1
00:00:01,087 --> 00:00:03,352
By the end of WWII President Roosevelt's
2
00:00:03,362 --> 00:00:05,710
body had finally succumbed
to the polio
3
00:00:05,830 --> 00:00:10,177
that afflicted him
his entire life.
4
00:00:10,212 --> 00:00:12,580
Which brings me to
the Yalta Conference.
5
00:00:12,614 --> 00:00:14,732
Who can tell me three
key points brought up there?
6
00:00:14,783 --> 00:00:16,150
Annie.
7
00:00:16,218 --> 00:00:17,218
The demilitarization
of Germany--
8
00:00:17,252 --> 00:00:18,219
I'm sorry.
9
00:00:18,253 --> 00:00:20,204
Annie Kim.
10
00:00:20,238 --> 00:00:22,139
The demilitarization
of Germany,
11
00:00:22,174 --> 00:00:23,524
the establishment
of Poland's borders
12
00:00:23,558 --> 00:00:25,359
and the formation of
the United Nations.
13
00:00:25,393 --> 00:00:27,728
Side note: The results
of Yalta would later
14
00:00:27,763 --> 00:00:29,396
set the stage for the Cold War.
15
00:00:29,431 --> 00:00:31,532
Oh, boy, spoiler alert.
16
00:00:31,566 --> 00:00:36,470
Somebody just won
a ride in the wheelchair.
17
00:00:36,505 --> 00:00:38,389
I'm proud of you
for deciding on a major, Britta.
18
00:00:38,423 --> 00:00:39,840
I'd like to thank the lord
in my prayers about you,
19
00:00:39,874 --> 00:00:41,926
but you're still dressing
like a streetwalker.
20
00:00:41,977 --> 00:00:43,227
Yep, I'm getting serious.
21
00:00:43,261 --> 00:00:45,396
I got a backpack,
I got a new notebook.
22
00:00:45,430 --> 00:00:47,431
Oh, I got one of
those see-through yellow pens
23
00:00:47,482 --> 00:00:49,266
so I can do that thing
where you color in the words.
24
00:00:49,317 --> 00:00:50,434
Highlight?
25
00:00:50,485 --> 00:00:51,902
Probably the backpack.
26
00:00:51,937 --> 00:00:53,187
Free the damascus three.
27
00:00:53,221 --> 00:00:55,856
Oh, thanks.
Oh, whoa.
28
00:00:55,890 --> 00:00:56,991
I know this girl.
29
00:00:57,025 --> 00:00:58,659
We used to protest together
all the time
30
00:00:58,693 --> 00:01:00,561
and now she's locked up
in Syria.
31
00:01:00,579 --> 00:01:01,779
Oh, that's terrible.
32
00:01:01,830 --> 00:01:03,164
Yes, it's terrible.
33
00:01:03,198 --> 00:01:04,915
She's imprisoned
by an oppressive regime
34
00:01:04,950 --> 00:01:07,168
halfway around the world
and I'm, what?
35
00:01:07,202 --> 00:01:08,452
In college?
36
00:01:08,503 --> 00:01:10,504
Where are my values?
37
00:01:10,539 --> 00:01:13,841
Man, she's got
a Facebook group?
38
00:01:13,875 --> 00:01:16,177
My first cop flashlight.
39
00:01:16,381 --> 00:01:19,430
Can't wait to get some brains
on this bad boy.
40
00:01:19,464 --> 00:01:21,148
Are you safe, ma'am?
Everything okay?
41
00:01:21,183 --> 00:01:22,583
Is this guy bothering you?
44
00:01:25,770 --> 00:01:27,354
The badge says
to serve and protect!
45
00:01:27,389 --> 00:01:28,973
No, it doesn't.
46
00:01:29,024 --> 00:01:32,660
"How's my smile?"
Oh, man.
47
00:01:32,694 --> 00:01:34,478
What the hell am I
in charge of?
48
00:01:34,529 --> 00:01:36,096
See this garbage can?
49
00:01:36,114 --> 00:01:38,432
Students coming out
of the library bump into it.
50
00:01:38,450 --> 00:01:40,701
You can serve and protect them
from a nasty boo-boo.
51
00:01:40,735 --> 00:01:41,969
What do I do if I see a crime?
52
00:01:42,003 --> 00:01:43,971
What a security guard does--
53
00:01:44,005 --> 00:01:45,906
Call a cop.
54
00:01:45,940 --> 00:01:47,491
Where'd you even get these?
55
00:01:47,542 --> 00:01:49,043
- Come on, let me keep them.
- No.
56
00:01:49,077 --> 00:01:51,378
Please?
I swear they're just for sex!
57
00:01:51,403 --> 00:02:00,603
Sync & corrected by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
58
00:02:01,223 --> 00:02:05,726
♪ We could be roped up,
tied up, dead in a year ♪
59
00:02:05,760 --> 00:02:11,015
♪ I can't count the reasons
I should stay ♪
60
00:02:11,066 --> 00:02:16,270
♪ one by one they all
just fade away ♪
61
00:02:18,240 --> 00:02:23,645
And this ragtag group
of cut-ups is my study group.
62
00:02:23,765 --> 00:02:26,700
Gang, this is Annie Kim
from my Poli-Sci class.
63
00:02:26,734 --> 00:02:29,069
We just figured out we had
the same G.P.A. in high school.
64
00:02:29,079 --> 00:02:31,438
Well, mine was higher if you
consider my school's ranking.
65
00:02:31,448 --> 00:02:33,507
Well, it sounds like you had
a lighter course load, so.
66
00:02:33,541 --> 00:02:34,608
Well, I was in a lot of clubs.
67
00:02:34,642 --> 00:02:36,009
I founded 17 of them.
68
00:02:36,044 --> 00:02:37,511
Well, I was actually thinking
about founding a model U.N.
69
00:02:37,545 --> 00:02:39,179
here at Greendale.
Any interest?
70
00:02:39,714 --> 00:02:40,647
I'll probably be busy,
71
00:02:40,682 --> 00:02:42,249
and you probably need to study,
72
00:02:42,283 --> 00:02:43,600
so see you in class.
73
00:02:43,651 --> 00:02:46,487
Okay, goodbye.
74
00:02:46,521 --> 00:02:48,388
Wow, Annie.
75
00:02:48,406 --> 00:02:50,757
How progressive of you to have
a multicultural evil twin.
76
00:02:50,792 --> 00:02:51,758
An Asian Annie.
77
00:02:51,793 --> 00:02:53,494
Obama's America.
78
00:02:53,528 --> 00:02:55,762
Her name is Annie Kim,
79
00:02:55,797 --> 00:02:56,797
and she's not evil.
80
00:02:56,831 --> 00:02:57,831
She's my friend.
81
00:02:57,866 --> 00:02:59,099
Didn't look like it.
82
00:02:59,134 --> 00:03:00,567
Yeah, you seemed pretty
competitive with her.
83
00:03:00,585 --> 00:03:02,769
You be careful, Annie.
They are ruthless.
84
00:03:02,804 --> 00:03:04,271
What?
85
00:03:04,305 --> 00:03:06,072
What? Not Asians.
86
00:03:06,090 --> 00:03:07,090
Women.
87
00:03:07,125 --> 00:03:08,642
I'm not competing with her.
88
00:03:08,676 --> 00:03:10,076
I find her adorable.
89
00:03:10,094 --> 00:03:11,411
She's like a younger me.
90
00:03:11,446 --> 00:03:12,963
You mean the younger you
that took so much Adderall
91
00:03:13,014 --> 00:03:14,414
she tried to straighten
the lines on our high school
92
00:03:14,432 --> 00:03:15,782
football field during a game?
93
00:03:15,817 --> 00:03:17,251
Ooh, be careful, Annie.
94
00:03:17,285 --> 00:03:18,285
You don't want this little girl
95
00:03:18,319 --> 00:03:19,620
to suck you back
to the dark side.
96
00:03:19,654 --> 00:03:21,788
Hey, guys,
what're you trying to do here?
97
00:03:21,823 --> 00:03:23,089
This is our Annie.
98
00:03:23,107 --> 00:03:25,492
That little twerp
is a can of Annie lite.
99
00:03:25,527 --> 00:03:27,027
She couldn't hold a candle
to the real thing
100
00:03:27,061 --> 00:03:30,030
in any category of anything.
101
00:03:30,064 --> 00:03:31,431
Aw, well, I wasn't
fishing for that.
102
00:03:31,466 --> 00:03:34,001
You're the best, kiddo.
103
00:03:34,035 --> 00:03:35,002
You know what else
was the best?
104
00:03:35,036 --> 00:03:36,236
The rainforests.
105
00:03:36,270 --> 00:03:38,572
Too bad the fascist oligarchies
are raping them
106
00:03:38,606 --> 00:03:42,042
to make hamburgers.
Look it up.
107
00:03:43,711 --> 00:03:45,679
Looks like someone woke up
on the regular side of the bed.
108
00:03:45,713 --> 00:03:47,247
Britta's just having
a rough time
109
00:03:47,282 --> 00:03:49,049
because her friend's in prison.
110
00:03:49,083 --> 00:03:50,317
I went to her Facebook page.
111
00:03:50,351 --> 00:03:53,287
It says she was tear-gassed
and possibly beaten.
112
00:03:53,321 --> 00:03:55,889
I haven't been tear-gassed
in so long.
113
00:03:55,924 --> 00:03:57,474
Well, you're on a new path now.
114
00:03:57,508 --> 00:03:59,826
Oh, goody, a new path.
115
00:03:59,861 --> 00:04:03,230
Is it lined with credit cards
and flat screen TVs?
116
00:04:03,264 --> 00:04:05,365
Does it go by an Ikea?
117
00:04:05,400 --> 00:04:06,733
Maybe I don't want a new path!
118
00:04:06,768 --> 00:04:07,818
Or any path.
119
00:04:07,852 --> 00:04:10,487
Maybe my path is a war path
120
00:04:10,521 --> 00:04:14,441
that leads
to the terrordome, n-words!
121
00:04:14,475 --> 00:04:16,843
Okay, maybe I went too far.
122
00:04:16,878 --> 00:04:19,312
Maybe I don't want to offend
my African-American friends,
123
00:04:19,330 --> 00:04:21,198
but the larger point is,
124
00:04:21,249 --> 00:04:26,336
maybe I'm not done
raging against the machine.
125
00:04:26,371 --> 00:04:27,354
Raging against the what?
126
00:04:27,388 --> 00:04:28,522
That sounds dangerous.
127
00:04:28,556 --> 00:04:31,058
Don't worry.
She'll be bad at it.
128
00:04:31,092 --> 00:04:33,010
Keep clear of the can.
129
00:04:33,044 --> 00:04:35,064
Sir, step around the can.
130
00:04:37,498 --> 00:04:40,717
Mind the can, student.
131
00:04:45,356 --> 00:04:48,342
♪ Hello ♪
132
00:04:49,276 --> 00:04:52,562
♪ is it me you're looking for ♪
133
00:04:53,114 --> 00:04:55,749
♪ I can see it in your eyes ♪
134
00:04:55,783 --> 00:04:57,517
You just got yourself
a warning.
135
00:04:57,535 --> 00:04:59,403
I piss warnings, pig.
136
00:05:01,154 --> 00:05:04,858
♪ You're all
I ever wanted... ♪
137
00:05:18,739 --> 00:05:20,741
And that's how we do that.
138
00:05:21,575 --> 00:05:22,643
Hey!
139
00:05:22,977 --> 00:05:25,679
I got my eye on you, missy.
140
00:05:39,608 --> 00:05:40,761
Hi.
141
00:05:40,763 --> 00:05:42,429
You okay, kiddo?
142
00:05:42,463 --> 00:05:44,364
Yeah, yeah.
You know what's funny?
143
00:05:44,399 --> 00:05:45,499
This is so silly.
144
00:05:45,533 --> 00:05:47,501
Remember little Annie Kim
from Poli-Sci?
145
00:05:47,535 --> 00:05:49,703
Boy, she just...
took my model U.N. idea
146
00:05:49,737 --> 00:05:52,122
and just...
147
00:05:52,173 --> 00:05:53,740
She is quite
the little go-getter.
148
00:05:53,775 --> 00:05:55,342
Wait, what?
149
00:05:55,376 --> 00:05:56,460
She stole your idea?
150
00:05:56,511 --> 00:05:57,627
Sneak attack.
151
00:05:57,679 --> 00:05:59,513
That's just like--
152
00:05:59,547 --> 00:06:01,515
Not women, Asians.
153
00:06:01,549 --> 00:06:04,051
Well, the real important thing
is that there is a model U.N.
154
00:06:04,085 --> 00:06:06,053
It doesn't really matter
who starts it.
155
00:06:06,087 --> 00:06:08,121
It just means her name
goes on some charter
156
00:06:08,156 --> 00:06:10,107
and she gets to put it
on her résumé.
157
00:06:10,141 --> 00:06:13,026
And lead the Greendale team
to the national model U.N.,
158
00:06:13,061 --> 00:06:16,262
and meet Kofi Annan, Boutros
Boutros Ghali, and Will.I.Am.
159
00:06:16,280 --> 00:06:18,281
Boutros Boutros Ghali?
160
00:06:18,316 --> 00:06:20,367
I'm gonna find
this little brat's off-switch.
161
00:06:20,401 --> 00:06:21,434
Jeff!
162
00:06:21,452 --> 00:06:22,936
He's just being protective.
163
00:06:22,954 --> 00:06:24,621
I'll stop him.
164
00:06:24,655 --> 00:06:26,640
I am so excited that
we finally have a model U.N.
165
00:06:26,674 --> 00:06:27,941
here at Greendale.
166
00:06:27,975 --> 00:06:29,676
I am really, really, really,
really, really, really
167
00:06:29,711 --> 00:06:30,944
into model U.N.s.
168
00:06:30,978 --> 00:06:32,813
They used to call me model U.N.
guy back in college.
169
00:06:32,847 --> 00:06:36,116
Well, that's not--
don't research that.
170
00:06:36,434 --> 00:06:38,885
The important thing here
is that I am really--
171
00:06:38,920 --> 00:06:40,721
Pardon me, Professor Cligoris.
172
00:06:41,455 --> 00:06:42,139
Cligoris?
173
00:06:42,173 --> 00:06:44,491
Either pronunciation is fine?
Are you here for the model U.N.?
174
00:06:44,525 --> 00:06:46,860
I'm here to tell you
that the entire idea
175
00:06:46,894 --> 00:06:49,846
to have a model U.N.
was hers.
176
00:06:49,897 --> 00:06:52,632
Really? So you're
Clark M. Eichelburger.
177
00:06:52,667 --> 00:06:55,068
So I've had your photo around my
neck since I was in high school.
178
00:06:55,103 --> 00:06:56,670
I'm talking about
the Greendale model U.N.
179
00:06:57,104 --> 00:07:00,141
My Annie gave
this other Annie the idea
180
00:07:00,175 --> 00:07:02,309
and the diabolical
little b--usybody
181
00:07:02,343 --> 00:07:03,944
stabbed her in the back.
182
00:07:03,978 --> 00:07:05,278
It's childish.
183
00:07:05,313 --> 00:07:07,681
Honestly I'm just happy
there is a model U.N.
184
00:07:07,715 --> 00:07:08,882
Annie, is this true?
185
00:07:09,416 --> 00:07:12,419
I recall other Annie
mentioned the concept,
186
00:07:12,454 --> 00:07:14,320
but she certainly
didn't take the initiative
187
00:07:14,338 --> 00:07:16,356
to find a faculty advisor.
188
00:07:16,391 --> 00:07:17,958
I didn't know that all you had
to do was call dibs.
189
00:07:17,992 --> 00:07:19,126
I'm not calling dibs.
190
00:07:19,160 --> 00:07:20,710
Because I'm not a petty
competitive child
191
00:07:20,762 --> 00:07:22,379
that steals ideas.
192
00:07:22,430 --> 00:07:24,231
I simply refuse to acknowledge
the authority
193
00:07:24,265 --> 00:07:25,999
of your criminal model U.N.
194
00:07:26,033 --> 00:07:27,134
So don't recognize it.
195
00:07:27,168 --> 00:07:28,368
It still exists.
196
00:07:28,403 --> 00:07:30,837
Oh, then Annie'll just
start her own model U.N.
197
00:07:30,855 --> 00:07:32,005
Yeah, for grown-ups.
198
00:07:32,039 --> 00:07:33,373
Well, I still don't
recognize it.
199
00:07:33,408 --> 00:07:34,708
Well, it exists, baby!
200
00:07:34,743 --> 00:07:36,476
I'm sorry, I don't understand
your relationship here.
201
00:07:36,511 --> 00:07:38,111
Is he your father
or your lover?
202
00:07:38,146 --> 00:07:39,396
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
203
00:07:39,447 --> 00:07:40,514
There can only be one
model U.N.
204
00:07:40,548 --> 00:07:41,982
that officially represents
this school
205
00:07:42,016 --> 00:07:43,617
so let's take our foot
off the crazy pedal
206
00:07:43,651 --> 00:07:44,885
for just a moment here.
207
00:07:44,919 --> 00:07:46,353
There's only one rational way
to settle this.
208
00:07:46,388 --> 00:07:49,623
A head-to-head model U.N.
Battle Royale,
209
00:07:49,797 --> 00:07:54,928
the rules to which I would have
to spend the evening devising.
210
00:07:54,962 --> 00:07:56,230
We'll have the competition
tomorrow
211
00:07:56,264 --> 00:07:58,098
in the cafeteria
at 7:00 P.M.
212
00:07:58,132 --> 00:08:00,634
May the most United Nations win.
213
00:08:00,668 --> 00:08:02,135
- Fair enough.
- Totally fair.
214
00:08:02,170 --> 00:08:04,871
I'll see you in the fair papers,
other Annie.
215
00:08:04,889 --> 00:08:07,390
Oh, and you were asking
what our relationship is?
216
00:08:07,425 --> 00:08:08,592
- We're friends.
- Yeah.
217
00:08:08,643 --> 00:08:09,976
- Good friends.
- Grown-up friends.
218
00:08:10,011 --> 00:08:10,977
- Yeah.
- So.
219
00:08:15,216 --> 00:08:16,249
We're friendly.
220
00:08:20,432 --> 00:08:22,668
So, the key to winning this thing is
221
00:08:22,788 --> 00:08:24,489
when in doubt,
agree with Annie.
222
00:08:24,523 --> 00:08:25,523
That's sweet, Jeff.
223
00:08:25,558 --> 00:08:26,975
But everyone should
just have fun.
224
00:08:27,026 --> 00:08:28,660
Then again, what's more fun
than winning?
225
00:08:32,013 --> 00:08:32,225
Pierce.
226
00:08:32,231 --> 00:08:33,932
I'm offended you would
single me out.
227
00:08:33,966 --> 00:08:35,433
Did you read up on
your country's info-packet?
228
00:08:35,468 --> 00:08:36,501
Yes.
229
00:08:36,535 --> 00:08:38,670
Somalia has 1,900 miles
of coastline,
230
00:08:38,704 --> 00:08:39,805
a government that
knows its place,
231
00:08:39,839 --> 00:08:42,040
and all the guns and wives
you can afford to buy.
232
00:08:42,074 --> 00:08:44,175
Why have I never heard
of this paradise before?
233
00:08:44,210 --> 00:08:45,443
I studied up on my country.
234
00:08:45,478 --> 00:08:48,013
Is it okay if
we do accents, sugar?
235
00:08:48,047 --> 00:08:50,515
Troy, Georgia the country,
not the state.
236
00:08:50,549 --> 00:08:52,450
That's right.
Capital city Tbilisi,
237
00:08:52,468 --> 00:08:54,119
and former member
of the Soviet Union.
238
00:08:54,353 --> 00:08:57,022
And we kindly request y'all
mind your Ps and Qs.
239
00:08:57,056 --> 00:08:59,107
Welcome to the world's
first ever model U.N.-off.
240
00:09:00,426 --> 00:09:02,627
You will each be scored
on your U.N.'s ability
241
00:09:02,662 --> 00:09:08,166
to pass resolutions, follow
procedure, and maintain order.
242
00:09:08,200 --> 00:09:11,770
The end goal, of course,
total world peace.
243
00:09:11,804 --> 00:09:13,204
Any questions?
244
00:09:13,239 --> 00:09:14,973
Does two U.N.s mean
there are two earths?
245
00:09:15,007 --> 00:09:17,475
Uh, yeah.
Sure, two earths.
246
00:09:17,510 --> 00:09:19,010
Parallel earths
in different galaxies
247
00:09:19,045 --> 00:09:20,712
or identical earths
in parallel dimensions?
248
00:09:20,946 --> 00:09:21,813
The latter one.
249
00:09:21,847 --> 00:09:22,997
Well, what does that say
about free will?
250
00:09:23,032 --> 00:09:24,015
Abed! Professor--
251
00:09:24,050 --> 00:09:25,150
Right, yeah, let's begin.
252
00:09:25,184 --> 00:09:26,534
Ready, set,
253
00:09:26,585 --> 00:09:27,552
peace.
254
00:09:28,186 --> 00:09:28,920
Crisis alert.
255
00:09:28,954 --> 00:09:31,656
A civil war has broken out
in Ethiopia.
256
00:09:31,691 --> 00:09:34,126
Rebel forces have seized
the grain supply,
257
00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:36,261
creating
a humanitarian disaster.
258
00:09:36,295 --> 00:09:37,996
Okay, cool heads, everyone.
259
00:09:38,230 --> 00:09:40,832
America proposes a U.N.
peacekeeping force of
260
00:09:40,866 --> 00:09:41,866
10,000 troops.
261
00:09:41,901 --> 00:09:42,867
Uruguay agrees.
262
00:09:42,902 --> 00:09:44,169
Ooh, uh, China, too.
263
00:09:44,203 --> 00:09:47,205
Georgia--the country--
is much obliged.
264
00:09:47,239 --> 00:09:49,174
There's gonna be refugees.
Who can take refugees?
265
00:09:49,208 --> 00:09:50,675
The great country of Somalia.
266
00:09:50,710 --> 00:09:52,777
This gem,
this Shangri-La
267
00:09:52,812 --> 00:09:55,213
graciously invites
the Ethiopian refugees
268
00:09:55,247 --> 00:09:58,616
to enjoy safe lodging
and cool ocean breezes
269
00:09:58,651 --> 00:10:00,051
on its sand-swept beaches.
270
00:10:00,086 --> 00:10:01,236
Okay, we're rolling.
271
00:10:01,287 --> 00:10:02,237
Switzerland proposes
a peace summit.
272
00:10:02,288 --> 00:10:03,688
Good idea, Switzerland.
273
00:10:03,723 --> 00:10:05,189
And maybe at the peace summit
we can discuss the possibility
274
00:10:05,207 --> 00:10:06,524
of opening a portal
to Earth II.
275
00:10:06,542 --> 00:10:08,326
Can we put a pin
in that, Switzerland?
276
00:10:08,360 --> 00:10:09,761
Earth II is out there,
can't ignore it forever.
277
00:10:09,795 --> 00:10:11,896
Ooh, China has money.
Does anybody want some?
278
00:10:11,931 --> 00:10:14,532
Yes! The United States
proposes using China's money
279
00:10:14,567 --> 00:10:16,217
to fund agricultural programs
280
00:10:16,252 --> 00:10:18,404
to support Ethiopia's
sustainable farms.
281
00:10:18,438 --> 00:10:21,639
Which should promote economic
development and security.
282
00:10:21,674 --> 00:10:23,208
All in favor?
283
00:10:23,942 --> 00:10:24,743
It's unanimous.
284
00:10:24,777 --> 00:10:25,977
Good resolving,
blue U.N.
285
00:10:26,011 --> 00:10:27,479
You really covered
all the bases.
286
00:10:27,513 --> 00:10:29,181
We have a unanimous decision
as well.
287
00:10:29,215 --> 00:10:31,616
Then after one round,
we are tied.
288
00:10:31,650 --> 00:10:35,286
Looks like both U.N.s
are experts at fostering unity.
289
00:10:35,321 --> 00:10:36,621
- Crap.
- Damn it.
290
00:10:36,655 --> 00:10:37,822
Crisis alert. Russia...
291
00:10:37,857 --> 00:10:39,591
This is what the United Nations
292
00:10:39,625 --> 00:10:40,909
is doing to your freedom.
293
00:10:40,943 --> 00:10:44,279
I'm your freedom!
And I'm in a cage.
294
00:10:44,330 --> 00:10:46,164
With the world!
295
00:10:46,198 --> 00:10:47,665
Because of them!
296
00:10:47,700 --> 00:10:49,100
I thought I'd find you here.
297
00:10:49,135 --> 00:10:51,569
What are you gonna do,
lock me up?
298
00:10:51,587 --> 00:10:52,637
Just give me a reason.
299
00:10:52,671 --> 00:10:55,290
I'll give you a reason!
300
00:10:56,375 --> 00:10:57,342
Whoa!
301
00:10:59,512 --> 00:11:01,129
That's it,
you're coming with me.
302
00:11:01,180 --> 00:11:03,748
♪ Hello ♪
303
00:11:03,766 --> 00:11:07,685
♪ is it me you're looking for ♪
304
00:11:07,720 --> 00:11:09,053
He's pulling my cage.
305
00:11:09,087 --> 00:11:11,105
I'm being pulled in my cage
for no reason!
306
00:11:11,140 --> 00:11:12,357
Is anybody seeing this?
307
00:11:12,391 --> 00:11:14,859
Is the world seeing this?
Are we facebooking this?
308
00:11:14,894 --> 00:11:17,695
Crisis alert!
A tsunami has hit Vietnam.
309
00:11:17,730 --> 00:11:19,798
Massive--crisis alert,
famine in Ghana--
310
00:11:19,832 --> 00:11:22,600
crisis alert--tuberculosis
outbreak--crisis alert!
311
00:11:22,651 --> 00:11:24,319
Humanitarian aid.
We further resolve--
312
00:11:24,370 --> 00:11:25,837
- Disarmament treaty.
- Crisis alert!
313
00:11:25,871 --> 00:11:27,238
To help women and children
get through famines.
314
00:11:27,272 --> 00:11:28,272
Save the orphans.
315
00:11:28,290 --> 00:11:29,290
Loose nukes--
316
00:11:29,325 --> 00:11:30,608
sinkhole--
North Korea--
317
00:11:30,626 --> 00:11:32,327
the prime minister in exile!
Military coup!
318
00:11:32,378 --> 00:11:35,330
The tropical paradise
of Somalia graciously yields.
319
00:11:35,381 --> 00:11:36,664
- China will pay.
- Gooder than grits.
320
00:11:36,715 --> 00:11:38,049
Switzerland is very concerned
about Earth II.
321
00:11:38,083 --> 00:11:39,116
Uruguay agrees.
322
00:11:39,134 --> 00:11:40,251
Uruguay sounds
like "you're a gay."
323
00:11:40,285 --> 00:11:41,786
Backyard barbecue!
324
00:11:41,821 --> 00:11:43,121
Uruguay kindly requests that
325
00:11:43,155 --> 00:11:45,473
Somalia stop pronouncing it
"you're a gay."
326
00:11:45,508 --> 00:11:47,091
- Hereditary monarchy!
- Resolved.
327
00:11:47,125 --> 00:11:49,060
- Graft and corruption.
- Resolved.
328
00:11:49,094 --> 00:11:50,178
Crisis alert!
329
00:11:50,229 --> 00:11:51,179
Resolved.
330
00:11:51,230 --> 00:11:52,664
Looking good, blue U.N.
331
00:11:52,698 --> 00:11:54,699
Getting very close
to world peace.
332
00:11:54,733 --> 00:11:56,835
That's my girl.
You are kicking ass.
333
00:11:56,869 --> 00:11:58,152
All right, guys,
334
00:11:58,187 --> 00:12:00,572
this is the home stretch.
All we gotta do is focus.
335
00:12:00,606 --> 00:12:02,323
Oh! Damn, Pierce.
336
00:12:02,358 --> 00:12:03,641
Ooh, that wasn't me.
337
00:12:03,676 --> 00:12:05,677
I don't smell anything--
whup, I just got it.
338
00:12:05,711 --> 00:12:07,078
Oh, it's in my mouth.
339
00:12:07,112 --> 00:12:08,363
Guys, come on, focus.
340
00:12:08,414 --> 00:12:09,848
Like adults.
341
00:12:09,882 --> 00:12:11,749
We're gonna lose a point
if we don't get through this.
342
00:12:11,784 --> 00:12:13,852
Get through it?
It's almost a solid.
343
00:12:13,886 --> 00:12:15,486
Crisis alert.
344
00:12:15,521 --> 00:12:17,422
A genocidal dictator
in Laos--
345
00:12:17,456 --> 00:12:19,524
Yeah, yeah, we'll get to that.
346
00:12:19,558 --> 00:12:22,010
Okay, so, looking at Turkey,
what can you do?
347
00:12:22,044 --> 00:12:23,895
So let me get this straight.
348
00:12:23,929 --> 00:12:25,597
You're bringing her in here
349
00:12:25,631 --> 00:12:28,099
for "making a mess."
350
00:12:28,133 --> 00:12:29,434
I did more than make a mess.
351
00:12:29,468 --> 00:12:31,402
I turned your whole system
inside out.
352
00:12:31,437 --> 00:12:33,071
And I shut her down.
353
00:12:33,105 --> 00:12:34,439
Young lady, you spilled paint
on a globe.
354
00:12:34,473 --> 00:12:36,407
You're as much a criminal
as this idiot is a cop.
355
00:12:36,442 --> 00:12:37,775
None whatsoever.
356
00:12:37,810 --> 00:12:41,212
Okay, but, um, she's going
to do something illegal.
357
00:12:41,247 --> 00:12:42,247
Aren't you?
358
00:12:42,281 --> 00:12:44,415
Is that true?
Do you, Britta Perry,
359
00:12:44,450 --> 00:12:47,285
have any intentions
of breaking any laws ever?
360
00:12:47,319 --> 00:12:48,786
I-I-
361
00:12:48,821 --> 00:12:50,788
Oh, my God.
362
00:12:50,823 --> 00:12:52,790
No, it's not that simple.
363
00:12:52,825 --> 00:12:54,926
I have a life now.
364
00:12:54,960 --> 00:12:56,361
I have a major and--
365
00:12:56,395 --> 00:12:57,361
Get out please.
366
00:12:57,379 --> 00:12:59,297
I have highlighters.
367
00:12:59,331 --> 00:13:03,701
Get out!
368
00:13:03,736 --> 00:13:06,571
Okay, I know you've got a lot
on your mind right now.
369
00:13:06,605 --> 00:13:09,173
But somebody broke that thing
370
00:13:09,208 --> 00:13:10,775
that comes down
from the parking booth.
371
00:13:10,809 --> 00:13:13,211
You know the thing
that comes down,
372
00:13:13,245 --> 00:13:16,080
keeps the...cars
from coming in.
373
00:13:16,115 --> 00:13:18,583
The thing. It's like a gate,
but it's just a stick.
374
00:13:18,617 --> 00:13:20,885
Comes down, from a hinge.
375
00:13:20,920 --> 00:13:22,520
Keeps the cars out.
376
00:13:22,554 --> 00:13:24,822
Goes up and down 90 degrees.
377
00:13:24,857 --> 00:13:26,457
The arm?
378
00:13:28,994 --> 00:13:32,063
Ooh, point goes to red team.
379
00:13:32,097 --> 00:13:33,331
How is this still happening?
380
00:13:33,365 --> 00:13:35,733
I can't remember what
regular air smells like.
381
00:13:35,768 --> 00:13:38,169
Do something or
we're gonna lose.
382
00:13:38,203 --> 00:13:42,307
Guys, this is important
to Annie.
383
00:13:42,341 --> 00:13:44,475
So whoever actually died
a few months ago, 'fess up
384
00:13:44,510 --> 00:13:45,677
so we can put a stake
through your heart.
385
00:13:46,845 --> 00:13:47,812
Jeff!
386
00:13:47,846 --> 00:13:48,913
Annie, I think
the real lesson here is
387
00:13:48,931 --> 00:13:50,448
that a model U.N.,
much like the real U.N.,
388
00:13:50,482 --> 00:13:52,433
quickly falls apart
when faced with actual--
389
00:13:52,468 --> 00:13:55,787
Noooooo!
390
00:13:55,821 --> 00:14:00,692
I think the lesson here
is that I need to win this!
391
00:14:00,726 --> 00:14:02,977
I want to win!
392
00:14:03,028 --> 00:14:04,145
And you!
393
00:14:04,196 --> 00:14:08,616
You suck!
You're a stupid, ugly poopface!
394
00:14:08,651 --> 00:14:11,135
I'm better than you!
395
00:14:11,170 --> 00:14:12,603
Annie, stop.
396
00:14:12,621 --> 00:14:14,105
You're acting
like a little schoolgirl
397
00:14:14,139 --> 00:14:15,373
and not in a hot way.
398
00:14:24,149 --> 00:14:26,167
Okay.
399
00:14:26,218 --> 00:14:28,219
Uh, that made me sound creepy.
400
00:14:28,253 --> 00:14:30,338
But--but here's the thing.
401
00:14:42,348 --> 00:14:45,484
Don't look at me.
402
00:14:45,654 --> 00:14:48,790
If embarrassment were
bountiful zinc deposits,
403
00:14:48,800 --> 00:14:49,600
I'd be Zambia.
404
00:14:49,920 --> 00:14:53,756
There's nothing
to be Zambia about, Annie.
405
00:14:53,766 --> 00:14:55,441
This is all my fault.
406
00:14:55,476 --> 00:14:57,460
I pushed you into competing
with other Annie.
407
00:14:57,478 --> 00:14:58,661
Are you kidding me?
408
00:14:58,696 --> 00:15:01,130
I practically ran to you
with that flier.
409
00:15:01,165 --> 00:15:03,066
I wanted to destroy her.
410
00:15:03,100 --> 00:15:04,534
All because I can't handle
the thought
411
00:15:04,568 --> 00:15:06,519
of anyone getting
more gold stars than me.
412
00:15:06,570 --> 00:15:08,638
I'm such a child.
413
00:15:08,672 --> 00:15:10,974
You're not.
414
00:15:11,008 --> 00:15:13,476
Listen, when you really
hate someone
415
00:15:13,510 --> 00:15:15,411
the way you hate Annie Kim,
416
00:15:15,446 --> 00:15:19,082
or when you feel
the way I feel about you,
417
00:15:19,116 --> 00:15:23,369
the easy loophole through
the creepiness and danger
418
00:15:23,420 --> 00:15:24,704
is to treat them like a child.
419
00:15:24,755 --> 00:15:26,873
"A chip off the old block,
you're the best, kiddo."
420
00:15:26,924 --> 00:15:28,291
It's a crutch.
421
00:15:28,325 --> 00:15:31,878
It's a way for me to tell you
how important you are
422
00:15:31,929 --> 00:15:33,763
from a distance.
423
00:15:33,797 --> 00:15:36,566
But now you're becoming this...
424
00:15:36,600 --> 00:15:39,068
mature, self-possessed,
intelligent young woman,
425
00:15:39,103 --> 00:15:40,937
and I can't keep
patting you on the head
426
00:15:40,971 --> 00:15:42,004
or talking down to you.
427
00:15:42,022 --> 00:15:44,607
But I like how close we are.
428
00:15:44,642 --> 00:15:47,210
I don't want to grow up if
it means losing what we have.
429
00:15:47,244 --> 00:15:48,645
Well, tough, Annie.
430
00:15:48,679 --> 00:15:51,614
You have to grow up because the
world needs more women like you.
431
00:15:51,649 --> 00:15:54,884
Can't keep doing
this forever, kiddo.
432
00:15:54,918 --> 00:15:58,054
Can't we?
433
00:16:02,893 --> 00:16:04,043
- Nope. I can't, no.
- Nope, that's gross.
434
00:16:04,078 --> 00:16:06,746
That feels gross.
435
00:16:06,797 --> 00:16:09,132
Well, I better go
check on the group.
436
00:16:09,166 --> 00:16:10,383
If they haven't left already.
437
00:16:10,417 --> 00:16:11,434
I'll follow you.
438
00:16:11,468 --> 00:16:13,219
From a respectable distance.
439
00:16:17,474 --> 00:16:19,175
Guys?
440
00:16:19,209 --> 00:16:21,210
I'm sorry I put you
through that.
441
00:16:21,245 --> 00:16:22,779
And I know it doesn't make up
for what happened,
442
00:16:22,813 --> 00:16:25,982
but would it help if I said
443
00:16:26,016 --> 00:16:28,117
I farted?
444
00:16:28,152 --> 00:16:30,219
Annie, no.
445
00:16:30,254 --> 00:16:32,355
I can't let you fall
on that sword because...
446
00:16:32,389 --> 00:16:33,990
I farted.
447
00:16:34,024 --> 00:16:35,408
No, I farted.
448
00:16:35,442 --> 00:16:36,826
I farted.
449
00:16:36,860 --> 00:16:38,428
Guys, I wasn't doing
the Spartacus thing.
450
00:16:38,462 --> 00:16:39,429
I farted.
451
00:16:39,463 --> 00:16:40,430
No, seriously, I--
452
00:16:40,464 --> 00:16:41,464
We all farted.
453
00:16:41,498 --> 00:16:44,634
Oh, you guys!
454
00:16:44,668 --> 00:16:46,169
- Annie...
- I'm farting now.
455
00:16:46,203 --> 00:16:47,570
Wait, why are you still here?
456
00:16:47,588 --> 00:16:49,672
Abed may have figured out
a way we can still win.
457
00:16:49,707 --> 00:16:50,840
Really? How?
458
00:16:50,874 --> 00:16:52,258
It's simple, really.
First we...
459
00:16:55,462 --> 00:16:56,462
Abed, what did I tell you?
460
00:16:56,513 --> 00:16:57,480
You can't just mumble nonsense.
461
00:16:57,514 --> 00:16:58,648
No one's cutting away.
462
00:16:58,682 --> 00:17:00,917
Okay, fine,
here's my actual plan.
463
00:17:19,069 --> 00:17:20,036
What is that?
464
00:17:20,070 --> 00:17:21,404
It's from Britta.
465
00:17:21,438 --> 00:17:24,940
She's promising to disrupt
the model...U.N.
466
00:17:24,958 --> 00:17:27,343
She says she's gonna cause
a disruption that,
467
00:17:27,377 --> 00:17:29,879
while not completely illegal,
should be a real concern
468
00:17:29,913 --> 00:17:32,482
to campus...Security!
469
00:17:32,516 --> 00:17:34,333
Oh, no.
470
00:17:34,384 --> 00:17:37,487
Maybe we should call
the real cops.
471
00:17:37,521 --> 00:17:39,088
You know, back in the '80s,
472
00:17:39,123 --> 00:17:41,257
I had this real
piece of work protestor,
473
00:17:41,291 --> 00:17:42,859
used to always give me trouble.
474
00:17:42,893 --> 00:17:44,861
You know what happened to her?
475
00:17:44,895 --> 00:17:47,463
She incited a riot
at the W.T.O.
476
00:17:47,498 --> 00:17:50,733
Got choked
until she passed out.
477
00:17:50,768 --> 00:17:55,471
By some real cop
with a real billyclub.
478
00:17:58,108 --> 00:18:02,145
Sometimes I wonder, you know?
479
00:18:02,179 --> 00:18:04,313
Well, what are you waiting for?
480
00:18:04,348 --> 00:18:08,351
Go show that hippie
how the world really works.
481
00:18:10,487 --> 00:18:14,690
Aren't you
forgetting something?
482
00:18:14,725 --> 00:18:17,160
All in favor?
483
00:18:17,194 --> 00:18:18,394
Aye?
484
00:18:18,428 --> 00:18:20,880
Could you morons say aye
any slower? Come on.
485
00:18:32,576 --> 00:18:35,344
- Greetings, people of Earth II.
- What is this?
486
00:18:35,279 --> 00:18:37,647
We represent
the United Nations from Earth I.
487
00:18:37,681 --> 00:18:40,583
Using our Switzerland's
hadron collider
488
00:18:40,617 --> 00:18:42,051
and resources from
every nation,
489
00:18:42,086 --> 00:18:43,886
the people of our planet
have constructed
490
00:18:43,921 --> 00:18:45,822
a trans-dimensional
gateway here.
491
00:18:45,856 --> 00:18:47,140
They can't do this.
492
00:18:47,191 --> 00:18:48,991
The science works out.
493
00:18:49,026 --> 00:18:50,226
Yes.
494
00:18:50,260 --> 00:18:52,462
We come to you with an offer.
495
00:18:52,496 --> 00:18:54,464
We he achieved world peace,
tying our score with yours.
496
00:18:54,498 --> 00:18:56,265
But we are willing
to concede our victory
497
00:18:56,300 --> 00:18:58,568
if you agree conceding yours,
498
00:18:58,602 --> 00:19:02,638
forming one gigantic
United United Nations.
499
00:19:02,673 --> 00:19:03,706
We did it.
500
00:19:03,741 --> 00:19:05,007
You're a fool.
501
00:19:05,042 --> 00:19:08,010
Your ultimatum is itself
a technical act of aggression.
502
00:19:08,045 --> 00:19:10,980
If we simply refuse
to recognize your authority,
503
00:19:11,014 --> 00:19:14,183
we still remain ahead
and you lose.
504
00:19:14,218 --> 00:19:15,685
But you win a simple game.
505
00:19:15,719 --> 00:19:18,821
The larger symbolic victory
will be ours.
506
00:19:18,856 --> 00:19:20,990
Oh la la.
507
00:19:21,024 --> 00:19:22,091
We refuse.
508
00:19:22,126 --> 00:19:23,893
I'll take the real victory.
509
00:19:23,927 --> 00:19:28,364
A logical, effective,
common sense move, Annie Kim.
510
00:19:28,398 --> 00:19:30,867
One which flies in the very face
of the United Nations itself,
511
00:19:30,901 --> 00:19:34,237
a fundamentally symbolic
organization
512
00:19:34,271 --> 00:19:36,706
founded on the principles
of high-minded rhetoric
513
00:19:36,740 --> 00:19:37,707
and empty gestures.
514
00:19:37,741 --> 00:19:39,876
Blue U.N. wins.
515
00:19:48,919 --> 00:19:49,919
What the hell are you doing?
516
00:19:49,953 --> 00:19:51,087
Nothing.
517
00:19:51,121 --> 00:19:54,657
And you can't do anything
to stop me.
518
00:19:54,675 --> 00:19:57,710
Did someone say
"can't do anything"?
519
00:20:02,432 --> 00:20:06,102
♪ Hello ♪
520
00:20:06,136 --> 00:20:09,839
♪ is it me you're looking for ♪
521
00:20:09,873 --> 00:20:14,010
♪ I can see it in your eyes ♪
522
00:20:14,044 --> 00:20:18,014
♪ I can see it in your smile ♪
523
00:20:18,048 --> 00:20:19,749
♪ you're all I've ever wanted ♪
524
00:20:21,235 --> 00:20:26,038
♪ And my arms are open wide ♪
525
00:20:26,073 --> 00:20:29,358
♪ 'cause you know
just what to say ♪
526
00:20:29,393 --> 00:20:31,127
♪ and you know
just what to do ♪
527
00:20:31,361 --> 00:20:34,330
Oh, that's--
that's nice. No?
528
00:20:34,340 --> 00:20:35,965
♪ And I want to tell you
so much ♪
529
00:20:35,999 --> 00:20:38,300
I knew you'd come.
530
00:20:38,318 --> 00:20:41,153
You're so busted.
531
00:20:41,188 --> 00:20:43,982
♪ I love you ♪
532
00:20:49,253 --> 00:20:51,254
Yes.
533
00:21:03,570 --> 00:21:06,018
I told you to stop playing
Operation on me!
534
00:21:06,138 --> 00:21:08,158
I'm not your damn board game!
535
00:21:09,941 --> 00:21:12,659
At least you didn't get
my spare ribs.
536
00:21:12,710 --> 00:21:22,324
Sync & corrected by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com