1 00:00:00,055 --> 00:00:01,403 So here's what you missed on Glee. 2 00:00:01,425 --> 00:00:03,446 It's springtime in the longest year ever at McKinley 3 00:00:03,468 --> 00:00:04,606 And it's almost time for graduation. 4 00:00:04,630 --> 00:00:06,283 Sue's principal and Becky's her Beckretary, 5 00:00:06,300 --> 00:00:07,281 Get out, bitch! 6 00:00:07,308 --> 00:00:08,386 Which is good because Becky made it clear 7 00:00:08,404 --> 00:00:09,791 She doesn't ever want to leave McKinley. 8 00:00:09,809 --> 00:00:11,993 Jake cheated on Marley with demon hellspawn Bree 9 00:00:12,011 --> 00:00:13,451 And he, like, didn't even say "I'm sorry" 10 00:00:13,469 --> 00:00:14,776 Which totally hit Marley like a ton of bricks 11 00:00:14,794 --> 00:00:15,899 That she broke through with a wrecking ball. 12 00:00:15,916 --> 00:00:16,597 Say what? 13 00:00:16,614 --> 00:00:18,497 And that's what you missed on Glee. 14 00:00:30,419 --> 00:00:33,490 Hey, Sue, you mind telling me what's going on around here? 15 00:00:33,523 --> 00:00:34,818 Why, it is the First Annual 16 00:00:34,859 --> 00:00:36,490 McKinley High Career Fair. 17 00:00:36,523 --> 00:00:39,201 Where students come to expose themselves to the job market 18 00:00:39,234 --> 00:00:41,948 and its entry-level corporate recruiters. 19 00:00:41,989 --> 00:00:45,060 Who we hope, in turn, do not, (chuckles) 20 00:00:45,101 --> 00:00:46,969 well, expose themselves to our students. 21 00:00:47,002 --> 00:00:48,461 But Sue, these jobs are-are terrible. 22 00:00:48,494 --> 00:00:49,767 It' not the '90s anymore, William. 23 00:00:49,808 --> 00:00:52,618 When any high-school dropout could stumble his way 24 00:00:52,652 --> 00:00:55,515 into a six-figure salary as COO of a dotcom startup. 25 00:00:55,548 --> 00:00:58,658 Upon graduation, our students will be entering 26 00:00:58,691 --> 00:01:00,735 the most competitive job market in recent history. 27 00:01:00,776 --> 00:01:02,547 But Sue, the thing that disturbs me 28 00:01:02,580 --> 00:01:06,042 is I don't see a booth theater or music or dance. 29 00:01:06,075 --> 00:01:07,441 There is nothing here 30 00:01:07,475 --> 00:01:08,841 representing a career in the arts! 31 00:01:08,874 --> 00:01:10,105 Well, that's because there's no such thing 32 00:01:10,146 --> 00:01:11,381 as a career in the arts. 33 00:01:11,414 --> 00:01:14,157 William, I will not encourage members of this student body 34 00:01:14,190 --> 00:01:16,589 to further endanger their already uncertain futures 35 00:01:16,622 --> 00:01:20,503 in the unrealistic and narcissistic pursuit of stardom 36 00:01:20,536 --> 00:01:22,577 when the very best they're likely to achieve 37 00:01:22,610 --> 00:01:24,178 is coaching a high school Glee Club 38 00:01:24,219 --> 00:01:25,877 and marrying a redheaded googly-eyed homo afarensis 39 00:01:25,910 --> 00:01:29,283 with early-onset-dressing- like-an-old lady disorder. 40 00:01:29,316 --> 00:01:31,816 Not gonna do it. However, if you would like 41 00:01:31,849 --> 00:01:34,317 to set up a stool in between Salad Artistry 42 00:01:34,358 --> 00:01:38,108 and... Fecal Sculpture, 43 00:01:38,141 --> 00:01:39,980 well, you're more than welcome 44 00:01:40,013 --> 00:01:41,420 to regale passersby 45 00:01:41,453 --> 00:01:43,953 with your inspiring story of how you dreamt of Broadway stardom 46 00:01:43,986 --> 00:01:45,955 and ended up rapping for high schoolers 47 00:01:45,988 --> 00:01:46,957 with a head of hair that looks just 48 00:01:46,990 --> 00:01:49,267 like Olympia Dukakis's merkin. 49 00:01:49,990 --> 00:01:52,951 Sync & corrections by wilson0804 www.Addic7ed.com 50 00:01:53,141 --> 00:01:55,839 Hey, guys, in spite of the complete lack 51 00:01:55,872 --> 00:01:57,607 of representation at the Career Fair, 52 00:01:57,640 --> 00:01:58,744 I know that a lot of you are thinking 53 00:01:58,777 --> 00:02:00,275 about a career in the arts. 54 00:02:00,316 --> 00:02:01,885 Well, it's no secret that Sue Sylvester doesn't believe 55 00:02:01,918 --> 00:02:04,298 that an artistic career is a very practical idea. 56 00:02:04,327 --> 00:02:06,565 And, for once, I have to admit she's right. 57 00:02:06,598 --> 00:02:08,093 It's completely impractical. 58 00:02:08,133 --> 00:02:09,933 You know, anyone pursuing the arts needs to go in 59 00:02:09,966 --> 00:02:11,736 with their eyes wide open. We're talking 60 00:02:11,769 --> 00:02:14,781 zero job security and impossible odds. But... 61 00:02:14,814 --> 00:02:17,612 I've always believed that you have to pursue what you love. 62 00:02:17,645 --> 00:02:18,781 And that's why this week's assignment 63 00:02:18,814 --> 00:02:20,455 is about a goofy-looking kid who struggled 64 00:02:20,488 --> 00:02:22,321 for years in the music business. 65 00:02:22,354 --> 00:02:24,120 Finally. It's Marilyn Manson Week. 66 00:02:24,161 --> 00:02:25,128 Close. 67 00:02:25,161 --> 00:02:26,823 Billy Joel. 68 00:02:26,856 --> 00:02:28,960 - Who? - Oh, just a musical genius 69 00:02:28,993 --> 00:02:31,365 who's sold over 150 million records worldwide. 70 00:02:31,406 --> 00:02:32,775 WILL: That's right. 71 00:02:32,808 --> 00:02:34,909 Billy had to fight every step of the way in his career. 72 00:02:34,942 --> 00:02:36,509 He had countless failures and disappointments: 73 00:02:36,542 --> 00:02:38,006 writing songs that nobody wanted, 74 00:02:38,047 --> 00:02:40,420 playing piano in seedy bars just to pay the rent, 75 00:02:40,453 --> 00:02:43,419 being told he'd never make it because he didn't look "right." 76 00:02:43,452 --> 00:02:46,258 Translation: too Jewish. 77 00:02:46,290 --> 00:02:47,994 But he ignored the haters and he kept 78 00:02:48,027 --> 00:02:50,164 pursuing his dream, becoming the third 79 00:02:50,197 --> 00:02:52,634 best-selling solo artist of all time. 80 00:02:52,675 --> 00:02:53,772 I mean, he is a true inspiration 81 00:02:53,805 --> 00:02:55,610 to anyone pursuing a career in the arts, 82 00:02:55,643 --> 00:02:57,042 like our very own. 83 00:02:57,075 --> 00:02:59,545 Mr. Blaine Anderson and Mr. Sam Evans. 84 00:02:59,578 --> 00:03:00,978 (cheering and applause) That's right! All right, 85 00:03:01,011 --> 00:03:02,613 as some of you may or may not know, this week is my big. 86 00:03:02,654 --> 00:03:04,391 NYADA audition. I know. 87 00:03:04,423 --> 00:03:05,958 It's terrifying. So I'm leaving today 88 00:03:05,991 --> 00:03:08,020 to maybe get some last-minute tips from Kurt and Rachel. 89 00:03:08,053 --> 00:03:09,755 And I'm going with him because I have an interview 90 00:03:09,788 --> 00:03:12,289 with the theater department at Hunter College. 91 00:03:12,322 --> 00:03:13,457 They saw and they loved 92 00:03:13,490 --> 00:03:15,332 my "Tornado of Talent" impressions reel. 93 00:03:15,365 --> 00:03:17,599 And I'm up for this awesome scholarship, 94 00:03:17,632 --> 00:03:20,136 the Channing Tatum Former Male Stripper Grant. 95 00:03:20,169 --> 00:03:21,472 But we spoke to Mr. Shue 96 00:03:21,505 --> 00:03:23,609 and, because we have to miss this week's lesson, 97 00:03:23,642 --> 00:03:25,682 he thought the least we could do is maybe... 98 00:03:25,715 --> 00:03:29,552 Kick it off with our very own take on a classic BJ. 99 00:03:29,593 --> 00:03:30,489 Billy... Billy Joel. 100 00:03:30,522 --> 00:03:31,826 Hit it. 101 00:03:31,859 --> 00:03:35,025 (Billy Joel's "Movin' Out" begins) 102 00:03:38,501 --> 00:03:39,701 ♪ Ooh, ooh ♪ 103 00:03:39,734 --> 00:03:41,743 ♪ Uh-huh ♪ 104 00:03:41,776 --> 00:03:43,479 ♪ Mmm, mmm ♪ 105 00:03:46,080 --> 00:03:49,386 ♪ Anthony works in the grocery store ♪ 106 00:03:49,419 --> 00:03:52,554 ♪ Savin' his pennies for someday ♪ 107 00:03:52,587 --> 00:03:56,056 SAM/BLAINE: ♪ Mama Leone left a note on the door ♪ 108 00:03:56,089 --> 00:03:59,394 ♪ She said, "Sonny, move out to the country" ♪ 109 00:03:59,427 --> 00:04:01,469 ♪ Oh, but workin' too hard can give you ♪ 110 00:04:01,502 --> 00:04:03,368 ♪ A heart attack-ack-ack-ack-ack ♪ 111 00:04:03,409 --> 00:04:07,176 BLAINE/SAM: ♪ You ought to know by now ♪ You ought to know by ♪ 112 00:04:07,209 --> 00:04:10,446 ♪ Who needs a house out in Hackensack? ♪ ♪ Now ♪ 113 00:04:10,479 --> 00:04:14,449 ♪ Is that all you get for your money? ♪ 114 00:04:14,482 --> 00:04:17,756 ♪ And it seems such a waste of time ♪ 115 00:04:17,789 --> 00:04:20,426 ♪ If that's what it's all about ♪ 116 00:04:20,459 --> 00:04:25,362 SAM/BLAINE: ♪ Mama, if that's movin' up then I'm... ♪ 117 00:04:25,396 --> 00:04:27,164 ♪ Movin' out ♪ 118 00:04:28,535 --> 00:04:31,271 ♪ Mmm, I'm movin' out ♪ 119 00:04:33,880 --> 00:04:37,184 ♪ Sergeant O'Leary is walkin' the beat ♪ 120 00:04:37,217 --> 00:04:40,045 ♪ At night he becomes a bartender ♪ 121 00:04:40,078 --> 00:04:42,381 BLAINE/SAM: ♪ He works at Mister Cacciatore's ♪ 122 00:04:42,414 --> 00:04:44,181 ♪ Down on Sullivan Street ♪ 123 00:04:44,222 --> 00:04:47,223 ♪ Across from the medical center ♪ 124 00:04:47,256 --> 00:04:49,224 ♪ Yeah, he's tradin' in his Chevy ♪ 125 00:04:49,257 --> 00:04:51,759 ♪ For a Cadillac-ac-ac-ac-ac ♪ 126 00:04:51,792 --> 00:04:54,770 ♪ You ought to know by now ♪ ♪ You ought to know by ♪ 127 00:04:54,803 --> 00:04:56,771 ♪ You can pay Uncle Sam ♪ Now ♪ 128 00:04:56,804 --> 00:04:58,568 ♪ With the overtime ♪ 129 00:04:58,601 --> 00:05:02,070 ♪ Is that all you get for your money? ♪ 130 00:05:02,103 --> 00:05:05,273 ♪ And if that's what you have in mind ♪ 131 00:05:05,313 --> 00:05:08,619 ♪ Yeah, if that's what you're all about ♪ 132 00:05:08,652 --> 00:05:13,953 BLAINE/SAM: ♪ Good luck movin' up 'cause I'm... ♪ 133 00:05:13,986 --> 00:05:17,629 ♪ And if that's what you have in mind ♪ 134 00:05:17,662 --> 00:05:21,425 ♪ Yeah, if that's what you're all about ♪ 135 00:05:21,458 --> 00:05:26,436 BLAINE/SAM: ♪ Good luck movin' up 'cause I'm... ♪ 136 00:05:26,469 --> 00:05:27,973 ♪ Movin' out ♪ 137 00:05:28,006 --> 00:05:31,637 ♪ Mmm, I'm movin' out ♪ 138 00:05:31,677 --> 00:05:33,642 ♪ Mm-hmm, mmm ♪ 139 00:05:33,675 --> 00:05:36,504 ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ 140 00:05:36,545 --> 00:05:39,008 ♪ I'm movin' out. ♪ 141 00:05:39,041 --> 00:05:41,421 Oh. Ah! Hi! Hi! Ta-da! 142 00:05:41,454 --> 00:05:43,822 Hi! Wha... Oh, hi! Oh, my God! What's going on? 143 00:05:43,855 --> 00:05:46,420 Hi! I can't believe you guys are here. What? You guys are... 144 00:05:46,453 --> 00:05:48,291 Oh, my God. You guys are... Oh, wow! Hi! Mwah. 145 00:05:48,324 --> 00:05:51,825 Oh, my God. You guys... (school bell rings) 146 00:05:58,931 --> 00:06:00,234 Hey, Becky. 147 00:06:00,267 --> 00:06:02,338 Hi, hot stuff. Want to suck face 148 00:06:02,370 --> 00:06:04,430 and look at my boobs? 149 00:06:04,471 --> 00:06:06,439 No. Um, can I ask you something? 150 00:06:06,472 --> 00:06:08,335 What do you plan on doing after you graduate? 151 00:06:08,377 --> 00:06:09,840 Why? What are you gonna do? 152 00:06:09,873 --> 00:06:11,712 Film school. I'm going to college in New York. 153 00:06:11,745 --> 00:06:13,578 Ew. Lame. 154 00:06:13,611 --> 00:06:16,388 College is for suckers. 155 00:06:16,421 --> 00:06:18,723 I know college might not be for everybody, but... 156 00:06:18,756 --> 00:06:20,557 you know, Becky, when I was looking at schools 157 00:06:20,587 --> 00:06:21,891 that were good for people with disabilities, 158 00:06:21,924 --> 00:06:23,061 I learned that a lot of them 159 00:06:23,094 --> 00:06:24,861 have programs for mentally handicapable students. 160 00:06:24,894 --> 00:06:27,197 And I'd be happy to help you do some research. 161 00:06:27,230 --> 00:06:29,668 SUE: Oh, that won't be necessary. 162 00:06:29,701 --> 00:06:32,066 Hey, Becky, will you excuse us 163 00:06:32,099 --> 00:06:34,234 for just a sec? Sure thing, Coach. 164 00:06:34,267 --> 00:06:36,905 (quietly): What exactly are you doing? 165 00:06:36,938 --> 00:06:39,040 I-I just want to make sure that Becky was aware 166 00:06:39,073 --> 00:06:40,302 of what all her options are. 167 00:06:40,335 --> 00:06:41,905 She could go to college and get a job... 168 00:06:41,946 --> 00:06:43,916 Well, she has a job. She's my Beckretary. 169 00:06:43,949 --> 00:06:45,654 And here she will remain indefinitely 170 00:06:45,687 --> 00:06:47,517 in a safe and stable environment, 171 00:06:47,550 --> 00:06:49,683 working alongside someone who cares very deeply 172 00:06:49,716 --> 00:06:51,352 for her. I was trying to help. 173 00:06:51,385 --> 00:06:53,753 Well, if you really want to help, Muppet Stephen Hawking, 174 00:06:53,786 --> 00:06:55,587 you'll stop inserting yourself into situations 175 00:06:55,589 --> 00:06:56,757 you know nothing about. 176 00:06:57,864 --> 00:06:59,863 (school bell rings) 177 00:07:02,532 --> 00:07:04,531 (sighs) 178 00:07:08,873 --> 00:07:10,114 I'm sorry. 179 00:07:10,147 --> 00:07:11,580 For breaking into my locker? 180 00:07:11,613 --> 00:07:13,715 For breaking your trust. (groans) 181 00:07:13,748 --> 00:07:15,186 Marley, wait. 182 00:07:15,219 --> 00:07:16,952 Look, 183 00:07:16,985 --> 00:07:19,120 I screwed up. I made a stupid mistake, 184 00:07:19,153 --> 00:07:20,623 and I want to make it up to you. 185 00:07:20,656 --> 00:07:22,087 Please just let me say I'm sorry. 186 00:07:22,120 --> 00:07:24,254 You shouldn't have to. You are who you are, 187 00:07:24,287 --> 00:07:26,461 and I knew who you were when I got into this. 188 00:07:26,494 --> 00:07:28,460 It was stupid of me to try to change you. 189 00:07:28,493 --> 00:07:30,060 I did change. I'm not that guy anymore. 190 00:07:30,093 --> 00:07:31,060 You are. 191 00:07:31,093 --> 00:07:32,332 You'll always be that guy. 192 00:07:40,100 --> 00:07:42,737 Can I get you guys a refill? Why are you still working? 193 00:07:42,770 --> 00:07:44,402 Aren't you rehearsing, like, 24/7? 194 00:07:44,443 --> 00:07:46,443 Fanny Brice was a working girl. My director and I think 195 00:07:46,476 --> 00:07:48,443 it's really important to keep the character 196 00:07:48,476 --> 00:07:51,253 as alive and authentic as possible. 197 00:07:51,286 --> 00:07:54,222 So, did you boys like those historical sites I recommended? 198 00:07:54,255 --> 00:07:55,558 Um, we checked out that deconstructed bathhouse 199 00:07:55,591 --> 00:07:56,759 on St. Mark's 200 00:07:56,796 --> 00:07:58,127 where Tennessee Williams got in that fistfight 201 00:07:58,160 --> 00:07:59,294 - with Tallulah Bankhead. - Oh, yeah. 202 00:07:59,327 --> 00:08:00,390 - That was awesome. - Cool. 203 00:08:00,423 --> 00:08:02,724 Uh, but it was mostly campus visits. 204 00:08:02,757 --> 00:08:04,491 Um, NYU, Columbia... 205 00:08:04,532 --> 00:08:05,699 Why? You're going to NYADA. 206 00:08:05,732 --> 00:08:07,196 I-I need safety schools, Kurt. 207 00:08:07,229 --> 00:08:08,869 I haven't gotten in yet. But you will 208 00:08:08,902 --> 00:08:10,334 as soon as you audition. 209 00:08:10,367 --> 00:08:11,734 The way I've talked you up to Carmen Tibideaux, 210 00:08:11,775 --> 00:08:12,741 she's gonna offer you 211 00:08:12,774 --> 00:08:14,507 a spot on the spot. 212 00:08:14,540 --> 00:08:16,305 Which reminds me, 213 00:08:16,338 --> 00:08:17,610 are you up for a little trial run? 214 00:08:17,643 --> 00:08:18,939 I don't want to send you into the lions' den 215 00:08:18,980 --> 00:08:20,349 under-rehearsed. Come on. 216 00:08:20,383 --> 00:08:22,614 Yes. Yes. 217 00:08:22,647 --> 00:08:24,118 Come on. Don't worry. 218 00:08:24,151 --> 00:08:25,581 The piano awaits. 219 00:08:25,621 --> 00:08:27,747 Uh, hello, everyone. 220 00:08:27,788 --> 00:08:29,355 Welcome to the Spotlight Diner 221 00:08:29,388 --> 00:08:32,861 and to a very special performance. 222 00:08:32,894 --> 00:08:34,660 Seriously? You all need to be stopped. 223 00:08:34,693 --> 00:08:36,459 That's enough. (Bell dings) Now, 224 00:08:36,492 --> 00:08:39,901 you may not know the name Blaine Anderson yet, but you will 225 00:08:39,934 --> 00:08:42,304 soon when it's lit up all over Broadway. 226 00:08:42,337 --> 00:08:45,639 All right, ladies and gentlemen, Blaine Anderson. 227 00:08:45,672 --> 00:08:48,710 (applause) 228 00:08:48,743 --> 00:08:51,448 (playing piano) Thank you, Kurt. 229 00:08:51,481 --> 00:08:53,280 Thank you, everyone. 230 00:08:53,313 --> 00:08:56,288 Sing along if you know it. 231 00:08:56,321 --> 00:08:58,657 (Billy Joel's "Piano Man" begins) 232 00:09:06,500 --> 00:09:11,668 ♪ It's 9:00 on a Saturday ♪ 233 00:09:11,708 --> 00:09:14,709 ♪ The regular crowd shuffles in ♪ 234 00:09:14,742 --> 00:09:16,540 ♪ There's an old man ♪ 235 00:09:16,581 --> 00:09:18,211 ♪ Sitting next to me ♪ 236 00:09:18,244 --> 00:09:20,915 ♪ Making love to his tonic and gin ♪ 237 00:09:20,948 --> 00:09:23,653 (playing harmonica) 238 00:09:23,686 --> 00:09:29,054 ♪ He says, "Son, can you play me a memory? ♪" 239 00:09:29,095 --> 00:09:32,663 ♪ "I'm not really sure how it goes ♪ 240 00:09:32,696 --> 00:09:36,600 ♪ "But it's sad and it's sweet and I knew it complete ♪ 241 00:09:36,633 --> 00:09:41,006 ♪ When I wore a younger man's clothes" ♪ 242 00:09:41,039 --> 00:09:45,971 ♪ La, la-la, la-la-la ♪ 243 00:09:46,004 --> 00:09:48,940 ♪ La-la, la-la-la ♪ 244 00:09:48,973 --> 00:09:50,108 ♪ La-la ♪ 245 00:09:50,141 --> 00:09:53,047 (playing harmonica) 246 00:09:53,080 --> 00:09:55,183 ♪ Sing us a song ♪ 247 00:09:55,216 --> 00:09:56,751 ♪ You're the piano man ♪ 248 00:09:56,784 --> 00:10:00,287 ♪ Sing us a song tonight ♪ 249 00:10:00,327 --> 00:10:02,962 ♪ Well, we're all in the mood ♪ 250 00:10:02,995 --> 00:10:04,837 ♪ For a melody ♪ 251 00:10:04,870 --> 00:10:07,804 ♪ And you've got us feeling all right ♪ 252 00:10:07,837 --> 00:10:11,035 ♪ Oh, la, la-la ♪ 253 00:10:11,076 --> 00:10:14,104 ♪ La-la-la ♪ 254 00:10:14,137 --> 00:10:18,515 ♪ La-la, la-la-la, la-la ♪ 255 00:10:18,548 --> 00:10:21,515 (playing harmonica) 256 00:10:21,548 --> 00:10:24,883 ♪ Sing us a song, you're the piano man ♪ 257 00:10:24,924 --> 00:10:28,260 ♪ Sing us a song tonight ♪ 258 00:10:28,293 --> 00:10:30,894 ♪ Well, we're all in the mood ♪ 259 00:10:30,927 --> 00:10:32,766 ♪ For a melody ♪ 260 00:10:32,799 --> 00:10:34,902 ♪ And you've got us feeling ♪ 261 00:10:34,935 --> 00:10:36,967 ♪ All right ♪ 262 00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:40,239 (playing piano) 263 00:10:40,272 --> 00:10:43,972 (harmonica joins in) 264 00:10:44,005 --> 00:10:45,477 (song ends) 265 00:10:45,510 --> 00:10:47,744 (cheering and applause) 266 00:10:47,785 --> 00:10:49,080 That was incredible! 267 00:10:49,113 --> 00:10:51,721 There's no way you're not getting into NYADA! 268 00:10:51,754 --> 00:10:53,154 Then all our dreams will come true! 269 00:10:53,186 --> 00:10:54,657 (whoops) Yeah! 270 00:10:54,690 --> 00:10:56,392 Thank you. (chuckles) 271 00:10:58,596 --> 00:11:00,661 Hey, Becky? 272 00:11:00,694 --> 00:11:02,904 What do you want, a threesome with Kitty? 273 00:11:02,937 --> 00:11:04,167 Um... no. 274 00:11:04,200 --> 00:11:06,197 I was doing some research 275 00:11:06,238 --> 00:11:08,573 about those college programs I mentioned, and, 276 00:11:08,606 --> 00:11:10,101 well, there are lots. 277 00:11:10,142 --> 00:11:11,837 Like, over 200, all over the country. 278 00:11:11,878 --> 00:11:13,444 Some of them even have cheerleading. 279 00:11:13,477 --> 00:11:15,476 I can do cheerleading in college? 280 00:11:15,508 --> 00:11:17,243 You can do anything you want, Becky. 281 00:11:17,276 --> 00:11:18,779 And I want you to know that you have choices, 282 00:11:18,812 --> 00:11:19,947 and I'm not gonna give up on you. 283 00:11:19,980 --> 00:11:22,083 I know I have choices. 284 00:11:22,116 --> 00:11:24,653 My choices is none of your business, 285 00:11:24,686 --> 00:11:26,327 Artie! I don't want 286 00:11:26,360 --> 00:11:29,591 to go to college, and I don't want your stupid pamphlets! 287 00:11:29,624 --> 00:11:32,095 Butt out! 288 00:11:32,128 --> 00:11:34,136 (school bell ringing, Jake breathes loudly) 289 00:11:34,169 --> 00:11:36,304 Dude, what's wrong with you? 290 00:11:36,337 --> 00:11:38,600 Me? Nothing. 291 00:11:38,641 --> 00:11:40,135 Well, there has to be something, because I can't figure out 292 00:11:40,168 --> 00:11:41,334 why anybody would screw up the best thing 293 00:11:41,375 --> 00:11:42,470 in their life the way you just did. 294 00:11:42,503 --> 00:11:43,869 Marley said it herself. 295 00:11:43,910 --> 00:11:45,740 People know who I am, and they know what I do. 296 00:11:45,773 --> 00:11:49,908 You get involved at your own risk. Hey! 297 00:11:49,949 --> 00:11:51,612 I can't believe you could be so stupid. 298 00:11:51,645 --> 00:11:53,244 What do you want from me, Ryder? 299 00:11:53,285 --> 00:11:54,525 We spend every day in that room 300 00:11:54,551 --> 00:11:55,918 telling each other to embrace who we are. 301 00:11:55,951 --> 00:11:58,457 Do you want me to be different? To not be me? 302 00:11:58,490 --> 00:11:59,690 'Cause that's never gonna happen. 303 00:11:59,730 --> 00:12:01,826 So start learning to like the real Jake Puckerman, 304 00:12:01,866 --> 00:12:03,066 or leave me the hell alone. 305 00:12:03,099 --> 00:12:05,098 (Billy Joel's "My Life" begins) 306 00:12:14,480 --> 00:12:16,414 ♪ Got a call from an old friend ♪ 307 00:12:16,448 --> 00:12:18,985 ♪ We used to be real close ♪ 308 00:12:21,292 --> 00:12:26,061 ♪ Said he couldn't go on the American way ♪ 309 00:12:27,700 --> 00:12:30,034 ♪ Closed the shop, sold the house ♪ 310 00:12:30,067 --> 00:12:33,570 ♪ Bought a ticket to the West Coast ♪ 311 00:12:35,571 --> 00:12:40,507 ♪ Now he gives them a stand-up routine in L.A. ♪ 312 00:12:45,750 --> 00:12:48,387 ♪ I don't need you to worry for me ♪ 313 00:12:48,420 --> 00:12:50,785 ♪ 'Cause I'm all right ♪ 314 00:12:52,817 --> 00:12:57,691 ♪ I don't want you to tell me it's time to come home ♪ 315 00:13:00,027 --> 00:13:02,602 ♪ I don't care what you say anymore ♪ 316 00:13:02,635 --> 00:13:05,036 ♪ This is my life ♪ 317 00:13:06,744 --> 00:13:11,417 ♪ Go ahead with your own life and leave me alone ♪ 318 00:13:11,450 --> 00:13:14,681 ♪ I never said you had to offer me a second chance ♪ 319 00:13:14,722 --> 00:13:18,984 ♪ I never said you had to ♪ 320 00:13:19,024 --> 00:13:21,323 ♪ I never said I was a victim of circumstance ♪ 321 00:13:21,364 --> 00:13:24,995 ♪ Of circumstance ♪ 322 00:13:25,028 --> 00:13:28,898 ♪ I still belong ♪ I... still... belong ♪ 323 00:13:28,931 --> 00:13:30,233 ♪ Don't get me wrong ♪ 324 00:13:30,266 --> 00:13:32,233 ♪ Get me wrong ♪ 325 00:13:32,274 --> 00:13:35,171 ♪ And you can speak your mind ♪ 326 00:13:35,212 --> 00:13:38,582 ♪ But not on my time ♪ 327 00:13:38,615 --> 00:13:41,015 ♪ I don't care what you say anymore ♪ 328 00:13:41,048 --> 00:13:43,984 ♪ This is my life ♪ 329 00:13:46,120 --> 00:13:52,724 ♪ Go ahead with your own life and leave me alone ♪ 330 00:13:52,757 --> 00:13:56,232 ♪ Keep it to yourself, it's my life ♪ 331 00:13:59,971 --> 00:14:02,873 ♪ Keep it to yourself, it's my life. ♪ 332 00:14:09,289 --> 00:14:10,592 (school bell ringing) 333 00:14:10,625 --> 00:14:12,225 I see your grades have improved 334 00:14:12,258 --> 00:14:14,059 over the past couple of semesters. 335 00:14:14,100 --> 00:14:17,239 Yeah, I kind of had an, um... a breakthrough a few months ago, 336 00:14:17,272 --> 00:14:21,513 'cause I'm-I'm not, like, a... a good student, but I realize 337 00:14:21,546 --> 00:14:23,812 that what I'm really good at is impressions, 338 00:14:23,852 --> 00:14:25,886 so, I started to do this impression 339 00:14:25,919 --> 00:14:30,495 of a good high school student, and it... it's kind of working. 340 00:14:30,528 --> 00:14:32,594 Okay. 341 00:14:32,627 --> 00:14:35,165 Tell me why you want to go to Hunter. 342 00:14:35,206 --> 00:14:37,144 Um, I-I don't know that much about it, 343 00:14:37,177 --> 00:14:39,110 except that there... well, there's more women than guys, 344 00:14:39,143 --> 00:14:40,706 and that's... that's great for me, 345 00:14:40,739 --> 00:14:42,736 because I'm totally into feminist issues. 346 00:14:42,769 --> 00:14:44,705 Like, just because women don't make 347 00:14:44,746 --> 00:14:47,211 as much as guys do to do the same job, 348 00:14:47,244 --> 00:14:48,615 it's totally not cool 349 00:14:48,656 --> 00:14:50,720 that they aren't given the same amount of respect. 350 00:14:50,753 --> 00:14:52,224 And, like, why can't...? 351 00:14:52,257 --> 00:14:55,023 Well, why can guys go shirtless at the beach, but chicks can't? 352 00:14:55,056 --> 00:14:56,759 Oh. 353 00:14:56,792 --> 00:14:59,464 Sorry. Uh... girls can't. 354 00:14:59,498 --> 00:15:01,861 I guess even I have a lot to learn still. 355 00:15:03,366 --> 00:15:04,902 I'm also super jazzed 356 00:15:04,935 --> 00:15:06,839 to be going to school in New York City. 357 00:15:06,872 --> 00:15:08,072 ♪ Hello. ♪ 358 00:15:08,105 --> 00:15:09,873 All the diversity. Oh. 359 00:15:11,713 --> 00:15:13,240 So, you're black. 360 00:15:13,281 --> 00:15:16,249 That's... That-that must be interesting. 361 00:15:16,282 --> 00:15:18,354 Do you know...? 362 00:15:18,387 --> 00:15:20,491 This is a shot in the dark. 363 00:15:20,525 --> 00:15:23,721 Do you know Mercedes Jones? 364 00:15:24,657 --> 00:15:26,088 SAM: Oh, thanks, but I'm... 365 00:15:26,121 --> 00:15:27,561 - I'm not hungry. - Look, I'm sure 366 00:15:27,594 --> 00:15:28,729 that there are other schools 367 00:15:28,762 --> 00:15:29,898 that have more specific scholarships 368 00:15:29,931 --> 00:15:30,899 catered just for you. 369 00:15:30,932 --> 00:15:32,867 Can I, um, tell you a secret? 370 00:15:32,900 --> 00:15:34,035 Yeah. 371 00:15:34,068 --> 00:15:35,298 I... I don't want to go to college. 372 00:15:35,339 --> 00:15:36,536 I hate school. 373 00:15:36,569 --> 00:15:37,767 I mean, I don't... I don't hate it. 374 00:15:37,800 --> 00:15:39,000 I'm just... I'm not good at it. 375 00:15:39,001 --> 00:15:40,874 - Well, who says you have to? - Well, I mean, ever since 376 00:15:40,907 --> 00:15:42,547 I was a kid I've seen these United Negro College Fund 377 00:15:42,580 --> 00:15:44,811 commercials, and it's, like, if you don't go to college, 378 00:15:44,844 --> 00:15:46,082 you're letting your whole family down, 379 00:15:46,115 --> 00:15:47,346 or you're destined for a life 380 00:15:47,379 --> 00:15:48,650 of eating out of Dumpsters or something. 381 00:15:48,683 --> 00:15:50,885 I don't know. So... please don't judge me. 382 00:15:50,918 --> 00:15:52,326 Look, in life, it's not about knowing what you want. 383 00:15:52,359 --> 00:15:53,623 It's about knowing what you can cross off your list 384 00:15:53,656 --> 00:15:54,758 that you don't want. 385 00:15:54,791 --> 00:15:56,293 But I do know what I want to do. 386 00:15:56,326 --> 00:15:58,724 I mean, it's been my dream since I was a kid. 387 00:15:58,765 --> 00:16:00,933 Male modeling is pretty much the ultimate form 388 00:16:00,966 --> 00:16:02,903 of self-expression as far as I'm concerned. 389 00:16:02,936 --> 00:16:05,070 It's like acting or singing, but the only tools 390 00:16:05,103 --> 00:16:06,501 you have to perform with are 391 00:16:06,532 --> 00:16:09,337 your striking good looks and great abs. 392 00:16:09,370 --> 00:16:10,875 There is some truth to that. 393 00:16:10,908 --> 00:16:12,308 All right, I have this vision. 394 00:16:12,341 --> 00:16:13,614 You know, it's just so clear in my head. 395 00:16:13,647 --> 00:16:15,750 I'm in Hollywood... and that's at one of those 396 00:16:15,783 --> 00:16:18,484 huge studios where they, uh, made Transformers and stuff. 397 00:16:18,517 --> 00:16:22,113 This bus pulls up, and there's a picture 398 00:16:22,146 --> 00:16:24,050 of me on it, and I'm in my underwear. 399 00:16:24,083 --> 00:16:25,450 Calvin Klein or something. 400 00:16:25,483 --> 00:16:27,660 My junk is as big as a car. 401 00:16:27,693 --> 00:16:29,893 And I look at it, and it's awesome. 402 00:16:29,926 --> 00:16:31,600 Hey, buddy? 403 00:16:31,633 --> 00:16:33,704 (speaking Spanish) 404 00:16:36,073 --> 00:16:38,102 You probably think I'm crazy, right? 405 00:16:38,135 --> 00:16:40,637 All right, eat up. 406 00:16:40,670 --> 00:16:42,373 You're gonna need your strength. We are gonna 407 00:16:42,406 --> 00:16:44,343 have a photo shoot here, and we're gonna get 408 00:16:44,376 --> 00:16:46,177 some modeling shots for you to show to agencies. 409 00:16:46,217 --> 00:16:47,512 Do you really think I could be a male model? 410 00:16:47,545 --> 00:16:50,119 Welcome to New York, the city where dreams come true. 411 00:16:54,886 --> 00:16:56,421 Quit stalking me, Abrams! 412 00:16:56,454 --> 00:16:59,126 Don't make me get a restraining order! 413 00:16:59,159 --> 00:17:00,623 I'm not stalking you. 414 00:17:00,664 --> 00:17:03,927 I just want you to chill out a second and listen to me. (Sighs) 415 00:17:03,968 --> 00:17:07,627 (Billy Joel's "Honesty" begins) 416 00:17:07,660 --> 00:17:11,435 ♪ If you search for tenderness ♪ 417 00:17:11,468 --> 00:17:14,374 ♪ It isn't hard to find ♪ 418 00:17:14,407 --> 00:17:19,581 ♪ You can have the love you need to live ♪ 419 00:17:22,013 --> 00:17:24,414 ♪ But if you look for truthfulness ♪ 420 00:17:24,447 --> 00:17:28,153 ♪ You might just as well be blind ♪ 421 00:17:28,194 --> 00:17:36,194 ♪ It always seems to be so hard to give ♪ 422 00:17:36,263 --> 00:17:43,001 ♪ Honesty is such a lonely word ♪ 423 00:17:43,042 --> 00:17:50,378 ♪ Everyone is so untrue ♪ 424 00:17:50,411 --> 00:17:56,947 ♪ Honesty is hardly ever heard ♪ 425 00:17:56,980 --> 00:18:03,022 ♪ And mostly what I need from you ♪ 426 00:18:03,055 --> 00:18:06,658 ♪ I can find a lover ♪ 427 00:18:06,691 --> 00:18:10,090 ♪ I can find a friend ♪ 428 00:18:10,124 --> 00:18:16,297 ♪ I can have security until the bitter end ♪ 429 00:18:16,330 --> 00:18:22,797 ♪ Anyone can comfort me with promises again ♪ 430 00:18:22,838 --> 00:18:26,471 ♪ I know ♪ 431 00:18:26,504 --> 00:18:31,279 ♪ I know, oh, oh, oh-oh ♪ 432 00:18:31,312 --> 00:18:34,778 ♪ Honesty ♪ 433 00:18:34,811 --> 00:18:37,918 ♪ Is such a lonely word ♪ 434 00:18:37,951 --> 00:18:43,992 ♪ Everyone is so untrue ♪ 435 00:18:45,096 --> 00:18:48,894 ♪ Honesty ♪ 436 00:18:48,927 --> 00:18:51,632 ♪ Is hardly ever heard ♪ 437 00:18:51,665 --> 00:18:59,665 ♪ And mostly what I need from you ♪ 438 00:19:03,716 --> 00:19:10,286 ♪ It's what I need from you. ♪ 439 00:19:10,319 --> 00:19:11,784 (song ends) 440 00:19:11,817 --> 00:19:13,551 Finally, you are telling the truth. 441 00:19:13,584 --> 00:19:16,254 You've been in love with me since kindergarten. 442 00:19:16,287 --> 00:19:17,923 I knew it all along. 443 00:19:17,956 --> 00:19:19,817 Band geeks, get lost! 444 00:19:19,858 --> 00:19:22,797 Artie is gonna show me his purple mushroom. 445 00:19:22,830 --> 00:19:24,462 No, Becky, you misunderstood. 446 00:19:24,495 --> 00:19:26,796 The song was just my way of telling you that 447 00:19:26,829 --> 00:19:30,002 you need to be honest with me, and honest with yourself. 448 00:19:30,035 --> 00:19:33,941 I think you want to go to college, but you're scared. 449 00:19:33,974 --> 00:19:36,076 And that's okay. I'm scared, too. 450 00:19:36,109 --> 00:19:37,475 I'm terrified of the whole thing. 451 00:19:37,508 --> 00:19:39,211 But the only way for us to grow 452 00:19:39,244 --> 00:19:42,348 is to face our fears and move forward. 453 00:19:42,382 --> 00:19:45,086 Am I right? Do you want to go to college? 454 00:19:45,119 --> 00:19:48,251 What if I go, and everybody makes fun of me again? 455 00:19:48,284 --> 00:19:50,983 What if everybody calls me stupid 456 00:19:51,016 --> 00:19:52,455 like they always used to? 457 00:19:52,489 --> 00:19:53,729 They won't, because you'll have 458 00:19:53,755 --> 00:19:55,027 all these awesome professors 459 00:19:55,060 --> 00:19:57,462 and counselors and new friends that'll have your back. 460 00:19:57,495 --> 00:19:58,862 And all your old friends will 461 00:19:58,903 --> 00:20:00,397 have your back, too. Like me. 462 00:20:00,430 --> 00:20:03,163 Are you really my friend? 463 00:20:03,204 --> 00:20:04,972 Always. 464 00:20:05,005 --> 00:20:07,005 Come here. 465 00:20:09,878 --> 00:20:11,244 (sighs) 466 00:20:15,076 --> 00:20:17,347 At first, I was just hurt and angry 467 00:20:17,380 --> 00:20:21,514 and embarrassed, because he turned out to be exactly 468 00:20:21,547 --> 00:20:24,006 what everyone said he was. 469 00:20:24,033 --> 00:20:26,730 And then, I was, like, "Okay, fine, it's over." 470 00:20:26,771 --> 00:20:29,540 But then, he's putting flowers in my locker, 471 00:20:29,573 --> 00:20:31,340 and then, he's singing "My Life" 472 00:20:31,373 --> 00:20:33,244 in Glee Club, like he's the victim. 473 00:20:33,277 --> 00:20:35,613 Mm. It's just all so schizo. 474 00:20:35,646 --> 00:20:37,878 And the worst part is, I still miss him. 475 00:20:37,919 --> 00:20:39,454 Oh, of course you do. 476 00:20:39,487 --> 00:20:41,486 And I hate it so much! 477 00:20:41,519 --> 00:20:43,885 Yeah. (sighs) 478 00:20:43,918 --> 00:20:45,895 Oh. 479 00:20:45,928 --> 00:20:47,560 I'm just glad we didn't end up... 480 00:20:47,593 --> 00:20:49,866 Doin' the humpty-hump? 481 00:20:49,899 --> 00:20:51,667 - Ooh. - Mom. 482 00:20:51,700 --> 00:20:53,336 (laughs) Mom! 483 00:20:53,369 --> 00:20:56,233 (laughing): Oh, my God, I'm scarred for life. 484 00:20:56,274 --> 00:20:57,441 Oh, Marley. 485 00:20:57,474 --> 00:20:59,274 (laughing) 486 00:20:59,307 --> 00:21:00,907 You know, when I was your age, 487 00:21:00,948 --> 00:21:02,646 I was... I was like a bad-boy magnet. 488 00:21:02,679 --> 00:21:04,519 Ooh! How do you think I met your dad? 489 00:21:04,552 --> 00:21:05,686 Mm. 490 00:21:05,719 --> 00:21:08,758 So, I know why you loved Jake. 491 00:21:08,791 --> 00:21:10,925 You know, but I am glad that you waited 492 00:21:10,957 --> 00:21:13,122 and dodged that bullet. 493 00:21:15,227 --> 00:21:17,626 You know, your first time is something 494 00:21:17,659 --> 00:21:19,396 that you can never get back, honey. 495 00:21:22,300 --> 00:21:25,172 You need to hold out for a good guy this time. 496 00:21:25,205 --> 00:21:27,838 You know, not just one you have feelings for, but 497 00:21:27,878 --> 00:21:29,743 someone you can trust. 498 00:21:29,776 --> 00:21:32,016 You know? 499 00:21:32,049 --> 00:21:33,648 Mmm. 500 00:21:33,681 --> 00:21:36,154 Okay, Sam Evans, this is Barbara Brownfield. 501 00:21:36,187 --> 00:21:38,187 She's our amazing photographer at Funny Girl. 502 00:21:38,221 --> 00:21:39,628 This is Sam Evans, 503 00:21:39,661 --> 00:21:42,320 my insanely handsome soon-to-be-supermodel friend. 504 00:21:42,360 --> 00:21:45,189 I'm not gonna lie. I'm really, really, really nervous. Uh, 505 00:21:45,222 --> 00:21:47,725 I've been pitting out all my T-shirts. Um, it's just like 506 00:21:47,758 --> 00:21:49,431 my entire future is in your hands. 507 00:21:49,464 --> 00:21:52,032 You know, just try to hide all my bad angles. 508 00:21:52,065 --> 00:21:53,302 What bad angles? 509 00:21:53,335 --> 00:21:55,037 (laughs) 510 00:21:55,071 --> 00:21:56,005 Excellent. 511 00:21:56,038 --> 00:21:57,470 I love what you're doing. Yep. 512 00:21:57,503 --> 00:21:58,838 (quietly): I'm feeling it. 513 00:21:58,871 --> 00:22:00,805 (shutter clicking) We got it. 514 00:22:00,838 --> 00:22:02,045 Great. 515 00:22:02,078 --> 00:22:03,340 You're waiting for the bus. 516 00:22:03,373 --> 00:22:05,338 Look for the bus. Oh, I love that. 517 00:22:05,379 --> 00:22:07,808 Hey, want a piece of this? Come on. How about 518 00:22:07,841 --> 00:22:10,373 you're so hot that you had to take some clothes off? 519 00:22:10,407 --> 00:22:11,844 Okay, strip it off. 520 00:22:11,877 --> 00:22:12,843 Come on, Sam. 521 00:22:12,876 --> 00:22:14,348 Yes! 522 00:22:14,381 --> 00:22:16,247 Okay, let me just put 523 00:22:16,280 --> 00:22:18,056 a little bit of this oil on you. 524 00:22:18,089 --> 00:22:19,520 Looking great. 525 00:22:20,521 --> 00:22:22,393 Okay. 526 00:22:22,426 --> 00:22:24,329 BARBARA: Flex, like... (grunts) 527 00:22:24,362 --> 00:22:25,561 Excellent. 528 00:22:25,594 --> 00:22:27,032 Yeah. Mm-hmm. 529 00:22:27,065 --> 00:22:28,528 BARBARA: There you go. 530 00:22:28,561 --> 00:22:30,568 Super. Thank you. 531 00:22:30,601 --> 00:22:31,936 We got it. 532 00:22:32,969 --> 00:22:35,439 Artie Abrams... 533 00:22:35,472 --> 00:22:37,574 (over speaker): wheel your butt 534 00:22:37,607 --> 00:22:40,145 into my office, now. 535 00:22:40,178 --> 00:22:42,442 ♪ 536 00:22:56,464 --> 00:22:59,433 I went to my pharmacy and took the liberty 537 00:22:59,474 --> 00:23:02,445 of purchasing you a good old-fashioned ear douche, 538 00:23:02,478 --> 00:23:05,045 because you obviously didn't hear me 539 00:23:05,078 --> 00:23:07,211 when I distinctly told you, 540 00:23:07,244 --> 00:23:10,516 with perfect diction and great clarity, 541 00:23:10,549 --> 00:23:12,854 to stop meddling in the affairs 542 00:23:12,887 --> 00:23:15,898 of one Becky Jackson. 543 00:23:16,996 --> 00:23:18,636 (pants) 544 00:23:18,669 --> 00:23:20,437 Principal Sylvester, Becky told me herself 545 00:23:20,470 --> 00:23:22,006 she wants to go to college, 546 00:23:22,039 --> 00:23:23,942 and there's no reason why she can't. 547 00:23:23,976 --> 00:23:25,511 How dare you lecture me. 548 00:23:25,544 --> 00:23:26,975 You don't think I know that? 549 00:23:27,016 --> 00:23:29,648 You don't think I've contacted each and every school 550 00:23:29,681 --> 00:23:32,252 and quizzed them endlessly about their programs? 551 00:23:32,293 --> 00:23:34,095 Then why aren't you helping her? 552 00:23:34,128 --> 00:23:36,560 Because she's not ready. Or maybe you're not ready. 553 00:23:36,601 --> 00:23:39,462 I know you love Becky like a daughter, and you want to protect her, 554 00:23:39,503 --> 00:23:41,566 and I get it, because of everything you've been through. 555 00:23:41,599 --> 00:23:43,303 But you have to let her go. 556 00:23:43,336 --> 00:23:45,871 There's a really good program for students with Down syndrome 557 00:23:45,904 --> 00:23:48,442 at the University of Cincinnati, and I'm gonna take her there 558 00:23:48,483 --> 00:23:51,050 for a tour. Her parents already gave me permission. 559 00:23:51,083 --> 00:23:53,714 It's only two hours from here, and it'd be really easy to visit. 560 00:23:54,755 --> 00:23:56,618 Mr. Abrams. 561 00:23:58,220 --> 00:24:00,324 Ask tough questions. 562 00:24:00,357 --> 00:24:02,662 Is there Wi-Fi on campus? 563 00:24:02,695 --> 00:24:05,670 Do all freshman gain 20 pounds from cafeteria food? 564 00:24:05,703 --> 00:24:08,040 I want a full report when you come back. 565 00:24:08,073 --> 00:24:09,937 (school bell ringing) 566 00:24:10,979 --> 00:24:12,980 Go out with me. 567 00:24:13,014 --> 00:24:14,814 Ryder... no. 568 00:24:14,854 --> 00:24:17,085 Look, I'm single, you're newly single... why not? 569 00:24:17,118 --> 00:24:19,317 I have good family values. I-I-I go to church. 570 00:24:19,358 --> 00:24:21,189 I've never been arrested. I'm not ugly. 571 00:24:21,222 --> 00:24:23,693 Now that I can read, I get good grades, and... 572 00:24:23,726 --> 00:24:25,957 I've always thought you were the most amazing girl 573 00:24:25,998 --> 00:24:27,597 in the history of the world. 574 00:24:27,630 --> 00:24:29,429 That's... 575 00:24:29,462 --> 00:24:31,429 really sweet. 576 00:24:31,470 --> 00:24:34,405 I just don't think I want to date anyone right now. 577 00:24:34,438 --> 00:24:36,302 What happened with Jake was really painful, 578 00:24:36,343 --> 00:24:39,172 and I need a little break from men. 579 00:24:39,205 --> 00:24:42,244 (sighs) Look, I'm a really, really good guy, Marley. 580 00:24:42,277 --> 00:24:43,675 I would never hurt you. 581 00:24:43,708 --> 00:24:46,413 All I need is a chance, and I swear I would 582 00:24:46,446 --> 00:24:49,549 never, ever do to you what he did. 583 00:24:49,582 --> 00:24:51,757 I'll think about it. 584 00:24:54,359 --> 00:24:57,831 ♪ Some people stay far away from the door ♪ 585 00:24:57,864 --> 00:25:01,829 ♪ If there's a chance of it opening up ♪ 586 00:25:03,166 --> 00:25:06,835 ♪ They hear a voice in the hall outside ♪ 587 00:25:06,868 --> 00:25:10,670 ♪ And hope that it just passes by ♪ 588 00:25:12,114 --> 00:25:15,546 ♪ Some people see through the eyes of the old ♪ 589 00:25:15,587 --> 00:25:19,417 ♪ Before they ever get a look at the young ♪ 590 00:25:21,092 --> 00:25:24,462 ♪ I'm only willing to hear you cry ♪ 591 00:25:24,495 --> 00:25:28,498 ♪ Because I am an innocent man... ♪ 592 00:25:32,236 --> 00:25:35,773 ♪ 593 00:25:35,806 --> 00:25:39,279 ♪ I am ♪ 594 00:25:39,312 --> 00:25:43,554 ♪ An innocent man ♪ 595 00:25:43,587 --> 00:25:46,788 ♪ Oh, yes, I am ♪ 596 00:25:49,890 --> 00:25:53,164 ♪ Some people sleep all alone every night ♪ 597 00:25:53,197 --> 00:25:56,208 ♪ Instead of taking a lover to bed ♪ 598 00:25:58,977 --> 00:26:02,211 ♪ Some people find that it's easier ♪ 599 00:26:02,244 --> 00:26:03,451 ♪ To hate ♪ 600 00:26:03,484 --> 00:26:05,686 ♪ Than to wait any more ♪ 601 00:26:07,728 --> 00:26:12,033 ♪ I know you don't want to hear what I say ♪ 602 00:26:12,067 --> 00:26:16,867 ♪ I know you're gonna keep turning away ♪ 603 00:26:16,908 --> 00:26:20,002 ♪ But I've been there, and if I can survive ♪ 604 00:26:20,043 --> 00:26:21,970 ♪ I can keep you alive ♪ 605 00:26:22,011 --> 00:26:25,674 ♪ I'm not above going through it again ♪ 606 00:26:27,748 --> 00:26:31,023 ♪ And although this is a fight I can lose ♪ 607 00:26:31,058 --> 00:26:32,394 ♪ The accused is ♪ 608 00:26:32,427 --> 00:26:34,794 ♪ An innocent man... ♪ 609 00:26:37,565 --> 00:26:39,573 ♪ I am... ♪ 610 00:26:41,468 --> 00:26:45,570 ♪ An innocent man ♪ 611 00:26:45,603 --> 00:26:47,611 ♪ Ooh, yes, I am... ♪ 612 00:26:49,917 --> 00:26:53,118 ♪ Oh, whoa-ho-ho... ♪ 613 00:26:56,256 --> 00:26:57,855 (song ends) 614 00:26:57,888 --> 00:27:00,094 Marley, will you go out with me? 615 00:27:00,127 --> 00:27:02,093 (sighs) 616 00:27:02,126 --> 00:27:03,557 Yes. 617 00:27:13,694 --> 00:27:16,262 Carmen Tibideaux is a classicist, so for your audition, 618 00:27:16,295 --> 00:27:18,263 let's try to avoid shocking patterns, 619 00:27:18,296 --> 00:27:19,936 and anything that says, "Look at me, 620 00:27:19,969 --> 00:27:22,643 I'm the center of attention, and this primary color proves it." 621 00:27:22,676 --> 00:27:24,538 Uh, Kurt... wait. 622 00:27:24,578 --> 00:27:25,576 Just stop. 623 00:27:25,609 --> 00:27:27,377 I have to tell you something. 624 00:27:27,410 --> 00:27:29,975 Oh, no. You've got that look. 625 00:27:30,008 --> 00:27:32,246 That look I saw the night after callbacks. 626 00:27:32,279 --> 00:27:33,510 If you cheated on me again, 627 00:27:33,551 --> 00:27:35,478 I will not accept sex addiction as an excuse. 628 00:27:35,519 --> 00:27:39,255 I... don't want to audition for NYADA. 629 00:27:39,288 --> 00:27:42,255 - Well, you can't get in on reputation alone. - No, NYADA is 630 00:27:42,288 --> 00:27:44,768 just a performing arts school... that's all you can study there. 631 00:27:44,792 --> 00:27:46,628 I have other passions, other... interests 632 00:27:46,661 --> 00:27:48,492 I might want to explore in college. 633 00:27:48,525 --> 00:27:50,661 - For instance? - I don't know. You know how much 634 00:27:50,694 --> 00:27:53,429 I love kids, and I'd love to be a teacher like Mr. Shue, or... 635 00:27:53,470 --> 00:27:54,733 or premed or something. 636 00:27:54,766 --> 00:27:57,069 Of course. How could I forget the numerous conversations 637 00:27:57,102 --> 00:27:59,942 - we've had about you wanting to be a doctor. - My passion 638 00:27:59,975 --> 00:28:01,975 for medicine has always been my secret shame. 639 00:28:02,008 --> 00:28:04,513 My first guy crush was... George Clooney, 640 00:28:04,548 --> 00:28:06,756 aka Dr. Ross, on ER. 641 00:28:06,789 --> 00:28:09,450 And it's no secret what my favorite Milton Bradley game is. 642 00:28:09,491 --> 00:28:11,922 Here goes his funny bone. 643 00:28:11,955 --> 00:28:14,090 (buzz) (quietly): Dang. 644 00:28:14,123 --> 00:28:17,329 It's a great relief to be able to tell you this now. 645 00:28:17,362 --> 00:28:19,996 I'm just glad I did it before my audition. 646 00:28:20,037 --> 00:28:21,237 What? 647 00:28:22,374 --> 00:28:24,404 We're getting married. 648 00:28:24,437 --> 00:28:25,404 I know you, 649 00:28:25,437 --> 00:28:26,837 and I get it, and this is 650 00:28:26,877 --> 00:28:30,475 a sweet side of you that I don't get to see very often. 651 00:28:30,508 --> 00:28:32,544 You're scared. 652 00:28:32,577 --> 00:28:34,943 Of what? Look, when I first moved here, 653 00:28:34,977 --> 00:28:37,312 I-I honestly felt like I was Crocodile Dundee. 654 00:28:37,345 --> 00:28:39,816 Right, the city's huge, the buildings are huge. 655 00:28:39,849 --> 00:28:42,050 And everywhere you look, it's, like, there's all these beautiful people 656 00:28:42,091 --> 00:28:44,051 who seem to have just come from some secret meeting 657 00:28:44,061 --> 00:28:46,325 where they teach you how to make it in the big city. 658 00:28:46,358 --> 00:28:49,027 What if I don't get in? You didn't. 659 00:28:49,060 --> 00:28:51,830 You will. And if you don't, it won't matter. 660 00:28:51,871 --> 00:28:54,706 You're a performer; you're gonna find the spotlight. 661 00:28:54,739 --> 00:28:56,677 And you can't shy away from your greatness 662 00:28:56,710 --> 00:28:58,581 just because you're afraid you're not great enough. 663 00:28:58,614 --> 00:29:00,887 You have a gift, and it wouldn't be right 664 00:29:00,920 --> 00:29:02,825 to let you hide that away. 665 00:29:02,858 --> 00:29:05,196 Thanks for knowing me. 666 00:29:05,229 --> 00:29:06,935 I love you. 667 00:29:06,968 --> 00:29:09,272 I love you, too. 668 00:29:10,737 --> 00:29:13,345 And we're in this together. 669 00:29:13,378 --> 00:29:15,612 I can't stop you from failing, but... 670 00:29:15,645 --> 00:29:19,055 I can promise to make it safe if you do. 671 00:29:19,088 --> 00:29:21,024 And I think Santana should do your makeup. 672 00:29:27,034 --> 00:29:28,402 WOMAN: Becky, our goal here 673 00:29:28,435 --> 00:29:29,802 at the University of Cincinnati 674 00:29:29,835 --> 00:29:31,202 is to make college life 675 00:29:31,235 --> 00:29:33,735 as inclusive as possible. 676 00:29:35,105 --> 00:29:37,608 This is one of our independent living classes. 677 00:29:37,641 --> 00:29:39,943 Students are working on bill paying 678 00:29:39,976 --> 00:29:42,573 and budgeting their money. 679 00:29:42,606 --> 00:29:44,709 Everybody, this is Becky Jackson. 680 00:29:44,742 --> 00:29:46,107 She's thinking of coming here. 681 00:29:46,148 --> 00:29:48,745 BOY: Don't. This place sucks. 682 00:29:48,778 --> 00:29:51,482 Just kidding. I love it here. 683 00:29:51,515 --> 00:29:53,685 (laughter) Whoo! 684 00:29:55,487 --> 00:29:56,826 Is that your boyfriend? 685 00:29:56,858 --> 00:29:59,930 Artie? Hell, no. He's got herpes. 686 00:29:59,963 --> 00:30:00,802 Ew. 687 00:30:00,835 --> 00:30:02,067 Just for the record, 688 00:30:02,100 --> 00:30:03,902 I don't have herpes. 689 00:30:03,943 --> 00:30:05,745 Becky, I think 690 00:30:05,778 --> 00:30:07,849 you're very funny, and very pretty. 691 00:30:07,882 --> 00:30:10,016 Tell me something I don't know. 692 00:30:10,049 --> 00:30:11,310 Oh, snap. 693 00:30:11,351 --> 00:30:12,445 (laughter) 694 00:30:12,478 --> 00:30:14,146 TEACHER: Becky, would you like 695 00:30:14,179 --> 00:30:16,980 to stay and watch the class for a while? BOY: Yeah. 696 00:30:17,021 --> 00:30:20,418 You can sit next to me. 697 00:30:22,019 --> 00:30:23,091 Okay. 698 00:30:23,124 --> 00:30:24,956 Whatever. 699 00:30:39,180 --> 00:30:40,683 So, how is your name pronounced again? 700 00:30:40,716 --> 00:30:41,979 Because I heard it was "Bee-shay," 701 00:30:42,020 --> 00:30:43,755 but now that I see it spelled out, 702 00:30:43,788 --> 00:30:45,355 it looks like it should be "Bitch-ette." 703 00:30:45,388 --> 00:30:46,754 Like a little mini bitch. 704 00:30:46,787 --> 00:30:48,690 Is that what your name means in French, 705 00:30:48,723 --> 00:30:49,891 or Italian, 706 00:30:49,924 --> 00:30:51,124 whatever it is? 707 00:30:51,157 --> 00:30:52,893 I'm... I tend to talk too much. 708 00:30:52,934 --> 00:30:55,100 I'm used to dealing with boys far prettier 709 00:30:55,133 --> 00:30:56,963 and considerably stupider than you. 710 00:30:56,996 --> 00:30:58,803 Oh, cool. Look, I agreed to meet with you 711 00:30:58,836 --> 00:31:00,235 because I trust Barb Brownfield's eye. 712 00:31:00,268 --> 00:31:03,911 And I must admit, I do respond to your look. 713 00:31:03,944 --> 00:31:07,680 Your Midwestern eyes have the vacant stare 714 00:31:07,713 --> 00:31:08,953 of a cow's. 715 00:31:08,986 --> 00:31:11,128 I don't have any of those on my roster. 716 00:31:11,156 --> 00:31:12,821 And you have a unique mouth. 717 00:31:12,861 --> 00:31:14,156 It's, like, your lips, 718 00:31:14,189 --> 00:31:17,088 they're kind of like... 719 00:31:17,121 --> 00:31:18,159 Trouty. 720 00:31:18,192 --> 00:31:19,526 Yes! That's it. 721 00:31:19,559 --> 00:31:20,861 Trouty mouth. 722 00:31:20,894 --> 00:31:22,664 Can I have, uh, one of these... 723 00:31:22,697 --> 00:31:23,832 No. 724 00:31:23,865 --> 00:31:25,464 So, this is how this works. 725 00:31:25,497 --> 00:31:26,697 These pictures... 726 00:31:26,738 --> 00:31:28,370 - Mm-hmm. - They're nice. 727 00:31:28,403 --> 00:31:29,772 But you need better. 728 00:31:29,805 --> 00:31:31,844 And you are gonna pay for those yourself. 729 00:31:31,877 --> 00:31:33,507 Wait, so are you saying you're gonna 730 00:31:33,548 --> 00:31:35,274 sign me? Because if you do, I swear, 731 00:31:35,315 --> 00:31:36,944 I won't let you down. I have been working, like, 732 00:31:36,977 --> 00:31:40,248 - my entire life on different poses... - Oh, slow down, Midnight Cowboy. 733 00:31:40,281 --> 00:31:42,553 Look, this is how male modeling works. 734 00:31:42,586 --> 00:31:44,154 Most of what you'll get will be runway, 735 00:31:44,187 --> 00:31:45,707 and you're not gonna get paid for that, 736 00:31:45,725 --> 00:31:47,628 but hopefully, they'll let you keep some of the clothes. 737 00:31:47,662 --> 00:31:50,693 Now, if you book print work, chances are 738 00:31:50,734 --> 00:31:52,765 you'll be a shirtless pawn, there to enhance 739 00:31:52,799 --> 00:31:55,468 the real gem of the shoot... the girl. 740 00:31:55,501 --> 00:31:57,207 You'll be paid enough to live in the city, 741 00:31:57,240 --> 00:31:58,472 with roommates. 742 00:31:58,505 --> 00:31:59,639 This is not glamorous. 743 00:31:59,672 --> 00:32:01,574 This is not what you think it is. 744 00:32:01,607 --> 00:32:03,078 You are one of 745 00:32:03,111 --> 00:32:05,310 10,000 beautiful boys here in New York City, 746 00:32:05,343 --> 00:32:07,214 and the word that you will hear 747 00:32:07,247 --> 00:32:09,551 more than any other during your brief 748 00:32:09,584 --> 00:32:10,921 career... 749 00:32:10,954 --> 00:32:13,628 will be... "no." 750 00:32:13,662 --> 00:32:15,325 Well, you know, like, dreams aren't easy, 751 00:32:15,366 --> 00:32:18,228 and, I mean, I come from a place where even the idea of sitting 752 00:32:18,269 --> 00:32:20,930 in this room with you would seem impossible. 753 00:32:20,963 --> 00:32:22,836 I mean, I know who I am, and... 754 00:32:22,869 --> 00:32:24,710 I know where I'm headed in life. 755 00:32:24,743 --> 00:32:26,974 I can take a few no's along the way. 756 00:32:27,007 --> 00:32:28,907 I do like you, Trouty Mouth. 757 00:32:28,940 --> 00:32:30,180 (giggles) Well, this is awesome. 758 00:32:30,211 --> 00:32:31,812 Okay, this is so awesome. I'll get those, 759 00:32:31,842 --> 00:32:34,681 - uh, pictures taken right away. - Uh, no, no, no, you won't. 760 00:32:34,714 --> 00:32:36,482 You're gonna have to wait at least a week. 761 00:32:36,515 --> 00:32:38,749 - You got to lose ten pounds. - Well, ten pounds doesn't really 762 00:32:38,790 --> 00:32:40,990 seem healthy to me... you think I'm... fat? 763 00:32:41,023 --> 00:32:42,021 Not for Kansas. 764 00:32:42,055 --> 00:32:43,859 - Ohio. - Look, you are 765 00:32:43,892 --> 00:32:45,825 in the big time now, cowboy. 766 00:32:45,858 --> 00:32:49,027 The camera likes... starvation. 767 00:32:52,667 --> 00:32:54,266 We don't have room for this. 768 00:32:54,307 --> 00:32:55,874 Uh, yes, we do. Right there. 769 00:32:55,907 --> 00:32:58,074 Okay, seriously, I'm not gonna be able to survive 770 00:32:58,107 --> 00:32:59,808 if you and your Hag Berry are gonna be 771 00:32:59,841 --> 00:33:02,272 tickling those ivories, belting out gay hits 772 00:33:02,313 --> 00:33:03,441 from Rent and Showboat all day. 773 00:33:03,482 --> 00:33:05,114 It's a thank you 774 00:33:05,147 --> 00:33:07,715 for allowing me and Sam to stay here. 775 00:33:07,748 --> 00:33:10,321 - Hey, you guys, I have some bread here if you want. - No can do. 776 00:33:10,354 --> 00:33:14,258 No, right now I'm just on this Mentos and flavored air diet. 777 00:33:14,291 --> 00:33:17,095 Sam, that's ridiculous. You don't need to lose ten pounds. 778 00:33:17,128 --> 00:33:18,399 Yeah, Sam, we all agree. 779 00:33:18,432 --> 00:33:20,270 You don't need to be prison-camp skinny to be a model. 780 00:33:20,303 --> 00:33:22,733 - I think you should find another agency. - No, 781 00:33:22,766 --> 00:33:24,867 House of Bichette is, like, the best agency in town. 782 00:33:24,900 --> 00:33:27,202 You know what I think? I think that this argument 783 00:33:27,235 --> 00:33:29,445 would be best made in a song. 784 00:33:29,478 --> 00:33:31,014 Yes. SANTANA: Oh, no. 785 00:33:31,047 --> 00:33:32,614 No, no, no, no, no. 786 00:33:32,647 --> 00:33:34,413 Do you see this? This is what's going 787 00:33:34,446 --> 00:33:36,443 to happen from every argument 788 00:33:36,484 --> 00:33:38,114 or discussion or meal from now on. 789 00:33:38,147 --> 00:33:40,147 It's gonna end in a freaking sing-along. 790 00:33:40,188 --> 00:33:42,487 It's bad enough we need to be singing waiters, okay? 791 00:33:42,528 --> 00:33:44,689 I can't have this in my home. I need my peaceful place. 792 00:33:44,695 --> 00:33:46,659 You don't have to sing, Santana. (Billy Joel's "Just the Way You Are" begins) 793 00:33:46,692 --> 00:33:48,196 But I dare you not to. 794 00:33:49,662 --> 00:33:53,169 ♪ Don't go changin' ♪ 795 00:33:53,202 --> 00:33:56,336 ♪ To try and please me ♪ 796 00:33:57,304 --> 00:34:01,611 ♪ You never let me down before ♪ 797 00:34:01,642 --> 00:34:04,283 ♪ Mmm, mmm ♪ 798 00:34:04,316 --> 00:34:07,450 ♪ Don't imagine ♪ 799 00:34:07,483 --> 00:34:11,552 ♪ You're too familiar ♪ 800 00:34:11,585 --> 00:34:17,135 ♪ And I don't see you anymore ♪ 801 00:34:17,168 --> 00:34:21,531 ♪ I would not leave you ♪ 802 00:34:21,564 --> 00:34:25,139 ♪ In times of trouble ♪ 803 00:34:25,173 --> 00:34:30,384 ♪ No, we never could have come this far ♪ 804 00:34:30,417 --> 00:34:33,282 ♪ Ooh ♪ 805 00:34:33,323 --> 00:34:36,927 BLAINE/RACHEL: ♪ I took the good times ♪ 806 00:34:36,960 --> 00:34:40,932 ♪ I'll take the bad times ♪ 807 00:34:40,965 --> 00:34:45,702 ♪ I'll take you just the way you are ♪ 808 00:34:45,736 --> 00:34:49,010 ♪ I don't ♪ 809 00:34:49,043 --> 00:34:52,252 ♪ Want clever ♪ 810 00:34:52,285 --> 00:34:55,191 ♪ Conversation ♪ 811 00:34:55,224 --> 00:34:56,720 ♪ I never ♪ 812 00:34:56,761 --> 00:35:00,190 ♪ Want to work that hard ♪ 813 00:35:00,223 --> 00:35:02,923 ♪ Mmm ♪ 814 00:35:02,956 --> 00:35:06,566 KURT/SAM: ♪ I just want someone ♪ 815 00:35:06,599 --> 00:35:09,642 ♪ That I can talk to ♪ 816 00:35:09,675 --> 00:35:12,243 ♪ I want you just ♪ 817 00:35:12,276 --> 00:35:17,813 ALL: ♪ The way you are ♪ 818 00:35:17,854 --> 00:35:24,789 ♪ I need to know that you will always be ♪ 819 00:35:24,822 --> 00:35:30,065 ♪ The same old someone that I knew ♪ 820 00:35:30,098 --> 00:35:31,601 SANTANA/SAM: ♪ Oh ♪ 821 00:35:31,634 --> 00:35:33,600 ♪ What will it take ♪ 822 00:35:33,634 --> 00:35:39,147 ♪ Till you believe in me ♪ 823 00:35:39,180 --> 00:35:41,978 ♪ The way that I believe ♪ 824 00:35:42,011 --> 00:35:44,711 ♪ In you? ♪ 825 00:35:44,744 --> 00:35:49,520 KURT/BLAINE: ♪ I said I love you ♪ 826 00:35:49,553 --> 00:35:52,388 ♪ That's forever ♪ 827 00:35:52,429 --> 00:35:54,492 ♪ Forever ♪ 828 00:35:54,525 --> 00:35:58,561 ♪ And this I promise from the heart ♪ 829 00:35:58,594 --> 00:36:01,929 ♪ Mmm, mmm ♪ 830 00:36:01,970 --> 00:36:05,270 SAM/RACHEL: ♪ I couldn't love you ♪ 831 00:36:05,311 --> 00:36:08,816 ♪ Any better ♪ 832 00:36:08,849 --> 00:36:13,120 ALL: ♪ I love you just the way you are... ♪ 833 00:36:13,153 --> 00:36:16,386 ♪ I love you just the way ♪ 834 00:36:16,427 --> 00:36:19,827 ♪ I love you just the way ♪ 835 00:36:19,860 --> 00:36:27,860 ♪ I love you just the way you are. ♪ 836 00:36:32,704 --> 00:36:34,672 (school bell rings) Good night, Coach. 837 00:36:34,705 --> 00:36:36,177 That's it? 838 00:36:36,210 --> 00:36:38,680 Don't let the bed bugs bite? 839 00:36:38,713 --> 00:36:41,280 You've been sitting out there all day long 840 00:36:41,313 --> 00:36:42,745 with little dream bubbles 841 00:36:42,786 --> 00:36:44,652 floating over your head 842 00:36:44,685 --> 00:36:45,925 and not once have you come in here 843 00:36:45,959 --> 00:36:48,423 to tell me how your trip to college went. 844 00:36:48,463 --> 00:36:51,358 I don't want to hurt your feelings, Coach. 845 00:36:51,399 --> 00:36:52,526 I don't have 846 00:36:52,567 --> 00:36:54,029 any feelings, Becky. 847 00:36:54,062 --> 00:36:55,533 It was okay, I guess. 848 00:36:55,566 --> 00:36:57,531 I don't have to take math. 849 00:36:57,564 --> 00:36:59,699 Someone takes notes for me. 850 00:36:59,732 --> 00:37:01,937 I can learn photography. 851 00:37:01,970 --> 00:37:03,936 Well, that sounds better than okay to me. 852 00:37:03,969 --> 00:37:05,472 To tell you the truth, 853 00:37:05,505 --> 00:37:07,411 it was awesome. 854 00:37:07,444 --> 00:37:10,782 (clicks tongue) Are you sure you're ready for this, honey? 855 00:37:10,815 --> 00:37:12,980 I never thought to say this. 856 00:37:13,013 --> 00:37:17,249 I've outgrown these... high school bitches. 857 00:37:17,282 --> 00:37:19,052 Mmm. 858 00:37:19,085 --> 00:37:21,727 You're not sad, are you, Coach? 859 00:37:21,760 --> 00:37:24,728 I'm sad to be losing the best damn secretary 860 00:37:24,769 --> 00:37:26,797 since the pre-collagen injected Melanie Griffith 861 00:37:26,830 --> 00:37:28,627 in Working Girl. 862 00:37:28,660 --> 00:37:30,035 (sighs) 863 00:37:30,068 --> 00:37:32,269 But I'm more proud than I am sad. 864 00:37:32,302 --> 00:37:34,239 Think I can help you 865 00:37:34,272 --> 00:37:36,072 write your application essay? 866 00:37:36,113 --> 00:37:37,776 Sure, Coach. 867 00:37:37,809 --> 00:37:39,941 Let's see what you got there. 868 00:37:39,975 --> 00:37:42,614 (sighs) 869 00:37:42,647 --> 00:37:45,119 Okay, well, you can't say that. 870 00:37:45,152 --> 00:37:46,456 And you can't say that. 871 00:37:46,489 --> 00:37:48,457 I can't say "crap" or "douche"? 872 00:37:48,490 --> 00:37:50,486 Even if you're talking about Graydon Carter. 873 00:37:54,363 --> 00:37:56,626 (school bell rings) (clears throat) 874 00:37:56,667 --> 00:37:58,232 Check your Instagram. 875 00:37:58,265 --> 00:38:00,262 O... kay. 876 00:38:05,875 --> 00:38:08,307 (chuckles) 877 00:38:08,340 --> 00:38:09,840 When did you do all that? 878 00:38:09,873 --> 00:38:11,777 Uh, last night. After I dropped you off. 879 00:38:11,810 --> 00:38:13,513 I kind of couldn't stop thinking about you. 880 00:38:13,546 --> 00:38:14,977 Oh... 881 00:38:15,018 --> 00:38:16,849 Look, I don't want to freak you out and move too fast 882 00:38:16,882 --> 00:38:18,783 or anything, but I'd love to do it again. 883 00:38:18,816 --> 00:38:20,046 Like, maybe tonight? 884 00:38:20,087 --> 00:38:24,052 So, you guys are, like, really a thing now? 885 00:38:24,085 --> 00:38:25,253 Yeah? 886 00:38:25,285 --> 00:38:27,691 It's, uh, none of your business anymore. 887 00:38:31,423 --> 00:38:32,287 Cool. 888 00:38:32,320 --> 00:38:33,856 Well, 889 00:38:33,889 --> 00:38:35,625 congratulations. 890 00:38:35,658 --> 00:38:36,866 Duty calls. 891 00:38:38,500 --> 00:38:40,802 Okay, if I'm going to be honest here, 892 00:38:40,835 --> 00:38:43,305 just because we go out once doesn't mean that we're... 893 00:38:43,339 --> 00:38:44,907 going out. 894 00:38:44,940 --> 00:38:46,372 Oh. 895 00:38:46,405 --> 00:38:48,076 I still just need time for me. 896 00:38:48,109 --> 00:38:49,446 Sure. 897 00:38:52,914 --> 00:38:54,208 Are we done, Coach? 898 00:38:54,249 --> 00:38:55,848 Oh, not quite yet, Becky. 899 00:38:55,881 --> 00:38:57,785 We're gonna drench this whole thing in glitter and hoist 900 00:38:57,818 --> 00:38:59,354 three dozen rainbow flags. 901 00:38:59,387 --> 00:39:01,290 Got it, Coach. Go Bearcats! 902 00:39:01,323 --> 00:39:02,687 Go Bearcats. 903 00:39:02,720 --> 00:39:04,422 So you finally came around. 904 00:39:04,455 --> 00:39:05,916 What made you see the light? 905 00:39:05,957 --> 00:39:08,086 Well, Butt Chin, in the words of Civil Rights leader. 906 00:39:08,126 --> 00:39:10,560 Genghis Khan, everyone deserves a shot 907 00:39:10,593 --> 00:39:13,159 at their dreams, and I suppose that includes 908 00:39:13,200 --> 00:39:16,333 your hopelessly misguided teen hobgoblins. 909 00:39:16,366 --> 00:39:19,034 Now, don't forget to remind them about the myriad 910 00:39:19,067 --> 00:39:22,373 of show business legends born and bred right here in Lima. 911 00:39:22,406 --> 00:39:24,110 And that would be a total of one, 912 00:39:24,143 --> 00:39:26,037 Ms. Phyllis Diller. 913 00:39:26,078 --> 00:39:29,075 You know, in a few decades, when the New Directions are all 914 00:39:29,108 --> 00:39:31,275 on unemployment and sexually pleasing 915 00:39:31,308 --> 00:39:34,014 some horny old casting assistant just so they can be extras 916 00:39:34,047 --> 00:39:36,150 on season 33 of The Bachelorette, 917 00:39:36,183 --> 00:39:39,484 they'll look back on this time and remember you fondly. 918 00:39:39,517 --> 00:39:40,853 TINA: That's not true, Sue Sylvester! 919 00:39:40,886 --> 00:39:42,357 One day, we're gonna be big, big stars. 920 00:39:42,390 --> 00:39:45,029 SUE: Well, of course you are, my dear. 921 00:39:45,062 --> 00:39:46,029 Isn't that right, William? 922 00:39:46,062 --> 00:39:46,997 Blam! 923 00:39:47,030 --> 00:39:48,534 They're back! ARTIE: Yo, dawgs, 924 00:39:48,567 --> 00:39:50,030 tell us everything. SAM: Fact: 925 00:39:50,063 --> 00:39:51,535 Blaine thought he wanted to be a doctor for a minute 926 00:39:51,568 --> 00:39:53,010 and then Kurt talked him out of it 927 00:39:53,043 --> 00:39:54,844 and then he went to NYADA and he crushed his NYADA audition. 928 00:39:54,877 --> 00:39:56,012 Sam, that was my news. 929 00:39:56,045 --> 00:39:57,412 Oh, and, uh, Mr. Shue, did you know 930 00:39:57,445 --> 00:39:59,148 that Billy Joel never went to college? 931 00:39:59,181 --> 00:40:01,250 Fact: he didn't, and I think you forgot to tell us 932 00:40:01,283 --> 00:40:03,419 about that. So I'm gonna skip college, too, 933 00:40:03,452 --> 00:40:05,958 - and become a male model. - Impossible. You're too fat. 934 00:40:05,991 --> 00:40:08,023 No, I'm not. And I don't care what you or Ms. Bichette 935 00:40:08,063 --> 00:40:09,263 or anyone says. 936 00:40:09,296 --> 00:40:11,296 I like me just the way I am, and I'm not gonna 937 00:40:11,329 --> 00:40:12,867 - change for anyone. - Well, that is 938 00:40:12,900 --> 00:40:15,804 just the screw-you spirit employers love. 939 00:40:15,837 --> 00:40:18,972 Honest to God, I cannot imagine what goes on 940 00:40:19,013 --> 00:40:21,983 in your lumpish, sexually ambiguous heads. 941 00:40:22,016 --> 00:40:23,384 'Cause they're nuts. 942 00:40:23,417 --> 00:40:24,522 Every one of them 943 00:40:24,555 --> 00:40:25,692 is crazy! 944 00:40:25,727 --> 00:40:26,687 Becky, you may be right. 945 00:40:27,399 --> 00:40:29,326 - We may be crazy. - Oh, no, 946 00:40:29,367 --> 00:40:30,462 no, no, no. Don't you dare. 947 00:40:30,495 --> 00:40:32,231 Over my dead body will you inexplicably 948 00:40:32,264 --> 00:40:34,001 shoehorn in another Billy Joel song 949 00:40:34,042 --> 00:40:35,970 just to punctuate one of your weekly lessons 950 00:40:36,011 --> 00:40:39,042 that inevitably veers off into a saccharine barrage of angst 951 00:40:39,075 --> 00:40:41,681 and affirmation. (Billy Joel's "You May Be Right" begins) 952 00:40:41,714 --> 00:40:44,819 (cheering) 953 00:40:46,187 --> 00:40:49,889 ♪ Friday night I crashed your party ♪ 954 00:40:49,922 --> 00:40:53,093 ♪ Saturday I said I'm sorry ♪ 955 00:40:53,126 --> 00:40:57,136 ♪ Sunday came and trashed me out again ♪ 956 00:40:58,968 --> 00:41:02,405 ARTIE/KITTY: ♪ And you told me not to drive ♪ 957 00:41:02,438 --> 00:41:05,174 ♪ But I made it home alive ♪ 958 00:41:05,207 --> 00:41:07,776 ♪ So you said that only proves ♪ 959 00:41:07,817 --> 00:41:10,080 ♪ That I'm insane ♪ 960 00:41:10,113 --> 00:41:14,116 ALL: ♪ You may be right ♪ 961 00:41:14,149 --> 00:41:17,388 ♪ I may be crazy ♪ 962 00:41:17,421 --> 00:41:21,056 ♪ But it just may be a lunatic ♪ 963 00:41:21,097 --> 00:41:23,831 ♪ You're looking for ♪ 964 00:41:23,864 --> 00:41:26,832 ♪ Turn out the light ♪ 965 00:41:26,865 --> 00:41:29,402 ♪ Don't try to save me ♪ 966 00:41:29,435 --> 00:41:31,446 ♪ You may be wrong ♪ 967 00:41:31,479 --> 00:41:34,912 ♪ For all I know, but you may be right ♪ 968 00:41:34,945 --> 00:41:36,954 (whooping) 969 00:41:39,822 --> 00:41:43,831 ♪ Now think of all the years you tried to ♪ 970 00:41:43,864 --> 00:41:47,000 JAKE/RYDER: ♪ Find someone to satisfy you ♪ 971 00:41:47,033 --> 00:41:52,809 ♪ I might be as crazy as you say ♪ 972 00:41:52,842 --> 00:41:55,913 KITTY/ARTIE: ♪ If I'm crazy then it's true ♪ 973 00:41:55,946 --> 00:41:58,513 ♪ That it's all because of you ♪ 974 00:41:58,546 --> 00:42:02,878 ♪ And you wouldn't want me any other ♪ 975 00:42:02,919 --> 00:42:04,748 ♪ Way ♪ 976 00:42:04,781 --> 00:42:07,650 ALL: ♪ You may be right ♪ 977 00:42:07,683 --> 00:42:11,190 ♪ I may be crazy ♪ 978 00:42:11,223 --> 00:42:15,357 ♪ Oh, but it just may be a lunatic ♪ 979 00:42:15,397 --> 00:42:17,732 ♪ You're looking for ♪ 980 00:42:17,765 --> 00:42:21,000 ♪ It's too late to fight ♪ 981 00:42:21,033 --> 00:42:24,409 ♪ It's too late to change me ♪ 982 00:42:24,442 --> 00:42:27,240 ♪ You may be wrong for all I know ♪ 983 00:42:27,273 --> 00:42:30,052 ♪ But you may be right ♪ 984 00:42:30,085 --> 00:42:33,918 ♪ You may be right ♪ You may be right ♪ 985 00:42:33,959 --> 00:42:36,754 ♪ I may be crazy ♪ I may be crazy ♪ 986 00:42:36,788 --> 00:42:40,291 ♪ Hey, but it just may be a lunatic ♪ 987 00:42:40,324 --> 00:42:43,263 ♪ You're looking for ♪ 988 00:42:43,296 --> 00:42:46,505 ♪ Turn out the light ♪ ♪ Turn out the light ♪ 989 00:42:46,538 --> 00:42:49,610 ♪ Oh, don't try to save me ♪ ♪ No, no, no, no ♪ 990 00:42:49,643 --> 00:42:52,816 ♪ You may be wrong for all I know ♪ 991 00:42:52,848 --> 00:42:54,257 ♪ You may be right ♪ 992 00:42:55,857 --> 00:42:58,685 ♪ You may be wrong ♪ ♪ You may be wrong ♪ 993 00:42:58,718 --> 00:43:00,326 ♪ But you may be right ♪ ♪ You may be ♪ 994 00:43:00,359 --> 00:43:01,759 ♪ Wrong ♪ ♪ You may be wrong ♪ 995 00:43:01,792 --> 00:43:03,994 ♪ But you may be right ♪ ♪ You may be wrong ♪ 996 00:43:04,035 --> 00:43:06,868 ♪ You may be wrong but you may be right ♪ ♪ Hey, you may be wrong ♪ 997 00:43:06,901 --> 00:43:09,235 ♪ You may be wrong but you may be right... ♪ 998 00:43:09,253 --> 00:43:12,744 Sync & corrections by wilson0804 www.Addic7ed.com