1 00:00:08,242 --> 00:00:10,178 HEY, YOU GUYS WANT TO SEE SOMETHING FUNNY? 2 00:00:10,211 --> 00:00:12,513 OH, IF THIS IS WHERE YOU LIFT YOUR SHIRT UP 3 00:00:12,546 --> 00:00:15,316 AND MAKE YOUR BELLY BUTTON SING-- NO, THANK YOU. 4 00:00:15,349 --> 00:00:18,452 EVEN BETTER. CHECK OUT THIS VIDEO I MADE OF CHARLIE. 5 00:00:20,488 --> 00:00:22,190 ( upbeat music playing ) 6 00:00:22,223 --> 00:00:24,258 P.J.: Being a baby stinks. 7 00:00:24,292 --> 00:00:27,061 Food's too mushy, gross and too juicy, 8 00:00:27,095 --> 00:00:30,198 and the TV shows they make me watch are insulting. 9 00:00:30,231 --> 00:00:31,565 ( farting ) 10 00:00:31,599 --> 00:00:33,501 Ahh, much better. 11 00:00:33,534 --> 00:00:36,470 Life is good. 12 00:00:36,504 --> 00:00:39,440 P.J., YOU ARE GONNA HAVE TO PUT THAT ONLINE SO GRANDMA CAN SEE IT. 13 00:00:39,473 --> 00:00:41,475 GRANDMA KNOWS HOW TO GO ONLINE? 14 00:00:41,509 --> 00:00:44,145 P.J., YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO PUT THAT ON A D.V.D. SO GRANDMA CAN WATCH IT. 15 00:00:44,178 --> 00:00:46,347 GRANDMA GOT A D.V.D. PLAYER? 16 00:00:46,380 --> 00:00:48,482 OKAY, P.J., YOU'RE JUST GONNA HAVE TO GO OVER TO GRANDMA'S HOUSE 17 00:00:48,516 --> 00:00:50,518 AND ACT IT OUT FOR HER. 18 00:00:52,553 --> 00:00:54,122 ( rock music playing ) 19 00:00:54,155 --> 00:00:55,556 * TODAY'S ALL BURNT TOAST 20 00:00:55,589 --> 00:00:57,258 * RUNNING LATE, AND DAD SAYS * 21 00:00:57,291 --> 00:00:59,527 * HAS ANYBODY SEEN MY LEFT SHOE? * 22 00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:02,096 * I CLOSE MY EYES, TAKE A BITE * 23 00:01:02,130 --> 00:01:03,597 * GRAB A RIDE, LAUGH OUT LOUD * 24 00:01:03,631 --> 00:01:06,500 * THERE IT IS UP ON THE ROOF * 25 00:01:06,534 --> 00:01:09,570 * I'VE BEEN THERE, I'VE SURVIVED * 26 00:01:09,603 --> 00:01:13,174 * SO JUST TAKE MY ADVICE * 27 00:01:13,207 --> 00:01:15,309 * HANG IN THERE, BABY 28 00:01:15,343 --> 00:01:16,877 * THINGS ARE CRAZY 29 00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:19,647 * BUT I KNOW YOUR FUTURE'S BRIGHT * 30 00:01:19,680 --> 00:01:21,582 * HANG IN THERE, BABY 31 00:01:21,615 --> 00:01:23,451 * THERE'S NO MAYBE 32 00:01:23,484 --> 00:01:26,354 * EVERYTHING TURNS OUT ALL RIGHT * 33 00:01:26,387 --> 00:01:28,522 * YOUR LIFE IS UP AND DOWN * 34 00:01:28,556 --> 00:01:32,226 * BUT TRUST ME, IT COMES BACK AROUND * 35 00:01:32,260 --> 00:01:36,330 * YOU'RE GONNA LOVE WHO YOU TURN OUT TO BE * 36 00:01:37,498 --> 00:01:40,368 * HANG IN THERE, BABY. 37 00:01:50,178 --> 00:01:53,281 OKAY, WHERE IS THE LIBRARY? 38 00:01:53,314 --> 00:01:58,152 DONDE ESTA LA LIBRARIA? 39 00:01:58,186 --> 00:02:00,654 ( laughs ) 40 00:02:00,688 --> 00:02:02,656 OKAY, YOU'RE REALLY CUTE WHEN YOU ROLL YOUR Rs, 41 00:02:02,690 --> 00:02:05,159 BUT IT'S "BIBLIOTECA." 42 00:02:05,193 --> 00:02:07,561 - BIBLIOTECA. - BUT SAY "LIBRARIA" AGAIN. 43 00:02:07,595 --> 00:02:10,331 LIBRARIA. 44 00:02:11,732 --> 00:02:16,504 YOUR RRRs MAKE ME ALL MMM. 45 00:02:16,537 --> 00:02:18,606 HEY, LISTEN, I WANT TO ASK YOU SOMETHING. 46 00:02:18,639 --> 00:02:20,374 OOH, THAT SOUNDS INTERESTING. WHAT IS IT? 47 00:02:20,408 --> 00:02:21,675 WELL... 48 00:02:25,446 --> 00:02:27,681 ( game playing ) 49 00:02:29,750 --> 00:02:31,919 GABE, DO YOU MIND? 50 00:02:31,952 --> 00:02:33,721 NO, YOU CAN STAY. 51 00:02:35,656 --> 00:02:37,625 LET'S GO UPSTAIRS. 52 00:02:37,658 --> 00:02:39,627 GOOD IDEA. I WAS GONNA SAY SOMETHING, 53 00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:41,662 BUT I DIDN'T WANT TO BE RUDE. 54 00:02:45,666 --> 00:02:48,502 OKAY, NOW WHAT DID YOU WANT TO ASK ME? 55 00:02:48,536 --> 00:02:50,238 I WAS WONDERING IF-- 56 00:02:50,271 --> 00:02:53,507 - IT WAS EMBARRASSING. - IT WAS A SIMPLE QUESTION. 57 00:02:53,541 --> 00:02:56,244 YOUR FATHER SHOUTS AT ME FROM TWO AISLES AWAY, 58 00:02:56,277 --> 00:02:58,479 "HEY, AMES, WHAT KIND OF TOILET PAPER YOU LIKE-- 59 00:02:58,512 --> 00:03:00,514 QUILTED OR SUPER-QUILTED?" 60 00:03:01,582 --> 00:03:03,617 HEY, LOOK, SPENCER'S HERE. 61 00:03:05,253 --> 00:03:07,288 SO WHAT, THE WORLD DOESN'T KNOW 62 00:03:07,321 --> 00:03:10,491 THAT THE GREAT AMY DUNCAN USES TOILET PAPER? 63 00:03:10,524 --> 00:03:12,960 NICE TO SEE YOU, MR. AND MRS. DUNCAN. 64 00:03:12,993 --> 00:03:16,730 AFTER ALL THAT SHOUTING, YOU GOT THE WRONG KIND. 65 00:03:16,764 --> 00:03:20,801 WELL, THAT'S BECAUSE I'M NOT BOB THE TOILET PAPER PSYCHIC. 66 00:03:21,802 --> 00:03:24,738 RIGHT THIS WAY. 67 00:03:24,772 --> 00:03:26,740 WELL, ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, 68 00:03:26,774 --> 00:03:30,644 YOU GOT THE WRONG TRASH BAGS TOO. 69 00:03:30,678 --> 00:03:32,380 SORRY ABOUT MY PARENTS. 70 00:03:32,413 --> 00:03:35,583 WOW, I SAY THAT A LOT. 71 00:03:35,616 --> 00:03:37,685 SO WHAT I WANTED TO ASK YOU WAS-- 72 00:03:37,718 --> 00:03:40,688 I'M GONNA GET YOU! I'M GONNA GET YOU! 73 00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:43,357 YES, I AM. YES, I AM. 74 00:03:43,391 --> 00:03:44,792 YES, I AM. 75 00:03:44,825 --> 00:03:46,794 ( giggling ) 76 00:03:46,827 --> 00:03:48,796 OKAY, LET'S GO OUTSIDE. 77 00:03:48,829 --> 00:03:51,365 IT USUALLY TAKES HIM A WHILE TO GET HER. 78 00:03:55,736 --> 00:03:57,738 OKAY, I THINK I'M ALL OUT OF FAMILY MEMBERS, 79 00:03:57,771 --> 00:03:59,373 BUT YOU'D BETTER TALK FAST. 80 00:03:59,407 --> 00:04:01,375 OKAY, I WAS WONDERING 81 00:04:01,409 --> 00:04:03,344 IF YOU WOULD WEAR MY FOOTBALL JERSEY ON FRIDAY. 82 00:04:03,377 --> 00:04:05,713 IT'S SORT OF A TRADITION THAT THE PLAYERS' GIRLFRIENDS 83 00:04:05,746 --> 00:04:07,715 WEAR THEIR JERSEYS ON GAME DAY. 84 00:04:07,748 --> 00:04:10,818 SO THAT WOULD MAKE ME 85 00:04:10,851 --> 00:04:13,354 YOUR GIRLFRIEND? 86 00:04:13,387 --> 00:04:15,356 - YEAH. - COOL. 87 00:04:15,389 --> 00:04:17,591 BECAUSE I WASN'T EXACTLY SURE OF OUR STATUS 88 00:04:17,625 --> 00:04:20,294 AND I WAS TOO NERVOUS TO ASK. AND I DIDN'T WANT TO BE ONE OF THOSE GIRLS 89 00:04:20,328 --> 00:04:21,762 THAT MADE YOU TALK ABOUT IT. BUT THEN AGAIN-- 90 00:04:21,795 --> 00:04:24,498 SO THAT'S A YES ON THE JERSEY? 91 00:04:25,666 --> 00:04:27,868 OF COURSE IT'S A YES, BOYFRIEND. 92 00:04:32,340 --> 00:04:34,575 BACK TO THE STORE, 93 00:04:34,608 --> 00:04:37,745 WHERE THE CORRECT ANSWER WAS SUPER-QUILTED! 94 00:04:48,389 --> 00:04:51,592 WHOA, THIS IS AMAZING. THAT CHARLIE VIDEO HAS GONE VIRAL. 95 00:04:51,625 --> 00:04:53,361 WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? 96 00:04:53,394 --> 00:04:56,497 THAT IT'S GOTTEN A MILLION HITS SINCE LAST TUESDAY. 97 00:04:56,530 --> 00:04:58,499 AND NOW I'LL ANSWER YOUR NEXT QUESTION. 98 00:04:58,532 --> 00:05:00,768 THAT MEANS OVER A MILLION PEOPLE HAVE SEEN IT. 99 00:05:00,801 --> 00:05:05,373 SO WHAT, YOU PUT THAT ON THE FACETUBE? 100 00:05:07,841 --> 00:05:11,545 YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT, DAD-- THE FACETUBE. 101 00:05:13,447 --> 00:05:16,550 I'M GONNA BE ON TV. 102 00:05:16,584 --> 00:05:18,819 - WHAT? - THE CHANNEL 8 NEWS JUST CALLED 103 00:05:18,852 --> 00:05:21,422 AND NOW THAT THIS VIDEO IS ALL OVER THE INTERNET, 104 00:05:21,455 --> 00:05:25,593 THEY WANT TO DO AN EXCLUSIVE ON THE "FARTY CHARLIE" FAMILY. 105 00:05:25,626 --> 00:05:27,795 SO WE'RE ALL GONNA BE ON TV. 106 00:05:27,828 --> 00:05:29,363 THAT'S WHAT I MEANT. 107 00:05:35,769 --> 00:05:37,738 AND THIS IS OUR FAMILY ROOM. 108 00:05:37,771 --> 00:05:38,839 YOUR FAMILY WHAT? 109 00:05:38,872 --> 00:05:41,442 OUR FAMILY RRROOM. 110 00:05:43,411 --> 00:05:45,413 OH, IT'S SO NICE AND PEACEFUL HERE. 111 00:05:45,446 --> 00:05:47,915 WELL, IT'S A BIG HOUSE AND IT'S JUST ME, MOM AND DAD. 112 00:05:47,948 --> 00:05:50,651 OH, HOW WONDERFUL. 113 00:05:51,852 --> 00:05:53,754 MOM, DAD, THIS IS TEDDY. 114 00:05:53,787 --> 00:05:56,457 HI, NICE TO MEET YOU, MR. AND MRS. WALSH. 115 00:05:56,490 --> 00:05:58,926 OH, PLEASE, I'M LINDA. THIS IS PAUL. 116 00:05:58,959 --> 00:06:01,128 SPENCER HAS TOLD US SO MUCH ABOUT YOU. 117 00:06:01,161 --> 00:06:02,696 YOU'RE EVEN PRETTIER THAN HE SAID. 118 00:06:02,730 --> 00:06:04,465 DAD, STOP. 119 00:06:04,498 --> 00:06:06,900 OH, NO, IT'S OKAY. I DON'T MIND BEING PRETTY. 120 00:06:06,934 --> 00:06:08,902 OH, SPENCE, BEFORE I FORGET, 121 00:06:08,936 --> 00:06:11,505 YOUR MOM DID THE CUTEST THING IN THE STORE TODAY. 122 00:06:11,539 --> 00:06:13,941 SHE POINTED OUT AN EGGPLANT IN THE SHAPE OF A HEART 123 00:06:13,974 --> 00:06:16,410 AND SAID IT REMINDED HER OF ME. 124 00:06:16,444 --> 00:06:17,945 WELL, IT DID. 125 00:06:17,978 --> 00:06:21,949 THEY MUST SHOP AT A DIFFERENT STORE THAN MY PARENTS. 126 00:06:21,982 --> 00:06:25,453 WELL, LET ME PUT THESE AWAY AND I'LL FIX YOU KIDS A QUICK SNACK. 127 00:06:27,888 --> 00:06:30,458 OH, THAT'S A BEAUTIFUL GUITAR. 128 00:06:30,491 --> 00:06:33,594 OH, THANK YOU. I PICKED THIS UP ON OUR LAST TRIP TO SPAIN. 129 00:06:33,627 --> 00:06:35,829 DO YOU MIND IF I PLAY? 130 00:06:35,863 --> 00:06:37,665 NO, GO AHEAD. 131 00:06:37,698 --> 00:06:41,569 YEAH, MY BROTHER-- HE PLAYS GUITAR AND HE... 132 00:06:41,602 --> 00:06:44,705 SOUNDS NOTHING LIKE THAT. OH, THAT IS SO PRETTY. 133 00:06:44,738 --> 00:06:47,675 THANK YOU. TEDDY, HAVE A SEAT, RELAX. 134 00:06:47,708 --> 00:06:49,743 OKAY. 135 00:06:52,880 --> 00:06:57,451 OH, MASSAGE CHAIR. 136 00:06:57,485 --> 00:07:00,020 NI-I-I-CE. 137 00:07:01,722 --> 00:07:04,692 SMOKED SALMON AND DILL ON TOAST POINTS. 138 00:07:04,725 --> 00:07:05,859 THAT'S A SNACK? 139 00:07:05,893 --> 00:07:07,795 I DABBLE IN THE CULINARY ARTS. 140 00:07:07,828 --> 00:07:10,631 MM, YOU MORE THAN DABBLE IN THAT. 141 00:07:12,500 --> 00:07:15,936 OH WAIT, CAN I HAVE ONE MORE? 142 00:07:15,969 --> 00:07:18,539 YOU WANT TO START STUDYING? 143 00:07:18,572 --> 00:07:21,475 IN A MI-I-INUTE. 144 00:07:27,615 --> 00:07:29,817 WELL, I'M NOT SURPRISED. ONCE YOU'RE ON TOP, 145 00:07:29,850 --> 00:07:32,720 THEY JUST WANT TO KNOCK YOU DOWN. 146 00:07:32,753 --> 00:07:34,788 WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 147 00:07:34,822 --> 00:07:37,625 LISTEN TO SOME OF THESE COMMENTS ABOUT THE CHARLIE VIDEO. 148 00:07:37,658 --> 00:07:39,960 FRED R5178 SAYS, 149 00:07:39,993 --> 00:07:43,897 "CUTE, BUT YOU GOT LUCKY, ONE-HIT WONDER." 150 00:07:43,931 --> 00:07:47,034 HERE'S ANOTHER ONE-- "YOU'RE A PATHETIC, NO-TALENT LOSER!" 151 00:07:47,067 --> 00:07:50,538 WITH ABOUT 19 EXCLAMATION POINTS. 152 00:07:50,571 --> 00:07:53,941 THAT ONE'S FROM GABE D. 153 00:07:55,643 --> 00:07:57,010 WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE? 154 00:07:57,044 --> 00:07:59,680 THERE'S NO WAY TO KNOW. 155 00:08:04,084 --> 00:08:06,019 GABE HONEY, COME HERE. 156 00:08:06,053 --> 00:08:09,623 I WANT TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING VERY EXCITING FROM MOMMY'S PAST. 157 00:08:09,657 --> 00:08:11,925 TEDDY TOLD ME IF I EVER HEARD THOSE WORDS, 158 00:08:11,959 --> 00:08:13,927 I SHOULD JUST KEEP WALKING. 159 00:08:13,961 --> 00:08:15,696 PARK IT. 160 00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:19,933 NOW IN PREPARATION FOR OUR TELEVISION APPEARANCE 161 00:08:19,967 --> 00:08:21,802 I'M STUDYING SOME OF MY PREVIOUS BROADCAST WORK. 162 00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:23,804 I USED TO BE A REPORTER 163 00:08:23,837 --> 00:08:25,906 FOR THE SOUTHWEST DENVER COMMUNITY COLLEGE 164 00:08:25,939 --> 00:08:28,676 ACTION NEWS TEAM. 165 00:08:28,709 --> 00:08:32,980 WE REACHED DOZENS OF VIEWERS ALL ACROSS THE COUNTRY. 166 00:08:33,013 --> 00:08:36,550 THIS IS ONE OF MY HARDEST-HITTING PIECES. 167 00:08:36,584 --> 00:08:38,686 In my hand I'm holding 168 00:08:38,719 --> 00:08:40,688 something new to our campus-- 169 00:08:40,721 --> 00:08:42,690 a cell phone. 170 00:08:42,723 --> 00:08:44,958 "Cell" is short for "cellular" 171 00:08:44,992 --> 00:08:46,694 Believe it or not, 172 00:08:46,727 --> 00:08:50,130 you can use this phone wherever you go. 173 00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:54,935 I know it sounds crazy, 174 00:08:54,968 --> 00:08:57,104 but as Paula Abdul would say, 175 00:08:57,137 --> 00:09:00,007 "I'm tellin' ya straight up." 176 00:09:04,712 --> 00:09:07,014 IT WAS GOOD. IT WAS REALLY GOOD. 177 00:09:11,819 --> 00:09:14,655 - OH, UNBELIEVABLE. - ARE YOU KIDDING ME? THAT'S THE WORST THROW! 178 00:09:14,688 --> 00:09:16,657 HI. 179 00:09:16,690 --> 00:09:18,726 HEY, TEDDY. HEY, WHAT YOU GOT THERE? 180 00:09:18,759 --> 00:09:20,794 LEFTOVERS FROM SPENCER'S HOUSE. 181 00:09:20,828 --> 00:09:24,865 - ( yelling ) - COME ON! 182 00:09:24,898 --> 00:09:26,867 I CAN'T WATCH THIS. I'M TURNING IT OFF. 183 00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:29,036 NO NO, WAIT WAIT. THE COMMERCIAL WITH THE TALKING FOOT. 184 00:09:29,069 --> 00:09:31,772 Amy: DINNER! 185 00:09:38,646 --> 00:09:41,014 GRAB YOUR BUNS. IT'S SLOPPY JOE NIGHT. 186 00:09:41,048 --> 00:09:43,016 MOM JUST SAID, "GRAB YOUR BUNS." 187 00:09:43,050 --> 00:09:46,954 - TEDDY. - I'M FINE, THANK YOU. 188 00:09:46,987 --> 00:09:50,057 - OOH, WHAT ARE YOU HAVING? - TOAST POINTS WITH SALMON AND DILL. 189 00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:53,861 TOAST POINTS? I SAY WHAT'S-THE-POINTS. 190 00:09:55,663 --> 00:09:57,064 HEY, CHECK OUT CHARLIE. 191 00:09:59,833 --> 00:10:02,069 SHE PUT SLOPPY JOE ON HER FACE 192 00:10:02,102 --> 00:10:05,038 BECAUSE SHE'S A BABY. WHAT'S SO FUNNY? 193 00:10:05,072 --> 00:10:07,741 IT'S NOT JUST FUNNY 'CAUSE SHE'S A BABY. 194 00:10:08,942 --> 00:10:13,046 SEE, THIS WORKS ON ALL AGES. 195 00:10:13,080 --> 00:10:15,649 NOW GABE, YOU KNOW THAT'S NOT RIGHT. 196 00:10:15,683 --> 00:10:17,785 YEAH, IT SHOULD BE MORE LIKE THIS. 197 00:10:17,818 --> 00:10:21,855 OKAY, ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, CUT IT OUT. 198 00:10:21,889 --> 00:10:24,692 NEXT PERSON WHO THROWS SLOPPY JOE-- 199 00:10:27,160 --> 00:10:29,930 GUYS, YOU KNOW, AT SPENCER'S HOUSE 200 00:10:29,963 --> 00:10:32,700 THE FOOD GOES DIRECTLY FROM THEIR PLATES TO THEIR MOUTHS. 201 00:10:32,733 --> 00:10:35,102 HOW IS THAT FUN? 202 00:10:35,135 --> 00:10:37,938 I'LL LET YOU KNOW TOMORROW NIGHT BECAUSE I'M GOING OVER THERE FOR DINNER. 203 00:10:37,971 --> 00:10:41,074 HIS MOM IS MAKING QUAIL. NOT SLOPPY QUAIL-- QUAIL. 204 00:10:41,108 --> 00:10:43,811 YOU CAN'T GO OVER THERE TOMORROW NIGHT. 205 00:10:43,844 --> 00:10:46,013 THE CHANNEL 8 NEWS CREW IS COMING OVER. THEY'RE GONNA INTERVIEW THE WHOLE FAMILY. 206 00:10:46,046 --> 00:10:47,848 YEAH, I THINK I'LL PASS. 207 00:10:47,881 --> 00:10:49,216 WHAT, YOU DON'T WANT TO BE ON TV WITH ME? 208 00:10:49,249 --> 00:10:52,119 - Men: US. - US? 209 00:10:52,152 --> 00:10:55,823 NO, I DON'T WANT TO BE A PART OF THE "FARTY CHARLIE" FAMILY. 210 00:10:55,856 --> 00:10:57,090 IT'S EMBARRASSING. 211 00:10:57,124 --> 00:10:59,092 IT'S EMBARRASSING 212 00:10:59,126 --> 00:11:03,130 OR WE'RE EMBARRASSING? 213 00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:06,266 YES. 214 00:11:07,935 --> 00:11:10,237 - MORE FOR US. - YEP. 215 00:11:17,144 --> 00:11:21,081 NOBODY CALLS P.J. DUNCAN A ONE-HIT WONDER. 216 00:11:22,515 --> 00:11:25,886 BEHOLD "FARTY CHARLIE II." 217 00:11:27,755 --> 00:11:30,023 ( upbeat music playing ) 218 00:11:32,760 --> 00:11:36,263 Hey, I'm Charlie. I'm feeling extra gassy today. 219 00:11:36,296 --> 00:11:38,198 Uh-oh, here comes. 220 00:11:38,231 --> 00:11:39,967 ( farts ) 221 00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:41,902 ( screaming ) 222 00:11:46,807 --> 00:11:48,876 Ahh, that's better. 223 00:11:50,177 --> 00:11:53,914 SO WHAT DO YOU THINK? 224 00:11:53,947 --> 00:11:56,149 WHERE DO I BEGIN? 225 00:11:56,183 --> 00:11:59,152 THAT WASN'T EVEN CHARLIE. THAT WAS A DOLL. 226 00:11:59,186 --> 00:12:02,155 BECAUSE CHARLIE HAD TO TAKE A NAP. 227 00:12:02,189 --> 00:12:05,058 PLUS, YOU CAN ONLY TELL 'CAUSE YOU'RE HER BROTHER. 228 00:12:05,092 --> 00:12:08,161 NO, I COULD TELL BECAUSE HER FOOT WAS FACING THE WRONG DIRECTION. 229 00:12:08,195 --> 00:12:11,164 WELL, DID YOU LIKE ANYTHING ABOUT IT? 230 00:12:11,198 --> 00:12:13,967 WELL, I LIKED-- 231 00:12:14,001 --> 00:12:16,069 NO. 232 00:12:16,103 --> 00:12:19,973 MAN, THE PEOPLE ARE RIGHT. I AM A ONE-HIT WONDER. 233 00:12:20,007 --> 00:12:22,209 LOOK, YOU HAD A GOOD RUN. 234 00:12:22,242 --> 00:12:24,311 30 SECONDS? 235 00:12:24,344 --> 00:12:27,881 LOOK, I'M TRYING TO PUT LIPSTICK ON A PIG HERE. 236 00:12:27,915 --> 00:12:30,050 YOU'RE A FAILURE. 237 00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:31,218 ( laughing ) 238 00:12:31,251 --> 00:12:34,187 LIPSTICK ON A PIG-- THAT'S HILARIOUS. 239 00:12:34,221 --> 00:12:36,356 I JUST GOT AN IDEA FOR MY NEXT FILM. 240 00:12:38,225 --> 00:12:39,993 IF ANYONE NEEDS ME, 241 00:12:40,027 --> 00:12:42,262 I'LL BE AT THE DRUGSTORE, THEN THE ZOO. 242 00:12:46,066 --> 00:12:48,235 ( doorbell rings ) 243 00:12:50,203 --> 00:12:52,139 OH, HONEY, IT'S TEDDY. WHERE'S SPENCE? 244 00:12:52,172 --> 00:12:54,207 OH, HE WON'T BE BACK FOR A COUPLE OF HOURS. 245 00:12:54,241 --> 00:12:56,209 OH, AM I EARLY? 246 00:12:56,243 --> 00:12:58,211 DID I ACCIDENTALLY COME HERE TOO EARLY 247 00:12:58,245 --> 00:13:00,147 BY MISTAKE SOMEHOW? 248 00:13:00,180 --> 00:13:02,549 - IT'S FINE. - BECAUSE I COULD WAIT OUTSIDE. 249 00:13:02,582 --> 00:13:06,253 OH, DON'T BE SILLY. GO ON, HAVE A SEAT. MAKE YOURSELF AT HOME. 250 00:13:06,286 --> 00:13:07,988 OH, DOES THAT ONE VIBRATE TOO? 251 00:13:08,021 --> 00:13:10,323 - NO, JUST THAT ONE. - OH. 252 00:13:10,357 --> 00:13:13,026 WOULD YOU PREFER THAT ONE? 253 00:13:13,060 --> 00:13:15,362 HEY, THERE'S AN IDEA. 254 00:13:18,631 --> 00:13:20,067 ( chair whirring ) 255 00:13:20,100 --> 00:13:22,069 SO HOW ARE YOU, DEAR? 256 00:13:22,102 --> 00:13:24,972 WELL, NOW THAT YOU ASK, 257 00:13:25,005 --> 00:13:27,140 I'M A LITTLE SNACKY. 258 00:13:29,276 --> 00:13:32,012 AHH. 259 00:13:40,020 --> 00:13:44,291 P.J. DUNCAN, DIRECTOR; THIS IS GABE, ENTOURAGE. 260 00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:46,927 HI, I'M RICK COLEMAN, CHANNEL 8 NEWS. 261 00:13:46,960 --> 00:13:49,396 LISTEN, I'VE GOT A LOT OF EXCITING NEW PROJECTS COMING UP, 262 00:13:49,429 --> 00:13:52,265 SO IF YOU COULD MENTION THE WORDS "PIG" OR "LIPSTICK," 263 00:13:52,299 --> 00:13:55,035 YOU MIGHT GET YOURSELF AN EXCLUSIVE. 264 00:13:57,304 --> 00:14:01,008 HI, THIS IS CHARLIE. I'M BOB. 265 00:14:01,041 --> 00:14:02,876 OF "BOB'S BUGS BE GONE." 266 00:14:02,910 --> 00:14:04,211 YEAH. YOU'VE SEEN MY TRUCKS AROUND TOWN? 267 00:14:04,244 --> 00:14:06,079 AND THE BIG BUG ON YOUR SHIRT. 268 00:14:06,113 --> 00:14:09,216 OH, DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE I WAS WEARING THIS. 269 00:14:09,249 --> 00:14:12,285 OR THAT SHE'S WEARING THE EXACT SAME SHIRT. 270 00:14:12,319 --> 00:14:15,322 HEY, WHAT DO YOU KNOW? 271 00:14:18,325 --> 00:14:21,028 HI, EVERYBODY. 272 00:14:21,061 --> 00:14:24,064 I'M AMY, CHARLIE'S MOM 273 00:14:24,097 --> 00:14:28,068 AND FORMER ANCHOR FOR "GOOD MORNING CAMPUS TODAY." 274 00:14:28,101 --> 00:14:30,070 LISTEN, IF YOU RUN INTO ANY PROBLEMS 275 00:14:30,103 --> 00:14:32,072 DURING YOUR SEGMENT, JUST THROW IT TO ME. 276 00:14:32,105 --> 00:14:34,341 I'LL BE YOUR GO-TO GAL. 277 00:14:36,343 --> 00:14:38,345 HONEY, HAVE YOU REHEARSED WHAT YOU'RE GONNA SAY ABOUT YOUR BUSINESS? 278 00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:40,213 REHEARSED? I'M JUST GONNA WING IT. 279 00:14:40,247 --> 00:14:42,983 NO NO, BOB, YOU'RE NOT VERY GOOD AT WINGING IT. 280 00:14:43,016 --> 00:14:45,318 REMEMBER YOUR WEDDING VOWS? 281 00:14:45,352 --> 00:14:48,421 "I LIKE HER." 282 00:14:48,455 --> 00:14:51,191 HONEY, I WAS A LITTLE NERVOUS. 283 00:14:51,224 --> 00:14:54,227 AND THAT WAS A LONG TIME AGO. I'M GONNA BE FINE. 284 00:14:54,261 --> 00:14:57,197 HEY, MOM, YOU HAVE SOMETHING ON YOUR FACE. 285 00:14:57,230 --> 00:14:59,099 - OH, WHERE? - EVERYWHERE. 286 00:14:59,132 --> 00:15:01,101 ( laughs ) 287 00:15:01,134 --> 00:15:04,071 HONEY, YOU NEED TO WEAR A LOT OF MAKEUP ON TELEVISION 288 00:15:04,104 --> 00:15:07,007 SO THAT YOU'RE NOT WASHED OUT UNDER ALL THE LIGHTS. 289 00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:10,978 THE KIDS DON'T KNOW THIS BECAUSE THEY'RE NOT IN THE MEDIA ARTS. 290 00:15:11,011 --> 00:15:13,246 I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG IT'S BEEN 291 00:15:13,280 --> 00:15:15,248 SINCE YOU'VE BEEN IN THE MEDIA ARTS, 292 00:15:15,282 --> 00:15:17,384 BUT WITH HI-DEF YOU DON'T NEED A LOT OF LIGHT. 293 00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:21,321 OH, WELL, HOW WILL MY MAKEUP LOOK IN HI-DEF? 294 00:15:21,354 --> 00:15:24,958 SHOULD BE INTERESTING. 295 00:15:24,992 --> 00:15:27,494 OKAY, LET'S DO THIS. 296 00:15:27,527 --> 00:15:29,496 THIS IS RICK COLEMAN, 297 00:15:29,529 --> 00:15:31,965 AND I'M HERE WITH DENVER'S NEWEST CELEBRITY 298 00:15:31,999 --> 00:15:35,268 WHO'S BEEN SEEN BY, WELL, WITH A COMPUTER.YONE 299 00:15:35,302 --> 00:15:37,270 SHE'S CUTE. SHE'S FUNNY. 300 00:15:37,304 --> 00:15:39,439 SHE'S FARTY CHARLIE! 301 00:15:39,472 --> 00:15:41,474 BACK TO YOU, RICK. 302 00:15:47,447 --> 00:15:50,383 AND HERE WE ARE ON OUR FAMILY REUNION LAST SUMMER IN ASPEN. 303 00:15:50,417 --> 00:15:52,052 YOU WERE STAYING IN A LODGE? 304 00:15:52,085 --> 00:15:53,520 NO, THAT'S OUR CABIN. 305 00:15:53,553 --> 00:15:55,455 OUR LODGE IS ON THE OTHER SIDE OF OUR MOUNTAIN. 306 00:15:55,488 --> 00:15:59,259 DAD, STOP. YOU'RE MAKING US SOUND LIKE WE'RE RICH. 307 00:15:59,292 --> 00:16:01,128 WE DON'T HAVE OUR OWN MOUNTAIN. 308 00:16:01,161 --> 00:16:05,298 WE SHARE IT WITH ANOTHER FAMILY. 309 00:16:05,332 --> 00:16:08,501 SPEAKING OF FAMILIES, TEDDY, WHEN ARE WE GONNA GET TO MEET YOURS? 310 00:16:08,535 --> 00:16:11,271 UH, THEY'RE KIND OF BUSY, 311 00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:13,406 SO MAYBE NEXT SUMMER 312 00:16:13,440 --> 00:16:16,343 OR THE ONE AFTER THAT. 313 00:16:16,376 --> 00:16:19,046 OKAY, EVERYONE, I HAVE THE NEWS ON IN THE KITCHEN. 314 00:16:19,079 --> 00:16:20,547 YOU HAVE GOT TO SEE THESE PEOPLE. 315 00:16:20,580 --> 00:16:23,283 And when they saw what great work I was doing 316 00:16:23,316 --> 00:16:26,019 out in the field, they said, 317 00:16:26,053 --> 00:16:29,022 "Hey, we need her on 'Good Morning Campus Today.'" 318 00:16:29,056 --> 00:16:31,291 Rick, you might say 319 00:16:31,324 --> 00:16:33,393 it was an offer I couldn't refuse. 320 00:16:35,462 --> 00:16:37,430 If we could get back to Charlie-- 321 00:16:37,464 --> 00:16:39,432 Why don't we talk to the proud papa? 322 00:16:39,466 --> 00:16:41,468 Whew. 323 00:16:41,501 --> 00:16:45,205 Whoa, look, Dad, through your shirt.ht 324 00:16:47,474 --> 00:16:49,176 Uh... 325 00:16:49,209 --> 00:16:51,044 You know, Rick, 326 00:16:51,078 --> 00:16:52,579 something I find very interesting 327 00:16:52,612 --> 00:16:56,349 is that cell phones have gotten so much smaller. 328 00:16:57,850 --> 00:17:00,287 Back to you, Rick. 329 00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:03,323 So, PJ, you're the director of this little epic. 330 00:17:03,356 --> 00:17:06,059 That's right, Rick-- editor and voice. 331 00:17:06,093 --> 00:17:07,427 I don't know what a producer does, 332 00:17:07,460 --> 00:17:09,496 but I probably did that too. 333 00:17:12,299 --> 00:17:14,167 What are you doing? 334 00:17:14,201 --> 00:17:16,336 Well, you just give it to me and I'll throw it back to you. 335 00:17:16,369 --> 00:17:18,171 No, let go. 336 00:17:18,205 --> 00:17:20,207 At least let me throw it back to Yolanda in the studio. 337 00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:23,343 No, I do that. Back to Yolanda in the studio. 338 00:17:23,376 --> 00:17:25,545 What is wrong with you people? 339 00:17:27,380 --> 00:17:30,483 - ( laughing ) - I THOUGHT YOU'D ENJOY THAT. 340 00:17:30,517 --> 00:17:32,819 YOU HAVE NO IDEA. 341 00:17:32,852 --> 00:17:35,355 WHAT A FAMILY. THE WOMAN-- 342 00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:37,524 SHE LOOKS LIKE A CIRCUS CLOWN. 343 00:17:37,557 --> 00:17:39,326 CLOWNS ARE FUN. 344 00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:41,361 WHAT ABOUT THE BIG SWEATY OAF? HE WAS A PIECE OF WORK. 345 00:17:41,394 --> 00:17:43,496 OAFS ARE FUN. 346 00:17:43,530 --> 00:17:46,299 WHERE DID THEY FIND THESE PEOPLE? 347 00:17:46,333 --> 00:17:49,436 MOM, DAD, STOP, OKAY? THAT'S TEDDY'S FAMILY. 348 00:17:51,304 --> 00:17:53,440 - ( laughing ) - THAT'S A GOOD ONE, SPENCE. 349 00:17:53,473 --> 00:17:56,176 NO, HE'S NOT KIDDING. 350 00:17:56,209 --> 00:17:59,346 OH, BUT TEDDY, YOU'RE NOTHING LIKE THOSE PEOPLE. 351 00:17:59,379 --> 00:18:01,414 YOU'RE SO POISED AND SOPHISTICATED AND-- 352 00:18:01,448 --> 00:18:04,117 ( belches ) 353 00:18:06,486 --> 00:18:07,520 EXCUSE ME? 354 00:18:07,554 --> 00:18:10,423 I SAID... ( belches ) 355 00:18:12,292 --> 00:18:16,196 I CAN DO THAT BECAUSE I'M A DUNCAN. 356 00:18:16,229 --> 00:18:17,497 I'M THE PRODUCT 357 00:18:17,530 --> 00:18:21,534 OF THE SWEATY OAF AND THE CRAZY CLOWN. 358 00:18:21,568 --> 00:18:25,138 OH TEDDY, I'M SORRY. WE DIDN'T KNOW. 359 00:18:25,172 --> 00:18:28,608 OH, NO NO, IT'S OKAY. YESTERDAY I WAS EMBARRASSED BY THEM TOO. 360 00:18:28,641 --> 00:18:31,244 AND I EVEN TOLD THEM THAT. AND THEN I CAME OVER HERE 361 00:18:31,278 --> 00:18:33,246 SO I COULD PRETEND THAT I WAS ONE OF YOU. 362 00:18:33,280 --> 00:18:35,682 BUT I'M NOT. I'M ONE OF THEM. 363 00:18:35,715 --> 00:18:39,386 I SWEAT, I FART AND I BURP. 364 00:18:39,419 --> 00:18:41,454 YOU'RE NOT GONNA DO THAT AGAIN, ARE YOU? 365 00:18:41,488 --> 00:18:44,157 NO. 366 00:18:44,191 --> 00:18:46,493 IN FACT, I SHOULD PROBABLY GET BACK TO MY FAMILY 367 00:18:46,526 --> 00:18:49,329 IN THIS, THEIR DARKEST HOUR. 368 00:18:55,202 --> 00:18:57,704 ( farts ) 369 00:18:57,737 --> 00:19:00,307 - PAUL! - OH, I'M SORRY, DEAR. 370 00:19:00,340 --> 00:19:02,442 I JUST WANTED TO SEE HOW THE OTHER HALF LIVES. 371 00:19:02,475 --> 00:19:04,177 OH. 372 00:19:08,481 --> 00:19:10,483 - ( all laughing ) - Oh, man. 373 00:19:10,517 --> 00:19:13,520 Hey, Charlie, was on the news tonight,e 374 00:19:13,553 --> 00:19:15,622 and now they're on the internet. 375 00:19:15,655 --> 00:19:19,459 That's right-- the Duncans have gone viral. 376 00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:22,395 Oh my gosh I look like a clown. 377 00:19:22,429 --> 00:19:24,564 Well, at least you talked. 378 00:19:24,597 --> 00:19:27,500 And talked and talked... 379 00:19:27,534 --> 00:19:28,935 Hey. 380 00:19:28,968 --> 00:19:30,937 I look cool. 381 00:19:30,970 --> 00:19:32,705 ( laughing ) 382 00:19:32,739 --> 00:19:35,275 See, that's the great thing about this family-- 383 00:19:35,308 --> 00:19:37,277 we can laugh at ourselves. 384 00:19:37,310 --> 00:19:39,279 And hopefully you feel the same way 385 00:19:39,312 --> 00:19:41,281 when you're older and realize 386 00:19:41,314 --> 00:19:44,484 "Everyone in the world has seen me pass gas." 387 00:19:44,517 --> 00:19:46,486 ( doorbell rings ) 388 00:19:46,519 --> 00:19:48,555 I'LL GET IT. 389 00:19:52,659 --> 00:19:54,627 - HI. - HEY. 390 00:19:54,661 --> 00:19:57,564 I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE YOU WERE OKAY. 391 00:20:00,533 --> 00:20:02,269 YEAH, I'M FINE. 392 00:20:02,302 --> 00:20:04,637 I'M SO SORRY ABOUT MY PARENTS. 393 00:20:04,671 --> 00:20:06,639 WOW, IT IS REALLY NICE 394 00:20:06,673 --> 00:20:09,376 TO HEAR THAT COMING OUT OF SOMEBODY ELSE'S MOUTH. 395 00:20:09,409 --> 00:20:12,379 I WAS THINKING MAYBE TOMORROW WE COULD STUDY HERE. 396 00:20:12,412 --> 00:20:13,680 IT'S A LOT MORE FUN THAN MY HOUSE. 397 00:20:13,713 --> 00:20:15,548 REALLY? OR ARE YOU JUST SAYING THAT TO BE NICE? 398 00:20:15,582 --> 00:20:17,550 NO, I MEAN IT. IT'S ALWAYS SO QUIET AT MY HOUSE. 399 00:20:17,584 --> 00:20:19,552 OVER HERE IT'S LOUD AND FUN 400 00:20:19,586 --> 00:20:22,489 AND FULL OF DIFFERENT SMELLS. 401 00:20:25,658 --> 00:20:27,494 OKAY, MY HOUSE IT IS. 402 00:20:27,527 --> 00:20:29,462 ANY CHANCE OF A SLOPPY JOE NIGHT? 403 00:20:29,496 --> 00:20:31,464 OH, IT'LL BE A SLOPPY SOMETHING NIGHT. 404 00:20:31,498 --> 00:20:33,266 I'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW. 405 00:20:33,300 --> 00:20:35,368 OH HEY, HOLD ON A SEC. 406 00:20:37,337 --> 00:20:39,772 Hey, Charlie, this is my boyfriend Spencer. 407 00:20:39,806 --> 00:20:41,408 Hi, Charlie. 408 00:20:41,441 --> 00:20:42,742 Isn't he cute? 409 00:20:42,775 --> 00:20:45,345 I hope someday you find somebody as great as him, 410 00:20:45,378 --> 00:20:47,714 but it might be tough. So good luck, Charlie. 411 00:20:49,582 --> 00:20:51,718 Uh, nuh-uh. 412 00:21:00,627 --> 00:21:03,430 ( playing classical guitar ) 413 00:21:13,873 --> 00:21:15,775 OH, FATHER, THAT WAS LOVELY. 414 00:21:15,808 --> 00:21:18,311 YOUR FINGER-PICKING IS SO DELICATE. 415 00:21:18,345 --> 00:21:20,580 ALMOST AS DELICATE AS THAT POMEGRANATE 416 00:21:20,613 --> 00:21:22,682 THAT YOU'RE PAINTING, DEAR. 417 00:21:22,715 --> 00:21:24,684 ( bell ringing ) 418 00:21:24,717 --> 00:21:26,686 DINNER IN 15 MINUTES. 419 00:21:26,719 --> 00:21:29,789 TONIGHT WE'RE HAVING COQ AU VIN AND WHITE ASPARAGUS. 420 00:21:29,822 --> 00:21:33,860 OH MY, I STILL HAVE ON MY AFTERNOON PEARLS. 421 00:21:35,595 --> 00:21:38,565 MOTHER, THE TABLE IS SET. 422 00:21:38,598 --> 00:21:40,833 HOW ELSE MAY I HELP YOU? 423 00:21:40,867 --> 00:21:46,473 FATHER, THE HORSES HAVE BEEN GROOMED AND FED. 424 00:21:46,506 --> 00:21:48,741 ( farts ) 425 00:21:48,775 --> 00:21:52,645 ( all laughing ) 426 00:21:52,679 --> 00:21:55,915 IT WOULD SEEM OUR CHILD IS FULL OF BEANS. 427 00:21:58,651 --> 00:22:00,720 FATHER, HOW YOU MAKE US TITTER.