1 00:00:01,202 --> 00:00:02,636 - I WILL CERTIFY THE RESULTS AFTER ALL THE PRECINCTS 2 00:00:02,670 --> 00:00:03,204 HAVE REPORTED. 3 00:00:03,237 --> 00:00:05,073 A FINAL TALLY WITHIN 1% 4 00:00:05,106 --> 00:00:06,607 WOULD TRIGGER AN AUTOMATIC RECOUNT. 5 00:00:06,640 --> 00:00:08,476 IN THE EVENT OF AN EXACT TIE, 6 00:00:08,509 --> 00:00:10,444 THE SEAT IS AWARDED TO THE MALE CANDIDATE, 7 00:00:10,478 --> 00:00:12,613 AND THE FEMALE CANDIDATE IS PUT IN JAIL. 8 00:00:12,646 --> 00:00:14,482 - ONCE AGAIN, I HAVE TO OBJECT. 9 00:00:14,515 --> 00:00:16,384 - I DON'T THINK IT WOULD HOLD UP IN COURT, 10 00:00:16,417 --> 00:00:18,086 BUT IT IS CITY LAW. 11 00:00:18,119 --> 00:00:20,488 ANY QUESTIONS? - YES, ACTUALLY. 12 00:00:20,521 --> 00:00:23,791 AT THE 11th HOUR THE NEWPORTS ARE TRYING TO INSTALL 13 00:00:23,824 --> 00:00:25,793 THESE VOTING MACHINES AT SEVERAL PRECINCTS 14 00:00:25,826 --> 00:00:26,860 AROUND TOWN. 15 00:00:26,894 --> 00:00:31,099 WATCH WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I VOTE FOR BOBBY NEWPORT. 16 00:00:31,132 --> 00:00:32,500 - [computer voice] GOOD CHOICE. 17 00:00:32,533 --> 00:00:34,568 ENJOY A VOUCHER FOR A COMPLIMENTARY 18 00:00:34,602 --> 00:00:36,270 SWEETUMS CANDY BAR. 19 00:00:36,304 --> 00:00:37,838 - SHOULDN'T WE BE REWARDING OUR CITIZENS FOR VOTING? 20 00:00:37,871 --> 00:00:40,074 - I'M NEVER AGAINST ANYONE GETTING A CANDY BAR, 21 00:00:40,108 --> 00:00:43,477 BUT WATCH WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU VOTE FOR ME. 22 00:00:43,511 --> 00:00:44,745 [buzzer sounds] 23 00:00:44,778 --> 00:00:46,547 - [computer voice] ARE YOU SURE? TAKE A SECOND AND THINK IT OVER. 24 00:00:46,580 --> 00:00:49,217 - THEN YOU HAVE TO PRESS IT AGAIN. 25 00:00:49,250 --> 00:00:52,353 [baby crying] 26 00:00:52,386 --> 00:00:53,221 - [computer voice] TO CANCEL YOUR VOTE AND SELECT 27 00:00:53,254 --> 00:00:56,224 SOMEONE BETTER, PRESS THE SWEETUMS LOGO. 28 00:00:56,257 --> 00:00:58,792 - I'M SORRY. I JUST DON'T SEE THE PROBLEM. 29 00:00:58,826 --> 00:01:01,862 [triumphant music] 30 00:01:01,895 --> 00:01:10,104 * 31 00:01:19,280 --> 00:01:20,881 - BOBBY NEWPORT AND I ARE SEPARATED 32 00:01:20,914 --> 00:01:22,416 BY A RAZOR-THIN MARGIN. 33 00:01:22,450 --> 00:01:23,884 COULD GO EITHER WAY. 34 00:01:23,917 --> 00:01:26,454 I'VE ONLY SLEPT NINE HOURS OVER THE PAST FOUR DAYS, 35 00:01:26,487 --> 00:01:30,291 SO I'M RIGHT ON THE VERGE OF A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN. 36 00:01:30,324 --> 00:01:31,792 THIS ISN'T A BAGEL. 37 00:01:31,825 --> 00:01:33,461 - PARTY STARTS AT 7:00 38 00:01:33,494 --> 00:01:36,197 IN THE HISTORIC JERMAINE JACKSON BALLROOM 39 00:01:36,230 --> 00:01:37,631 AT THE PAWNEE SUPERSUITES. 40 00:01:37,665 --> 00:01:42,170 IT IS NO LONGER "A PIMPS N' HOES" PAJAMA PARTY. 41 00:01:42,203 --> 00:01:46,174 THAT IDEA WAS NIXED BY A CERTAIN UPTIGHT NERD 42 00:01:46,207 --> 00:01:48,642 WHO SHALL REMAIN NAMELESS. 43 00:01:48,676 --> 00:01:51,179 BY 10:00, WE SHOULD KNOW IF LESLIE WON THE ELECTION, 44 00:01:51,212 --> 00:01:54,315 BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY, TONIGHT, 45 00:01:54,348 --> 00:01:55,583 ANN AND I ARE GETTING BACK TOGETHER. 46 00:01:55,616 --> 00:01:57,885 - OH, RIGHT, BECAUSE OF THE DREAM YOU HAD? 47 00:01:57,918 --> 00:02:00,154 - LAST NIGHT AT APPROXIMATELY 2:30 A.M., 48 00:02:00,188 --> 00:02:02,190 I WOKE UP FROM A DREAM THAT FELT SO REAL 49 00:02:02,223 --> 00:02:03,657 THAT IT HAD TO BE A PREMONITION. 50 00:02:03,691 --> 00:02:05,493 ME, DRAKE, AND THE T-MOBILE GIRL 51 00:02:05,526 --> 00:02:07,628 WERE PLAYING BACCARAT ON A PRIVATE JET. 52 00:02:07,661 --> 00:02:10,498 ANN PERKINS WALKS UP TO ME, AND SHE SAYS, 53 00:02:10,531 --> 00:02:14,202 "TOMMY, TOMORROW NIGHT, I'M TAKING YOU BACK." 54 00:02:14,235 --> 00:02:18,572 THEN BLUE IVY CARTER HIGH-FIVED ME AND GAVE ME $40 MILLION. 55 00:02:18,606 --> 00:02:21,475 IT WASALLSO REAL. 56 00:02:21,509 --> 00:02:24,212 - THE REASON WHY BOBBY AND I ARE APPEARING TOGETHER 57 00:02:24,245 --> 00:02:26,680 IS TO SEND THE MESSAGE THAT EVERYONE SHOULD GET OUT AND VOTE 58 00:02:26,714 --> 00:02:28,216 NO MATTER WHO THEY'RE VOTING FOR. 59 00:02:28,249 --> 00:02:30,518 - THAT'S RIGHT. ANOTHER AWESOME POINT BY LESLIE. 60 00:02:30,551 --> 00:02:32,320 THAT'S WHY I'M VOTING FOR YOU. 61 00:02:32,353 --> 00:02:33,621 [laughter] 62 00:02:33,654 --> 00:02:35,289 - [laughs] WHAT'S SO FUNNY? 63 00:02:35,323 --> 00:02:36,590 - THEY'RE LAUGHING AT YOUR JOKE. 64 00:02:36,624 --> 00:02:37,591 - WHAT JOKE? 65 00:02:37,625 --> 00:02:39,327 IAMVOTING FOR YOU. 66 00:02:39,360 --> 00:02:40,828 - YOU'RE NOT VOTING FOR YOURSELF? 67 00:02:40,861 --> 00:02:43,331 - LESLIE, YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR YOURSELF, I DON'T THINK. 68 00:02:43,364 --> 00:02:46,300 I'M PRETTY SURE THAT'S ILLEGAL. 69 00:02:46,334 --> 00:02:47,268 - ANYTHING ELSE? 70 00:02:47,301 --> 00:02:49,337 [indistinct chatter] 71 00:02:49,370 --> 00:02:51,305 - HEY, YOU DID AN UNBELIEVABLE JOB 72 00:02:51,339 --> 00:02:52,306 ON THIS CAMPAIGN, BEN. 73 00:02:52,340 --> 00:02:54,642 MY PARTNERS BACK IN WASHINGTON THINK SO TOO. 74 00:02:54,675 --> 00:02:57,245 - WELL, LESLIE GETS THE CREDIT. NOT ME. 75 00:02:57,278 --> 00:02:58,346 - LOOK. 76 00:02:58,379 --> 00:03:00,581 YOUR OPPONENT IS LEGENDARILY STUPID 77 00:03:00,614 --> 00:03:03,317 AND I PHONED IT IN PRETTY HARD, BUT YOU HAVE A KNACK FOR THIS. 78 00:03:03,351 --> 00:03:05,686 I'M RUNNING CONGRESSMAN MURRAY'S REELECTION BID. 79 00:03:05,719 --> 00:03:07,221 OHIO, 19. 80 00:03:07,255 --> 00:03:09,290 I NEED SOMEONE TO COORDINATE OUT OF D.C. 81 00:03:09,323 --> 00:03:11,559 YOU WANT TO DO IT? 82 00:03:11,592 --> 00:03:14,262 - YEAH, THAT SOUNDS GREAT, BUT THE PACERS CALLED, 83 00:03:14,295 --> 00:03:15,963 AND THEY'RE ASKING ME TO BE THEIR STARTING POINT GUARD. 84 00:03:15,996 --> 00:03:17,265 - I'M BEING SERIOUS, BEN. 85 00:03:17,298 --> 00:03:19,867 - WHAT? 86 00:03:19,900 --> 00:03:22,236 WHAT, YOU TRUST ME WITH A CONGRESSIONAL CAMPAIGN? 87 00:03:22,270 --> 00:03:24,305 IS THIS A TRICK? 88 00:03:24,338 --> 00:03:25,606 - NO. THIS IS A JOB OFFER. 89 00:03:25,639 --> 00:03:26,940 GIVE ME YOUR ANSWER SOON. 90 00:03:26,974 --> 00:03:30,711 I NEED YOU IN WASHINGTON IN TWO DAYS. 91 00:03:30,744 --> 00:03:32,980 - [chuckling] 92 00:03:33,013 --> 00:03:35,783 LOOK AT THAT THING. WHAT IS THAT? 93 00:03:35,816 --> 00:03:36,917 - DON'T TOUCH IT. 94 00:03:38,352 --> 00:03:39,453 - ANN PERKINS. 95 00:03:39,487 --> 00:03:40,754 CAN I ASK YOUR ADVICE ON SOMETHING? 96 00:03:40,788 --> 00:03:41,555 - SURE. 97 00:03:41,589 --> 00:03:43,257 - RECENTLY IN A MOMENT OF WEAKNESS, 98 00:03:43,291 --> 00:03:45,626 I HAD SEX WITH BOBBY NEWPORT'S CAMPAIGN MANAGER 99 00:03:45,659 --> 00:03:46,760 JENNIFER BARKLEY. 100 00:03:46,794 --> 00:03:47,761 - SERIOUSLY? 101 00:03:47,795 --> 00:03:49,463 - YES. SEVERAL TIMES. 102 00:03:49,497 --> 00:03:50,598 AND THEN SEVERAL MORE TIMES. 103 00:03:50,631 --> 00:03:53,434 AND THEN A COUPLE MORE TIMES. 104 00:03:53,467 --> 00:03:54,635 AND THEN ONE MORE TIME. 105 00:03:54,668 --> 00:03:56,404 - HOW HAS THIS BEEN GOING ON? 106 00:03:56,437 --> 00:03:57,237 - OH, IT WAS JUST LAST NIGHT. 107 00:03:57,271 --> 00:03:59,607 NOW, I KNOW IT'S A ONE-NIGHT STAND 108 00:03:59,640 --> 00:04:00,941 AND THAT SHE'S LEAVING TOWN, 109 00:04:00,974 --> 00:04:03,544 BUT OUR FEROCIOUS SEXUAL DECATHLON 110 00:04:03,577 --> 00:04:05,446 DID RADICALLY IMPROVE MY MOOD. 111 00:04:05,479 --> 00:04:08,048 AND I KIND OF LIKE TO SEE HER AGAIN BEFORE SHE LEAVES. 112 00:04:08,081 --> 00:04:10,551 GOOD IDEA? BAD IDEA? 113 00:04:10,584 --> 00:04:11,952 - I DON'T KNOW. 114 00:04:11,985 --> 00:04:14,388 I GUESS THE CAMPAIGN'S OVER, SO... 115 00:04:14,422 --> 00:04:15,856 I SUPPOSE IT COULDN'T HURT. 116 00:04:15,889 --> 00:04:18,992 - ANN PERKINS. 117 00:04:20,394 --> 00:04:23,364 - APRIL! GOT YOUR MESSAGE. 118 00:04:23,397 --> 00:04:24,398 WHERE ARE YOU? 119 00:04:24,432 --> 00:04:25,499 - UNDER THE TABLE. 120 00:04:25,533 --> 00:04:28,736 - [chuckles] WHY ARE YOU HIDING? 121 00:04:28,769 --> 00:04:31,038 SHOULD I HIDE TOO? WHAT'S GOING ON? 122 00:04:31,071 --> 00:04:32,940 - I WAS SUPPOSED TO COPY ALL THE DEPARTMENT FILES 123 00:04:32,973 --> 00:04:34,642 ONTO A THUMB DRIVE, AND IT KEPT FREEZING, 124 00:04:34,675 --> 00:04:36,377 AND I GOT ANNOYED, AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED, 125 00:04:36,410 --> 00:04:39,380 BUT ALL THE FILES ARE GONE ON EVERY COMPUTER. 126 00:04:39,413 --> 00:04:40,748 THEY'RE ALL GONE. BABE, THEY'RE ALL GONE. 127 00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:41,615 - OKAY, OKAY. CALM DOWN. 128 00:04:41,649 --> 00:04:43,551 FIRST OF ALL, YOU DID THE RIGHT THING 129 00:04:43,584 --> 00:04:45,419 BY HIDING UNDER THIS TABLE. 130 00:04:45,453 --> 00:04:47,721 SECONDLY, YOUR MAN IS HERE. 131 00:04:47,755 --> 00:04:49,590 I'M GONNA TAKE CARE OF THIS FOR US. 132 00:04:49,623 --> 00:04:51,792 I'VE BEEN PLAYING XBOX FOR YEARS. 133 00:04:51,825 --> 00:04:54,628 I'M REALLY GOOD AT FIXING IT WHEN IT FREEZES. 134 00:04:54,662 --> 00:04:55,929 I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT TO DO. 135 00:04:55,963 --> 00:04:58,399 [blows air] 136 00:04:59,433 --> 00:05:00,701 [crash] 137 00:05:02,436 --> 00:05:03,971 TRY IT NOW. 138 00:05:04,004 --> 00:05:05,573 - I DON'T KNOW. 139 00:05:05,606 --> 00:05:06,807 I FEEL LIKE I'M FORGETTING SOMETHING. 140 00:05:06,840 --> 00:05:08,476 WHAT ABOUT MY SPEECHES? 141 00:05:08,509 --> 00:05:09,510 - FINISHED BOTH OF THEM LAST NIGHT. 142 00:05:09,543 --> 00:05:10,811 ONE IF YOU WIN, ONE IF YOU LOSE. 143 00:05:10,844 --> 00:05:11,945 - WHAT IF I TIE? 144 00:05:11,979 --> 00:05:13,447 YOU NEED TO WRITE A TIE-SPEECH FOR ME, 145 00:05:13,481 --> 00:05:15,949 SOMETHING ABOUT THE POETIC NATURE OF DEMOCRACY 146 00:05:15,983 --> 00:05:17,685 AND HOW I'M GOING FIGHT THIS THING FROM MY PRISON CELL-- 147 00:05:17,718 --> 00:05:19,119 - LESLIE, RELAX. WE'RE DONE. 148 00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:20,388 ALL THAT'S LEFT IS THE WAITING. 149 00:05:20,421 --> 00:05:21,522 OKAY? 150 00:05:21,555 --> 00:05:23,524 - WHAT WERE YOU TALKING TO JEN ABOUT? 151 00:05:24,558 --> 00:05:25,726 - OH, NOTHING. 152 00:05:25,759 --> 00:05:29,463 NO, I JUST--YEAH, NOTHING. SHE--SHE'S-- 153 00:05:29,497 --> 00:05:31,365 NOTHING. NOTHING. IT'S NOTHING. 154 00:05:31,399 --> 00:05:33,367 HEY, WHAT'S A GOOD PLACE TO BUY JEANS? 155 00:05:33,401 --> 00:05:35,369 - YOU HAVE PLENTY OF JEANS. 156 00:05:35,403 --> 00:05:37,438 WHAT WERE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 157 00:05:37,471 --> 00:05:41,542 - JEN OFFERED ME A JOB WORKING ON A CONGRESSIONAL CAMPAIGN... 158 00:05:41,575 --> 00:05:42,710 - OH, MY GOD, THAT'S AMAZING. 159 00:05:42,743 --> 00:05:43,744 - IN WASHINGTON. 160 00:05:43,777 --> 00:05:45,513 - WHAT? 161 00:05:45,546 --> 00:05:47,781 - ARE YOU HAPPY OR ANGRY? 162 00:05:47,815 --> 00:05:49,817 - I DON'T KNOW. I DON'T KNOW. 163 00:05:49,850 --> 00:05:52,019 WHAT DID YOU SAY? DID YOU SAY, "YES?" 164 00:05:52,052 --> 00:05:53,587 - I HAVEN'T HAD A CHANCE TO THINK ABOUT IT. 165 00:05:53,621 --> 00:05:55,689 I MEAN, IT SOUNDS AMAZING, 166 00:05:55,723 --> 00:05:58,826 BUT YOU KNOW, SIX MONTHS IN WASHINGTON, D.C. 167 00:05:58,859 --> 00:06:02,763 AWAY FROM YOU, BUT YOU KNOW, WE SHOULD TALK ABOUT IT. 168 00:06:02,796 --> 00:06:03,797 - YEAH. WE'LL JUST TALK ABOUT IT. 169 00:06:03,831 --> 00:06:04,798 YOU KNOW, WE'LL MULL IT OVER, 170 00:06:04,832 --> 00:06:06,400 WE'LL LOOK AT IT FROM EVERY SIDE. 171 00:06:06,434 --> 00:06:07,435 ET CETERA, ET CETERA. JUST-- 172 00:06:07,468 --> 00:06:08,268 I'M GOING TO GO VOTE, 173 00:06:08,301 --> 00:06:10,471 JUST FULFILL A LIFELONG DREAM OF MINE 174 00:06:10,504 --> 00:06:12,039 AND ACHIEVE ONE OF MY ALL-TIME HAPPIEST MOMENTS 175 00:06:12,072 --> 00:06:14,475 REAL QUICK, AND THEN WE WILL TALK ABOUT IT. 176 00:06:14,508 --> 00:06:16,610 - COOL. 177 00:06:20,047 --> 00:06:21,582 - [sighs] 178 00:06:30,958 --> 00:06:33,627 [crying] 179 00:06:33,661 --> 00:06:35,496 - LESLIE, I CAN'T FIGURE THIS THING OUT. 180 00:06:35,529 --> 00:06:36,597 CAN YOU HELP ME? 181 00:06:36,630 --> 00:06:37,698 - YEAH, JUST HANG ON A SECOND, BOBBY. 182 00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:38,566 - INK ALL OVER MY HANDS, 183 00:06:38,599 --> 00:06:41,469 AND THE PEN THING-Y CAME OFF THE CHAIN. 184 00:06:41,502 --> 00:06:43,604 I DON'T GET IT! 185 00:06:44,204 --> 00:06:47,207 [indistinct chatter] 186 00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:48,942 - THE POLLS HAVE JUST CLOSED, 187 00:06:48,976 --> 00:06:51,178 AND NOW WE'RE GETTING RESULTS IN THE RACE FOR CITY COUNCIL. 188 00:06:51,211 --> 00:06:53,514 WITH JUST 1% OF THE PRECINCTS REPORTING, 189 00:06:53,547 --> 00:06:56,884 ADULT FILM STAR BRANDI MAXXXX HAS A COMMANDING LEAD. 190 00:06:56,917 --> 00:06:58,218 - OH, MY GOD. THAT'S IT. 191 00:06:58,251 --> 00:06:59,887 IT'S NOT BOBBY NEWPORT WHO'S GOING TO BEAT ME, 192 00:06:59,920 --> 00:07:01,221 IT'S BRANDI MAXXXX, THE PORN STAR. 193 00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:02,590 WHAT IS THIS? ITALY? 194 00:07:02,623 --> 00:07:03,957 - LISTEN, I KNOW YOU'RE STRESSED OUT, 195 00:07:03,991 --> 00:07:05,192 AND I FIGURED YOU WOULD BE, 196 00:07:05,225 --> 00:07:06,994 SO I TOOK THE LIBERTY OF ARRANGING 197 00:07:07,027 --> 00:07:08,529 A FUN LITTLE ACTIVITY FOR US. 198 00:07:08,562 --> 00:07:09,697 - YOU DID? - MM-HMM. 199 00:07:09,730 --> 00:07:10,831 - OH, ANN. THANK YOU SO MUCH. 200 00:07:10,864 --> 00:07:12,132 I'VE SAID THIS TO YOU BEFORE, 201 00:07:12,165 --> 00:07:13,133 AND I KNOW IT MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE... 202 00:07:13,166 --> 00:07:14,134 - OH, BOY. 203 00:07:14,167 --> 00:07:16,036 - BUT YOU'RE THOUGHTFUL, AND YOU'RE BRILLIANT, 204 00:07:16,069 --> 00:07:18,138 AND YOUR AMBIGUOUS ETHNIC BLEND PERFECTLY REPRESENTS 205 00:07:18,171 --> 00:07:20,808 THE DREAM OF THE AMERICAN MELTING POT. 206 00:07:20,841 --> 00:07:23,010 - OKAY, LET'S GO. 207 00:07:25,779 --> 00:07:28,181 - ANOTHER, DANA, PLEASE AND THANK YOU. 208 00:07:28,215 --> 00:07:30,784 - RON, I HANDED OUT 1,000 LEAFLETS TODAY. 209 00:07:30,818 --> 00:07:33,554 THAT IS A PERSONAL BEST. NOW I'M OFF TO VOTE. 210 00:07:33,587 --> 00:07:34,822 - THE POLLS ARE CLOSED. 211 00:07:34,855 --> 00:07:36,857 - WHAT? NO, NO, NO. 212 00:07:36,890 --> 00:07:37,858 I THOUGHT THAT THEY CLOSE AT 8:00. 213 00:07:37,891 --> 00:07:40,494 - 6:00. 214 00:07:40,528 --> 00:07:41,729 - OH, MY GOD. 215 00:07:41,762 --> 00:07:43,230 RON, I DIDN'T GET TO VOTE FOR LESLIE. 216 00:07:43,263 --> 00:07:44,732 OH, MY GOD, WHAT DO I DO? 217 00:07:44,765 --> 00:07:45,733 - NOTHING YOU CAN DO. 218 00:07:45,766 --> 00:07:48,201 EXCEPT HOPE LESLIE DOESN'T LOSE BY ONE VOTE. 219 00:07:48,235 --> 00:07:52,139 - 9% OF PRECINCTS REPORTING, AND IT'S RAZOR-THIN 220 00:07:52,172 --> 00:07:54,041 AND GETTING RAZOR-THINNER. 221 00:07:54,074 --> 00:07:55,643 - OH, BOY. 222 00:07:55,676 --> 00:07:57,077 - NO. NO. 223 00:07:57,110 --> 00:07:58,679 - JEN BARKLEY. 224 00:07:58,712 --> 00:08:01,782 - HEY. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 225 00:08:01,815 --> 00:08:04,918 THAT WAS FUN LAST NIGHT, YOU OLD SCREAMER. 226 00:08:04,952 --> 00:08:07,187 - THERE WERE MOMENTS THAT I DIDN'T FULLY UNDERSTAND 227 00:08:07,220 --> 00:08:08,722 SOME OF THE PHYSICAL SHAPES THAT WE WERE MAKING... 228 00:08:08,756 --> 00:08:09,590 - MM. 229 00:08:09,623 --> 00:08:11,058 - BUT THE SENSATIONS WERE AMAZING. 230 00:08:11,091 --> 00:08:12,926 SO I JUST WENT WITH IT. - GREAT. 231 00:08:12,960 --> 00:08:14,528 - WELL, I THOUGHT THAT WE COULD JUST TALK 232 00:08:14,562 --> 00:08:16,096 BEFORE YOU LEFT TOWN IF THAT'S OKAY. 233 00:08:16,129 --> 00:08:18,632 - NO, BUT THERE'S A SUPPLY ROOM OVER THERE WITH A FUTON. 234 00:08:18,666 --> 00:08:20,100 - GREAT. 235 00:08:20,133 --> 00:08:23,236 - NOT YET. JUST WAIT-- WE'RE JUST GETTING SUPPLIES. 236 00:08:23,270 --> 00:08:26,607 ANYBODY NEED ANYTHING? PUSHPINS--OKAY, GOOD. 237 00:08:26,640 --> 00:08:28,241 - PLEASE HURRY. [phone clicks] 238 00:08:28,275 --> 00:08:30,143 I TOLD HER IT'S A MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH. 239 00:08:30,177 --> 00:08:31,745 HONEY, DONNA'S BEEN HERE FOREVER. 240 00:08:31,779 --> 00:08:32,746 SHE'S GOING TO KNOW WHAT TO DO. 241 00:08:32,780 --> 00:08:33,914 - WHAT IF SHE DOESN'T? 242 00:08:33,947 --> 00:08:35,248 I COULD GET FIRED. 243 00:08:35,282 --> 00:08:37,918 OR EVEN WORSE, LESLIE MIGHT GIVE ME A LECTURE 244 00:08:37,951 --> 00:08:39,753 ON RESPONSIBILITY AGAIN, I CAN'T DO IT. 245 00:08:39,787 --> 00:08:40,688 - I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, HONEY. 246 00:08:40,721 --> 00:08:43,657 HERE'S THE DEAL. YOU GET FIRED, I'LL QUIT. 247 00:08:43,691 --> 00:08:44,758 WE'LL LEAVE TOGETHER. 248 00:08:44,792 --> 00:08:46,326 - I'M SERIOUS. MOVE TO A NEW CITY. 249 00:08:46,359 --> 00:08:47,895 CHANGE OUR NAMES, 250 00:08:47,928 --> 00:08:50,063 BURN OUR FINGERTIPS OFF WITH ACID, 251 00:08:50,097 --> 00:08:51,565 SWAP FACES. 252 00:08:51,599 --> 00:08:53,333 - WHAT? - IF WE HAVE TO. 253 00:08:53,366 --> 00:08:54,835 - GOOD. 254 00:08:54,868 --> 00:08:57,070 YES. NICE. KEEP PUNCHING. 255 00:08:57,104 --> 00:08:58,238 - DID I HIT YOUR BOOB? - NO. 256 00:08:58,271 --> 00:08:59,707 - SORRY. 257 00:08:59,740 --> 00:09:00,708 - GREAT FORM. 258 00:09:00,741 --> 00:09:02,610 MAYBE. I HAVE NO IDEA ACTUALLY. 259 00:09:02,643 --> 00:09:04,344 I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING. YEAH! 260 00:09:04,377 --> 00:09:05,846 THAT WAS GOOD. - I'M EXHAUSTED. 261 00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:06,947 HOW LONG WAS THAT? 262 00:09:06,980 --> 00:09:07,681 - 22 SECONDS. 263 00:09:07,715 --> 00:09:09,883 - BOY, THAT'S DISAPPOINTING. 264 00:09:09,917 --> 00:09:12,052 - WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT BEN? 265 00:09:12,085 --> 00:09:14,054 - I JUST--I'VE BEEN RUNNING FOR OFFICE THE ENTIRE TIME 266 00:09:14,087 --> 00:09:15,188 WE'VE BEEN DATING. 267 00:09:15,222 --> 00:09:17,891 WE'RE JUST ABOUT TO GET OUR LIVES BACK. 268 00:09:17,925 --> 00:09:19,326 IT WOULD KILL ME IF HE LEFT. 269 00:09:19,359 --> 00:09:20,661 - THEN TELL HIM THAT. 270 00:09:20,694 --> 00:09:23,030 GO FIND HIM AND TELL HIM HOW YOU FEEL. 271 00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:24,998 AND THEN THE TWO OF YOU COULD WORK IT OUT TOGETHER. 272 00:09:25,032 --> 00:09:27,801 [cell phone rings] 273 00:09:27,835 --> 00:09:28,869 - ELECTION RESULTS, ANN. 274 00:09:28,902 --> 00:09:30,904 ANN, ANN, I CAN'T READ IT. 275 00:09:30,938 --> 00:09:32,272 - OKAY. - ANN, MY HANDS. MY HANDS, ANN. 276 00:09:32,305 --> 00:09:33,273 - HERE. - THEY'RE IN THESE ROUND GLOVES. 277 00:09:33,306 --> 00:09:35,108 - HERE. OKAY. 278 00:09:35,142 --> 00:09:36,644 20% OF THE PRECINCTS REPORTING. 279 00:09:36,677 --> 00:09:40,047 BOBBY NEWPORT IS UP BY 140 VOTES. 280 00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:42,215 - OKAY. LET'S GET YOUR HANDS BACK UP. 281 00:09:42,249 --> 00:09:44,217 - OKAY. - GO ANOTHER EIGHT SECONDS. 282 00:09:44,251 --> 00:09:45,218 [grunts] 283 00:09:45,252 --> 00:09:46,386 OH, GOD, I'M SO TIRED. 284 00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:48,889 - GIN AND TONIC, PLEASE. 285 00:09:48,922 --> 00:09:53,193 - BELAY THAT ORDER, DANA. LAGAVULIN, NEAT. 286 00:09:53,226 --> 00:09:57,631 CLEAR ALCOHOLS ARE FOR RICH WOMEN ON DIETS. 287 00:09:57,665 --> 00:09:59,900 WHAT'S ON YOUR MIND, SON? 288 00:09:59,933 --> 00:10:04,772 - WELL, JEN BARKLEY OFFERED ME A JOB IN WASHINGTON. 289 00:10:04,805 --> 00:10:09,843 A GREAT JOB, BUT I THINK LESLIE WANTS ME TO STAY. 290 00:10:09,877 --> 00:10:10,944 WHAT WOULD YOU DO? 291 00:10:10,978 --> 00:10:14,081 - WELL, I'VE NEVER BEEN ONE FOR MEETING NEW PEOPLE 292 00:10:14,114 --> 00:10:18,351 OR DOING NEW THINGS OR EATING NEW TYPES OF FOOD 293 00:10:18,385 --> 00:10:21,021 OR TRAVELING OUTSIDE OF SOUTHERN INDIANA. 294 00:10:21,054 --> 00:10:24,024 I'VE HAD THE SAME HAIRCUT SINCE 1978, 295 00:10:24,057 --> 00:10:26,794 AND I'VE DRIVEN THE SAME CAR SINCE 1991. 296 00:10:26,827 --> 00:10:30,731 I'VE USED THE SAME WOODEN COMB FOR THREE DECADES. 297 00:10:30,764 --> 00:10:32,165 I HAVE ONE BOWL. 298 00:10:32,199 --> 00:10:34,334 I STILL GET MY MILK DELIVERED BY HORSE. 299 00:10:34,367 --> 00:10:35,836 - YOU DO? 300 00:10:35,869 --> 00:10:37,838 - BUT YOU AND LESLIE LIKE TO HOLD HANDS 301 00:10:37,871 --> 00:10:41,842 AND JUMP OFF OF CLIFFS TOGETHER INTO THE GREAT UNKNOWN. 302 00:10:41,875 --> 00:10:43,744 [shudders] 303 00:10:43,777 --> 00:10:47,214 YOU TWO HAVE A GOOD RELATIONSHIP. 304 00:10:47,247 --> 00:10:50,017 I DON'T PERSONALLY KNOW WHAT THAT'S LIKE, 305 00:10:50,050 --> 00:10:53,086 BUT I'M GIVEN TO UNDERSTAND THAT MEANS YOU'RE GOING TO LAND 306 00:10:53,120 --> 00:10:54,321 ON YOUR FEET. 307 00:10:54,354 --> 00:11:00,060 - SO YOU REALLY WANT THINGS TO JUST STAY EXACTLY THE SAME? 308 00:11:00,093 --> 00:11:02,095 BUT IF LESLIE WINS, YOU GET MY OLD JOB, 309 00:11:02,129 --> 00:11:03,931 ASSISTANT CITY MANAGER, RIGHT? 310 00:11:03,964 --> 00:11:05,298 - SEEMS THAT WAY. 311 00:11:05,332 --> 00:11:08,068 - THEN GOOD LUCK TO THE BOTH OF US. 312 00:11:08,101 --> 00:11:09,102 [clink] 313 00:11:12,072 --> 00:11:13,941 HEY--UH! 314 00:11:13,974 --> 00:11:14,975 HMM! 315 00:11:17,110 --> 00:11:19,947 - I HAVE AN UPDATE THAT CONTAINS NEW INFORMATION. 316 00:11:19,980 --> 00:11:22,850 WITH 74% OF THE PRECINCTS REPORTING, 317 00:11:22,883 --> 00:11:26,053 LESLIE KNOPE IS NOW WINNING BY 192 VOTES. 318 00:11:26,086 --> 00:11:27,220 [crowd cheering] - OH, THANK GOD. 319 00:11:27,254 --> 00:11:29,322 OH, LORD, PLEASE, PLEASE. LET HER WIN. 320 00:11:29,356 --> 00:11:30,490 PLEASE, LORD. PLEASE, LORD, LET HER WIN. 321 00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:32,025 PLEASE LET HER WIN. 322 00:11:32,059 --> 00:11:34,427 - I'M JUST GOING TO SAY THIS. 323 00:11:34,461 --> 00:11:36,997 AND I REALIZE THIS AFTER SPEAKING WITH MY BEST FRIEND 324 00:11:37,030 --> 00:11:38,131 AND RELATIONSHIP ADVISOR ANN PERKINS 325 00:11:38,165 --> 00:11:39,132 FROM THE DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH. 326 00:11:39,166 --> 00:11:41,101 - YES, I KNOW ANN. 327 00:11:41,134 --> 00:11:42,770 - I DON'T WANT YOU TO GO TO WASHINGTON. 328 00:11:42,803 --> 00:11:45,138 I KNOW IT'S AN AMAZING OPPORTUNITY, 329 00:11:45,172 --> 00:11:47,174 BUT IN JUST A FEW MINUTES, ALL THIS CRAZINESS 330 00:11:47,207 --> 00:11:48,041 IS GOING TO BE OVER, 331 00:11:48,075 --> 00:11:51,879 AND I JUST WANT TO HAVE DINNER WITH YOU. 332 00:11:51,912 --> 00:11:53,480 LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE. 333 00:11:53,513 --> 00:11:55,048 - YEAH, THEN I WON'T GO. 334 00:11:55,082 --> 00:11:56,383 - REALLY? 335 00:11:56,416 --> 00:11:58,118 - YEAH. EASY. 336 00:11:58,151 --> 00:11:59,920 I MEAN, I WAS ON THE FENCE ABOUT IT ANYWAY. 337 00:11:59,953 --> 00:12:02,022 WASHINGTON'S REALLY FAR AWAY, 338 00:12:02,055 --> 00:12:03,924 AND I DON'T KNOW IF I WANT TO WORK WITH JEN. 339 00:12:03,957 --> 00:12:05,926 I MEAN, THIS JUST SEALS THE DEAL. I'LL STAY. 340 00:12:05,959 --> 00:12:08,061 - [sighs] OH, THANK GOD. 341 00:12:08,095 --> 00:12:10,263 WHAT A RELIEF. 342 00:12:10,297 --> 00:12:13,033 - GUYS. 343 00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:15,168 - IT'S BEEN NECK-IN-NECK, TOO CLOSE TO CALL ALL NIGHT, 344 00:12:15,202 --> 00:12:16,904 BUT NOW WE'RE READY TO MAKE A CALL 345 00:12:16,937 --> 00:12:18,238 IN THE RACE FOR CITY COUNCIL. 346 00:12:18,271 --> 00:12:19,239 - BOBBY NEWPORT... 347 00:12:19,272 --> 00:12:20,340 - OH, NO. 348 00:12:20,373 --> 00:12:22,042 - SCION OF THE SWEETUMS CANDY EMPIRE 349 00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:24,978 AND AMATEUR GO-KART CHAMPION HAS WON THE RACE. 350 00:12:25,012 --> 00:12:27,514 - [laughing hysterically] 351 00:12:27,547 --> 00:12:29,049 - WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING? 352 00:12:29,082 --> 00:12:31,284 - [laughs] BECAUSE MY DREAM IS DEAD. 353 00:12:32,853 --> 00:12:34,855 OH, OH. 354 00:12:34,888 --> 00:12:36,156 OH, [bleep]. 355 00:12:37,925 --> 00:12:39,426 - RECOUNT. THERE'S A RECOUNT. 356 00:12:39,459 --> 00:12:41,161 - OH, COME ON. IT'S OVER. 357 00:12:41,194 --> 00:12:42,195 JUST CONCEDE. 358 00:12:42,229 --> 00:12:43,496 - NEWPORT WON BY 21 VOTES. 359 00:12:43,530 --> 00:12:45,532 THAT'S WELL WITHIN THE MARGIN FOR A RECOUNT. 360 00:12:45,565 --> 00:12:48,168 - PLEASE DON'T DO THIS. I REALLY WANT TO GET OUT OF HERE. 361 00:12:48,201 --> 00:12:50,570 HOW ABOUT THIS--WHY DON'T I MAKE YOU GUYS A DEAL? 362 00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:51,571 - OKAY, THERE'S NO DEAL IN THE WORLD 363 00:12:51,604 --> 00:12:53,073 THAT WE WOULD EVER POSSIBLY-- 364 00:12:53,106 --> 00:12:54,174 - I'LL GIVE YOU JOE BIDEN'S HOME PHONE NUMBER. 365 00:12:54,207 --> 00:12:55,375 - NOW, HANG ON. THAT'S INTERESTING. 366 00:12:55,408 --> 00:12:56,977 - NO, NO, YOU'RE NOT THINKING CLEARLY. 367 00:12:57,010 --> 00:12:57,878 MR. COMMISSIONER, 368 00:12:57,911 --> 00:12:59,847 THE RECOUNT HAS TO START IMMEDIATELY. 369 00:12:59,880 --> 00:13:01,048 IT'S THE LAW. 370 00:13:01,081 --> 00:13:02,382 NOW I'M NOT LEAVING UNTIL YOU MAKE THE CALL. 371 00:13:02,415 --> 00:13:05,118 - HE'S RIGHT, MS. BARKLEY. IT'LL START RIGHT AWAY. 372 00:13:05,152 --> 00:13:07,955 KEEP YOUR PHONES ON. - TERRENCE. 373 00:13:07,988 --> 00:13:11,258 I JUST WANT TO GO HOME. 374 00:13:11,291 --> 00:13:12,459 - HEY, ANY NEWS? 375 00:13:12,492 --> 00:13:15,562 THEY SAID THE RECOUNT COULD TAKE TWO HOURS, BUT WHO KNOWS. 376 00:13:15,595 --> 00:13:16,563 - MAN, THIS IS STRESSFUL. 377 00:13:16,596 --> 00:13:18,231 I PICKED THE WRONG WEEK TO DO A JUICE CLEANSE. 378 00:13:18,265 --> 00:13:20,233 - OKAY, I THINK LESLIE SHOULD SAY SOMETHING 379 00:13:20,267 --> 00:13:22,202 TO THE TROOPS JUST TO GET EVERYONE'S SPIRITS UP. 380 00:13:22,235 --> 00:13:23,270 WHERE IS SHE? - I DON'T KNOW. 381 00:13:23,303 --> 00:13:26,306 SHE'S NOT ANSWERING HER PHONE. 382 00:13:26,339 --> 00:13:28,441 - WHAT? NO ONE KNOWS WHERE SHE IS? 383 00:13:30,911 --> 00:13:32,880 [door closes] 384 00:13:33,981 --> 00:13:36,116 - THAT'S A NICE CHAIR. 385 00:13:36,149 --> 00:13:39,519 CORINTHIAN LEATHER, SOLID MAHOGANY FRAME 386 00:13:39,552 --> 00:13:42,455 WITH WHAT I BELIEVE ARE HAND-CUT MORTISE AND TENON JOINTS 387 00:13:42,489 --> 00:13:44,191 PINNED WITH OAK. 388 00:13:44,224 --> 00:13:46,193 - I WAS REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO SITTING IN IT. 389 00:13:46,226 --> 00:13:48,228 FIGURED THIS MIGHT BE MY LAST CHANCE. 390 00:13:48,261 --> 00:13:50,230 - YOU DON'T KNOW THAT. 391 00:13:50,263 --> 00:13:52,199 - RON, FOR THE LAST SIX MONTHS, 392 00:13:52,232 --> 00:13:53,934 MY FRIENDS HAVE WORKED SO HARD. 393 00:13:53,967 --> 00:13:56,103 EVERY FIVE-MINUTE COFFEE BREAK AT WORK, 394 00:13:56,136 --> 00:13:58,271 EVERY NIGHT, EVERY WEEKEND, 395 00:13:58,305 --> 00:14:00,273 EVERY SPARE MOMENT OF THEIR LIVES, 396 00:14:00,307 --> 00:14:01,541 THEY GAVE TO ME. 397 00:14:01,574 --> 00:14:05,345 IF I LOSE, I'LL NEVER FORGIVE MYSELF. 398 00:14:05,378 --> 00:14:07,247 YOU DESERVE TO WIN. 399 00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:10,217 - WE DIDN'T VOLUNTEER TO HELP YOU 400 00:14:10,250 --> 00:14:13,586 BECAUSE WE WANTED TO WRAP OURSELVES IN PERSONAL GLORY. 401 00:14:13,620 --> 00:14:18,291 WE DID IT BECAUSE WE...CARE ABOUT YOU. 402 00:14:18,325 --> 00:14:21,328 YOU HAD A DREAM, AND WE WANTED TO SUPPORT YOUR DREAM. 403 00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:24,431 THAT'S WHAT YOU DO WHEN YOU CARE ABOUT SOMEONE. 404 00:14:24,464 --> 00:14:27,267 YOU SUPPORT THEM, WIN, LOSE, OR DRAW. 405 00:14:27,300 --> 00:14:29,536 LET'S GO BACK TO THE PARTY. 406 00:14:29,569 --> 00:14:33,306 YOU DRIVE. I'VE HAD 11 WHISKEYS. 407 00:14:33,340 --> 00:14:35,308 - OKAY. THAT'S GOOD ON PLACES TO LIVE. 408 00:14:35,342 --> 00:14:37,444 LET'S GO BACK TO DREAM JOBS. 409 00:14:37,477 --> 00:14:39,646 IF WE HAD TO START A NEW LIFE, 410 00:14:39,679 --> 00:14:43,016 I HAVE DETECTIVE, FBI AGENT, POLICEMAN, CIA AGENT. 411 00:14:43,050 --> 00:14:44,417 SO WE NEED MORE FOR YOU. LET'S GO. 412 00:14:44,451 --> 00:14:46,219 - ANDY, I-- - IT'S FUN. 413 00:14:46,253 --> 00:14:47,387 I'M TRYING TO HELP YOU 414 00:14:47,420 --> 00:14:49,589 TAKE YOUR MIND OFF OF THIS HORRIBLE MISTAKE 415 00:14:49,622 --> 00:14:51,591 YOU MADE DELETING ALL THESE FILES, 416 00:14:51,624 --> 00:14:53,293 PROBABLY THE WORST THING TO EVER HAPPEN 417 00:14:53,326 --> 00:14:54,661 IN PARKS AND REC HISTORY. 418 00:14:54,694 --> 00:14:57,364 YOU WILL CERTAINLY GET FIRED, AND I'M TRYING TO HELP. 419 00:14:57,397 --> 00:14:58,198 - GOD. 420 00:14:58,231 --> 00:15:00,467 - SO DREAM JOBS, GO. DREAM BIG, KID! 421 00:15:00,500 --> 00:15:01,668 - FINE. 422 00:15:01,701 --> 00:15:04,437 UH, DENTAL HYGIENIST WHO'S ALSO A MEDIUM, 423 00:15:04,471 --> 00:15:05,939 SO I CAN CLEAN PEOPLE'S TEETH 424 00:15:05,973 --> 00:15:07,274 AND TELL THEM WHEN THEY'RE GOING TO DIE. 425 00:15:07,307 --> 00:15:09,042 - THAT'S BRILLIANT. 426 00:15:09,076 --> 00:15:10,243 - LET'S MAKE THIS FAST. 427 00:15:10,277 --> 00:15:11,611 I ALMOST MADE IT WITH COUNCILMAN HOWSER 428 00:15:11,644 --> 00:15:12,645 BEFORE YOU INTERRUPTED US. 429 00:15:12,679 --> 00:15:14,047 WHICH FILES DID YOU DELETE? 430 00:15:14,081 --> 00:15:15,148 - ALL OF THEM. 431 00:15:15,182 --> 00:15:17,384 I JUST PUT THE STUPID FLASH DRIVE IN, 432 00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:18,385 AND THEN I TRIED TO DRAG EVERYTHING OVER, AND-- 433 00:15:18,418 --> 00:15:19,386 - FIXED IT. 434 00:15:19,419 --> 00:15:20,453 - WHAT? - WHAT? HOW? 435 00:15:20,487 --> 00:15:22,722 - JERRY ACCIDENTALLY DELETES THINGS ALL THE TIME. 436 00:15:22,755 --> 00:15:25,125 TEN YEARS AGO, I INSTALLED MY OWN SECRET BACKUP. 437 00:15:25,158 --> 00:15:27,494 - YOU SAVED US, DONNA. - OH. 438 00:15:27,527 --> 00:15:28,495 - I LOVE YOU. - OH. 439 00:15:28,528 --> 00:15:30,230 OKAY. BRING IT IN, BOY. 440 00:15:30,263 --> 00:15:31,598 - [giggles] 441 00:15:31,631 --> 00:15:33,366 [door opens] 442 00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:34,667 - THERE YOU ARE. THANK GOD. 443 00:15:34,701 --> 00:15:36,636 WE'RE GOING TO GET THE FINAL RESULTS ANY MINUTE. 444 00:15:36,669 --> 00:15:39,506 - I KNOW. DO YOU HAVE BOTH MY SPEECHES? 445 00:15:39,539 --> 00:15:40,673 - YES. 446 00:15:40,707 --> 00:15:43,376 YOU SEEM CALMER THAN I EXPECTED YOU'D BE. 447 00:15:43,410 --> 00:15:46,013 - I GOT YOU SOMETHING. 448 00:15:46,046 --> 00:15:49,049 LET ME OPEN IT FOR YOU. 449 00:15:53,553 --> 00:15:55,288 YOU HAVE TO GO TO WASHINGTON. 450 00:15:55,322 --> 00:15:57,490 - I TOLD YOU I'M TURNING IT DOWN. 451 00:15:57,524 --> 00:15:59,326 - I WAS BEING SELFISH. 452 00:15:59,359 --> 00:16:02,362 YOU PUT YOUR WHOLE LIFE ON HOLD FOR ME. 453 00:16:02,395 --> 00:16:06,033 THE VERY LEAST I CAN DO IS TRY TO RETURN THE FAVOR. 454 00:16:06,066 --> 00:16:08,001 - ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THIS? 455 00:16:08,035 --> 00:16:09,602 - WE CAN MAKE IT WORK. 456 00:16:09,636 --> 00:16:12,172 I WILL VISIT YOU, THEN YOU COME VISIT ME. 457 00:16:12,205 --> 00:16:13,206 AND THEN I GO VISIT YOU AGAIN. 458 00:16:13,240 --> 00:16:16,043 AND THEN WE MAKE OUT IN THE LINCOLN BEDROOM... 459 00:16:16,076 --> 00:16:17,644 - [laughs] - AND THE JEFFERSON MEMORIAL 460 00:16:17,677 --> 00:16:19,646 AND THE SUPREME COURT GALLERY. 461 00:16:19,679 --> 00:16:21,614 WE'LL DO IT ALL OVER WASHINGTON. 462 00:16:21,648 --> 00:16:24,384 - THANK YOU. 463 00:16:26,119 --> 00:16:28,388 WHERE DID YOU GET A WASHINGTON MONUMENT FIGURINE 464 00:16:28,421 --> 00:16:30,223 AT MIDNIGHT ON A TUESDAY? 465 00:16:30,257 --> 00:16:33,526 - FROM MY OFFICE. I HAVE, LIKE, 50 OF THEM. 466 00:16:33,560 --> 00:16:35,462 - RIGHT. 467 00:16:35,495 --> 00:16:37,197 - THE RECOUNT'S OVER. 468 00:16:37,230 --> 00:16:38,398 THEY JUST CALLED THE RACE. 469 00:16:38,431 --> 00:16:42,302 - OH, GOD. 470 00:16:42,335 --> 00:16:47,674 - IT'S STILL 21 VOTES. 471 00:16:47,707 --> 00:16:53,046 BUT YOU WON. 472 00:16:53,080 --> 00:16:56,683 YOU WON, LESLIE. YOU WON BY 21 VOTES. 473 00:16:56,716 --> 00:16:59,386 IT'S CONFIRMED. IT'S OVER. 474 00:16:59,419 --> 00:17:00,720 YOU WON. 475 00:17:00,753 --> 00:17:03,123 - THAT WAS REALLY SNEAKY, ANN. - [laughs] 476 00:17:03,156 --> 00:17:04,591 - I KNOW. I COULDN'T RESIST. 477 00:17:04,624 --> 00:17:07,594 [playing upbeat music] 478 00:17:07,627 --> 00:17:11,831 [cheering] 479 00:17:11,864 --> 00:17:14,567 [singing under crowd noise] 480 00:17:14,601 --> 00:17:18,105 - HONESTLY, I'VE NEVER BEEN MORE RELIEVED IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. 481 00:17:18,138 --> 00:17:19,606 - [crying] I DIDN'T RUIN IT. 482 00:17:19,639 --> 00:17:22,309 I THOUGHT I RUINED IT, BUT I DIDN'T RUIN IT. 483 00:17:22,342 --> 00:17:23,710 - YOU'RE KIND OF RUINING IT NOW. 484 00:17:23,743 --> 00:17:25,645 - GREAT. THAT IS GREAT NEWS. 485 00:17:25,678 --> 00:17:27,480 I'M GOING TO SEE YOU IN D.C. 486 00:17:27,514 --> 00:17:29,216 - YEAH, I GUESS YOU WILL. - YEAH. 487 00:17:29,249 --> 00:17:30,817 OH, DAMN IT. 488 00:17:30,850 --> 00:17:32,585 DIDN'T GET A CHANCE TO SAY GOOD-BYE TO CHRIS. 489 00:17:32,619 --> 00:17:35,522 - OH, HE'S JUST RIGHT OVER THERE. 490 00:17:35,555 --> 00:17:36,756 - EH. HE SEEMS REALLY BUSY. 491 00:17:36,789 --> 00:17:38,458 - ANYWAY, WOULD YOU TELL HIM I SAID GOOD-BYE? 492 00:17:38,491 --> 00:17:39,359 GREAT! THANK YOU. 493 00:17:39,392 --> 00:17:40,660 SORRY WE DIDN'T GET A CHANCE TO MEET. 494 00:17:40,693 --> 00:17:42,362 - I'M ANN. - THAT DOESN'T MATTER. 495 00:17:42,395 --> 00:17:43,396 I'M LEAVING. 496 00:17:44,631 --> 00:17:47,600 [continue singing] 497 00:17:47,634 --> 00:17:52,205 - CONGRATULATIONS, MR. ASSISTANT CITY MANAGER. 498 00:17:52,239 --> 00:17:53,473 - I'M VERY GRATEFUL, CHRIS, 499 00:17:53,506 --> 00:17:56,243 BUT I THINK I'M GOING TO TURN DOWN THE JOB. 500 00:17:56,276 --> 00:17:57,244 - REALLY? WHY? 501 00:17:57,277 --> 00:17:59,746 - I LIKE WHERE I AM. 502 00:18:01,548 --> 00:18:02,482 - UH-OH, UH-OH. 503 00:18:02,515 --> 00:18:04,517 DID SOMEONE JUST TALK ABOUT A JOB OPENING? 504 00:18:04,551 --> 00:18:06,553 BECAUSE GUESS WHO'S GOT TWO THUMBS 505 00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:09,522 AND WAS JUST CLEARED FROM INSURANCE FRAUD? 506 00:18:09,556 --> 00:18:12,625 THIS GUY, YOU KNOW? 507 00:18:12,659 --> 00:18:15,628 * GOT OFF ON A TECHNICALITY 508 00:18:15,662 --> 00:18:17,597 WHAT'S THE GIG? I'M IN. 509 00:18:17,630 --> 00:18:18,398 - THERE'S NO JOB FOR YOU. 510 00:18:18,431 --> 00:18:19,299 - SMART MOVE. GO WITH YOUR GUT. 511 00:18:19,332 --> 00:18:22,502 ALL RIGHT? I'LL TALK TO YOU GUYS SOON. 512 00:18:22,535 --> 00:18:26,339 - YOUR VICTORY SPEECH, COUNCILWOMAN KNOPE. 513 00:18:26,373 --> 00:18:29,276 - SOME DAY, WHEN I'M MORE EMOTIONALLY STABLE, 514 00:18:29,309 --> 00:18:31,278 I WANT TO READ THE CONCESSION SPEECH YOU WROTE FOR ME. 515 00:18:31,311 --> 00:18:34,447 - I NEVER WROTE IT. 516 00:18:34,481 --> 00:18:36,316 - AND I KNOW ALL OF YOU KNOW 517 00:18:36,349 --> 00:18:38,318 HOW HARD SHE WORKED TO GET HERE. 518 00:18:38,351 --> 00:18:39,919 SHE IS THE NEXT CITY COUNCILWOMAN 519 00:18:39,952 --> 00:18:42,322 FROM THE GREAT CITY OF PAWNEE, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, 520 00:18:42,355 --> 00:18:44,891 MY BEST FRIEND IN THE WORLD, LESLIE KNOPE. 521 00:18:44,924 --> 00:18:49,496 [cheers and applause] 522 00:18:49,529 --> 00:18:51,698 - THE IDEA BEHIND THIS CAMPAIGN WAS A SIMPLE ONE: 523 00:18:51,731 --> 00:18:54,667 THAT WITH HARD WORK AND POSITIVITY, 524 00:18:54,701 --> 00:18:57,504 A GROUP OF PEOPLE CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE 525 00:18:57,537 --> 00:19:00,507 DURING MY TERM AS YOUR CITY COUNCILOR... 526 00:19:00,540 --> 00:19:01,574 [cheers and applause] 527 00:19:01,608 --> 00:19:03,543 THANK YOU. 528 00:19:03,576 --> 00:19:05,812 I WANT TO FOCUS ON YOUR HOPES AND NOT YOUR FEARS. 529 00:19:05,845 --> 00:19:09,516 I WANT TO SOLVE PROBLEMS INSTEAD OF CREATING FRICTION. 530 00:19:09,549 --> 00:19:13,186 AND I WILL WORK HARD EVERY HOUR OF EVERY DAY 531 00:19:13,220 --> 00:19:15,555 TO MAKE PAWNEE A BETTER PLACE TO LIVE 532 00:19:15,588 --> 00:19:20,527 BECAUSE I LOVE THIS CITY. 533 00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:25,632 AND I KNOW FIRSTHAND, HOW VERY SPECIAL 534 00:19:25,665 --> 00:19:27,667 THE PEOPLE OF THIS CITY ARE. 535 00:19:27,700 --> 00:19:30,237 I OWE THIS VICTORY, ALL OF IT, 536 00:19:30,270 --> 00:19:32,439 TO MY FRIENDS AND MY SUPPORTERS. 537 00:19:32,472 --> 00:19:35,275 NO ONE ACHIEVES ANYTHING ALONE. 538 00:19:35,308 --> 00:19:37,944 SO LET'S EMBARK ON A NEW JOURNEY TOGETHER. 539 00:19:37,977 --> 00:19:40,547 LET'S BREAK OUT A MAP. 540 00:19:40,580 --> 00:19:43,783 NOT THE OLD, OUT-OF-DATE ONE THAT SHOWS WHERE WE'VE BEEN, 541 00:19:43,816 --> 00:19:48,855 BUT A CRISP NEW ONE THAT SHOWS WHERE WE MIGHT GO. 542 00:19:48,888 --> 00:19:52,625 LET'S EMBARK ON A NEW JOURNEY TOGETHER 543 00:19:52,659 --> 00:19:55,695 AND SEE WHERE IT TAKES US. 544 00:19:55,728 --> 00:19:58,565 [cheers and applause] 545 00:19:59,999 --> 00:20:01,234 - TOMMY! 546 00:20:01,268 --> 00:20:02,869 THIS PARTY WAS AMAZING, 547 00:20:02,902 --> 00:20:03,703 YOU'RE AMAZING. 548 00:20:03,736 --> 00:20:06,839 YOU ARE RIDICULOUS, BUT I LIKE YOU, 549 00:20:06,873 --> 00:20:08,475 AND I THINK THAT WE SHOULD DATE--ALL OF IT. 550 00:20:08,508 --> 00:20:09,809 LET'S DO IT. LET'S DATE. 551 00:20:09,842 --> 00:20:13,813 - THIS IS MY DREAM. NOSTRA-THOMAS IS HAPPENING. 552 00:20:13,846 --> 00:20:16,483 - AWESOME. - HEY, LET'S MOVE IN TOGETHER. 553 00:20:16,516 --> 00:20:17,650 - PHHHHT! TOTALLY. 554 00:20:17,684 --> 00:20:19,652 - REALLY? - YEAH. 555 00:20:19,686 --> 00:20:21,954 - ALL RIGHT, NO TAKE-BACKS WHEN WE SOBER UP, LITTLE PARTNER. 556 00:20:21,988 --> 00:20:25,425 - NO TAKE-BACKS, PARTNER. [laughing] 557 00:20:25,458 --> 00:20:26,426 WE'RE COWBOYS. 558 00:20:26,459 --> 00:20:28,461 - GREAT WIN, GREAT NIGHT. 559 00:20:28,495 --> 00:20:30,530 GREAT YEAR. HOT WIFE. 560 00:20:30,563 --> 00:20:31,898 JACKPOT. 561 00:20:31,931 --> 00:20:34,601 - [laughs] 562 00:20:34,634 --> 00:20:36,603 - GOOD JOB, ME. 563 00:20:36,636 --> 00:20:37,770 - OH, MY GOD. BABE. 564 00:20:37,804 --> 00:20:38,938 YOU KNOW WHAT? 565 00:20:38,971 --> 00:20:40,540 ALMOST EVERYTHING YOU WROTE ON THAT BOARD 566 00:20:40,573 --> 00:20:42,342 AS A DREAM JOB WAS SOME TYPE OF POLICE OFFICER. 567 00:20:42,375 --> 00:20:44,644 - YEAH. YOU READY TO GO? 568 00:20:44,677 --> 00:20:45,912 - NO, LISTEN TO ME. 569 00:20:45,945 --> 00:20:46,913 - MM-HMM. - HOW DOES THIS SOUND? 570 00:20:46,946 --> 00:20:50,883 "OFFICER DWYER, PAWNEE PD." 571 00:20:50,917 --> 00:20:53,286 - GUYS, WE'RE GOING TO JJ'S FOR VICTORY WAFFLES, 572 00:20:53,320 --> 00:20:54,687 AND THEN WE'RE STAYING UP ALL NIGHT 573 00:20:54,721 --> 00:20:55,988 TALKING ABOUT OUR LIVES AND OUR FEELINGS. 574 00:20:56,022 --> 00:20:57,924 NONNEGOTIABLE. LET'S GO! 575 00:20:57,957 --> 00:21:00,527 CITY COUNCIL, BITCHES! 576 00:21:00,560 --> 00:21:01,694 [cheers and applause] 577 00:21:01,728 --> 00:21:04,597 - JERRY FORGOT TO VOTE. - DAMN IT, JERRY. 578 00:23:04,717 --> 00:23:05,718 .