1 00:02:22,225 --> 00:02:26,225 On the 12th hour of the first day of October 1989, 2 00:02:26,312 --> 00:02:29,232 43 women around the world gave birth. 3 00:02:29,315 --> 00:02:31,185 This was unusual only in the fact 4 00:02:31,276 --> 00:02:35,156 that none of these women had been pregnant when the day first began. 5 00:02:36,573 --> 00:02:40,993 Sir Reginald Hargreeves, eccentric billionaire and adventurer, 6 00:02:41,077 --> 00:02:44,907 resolved to locate and adopt as many of the children as possible. 7 00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:46,328 Extraordinary! 8 00:02:51,129 --> 00:02:52,379 How much do you want for it? 9 00:05:10,226 --> 00:05:12,556 Show me where the safe is, or your family's dead! 10 00:05:13,062 --> 00:05:14,732 Where's the safe? 11 00:05:14,814 --> 00:05:16,404 Just leave us alone! 12 00:05:16,482 --> 00:05:20,652 ...little bit of rain potentially, later in the week. 13 00:05:27,869 --> 00:05:29,119 Who is this guy? 14 00:05:48,139 --> 00:05:49,599 Over here, over here! 15 00:05:59,942 --> 00:06:01,742 There's our sweetheart, Allison! 16 00:06:10,661 --> 00:06:11,791 Oh! You're perfect! 17 00:06:20,421 --> 00:06:22,511 Hey, you, stay strong. 18 00:06:22,590 --> 00:06:24,220 I believe in you. Okay? 19 00:06:24,300 --> 00:06:25,470 You, not so much. 20 00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:28,300 Bye, Klaus. 21 00:06:35,103 --> 00:06:36,563 We'll see you soon, Klaus. 22 00:06:40,066 --> 00:06:42,356 - Stay sober. - Mm. 23 00:07:08,928 --> 00:07:11,848 Incoming transmission. 24 00:07:34,829 --> 00:07:36,709 Your family is safe now. 25 00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:46,014 We're going now live to a breaking story. 26 00:07:48,217 --> 00:07:50,177 - One more! - Allison, here! 27 00:07:53,097 --> 00:07:54,927 Al... Allison, Allison! 28 00:07:55,433 --> 00:07:57,813 - Allison! - Allison! Have you heard the news? 29 00:07:58,019 --> 00:08:00,059 When was the last time you saw your father? 30 00:08:00,146 --> 00:08:02,186 Have you heard from your brothers? 31 00:08:03,983 --> 00:08:06,193 Allison, will you wear Valentino to the funeral? 32 00:08:48,569 --> 00:08:49,569 Moments ago, 33 00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:51,664 police reported the death of the most eccentric 34 00:08:51,739 --> 00:08:53,159 and reclusive billionaire. 35 00:09:42,999 --> 00:09:44,039 Dad... 36 00:11:54,338 --> 00:11:55,338 Hey, Mom. 37 00:11:59,969 --> 00:12:00,969 Mom? 38 00:12:04,265 --> 00:12:05,385 Vanya? 39 00:12:06,142 --> 00:12:07,812 You're actually here. 40 00:12:10,312 --> 00:12:12,232 - Hey, Allison. - Hey, sis. 41 00:12:23,075 --> 00:12:25,075 Ah. What is she doing here? 42 00:12:25,494 --> 00:12:27,714 You don't belong here. Not after what you did. 43 00:12:27,788 --> 00:12:29,998 You're seriously gonna do this today? 44 00:12:31,667 --> 00:12:33,687 Way to dress for the occasion, by the way. 45 00:12:33,711 --> 00:12:35,421 At least I'm wearing black. 46 00:12:37,339 --> 00:12:39,219 You know what? I... Maybe he's right. 47 00:12:39,300 --> 00:12:41,260 - And I shouldn't... - Forget about him. 48 00:12:42,344 --> 00:12:43,554 I'm glad you're here. 49 00:13:21,467 --> 00:13:22,787 I can save you some time. 50 00:13:23,803 --> 00:13:24,973 They're all locked. 51 00:13:25,554 --> 00:13:28,524 No forced entry, no sign of struggle. 52 00:13:29,016 --> 00:13:30,426 Nothing out of the ordinary. 53 00:13:33,395 --> 00:13:36,565 Oh, you got big, Luther. 54 00:13:38,651 --> 00:13:40,901 What's the secret, huh? Protein shakes? 55 00:13:41,445 --> 00:13:42,445 Low carbs? 56 00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:43,655 What do you want? 57 00:13:48,327 --> 00:13:49,537 The autopsy report. 58 00:13:51,497 --> 00:13:52,497 Ah. 59 00:13:55,709 --> 00:13:56,879 And you have this why? 60 00:13:57,211 --> 00:14:00,971 Well, that's because I... broke into the coroner's office. 61 00:14:01,048 --> 00:14:04,798 And surprise, surprise, Dad's death was... normal. 62 00:14:05,928 --> 00:14:07,888 Just a boring, old heart failure. 63 00:14:09,598 --> 00:14:10,598 Yeah, so? 64 00:14:10,683 --> 00:14:12,433 So, why are you in here, 65 00:14:13,310 --> 00:14:14,480 checking all the windows? 66 00:14:14,937 --> 00:14:17,607 - Were you the first one on the scene? - Pogo found him. 67 00:14:17,898 --> 00:14:21,488 Yeah, I talked to Pogo. He said he couldn't find Dad's monocle. 68 00:14:21,569 --> 00:14:23,149 And your point being? 69 00:14:23,237 --> 00:14:26,317 Can you think of a single time you saw Dad and he wasn't wearing that monocle? 70 00:14:27,449 --> 00:14:29,659 No. Which means someone took it. 71 00:14:29,743 --> 00:14:32,203 Which means there's a chance he wasn't alone when he died. 72 00:14:32,621 --> 00:14:35,711 There is no mystery here. Nothing to avenge. 73 00:14:35,791 --> 00:14:37,631 Nothing to solve, nothing like that. 74 00:14:37,918 --> 00:14:40,918 It's just a sad old man who kicked it 75 00:14:41,005 --> 00:14:42,545 in a big, empty house. 76 00:14:43,507 --> 00:14:45,887 Just like he deserved. 77 00:14:46,343 --> 00:14:47,343 You should leave. 78 00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:51,101 Whatever you say, brother. 79 00:15:48,238 --> 00:15:50,278 Welcome home, Ms. Vanya. 80 00:15:50,658 --> 00:15:51,658 Pogo. 81 00:15:56,705 --> 00:15:57,705 Hmm. 82 00:16:00,417 --> 00:16:02,747 So good to see you. 83 00:16:05,339 --> 00:16:07,759 Ah, yes, your autobiography. 84 00:16:08,217 --> 00:16:09,257 Do you know, um... 85 00:16:12,221 --> 00:16:13,351 Did he ever read it? 86 00:16:13,931 --> 00:16:14,931 Hmm... 87 00:16:16,016 --> 00:16:17,686 Not that I'm aware of. 88 00:16:24,024 --> 00:16:26,614 How long has it been since Five disappeared? 89 00:16:27,861 --> 00:16:31,621 It's been 16 years, four months, and 14 days. 90 00:16:33,659 --> 00:16:35,789 Your father insisted I keep track. 91 00:16:37,287 --> 00:16:38,957 You wanna know something stupid? 92 00:16:39,665 --> 00:16:41,995 I always used to leave the lights on for him. 93 00:16:43,168 --> 00:16:45,338 I was scared that he would come back, 94 00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:48,048 it would be late, and the house would be dark 95 00:16:48,132 --> 00:16:50,802 and he wouldn't be able to find us, so he'd leave again. 96 00:16:51,385 --> 00:16:53,885 So, every night I'd make a little snack 97 00:16:53,971 --> 00:16:56,141 and make sure all the lights were on. 98 00:16:56,223 --> 00:16:57,773 Oh, I remember your snacks. 99 00:16:58,392 --> 00:17:01,152 I'm pretty sure I stepped in half those peanut butter 100 00:17:01,228 --> 00:17:02,688 and marshmallow sandwiches. 101 00:17:06,900 --> 00:17:10,740 Your father always believed 102 00:17:10,821 --> 00:17:13,491 that Number Five was still out there somewhere. 103 00:17:13,991 --> 00:17:15,371 He never lost hope. 104 00:17:16,201 --> 00:17:17,751 And look where that got him. 105 00:17:34,428 --> 00:17:37,768 The children are ready for bed, sir. They wanted to say goodnight. 106 00:17:56,533 --> 00:17:59,753 Okay! Time for bed now, kids. Come along now. 107 00:18:00,537 --> 00:18:01,617 Come along now. 108 00:18:03,457 --> 00:18:05,787 Come along now, Allison, your father's busy. 109 00:18:05,876 --> 00:18:07,496 He's always busy. 110 00:18:12,132 --> 00:18:15,592 Where's the cash, Dad? 111 00:18:19,515 --> 00:18:20,965 Where's the cash? 112 00:18:24,812 --> 00:18:26,692 Klaus? What are you doing in here? 113 00:18:26,772 --> 00:18:28,982 Oh! Allison! 114 00:18:29,525 --> 00:18:31,435 Wow, is that you? 115 00:18:32,736 --> 00:18:34,696 Hey, come here. 116 00:18:34,780 --> 00:18:35,910 Long time. 117 00:18:36,365 --> 00:18:39,615 Too long. Hey, I was hoping to see you, actually, 118 00:18:39,701 --> 00:18:42,701 because I wanted to get your autograph. 119 00:18:42,788 --> 00:18:44,708 Add it to my collection! 120 00:18:46,375 --> 00:18:49,415 - Just out of rehab? - No, no. No, no, no, no. 121 00:18:49,503 --> 00:18:52,093 No. I'm done with all that. 122 00:18:52,172 --> 00:18:54,132 I just came down here to prove to myself 123 00:18:54,550 --> 00:18:57,640 that the old man was really gone. 124 00:18:59,263 --> 00:19:02,683 And he is! He's dead. Yeah! 125 00:19:02,766 --> 00:19:05,136 You know how I know? Because if he were alive, 126 00:19:05,227 --> 00:19:09,727 not one of us would be allowed to set foot in this room. 127 00:19:10,774 --> 00:19:12,734 He was always in here, our whole childhood, 128 00:19:12,818 --> 00:19:15,858 plotting his next torment, right? 129 00:19:15,946 --> 00:19:19,196 Remember how he used to look at us? That scowl? 130 00:19:19,867 --> 00:19:21,987 Thank Christ he's not our real father 131 00:19:22,077 --> 00:19:24,957 so we couldn't inherit those cold, dead eyes! 132 00:19:27,332 --> 00:19:30,052 - Number Three! - Get out of his chair. 133 00:19:31,420 --> 00:19:33,380 Oh, wow, Luther! 134 00:19:33,463 --> 00:19:34,513 Wow, you really, uh... 135 00:19:35,757 --> 00:19:37,507 You really filled out over the years, huh? 136 00:19:37,593 --> 00:19:40,643 - Klaus. - Save the lecture. I was already leaving. 137 00:19:41,638 --> 00:19:46,058 You guys can talk amongst yourselves. 138 00:19:46,518 --> 00:19:48,188 - Drop it. - Ex-squeeze me? 139 00:19:48,854 --> 00:19:50,404 Do it. Now. 140 00:19:53,775 --> 00:19:55,815 All right. All right. 141 00:19:56,320 --> 00:20:00,570 It's just an advance on our inheritance! 142 00:20:01,033 --> 00:20:02,283 That's all it is. 143 00:20:04,036 --> 00:20:06,706 No need to get your little panties in a bunch. 144 00:20:20,093 --> 00:20:22,723 Ah. 145 00:20:23,013 --> 00:20:26,313 So, Klaus is still Klaus, in case you were wondering. 146 00:20:26,642 --> 00:20:29,902 You know, after all these years, I find it strangely comforting. 147 00:20:30,896 --> 00:20:32,266 Did you see Diego? 148 00:20:32,564 --> 00:20:34,484 - With his stupid outfit? - Oh, I know. 149 00:20:34,566 --> 00:20:36,606 Do you think he wears that thing in the bathroom? 150 00:20:36,693 --> 00:20:38,363 - Like in the shower? - Yeah. 151 00:20:38,445 --> 00:20:39,815 Yes, absolutely! 152 00:20:46,495 --> 00:20:49,285 I, uh... I wasn't sure you'd come. 153 00:20:51,541 --> 00:20:52,671 Me neither. 154 00:20:53,794 --> 00:20:54,794 You look great. 155 00:20:58,257 --> 00:20:59,257 Thanks. 156 00:21:00,384 --> 00:21:02,514 Where's Patrick and Claire? 157 00:21:02,594 --> 00:21:05,514 Patrick filed for divorce eight months ago. 158 00:21:09,184 --> 00:21:11,734 Of course you don't know, you've been gone. 159 00:21:12,813 --> 00:21:14,023 What about Claire? 160 00:21:19,278 --> 00:21:20,448 He got custody. 161 00:21:22,072 --> 00:21:23,162 Shit. 162 00:21:27,202 --> 00:21:28,202 Well... 163 00:21:28,829 --> 00:21:31,669 You could always do your, uh, you know... 164 00:21:33,208 --> 00:21:34,208 rumor thing. 165 00:21:34,418 --> 00:21:36,038 Yeah, I don't do that anymore. 166 00:21:37,045 --> 00:21:39,715 - What happened? - Same thing that always happens. 167 00:21:40,424 --> 00:21:43,144 I made a wish, and it came true, and I couldn't take it back. 168 00:21:57,399 --> 00:21:58,399 Um... 169 00:21:58,817 --> 00:22:01,357 I guess we should get this started. 170 00:22:01,445 --> 00:22:04,065 So, I figured we could have a sort of memorial service 171 00:22:04,156 --> 00:22:05,366 in the courtyard at sundown. 172 00:22:05,949 --> 00:22:08,329 Say a few words, just at Dad's favorite spot. 173 00:22:08,410 --> 00:22:10,700 - Dad had a favorite spot? - You know, under the oak tree. 174 00:22:11,997 --> 00:22:14,058 We used to sit out there all the time. None of you ever did that? 175 00:22:14,082 --> 00:22:15,292 Will there be refreshments? 176 00:22:16,335 --> 00:22:19,625 Tea? Scones? Cucumber sandwiches are always a winner. 177 00:22:19,713 --> 00:22:22,633 What? No. And put that out. Dad didn't allow smoking in here. 178 00:22:22,716 --> 00:22:24,756 - Is that my skirt? - What? 179 00:22:24,843 --> 00:22:27,643 Oh, yeah, this. I found it in your room. 180 00:22:27,721 --> 00:22:32,311 It's a little dated, I know, but it's very breathey on the bits. 181 00:22:32,392 --> 00:22:36,402 Listen up. Still some important things that we need to discuss, all right? 182 00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:38,320 - Like what? - Like the way he died. 183 00:22:38,690 --> 00:22:39,780 And here we go. 184 00:22:39,858 --> 00:22:42,438 I don't understand. I thought they said it was a heart attack. 185 00:22:42,527 --> 00:22:43,713 Yeah, according to the coroner. 186 00:22:43,737 --> 00:22:45,457 - Well, wouldn't they know? - Theoretically. 187 00:22:45,530 --> 00:22:46,370 Theoretically? 188 00:22:46,448 --> 00:22:48,988 I'm just saying, at the very least, something happened. 189 00:22:49,576 --> 00:22:52,116 The last time that I talked to Dad, he sounded strange. 190 00:22:52,204 --> 00:22:54,164 Oh, quelle surprise! 191 00:22:54,623 --> 00:22:55,463 Strange how? 192 00:22:55,540 --> 00:22:59,040 He sounded on edge. Told me I should be careful who to trust. 193 00:22:59,127 --> 00:23:01,377 Luther, he was a paranoid, bitter old man 194 00:23:01,463 --> 00:23:03,593 who was starting to lose what was left of his marbles. 195 00:23:03,673 --> 00:23:05,843 No. He must have known something was going to happen. 196 00:23:06,593 --> 00:23:08,353 Look, I know you don't like to do it, 197 00:23:08,428 --> 00:23:09,928 but I need you to talk to Dad. 198 00:23:11,848 --> 00:23:16,438 I can't just call Dad in the afterlife and be like, "Dad, could you just... 199 00:23:16,978 --> 00:23:20,148 stop playing tennis with Hitler for a moment and take a quick call?" 200 00:23:20,232 --> 00:23:21,532 Since when? That's your thing. 201 00:23:21,608 --> 00:23:23,688 I'm not in the right... frame of mind. 202 00:23:23,777 --> 00:23:25,857 - You're high? - Yeah! Yeah! 203 00:23:25,946 --> 00:23:28,776 I mean, how are you not, listening to this nonsense? 204 00:23:28,865 --> 00:23:30,325 Well, sober up, this is important. 205 00:23:30,409 --> 00:23:31,636 Then there's the issue 206 00:23:31,660 --> 00:23:34,410 - of the missing monocle. - Who gives a shit about a stupid monocle? 207 00:23:34,496 --> 00:23:35,496 Exactly. 208 00:23:35,956 --> 00:23:36,956 It's worthless. 209 00:23:36,998 --> 00:23:39,128 So whoever took it, I think it was personal. 210 00:23:39,543 --> 00:23:41,503 Someone close to him. Someone with a grudge. 211 00:23:41,586 --> 00:23:44,546 - Where are you going with this? - Oh, isn't it obvious, Klaus? 212 00:23:44,631 --> 00:23:46,431 He thinks one of us killed Dad. 213 00:23:50,762 --> 00:23:51,972 You do? 214 00:23:52,055 --> 00:23:53,135 How could you think that? 215 00:23:54,141 --> 00:23:57,101 Great job, Luther. Way to lead. 216 00:23:57,561 --> 00:24:00,561 - That's not what I'm saying. - You're crazy, man. You're crazy. 217 00:24:00,939 --> 00:24:02,419 - Crazy. - I've not finished. 218 00:24:02,482 --> 00:24:04,168 Sorry, I'm just gonna go murder Mom. Be right back. 219 00:24:04,192 --> 00:24:06,072 - Be right back. - That's not what I was saying. 220 00:24:06,111 --> 00:24:07,491 I didn't... 221 00:24:09,573 --> 00:24:11,623 Allison. Jeez... 222 00:24:12,534 --> 00:24:14,374 That went well. 223 00:24:14,995 --> 00:24:17,865 In five, four, three, two... 224 00:24:18,206 --> 00:24:20,706 This is Jim Hellerman, reporting live for Channel 2 News 225 00:24:20,792 --> 00:24:23,632 outside of the Capital West bank at Main and Sixth. 226 00:24:23,879 --> 00:24:26,879 A group of heavily armed men stormed the bank not three hours ago 227 00:24:26,965 --> 00:24:29,085 and took an unknown number of hostages. 228 00:24:29,176 --> 00:24:31,636 Hey, get them behind the counter! 229 00:24:31,720 --> 00:24:33,010 Now you've put me in a position 230 00:24:33,096 --> 00:24:36,636 where I gotta do something I don't want to do. Hmm? 231 00:24:36,933 --> 00:24:37,933 Shit! 232 00:24:39,436 --> 00:24:41,646 Hey, get back with the others. 233 00:24:41,980 --> 00:24:43,730 I heard a rumor. 234 00:24:43,815 --> 00:24:45,065 What? What did you say? 235 00:24:47,235 --> 00:24:51,105 I heard a rumor that you shot your friend in the foot. 236 00:24:54,284 --> 00:24:56,124 Hey, dude. 237 00:24:56,703 --> 00:24:58,793 What the hell? 238 00:25:01,958 --> 00:25:04,338 We just heard shots from inside the bank. 239 00:25:04,419 --> 00:25:06,669 It's uncertain if any hostages have been harmed in that. 240 00:25:06,755 --> 00:25:07,755 Up there! 241 00:25:08,215 --> 00:25:11,295 There's some movement on the roof. Possibly law enforcement. 242 00:25:17,474 --> 00:25:21,194 Looks like one of the armed robbers has been thrown from the bank. 243 00:25:21,269 --> 00:25:23,979 Guns are for sissies. Real men throw knives. 244 00:25:27,275 --> 00:25:29,355 I've been in many hostage situations, like this, 245 00:25:29,444 --> 00:25:30,954 and it can escalate very quickly. 246 00:25:31,029 --> 00:25:32,239 Get back, you freaks. 247 00:25:32,322 --> 00:25:34,342 - Hey, be careful up there, buddy. - Get back now! 248 00:25:34,366 --> 00:25:36,656 - Wouldn't want you to get hurt. - Or what? 249 00:25:41,581 --> 00:25:45,791 Ooh! That's one badass stapler! 250 00:25:49,714 --> 00:25:51,567 Although there's been no activity for a few minutes, 251 00:25:51,591 --> 00:25:54,278 we're gonna stay live on location to make sure we don't miss anything 252 00:25:54,302 --> 00:25:56,472 in this hostage situation at the Capital West bank. 253 00:25:57,264 --> 00:25:58,854 Do we really have to do this? 254 00:25:58,932 --> 00:26:01,732 Come on, Ben. There's more guys in the vault. 255 00:26:02,435 --> 00:26:04,895 I didn't sign up for this. 256 00:26:05,272 --> 00:26:08,442 Now we see the hostages. They... They're free. 257 00:26:08,525 --> 00:26:11,395 They're scared, clearly, but they do seem to be unharmed. 258 00:26:27,043 --> 00:26:29,843 Can we go home now? 259 00:26:29,921 --> 00:26:32,971 People are coming out now. It's not the armed robbers. 260 00:26:33,049 --> 00:26:37,259 These are young schoolchildren in uniforms with masks on. 261 00:26:37,345 --> 00:26:39,925 - Lower your weapon! - Jim Hellerman, Channel 2 News. 262 00:26:40,015 --> 00:26:42,618 - How did you get in the bank? - What happened inside? 263 00:26:42,642 --> 00:26:44,852 Why can't I go play with the others? 264 00:26:45,228 --> 00:26:47,608 We've been through this before, Number Seven. 265 00:26:49,941 --> 00:26:52,571 I'm afraid there's just nothing special about you. 266 00:26:56,364 --> 00:26:57,364 Oh. 267 00:26:58,992 --> 00:27:01,372 Our world is changing. 268 00:27:01,453 --> 00:27:02,793 Has changed. 269 00:27:03,163 --> 00:27:05,213 There are some among us 270 00:27:05,290 --> 00:27:09,090 gifted with abilities far beyond the ordinary. 271 00:27:09,919 --> 00:27:13,259 I have adopted six such children. 272 00:27:13,590 --> 00:27:15,720 I give you the inaugural class 273 00:27:16,676 --> 00:27:18,386 of the Umbrella Academy. 274 00:27:18,470 --> 00:27:20,640 Mr. Hargreeves! Mr. Hargreeves. Channel 9 News. 275 00:27:20,722 --> 00:27:22,022 What happened to their parents? 276 00:27:22,098 --> 00:27:23,848 They were suitably compensated. 277 00:27:23,933 --> 00:27:26,103 Are you concerned about the welfare of the children? 278 00:27:26,186 --> 00:27:27,186 Of course. 279 00:27:27,604 --> 00:27:29,864 As I am for the fate of the world. 280 00:27:33,693 --> 00:27:34,943 Listen up, old man. 281 00:27:35,028 --> 00:27:37,358 You know, if I was murdered, and if one of my sons... 282 00:27:37,447 --> 00:27:39,657 adopted sons... happened to be able 283 00:27:39,741 --> 00:27:42,081 to commune with the dead, I might think about, 284 00:27:42,160 --> 00:27:44,620 I don't know, I don't know... 285 00:27:44,704 --> 00:27:45,914 manifesting! 286 00:27:46,206 --> 00:27:48,876 Do the whole big angry ghost lecture. 287 00:27:49,125 --> 00:27:53,665 Tell everyone who done it, and find eternal peace. 288 00:27:53,963 --> 00:27:56,473 Eternal peace is probably overrated. 289 00:28:10,188 --> 00:28:11,478 Come on now, Reggie. 290 00:28:13,024 --> 00:28:14,194 Any time now. 291 00:28:16,569 --> 00:28:18,489 Please. 292 00:28:18,571 --> 00:28:20,031 Just need to sober up! 293 00:28:22,117 --> 00:28:23,577 Clear thoughts. 294 00:28:27,706 --> 00:28:30,746 Come on! Come on, chop-chop! 295 00:28:30,834 --> 00:28:33,554 You always were a stubborn bastard! 296 00:28:33,628 --> 00:28:36,968 I don't know about you, but I need a drink. 297 00:28:41,177 --> 00:28:42,177 Oh! 298 00:29:36,983 --> 00:29:39,993 Oh. Three? Okay! 299 00:32:54,639 --> 00:32:56,349 Oh! Daddy? 300 00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:03,610 Oh. 301 00:33:06,359 --> 00:33:08,479 - What is it? - Don't get too close! 302 00:33:08,528 --> 00:33:09,698 Yeah, no shit. 303 00:33:09,779 --> 00:33:12,029 Looks like some sort of temporal anomaly. 304 00:33:13,032 --> 00:33:15,542 Either that or a miniature black hole. One of the two. 305 00:33:15,618 --> 00:33:18,328 - Pretty big difference there, Paul Bunyan. - Out of the way! 306 00:33:18,746 --> 00:33:19,746 What are you... 307 00:33:23,584 --> 00:33:25,714 - What is that gonna do? - I don't know. 308 00:33:25,795 --> 00:33:27,125 Do you have a better idea? 309 00:33:27,880 --> 00:33:30,010 Whoa, whoa, whoa. 310 00:33:30,091 --> 00:33:32,801 - Everybody get behind me. - Yeah, get behind us. 311 00:33:32,885 --> 00:33:35,215 I vote for running, c'mon! 312 00:33:55,116 --> 00:33:56,736 Does anyone else see 313 00:33:57,452 --> 00:34:00,372 little Number Five, or is that just me? 314 00:34:05,168 --> 00:34:06,168 Shit. 315 00:34:09,464 --> 00:34:12,094 What's the date? The exact date. 316 00:34:12,175 --> 00:34:13,295 The 24th. 317 00:34:13,384 --> 00:34:14,644 - Of what? - March. 318 00:34:15,678 --> 00:34:16,508 Good. 319 00:34:16,596 --> 00:34:19,096 So, are we gonna talk about what just happened? 320 00:34:24,395 --> 00:34:26,015 It's been 17 years. 321 00:34:26,355 --> 00:34:28,855 It's been a lot longer than that. 322 00:34:30,568 --> 00:34:31,648 I haven't missed that. 323 00:34:31,736 --> 00:34:32,566 Where'd you go? 324 00:34:32,653 --> 00:34:35,203 The future. It's shit, by the way. 325 00:34:35,281 --> 00:34:36,281 Called it. 326 00:34:36,532 --> 00:34:38,702 I should've listened to the old man. 327 00:34:39,077 --> 00:34:41,697 You know, jumping through space is one thing, 328 00:34:42,121 --> 00:34:44,251 jumping through time is a toss of the dice. 329 00:34:46,834 --> 00:34:47,674 Nice dress. 330 00:34:47,752 --> 00:34:49,342 Oh, well, danke! 331 00:34:49,420 --> 00:34:50,760 Wait, how did you get back? 332 00:34:50,838 --> 00:34:53,008 In the end, I had to project my consciousness forward 333 00:34:53,091 --> 00:34:55,761 into a suspended quantum state version of myself 334 00:34:55,843 --> 00:34:58,263 that exists across every possible instance of time. 335 00:34:58,846 --> 00:34:59,886 That makes no sense. 336 00:34:59,972 --> 00:35:01,372 Well, it would if you were smarter. 337 00:35:02,225 --> 00:35:05,435 - How long were you there? - Forty-five years. Give or take. 338 00:35:08,022 --> 00:35:10,692 So what are you saying? That you're 58? 339 00:35:11,067 --> 00:35:13,817 No, my consciousness is 58. 340 00:35:14,612 --> 00:35:16,662 Apparently, my body is now 13 again. 341 00:35:16,739 --> 00:35:18,489 Wait, how does that even work? 342 00:35:18,574 --> 00:35:21,414 Delores kept saying the equations were off. Eh. 343 00:35:22,245 --> 00:35:23,445 Bet she's laughing now. 344 00:35:23,538 --> 00:35:24,538 Delores? 345 00:35:25,373 --> 00:35:26,373 Hmm. 346 00:35:26,666 --> 00:35:28,852 - Guess I missed the funeral. - How'd you know about that? 347 00:35:28,876 --> 00:35:30,706 What part of the future do you not understand? 348 00:35:31,379 --> 00:35:32,259 Heart failure, huh? 349 00:35:32,338 --> 00:35:33,458 - Yeah. - No. 350 00:35:34,173 --> 00:35:35,173 Hmm. 351 00:35:35,466 --> 00:35:37,426 Nice to see nothing's changed. 352 00:35:38,052 --> 00:35:40,472 Uh, that's it? That's all you have to say? 353 00:35:40,555 --> 00:35:43,515 What else is there to say? The circle of life. 354 00:35:46,310 --> 00:35:47,310 Well... 355 00:35:48,980 --> 00:35:49,980 That was interesting. 356 00:35:58,906 --> 00:36:00,366 Ah, shit. 357 00:36:07,248 --> 00:36:08,998 Nice to know Dad didn't forget me. 358 00:36:10,751 --> 00:36:12,131 Read your book, by the way. 359 00:36:13,713 --> 00:36:15,763 Found it in a library that was still standing. 360 00:36:19,302 --> 00:36:22,562 I thought it was pretty good, all things considered. 361 00:36:23,389 --> 00:36:24,809 Yeah, definitely ballsy, 362 00:36:25,308 --> 00:36:27,098 giving up the family secrets. 363 00:36:29,395 --> 00:36:30,725 Sure that went over well. 364 00:36:31,147 --> 00:36:31,977 They hate me. 365 00:36:32,064 --> 00:36:34,114 Oh, there are worse things that can happen. 366 00:36:34,525 --> 00:36:36,315 You mean like what happened to Ben? 367 00:36:38,237 --> 00:36:39,237 Was it bad? 368 00:37:13,940 --> 00:37:15,070 Did something happen? 369 00:37:17,652 --> 00:37:20,242 Dad died. Remember? 370 00:37:20,446 --> 00:37:22,656 Oh. Yes, of course. 371 00:37:24,033 --> 00:37:25,033 Is Mom okay? 372 00:37:25,243 --> 00:37:27,123 Yeah, yeah, she's fine. 373 00:37:27,662 --> 00:37:30,622 She just needs to rest. You know, recharge. 374 00:37:35,211 --> 00:37:36,551 Whenever you're ready, dear boy. 375 00:37:58,442 --> 00:38:01,112 Probably would have been better with some wind. 376 00:38:02,947 --> 00:38:05,027 Does anyone wish to speak? 377 00:38:10,162 --> 00:38:11,292 Very well. 378 00:38:14,792 --> 00:38:16,542 In all regards, 379 00:38:17,044 --> 00:38:21,724 Sir Reginald Hargreeves made me what I am today. 380 00:38:23,968 --> 00:38:27,558 For that alone, I shall forever be in his debt. 381 00:38:29,098 --> 00:38:30,808 He was my master... 382 00:38:32,643 --> 00:38:33,983 and my friend, 383 00:38:35,771 --> 00:38:37,771 and I shall miss him very much. 384 00:38:42,945 --> 00:38:45,485 He leaves behind a complicated legacy... 385 00:38:45,573 --> 00:38:46,953 He was a monster. 386 00:38:48,826 --> 00:38:51,366 He was a bad person and a worse father. 387 00:38:52,955 --> 00:38:54,825 - The world's better off without him. - Diego. 388 00:38:54,915 --> 00:38:56,705 My name is Number Two. 389 00:38:57,376 --> 00:38:58,456 You know why? 390 00:38:59,170 --> 00:39:02,590 Because our father couldn't be bothered to give us actual names. 391 00:39:03,299 --> 00:39:04,589 He had Mom do it. 392 00:39:04,675 --> 00:39:06,335 Would anyone like something to eat? 393 00:39:06,427 --> 00:39:07,717 No, it's okay, Mom. 394 00:39:08,095 --> 00:39:10,005 Oh, okay. 395 00:39:11,098 --> 00:39:13,098 Look, you wanna pay your respects? 396 00:39:15,436 --> 00:39:16,436 Go ahead. 397 00:39:17,605 --> 00:39:19,645 But at least be honest about the kind of man he was. 398 00:39:19,940 --> 00:39:21,150 You should stop talking now. 399 00:39:23,027 --> 00:39:26,277 You know, you of all people should be on my side here, Number One. 400 00:39:26,364 --> 00:39:27,284 I am warning you. 401 00:39:27,365 --> 00:39:29,325 After everything he did to you? 402 00:39:30,117 --> 00:39:32,697 He had to ship you a million miles away. 403 00:39:32,787 --> 00:39:34,247 Diego, stop talking. 404 00:39:34,330 --> 00:39:37,500 That's how much he couldn't stand the sight of you! 405 00:39:41,545 --> 00:39:43,295 Boys, stop this at once! 406 00:39:45,341 --> 00:39:46,931 Come on, big boy! 407 00:39:50,513 --> 00:39:51,513 Stop it! 408 00:39:51,597 --> 00:39:53,467 Hit him! Hit him! 409 00:40:05,069 --> 00:40:06,899 Get off me! 410 00:40:12,743 --> 00:40:14,253 We don't have time for this. 411 00:40:15,329 --> 00:40:16,409 Come here, big boy! 412 00:40:21,502 --> 00:40:23,382 Oh... 413 00:40:23,629 --> 00:40:25,339 And there goes Ben's statue. 414 00:40:29,677 --> 00:40:31,297 Diego, no! 415 00:40:49,155 --> 00:40:51,025 You never know when to stop, do you? 416 00:40:54,410 --> 00:40:56,580 You got enough material for your sequel yet? 417 00:40:59,457 --> 00:41:00,997 He was my father, too. 418 00:41:13,637 --> 00:41:14,637 Mom. 419 00:41:15,890 --> 00:41:17,020 Let's go inside. 420 00:41:17,766 --> 00:41:19,226 Come on. Okay? Come on. 421 00:41:39,205 --> 00:41:41,995 I bet you're loving this. Hmm? 422 00:41:43,542 --> 00:41:45,962 The team at its best. 423 00:41:47,922 --> 00:41:50,092 It's just like old times. 424 00:41:58,307 --> 00:42:01,187 Best funeral ever. 425 00:42:01,936 --> 00:42:03,686 Nietzsche once said, 426 00:42:03,771 --> 00:42:05,401 "Man is as a rope 427 00:42:05,481 --> 00:42:08,691 stretched between the animal and the superhuman. 428 00:42:09,193 --> 00:42:11,283 A rope over an abyss. 429 00:42:11,362 --> 00:42:13,242 It is a dangerous crossing, 430 00:42:13,322 --> 00:42:17,702 a dangerous looking-back, a dangerous trembling and halting." 431 00:42:19,328 --> 00:42:22,038 As much as you must strive for individual greatness, 432 00:42:22,122 --> 00:42:23,542 and strive you must, 433 00:42:23,624 --> 00:42:25,964 for it won't come to you of its own accord... 434 00:42:26,877 --> 00:42:28,377 you must also remember 435 00:42:28,462 --> 00:42:31,302 that there is no individual stronger than the collective. 436 00:42:32,758 --> 00:42:34,398 That's not fair, Five's cheating! 437 00:42:34,468 --> 00:42:35,678 He adapted. 438 00:42:37,721 --> 00:42:39,811 The ties that bind you together 439 00:42:39,890 --> 00:42:42,600 make you stronger than you are alone. 440 00:42:47,147 --> 00:42:48,817 They will make you impervious 441 00:42:48,899 --> 00:42:52,359 to the pain and hardship the world will thrust upon you. 442 00:42:53,612 --> 00:42:55,202 And believe me when I tell you, 443 00:42:56,240 --> 00:42:57,870 life will be hard. 444 00:42:59,201 --> 00:43:00,661 It will be painful. 445 00:43:22,516 --> 00:43:24,556 We can accomplish anything 446 00:43:24,643 --> 00:43:27,983 when we accept responsibility together. 447 00:43:28,981 --> 00:43:31,941 This is what creates trust. 448 00:44:00,387 --> 00:44:03,427 Together, you will stand against the reign of evil. 449 00:44:19,782 --> 00:44:21,332 Don't waste your time. 450 00:44:22,076 --> 00:44:23,986 Diego's right, I shouldn't have come. 451 00:44:24,078 --> 00:44:27,208 This is your home and always will be. 452 00:44:28,707 --> 00:44:30,077 Should I get you a taxi? 453 00:44:30,167 --> 00:44:32,167 I already called one. But thanks. 454 00:44:33,295 --> 00:44:34,875 - That's me. - Uh... 455 00:44:35,547 --> 00:44:37,087 I hope you know 456 00:44:37,174 --> 00:44:40,014 your father loved you very much. 457 00:44:41,428 --> 00:44:42,598 In his own way. 458 00:44:44,890 --> 00:44:46,810 Yeah, well, that's kind of the problem, isn't it? 459 00:44:46,892 --> 00:44:48,062 Take care of yourself. 460 00:44:48,435 --> 00:44:50,055 You as well, Miss Vanya. 461 00:45:19,550 --> 00:45:20,680 Where's Vanya? 462 00:45:21,385 --> 00:45:23,385 Oh, she's gone. 463 00:45:24,430 --> 00:45:25,950 - That's unfortunate. - Yeah. 464 00:45:26,974 --> 00:45:30,194 An entire square block. Forty-two bedrooms, 19 bathrooms, 465 00:45:30,269 --> 00:45:32,479 but no, not a single drop of coffee. 466 00:45:32,563 --> 00:45:33,613 Dad hated caffeine. 467 00:45:33,689 --> 00:45:37,939 Well, he hated children, too, and he had plenty of us. 468 00:45:39,862 --> 00:45:40,902 I'm taking the car. 469 00:45:41,822 --> 00:45:43,282 Where are you going? 470 00:45:45,200 --> 00:45:46,870 To get a decent cup of coffee. 471 00:45:46,952 --> 00:45:48,542 Do you even know how to drive? 472 00:45:48,996 --> 00:45:50,536 I know how to do everything. 473 00:45:51,999 --> 00:45:54,709 I feel like we should try and stop him, 474 00:45:54,793 --> 00:45:58,303 but then again, I also just kinda want to see what happens. 475 00:46:04,303 --> 00:46:07,103 All right, I guess I'll see you guys in, what, ten years? 476 00:46:07,181 --> 00:46:08,601 When Pogo dies? 477 00:46:08,682 --> 00:46:11,482 - Not if you die first. - Yeah, love you too, sis. 478 00:46:11,560 --> 00:46:13,020 Good luck on your next film. 479 00:46:13,604 --> 00:46:15,944 Hope it turns out better than your marriage, huh? 480 00:46:21,403 --> 00:46:23,783 - Are... Are we leaving? - No, I'm leaving, me by myself. 481 00:46:23,864 --> 00:46:25,914 Oh, fabulous! I'll get my things. 482 00:46:36,585 --> 00:46:38,495 Hey! Diego. 483 00:46:38,587 --> 00:46:41,797 You know, every time I close my eyes, 484 00:46:41,882 --> 00:46:45,012 I see a diarrhetic hippo about to shit on my face. 485 00:46:45,636 --> 00:46:46,886 It's terrifying! 486 00:46:47,262 --> 00:46:48,262 Terrific. 487 00:46:50,891 --> 00:46:52,811 No! No. 488 00:46:52,893 --> 00:46:55,103 Lean back. 489 00:48:55,682 --> 00:48:58,602 Sorry, sink was clogged. 490 00:48:58,810 --> 00:49:00,440 So, what'll it be? 491 00:49:00,854 --> 00:49:03,694 - Uh, give me a chocolate éclair. - Mm-hmm. Sure. 492 00:49:04,650 --> 00:49:07,650 Can I get the kid a glass of milk or something? 493 00:49:08,278 --> 00:49:11,868 The kid wants coffee. Black. 494 00:49:13,742 --> 00:49:15,122 Cute kid. 495 00:49:20,999 --> 00:49:21,999 Okay. 496 00:49:32,010 --> 00:49:34,470 Don't remember this place being such a shithole. 497 00:49:34,972 --> 00:49:36,432 I used to come here as a kid. 498 00:49:36,515 --> 00:49:38,595 Used to sneak out with my brothers and sisters 499 00:49:38,684 --> 00:49:40,894 and eat doughnuts till we puked. 500 00:49:42,145 --> 00:49:43,475 Simpler times, huh? 501 00:49:43,855 --> 00:49:44,855 Eh. 502 00:49:45,482 --> 00:49:46,652 I suppose. 503 00:49:49,236 --> 00:49:51,236 Here. 504 00:49:54,533 --> 00:49:55,533 I got his. 505 00:49:56,743 --> 00:49:57,743 Thanks. 506 00:50:02,249 --> 00:50:03,809 You must know your way around the city. 507 00:50:05,168 --> 00:50:07,498 I hope so. I've been driving it for 20 years. 508 00:50:07,838 --> 00:50:09,838 Good. I need an address. 509 00:50:32,320 --> 00:50:34,610 Hmm. That was fast. 510 00:50:34,990 --> 00:50:37,370 I thought I'd have more time before they found me. 511 00:50:37,451 --> 00:50:38,451 Okay. 512 00:50:38,618 --> 00:50:40,998 So let's all be professional about this, yeah? 513 00:50:41,538 --> 00:50:44,168 On your feet and come with us. They want to talk. 514 00:50:44,708 --> 00:50:46,038 I've got nothing to say. 515 00:50:47,210 --> 00:50:49,170 It doesn't have to go this way. 516 00:50:49,838 --> 00:50:53,338 You think I want to shoot a kid? Go home with that on my conscience? 517 00:50:55,427 --> 00:50:57,297 Well, I wouldn't worry about that. 518 00:50:58,263 --> 00:50:59,313 You won't be going home. 519 00:51:09,649 --> 00:51:10,649 Hey, assholes! 520 00:53:13,565 --> 00:53:15,565 Do you ever remember a single time 521 00:53:15,650 --> 00:53:17,650 that Dad wasn't wearing his monocle? 522 00:53:25,535 --> 00:53:27,445 Yoo-hoo, Diego! 523 00:53:28,205 --> 00:53:31,995 I hate to rush you through any kind of brooding moment you might be having, 524 00:53:32,083 --> 00:53:34,043 but come on, man, we're starving! 525 00:53:43,637 --> 00:53:45,967 I'm craving... 526 00:53:46,389 --> 00:53:47,389 eggs. 527 00:53:47,474 --> 00:53:48,734 No! 528 00:53:49,559 --> 00:53:51,559 Wait, it's too late for eggs. 529 00:53:52,145 --> 00:53:54,055 Waffles. Huh? 530 00:53:54,481 --> 00:53:55,821 You like waffles, right? 531 00:53:56,566 --> 00:53:58,566 Ah. Of course you do. 532 00:53:59,986 --> 00:54:01,906 Everyone likes waffles. 533 00:54:10,497 --> 00:54:12,997 Gunshots reported on the 400 block 534 00:54:13,083 --> 00:54:15,133 of Milton Avenue, Griddy's Doughnuts. 535 00:54:18,713 --> 00:54:20,553 Diego, thank you for joining us, 536 00:54:20,632 --> 00:54:23,972 we have decided on, drum roll, waffles. 537 00:54:24,052 --> 00:54:27,312 I'm gonna drop you off at the bus stop. I gotta get back to work. 538 00:54:30,058 --> 00:54:33,478 What, breaking bones and cracking skulls? 539 00:54:33,561 --> 00:54:35,231 Saving lives, baby. 540 00:54:35,897 --> 00:54:38,857 Well, I guess it's frozen waffles again. 541 00:54:47,867 --> 00:54:49,827 Yeah, I could do egg and bacon, 542 00:54:49,911 --> 00:54:52,831 but I'm trying to cut down on my pig products. 543 00:55:25,071 --> 00:55:26,111 Jesus! 544 00:55:26,197 --> 00:55:28,027 You should have locks on your windows. 545 00:55:28,450 --> 00:55:30,040 I live on the second floor. 546 00:55:30,118 --> 00:55:31,288 Rapists can climb. 547 00:55:32,454 --> 00:55:33,584 You are so weird. 548 00:55:43,965 --> 00:55:44,965 Is that blood? 549 00:55:47,135 --> 00:55:48,135 It's nothing. 550 00:55:50,638 --> 00:55:51,638 Why are you here? 551 00:55:53,433 --> 00:55:55,983 I've decided you're the only one I can trust. 552 00:55:56,436 --> 00:55:57,436 Why me? 553 00:55:57,687 --> 00:55:58,687 Because you're ordinary. 554 00:56:01,316 --> 00:56:02,316 Because you'll listen. 555 00:56:04,652 --> 00:56:05,652 Okay. 556 00:56:25,090 --> 00:56:27,590 When I jumped forward and got stuck in the future, 557 00:56:28,510 --> 00:56:29,550 do you know what I found? 558 00:56:29,969 --> 00:56:31,929 - No. - Nothing. 559 00:56:34,682 --> 00:56:36,312 Absolutely nothing. 560 00:56:38,228 --> 00:56:41,608 As far as I could tell, I was the last person left alive. 561 00:56:42,440 --> 00:56:45,240 I never figured out what killed the human race, but... 562 00:56:46,486 --> 00:56:47,946 I did find something else. 563 00:56:50,448 --> 00:56:51,738 The date it happens. 564 00:57:03,753 --> 00:57:05,513 The world ends in eight days, 565 00:57:05,964 --> 00:57:07,884 and I have no idea how to stop it. 566 00:57:16,724 --> 00:57:18,484 I'll put on a pot of coffee.