1 00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:10,044 HEY, EVERYBODY, I'M HOME. 2 00:00:10,078 --> 00:00:11,445 ( laugh track playing ) 3 00:00:11,479 --> 00:00:13,447 ( sighs ) 4 00:00:13,481 --> 00:00:15,783 - AND I'VE GOT PRESENTS. - YES! WHOO! AWESOME. 5 00:00:15,816 --> 00:00:18,586 - HI, DAD. - DADDY, WE MISSED YOU. 6 00:00:18,619 --> 00:00:20,588 I LOVE YOU, PRESENTS. 7 00:00:20,621 --> 00:00:23,424 I MEAN DAD! 8 00:00:23,457 --> 00:00:25,359 OKAY, SO I'M DOING 9 00:00:25,393 --> 00:00:28,429 AN EXTERMINATION JOB OVER AT LOONY LARRY'S ELECTRONICS. 10 00:00:28,462 --> 00:00:32,200 HE WAS INFESTED WITH TERMITES, RATS AND GREAT DEALS! 11 00:00:32,233 --> 00:00:35,436 Kids: BECAUSE HE'S LOONY! 12 00:00:35,469 --> 00:00:38,839 OKAY, FOR P.J. 13 00:00:38,872 --> 00:00:42,410 - FOR TEDDY. - SMART PHONES, AWESOME! 14 00:00:42,443 --> 00:00:45,313 - THANK YOU SO MUCH. - WHERE'S MY SMART PHONE? 15 00:00:45,346 --> 00:00:48,316 P.J.'S HOLDING IT. YOU'RE GONNA GET IT IN ABOUT FOUR YEARS. 16 00:00:49,517 --> 00:00:53,187 BUT FOR YOU I GOT A REMOTE-CONTROL HELICOPTER! 17 00:00:53,221 --> 00:00:55,489 - THIS IS COOL. - ...THAT WE PUT TOGETHER OURSELVES. 18 00:00:55,523 --> 00:00:58,292 - RUINED IT. - WHAT? 19 00:00:58,326 --> 00:01:00,294 I THOUGHT THIS WOULD BE A FUN FATHER-SON PROJECT. 20 00:01:00,328 --> 00:01:03,531 OKAY, WHY DON'T YOU PUT IT TOGETHER WITH YOUR FATHER 21 00:01:03,564 --> 00:01:06,100 AND GIVE ME A CALL. 22 00:01:06,134 --> 00:01:09,370 AND I EVEN GOT 23 00:01:09,403 --> 00:01:11,539 A LITTLE SOMETHING FOR CHARLIE. 24 00:01:15,343 --> 00:01:17,111 * I'm a happy happy horse 25 00:01:17,145 --> 00:01:18,412 * Happy happy happy horse * 26 00:01:18,446 --> 00:01:20,181 * I'm a happy happy horse 27 00:01:20,214 --> 00:01:22,150 * Happy happy happy horse * 28 00:01:22,183 --> 00:01:24,252 ( whinnies ) 29 00:01:24,285 --> 00:01:26,254 - * I'm a happy happy horse... * - WOW. 30 00:01:26,287 --> 00:01:29,190 - THAT'S GONNA GET OLD. - I THINK IT JUST DID. 31 00:01:31,492 --> 00:01:33,161 ( rock music playing ) 32 00:01:33,194 --> 00:01:34,528 * TODAY'S ALL BURNT TOAST 33 00:01:34,562 --> 00:01:36,197 * RUNNING LATE, AND DAD SAYS * 34 00:01:36,230 --> 00:01:38,632 * HAS ANYBODY SEEN MY LEFT SHOE? * 35 00:01:38,666 --> 00:01:40,534 * I CLOSE MY EYES, TAKE A BITE * 36 00:01:40,568 --> 00:01:42,536 * GRAB A RIDE, LAUGH OUT LOUD * 37 00:01:42,570 --> 00:01:44,438 * THERE IT IS UP ON THE ROOF * 38 00:01:46,174 --> 00:01:49,143 * I'VE BEEN THERE, I'VE SURVIVED * 39 00:01:49,177 --> 00:01:52,413 * SO JUST TAKE MY ADVICE * 40 00:01:52,446 --> 00:01:55,583 * HANG IN THERE, BABY, THINGS ARE CRAZY * 41 00:01:55,616 --> 00:01:58,552 * BUT I KNOW YOUR FUTURE'S BRIGHT * 42 00:01:58,586 --> 00:02:00,588 * HANG IN THERE, BABY 43 00:02:00,621 --> 00:02:02,323 * THERE'S NO MAYBE 44 00:02:02,356 --> 00:02:05,226 * EVERYTHING TURNS OUT ALL RIGHT * 45 00:02:05,259 --> 00:02:07,528 * YOUR LIFE IS UP AND DOWN * 46 00:02:07,561 --> 00:02:11,232 * BUT TRUST ME, IT COMES BACK AROUND * 47 00:02:11,265 --> 00:02:14,602 * YOU'RE GONNA LOVE WHO YOU TURN OUT TO BE * 48 00:02:16,237 --> 00:02:18,639 * HANG IN THERE, BABY. 49 00:02:27,481 --> 00:02:30,551 ( squeals ) SO MUCH.Y NEW PHONE 50 00:02:30,584 --> 00:02:33,954 SEE, IT SURFS THE WEB, IT TAKES VIDEO, PLAYS MUSIC. 51 00:02:33,987 --> 00:02:37,691 WE'RE JUST SO HAPPY TOGETHER. 52 00:02:37,725 --> 00:02:41,329 MAN, THE LAST PRESENT MY DAD GOT FOR ME WAS A BOOK-- 53 00:02:41,362 --> 00:02:43,731 CALLED "FUN WITH SCIENCE." AND GUESS WHAT? 54 00:02:43,764 --> 00:02:45,666 THE TITLE WAS A LIE. 55 00:02:45,699 --> 00:02:47,735 OOOH, HEY, YOU WANT TO CHECK OUT 56 00:02:47,768 --> 00:02:50,338 THE TRAILER FOR THE NEW VAMPIRE MOVIE "DUSK"? 57 00:02:50,371 --> 00:02:52,473 OOOH, YOU KNOW I DO. 58 00:02:52,506 --> 00:02:55,209 - OOOH. - THOSE VAMPIRES ARE SO CUTE. 59 00:02:55,243 --> 00:02:58,979 THERE MUST BE SOMETHING GIVES YOU ROCK-HARD ABS. 60 00:02:59,012 --> 00:03:02,350 OH, HEY, WE SHOULD GO TO THE FIRST SHOW. 61 00:03:02,383 --> 00:03:04,352 WHICH IS... 62 00:03:04,385 --> 00:03:06,987 OH, THURSDAY AT MIDNIGHT. 63 00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:10,291 MY MOM WOULD NEVER ON A SCHOOL NIGHT.TE 64 00:03:10,324 --> 00:03:13,294 JUST DO WHAT I DO-- TELL YOUR MOM HOW COOL SHE IS. 65 00:03:13,327 --> 00:03:15,496 THEN YOU GET WHATEVER YOU WANT. 66 00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:17,698 THAT REALLY WORKS? 67 00:03:17,731 --> 00:03:21,369 HOW DO YOU THINK I CAN'T SIT DOWN IN?KIRT 68 00:03:23,271 --> 00:03:26,774 I DON'T KNOW. A VERY GOOD LIAR. 69 00:03:26,807 --> 00:03:29,677 - THAT SCARF LOOKS REALLY GREAT ON YOU. - DOESN'T IT? 70 00:03:29,710 --> 00:03:31,612 YEAH, I COULD TOTALLY PULL THIS OFF. 71 00:03:42,356 --> 00:03:44,425 I HOPE WE END UP BEING LAB PARTNERS, DUDE. 72 00:03:44,458 --> 00:03:46,460 - I DON'T. - WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN? 73 00:03:46,494 --> 00:03:48,228 DON'T MAKE ME SAY IT. 74 00:03:50,364 --> 00:03:52,566 - OH, YES, I GOT WALTER! - OH, GREAT. 75 00:03:52,600 --> 00:03:54,568 YOU GET THE PRESIDENT OF THE SCIENCE CLUB, 76 00:03:54,602 --> 00:03:57,271 AND I'M STUCK WITH THIS DUMB LUG VAN BRUNDT. 77 00:03:57,305 --> 00:03:59,607 - WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY? - I SAID-- 78 00:03:59,640 --> 00:04:02,810 I'D... I'D LOVE TO GIVE A HUG TO VAN BRUNDT. 79 00:04:02,843 --> 00:04:04,578 DON'T! 80 00:04:04,612 --> 00:04:06,347 OKAY... 81 00:04:06,380 --> 00:04:08,516 LAB PARTNER BUDDY. 82 00:04:08,549 --> 00:04:09,817 MY PHONE NUMBER. 83 00:04:09,850 --> 00:04:12,353 CALL ME WHEN IT'S DONE. 84 00:04:12,386 --> 00:04:14,054 - YOU GOT IT, BIG GUY. - DON'T CALL ME BIG GUY. 85 00:04:14,087 --> 00:04:16,557 VERY SORRY. 86 00:04:19,427 --> 00:04:21,495 HEY, GREAT NEWS-- WE'RE PARTNERS. 87 00:04:21,529 --> 00:04:25,499 YEAH, THERE'S NO NEED FOR US TO GET TOGETHER. 88 00:04:25,533 --> 00:04:28,302 I'LL DO THE PROJECT AND PUT BOTH OF OUR NAMES ON IT. 89 00:04:28,336 --> 00:04:31,539 OH, I LOVE YOU, MAN! 90 00:04:40,080 --> 00:04:42,082 HEY, WHATCHA DOING, MOM? 91 00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:44,652 OH, JUST GOING THROUGH THE SPICES, TOSSING OUT THE OLD ONES. 92 00:04:44,685 --> 00:04:47,287 OH, THAT IS SO COOL. 93 00:04:48,889 --> 00:04:53,093 - IT IS? - WELL, MAYBE IT'S JUST THE WAY YOU DO IT. 94 00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:55,729 WELL, I DO HAVE A SYSTEM. 95 00:04:55,763 --> 00:04:57,831 IT'S ALPHABETICAL. 96 00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:03,504 OKAY, CARDAMOM COMES BEFORE CINNAMON WHICH COMES BEFORE CORIANDER. 97 00:05:03,537 --> 00:05:07,341 WHOA, I COULD LISTEN TO YOU TALK ABOUT SPICES ALL DAY. 98 00:05:07,375 --> 00:05:10,344 - THEN WE GO ONTO DILL... - OKAY. 99 00:05:10,378 --> 00:05:13,347 THEN IT KIND OF JUMPS AROUND TO FENNEL. 100 00:05:13,381 --> 00:05:17,117 BUT INSTEAD, HOW ABOUT WE TALK ABOUT CLOTHES? 101 00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:19,353 LIKE THAT AWESOME NEW TOP YOU'RE WEARING. 102 00:05:19,387 --> 00:05:21,589 YOU LIKE THIS? HONEY, I'VE HAD IT FOREVER. 103 00:05:21,622 --> 00:05:24,592 AND I ESPECIALLY LOVE THAT SPLASH OF COLOR ON YOUR SHOULDER. 104 00:05:24,625 --> 00:05:26,360 WHAT, THAT? 105 00:05:26,394 --> 00:05:28,328 I THINK THAT'S CHARLIE'S PUKE. 106 00:05:29,430 --> 00:05:31,765 LET'S TALK ABOUT YOUR SHOES. 107 00:05:31,799 --> 00:05:34,502 ( phone rings ) 108 00:05:34,535 --> 00:05:37,371 HELLO? OH, HEY, IVY. 109 00:05:37,405 --> 00:05:38,772 YOU WANT ME TO COME OVER? 110 00:05:38,806 --> 00:05:41,442 OH NO, SORRY. I'D RATHER HANG OUT WITH MY MOM. 111 00:05:41,475 --> 00:05:44,545 OKAY, TALK TO YOU LATER. BYE. 112 00:05:46,814 --> 00:05:49,417 ARE YOU SICK? ARE YOU GONNA PUKE ON ME TOO? 113 00:05:51,652 --> 00:05:53,621 UH, NO, WHY? 114 00:05:53,654 --> 00:05:55,523 YOU'D RATHER HANG OUT WITH ME THAN IVY? 115 00:05:55,556 --> 00:05:58,692 MOM, DOES CINNAMON COME BEFORE CORIANDER? 116 00:06:01,562 --> 00:06:04,364 THAT IS THE SWEETEST THING YOU HAVE EVER SAID TO ME. 117 00:06:07,167 --> 00:06:08,769 MY LITTLE WOOSKIE. 118 00:06:11,839 --> 00:06:14,575 ( mechanism winding down ) * I'm a happy happy horse 119 00:06:14,608 --> 00:06:16,677 * Happy happy happy horse * 120 00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:19,713 * Happy happy happy horse... 121 00:06:19,747 --> 00:06:22,516 ( sick-sounding whinny ) 122 00:06:22,550 --> 00:06:25,419 YEAH, SOUNDS LIKE HAPPY HORSE NEEDS SOME NEW BATTERIES. 123 00:06:25,453 --> 00:06:29,557 NO! I CAN'T GET THAT STUPID SONG OUT OF MY HEAD. 124 00:06:30,758 --> 00:06:33,561 ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. YOU KNOW WHAT? 125 00:06:33,594 --> 00:06:36,630 LET'S BUILD US A HELICOPTER. 126 00:06:36,664 --> 00:06:39,867 ( chuckles ) AND THE FUN BEGINS 127 00:06:39,900 --> 00:06:42,202 WITH THE INSTRUCTION MANUAL. 128 00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:43,637 DAD, DO WE HAVE TO? 129 00:06:43,671 --> 00:06:46,574 YES, WE HAVE TO. OH! YOU KNOW WHAT? 130 00:06:46,607 --> 00:06:49,510 WE SHOULD START WITH THE "BEFORE YOU BEGIN" PAMPHLET. 131 00:06:49,543 --> 00:06:52,212 OH, AND THERE'S A DVD! WHICH WE WILL WATCH 132 00:06:52,245 --> 00:06:55,683 AFTER THE PAMPHLET AND THE INSTRUCTION MANUAL. 133 00:06:56,850 --> 00:06:59,520 DAD, HOW LONG IS THIS GONNA TAKE? 134 00:06:59,553 --> 00:07:01,622 OH, NOT LONG. OH, HEY, LOOK AT THIS! 135 00:07:01,655 --> 00:07:04,892 OOOH, A "BEFORE YOU WATCH THE DVD" CARD. 136 00:07:12,500 --> 00:07:14,468 ( squeals ) IF THERE'S ANYTHING BETTER 137 00:07:14,502 --> 00:07:17,671 THAN A HOMEMADE FACIAL WITH MY "BMF," I HAVEN'T HEARD OF IT. 138 00:07:17,705 --> 00:07:20,474 - B.M.F.? - BEST MOM FOREVER. 139 00:07:20,508 --> 00:07:23,811 OH MY GOSH! I WOULD BE SMILING, BUT MY FACE IS GOING TO CRACK. 140 00:07:23,844 --> 00:07:25,746 ( laughing ) 141 00:07:25,779 --> 00:07:27,481 WHAT'S GOING ON? 142 00:07:27,515 --> 00:07:29,483 OH, JUST A COUPLE GIRLFRIENDS HANGING OUT. 143 00:07:29,517 --> 00:07:31,552 WHAT, IS IVY HERE? 144 00:07:31,585 --> 00:07:33,487 NO, I'M TALKING ABOUT ME AND MOM. 145 00:07:33,521 --> 00:07:34,955 WE'VE BEEN HANGING OUT ALL AFTERNOON. 146 00:07:34,988 --> 00:07:37,725 WE WENT TO THE MALL. WE WENT SHOPPING. 147 00:07:37,758 --> 00:07:41,962 - THEN WE DID SOME OTHER STUFF I CAN'T TELL YOU ABOUT. - SHHH. 148 00:07:41,995 --> 00:07:45,733 - YEAH, WELL, I DIDN'T ASK. - THAT'S GOOD 'CAUSE WE'RE NOT GONNA TELL YOU. 149 00:07:45,766 --> 00:07:49,036 YEAH, I'M GONNA BE IN THE OTHER ROOM. 150 00:07:49,069 --> 00:07:52,506 OH, UH, DAD, I ACTUALLY NEED TO ASK YOU GUYS ABOUT SOMETHING. 151 00:07:52,540 --> 00:07:56,009 IS IT OKAY IF IVY AND I GO TO A MIDNIGHT MOVIE ON THURSDAY? 152 00:07:56,043 --> 00:07:57,878 THURSDAY? NO WAY, IT'S A SCHOOL NIGHT. 153 00:08:03,584 --> 00:08:05,786 BOB, HONEY, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND, OKAY? 154 00:08:05,819 --> 00:08:08,756 THIS ISN'T JUST ANY MOVIE. THIS IS "DUSK." 155 00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:12,059 - WHAT'S THAT? - HELLO! 156 00:08:12,092 --> 00:08:14,728 THE MOVIE ABOUT THE VAMPIRES. 157 00:08:14,762 --> 00:08:16,597 THE PREQUEL TO "DAWN." 158 00:08:16,630 --> 00:08:18,799 SO LAME! 159 00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:22,302 ALL RIGHT, YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU WANNA LET HER GO, LET HER GO. 160 00:08:22,335 --> 00:08:24,805 - OKAY! THANK YOU, DADDY. THANK YOU, GIRLFRIEND. - TEDDY. 161 00:08:24,838 --> 00:08:26,674 * OOOH! UH UH * 162 00:08:26,707 --> 00:08:28,576 ( kisses ) * CALL ME! 163 00:08:33,914 --> 00:08:35,816 WHAT'S THAT IN YOUR HAIR? 164 00:08:35,849 --> 00:08:37,985 IT'S CALLED GLITTER. GET WITH IT, GRANDPA. 165 00:08:43,323 --> 00:08:45,626 EMMETT! THANK YOU. 166 00:08:45,659 --> 00:08:48,596 I CAN'T BELIEVE I HAVE TO DO THIS WHOLE CHEMISTRY PROJECT BY MYSELF. 167 00:08:48,629 --> 00:08:51,565 - STUPID VAN BRUNDT! - HEY, DON'T CALL HIM STUPID. 168 00:08:51,599 --> 00:08:53,867 THAT'S AN INSULT TO STUPID PEOPLE EVERYWHERE. 169 00:08:55,636 --> 00:08:57,771 THAT IDIOT CAN'T EVEN COUNT TO 10, 170 00:08:57,805 --> 00:09:00,874 WHICH, COINCIDENTALLY, IS THE NUMBER OF YEARS HE'S GOING TO BE IN HIGH SCHOOL. 171 00:09:02,743 --> 00:09:04,612 ( phone chimes ) 172 00:09:04,645 --> 00:09:06,814 GUESS THAT'S MY PHONE. 173 00:09:06,847 --> 00:09:09,917 OH, THAT'S WEIRD. IT SAYS I HAVE A CALL IN PROGRESS. 174 00:09:09,950 --> 00:09:12,586 YOU PROBABLY SAT ON IT AND BUTT-DIALED SOMEONE. 175 00:09:12,620 --> 00:09:14,755 HELLO? NOBODY THERE. 176 00:09:14,788 --> 00:09:16,757 - MUST HAVE GOTTEN VOICEMAIL. - WHO'D YOU DIAL? 177 00:09:16,790 --> 00:09:18,892 VAN BRUNDT. VAN BRUNDT! 178 00:09:18,926 --> 00:09:21,629 HE'S GONNA HEAR EVERYTHING WE JUST SAID ABOUT HIM! 179 00:09:21,662 --> 00:09:24,097 YOU MEAN HE'S GOING TO HEAR EVERYTHING YOU JUST SAID ABOUT HIM. 180 00:09:24,131 --> 00:09:28,335 - WE WERE BOTH TALKING ABOUT HIM, EMMETT. - STOP SAYING MY NAME! 181 00:09:28,368 --> 00:09:30,170 - AND HANG UP THE PHONE! - YES! 182 00:09:36,677 --> 00:09:38,646 - HEY-YYYY! - HEY. 183 00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:42,683 SO DID MY EVIL PLAN WORK? DID YOU BUTTER UP YOUR MOM? 184 00:09:42,716 --> 00:09:45,352 LIKE POPCORN AT A MIDNIGHT MOVIE! 185 00:09:45,385 --> 00:09:47,120 ( squeals ) 186 00:09:47,154 --> 00:09:49,823 - ( phone chimes ) - WHAT WAS THAT? 187 00:09:49,857 --> 00:09:52,860 OH, IT'S JUST MY PHONE. IT'S ALWAYS MAKING WEIRD NOISES. 188 00:09:52,893 --> 00:09:54,928 SO HOW'D YOU DO IT? 189 00:09:54,962 --> 00:09:57,097 OH, IT WAS SO PAINFUL. 190 00:09:57,130 --> 00:10:00,000 I had to spend the whole day with her pretending she was cool. 191 00:10:00,033 --> 00:10:02,636 Longest day of my life. 192 00:10:02,670 --> 00:10:04,104 BUT IT WAS ALL WORTH IT 193 00:10:04,137 --> 00:10:07,140 BECAUSE WE'RE GOING TO SEE "DUSK"! 194 00:10:07,174 --> 00:10:08,876 ( laughter ) 195 00:10:08,909 --> 00:10:11,712 "WHEN THE SUN GOES DOWN, HIS FANGS COME OUT." 196 00:10:11,745 --> 00:10:15,015 - AND HIS SHIRT COMES OFF! - WHOOO! 197 00:10:15,048 --> 00:10:17,050 ( cheering ) 198 00:10:29,930 --> 00:10:34,134 IT WAS ALL JUST A BIG TRICK SO TEDDY COULD GET PERMISSION TO SEE THAT VAMPIRE MOVIE. 199 00:10:34,167 --> 00:10:38,772 BOB, SHE THINKS I'M JUST AS UNCOOL AS I THOUGHT MY MOM WAS. 200 00:10:38,806 --> 00:10:43,076 IT'S THE GREAT UNCOOL CIRCLE OF LIFE. 201 00:10:43,110 --> 00:10:46,079 WELL, HONEY, IF IT HELPS, I THINK YOU'RE COOL. 202 00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:49,116 IT DOESN'T. 203 00:10:50,918 --> 00:10:52,986 ALL RIGHT, SO WHAT'S THE PUNISHMENT GOING TO BE? 204 00:10:53,020 --> 00:10:55,022 NO MOVIE, GROUNDED FOR A WEEK? 205 00:10:55,055 --> 00:10:58,892 HUH-UH. TOO EASY. 206 00:10:58,926 --> 00:11:01,962 MAMA'S GOING TO GET EVEN. 207 00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:03,764 YOU KNOW NOTHING GOOD EVER HAPPENS 208 00:11:03,797 --> 00:11:05,733 WHEN YOU START CALLING YOURSELF "MAMA." 209 00:11:05,766 --> 00:11:08,035 MAMA DOESN'T CARE. 210 00:11:13,140 --> 00:11:15,843 - ( sparking ) - ( grunting ) 211 00:11:18,145 --> 00:11:19,947 THERE HE IS. 212 00:11:19,980 --> 00:11:23,083 GUESS WE SHOULD JUST GO IN THERE AND GET IT OVER WITH. 213 00:11:23,116 --> 00:11:25,485 MAN, I HATE GETTING BEAT UP. 214 00:11:25,518 --> 00:11:29,723 - YOU'VE BEEN BEAT UP BEFORE? - NO, BUT I'VE HEARD BAD THINGS. 215 00:11:29,757 --> 00:11:31,258 HEY, DUNCAN, GET IN HERE! 216 00:11:37,865 --> 00:11:39,733 HOW ARE YOU DOING ON OUR PROJECT? 217 00:11:39,767 --> 00:11:41,869 OKAY. 218 00:11:44,037 --> 00:11:46,807 - THAT'S ALL YOU WANTED TO TALK ABOUT? - OH, I'M SORRY. 219 00:11:46,840 --> 00:11:48,976 I LOVE WHAT YOU'VE DONE WITH YOUR HAIR. 220 00:11:50,878 --> 00:11:55,248 SO... HEARD ANY INTERESTING PHONE MESSAGES LATELY? 221 00:11:55,282 --> 00:11:59,953 NO, MRS. JETER CAUGHT ME TEXTING IN CLASS AND TOOK MY PHONE AWAY. 222 00:11:59,987 --> 00:12:02,155 - OHH. - WHAT?! 223 00:12:02,189 --> 00:12:05,292 THAT-- THAT'S TERRIBLE. DON'T YOU HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE JUST TAKE YOUR PHONE 224 00:12:05,325 --> 00:12:07,861 AND PUT IT-- WHERE EXACTLY? 225 00:12:07,895 --> 00:12:11,765 IT'S IN HER DESK. I'M GETTING IT BACK AT THE END OF THE DAY. 226 00:12:11,799 --> 00:12:13,200 I'M TIRED OF TALKING! 227 00:12:18,538 --> 00:12:20,173 - HEY. - HEY. 228 00:12:20,207 --> 00:12:21,942 AREN'T YOU HOME FROM SCHOOL A LITTLE EARLY? 229 00:12:21,975 --> 00:12:24,211 WE'VE GOT A HELICOPTER TO FLY. 230 00:12:24,244 --> 00:12:26,079 AND I'M ONLY MISSING P.E. 231 00:12:26,113 --> 00:12:29,783 ( softly ) AND ENGLISH AND MATH. 232 00:12:29,817 --> 00:12:31,952 ALL RIGHT, LET'S GET THIS BIRD IN THE AIR. 233 00:12:34,321 --> 00:12:37,290 - WHOA! - HOW'D YOU DO THAT? 234 00:12:37,324 --> 00:12:40,293 - I DON'T KNOW. - IS IT VOICE-ACTIVATED? 235 00:12:40,327 --> 00:12:44,197 UH... STOP. 236 00:12:44,231 --> 00:12:47,067 DOWN! 237 00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:49,903 - NO. - Both: WHOA! 238 00:12:51,371 --> 00:12:53,540 YOU MUST HAVE PUT IT TOGETHER WRONG. 239 00:12:53,573 --> 00:12:56,343 NO NO, THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE. I FOLLOWED ALL THE INSTRUCTIONS. 240 00:12:57,344 --> 00:12:59,913 WHOA! ( screaming ) 241 00:13:02,983 --> 00:13:05,919 - WHERE'S THE REMOTE? - ( sobs ) I DON'T KNOW! 242 00:13:15,162 --> 00:13:17,230 OH, DAD, DO SOMETHING! 243 00:13:17,264 --> 00:13:20,200 I AM-- I'M MAKING A RUN FOR IT! 244 00:13:20,233 --> 00:13:22,802 ( screams, crashes ) 245 00:13:28,408 --> 00:13:30,377 OKAY, THE COAST IS CLEAR. LET'S GO. 246 00:13:30,410 --> 00:13:32,913 JUST GET THE PHONE AND GET OUT OF HERE. 247 00:13:35,916 --> 00:13:37,150 OKAY, I GOT IT. LET'S GO. 248 00:13:37,184 --> 00:13:39,252 - ( voices talking ) - OH. OH JEEZ! 249 00:13:39,286 --> 00:13:41,221 - HERE YOU GO. - WHAT DO YOU MEAN!? 250 00:13:41,254 --> 00:13:43,991 I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. PUT IT AWAY. 251 00:13:46,359 --> 00:13:49,329 - THAT ATTITUDE BETTER CHANGE, BUDDY. - YES, MA'AM. 252 00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:52,365 WHAT ARE YOU BOYS DOING IN HERE? 253 00:13:52,399 --> 00:13:55,202 WE HAD A CHEMISTRY QUESTION. 254 00:13:55,235 --> 00:13:58,205 - WHICH IS? - AHEM, UM... 255 00:13:58,238 --> 00:14:00,207 WE WERE WONDERING... 256 00:14:00,240 --> 00:14:02,609 WHAT'S BORON MADE OF. 257 00:14:02,642 --> 00:14:05,245 BORON. 258 00:14:05,278 --> 00:14:07,214 TOLD YA! 259 00:14:07,247 --> 00:14:09,950 WELL, I STAND CORRECTED. 260 00:14:11,184 --> 00:14:13,153 CAN I HAVE MY PHONE NOW? 261 00:14:15,288 --> 00:14:17,290 HERE YOU GO. 262 00:14:19,259 --> 00:14:21,294 WAIT A MINUTE-- WHERE'S MY PHONE? 263 00:14:23,263 --> 00:14:27,300 UH, GEORGE, CAN I MAKE A QUICK CALL ON YOUR PHONE? 264 00:14:27,334 --> 00:14:29,302 PLEASE? 265 00:14:29,336 --> 00:14:32,906 THANK YOU. OH OH OHHH! 266 00:14:39,346 --> 00:14:42,315 - WHOOPS. - WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU? 267 00:14:42,349 --> 00:14:44,384 UM, I GUESS 268 00:14:44,417 --> 00:14:46,453 I'M THE "BORON" NOW. 269 00:14:46,486 --> 00:14:50,090 - YOU OWE ME A PHONE! - GLADLY. 270 00:14:50,123 --> 00:14:52,259 ( rings ) 271 00:14:52,292 --> 00:14:55,028 - OKAY, P.J., LET'S GO. - WAIT. 272 00:14:55,062 --> 00:14:58,365 IS THAT MY PHONE RINGING IN YOUR PANTS? 273 00:15:04,371 --> 00:15:06,439 HELLO? 274 00:15:06,473 --> 00:15:09,076 HOLD ON. IT'S FOR YOU. 275 00:15:14,181 --> 00:15:17,384 I CAN'T BELIEVE WE'RE HERE! THIS IS LIKE A DREAM. 276 00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:19,486 A DREAM WHERE WE GET TO FLIRT WITH CUTE GUYS, 277 00:15:19,519 --> 00:15:21,488 WATCH A MOVIE ABOUT CUTE GUYS 278 00:15:21,521 --> 00:15:24,124 WHILE SITTING NEXT TO CUTE GUYS. 279 00:15:27,027 --> 00:15:30,964 THE MIDNIGHT SHOWING OF "DUSK" IS SOLD OUT. 280 00:15:30,998 --> 00:15:32,465 ( squealing ) 281 00:15:36,536 --> 00:15:38,105 OH NO. 282 00:15:38,138 --> 00:15:39,739 - WHAT? - LOOK! 283 00:15:39,772 --> 00:15:42,275 ( squeals ) 284 00:15:42,309 --> 00:15:45,112 - HEY, GIRLFRIEND! - HEY HEY. 285 00:15:45,145 --> 00:15:46,513 WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 286 00:15:46,546 --> 00:15:49,149 WHAT AM I DOING? I'M HANGING OUT WITH MY "BFD," 287 00:15:49,182 --> 00:15:51,384 MY BEST FRIEND DAUGHTER. RIGHT? 288 00:15:51,418 --> 00:15:54,321 'CAUSE THAT'S WHAT ALL THE COOL MOMS DO, RIGHT, MARY LOU? 289 00:15:54,354 --> 00:15:56,323 ALL NIGHT LONG! 290 00:15:56,356 --> 00:16:01,528 WHOO, IVY! ISN'T THAT RANDALL, THE BOY YOU THINK IS SOOOO CUTE? 291 00:16:01,561 --> 00:16:04,197 - MOM, KEEP YOUR VOICE DOWN. - HEY, RANDALL, 292 00:16:04,231 --> 00:16:05,465 THIS IS MY DAUGHTER IVY. 293 00:16:05,498 --> 00:16:09,369 SHE'S SINGLE AND LOVES TO MINGLE. 294 00:16:09,402 --> 00:16:11,738 MARY LOU! 295 00:16:11,771 --> 00:16:14,441 YOU'RE SO CUTE. RANDALL CAN'T HEAR YOU. 296 00:16:14,474 --> 00:16:19,412 HEY, EVERYBODY! I'M AMY DUNCAN, TEDDY DUNCAN'S MOM. 297 00:16:19,446 --> 00:16:23,416 AND I'M MARY LOU WENTZ AND THIS IS MY DAUGHTER IVY. 298 00:16:23,450 --> 00:16:26,553 WE'RE THE COOL MOMS. RIGHT, TEDDY? 299 00:16:26,586 --> 00:16:30,357 - HIT IT, MARY LOU. - ( dance music playing ) 300 00:16:41,401 --> 00:16:43,803 - I CAN'T LOOK. - OH, GOOD CHOICE. 301 00:16:43,836 --> 00:16:47,407 BECAUSE RIGHT NOW THEY'RE DOING THE USHER BUMP. 302 00:17:01,388 --> 00:17:05,325 OKAY, YOU DID NOT SAY A WORD THE ENTIRE RIDE HOME. 303 00:17:05,358 --> 00:17:07,460 OUT WITH IT. 304 00:17:09,362 --> 00:17:11,198 YOU TOTALLY EMBARRASSED ME TONIGHT. 305 00:17:11,231 --> 00:17:13,600 YEAH, THAT WAS KIND OF THE IDEA. 306 00:17:14,601 --> 00:17:18,271 LOOK AT ME. 307 00:17:18,305 --> 00:17:20,507 WHY? WHAT DID I EVER DO TO YOU? 308 00:17:20,540 --> 00:17:22,575 SHH. 309 00:17:22,609 --> 00:17:26,079 YOU PLAYED ME, TEDDY. YOU DON'T THINK I'M COOL AT ALL. 310 00:17:26,113 --> 00:17:27,480 WHY-- WHY WOULD YOU THINK THAT? 311 00:17:27,514 --> 00:17:29,482 ( chuckles ) BECAUSE I HEARD YOU SAY IT. 312 00:17:29,516 --> 00:17:32,385 - WHEN YOU BUTT-DIALED ME. - I-- 313 00:17:33,486 --> 00:17:35,455 OHHH. 314 00:17:37,557 --> 00:17:40,160 YEAH, "OHHH." 315 00:17:46,666 --> 00:17:48,568 I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY, MOM. 316 00:17:51,404 --> 00:17:53,406 I'M SORRY. 317 00:17:55,142 --> 00:17:57,377 THAT'S A START. 318 00:17:57,410 --> 00:18:00,547 I SHOULD HAVE NEVER DONE THAT. I FEEL AWFUL. 319 00:18:00,580 --> 00:18:02,582 NOW I'M FEELING BETTER. 320 00:18:05,652 --> 00:18:08,555 WELL, DO ME A FAVOR. IN THE FUTURE 321 00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:10,423 WHEN I DO SOMETHING STUPID, 322 00:18:10,457 --> 00:18:13,293 COULD YOU JUST GROUND ME LIKE A NORMAL MOM? 323 00:18:13,326 --> 00:18:15,562 OH, TEDDY. 324 00:18:17,497 --> 00:18:21,100 I THINK WE'VE ESTABLISHED I'LL NEVER BE A NORMAL MOM. 325 00:18:30,477 --> 00:18:32,512 ( chatting ) 326 00:18:34,347 --> 00:18:36,449 - OH. - ( screams ) 327 00:18:38,651 --> 00:18:43,290 VAN BRUNDT. HEY, WHAT'S UP? 328 00:18:43,323 --> 00:18:46,393 - GOT A NEW PHONE. - OH, RIGHT, HOW MUCH DO I OWE YOU? 329 00:18:46,426 --> 00:18:49,562 DO YOU KNOW WHEN YOU GET A NEW PHONE YOU CAN CHECK YOUR OLD MESSAGES? 330 00:18:51,598 --> 00:18:53,900 WELL, THAT DOESN'T SOUND RIGHT. 331 00:18:53,933 --> 00:18:57,237 I HEARD WHAT YOU SAID ABOUT ME. ALL OF IT! 332 00:18:59,439 --> 00:19:02,342 - OKAY, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO TO US? - I'M GOING TO LET YOU CHOOSE. 333 00:19:02,375 --> 00:19:04,511 - I MADE A LIST. - WOW. 334 00:19:04,544 --> 00:19:07,314 YOU'RE PRETTY ORGANIZED FOR A BULLY. 335 00:19:10,250 --> 00:19:14,654 I DON'T MEAN TO CORRECT YOU, BUT THERE'S NO "J" IN GOUGE. 336 00:19:17,324 --> 00:19:20,960 LET'S GO WITH NUMBER FIVE. AT LEAST IT'S NOT PAINFUL. 337 00:19:20,993 --> 00:19:23,230 - TWO NUMBER FIVES, PLEASE. - THANK YOU. 338 00:19:25,598 --> 00:19:27,734 ( grunting ) 339 00:19:35,608 --> 00:19:37,644 WE BUTT-DIALED VAN BRUNDT. 340 00:19:39,579 --> 00:19:42,349 I DIDN'T SAY STOP. 341 00:19:48,388 --> 00:19:51,758 OKAY, WHIRLYBIRD, THIS IS YOUR FINAL MISSION. 342 00:19:51,791 --> 00:19:55,428 TAKE HAPPY HAPPY HORSE FAR FAR AWAY. 343 00:19:58,698 --> 00:20:02,269 LAUNCH-- THREE, TWO, ONE. 344 00:20:08,675 --> 00:20:10,543 YEAH, IT'S GOING GOOD. 345 00:20:10,577 --> 00:20:12,645 NO NO. NO, WHIRLYBIRD. 346 00:20:12,679 --> 00:20:14,714 LOOK OUT FOR THE POWER LINE, NO! 347 00:20:21,654 --> 00:20:23,490 * I'm a happy happy horse 348 00:20:23,523 --> 00:20:25,292 * Happy happy happy horse * 349 00:20:25,325 --> 00:20:26,626 * I'm a happy happy horse 350 00:20:26,659 --> 00:20:28,695 * Happy happy happy horse * 351 00:20:28,728 --> 00:20:30,663 - ( whinnies ) - ( sobs ) 352 00:20:30,697 --> 00:20:32,632 - * I'm a happy happy horse... * - ( crying ) 353 00:20:32,665 --> 00:20:34,434 * Happy happy happy horse 354 00:20:34,467 --> 00:20:36,503 * I'm a happy happy horse * 355 00:20:36,536 --> 00:20:38,571 * Happy happy happy horse. 356 00:20:41,574 --> 00:20:44,277 Hey, Charlie, so, um... 357 00:20:44,311 --> 00:20:46,279 I have a little advice for you. 358 00:20:46,313 --> 00:20:48,281 If you ever want to fool a parent, 359 00:20:48,315 --> 00:20:51,284 and make them think they're cool, Dad is definitely the way to go. 360 00:20:51,318 --> 00:20:54,020 Just ask him about his job and pretend you're interested. 361 00:20:54,053 --> 00:20:56,389 Dad: Heard that. You're grounded. 362 00:20:56,423 --> 00:20:58,591 ( growls ) Baby monitor! 363 00:20:58,625 --> 00:21:00,427 Stupid technology. 364 00:21:00,460 --> 00:21:01,761 Heard that too. 365 00:21:03,396 --> 00:21:05,298 Yeah, I can't even imagine 366 00:21:05,332 --> 00:21:08,034 what kind of gadgets they'll have when you're a teenager, 367 00:21:08,067 --> 00:21:10,437 - so-- - Good luck, Charlie. 368 00:21:12,372 --> 00:21:14,841 HEY, HONEY. HERE WE GO. CAREFUL IT'S HOT. 369 00:21:14,874 --> 00:21:18,811 UM, I HAD A LITTLE QUICK QUESTION TO ASK YOU. 370 00:21:18,845 --> 00:21:22,482 - SURE, MOM, WHAT'S UP? - OKAY, I WANT YOU JUST TO BE TOTALLY HONEST WITH ME. 371 00:21:22,515 --> 00:21:25,352 I AM COOLER THAN MARY LOU WENTZ, RIGHT? 372 00:21:26,686 --> 00:21:29,856 OF COURSE YOU ARE, MOM. 373 00:21:29,889 --> 00:21:33,593 NOW TELL ME THE TRUTH. I AM COOLER THAN AMY DUNCAN, RIGHT? 374 00:21:33,626 --> 00:21:35,728 DEFINITELY. 375 00:21:45,772 --> 00:21:48,475 ( deep voice ) Psst! Hey, sweetheart. 376 00:21:48,508 --> 00:21:49,409 Yeah, I'm talking to you. 377 00:21:49,442 --> 00:21:52,779 Listen, we got a problem with your brother. 378 00:21:54,547 --> 00:21:56,616 Not him, the little one 379 00:21:56,649 --> 00:21:58,685 with the big mouth. 380 00:22:00,653 --> 00:22:03,356 - YOU JUST TALKING WITH CHARLIE? - WHAT? 381 00:22:03,390 --> 00:22:05,658 ( sighs ) NEVER MIND. 382 00:22:07,460 --> 00:22:10,863 Anyway, that little stinker was trying to get rid of me. 383 00:22:10,897 --> 00:22:13,533 I say we get rid of him. 384 00:22:13,566 --> 00:22:15,101 'Cause that would make me-- 385 00:22:15,134 --> 00:22:16,603 * A happy happy horse 386 00:22:16,636 --> 00:22:17,904 * Happy happy happy horse. * 387 00:22:21,674 --> 00:22:24,611 STUPID HORSE. 388 00:22:24,644 --> 00:22:26,613 Watch your back, kid. 389 00:22:31,584 --> 00:22:32,885 * I'm a happy happy horse 390 00:22:32,919 --> 00:22:34,821 * Happy happy happy horse. *