1
00:00:08,767 --> 00:00:10,667
Doesn't she also have
No boys at forever?
2
00:00:10,601 --> 00:00:12,769
Don't you have an eating
disorder you need to attend to?
3
00:00:12,803 --> 00:00:16,907
Yeah, anyway, uh,
we could see the 4:00 or the 6:20.
4
00:00:16,941 --> 00:00:18,108
Oh, actually, that's no good.
5
00:00:18,142 --> 00:00:19,576
I'm meeting my friend
denise for a drink.
6
00:00:19,610 --> 00:00:21,478
Denise? Do I know denise?
7
00:00:21,512 --> 00:00:23,580
Yeah, you know, my old girlfriend.
Oh, my god. Gross.
8
00:00:23,614 --> 00:00:25,615
I can't even picture
you with a woman.
9
00:00:25,650 --> 00:00:26,983
Thank you.
10
00:00:27,018 --> 00:00:28,251
You had a girlfriend before mom?
11
00:00:28,286 --> 00:00:29,419
Try two.
12
00:00:29,453 --> 00:00:32,155
Trust me. I had plenty
of fun in my time.
13
00:00:32,189 --> 00:00:33,623
And then I met your mom.
14
00:00:33,658 --> 00:00:35,258
And thank you.
15
00:00:36,827 --> 00:00:39,496
So, uh, I guess she travels
around selling makeup
16
00:00:39,530 --> 00:00:40,830
For a cosmetics company.
17
00:00:40,865 --> 00:00:42,232
She's in town for a week.
18
00:00:42,266 --> 00:00:44,434
You mean she's like a
door-to-door salesman?
19
00:00:44,468 --> 00:00:45,869
If you were doing it,
20
00:00:45,903 --> 00:00:48,004
They'd call it a
dork-to-dork salesman.
21
00:00:48,039 --> 00:00:49,506
Ohh!
22
00:00:49,540 --> 00:00:51,841
My boy strikes like a rattlesnake!
23
00:00:51,876 --> 00:00:55,211
Oh, yeah? Well -- well, you...
24
00:00:55,246 --> 00:00:57,647
Wow. All right, well,
we can see the movie tomorrow.
25
00:00:57,682 --> 00:00:59,416
Come on. It's time for your lesson.
26
00:00:59,450 --> 00:01:03,019
You mean her second lesson,
because she just got schooled.
27
00:01:05,089 --> 00:01:06,356
What's wrong with me today?
28
00:01:06,390 --> 00:01:07,457
Shake it off, champ.
29
00:01:07,491 --> 00:01:08,892
It's not your day.
30
00:01:08,926 --> 00:01:10,593
Hey.
31
00:01:10,628 --> 00:01:12,028
Ay.
32
00:01:12,063 --> 00:01:14,664
Good morning, papi. Is it?
33
00:01:14,699 --> 00:01:17,567
Aw, you're still sad
because of that audition.
34
00:01:17,601 --> 00:01:20,170
That part was mine.
I was born to play tevye.
35
00:01:20,204 --> 00:01:22,005
Instead they give
it to rod jackson?
36
00:01:22,039 --> 00:01:23,707
What does he know from suffering?
37
00:01:23,741 --> 00:01:24,808
How we doing?
38
00:01:24,842 --> 00:01:26,042
A little better,
39
00:01:26,077 --> 00:01:28,545
But we're gonna go and throw
ice cream at the problem.
40
00:01:28,579 --> 00:01:31,247
Well, if that doesn't work,
this should do the trick.
41
00:01:31,282 --> 00:01:33,950
"what doesn't kill us
makes us stronger."
42
00:01:33,985 --> 00:01:35,285
We can hang this in your room.
43
00:01:35,319 --> 00:01:37,187
You can see it every morning,
start to internalize it.
44
00:01:37,221 --> 00:01:38,755
Pretty soon,
nothing will keep you down.
45
00:01:38,789 --> 00:01:40,523
But it's not true.
What are you talking about?
46
00:01:40,558 --> 00:01:42,659
Lots of stuff that doesn't
kill you makes you weaker.
47
00:01:42,693 --> 00:01:44,627
My friend's grandfather
had a heart attack.
48
00:01:44,662 --> 00:01:46,196
Now he needs a machine to breathe.
49
00:01:46,230 --> 00:01:47,731
I've seen him at the supermarket.
50
00:01:47,765 --> 00:01:49,966
Now he needs to drive one
of those little, like...
51
00:01:51,302 --> 00:01:52,535
Yeah, that's right. Be negative.
52
00:01:52,570 --> 00:01:55,305
It's just not a good poster, jay.
53
00:01:55,339 --> 00:01:57,273
You're only making me stronger.
54
00:01:58,248 --> 00:02:07,517
Sync by honeybunny
Resync for 720p by Baqinardo
www.addic7ed.com
55
00:02:10,021 --> 00:02:11,588
Did you pack the, uh,
bread for the ducks?
56
00:02:11,622 --> 00:02:12,922
Yes.
57
00:02:12,957 --> 00:02:14,891
Not the whole-wheat kind.
The ducks don't like that.
58
00:02:14,925 --> 00:02:16,493
They're ducks, mitchell.
They don't care.
59
00:02:16,527 --> 00:02:17,827
We both believe that animals
60
00:02:17,862 --> 00:02:19,696
Should play a big
part in lily's life.
61
00:02:19,730 --> 00:02:22,165
Having grown up on a farm,
I was surrounded by them.
62
00:02:22,199 --> 00:02:23,900
They were more like
brothers and sisters
63
00:02:23,934 --> 00:02:25,301
Than just, you ow, livestock.
64
00:02:26,404 --> 00:02:28,238
Delicious brothers and sisters.
65
00:02:28,272 --> 00:02:30,407
Life on a farm -- they know
what they're getting into.
66
00:02:31,542 --> 00:02:32,642
Eesh.
67
00:02:34,045 --> 00:02:35,845
Wait. Oh, it's the office.
68
00:02:35,880 --> 00:02:37,614
Don't answer it. I have to.
69
00:02:37,648 --> 00:02:39,549
It's like this every Saturday.
Just ignore it.
70
00:02:39,583 --> 00:02:41,117
Well, maybe it's
not that this time.
71
00:02:41,152 --> 00:02:43,253
Hello?
72
00:02:45,489 --> 00:02:46,923
Yeah.
73
00:02:54,398 --> 00:02:55,765
That's nice.
74
00:02:59,203 --> 00:03:00,603
Holy...
75
00:03:00,638 --> 00:03:03,239
Shel? You all right, buddy?
76
00:03:06,143 --> 00:03:08,011
Oh, there's four of them, mitchell!
77
00:03:08,045 --> 00:03:09,879
They're giving her
little duck kisses,
78
00:03:09,914 --> 00:03:11,281
And she -- oh, she's laughing!
79
00:03:11,315 --> 00:03:12,882
I can't believe
you're missing this.
80
00:03:12,917 --> 00:03:14,951
Well, why not, cam?
I've missed everything else.
81
00:03:14,985 --> 00:03:16,619
She rolled over when
I was in phoenix.
82
00:03:16,654 --> 00:03:18,421
She started scooting
en I was in court.
83
00:03:18,456 --> 00:03:20,723
Well, just tell them
you're not coming in.
84
00:03:20,758 --> 00:03:22,092
You do enough for them.
85
00:03:22,126 --> 00:03:25,628
Well, you know that,
I know that, you know?
86
00:03:25,663 --> 00:03:29,332
The only one who doesn't
know that is my sucky boss.
87
00:03:29,366 --> 00:03:31,668
He's the suckiest suck of all time.
88
00:03:31,702 --> 00:03:35,138
He's a miserable son
of a bitch who...
89
00:03:35,172 --> 00:03:39,876
May have heard
everything I just said.
90
00:03:46,407 --> 00:03:48,341
When are you getting
together with your gal pal?
91
00:03:48,376 --> 00:03:49,643
Actually, I was just
checking on that.
92
00:03:49,677 --> 00:03:50,977
She's supposed to
send me a message.
93
00:03:51,012 --> 00:03:53,013
Ohh. You're facebook friends.
94
00:03:53,080 --> 00:03:54,381
Sure am. Oh...
95
00:03:54,415 --> 00:03:57,250
She's one of my 447 friends.
96
00:03:57,285 --> 00:03:58,419
Everybody wants a slice.
97
00:03:58,853 --> 00:04:00,854
How long have you two been
in touch with each other?
98
00:04:00,889 --> 00:04:02,956
Uh, she tracked me
down about a year ago.
99
00:04:02,991 --> 00:04:05,326
Mm. Mm, mm.
100
00:04:05,360 --> 00:04:06,927
What? What's -- what's that sound?
101
00:04:06,961 --> 00:04:08,662
Mm. Nothing.
102
00:04:08,697 --> 00:04:10,731
Oh. There she is right now.
103
00:04:11,966 --> 00:04:16,103
"how about we meet
at le reve at 7:30?"
104
00:04:16,137 --> 00:04:17,938
Well, that sounds innocent enough.
105
00:04:17,972 --> 00:04:19,840
I mean, drinks with
an ex-girlfriend
106
00:04:19,874 --> 00:04:21,675
At an intimate french restaurant.
107
00:04:21,710 --> 00:04:22,843
Honey, you're doing that thing
108
00:04:22,877 --> 00:04:24,144
Where you say what
I want you to say
109
00:04:24,179 --> 00:04:26,213
But your tone seems mean.
110
00:04:26,247 --> 00:04:29,350
Let me guess -
denise isn't married.
111
00:04:29,384 --> 00:04:31,318
Recently divorced.
What's the big deal?
112
00:04:31,353 --> 00:04:33,987
Come on, phil.
You can't be that naive.
113
00:04:34,022 --> 00:04:36,657
Seriously, women in their 30s
on the internet are like --
114
00:04:36,691 --> 00:04:37,691
They're like ninjas.
115
00:04:37,726 --> 00:04:39,326
They get in their
little black outfits
116
00:04:39,361 --> 00:04:41,362
And try and sneak their
way into your marriage.
117
00:04:41,396 --> 00:04:42,696
That's not denise. Mm.
118
00:04:42,731 --> 00:04:44,665
Here, read some of her messages.
119
00:04:44,699 --> 00:04:45,799
You're gonna feel silly.
120
00:04:45,834 --> 00:04:47,701
Go ahead.
121
00:04:47,736 --> 00:04:49,670
"hey, phil. How's it goin'?"
122
00:04:49,704 --> 00:04:51,405
You can't add the sexy voice.
123
00:04:51,439 --> 00:04:52,906
"hi, phil. How's it going?"
124
00:04:52,941 --> 00:04:55,776
"so glad to hear
your neck is bette"
125
00:04:55,810 --> 00:04:57,277
Are you seriously jealous?
126
00:04:57,312 --> 00:04:59,079
no! I am not jealous at all.
127
00:04:59,114 --> 00:05:01,014
I just happen to know
women better than you do,
128
00:05:01,049 --> 00:05:02,983
And that woman wants a slice.
129
00:05:03,017 --> 00:05:04,752
Okay, just to prove
how wrong you are,
130
00:05:04,786 --> 00:05:06,653
I'm gonna invite her
over here for drinks.
131
00:05:06,688 --> 00:05:07,921
Fine with me.
132
00:05:07,956 --> 00:05:09,423
Just hope it's fine with denise.
133
00:05:09,457 --> 00:05:10,858
"gee, phil.
134
00:05:10,892 --> 00:05:12,893
I really had my heart
set on le reve."
135
00:05:12,927 --> 00:05:15,129
That voice doesn't bother me.
136
00:05:15,163 --> 00:05:17,030
Kind of like it!
137
00:05:17,065 --> 00:05:18,899
Well, has he been
acting weird around you?
138
00:05:18,933 --> 00:05:20,634
No, no. I've been
avoiding him all morning.
139
00:05:20,668 --> 00:05:22,269
So you don't even
know if he heard you.
140
00:05:22,303 --> 00:05:24,271
Well, that's why we're doing this.
141
00:05:24,305 --> 00:05:27,007
Hey, where are you?
I only have a half-hour for lunch.
142
00:05:28,810 --> 00:05:30,010
Hello, handsome.
143
00:05:30,044 --> 00:05:31,678
Okay, so, uh,
this is where it happened.
144
00:05:31,713 --> 00:05:33,447
Just, um, turn off the phone,
roll down the window,
145
00:05:33,481 --> 00:05:34,915
And we'll -- we'll see
if you can hear me.
146
00:05:34,949 --> 00:05:36,183
Okay.
147
00:05:37,385 --> 00:05:40,587
Go around! We're
re-creating a faux pas!
148
00:05:40,622 --> 00:05:41,789
Thank you!
149
00:05:41,823 --> 00:05:44,224
Okay. C-can you hear me now?
150
00:05:44,259 --> 00:05:46,360
Uh, yeah, but just barely.
Is this how loud you were talking?
151
00:05:46,394 --> 00:05:48,228
Uh, well, it might have
been a little bit louder.
152
00:05:48,263 --> 00:05:50,030
There was traffic.
I mean, I almost had to shout.
153
00:05:50,064 --> 00:05:51,365
You almost had to what? Shout.
154
00:05:51,399 --> 00:05:52,866
Little bit louder now. Shout!
155
00:05:52,901 --> 00:05:54,435
Little bit louder now. Shout!!
156
00:05:54,469 --> 00:05:56,437
* hey, hey, hey, hey *
157
00:05:56,471 --> 00:05:57,538
Really, cam?
158
00:05:57,572 --> 00:05:59,206
My job is at stake here and --
159
00:05:59,240 --> 00:06:00,507
Oh, w-who are we kidding?
160
00:06:00,542 --> 00:06:03,343
You can obviously hear me.
I am so screwed.
161
00:06:04,779 --> 00:06:06,613
Manny?
162
00:06:06,648 --> 00:06:08,148
Manny, come here a second, pal.
163
00:06:08,183 --> 00:06:09,316
Huh?
164
00:06:09,350 --> 00:06:10,684
I got some bad news, buddy.
165
00:06:10,718 --> 00:06:11,618
What iit?
166
00:06:11,653 --> 00:06:13,921
Well, there's no
easy way to say this.
167
00:06:15,023 --> 00:06:18,725
Shel turtlestein is dead.
168
00:06:18,760 --> 00:06:20,527
I was down here reading the paper,
169
00:06:20,562 --> 00:06:22,996
And I heard this commotion
up in your room, so...
170
00:06:23,031 --> 00:06:25,065
So naturally I go running up there.
171
00:06:25,099 --> 00:06:28,535
And this mangy raccoon had
busted through your screen.
172
00:06:28,570 --> 00:06:30,637
He must have scampered
up to where shel was.
173
00:06:32,907 --> 00:06:34,508
By the time I walked in,
he had him --
174
00:06:34,542 --> 00:06:36,577
The little bastard had him
by the neck, shaking him.
175
00:06:36,611 --> 00:06:39,446
Gravel's flying everywhere.
176
00:06:39,481 --> 00:06:40,547
He didn't even flinch.
177
00:06:40,582 --> 00:06:42,449
He just stared at me
with that smug look
178
00:06:42,484 --> 00:06:43,917
And then bolted.
179
00:06:43,952 --> 00:06:47,488
If only I'd have got here earlier.
180
00:06:47,522 --> 00:06:49,189
May I see the body?
181
00:06:49,224 --> 00:06:51,024
Baby, are you sure
that's a good idea?
182
00:06:51,059 --> 00:06:52,493
It's something I have to do.
183
00:06:55,263 --> 00:06:56,997
That's him. Sorry, pal.
184
00:06:57,031 --> 00:06:58,765
It just doesn' make any sense.
185
00:06:58,800 --> 00:07:00,267
Yep. Only the good die young.
186
00:07:00,301 --> 00:07:02,236
But in school we leaed
raccoons are nocturnal.
187
00:07:02,270 --> 00:07:03,604
They sleep during the day.
188
00:07:03,638 --> 00:07:05,506
They sure do,
and this one must've got up
189
00:07:05,540 --> 00:07:06,673
For a midnight snack.
190
00:07:06,708 --> 00:07:07,941
You know, we've all done that.
191
00:07:07,976 --> 00:07:09,276
I guess so. Yeah.
192
00:07:09,310 --> 00:07:10,577
It all adds up.
193
00:07:10,612 --> 00:07:12,579
I don't think I can
be in here right now.
194
00:07:12,614 --> 00:07:14,314
Too many memories.
195
00:07:14,349 --> 00:07:16,783
He'll be okay.
196
00:07:17,852 --> 00:07:19,520
You lie. What?
197
00:07:19,554 --> 00:07:20,654
I'm colombian.
198
00:07:20,688 --> 00:07:23,156
I know a fake crime
scene when I see one!
199
00:07:23,191 --> 00:07:26,126
I was hanging up the new poster.
200
00:07:26,160 --> 00:07:27,928
And it fell on top of him.
It was an accident.
201
00:07:27,962 --> 00:07:29,363
You have to tell him.
202
00:07:29,397 --> 00:07:30,998
No. I've been through this before.
203
00:07:31,032 --> 00:07:32,065
When mitchell was 9,
204
00:07:32,100 --> 00:07:33,901
I was suosed to take
care of his bird.
205
00:07:33,935 --> 00:07:36,036
It got out and flew into a fan.
206
00:07:36,070 --> 00:07:37,871
It was like a bloody pillow fight.
207
00:07:37,906 --> 00:07:40,240
My god. How many pets have
you killed? Just the two.
208
00:07:40,275 --> 00:07:42,242
I took the heat on the bird.
It was a big mistake.
209
00:07:42,277 --> 00:07:44,745
To this day, mitchell looks at me,
I see him thinking,
210
00:07:44,779 --> 00:07:46,780
"that's the guy who
killed fly-za minnelli."
211
00:07:46,814 --> 00:07:48,916
And what if he finds out?
Then what?
212
00:07:48,950 --> 00:07:51,919
You'll be the guy that killed
his pet and lied to him.
213
00:07:51,953 --> 00:07:54,521
He's not gonna find out,
because I covered my tracks.
214
00:07:54,556 --> 00:07:56,990
Okay.
215
00:07:58,026 --> 00:07:59,226
Fly-za minnelli?
216
00:07:59,260 --> 00:08:01,862
How did I not know
that kid was gay?
217
00:08:03,765 --> 00:08:06,166
Hey, luke! Big day for you, huh?
218
00:08:06,200 --> 00:08:07,501
Why?
219
00:08:07,535 --> 00:08:10,270
Because you get to meet
your real mom. What?
220
00:08:10,305 --> 00:08:13,407
We all made a pact we'd
deny it until you turned 21,
221
00:08:13,441 --> 00:08:15,509
But that's the real reason
222
00:08:15,543 --> 00:08:17,344
Dad's old girlfriend
is coming over.
223
00:08:17,378 --> 00:08:19,513
She's your mom,
and if she likes you,
224
00:08:19,547 --> 00:08:21,081
You'll go live with her.
225
00:08:21,115 --> 00:08:22,516
I'm not adopted.
226
00:08:22,550 --> 00:08:24,051
I'm asking mom.
227
00:08:24,085 --> 00:08:25,752
You mean mrs. Dunphy?
228
00:08:25,787 --> 00:08:27,554
She's not going to
tell you the truth.
229
00:08:27,589 --> 00:08:29,256
I-I-I'm not...
230
00:08:29,290 --> 00:08:32,025
I know. Unh!
231
00:08:34,295 --> 00:08:38,699
Just 'cause he called you
a dork-to-dork salesman?
232
00:08:38,733 --> 00:08:40,968
The empire strikes back.
233
00:08:41,002 --> 00:08:43,236
Raccoons have five toes.
234
00:08:43,271 --> 00:08:44,304
What's that?
235
00:08:44,339 --> 00:08:45,839
I don't mean to bother you.
236
00:08:45,873 --> 00:08:47,107
It's just confusing.
237
00:08:47,141 --> 00:08:49,643
The footprints in my
room only have four toes.
238
00:08:49,677 --> 00:08:51,878
You know, I bet I know wt happened.
239
00:08:51,913 --> 00:08:55,082
I'll bet he lost those
toes in a fight.
240
00:08:55,116 --> 00:08:57,551
And that guy looked like
he'd been in a brawl or two.
241
00:08:57,585 --> 00:08:59,019
One toe from each foot?
242
00:08:59,053 --> 00:09:00,053
Maybe.
243
00:09:00,088 --> 00:09:01,455
Y-you know, manny,
244
00:09:01,489 --> 00:09:03,690
I think the only thing
that's gonna get you
245
00:09:03,725 --> 00:09:05,492
To stop asking all these questions
246
00:09:05,526 --> 00:09:08,028
Is for you to have a little closure.
What do you mean?
247
00:09:08,062 --> 00:09:10,564
Well, I'd like to throw a
little memorial for shel.
248
00:09:10,598 --> 00:09:12,165
It'll be good for all of us.
249
00:09:12,200 --> 00:09:14,034
That way, we get our grief out,
250
00:09:14,068 --> 00:09:17,371
And then we never have to
talk about this ever...
251
00:09:17,405 --> 00:09:19,740
Ever again.
252
00:09:22,710 --> 00:09:24,745
hi!
253
00:09:24,779 --> 00:09:26,313
Oh, careful, there's a thing.
Ooh. That's a...
254
00:09:26,347 --> 00:09:27,981
good to see you.
255
00:09:28,016 --> 00:09:29,082
Hi!
256
00:09:29,117 --> 00:09:32,085
Hi! Oh, my gosh! Hi, I'm claire.
257
00:09:32,120 --> 00:09:34,054
You must be d-- o-kay.
258
00:09:34,088 --> 00:09:35,222
Whoa. Okay. Denise.
259
00:09:35,256 --> 00:09:36,857
Oh, and you're even prettier
260
00:09:36,891 --> 00:09:39,226
Than the pictures that
phil's always posting.
261
00:09:39,260 --> 00:09:40,494
Just a couple.
262
00:09:40,528 --> 00:09:43,597
Shut up. Every week.
He loves showing you off.
263
00:09:43,631 --> 00:09:45,232
My boyfriend likes
your acapulco pictures
264
00:09:45,266 --> 00:09:46,400
Probably a little too much.
265
00:09:47,702 --> 00:09:49,736
Well, thank your
boyfriend for me. Sure.
266
00:09:49,771 --> 00:09:50,904
Come on in. Plea.
267
00:09:50,938 --> 00:09:52,305
Oh, I brought you, um,
268
00:09:52,340 --> 00:09:55,308
Some lifting intensifier.
269
00:09:55,343 --> 00:09:56,309
Not that you need it.
270
00:09:56,344 --> 00:09:57,744
It's a limited edition, so...
271
00:09:57,779 --> 00:09:59,146
Thank you. Thank you.
272
00:09:59,180 --> 00:10:01,314
Oh, denise, I think you
might know these people.
273
00:10:01,349 --> 00:10:02,783
That's haley... Hi.
274
00:10:02,817 --> 00:10:03,984
...Alex, and --
275
00:10:04,018 --> 00:10:05,552
Luke! Ohh!
276
00:10:05,586 --> 00:10:08,689
I had curly hair just like
that when I was little.
277
00:10:09,891 --> 00:10:12,025
So? That doesn't mean anything!
278
00:10:14,896 --> 00:10:18,432
Why don't we, uh, come on in,
have a seat? Please.
279
00:10:18,466 --> 00:10:20,467
So, what was my dad
like in high school?
280
00:10:20,501 --> 00:10:22,936
Only the most amazing
breakdancer ever.
281
00:10:22,970 --> 00:10:24,604
Uh-oh. Don't fire it up.
282
00:10:24,639 --> 00:10:26,273
What? What? Uh-oh.
283
00:10:26,307 --> 00:10:27,941
Oh, no. Yeah.
284
00:10:27,975 --> 00:10:30,277
He had a boombox and a piece
of cardboard in his locker.
285
00:10:30,311 --> 00:10:32,446
And what was your dance name?
O-zone. Yeah.
286
00:10:32,480 --> 00:10:34,147
I drove him to a "star
search" audition.
287
00:10:34,182 --> 00:10:35,916
Which is totally political,
by the way.
288
00:10:36,050 --> 00:10:38,652
O-zone. That is dead-ass funny.
289
00:10:38,686 --> 00:10:40,120
I'm so calling you that.
290
00:10:40,154 --> 00:10:41,121
Thank you.
291
00:10:41,189 --> 00:10:43,223
Wow. You really lucked out.
292
00:10:43,257 --> 00:10:45,125
You have a beautiful wife... Ohh.
293
00:10:45,159 --> 00:10:46,960
...A gorgeous house,
and those kids.
294
00:10:46,994 --> 00:10:48,662
I could take luke home with me.
295
00:10:48,696 --> 00:10:50,731
Well, be my guest.
296
00:10:50,765 --> 00:10:52,065
Seriously. You go right ahead.
297
00:10:53,201 --> 00:10:54,134
No!
298
00:10:54,168 --> 00:10:56,036
I like it here!
299
00:10:56,070 --> 00:10:58,105
Unh!
300
00:10:58,139 --> 00:10:59,573
Alex, honey, will you go find out
301
00:10:59,607 --> 00:11:00,974
What's wrong with your brother?
302
00:11:01,008 --> 00:11:03,076
Okay.
303
00:11:03,111 --> 00:11:04,745
You know, um, it's okay,
304
00:11:04,779 --> 00:11:06,413
I think I'm just
gonna use the, um...
305
00:11:06,447 --> 00:11:07,681
Oh, yeah, of course.
306
00:11:07,715 --> 00:11:10,117
Down the hall, left-hand side.
You can't miss it.
307
00:11:10,151 --> 00:11:12,385
Thanks.
308
00:11:14,122 --> 00:11:15,922
Okay, she's fantastic. Yes?
309
00:11:15,957 --> 00:11:17,090
Yes. I feel awful.
310
00:11:19,861 --> 00:11:22,028
Who assumes the worst about people?
311
00:11:22,063 --> 00:11:24,631
I first noticed it seven
years - you're not.
312
00:11:24,665 --> 00:11:27,234
I'm such an idiot. Is it...
313
00:11:27,268 --> 00:11:28,635
Oh, I'll show you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
314
00:11:28,669 --> 00:11:31,872
Okay. Thanks.
315
00:11:33,674 --> 00:11:35,475
so, how are we gonna do this?
316
00:11:35,510 --> 00:11:37,711
I-I thought I'd just
point at the door,
317
00:11:37,745 --> 00:11:40,347
So I was thinking,
like -- I was thinking, too.
318
00:11:40,381 --> 00:11:41,915
Here...
319
00:11:41,949 --> 00:11:44,151
Is my hotel-room key.
320
00:11:44,185 --> 00:11:47,420
You can come by whenever you want.
321
00:11:53,963 --> 00:11:55,063
Funny? Yeah.
322
00:11:55,097 --> 00:11:57,132
Because I was on the
phone with my partner,
323
00:11:57,166 --> 00:11:59,252
Talking about how horrible
his boss was -- his.
324
00:12:00,102 --> 00:12:01,869
And then, uh, you pull up, so...
325
00:12:01,904 --> 00:12:03,271
Anyway, I'm glad I ran into you.
326
00:12:03,305 --> 00:12:05,473
I'm getting worried they're
gonna move up our court date.
327
00:12:05,507 --> 00:12:07,842
I-I need you to bust ass preparing.
328
00:12:07,876 --> 00:12:09,577
Because if they
call us on Monday --
329
00:12:09,611 --> 00:12:11,346
uh, you need to get that?
330
00:12:11,380 --> 00:12:13,915
No, no, it's -- it's fine.
I just, uh...
331
00:12:13,949 --> 00:12:16,050
Picture of my daughter
standing for the first time.
332
00:12:16,085 --> 00:12:17,618
Yeah, they do that. It's a big day.
333
00:12:17,653 --> 00:12:19,487
Anyway, I need you here tomorrow.
334
00:12:19,521 --> 00:12:21,322
Now, I know it's a Sunday, but, uh,
335
00:12:21,357 --> 00:12:23,224
You think you can be on time, okay?
336
00:12:24,560 --> 00:12:26,394
Actually, um...
337
00:12:26,428 --> 00:12:27,995
I-I have plans tomorrow.
338
00:12:28,030 --> 00:12:30,098
Uh, so I won't be here.
339
00:12:30,132 --> 00:12:33,267
I-I have plans to stay
at home with my family
340
00:12:33,302 --> 00:12:36,137
And do absolutely nothing, okay.
341
00:12:36,171 --> 00:12:38,206
But I will see you
on Monday. Mm-hmm.
342
00:12:38,240 --> 00:12:40,541
So -- so you're in charge now,
is that it?
343
00:12:40,576 --> 00:12:42,343
Well, I-I just figure if
my daughter can stand up,
344
00:12:42,378 --> 00:12:43,511
Then so can I.
345
00:12:43,545 --> 00:12:45,980
All right, look...
346
00:12:46,014 --> 00:12:47,849
We've all been working
hard lately, okay?
347
00:12:47,883 --> 00:12:49,083
But that's the job.
348
00:12:49,118 --> 00:12:50,551
So either come in tomorrow,
349
00:12:50,586 --> 00:12:51,919
Or don't bother coming back again.
350
00:12:54,723 --> 00:12:56,190
Okay.
351
00:13:01,530 --> 00:13:02,997
Hmm.
352
00:13:07,269 --> 00:13:09,604
Need the, uh, I.D. To... Uh-huh.
353
00:13:09,638 --> 00:13:11,806
...Make the elevator go
down to freedom!
354
00:13:13,008 --> 00:13:16,344
And this, to complete my set.
355
00:13:19,548 --> 00:13:23,418
"turtle. Reptile. Pet.
356
00:13:23,452 --> 00:13:27,288
Shel turtlestein was many things."
357
00:13:27,322 --> 00:13:29,424
I don't think I can do
this without crying.
358
00:13:29,458 --> 00:13:31,459
Maybe we should just
get to the cold cuts.
359
00:13:31,493 --> 00:13:34,862
But we want to hear it.
Jay, why don't you read it?
360
00:13:34,897 --> 00:13:37,398
You were with him at the end.
361
00:13:37,433 --> 00:13:39,033
Remember?
362
00:13:45,741 --> 00:13:47,642
"shel turtlestein was many things,
363
00:13:47,676 --> 00:13:49,310
"but above all, he was my friend.
364
00:13:49,344 --> 00:13:51,446
"when I didn't get a date
with fiona gunderson,
365
00:13:51,480 --> 00:13:52,914
"shel was there.
366
00:13:52,948 --> 00:13:54,849
"when I didn't get to
play the part of tevye,
367
00:13:54,883 --> 00:13:56,551
"shel was there.
368
00:13:56,585 --> 00:13:58,553
"and when a raccoon
broke into my room,
369
00:13:58,587 --> 00:14:01,255
"unfortunately, shel was there.
370
00:14:01,290 --> 00:14:02,723
"I said a lot of
things to my friend,
371
00:14:02,758 --> 00:14:05,326
"but the one thing I
never got to say was...
372
00:14:05,394 --> 00:14:06,427
Goodbye."
373
00:14:06,462 --> 00:14:07,929
Stop!
374
00:14:07,963 --> 00:14:09,997
I know what really
happened. You do?
375
00:14:10,032 --> 00:14:11,632
I left a bag of chips near my bed.
376
00:14:11,667 --> 00:14:13,234
The raccoon must have smelled it.
377
00:14:13,268 --> 00:14:15,470
It's my fault he's dead.
378
00:14:15,504 --> 00:14:18,272
sorry, shel.
379
00:14:18,307 --> 00:14:21,709
Jay, you don't have
anything to say to manny?
380
00:14:21,743 --> 00:14:24,879
yeah.
381
00:14:26,048 --> 00:14:28,449
Manny...
382
00:14:33,088 --> 00:14:34,422
Shel forgives you.
383
00:14:34,456 --> 00:14:37,024
Thank you.
384
00:14:38,393 --> 00:14:40,695
Oh, denise. Ha!
385
00:14:40,729 --> 00:14:43,464
These pictures are amazing.
Thank you.
386
00:14:43,499 --> 00:14:46,100
Wow. Sweetie, that perm.
387
00:14:46,134 --> 00:14:48,336
Technically,
it's a jheri curl. Ohh.
388
00:14:48,370 --> 00:14:49,871
I just love to takpictures.
389
00:14:49,905 --> 00:14:51,539
I took this one of myself today.
390
00:14:56,945 --> 00:14:59,180
No. No. That's the worst idea.
391
00:14:59,214 --> 00:15:00,414
No. No.
392
00:15:00,449 --> 00:15:02,083
Oh!
393
00:15:02,117 --> 00:15:04,118
What am I, raised
by a pack of wolves?
394
00:15:04,152 --> 00:15:05,887
Hey, come on, now.
395
00:15:05,921 --> 00:15:08,322
Honey...
396
00:15:08,357 --> 00:15:10,224
You weren't completely
wrong about denise.
397
00:15:10,259 --> 00:15:11,826
How's that? She wants me.
398
00:15:11,860 --> 00:15:14,896
To do what? It. Her.
399
00:15:14,930 --> 00:15:16,898
Oh. Oh, this is because
of the thing I said
400
00:15:16,932 --> 00:15:18,933
About facebook and that
erybody's hooking up,
401
00:15:18,967 --> 00:15:20,368
And now you're disappointed.
402
00:15:20,402 --> 00:15:22,603
No. She bit the air
right in front of me!
403
00:15:22,638 --> 00:15:23,905
Like that. What?
404
00:15:23,972 --> 00:15:25,673
And then look what
she tried to give me.
405
00:15:25,707 --> 00:15:27,041
Anything I can help with?
406
00:15:27,075 --> 00:15:29,243
No, I just - I can't
find my corkscrew.
407
00:15:29,278 --> 00:15:31,712
Ohh.
408
00:15:31,747 --> 00:15:32,947
Touch me. O-kay.
409
00:15:32,981 --> 00:15:34,515
Denise, I think,
somewhere along the line,
410
00:15:34,550 --> 00:15:35,616
You got the wrong idea.
411
00:15:35,651 --> 00:15:37,552
My head is full of wrong ideas.
412
00:15:37,586 --> 00:15:40,254
You have such great taste, claire.
413
00:15:40,289 --> 00:15:41,455
Thank you.
414
00:15:41,490 --> 00:15:44,325
I remember phil used to
have really good taste, too.
415
00:15:44,359 --> 00:15:46,093
Get a little bit of this.
Oh, here it is.
416
00:15:46,128 --> 00:15:48,596
Phil, would you mind grabbing
us a couple glasses? You betcha.
417
00:15:48,630 --> 00:15:50,765
Need me to grab anything? Nope!
418
00:15:50,799 --> 00:15:52,400
Okay, this is so wrong.
419
00:15:52,434 --> 00:15:54,702
I know. It's way more exciting
when she's in the room.
420
00:15:54,736 --> 00:15:55,603
No!
421
00:15:55,637 --> 00:15:57,371
I still have my cheerleader outfit.
422
00:15:57,406 --> 00:15:59,640
So do I, but this
still can't happen.
423
00:15:59,675 --> 00:16:01,242
When did that break?
424
00:16:01,276 --> 00:16:03,277
Why are you wussing out?!
425
00:16:03,312 --> 00:16:04,478
I never wussed in!
426
00:16:04,513 --> 00:16:06,581
What about all those things
you wrote on facebook?
427
00:16:06,615 --> 00:16:08,883
"how was your day?
My neck is so sore."
428
00:16:08,917 --> 00:16:10,551
Why do people keep adding
voices to these things?
429
00:16:10,586 --> 00:16:11,786
I didn't mean anything.
430
00:16:11,820 --> 00:16:13,788
are you telling me
that I wasted a year
431
00:16:13,822 --> 00:16:15,056
Of my life on this relationship?
432
00:16:15,090 --> 00:16:16,057
What relationship?
433
00:16:16,091 --> 00:16:17,792
How many other women
have you led on?
434
00:16:17,826 --> 00:16:19,126
Now I don't know!
435
00:16:19,161 --> 00:16:20,394
Phil?
436
00:16:23,165 --> 00:16:25,600
Phil, honey?
437
00:16:25,634 --> 00:16:27,435
Do you remember when
you broke your arm
438
00:16:27,469 --> 00:16:28,603
When we were first dating?
439
00:16:28,637 --> 00:16:31,505
Yeah, uh, when I
slipped on the ice.
440
00:16:31,540 --> 00:16:32,807
Right. That's so weird.
441
00:16:32,841 --> 00:16:35,009
Because in this picture,
you're sitting with denise,
442
00:16:35,043 --> 00:16:36,644
And you have a broken arm, so...
443
00:16:36,678 --> 00:16:38,679
Yeah. That's -- that's weird.
444
00:16:38,714 --> 00:16:40,948
So you were still dating her
when you started dating me?
445
00:16:40,983 --> 00:16:42,249
No. Phil?
446
00:16:42,284 --> 00:16:44,118
Yeah. Maybe.
Just, there was a time --
447
00:16:44,152 --> 00:16:45,519
A little overlap when, uh,
448
00:16:45,554 --> 00:16:47,655
I was trying to break
things off with denise.
449
00:16:47,689 --> 00:16:49,490
Uh-huh. You took me to santa fe!
450
00:16:49,524 --> 00:16:50,791
Santa fe.
451
00:16:50,826 --> 00:16:52,660
Phil, you told me
that was your father.
452
00:16:52,694 --> 00:16:55,796
Okay, I know the pain is fresh,
but the lie is really old.
453
00:16:55,831 --> 00:16:59,634
You know, this was a mistake.
I'm gonna leave.
454
00:16:59,668 --> 00:17:02,269
Claire, if I were you,
I would kick him out.
455
00:17:02,304 --> 00:17:03,437
Maybe he'd appreciate you more
456
00:17:03,472 --> 00:17:05,506
After he spent a lonely
night in a hotel.
457
00:17:05,540 --> 00:17:06,774
At the radisson.
458
00:17:06,808 --> 00:17:08,142
By the airport.
459
00:17:10,679 --> 00:17:13,047
You quit?! Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm. It was amazing.
460
00:17:13,081 --> 00:17:14,715
No, no, this is the new me, cam.
461
00:17:14,750 --> 00:17:17,385
I am not letting people
run my life anymore.
462
00:17:17,419 --> 00:17:18,886
I should be nervous,
but I'm -- I'm not.
463
00:17:18,920 --> 00:17:19,887
I'm excited for you. Yes!
464
00:17:19,921 --> 00:17:22,256
It's exciting. It's exciting.
465
00:17:22,290 --> 00:17:25,292
Because you followed your heart,
and that is worth celebrating.
466
00:17:25,327 --> 00:17:27,094
Cam, I just feel -- ha-ha! --
467
00:17:27,129 --> 00:17:30,297
So liberated.
468
00:17:30,332 --> 00:17:31,465
Hey!
469
00:17:31,500 --> 00:17:33,067
And I'm not picking it up.
470
00:17:33,101 --> 00:17:34,301
Ooh! I like this guy!
471
00:17:34,336 --> 00:17:35,970
I do, too. I mean,
y-yes, we'll have to --
472
00:17:36,004 --> 00:17:37,471
We'll have to cut
back a little bit.
473
00:17:37,506 --> 00:17:38,839
But isn't it worth it if you feel
474
00:17:38,874 --> 00:17:40,741
Like you're living your
life for the first time?
475
00:17:40,776 --> 00:17:42,610
Totally. Oh. What were
we even waiting for?
476
00:17:42,644 --> 00:17:44,045
You will go back to teaching music,
477
00:17:44,079 --> 00:17:47,181
And then I'll -- I'll just fin.
478
00:17:47,215 --> 00:17:48,616
And until then, all we need to do
479
00:17:48,650 --> 00:17:49,917
Is just sit back
480
00:17:49,951 --> 00:17:52,753
And watch this little
miracle here dazzle us.
481
00:17:52,788 --> 00:17:53,821
I'm tingling.
482
00:17:53,855 --> 00:17:55,423
I am, too.
483
00:17:55,457 --> 00:17:58,125
It's like my heart is full for
the first time in forever.
484
00:17:58,160 --> 00:18:00,428
Oh, god, it's really pounding.
485
00:18:00,462 --> 00:18:02,496
It's like I feel the weight
of endless possibilities
486
00:18:02,531 --> 00:18:04,331
Just sitting on my chest.
487
00:18:04,366 --> 00:18:05,900
She is not doing anything, cam.
488
00:18:05,934 --> 00:18:07,735
You're not panicking,
are you? Of course I am panicking!
489
00:18:07,769 --> 00:18:09,003
No! Don't panic.
If you panic, I panic!
490
00:18:09,037 --> 00:18:11,572
I just quit my job! Cam!
491
00:18:11,606 --> 00:18:12,907
Oh, my god, mitchell,
I am used to nice things!
492
00:18:12,941 --> 00:18:14,241
What are we gonna do?!
493
00:18:14,276 --> 00:18:15,810
Okay, no, no,
just calm -- calm down.
494
00:18:15,844 --> 00:18:17,678
This is what we're gonna do.
I am going to --
495
00:18:17,713 --> 00:18:19,246
I'm gonna do what
I'm trained to do.
496
00:18:19,281 --> 00:18:20,915
I am going to lie,
grovel, debase myself
497
00:18:20,949 --> 00:18:22,183
Until I get what I want.
498
00:18:22,217 --> 00:18:23,484
I am a lawyer, damn it.
499
00:18:23,518 --> 00:18:25,753
Mitchell!
500
00:18:25,787 --> 00:18:26,987
No.
501
00:18:27,022 --> 00:18:28,355
Oh, no, you're right -- the tie.
502
00:18:28,390 --> 00:18:30,825
No, we'll -- we'll find
something better for you,
503
00:18:30,859 --> 00:18:32,760
Something that works for all of us.
504
00:18:32,794 --> 00:18:34,995
There's no plan "b" here, cam.
505
00:18:35,030 --> 00:18:36,263
We have a mortgage. We have --
506
00:18:36,298 --> 00:18:39,200
We have a - a child
to support. I --
507
00:18:39,234 --> 00:18:41,335
Hey. It's gonna be okay.
508
00:18:41,369 --> 00:18:43,471
We're gonna figure it out.
509
00:18:43,505 --> 00:18:46,073
I just want you to be happy,
and you will be happy.
510
00:18:47,109 --> 00:18:50,077
And that is something
worth toasting.
511
00:18:51,513 --> 00:18:52,913
Let's just drink the cheap stuff
512
00:18:52,948 --> 00:18:54,749
'cause we might have
to sell that bottle.
513
00:18:58,854 --> 00:19:02,289
It's hard to sleep in a bed of lies,
isn't it, jay?
514
00:19:02,324 --> 00:19:04,358
Kids get over these
things pretty quick.
515
00:19:04,392 --> 00:19:06,627
He's probably sleeping
like a baby right now.
516
00:19:06,661 --> 00:19:08,429
I'm sure he's wide awake...
517
00:19:08,463 --> 00:19:09,964
Full of guilt.
518
00:19:09,998 --> 00:19:12,700
Well, I'm going to sleep.
519
00:19:21,176 --> 00:19:23,177
Damn it!
520
00:19:27,716 --> 00:19:29,483
Hello, jay.
521
00:19:30,585 --> 00:19:31,719
What are you doing up?
522
00:19:31,753 --> 00:19:33,687
Waiting. Waiting for what?
523
00:19:33,722 --> 00:19:34,855
The truth.
524
00:19:34,890 --> 00:19:36,590
It wasn't a raccoon, was it?
525
00:19:36,625 --> 00:19:39,560
Oh, all right, you got me.
I killed shel.
526
00:19:39,594 --> 00:19:42,129
All right? I'm sorry.
It was an accident.
527
00:19:42,164 --> 00:19:43,397
Why didn't you just tell me?
528
00:19:43,431 --> 00:19:45,966
Cause I didn't want you
to be upset with me.
529
00:19:46,001 --> 00:19:48,536
You and I got off to a rocky start.
530
00:19:48,570 --> 00:19:50,237
But lately it's been pretty good.
531
00:19:50,238 --> 00:19:51,839
I was afraid I'd mess all that up
532
00:19:51,873 --> 00:19:54,241
If you knew that I was the
one that killed your pet.
533
00:19:54,276 --> 00:19:55,576
Now you're the guy
who killed my pet
534
00:19:55,610 --> 00:19:56,777
And made a stupid lie about it.
535
00:19:56,812 --> 00:19:58,045
Well, I don't think it was stupid.
536
00:19:58,079 --> 00:19:59,280
I thought it was pretty clever.
537
00:20:00,448 --> 00:20:03,617
Look, I s just trying
to avoid past miakes.
538
00:20:03,652 --> 00:20:05,052
Look...
539
00:20:05,086 --> 00:20:08,522
I know I can't make things
all better right now,
540
00:20:10,225 --> 00:20:11,625
Maybe.
541
00:20:11,660 --> 00:20:14,361
Get some rest.
542
00:20:14,396 --> 00:20:16,730
Since we're confessing things...
543
00:20:16,765 --> 00:20:18,866
You know that scratch on your car?
544
00:20:18,900 --> 00:20:20,734
The one that can't
be buffed out? Yeah.
545
00:20:20,769 --> 00:20:22,503
You should probably
know how it happened.
546
00:20:22,537 --> 00:20:23,737
I know how it happened.
547
00:20:25,040 --> 00:20:26,907
Raccoon did it.
548
00:20:28,543 --> 00:20:29,911
Good night, jay. Good night, kid.
549
00:20:32,651 --> 00:20:36,352
Best thing I ever did was quit a miserable
job and start my own business. thanks, dad.
550
00:20:36,387 --> 00:20:37,754
Now, it's not gonna be easy,
551
00:20:37,788 --> 00:20:39,455
But that's why gloria and I want
to give you a little something
552
00:20:39,490 --> 00:20:41,124
To help you through it.
553
00:20:41,408 --> 00:20:42,842
No, dad, I can't.
554
00:20:42,876 --> 00:20:44,710
No, I want to, mitch.
555
00:20:44,745 --> 00:20:46,746
Okay, but, I mean,
a-as soon as I'm back on my feet,
556
00:20:46,780 --> 00:20:48,014
I-I really want to --
557
00:20:48,048 --> 00:20:51,417
Oh. Oh. Dad. No, you --
558
00:20:51,451 --> 00:20:53,319
You tried to give
me this 20 years ago
559
00:20:53,353 --> 00:20:54,387
When my pet snake died.
560
00:20:54,421 --> 00:20:56,289
I did? Yes.
561
00:20:56,323 --> 00:20:57,490
Zsa-zsa ga-boa.
562
00:20:57,524 --> 00:20:59,025
Oh, that's adorable.
563
00:20:59,059 --> 00:21:01,627
And you really didn't
know that he was gay?
564
00:21:01,662 --> 00:21:04,664
I must have, right?
565
00:21:04,665 --> 00:21:07,665
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