not to leave you here
'cause we don't feel
306
00:10:11,987 --> 00:10:13,236
Emotionally compromised
about this at all.
307
00:10:13,322 --> 00:10:15,405
Uh, please don't leave us here?
308
00:10:15,532 --> 00:10:16,740
-Dang it!
-Please!
309
00:10:16,867 --> 00:10:18,366
I'm not wearing
the right bra for this.
310
00:10:18,493 --> 00:10:20,076
Sorry. Best of luck.
311
00:10:20,912 --> 00:10:22,454
Are they still looking at us?
312
00:10:22,539 --> 00:10:24,914
Uh, let me check. Yeah.
313
00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:26,082
Do they look po'd?
314
00:10:26,209 --> 00:10:27,834
Pretty-pretty po'd.
315
00:10:27,919 --> 00:10:28,960
How about now?
316
00:10:29,046 --> 00:10:31,880
-Hmm. Look still pretty upset.
-Aw, man.
317
00:10:31,965 --> 00:10:33,173
Jimmy jr.:
Hey, cheer up. Let's go get you
318
00:10:33,342 --> 00:10:35,050
-A western omelet.
-Zeke: Okay.
319
00:10:35,135 --> 00:10:37,135
So the married sheriffs
got what they deserved.
320
00:10:37,262 --> 00:10:39,137
-The end. What a great story.
-I mean,
321
00:10:39,306 --> 00:10:41,014
-The structure's
a little all over the place...
-Linda: Up, bup, bup.
322
00:10:41,099 --> 00:10:43,475
That's not the end.
No, no, no. You know why?
323
00:10:43,518 --> 00:10:44,934
Gene:
Because nobody's kissed yet?
324
00:10:45,103 --> 00:10:47,103
Because the married sheriffs
didn't give up.
325
00:10:47,230 --> 00:10:49,356
They weren't gonna let
those punky townspeople win.
326
00:10:49,483 --> 00:10:51,316
Not that it was about
winning or losing.
327
00:10:51,401 --> 00:10:54,527
No, it was.
So, they started walking.
328
00:10:55,572 --> 00:10:56,946
And they kept on walking.
329
00:10:57,032 --> 00:10:59,199
And sure, there were
some piggy back rides.
330
00:10:59,284 --> 00:11:00,533
And then they switched.
331
00:11:00,661 --> 00:11:02,911
Uh, yup. And-and they,
332
00:11:02,996 --> 00:11:04,079
Uh, fought wolves.
333
00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:05,580
They danced with wolves,
334
00:11:05,666 --> 00:11:07,582
And they fought more wolves
because those wolves
335
00:11:07,751 --> 00:11:10,377
Didn't like the fact that they
danced with those other wolves.
336
00:11:10,504 --> 00:11:12,754
Anyway, it was all
to get back to the townspeople
337
00:11:12,839 --> 00:11:14,172
To help them
and watch over them.
338
00:11:14,257 --> 00:11:17,342
Oh, no, the townspeople
are having an amazing time
339
00:11:17,427 --> 00:11:19,552
And just totally
taking care of themselves.
340
00:11:19,638 --> 00:11:22,222
-♪ ♪
-(cheering)
341
00:11:22,349 --> 00:11:23,890
Yeah!
342
00:11:23,975 --> 00:11:26,226
Well, that's because they
didn't know what was coming.
343
00:11:26,353 --> 00:11:28,895
It was trouble.
Real bad trouble.
344
00:11:29,022 --> 00:11:30,230
The bad kind.
345
00:11:30,315 --> 00:11:32,190
You naughty little nincompoops.
346
00:11:32,275 --> 00:11:34,859
You couldn't just do what you
were told, could you?
347
00:11:34,986 --> 00:11:37,612
Big g is gonna
change this whole place.
348
00:11:37,698 --> 00:11:38,863
You could have been part of it.
349
00:11:38,949 --> 00:11:41,408
A wonderful, new,
civilized society.
350
00:11:41,493 --> 00:11:43,952
The well-mannered west,
she's gonna call it.
351
00:11:44,079 --> 00:11:45,704
And also,
I'm gonna get even richer,
352
00:11:45,789 --> 00:11:47,997
Which will be pretty cool.
353
00:11:48,083 --> 00:11:50,083
So, what's it gonna be?
You leave town
354
00:11:50,168 --> 00:11:52,544
Or my miner minions and I
355
00:11:52,629 --> 00:11:54,379
Fill you full of beans.
356
00:11:54,548 --> 00:11:55,630
In a bad way?
357
00:11:55,757 --> 00:11:57,215
In a very bad way.
358
00:11:57,300 --> 00:11:58,717
-Linda.
-What? Too harsh?
359
00:11:58,802 --> 00:11:59,843
It's a western.
360
00:11:59,970 --> 00:12:01,594
Don't you make me
scared of beans, woman!
361
00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:07,767
So, the townspeople--
who could have avoided all this
362
00:12:07,853 --> 00:12:09,561
By just listening
to the sheriffs
363
00:12:09,646 --> 00:12:10,854
And cleaning up the place,
364
00:12:10,939 --> 00:12:13,314
But no--
now they were staring down
365
00:12:13,442 --> 00:12:15,984
The bean blaster barrels
of mr. Goldoeder
366
00:12:16,111 --> 00:12:19,279
And his miner minions.
It was a standoff.
367
00:12:19,322 --> 00:12:21,322
They were so standoffish.
Sorry.
368
00:12:21,408 --> 00:12:23,283
Standoff music.
369
00:12:23,326 --> 00:12:26,077
♪ ♪
370
00:12:38,967 --> 00:12:39,841
(linda panting)
371
00:12:39,968 --> 00:12:40,759
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
372
00:12:40,844 --> 00:12:42,552
-Whoa!
-Stop, stop, stop.
373
00:12:42,679 --> 00:12:43,553
We're here to protect you.
374
00:12:43,680 --> 00:12:45,138
Who? Me? That's nice.
375
00:12:45,265 --> 00:12:46,931
-No, them.
-Oh, boo.
376
00:12:47,142 --> 00:12:48,600
Also, water would be great.
377
00:12:48,685 --> 00:12:50,435
Anyone have water?
378
00:12:50,562 --> 00:12:51,519
Uh, I-I'll ask later.
379
00:12:51,605 --> 00:12:52,228
Wait, wait, wait.
380
00:12:52,314 --> 00:12:53,188
Why should we trust you?
381
00:12:53,273 --> 00:12:54,647
-Because.
-Because why?
382
00:12:54,775 --> 00:12:57,150
Because we're the sheriffs
and it's our job to protect you.
383
00:12:57,235 --> 00:12:59,110
But how do we know you're
not just out for yourself,
384
00:12:59,196 --> 00:13:01,946
Working with goldoeder
to get your big payday
385
00:13:02,073 --> 00:13:03,072
By impressing big g?
386
00:13:03,158 --> 00:13:04,491
Okay, yeah, maybe we wanted
387
00:13:04,618 --> 00:13:07,076
To impress big g a little bit.
So sue us.
388
00:13:07,204 --> 00:13:08,578
Not that this town has a lawyer.
389
00:13:08,705 --> 00:13:10,163
-I'm a lawyer.
-Oh, you are?
390
00:13:10,248 --> 00:13:12,373
Yup. Personal injury, mostly.
391
00:13:12,542 --> 00:13:14,167
-Oh, uh, great.
-A little tax law.
392
00:13:14,294 --> 00:13:15,418
-Okay, yeah, I got it.
-Yup.
393
00:13:15,504 --> 00:13:17,003
Linda:
Anyway, what if doing chores
394
00:13:17,088 --> 00:13:18,421
Was actually good for you?
395
00:13:18,507 --> 00:13:20,882
Huh? Did you ever think
about that, you punks?
396
00:13:20,967 --> 00:13:22,050
That-that we love.
397
00:13:22,219 --> 00:13:24,636
Maybe making you do chores
is protecting you.
398
00:13:24,763 --> 00:13:26,429
From being delinquents. Ugh!
399
00:13:26,515 --> 00:13:29,224
-Why didn't you
just listen to us?
-Now!
400
00:13:30,185 --> 00:13:32,185
-Aah!
-Huh?
-Hey!
401
00:13:32,270 --> 00:13:34,646
See? That's what happens
when we listen to you--
402
00:13:34,773 --> 00:13:37,440
We get all distracted and
we get our bean blasters stolen.
403
00:13:37,526 --> 00:13:39,317
Damn it! Mine tied
my whole outfit together.
404
00:13:39,402 --> 00:13:41,528
Linda:
But then married
sheriff linda said...
405
00:13:41,655 --> 00:13:44,072
Well, you can't bean blast
all of us, goldoeder.
406
00:13:44,115 --> 00:13:46,366
For one thing,
it would be a big beany mess,
407
00:13:46,535 --> 00:13:48,493
And you know big g
doesn't like messes.
408
00:13:48,620 --> 00:13:49,702
That's true. Dang it.
409
00:13:49,830 --> 00:13:50,912
Louise:
But then he had an idea.
410
00:13:51,039 --> 00:13:53,039
I have an idea.
Let's have some fun.
411
00:13:53,166 --> 00:13:54,040
-Yay!
-Yay!
412
00:13:54,125 --> 00:13:55,625
Bearps? Married sheriffs?
413
00:13:55,710 --> 00:13:57,126
How about a quick draw contest?
414
00:13:57,212 --> 00:14:00,171
Each round is two people,
two beans. Best shot wins.
415
00:14:00,257 --> 00:14:01,714
And the winner
of the whole thing
416
00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:04,509
Gets to decide
who stays and who goes.
417
00:14:04,594 --> 00:14:06,052
Oh, and also, I'm entering
418
00:14:06,137 --> 00:14:07,929
And I'm an amazing shot.
419
00:14:08,056 --> 00:14:09,138
Pew!
420
00:14:09,266 --> 00:14:12,767
Yup, that's... The one
I was trying to hit.
421
00:14:12,853 --> 00:14:14,310
And I did.
422
00:14:14,396 --> 00:14:15,937
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
the sheriffs would not
423
00:14:16,064 --> 00:14:18,189
Get into a quick draw contest
with their own people.
424
00:14:18,275 --> 00:14:20,817
Also, louise,
this sounds a lot like
425
00:14:20,902 --> 00:14:22,443
The movie
the quick and the dead.
426
00:14:22,571 --> 00:14:24,487
Gene:
Which came first,
the movie or this story?
427
00:14:24,573 --> 00:14:26,155
Uh, the movie.
428
00:14:26,241 --> 00:14:27,240
So, is it like a rom-com, or...
429
00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:28,575
Have you seen that
movie, louise?
430
00:14:28,660 --> 00:14:30,910
Only, like, the parts
they showed on tv.
431
00:14:31,037 --> 00:14:32,704
While you were
asleep on the couch,
432
00:14:32,831 --> 00:14:34,372
When I watched the whole movie.
433
00:14:34,499 --> 00:14:35,748
Anyway, of course
the sheriffs would do it
434
00:14:35,876 --> 00:14:37,834
Because, deep down,
they knew it was the only way
435
00:14:37,961 --> 00:14:39,502
To prove who's boss
of this town.
436
00:14:39,546 --> 00:14:41,212
-No, I don't think so.
-She's right.
437
00:14:41,339 --> 00:14:42,797
-What?
-They got to do the bean blaster
438
00:14:42,924 --> 00:14:44,674
Competition thingy
to show who's boss.
439
00:14:44,801 --> 00:14:46,175
And sheriff bob
and sheriff linda
440
00:14:46,303 --> 00:14:47,093
Somehow both win, the end.
441
00:14:47,220 --> 00:14:48,553
Dut, ba, dut-dut-dut-dut!
442
00:14:48,680 --> 00:14:50,096
So, the contest began.
443
00:14:50,181 --> 00:14:53,224
First up, married sheriff bob
vs. Louise.
444
00:14:53,310 --> 00:14:55,518
And please enjoy my tiny hat.
445
00:14:55,604 --> 00:14:56,811
A baby gave it to me.
446
00:14:56,897 --> 00:14:59,689
Just kidding, I had it made.
By a baby.
447
00:15:02,569 --> 00:15:04,193
You're going down.
448
00:15:04,321 --> 00:15:06,571
Uh, can I go against
someone else?
449
00:15:06,698 --> 00:15:09,407
Maybe someone, uh,
less I-intimidating?
450
00:15:09,534 --> 00:15:10,408
Maybe the lawyer?
451
00:15:10,535 --> 00:15:11,826
-Hey.
-Nope.
452
00:15:11,912 --> 00:15:14,037
Okay, I-I just...
453
00:15:16,625 --> 00:15:17,749
My butt's out, isn't it?
454
00:15:17,834 --> 00:15:19,542
-It is.
-Disgusting!
455
00:15:19,628 --> 00:15:20,877
Well, that's not fair.
456
00:15:20,962 --> 00:15:23,004
Also, louise, why would
my butt flap be open?
457
00:15:23,173 --> 00:15:24,297
Wouldn't it be closed?
458
00:15:24,382 --> 00:15:26,090
Oh, they don't invent
closing butt flaps
459
00:15:26,176 --> 00:15:27,258
For another 50 years.
460
00:15:27,344 --> 00:15:28,551
Everybody, just listen.
461
00:15:28,678 --> 00:15:29,677
Mom, I didn't
get to the part
462
00:15:29,763 --> 00:15:30,887
Where you shoot gene's belt off
463
00:15:31,014 --> 00:15:32,931
-And his butt is hanging out.
-Nice.
464
00:15:33,016 --> 00:15:36,601
Why?! Why?! No!
465
00:15:36,686 --> 00:15:38,394
(weakly): Ashes to ashes.
466
00:15:38,521 --> 00:15:40,229
Butt to butt.
467
00:15:41,066 --> 00:15:42,106
Wait. Did I die?
468
00:15:42,233 --> 00:15:43,608
No, you were just
being dramatic.
469
00:15:43,693 --> 00:15:44,817
Got it. Continue.
470
00:15:44,903 --> 00:15:46,694
How did I do, louise?
Pretty good?
471
00:15:47,906 --> 00:15:49,155
Get ready for me to,
472
00:15:49,240 --> 00:15:50,949
Um, shoot you with...
473
00:15:51,076 --> 00:15:52,825
Oh, you won.
474
00:15:52,911 --> 00:15:53,743
So, not great.
475
00:15:53,828 --> 00:15:54,827
Louise:
Then it was time
476
00:15:54,955 --> 00:15:56,454
To find out who would face off
477
00:15:56,539 --> 00:15:57,789
With goldoeder
in the final round.
478
00:15:57,916 --> 00:15:59,082
And that's
when goldoeder decided
479
00:15:59,167 --> 00:16:00,708
To make it more interesting.
480
00:16:00,794 --> 00:16:02,210
Let's make it more interesting.
481
00:16:02,295 --> 00:16:03,544
Now that we're down
to the real-deal
482
00:16:03,630 --> 00:16:05,004
Head honchos around here,
483
00:16:05,131 --> 00:16:07,873
Why don't we switch to
the real-deal bean.
484
00:16:07,968 --> 00:16:09,217
Lima.
485
00:16:09,302 --> 00:16:10,134
(gasping)
486
00:16:10,261 --> 00:16:12,053
You can't be serious.
487
00:16:14,933 --> 00:16:16,808
But lima beans are huge.
And they hurt like hell.
488
00:16:16,893 --> 00:16:18,309
And they taste okay at best.
489
00:16:18,436 --> 00:16:20,728
I mean, if you sauté them
with a little butter...
490
00:16:20,814 --> 00:16:21,896
-Bob, shush.
-Dad, shh.
491
00:16:21,982 --> 00:16:23,606
-Sorry.
-And married sheriff linda said:
492
00:16:23,692 --> 00:16:26,526
I can't believe you're about
to blast me with a lima bean.
493
00:16:26,653 --> 00:16:27,735
Louise:
And louise said:
494
00:16:27,862 --> 00:16:29,278
I can't believe you're about to
495
00:16:29,406 --> 00:16:30,571
Blast me with a lima bean.
496
00:16:30,657 --> 00:16:33,241
Just do the frickin' chores.
497
00:16:33,368 --> 00:16:34,742
No frickin' way.
498
00:16:34,869 --> 00:16:38,538
Aah! Why can't you just do
something when I ask you to?
499
00:16:38,623 --> 00:16:41,541
I'm in charge and I know
what's best for you.
500
00:16:41,626 --> 00:16:43,501
It's like you don't
respect me at all,
501
00:16:43,628 --> 00:16:46,379
Even though everything I do,
I do it for you.
502
00:16:46,464 --> 00:16:47,880
Okay, bryan adams.
503
00:16:47,966 --> 00:16:49,257
Sorry. Not doing them.
504
00:16:49,342 --> 00:16:52,301
Ugh! It's so frustrating!
505
00:16:52,387 --> 00:16:54,012
(sniffs) you know what?
Forget it.
506
00:16:54,097 --> 00:16:56,431
Forget everything, I don't care.
I don't care what you do.
507
00:16:56,558 --> 00:16:57,807
(sniffs)
508
00:16:57,892 --> 00:17:01,477
Are you crying?
During a quick draw competition?
509
00:17:01,563 --> 00:17:02,937
No, I'm fine.
510
00:17:03,064 --> 00:17:06,190
Just, I'm in charge
and I'm fine. I'm fine.
511
00:17:06,276 --> 00:17:08,151
Uh-oh. Uh, hey, everyone,
512
00:17:08,236 --> 00:17:11,070
Uh, look at, uh,
pepperoni the pony.
513
00:17:11,156 --> 00:17:12,488
(clucks tongue)
514
00:17:12,574 --> 00:17:15,533
-So hot.
-It's not all about
you, pepperoni.
515
00:17:15,618 --> 00:17:16,993
(cries) it's not...
516
00:17:17,078 --> 00:17:20,038
Uh, do I... Win?
517
00:17:24,294 --> 00:17:25,501
Is mom okay? I'm only asking
518
00:17:25,587 --> 00:17:26,961
'cause she ran out
of the room crying.
519
00:17:27,130 --> 00:17:28,671
Maybe it's part of her
nightly beauty regimen
520
00:17:28,798 --> 00:17:30,214
That we just aren't aware of.
521
00:17:30,300 --> 00:17:31,340
If it works, it works.
522
00:17:31,426 --> 00:17:33,384
I'm gonna, uh, go talk to her.
523
00:17:33,470 --> 00:17:34,802
Or maybe I go?
524
00:17:34,929 --> 00:17:36,721
Oh. Uh, okay.
525
00:17:36,848 --> 00:17:40,433
So, anybody have
any fun weekend plans?
526
00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:41,684
-No.
-Okay.
527
00:17:41,853 --> 00:17:43,478
Uh, mom?
528
00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:45,772
Hi. I'm fine.
529
00:17:45,899 --> 00:17:47,148
I just needed to fart,
530
00:17:47,233 --> 00:17:49,150
So I ran out here to fart.
531
00:17:49,235 --> 00:17:51,069
And I'm-I'm not crying,
532
00:17:51,196 --> 00:17:53,863
Even though it's really cool
for moms to get angry
533
00:17:53,948 --> 00:17:55,823
And frustrated and cry
in front of their kids.
534
00:17:55,909 --> 00:17:58,493
I'm sorry I made you not cry.
535
00:17:58,578 --> 00:17:59,911
Now I feel like a jerk.
536
00:17:59,996 --> 00:18:01,579
I just... It's not easy
537
00:18:01,664 --> 00:18:02,914
Having someone bigger than you
538
00:18:02,999 --> 00:18:04,540
Telling you what to do
all the time.
539
00:18:04,667 --> 00:18:05,875
And then that thing at school,
540
00:18:05,960 --> 00:18:08,461
Labonz taking my beautiful
finger pop-pet.
541
00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:11,464
You, uh, you caught me
at a bad time.
542
00:18:11,549 --> 00:18:12,799
I know, I know.
543
00:18:12,967 --> 00:18:15,301
But I just had that
phone call with grandma
544
00:18:15,386 --> 00:18:17,428
And her whole chores spiel
got in my head.
545
00:18:17,514 --> 00:18:19,472
So let's call it
all grandma's fault.
546
00:18:19,557 --> 00:18:21,015
No, we love grandma.
547
00:18:21,101 --> 00:18:22,100
But, yes, sort of.
548
00:18:22,185 --> 00:18:23,559
Also, I mean, one of our chores
549
00:18:23,728 --> 00:18:25,186
Was to light grandpa's cigars.
550
00:18:25,271 --> 00:18:27,063
Like, in our mouths, so...
551
00:18:27,190 --> 00:18:28,397
I can still taste it.
552
00:18:28,525 --> 00:18:30,066
So, maybe she's not
mother of the year.
553
00:18:30,193 --> 00:18:31,234
Well, now she sounds great.
554
00:18:31,319 --> 00:18:32,735
It's just, you know...
555
00:18:32,862 --> 00:18:34,403
It's been so much pressure
556
00:18:34,531 --> 00:18:37,073
Trying to raise good kids.
Good humans.
557
00:18:37,158 --> 00:18:39,534
It can mess you up.
And then I get mad at you guys,
558
00:18:39,661 --> 00:18:41,035
But you're just being kids.
559
00:18:41,121 --> 00:18:42,578
It's-it's just... (sniffs)
560
00:18:42,705 --> 00:18:43,913
You know, it's just a lot.
561
00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:46,290
Mostly 'cause of tina, right?
And gene?
562
00:18:46,417 --> 00:18:47,458
Come here, you.
563
00:18:47,544 --> 00:18:49,877
You know, I'm glad
you're so spunky.
564
00:18:50,004 --> 00:18:51,379
It'll be good for you
when you're older.
565
00:18:51,464 --> 00:18:53,464
Nobody's gonna
push my louise around.
566
00:18:53,591 --> 00:18:55,842
You'll be the toughest little
cutie in prison. (grunts)
567
00:18:55,969 --> 00:18:57,009
-Thanks, mom.
-And I'm still gonna try
568
00:18:57,095 --> 00:18:58,719
-To make you do chores.
-Mmm, never.
569
00:18:58,847 --> 00:19:00,346
-What if I give you candy?
-Deal.
570
00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:02,098
Maybe some of those
finger blasters?
571
00:19:02,142 --> 00:19:03,057
Finger pop-pets.
572
00:19:03,184 --> 00:19:04,642
The candy thing was my idea.
573
00:19:04,727 --> 00:19:05,977
I'd clean the crap out
of this place for some candy.
574
00:19:06,062 --> 00:19:08,062
As usual, candy
solves everything.
575
00:19:08,106 --> 00:19:09,313
Now can we go back
to mom and dad's bed
576
00:19:09,440 --> 00:19:11,357
And finish the story?
I need to know
577
00:19:11,442 --> 00:19:12,984
What happens to that
intriguing piano player.
578
00:19:13,069 --> 00:19:14,944
Does he ever play coachella?
579
00:19:15,029 --> 00:19:16,696
Oh, hurry it up already.
580
00:19:16,781 --> 00:19:17,905
I need to go home
and wash these miners
581
00:19:17,991 --> 00:19:20,992
Before tomorrow.
They're filthy.
582
00:19:23,371 --> 00:19:24,370
What the...
583
00:19:24,455 --> 00:19:26,497
Yeah, we're on
the same side now.
584
00:19:26,583 --> 00:19:27,623
Yeah, deal with it.
585
00:19:27,709 --> 00:19:28,916
-Yay!
-Same sidesies!
586
00:19:29,085 --> 00:19:30,960
Oh, whatever.
I'll just bean you both.
587
00:19:31,045 --> 00:19:32,837
Could you stand just
next to each other?
588
00:19:32,922 --> 00:19:34,463
And-and also stand closer to me?
589
00:19:34,549 --> 00:19:35,798
What is going on?
590
00:19:35,967 --> 00:19:38,217
Oh, big g.
When did you get here?
591
00:19:38,303 --> 00:19:39,260
Just now.
592
00:19:39,345 --> 00:19:41,220
I took a coach
from the train station.
593
00:19:41,306 --> 00:19:44,182
The driver was
very rough with my bags,
594
00:19:44,267 --> 00:19:46,767
And his horses
were way too loud.
595
00:19:46,853 --> 00:19:48,853
Oh, sorry to hear that.
596
00:19:48,938 --> 00:19:50,354
Well, everything's fine, big g.
597
00:19:50,440 --> 00:19:53,608
Just gonna get rid of all these
naughty townspeople real quick
598
00:19:53,693 --> 00:19:54,817
And then I can take you
599
00:19:54,944 --> 00:19:57,153
On a fun tour.
Fyi, the married sheriffs
600
00:19:57,280 --> 00:19:58,487
Are not cool anymore.
601
00:19:58,573 --> 00:20:02,491
Ech. Is nobody doing
any chores around here?
602
00:20:02,577 --> 00:20:03,993
I do not approve.
603
00:20:04,162 --> 00:20:07,413
Well, guess what? That's fine.
You don't have to approve of it.
604
00:20:07,498 --> 00:20:09,540
Louise:
Yeah. Agree to disapprove.
605
00:20:09,626 --> 00:20:12,043
This is our town.
These are our people.
606
00:20:12,128 --> 00:20:14,462
And that tart, onion-y odor
is our smell.
607
00:20:14,589 --> 00:20:16,631
And sure, us sheriffs
may not always do
608
00:20:16,758 --> 00:20:19,592
What we're supposed to do,
but we do what we need to do.
609
00:20:19,677 --> 00:20:20,801
For the good of this town.
610
00:20:20,929 --> 00:20:22,345
And I'm gonna
be a better sheriff
611
00:20:22,430 --> 00:20:23,846
If I listen to my gut,
612
00:20:23,890 --> 00:20:26,724
And not someone else's gut
who doesn't even live here.
613
00:20:26,851 --> 00:20:29,852
And right now,
my gut is telling me
614
00:20:29,938 --> 00:20:31,604
Back off, big g.
615
00:20:32,357 --> 00:20:33,147
Aah!
616
00:20:33,233 --> 00:20:34,398
Bob: Wait, there's a canon?
617
00:20:34,567 --> 00:20:36,067
And I ride it, somehow?
618
00:20:36,152 --> 00:20:37,360
Linda: Yeah, a bean canon.
619
00:20:37,487 --> 00:20:38,903
Bob:
And it's rolling on its own?
620
00:20:39,030 --> 00:20:40,404
Linda:
Well, that's how some canons
621
00:20:40,531 --> 00:20:41,906
Worked back then,
I'm pretty sure.
622
00:20:41,991 --> 00:20:42,907
Psst, hey.
623
00:20:42,992 --> 00:20:43,908
Should we move them?
624
00:20:43,993 --> 00:20:45,451
No, they look so sweet.
625
00:20:45,578 --> 00:20:46,786
We can all fit, right?
626
00:20:46,913 --> 00:20:49,288
Yep. Half my body
is probably fine just floating.
627
00:20:49,374 --> 00:20:52,166
(yawning):
Wait, you forgot something.
628
00:20:52,252 --> 00:20:54,126
-Yeah.
-Oh, right.
629
00:20:56,172 --> 00:20:58,464
This is some good pepperoni.
630
00:20:59,467 --> 00:21:02,134
♪ ah, pepperoni
roamin' the plains ♪
631
00:21:02,262 --> 00:21:05,680
♪ yes, sir,
he's one handsome pony ♪
632
00:21:05,765 --> 00:21:07,306
♪ one handsome pony ♪
633
00:21:07,392 --> 00:21:09,934
♪ looks like
he found some pepperoni ♪
634
00:21:10,061 --> 00:21:12,395
♪ he's super buff
and super humble ♪
635
00:21:12,522 --> 00:21:16,148
♪ the only thing hotter than
his muscles are his morals ♪
636
00:21:16,276 --> 00:21:17,733
♪ he's got hard morals ♪
637
00:21:17,819 --> 00:21:20,778
♪ go on and look at him
flexing his pectorals ♪
638
00:21:20,863 --> 00:21:24,282
-♪ ah, come on, pepperoni ♪
-♪ no sliced ham ♪
639
00:21:24,409 --> 00:21:27,785
-♪ or baloney ♪
-♪ don't want no ham
or more baloney ♪
640
00:21:27,912 --> 00:21:30,413
♪ sure hope he finds
more pepperoni. ♪
641
00:21:30,498 --> 00:21:32,581
Captioning sponsored by
bento box entertainment
642
00:21:32,667 --> 00:21:35,084
And toyota.