1 00:00:52,020 --> 00:00:56,590 ♪ One life, I'm gonna live it up ♪ 2 00:00:58,930 --> 00:01:03,400 ♪ I'm taking flight, I said I'll never get enough ♪ 3 00:01:06,000 --> 00:01:10,570 ♪ Stand tall, I'm young and kinda proud ♪ 4 00:01:12,980 --> 00:01:18,150 ♪ I'm on top as long as the music's loud ♪ 5 00:01:20,880 --> 00:01:22,580 ♪ if you think I'll sit around ♪ 6 00:01:22,620 --> 00:01:23,890 ♪ as the world goes by ♪ 7 00:01:23,920 --> 00:01:25,096 ♪ you're thinking like a fool ♪ 8 00:01:25,120 --> 00:01:27,760 ♪ 'cause it's a case of do or die ♪ 9 00:01:27,790 --> 00:01:30,830 ♪ out there is a fortune waiting to be had ♪ 10 00:01:30,860 --> 00:01:31,860 ♪ if you think ♪ 11 00:01:31,900 --> 00:01:32,936 ♪ I'll let it go, you're mad ♪ 12 00:01:32,960 --> 00:01:34,530 ♪ you've got ♪ 13 00:01:34,570 --> 00:01:35,570 ♪ another thing comin' ♪ 14 00:01:36,770 --> 00:01:38,770 ♪ you've got another thing comin' ♪ 15 00:01:41,740 --> 00:01:43,070 ♪ That's right ♪ 16 00:01:43,110 --> 00:01:45,770 ♪ here's where the talking ends ♪ 17 00:01:48,150 --> 00:01:49,950 ♪ well, listen this night ♪ 18 00:01:49,980 --> 00:01:52,580 ♪ there'll be some action spent ♪ 19 00:01:55,220 --> 00:02:00,490 ♪ Drive hard, I'm calling all the shots ♪ 20 00:02:02,230 --> 00:02:06,700 ♪ I got an ace card, coming down on the rocks ♪ 21 00:02:09,930 --> 00:02:11,046 ♪ If you think I'll sit around ♪ 22 00:02:11,070 --> 00:02:13,670 ♪ while you chip away my brain ♪ 23 00:02:13,700 --> 00:02:17,410 Thar she blows, you Moby dicks! 24 00:02:18,080 --> 00:02:19,510 ♪ Fortune waiting ♪ 25 00:02:19,540 --> 00:02:20,580 ♪ to be had ♪ 26 00:02:22,810 --> 00:02:24,580 ♪ you've got another thing comin' ♪ 27 00:02:25,950 --> 00:02:28,950 ♪ you've got another thing comin' ♪ 28 00:02:28,990 --> 00:02:30,720 ♪ you've got another thing ♪ 29 00:02:31,961 --> 00:02:34,931 Ah, what is it now? 30 00:02:34,971 --> 00:02:36,871 You know, we're only trying to steal back 31 00:02:36,901 --> 00:02:39,041 a priceless artifact that, by the way, 32 00:02:39,071 --> 00:02:43,041 belongs in a... holy shit. 33 00:02:43,081 --> 00:02:45,681 - He woke up. - What? 34 00:02:46,981 --> 00:02:48,011 Archer's awake? 35 00:02:48,051 --> 00:02:50,081 Oh, my god. 36 00:02:50,121 --> 00:02:51,321 Oh, my god is right. 37 00:02:51,351 --> 00:02:56,021 If you thought that rocked, wait till you hear this. 38 00:03:33,431 --> 00:03:34,431 Woodhouse. 39 00:03:35,901 --> 00:03:37,261 Woodhouse. 40 00:03:39,401 --> 00:03:40,401 Woodhouse! 41 00:03:40,501 --> 00:03:41,601 Oh. 42 00:03:41,701 --> 00:03:43,731 Never mind, you're dead, 43 00:03:43,841 --> 00:03:45,721 which is just so selfish. 44 00:03:54,661 --> 00:03:56,601 God, we get it, phone. 45 00:03:56,631 --> 00:03:58,471 You ring. 46 00:03:58,501 --> 00:03:59,501 What now? 47 00:03:59,541 --> 00:04:02,001 Sterling, I expect to see you at work today. 48 00:04:02,041 --> 00:04:04,711 I was thinking maybe I'd just do what I did yesterday. 49 00:04:04,741 --> 00:04:06,741 You know, stare into the void. 50 00:04:06,781 --> 00:04:08,581 The void stares into me. 51 00:04:08,611 --> 00:04:09,781 Mostly void stuff. 52 00:04:09,811 --> 00:04:10,941 No more stalling! 53 00:04:10,981 --> 00:04:12,911 I didn't raise a shrinking violet 54 00:04:12,951 --> 00:04:14,681 that wilts at the slightest... 55 00:04:14,721 --> 00:04:15,951 three-year coma, mother. 56 00:04:15,991 --> 00:04:18,921 Sure, coach, I'll rub some dirt on my nerve damage. 57 00:04:18,951 --> 00:04:22,521 Speaking of, a new valet is coming at 9:00 58 00:04:22,561 --> 00:04:23,667 to see if he can do anything 59 00:04:23,691 --> 00:04:28,501 about that bacteria breeding facility you call a home. 60 00:04:28,531 --> 00:04:29,361 I don't know. 61 00:04:29,401 --> 00:04:31,701 Sterling, dear, I'm only doing this 62 00:04:31,731 --> 00:04:33,801 because you are totally incapable 63 00:04:33,841 --> 00:04:36,571 of taking care of yourself and always have been. 64 00:04:36,611 --> 00:04:37,871 That's very sweet, mother. 65 00:04:37,911 --> 00:04:39,871 I promise I'll give him a fair shake. 66 00:04:42,751 --> 00:04:44,551 - Good morning, sir. I'm your new... 67 00:04:44,581 --> 00:04:45,711 It's 9:02! 68 00:04:45,751 --> 00:04:47,751 Oh, Woodhouse. 69 00:04:47,781 --> 00:04:49,751 What I wouldn't give to force-feed you 70 00:04:49,791 --> 00:04:51,791 aquarium gravel one last time. 71 00:04:51,821 --> 00:04:54,861 The turquoise, you hated that. 72 00:05:00,761 --> 00:05:01,861 All right, all right, 73 00:05:01,901 --> 00:05:05,701 let's not make a big deal out of... This. 74 00:05:06,471 --> 00:05:09,441 Thank you for so swiftly honoring my request. 75 00:05:11,611 --> 00:05:12,841 Oh, a wave, 76 00:05:12,881 --> 00:05:15,781 an entirely appropriate response to my heroism. 77 00:05:15,811 --> 00:05:17,541 Welcome back, sir. 78 00:05:18,781 --> 00:05:19,951 Oh, that's it? 79 00:05:19,981 --> 00:05:22,921 I was expecting some kind of batshit crazy add-on. 80 00:05:22,951 --> 00:05:24,851 I'm sure I don't know what you mean. 81 00:05:24,891 --> 00:05:27,521 Here's your briefing book, new staff handbook, 82 00:05:27,561 --> 00:05:28,621 and your drink. 83 00:05:28,661 --> 00:05:29,661 Thank you. 84 00:05:29,691 --> 00:05:31,731 Um, just out of curiosity, 85 00:05:31,761 --> 00:05:32,937 when did you get your shit together? 86 00:05:32,961 --> 00:05:34,061 Oh, I don't know. 87 00:05:34,101 --> 00:05:35,961 I guess it was probably around coma-o'clock. 88 00:05:36,001 --> 00:05:37,161 Wait, what? 89 00:05:37,201 --> 00:05:40,171 That's just an inside joke we had about your coma. 90 00:05:40,201 --> 00:05:43,671 I guess you had to be there and not in a coma. 91 00:05:43,711 --> 00:05:44,941 Well, you made it... 92 00:05:44,971 --> 00:05:46,811 Two hours late, but you're here. 93 00:05:46,841 --> 00:05:48,217 I'm supposed to be here at a time? 94 00:05:48,241 --> 00:05:51,851 We've got a mission tonight, and I want you on it. 95 00:05:51,881 --> 00:05:54,581 - A mission? So we're really spies again? 96 00:05:54,621 --> 00:05:55,321 Mm-hmm. 97 00:05:55,351 --> 00:05:57,651 A quasi-independent, freelance 98 00:05:57,691 --> 00:05:58,991 international spy organization. 99 00:05:59,021 --> 00:06:01,961 - Don't worry about it. - I kind of feel like I should. 100 00:06:01,991 --> 00:06:03,721 Well, then still don't. 101 00:06:03,761 --> 00:06:05,061 So now that we're all here... 102 00:06:05,091 --> 00:06:06,861 - Whoa, wait. What about Lana? 103 00:06:06,901 --> 00:06:09,931 - She's doing... Advance scouting. 104 00:06:09,971 --> 00:06:11,871 Man, I've hardly seen her at all. 105 00:06:11,901 --> 00:06:13,801 It would almost seem like she's ducking me. 106 00:06:15,071 --> 00:06:17,901 Oh, stop it with the portentous mumbles. 107 00:06:17,941 --> 00:06:19,871 We had a whole talk about that. 108 00:06:19,911 --> 00:06:22,841 The point is, our cover story is that 109 00:06:22,881 --> 00:06:25,111 we're providing security at a museum gala, 110 00:06:25,151 --> 00:06:29,521 but our true mission is a bit more interesting. 111 00:06:29,551 --> 00:06:30,251 Cyril? 112 00:06:30,291 --> 00:06:31,821 Well, our true purpose is to... 113 00:06:31,851 --> 00:06:33,121 wait, why is Cyril talking? 114 00:06:33,161 --> 00:06:36,061 Wh... what is it, best agent in the world gets to talk day 115 00:06:36,091 --> 00:06:39,531 and opposite day simultaneously? 116 00:06:39,561 --> 00:06:40,391 Uh-huh. 117 00:06:40,431 --> 00:06:42,031 We don't do that anymore, Archer. 118 00:06:43,101 --> 00:06:45,201 Jeezy Petes. That keeps happening. 119 00:06:45,231 --> 00:06:47,931 The dangers of increased muscle mass, I guess. 120 00:06:47,971 --> 00:06:49,971 Hey, steroids aren't the answer 121 00:06:50,011 --> 00:06:53,171 no matter how inadequate you feel and in fact are. 122 00:06:53,211 --> 00:06:56,141 The only thing I'm injecting myself with is hard work, 123 00:06:56,181 --> 00:07:00,581 using the syringe of... Nope, lost it. 124 00:07:00,621 --> 00:07:01,751 Anyhoo... 125 00:07:01,781 --> 00:07:05,221 Our target is Peregrine, the world's foremost art thief. 126 00:07:05,251 --> 00:07:09,121 He's going to try to steal this statue of weeping Orpheus. 127 00:07:09,161 --> 00:07:11,591 We nabbed it from one of his warehouses 128 00:07:11,631 --> 00:07:12,631 to use as bait. 129 00:07:12,661 --> 00:07:13,631 Our objective: 130 00:07:13,661 --> 00:07:16,031 Apprehend Peregrine and pass him to Interpol. 131 00:07:16,071 --> 00:07:18,931 Man, you guys are lost without me. 132 00:07:18,971 --> 00:07:20,147 He's gonna know that's a ruse. 133 00:07:20,171 --> 00:07:22,201 Which is exactly why he'll come. 134 00:07:22,241 --> 00:07:24,941 Our psych profile shows a pathological need 135 00:07:24,971 --> 00:07:26,711 to demonstrate superiority. 136 00:07:26,741 --> 00:07:27,611 Sound familiar? 137 00:07:27,641 --> 00:07:29,087 He'll show up to try to outsmart us. 138 00:07:29,111 --> 00:07:31,951 - Nice briefing, Cyril. Super concise. 139 00:07:31,981 --> 00:07:34,411 What, you guys are friends now? 140 00:07:34,981 --> 00:07:36,921 Well, I'm spent. 141 00:07:36,951 --> 00:07:39,051 And what a better way to celebrate my return 142 00:07:39,091 --> 00:07:41,291 than me escorting all of you to Chez Trop Cher 143 00:07:41,321 --> 00:07:44,091 where I will generously allow you to buy me brunch. 144 00:07:44,131 --> 00:07:45,267 - Oh, no thank you. - Brunch... 145 00:07:45,291 --> 00:07:47,091 Can you guys take it somewhere else? 146 00:07:47,131 --> 00:07:49,761 New, better Cheryl is trying to get work done. 147 00:07:49,801 --> 00:07:51,001 You used to be fun. 148 00:07:51,031 --> 00:07:52,377 Yeah, well, your legs used to work. 149 00:07:52,401 --> 00:07:55,001 Look, we've been targeting Peregrine for months. 150 00:07:55,041 --> 00:07:56,347 This is kind of a huge deal for us. 151 00:07:56,371 --> 00:07:59,111 So huge deal like your buddy just got out of a coma, 152 00:07:59,141 --> 00:08:01,141 or huge deal like art theft, 153 00:08:01,181 --> 00:08:03,811 which is basically a victimless crime? 154 00:08:03,851 --> 00:08:04,851 - Um... - We've, uh... 155 00:08:04,881 --> 00:08:06,051 We've got stuff to do. 156 00:08:06,081 --> 00:08:07,881 Come on, man, we'll hang out soon. 157 00:08:07,921 --> 00:08:09,181 I swear, but until then, 158 00:08:09,221 --> 00:08:12,151 maybe chill your balls out just a skosh. 159 00:08:12,191 --> 00:08:14,191 Oh, my balls are frosty, okay? 160 00:08:14,221 --> 00:08:17,061 But if you're all too busy and/or stupid 161 00:08:17,091 --> 00:08:19,791 to go with me to brunch, I'll be in my office 162 00:08:19,831 --> 00:08:21,131 when you're ready to apologize. 163 00:08:21,161 --> 00:08:23,261 Not sure if this takes the sting out of it, 164 00:08:23,301 --> 00:08:26,171 but you don't actually have an office anymore. 165 00:08:26,201 --> 00:08:29,101 Oh, so I'm supposed to hang out where? 166 00:08:29,141 --> 00:08:33,111 In the break room, alone, like a pervert, 167 00:08:33,141 --> 00:08:36,911 wallowing in a miasma of microwaved fish curry 168 00:08:36,951 --> 00:08:38,251 and its subsequent farts. 169 00:08:38,281 --> 00:08:40,111 Sometimes you buy too much salmon. 170 00:08:40,151 --> 00:08:42,851 - What, to attract bears? Did you get that? 171 00:08:42,891 --> 00:08:43,851 There's a double meaning. 172 00:08:43,891 --> 00:08:45,021 Yeah, subtle. 173 00:08:45,051 --> 00:08:47,891 Anyway, since my time here on earth is finite, 174 00:08:47,921 --> 00:08:49,021 Krieger wants to see you. 175 00:08:49,061 --> 00:08:50,367 Great, the only person with time to hang out 176 00:08:50,391 --> 00:08:53,131 is wanted for ethical violations in nine countries. 177 00:08:53,161 --> 00:08:55,001 It's up to ten now. 178 00:08:55,031 --> 00:08:57,001 Well, speaking of crimes against humanity, 179 00:08:57,031 --> 00:08:58,207 how do you fit anything in the fridge 180 00:08:58,231 --> 00:09:00,271 with all of Cyril's proteins anyway? 181 00:09:00,301 --> 00:09:03,701 It's like the last helicopter out of Saigon in there, 182 00:09:03,741 --> 00:09:04,741 but shakes. 183 00:09:10,681 --> 00:09:11,381 So... 184 00:09:11,411 --> 00:09:13,011 The recently de-comafied brain 185 00:09:13,051 --> 00:09:14,327 is a complete mystery to science, 186 00:09:14,351 --> 00:09:17,751 like dark matter or why squirrels get so enraged 187 00:09:17,791 --> 00:09:18,651 when they see me naked. 188 00:09:18,691 --> 00:09:20,991 Uh-huh, nodding, no need to explore. 189 00:09:21,021 --> 00:09:23,021 So what I want you to do 190 00:09:23,061 --> 00:09:25,131 is remember all of your coma dreams. 191 00:09:25,161 --> 00:09:27,031 Put them in your mind. 192 00:09:27,061 --> 00:09:29,761 Now... speak. 193 00:09:29,801 --> 00:09:31,101 There's so much. 194 00:09:31,131 --> 00:09:33,931 First, I was a private detective, right, in a... 195 00:09:33,971 --> 00:09:35,041 Yep, that's enough. 196 00:09:35,071 --> 00:09:36,387 - Really? 'Cause there's kind of a lot. 197 00:09:36,411 --> 00:09:39,241 Yep, just needed enough to calibrate your brain waves. 198 00:09:39,271 --> 00:09:41,341 Though if you're looking to plumb your psyche 199 00:09:41,381 --> 00:09:43,981 with morally questionable "flatliners" -style 200 00:09:44,011 --> 00:09:46,111 experimentation, I'm down to clown. 201 00:09:46,151 --> 00:09:49,081 Tempting, but no, especially because for you, 202 00:09:49,121 --> 00:09:52,151 the clown in question is probably John Wayne Gacy. 203 00:09:52,191 --> 00:09:53,391 Exactly. 204 00:09:53,421 --> 00:09:57,791 Yeah, I already have one of those in my hand currently. 205 00:09:57,831 --> 00:09:58,931 Not like this. 206 00:09:58,961 --> 00:10:00,161 I used your scan to calibrate 207 00:10:00,201 --> 00:10:03,961 your new brain wave sensitive tactical mobility device, 208 00:10:04,001 --> 00:10:06,271 or for short, BWSTMD. 209 00:10:06,301 --> 00:10:07,971 Krieger, you should probably start 210 00:10:08,001 --> 00:10:09,017 working backwards on those. 211 00:10:09,041 --> 00:10:11,971 Let's just call it the tactil-cane. 212 00:10:12,011 --> 00:10:13,341 Hey, that feels pretty good. 213 00:10:13,381 --> 00:10:16,241 It anticipates your moves and enhances them, 214 00:10:16,281 --> 00:10:17,387 working with your nervous system 215 00:10:17,411 --> 00:10:20,211 to rebalance you, plus infrared telescope, 216 00:10:20,251 --> 00:10:22,781 garrote, and a sleeping gas canister. 217 00:10:22,821 --> 00:10:23,681 This! 218 00:10:23,721 --> 00:10:26,391 This is the moment it all turns around. 219 00:10:26,421 --> 00:10:30,021 My inevitable rise to my rightful place 220 00:10:30,061 --> 00:10:32,091 at the top of the... ugh... it... 221 00:10:33,431 --> 00:10:36,761 Oh, yeah, don't hold it like that. 222 00:10:40,721 --> 00:10:42,121 All our intelligence suggests 223 00:10:42,221 --> 00:10:44,391 that Peregrine will strike tonight. 224 00:10:44,491 --> 00:10:45,491 Cyril? 225 00:10:45,521 --> 00:10:46,521 Thank you, Malory. 226 00:10:46,631 --> 00:10:48,891 Now this guy's silk and stealth on the entrance, 227 00:10:48,991 --> 00:10:50,931 bullets and balaclavas on the exit. 228 00:10:51,031 --> 00:10:53,531 He will shoot his way out if he has to. 229 00:10:53,631 --> 00:10:54,901 We have one advantage: 230 00:10:55,001 --> 00:10:57,681 He doesn't know that we know what he looks like. 231 00:10:57,721 --> 00:10:59,591 - Whoa. Sploosh, right? 232 00:10:59,621 --> 00:11:00,621 - Oh... - Yeah. 233 00:11:00,661 --> 00:11:01,921 We don't do that anymore. 234 00:11:01,961 --> 00:11:03,961 You... you don't what, sploosh? 235 00:11:03,991 --> 00:11:05,761 You have to sploosh. 236 00:11:05,791 --> 00:11:08,561 You all sploosh. Everybody splooshes! 237 00:11:08,601 --> 00:11:09,961 I do not sploosh. 238 00:11:10,001 --> 00:11:12,731 Well, thank you, detective dick droop. 239 00:11:12,771 --> 00:11:14,571 Anything else you wanna ruin for us? 240 00:11:14,601 --> 00:11:15,871 Oh, a great many things. 241 00:11:15,901 --> 00:11:18,841 This is agent Bruchstein, Interpol liaison, 242 00:11:18,871 --> 00:11:20,711 just in from Belgium. 243 00:11:20,741 --> 00:11:22,041 So she's here to wander around 244 00:11:22,081 --> 00:11:23,881 and screw things up as much as possible. 245 00:11:23,911 --> 00:11:25,881 I supplied you with the photo. 246 00:11:25,911 --> 00:11:27,611 Well, let's just coast on that 247 00:11:27,651 --> 00:11:28,751 for the rest of your life. 248 00:11:28,781 --> 00:11:30,681 - Spread out. Eyes open. 249 00:11:30,721 --> 00:11:31,891 Krieger is on comms. 250 00:11:31,921 --> 00:11:33,751 I thought we just needed audio. 251 00:11:33,791 --> 00:11:35,391 Oh, yeah. 252 00:11:36,591 --> 00:11:38,831 Aww, you didn't bring the fun stuff. 253 00:11:38,861 --> 00:11:41,831 Archer, I need you to stay here, 254 00:11:41,861 --> 00:11:42,961 close to the statue. 255 00:11:43,001 --> 00:11:44,731 You'll have the element of surprise. 256 00:11:44,771 --> 00:11:46,001 - Shut up. There's Lana. 257 00:11:46,031 --> 00:11:49,171 I suppose you'll tell me he's not usually like that. 258 00:11:49,201 --> 00:11:51,161 - He's always like that. - That's pretty much him. 259 00:11:52,841 --> 00:11:54,571 Lana. 260 00:11:54,611 --> 00:11:56,111 Hi. I... wow. 261 00:11:56,141 --> 00:12:00,081 Sorry, it's always a shock that you look like that. 262 00:12:00,121 --> 00:12:03,621 Archer, it's, uh... it's good to have you back on mission. 263 00:12:03,651 --> 00:12:05,721 - Yes. I mean, no, not yet. 264 00:12:05,751 --> 00:12:07,921 Uh, look, I know you've been ducking me. 265 00:12:07,961 --> 00:12:09,967 So I need to tell you something now before you bail again. 266 00:12:09,991 --> 00:12:12,131 Oh, coming in hot. 267 00:12:12,161 --> 00:12:15,631 Well, whatever this is, it's probably not a good time. 268 00:12:15,661 --> 00:12:16,847 No, no, no, this can't wait. 269 00:12:16,871 --> 00:12:18,871 Lana, I lived several lifetimes 270 00:12:18,901 --> 00:12:19,931 while I was in that coma, 271 00:12:19,971 --> 00:12:22,571 in a bunch of different genres, I guess. 272 00:12:22,601 --> 00:12:23,741 Everything was changing. 273 00:12:23,771 --> 00:12:25,017 I couldn't get a handle on who I was 274 00:12:25,041 --> 00:12:29,141 or what it all meant, but the one constant was you. 275 00:12:29,181 --> 00:12:32,211 Needing you is apparently the deepest part of me. 276 00:12:32,251 --> 00:12:36,021 I guess I don't know what I'm proposing, except... 277 00:12:36,051 --> 00:12:38,151 Uh, if you could excuse us, buddy, 278 00:12:38,191 --> 00:12:40,751 I'm in the middle of giving a heartfelt, 279 00:12:40,791 --> 00:12:41,891 life-changing speech. 280 00:12:41,921 --> 00:12:43,721 To my beautiful wife. 281 00:12:43,761 --> 00:12:46,031 Yes, I get it. 282 00:12:46,061 --> 00:12:48,831 Hello, sterling. I'm Robert. 283 00:12:48,861 --> 00:12:51,671 Bu... bu wha... bu wha... fa... da... 284 00:12:51,701 --> 00:12:52,371 Bald! 285 00:12:52,401 --> 00:12:53,271 Yeah, we can talk 286 00:12:53,301 --> 00:12:55,241 more about how and why I'm bald later. 287 00:12:55,271 --> 00:12:59,641 I know this is all a shock, but the feelings here are real, 288 00:12:59,681 --> 00:13:00,871 and I honor them. 289 00:13:00,911 --> 00:13:03,581 And we understand and love you. 290 00:13:04,781 --> 00:13:06,611 You do not get to love me! 291 00:13:06,651 --> 00:13:07,981 That is a hostile act! 292 00:13:08,021 --> 00:13:09,821 What is the how of that? 293 00:13:09,851 --> 00:13:11,097 Though maybe the portentous mumbles 294 00:13:11,121 --> 00:13:13,067 should have tipped me off that something was coming. 295 00:13:13,091 --> 00:13:14,991 Well, that is what portentous means. 296 00:13:15,021 --> 00:13:16,991 So how long into my coma was it 297 00:13:17,031 --> 00:13:19,061 before you bravely pushed aside your grief 298 00:13:19,091 --> 00:13:22,861 and married that human catheter ad? 299 00:13:22,901 --> 00:13:24,761 - Eight months. - Eight months? 300 00:13:24,801 --> 00:13:25,831 When did you meet him? 301 00:13:25,871 --> 00:13:27,171 Um, at your hospital. 302 00:13:27,201 --> 00:13:29,971 He was doing a fundraiser for kids with cancer. 303 00:13:30,011 --> 00:13:31,911 Oldest trick in the book. 304 00:13:31,941 --> 00:13:33,971 - What book? - All the books, Lana! 305 00:13:34,011 --> 00:13:35,187 Okay, one, we weren't together, 306 00:13:35,211 --> 00:13:38,711 and two, there doesn't need to be a two! 307 00:13:39,881 --> 00:13:41,921 This is gonna take time, Archer. 308 00:13:41,951 --> 00:13:43,027 Okay? There's a lot you missed. 309 00:13:43,051 --> 00:13:44,951 - I'm sorry. I... I get it. 310 00:13:44,991 --> 00:13:47,651 I just... I just need to know one thing. 311 00:13:48,491 --> 00:13:50,861 What does his skin feel like, papery or more mushy? 312 00:13:54,861 --> 00:13:57,031 Is it scaly like a sleestak? 313 00:13:59,901 --> 00:14:01,071 Quite a crowd here. 314 00:14:01,101 --> 00:14:03,001 Yeah, they really packed them in, 315 00:14:03,041 --> 00:14:04,841 like protein shakes in a fridge. 316 00:14:04,871 --> 00:14:06,241 - What was that? - I was agreeing. 317 00:14:06,271 --> 00:14:08,017 You know, if you have something to say, just... 318 00:14:08,041 --> 00:14:09,311 you're a fridge hog! 319 00:14:09,341 --> 00:14:12,681 See, doesn't that feel better than being passive-aggressive? 320 00:14:12,711 --> 00:14:13,551 I... I guess. 321 00:14:13,581 --> 00:14:16,581 I... extremely passiveaggressive. 322 00:14:17,951 --> 00:14:20,891 So what do you think? 323 00:14:20,921 --> 00:14:22,821 It kind of looks like that thing 324 00:14:22,861 --> 00:14:24,067 where you've been away for a long time, 325 00:14:24,091 --> 00:14:26,191 and when you come back, no one really cares, 326 00:14:26,231 --> 00:14:28,801 and people have moved on, and you're all alone, 327 00:14:28,831 --> 00:14:30,731 and nobody understands you. 328 00:14:31,971 --> 00:14:33,931 Or maybe it's just a lady with big cans. 329 00:14:33,971 --> 00:14:37,071 - Oh, I don't know. Her cans aren't that big. 330 00:14:37,111 --> 00:14:38,271 And now this. 331 00:14:38,311 --> 00:14:40,241 You know, sterling, I think it's important 332 00:14:40,281 --> 00:14:44,011 to look at these cans in context of their era. 333 00:14:44,051 --> 00:14:46,911 So what are you, some crazy rich millionaire? 334 00:14:46,951 --> 00:14:48,011 Millionaire? 335 00:14:48,051 --> 00:14:50,781 Oh, god, no, no, no, no. 336 00:14:50,821 --> 00:14:52,251 I hit billionaire at 25. 337 00:14:52,291 --> 00:14:54,891 This is actually my wing of the museum, 338 00:14:54,921 --> 00:14:57,891 but that's not what this is about. 339 00:14:57,931 --> 00:14:59,107 I find that hard to believe. 340 00:14:59,131 --> 00:15:01,061 I know you don't want to hear this right now, 341 00:15:01,101 --> 00:15:04,931 but the fact that you think me and Lana are impossible 342 00:15:04,971 --> 00:15:08,071 is what makes you and Lana impossible. 343 00:15:08,101 --> 00:15:11,171 - Wow. - Yeah, hits pretty hard. 344 00:15:11,211 --> 00:15:15,041 No, I... I've just never met a bald fortune cookie before. 345 00:15:15,081 --> 00:15:17,111 Okay, I'll give you some time. 346 00:15:17,151 --> 00:15:19,711 Who's bald! 347 00:15:19,751 --> 00:15:20,711 Whoa, oh. 348 00:15:20,751 --> 00:15:22,881 Krieger, what's going on with the tactil-cane? 349 00:15:22,921 --> 00:15:23,981 Jesus, your brain waves 350 00:15:24,021 --> 00:15:25,021 are all over the place. 351 00:15:25,051 --> 00:15:26,221 - Is there a problem? - Yes. 352 00:15:26,251 --> 00:15:29,121 I was just condescended to by an elderly geek, 353 00:15:29,161 --> 00:15:31,721 and Lana was apparently using my coma bed 354 00:15:31,761 --> 00:15:32,831 as a singles bar. 355 00:15:32,861 --> 00:15:34,237 Well, technically, it was the hallway 356 00:15:34,261 --> 00:15:35,931 just outside your coma bed. 357 00:15:35,961 --> 00:15:36,961 How is that better? 358 00:15:37,001 --> 00:15:38,177 It's ten feet more respectful? 359 00:15:38,201 --> 00:15:39,377 Uh, new, better Cheryl here. 360 00:15:39,401 --> 00:15:42,041 Look, can we all just admit that seeing someone in a coma 361 00:15:42,071 --> 00:15:44,771 is intensely erotic? 362 00:15:44,811 --> 00:15:45,771 No. 363 00:15:45,811 --> 00:15:48,211 Man, it was so easy to remember the good stuff 364 00:15:48,241 --> 00:15:52,851 when he didn't interrupt it with his mouth and his face 365 00:15:52,881 --> 00:15:54,151 and his general being. 366 00:15:54,181 --> 00:15:57,481 Oh, well, I'm sorry for practicing a little self-care. 367 00:15:57,521 --> 00:16:00,051 Like the time I caught you practicing self-care 368 00:16:00,091 --> 00:16:01,091 in your office. 369 00:16:01,121 --> 00:16:02,721 You know I wage a constant battle 370 00:16:02,761 --> 00:16:03,621 against my impulses. 371 00:16:03,661 --> 00:16:05,961 Well, thank you, Onan the barbarian. 372 00:16:05,991 --> 00:16:07,131 Yeah, you got Bible burned. 373 00:16:07,161 --> 00:16:09,131 What in god's name is going on? 374 00:16:09,161 --> 00:16:11,431 I see sloppy positioning, uncovered zones, 375 00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:14,431 and that dress isn't doing your hips any favors, Lana. 376 00:16:14,471 --> 00:16:17,101 Well, at least my hips didn't produce a human disruption 377 00:16:17,141 --> 00:16:18,217 on the scale of an ice age. 378 00:16:18,241 --> 00:16:20,011 Whoa, wait a second. 379 00:16:20,041 --> 00:16:22,941 I've had my shakes in the fridge for months. 380 00:16:22,981 --> 00:16:24,087 Why did you suddenly get annoyed? 381 00:16:24,111 --> 00:16:25,911 - Dukes! Archer just made 382 00:16:25,951 --> 00:16:27,181 some little comment about it. 383 00:16:27,221 --> 00:16:30,051 It's like he doesn't even have to try to cause problems. 384 00:16:30,091 --> 00:16:32,051 Look, we had a great team dynamic going 385 00:16:32,091 --> 00:16:33,121 before he came back. 386 00:16:33,151 --> 00:16:34,167 So let's just roll it back 387 00:16:34,191 --> 00:16:36,821 to coma-o'clock and... oh, my god. 388 00:16:36,861 --> 00:16:37,891 Wait. 389 00:16:37,931 --> 00:16:39,931 Was everyone really happier 390 00:16:39,961 --> 00:16:41,031 without me? 391 00:16:41,061 --> 00:16:42,277 - No. - Is anybody really happy? 392 00:16:42,301 --> 00:16:45,101 No, it's not that we were happier without you. 393 00:16:45,131 --> 00:16:47,001 It's just that we became happier 394 00:16:47,041 --> 00:16:48,941 when you weren't arou... Oh, crap. 395 00:16:48,971 --> 00:16:50,071 That's the same thing. 396 00:16:56,141 --> 00:16:58,111 I would like four of your most 397 00:16:58,151 --> 00:17:00,111 stupidly expensive whiskeys. 398 00:17:00,151 --> 00:17:01,081 Sorry, sir, 399 00:17:01,121 --> 00:17:02,081 one drink per patron, 400 00:17:02,121 --> 00:17:03,227 and we only have beer and wine. 401 00:17:03,251 --> 00:17:05,251 - Beer and wine? What am I, 12? 402 00:17:05,291 --> 00:17:07,267 I'll deal with you when you become more sensible. 403 00:17:07,291 --> 00:17:09,991 - That'll be never, pal. - Next. 404 00:17:11,361 --> 00:17:14,091 Oh, Woodhouse, what happened to us? 405 00:17:14,131 --> 00:17:17,031 - Oh, shit. You're talking to rocks now? 406 00:17:17,071 --> 00:17:18,261 No, no, silly. 407 00:17:18,301 --> 00:17:20,831 Just... I was just looking for a real drink. 408 00:17:22,001 --> 00:17:24,101 You shining liquor angel. 409 00:17:25,241 --> 00:17:28,041 - See? Told you we'd catch up later. 410 00:17:28,081 --> 00:17:30,141 I missed the shit out of you. 411 00:17:30,181 --> 00:17:32,011 Yeah, well, that makes exactly one of you. 412 00:17:32,051 --> 00:17:33,181 What is with everybody? 413 00:17:33,211 --> 00:17:35,421 It's been three years, numb nuts. 414 00:17:35,451 --> 00:17:38,151 We've had a whole thing going without you. 415 00:17:38,191 --> 00:17:41,221 Can't you just make an effort to fit yourself in? 416 00:17:41,261 --> 00:17:43,121 Boom, phrasing, 417 00:17:43,161 --> 00:17:45,161 which we probably don't even say anymore. 418 00:17:45,191 --> 00:17:47,131 Look, I... I'll try and fit in, 419 00:17:47,161 --> 00:17:49,201 but what's with Lana and Methuselah? 420 00:17:49,231 --> 00:17:50,501 I've never seen her happier, 421 00:17:50,531 --> 00:17:54,171 and honestly, you two have a lot in common. 422 00:17:54,201 --> 00:17:56,201 - How do you figure? - Well, now you both have 423 00:17:56,241 --> 00:17:59,041 a lifelong relationship with a "Kane." 424 00:17:59,071 --> 00:18:00,311 - Ah-cha-cha! - Oh, right. 425 00:18:00,341 --> 00:18:02,311 Lana Ka... yeah. Okay, that's pretty solid. 426 00:18:02,341 --> 00:18:05,581 Well, look who stopped being such a bitch. 427 00:18:10,151 --> 00:18:11,251 All right, everyone. 428 00:18:11,291 --> 00:18:13,351 I'm sorry I've been a distraction, 429 00:18:13,391 --> 00:18:15,461 and while it pains me to say it, 430 00:18:15,491 --> 00:18:18,991 I will cede ground to you guys... for now... 431 00:18:19,031 --> 00:18:22,161 And I will accept a... 432 00:18:22,201 --> 00:18:25,201 I will accept a... 433 00:18:25,231 --> 00:18:26,331 Support role. 434 00:18:26,371 --> 00:18:29,141 You know, Archer, like Orpheus, 435 00:18:29,171 --> 00:18:31,501 you too have visited the land of the dead. 436 00:18:31,541 --> 00:18:34,371 Jesus, Cyril, if I needed someone to murder subtext, 437 00:18:34,411 --> 00:18:37,211 I'd dig up Ayn rand and stick a pen in her hand. 438 00:18:37,251 --> 00:18:40,051 Well, this is all quite inspiring, 439 00:18:40,081 --> 00:18:42,151 but it might have been more useful 440 00:18:42,181 --> 00:18:46,621 if the statue weren't already gone! 441 00:18:50,681 --> 00:18:53,011 - Yes, keep staring. It might reappear. 442 00:18:53,111 --> 00:18:55,141 Seal off the exits! Find him! 443 00:18:55,251 --> 00:18:58,981 And, uh, I support you enthusiastically, 444 00:18:59,081 --> 00:19:00,851 for... for that is who I am. 445 00:19:00,951 --> 00:19:02,121 Ugh, the incompetence! 446 00:19:02,221 --> 00:19:04,151 I can assure you, agent Bruchstein, 447 00:19:04,261 --> 00:19:06,991 nothing like this has ever happened before. 448 00:19:07,091 --> 00:19:08,321 Or will again. 449 00:19:08,431 --> 00:19:11,481 Interpol had its doubts, and I spoke up for you! 450 00:19:11,511 --> 00:19:14,351 Well, if you can get fired over this, 451 00:19:14,381 --> 00:19:16,051 I'm sure we can... 452 00:19:16,081 --> 00:19:17,521 Fired? Oh, no, no, no. 453 00:19:17,551 --> 00:19:21,291 Europe's labor laws are much too strong for that. 454 00:19:21,321 --> 00:19:24,121 - Reprimanded? - Not with my union. 455 00:19:24,161 --> 00:19:26,661 I have to check in with headquarters. 456 00:19:27,231 --> 00:19:28,331 Huh. 457 00:19:28,361 --> 00:19:30,931 And I thought we beat the communists. 458 00:19:30,971 --> 00:19:32,871 I need a drink. 459 00:19:34,401 --> 00:19:36,501 Krieger, you've been monitoring my brain waves 460 00:19:36,541 --> 00:19:38,441 and location through the tactil-cane, right? 461 00:19:38,471 --> 00:19:39,811 Yes, but not in a creepy way. 462 00:19:39,841 --> 00:19:43,141 Everything you do is by definition in a creepy way. 463 00:19:43,181 --> 00:19:45,241 - Hey, uncalled for! Also fair. 464 00:19:45,281 --> 00:19:47,181 If I look at that photo now, can you check 465 00:19:47,221 --> 00:19:49,181 if there were any places I saw Peregrine, 466 00:19:49,221 --> 00:19:51,321 even if I didn't consciously register it? 467 00:19:51,351 --> 00:19:53,091 Scanning for similar optic patterns. 468 00:19:54,191 --> 00:19:55,291 You saw him 16 times. 469 00:19:55,321 --> 00:19:56,591 - God damn it. - Huh. 470 00:19:56,621 --> 00:19:59,131 You never actually saw him anywhere near the statue. 471 00:19:59,161 --> 00:20:00,431 So that would only make sense 472 00:20:00,461 --> 00:20:03,001 if that's not the right photo. 473 00:20:04,071 --> 00:20:06,271 And after a double knee replacement, 474 00:20:06,301 --> 00:20:08,101 I finally got back to the squash cour... 475 00:20:09,301 --> 00:20:10,501 We got him! 476 00:20:10,541 --> 00:20:13,341 Uh, honey, bit of bad news here. 477 00:20:13,371 --> 00:20:16,281 That's actually the museum director. 478 00:20:16,311 --> 00:20:18,781 I'm quite well-known. 479 00:20:20,621 --> 00:20:22,451 Nighty-night, Peregrine. 480 00:20:22,481 --> 00:20:23,581 No, stop it! 481 00:20:23,621 --> 00:20:25,521 Huh, really wish I hadn't wasted 482 00:20:25,551 --> 00:20:27,321 that sleeping gas on myself now. 483 00:20:27,361 --> 00:20:28,361 Ow! 484 00:20:32,231 --> 00:20:33,661 Krieger, Bruchstein is Peregrine, 485 00:20:33,701 --> 00:20:35,561 in pursuit down the south corridor. 486 00:20:35,601 --> 00:20:38,461 And great thinking putting only one gas charge 487 00:20:38,501 --> 00:20:39,601 in the tactil-cane. 488 00:20:39,631 --> 00:20:41,271 Well, I didn't know you were gonna 489 00:20:41,301 --> 00:20:42,477 shoot yourself in the face with it. 490 00:20:42,501 --> 00:20:44,171 Always assume that! 491 00:20:46,271 --> 00:20:48,371 Ah, crap, evil bartender. 492 00:20:48,411 --> 00:20:50,111 No wonder he sucked. 493 00:20:51,351 --> 00:20:52,581 Give it up, Peregrine. 494 00:20:52,611 --> 00:20:54,551 You were supposed to find the decoy earlier 495 00:20:54,581 --> 00:20:57,481 to create the diversion, but you were too incompetent 496 00:20:57,521 --> 00:20:59,521 to do even that, amateurs! 497 00:20:59,551 --> 00:21:03,461 And that is our strength, you waffle-faced... 498 00:21:03,491 --> 00:21:05,531 Wait, you're still actually Belgian, right? 499 00:21:05,561 --> 00:21:08,461 - Yes! But I was raised in the states. 500 00:21:08,501 --> 00:21:11,431 You lambic-gargling Limburger dick cheese. 501 00:21:11,471 --> 00:21:13,401 Those are silly stereotypes. 502 00:21:13,431 --> 00:21:15,541 So are you guys Flemish or Walloon? 503 00:21:15,571 --> 00:21:17,601 That would help my specificity. 504 00:21:17,641 --> 00:21:19,547 - We gotta get closer. - All right, here's what we do. 505 00:21:19,571 --> 00:21:21,611 Archer, Cyril is tactical lead. 506 00:21:21,641 --> 00:21:24,511 I concede that a plan that comes out of your mouth 507 00:21:24,551 --> 00:21:26,511 has at least a theoretical possibility 508 00:21:26,551 --> 00:21:27,711 of not getting us killed. 509 00:21:27,751 --> 00:21:29,451 - Thanks, Archer. I'm sure it took a lot 510 00:21:29,481 --> 00:21:31,121 to almost not insult me. 511 00:21:31,151 --> 00:21:31,821 I know. 512 00:21:31,851 --> 00:21:33,521 - I mean, look at you. - Great. 513 00:21:33,561 --> 00:21:36,291 Now, Ray and I will flank, set up an enfilade. 514 00:21:36,321 --> 00:21:38,561 Lana and Pam on a delayed spearpoint. 515 00:21:38,591 --> 00:21:40,231 - Archer, you... - Don't say it. 516 00:21:40,261 --> 00:21:41,431 Provide suppressing fire. 517 00:21:41,461 --> 00:21:43,301 And there it is. 518 00:21:43,331 --> 00:21:45,531 In three, two, one. 519 00:21:45,571 --> 00:21:48,471 Suppressing fire! 520 00:21:48,501 --> 00:21:49,671 Wait, wait, wait. 521 00:21:49,701 --> 00:21:51,441 Why do they have gas masks? 522 00:22:04,421 --> 00:22:06,991 Go get 'em, Woodhouse. 523 00:22:14,261 --> 00:22:17,461 God, that smells worse than the break room salmon! 524 00:22:20,371 --> 00:22:21,471 Cyril, grab them. 525 00:22:21,501 --> 00:22:23,341 Or are you screwing with office fridge space 526 00:22:23,371 --> 00:22:24,971 for nothing? 527 00:22:28,281 --> 00:22:31,611 Jeezy Petes! 528 00:22:31,651 --> 00:22:34,411 Gravel got him. 529 00:22:34,451 --> 00:22:36,351 Archer! 530 00:22:40,291 --> 00:22:41,751 I wanted whiskey. 531 00:22:41,791 --> 00:22:44,621 I literally did not have any, you asshole! 532 00:22:44,661 --> 00:22:46,691 Then why am I still angry? 533 00:22:50,501 --> 00:22:52,401 God damn it. 534 00:22:55,501 --> 00:22:58,171 No! 535 00:23:00,511 --> 00:23:02,511 And they say art is use... wah! 536 00:23:02,541 --> 00:23:04,381 You did good, kid. 537 00:23:04,411 --> 00:23:05,381 Lana? 538 00:23:05,411 --> 00:23:07,381 Wait. 539 00:23:07,421 --> 00:23:09,351 - Go to her. - Uh-huh, I was. 540 00:23:09,381 --> 00:23:13,121 No, go to her because of my nobility. 541 00:23:14,291 --> 00:23:15,491 Ugh. 542 00:23:15,521 --> 00:23:18,291 Gravity, you utter bitch. 543 00:23:18,331 --> 00:23:20,061 Welcome back. 544 00:23:21,461 --> 00:23:23,061 Took you long enough.