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♪ ♪
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-TINA: Uh...
-LOUISE: What's she doing?
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Is she waiting on them?
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That's not
what's happening, right?
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-Oh, I can't look.
-TINA: Sorry.
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-Oof. That doesn't look good.
-Nope.
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TINA: I've got to make
a nine inch nail.
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-Oh, my God.
-(phone buzzes)
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-Tina?
-TINA: I've got to get
out of here!
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I messed everything up.
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And I ran into the bathroom,
and now
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I don't know how to leave
without
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walking right by their table!
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It's okay, honey.
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-It's okay.
-Start the car!
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-I'm gonna make a run for it!
-Tina, no!
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TINA:
Ah, ah, ah!
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LINDA:
Tina, honey! What happened?
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Tina!
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TINA:
They came in again yesterday.
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They sat in the same booth.
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I've never seen teenagers
like this before.
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They're a different,
confident cool.
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I call it: confi-cool.
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They smelled
like they always smell,
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like that spray-on hair dye
I thought people
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were only allowed
to use on Halloween.
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I couldn't stop staring.
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I hope I wasn't too obvious.
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I wanted to talk to them.
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I wanted to eat them?
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But with my heart?
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Like how I felt
when I saw that bus stop ad
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where the four friends
were jumping off a dock
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into a lake wearing jeans.
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Please, please, please,
let them come back, Journal.
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I need to--
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Oh, crap. My pen's dying.
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Sorry, Journal,
this might hurt a little bit.
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I need to figure out
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how they are so cool,
and then be that cool.
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Hmm. So, there's me.
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LINDA:
Kids! Breakfast is ready.
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Okay. I got to go.
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Hey. We said the same thing.
Jinx.
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Morning, my Tina.
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-Morning.
-Morning, my Louise.
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-You sleep okay?
-No, Mother. I did not.
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-I was tossing and turning
all night.
-Oh, no.
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And then, early this morning,
it struck me.
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It was an odor.
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Like if a dumpster
just got back from the gym.
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I searched my room, frantic,
and there they were,
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under my desk: Gene's stinky,
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nasty, abominable socks.
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-Oh, God. Not at breakfast!
-Ugh.
-(Tina retches)
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Mm-hmm. Gene, take them.
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Thank you.
Oh, they're still moist.
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He took them off yesterday
when we were playing
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-No Floor Parkour.
-GENE: I needed the grippy-ness
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of my sweet, clammy feet.
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LOUISE: And I said, "Get those
satanic socks out of my room."
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And he said, "I will,
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right after
I parkour some more."
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But then he forgot.
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-That sounds right.
-BOB: Ugh.
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Louise, why didn't you
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just throw them in the hamper?
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Or in the garbage?
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Because, Father,
I wanted him to feel shame.
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I think they smell fun
and interesting.
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Oh, really?
So you feel no shame?
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The opposite. I feel pride.
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I could smell these socks
all day.
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Fine, then do it.
Wear them again.
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That sounds like a bad idea.
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-Okay.
-Gene.
-Oh, no, no, no.
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Not on your feet.
That's too far from your nose.
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Well, I can't wear them
on my hands.
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What if someone asks me
to do a spontaneous piano solo?
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Wear them in... this area.
Near the smell zone.
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Or your dad had that fun idea
to throw them in the hamper.
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How about right here?
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I could use
some necktie accessorizing.
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I'm dressing for sock-cess.
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Gene, please don't.
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Father, this is something
I have to do.
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-Is it?
-Yes.
-Yes.
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I'm gonna go wash my hands
for a very long time.
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You won't last a day!
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Oh, yes, I will.
And I'll look great doing it.
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Papa? Would you help me tie my
sweaty sock into a Windsor knot?
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I don't know how to do that,
and I don't want to touch it.
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-Fair enough.
-Earth to Teeny Tina.
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-Have some breakfast.
-Oh.
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I was just thinking
about those kids
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that have been coming into
the restaurant lately.
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You mean me, you and Louise?
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No, the ones with the hair
and the clothes and the swagger.
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-Talking about me?
-BOB/LINDA: The teens.
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Ugh, again with the teens.
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If you want swagger,
check this out.
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(grunting rhythmically)
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(sighs) I think something
dripped onto your plate
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-from those things.
-Oh, look at that.
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Tina, honey, your face might be
smudging the glass a little bit.
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Maybe if you mop a little worse,
they'll come sooner?
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-You could also mop
anywhere else?
-No, thank you.
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Okay, Gene.
You've made your point.
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You can take the tie off now.
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Mm-mm. Today was great
because of this tie.
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I turned a lot of heads. And
I cleared the cafeteria line.
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All I had to do was jiggle
it about. My tie, that is.
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Nuh-uh. There's no way
that wearing that smelly sock
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as a necktie was a good thing.
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It's fine, Louise.
You wouldn't get it.
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You're living that
no-sock-necktie life.
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Probably 'cause you're not
strong enough. And that's okay.
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Oh, I'm strong enough. I'm just
not quite as dumb as you.
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But if I chose to wear a sock
necktie, I'd be great at it.
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I'd be better at it than you.
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Your mouth is writing checks
your nose can't cash.
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(scoffs) My nose
can write checks all day.
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It's got overdraft protection.
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Well, mine reimburses you
for out-of-network ATM fees!
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They're here! Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
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Here.
Give me the mop so you can...
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This mop is dry.
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There's nothing even
in the bucket.
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-Sorry, yeah.
It was just my cover.
-Okay.
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Well, go give them their menus.
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-Huh. Huh. Huh. Huh. Huh.
-Or maybe I'll do the menus.
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-Huh. Huh.
-Tina, when you take
their order, you should scream,
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"Love me!" right in their faces.
People like that.
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I can't take their order.
They're them.
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And I'm just regular.
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No, you're not.
You're irregular.
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Like Dad's heartbeat.
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It's not irregular.
It's just funky.
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You can do it, Tina.
You're a waitress.
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Sort of. So, just wait on them?
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-You want me to take
their order, honey?
-No.
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-I'll do it. (groaning)
-Attagirl.
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So far, so good.
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(groaning continues)
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Hey.
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Hi, I'm Tina?
Can I take your order? (choking)
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Sorry. (gagging)
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I'm just ch--
I'm choking on my spit.
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(coughs) You can start ordering.
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I can write and choke.
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She's doing great.
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Maybe she wanted it
to be like this?
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You know,
where she gags on them?
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Maybe it sounds worse
from here, somehow?
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Okay, got it.
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Um, I'll just get this
into the, um, the-the kitchen?
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So that they can
make food for you.
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Um, and that's how it's
done here. (chuckles nervously)
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Thanks. So what time should we
get to the Odeon next Saturday?
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-O-Ow.
-Well, the Mud Stains go on
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at 8:00. And I want to
be doing this by 8:05.
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-So, 7:00?
-TINA: The Mud Stains
at the Odeon?
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Must be a band they like.
Writing it down.
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I'm gonna stand here and listen
a little while longer.
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Look casual. (strains)
That's it. Good job.
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Keeping it casual.
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-Here you go.
-Thanks.
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"The Mud Stains," question mark.
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"Cool band," question mark.
Question mark.
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Sorry, that's for me.
Um, here you go.
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This one says, "Don't fart,
don't fart, don't fart."
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Tina, did you even
take their order?
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Sorry. Let me find it.
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Um, here you--
No. Nope. Not that one.
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Um, how about-- nope.
No. Um, oh! Okay, here it is.
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Lot of exclamation points.
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Yeah, it was
a really good order.
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I'll-I'll need it back later.
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Ah, look who went to the hamper
and found exciting neckwear,
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who can totally handle it,
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because she's stronger than
anyone else in this family.
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Oh, no.
You're both doing this now?
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Ooh, one of my socks from today.
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Fresh off my feet.
It will be especially pungent.
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We had P.E.,
and I stepped in a puddle.
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-Mm.
-Yeah, I'm getting that.
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All right. Family togetherness
time with the TV.
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Oh, Louise. Oh, no, honey.
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-Oh, yes.
-Hey, where's Tina?
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Tina! TV!
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TINA:
I'm gonna stay in my room.
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00:06:50,152 --> 00:06:51,134
You guys can watch TV
without me.
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00:06:51,227 --> 00:06:53,803
Nerd! Just kidding. Sorta.
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00:06:53,822 --> 00:06:55,747
TINA:
Journal, I have a plan.
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00:06:55,899 --> 00:06:57,416
The teens, they're the key.
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00:06:57,567 --> 00:06:59,643
The key to a better me,
a better life.
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00:06:59,736 --> 00:07:01,253
The next time they come
to the restaurant,
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00:07:01,404 --> 00:07:02,996
they're gonna meet
a whole new Tina.
200
00:07:03,090 --> 00:07:04,981
And it's gonna be me
being a lot like them.
201
00:07:05,074 --> 00:07:06,816
Step one,
like the music they like.
202
00:07:06,835 --> 00:07:09,076
Step two,
dress the way they dress.
203
00:07:09,171 --> 00:07:10,745
Step three, we become friends,
204
00:07:10,764 --> 00:07:12,580
and everything's different
in my life, forever.
205
00:07:12,599 --> 00:07:14,933
Step one. Time to fall in love
with this band,
206
00:07:15,084 --> 00:07:17,585
that is now my favorite band,
that I'd never heard before.
207
00:07:17,604 --> 00:07:19,512
-(punk rock music playing)
-Okay, okay.
208
00:07:19,665 --> 00:07:20,939
That's a little shouty.
209
00:07:21,090 --> 00:07:22,774
Ah, I-I love it.
210
00:07:22,926 --> 00:07:26,169
Just gonna turn it down a little
bit. Because I love it so much.
211
00:07:26,262 --> 00:07:28,262
Yay. The plan's already working.
212
00:07:28,356 --> 00:07:31,616
This is the new me. Just gonna
turn it down a little bit more.
213
00:07:35,013 --> 00:07:36,288
Okay, we're off
to the thrift store
214
00:07:36,439 --> 00:07:38,290
to get Tina a funky old outfit.
215
00:07:38,441 --> 00:07:39,365
Yep, step two of
216
00:07:39,518 --> 00:07:41,460
my "Tina Becomes
A Cool Teen-a" plan.
217
00:07:41,628 --> 00:07:43,703
Step one was a huge success,
and I totally love
218
00:07:43,855 --> 00:07:46,189
how scary and angry
all the Mud Stains songs are.
219
00:07:46,208 --> 00:07:48,041
♪ Here's a riddle ♪
220
00:07:48,135 --> 00:07:50,802
♪ It's my middle finger ♪
221
00:07:51,029 --> 00:07:53,196
♪ Pointed in your direction ♪
222
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♪ I hope you get an infection. ♪
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00:07:55,701 --> 00:07:56,975
-LOUISE: Sounds great.
-GENE: That's deep.
224
00:07:57,126 --> 00:07:58,977
-Such a good song.
-Yeah.
225
00:07:59,128 --> 00:08:01,646
Oh, and, Dad, if the teens
come in before I get back,
226
00:08:01,798 --> 00:08:02,981
text Mom and try to stall them.
227
00:08:03,132 --> 00:08:05,375
-Uh...
-Just talk to them about emojis
228
00:08:05,393 --> 00:08:07,043
and new drugs
you've heard about.
229
00:08:07,136 --> 00:08:08,712
-Bye.
-Bye.
-Have fun shopping
230
00:08:08,805 --> 00:08:10,021
while we stay at work.
231
00:08:10,173 --> 00:08:11,564
-Not bothered by this at all.
-Good luck.
232
00:08:11,717 --> 00:08:13,399
Don't pierce anything
I wouldn't pierce!
233
00:08:13,552 --> 00:08:15,160
Have I told you all the things
I wouldn't pierce?
234
00:08:15,311 --> 00:08:16,903
Basically,
everything but my ween.
235
00:08:17,055 --> 00:08:19,313
TINA:
Whoa. There's so much stuff.
236
00:08:19,407 --> 00:08:21,333
Maybe they have, like,
a badass teen section?
237
00:08:21,484 --> 00:08:23,168
Probably not.
I'm trying to remember
238
00:08:23,395 --> 00:08:24,577
what those kids were wearing.
239
00:08:24,730 --> 00:08:26,654
I just remember I wanted
to brush all their hair.
240
00:08:26,673 --> 00:08:29,249
Okay, let's start trying on
stuff other people threw away.
241
00:08:29,401 --> 00:08:32,085
♪ Here's a riddle ♪
242
00:08:32,237 --> 00:08:34,679
♪ It's my middle finger ♪
243
00:08:34,831 --> 00:08:36,923
♪ Pointed in your direction ♪
244
00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:40,334
♪ I hope you get an infection ♪
245
00:08:40,428 --> 00:08:43,188
♪ And upon further reflection ♪
246
00:08:43,339 --> 00:08:46,007
♪ I wanna punch you
in the face. ♪
247
00:08:46,101 --> 00:08:47,917
Hey, Bob. Kids.
248
00:08:47,936 --> 00:08:49,343
-KIDS: Hey, Teddy.
-Hey, Teddy.
249
00:08:49,363 --> 00:08:51,029
Still wearing socks
as a necktie, huh?
250
00:08:51,180 --> 00:08:52,364
Double sock necktie.
251
00:08:52,515 --> 00:08:54,591
Yeah, it's double the struggle.
For Gene.
252
00:08:54,684 --> 00:08:56,183
I don't really get it.
253
00:08:56,203 --> 00:08:57,536
I guess it's different
for every generation.
254
00:08:57,687 --> 00:08:59,763
With mine, it was talking back
to authority figures.
255
00:08:59,856 --> 00:09:01,948
With yours, it's dirty socks
around your neck.
256
00:09:02,042 --> 00:09:03,283
Yeah, they get like this.
257
00:09:03,435 --> 00:09:05,210
Were you here
when they decided to see
258
00:09:05,361 --> 00:09:07,028
who could hold their pee
the longest?
259
00:09:07,105 --> 00:09:08,104
Th-That didn't end well.
260
00:09:08,106 --> 00:09:09,047
Oh, yeah, that was bad.
261
00:09:09,198 --> 00:09:10,715
Kids, go take out the garbage.
262
00:09:10,867 --> 00:09:12,700
Uh, take your time.
Or, you know,
263
00:09:12,719 --> 00:09:14,944
stop wearing nasty,
dirty clothes around your neck.
264
00:09:14,963 --> 00:09:16,871
Louise can stop
any time she wants.
265
00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:19,465
-I'll stop after you stop.
-I'll stop after you stop.
266
00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:21,208
Well, I guess you're never
stopping, 'cause I love it.
267
00:09:21,303 --> 00:09:24,712
Not as much as I love it.
This is my spiritual practice.
268
00:09:24,790 --> 00:09:25,972
I'm teaching a class on this,
269
00:09:26,066 --> 00:09:28,049
and it's already full
for the next ten years.
270
00:09:28,143 --> 00:09:29,475
Do you need a guest speaker?
271
00:09:29,628 --> 00:09:31,311
-We're doing our best.
-(doorbell jingles)
272
00:09:31,463 --> 00:09:32,962
We're back, and we got slacks!
273
00:09:33,056 --> 00:09:34,221
-Ah, ah, ah.
-And some other stuff, too.
274
00:09:34,316 --> 00:09:35,389
-Did they come in?
-No.
275
00:09:35,409 --> 00:09:37,224
-Phew.
-Wow, look at those boots.
276
00:09:37,244 --> 00:09:38,484
TEDDY:
Whoa. Combat boots.
277
00:09:38,637 --> 00:09:40,745
Are you storming
the beaches of Normandy later?
278
00:09:40,972 --> 00:09:41,971
Just kidding. I know you're not.
279
00:09:42,065 --> 00:09:43,248
Are those your size?
280
00:09:43,399 --> 00:09:45,417
They're someone's size.
Ah! Oops.
281
00:09:45,644 --> 00:09:48,086
I'm gonna run upstairs and
change and then come back down.
282
00:09:48,237 --> 00:09:49,646
If they come while I'm gone,
just, uh,
283
00:09:49,664 --> 00:09:51,072
take a really long time
to make their food.
284
00:09:51,166 --> 00:09:53,483
Feels like that's happening
right now for me.
285
00:09:53,576 --> 00:09:54,984
-Hint, hint.
-Mm.
286
00:09:55,078 --> 00:09:56,336
♪ I hate ♪
287
00:09:56,430 --> 00:09:58,079
♪ Waiting for crap to happen ♪
288
00:09:58,098 --> 00:10:00,098
♪ I hate ♪
289
00:10:00,325 --> 00:10:02,008
♪ Waiting for crap to happen ♪
290
00:10:02,160 --> 00:10:04,177
♪ Don't make me wait
like you're the bus ♪
291
00:10:04,329 --> 00:10:06,162
♪ If something doesn't happen
soon, I'm gonna cuss ♪
292
00:10:06,255 --> 00:10:08,273
♪ Oh, my God, seriously,
if waiting's like dying ♪
293
00:10:08,424 --> 00:10:09,849
♪ Then you're killing me ♪
294
00:10:10,001 --> 00:10:11,926
♪ I hate waiting
for crap to happen ♪
295
00:10:12,020 --> 00:10:16,531
♪ I hate waiting for crap
to happen ♪
296
00:10:17,451 --> 00:10:18,617
♪ Crap! ♪
297
00:10:18,768 --> 00:10:20,510
TINA: Gosh darn it,
I did all the stuff.
298
00:10:20,528 --> 00:10:23,437
The music, the clothes,
and they didn't come in.
299
00:10:23,457 --> 00:10:24,848
What if I never see them again?
300
00:10:24,866 --> 00:10:26,366
And they never see new cool me?
301
00:10:26,460 --> 00:10:28,034
How will I even know
if any of the stuff
302
00:10:28,111 --> 00:10:29,185
I've been doing is working?
303
00:10:29,204 --> 00:10:30,629
Ah! I have to do something.
304
00:10:30,780 --> 00:10:32,188
Ugh, I have to find them!
305
00:10:32,207 --> 00:10:33,189
But how do I...
306
00:10:33,208 --> 00:10:34,524
(sighs) Forget it.
307
00:10:34,617 --> 00:10:37,093
They're gone.
Out of my life forever.
308
00:10:38,454 --> 00:10:39,638
The concert!
309
00:10:39,865 --> 00:10:42,031
I have to go to the
Mud Stains concert at the Odeon!
310
00:10:42,125 --> 00:10:43,141
Tonight. Right now!
311
00:10:43,292 --> 00:10:44,550
Um, okay, what's happening?
312
00:10:44,645 --> 00:10:47,053
The confi-cool teens.
They didn't come back,
313
00:10:47,147 --> 00:10:48,388
and they may never come back,
314
00:10:48,464 --> 00:10:50,223
and it's the one place
I know they're gonna be.
315
00:10:50,375 --> 00:10:51,799
At the Odeon. Tonight.
316
00:10:51,893 --> 00:10:53,801
I got to go there. Or-or they'll
slip through my fingers forever.
317
00:10:53,895 --> 00:10:55,211
-LOUISE: Like Dad's hair.
-Louise.
318
00:10:55,230 --> 00:10:56,546
Can I go? Please?
319
00:10:56,564 --> 00:10:57,897
It's all ages,
320
00:10:58,049 --> 00:10:59,382
which I think means
babies will be there?
321
00:10:59,475 --> 00:11:00,808
A-And it's happening right now!
322
00:11:00,902 --> 00:11:03,403
And-and I'll spend my own money,
but it's 3.2 miles away,
323
00:11:03,555 --> 00:11:05,738
so I need a ride! Please?
I'll clean the whole house!
324
00:11:05,891 --> 00:11:07,165
-I-I'll do laundry!
-No need.
325
00:11:07,392 --> 00:11:11,819
Uh, yeah, sure, okay.
Uh, right, Bob?
326
00:11:11,838 --> 00:11:13,004
Uh, yeah.
327
00:11:13,231 --> 00:11:14,172
Maybe I'll go with you.
328
00:11:14,341 --> 00:11:16,065
Yay! My first hard rock concert.
329
00:11:16,084 --> 00:11:19,085
I want to stage dive.
Ooh, no, stage cannonball.
330
00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:20,753
Um, it could go pretty late.
331
00:11:20,847 --> 00:11:22,405
I mean,
it's already kind of late.
332
00:11:22,424 --> 00:11:23,848
Maybe just your mom
and Tina should go.
333
00:11:24,075 --> 00:11:25,666
But we'll drop
you guys off and...
334
00:11:25,760 --> 00:11:27,427
Get gelato from that place.
335
00:11:27,579 --> 00:11:29,521
Ooh, gelato.
I'd rather stage dive that.
336
00:11:29,672 --> 00:11:32,432
Uh, okay. That's kind of close
to the Odeon.
337
00:11:32,526 --> 00:11:34,267
Okay, great.
Mom, you gonna wear that?
338
00:11:34,343 --> 00:11:35,935
I mean, it's-it's fine.
It's fine!
339
00:11:36,029 --> 00:11:38,087
LINDA:
Okay, we're here.
340
00:11:38,106 --> 00:11:40,256
-Bye.
-We'll see you crazy kids
in a little bit,
341
00:11:40,349 --> 00:11:41,682
unless we get moshed to death.
342
00:11:41,851 --> 00:11:43,109
Just kidding. Oh, God.
It's fine.
343
00:11:43,261 --> 00:11:44,277
Bye, Tina. Oh, look!
344
00:11:44,371 --> 00:11:46,279
Sock tie is waving to you, too.
345
00:11:46,431 --> 00:11:48,448
Goodbye. Pshew, pshew, pshew!
346
00:11:48,542 --> 00:11:51,100
Oh, so is mine.
Wafty, wafty, wafty.
347
00:11:51,235 --> 00:11:52,785
-Pshew, pshew, pshew!
-Wafty, wafty, wafty!
348
00:11:52,938 --> 00:11:54,713
-Pshew, pshew, pshew, pshew...
-Wafty, wafty, wafty, wafty...
349
00:11:54,864 --> 00:11:56,214
Wait, Lin, now I want to switch.
350
00:11:56,365 --> 00:11:57,698
-LINDA: Too late. Goodbye.
-BOB: Hmm.
351
00:11:57,718 --> 00:12:00,719
Hi, um, two tickets
to the Mud Stains, please.
352
00:12:00,870 --> 00:12:02,703
One cool young adult and one...
353
00:12:02,723 --> 00:12:04,113
Mom, are you a senior yet?
354
00:12:04,282 --> 00:12:05,539
No. Thank you, Tina.
355
00:12:05,559 --> 00:12:06,616
Sorry, it's sold out.
356
00:12:06,634 --> 00:12:07,875
What? Sold out?
357
00:12:07,894 --> 00:12:09,210
No! How?
358
00:12:09,229 --> 00:12:10,470
I mean, you're a little late.
359
00:12:10,564 --> 00:12:12,397
They started playing
like a half an hour ago.
360
00:12:12,474 --> 00:12:14,123
And the opening band
even went long:
361
00:12:14,217 --> 00:12:15,508
-Your Mom's a Fart.
-Hey.
362
00:12:15,660 --> 00:12:17,627
-Uh, that's the name
of the opening band.
-Oh.
363
00:12:17,645 --> 00:12:19,070
But, also, concerts
364
00:12:19,297 --> 00:12:20,721
-sell out sometimes.
-Oh.
365
00:12:20,815 --> 00:12:24,075
Oh, no. Hey, uh, wh-what if,
uh, th-there's an extra
366
00:12:24,227 --> 00:12:26,244
four dollars in it for you?
367
00:12:26,395 --> 00:12:29,138
And, uh, some mints?
And a maxi pad?
368
00:12:29,232 --> 00:12:30,564
Nah. I can get free ones here.
369
00:12:30,584 --> 00:12:33,626
-No! No, no, no, no, no!
-LINDA: It's-it's got wings!
370
00:12:38,166 --> 00:12:39,832
I don't care what anybody says.
Gelato is good.
371
00:12:39,926 --> 00:12:42,076
I would fight someone
that said gelato wasn't good.
372
00:12:42,245 --> 00:12:45,338
I would, at the very least,
shake my head and go "mm-mm-mm."
373
00:12:45,432 --> 00:12:47,840
BOB:
Okay, well, now that
we've given you a ton of sugar,
374
00:12:48,009 --> 00:12:51,752
let's get you to bed. Tina,
did the gelato help you at all?
375
00:12:51,772 --> 00:12:52,937
(sighs)
376
00:12:53,164 --> 00:12:54,272
Tina said I should eat hers.
377
00:12:54,349 --> 00:12:55,923
She said it would
make her feel better.
378
00:12:56,017 --> 00:12:57,517
I think she wanted us
to split it.
379
00:12:57,611 --> 00:12:58,926
Is it full of tears?
380
00:12:58,945 --> 00:13:01,671
It is tear infused, I think.
Sorry, Tina.
381
00:13:01,689 --> 00:13:04,173
-Ah! It's them! It's them!
-LINDA: Oh, my God!
382
00:13:04,192 --> 00:13:05,675
-Oh, my God.
-The concert must be over.
383
00:13:05,768 --> 00:13:08,011
-Dad, follow those teens.
-LINDA: Follow those teens, Bob!
384
00:13:08,029 --> 00:13:10,455
Okay, but the light
is still red.
385
00:13:10,682 --> 00:13:12,940
I'm riding a gelato high.
I'm up for anything.
386
00:13:13,034 --> 00:13:16,702
Yeah. And I'm so jacked up on
sock smell, I feel invincible.
387
00:13:16,797 --> 00:13:17,778
Green light, Dad. Go!
388
00:13:17,798 --> 00:13:18,963
GENE:
Go, go, go, Dad.
389
00:13:19,115 --> 00:13:20,298
TINA:
But can you follow them better?
390
00:13:20,449 --> 00:13:21,357
LINDA:
Yeah. Come on, Bob.
391
00:13:21,376 --> 00:13:22,542
BOB:
Okay, I'm trying.
392
00:13:22,636 --> 00:13:24,618
It's hard to follow people
who are walking
393
00:13:24,638 --> 00:13:26,787
-when you're in a car.
-There. They went in there.
394
00:13:26,881 --> 00:13:29,456
-Park, Dad, park.
-Park, Bob!
-Why aren't you parking?
395
00:13:29,551 --> 00:13:31,142
BOB:
It's a lot of different
driving instructions.
396
00:13:31,369 --> 00:13:32,977
-LOUISE: Are we parked yet?
-TINA: I love you, Dad,
397
00:13:33,204 --> 00:13:34,795
-but what are you doing?
-BOB: Hold on, hold on.
398
00:13:34,964 --> 00:13:36,372
I-I-I'm-- (sighs)
I angled wrong.
399
00:13:36,465 --> 00:13:39,150
I nosed in,
but I can, I can save it.
400
00:13:39,227 --> 00:13:41,653
Let me just back up a tiny bit,
and then pull in some more.
401
00:13:41,880 --> 00:13:43,046
Bob, why didn't you
just back in?
402
00:13:43,064 --> 00:13:44,881
I know! I know!
I thought I had room.
403
00:13:44,974 --> 00:13:46,899
-I can make this work!
-Dad, come on!
404
00:13:46,993 --> 00:13:48,159
The teens grew up already.
405
00:13:48,386 --> 00:13:50,053
Okay, it's very easy
to judge the parker
406
00:13:50,071 --> 00:13:51,329
when you're not the one parking.
407
00:13:51,556 --> 00:13:53,647
-Here we go. Kind of.
-Okay, Dad, Dad, Dad!
408
00:13:53,741 --> 00:13:56,334
There. We're parked.
Let's talk about something else.
409
00:13:56,561 --> 00:13:58,485
Okay, I'm going in.
Wait. What's my plan?
410
00:13:58,505 --> 00:14:00,396
Um, what if I, like,
sit near them
411
00:14:00,489 --> 00:14:02,156
and casually sing
a Mud Stains song?
412
00:14:02,175 --> 00:14:03,490
And they'll hear me,
and they'll be like,
413
00:14:03,568 --> 00:14:05,068
"Hey, we just
went to their concert."
414
00:14:05,236 --> 00:14:07,011
And I'll be like, "Yeah,
I-I went to that concert, too.
415
00:14:07,163 --> 00:14:09,255
I mean, basically. I wa--
I was right outside of it."
416
00:14:09,407 --> 00:14:11,090
And then we'll talk all night
about how similar we all are.
417
00:14:11,184 --> 00:14:14,001
But not all night.
Maybe just for a few minutes?
418
00:14:14,095 --> 00:14:15,261
No, all night seems fine.
419
00:14:15,338 --> 00:14:16,855
We don't want to waste
this parking spot.
420
00:14:17,006 --> 00:14:18,523
Oh, my God. What if we
exchange phone numbers?
421
00:14:18,750 --> 00:14:20,583
I need a phone!
All cool kids have phones.
422
00:14:20,676 --> 00:14:22,768
There are plenty of cool people
who don't have phones.
423
00:14:22,863 --> 00:14:24,270
Not right now
with that speech, Mom!
424
00:14:24,364 --> 00:14:26,531
-O-Okay, okay.
-Uh, here. Tina, take mine.
425
00:14:26,758 --> 00:14:27,848
Thank you, Dad.
426
00:14:27,868 --> 00:14:29,075
Text me the menu.
427
00:14:29,944 --> 00:14:32,095
-Whoa.
-Sit anywhere you like.
428
00:14:32,113 --> 00:14:33,905
Okay, I'm just gonna sit here
for a sec.
429
00:14:34,057 --> 00:14:35,689
And then maybe
I'll move over there.
430
00:14:35,709 --> 00:14:39,193
Great. I love when customers
move around. Something to drink?
431
00:14:39,287 --> 00:14:41,604
Oh. Um, no. Yes. Coffee.
432
00:14:41,606 --> 00:14:44,273
Like, uh, those kids
are drinking over there?
433
00:14:44,367 --> 00:14:45,532
-That's coffee, right?
-(phone buzzes)
434
00:14:45,552 --> 00:14:47,293
-Yes. Good eye.
-Hello?
435
00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:48,945
LINDA:
Hi, you're on speaker.
How you doing?
436
00:14:49,114 --> 00:14:50,388
GENE:
And heads up that your mouth's
437
00:14:50,539 --> 00:14:52,448
-just hanging open.
-Oh, okay. Thanks.
438
00:14:52,467 --> 00:14:54,559
And you sat at, like, the
farthest booth away from them.
439
00:14:54,710 --> 00:14:56,227
TINA: Yep, yep.
Didn't quite get my legs
440
00:14:56,304 --> 00:14:57,711
all the way
where I wanted to go.
441
00:14:57,731 --> 00:14:59,546
And I guess
it's gonna be hard for them
442
00:14:59,566 --> 00:15:00,381
to hear me singing
from way over here.
443
00:15:00,475 --> 00:15:01,290
Just belt it.
444
00:15:01,309 --> 00:15:02,734
No, Tina. Do-Don't do that.
445
00:15:02,885 --> 00:15:05,719
People like people who sing loud
in restaurants. Ask Mom.
446
00:15:05,813 --> 00:15:07,296
♪ They do...! ♪
447
00:15:07,315 --> 00:15:08,648
But yeah, don't do that.
448
00:15:08,800 --> 00:15:11,000
(sighs) I just got to
figure out a way to start over.
449
00:15:11,002 --> 00:15:12,410
Should I go out
and come back in?
450
00:15:12,561 --> 00:15:14,153
Yes. And do you know
how to cartwheel? Try that.
451
00:15:14,247 --> 00:15:17,156
Tina, it's Louise. Just pretend
you have to go to the bathroom
452
00:15:17,325 --> 00:15:18,750
and then sing it on the way.
453
00:15:18,826 --> 00:15:20,251
But put it in words
they understand.
454
00:15:20,403 --> 00:15:22,161
Tell them you got to make
a "nine inch nail."
455
00:15:22,313 --> 00:15:23,980
Yeah. Some of that could work.
456
00:15:24,073 --> 00:15:25,815
Okay. Here I go.
457
00:15:25,833 --> 00:15:27,984
♪ Here's a riddle ♪
458
00:15:28,077 --> 00:15:29,427
-LINDA: There she goes.
-GENE: Nope.
459
00:15:29,654 --> 00:15:31,170
-She's sitting down again.
-BOB: She's up. She's doing it.
460
00:15:31,322 --> 00:15:32,913
You're halfway. Keep going.
461
00:15:33,082 --> 00:15:36,417
Nope. Legs? Remember?
What I just said? Okay.
462
00:15:36,436 --> 00:15:38,995
♪ Here's a riddle, it's my ♪
463
00:15:39,088 --> 00:15:41,272
♪ Middle finger ♪
464
00:15:41,424 --> 00:15:43,608
♪ Is... ♪
(gasps, groans)
465
00:15:44,277 --> 00:15:45,926
LOUISE:
What's she doing?
466
00:15:45,946 --> 00:15:47,520
(groans) What am I doing?
467
00:15:47,722 --> 00:15:49,113
Is she waiting on them?
468
00:15:49,340 --> 00:15:51,115
That's not what's happening,
right?
469
00:15:51,342 --> 00:15:52,617
LINDA:
W-Why would she do that?
470
00:15:52,768 --> 00:15:54,268
LOUISE:
It's her training kicking in.
471
00:15:54,362 --> 00:15:56,103
She's like the worst
Jason Bourne.
472
00:15:56,197 --> 00:15:56,955
Oh, I can't look.
473
00:15:57,106 --> 00:15:59,606
Um, here you go.
474
00:15:59,684 --> 00:16:02,776
Thanks. Wait. Do you work
at that burger restaurant?
475
00:16:02,854 --> 00:16:04,003
Uh, yeah.
476
00:16:04,113 --> 00:16:06,297
And you work here, too?
Aren't you, like, a kid?
477
00:16:06,449 --> 00:16:08,708
-Uh...
-Are you sitting here now?
478
00:16:08,860 --> 00:16:11,285
Customers don't usually pour
the water. Here's your coffee.
479
00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:13,787
Uh, okay, um, uh, hmm.
(gasps)
480
00:16:13,881 --> 00:16:16,365
-Oh, uh...
-Sorry, sorry. Uh...
481
00:16:16,459 --> 00:16:17,291
Oh, geez.
482
00:16:17,310 --> 00:16:18,551
-I'll get a napkin.
-Sorry.
483
00:16:18,645 --> 00:16:21,220
Uh, I've got to
make a nine inch nail. Bye!
484
00:16:21,372 --> 00:16:24,148
-Whoa! Hey.
-Huh. Huh. Huh. Huh.
485
00:16:24,375 --> 00:16:27,151
-(grunting, panting)
-(phone buzzes)
486
00:16:27,378 --> 00:16:28,820
Tina? W-We saw what happened.
487
00:16:28,971 --> 00:16:31,047
I mean, your mother didn't see.
She had her eyes closed.
488
00:16:31,065 --> 00:16:32,473
Uh, you doing all right?
489
00:16:32,567 --> 00:16:34,217
I've got to get out of here!
I messed everything up!
490
00:16:34,310 --> 00:16:36,477
And I ran into the bathroom, and
now I don't know how to leave
491
00:16:36,571 --> 00:16:37,978
without walking
right by their table!
492
00:16:37,998 --> 00:16:39,388
LINDA:
It's okay, honey. It's okay.
493
00:16:39,482 --> 00:16:40,832
LOUISE:
Tina? It's Louise again.
494
00:16:40,941 --> 00:16:42,483
We're gonna
get you out of there.
495
00:16:42,502 --> 00:16:44,168
I can't pull up any schematics
of the building,
496
00:16:44,395 --> 00:16:46,245
-but look around.
Do you see a window?
-Yes.
497
00:16:46,414 --> 00:16:47,839
It's really small. I-I don't
think I can fit through it.
498
00:16:47,990 --> 00:16:49,490
GENE:
Maybe take out your bones
and then try it?
499
00:16:49,509 --> 00:16:50,657
Tina, it's okay.
500
00:16:50,677 --> 00:16:53,236
Just get back out there
and talk to them.
501
00:16:53,254 --> 00:16:55,329
Yeah.
Y-You can turn this around.
502
00:16:55,348 --> 00:16:58,074
Of course you can.
Just take a deep breath
503
00:16:58,092 --> 00:16:59,425
and calmly walk out there and...
504
00:16:59,519 --> 00:17:01,385
Start the car!
I'm gonna make a run for it!
505
00:17:01,462 --> 00:17:02,562
Tina, no!
506
00:17:03,915 --> 00:17:06,340
(grunting)
507
00:17:06,359 --> 00:17:08,768
Uh, money.
Uh, here-here's money.
508
00:17:08,862 --> 00:17:10,511
(grunting)
509
00:17:10,530 --> 00:17:12,012
(yells)
510
00:17:12,032 --> 00:17:14,848
LINDA:
Tina, honey!
What happened? Tina!
511
00:17:14,868 --> 00:17:16,117
Oh...
512
00:17:21,599 --> 00:17:25,434
So, nice to get out
and about together.
513
00:17:25,528 --> 00:17:27,045
No?
514
00:17:28,122 --> 00:17:29,380
Quiet in there.
515
00:17:29,532 --> 00:17:31,941
She's not sobbing,
like earlier. So that's good.
516
00:17:32,034 --> 00:17:33,700
Do you think Tina
needs a sock necktie?
517
00:17:33,795 --> 00:17:36,128
She's probably feeling left out.
Should we go to the hamper?
518
00:17:36,281 --> 00:17:39,615
Or, maybe, actually, I don't
want to wear mine anymore.
519
00:17:39,634 --> 00:17:40,783
So I win?
520
00:17:40,952 --> 00:17:43,561
Do you? I mean, you have
a pretty serious rash.
521
00:17:43,712 --> 00:17:44,637
And I'm getting one, too.
522
00:17:44,806 --> 00:17:46,230
I feel like we both lost.
523
00:17:46,382 --> 00:17:48,733
And so did everyone around us.
524
00:17:48,884 --> 00:17:50,810
Yes. Sorry, but yes to that.
525
00:17:50,904 --> 00:17:52,219
Well, if we're quitting
at the same time,
526
00:17:52,313 --> 00:17:53,720
then maybe we both win?
527
00:17:53,815 --> 00:17:55,389
And we're both
strong, powerful women?
528
00:17:55,558 --> 00:17:56,557
Yeah. Way to go.
529
00:17:56,576 --> 00:17:57,650
Yeah, congrats, congrats.
530
00:17:57,744 --> 00:17:58,801
-Oh, thank God!
-Yes, finally!
531
00:17:58,820 --> 00:17:59,911
What creams do we have?
532
00:18:00,138 --> 00:18:01,971
Anything in
the anti-fungal family?
533
00:18:02,064 --> 00:18:02,914
Quite a few, I think.
534
00:18:03,065 --> 00:18:04,323
Knock, knock.
535
00:18:04,475 --> 00:18:05,899
I don't want to talk about it.
536
00:18:05,919 --> 00:18:06,976
You sure?
537
00:18:07,145 --> 00:18:08,586
-Yes.
-Okay.
538
00:18:08,737 --> 00:18:10,479
I don't know how to walk
in boots like that!
539
00:18:10,573 --> 00:18:12,090
I don't know
why they like that band!
540
00:18:12,317 --> 00:18:13,499
I-I don't know
how to be like them.
541
00:18:13,651 --> 00:18:16,152
It's just, I know
I'm never gonna be confi-cool.
542
00:18:16,170 --> 00:18:18,654
Tina, you are confi-cool!
543
00:18:18,673 --> 00:18:20,656
No, I'm not. I'm just me.
544
00:18:20,749 --> 00:18:22,992
But, honey, that's the secret
to being cool.
545
00:18:23,085 --> 00:18:25,085
Being who you are,
doing your own thing.
546
00:18:25,163 --> 00:18:27,772
But I don't want to be who I am.
I want to be them!
547
00:18:27,923 --> 00:18:28,940
I know, sweetie.
548
00:18:29,167 --> 00:18:31,000
I remember that feeling,
when I was your age.
549
00:18:31,002 --> 00:18:33,169
I just wish you could see
what I see.
550
00:18:33,262 --> 00:18:35,838
Then you'd know how great and
cool and interesting you are.
551
00:18:35,857 --> 00:18:38,282
That's the stuff you have to say
because you're my mom.
552
00:18:38,434 --> 00:18:41,285
No, that's what I know
from being a teenager.
553
00:18:41,512 --> 00:18:43,770
Come on, you think I never tried
to change who I was
554
00:18:43,790 --> 00:18:45,514
to make the cool kids like me?
555
00:18:45,533 --> 00:18:47,566
But trying to make people
think you're cool is exhausting.
556
00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:50,035
And when you stop trying,
suddenly the next person
557
00:18:50,130 --> 00:18:52,329
you talk to thinks
you're the best person ever.
558
00:18:52,482 --> 00:18:54,948
Thanks, Mom.
Thanks for trying to help.
559
00:18:54,968 --> 00:18:57,468
But... ugh.
560
00:18:57,620 --> 00:18:59,119
(moans)
561
00:18:59,213 --> 00:19:01,514
(dramatic piano music playing)
562
00:19:03,977 --> 00:19:06,394
♪ ♪
563
00:19:11,967 --> 00:19:14,110
♪ ♪
564
00:19:22,553 --> 00:19:25,496
♪ ♪
565
00:19:29,502 --> 00:19:31,335
♪ ♪
566
00:19:31,487 --> 00:19:33,320
Okay, ketchups,
you're all married.
567
00:19:33,414 --> 00:19:35,322
You can go start
your ketchup families now.
568
00:19:35,400 --> 00:19:36,841
(chuckles)
Or not. No pressure.
569
00:19:36,992 --> 00:19:38,676
-(doorbell jingles)
-My ketchup
wants to marry a mustard.
570
00:19:38,903 --> 00:19:40,736
-Please don't do that.
-Love is love!
571
00:19:40,829 --> 00:19:41,679
Hi!
572
00:19:41,830 --> 00:19:43,347
Hi. I'm picking up
a to-go order.
573
00:19:43,499 --> 00:19:45,165
-(gasps)
-Oh! I'll get it.
574
00:19:45,185 --> 00:19:46,409
-How's it going?
-Oh.
575
00:19:46,427 --> 00:19:47,927
Uh, hi.
576
00:19:48,021 --> 00:19:50,855
I've been in a few times.
I'm Sage, by the way.
577
00:19:51,006 --> 00:19:52,264
I'm Tina. From here,
578
00:19:52,433 --> 00:19:54,934
and also from falling on my face
in the Greek place.
579
00:19:55,028 --> 00:19:56,343
That looked painful.
580
00:19:56,362 --> 00:19:59,346
It was. And-and I thought
I broke my glasses.
581
00:19:59,365 --> 00:20:01,982
But I didn't. So feeling
pretty good about that.
582
00:20:02,035 --> 00:20:03,943
-I like your glasses a lot.
-Really? Thanks.
583
00:20:04,095 --> 00:20:06,946
They're prescription.
For my, um, eyes.
584
00:20:07,098 --> 00:20:09,040
-Makes sense.
-I like your nose ring.
585
00:20:09,267 --> 00:20:10,691
Thanks. I like your barrette.
586
00:20:10,710 --> 00:20:12,935
M-My barrette's prescription,
too. (chuckles)
587
00:20:13,104 --> 00:20:15,862
(laughs) Same with my nose ring.
Doctor's orders.
588
00:20:15,957 --> 00:20:17,106
Here you go, hon.
589
00:20:17,124 --> 00:20:19,032
Thanks. Keep the change.
See you.
590
00:20:19,052 --> 00:20:20,718
Bye, Sage.
591
00:20:20,945 --> 00:20:24,630
Look at you, cracking jokes,
you cool little cucumber.
592
00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:26,707
Ah! Holy crap! I talked to her!
593
00:20:26,801 --> 00:20:29,543
We talked! We were two cool
people talking to each other!
594
00:20:29,562 --> 00:20:31,136
-Ah! Ha! Yeah!
-Ow!
595
00:20:31,289 --> 00:20:32,546
-All right.
-Oh!
596
00:20:32,565 --> 00:20:33,956
-You're high-fiving all of us.
-Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
597
00:20:33,958 --> 00:20:35,215
GENE:
I'll take it.
598
00:20:35,235 --> 00:20:36,141
TINA:
So, I guess
599
00:20:36,294 --> 00:20:37,476
I'm just gonna do my own thing?
600
00:20:37,570 --> 00:20:39,478
I'm not quite sure
what my thing is,
601
00:20:39,630 --> 00:20:41,239
but I think I like it?
602
00:20:41,390 --> 00:20:42,889
Oh, God.
I'm thinking about it too much.
603
00:20:42,942 --> 00:20:45,225
Forget it. Forget it.
Um, new topic.
604
00:20:45,245 --> 00:20:47,820
Uh, like, um, when French people
kiss with their tongue,
605
00:20:47,972 --> 00:20:49,580
do they call it "us kissing"?
606
00:20:49,657 --> 00:20:50,897
♪ Wafty, wafty, wafty ♪
607
00:20:50,917 --> 00:20:52,733
♪ Pshew, pshew, pshew ♪
608
00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:54,252
♪ Wafty, wafty, wafty ♪
609
00:20:54,328 --> 00:20:56,161
♪ Pshew, pshew, pshew ♪
610
00:20:56,314 --> 00:20:57,496
♪ Wafty, wafty, wafty ♪
611
00:20:57,590 --> 00:20:59,148
♪ Pshew, pshew, pshew ♪
612
00:20:59,241 --> 00:21:00,624
♪ Wafty, wafty, wafty ♪
613
00:21:00,760 --> 00:21:02,075
♪ Pshew, pshew, pshew ♪
614
00:21:02,095 --> 00:21:04,595
♪ Wafty, wafty ♪
615
00:21:04,822 --> 00:21:08,173
♪ Wafty,
wafty ♪
616
00:21:08,326 --> 00:21:11,060
♪ Wafty, wafty ♪
617
00:21:11,754 --> 00:21:14,605
♪ Wafty, wafty ♪
618
00:21:14,832 --> 00:21:16,332
♪ Wafty, wafty, wafty ♪
619
00:21:16,350 --> 00:21:17,516
♪ Pshew, pshew, pshew ♪
620
00:21:17,668 --> 00:21:19,259
♪ Wafty, wafty, wafty ♪
621
00:21:19,353 --> 00:21:21,020
-♪ Pshew, pshew, pshew ♪
-♪ Wafty, wafty, wafty. ♪
622
00:21:21,172 --> 00:21:22,671
Captioning sponsored by
BENTO BOX ENTERTAINMENT
623
00:21:22,690 --> 00:21:24,991
and TOYOTA.