1 00:00:01,479 --> 00:00:04,218 ‐ Look, I don't want to hurt Archer. 2 00:00:04,252 --> 00:00:05,420 all: Oh. ‐ Oh, thank God. 3 00:00:05,454 --> 00:00:07,157 ‐ But I will. Pam: God damn it. 4 00:00:07,191 --> 00:00:08,661 ‐ Every hour on the hour. 5 00:00:08,694 --> 00:00:12,034 That's company policy, and I am a stickler. 6 00:00:12,067 --> 00:00:14,706 ‐ A stickler? Is that like the one up your ass‐ler? 7 00:00:14,740 --> 00:00:16,577 ‐ Didn't quite get there. 8 00:00:16,610 --> 00:00:17,579 Fabian: It's simple, really: 9 00:00:17,612 --> 00:00:20,752 give me the memory stick or Archer dies. 10 00:00:20,785 --> 00:00:22,221 [all gasp] ‐ Damn. 11 00:00:22,254 --> 00:00:23,724 Should've saved the stick thing for that one. 12 00:00:23,758 --> 00:00:25,662 ‐ Look, we obviously want Archer back, but we‐‐ 13 00:00:25,695 --> 00:00:26,730 ‐ We'll do it. 14 00:00:26,764 --> 00:00:28,568 ‐ But where is Ms. Archer? 15 00:00:28,601 --> 00:00:30,337 I'd like confirmation from her. 16 00:00:30,370 --> 00:00:32,742 ‐ She's distraught, but she deputized me 17 00:00:32,776 --> 00:00:34,278 to make decisions on her behalf. 18 00:00:34,312 --> 00:00:35,615 ‐ Wait, Malory never‐‐ 19 00:00:35,648 --> 00:00:37,218 ‐ And one of those decisions is shut up. 20 00:00:37,251 --> 00:00:39,222 Fabian: And just for a bit of added incentive, know 21 00:00:39,255 --> 00:00:42,394 I'll be beating Archer until the exchange takes place. 22 00:00:42,428 --> 00:00:43,831 Ta, then. 23 00:00:43,864 --> 00:00:45,835 ‐ So that's it? We're really gonna give him 24 00:00:45,868 --> 00:00:47,839 the blueprints to an energy source 25 00:00:47,872 --> 00:00:50,845 that could kill a billion people if he weaponized it? 26 00:00:50,878 --> 00:00:52,782 ‐ And why exactly are you here? 27 00:00:52,816 --> 00:00:54,151 ‐ She's here to assess 28 00:00:54,185 --> 00:00:56,155 the environmental impact of that gadget. 29 00:00:56,189 --> 00:00:58,260 ‐ So the detonation of a nuclear fusion weapon, 30 00:00:58,293 --> 00:00:59,428 that would be bad? 31 00:00:59,462 --> 00:01:00,798 ‐ Well, yes. 32 00:01:00,832 --> 00:01:02,401 ‐ If only you'd gotten here sooner. 33 00:01:02,434 --> 00:01:04,472 ‐ Where in the world is Malory anyway? 34 00:01:04,506 --> 00:01:05,642 ‐ Oh. So we have to reveal 35 00:01:05,675 --> 00:01:07,244 every part of our intricate plan 36 00:01:07,278 --> 00:01:08,814 so you can blab it everywhere? 37 00:01:08,848 --> 00:01:09,750 ‐ We don't know. 38 00:01:09,783 --> 00:01:12,822 ‐ Can we please coordinate lies in advance? 39 00:01:12,856 --> 00:01:16,362 I'm flailing out here like a one‐armed milker on meth. 40 00:01:17,632 --> 00:01:19,836 Fabian: Pardon our dust. Moving in. 41 00:01:19,870 --> 00:01:21,573 Expand or die you know, 42 00:01:21,607 --> 00:01:24,312 although the second is really your only option here. 43 00:01:24,345 --> 00:01:26,684 ‐ Hey, I'm handcuffed and he just threatened to kill me. 44 00:01:26,717 --> 00:01:29,790 Maybe you could, I don't know, call the police. 45 00:01:29,823 --> 00:01:33,363 I‐I get it, don't wanna jeopardize this lucrative job 46 00:01:33,396 --> 00:01:35,768 of picking stuff up and later putting it back down. 47 00:01:35,802 --> 00:01:37,237 mover: Check your privilege. 48 00:01:37,271 --> 00:01:38,641 ‐ I'll never do that and you know it. 49 00:01:38,674 --> 00:01:40,745 ‐ Welcome to your accommodations. 50 00:01:40,778 --> 00:01:44,285 I trust you'll be comfortable for four seconds. 51 00:01:44,318 --> 00:01:45,655 Which are over. 52 00:01:45,688 --> 00:01:47,257 ‐ That would sound a lot more sinister if 53 00:01:47,291 --> 00:01:49,663 you weren't standing next to a giant tub of jelly beans. 54 00:01:49,696 --> 00:01:51,567 It's like if "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" 55 00:01:51,600 --> 00:01:54,238 were exactly as creepy as it currently is. 56 00:01:54,271 --> 00:01:56,543 ‐ Hey, bud. What'd the five fingers say to Archer? 57 00:01:56,577 --> 00:01:58,313 ‐ Uh, nice to see you? 58 00:01:58,346 --> 00:02:00,585 [grunts] ‐ No, they didn't say that. 59 00:02:00,618 --> 00:02:02,187 They don't have mouths. 60 00:02:02,221 --> 00:02:04,258 Man, this doesn't seem fair, does it? 61 00:02:09,603 --> 00:02:12,141 ‐ Hey, Other Barry, could I talk to Barry? 62 00:02:12,174 --> 00:02:14,278 ‐ Sure. You mind if I just keep laying 'em in here? 63 00:02:14,312 --> 00:02:16,750 ‐ Yes. ‐ I thought so. 64 00:02:17,318 --> 00:02:19,322 ‐ Hey, bud. Barry here. 65 00:02:19,355 --> 00:02:21,593 Fabian tried to hack my central processor 66 00:02:21,627 --> 00:02:23,698 and I guess he kind of unleashed Other Barry. 67 00:02:23,731 --> 00:02:25,902 And, man, does Other Barry not like you. 68 00:02:25,935 --> 00:02:27,539 I really do consider you 69 00:02:27,572 --> 00:02:29,776 one of my best friends despite all this. 70 00:02:32,481 --> 00:02:35,521 Yeah, I'd cry if I had access to my tear ducts right now, 71 00:02:35,555 --> 00:02:37,324 but I got no control, bud. 72 00:02:37,358 --> 00:02:39,395 Other Barry is running the show. 73 00:02:41,567 --> 00:02:43,704 ‐ Don't worry, I'll do it for both of us. 74 00:02:46,677 --> 00:02:49,716 [main title theme] 75 00:02:49,750 --> 00:02:56,764 ♪ ♪ 76 00:03:24,953 --> 00:03:27,391 ‐ And again, I couldn't be sorrier about all this. 77 00:03:27,424 --> 00:03:28,627 ‐ You could try. 78 00:03:28,661 --> 00:03:30,932 ‐ See you in and hour, then. ‐ Oh, you will. 79 00:03:30,965 --> 00:03:33,002 And I've got everything I need right here. 80 00:03:33,036 --> 00:03:35,575 Also, I'm probably severely concussed 81 00:03:35,608 --> 00:03:37,377 which is why I'm talking to myself. 82 00:03:37,411 --> 00:03:39,750 Right, Archer? Right, other Archer. 83 00:03:39,783 --> 00:03:41,887 No, no, no. Let's not start that shit. 84 00:03:41,920 --> 00:03:44,559 ‐ So what is the maximum mass of a star 85 00:03:44,593 --> 00:03:46,462 that will not go supernova? 86 00:03:46,497 --> 00:03:48,400 ‐ Uh‐‐ooh, Estelle Getty. 87 00:03:48,433 --> 00:03:49,936 I got a good feeling about that one. 88 00:03:49,970 --> 00:03:51,740 ‐ This is so much better than watching my a ocelot 89 00:03:51,774 --> 00:03:53,577 eat endangered birds. 90 00:03:53,611 --> 00:03:55,280 ‐ So how's this going? 91 00:03:55,313 --> 00:03:57,418 ‐ Oh, about like you'd expect. ‐ Next question. 92 00:03:57,451 --> 00:03:58,854 Who is your favorite Golden Girl? 93 00:03:58,888 --> 00:04:00,758 ‐ Uh, Chandradeskar limit. 94 00:04:00,792 --> 00:04:02,662 ‐ That isn't‐‐wait a second. 95 00:04:02,695 --> 00:04:03,998 ‐ Look, we need to figure out where Archer is 96 00:04:04,031 --> 00:04:05,467 and I don't think this is helping. 97 00:04:05,501 --> 00:04:06,804 Isn't there anything in Singapore 98 00:04:06,837 --> 00:04:08,473 that you picked up other than gonorrhea? 99 00:04:08,507 --> 00:04:11,747 ‐ Ugh, poor people disease. I'm strictly spirochetes. 100 00:04:11,780 --> 00:04:13,717 ‐ Wait. Colt, didn't we find, like, a thing 101 00:04:13,751 --> 00:04:15,053 in your old apartment? ‐ Oh, yeah. 102 00:04:15,086 --> 00:04:17,725 I meant to analyze this. ‐ But you were too busy 103 00:04:17,759 --> 00:04:19,696 exploring the golden age of television? 104 00:04:19,729 --> 00:04:21,700 ‐ Oh, so I'm supposed to keep track of everything 105 00:04:21,733 --> 00:04:22,969 I'm supposed to be doing? 106 00:04:23,002 --> 00:04:25,407 [sarcastically] Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. 107 00:04:25,440 --> 00:04:26,710 If I apply power, 108 00:04:26,743 --> 00:04:28,714 I should be able to get a handle on what it does. 109 00:04:28,747 --> 00:04:30,016 [intense feedback screeches] all: Ah! 110 00:04:30,050 --> 00:04:31,419 ‐ Come on. ‐ Jesus. 111 00:04:31,452 --> 00:04:32,989 Did we just contact the monolith? 112 00:04:33,022 --> 00:04:35,293 ‐ That was a radio signal! I'll try to trace it. 113 00:04:35,327 --> 00:04:37,765 ‐ It's a back door into the IIA mainframe. 114 00:04:37,799 --> 00:04:39,435 I think I built the mainframe. 115 00:04:39,468 --> 00:04:41,439 [all gasp] ‐ Hey, guys, 116 00:04:41,472 --> 00:04:44,044 I think it's possible I wasn't a very good person. 117 00:04:44,078 --> 00:04:46,583 ‐ Well, what's important is that you're a good guy now. 118 00:04:46,617 --> 00:04:48,988 ‐ And all it took was destroying 8% of your brain. 119 00:04:49,021 --> 00:04:50,591 ‐ [chuckles] Thank you. Wait, what? 120 00:04:50,625 --> 00:04:52,027 ‐ Oh, did I not tell you that? 121 00:04:52,060 --> 00:04:55,902 Yeah. It's like... [zaps] Gone. Totally destroyed. 122 00:04:55,935 --> 00:04:59,576 ‐ Well, lookee here. You running, squirrel meat? 123 00:04:59,609 --> 00:05:02,481 ‐ No, just heading to lunch with all the stuff 124 00:05:02,515 --> 00:05:03,984 I ever brought here. 125 00:05:04,018 --> 00:05:05,187 [sighs] Fine, I was leaving. 126 00:05:05,220 --> 00:05:08,092 Since we're about to be responsible for the apocalypse, 127 00:05:08,126 --> 00:05:10,898 if I leave now, maybe I won't end up in a bone cage 128 00:05:10,932 --> 00:05:13,537 where I'm slowly revenge‐eaten by mutants. 129 00:05:13,571 --> 00:05:15,741 ‐ Okay, weirdo. That's why I'm staying. 130 00:05:15,775 --> 00:05:17,612 ‐ [sighs]. No, Ray, we need you. 131 00:05:17,645 --> 00:05:20,383 You were an employee of IIA. ‐ I'm temp to perm! 132 00:05:20,417 --> 00:05:21,954 ‐ This is just HR talking here, 133 00:05:21,987 --> 00:05:23,824 but I know that that would give you limited access 134 00:05:23,858 --> 00:05:26,462 to their system and a general sense of how it's structured. 135 00:05:26,497 --> 00:05:28,767 ‐ Dukes. Damn your HR acumen. 136 00:05:28,801 --> 00:05:30,070 [sighs] So what's the plan here? 137 00:05:30,103 --> 00:05:31,405 ‐ We go get Archer. 138 00:05:31,439 --> 00:05:32,542 [all gasp] ‐ That's the plan? 139 00:05:32,575 --> 00:05:36,415 ‐ Yeah. I mean, a frontal assault on an IIA compound? 140 00:05:36,449 --> 00:05:38,119 ‐ I don't know. They seem pretty good. 141 00:05:38,152 --> 00:05:41,459 I mean, sure, we're gonna kick their asses, but, like, are we? 142 00:05:41,493 --> 00:05:43,764 ‐ So, what? A sternly worded letter? 143 00:05:43,797 --> 00:05:44,799 ‐ I got my pen, 144 00:05:44,833 --> 00:05:46,035 and it's mightier than a sword 145 00:05:46,068 --> 00:05:47,471 full of word poison. 146 00:05:47,505 --> 00:05:49,074 ‐ Look at you, about to roll over 147 00:05:49,108 --> 00:05:52,582 to these boring overlords. Where's your self‐respect? 148 00:05:52,615 --> 00:05:55,387 You used to be the best in the world at this! 149 00:05:55,420 --> 00:05:57,157 [inspiring music] ‐ Jesus, neck bones is right. 150 00:05:57,191 --> 00:05:59,796 ‐ God damn it, I am in. ‐ Let's do this. 151 00:05:59,829 --> 00:06:02,367 ‐ Wait, you guys, I was being sarcastic. 152 00:06:02,401 --> 00:06:04,673 You all suck and you always have. 153 00:06:04,706 --> 00:06:06,944 Note to self: work on voice tone. 154 00:06:06,977 --> 00:06:09,849 Invisible tape recorder off. Boop. 155 00:06:10,651 --> 00:06:13,557 ‐ Oh, come on, we're playing hide and seek now? 156 00:06:13,591 --> 00:06:16,563 Red Rover, red Rover, let Archer‐‐ 157 00:06:16,597 --> 00:06:18,667 shit, wait, that's the wrong game. 158 00:06:19,134 --> 00:06:20,771 [laser charging] 159 00:06:20,805 --> 00:06:22,809 ‐ [shouts] 160 00:06:24,011 --> 00:06:25,948 ‐ So, uh, this was the plan, bud? 161 00:06:25,982 --> 00:06:28,554 ‐ The coffee pot was to breach your exterior, 162 00:06:28,587 --> 00:06:31,593 the staples were to, um, uh, jam your gears. 163 00:06:31,627 --> 00:06:34,599 ‐ Jam my gears? I have frictionless bearings. 164 00:06:34,633 --> 00:06:36,870 I'm a wonder of modern technology, 165 00:06:36,904 --> 00:06:38,674 not a freaking cuckoo clock. 166 00:06:38,707 --> 00:06:40,410 Come on. ‐ Okay, I get it. 167 00:06:40,443 --> 00:06:42,080 ‐ Think I'd go through the trouble of making myself 168 00:06:42,114 --> 00:06:45,755 a death robot whose only weakness is office supplies? 169 00:06:45,788 --> 00:06:47,424 ‐ Fine. You don't have to be a dick about it. 170 00:06:47,457 --> 00:06:48,894 I wanted to make a blender glove 171 00:06:48,928 --> 00:06:50,096 but that stuff wasn't here. 172 00:06:50,130 --> 00:06:51,833 Then I got distracted by the jelly beans. 173 00:06:51,867 --> 00:06:53,102 ‐ Blender glove. 174 00:06:53,136 --> 00:06:54,940 All right. That might have been cool. 175 00:06:54,973 --> 00:06:57,779 Okay. ‐ Barry, are you in there? 176 00:06:57,812 --> 00:06:58,914 ‐ Hey, bud. 177 00:06:58,948 --> 00:07:00,584 ‐ Can you talk to Other Barry, here? 178 00:07:00,618 --> 00:07:02,588 ‐ Uh, sure thing. Hey, Other Barry, 179 00:07:02,622 --> 00:07:04,124 why do you wanna do this? 180 00:07:04,158 --> 00:07:05,595 ‐ I have a really great answer to that, 181 00:07:05,628 --> 00:07:06,797 and it's "shut up." 182 00:07:06,830 --> 00:07:07,999 ‐ Classic avoidance. 183 00:07:08,032 --> 00:07:10,638 Afraid of what you might find, Other Barry? 184 00:07:10,671 --> 00:07:12,942 ‐ You had sex with my fiancée 185 00:07:12,976 --> 00:07:15,480 and dropped me from a building. Twice. 186 00:07:15,514 --> 00:07:17,184 Which made me into this. 187 00:07:17,217 --> 00:07:19,556 ‐ A mechanical demigod? Come on, man. 188 00:07:19,589 --> 00:07:21,927 We experience sex in eight dimensions now. 189 00:07:21,960 --> 00:07:22,862 ‐ Wow, you do? 190 00:07:22,895 --> 00:07:25,133 Maybe you should drop me off a building. 191 00:07:25,166 --> 00:07:27,004 ‐ Oh, I'm planning on it. 192 00:07:27,037 --> 00:07:29,943 Would you stop throwing boxes? It's really annoying. 193 00:07:29,976 --> 00:07:31,713 ‐ Other Barry, you're not a person. 194 00:07:31,747 --> 00:07:33,684 You're the rage I felt at Archer. 195 00:07:33,717 --> 00:07:36,155 I pushed you deep down into my meta programming. 196 00:07:36,188 --> 00:07:37,625 ‐ Wait, really? ‐ You're the part of me 197 00:07:37,659 --> 00:07:38,827 I tried to get rid of. 198 00:07:38,861 --> 00:07:42,935 ‐ Well, I'm still here. Okay, Archer? 199 00:07:42,969 --> 00:07:46,175 ‐ Barry, heal thyself. ‐ Seriously, shut up. 200 00:07:46,208 --> 00:07:47,979 Archer! 201 00:07:48,012 --> 00:07:51,118 ♪ Ring around the rosies ♪ 202 00:07:51,152 --> 00:07:53,657 [stammers] Damn it, that's not it either. 203 00:07:53,691 --> 00:07:55,995 ‐ Archer, he's coming. You probably know that, 204 00:07:56,028 --> 00:07:58,132 but, honestly, it feels weird and helpless 205 00:07:58,166 --> 00:07:59,636 to ride around on a psychopath, 206 00:07:59,669 --> 00:08:01,773 so I'm just saying stuff to feel alive. 207 00:08:02,341 --> 00:08:04,713 ‐ You again? I was about to get away. 208 00:08:04,746 --> 00:08:06,650 ‐ Eh, I think he had you. 209 00:08:06,683 --> 00:08:09,288 Uh, might wanna try behind him. 210 00:08:09,321 --> 00:08:11,994 ‐ [laughs] Man, I like this guy. 211 00:08:12,027 --> 00:08:13,998 ‐ Oh, come on. What kind of world would it be 212 00:08:14,031 --> 00:08:16,636 if every person I insulted made my life worse? 213 00:08:16,670 --> 00:08:18,540 ‐ I don't know, a better one. 214 00:08:18,574 --> 00:08:19,676 ‐ Ow. 215 00:08:19,709 --> 00:08:21,980 ‐ And that's lunch. 216 00:08:22,014 --> 00:08:24,151 See you in an hour, champ. 217 00:08:24,184 --> 00:08:26,222 ‐ Great, now I landed on my keys. 218 00:08:26,255 --> 00:08:28,894 Wait, I don't have keys on me. How did I... 219 00:08:28,927 --> 00:08:30,731 That mover slipped it into my pocket. 220 00:08:30,765 --> 00:08:32,769 I take back everything I said about you. 221 00:08:32,802 --> 00:08:36,576 Well, I take back 60% of what I said; no need to overreact. 222 00:08:37,044 --> 00:08:41,085 ‐ We'll do the exchange. Just d on't hurt him anymore. 223 00:08:41,720 --> 00:08:43,891 Remember, th is is a non‐lethal mission. 224 00:08:43,924 --> 00:08:45,060 ‐ Wait, for real? 225 00:08:45,093 --> 00:08:46,797 ‐ I want them alive to relive the pain 226 00:08:46,830 --> 00:08:50,905 we're about to inflict on them over and over again. 227 00:08:50,938 --> 00:08:52,975 ‐ [laughing] There's my girl. 228 00:09:01,325 --> 00:09:03,029 ‐ And we're go. 229 00:09:03,062 --> 00:09:05,166 ‐ Nice. Extensive bathroom coverage. 230 00:09:05,200 --> 00:09:07,672 ‐ Just two peas in a pervert pod. 231 00:09:07,705 --> 00:09:09,208 ‐ Hey, I'm working on one of those. 232 00:09:09,241 --> 00:09:11,847 ‐ Okay. We can all agree I look banging in this, 233 00:09:11,880 --> 00:09:13,584 but how are we gonna get in this place? 234 00:09:13,617 --> 00:09:15,320 They've got at least two guards at every entrance. 235 00:09:15,353 --> 00:09:17,190 ‐ Right. But now that we're in their system, 236 00:09:17,224 --> 00:09:18,861 I'll just leave a couple negative 237 00:09:18,894 --> 00:09:20,731 performance reviews and... 238 00:09:20,765 --> 00:09:23,169 ‐ I appreciate the creativity, but won't that take... 239 00:09:23,202 --> 00:09:25,106 ‐ Suspended. 240 00:09:25,140 --> 00:09:26,977 Trust me, this place is more uptight 241 00:09:27,010 --> 00:09:28,714 than a preacher's wife at an orgy. 242 00:09:28,747 --> 00:09:31,686 ‐ And you liked working there? ‐ They had great snacks. 243 00:09:31,720 --> 00:09:33,791 ‐ At the orgy? ‐ See, that right there 244 00:09:33,824 --> 00:09:35,694 makes me wonder why I'm taking her inside. 245 00:09:35,728 --> 00:09:39,001 ‐ Hey, I have extensive training in‐‐not anything. 246 00:09:39,034 --> 00:09:40,838 So wait, same question. 247 00:09:40,871 --> 00:09:43,109 ‐ You need to go in there and sow chaos. 248 00:09:43,142 --> 00:09:44,144 I want that place looking like 249 00:09:44,178 --> 00:09:46,115 an escaped tiger hit Mardi Gras. 250 00:09:46,148 --> 00:09:47,852 ‐ [softly] Everything has led me to this. 251 00:09:47,885 --> 00:09:50,056 ‐ Uh, where were you carrying that? 252 00:09:50,089 --> 00:09:51,827 ‐ Cyril and I are gonna go get Archer. 253 00:09:51,860 --> 00:09:53,597 ‐ Here you go; these should get you through the building. 254 00:09:53,630 --> 00:09:55,266 And if they don't, my bad. 255 00:09:55,300 --> 00:09:57,805 ‐ Has anybody heard from Ms. Archer at all? 256 00:09:57,839 --> 00:09:59,709 Kind of seems like she'd wanna be a part of this. 257 00:09:59,742 --> 00:10:01,680 ‐ Hey. Yeah. Where is Ms. Archer? 258 00:10:01,713 --> 00:10:03,784 ‐ No. Nothing. No way. 259 00:10:03,817 --> 00:10:07,157 I mean, it's just weird how not at all I've heard from her. 260 00:10:07,190 --> 00:10:09,161 ‐ Something you'd like to share with the class, Pam? 261 00:10:09,194 --> 00:10:11,132 ‐ Uh, no. ‐ There's not a secret 262 00:10:11,165 --> 00:10:13,871 you want tell 'cause it's so secret? 263 00:10:13,904 --> 00:10:15,340 ‐ I‐‐I... [whimpers] 264 00:10:15,373 --> 00:10:17,712 Fine! Fine! I'll tell you. 265 00:10:17,745 --> 00:10:20,083 I've been thinking about getting bangs. 266 00:10:20,116 --> 00:10:22,154 [sobs] 267 00:10:22,187 --> 00:10:24,358 [sobbing] It feels so good to let out. 268 00:10:24,391 --> 00:10:27,799 ‐ Nice cover. ‐ Whew, that was close, huh? 269 00:10:35,748 --> 00:10:37,050 Cyril: Oh, come on. 270 00:11:01,365 --> 00:11:03,202 ‐ Hey, hold up. [cell phone rings] 271 00:11:03,236 --> 00:11:07,077 I'm fired? Oh, my God, what am I gonna tell my wife? 272 00:11:07,110 --> 00:11:08,780 Susan's gonna leave me. 273 00:11:08,814 --> 00:11:10,784 [eerie music] 274 00:11:10,818 --> 00:11:11,987 ‐ Damn it, Archer. 275 00:11:12,020 --> 00:11:13,422 ‐ Hey, gang. 276 00:11:15,393 --> 00:11:18,299 Yeah, it still works like that. Thanks for checking, though. 277 00:11:26,816 --> 00:11:27,919 ‐ Oh, hey. ‐ Oh, hey. 278 00:11:27,952 --> 00:11:29,254 ‐ So I managed to escape 279 00:11:29,288 --> 00:11:31,091 right when you guys were running a rescue mission 280 00:11:31,125 --> 00:11:33,997 and now everyone is inside with a schizo death cyborg? 281 00:11:34,031 --> 00:11:35,366 ‐ Uh, yes. 282 00:11:35,400 --> 00:11:37,037 ‐ How is your timing so bad? 283 00:11:37,070 --> 00:11:38,406 ‐ Well, one could argue that your‐‐ 284 00:11:38,439 --> 00:11:39,909 ‐ Shut up. Gimme a Tactile Cane 285 00:11:39,943 --> 00:11:41,111 and everything else you have in the van. 286 00:11:41,145 --> 00:11:42,314 ‐ Everything? ‐ Who knows what 287 00:11:42,347 --> 00:11:43,349 we'll need to take down Barry? 288 00:11:43,382 --> 00:11:46,155 Mind‐melt helmet, the shock paddles, everything. 289 00:11:46,188 --> 00:11:47,758 ‐ You mean, like, everything‐everything? 290 00:11:47,792 --> 00:11:49,061 ‐ Well, we don't need the stuff you use 291 00:11:49,094 --> 00:11:50,497 to, like, circle jerk with ghosts. 292 00:11:50,531 --> 00:11:52,400 ‐ Well, to be fair, that stuff is mine. 293 00:11:52,434 --> 00:11:56,977 If they're sticky, that's ectoplasm and nothing else. 294 00:11:59,114 --> 00:12:00,383 ‐ We've gotta get out of here. 295 00:12:00,416 --> 00:12:02,287 ‐ No, we need to find Archer first. 296 00:12:02,320 --> 00:12:04,492 Colt: Hey, just for, like, your FYI, 297 00:12:04,525 --> 00:12:06,161 Archer actually made it out on his own. 298 00:12:06,195 --> 00:12:07,498 Krieger: Don't worry, he's on his way back in 299 00:12:07,531 --> 00:12:08,934 to get you guys out. 300 00:12:08,967 --> 00:12:10,971 ‐ What? So the same thing can happen again? 301 00:12:11,005 --> 00:12:13,810 Colt: Eesh, I hope not. [laughs] That would suck, 302 00:12:14,378 --> 00:12:16,850 Especially 'cause the building's on fire. 303 00:12:17,484 --> 00:12:19,488 ‐ [laughs] 304 00:12:21,325 --> 00:12:22,995 What the hell? 305 00:12:23,029 --> 00:12:25,233 [crowd shouting] 306 00:12:25,266 --> 00:12:27,872 [Barry shouts] 307 00:12:27,905 --> 00:12:29,542 ‐ Did you drug all those people? 308 00:12:29,575 --> 00:12:33,049 ‐ No. I just put angel dust in one of the water coolers. 309 00:12:33,082 --> 00:12:35,420 They drank that water out of their own free choicing. 310 00:12:35,453 --> 00:12:36,957 ‐ Not what "free choice" means. 311 00:12:36,990 --> 00:12:39,261 [Barry roars] 312 00:12:39,294 --> 00:12:41,365 ‐ Okay. Maybe more running. 313 00:12:41,398 --> 00:12:44,271 ‐ I suppose I'm looking for a reason my guards 314 00:12:44,304 --> 00:12:46,408 are leaving and the rest of my employees 315 00:12:46,442 --> 00:12:48,312 are stark raving bonkers. 316 00:12:48,346 --> 00:12:50,149 Well, I'd like to state for the record 317 00:12:50,183 --> 00:12:52,555 that you are not a golden being of light, 318 00:12:52,588 --> 00:12:54,826 but are in fact... 319 00:12:54,859 --> 00:12:56,128 fired. 320 00:12:57,097 --> 00:12:59,869 So are you here to find Archer or shoot me? 321 00:12:59,902 --> 00:13:02,107 Because I actually have a preference on that. 322 00:13:02,140 --> 00:13:03,910 ‐ Both. 323 00:13:03,944 --> 00:13:05,413 agents: Freeze! ‐ Don't move. 324 00:13:05,446 --> 00:13:07,852 ‐ I was this close to feeling regret. 325 00:13:07,885 --> 00:13:09,121 Would've been a first for me. 326 00:13:09,154 --> 00:13:11,826 Incidentally, why are you dressed like that? 327 00:13:11,860 --> 00:13:13,362 ‐ Isn't it obvious? 328 00:13:23,115 --> 00:13:25,921 Guess the old gal's still got it. 329 00:13:26,756 --> 00:13:29,261 ‐ Da mn it. You weren't supposed to set fire 330 00:13:29,294 --> 00:13:32,000 to the whole building. ‐ No one said that! 331 00:13:32,033 --> 00:13:33,870 At least it's sexier now. [alarms blaring] 332 00:13:33,904 --> 00:13:38,513 ‐ [singing indistinctly] 333 00:13:38,547 --> 00:13:40,984 ‐ That's not a song. 334 00:13:41,018 --> 00:13:43,022 ‐ Come on, guys. You can beat him. 335 00:13:43,055 --> 00:13:44,257 Use what's around you. 336 00:13:44,291 --> 00:13:46,563 ‐ Will you shut up? Archer already tried that, 337 00:13:46,596 --> 00:13:48,500 and it was‐‐ah, ah! 338 00:13:48,533 --> 00:13:50,436 These are delicate optical sensors. 339 00:13:50,470 --> 00:13:52,340 Do you have any idea how much these cost? 340 00:13:52,374 --> 00:13:54,177 Pam: More than your head? ‐ Do what now? 341 00:13:57,050 --> 00:13:59,021 ‐ Now, I go into your mind and take you apart 342 00:13:59,054 --> 00:14:00,557 from the inside. Hit it, Krieger. 343 00:14:00,591 --> 00:14:02,360 [blip] 344 00:14:02,394 --> 00:14:05,400 [dramatic music] 345 00:14:11,613 --> 00:14:14,585 [dramatic music] 346 00:14:14,619 --> 00:14:16,055 ♪ ♪ 347 00:14:16,088 --> 00:14:18,092 ‐ Yeah. My skull is shielded. 348 00:14:18,125 --> 00:14:19,495 [sighs] But I have to know, 349 00:14:19,529 --> 00:14:22,033 what exactly did you think would happen? 350 00:14:22,067 --> 00:14:24,104 ‐ I thought I'd maybe go inside your mind 351 00:14:24,137 --> 00:14:26,475 and there'd be a Barry and a separate Other Barry. 352 00:14:26,509 --> 00:14:28,446 ‐ And? ‐ And Other Barry 353 00:14:28,479 --> 00:14:30,617 would be some kind of Gigeresque monstrosity, 354 00:14:30,651 --> 00:14:32,588 and then Barry and I would defeat Other Barry 355 00:14:32,621 --> 00:14:34,124 in some kind of metaphorical combat 356 00:14:34,157 --> 00:14:36,261 which would forever extinguish Other Barry. 357 00:14:36,295 --> 00:14:37,598 ‐ And? ‐ Barry and I 358 00:14:37,631 --> 00:14:39,401 would be friends again. 359 00:14:39,434 --> 00:14:42,073 ‐ [laughs] 360 00:14:42,107 --> 00:14:43,510 God, what happened to you? 361 00:14:43,543 --> 00:14:45,614 ‐ I'll tell you what happened: friendship. 362 00:14:45,647 --> 00:14:47,083 ‐ Whatever. 363 00:14:48,452 --> 00:14:51,225 Now that's what I call... [metal dragging] 364 00:14:51,258 --> 00:14:52,995 ‐ Mother? ‐ Well, don't just stand there, 365 00:14:53,028 --> 00:14:54,632 idiots; do something! 366 00:15:02,515 --> 00:15:06,021 ‐ Archer, I can do a hard reboot from inside here, 367 00:15:06,054 --> 00:15:07,490 but you have to stun me. 368 00:15:07,525 --> 00:15:09,529 [paddles charging] 369 00:15:11,533 --> 00:15:13,169 Just do it. ‐ But you'll die. 370 00:15:13,202 --> 00:15:14,939 ‐ Nothing can change that now. 371 00:15:22,287 --> 00:15:24,291 ‐ Now, Krieger. 372 00:15:27,998 --> 00:15:29,535 ‐ [grunts, shouts] 373 00:15:31,472 --> 00:15:34,411 ‐ Thanks, bud. Hard reboot now. 374 00:15:35,413 --> 00:15:38,152 ‐ You saved my life, Barry. ‐ No, you saved mine. 375 00:15:38,185 --> 00:15:39,722 [emotional music] ‐ Um, how? 376 00:15:39,755 --> 00:15:41,993 ‐ I don't know. Just felt right to say. 377 00:15:42,026 --> 00:15:43,329 [audio glitching] Good‐‐good night, 378 00:15:43,362 --> 00:15:47,170 [voice dying] Sweet...me. 379 00:15:47,203 --> 00:15:48,540 ‐ No! 380 00:15:48,573 --> 00:15:50,677 ‐ Wait, that shock brought some things back. 381 00:15:50,711 --> 00:15:52,313 I built the IIA system 382 00:15:52,347 --> 00:15:54,552 and I know how to take down the entire company. 383 00:15:54,585 --> 00:15:55,554 All we gotta do is‐‐ 384 00:15:55,587 --> 00:15:58,058 [gunshot] 385 00:15:58,092 --> 00:16:01,064 ‐ You betrayed me. You were like a brother to me. 386 00:16:01,098 --> 00:16:03,202 ‐ I‐I was? 387 00:16:03,235 --> 00:16:05,507 ‐ Oh, that's unsatisfying. 388 00:16:09,582 --> 00:16:11,285 ‐ You guys get out. I'll take Fabian. 389 00:16:11,318 --> 00:16:13,189 Just make sure Mother is safe. 390 00:16:13,222 --> 00:16:15,193 Oh, I guess she already left at some point. 391 00:16:15,226 --> 00:16:17,030 Right. 392 00:16:17,531 --> 00:16:19,100 ‐ Gotta hang on, man. 393 00:16:19,134 --> 00:16:21,438 ‐ No, this is it. Just promise me. 394 00:16:21,471 --> 00:16:23,710 ‐ Anything. What? ‐ Do more science. 395 00:16:23,743 --> 00:16:26,181 Just really weird, fucked up shit. 396 00:16:26,215 --> 00:16:28,118 Stuff where even you're like, "Man, 397 00:16:28,152 --> 00:16:29,722 I shouldn't have done that." 398 00:16:29,755 --> 00:16:31,058 Do that. 399 00:16:31,091 --> 00:16:32,695 ‐ [sobbing] I will. 400 00:16:32,728 --> 00:16:35,501 ‐ [hoarsely] Thank you for being a friend. 401 00:16:35,534 --> 00:16:38,038 [groans] 402 00:16:38,072 --> 00:16:41,746 ‐ Um, hate to interrupt, but let's get out of here. 403 00:16:45,754 --> 00:16:47,625 ‐ Not getting away that easy. 404 00:16:47,658 --> 00:16:50,096 ‐ You know, that cane is appropriate. 405 00:16:50,129 --> 00:16:52,066 You're old. Your time has passed. 406 00:16:52,100 --> 00:16:55,072 The modern world has no used for your little spy boutique. 407 00:16:55,106 --> 00:16:57,210 You might as well be selling buggy whips. 408 00:16:57,243 --> 00:16:59,414 ‐ Yeah. Maybe I should sell teeth instead. 409 00:16:59,447 --> 00:17:01,351 ‐ Why would you sell‐‐ 410 00:17:01,385 --> 00:17:03,657 ‐ And we have a buyer. ‐ Right. 411 00:17:13,677 --> 00:17:15,781 Now, let's try that again. 412 00:17:22,193 --> 00:17:23,663 The almighty Archer, 413 00:17:23,697 --> 00:17:25,834 barely a shadow of your former self. 414 00:17:25,867 --> 00:17:28,773 ‐ You know, I should thank you. ‐ This ought to be good. 415 00:17:28,807 --> 00:17:30,510 ‐ I hate you so much, 416 00:17:30,544 --> 00:17:33,415 I think I just realized I don't need my cane anymore. 417 00:17:42,467 --> 00:17:44,505 [groans] 418 00:17:44,538 --> 00:17:46,341 God, I hate this hallway. 419 00:17:49,147 --> 00:17:51,385 ‐ Thanks for creating an escape route for me. 420 00:17:51,418 --> 00:17:52,821 I guess you have a choice: 421 00:17:52,855 --> 00:17:55,794 try to come after me or drag your friend out of here. 422 00:17:55,827 --> 00:17:57,130 Ta‐ta. 423 00:18:03,710 --> 00:18:06,248 ‐ You again? ‐ So it would appear. 424 00:18:07,651 --> 00:18:10,222 ‐ Why did you help me even after I'd insulted you? 425 00:18:10,256 --> 00:18:11,826 ‐ Why else are we here? 426 00:18:11,859 --> 00:18:14,097 ‐ Wow. I need to hang out with more movers. 427 00:18:17,738 --> 00:18:19,307 ‐ Robert. 428 00:18:19,341 --> 00:18:21,579 ‐ How did it go? I'm on tenterhooks, here. 429 00:18:21,613 --> 00:18:24,351 ‐ Well, we got Archer back and burned down a building. 430 00:18:24,384 --> 00:18:26,221 ‐ Ah, good. And the memory stick? 431 00:18:26,254 --> 00:18:27,591 ‐ We'll figure it out in the morning. 432 00:18:27,625 --> 00:18:29,829 We were too tired to deal with it. 433 00:18:29,862 --> 00:18:32,233 You know, I find it odd that an environmentalist 434 00:18:32,266 --> 00:18:34,572 would have the shower going while he's in bed. 435 00:18:34,605 --> 00:18:37,343 And also... okay, you are naked. 436 00:18:37,377 --> 00:18:39,214 ‐ Lana, I know what it looks like 437 00:18:39,247 --> 00:18:41,586 and that's exactly what it is. 438 00:18:41,619 --> 00:18:44,190 I understand it's awkward. ‐ Awkward? 439 00:18:44,224 --> 00:18:46,161 ‐ That word seems to trigger you. 440 00:18:46,194 --> 00:18:48,232 Was I wrong in assuming we had evolved 441 00:18:48,265 --> 00:18:49,735 into a de facto open marriage? 442 00:18:49,769 --> 00:18:52,173 ‐ Why would you assume that? 443 00:18:52,206 --> 00:18:55,614 Wait, did you talk to Archer? ‐ Yes. We had a conversation. 444 00:18:55,647 --> 00:18:58,452 ‐ That chatty, soon‐to‐be‐dead man. 445 00:18:58,485 --> 00:19:01,526 Look, what happened to Japan is not even close to this. 446 00:19:01,559 --> 00:19:03,530 ‐ Wait, what happened in Japan? 447 00:19:03,563 --> 00:19:07,337 ‐ It was‐‐is that not what we're talking about? 448 00:19:07,370 --> 00:19:09,207 ‐ I was talking with him when you got 449 00:19:09,240 --> 00:19:12,246 that bartender's phone number. ‐ It was a receipt. 450 00:19:12,280 --> 00:19:13,917 And that was enough for you to cheat on me? 451 00:19:13,950 --> 00:19:15,386 ‐ And what about Japan? 452 00:19:15,419 --> 00:19:16,889 ‐ You didn't even know about that. 453 00:19:16,923 --> 00:19:19,194 This is about you being so jealous over a phone number‐‐ 454 00:19:19,227 --> 00:19:20,463 I mean, a receipt! 455 00:19:20,497 --> 00:19:22,400 ‐ So you thought it was a phone number? 456 00:19:22,433 --> 00:19:25,473 I knew it. ‐ I almost died today, okay? 457 00:19:25,507 --> 00:19:27,511 Like, a lot. ‐ Well, we didn't know that 458 00:19:27,544 --> 00:19:29,481 because you cut us out of the whole thing. 459 00:19:29,515 --> 00:19:31,418 ‐ Wait a minute, who's "us"? 460 00:19:31,451 --> 00:19:34,424 ‐ Ugh, I got tired of waiting in the bathroom. 461 00:19:34,457 --> 00:19:35,761 ‐ Yep. I'm out. 462 00:19:41,606 --> 00:19:42,975 ‐ Stupid bouncer. 463 00:19:43,008 --> 00:19:44,912 Maybe you have unprocessed trauma 464 00:19:44,945 --> 00:19:47,283 that you're expressing as hostility. 465 00:19:47,316 --> 00:19:50,524 And, by the way, when did bouncers get so insightful? 466 00:19:50,557 --> 00:19:53,563 [nearby sobbing] Huh? 467 00:19:53,596 --> 00:19:57,236 [Lana sniffling] 468 00:19:57,270 --> 00:20:00,242 [gentle music] 469 00:20:00,276 --> 00:20:07,290 ♪ ♪ 470 00:20:08,292 --> 00:20:09,929 Should we wait for mother, Pam? 471 00:20:09,962 --> 00:20:11,532 ‐ Don't look at me, she just told me 472 00:20:11,566 --> 00:20:13,268 to coordinate the rescue with her. 473 00:20:13,302 --> 00:20:15,406 She didn't wanna tell you guys because she thought you'd blab 474 00:20:15,439 --> 00:20:16,943 and blow her element of surprise. 475 00:20:16,976 --> 00:20:19,481 ‐ And she told you? A woman whose loose lips have sunk 476 00:20:19,515 --> 00:20:20,884 so many ships they should be named 477 00:20:20,917 --> 00:20:23,857 Admiral Nelson and concept of torpedoes? 478 00:20:23,890 --> 00:20:26,529 ‐ Well, pardon me for experiencing emotional growth, 479 00:20:26,562 --> 00:20:28,733 you dick. ‐ I guess we start without her. 480 00:20:28,767 --> 00:20:31,706 So now that we're all rested, ideas for the memory stick? 481 00:20:33,041 --> 00:20:34,545 ‐ Really? Nothing? 482 00:20:34,578 --> 00:20:36,348 So we slept on it for no discernible reason? 483 00:20:36,381 --> 00:20:38,686 ‐ Well, not no discernible reason. 484 00:20:38,720 --> 00:20:40,356 I think you can all relax. 485 00:20:40,389 --> 00:20:41,859 ‐ Robert, I don't think another infusion of cash 486 00:20:41,893 --> 00:20:43,496 is going to make a difference. 487 00:20:43,530 --> 00:20:46,435 ‐ Oh, no, no, no, no, no. I'm done burning money. 488 00:20:46,468 --> 00:20:49,642 I sold the agency to a well‐funded equity group, 489 00:20:49,675 --> 00:20:50,844 United Money Partners. 490 00:20:50,877 --> 00:20:53,382 You could destroy the chip and stay afloat. 491 00:20:53,415 --> 00:20:55,386 ‐ United Money Partners, LLC. 492 00:20:55,419 --> 00:20:58,358 Looks like that's owned by a General Business, Inc., 493 00:20:58,392 --> 00:21:01,499 which is actually a shell company owned by YYZ. 494 00:21:01,532 --> 00:21:03,035 ‐ Zed. ‐ Which is in turn owned 495 00:21:03,068 --> 00:21:05,574 by a majority stakeholder named‐‐ 496 00:21:05,607 --> 00:21:07,578 ‐ Fabian Kingsworth. 497 00:21:07,611 --> 00:21:09,915 I was just so impressed with your initiative, 498 00:21:09,949 --> 00:21:11,853 grit, and improvisation last night, 499 00:21:11,886 --> 00:21:14,592 I knew that IIA had to acquire you. 500 00:21:14,625 --> 00:21:16,328 ‐ Yes! ‐ Really? 501 00:21:16,361 --> 00:21:17,865 ‐ They have great snacks. 502 00:21:17,898 --> 00:21:20,904 ‐ Archer, I hate to use the term "fun fact," 503 00:21:20,937 --> 00:21:23,510 but did you know that as part of a tax dodge, 504 00:21:23,543 --> 00:21:27,383 your apartment and everything in it is property of the agency 505 00:21:27,416 --> 00:21:28,820 and therefore mine? 506 00:21:28,853 --> 00:21:31,659 And so is that memory stick. 507 00:21:31,692 --> 00:21:33,596 ‐ Not so fast. ‐ Oh, what now? 508 00:21:33,630 --> 00:21:35,500 ‐ Yeah. Curious where you're going with this. 509 00:21:35,534 --> 00:21:38,338 ‐ There's one thing you fail to understand, Fabian, 510 00:21:38,372 --> 00:21:39,742 and when I reveal it, 511 00:21:39,775 --> 00:21:42,614 you will realize that you have been taken for a fool. 512 00:21:42,648 --> 00:21:44,017 ‐ And what's that, Archer? 513 00:21:49,662 --> 00:21:52,901 ‐ So what kinda snacks are we talking about? 514 00:22:06,662 --> 00:22:08,666 ‐ Hey. I‐I don't think you wanna do that. 515 00:22:08,700 --> 00:22:11,606 ‐ No, let 'em. Give me that. 516 00:22:12,708 --> 00:22:15,379 "My dearest Sterling, do you remember what I told you 517 00:22:15,412 --> 00:22:18,553 "on your first day of training? You probably don't, but it was, 518 00:22:18,586 --> 00:22:20,389 "'Always know where the exits are.' 519 00:22:20,422 --> 00:22:22,594 "And with all the chaos and confusion of late, 520 00:22:22,628 --> 00:22:24,999 "I thought it would be wise to make my own exit 521 00:22:25,032 --> 00:22:28,071 "in my own time, on my own terms and in a way 522 00:22:28,105 --> 00:22:30,409 "that I can never be found by my enemies 523 00:22:30,442 --> 00:22:34,017 or all my lovesick paramours, who are literally countless." 524 00:22:34,050 --> 00:22:35,419 Ugh. 525 00:22:35,452 --> 00:22:36,722 "And so I've decided 526 00:22:36,756 --> 00:22:38,927 "that it's time to pass the torch. 527 00:22:38,960 --> 00:22:40,830 Try not to burn yourselves with it." 528 00:22:40,864 --> 00:22:42,099 [flame crackles] 529 00:22:42,133 --> 00:22:44,070 ‐ What? It relaxes me. 530 00:22:44,103 --> 00:22:46,676 ‐ "And I know my decision may seem abrupt, 531 00:22:46,709 --> 00:22:50,416 "but we don't always get to choose the perfect moment. 532 00:22:50,449 --> 00:22:52,588 "Take care of yourselves, and especially you, 533 00:22:52,621 --> 00:22:55,560 "my Sterling, because from wherever I am, 534 00:22:55,594 --> 00:22:57,598 "I'll be watching over you. 535 00:22:57,631 --> 00:22:59,969 Love, Mother." 536 00:23:00,002 --> 00:23:02,440 ‐ If I see this glass empty again, 537 00:23:02,473 --> 00:23:04,979 I will be very unhappy. 538 00:23:05,012 --> 00:23:07,651 ‐ And how is my lady love? 539 00:23:07,684 --> 00:23:09,888 ‐ Infinitely better now. 540 00:23:42,921 --> 00:23:45,961 ‐ Made in Georgia.