1 00:00:01,100 --> 00:00:03,218 ♪ Oh, Super Bowl ♪ 2 00:00:03,259 --> 00:00:06,876 ♪ The plays, the plays, they're calling ♪ 3 00:00:06,994 --> 00:00:09,806 ♪ From end to end ♪ 4 00:00:09,986 --> 00:00:11,020 ♪ And... ♪ 5 00:00:11,106 --> 00:00:12,942 - Oh! - What happened? 6 00:00:13,028 --> 00:00:15,879 Do I call the nine and the one and the other one? 7 00:00:15,965 --> 00:00:19,050 Why is my fridge filled with non-football-related foods 8 00:00:19,135 --> 00:00:20,151 on Super Bowl Sunday? 9 00:00:20,237 --> 00:00:21,987 There's no room for my Jerry Rice pudding. 10 00:00:22,073 --> 00:00:23,389 Haley's baby shower is today. 11 00:00:23,437 --> 00:00:24,974 I cleared it with you, like, a month ago. 12 00:00:25,059 --> 00:00:26,395 Can't you just record the game? 13 00:00:26,481 --> 00:00:27,997 And what? Watch it tomorrow morning? 14 00:00:28,149 --> 00:00:30,879 Look. There's no reason a football game and a baby shower 15 00:00:30,965 --> 00:00:32,261 can't co-exist under the same roof. 16 00:00:32,347 --> 00:00:33,497 Maybe you won't get in my way. 17 00:00:33,583 --> 00:00:35,020 Baby showers are pretty tame. 18 00:00:35,098 --> 00:00:38,716 Who's ready for a baby show-ahhh?! 19 00:00:38,809 --> 00:00:39,844 Ha! 20 00:00:46,744 --> 00:00:49,582 *MODERN FAMILY* Season 10 Episode 15 Title : "SuperShowerBabyBowl" 21 00:00:49,668 --> 00:00:51,392 Synchronized by srjanapala 22 00:00:53,451 --> 00:00:54,451 Mmm. 23 00:00:56,364 --> 00:00:59,606 I'm making White Russians for the baby show-ahhh. 24 00:00:59,692 --> 00:01:02,356 A little liquid courage makes all the naughty games better. 25 00:01:02,477 --> 00:01:05,059 I think you're mixing up baby shower with bridal shower. 26 00:01:05,145 --> 00:01:07,817 Well, my bridal shower did take place when I was pregnant. 27 00:01:07,903 --> 00:01:09,254 The cops even showed up. 28 00:01:09,340 --> 00:01:10,731 Of course, they weren't real cops. 29 00:01:10,817 --> 00:01:13,254 One of them rubbed his butt against my belly. 30 00:01:13,348 --> 00:01:14,411 Don't tell Haley. 31 00:01:14,526 --> 00:01:16,325 - Or how about, "Don't tell Alex"? - Mm. 32 00:01:16,676 --> 00:01:18,746 Super Bowl squares here! 33 00:01:18,832 --> 00:01:20,575 Get your Super Bowl squares! 34 00:01:20,688 --> 00:01:21,918 No. Not this again. 35 00:01:22,004 --> 00:01:23,522 Uh, actually, we've made some refinements. 36 00:01:23,607 --> 00:01:25,123 Last year, the price was a little high. 37 00:01:25,208 --> 00:01:26,391 The year before, too low. 38 00:01:26,477 --> 00:01:28,989 So this year, we've landed on the perfect number. 39 00:01:29,169 --> 00:01:30,879 $3.75 per square. 40 00:01:30,965 --> 00:01:32,497 I'll do what I did last year. 41 00:01:32,645 --> 00:01:34,996 - Give me 11 squares. - Okay. Easy enough. 42 00:01:35,082 --> 00:01:37,395 - Um... - Uh... 43 00:01:37,481 --> 00:01:41,122 No. No Super Bowl math on the baby shower side. 44 00:01:41,208 --> 00:01:42,434 Go over there. 45 00:01:42,708 --> 00:01:44,848 I'm telling you, you look cute. 46 00:01:44,944 --> 00:01:47,028 You know what's not cute? Lying to me. 47 00:01:47,443 --> 00:01:49,356 This gets better once they come out, right? 48 00:01:49,442 --> 00:01:51,946 - What happened? - Well, my last pair of jeans exploded, 49 00:01:52,032 --> 00:01:54,356 I can't wear skirts because my thighs are growing hair 50 00:01:54,456 --> 00:01:55,672 faster than I can shave it, 51 00:01:55,758 --> 00:01:58,247 so I'm wearing ski pants to my own baby shower. 52 00:01:58,333 --> 00:01:59,528 I'm telling you, no one's 53 00:01:59,614 --> 00:02:01,098 - even gonna notice. - Ohh... 54 00:02:02,747 --> 00:02:03,910 What's that sound? It's like 55 00:02:03,996 --> 00:02:06,160 when the doors on the starship Enterprise open. 56 00:02:06,246 --> 00:02:08,137 Hey, you guys want to buy a Super Bowl square? 57 00:02:08,223 --> 00:02:09,356 Only $3.75. 58 00:02:09,442 --> 00:02:10,926 Cool. Can I take three squares? 59 00:02:11,012 --> 00:02:12,583 Yeah, I need something good today, too. 60 00:02:12,669 --> 00:02:14,004 We'll split five squares. 61 00:02:14,090 --> 00:02:16,293 Uh... do you have quarters? 62 00:02:16,414 --> 00:02:17,530 Oh, I don't carry change 63 00:02:17,646 --> 00:02:19,942 since the last time I got struck by lightning. 64 00:02:23,114 --> 00:02:24,450 Hello, Phillip. 65 00:02:24,867 --> 00:02:26,231 Hello, Manuel. 66 00:02:26,446 --> 00:02:27,903 Against my better judgment, 67 00:02:27,989 --> 00:02:30,174 I wrote a part for Phil in my new movie. 68 00:02:30,343 --> 00:02:32,993 Things got heated, words were exchanged, 69 00:02:33,133 --> 00:02:36,043 which is surprising, considering he had a mouthful of scenery. 70 00:02:36,174 --> 00:02:37,198 Actors. 71 00:02:37,284 --> 00:02:39,534 Writers. They think they're so great. 72 00:02:39,650 --> 00:02:41,367 "Oh, my words are so precious." 73 00:02:41,453 --> 00:02:42,778 Try listening for once. 74 00:02:42,864 --> 00:02:45,262 Maybe you'll learn how humans actually talk. 75 00:02:45,598 --> 00:02:47,770 Wait, is it... Is it "talk" or "speak"? 76 00:02:47,856 --> 00:02:49,208 Oh, that's right. 77 00:02:49,294 --> 00:02:50,978 No one cares! 78 00:02:51,064 --> 00:02:54,049 Hello, hello. I'm here for the Super Bowl. 79 00:02:54,135 --> 00:02:55,794 - And I am here for the baby shower. - Okay, yep. 80 00:02:55,879 --> 00:02:57,762 I'm here for some sort of punishment, I think. 81 00:02:57,848 --> 00:02:59,373 - Hmm. - Lily and her friend, Christina, 82 00:02:59,458 --> 00:03:00,736 got into a huge fight. 83 00:03:00,822 --> 00:03:03,590 And I was hoping we could have the girls sit down and talk it out. 84 00:03:03,676 --> 00:03:05,528 But Mitchell said "no," Christina's in the wrong. 85 00:03:05,613 --> 00:03:07,747 And apparently, Mitchell's the law. 86 00:03:07,833 --> 00:03:11,293 He is. Lily, you're very lucky to have such a wise papa. 87 00:03:11,379 --> 00:03:13,309 - Mm-hmm. - Assistant District Attorney. 88 00:03:13,395 --> 00:03:14,801 Pritchett is a hero. 89 00:03:14,887 --> 00:03:17,223 Huh. So this one thinks you're cool now? 90 00:03:17,309 --> 00:03:19,411 Okay, Gloria loves crime stories, 91 00:03:19,497 --> 00:03:21,254 especially women who kill their husbands. 92 00:03:21,403 --> 00:03:24,395 And I recently prosecuted the Bel Air Black Widow. 93 00:03:24,481 --> 00:03:26,458 She came to court every single day. 94 00:03:26,596 --> 00:03:28,770 We find the defendant guilty. 95 00:03:28,856 --> 00:03:31,098 Yes! Whoop, whoop! 96 00:03:31,184 --> 00:03:34,059 Hey, Counselor. This isn't over. 97 00:03:34,145 --> 00:03:35,833 Lady, you're like me in high school, 98 00:03:35,919 --> 00:03:38,282 cause you ain't gonna be coming out for 17 years! 99 00:03:38,368 --> 00:03:40,676 Boom goes the dynamite! 100 00:03:42,169 --> 00:03:45,283 Cam, have a bowl of my famous chili. 101 00:03:45,386 --> 00:03:47,174 I didn't know you made chili. 102 00:03:47,510 --> 00:03:49,416 I know all about Jay's damn chili. 103 00:03:49,502 --> 00:03:51,893 We talked about it last year on this very day. 104 00:03:52,048 --> 00:03:53,588 Promises were made. 105 00:03:53,674 --> 00:03:55,698 Next year, I'm getting you your own football chair 106 00:03:55,784 --> 00:03:57,801 and you're gonna help me make my famous chili. 107 00:03:57,957 --> 00:03:59,407 5:00 a.m. 108 00:03:59,493 --> 00:04:02,143 Be there or be square. 109 00:04:02,351 --> 00:04:04,634 You know, I never entirely felt Jay's approval, 110 00:04:04,720 --> 00:04:06,303 so, this was a big step for us. 111 00:04:06,389 --> 00:04:07,505 I counted the days. 112 00:04:07,644 --> 00:04:08,823 Then Super Bowl Eve, 113 00:04:08,909 --> 00:04:11,151 I went and I bought the finest chili thickeners... 114 00:04:11,237 --> 00:04:13,321 Corn flour and potato flour. 115 00:04:13,407 --> 00:04:15,908 And I showed up an hour before dawn. 116 00:04:16,205 --> 00:04:19,237 I called Jay's cell as to not startle Gloria. 117 00:04:19,388 --> 00:04:20,737 Hey, what's up? 118 00:04:20,916 --> 00:04:23,416 He had no idea why I was calling. 119 00:04:23,532 --> 00:04:26,250 Clearly promises made didn't mean as much to him. 120 00:04:26,373 --> 00:04:27,658 But I couldn't let him know that. 121 00:04:27,744 --> 00:04:30,323 Oh, uh, Jay, is th... Is that you? 122 00:04:30,556 --> 00:04:32,580 I-I must... I must've butt-dialed you. 123 00:04:32,666 --> 00:04:34,084 Why else would I be calling you so early... 124 00:04:34,169 --> 00:04:35,846 on a regular Sunday morning? 125 00:04:35,949 --> 00:04:37,131 Sorry. 126 00:04:37,232 --> 00:04:38,648 I felt like a jilted lover 127 00:04:38,765 --> 00:04:41,908 standing on his porch, holding those beautiful flours. 128 00:04:43,565 --> 00:04:46,816 - Oh. - You can't hide in here all day. 129 00:04:46,902 --> 00:04:48,152 To me, you've never been hotter, 130 00:04:48,238 --> 00:04:49,799 and I've seen you hitchhike in a bikini. 131 00:04:49,885 --> 00:04:51,001 There you are. 132 00:04:51,087 --> 00:04:53,393 I'm sorry you're having a bad day, uh... 133 00:04:53,535 --> 00:04:56,377 but I thought you should know, I invited Danielle. 134 00:04:56,463 --> 00:04:58,811 Danielle? Ugh, she's so annoying. 135 00:04:58,897 --> 00:05:01,408 Everything she says sounds like a question? 136 00:05:01,501 --> 00:05:02,717 But it's not? 137 00:05:02,803 --> 00:05:04,420 Yeah, but she's in her, like, 138 00:05:04,506 --> 00:05:06,393 thousandth month of pregnancy. 139 00:05:06,479 --> 00:05:07,562 Oh, my God. 140 00:05:07,648 --> 00:05:09,261 That means I won't be the grossest preggo here. 141 00:05:09,346 --> 00:05:12,031 Bless you. Oh. 142 00:05:12,148 --> 00:05:13,220 Thanks. 143 00:05:13,347 --> 00:05:15,063 And thanks for inviting me today. 144 00:05:15,149 --> 00:05:16,948 Of course. You're the baby's father. 145 00:05:17,034 --> 00:05:18,557 Yeah, but it's a family thing, 146 00:05:18,643 --> 00:05:20,713 and I don't always feel like I belong. 147 00:05:20,799 --> 00:05:22,104 Sometimes they look at me like 148 00:05:22,190 --> 00:05:23,869 the proverbial bird in the punch bowl. 149 00:05:24,862 --> 00:05:26,158 Almost. 150 00:05:26,475 --> 00:05:28,237 Uh, three times... 151 00:05:28,323 --> 00:05:29,800 I'm sorry, but every way you look at it, 152 00:05:29,885 --> 00:05:30,963 Dylan comes up short. 153 00:05:31,049 --> 00:05:33,026 And Haley's totally getting rooked. 154 00:05:33,915 --> 00:05:35,963 Oh! Okay, well, that's interesting. 155 00:05:36,034 --> 00:05:38,065 Um, they lost track of the Black Widow at the county jail. 156 00:05:38,150 --> 00:05:39,846 - She escaped? - Mm-hmm. 157 00:05:39,997 --> 00:05:42,014 Are you scared? What?! 158 00:05:42,139 --> 00:05:43,656 Exactly! 159 00:05:43,742 --> 00:05:45,713 - She should be scared of you. - Mm. 160 00:05:45,828 --> 00:05:47,624 If she's smart, that young lady 161 00:05:47,710 --> 00:05:50,083 - will run and keep running. - Mm-hmm. 162 00:05:52,622 --> 00:05:54,052 What spice is in here? 163 00:05:54,138 --> 00:05:55,505 Is it... Is that dill? 164 00:05:55,595 --> 00:05:56,811 Why the hell is dill in here? 165 00:05:56,897 --> 00:05:58,599 It's a... It's a catastrophe. 166 00:06:03,959 --> 00:06:06,458 So, I'm just gonna repurpose some of this hair 167 00:06:06,544 --> 00:06:08,419 to cover the bald spot and zits... 168 00:06:08,505 --> 00:06:11,880 - Zits?! - And "zits" gonna look amazing. 169 00:06:11,967 --> 00:06:13,383 Ta da! 170 00:06:13,497 --> 00:06:14,885 - Ta da?! - Yeah. 171 00:06:14,970 --> 00:06:16,974 I have a huge gut and a comb-over. 172 00:06:17,060 --> 00:06:19,151 I look like a divorced dentist. 173 00:06:20,553 --> 00:06:22,021 Oh, Danielle! 174 00:06:22,107 --> 00:06:24,177 You look so good. Why? 175 00:06:24,263 --> 00:06:27,310 It's the magic of pregnancy? #Blessed? 176 00:06:27,645 --> 00:06:28,794 What the hell?! 177 00:06:28,880 --> 00:06:31,069 Alex said it was okay if I came early? 178 00:06:31,264 --> 00:06:33,616 Haley, I'm so happy for you? 179 00:06:33,702 --> 00:06:35,163 I need Dylan. Where is Dylan? 180 00:06:35,249 --> 00:06:36,545 Where's Dylan? 181 00:06:37,820 --> 00:06:39,737 Haley's not gonna find Dylan. 182 00:06:39,877 --> 00:06:40,953 He's gone, 183 00:06:41,039 --> 00:06:43,074 and it's everybody's fault! 184 00:06:44,587 --> 00:06:47,048 What is up with all the funeral faces? 185 00:06:47,134 --> 00:06:48,359 Come on, people, this is supposed to be 186 00:06:48,444 --> 00:06:50,420 - a baby show-ahhh. - Don't say "show-ahhh". 187 00:06:50,506 --> 00:06:52,007 Nobody wants it. 188 00:06:53,458 --> 00:06:55,678 Okay. So, Dylan misunderstood 189 00:06:55,764 --> 00:06:58,491 a bunch of the things he heard us say, got upset, and ran off. 190 00:06:58,520 --> 00:07:00,537 Let's not pretend this was some mistake 191 00:07:00,622 --> 00:07:02,639 or Dylan being oversensitive. 192 00:07:02,724 --> 00:07:04,085 We've all given him plenty of reasons 193 00:07:04,170 --> 00:07:05,756 to feel unwelcome in this family. 194 00:07:05,842 --> 00:07:07,795 And some of us do have a meanness. 195 00:07:07,881 --> 00:07:10,842 I'll leave it at that. A monstrous cruelty. 196 00:07:10,928 --> 00:07:12,241 Enough said. Sadistic. 197 00:07:12,327 --> 00:07:13,717 My family is really chill? 198 00:07:13,803 --> 00:07:15,248 Oh! You were a mistake. 199 00:07:15,334 --> 00:07:17,459 Okay, Haley's being occupied by Luke, 200 00:07:17,545 --> 00:07:18,608 so we have some time. 201 00:07:18,694 --> 00:07:19,877 We just have to find Dylan 202 00:07:19,936 --> 00:07:22,225 without letting Haley know he's run away. 203 00:07:22,311 --> 00:07:24,101 That kind of sounds like a shower problem, though. 204 00:07:24,186 --> 00:07:25,273 I don't know how fair it is to bring in 205 00:07:25,358 --> 00:07:26,781 - the Super Bowl folk into this. - Hey! 206 00:07:26,866 --> 00:07:30,827 My big sister gave me the honor of hosting her shower, 207 00:07:30,944 --> 00:07:32,913 and it's gonna be great. 208 00:07:32,999 --> 00:07:34,475 So, the one person 209 00:07:34,561 --> 00:07:36,123 who might know where Dylan went, Haley, 210 00:07:36,209 --> 00:07:38,426 is the one person who can't know he's missing. 211 00:07:38,506 --> 00:07:40,467 That's what I call a dramatic situation. 212 00:07:40,936 --> 00:07:43,016 Shouldn't you be directing the life out of it? 213 00:07:43,217 --> 00:07:45,522 Joe, where does Dylan like to go when he's depressed? 214 00:07:45,608 --> 00:07:47,819 Alex, he likes him, but it's not like... 215 00:07:47,905 --> 00:07:50,202 Park, pet store, guitar shop. 216 00:07:50,991 --> 00:07:52,889 What? I follow his Instagram. 217 00:07:52,975 --> 00:07:54,522 He finds beauty in the mundane. 218 00:07:54,608 --> 00:07:56,858 Okay. We'll search for Dylan in teams. 219 00:07:56,944 --> 00:07:58,795 - Mitch, Gloria... park. - Score. 220 00:07:58,881 --> 00:08:00,538 - Guitar store... Cam, Jay. - Um... 221 00:08:00,624 --> 00:08:02,998 And the pet store... Phil, Manny, go. 222 00:08:03,084 --> 00:08:04,873 - Actually, could I trade? - Your pretty face 223 00:08:04,959 --> 00:08:07,123 for one that's been freshly whooped? Try me! 224 00:08:07,209 --> 00:08:08,493 - Would it be possible if I could... - Move! 225 00:08:08,578 --> 00:08:10,647 Ah, they'll have a bathroom at the store. 226 00:08:13,852 --> 00:08:15,709 He's not stuck in the tube slide. 227 00:08:15,795 --> 00:08:17,194 Ah, it was too much to hope he'd be 228 00:08:17,280 --> 00:08:19,389 where we found him when Mister Rogers died. 229 00:08:19,701 --> 00:08:21,202 Oh. 230 00:08:21,897 --> 00:08:23,225 "You messed with the wrong girl. 231 00:08:23,311 --> 00:08:25,022 - "I'm coming for you." - Who is this? 232 00:08:25,115 --> 00:08:26,299 310. 233 00:08:26,385 --> 00:08:27,944 That's Bel Air. 234 00:08:28,192 --> 00:08:31,663 The Black Widow is out and already threatening you? 235 00:08:31,749 --> 00:08:32,920 This is good. 236 00:08:33,006 --> 00:08:35,491 You get to catch her and be a hero again. 237 00:08:35,577 --> 00:08:37,927 You know, maybe I should... I should send the Black Widow 238 00:08:38,013 --> 00:08:39,889 a... a "no hard feelings" text. 239 00:08:39,975 --> 00:08:40,990 - No. - No? 240 00:08:41,076 --> 00:08:42,492 What you said in court was right. 241 00:08:42,578 --> 00:08:44,764 That animal deserved no mercy. 242 00:08:44,858 --> 00:08:45,983 She deserves a cage. 243 00:08:46,084 --> 00:08:48,803 Well, you know, I said some things, she said some things. 244 00:08:48,889 --> 00:08:49,905 It's... Wait, um... 245 00:08:49,991 --> 00:08:51,710 "I am not afraid. 246 00:08:51,796 --> 00:08:53,834 - "Bring it on." - I... Oh, okay. 247 00:08:53,971 --> 00:08:55,913 All bullies are the same. 248 00:08:56,105 --> 00:08:57,422 They act like they're tough, 249 00:08:57,508 --> 00:08:59,458 but when you punch 'em in the nose, they back down. 250 00:08:59,543 --> 00:09:01,063 Yeah. 251 00:09:03,102 --> 00:09:04,519 "I know where you live. 252 00:09:04,605 --> 00:09:05,788 You're dead." 253 00:09:05,874 --> 00:09:07,731 That response is rare. 254 00:09:11,283 --> 00:09:12,366 There he is. 255 00:09:12,452 --> 00:09:13,770 Dylan. 256 00:09:14,056 --> 00:09:15,653 Hey, Dylan! 257 00:09:15,801 --> 00:09:17,150 Oh, sorry. 258 00:09:17,309 --> 00:09:20,262 That's the third time I've made that exact same mistake. 259 00:09:20,442 --> 00:09:22,879 Makes me wonder about some of my dates in 'Nam. 260 00:09:23,035 --> 00:09:24,910 Well, he ain't here. Let's go. 261 00:09:24,996 --> 00:09:28,261 My famous chili has been simmering since 5:00 a.m. 262 00:09:28,738 --> 00:09:29,831 Y-You know, it is funny 263 00:09:29,917 --> 00:09:31,629 that you keep calling your chili "famous" 264 00:09:31,715 --> 00:09:33,692 when I find it a little... 265 00:09:33,894 --> 00:09:35,582 forgettable. 266 00:09:35,668 --> 00:09:37,352 Cam, I'm a successful man. 267 00:09:37,438 --> 00:09:39,054 Captain of industry, 268 00:09:39,140 --> 00:09:40,832 made out with a Gabor sister, 269 00:09:41,026 --> 00:09:43,278 and if I can swing a few more board votes, 270 00:09:43,364 --> 00:09:44,629 we break ground on 271 00:09:44,715 --> 00:09:48,035 the Pritchett School of Closet Science at Ohio State. 272 00:09:48,121 --> 00:09:50,387 Not really sweating your take on my chili. 273 00:09:50,968 --> 00:09:52,715 He'd hurt me deeply. 274 00:09:53,003 --> 00:09:54,809 I kept mentioning chili 'cause, you know, 275 00:09:54,895 --> 00:09:56,277 I was trying to jog his memory, 276 00:09:56,363 --> 00:09:58,379 'cause we were supposed to make it together. 277 00:09:58,465 --> 00:10:01,778 I've waited my whole life for a special Super Bowl buddy, 278 00:10:01,832 --> 00:10:04,383 someone who understands it isn't just a game. 279 00:10:04,469 --> 00:10:08,403 It's a 15-hour, 4-meal, 2-shirt, 1-nap experience, 280 00:10:08,489 --> 00:10:10,840 and I thought Cam could be that buddy. 281 00:10:11,341 --> 00:10:12,606 Then I started worrying. 282 00:10:12,692 --> 00:10:15,442 Cam might forget a date we set a year ago. 283 00:10:17,219 --> 00:10:18,660 He remembered. 284 00:10:18,749 --> 00:10:20,934 He remembered, Stella! 285 00:10:21,659 --> 00:10:23,207 Be cool. 286 00:10:24,278 --> 00:10:25,840 Hey, what's up? 287 00:10:27,551 --> 00:10:28,700 Oh, butt-dial. 288 00:10:28,809 --> 00:10:30,160 No, I see. 289 00:10:30,444 --> 00:10:32,082 Yeah, take it easy. 290 00:10:42,184 --> 00:10:44,520 Nose print, man's... Face high, 291 00:10:44,606 --> 00:10:46,355 direct eye-line to baby bunnies. 292 00:10:46,441 --> 00:10:49,176 - Dylan was here. - This guy's about to have a kid. 293 00:10:49,262 --> 00:10:50,981 - What kind of adult male... - They're waking up. 294 00:10:51,066 --> 00:10:52,762 They're waking up. 295 00:10:53,098 --> 00:10:55,035 Hey, look, he's not here. 296 00:10:55,121 --> 00:10:56,481 Let's just get back to the parties. 297 00:10:56,567 --> 00:10:59,145 Ooh, I got to stop at that laundromat across the street. 298 00:10:59,360 --> 00:11:01,590 It'll take a second. I just need change for my squares. 299 00:11:01,676 --> 00:11:03,986 Funny. You're so focused when it's your passion project. 300 00:11:04,072 --> 00:11:05,840 Y-You know what, Manny? 301 00:11:05,933 --> 00:11:06,949 You're right. 302 00:11:07,035 --> 00:11:09,685 That whole thing was my bad. 303 00:11:09,935 --> 00:11:11,379 Thanks, Phil. 304 00:11:11,884 --> 00:11:15,809 Let me get both these doors so you and your ego can fit inside. 305 00:11:17,091 --> 00:11:18,668 I don't know how you can get mad at me 306 00:11:18,754 --> 00:11:20,613 after posting that humiliating video. 307 00:11:20,699 --> 00:11:23,153 - What video? - Don't play dumb. 308 00:11:24,350 --> 00:11:26,723 - Me cold. - Cut! 309 00:11:28,236 --> 00:11:29,585 "I'm so cold." 310 00:11:29,695 --> 00:11:32,699 Not "Me cold." Not "I'm not not cold." 311 00:11:32,785 --> 00:11:34,137 Not "Ice, ice baby." 312 00:11:34,223 --> 00:11:35,949 No humans say those things! 313 00:11:36,035 --> 00:11:38,606 It is so difficult to build a performance 314 00:11:38,692 --> 00:11:40,976 with a constant barrage of notes! 315 00:11:41,062 --> 00:11:43,020 Note! Say the line! 316 00:11:43,106 --> 00:11:44,692 Three words! 317 00:11:44,778 --> 00:11:46,036 You know what three words I'd like to hear? 318 00:11:46,121 --> 00:11:48,105 "Nice death, Phil!" 319 00:11:48,191 --> 00:11:50,426 I'm just trying to **** help you, 320 00:11:50,512 --> 00:11:52,348 you **** diva! **** 321 00:11:52,434 --> 00:11:55,020 And you keep **** yourself. 322 00:11:55,106 --> 00:11:58,371 Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid! 323 00:11:58,519 --> 00:11:59,987 Unbelievable! 324 00:12:03,629 --> 00:12:07,308 Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid! 325 00:12:07,434 --> 00:12:09,780 Fortunately, it cut off right before I really lost it. 326 00:12:09,866 --> 00:12:14,153 Manny, why would I post a video calling myself a "terrible actor"? 327 00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:15,840 Huh. 328 00:12:16,467 --> 00:12:17,984 Could've been my editor. 329 00:12:18,070 --> 00:12:20,184 During a particularly intense creative discussion, 330 00:12:20,270 --> 00:12:22,723 I may have slapped him in front of his girlfriend. 331 00:12:22,809 --> 00:12:24,125 Phil, I'm sorry. 332 00:12:24,212 --> 00:12:26,457 I think the reason I got frustrated 333 00:12:26,543 --> 00:12:28,746 is only partly due to your infuriating incompetence. 334 00:12:28,832 --> 00:12:30,332 Was that so hard? 335 00:12:30,418 --> 00:12:32,645 Between us, I've applied to transfer 336 00:12:32,731 --> 00:12:35,035 to somewhere I can major in accounting or law. 337 00:12:35,121 --> 00:12:36,371 Something safe. 338 00:12:36,457 --> 00:12:37,465 I've started to question 339 00:12:37,551 --> 00:12:39,965 if I have any talent as a filmmaker. 340 00:12:40,707 --> 00:12:42,145 Let's find out. 341 00:12:42,231 --> 00:12:44,168 - You got your film with you? - On my phone. 342 00:12:44,254 --> 00:12:46,168 We have a perfect test audience. 343 00:12:46,254 --> 00:12:47,837 Take a chance. Let's, uh... 344 00:12:47,923 --> 00:12:49,406 Let's see what you got. 345 00:12:49,492 --> 00:12:51,285 Okay. I mean, I got my projector. 346 00:12:51,371 --> 00:12:52,871 And a screen. 347 00:12:52,957 --> 00:12:54,855 - All right. I'll set it up. - Great. 348 00:12:54,941 --> 00:12:57,126 Meanwhile, I'll warm up the crowd with a magic trick. 349 00:12:57,360 --> 00:12:58,762 Excuse me. 350 00:12:58,848 --> 00:13:01,426 I need everyone to put their wallets in this pillow case 351 00:13:01,512 --> 00:13:03,559 and turn and face the wall. 352 00:13:05,241 --> 00:13:07,379 Well, that's it. No one knows where Dylan is. 353 00:13:07,465 --> 00:13:08,535 They better. 354 00:13:08,628 --> 00:13:10,403 Her friends are gonna be here in 20 minutes... 355 00:13:10,488 --> 00:13:12,309 The same ones who at a graduation party 356 00:13:12,395 --> 00:13:14,768 voted her most likely to be pregnant and alone. 357 00:13:14,854 --> 00:13:16,159 - Hmm. - Like I always say... 358 00:13:16,245 --> 00:13:18,596 It's better to have no friends than mean friends. 359 00:13:18,682 --> 00:13:20,081 Well... 360 00:13:20,175 --> 00:13:21,987 Dylan's always been a runner. 361 00:13:22,485 --> 00:13:25,049 God, you remember when he was a blond? 362 00:13:25,135 --> 00:13:27,174 Ugh, I called him "Lady Dye-Job" 363 00:13:27,260 --> 00:13:29,978 and he ran off, and I had to track him down... 364 00:13:30,064 --> 00:13:32,698 I know where Dylan is. I know where he is! 365 00:13:35,128 --> 00:13:36,177 Dylan. 366 00:13:36,263 --> 00:13:38,047 Hey, Dylan, open up. It's Claire. 367 00:13:38,133 --> 00:13:40,081 I... I don't want to talk, Mrs. D. 368 00:13:40,167 --> 00:13:41,604 Look, I realize you're upset. 369 00:13:41,690 --> 00:13:43,588 But those things that Cam and Mitch 370 00:13:43,674 --> 00:13:45,268 and Luke and Phil and Gloria said, 371 00:13:45,354 --> 00:13:48,073 they're... they were just, uh, silly misunderstandings. 372 00:13:48,159 --> 00:13:49,502 Okay. 373 00:13:49,588 --> 00:13:51,299 But what about what you said? 374 00:13:52,039 --> 00:13:53,682 You realize we're gonna have to baby-proof 375 00:13:53,768 --> 00:13:55,041 all the cabinets at home, right? 376 00:13:55,142 --> 00:13:56,331 Think of how cute it'll be 377 00:13:56,417 --> 00:13:57,987 watching Dylan try to get into them. 378 00:14:01,675 --> 00:14:03,276 I... shouldn't have said that, 379 00:14:03,362 --> 00:14:05,182 and I obviously didn't realize... 380 00:14:05,268 --> 00:14:07,088 What? That I would get that joke? 381 00:14:07,198 --> 00:14:08,659 The insult set it up, Mrs. D. 382 00:14:08,745 --> 00:14:11,752 - "Lady Dye-Job" has feelings. - Oh, Dylan. 383 00:14:12,120 --> 00:14:14,469 Dylan, come on. Honey, the party is starting... 384 00:14:14,620 --> 00:14:17,534 Please. I... I'm sorry. 385 00:14:17,908 --> 00:14:19,377 I'm leaving. 386 00:14:23,808 --> 00:14:25,379 Open up. It's Mr. Gonzales, 387 00:14:25,465 --> 00:14:26,776 the parking attendant. 388 00:14:26,862 --> 00:14:28,291 I'm not an idiot, Mrs. D. 389 00:14:28,377 --> 00:14:30,684 I know you just went to get Mr. Gonzales 390 00:14:30,770 --> 00:14:33,690 so you could run in here when I open the door for him. 391 00:14:46,125 --> 00:14:47,925 Hey. 392 00:14:48,252 --> 00:14:49,917 Hey. Hey, Dylan? 393 00:14:50,003 --> 00:14:51,119 Dylan? Dyl... 394 00:14:51,295 --> 00:14:52,849 Ohh, damn it! 395 00:14:53,869 --> 00:14:57,036 Can we hurry? I want to get back so I can apologize to Christina. 396 00:14:57,122 --> 00:14:59,026 Oh, no. Lily, why risk your heart? 397 00:14:59,112 --> 00:15:00,414 Christina will just hurt you. 398 00:15:00,500 --> 00:15:01,761 I couldn't agree more, Lily. 399 00:15:01,847 --> 00:15:04,364 If Christina doesn't appreciate your warmth, your humor, 400 00:15:04,450 --> 00:15:05,656 your great stories, 401 00:15:05,750 --> 00:15:06,883 she's just not worth it. 402 00:15:06,976 --> 00:15:08,827 Oh, maybe she'll regret taking you for granted 403 00:15:08,913 --> 00:15:11,156 when she's old and alone in that big house 404 00:15:11,242 --> 00:15:14,250 and realizes all that money can't keep her warm. 405 00:15:14,607 --> 00:15:16,289 What is happening? 406 00:15:16,556 --> 00:15:18,422 Movies in a laundromat now? 407 00:15:18,508 --> 00:15:21,438 Can't hipsters just let a thing be a thing? 408 00:15:21,540 --> 00:15:24,906 There is much I wish to say to you, Alexei, 409 00:15:25,181 --> 00:15:27,469 not just now, but for long time. 410 00:15:27,555 --> 00:15:31,211 How could one slight cost 20 years friendship? 411 00:15:31,425 --> 00:15:35,094 Silly 19th century Russian pride? 412 00:15:35,379 --> 00:15:38,531 Why we not have courage to take chance on love? 413 00:15:38,617 --> 00:15:40,008 Fools, us humans. 414 00:15:40,094 --> 00:15:41,149 It's not too late. 415 00:15:41,235 --> 00:15:42,351 It is for me, 416 00:15:42,407 --> 00:15:43,969 my great, great friend. 417 00:15:44,055 --> 00:15:47,164 I go now to grand Kremlin in the sky. 418 00:15:48,902 --> 00:15:50,461 It's chilly. 419 00:15:51,859 --> 00:15:53,094 Chili. 420 00:15:53,184 --> 00:15:54,781 Why did he have to mention that? 421 00:15:54,867 --> 00:15:57,422 We were supposed to cook together this morning, Cam. 422 00:15:57,508 --> 00:15:58,547 I waited for you. 423 00:15:58,633 --> 00:16:00,516 But I was there on your front porch with flours. 424 00:16:00,602 --> 00:16:01,805 You remembered the thickeners? 425 00:16:01,891 --> 00:16:03,930 Of course I did. I thought you forgot. 426 00:16:04,905 --> 00:16:06,610 I have an identical one for you! 427 00:16:06,703 --> 00:16:08,688 Oh, Jay, you don't know how much this means to me! 428 00:16:08,774 --> 00:16:10,875 Lily, you... you have to apologize to Christina. 429 00:16:10,961 --> 00:16:11,977 That's right. 430 00:16:12,063 --> 00:16:14,180 Don't be like me and Cam and Sergei and Alexei. 431 00:16:14,266 --> 00:16:16,031 Pride is poison! Yes, open your heart! 432 00:16:16,117 --> 00:16:17,688 Let yourself love! 433 00:16:17,774 --> 00:16:19,357 Jay... 434 00:16:19,443 --> 00:16:21,352 So, nobody's wondering why Uncle Phil 435 00:16:21,445 --> 00:16:23,359 is starring in a laundromat movie? 436 00:16:25,929 --> 00:16:28,055 N-No-o-o-o! 437 00:16:43,946 --> 00:16:45,195 So? 438 00:16:45,280 --> 00:16:46,430 It's... 439 00:16:46,515 --> 00:16:47,865 not very good. 440 00:16:47,950 --> 00:16:49,860 I knew it. I wasted my time. 441 00:16:49,946 --> 00:16:51,963 But it's much better than the last one, 442 00:16:52,049 --> 00:16:53,833 and there was one moment when Count Ivanovich was... 443 00:16:53,918 --> 00:16:55,931 Was playing chess with the bear that really moved me. 444 00:16:56,016 --> 00:16:56,841 Well, that was supposed to be 445 00:16:56,926 --> 00:16:58,220 the emotional gestalt of the piece. 446 00:16:58,305 --> 00:16:59,823 You can hear me stifle a sob in the cut 447 00:16:59,908 --> 00:17:01,759 because my boom operator was undermining me. 448 00:17:01,845 --> 00:17:04,094 You had an astonishingly toxic set. 449 00:17:04,569 --> 00:17:06,156 Listen, Manny, if I was your dad, 450 00:17:06,242 --> 00:17:07,848 I might tell you to play it safe with your career. 451 00:17:07,933 --> 00:17:09,141 But as a fan, 452 00:17:09,227 --> 00:17:11,044 I'm dying to see what you come up with next. 453 00:17:11,134 --> 00:17:12,438 - Really? - Yeah. 454 00:17:12,524 --> 00:17:14,814 I've been watching you make up stories since you were this big. 455 00:17:14,899 --> 00:17:15,923 I want to see how it ends. 456 00:17:16,008 --> 00:17:17,025 Not that. 457 00:17:17,111 --> 00:17:19,571 I-I want to see how this ends. 458 00:17:20,209 --> 00:17:21,625 Thanks, Phil. 459 00:17:21,711 --> 00:17:23,227 I would like to keep trying, 460 00:17:23,313 --> 00:17:24,729 maybe something not so commercial. 461 00:17:24,815 --> 00:17:26,196 That's great. 462 00:17:26,501 --> 00:17:29,186 I do think it's the end of the road for me as a thespian, though. 463 00:17:29,272 --> 00:17:30,680 Probably best. 464 00:17:30,766 --> 00:17:33,406 Well, I did have a part in my next film for a guy your age, 465 00:17:33,492 --> 00:17:35,977 but you'd have to grow a Fu Manchu moustache 466 00:17:36,063 --> 00:17:37,580 and gain 40 pounds in two weeks. 467 00:17:37,666 --> 00:17:39,078 I'll be ready Tuesday. 468 00:17:39,778 --> 00:17:41,297 - Cilantro. - Yes. 469 00:17:41,383 --> 00:17:43,571 - Diced red onion? - You are good. 470 00:17:43,657 --> 00:17:45,367 Hey, don't run away with the rest of that. 471 00:17:45,481 --> 00:17:47,359 - Ugh, what am I looking at? - Mmm. 472 00:17:47,445 --> 00:17:50,527 Mitch, come here. Show them how to be a real man. 473 00:17:50,620 --> 00:17:54,332 He has been getting threatening texts all day 474 00:17:54,418 --> 00:17:57,856 from a fugitive, and he hasn't even flinched. 475 00:17:57,942 --> 00:18:00,363 Well, they're lucky they're pretty, right? 476 00:18:01,107 --> 00:18:03,496 Daddy, can I borrow your phone? 477 00:18:03,582 --> 00:18:05,668 I want to apologize to Christina. 478 00:18:05,769 --> 00:18:08,185 Lily, no. His phone might be evidence 479 00:18:08,271 --> 00:18:10,762 - in a murder trial. - Whose? 480 00:18:10,972 --> 00:18:13,770 Sweetie, have you been using Daddy's phone to text your friend? 481 00:18:13,856 --> 00:18:15,272 Yeah, and I said some mean stuff. 482 00:18:15,358 --> 00:18:17,535 She's probably been texting me back. 483 00:18:18,599 --> 00:18:21,020 My God. Okay, okay. 484 00:18:21,106 --> 00:18:22,466 "I'm... I'm right outside your house. 485 00:18:22,551 --> 00:18:23,949 This ends now." 486 00:18:24,035 --> 00:18:25,129 Oh! 487 00:18:25,215 --> 00:18:26,521 "P.S., your hair's ugly." 488 00:18:26,607 --> 00:18:28,891 It's a bluff. She's not out there. 489 00:18:28,977 --> 00:18:30,645 I mean, if you want to go check, check. 490 00:18:30,731 --> 00:18:33,426 You know, us weaklings would feel so much better 491 00:18:33,512 --> 00:18:35,801 if you would just take a quick look. Please. 492 00:18:35,887 --> 00:18:37,895 Well, as... as lawman and protector, 493 00:18:37,981 --> 00:18:40,973 that is something that I... I can do. 494 00:18:46,419 --> 00:18:48,035 - Hey. - Ohh! 495 00:18:52,207 --> 00:18:53,738 Thank you for this, Dylan, 496 00:18:53,824 --> 00:18:55,996 and I appreciate you forgiving me 497 00:18:56,082 --> 00:18:57,785 for the dumb thing I said earlier. 498 00:18:57,871 --> 00:18:59,082 Who said I forgave you? 499 00:18:59,168 --> 00:19:00,340 I'm only treating your injury 500 00:19:00,426 --> 00:19:02,262 because you're a guest in my home. 501 00:19:03,307 --> 00:19:04,895 I know it may seem 502 00:19:04,981 --> 00:19:06,732 that I haven't always accepted you, 503 00:19:06,818 --> 00:19:08,121 but when I met you, 504 00:19:08,207 --> 00:19:10,307 you were an 18-year-old in a leather jacket 505 00:19:10,393 --> 00:19:12,417 dating my 15-year-old daughter. 506 00:19:12,503 --> 00:19:13,503 I get it. 507 00:19:13,589 --> 00:19:15,043 You were trying to protect your daughter 508 00:19:15,128 --> 00:19:16,044 from a guy like me, 509 00:19:16,130 --> 00:19:17,340 but I haven't been a guy like me 510 00:19:17,425 --> 00:19:18,425 for a long time. 511 00:19:18,541 --> 00:19:19,603 Bend for me. 512 00:19:19,689 --> 00:19:20,736 It's hard, Dylan. 513 00:19:20,822 --> 00:19:22,542 I have been a mama bear for so long... 514 00:19:22,628 --> 00:19:24,946 - No, your elbow. - Oh. 515 00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:26,353 Okay. 516 00:19:26,728 --> 00:19:29,393 It's j... It's all happening so fast. 517 00:19:29,479 --> 00:19:31,081 But it is happening. 518 00:19:31,167 --> 00:19:34,104 I'm about to be the father to your grandbabies. 519 00:19:34,529 --> 00:19:36,089 Reach out a little. 520 00:19:36,243 --> 00:19:37,706 I meant emotionally. 521 00:19:37,792 --> 00:19:38,807 Oh. 522 00:19:38,893 --> 00:19:40,210 I can look myself in the mirror 523 00:19:40,296 --> 00:19:41,679 and know that I've tried my hardest 524 00:19:41,765 --> 00:19:43,745 to make our relationship work. 525 00:19:44,009 --> 00:19:45,643 Can you do the same? 526 00:19:46,629 --> 00:19:48,120 Go ahead. 527 00:19:49,159 --> 00:19:50,994 Here, let me give you some light. 528 00:19:51,844 --> 00:19:53,403 Oops, uh, not that one. 529 00:19:53,489 --> 00:19:54,565 No. 530 00:19:55,819 --> 00:19:57,917 There are a lot of ways for a family to grow... 531 00:19:58,003 --> 00:20:01,042 - Touchdown! - Touchdown! 532 00:20:01,660 --> 00:20:04,412 Finding interests you didn't know you shared... 533 00:20:04,498 --> 00:20:06,425 - Eh... - Come on, I've got two weeks! 534 00:20:06,511 --> 00:20:07,901 Blur your eyes. Look at this. 535 00:20:07,987 --> 00:20:11,667 Finding new challenges to embark on together... 536 00:20:12,304 --> 00:20:14,112 But it takes a lot of work. 537 00:20:14,885 --> 00:20:19,721 The best way for families to grow is by adding to them. 538 00:20:19,807 --> 00:20:24,792 So this is to the newest members of our family. 539 00:20:24,917 --> 00:20:28,612 I look forward to getting to know all of you. 540 00:20:28,843 --> 00:20:30,964 - Love you. - Cheers. 541 00:20:33,354 --> 00:20:36,870 I'm... f-f... f-freezing. 542 00:20:36,988 --> 00:20:38,487 Cut! 543 00:20:39,066 --> 00:20:40,800 Could it be any colder? 544 00:20:40,886 --> 00:20:42,198 No! 545 00:20:43,684 --> 00:20:45,721 Fur hat weather, no? 546 00:20:45,807 --> 00:20:46,807 No! 547 00:20:47,098 --> 00:20:48,448 "I'm so cold." 548 00:20:48,534 --> 00:20:49,737 "I'm so cold." 549 00:20:49,823 --> 00:20:52,675 "I'm so cold!" And action. 550 00:20:54,526 --> 00:20:56,901 Um... brr, am I right? 551 00:20:56,987 --> 00:20:58,854 You've got to be kidding me.