1
00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:04,441
Oh, my God! You fancy him, don't you?

2
00:00:04,561 --> 00:00:06,281
- Who was she?
- She was...

3
00:00:06,401 --> 00:00:07,721
my girlfriend.

4
00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:08,841
She died.

5
00:00:08,961 --> 00:00:11,681
So did you wanna go for that drink,
like a date?

6
00:00:11,801 --> 00:00:12,881
Yeah.

7
00:00:13,001 --> 00:00:15,641
- What about Shannon?
- She's not coming back.

8
00:00:15,761 --> 00:00:18,601
You just had unprotected
anal sex with that girl.

9
00:00:18,721 --> 00:00:20,161
I most certainly did.

10
00:00:20,281 --> 00:00:22,601
- And she loved it!
- What if she's got HIV?

11
00:00:22,721 --> 00:00:25,161
Cute girls don't get HIV!

12
00:00:25,281 --> 00:00:28,041
Thanks for the hand job,
but you're quite old

13
00:00:28,161 --> 00:00:30,361
and you cry a lot.

14
00:00:30,481 --> 00:00:32,521
She was me first, Clare.

15
00:00:32,641 --> 00:00:33,561
He just sleeps with people,

16
00:00:33,681 --> 00:00:36,361
he's out of there before he's had time
to take his condom off.

17
00:00:37,921 --> 00:00:41,481
This turning into a girl thing, is that
born out of some sort of sexual confusion?

18
00:00:41,601 --> 00:00:44,001
You ain't lived
until you've had a multiple orgasm.

19
00:00:44,121 --> 00:00:47,641
All over your body,
like waves of pleasure.

20
00:00:47,761 --> 00:00:49,601
Were you...wanking?

21
00:00:49,721 --> 00:00:51,041
So what if I was?

22
00:00:51,161 --> 00:00:54,521
- I think you've got your period.
- No-one needs to see that.

23
00:00:56,001 --> 00:00:59,161
Why did she stab me?
What did I ever do to her?

24
00:00:59,281 --> 00:01:00,481
That wasn't Kelly.

25
00:01:00,601 --> 00:01:02,441
She's swapped bodies.

26
00:01:02,561 --> 00:01:03,881
You'll be fine.

27
00:01:12,881 --> 00:01:13,961
All right?

28
00:01:21,601 --> 00:01:23,961
Top party! You are pretty.
You've got nice...

29
00:01:24,081 --> 00:01:25,601
What are them? These here.

30
00:01:25,721 --> 00:01:26,801
They're c-collarbones!

31
00:01:29,361 --> 00:01:32,961
Do you mind if I smell your hair?
Or is that a bit creepy?

32
00:01:33,081 --> 00:01:34,161
Bit creepy. Mm!

33
00:01:37,361 --> 00:01:41,721
All right? You know,
you have really slim ankles!

34
00:01:41,841 --> 00:01:44,321
Yeah, that smells like, er...

35
00:01:44,441 --> 00:01:47,561
smells like Ready Brek.

36
00:01:47,681 --> 00:01:51,161
Sexy bone, that.
Very...very underrated bone, innit?

37
00:01:51,281 --> 00:01:52,801
Mm.

38
00:01:55,961 --> 00:01:58,681
I'll tell you who's got
the best ankles - the Chinese.

39
00:01:58,801 --> 00:02:01,161
Because you never see a Chinese woman
with fat ankles, do you?

40
00:02:01,281 --> 00:02:02,721
I love Ready Brek, me.

41
00:02:02,841 --> 00:02:04,161
It's the, er....

42
00:02:04,281 --> 00:02:06,761
it's the breakfast of champions.

43
00:02:13,281 --> 00:02:15,881
Whoo!

44
00:02:22,841 --> 00:02:23,561
Mmm...

45
00:02:23,681 --> 00:02:26,961
Whoa, whoa! What is that?! What /s that?

46
00:02:27,081 --> 00:02:30,321
- Oh!
- Have we got any use for that? No?

47
00:02:32,361 --> 00:02:33,241
- Wait.
- What?

48
00:02:33,361 --> 00:02:34,601
I don't wanna do this if it's just
gonna be a one-night thing.

49
00:02:34,721 --> 00:02:37,241
- No, no, no, no. Course not.
- I'm sick of guys treating me like shit.

50
00:02:37,361 --> 00:02:39,561
- Yeah, I know. Yeah, yeah.
- You promise you'll call me tomorrow?

51
00:02:39,681 --> 00:02:43,401
Love, I promise. I promise you
I am not one of them guys.

52
00:02:43,521 --> 00:02:46,281
That's it now. Oh, it's on!

53
00:02:46,401 --> 00:02:49,241
- It is on! Sweet child o' mine!
- Oh!

54
00:02:49,361 --> 00:02:50,361
Are you ready?

55
00:02:50,481 --> 00:02:53,281
Yeah?

56
00:03:10,801 --> 00:03:13,041
Ooh! Hoo-ooh! Oooh!

57
00:03:21,521 --> 00:03:23,441
Nice one for that! I needed it.

58
00:03:23,561 --> 00:03:26,161
Oh! Listen, I, er...

59
00:03:26,281 --> 00:03:29,081
I think you're wonderful
and everything, but, er...

60
00:03:29,201 --> 00:03:31,281
I think it's only fair to say
I won't be calling you.

61
00:03:31,401 --> 00:03:35,001
What?! So you just fuck me and leave?
You said you weren't one of those guys?

62
00:03:35,121 --> 00:03:36,841
Yeah, I lied. Have...

63
00:03:36,961 --> 00:03:38,641
Whoa, whoa!

64
00:03:38,761 --> 00:03:40,081
Ohh! Easy, tiger!

65
00:03:40,201 --> 00:03:42,521
Ahhh! Oh!

66
00:03:44,041 --> 00:03:45,721
It was nice knowing you and everything.

67
00:03:46,961 --> 00:03:49,401
Wanker.

68
00:04:11,921 --> 00:04:15,481
# The city breathing, the people churning

69
00:04:15,601 --> 00:04:17,601
# The conversating

70
00:04:17,721 --> 00:04:19,561
# The price is what?

71
00:04:33,881 --> 00:04:35,361
# The conversating

72
00:04:35,481 --> 00:04:37,321
# This place is heaven

73
00:04:37,441 --> 00:04:38,881
# And if you see them... #

74
00:04:39,001 --> 00:04:42,761
She was nice.
She was a...nice...nice girl.

75
00:04:42,881 --> 00:04:44,201
Nice and pretty.

76
00:04:48,161 --> 00:04:49,561
I've gotta be honest -
I don't really remember.

77
00:04:49,681 --> 00:04:53,281
You can't remember someone
you had sex with? Classy

78
00:04:53,401 --> 00:04:54,681
Well, she was certainly happy
with the service.

79
00:04:54,801 --> 00:04:58,201
Look what old Rudy found
in his jeans this morning.

80
00:04:58,321 --> 00:05:00,841
The digits!

81
00:05:00,961 --> 00:05:02,481
So are you going to call her?

82
00:05:02,601 --> 00:05:05,881
No! No, I'm not.
And I'll tell you why.

83
00:05:06,001 --> 00:05:09,001
When you buy a dog, right,

84
00:05:09,121 --> 00:05:12,041
you know that one day,
the dog, it'll grow old

85
00:05:12,161 --> 00:05:13,841
and it'll die. Oh!

86
00:05:13,961 --> 00:05:15,801
And you're gonna be...
you're just gonna be heartbroken.

87
00:05:15,921 --> 00:05:17,561
Cos you loved that dog,
he was just a cheeky little scamp.

88
00:05:17,681 --> 00:05:21,801
Here's an idea. Don't buy
the fucking dog in the first place.

89
00:05:21,921 --> 00:05:23,761
Save everyone the bastard hassle.

90
00:05:23,881 --> 00:05:26,161
- Right.
- All I'm saying is,

91
00:05:26,281 --> 00:05:28,281
it's better that I make her cry
a little bit now

92
00:05:28,401 --> 00:05:31,321
than break her heart in three years' time
when she's totally in love with me

93
00:05:31,441 --> 00:05:33,361
and we've bought
a load of shitty furniture together.

94
00:05:33,481 --> 00:05:38,121
It's...it's just the humane thing to do,
isn't it?

95
00:05:38,241 --> 00:05:39,801
- You prick.
- I know.

96
00:05:39,921 --> 00:05:41,881
- What are we doing today?
- We're doing nothing.

97
00:05:42,001 --> 00:05:44,641
- The probation worker's dead.
- Oh, yeah.

98
00:05:44,761 --> 00:05:47,641
- Do we even need to be here?
- If the probation worker goes missing

99
00:05:47,761 --> 00:05:49,481
and we don't turn up to community service,
it looks suspicious.

100
00:05:49,601 --> 00:05:51,201
Whoa, whoa.

101
00:05:51,321 --> 00:05:53,281
Shh-shh-shh-shh!

102
00:05:53,401 --> 00:05:54,761
What was that?

103
00:05:56,481 --> 00:05:57,761
I can't hear anything.

104
00:06:01,761 --> 00:06:04,281
There!
You must...you must've heard that?

105
00:06:08,081 --> 00:06:09,921
Bingo!

106
00:06:10,041 --> 00:06:12,561
It's the fucking ice-cream van!
Right, who wants what?

107
00:06:12,681 --> 00:06:15,441
Who wants what? Come on!
You...c-c-come with me!

108
00:06:15,561 --> 00:06:17,481
I need an extra pair of hands. Curtis!

109
00:06:18,561 --> 00:06:21,241
Come...! Curtis!

110
00:06:22,401 --> 00:06:23,801
Come on.

111
00:06:40,841 --> 00:06:42,321
Oi!

112
00:06:42,441 --> 00:06:44,001
I said...

113
00:06:44,121 --> 00:06:45,761
ice cream!
Ice-cream van's here!

114
00:06:45,881 --> 00:06:48,281
What you having?
Look, don't worry about money.

115
00:06:48,401 --> 00:06:50,041
- We'll sort all that out later.
- Fuck off!

116
00:06:50,161 --> 00:06:52,721
Well, you'll be sorry, won't you,
when you've not got an ice cream

117
00:06:52,841 --> 00:06:54,561
and I'll, mm,
and I'll be licking an ice cream?

118
00:06:54,681 --> 00:06:56,401
You won't have anything.
You won't have anything!

119
00:07:01,281 --> 00:07:02,641
I'm gonna have to go inside.

120
00:07:03,841 --> 00:07:05,401
- D'you have to?
- Well, they always send

121
00:07:05,521 --> 00:07:07,401
a new probation worker
after we've killed one.

122
00:07:13,441 --> 00:07:15,561
Do you wanna come in?

123
00:07:16,921 --> 00:07:19,281
Yeah, all right.

124
00:07:25,041 --> 00:07:26,681
- Hi.
- Hi.

125
00:07:26,801 --> 00:07:27,801
I might...

126
00:07:30,801 --> 00:07:31,961
I, um...

127
00:07:32,081 --> 00:07:34,481
I...I'd like some ice cream.

128
00:07:34,601 --> 00:07:35,881
Good, cos I sell those.

129
00:07:37,361 --> 00:07:38,721
Right.

130
00:07:38,841 --> 00:07:40,241
Um...

131
00:07:40,361 --> 00:07:41,681
Three cones.

132
00:07:41,801 --> 00:07:43,201
And, um...

133
00:07:43,321 --> 00:07:45,641
and a rainbow lolly thing.

134
00:07:45,761 --> 00:07:47,681
D'you want some nuts and sauce?

135
00:07:47,801 --> 00:07:49,121
Nuts!

136
00:07:49,241 --> 00:07:50,481
Give me some nu...

137
00:07:50,601 --> 00:07:52,161
Whoa! Give me some nuts,

138
00:07:52,281 --> 00:07:54,361
extra sauce and a Flake, please.

139
00:07:54,481 --> 00:07:57,481
It's a buzzin' day, innit, man?

140
00:07:57,601 --> 00:07:58,721
No work, eh,

141
00:07:58,841 --> 00:08:01,361
nuts, extra sauce and a Flake.

142
00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:02,641
Could this day get any better?

143
00:08:02,761 --> 00:08:04,161
What?!

144
00:08:05,401 --> 00:08:06,481
What?

145
00:08:06,601 --> 00:08:07,841
Oh, hello.

146
00:08:09,961 --> 00:08:11,081
Hi.

147
00:08:12,521 --> 00:08:13,881
Where's your mate?

148
00:08:14,841 --> 00:08:15,641
He...

149
00:08:15,761 --> 00:08:17,601
had to make a call.

150
00:08:17,721 --> 00:08:18,761
Oh.

151
00:08:20,121 --> 00:08:21,801
There's your first two.

152
00:08:21,921 --> 00:08:22,961
Give. Give 'em.

153
00:08:33,241 --> 00:08:35,801
So...what was that all about,

154
00:08:35,921 --> 00:08:38,761
the whole...sex-change-switch thing?

155
00:08:38,881 --> 00:08:41,121
Dunno. Just happened.

156
00:08:41,241 --> 00:08:44,161
Well, may I just say,
you're looking particularly fine today.

157
00:08:44,281 --> 00:08:46,121
Me, personally,

158
00:08:46,241 --> 00:08:48,921
I could never get tired
of looking at that arse...

159
00:08:49,041 --> 00:08:50,001
Is that right?

160
00:08:50,121 --> 00:08:51,001
Right, now, you're gonna have to tell me

161
00:08:51,121 --> 00:08:53,161
when you're gonna change like that,
mate, eh?

162
00:08:53,281 --> 00:08:54,561
It's horrible.

163
00:08:54,681 --> 00:08:56,761
Here.

164
00:09:01,641 --> 00:09:03,801
Hmmm...

165
00:09:14,521 --> 00:09:16,921
What the fuck is that?

166
00:09:20,481 --> 00:09:23,921
It fucking came off!
Me fucking dick's come off, man!

167
00:09:24,041 --> 00:09:26,841
That's what happens when you fuck me
and then just walk away.

168
00:09:26,961 --> 00:09:28,481
Have you done this to me?

169
00:09:28,601 --> 00:09:31,321
I'm not gonna let guys like you
do shit like this to me any more.

170
00:09:31,441 --> 00:09:33,481
Well, fuckin' pack it in ice, man!

171
00:09:33,601 --> 00:09:35,041
Oh, you dick! Look what you've done!

172
00:09:35,161 --> 00:09:37,241
D-D-D-Don't step on it!

173
00:09:38,761 --> 00:09:40,161
Take this.

174
00:09:48,281 --> 00:09:50,601
Is there...is there something wrong
with your penis?

175
00:09:51,801 --> 00:09:53,281
- Jesus!
- I know!

176
00:09:53,401 --> 00:09:55,441
- Christ!
- Dude, that is like

177
00:09:55,561 --> 00:09:57,601
no STD I have ever seen.

178
00:09:57,721 --> 00:09:59,721
And trust me, mate, I've seen 'em,
I've seen 'em all.

179
00:09:59,841 --> 00:10:02,961
It's a power thing. That...qgirl
you slept with, she gave it to you.

180
00:10:03,081 --> 00:10:04,801
How do you know?

181
00:10:04,921 --> 00:10:06,321
I saw the future. Put...

182
00:10:06,441 --> 00:10:08,961
Oh, sorry. Yeah. Well, what happened?

183
00:10:10,681 --> 00:10:11,561
It...it came off.

184
00:10:11,681 --> 00:10:13,081
- What came off?
- Your cock.

185
00:10:13,201 --> 00:10:16,401
- My cock came off?
- Yes. Then someone stood on it.

186
00:10:16,521 --> 00:10:20,841
My cock came...! Well...
I do not wanna live without my cock.

187
00:10:20,961 --> 00:10:23,281
That's just one version of the future.
We can change it.

188
00:10:23,401 --> 00:10:24,521
How?

189
00:10:24,641 --> 00:10:26,521
She said it was a punishment
for sleeping with her and walking away.

190
00:10:26,641 --> 00:10:27,761
Right!

191
00:10:27,881 --> 00:10:32,641
So I just need to fuck her again, and
my cock'll go back to normal, won't it?

192
00:10:33,921 --> 00:10:36,361
- I think so. I'm not sure.
- I need to find her

193
00:10:36,481 --> 00:10:37,681
and shag her right now.

194
00:10:38,921 --> 00:10:40,161
You have her number.

195
00:10:40,281 --> 00:10:42,201
Ooh, f...

196
00:10:42,321 --> 00:10:44,521
Shit! Fuck!

197
00:10:59,361 --> 00:11:01,041
- Really?
- What did you expect?

198
00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:03,041
It's not a five-star hotel.

199
00:11:05,401 --> 00:11:07,601
Well, I mean, we can always leave it,
if you want.

200
00:11:07,721 --> 00:11:08,881
No!

201
00:11:09,001 --> 00:11:10,721
Come here.

202
00:11:23,081 --> 00:11:26,001
Right, so...

203
00:11:26,121 --> 00:11:27,641
read out the numbers -
I'm gonna dial it.

204
00:11:27,761 --> 00:11:29,881
- Zero...
- Good start.

205
00:11:30,001 --> 00:11:31,361
Come on.

206
00:11:32,761 --> 00:11:34,841
...double seven, double zero,
nine, double zero.

207
00:11:34,961 --> 00:11:36,281
That's all we've got.

208
00:11:36,401 --> 00:11:37,801
- W...
- We're missing the last two.

209
00:11:37,921 --> 00:11:40,321
Right, well, I'm gonna have to try every
combination till I get the right one,

210
00:11:40,441 --> 00:11:41,841
aren't I?

211
00:11:43,961 --> 00:11:47,041
Hello! My name's Rudy.
I was just wondering if you can help me.

212
00:11:47,161 --> 00:11:50,281
Did I have sex with you last night?
Because I...

213
00:11:50,401 --> 00:11:51,521
Hello?

214
00:11:51,641 --> 00:11:53,401
Hell...? Hello?

215
00:11:53,521 --> 00:11:55,361
Well, I'm sorry, but how rude's that?

216
00:11:55,481 --> 00:11:56,761
Eh?

217
00:11:56,881 --> 00:11:58,641
Unbelievable.

218
00:11:58,761 --> 00:12:01,161
Hello! It's Rudy.

219
00:12:01,281 --> 00:12:03,041
Um, basically... No...

220
00:12:03,161 --> 00:12:04,641
No, no, no, no, no. Not right now.

221
00:12:04,761 --> 00:12:07,281
I'm on the phone.
Um, yeah, just a quick question.

222
00:12:07,401 --> 00:12:10,401
Did I have sex with you last night?

223
00:12:12,721 --> 00:12:15,361
Hell...? Fuck!

224
00:12:15,481 --> 00:12:16,841
I'm not even gonna ask.

225
00:12:17,841 --> 00:12:20,201
This isn't going to work.

226
00:12:20,321 --> 00:12:22,561
You need to try and remember
what happened last night.

227
00:12:23,801 --> 00:12:26,881
There was one gi...two gi...
there was... There was three girls.

228
00:12:27,001 --> 00:12:28,881
There was definitely three.

229
00:12:29,001 --> 00:12:32,041
So it's one in three.
What were their names?

230
00:12:32,161 --> 00:12:35,041
- I've no idea.
- What did they look like?

231
00:12:38,241 --> 00:12:39,681
Ankles.

232
00:12:43,161 --> 00:12:44,601
Collarbones.

233
00:12:48,201 --> 00:12:50,961
Ready Brek.

234
00:12:51,081 --> 00:12:52,201
Ready Brek?

235
00:12:52,321 --> 00:12:54,841
If you've nothing constructive to say,

236
00:12:54,961 --> 00:12:56,481
then please, man, shut the fuck up.

237
00:12:56,601 --> 00:12:58,361
We should retrace your steps,

238
00:12:58,481 --> 00:13:00,481
go back to the house,
see if she's still there.

239
00:13:00,601 --> 00:13:01,481
Yes! See this guy?

240
00:13:01,601 --> 00:13:02,841
He's good!

241
00:13:04,281 --> 00:13:06,481
You're a logic guy, and I can...
I really can respect that.

242
00:13:06,601 --> 00:13:09,121
I bet you're really good at Battleships,
aren't you?

243
00:13:09,241 --> 00:13:11,881
Anyway, stop chatting.
We've gotta save me cock.

244
00:13:15,521 --> 00:13:16,801
This is it.

245
00:13:16,921 --> 00:13:18,081
Definitely.

246
00:13:38,001 --> 00:13:40,001
Where did you see her last?

247
00:13:40,121 --> 00:13:41,521
Bedroom.

248
00:13:41,545 --> 00:13:49,545
http://hiqve.com/

249
00:14:04,121 --> 00:14:05,601
Here, man, it's her.

250
00:14:05,721 --> 00:14:08,921
Are you certain
you have the right room?

251
00:14:09,041 --> 00:14:10,441
Have we got any use for that?

252
00:14:11,481 --> 00:14:13,801
Yeah, man, I'm telling you, that is her.
That's definitely her.

253
00:14:13,921 --> 00:14:15,881
OK.

254
00:14:16,001 --> 00:14:18,321
So you just need to wake her up,

255
00:14:18,441 --> 00:14:20,001
talk to her

256
00:14:20,121 --> 00:14:22,241
and try to have sex with her.

257
00:14:22,361 --> 00:14:23,681
Or...

258
00:14:23,801 --> 00:14:25,281
Or what?

259
00:14:25,401 --> 00:14:27,241
Well, I mean, do I need...

260
00:14:27,361 --> 00:14:29,801
to wake her up?
Is that bit important?

261
00:14:29,921 --> 00:14:31,841
- What d'you mean?
- Well...

262
00:14:31,961 --> 00:14:35,161
I dunno. Can't I just slip it in there
and give her a little sleepy-fuck?

263
00:14:35,281 --> 00:14:36,561
That's rape.

264
00:14:38,281 --> 00:14:39,921
Is it?

265
00:14:40,041 --> 00:14:41,921
Yes!

266
00:14:42,041 --> 00:14:43,681
I'm not sure - that's a grey area, dude.

267
00:14:43,801 --> 00:14:45,601
No, it isn't.

268
00:14:45,721 --> 00:14:47,561
Oh! What a dick!

269
00:14:47,681 --> 00:14:49,241
You've woke her up, man!

270
00:14:49,361 --> 00:14:51,361
Just wait here, and just...

271
00:14:51,481 --> 00:14:53,921
...make sure no-one comes in, yeah?

272
00:14:54,041 --> 00:14:55,601
Hello!

273
00:14:55,721 --> 00:14:57,561
Why are you still here?

274
00:14:57,681 --> 00:14:58,881
I getit.

275
00:14:59,001 --> 00:15:01,081
You're angry at me for walking out on you.

276
00:15:01,201 --> 00:15:03,681
It was a joke!
It was a practical joke.

277
00:15:03,801 --> 00:15:06,561
And now here I am,
with these lovely flowers, look!

278
00:15:06,681 --> 00:15:09,721
I don't need flowers.
I need fucking painkillers!

279
00:15:09,841 --> 00:15:11,801
- My head's killing me.
- Look, listen, right.

280
00:15:11,921 --> 00:15:13,201
I think...I think I'm fall...

281
00:15:13,321 --> 00:15:15,081
Stop it.

282
00:15:15,201 --> 00:15:16,921
I think I'm falling for you.

283
00:15:17,041 --> 00:15:18,241
Do you understand?

284
00:15:18,361 --> 00:15:20,601
Yeah? I think you might be the one.

285
00:15:20,721 --> 00:15:22,361
Can I have my tablets back?

286
00:15:22,481 --> 00:15:24,721
Last night, when we fucked -

287
00:15:24,841 --> 00:15:28,521
made love, whatever -
our souls joined together.

288
00:15:28,641 --> 00:15:31,081
Yeah? And here's the big news...

289
00:15:33,161 --> 00:15:35,001
I want to be your boyfriend.

290
00:15:52,161 --> 00:15:54,601
We'll settle down, we'll get an 'ouse.
In the weekends,

291
00:15:54,721 --> 00:15:59,401
we'll go to Homebase, and in the evenings,
we'll cuddle up and watch DVDs...

292
00:15:59,521 --> 00:16:02,361
All that can be yours.

293
00:16:03,881 --> 00:16:06,201
Shall we seal the deal with a bit of sex?

294
00:16:07,281 --> 00:16:10,161
Why would I want to be your girlfriend?

295
00:16:11,801 --> 00:16:13,081
Because you're a girl.

296
00:16:13,201 --> 00:16:16,961
- It's what you lot want, isn't it?
- No.

297
00:16:17,081 --> 00:16:19,961
- Anyway. I never slept with you.
- You did...

298
00:16:20,081 --> 00:16:21,041
I think I know who I had sex with.

299
00:16:21,161 --> 00:16:25,201
Well, how come I rock up here
at the scene of the crime

300
00:16:25,321 --> 00:16:27,521
and you're still in bed?

301
00:16:27,641 --> 00:16:28,961
Because I live here.

302
00:16:29,081 --> 00:16:30,561
Because this is my bed.

303
00:16:30,681 --> 00:16:32,081
Right...

304
00:16:32,201 --> 00:16:34,241
So you fucked someone in my bed?

305
00:16:34,361 --> 00:16:36,481
I need to leave.

306
00:16:36,601 --> 00:16:39,641
Are you...are you a doctor or summat?

307
00:16:39,761 --> 00:16:40,681
I'm a trainee.

308
00:16:40,801 --> 00:16:41,761
That'll do.

309
00:16:41,881 --> 00:16:44,001
I need an expert medical opinion
on something...

310
00:16:44,121 --> 00:16:46,801
Out you come.

311
00:16:46,921 --> 00:16:49,681
Simon! Simon, dude, it's not her.

312
00:16:49,801 --> 00:16:51,961
- We need to get a move on, mate.
- What happened?

313
00:16:52,081 --> 00:16:53,441
I've just shown it to her.
It's gone black.

314
00:16:53,561 --> 00:16:55,361
It is not pretty down there, my friend.

315
00:16:55,481 --> 00:16:57,241
All right, love, I'm Rudy.

316
00:16:59,681 --> 00:17:02,201
I think I know who it might be.

317
00:17:02,321 --> 00:17:03,721
Ooh, have I had sex with her?

318
00:17:03,841 --> 00:17:05,161
Wow.

319
00:17:05,281 --> 00:17:07,481
Do you know this girl?

320
00:17:07,601 --> 00:17:10,761
- That's Amy Goodwin.
- Do you know where she lives?

321
00:17:10,881 --> 00:17:13,161
# All I really want is girls

322
00:17:14,241 --> 00:17:17,481
# And in the morning, it's girls

323
00:17:17,601 --> 00:17:21,481
# Cos in the evening, it's girls... #

324
00:17:21,601 --> 00:17:23,481
Never thought I'd say this -
I'm actually kind of bored.

325
00:17:23,601 --> 00:17:25,441
Ring the Council if you want,

326
00:17:25,561 --> 00:17:27,201
get them to hurry up
with the new probation worker.

327
00:17:27,321 --> 00:17:28,521
You're all right.

328
00:17:28,641 --> 00:17:31,201
# ...And I can always make them smile

329
00:17:31,321 --> 00:17:33,881
# From White Castle to the Nile. #

330
00:17:41,361 --> 00:17:43,161
Oh, hi.

331
00:17:43,281 --> 00:17:45,441
Not again.

332
00:17:45,561 --> 00:17:47,801
I keep randomly changing.

333
00:17:47,921 --> 00:17:49,561
Something's going on with my power.

334
00:17:49,681 --> 00:17:53,961
- And my tits, they're really sore.
- Be honest...

335
00:17:54,081 --> 00:17:56,761
is this just an excuse
for being shit at table football?

336
00:17:56,881 --> 00:17:59,361
They're fucking killing me.
Is that normal?

337
00:18:08,761 --> 00:18:10,641
So...

338
00:18:10,761 --> 00:18:13,481
This is community service, is it?

339
00:18:13,601 --> 00:18:15,841
Yeah. It's usually much more shit
than this.

340
00:18:20,281 --> 00:18:21,961
Have you got a passport?

341
00:18:22,081 --> 00:18:23,481
What?

342
00:18:23,601 --> 00:18:25,401
Why do you want my passport?

343
00:18:25,521 --> 00:18:27,081
I thought we could go away together.

344
00:18:27,201 --> 00:18:30,081
What, like on holiday?

345
00:18:30,201 --> 00:18:33,281
Yeah. I was going to go on my own, but...

346
00:18:33,401 --> 00:18:35,801
I was thinking Morocco,
somewhere like that.

347
00:18:35,921 --> 00:18:37,321
What's in Morocco?

348
00:18:37,441 --> 00:18:41,001
It's just somewhere to go.
Somewhere different.

349
00:18:43,041 --> 00:18:45,241
I've got my community service.

350
00:18:48,161 --> 00:18:51,121
It doesn't matter. Don't worry about it
if you're not interested.

351
00:18:52,921 --> 00:18:54,281
I'll think about it.

352
00:19:05,681 --> 00:19:08,361
Hang on a minute.

353
00:19:08,481 --> 00:19:10,481
Let me have a wee before we start.

354
00:19:13,681 --> 00:19:15,121
Who says romance is dead?

355
00:19:15,241 --> 00:19:18,601
- Fuck off.
- Go on then, go for your wee.

356
00:19:41,241 --> 00:19:42,401
What's it doing?

357
00:19:43,641 --> 00:19:45,521
It's not doing anything...

358
00:20:03,641 --> 00:20:06,161
I'm pregnant.

359
00:20:06,281 --> 00:20:10,601
# Ticking away
The moments that make up a dull day

360
00:20:11,681 --> 00:20:15,121
# Fritter and waste the hours
in an offhand way

361
00:20:17,401 --> 00:20:21,761
# Kicking around on a piece of ground
in your home town

362
00:20:22,881 --> 00:20:27,081
# Waiting for someone or something
to show you the way

363
00:20:28,481 --> 00:20:31,601
# Tired of lying in the sunshine

364
00:20:31,721 --> 00:20:33,801
# Staying home to watch the rain

365
00:20:33,921 --> 00:20:36,601
# You are young and life is long

366
00:20:36,721 --> 00:20:39,161
# And there is time to kill today... #

367
00:20:39,281 --> 00:20:41,601
It's really starting to hurt,
this is, mate.

368
00:20:43,481 --> 00:20:44,481
This is her flat.

369
00:20:44,601 --> 00:20:46,041
OK.

370
00:20:46,161 --> 00:20:48,001
OK, biatch.

371
00:20:48,121 --> 00:20:50,081
It is frigging payback time.

372
00:20:50,201 --> 00:20:52,201
I'm going to fuck her so hard, man,

373
00:20:52,321 --> 00:20:55,401
I am going to fuck her
into the middle of next week.

374
00:20:55,521 --> 00:20:58,041
I'm going to fuck her so hard
she's going to be like a...

375
00:21:06,041 --> 00:21:07,601
That wasn't her.

376
00:21:09,041 --> 00:21:11,361
At least, I don't think it was.

377
00:21:11,481 --> 00:21:13,401
Can't have been that drunk...

378
00:21:13,521 --> 00:21:16,001
- I think we need to leave.
- No! Whoa! No!

379
00:21:16,121 --> 00:21:18,081
We are going nowhere, pal.

380
00:21:23,041 --> 00:21:24,281
Hello...

381
00:21:24,401 --> 00:21:26,001
Amy Goodwin.

382
00:21:26,121 --> 00:21:28,001
How are...how are things?

383
00:21:28,121 --> 00:21:30,321
Did you just flash your cock at my sister?

384
00:21:30,441 --> 00:21:32,241
No.

385
00:21:34,201 --> 00:21:35,361
Yeah, I did, yeah.

386
00:21:35,481 --> 00:21:38,481
What the fuck do you think you're doing?
She's in there now, crying her eyes out!

387
00:21:38,601 --> 00:21:42,801
It was a simple misunderstanding.
I thought she was you.

388
00:21:42,921 --> 00:21:45,201
What are even you doing here?

389
00:21:45,321 --> 00:21:46,921
Flowers.

390
00:21:49,041 --> 00:21:52,001
Because you're...my flower.

391
00:21:52,121 --> 00:21:54,601
Right.

392
00:21:54,721 --> 00:21:57,121
- Look, if this is about last night...
- Yeah,

393
00:21:57,241 --> 00:21:58,681
look, I apologise for that.

394
00:21:58,801 --> 00:22:01,041
I were bang out of order.

395
00:22:01,161 --> 00:22:02,321
It shouldn't have happened.

396
00:22:02,441 --> 00:22:05,561
You're right. I hold my hands up.
I'm sorry.

397
00:22:05,681 --> 00:22:07,081
OK.

398
00:22:09,801 --> 00:22:13,441
Look, it was lovely meeting you and
everything, but you really should leave.

399
00:22:13,561 --> 00:22:15,201
Look, whoa, whoa!

400
00:22:15,321 --> 00:22:17,281
I getit.

401
00:22:17,401 --> 00:22:19,321
I getit.

402
00:22:19,441 --> 00:22:23,241
- Right? I was a prick.
- Can we just forget about it?

403
00:22:23,361 --> 00:22:26,041
I can't forget about it!
I can't forget about you.

404
00:22:27,281 --> 00:22:29,321
I want you to be my girlfriend,
Amy Goodwin.

405
00:22:29,441 --> 00:22:33,521
Can you please just fuck off or I'm gonna
have to call the police, all right?

406
00:22:33,641 --> 00:22:34,801
But, Amy...

407
00:22:34,921 --> 00:22:36,921
Amy Goodwin...

408
00:22:39,041 --> 00:22:40,801
I should do another one.

409
00:22:42,041 --> 00:22:45,121
Don't waste your money.
They'll all come out the same.

410
00:22:45,241 --> 00:22:46,681
It can't be right.

411
00:22:46,801 --> 00:22:48,561
Curtis, you're pregnant.

412
00:22:53,641 --> 00:22:54,681
You can't tell anyone, yeah?

413
00:22:54,801 --> 00:22:57,041
Don't worry, I won't.

414
00:22:59,641 --> 00:23:01,441
Who's the father?

415
00:23:01,561 --> 00:23:03,201
I don't know.

416
00:23:03,321 --> 00:23:06,081
Well, who did you have sex with
when you were a girl?

417
00:23:06,201 --> 00:23:08,161
- No-one!
- It can't be no-one's.

418
00:23:08,281 --> 00:23:10,441
What about that stuff
with the creepy coach guy?

419
00:23:10,561 --> 00:23:13,921
Not him. He didn't do anything.

420
00:23:14,041 --> 00:23:15,281
Well, who then?

421
00:23:22,841 --> 00:23:26,001
Didn't...Rudy try it on with you?

422
00:23:31,921 --> 00:23:33,441
Motherfucker...!

423
00:23:36,081 --> 00:23:38,441
You should've seen her face. She knows,
she knows what she did to me.

424
00:23:38,561 --> 00:23:39,801
We need to think of something.

425
00:23:39,921 --> 00:23:43,441
Mate, you need to think of something,
cos you're the ideas man.

426
00:23:43,561 --> 00:23:46,201
I'm wasting away down here.

427
00:23:48,761 --> 00:23:50,961
How much money have you got?

428
00:23:52,521 --> 00:23:54,761
You're going to pay her
to have sex with you?!

429
00:23:54,881 --> 00:23:57,281
Well, let's have a better idea. Eh?

430
00:23:57,401 --> 00:23:59,321
Hang on.

431
00:24:01,681 --> 00:24:03,601
- Yeah?
- Did you have sex with me?

432
00:24:03,721 --> 00:24:05,521
- What?!
- Did you have sex with the girl me

433
00:24:05,641 --> 00:24:06,601
that time in the locker room?

434
00:24:06,721 --> 00:24:09,041
- No, no, dude, I only went down on you.
- Well, then, how come I'm pregnant?!

435
00:24:09,161 --> 00:24:11,801
Seriously? Mate, congratulations!

436
00:24:11,921 --> 00:24:13,241
Simon, our Curtis is pregnant.

437
00:24:14,601 --> 00:24:17,761
Yeah, mate, he's speechless.
Listen, we're both really happy for you.

438
00:24:17,881 --> 00:24:19,281
You're saying that nothing happened?

439
00:24:19,401 --> 00:24:20,801
Dude, nowt happened.

440
00:24:20,921 --> 00:24:24,081
Mate, I've got to go, I've got more
important things to deal with right now,

441
00:24:24,201 --> 00:24:25,881
like me cock, which is falling off!

442
00:24:26,001 --> 00:24:27,921
Do one.

443
00:24:28,041 --> 00:24:29,161
What did he say?

444
00:24:29,281 --> 00:24:31,561
He's saying his cock's falling off.

445
00:24:31,681 --> 00:24:33,161
What about the baby?

446
00:24:36,041 --> 00:24:37,121
Said it wasn't him.

447
00:24:37,241 --> 00:24:39,401
Well, it must be someone. These things
don't just happen on their own!

448
00:24:39,521 --> 00:24:40,881
Yeah, I do know that!

449
00:24:59,081 --> 00:25:00,401
Oh, shit!

450
00:25:06,601 --> 00:25:08,441
Me again.

451
00:25:10,481 --> 00:25:13,881
- What are you doing?
- I've got...

452
00:25:14,001 --> 00:25:16,041
£16.76.

453
00:25:16,161 --> 00:25:18,041
- What for?
- Just forget everything,

454
00:25:18,161 --> 00:25:20,601
take the money, have sex with me.

455
00:25:20,721 --> 00:25:22,681
You think I'm a prostitute?!

456
00:25:22,801 --> 00:25:26,921
Or that you could be. If you wanted.

457
00:25:27,041 --> 00:25:29,001
Because you're so beautiful.

458
00:25:29,121 --> 00:25:32,161
- Oh, my God.
- In the name of the Father,

459
00:25:32,281 --> 00:25:34,761
please, take the money and shag me!

460
00:25:34,881 --> 00:25:36,881
- Look, I'll be really quick...
- Just get out.

461
00:25:37,001 --> 00:25:40,441
- ...and I'll clean up after myself.
- Amy, are you all right?

462
00:25:40,561 --> 00:25:43,321
Will you go away? We're just in the middle
of something, sorry.

463
00:25:43,441 --> 00:25:46,161
It's nothing, it's...just some guy.

464
00:25:47,121 --> 00:25:51,161
Some...guy that you had sex with
last night.

465
00:25:51,281 --> 00:25:53,041
- What?!
- What is he on about?

466
00:25:53,161 --> 00:25:55,081
I'm not ashamed of it, neither,

467
00:25:55,201 --> 00:25:56,521
and I'm gonna scream it
from the frigging rooftops.

468
00:25:56,641 --> 00:26:00,401
I had sex with Amy Goodwin last night,
and she was amazing.

469
00:26:00,521 --> 00:26:01,481
You were amazing.

470
00:26:01,601 --> 00:26:04,041
We did not have sex.

471
00:26:04,161 --> 00:26:06,001
We just kissed, you twat!

472
00:26:06,121 --> 00:26:07,841
You kissed him?!

473
00:26:07,961 --> 00:26:09,201
OK, that does sound worse than it is.

474
00:26:09,321 --> 00:26:11,921
Whoa, sorry, we didn't have sex?

475
00:26:12,041 --> 00:26:14,121
- So, what, you're back into guys now?
- I was drunk.

476
00:26:14,241 --> 00:26:16,601
Weird. I seem to remember that
being the excuse last time.

477
00:26:16,721 --> 00:26:18,481
Can we talk about this later?

478
00:26:18,601 --> 00:26:22,281
Whoa, I'm sorry to interrupt this
little...thing you've got going on here,

479
00:26:22,401 --> 00:26:25,121
but are you absolutely sure
we didn't have sex?

480
00:26:25,241 --> 00:26:27,361
Yes. So, can you fuck off?

481
00:26:27,481 --> 00:26:30,161
Oh, ohhh, God!

482
00:26:30,281 --> 00:26:31,361
Ohh.

483
00:26:31,481 --> 00:26:37,161
Oh, er... Do apologise to your sister
for me, won't you? You know.

484
00:26:37,281 --> 00:26:40,521
Maybe come back and show her again
when it's better or summat.

485
00:26:40,641 --> 00:26:42,681
Nice one.

486
00:26:52,241 --> 00:26:53,721
It's not her, mate.

487
00:26:53,841 --> 00:26:55,841
It's gotta be Collarbones - she's the one.

488
00:26:55,961 --> 00:26:58,201
We should go back to the house
where the party was.

489
00:26:58,321 --> 00:26:59,521
Someone's got to know who she is.

490
00:26:59,641 --> 00:27:00,841
Come on, let's go.

491
00:27:02,801 --> 00:27:06,161
Oh, fuck.

492
00:27:28,361 --> 00:27:32,401
So...you're wanking off as a guy...

493
00:27:33,601 --> 00:27:39,281
...and then swapping and doing it again...
as a girl?

494
00:27:40,721 --> 00:27:42,041
Uh-huh.

495
00:27:42,161 --> 00:27:44,041
Why?

496
00:27:45,561 --> 00:27:46,801
It passed the time.

497
00:27:46,921 --> 00:27:49,001
Ugh.

498
00:27:50,281 --> 00:27:52,841
I think I used the same...
the same tissue to...

499
00:27:55,521 --> 00:27:57,521
...to wipe up.

500
00:27:59,201 --> 00:28:01,281
Both times.

501
00:28:01,401 --> 00:28:02,681
That is so fucking rank.

502
00:28:02,801 --> 00:28:04,521
Thanks for the sympathy, yeah?

503
00:28:06,721 --> 00:28:08,041
You got a sec?

504
00:28:18,881 --> 00:28:20,201
Are you pregnant?

505
00:28:20,321 --> 00:28:21,601
No.

506
00:28:21,721 --> 00:28:25,041
Well, there's this thing in the toilet,
a pee stick thing.

507
00:28:25,161 --> 00:28:26,961
I don't know what you're talking about.

508
00:28:28,441 --> 00:28:31,041
Right. OK.

509
00:28:31,161 --> 00:28:32,401
It doesn't matter.

510
00:28:42,041 --> 00:28:44,081
This is really starting to piss me off.

511
00:28:44,201 --> 00:28:46,841
Then just swap back,
just stop moaning about it.

512
00:28:57,921 --> 00:28:59,841
I can't switch back!

513
00:28:59,961 --> 00:29:02,081
You're kidding me.

514
00:29:10,081 --> 00:29:11,321
I'm stuck!

515
00:29:22,281 --> 00:29:23,441
Argh!

516
00:29:38,681 --> 00:29:40,601
Exposing yourself...

517
00:29:40,721 --> 00:29:43,561
to a 12-year-old girl.

518
00:29:43,681 --> 00:29:46,361
It were a simple misunderstanding.
Anyone could've done that.

519
00:29:46,481 --> 00:29:47,961
Now your penis is going to fall off.

520
00:29:48,081 --> 00:29:51,881
What did I say to you? I said, didn't I,
if you go around, acting like an idiot,

521
00:29:52,001 --> 00:29:54,521
sexing up all these girls,
you are gonna catch something.

522
00:29:54,641 --> 00:29:58,241
I thought I might get the clap
or one or two crabs here and there.

523
00:29:58,361 --> 00:30:00,481
I weren't expecting this.
It's rotting away!

524
00:30:00,601 --> 00:30:05,001
Well, maybe if you treat her right instead
of all the macho bollocks all the time...

525
00:30:05,121 --> 00:30:06,801
- Here we go.
- Just face it,

526
00:30:06,921 --> 00:30:10,681
the only reason, mate,
you treat girls like crap

527
00:30:10,801 --> 00:30:12,481
is because you're scared.

528
00:30:12,601 --> 00:30:16,561
You're scared that if you let ‘em in,
and they get to know the real you,

529
00:30:16,681 --> 00:30:18,401
you know, then they might reject you.

530
00:30:18,521 --> 00:30:21,601
So you reject them,
before they get a chance.

531
00:30:21,721 --> 00:30:23,961
You never let your guard down.

532
00:30:24,081 --> 00:30:26,241
You are...

533
00:30:26,361 --> 00:30:28,401
pathetic.

534
00:30:28,521 --> 00:30:30,641
But now your todge is gonna fall off,
SO...

535
00:30:30,761 --> 00:30:34,721
Just shut the fuck up, man!

536
00:30:34,841 --> 00:30:37,161
Are you happy now?

537
00:30:38,441 --> 00:30:40,561
Yeah, I'm scared.

538
00:30:42,961 --> 00:30:47,201
I'm never gonna have sex again
and I'm gonna look like a freak.

539
00:30:48,641 --> 00:30:51,681
Yeah, well, I can't live with you
like this - you're gonna do my head in.

540
00:30:55,881 --> 00:30:57,361
I might have an idea.

541
00:30:59,561 --> 00:31:01,961
I thought I'd cook you some dinner
tonight.

542
00:31:03,721 --> 00:31:05,201
Fishfingers, nothing special.

543
00:31:05,321 --> 00:31:07,281
Are you pregnant?

544
00:31:07,401 --> 00:31:08,361
What?

545
00:31:08,481 --> 00:31:09,761
It's OK.

546
00:31:09,881 --> 00:31:13,201
I know it's not what either of us
planned. I just want to say that...

547
00:31:13,321 --> 00:31:15,801
I'm there for you, if you, you know...

548
00:31:15,921 --> 00:31:16,961
I'm not pregnant.

549
00:31:18,241 --> 00:31:21,121
- I saw the pregnancy test in the toilet.
- It's not mine.

550
00:31:21,241 --> 00:31:22,681
Well, Alisha says it's not hers,
so whose is it?

551
00:31:22,801 --> 00:31:24,201
I don't know!

552
00:31:24,321 --> 00:31:27,121
You can tell me. Just...tell me the truth.

553
00:31:27,241 --> 00:31:28,361
I am!

554
00:31:28,481 --> 00:31:30,841
It's not mine. I'm not pregnant, you dick.

555
00:31:30,961 --> 00:31:32,921
Right.

556
00:31:33,041 --> 00:31:34,881
So you can stop shitting yourself.

557
00:31:35,001 --> 00:31:37,081
What? It's fine, I wasn't worried.

558
00:31:37,201 --> 00:31:38,881
Nah, course you weren't.

559
00:31:39,001 --> 00:31:41,201
All right, maybe I was shitting myself
a little bit.

560
00:31:41,321 --> 00:31:43,521
Oh, it's work. I'd better get this.

561
00:31:44,961 --> 00:31:46,321
Yeah?

562
00:31:46,441 --> 00:31:47,561
Right.

563
00:31:49,801 --> 00:31:51,841
What, you found it?

564
00:31:53,641 --> 00:31:54,921
And where is it now?

565
00:31:58,361 --> 00:32:00,721
Yeah, yeah, I'm still here.

566
00:32:00,841 --> 00:32:03,641
Um...yeah, I want it.

567
00:32:03,761 --> 00:32:05,121
I'll be right there.

568
00:32:11,361 --> 00:32:12,561
Something's come up.

569
00:32:12,681 --> 00:32:13,961
I need to get going.

570
00:32:14,081 --> 00:32:16,361
It's fine, don't worry about it.

571
00:32:17,401 --> 00:32:18,601
I'm really sorry.

572
00:32:37,121 --> 00:32:38,281
Make it quick.

573
00:32:38,401 --> 00:32:41,961
Oh, I see - you're a watcher.
Well, unlucky, cos I need a shit.

574
00:32:55,121 --> 00:32:57,521
- Oh!
- Are you all right?

575
00:32:57,641 --> 00:33:01,521
Just a bit of a messy one, mate.
You're better off out there.

576
00:33:01,641 --> 00:33:04,961
Swear you'll come back for me.

577
00:33:06,001 --> 00:33:08,641
Yep. Look, I promise.

578
00:33:08,761 --> 00:33:11,001
Thanks for doing this, man.

579
00:33:11,121 --> 00:33:12,401
Good luck, yeah?

580
00:33:14,921 --> 00:33:16,401
Hiya.

581
00:33:24,041 --> 00:33:29,241
I'm gonna at least need some antibacterial
hand scrub or a hand towel. It's disqgus...

582
00:33:50,721 --> 00:33:54,161
Just call me fucking Harry Houdini.

583
00:33:54,281 --> 00:33:55,961
I think I know where she might be.

584
00:33:56,081 --> 00:33:58,681
What?

585
00:33:58,801 --> 00:34:01,161
What's that? Is that the best you've got?

586
00:34:01,281 --> 00:34:04,841
The future of my cock depends
on the slim chance

587
00:34:04,961 --> 00:34:08,001
that she might be at some random
nightclub? Is that what you're saying?

588
00:34:08,121 --> 00:34:09,281
Yes.

589
00:34:09,401 --> 00:34:11,361
Well, let's get going, then!

590
00:34:19,521 --> 00:34:20,841
Shit.

591
00:34:20,961 --> 00:34:22,361
Yeah.

592
00:34:22,481 --> 00:34:24,161
I know.

593
00:34:24,281 --> 00:34:25,641
What are you gonna do?

594
00:34:25,761 --> 00:34:26,961
I've tried everything.

595
00:34:27,081 --> 00:34:28,321
I'm stuck.

596
00:34:30,281 --> 00:34:32,041
So, what happens to Curtis?

597
00:34:32,161 --> 00:34:33,481
I'm still here!

598
00:34:35,521 --> 00:34:38,161
So...what shall we call you?

599
00:34:38,281 --> 00:34:40,601
Like...Melissa or...?

600
00:34:40,721 --> 00:34:42,681
I don't give a shit!

601
00:34:42,801 --> 00:34:44,161
I'm gonna have a baby.

602
00:34:44,281 --> 00:34:46,641
- That isn't right.
- Kelly...

603
00:34:46,761 --> 00:34:47,761
I'm sorry.

604
00:34:47,881 --> 00:34:50,161
You can't have a baby where the mum's
a man who turns into a woman.

605
00:34:54,921 --> 00:34:56,401
There are options, you know.

606
00:35:00,881 --> 00:35:02,401
I'll see you tomorrow.

607
00:35:29,841 --> 00:35:31,441
It's in the boot.

608
00:35:35,601 --> 00:35:38,561
Are you gonna ask me where I found it?

609
00:35:38,681 --> 00:35:40,161
What?

610
00:35:40,281 --> 00:35:45,121
You know something, after all this hassle,
I thought you'd be a little more excited.

611
00:35:45,241 --> 00:35:47,321
It's complicated.

612
00:35:47,441 --> 00:35:48,921
You do still want it, don't you?

613
00:35:49,041 --> 00:35:51,641
I mean, cos if you don't,
I can always find another buyer.

614
00:35:54,561 --> 00:35:55,721
Yeah.

615
00:35:55,841 --> 00:35:57,641
Yeah, I do want it.

616
00:36:29,721 --> 00:36:31,241
Don't worry, I'm not gonna hurt you.

617
00:36:31,361 --> 00:36:33,681
I've just come to take your power.

618
00:37:00,521 --> 00:37:01,521
Where is she, man?

619
00:37:01,641 --> 00:37:02,721
We should split up.

620
00:37:02,841 --> 00:37:08,721
Oh, that is a good idea. Listen, look for
a girl with beautiful collarbones, mate.

621
00:37:08,841 --> 00:37:11,721
All right? Good lad.

622
00:37:39,521 --> 00:37:40,961
Jesus.

623
00:37:41,081 --> 00:37:43,001
Argh! Argh!

624
00:37:43,121 --> 00:37:46,321
- Whoa. Oh, it's great to see you
- You wanker!

625
00:37:46,441 --> 00:37:50,321
Listen, please, help me out.
Just shag me and make me better.

626
00:37:50,441 --> 00:37:52,321
So, what, you think this is
what this is all about?

627
00:37:52,441 --> 00:37:53,681
I just want another fuck,
and everything will go back to normal?

628
00:37:53,801 --> 00:37:56,041
I don't know! I don't know what you want.

629
00:37:56,161 --> 00:37:57,801
I just didn't want to be treated
like shit.

630
00:37:57,921 --> 00:38:02,161
Guys like you, you shit on girls
and you just walk away, no harm done.

631
00:38:02,281 --> 00:38:03,961
You make me sick.

632
00:38:04,081 --> 00:38:07,961
Well, guess what?
Now your dick's gonna fall off.

633
00:38:08,081 --> 00:38:09,481
And I'm glad.

634
00:38:09,601 --> 00:38:13,721
I'm hanging by a thread.
I am hanging by a thread! Help me out!

635
00:38:13,841 --> 00:38:15,081
Please help me.

636
00:38:15,201 --> 00:38:18,321
Fuck! Fuck's sake! My penis!

637
00:38:19,841 --> 00:38:22,121
Jesus Christ! Get out the way, move.

638
00:38:31,761 --> 00:38:33,201
Get off the stage, you wanker.

639
00:38:33,321 --> 00:38:36,161
Sorry to interrupt your party. Um...

640
00:38:36,281 --> 00:38:38,521
There's just something I need to say.

641
00:38:38,641 --> 00:38:41,001
- Fuck off!
- Hmm. I just want to say,

642
00:38:41,121 --> 00:38:43,441
to all the girls
I might have had sex with...

643
00:38:43,561 --> 00:38:46,001
and treated like shit,

644
00:38:46,121 --> 00:38:47,961
I am sorry.

645
00:38:48,081 --> 00:38:50,041
I'm sorry.

646
00:38:50,161 --> 00:38:51,761
I don't know why I do it.

647
00:38:52,801 --> 00:38:55,361
Maybe I am...scared.

648
00:38:55,481 --> 00:38:59,321
I just... I'm scared
that if you get to know me,

649
00:38:59,441 --> 00:39:04,321
when I'm not pissed
and fucking showing off, being a dick,

650
00:39:04,441 --> 00:39:07,121
you'll think I'm nothing...

651
00:39:07,241 --> 00:39:08,681
special.

652
00:39:11,761 --> 00:39:13,841
I'm just a twat with a big mouth.

653
00:39:13,961 --> 00:39:14,881
Um...

654
00:39:15,001 --> 00:39:18,041
I never meant to hurt anyone.

655
00:39:18,161 --> 00:39:20,241
I'm sorry.

656
00:39:22,241 --> 00:39:24,121
Thanks, that's all I have to say.

657
00:39:24,241 --> 00:39:27,841
- Fuck off, then!
- Shut up, you northern monkey!

658
00:39:53,681 --> 00:39:56,961
- You look like you meant that.
- I did. I did.

659
00:39:57,081 --> 00:39:58,721
You ever do this to anyone else...

660
00:39:58,841 --> 00:40:03,801
I swear! I swear to God, I'll never do it
again. Just make me better, please.

661
00:40:06,681 --> 00:40:10,121
Is that...? It's going back to normal?
It's going back to normal!

662
00:40:10,241 --> 00:40:13,401
- Thank you so much!
- Anyway, nice knowing you.

663
00:40:13,521 --> 00:40:17,481
No, wait... I'm sorry, I didn't...

664
00:40:17,601 --> 00:40:19,521
I never got your name.

665
00:40:19,641 --> 00:40:20,921
I'm Rudy.

666
00:40:21,041 --> 00:40:22,961
Leah.

667
00:40:26,081 --> 00:40:28,241
You seem like a really nice girl.

668
00:40:30,361 --> 00:40:32,441
Do you want to...

669
00:40:32,561 --> 00:40:35,281
Do you want to go for a drink?

670
00:40:35,401 --> 00:40:36,721
Oooh!

671
00:40:36,841 --> 00:40:40,881
So you want to get me drunk
and fuck me again, is that it?

672
00:40:41,001 --> 00:40:43,321
That's not what it is.

673
00:40:43,441 --> 00:40:44,961
It's not.

674
00:40:46,721 --> 00:40:48,361
See you later.

675
00:41:16,321 --> 00:41:19,041
This is Seth, leave a message.

676
00:41:19,161 --> 00:41:22,121
It's me.
I just wanted to say about Morocco.

677
00:41:22,241 --> 00:41:25,721
I don't know why I didn't say yeah
straight away. I'm a dick.

678
00:41:25,841 --> 00:41:29,281
It's just that no-one's ever asked me
to go on holiday with them before.

679
00:41:29,401 --> 00:41:33,161
Anyway, yeah,
so just give me a call later.

680
00:41:34,881 --> 00:41:36,561
I miss ya.

681
00:42:03,281 --> 00:42:05,921
- Where's Curtis?
- I don't know.

682
00:42:06,041 --> 00:42:08,321
I think he's got morning sickness.

683
00:42:08,441 --> 00:42:10,721
He should eat ginger biscuits.

684
00:42:10,841 --> 00:42:14,841
Apparently it helps alleviate the nausea.

685
00:42:14,961 --> 00:42:19,801
Take this down.
Here you are, check it out.

686
00:42:19,921 --> 00:42:21,961
Check that bastard out, it's immaculate!

687
00:42:22,081 --> 00:42:24,441
- I'm very happy for you.
- Thank you.

688
00:42:24,561 --> 00:42:26,521
And, you know, thank you.

689
00:42:26,641 --> 00:42:29,881
Your boyfriend helped save my cock,
did you know that?

690
00:42:30,001 --> 00:42:31,161
I'm so proud

691
00:42:31,281 --> 00:42:32,481
Yeah, and so you bloody should be.

692
00:42:32,601 --> 00:42:34,681
Do you know what, man?
It actually made me wonder.

693
00:42:34,801 --> 00:42:38,721
Cos you can't live life for yourself.
You've got to think about other people.

694
00:42:38,841 --> 00:42:40,521
Like that song, you know...

695
00:42:40,641 --> 00:42:42,881
High School Musical,

696
00:42:43,001 --> 00:42:44,201
We're All In This Together?

697
00:42:44,321 --> 00:42:48,201
I never understood that song,
until now, mate. And...

698
00:42:49,281 --> 00:42:50,681
Oh, mate!

699
00:42:50,801 --> 00:42:51,801
I'm sorry.

700
00:42:51,921 --> 00:42:54,201
I completely forgot, mate.

701
00:42:54,321 --> 00:42:56,761
I'm...I'm sorry!

702
00:42:56,881 --> 00:43:01,281
Don't be like that. Don't, mate.
I would've remembered you eventually.

703
00:43:01,401 --> 00:43:02,481
Don't... Fuck!

704
00:43:02,601 --> 00:43:04,241
Dude! Come here, mate.

705
00:43:04,361 --> 00:43:05,961
Sorry. I'm sorry!

706
00:43:13,801 --> 00:43:15,561
And how can I help you today?

707
00:43:15,681 --> 00:43:18,721
It's me, Curtis.

708
00:43:20,281 --> 00:43:21,561
Right.

709
00:43:21,681 --> 00:43:23,481
Suits you.

710
00:43:24,561 --> 00:43:25,481
I'm stuck.

711
00:43:25,601 --> 00:43:27,441
I can't switch back.

712
00:43:27,561 --> 00:43:29,561
I need you to take my power.

713
00:43:32,961 --> 00:43:34,401
I can help you.

714
00:43:36,081 --> 00:43:38,481
- But I need you to do something for me.
- Whatever.

715
00:43:38,601 --> 00:43:41,361
-I'll do it.
- I've got another power.

716
00:43:41,481 --> 00:43:44,441
I need to put itin you
and you'll have to use it for me.

717
00:43:44,561 --> 00:43:46,321
What power?

718
00:43:47,801 --> 00:43:50,121
The power to bring people back
from the dead.

719
00:43:50,241 --> 00:43:52,361
Like who?

720
00:43:52,481 --> 00:43:53,481
A girl.

721
00:43:55,521 --> 00:43:57,641
I'm gonna need more than that.

722
00:44:00,441 --> 00:44:02,161
My dead girlfriend.

723
00:44:03,281 --> 00:44:05,841
Ah, nah. Kelly's a mate.
I can't do that to her.

724
00:44:05,961 --> 00:44:07,721
It isn't like that.

725
00:44:07,841 --> 00:44:09,921
I need to do this.

726
00:44:12,041 --> 00:44:14,841
We can help each other out.

727
00:44:24,641 --> 00:44:25,961
OK.

728
00:45:02,921 --> 00:45:05,841
Let's go resurrect my dead girlfriend.

729
00:45:05,961 --> 00:45:07,721
What the fuck is going on?

730
00:45:07,841 --> 00:45:08,961
Why are you dumping me?

731
00:45:09,081 --> 00:45:10,001
Shannon's alive.

732
00:45:10,121 --> 00:45:13,401
Cheerleaders! Sweet!

733
00:45:13,521 --> 00:45:15,001
He's dead.

734
00:45:15,121 --> 00:45:16,401
Mr Miggles got hit by a car,

735
00:45:16,521 --> 00:45:18,801
- but I brought him back to life.
- Miggles!

736
00:45:18,921 --> 00:45:19,961
He attacked me.

737
00:45:20,081 --> 00:45:22,921
They think you're a zombie.
They're coming to kill you.

738
00:45:23,041 --> 00:45:27,881
We smash their skulls to destroy
their brains. We kill them all.

739
00:45:28,001 --> 00:45:30,561
We're really not bad kids.

740
00:45:30,681 --> 00:45:33,001
Yeah.

741
00:45:33,025 --> 00:45:35,025
http://hiqve.com/