1 00:00:01,463 --> 00:00:02,466 It's settled. 2 00:00:02,506 --> 00:00:05,547 The urinals in the women's restroom will be turned into planters. 3 00:00:05,587 --> 00:00:07,506 Onto chores. 4 00:00:07,541 --> 00:00:09,290 We need some able bodies to clear out a space 5 00:00:09,364 --> 00:00:10,897 in the east hall's storage room. 6 00:00:10,932 --> 00:00:12,098 - I'll do it. - Really? 7 00:00:12,133 --> 00:00:14,067 Yeah, Annie always goes from the easy chores to the hardest. 8 00:00:14,101 --> 00:00:15,102 That's true, isn't it? 9 00:00:15,136 --> 00:00:16,770 - I'll do it too. - Yeah, me too. 10 00:00:16,804 --> 00:00:18,405 Okay, that concludes this meeting. 11 00:00:18,439 --> 00:00:19,539 - Oh! - Aw, man! 12 00:00:19,574 --> 00:00:21,775 Nobody picks up on my patterns! What am I gonna say next? 13 00:00:21,809 --> 00:00:23,710 Graham cracker! You didn't know. 14 00:00:23,744 --> 00:00:25,912 Hey, it's the "aww couple." 15 00:00:25,947 --> 00:00:27,380 Aww. 16 00:00:27,415 --> 00:00:29,095 Look what Rachel got me: Pile of Bullets. 17 00:00:29,117 --> 00:00:31,485 An interactive Old West-themed VCR game from the '90s. 18 00:00:31,519 --> 00:00:32,819 I found it at goodwill. 19 00:00:32,854 --> 00:00:35,555 It was between a Thighmaster and a Dick Tracy Burger King glass. 20 00:00:35,590 --> 00:00:37,457 - Happy anniversary. - Anniversary? 21 00:00:37,492 --> 00:00:39,493 I guess I should learn your name, young lady. 22 00:00:39,527 --> 00:00:40,527 Oh, Rachel. 23 00:00:40,561 --> 00:00:42,262 Rachel. Nice to meet you, Rachel. 24 00:00:42,296 --> 00:00:44,672 - You can go. - Okay. 25 00:00:45,278 --> 00:00:47,701 - Aww! - Anniversary? 26 00:00:47,735 --> 00:00:49,133 Yeah, Rachel and I have been dating for one of your months, 27 00:00:49,168 --> 00:00:50,891 but our relationship is 12 times more efficient, 28 00:00:50,926 --> 00:00:53,173 so it's really been a year. Our sleep cycles are in synch, 29 00:00:53,207 --> 00:00:54,274 we can communicate with our eyebrows, 30 00:00:54,308 --> 00:00:56,443 and she knows my Netflix password... Jeff's Netflix password. 31 00:00:56,477 --> 00:00:57,844 Damn it. I'm changing that. 32 00:00:57,879 --> 00:00:58,879 - I changed it. - To what? 33 00:00:58,880 --> 00:00:59,880 Nice try. 34 00:00:59,914 --> 00:01:01,948 Annie, can Rachel come to our place to play this tonight? 35 00:01:01,983 --> 00:01:03,216 I can't afford to take her anywhere. 36 00:01:03,251 --> 00:01:04,317 Well, my brother's in town for the week, 37 00:01:04,352 --> 00:01:05,952 and I'm broke too, 38 00:01:05,987 --> 00:01:07,787 so I was gonna make him dinner tonight. 39 00:01:07,822 --> 00:01:08,822 Cool. Double date? 40 00:01:08,856 --> 00:01:10,490 Dinner and 1993 interactive VCR game? 41 00:01:10,525 --> 00:01:11,758 - What are you making? - Salmon. 42 00:01:11,793 --> 00:01:13,660 Buttered noodles. 43 00:01:13,694 --> 00:01:14,728 Buttered noodles are my favorite. 44 00:01:14,762 --> 00:01:16,063 - Hmm. - Ah! 45 00:01:16,097 --> 00:01:19,966 Quick announcement for two of Greendale's finest. 46 00:01:20,001 --> 00:01:23,570 Payday is postponed until next week. So this... 47 00:01:24,872 --> 00:01:27,407 ...is my freestyle rap apology. 48 00:01:27,442 --> 00:01:28,842 ♪ Well, I'm a peanut bar ♪ 49 00:01:28,876 --> 00:01:30,043 ♪ And I'm here to say ♪ 50 00:01:30,077 --> 00:01:32,312 ♪ Your checks will arrive on another day ♪ 51 00:01:32,346 --> 00:01:34,706 ♪ Another day, another dime, another rhyme, another dollar ♪ 52 00:01:34,716 --> 00:01:36,716 ♪ Another stuffed shirt with another white collar ♪ 53 00:01:36,751 --> 00:01:38,552 ♪ Criminals, Wall Street, taking the pie ♪ 54 00:01:38,586 --> 00:01:41,154 ♪ And all the black man gets is a plate of white lies ♪ 55 00:01:41,189 --> 00:01:43,023 ♪ Prisons! Recruitin' 'em! Police be shootin' them ♪ 56 00:01:43,057 --> 00:01:45,492 ♪ Rap artists lootin' them, labels all dilutin' them ♪ 57 00:01:45,526 --> 00:01:47,727 ♪ Barack Obama is scared of me ♪ 58 00:01:47,762 --> 00:01:49,262 ♪ 'Cause I don't swallow knowledge ♪ 59 00:01:49,297 --> 00:01:50,897 ♪ And I spit it for free ♪ 60 00:01:50,932 --> 00:01:52,799 ♪ Let me clear my throat, ah-ha, ah-ha... ♪ 61 00:01:54,101 --> 00:01:56,736 I don't know what that was, I don't. 62 00:01:56,771 --> 00:02:00,173 I don't know what that was. 63 00:02:09,016 --> 00:02:11,084 ♪ Give me some rope ♪ 64 00:02:11,119 --> 00:02:12,786 ♪ Tie me to dream ♪ 65 00:02:12,820 --> 00:02:14,121 ♪ Give me the hope ♪ 66 00:02:14,155 --> 00:02:15,655 ♪ To run out of steam ♪ 67 00:02:15,690 --> 00:02:19,126 ♪ Somebody said it can be here ♪ 68 00:02:19,160 --> 00:02:23,030 ♪ We could be roped up, tied up, dead in a year ♪ 69 00:02:23,064 --> 00:02:28,135 ♪ I can't count the reasons I should stay ♪ 70 00:02:28,169 --> 00:02:32,313 ♪ One by one, they all just fade away ♪ 71 00:02:32,340 --> 00:02:35,208 Sync and corrected by Elderfel www.addic7ed.com 72 00:02:37,876 --> 00:02:40,714 So nice to have the Edison kids under one roof again. 73 00:02:40,748 --> 00:02:42,816 Remember when we used to cut carrots for mom? 74 00:02:42,850 --> 00:02:43,984 Yes. 75 00:02:44,018 --> 00:02:46,987 - I need a soda. - Oh, okay. 76 00:02:47,021 --> 00:02:50,657 One, two, three. 77 00:02:50,691 --> 00:02:51,892 Door's busted. 78 00:02:51,926 --> 00:02:53,960 Landlord's in jail and money's tight. 79 00:02:53,995 --> 00:02:56,263 Yeah. 80 00:03:04,439 --> 00:03:05,472 Oh, my God! 81 00:03:05,506 --> 00:03:07,541 Anthony! Thank you! 82 00:03:07,575 --> 00:03:08,708 Yeah. 83 00:03:08,743 --> 00:03:11,678 - Hey, Abed, a quick word. - Hmm. 84 00:03:13,548 --> 00:03:15,582 What would you think about my brother moving in with us? 85 00:03:15,616 --> 00:03:17,584 Do I just keep cutting carrots? 86 00:03:17,618 --> 00:03:18,618 Yes, Anthony! 87 00:03:18,619 --> 00:03:22,055 - He has money. He's handy. - You're putting me on the spot. 88 00:03:22,090 --> 00:03:23,323 I guess my knee-jerk concern would be 89 00:03:23,357 --> 00:03:24,758 that he's a Viking and might only use our home 90 00:03:24,792 --> 00:03:27,194 as a temporary base before moving inland where lumber is more plentiful. 91 00:03:27,228 --> 00:03:29,663 He's a good guy. We can't afford to keep splitting the rent two ways. 92 00:03:29,697 --> 00:03:30,797 You have a better idea? 93 00:03:30,832 --> 00:03:32,499 - How about Rachel? - Is that a joke? 94 00:03:32,533 --> 00:03:33,834 Is it cool if I poop? 95 00:03:33,868 --> 00:03:36,069 No, Anthony! Just cut the carrots! 96 00:03:36,104 --> 00:03:37,637 You've been dating Rachel for a month. 97 00:03:37,672 --> 00:03:40,127 I don't think you heard his question. The answer is yes! 98 00:03:41,642 --> 00:03:43,410 Rachel and I have been dating for the equivalent of a year. 99 00:03:43,444 --> 00:03:44,778 Oh, really? 100 00:03:44,812 --> 00:03:46,880 'Cause I feel like I've been hearing about that for two years. 101 00:03:46,914 --> 00:03:48,655 You can't just microwave a relationship like it's a bean burrito. 102 00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:50,494 I ain't living with your month-long girlfriend, brah. 103 00:03:50,531 --> 00:03:51,685 Well, I ain't living with your wack-ass, 104 00:03:51,719 --> 00:03:53,787 don't-know-whether-to-keep-cutting-carrots- or-ask-if-he-can-take-a-poop-brother. 105 00:03:53,821 --> 00:03:55,288 Can we discuss this later? 106 00:03:55,323 --> 00:03:58,525 Rachel's on her way, and I'd like to practice my smile. 107 00:03:58,559 --> 00:04:02,129 I guess it was just air. 108 00:04:07,535 --> 00:04:09,803 Why are we organizing a storage room? 109 00:04:09,837 --> 00:04:12,672 - How is this not a janitor's job? - Can I ask you something? 110 00:04:12,707 --> 00:04:15,008 Why the hell do you have all those muscles 111 00:04:15,042 --> 00:04:17,511 if you're gonna bitch about moving boxes? 112 00:04:17,545 --> 00:04:18,712 Is the air working in here? 113 00:04:18,746 --> 00:04:20,514 I'm sweating like a Catholic on Judgment Day. 114 00:04:20,548 --> 00:04:22,683 Just a little protestant humor. 115 00:04:22,717 --> 00:04:26,553 - I've got more. - Oh, can't wait. 116 00:04:26,587 --> 00:04:27,921 Nothin'. 117 00:04:27,955 --> 00:04:31,058 Wait, there's something in there blocking the vent. 118 00:04:31,092 --> 00:04:32,592 You gonna open it? 119 00:04:32,627 --> 00:04:34,161 You do realize nothing good has ever been found 120 00:04:34,195 --> 00:04:35,262 in a vent, right? 121 00:04:35,296 --> 00:04:37,531 It's a vent. 122 00:04:37,565 --> 00:04:40,634 Whoa. 123 00:04:40,668 --> 00:04:41,835 Huh. 124 00:04:48,376 --> 00:04:50,243 Oh! 125 00:04:50,278 --> 00:04:54,581 Intro to Chemistry. Third edition. 126 00:04:56,651 --> 00:04:57,918 Mint. 127 00:04:57,952 --> 00:04:59,386 $200 retail. 128 00:04:59,420 --> 00:05:01,555 160 on the street. 129 00:05:01,589 --> 00:05:03,323 Why are there books in an air duct? 130 00:05:03,357 --> 00:05:04,791 Why is there hot sauce in the bathroom? 131 00:05:04,826 --> 00:05:06,760 - It's Greendale. - They must be stolen. 132 00:05:06,794 --> 00:05:09,196 - We have to tell the Dean. - Hold on. 133 00:05:09,230 --> 00:05:13,100 Let's just calm down and have a slow, pleasant chat 134 00:05:13,134 --> 00:05:15,435 - about possibilities. - What kind? 135 00:05:15,470 --> 00:05:17,971 All kinds. Anything is possible. 136 00:05:18,005 --> 00:05:21,308 We might one day have hover cars. Kale might be poisonous. 137 00:05:21,342 --> 00:05:23,944 And we might not have to get the Dean involved here. 138 00:05:23,978 --> 00:05:26,179 - Jeffrey, these are stolen! - From who? 139 00:05:26,214 --> 00:05:28,048 By who? How long ago? 140 00:05:28,082 --> 00:05:31,151 It's "from whom," "by whom." But he nailed the third question. 141 00:05:31,185 --> 00:05:34,788 Look, we are the committee that deals with Greendale's problems. 142 00:05:34,822 --> 00:05:36,423 Now did you see anything on our list 143 00:05:36,457 --> 00:05:37,791 about a pile of missing books 144 00:05:37,825 --> 00:05:39,693 that are worth more than the school they're hidden in? 145 00:05:39,727 --> 00:05:41,061 One thing's for sure. 146 00:05:41,095 --> 00:05:43,163 If we hand these over, they'll really go missing. 147 00:05:43,197 --> 00:05:45,632 And you think that money's gonna be used to cut our paychecks 148 00:05:45,666 --> 00:05:48,602 or to make another rapping peanut costume? 149 00:05:48,636 --> 00:05:50,971 - I can't believe what I'm hearing. - Fine. You wanna go to heaven? 150 00:05:51,005 --> 00:05:53,507 - Walk away, more for us. - I'm an accomplice now! 151 00:05:53,541 --> 00:05:55,842 If I walk away, I'll only get into heaven by turning you in. 152 00:05:55,877 --> 00:05:59,646 But what about your restaurant? What about your kids? 153 00:05:59,680 --> 00:06:02,916 Ms. Bennett, when God talks to you, what language does he use? 154 00:06:02,950 --> 00:06:06,486 Because in my experience, when he thinks you deserve something, 155 00:06:06,521 --> 00:06:09,689 he drops it on you like a ton of bricks. 156 00:06:13,761 --> 00:06:16,596 Okay. All right. 157 00:06:16,597 --> 00:06:19,866 But if we're gonna do this, we're gonna do this clean and safe. 158 00:06:19,901 --> 00:06:21,968 We're gonna move these to my restaurant in bread carts, 159 00:06:22,003 --> 00:06:23,804 and we're gonna sit on 'em until we know they're cold. 160 00:06:23,838 --> 00:06:25,105 Then we're gonna price them through a third party, 161 00:06:25,139 --> 00:06:27,240 and we're gonna unload them in a single score. 162 00:06:27,275 --> 00:06:29,810 None of that nickel-and-dime crap. I don't wanna leave a trail. 163 00:06:29,844 --> 00:06:32,579 - Yeah, great. - Wonderful. 164 00:06:32,613 --> 00:06:34,848 Okay, let's count these babies up. 165 00:06:34,882 --> 00:06:36,116 Yeah, great. 166 00:06:36,150 --> 00:06:38,985 When we were kids, 167 00:06:39,020 --> 00:06:40,354 Anthony and I would play Time Machine. 168 00:06:40,388 --> 00:06:44,124 We would go, "Oh, no! We're in Barbarian times! 169 00:06:44,158 --> 00:06:46,193 Quick! Back to the Time Machine!" 170 00:06:46,227 --> 00:06:52,065 And then we would run back to the Time Machine. 171 00:06:52,100 --> 00:06:53,700 It's true. 172 00:06:53,735 --> 00:06:55,102 I bet that's why Abed is like a brother to me. 173 00:06:55,136 --> 00:06:56,603 You guys are so alike. 174 00:06:56,637 --> 00:06:58,677 I can't accept that based on one time-machine story. 175 00:06:58,706 --> 00:07:02,075 Rachel, did you tell Annie about your Waterpik? 176 00:07:02,110 --> 00:07:05,345 I suppose now is as good a time as any. 177 00:07:05,380 --> 00:07:08,382 - I own a Waterpik. - Annie has one too. 178 00:07:08,416 --> 00:07:09,816 You guys both care for your teeth the same amount. 179 00:07:09,851 --> 00:07:11,652 If you shared a bathroom, it'd go pretty smoothly. 180 00:07:11,686 --> 00:07:13,020 Anthony said he could fix our cabinets. 181 00:07:13,054 --> 00:07:15,389 Rachel used to mop floors when she worked at Kmart. 182 00:07:15,423 --> 00:07:17,824 Is this a real conversation or are we being bugged by the feds? 183 00:07:17,859 --> 00:07:22,254 Abed. Sidebar. 184 00:07:24,499 --> 00:07:28,435 What do you think happens after you die? 185 00:07:28,469 --> 00:07:29,636 I don't know. 186 00:07:29,671 --> 00:07:32,205 You're lucky. 187 00:07:32,240 --> 00:07:35,942 - Stop trying to sell me on Rachel. - Stop pitching Anthony so hard. 188 00:07:35,977 --> 00:07:37,544 You're like ice cream cake out there... overkill. 189 00:07:37,578 --> 00:07:38,945 We need a roommate. We're broke. 190 00:07:38,980 --> 00:07:40,213 - I vote for Rachel. - I vote for Anthony. 191 00:07:40,248 --> 00:07:42,416 - Flip a coin? - No. Coins create parallel timelines. 192 00:07:42,450 --> 00:07:45,686 - Rock, paper, scissors? - That's a nine-sided coin. 193 00:07:45,720 --> 00:07:47,354 What about Pile of Bullets? 194 00:07:47,388 --> 00:07:53,427 You wanna decide on a roommate with a 1993 Old West-themed VCR game? 195 00:07:53,461 --> 00:07:55,862 If Rachel or I win, Rachel moves in. 196 00:07:55,897 --> 00:07:57,464 If you or Anthony win, I'll politely surrender 197 00:07:57,498 --> 00:07:58,999 and count down the days until he eats me. 198 00:07:59,033 --> 00:08:02,869 All right, it's settled. 199 00:08:02,904 --> 00:08:06,073 - Is this working? - It's a handshake in progress. 200 00:08:06,107 --> 00:08:08,208 Who wants to play Pile of Bullets? 201 00:08:08,242 --> 00:08:09,443 - Not me. - You have to. 202 00:08:09,477 --> 00:08:11,978 - Oh, it's okay, we don't have to. - It's not okay. We do have to. 203 00:08:11,979 --> 00:08:13,380 We all have to, and one day we'll tell you why. 204 00:08:13,414 --> 00:08:15,382 But for now, let's simply retire to the TV area. 205 00:08:15,416 --> 00:08:17,951 For the highest stakes 1993 interactive VCR game 206 00:08:17,986 --> 00:08:20,220 of your entire young adult lives. 207 00:08:22,409 --> 00:08:24,495 Okay, let's see what you got. 208 00:08:32,251 --> 00:08:34,252 Yeah. Okay. 209 00:08:34,287 --> 00:08:36,321 I know somebody that knows people. 210 00:08:36,355 --> 00:08:39,089 I can get you a price per book, find a buyer, and make a deal. 211 00:08:39,124 --> 00:08:41,159 - For half. - That's ridiculous. 212 00:08:41,194 --> 00:08:43,061 I'm assuming more than half the risk. 213 00:08:43,095 --> 00:08:44,696 - Half is fair. - Not really. 214 00:08:44,730 --> 00:08:47,399 Because they're ours, all 100% of them. 215 00:08:47,433 --> 00:08:49,868 Giving you half is not fair, it's silly. 216 00:08:49,902 --> 00:08:52,137 Okay, good luck. You wanna re-blindfold me? 217 00:08:52,171 --> 00:08:54,606 I know we're in E-9 in the east wing. 218 00:08:54,640 --> 00:08:56,675 I know that because it smells like weed. 219 00:08:56,709 --> 00:08:58,677 Not my weed. 220 00:08:58,711 --> 00:09:01,379 Look, I'm willing to give her half. 221 00:09:01,414 --> 00:09:03,448 Hear that, Britta? You can have half of Jeff's share. 222 00:09:03,483 --> 00:09:05,016 That's not what I meant. 223 00:09:05,051 --> 00:09:06,284 That's what you're offering by giving her half of the total. 224 00:09:06,319 --> 00:09:08,019 Either she can get half of all of our money 225 00:09:08,054 --> 00:09:09,154 or she can get half of your share. 226 00:09:09,188 --> 00:09:11,156 Either way, you walk away with about 16%. 227 00:09:11,190 --> 00:09:12,691 - That's not fair. - Damn right. 228 00:09:12,725 --> 00:09:14,893 Here's what is: 25% for each of us. 229 00:09:14,927 --> 00:09:17,562 Take it or leave it, Britta. 230 00:09:17,597 --> 00:09:18,964 ♪ Legalize it ♪ 231 00:09:18,998 --> 00:09:22,000 ♪ Don't Chang... ♪ 232 00:09:22,034 --> 00:09:26,338 Hey, guys. 233 00:09:26,372 --> 00:09:27,873 Hey. 234 00:09:27,907 --> 00:09:31,109 Look, if something sketchy is happening, I don't care. 235 00:09:31,144 --> 00:09:34,446 So I'm just gonna back out of the room now and... 236 00:09:34,480 --> 00:09:35,780 He can't leave. 237 00:09:35,815 --> 00:09:37,782 No! No! 238 00:09:37,817 --> 00:09:40,886 I didn't see anything. I did not see anything! 239 00:09:40,920 --> 00:09:43,822 - Britta, find some rope. - I've got rope. 240 00:09:43,856 --> 00:09:46,391 "Each player starts with six bullet tokens, 241 00:09:46,425 --> 00:09:50,262 ten gold certificates, and a color-coded posse token." 242 00:09:50,296 --> 00:09:52,130 There's two types of tokens? 243 00:09:52,165 --> 00:09:53,632 I'm sure we'll figure it out. 244 00:09:54,700 --> 00:09:55,767 Howdy! 245 00:09:55,801 --> 00:09:58,436 You look like a real group of gunslingers. 246 00:09:58,471 --> 00:10:00,105 Everyone in town's mighty scared, 247 00:10:00,139 --> 00:10:02,140 what with all the gold and the outlaws. 248 00:10:02,174 --> 00:10:05,410 But only one of us can make it out alive. 249 00:10:05,444 --> 00:10:06,745 Are we robbing the town? 250 00:10:06,779 --> 00:10:09,281 By now, you should have your bullets, your gold, 251 00:10:09,315 --> 00:10:11,883 and two Wild West tokens each. 252 00:10:11,918 --> 00:10:14,119 Hang onto those tokens no matter what. 253 00:10:14,153 --> 00:10:15,987 - There's two kinds of tokens. - Two each? 254 00:10:16,022 --> 00:10:18,523 Now when you hear the word "draw," 255 00:10:18,558 --> 00:10:21,126 or when you see a square with a color or number matching 256 00:10:21,160 --> 00:10:22,694 one of you or your opponent's cards, 257 00:10:22,728 --> 00:10:24,796 the first one of you to say, "bang," 258 00:10:24,831 --> 00:10:26,731 wins the challenged player's token 259 00:10:26,766 --> 00:10:28,934 and the amount of their bid in gold! 260 00:10:28,968 --> 00:10:30,302 - What's going on? - Shh! 261 00:10:30,336 --> 00:10:31,336 - Ready? - Yes? 262 00:10:31,337 --> 00:10:32,838 - I'm not. - Shh! 263 00:10:41,881 --> 00:10:43,682 - Are we supposed to be bidding? - Draw! 264 00:10:43,716 --> 00:10:44,783 - I bid! - Pow! Bang! 265 00:10:44,817 --> 00:10:46,084 Rattler! 266 00:10:46,119 --> 00:10:47,119 Bang! 5! 267 00:10:47,120 --> 00:10:48,386 - Bang? - Yee-haw! 268 00:10:48,421 --> 00:10:49,421 - Bang-bang! 5! - Bang? 269 00:10:49,455 --> 00:10:50,856 Not bad! 270 00:10:50,890 --> 00:10:53,051 Collect your tokens and let's get on to the next round! 271 00:10:53,059 --> 00:10:54,893 What are you doing? Stop that. 272 00:10:54,927 --> 00:10:56,161 He said, "Collect your tokens." 273 00:10:56,195 --> 00:10:57,295 He can't see you. 274 00:10:57,330 --> 00:10:59,631 Didn't Abed shoot whoever's 5? 275 00:10:59,665 --> 00:11:01,700 - Draw! - Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! 276 00:11:01,734 --> 00:11:03,935 Odd-numbered players, give up two cards! 277 00:11:03,970 --> 00:11:05,837 - Draw! - We have numbers? 278 00:11:05,872 --> 00:11:07,906 Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang. 279 00:11:07,940 --> 00:11:09,174 Okay, okay, I don't think we're doing this right. 280 00:11:09,208 --> 00:11:11,276 Are we sure this is a game and not some art film? 281 00:11:11,310 --> 00:11:13,145 - Now what do we do? - We rewind it and start over. 282 00:11:13,179 --> 00:11:15,747 - Okay, I'll allow it. - No, it's okay. 283 00:11:15,782 --> 00:11:16,882 We gave it our best shot, no? 284 00:11:18,050 --> 00:11:20,051 I'm sorry, Rachel, is this your home? 285 00:11:20,086 --> 00:11:21,520 Oh, God, no, I'm sorry. 286 00:11:21,554 --> 00:11:23,828 - Well, this is what we're playing. - But it doesn't make any sense. 287 00:11:23,856 --> 00:11:25,690 Oh! It sounds like Anthony wants to forfeit. 288 00:11:25,725 --> 00:11:28,760 - He doesn't. Don't forfeit, Anthony. - Rachel, we can do this. 289 00:11:28,794 --> 00:11:29,861 Just focus, okay? 290 00:11:29,896 --> 00:11:32,898 - Okay... - Okay. 291 00:11:34,133 --> 00:11:36,134 - Howdy! - Howdy. 292 00:11:37,036 --> 00:11:40,071 I love textbooks. That's why I stole these. 293 00:11:40,106 --> 00:11:41,807 - All right, knock it off. - What? 294 00:11:41,841 --> 00:11:46,278 You gotta make it sound believable or you're not getting outta here. 295 00:11:46,312 --> 00:11:47,971 - I'm trying. - Try harder! 296 00:11:48,005 --> 00:11:49,439 Go. 297 00:11:51,476 --> 00:11:55,111 I love textbooks. That's why I stole them. 298 00:11:55,146 --> 00:11:56,613 Mm. 299 00:11:56,647 --> 00:11:57,948 Look at this one. 300 00:12:00,017 --> 00:12:01,918 Stolen textbooks are the best kind. 301 00:12:01,953 --> 00:12:04,387 I stole all these books and put 'em in this room 302 00:12:04,422 --> 00:12:06,323 so I could come kiss them. 303 00:12:06,357 --> 00:12:08,024 That's all, thank you. 304 00:12:08,059 --> 00:12:10,827 Please, I'm on parole! 305 00:12:10,862 --> 00:12:11,862 Exactly. 306 00:12:11,896 --> 00:12:14,598 So keep your mouth shut or we'll send this file to everybody. 307 00:12:14,632 --> 00:12:15,632 What do you mean "everybody"? 308 00:12:15,666 --> 00:12:19,636 Everybody! 309 00:12:21,672 --> 00:12:23,006 - Look, I can't do this anymore. - What? 310 00:12:23,040 --> 00:12:24,040 I'm out. 311 00:12:24,075 --> 00:12:26,042 It's too far, it's too... 312 00:12:26,077 --> 00:12:28,011 evil. 313 00:12:28,045 --> 00:12:29,679 Look, you guys can split the money. 314 00:12:29,714 --> 00:12:31,014 I'm just gonna leave quietly. 315 00:12:31,048 --> 00:12:34,017 Good-bye. 316 00:12:38,022 --> 00:12:39,022 What the hell? 317 00:12:39,056 --> 00:12:40,624 - Yeah? - What the hell? Ow! 318 00:12:40,658 --> 00:12:42,926 I can't let you leave until we're done with this deal. 319 00:12:42,960 --> 00:12:45,128 Shirley, this is not what God wants you to be doing today! 320 00:12:45,163 --> 00:12:46,663 We had our chance to think about that. 321 00:12:46,697 --> 00:12:48,398 He dropped this on us like a ton of bricks. 322 00:12:48,433 --> 00:12:49,466 Right, Hickey? 323 00:12:49,500 --> 00:12:51,001 Oh, yeah, definitely. 324 00:12:51,035 --> 00:12:53,003 Not to say that this isn't getting insane. 325 00:12:54,605 --> 00:12:57,374 Blackhat Bill sure ain't the forgivin' type. 326 00:12:57,408 --> 00:12:59,276 - You! Green player! - Yes, partner? 327 00:12:59,310 --> 00:13:00,310 You can do better than that, can't you? 328 00:13:00,344 --> 00:13:01,778 Yes, pard-ner! 329 00:13:01,813 --> 00:13:03,246 Pick another player that you want to draw a cactus card. 330 00:13:03,281 --> 00:13:04,281 I choose Anthony! 331 00:13:04,315 --> 00:13:06,283 Anthony, draw a card. 332 00:13:06,317 --> 00:13:08,185 Oh! This is a good one. 333 00:13:08,219 --> 00:13:09,419 Keep this for when you're in a quick draw. 334 00:13:09,454 --> 00:13:10,954 - Rachel, your turn! - What do I do? 335 00:13:10,988 --> 00:13:12,122 You roll, you roll. Here. 336 00:13:12,156 --> 00:13:14,791 - There. My turn. - Stop! Snake bite! Lose a turn. 337 00:13:14,826 --> 00:13:16,259 - Anti-venom. - I'll take two. 338 00:13:16,294 --> 00:13:17,394 - Draw! - Bang! 339 00:13:17,428 --> 00:13:18,895 - Okay, I bid 5 bullets. - I raise 6. 340 00:13:18,930 --> 00:13:20,464 - 11. - Pass. Reverse! 341 00:13:20,498 --> 00:13:22,332 - Hold it! Yee-haw! 342 00:13:22,366 --> 00:13:23,567 Did you remember to say "yee-haw"? 343 00:13:23,601 --> 00:13:26,503 Anyone that didn't loses a turn. 344 00:13:26,537 --> 00:13:28,371 Collect your coins! 345 00:13:28,406 --> 00:13:29,906 Anthony, I'll trade you two snakes for a bullet. 346 00:13:29,941 --> 00:13:32,509 - Just say yes! - I don't wanna die. 347 00:13:32,543 --> 00:13:33,810 - Stop her, Rachel, stop her! - Bang? 348 00:13:33,845 --> 00:13:34,845 No! Bid 5! 349 00:13:34,846 --> 00:13:37,180 - Tornado! - Tornado! 350 00:13:37,215 --> 00:13:38,515 9 tornado! 351 00:13:38,549 --> 00:13:39,549 Pass! 7! 352 00:13:39,584 --> 00:13:40,750 - Reverse! - 2 tornado! 353 00:13:40,785 --> 00:13:41,852 - Pass! - Double! 354 00:13:41,886 --> 00:13:43,053 - Draw! - Bang! 355 00:13:43,087 --> 00:13:45,155 Oh, come on. 356 00:13:45,189 --> 00:13:47,190 - You son of a bitch! - Come on. 357 00:13:47,225 --> 00:13:48,925 Come on, come on. 358 00:13:48,960 --> 00:13:50,360 Come on, come on. 359 00:13:50,394 --> 00:13:51,661 Come on! 360 00:13:54,732 --> 00:13:56,133 If one of you rolled your bullet number, 361 00:13:56,167 --> 00:13:57,934 you're the winner! 362 00:13:57,969 --> 00:14:02,005 Fast-forward to the red screen to get your gold. 363 00:14:02,039 --> 00:14:05,275 Well, more food for the buzzards. 364 00:14:05,309 --> 00:14:08,779 Looks like modern times... 365 00:14:08,813 --> 00:14:10,113 have come after all. 366 00:14:10,148 --> 00:14:11,882 See ya in the city. 367 00:14:11,916 --> 00:14:13,717 I wanna go home. 368 00:14:13,751 --> 00:14:15,231 - Me too. - No, we have to play again. 369 00:14:15,253 --> 00:14:18,088 Abed, I think you're having one of your special times, okay? 370 00:14:18,122 --> 00:14:19,489 So I'm gonna give you some space. 371 00:14:19,524 --> 00:14:20,724 I don't want space. I want you to move in here. 372 00:14:20,758 --> 00:14:21,958 - What? - But that's not resolved! 373 00:14:21,993 --> 00:14:23,314 - Anthony might move in, so... - What? 374 00:14:23,327 --> 00:14:24,795 We want one of you to live with us. 375 00:14:24,829 --> 00:14:27,297 Yeah, we're settling it with a game of Pile of Bullets. 376 00:14:27,331 --> 00:14:29,399 That is not an explanation 377 00:14:29,434 --> 00:14:34,137 that should make anybody want to live here. 378 00:14:34,172 --> 00:14:36,773 Abed, I don't like this side of you, 379 00:14:36,808 --> 00:14:39,509 and I do not like that side of VCR technology. 380 00:14:39,544 --> 00:14:42,045 I am glad that it's a dead medium. 381 00:14:42,080 --> 00:14:44,080 That was very uncomfortable. 382 00:14:49,420 --> 00:14:51,388 I don't really know how girlfriends work, 383 00:14:51,422 --> 00:14:55,058 but I don't think you have one anymore. 384 00:15:00,501 --> 00:15:02,402 Okay, cool. See you there. 385 00:15:02,436 --> 00:15:03,470 I'm meeting my guy in an hour. 386 00:15:03,504 --> 00:15:05,405 He wants to see a sample, set a price, 387 00:15:05,439 --> 00:15:06,573 and then we'll do the exchange. 388 00:15:06,607 --> 00:15:08,174 Oh, brother. 389 00:15:08,209 --> 00:15:09,442 So Britta doesn't know how much she's getting 390 00:15:09,477 --> 00:15:11,211 from this guy that none of us will ever see again. 391 00:15:11,245 --> 00:15:13,413 But she knows one thing for sure: 392 00:15:13,447 --> 00:15:16,249 She'll be right back with it so you can divvy it up, 393 00:15:16,283 --> 00:15:17,283 even Steven. 394 00:15:21,255 --> 00:15:22,689 Oh, man, that is rich. 395 00:15:22,723 --> 00:15:24,924 What's supposed to stop her from robbing you guys blind? 396 00:15:24,959 --> 00:15:26,426 What are you gonna do, call the cops? 397 00:15:26,460 --> 00:15:28,628 - I'll go with her. - Oh, yeah. Good plan. 398 00:15:28,662 --> 00:15:30,997 Yeah, leave Hickey here, and the two of you do the deal. 399 00:15:31,031 --> 00:15:32,098 Yeah, what the hell? 400 00:15:32,133 --> 00:15:33,694 When did I volunteer for Guantanamo duty 401 00:15:33,701 --> 00:15:36,069 while you two traipse off 402 00:15:36,103 --> 00:15:38,438 to the Cuban equivalent of Las Vegas? 403 00:15:38,472 --> 00:15:40,040 Havana, right? 404 00:15:40,074 --> 00:15:42,642 Guys, don't listen to Jeff. He's just trying to divide us. 405 00:15:42,677 --> 00:15:45,678 Says the woman who's willing to take care of the cash by herself. 406 00:15:45,713 --> 00:15:47,380 As if you're Mr. Trustworthy. 407 00:15:47,415 --> 00:15:49,682 Why do you have so much access to rope? 408 00:15:49,717 --> 00:15:51,217 Hey, you're the one who left the door unlocked 409 00:15:51,252 --> 00:15:52,652 so Chang could get in here. 410 00:15:52,686 --> 00:15:54,020 How do I know you didn't do that on purpose? 411 00:15:54,054 --> 00:15:57,524 Guys. Guys! Calm down. 412 00:15:57,558 --> 00:15:58,925 I'm sure we can work this out. 413 00:15:58,959 --> 00:16:02,262 We just need to stay cool and talk it through. 414 00:16:02,296 --> 00:16:03,863 I'm sorry. 415 00:16:03,898 --> 00:16:06,800 That didn't work out the way I planned. 416 00:16:06,834 --> 00:16:09,863 I'm sorry. But you didn't leave me any choice. 417 00:16:09,870 --> 00:16:11,471 You were acting very poorly, 418 00:16:11,505 --> 00:16:13,206 I didn't know if I could trust you anymore! 419 00:16:13,240 --> 00:16:15,375 You dragged me into this. 420 00:16:15,409 --> 00:16:16,643 I didn't want this. 421 00:16:16,677 --> 00:16:19,612 Huh? 422 00:16:22,083 --> 00:16:24,951 - You're packing? - Yeah. 423 00:16:24,985 --> 00:16:26,920 - You're leaving? - Yeah. 424 00:16:26,954 --> 00:16:28,388 - Because of last night? - Yeah. 425 00:16:28,422 --> 00:16:31,124 I just think there's some unresolved issues here. 426 00:16:31,158 --> 00:16:33,293 You're right. 427 00:16:33,327 --> 00:16:36,229 I'm still really hurt by mom turning her back on me 428 00:16:36,263 --> 00:16:38,565 when I went to rehab. 429 00:16:38,599 --> 00:16:41,334 And I guess part of me was mad at you 430 00:16:41,368 --> 00:16:42,869 for siding with her, 431 00:16:42,903 --> 00:16:47,273 so I thought you moving in here was some kind of moral victory. 432 00:16:47,308 --> 00:16:48,308 What? No. 433 00:16:48,309 --> 00:16:49,476 I mean unresolved issues 434 00:16:49,510 --> 00:16:50,877 involving the black guy in all these photographs. 435 00:16:50,911 --> 00:16:53,380 - Troy? - Hey, I don't know his name, man. 436 00:16:53,414 --> 00:16:56,449 I just know he's clearly left some kind of vacuum. 437 00:16:56,484 --> 00:16:58,585 And screw you. What did I have to do with mom? 438 00:16:58,619 --> 00:17:00,487 I was 13. 439 00:17:06,260 --> 00:17:08,027 - Hey. - Hi. 440 00:17:08,062 --> 00:17:09,763 I'm here to do my third-act apology. 441 00:17:09,797 --> 00:17:10,830 - Abed, I don't think... - Wait. 442 00:17:10,865 --> 00:17:13,099 Don't reject it until the whole thing's been served up. 443 00:17:13,134 --> 00:17:15,301 Dobry. 444 00:17:15,336 --> 00:17:18,305 Open your locker please. 445 00:17:25,046 --> 00:17:27,347 - Hey. - Hey. 446 00:17:27,381 --> 00:17:29,783 - I wanna tell you something. - Abed, this is adorable. 447 00:17:29,817 --> 00:17:32,217 Just because it's adorable doesn't mean it's not important. 448 00:17:32,219 --> 00:17:34,421 Listen. 449 00:17:34,455 --> 00:17:35,822 I've been accelerating our relationship 450 00:17:35,856 --> 00:17:38,358 because I've been worried I wouldn't pass a lot of the tests. 451 00:17:38,392 --> 00:17:39,693 I wanted you to move in because I thought 452 00:17:39,727 --> 00:17:42,262 if Annie was around, I'd have less chance of screwing things up. 453 00:17:42,296 --> 00:17:44,397 You're not screwing things up, though. 454 00:17:44,432 --> 00:17:46,266 That's good to know. 455 00:17:46,300 --> 00:17:47,934 But the problem with me will always be 456 00:17:47,968 --> 00:17:49,602 that I can never know for sure. 457 00:17:49,637 --> 00:17:50,770 There's not a huge amount of people in my life 458 00:17:50,805 --> 00:17:52,285 that haven't eventually kicked me out, 459 00:17:52,306 --> 00:17:56,276 and I don't always see it coming. 460 00:17:56,310 --> 00:17:57,844 I don't want it to happen with you. 461 00:17:57,878 --> 00:18:00,480 Well, don't manipulate me and don't keep secrets from me 462 00:18:00,514 --> 00:18:02,782 and we'll probably be okay. 463 00:18:02,817 --> 00:18:04,350 Cool. 464 00:18:04,385 --> 00:18:08,621 It stopped raining. 465 00:18:08,656 --> 00:18:10,423 Yeah, it sure did. 466 00:18:13,394 --> 00:18:15,762 Aww, you hired a stunt person. 467 00:18:15,796 --> 00:18:17,957 No, I did not. 468 00:18:19,700 --> 00:18:20,867 Where'd you get these? 469 00:18:20,901 --> 00:18:23,536 They were an inheritance from my father. 470 00:18:23,571 --> 00:18:26,239 - He was a collector. - Mmhmm. 471 00:18:26,273 --> 00:18:28,475 - How many? - 120. 472 00:18:28,509 --> 00:18:30,777 Well, for the whole bunch, maybe 20. 473 00:18:30,811 --> 00:18:31,878 - Thousand? - Dollars. 474 00:18:31,912 --> 00:18:33,646 - $20,000? - 20 non-thousand dollars. 475 00:18:33,681 --> 00:18:34,881 20 regular dollars. 476 00:18:34,915 --> 00:18:36,716 You might get that from a recycling place. 477 00:18:36,751 --> 00:18:39,953 These are misprints, honey. Check out page 105. 478 00:18:39,987 --> 00:18:42,155 Well, I can't because there's no page numbers. 479 00:18:42,189 --> 00:18:43,990 Ah! Well, that would be a problem. 480 00:18:44,025 --> 00:18:45,825 You know, "Class, turn to page..." 481 00:18:45,860 --> 00:18:47,293 There is no page... 482 00:18:47,328 --> 00:18:49,662 Oh, well, if there's no page number, you can't turn to it. 483 00:18:49,697 --> 00:18:51,931 I've better things to do with my life. 484 00:19:07,919 --> 00:19:09,359 Although we haven't been saying it, 485 00:19:09,383 --> 00:19:12,018 Troy was an important part of our apartment. 486 00:19:12,053 --> 00:19:14,921 - He kept the peace. - Yeah. 487 00:19:14,955 --> 00:19:17,190 Goin' a little crazy without him. 488 00:19:17,224 --> 00:19:20,226 Maybe we need to live with a therapist. 489 00:19:20,261 --> 00:19:22,262 Or at least someone crazier than us. 490 00:19:29,648 --> 00:19:32,105 - Let's give Craigslist another try. - I think Craigslist is the way to go. 491 00:19:32,139 --> 00:19:33,500 - Yeah, that's a good idea. - Yeah. 492 00:19:33,507 --> 00:19:36,409 Are you guys all wearing the same clothes from yesterday? 493 00:19:36,444 --> 00:19:37,644 We've been through some stuff. 494 00:19:37,678 --> 00:19:39,079 But we learned something. 495 00:19:39,113 --> 00:19:40,447 No, we didn't. 496 00:19:40,481 --> 00:19:42,749 We learned that sometimes there's no lesson. 497 00:19:42,783 --> 00:19:44,585 - How is that learning? - We played Pile of Bullets. 498 00:19:44,695 --> 00:19:46,186 Can we just get this meeting over with? 499 00:19:46,220 --> 00:19:48,321 - So how'd the cleanup go? - I learned how to smile. 500 00:19:48,355 --> 00:19:49,956 Don't step, don't step to me. 501 00:19:49,990 --> 00:19:52,525 I like coffee and water, don't step to me. 502 00:19:52,560 --> 00:19:55,995 Uh, damn it! I lost it. I lost it! 503 00:19:56,705 --> 00:20:00,574 Okay. I will get back to you. Thanks. 504 00:20:00,608 --> 00:20:02,401 - Who was that, sweetie? - Guess they want me 505 00:20:02,478 --> 00:20:06,513 for that Wild West videotape board game thing. 506 00:20:06,548 --> 00:20:08,048 - Pile of Bullets? - Yeah. 507 00:20:10,619 --> 00:20:12,220 Devin, you pick up that phone right now 508 00:20:12,254 --> 00:20:14,655 and you call these people and you tell 'em you want this part. 509 00:20:14,689 --> 00:20:19,059 These VCR games is where everything is headed. 510 00:20:19,094 --> 00:20:20,361 Can't you see that? 511 00:20:20,395 --> 00:20:24,198 You just became the Luke Skywalker 512 00:20:24,232 --> 00:20:25,599 of the new Star Wars. 513 00:20:25,634 --> 00:20:27,334 - We've gotta move. - We do? 514 00:20:27,369 --> 00:20:28,569 Oh, yes, indeedy. 515 00:20:28,603 --> 00:20:31,071 We have got to move to Los Angeles. 516 00:20:31,106 --> 00:20:32,573 But I work here. 517 00:20:32,607 --> 00:20:33,640 Oh, please. 518 00:20:33,675 --> 00:20:35,743 You call Apple computers work? 519 00:20:35,777 --> 00:20:38,312 What kind of company offers stock options 520 00:20:38,346 --> 00:20:39,747 as a Christmas bonus? 521 00:20:39,781 --> 00:20:43,317 That ship is sinkin'. 522 00:20:43,351 --> 00:20:45,386 Sweetie, remember when we were talkin' 523 00:20:45,420 --> 00:20:46,954 about trying cocaine? 524 00:20:46,988 --> 00:20:48,355 Yeah... 525 00:20:48,390 --> 00:20:51,859 I think we should start looking for some right now. 526 00:20:51,893 --> 00:20:54,695 Because we're gonna be able to afford it. 527 00:20:54,729 --> 00:20:57,097 Okay. I mean, if you're sure. 528 00:20:57,132 --> 00:21:00,301 I've never been more sure about anything in my entire life. 529 00:21:00,335 --> 00:21:02,878 Pile of Bullets. 530 00:21:03,113 --> 00:21:05,017 Pile of Bullets. 531 00:21:05,052 --> 00:21:06,376 Oh, yes! 532 00:21:06,577 --> 00:21:12,415 Sync and corrected by Elderfel www.addic7ed.com